Thinking thoughts abt capitanos wifey who knows exactly what she does to childe. She keeps pushing his buttons just to see how long it'll take him to just jump her. All it takes is a well timed pet name, an innocent touch, or the tiniest bit of praise to get him all hard and horny :( Even though he can hardly hide his raging boner he tries anyway, not that it escapes her attention ofc, but he doesn't have to know that. Just capitanos lil wifey who sees exactly what she does to poor childe and hides it under a mask of perfect innocence <3
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HELLO BEE! long time no see ;; and you're back with some delicious hot things <3
i had actually hinted it in the last works about horny gross childe and i was really curious if anyone noticed it. also i'm very sorry but i might have written a bit too much of my housewifey fantasy into this </3
f!reader, tiny bit of smut but not really? just a few mentions and generally childe being horny, reader is heavily implied to be chubby
the thing is, since you're literally the definition of cute fluffy darling wifey among all these big strong men, a literal lamb among wolves, so people generally either dismiss you or overlook you. sure they respect you as the wife of the general of the snezhnayan army, one of the most terrifying men in the world but you're still viewed as a harmless little thing, too oblivious for her own good.
and well, they're not entirely wrong. sure you're no fighter, you have no combat training in any way; your darling husband promised you on your wedding night as you two lied panting and gasping for air that your soft hands would never have to touch the rough handle of a weapon as long as he was standing, as it was his duty to protect you from any harm.
and yet they all seemed to overlook the little vixen that you are, all seemingly innocent smiles and doe eyed looks; and to be perfectly honest you were all of that. you didn't have a single malicious bone in your body and couldn't bring yourself to cause harm to anything. you liked the domestic feeling of baking and cooking and taking care of the mansion with the help of multiple servants and helpers who became your friends after their initial fear of you dissolved.
unfortunately your loving husband still had his duties and had to attend to them, that led to weeks of being parted from you and out in either the battlefield or on various missions assigned from Her Majesty and in such a big house it could get very lonely, various domestic distractions could distract you only so much...
luckily there still was childe! the cheeky 11th fatui harbinger, your husband's coworker and a royal pain in the ass, capitano's words not yours.
ever since he quite accidentally got introduced to you during a grand ball in zapolyarny palace that you and your husband attended he became a sort of constant in your life and you being basically the same age, plus your fondness for him made it definitely easier for you two to get along very well!
you found the puppy love he had for capitano to be quite adorable, often teasing your husband about his little admirer which the big man shrugged off with a low growl and a shake of his head. but as you spend more and more time together you quickly realized that this puppy love for your husband also extended over to you, and it wasn't a pure puppy love either.
suddenly everything made sense and clicked right into place; all of the fond looks for you two, the red cheeks and constant need to be in your general vicinity now made sense, the lovely ginger was in love with you and your hubby<3
you never brought it up with capitano in fear of what he'd possibly do to ajax and you didn't want to jeopardize your friendship and possibly put him in harms way so you kept that little secret to yourself although you suspected that your man already at least had the general idea of what was going on; maybe he wasn't the most charismatic but he was a clever man.
and well, since capitano wasn't here and wouldn't be for another two weeks, no one said you couldn't have some fun right~? the cold snezhnayan days were so lonely and how could you refuse childe hospitality when he showed up with a grin, covered in snow.
you insisted that he stay for a few days mostly out of worry for the man; his lips already turning blueish from the freezing cold, but a little part of you screamed at you to put your 'knowledge' for a test~
and so you invited childe into your household and let your imagination run a little wild. walking around in those fur-lined robes, they were warm but enticing in a primal kind of way and you could see the ginger man gulp but continue to stare at you as you innocently smiled and poured him more tea, making sure your boobs were perfectly on display for him to see.
also you noticed that calling him various pet names seemed to do the trick too, 'good boy' being his favorite judging by the insistent tent in his pants that he thought you wouldn't notice; if he wore a particular pair of soft pants you swore you could see a tiny wet patch start to form but you shyly averted your gaze.
