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japhan2024 · 3 months

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The planet with two faces

I wrote this for @haruspeks in the @startrekwintergiftexchange ! I've worked on it for the entire month lol with my partner, we had so much fun thinking of scenarios and stuff! We also invented a Delta Quadrant planet haha :) I hope you like it! <3

"Chakotay!" Janeway calls out for her number one.

Her head hurts - the Janurean who just hit her, lays knocked out on the ground.

"Captain," a strained voice comes from behind Janeway. "We have to retreat, there is no winning this..."

"Just stay behind me!" Janeway commands. But more and more Janureans flood into the room.

"Surrender," their leader says. "And we will spare your life."

Janeway looks the hostile alien in the eye. "No."

read on ao3

One day earlier

"Captain, Seven," the Doctor greets the two women in his sick bay.

"Is this really a good idea, Seven?" Janeway frowns at her ex-borg Astrometrics officer. But a smile tugs at the corners of her mouth. Seven looks as determined as ever. A quality Janeway appreciates, as she is a stubborn person herself. Debating Seven is never dull or easy.

"My calculations are sound. I assure you, captain, it is safe."

"I concur," the Doctor says, examining the screen with data about the procedure he's about to conduct on them. He tilts his head, looking at Janeway. "You won't feel a thing."

"That's not what I am worried about," Janeway says with one eyebrow raised.

"We will be at great tactical advantage, and will not need transponders," Seven answers.

Janeway squints and scrunches her nose. Seven will always get her way in the end anyway. "Let's just get this over with..."

"What's on the menu today, buddy?" Chakotay asks Neelix with a smile.

"Oh! Well, nothing special today, I'm afraid, commander. But! Tomorrow I will have the chance to collect all kinds of delicious herbs and vegetables from Janu. I can't wait to cook with those! It's almost Voyager's birthday, did you know that? I'm going to make an excellent Voyager birthday soup!"

Chakotay looks straight at him.

"Oh! Well, today, I do have a stew, famous on Earth for it's spices and... sloppy texture..."

"Right... Thank you, Neelix."

Seven walks into the mess hall.

"Seven! What a nice surprise, I don't see you often here in the mess hall."

"I'm not here to eat," Seven tells him. I'm here to discuss the tactics of the mission with the captain and commander Chakotay."

"You know, I'm also joining your expedition!"

"You are?"

"Why yes, it's so I can collect some delicious herb-"

"Captain." Seven walks up to Janeway, who just entered the room. "Is it wise to bring Neelix with us? He has insufficient combat training."

"We won't be fighting anyone, Seven," Janeway says calmly.

"How do you know this?"

"We're going there to scan for Deuterium, as we can't pierce the magnetic field of the planet. We'll be in and out, no questions asked."

Janeway and Seven sit down at Chakotay's table, and they talk while Janeway and Chakotay eat from the stew reluctantly. Seven looks at it, puzzled.

"Do you truly choose this over ration bars, Captain?" she asks.

Janeway looks at Seven, not able to hide her smile anymore. "You know what, Chakotay? Seven has a point."

Janeway, Neelix, Chakotay and Seven get ready to step into the Delta Flyer.

"Good luck finding that Deuterium source, team!" Tom Paris says. "And..." he looks at Chakotay. "Take care of her for me?"

Seven looks at Janeway, searching her face for answers.

"He means the Deltaflyer."

"Of course I will," Chakotay reassures Tom Paris. He pats him on the shoulder and enters the flyer. Paris looks after them, a smile on his face but his eyes revealing worry. He is the best pilot after all, not Chakotay. But the commander has more experience dealing with pre-warp civilizations. He sighs and looks after them as they fly away.

They leave Voyager and fly into space, approaching the red and green planet of Janu.

"Isn't that pretty," Neelix gushes, looking ahead. "It's like the planet has two faces, one on each side with it's own color."

"We will be 100% undetectable with the Deltaflyer's improved camouflage," Janeway says.

Chakotay nods. "And we should be able to cruise through the magnetic field with our navigational deflector and coating. The corrosive effects of the field should keep to a minimum."

Seven and Janeway raise their eyebrows.

As they get closer to the planet, they enter the magnetic field. The shuttle begins to shake and they are hit by some space rubble.

"Shields at 80 percent," the computer voice says.

"Hold on, this will be a bumpy ride!" Chakotay says. Everyone grips their armrests.

"Shields at 40 percent," the computer says in the same steady tone as always. But the crew doesn't feel so steady. They bounce around the aircraft. The only one still in place is Chakotay, a crazed look in his eyes, mirroring his past when he was still with the Maquis.

Janeway slowly comes to. Her vision sharpens and she sees a wooden ceiling. Her head hurts. In fact, her entire body hurts. She slowly turns to look at her surroundings and sees someone sitting in a chair beside her. It's a Janurean.

"Oh no, the prime directive," Janeway thinks. But it's too late for that now.

"How are you feeling?" The Janurean asks.

"Like I've been hit by something big. But it seems you're taking good care of me."

The Janurean blushes and smiles. It's a young woman. "I'm taking care of you and your friends. You fell out of the sky. You must be our gods."

"Oh, no, not at all," Janeway says a bit too hasty. Because waking up, she doesn't have a good cover story yet. "We, ah, we got swept up by a mighty wind, and then we fell down, it's quite remarkable."

"How could the wind sweep up a house made of metal?" the woman says.

"I have no idea either," Janeway says. She sits up, rubbing her temple. The lack of morning coffee is becoming a real problem.

Janeway hears someone groaning. She turns around and sees her crew all in beds, clothed in Janurean robes. They are also waking up. No sign of their transponders or combadges.

"Where are our clothes?" She asks.

The woman looks at her apologetically. In a hushed voice, she says, "it's not safe to wear the clothes of the gods. We're protecting you here, but there are many who also saw the falling star. And they're looking for you."

"What do they want with us?" Chakotay chimes in.

"They think the falling of the gods means the end of time. Destroying you is the only way to save our world. I know, it's foolish and I don't believe it at all. It think you're here to enlighten us. And so does my family."

A small family enters through the doorway. A young male, an elderly person and two small kids. One shy, the other waving at them. Neelix winks at her. She laughs. "You look funny," she says. Neelix smiles.

"I'm very grateful you've tended to us, but I need to know where our clothes and things are, and where our... metal house is?"

"Oh, don't worry, we have hidden your house well. Nobody can find it. It's safe."

"I appreciate that," Janeway says, getting annoyed now, "but I still would like to know where it is."

"Please," the woman says. "Tell us about the skies? Teach us?"

Janeway and Chakotay look at each other.

"How do you feel?"

"I've been better," Chakotay jokes.

Seven eyes the windows and door of the room. She gets up. Her dress is brown and wavy. Janeway thinks it suits her better than the suit the Doctor gave her. Her hair is loose and falls over her shoulders. Seven shoots her a look. Janeway quickly looks back at Chakotay.

The Janureans huddle together in the doorway. "It's not safe to go outside," they urge Seven.

"Let's try to think of a plan first," Chakotay says.

"Let me through, I can take care of myself," Seven insists. She pushes past them and is out of sight.

Chakotay looks at Janeway like he blames her. Janeway ignores it.

Seven walks outside. It's early morning. Three moons grace the green sky. The house of their hosts stands in a small village. There are several shrines around, all portraying the moons. She scans the inscriptions. The shrines indeed tell the tale of the gods, that 'will come down again to bring forth the final Wisdom'. Nobody is outside yet but her. She resolutely walks over the village square, in a straight line towards the small alien forest beside it...

Janeway and Chakotay try various ways to get the family to give back their gear. But nothing seems to work: they don't respond to appeals to their ego, and will not be divided in any way. They just want to learn about the sky. Chakotay tells them some basic things that wouldn't further compromise the prime directive. Janeway looks distracted. They all have breakfast together, everyone except for Seven, who's still gone. Chakotay peers out of the windows. But Janeway just chows down on the food they've been given.

"Well, this is delicious!" Neelix breaks the tension. "What is this made of?"

One of the children says, "It's my favorite too! We add herbs from our garden to make it extra tasty."

"I would love to see that garden!" Neelix says, friendly. The child quickly finishes their meals and tugs on Neelix's arm. The mother says it's okay, as the garden is fenced. Nobody will be able to spot Neelix there. They walk into the garden.

"Wow, these flowers are beautiful."

"And tasty!" The kid says.

"I really like this place, it's so pretty! And your family so nice."

"Not everyone is nice," the kid says, face clouding over.

"Oh, yes I heard the people who want to capture me and my friends?"

"They are mean about that, yes. But they are always mean. They want to go back to how things were before."

"How were things before?"

"I don't know! I'm just a kid." Neelix smiles.

"But I do know where your stuff is! Come, follow me!"

Neelix follows the kid around a corner, and through a shrub, out of the garden.

"You know kid, sometimes you gotta look back in order to move forward. But forward you must go."

They walk to a shed behind the house.

"Here it is!"

Neelix opens the door of the shed, and puts their combadges into his pocket.

"YOU THERE!" An angry Janurean calls. He has a whole bunch of fierce looking friends behind him.

"I guess these are the mean people," Neelix says to the kid and they both run around the house, back inside.

"Where did you just come from?" The mom asks the kid.

"I just showed him their stuff..."

"That's dangerous!"

"But it's theirs!"

"Please, don't blame your kid, I shouldn't have let them out of the garden in the first place."

Neelix gives the combadges back to Janeway and Chakotay.

The angry mob bursts into the room.

"Give us the tri-moon gods!" their leader commands.

The young woman who tended to the Voyager crew, hisses. "Leave the gods be! They are here to teach us!"

"They are here to destroy us!"

Janeway stands up. Her injuries are still fresh, but her wit has fully returned. "We are neither gods, teachers nor destroyers. We are simply explorers from the other side of Janu. We just want to go back home-"

The angry Janureans attack and hit the elder Janurean.

"Leave them out of it!" Chakotay calls out and jumps into the fray.

Everyone is fighting, except for Neelix who hides under a table with the two kids.

Janeway jumps in front of a big Janurean that was about to hit the young woman. In stead, the blow lands on her head. She's out of a moment. When she comes to, the fight is still ongoing.

"Chakotay!"

"Captain, we have to retreat, there is no winning this..."

"Just stay behind me!"

"Surrender," their leader says. "And we will spare your life, for now."

Janeway looks the hostile alien in the eye. "No."

And at that exact time, Neelix, Chakotay and Janeway disappear.

"How did you know where the Delta Flyer was?" Chakotay asks Seven, who sits smugly at the helm.

"Irrelevant," she jokes.

"Seven used her Borg-skills to locate it," Janeway says, smiling into one corner of her mouth. "That is, she saw some bushes outside of the village and used her, very human, common sense." Seven smirks.

"How do you know that?" Chakotay asks.

"The Doctor installed a temporary mind-link in our cerebrum. This way, we could communicate, not that much unlike the Borg, and work together."

"It was highly effective," Seven adds. "Although," she pauses for a moment, looking at Janeway. "It was strange as well. I thought I would be more used to a shared mind, but I think... I like a bit of mystery."

Janeway, Chakotay and Neelix look at her, dumbfounded. Then everyone laughs. Except for Seven.

"And guess what?" Neelix says. And he shows a bag full of herbs from the planet. "We will eat Voyager birthday soup tomorrow!"

Chakotay and Janeway politely smile and thank Neelix. Seven raises her eyebrow.

"Captain," she says.

"What is it, Seven?"

"Why did you give all those replicated goods to the Janurean family?"

Janeway sighed. "I know we can't interfere with their lives too much, but at least they will be able to buy off their enemies for a while so they don't get more trouble. Didn't you get that through our link?"

"Your emotions often cloud your judgement and your thoughts become hard to read."

"I'm a human being, having emotions is part of the package deal. Besides, I feel your emotions as well."

Seven looks stoic, too stoic maybe.

"It is nice to understand each other for once, though."

#startrek #star trek #startrekwintergiftexchange #fanfic #janeway/seven #janeway #seven of nine #voyager #j7

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elizabethshaw · 24 days

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20 questions for writers

i was tagged by @riversofmars (thank you!!)... feel like a little bit of a fraud doing this as i've had major writer's block for nearly two years now and have written virtually nothing during that time, but i'm gonna give it a go anyway 😅

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

14 :))

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

46,344

3. What fandoms do you write for?

doctor who! mostly leaning towards dweu/big finish stuff but i've written some new who fic as well in the past. (i've also been wanting to write something for the pleasant green universe audio series for a while now but as my major fixations on it have all coincided with the aforementioned writer's block that... hasn't happened lmao)

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Wy' ti'n dal i weld cysgodion yn y nos? (67 kudos)

in it together (23 kudos)

The Security Guard, The Scholar, And The Giant Stone Cube (22 kudos)

I Lie Awake And Watch It All (19 kudos)

og um vitt aldrin síggjast meir (18 kudos)

predictably, this includes all of the new who fics i've written, and (bar the third) almost none of the fics i'm actually most proud of lol 😅

(also feel a need to clarify here that the foreign-language titled fics are not actually in those languages, i just use song lyrics as titles a lot and for various reasons over half the music i listen to at any given moment is Not In English, hence the titles being as they are)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

i try to! sometimes i'm a bit delayed with it (i know there's a couple i need to get around to answering rn but before today i hadn't been on my ao3 for... half a year at least?? so i'm a bit behind oops), but i like to get back to everyone who leaves a comment, just to say thanks :)

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

probably hver fer sinn veg - it's set during "the war doctor begins", it was never going to be a happy one lol

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

gei di weld y byd mewn lliw, i think :)

8. Do you get hate on fic?

thankfully no! i've been lucky enough that my experience with fic writing/sharing has been very positive so far <3

9. Do you write smut?

no, it's not really my thing. smut is very honestly just kinda there to me, i don't have strong feelings about it either way, and so it's not something i've ever felt compelled to write yknow??

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

nope! i mainly prefer playing around with canon/canon-adjacent stuff tbh, i've got a couple of unfinished aus hanging around that will probably never see the light of day, but no crossovers that i can think of

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not as far as i'm aware. though to be fair, i don't venture onto fic websites other than ao3 so i'll never know for certain. i doubt it though

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

again, not as far as i know! i'd probably be chill with it though if anyone wanted to translate a fic of mine, provided they asked beforehand and it was one i was comfortable with being translated :)

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

nope! the closest i've got is participating in an event run by a discord server i used to be mildly active in and am technically still part of, which was a lot of fun :D

14. What’s your all-time favourite ship?

i don't know if i really have an "all-time" favourite as such, but i've written a fair bit for liv and helen from the 8das, and really love their dynamic. i'm also a big fan of leela/romana, but for whatever reason i've never been quite able to make writing them work :/

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but probably won’t?

there's a fair few 😅 the main one I can think of atm is the eldritch helen fic i vaguely remember being asked about on here a couple of years back, it's a concept that i still have a lot of interest in and love for, but i've never quite been able to get the fic itself to work and i fear it may be doomed to the wip pit for eternity :((

i've also got quite a few unfinished pieces of varying lengths with the war-veklin-albert tardis team from "the war doctor begins" hanging around my drive that i'd a) love to finish and b) probably won't; their dynamic and their whole deal as a team whose story takes place mostly off-screen and which we only see the ending of fascinates me. maybe one day i'll manage to do something with it

16. What are your writing strengths?

description :) this is the one thing i am ever consistently happy with in my writing (i am my own harshest critic <3), and i've got a couple of nice comments about it before. so!