or your all-time favorite, the 'accidental' touches and brushing up against him as you oh so innocently had to walk past him in the kitchen and it just so happened that your breasts had to be squeezed against his own chest for a second or unfortunately having to slip in front of him to help him with kneading the dough for the cake he was helping you make and grinding your ass against his cock, the feeling of having such a big thing jump to attention just from you lightly grinding up against him giving you a ego boost, only to be amplified by the low growl in his throat and the clenched fists as childe barely contained himself from grabbing you by your full hips and and fucking you right then and there in your kitchen.
you might be all nice and smiles but that doesn't mean you were that oblivious and seeing the ginger be so desperate for you and your dear husband you were sure you were going to have so much fun together <3
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caught in the act by gallawitch | rated: M | 2K
Mickey's had a shitty day. The cure? A beer at home with his husband and their teenage kid. But he never expected that his daughter would have a house guest...
a sweet anon popped into my inbox asking "if [i] could write something about if maybe mick and ian had a daughter and one day they left her home alone and came back to her fooling around on the couch with a boy? or a girl." why they think i'm the person to write galladads, i'll never know... but i tried anon! i really tried! especially because my sweet precious goblin king nosho's (@creepkinginc) birthday prompts were: fluff with slice of life.
SO. here are some fluffy dads! i love you nosho! i love you anon! xx
- - - - -
It's been a fucking shitty day.
Mickey throws open the front door with all of the force he can muster, ignoring the flare of pain in his bad shoulder. Stupid thingâs been acting up again since the weatherâs turned cold.Â
The metal of the doorknob cracks against the plaster of the wall in their entryway, and Ian winces. âMickââ
âNot now, Ian,â Mickey barks.Â
[ read the rest below the cut or here on ao3]
What he wants to say is, Fuck off, Gallagher, but theyâve spent over two decades together, and can at least be on a first name basis. Plus, heâs been trying to work on his reactions to things. Be less hot-headed and more thoughtful, or whatever the fuck. But heâs almost at the end of his rope, his fuse already lit and rapidly burning down thanks to a frustrating combination of idiot clients and useless new hires.Â
Itâs days like today that have him wondering why exactly he thought he wanted to run a business. Be somebodyâs boss. Be responsible for keeping the lights on and the customers happy. Even though he's been doing this for years, he can't help but think that it was a lot easier when he was running drugs and whores.
Louder, though, and he's become accustomed to the quiet.
He needs a fucking beer.Â
Two maybe, he thinks as he toes off his boots. Shoves them in his designated cubby in the hall closet like the little domestic bitch he is. Even steps out of the way so that Ian can come up beside him and drop his own shoes off.Â
Mickeyâs not mad at him. No reason to be, they don't even work together anymore. Haven't in years. But Ian'd offered to pick him up after his shift at the new hospital downtown, and he'd stepped right into the crosshairs of an already terrible mood. Mickey just needs a minute to unwind.
Before either of them can say anything further, a slight whimper, of all things, wafts towards them.
Mickey cranes his neck to see further into the house, his rage quickly finding a new target. He feels Ianâs chest close to his back, and lifts a finger to his lips.
Other sounds followâa hitched breath, the shifting of bodies against the soft, leather of their new couch (a splurge purchase made when all kids and dogs had been sufficiently trained up and housebroken), a small, wet pop that makes Mickey's spine curl.
He catches Ianâs curious stare, their shoulders raising as they make their way to the living room. It all feels familiar, yet odd. Been a while since either of them had their shackles up. The Southside even feels somewhat safe these days, thanks to a new generation of kids and a bunch of gentrifying motherfuckers.Â
So it comes as a surprise to see someone strange in their house, making slick noises on their furniture, sticking their tongue down their daughterâsâ
âOh, hell no! You gotta be shitting me!â Mickey yells, Ian right at his heels.