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

dialogue - even with characters i know well and whose voices i have clear in my head, i do find it difficult to make dialogue feel really authentic, and it's definitely something i tend to overly fixate on when i'm writing because i'm so conscious of wanting to get it right

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

i'm totally fine with it! as long as it has a reason for being in the story, and isn't like. getting in the way of readers understanding what's going on, i don't see the problem.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

doctor who :)

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

it's probably a tie between The Security Guard, The Scholar, And The Giant Stone Cube (a fic i wrote back in 2021 based on this post about rory and helen theoretically being able to meet each other at the national museum during the pandorica arc, which i loved writing and am still really happy with nearly 3 years later), and mae cuddio dagrau yn fy ngwaed (a bit of a weirder/darker dreamscape-type story; it took a lot of puzzling things out to piece all the different parts together to make something that was cohesive but still felt strange or off in the way dreams do, but i was really pleased with the end result!)

can't think of anyone to tag off the top of my head who hasn't been tagged already, so i'll leave this free for anyone to take part if they want to! :)

#tag game #thanks again for the tag!!#feels a bit odd posting about my writing on here as i don't do it all that often but this was fun!! nice looking back on everything :)

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corvidcall · 1 year

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Did you ever tell the story of why ******* kicked you out because she forgot to pick you up from work on here? I remember it happening in real time and it was not funny but in retrospect, it's 200 upvotes on reddit material lol

LMAO its so funny you censored her name. like shes gonna be here or something. cant let her know i still think shes a bitch!!!!!

anyway heres fun little anecdote about that time i was forced to move out, in the style of an aita post, fake names and all

AITA for being mad at my roommate for not driving my somewhere?

I (22nb) live with two roommates, Makenzie (22f) and Justin (19 trans m). We all met because we worked at the same place, and we've been living together for almost a year. Of the three of us, I'm the only one who has lived with roommates before, but I can't tell if I'm being TA here?

Makenzie is the only one of us who can drive, and she agreed when we moved in together that, if we gave her some money to buy her mom's car, then she would drive us places whenever she was able. I work a little over a mile away from our apartment, so I CAN walk, but since I get off work at around 9pm, and the sidewalks aren't really well-maintained (it's a really industrial part of town, so it's not GREAT for walking), she agreed that she would pick me up after work every day.

Last week, I got off work, and waited for her to show up, and she never came. I texted her a few times, and when she didn't respond after I'd been waiting for almost an hour, I texted that I would be walking home. Apparently, she'd fallen asleep, and midway through my walk home, she woke up, got in her car, and tried to come find me to drive me home. She couldn't find me (the sidewalk is really hard to see from the road, and it's extremely dark, so I'm not surprised), and then frantically tried to get a hold of me to make sure I wasn't dead. I didn't see her texts because I was 1. walking and 2. on the phone with my partner. When I got home, she was pissed that I made her worry. She thinks I did it on purpose to get revenge? I told her I was just busy, and she seemed to accept that, but today she and our other roommate sat me down and told me that I needed to find a new place to live, because "this wasn't working out."

According to her, I'm not entitled to a ride anywhere, so I had no right to be mad at her for not giving me a ride, and I certainly didn't have a right to make her think I was dead (I literally told her I was walking home??). She also brought up that I never do my chores on the chore wheel (she made the chore wheel without asking. She just announced that she'd made a chore wheel and I had to clean the living room, which I'm almost never in anyway) and that I owe her $200 (from when we adopted our cat, which I think is weird to bring up when you're trying to kick me out?? it's not like I'm gonna get to keep the cat). She's saying I'm entitled and inconsiderate, but I feel like she's punishing me for the fact that she flaked. AITA?

Edit: If it helps, she's flaked on rides before. A few months ago, she agreed to take me to the doctor, and then the day before my appointment, she told me she couldn't give me a ride. The reason she flaked was because she wanted to go to the weed dispensary instead :/ she said it was fine, because "your mom will just get you an uber anyway". My mom agreed to pay all my necessary expenses while I'm in school (I'm a full time student; she pays my rent and I use the money from my part time job to pay for my food) but she's not like. Rich. I don't feel good about just spending her money on stuff I don't have to.

UPDATE: Makenzie made a post on Facebook about how "it's so sad when someone would rather lose a friendship than admit they were wrong." I shouldn't have commented, but I did, asking her if she forgot we were facebook friends, and then I blocked her. In retrospect, I should have just blocked her without commenting, but I'm only human.

UPDATE 2: Well, I'm moving out. Justin started harassing me, accusing me of stealing his shampoo and letting the cat loose on purpose, neither of which I did. I have my own nicer shampoo, and I love cats (I just was asleep when he told me the cat was missing, because it was midnight and I wake up at 6 am to go to school. I guess the fact that I didn't immediately leap to my feet to find our cat means I wanted him dead???) Makenzie is refusing to give back my deposit, because she says she needs to have the carpets in my room professionally cleaned before a new roommate can move in. Why? Your guess is as good as mine. But I guess I'm willing to pay a couple hundred dollars to not deal with this anymore. Still, sucks. :/

#anime life #she only gave me like half of my deposit back :/#anyway their real names were madison and travis lol. sometimes i think about what happened and i get sooooo upset all over again #even though it literally doesnt matter #i dont even live in the same state as them anymore #honestly i think she and travis just resented me because i had the largest bedroom (even though i paid more in rent)#and they didnt think i worked as hard as them #they both had full time jobs and i had a part time job. but i was also a full time student!!!!!!!#i woke up at 6 am and when i worked i got back at 10 pm!!!!#but when i didnt work i was back home before either of them woke up.#so i guess to them my school time just. didnt count???#also they were mad i kept asking them to keep it down at night. even though they KNEW that i was going to need that when we all moved in #i dont know how many times i can tell a person that i have to be up at 6 so i can catch my bus to school #so i need them to be quiet after midnight #ALSO ALSO neither of them had ever had weed before we moved in together and then they both started smoking ALL THE TIME #and they were absolutely fucking intolerable after that #frankly if i didnt already think weed should be legal nationwide. this would have convinced me that no one should ever have it #sorry. it makes you too annoying.#long post

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deviantartdramahub · 7 months

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https://www.deviantart.com/comments/4/80757935/5070403795

Alright, today I'm talking about this thread to talk about this unfortunate encounter with this Probium person.

First things first, they intruded the conversation I was having with this Patchi person, who was fortunately way more kinder and understanding than the person I'm mainly talking about. But anyways, Probium for whatever reason thought our conversation was his business now, and entered to bring out their hatred. Also going "I don't intend to attack Club" *he says as he's attacking Club and immediately trying to get me to unfriend him* After I tried reasoning with him about how untrustworthy Club's harassers are, he spams me with two replies at once for some reason, the first one saying "I'm autistic (doctor-diagnosed). I don't RP with anyone, especially not including diaper fetish" Uhh okay I didn't ask, what does that have to do with anything?? I never said YOU were the bigoted one, you moron, and you're also further slandering Club by saying it's a fetish, so "I don't intend to attack Club" my ass. Then the other thing they said was "Why don't you look through it and analyse for yourself, and how do you know these are bigoted trolls? If I told you I was one of those people exposing him, AND I'm autistic (he claims to be autistic too), how would you feel?" Look through and analyse for myself? HONEY PLEASE, I've been a victim of theirs myself! I know damn well what's going on with those fuckers. Maybe don't assume I don't know shit when I do. And if you told me that I would be like "Okay I don't know you and you're admitting to contributing to the harassment of my friend?? Lol okay then ig get blocked." You want to pretend you're special, but you just invaded a conversation. You were never a friend, I won't treat you any different than I treat the other DADramaNow trolls, dear. Also it's a shame your contributing to ableism when you yourself have autism, tsk tsk.

They then wanted me to define bigoted and list reasons why I knew DADramaNow was that. So I did. I gave them a good list. And I'll admit the things about Tam was a misunderstanding. Though rather than talking about my reasons like a normal person, they simply brushed off ALL my reasons with a "no". Then proceeded to rant about Club. "In fact, I have reasons to believe Club is bigoted. Transgender woman named Eden Knight committed suicide knowing that she was sent to Saudi Arabia to possibly be executed? "Oh no! Anyway..." also, constantly shunning other people's stories and struggles to make way for his own to vent about his love for diaper 5yos and make the AUTISM excuse." Yeah now I definitely know the whole thing about "nOt InTeNdInG tO aTtAcK cLuB" is bullshit to try and look innocent. I'm not dumb or blind, honey. And explain to me how the living Hell that woman committing suicide should be blamed on Club??

Of course I was having NONE of this bullshit anymore. It was clear all this person wanted to do was slander my friend and didn't want to listen to a thing I said, Ig a sad attempt of manipulating me to get away from him? But that whole thing was just immature as fuck. I then cut ties with him there and blocked him after giving the final blow, bc there was absolutely no reason to continue dealing with that headache of a "conversation". Why bother trying to talk to someone if they're just gonna tune you out and only worry about what THEY think and what THEY have to say??

I honestly shouldn't even TRY to reason with people like this, yet I tried anyways. And look where that got me -_-

DADramaNow and their supporters don't want reason, they just want mindless slander.

The saddest part is people misunderstand how trust is supposed to work, and that gets us in this kind of situation.

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a-very-small-bluejay · 1 year

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Hi! It's 🐸 Frog anon! I was scrolling through and decided to come say hi and hope you're having a lovely week!

I read your post about yourself and may I just say YOU SIR HAVE IMPECCABLE TASTE!!! I adore sick fics too and hurt/comfort!!!!

I kinda wanted to ask your opinion on a random thing about that lol if you don't mind (only if you're comfortable! No pressure!) I don't know why but sick fics for me feel even more impactful when the character looking after the reader is like a doctor/healer/biologist kind of character! Like that makes me blush a lot XD

Like the whole "you're a well known and well liked doctor/healer character and you're choosing to look after my dumb cold instead of doing something like brain surgery???" AHHHHHH IT GETS ME EVERY TIME!!! and like when they use stuff like "eat that warm soup doctor's orders!"

"Stay in bed"

"Hold still, I'm taking your temperature"

AHHHHHHHHHHH

Anyways I'd love to hear about what makes sick fics impactful for you!

Just wanted to ask your opinion if you feel like talking about it!!!

Also blue is the best color! :)

Anyways! Sorry for bothering you just wanted to come by and chat for a bit! BUT YOU SIR ARE AN AMAZING PERSON WITH IMPECCABLE TASTE AND I WANTED YOU TO KNOW IT!!!!

OMG HOWDY!! Welcome back :D

I am completely cool with talking about why I enjoy sick fics so much, I love to talk about fic and the way different tags feel different ways and all that

For me, sick fics hit best when the reader is the kind of person who wouldn't ever normally ask for help. So you've got sick reader, who is completely out of commission, who always wants to do things completely on their own terms, and they're stuck accepting help because they're too sick to do things like make their own food on their own.

Especially when the character that's taking care of reader doesn't ask if reader needs help first, they don't even offer, they just kind of show up??? Top Notch right there.

I think the main reason that specific scenario hits hardest for me is because I don't like asking for help, so someone who just takes care of me without asking is the gd dream. Especially when the character is normally the type to not care about anyone, so on top of them taking care of reader it's also the "mean to everyone but you" trope like that's just so YUMMY it kills me every time

Also it's totally cool to drop questions like that anytime!! I really like the idea of being friends with the people who read my stuff,,, Also I will add that you ALSO have impeccable taste, because any kind of sick fic is top tier and the idea of the character taking care of reader being a doctor or something similar is freaking Adorable

(I will add here, though it is unrelated, that I am in fact working on requests today I just got sidetracked watching videos on youtube so the chapter that I post will probably be up pretty close to when I go to bed)

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whiskeyandwolfsbane · 2 years

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8/4 - 12:22PM

I gave up putting titles on these, I can never think of fun ones or even ones that make sense, lol..

I finally got my drains out today! Thank fuck for that. It was a pretty awkward experience - my mom was there, which was fine, but there were also three other people in addition to the one person who has handled all my pre-op appointments this far. Two nurses in training, and a floating nurse, or something like that.

Getting the drains out felt weird, hurt a bit, but stopped bothering me after less than two minutes. Then I got all the info on how to take care of scars, the dressing, etc. I was asked if I wanted to get a picture and I told them no - that was a lie, I did want to get a picture, but I already felt weird enough with so many people in the room so I balked.

I'll probably be able to get a picture later tonight or at my next appointment on the 11th at my next post-op at least, so I can get an idea of how my recovery is going physically.

I asked the main nurse after everyone left whether or not she could help me figure out this certificate my job wanted me to fill out. The paperwork for medical leave has been a fucking nightmare so I was relieved when she said she could help fill it out and then see about getting it to the surgeon, whose signature and what not was needed.

Now, I don't think I've mentioned the paperwork BS here, so let me try to do that as succinctly as possible.

I notified my job two months ago about this surgery and they told me to apply for paid medical leave. I was given a little bit of information that basically amounted to going to the government website to print out the form for the leave application.

I fill that out, but they won't accept emails, so I bring it to my local medical centre. They say it's the wrong paperwork and give me different paperwork to fill out. I hand that to them.

A week later, I get a response and the signature/doctor's note I needed. I go home and get that sent off to my job, and attached to my government claim.

Four days later, HR at my job emails me to tell me it's the wrong paperwork, and that I needed a DIFFERENT type of paperwork, which they attached. I looked that form up on the government website and found out the form that HR attached was outdated to boot.

So I print off the updated version from the government website, and when I can, bring it back to the local medical centre. They won't take it because "we no longer do those types of forms" because "it's unnecessary and the paperwork you filled out before should suffice".

They still won't let me email it. Eventually I'm told to just bring it in on my surgery date, and have the surgeon sign it there. I tried, but was told he couldn't do that, and that I would have to mail the form in for him to sign.

Today, that's what I was asking - either can you get this form to the surgeon or give me an address I can mail it to?

Anyway, the nurse fills out the info she needs to fill out, and tells us to hang on while she goes to see what she can do with it. She comes back, tells me the MAs have a copy of the form, and will figure out what to do with it, and that I can go to the front desk on my way out to see if they want to fax it, or make another copy, or whatever.

So we do that, only to have the person at the front desk tell me that they won't touch the form, until I fill out two OTHER forms. These ones being ones that I have already filled out.

I keep trying to explain that I already filled those forms out, and I don't know why they aren't in my files, but they're definitely already completed. And it's getting me nowhere, basically. I kept getting more and more irritable until I finally just took the papers, said thanks, and left.

I was pretty pissed off most of the drive home because I am just. So tired. this shit makes very little sense to begin with, and neither the state nor my job is making it any easier to deal with. I shouldn't have to be stressing about this type of stuff for so long not only before but also after a serious surgery.

My care worker called when I got home, the one who helps with a lot of my current medical stuff. I explained to him what was going on and he told me that hopefully the MAs will get it taken care of. But if they havent in a week, to let him know, and he'll personally try and get everything settled.

He also said that he's never once seen the state deny paid medical leave for someone who undergoes this surgery - so I'm hoping that it was just denied due to this missing form, and that once I attach it and reopen the claim, I'll get approved, but only time will tell, I suppose.

So yeah. I'm not having a great day mentally - all the stress just makes me more anxious, and when I'm anxious, it raises the chances of a depressive episode, and it sucks. I'm trying to just distract myself and not think much at all about anything.

Other than that, nothing much has been happening. Pain levels and itchiness have been mostly the same, maybe a little better. I can't wait to take a shower tonight now that I got the go ahead. I've mostly been sitting around sleeping, watching videos, or playing video games lately and that consists of most of my time, though I'm trying to start reading the many books I had stockpiled for this recovery period. I might be buying The Forest to play with other people soon, and a very kind new friend offered to buy me Sea of Thieves so that might be an upcoming game as well.

Besides all that, I guess just resting and trying not to lose my mind or get too in my thoughts is what I'll be up to for now.

(Oh, and the gaggle of nurses in the room earlier absolutely adored my new button up shirt - I bought a couple in preparation for surgery since you can't easily lift your hands above your head - which is black with a variety of cocktails on it, and the ingredients/recipe for those cocktails.