The kid leaps to his feet, his shoulder-length hair as disheveled as his button-down; his eyes and his boner bulging in tandem. He looks to Mickey, horror-stricken, then glances at Ian before looking down towards the girl on the couch: sixteen-year-old Josephine Gallagher-Milkovich, bright red hair sprawled out beneath her wide, green eyes.
âHey DadâŠâ she says, shrugging just slightly.
Mickeyâs blood boils. âHey Dad?! Jo, what the fuck?â
She scrambles to sit up, grabbing the blanket at the end of the couch to cover herself, despite being fully clothed.Â
Thank Christ.
âI think you should probably leave,â Ian chimes in, pulling Mickeyâs attention back to the kid wilting silently to his left. âDoorâs just that way.â
âThatâs a good fucking idea,â Mickey yells. He takes a step forward and crosses his arms, settling into a wide stance. âBetter yet, letâs make sure I never see you again. Got it, Pimple Puss?â
âYes, Sir. Sorry, Sir,â the kid mumbles, shoving on his shoes at lightening speed. He stands, looking at them both. âUh, Sirs.â
âYeah, yeah, get the fuck outta here!â Mickey reiterates as the kid runs past him. Mickey swings back around towards his daughter, who has dared to stand up while his back was turned. âNot so fast! You better stay right where you are.â
She freezes, her eyes wandering to Ian. The door slams shut behind them, and he jumps a bit. Shrugs. Shakes off her stare. He wants to be the one to come through for her, soften the blow of whatâs about to happen, but he canât. His hands are tied. Instead, he reaches for Mickeyâs wrist, turning him slightly.Â
Warm green eyes catch his ice-cold stare.
âMickey, think about this,â he whispers. His gaze is sweet, and he rubs a little circle with his thumb across Mickeyâs pulse-point. Itâs soothing, and it brings Mickey back into his body for a moment. Back to the present. Back from another day, in another house, when it was them getting caught.Â
Fuck, he hadnât visited that memory in a while. Didnât even realize heâd slipped there now until Ianâs breath ghosted his temple, his words evoking yet another day with the same captor. The gun in his hand that time. His eyes wild. Mick, pause.
Mickey sniffs. Gives Ian a curt nod, sucking his lip between his teeth, and preparing to face his dumbass daughter again. âGive us a minute?â
Ian squeezes his wrist, âCourse.â
Jo opens her mouth in protest, but closes it again off of Ianâs look. Sheâs sure heâll have his own shit to say about the state sheâs been discovered inâthe rules, and the trust that she knows sheâs brokenâbut thatâs sure to be a calmer conversation. Less at stake, and everybody knows it.
âGonna order us a pizza, Iâm starving,â Ian calls behind him as he leaves his two most cherished people to hash it out.
Itâs instantly uncomfortable.Â
Jo picks at the skin on her lip, her ticks always more Mickey than Ian. Nurture kicking natureâs ass. But Mickeyâs never been able to hold steady around a Gallagher pout, so when he finally exhales and meets her eyes, he knows heâs full of nothing but hot air.
"I ain't mad," he says, pinching the bridge of his nose between his thumb and pointer fingerâa move that absolutely doesn't say everything's cool.
"You're not?" Jo asks, her eyebrows crinkling.
He drops his hands and takes in her expression, now dancing between terrified and confused. Shakes his head and says, âCourse not. I was banging your pops all over this neighborhood way younger than you are now.â
"Ugh, Dad.â
Mickey chuckles, briefly lost again in different, more pleasant memories; of stock rooms and refrigerators. âGot caught a lot, too.â
Joâs shocked. âYou did?â
ââCourse we did. We were dumb fucking kids! Got caught by his pervert boss, by fucking Frank... Another time, tooâŠâ He shifts his weight, and thumbs at his nose. âLet's just say that if you're gonna follow in our footsteps and fuck around in the open, you're goddamn lucky that it's us walking in that door.â
Jo nods. She doesnât know the ins and outs of her fathersâs lives before her. Neither of them have spilled all of their secrets, and some things might never be relayed. But she knows enough to know it was way different from how she's grown up, and she knows that she can always ask. Theyâll be honest with her. Theyâve made a point to share whatâs important, and tell it to her straight.Â
Sheâs a good kid.Â
They raised her up pretty damn well, despite all of the fear, and the doubts.