I found it by accident while looking for a shirt similar to Ash Williams' in the "Ash Vs The Evil Dead' television show and thought it was fun. So far it's been a hit - one nurse observed that she didn't think the picture for an old fashioned was correct, but I'm pretty sure she was accidentally looking at a different cocktail. Another asked if I was a mixologist, and I said no, but I wish I was, and she was like, ah, so an amateur mixologist or mixologist in training, something like that. One of them was talking about wanting to try a Tom Collins though and couldn't remember the third ingredient, which was club soda. So maybe I am an amateur mixologist. Or I just remember ingredients for alcoholic beverages really well, lol.)

#journal entries

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nathank77 · 13 days

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4/16/24

3:17 p.m Edited 3:44 p.m

Well If that Xanax was a placebo it knocked me on my ass. I told myself Left and right it was a placebo and there was no way it would work....

And christ I took it at like 4:15, was fighting my eyes by 5:25 and closed my eyes at 5:32 must have passed out by 6 a.m the latest. I mean I remember like 5 minutes of laying there and thinking and listening to King of The Hill.

I woke up at approximately 11:50 a.m..... I wanted to fall back to sleep but I was like if I sleep through this appt it's never going to be off my list of things to do. I must have gotten like 5 or 6 hours...

And funny thing is Disability didn't call me.... I called them and they patched me through they had my whole number correct, even on my paperwork..... but they were dialing 203 instead of 860 🙄🙄🙄

Who knows why that happened. My dad either isn't approved yet or they haven't received information that he has started receiving payment... but he put me on his Disability documents as a disabled minor which makes me happy. He wants me to get what I'm entitled to..

I am now protected as they put in a close out, for 6 months. I might be entitled to 12 months of back pay depending on if he gets approved... they wouldn't tell me when he applied but the close out protects me for 6 months. I might have to call in 6 months.

If he gets approved in the next 6 months, I'll get a letter saying he did and we need to file an application. So I mean it feels a little pointless bc he isn't approved yet or they don't have the information yet but the close out protects me so that isn't worthless.

If it's a year I get almost 6k! I mean idk when he filed. I'm just glad he put me as a disabled minor. He totally knows I'm on disability and he still loves me. Even though we never talked about it.

I just need to call Disability frequently and ask.. and wait for the close out. I could ask my Dad but I don't want to bc I don't want to call him about money. I want to call him and connect with him. Idc about the money. I'm never going to ask about his Disability status. Ever. But yea it wasn't a complete waste.

Anyways now I'm at my emissions test. Hopefully this is quick bc I have Quest at 4:40... I want to stop at My Eye Doctor in Torrington and check out the glasses with my extra time and check out the frames and the cost of just lenses in a frame I already have. They are one of the only places that clean their glasses after customers put them on......

My actual Eye Doctor office doesn't... nor does another local place. And I don't want to create a big stink but I expect them to do it... bjs does...

If I have the time after that I guess I'll call a few glasses places nearby and get estimates on lense replacements... before Quest. Then everything shuts down lol

My ent called me and they got all my records so that's done! FINALLY!

I wish I could wake up early everyday I got scheduled for my dentist appt for the end of May.. and I got my ultrasound rescheduled to April 30th at 4 p.m.. I said politely the time absolutely does matter unfortunately. I cannot do earlier than 4 p.m.

After quest I got to go to Walmart and stop and shop.... I'm scared to go to Walmart bc I need waters and I tried to call Dan today cause I had so much time and Steve the cunt picked up as the only manger on staff. I just asked when Dan would be in and said I'd call back...

I'm going to try to get waters and if they kick me out. That's fucked but I won't be considered gravely ill thats for sure.

They called me for my mri for my arm. They are doing a 30 day appeal instead of an expedited one... but that's in the works... I have a feeling they won't approve it.

My HSV2 test still hasn't come back... it's been a week. I got there late and they said it had to sit out for 30 minutes... part of me thinks they didn't leave it out for 30 minutes bc of the time I got there and they can't do the test..... I got to say something to Quest today when I go in... cause a week is overkill... I'll be there on time today.

The month of May is filling up with doctors appts already... and I called my endo about tepezza and pushing through the ambulatory order so I can see the doctor sooner than September. I told them about my heart palpitations... and the er and Quest today... I also haven't started that Atorvastatin but I didn't tell them that. I'll start it eventually but I don't want to.... for a while... bc of the muscle spasms.. but eventually I will. I'm still on CoQ10.

The Xanax is kicking my ass, I still feel it. If it's a placebo and knowing it's a placebo doesn't matter it's fucking powerful, thats all I got to say.

If I didn't have circadian rhythm disorder, I could accomplish 90% of my to-do list in 3 days. It's ridiculous. I just wish I wasn't so fucking tired.

I'm glad I forced myself awake.. Even if I feel dead.

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marcholasmoth · 8 months

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OSRR: 3311

i went to the doctor today to check up on my shoulder and i got the official all clear and "come back as needed" so i'm happy to say that my shoulder is good now 💪

considering i completely forgot about the appointment, we took that as a good sign too lol

i got to come home today! i got to sit and ask mom about how to handle the sexism in the IT department and what she would do and how to approach it next time it happens because it will because people are predictable and sexist and basically i'll say "i am GSOC, this is what GSOC is saying, and you don't need anyone else's opinion." something like that or "of course i'm certain you'd like to explain to the VP of HR why i, a global security analyst, am neither believed nor trusted to give correct information on a subject that i brought to you to fix, im sure that would be fine and you would totally keep your job."

basically it's "fuck you, i'll get you fired" in corporate. which sounds like fun. i just need to channel my inner linda.

for dinner we had stir fry which was surprisingly good despite it being the first time making it in the house. mom was nervous and so was i lol so chelsea walked us through it and it was fine lmao

rip

anyway, i'm tired and tired and i was sad earlier because i was reminded of my path to get where i am and the line from taylor swift's song "this is me trying" that goes "they told me all of my cages were mental,/ so i got wasted like all my potential" and i felt that on a spiritual level as i have from day one bc rip me ig

anyway it's time for sleeping because i have a lot to do tomorrow

but also one or two last things:

1) my mom is praying for me to come back to church. i'm amazed that i can sit and listen to her talk without getting a panic attack or something. she's so wrong on so many levels and has made so many assumptions about me and my experiences, and has basically discounted everything that i've told her about my experiences as something that's "not perceived correctly." and i'm like "bitch?? how tf am i supposed to perceive it???" that shit is HOSTILE and i'm not about that. if someone 'needs' me or even if the whole goddamn room 'needs' me, that's still not a good enough reason for me to be there. count me the fuck out.

2) joel has been super duper sweet to me lately. on sunday we talked about us moving together and it made me happy and i got us lunch today and before anything happened he just texted me "love you <3" and it made me so happy?? like he thinks of me so much and he considers how i feel and he values my opinions and what i think and he listens and he is so good to me. i'm so happy he is exactly who he is because he's a good man and i'm happy i have him in my life. i love him so much. i'm happy.

#molly rambles #operation srr #osrr #3000s #3300s #sunshine boy

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mothlegs · 9 months

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yelling abt meeting i had with my psych nurse today, mostly talks about selfharm so be warned

Learns of The Day:

my nurse is stupid

my nurse does not know things

my nurse is not to be trusted (should already know this)

i selfharm more than i thought

my mom was with, beloved mother who is able to speak for me and translate the things i say. my nurse isn't great at english and i'm mildly shit at my native language (thanks dropping out of school to live on the internet) so there are Some language barriers, and i'm generally also just shit as saying what i want to say, especially with people i don't know well

so! my mom did most of the talking and she did great, much progress, thank you mother

i already forgot how the topic came up, but she starts asking about selfharm? and i'm like. genuinely i do not know how often i remember very little about it. and my mom then says it's At Least weekly because she sees on my arms??? and i'm like. wot i had no idea. and then she mentions scratches and bruises and i internally go ohhh right yeah scratches is a near daily thing huh. idk about bruises though, i don't remember that much either. but idk i feel kinda stupid for not realising cause i'm very Self-Harm Is Many Things And Not All Are Physically Visible kinda stuff cause it's important to me non-scarring forms of selfharm arent minimised or looked over. yet i completely looked over when it happens with myself

but then nurse asks about what i use to hurt myself??? and i'm like. =_= why? and she just keeps asking and not really giving an answer, saying something about how it helps her to know how i'm doing which? complete bullshit lol? and eventually i get her to say that yeah maybe they would try to take my tools. so i just like. yeah i'm not telling you lol get fucked

when we get home my mom's talking to my grandma about it and she said she felt like she almost had to defend my self-harm to my nurse and like say it's ok??? genuinely love to my mom i appreciate her so much, and she's self-harmed too when she was younger so she Gets It she actually understands it and what i need. she also mentioned how it would do no good, and how she has done really dangerous things to hurt herself like using things she found on the sidewalk- i wouldn't go that dangerous but i Have done dangerous things that risked getting pieces into wounds so like. yeah. my mom is good ok

ALSO JUST. i luckily have never had my tools taken but i thought they'd taken them once and i had a major breakdown. as in major major breakdown, and the second i found them i was ok. so like. lmfao y'all ain't trying to help me fucking bullshit

so anyways i'm not getting meds but she's gonna ask the doctor (who is stupid and i hate her) about re-evaluating me Again after i'd ALREADY BEEN TOLD I WOULD BE RE-EVALUATED god shit like this keeps happening. one person will tell me i'll get a thing and then i will be patient but eventually ask about it and then a new person will say they have to ask someone if i can have the thing and then that takes literal months. happened with therapy too and i still haven't heard anything about it

oh and my mom told me to write a thing explaining my plurality cause i can't really explain it to my nurse, very complicated and i struggled to explain it in private to my mom too so definitely wouldn't be able to with my nurse. i still don't know how accepting my mom is? but she gets some of it, i think

OH GOD AND MY NURSE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT DISSOCIATION IS. SHE LITERALLY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT DISSOCIATION IS. WHAT i'm going to have to explain dissociation and dpdr and ifs to her jfc she is literally working at a psychiatric facility, there is a psych ward where she works, psychiatric evaluations are made there, AND SHE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT DISSOCIATION IS ???

so yeah she stupid don't know shit never to be trusted

rest of my day was good though i got a slushie at the mall and we bought makeup?? i dont know how that really happened but i guess i might learn to do eye makeup now. maybe

#mothicaws

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fizzingwizard · 9 months

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Had to go home today and see the ear doctor. Don't read on if squeamish haha

I'd been having some ear achey-ness in one ear for about a week, but since last night, it suddenly felt like a full blown ear infection, like I haven't had since I was a kid. But since I work with little kids, I tend to catch little kid colds and stuff more often than most adults. (I've built up immunity and don't get them as bad as I used to, but there's always something new and wonderful going around 9_9)

I had to go into work this morning, because I messed up last week due to a miscommunication. It was the same thing as when I had covid: my boss said "until Thursday" meaning I should come back to work on Friday, but to me "until Thursday" meant I should come in on Thursday. This time she told me something was due on the 31st, which I took to mean by the end of the day on the 31st. But she actually meant it was due before the 31st... From now on I'm gonna ask more questions whenever words like "until" or "by" are used

Anyway, I was able to get it done pretty quick, because my head was killing me and I couldn't hear much of anything out of the one ear. So I went home and went to the ear doctor. He took pics and my goodness. One ear was pristine. The other... soooo much wax build up. Not only was there a lot, but it was a weird color, and the texture was different - I usually have kind of dry, orangey wax, and this was dark and slimy. (see I told you don't read if squeamish!)

I've never experienced this before in my life. The doctor started cleaning my ear with these long sticks, and using this suction thing like the dentist uses (though not quite as strong, thankfully). I don't know if I can say it was painful, but it sure was uncomfortable. And I don't know why, but it made me light-headed! I actually got nauseous. The doc asked what as wrong and I was too dizzy to think in Japanese, so instead of saying "I'm dizzy," I said "My head is light." Which isn't the most common way to express it here, but it got the point across, and they had me lie down on a cot with a funnel in my ear that dripped water in to loosen the wax x'D

After that fortunately the rest went pretty easily. The doctor was this twitchy, happy guy who couldn't stop talking. I liked him though. The nurse was also nice but seemed really anxious for some reason. But idk, she calmed down, or I guess maybe she didn't understand why I was acting weird until she took my blood pressure and realized it was low, and then focused on just not letting me fall over lol

(I don't know with the low blood pressure. Although my guess is I was dehydrated because I rushed around in the morning and didn't eat and only drank a little water. Plus it's really hot. But I do get light-headed like everytime the temperature changes x'D I have debated whether I should talk to a doctor about it. It doesn't really impede my life, but it has made it hard for me to get serious about hiking and stuff. I love hiking, but I tend to feel exhausted long before my muscles hurt, and it's really inconvenient to be nauseous on a mountain. ETA: I looked up about feeling faint when cleaning ears, and there was a mention that the suction tool can change the temperature inside the ear canal suddenly, which can result in dizziness and faintness. So that's that solved :P Woulda been nice if the doctor had warned me tho...)

I asked before I left what caused so much wax, because I really don't wanna do this again :P It wasn't painful, but it still sucked, ya know? They wouldn't really confirm, like usual, the doctors always just want you gone once you're fixed up... but hopefully that means it's not anything serious. I asked if I need to clean better, but I was confused why it only happened in one ear when I treat them both the same. But looking online, it sounds like that can happen if the inner ears are shaped differently, or if you sleep more on one side. I am a side sleeper but I'm not sure if I favor my right side. I don't think I do. Anyway... Idk, will just be more careful about cleaning my right ear from now on I guess XP

Eventful morning... At least I get to be home for the afternoon now. What's funny is last night I watched a video about Ouchi Hisashi, who was a victim of the criticality event in Tokaimura. What he endured was unimaginably horrific. Sitting there getting my ear cleaned, I hated it so much that I started reminding myself "Remember what Hisashi went through. This is nothing..." Yup I'm a wimp

#fizz's life

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aguisss · 1 year

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WELCOMEEE

Hey guys! Welcome to my blog!

Here I will introduce myself and talk bout a little bit bout me.

Ok, so…I'm a 15-year-old gurl who was born May 11, 2007, on a terrible night, the worst one, freezing. But at the same time a beautiful day, the best one… I know this is a wonderful day for my parents cause I came to this world. I had a pretty good childhood and a big, I think, one of the universe's coolest and most giant imaginations. When I was a tiny bean, just learning to walk, I felt people couldn't walk without shoes. Actually…I'm not joking. I know this is the stupidest thing u will ever listen LOL! but I was that silly and innocent gurl, hehehehhe. Anyway, I also took out the soil from the plants and ate it. Don't blame me; I thought it was chocolate.

I liked school in those times when we only played with play-doh, and the subjects were fun. I know, I don't need to remember how weird I was. The most innocent kid in the territory n odd as f***. By the way, with the years, I started realizing how bad n good life is, bcause it needs to be balanced in some way. I'm practically a chill gurl with any situation that comes, I'm prepared, but at the same time, I stress a lot. I think the world will end when something I care so much about does not work out, but I can control it. Many people said I'm a clever girl, friendly, extrovert, independent, and very sarcastic, hahahaha. I'm not gonna lie; I'm sarcastic, more than u will ever imagine, really….I use sarcasm daily with my parents, friends, and siblings. I'm always one of the most sarcastic people in the world. Anyway, I would like to study medicine at a good college in the future. u r asking why? The answer is really easy, my dad is a doctor, and he always showed me medicine cases or the anatomy of the body, etc., since I was a little girl. So basically, I grew up with medicine in my veins, and I also love the fact of saving people. I know doctors can't make them immortal, but they extend their lives to enjoy it a little more. Also, it is interesting what we are made of... the organs; anyway, I will not continue; maybe this is disgusting. LOL. For now, at 15 years old, I want to keep the good grades and have an excellent academic experience this three years that are left. I am trying to recover from my knee injury and this is one thing that matters to me. More grown up, talking about family, I'm not interested in having kids or getting married. I want to enjoy my young life, having my dream job in New York, hopefully, with an excellent economic status…. enough to visit other places like Italy. I want to work out to have a healthy lifestyle, for example, going to the gym, eating healthy, and enjoying all types of food. I want an apartment with my dog, a husky, btw. I want to go out with friends and have adventures before getting married and having a family. I think there is so much to appreciate alone and fall in love with ur own life.

that's it for today hope u like it!

xoxo

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heyboke · 4 years

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SWIPED RIGHT! | Kageyama Tobio x Reader SMAU

0:10 — Pinky Promise and...