Mickey clicks his teeth, making his way to sit beside her on the couch."A guy though? Really? I mean, I get it.â He pops her one on the shoulder, playfully. âBut I was always kinda hoping you'd be smarter than me.â
Jo goes beet red, her arms folding cross her chest. "Uh, yeah, about that..." She takes a deep breath and says, âIâm⊠queer. I think. I like, uh, both. All? People. I like people.â
âOh,â Mickey says, his eyebrows shooting up his forehead.
âYeah."
âCool."
She squints at him. âCool?â
"Never really liked anyone 'sides that alien-lookin' motherfucker listening in from the kitchen" â there's a rustling from the room in question as Ian backs away from the doorway â "But yeah, that's cool. Thanks for telling me.â
She nods. "Thanks for listening.â
"Look, I may not be the easiest to talk to or the most in touch with my feelings or whatever, but I'm always gonna listen." He puts a tattooed hand on her knee. "I love you, kid.â
"I love you too, Dad.â
He pulls her in, tight to his chest. Her hands ball into little fists against his back as she wraps around him, and he remembers those same fists grabbing tight to his pointer finger the day she came home from the hospital.
A new surge of possessiveness swoops through him.Â
"You being safe?â
âDadâŠâ
He can hear the eye roll, so he pulls back, taking her by the shoulders trying to catch it in action. Knows sheâs embarrassed, but he ainât done yet. Even as a dad, he can be a little shit.Â
"I can tell ya about condoms and lube, though that might not be such a thing for you? I don't know fuck all about a woman's body. Already seen way more than I ever wanted to⊠And it seems like you're past whatever I woulda told you beforeâŠ"
She shudders at the outpouring of information, but sheâs intrigued. "What would you have told me before?â
He settles back on the couch, spreading his legs just slightly, a mischievous smirk on his face.Â
"Aight, I got yer cheap birth control right here. Only costs a penny. You put the penny on the inside of your kneeâdoesnât matter whichâand then you hold it in place with the other knee.â
He demonstrates, closing his knees together and holding it tight, his hands now raised high in the air.
Jo groans, âOh my god.âÂ
Ian plops down on the couch next to Mickey, tired of being relegated to the kitchen. âYouâre a dumbass.â
"'Ey, I think it's a great option,â Mickey balks. âAffordable, ya know?â
"You heard?â Jo asks Ian, her cheeks pinking up.
"I heard,â he confirms, his arm stretching past Mickey to tenderly touch her cheek. âWe love you.â
âLove you too,â she says. âAnd I'm being safe⊠Haven't really done much yet.â
"Take your time,â Ian says simply. âThereâs no rush.â
âHeâs right,â Mickey adds, âespecially because youâll be grounded for the next month.â
âA month?! For kissing? Thatâs not fair!â Jo complains.
âTough.â
âBut you said it yourself Iâm not doing anything you two werenât doing!â
âFine, two weeks,â Ian says, earning him a âyes!â from Jo, and a scowl from his husband.
âDid you even order dinner in there or were you just listening in the whole time?"
Ian flushes. Grumbles something as he pulls out his phone.
âFucking figures,â Mickey says. Turns back to Jo. âAnd weâre your parents, kid. Thingâs ainât always going to be fair. So, fine, two weeks because your old manâs a pushover, but I better not catch you hooking up on my couch again, capisce?â
âCapisce,â she smiles.
Young, bare knuckles bump against older, inked ones.
âNow, Iâve had a crap day. Make yourself useful and get me a beer, would you?â
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