NOTE: I understand if some of my readers only prefer the SMAU part, so I made this update flexible so you can still get what’s happening without reading the writing part! Keep in mind that you still have to click on ‘Keep Reading’ to access the following photos!

But, some of the parts can’t be translated through social media screenshots so reading the writing part will really help you understand the characters and what’s happening to the story on a deeper level! ☻

Word Count: 3344 words

YOUR POV

After concluding Bokuto-senpai's non-stop blabbering about the movie he watched last night to procrastinate from studying, the boys were finally able to go to their locker room to freshen up for their long-awaited BBQ Friday.

I decided to wait for them on the bench just outside the gym. Their four hour training went by so fast that when I looked up at the sky, the stars were already twinkling. The cool breeze I only get to enjoy at night hugged my skin as the winds started to lightly gust against my bare sleeves. Ugh, I forgot to bring a hoodie with me tonight.

My thoughts were interrupted as I received Tobio-kun's very random text. It was a very pleasant surprise that unconsciously plastered a huge smile on my face. I was too busy texting him that I didn't even notice the whole team standing in front of me, all ready to go.

"What's that on your phone that's making you grin like the Grinch?" Akaashi asked, trying to subtly take a peek on my phone screen. I immediately locked the device and put it inside the pocket of my sweatpants.

"No need to peek, Akaashi! Let's not waste anymore time... let's go!" I said, jumping out of the bench as the whole team started to walk, carrying on with their small talks.

The gray haired captain stood out since he was ahead of everyone, hopping like a kangaroo while shrieking about how he's been craving for Barbecue for so long now and that he can't believe he finally got the blue check on Twitter.

I was walking alongside Akaashi at the far end side of the group, watching everyone ahead of us with a comfortable silence lingering between us.

"Do you need help with your bag? I can carry it for you." He asked, breaking the silence.

"It's fine, it's fine! I can carry it on my own. Besides, you've already had such a long training. I don't want to burden you with such a small thing." I said, smiling at him to assure him that it's fine.

"Oh, speaking of my bag... hold up," I muttered, stopping on my tracks as I opened my bag to get something.

"What's up?" Akaashi uttered his third question since I saw him outside of the gym. I shuffled through my things until I finally found what I was looking for.

"Aha! Here. I got it while y’all were doing your spiking drills." I said, handing him a slightly chilled bottle of Vanilla protein shake.

"Oh. Thanks, Y/N. It's been a while since you gave me something as boujee as a protein shake. Hmm, someone's loaded today." Akaashi teased, a small smile smothering his gorgeous face. It is an unsaid arrangement between the both of us that I can only give something a little fancy to him, or to anyone, when I have extra savings with me.

"Shut up! I've been saving up for tomorrow for quite some time now. Just... shut up and be grateful for that, Keiji." I said, chuckling as I playfully hit his arm.

"Why? What's so special about tomorrow?" he asked, eyebrows scrunching up together in curiosity.

"Didn't I tell you? To—"

"WE'RE FINALLY HERE!! YAAAY!!!" Bokuto hollered, cutting me off from telling Akaashi about my plans with Tobio-kun, Hinata-kun and my bestfriends for tomorrow. The familiar aroma of savory and mouthwatering meat being grilled, instantly filled my nostrils. I just realized that I've been distracting myself from how hungry I actually am all this time.

"God, I'm so hungry. Y'all were taking so long. If I wasn't on such a good mood, I would've been so hangry by now!" I said, eyes locked on the grilling area on the side of the restaurant where the Barbecue we've been dying to eat is being prepped.

Good thing, Bokuto-senpai already reserved a table for us ahead of time. The short list of things that the simple-minded captain would not procrastinate on would certainly include Volleyball and his favorite food, Barbecue.

Everyone decided to sit down on their desired seat. I felt comfortable sitting at the very far end of the booth’s couch. Since Akaashi and I were already walking side by side, it made sense that he just sat beside me on the couch too.

The rest of the team, and most likely even me, were practically drooling at the sight of barbecue being served to the tables around us. Yukie-san, one of the current managers of the team, is known for her great love for food. She decided to take matters in to her own hands and stood up for everyone. She simply asked one of the servers to follow up our orders.

Some of the third years, Konoha-san, Komi-san and Sarukui-san, were struggling to deal with an impatient Bokuto that was on the verge of going on emo mode.

“Where’s Akaashi? Didn’t he...“ the captain mumbled, pouting as he searched for the setter that was seated beside me.

“Oh, no. Bokuto-san’s Weakness #42. He becomes impractically impatient when people make him wait for his food, most especially when he’s hungry after training.” I hear Akaashi mutter beside me. I looked at him and he seems like Doctor Strange, looking at and calculating the different possibilities of what can happen if the captain won’t be able to get his food anytime soon.

Thankfully, Yukie-san came back to our table with at least two servers holding stacks of Barbecue on their trays, gently placing them on the table in front of all of us. Bokuto-senpai’s eyes lit up, even his hair seemed to perk up in excitement as he saw the Barbecue he’s been dying to eat being served in front of him.

“ALRIGHT, Let’s dig in!! This is in honor of me getting the blue check and a reward for all of us after such a hard training!! WOOHOOO!! Enjoy, everyone!!” the captain cheered, taking at least five chunks of meat in his chopsticks and munching the all down in one go.

No matter how hungry I am, I took the time to look at the team in front of me. The mere sight of them enjoying their food is endearing me. Am I really going to be a part of this wonderful team by next week? Do I really belong here?

I snapped out of my thoughts when I saw green vegetables being plopped down on my plate. I looked up and saw Akaashi putting one last piece of greens on my plate.

“Hey, why are you putting all that? I came here for Barbecue and not vegetables, Keiji.” I mocked him, poking the vegetables he just placed on my plate with my own chopsticks.

“Shush, you have to eat those. Even just a couple. They make you healthier. Plus, if you’re going to be our manager, you can’t be getting sick and frail.” he said, not even sparing a glance at me as he started to eat his own food.

Now this... this is one of his gestures that made me grow really fond of him. Some people might think otherwise but for me, Akaashi is not shy at all. Others often mistake his silence as shyness. When in reality, he only speaks up when he thinks it’s necessary — when he thinks it’s worth it. In fact, he is very frank with his words. He’s the type of person that would call you out when you’re doing something wrong, but he’d also compliment you when you’re doing something right. If one tends to focus more on his expressions, they can be convinced that he’s bland because his face really is usually blank. He only ever shows what he feels through his expressions at very rare occasions. Thus, he shows his feelings most of the time through his gestures; be it a small one or a big one.

“Hmph, fine. I’ll just eat more barbecue with it, so I don’t taste it that much.” I said, wrapping the greens with a chunk of meat. Bokuto-senpai, who’s instantly uplifted by now, overheard what I said.

“That’s what I do too when I need to eat vegetables!!! You’re doing the right thing, Y/N!!” he laughed, as he stuffed more barbecue inside of his mouth. The other third years that were worked up on not letting him slip in to his emo mode earlier, were now having the time of their life beside Bokuto-senpai, laughing at each other as they throw jokes at one another from time to time.

“Y/N?” said someone from in front of me. I looked up and saw that the voice belongs to none other than, Kaori-san, the other current manager of the team. She’s so pretty, oh my gosh.

“H-Hello, Kaori-san. Is there anything I could help you with?” I asked, getting a little conscious about the fact that I’m basically eating like a pig in front of someone so gorgeous.

“Oh, nothing! I just wanted to talk to you, even just for a little bit.” She smiled, eating gracefully like a princess. I could never, lol.

“I’m always down for a talk with you, Kaori-san!!” I gushed. Oh my god, do I sound a little too excited? What if she thinks I’m a crazy fangirl? Oh no.

“You’re so cute! Hahaha, anyway, I’d love to hear your thoughts right now about the team manager position because I’d be really be at ease knowing that the team is in good hands after Yukie-san and I graduate.” She said, a hint of sadness was evident after she mentioned the fact that they’re graduating this year.

“Oh, of course... Hm, before I even officially become the manager of this team, I can say that I already have a pretty good bond with them... thanks to this one person,” I nudged Akaashi who was peacefully eating beside me and secretly listening to Kaori-san and I’s conversation. Akaashi-kun, you’re not so slick. I might’ve only known you for a little over three months now, but I can feel it when your ears are trying to listen, despite having your eyes focused on something else.

I continued, “I just know that they have something really special about them. At times, I even get intimidated by their bond because not all teams can easily earn it. It takes a lot of time and everyone’s cooperation as well. With that being said, I just want to make sure that I won’t get in their way or anything. I really am taking things seriously and I’ve also been thinking about it a lot lately. I don’t want to make a hasty decision just because I got blinded with such a big opportunity. It’s a commitment that we’re talking about, not just to myself, but to the rest of the team as well.”

I didn’t even realize that I’ve been blabbering like a little kid in front of Kaori-san.

“The fact that you’re thinking about it this much already says a lot, Y/N. Hell, I didn’t even know it’s possible for me to want you to take this position even more!” she chuckled.

“Your words mean a lot to me, Kaori-san! I’ll make sure to keep it in mind once I make my final decision.” I smiled, stuffing my mouth with one of the green vegetables on my plate and Barbecue.

The warmth and liveliness around the table never died down all through out the meal. We even found the gray-haired captain standing up and doing an imitation of this one funny video he watched as a kid. The trays and plates on the table were now empty, while our stomachs were full and satisfied.

“HEY, HEY, HEY!!! Let’s go to arcade now!! Yoohoo!!” Bokuto-senpai started to hop around while flailing his arms in the air, ready to go to this arcade nearby this restaurant. He was so close to leaving the doorway when one of the servers came up to our table.

“Uhm, ma’am and sir, I double checked it on the system but... you haven’t paid for your meals yet,” the server was sheepish on approaching us. She was having a hard time looking at us in the eyes. She’s probably new here.

Everyone stood there in shock and embarrassment, except for Konoha-san and Komi-san who dragged Bokuto-san back inside to pay for our meals.

“OH... I’m so sorry!! I forgot, I didn’t mean to not pay!!” the captain sincerely apologized, quickly paying for everything we ate.

Upon entering the arcade, I couldn’t help but feel giddy and excited. The air inside the arcade just makes me feel alive and want to play games there all day. People around our age and some kids filled the place. Some of them are on dates, while most of them were just hanging out with each other.

The team scattered into groups as they went to the games that best fit their liking. The captain can be seen inside a Zombie-killing booth. His hands are already holding the fake gun inside, ready to unleash his inner warrior because according to him, he always trained himself for an apocalypse that can happen in the future. Some of the third years, like Yukie-san and Kaori-san along with some of the spikers, can be seen on the bowling area.

I rushed to the counter in the middle to get myself tokens and cards to play the games. The air hockey table caught my attention the moment we stepped in the arcade. I was about to swipe my card to play, when I realized I didn’t have anyone to play it with. How much dumber can I get? I obviously can’t play this by myself.

“Go for it. I’ll play with you,” a voice I know too well spoke behind me. I didn’t realize that I kind of ditched him as soon as I got too caught up in excitement with the arcade.

“Okay. Bring it on, Keiji! Don’t you dare go easy on me!” I exclaimed, swiping the card and grabbing the air hockey paddle on the table. My competitive side was showing as I poured my energy in each stride at the puck and attempts to block it from shooting inside my side of the goal.

After a few rounds of air hockey and a little bit of Basketball, where I took a hard L because I was against a well-trained and balanced athlete that shot the ball like it was nothing, I decided to go for a game where I thought I had a bigger shot at winning. I scanned through the games again and my eyes landed on this one game that I knew I’d win against someone like Akaashi.

“Dance Dance Revolution? I never played this game all my life and now you’re asking me to play it with you right now?” he whined, uneasiness showing as he spoke. I felt a little sad, but I didn’t want him to force him on doing something he doesn’t want to do.

“Hey, it’s okay if you don’t want to do it. I just really thought it’d be nice to play this with somebody.” I looked down, speaking softly. I hear him take a deep breathe.

“Fine... just one round.” he said. I was so thrilled. I bounced around and swiped my card on the machine. We stepped on the dancing area with the arrows under our feet and got ready to play the game. I chose a dance that was moderately difficult, keeping in mind that by doing so, I’ll increase my chances of winning. It was going really well at first. By looking at Keiji on my peripheral vision, he wasn’t even that bad. I guess the footwork training they do on Volleyball also helps him. Ugh, is there something he can actually suck at?

The most complex part of the dance started and I was slowly panicking. My score was higher, but only by a little. I was getting lost in the game that I didn’t even notice that I stepped at a faulty angle and twisted my ankle.

I winced in pain as I lost my balance and held on the metal bar behind me for support. Akaashi was alarmed as soon as he saw my current state.

“Hey, I’m fine, really. What’s that look on your face, Akaashi?” My poor attempt to chuckle was horrible. I tried to stand up, but the pain I felt on my ankles were stronger than my will to prove Akaashi that I was fine. He rapidly moved away from the game and found himself beside me, checking my, most likely, sprained ankle.

“Okay, it doesn’t look that bad but you can’t work yourself up for a while. I’ll take you home. No more ifs and buts. I’ll just text Bokuto-san and the rest of the team about what happened and that we had to leave sooner than expected.” he sternly said.

The next thing I knew, he was walking me to my house. I found myself on his back, arms wrapped around his chest and legs clung on his waist as he held the side of my thighs for extra support.

The same stars that greeted me while I was waiting for them outside the gym earlier were present as I looked up again at the sky. With that, the same cold breeze of the night blew against my skin. I tried not to shiver, but it was useless since Akaashi felt that I was getting chilly because I was shaking a little.

He stopped on his tracks as he gently put me down on the sidewalk. I was feeling confused until I saw him taking his jacket off and offered me to take it.

“I noticed you were starting to get a little chilly, so here. Take it.” he said. I didn’t even hesitate anymore as I wore his jacket. I felt so much better and we started walking again while he gave me a piggyback ride.

I let out a yawn as I started to feel my eyelids getting heavier and my breathing going slower. I didn’t even know when it happened, but I just know that along the way, I fell asleep on his shoulders.

AKAASHI’S POV

I found myself in front of your house and I knocked on the door. It wasn’t the first time I’ve been here, so your mom let me in as soon as she saw me. I told her about what happened and gave her some tips that will help you recover faster. Given that I was not new to these injuries, I knew exactly what to do.

I opened the door to your room and I softly put you down on your bed. I got some pillows that will help on elevating your sprained ankle and tucked you to bed.

You looked so peaceful. You looked so beautiful.

I’ve always been blunt about what I see and feel about everything. So, why is it that I can’t tell you about these feelings that I feel solely for you?

I wish I can tell you that all your little gifts and efforts for me never go unappreciated.

I know that you’ve recently been growing closer to somebody else. I’m not oblivious about it. I know you, Y/N.

I just hope that it’s not too late by the time I finally build up the courage to tell you about these feelings.

I gave your forehead a soft kiss, before I finally got up and left your room.

YOUR POV

I woke up in the middle of the night and realized that I was already in the comfort of my own room. I checked my phone and saw that it was 2AM. I looked down on my feet and saw that my ankle was really sprained and that I wasn’t just dreaming about it.

I let out a sigh as I remember that Tobio-kun, Hinata-kun, Best Boy Yams and Saltyshima were coming over here later.

Why the fuck did I have to sprain my ankles on the worst day possible?

☆ PARTS ☆

A/N: Here goes my first actual write up in this blog! I would really love to hear your thoughts about it! Stay safe and healthy, lovelies! ♡

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