#bc you usually have to partner up

[fujii-draws]

OKAY! Chatot rant in tags below! Read at your own discretion.

#okay starting from the beginning of where ppl usually dislike him. apple woods chapter. #he doesn’t give hero/partner the CHANCE to explain themselves despite them being relatively good recruits up until that point. #and that legit might be my only gripe with that chapter bc!!! stories need conflict! I LIKE the conflict in apple woods!!! #hero and partner being punished so something they didn’t do! #the misunderstanding! how team skull (Skuntank) actually outplays the main duo with a clever yet rotten trick. I LOVE that it segways into- #one of the more sweeter scenes of guild members looking out for eachother. I LIKE APPLE WOODS CONFLICT. #but chatot just. not giving them a chance. is so dumb. #I’d personally fix this by having a lil montage of hero/partner fucking up on jobs. A LOT. and chatot giving them a pass every time. #and let the perfect apple incident BE the one where he puts his foot down and doesn’t listen to them. bc he’d given them loads of chances. #and doesn’t want to hear any excuse. #but yeah. I legit dont mind him during that chapter except for that really stupid and frustrating moment. #NOW. CHAPTER 17. #UGGGGHHH WHERE DO I BEGIN #Him not believing hero and Partner about Grovyle and the future being in ruin? FINE. ACTUALLY GOOD. BC CHATOT WOULD BE SKEPTIC. #IT FITS HIS CHARACTER!! #BUT WHAT DOES SUCK. IS HIM GOING ‘Dusknoir isn’t the bad guy. he didn’t do anything wrong’ #WHEN HE LITERALLY KIDNAPPED HERO AND PARTNER RIGHT I N F R O N T OF HIM. #(​NO LITERALLY. HIS CHARACTER IS IN THE FRONT ROW WHEN IT HAPPENED.) #and him. having the GALL to tell hero and partner they must’ve been ‘seeing things’ and downplaying the HELL they went through. #despite them being missing for hours/days. his own guild recruits. and his angry sprite showing up. #like. I think that’s when I genuinely despised him. #that and him going ‘OH I BELIEVED YOU THE WHOLE TIME HEEHOO :)’ shit was so fucking annoying. #just playing it off as a joke the second the guild started to believe hero and partner. #IMAGINE IF HE W A S ACTUALLY TESTING THE GUILD’S TRUST. SHOWCASING HIM AS THE MORE RESPONSIBLE AND RESPECTFUL RIGHT HAND OF THE GUILD. #and yes. Brine cave he saves hero and partner. but at that point I just didn’t care anymore. #he fucked those two over so much. that I didn’t care what ‘valiant’ sacrifice he had. #and he grills Team Skull for what they did OFF SCREEN. they couldn’t even give us THAT. #<<< THAT or him outright saying sorry would’ve been nice. IKIK his ‘actions’ or whatever but. #eughh again this is all imo. I’m not trying to make people hate him or change their mind. #I’ll get into positives in the second post cause I’m running out of tags

[satans-knitwear]

I wanna try some new things 🤔

My links

#But rn you can have my usual!! Having a partner i could comfortably explore with would be cool i guess #I wanna experiment a bit more and learn what else im into and what else others are into #But apparently you actually have to interact with ppl to do that #Someone needs to kick me up the ass and get me out there. Bc i cannot make myself do it. Im too good at arguing with myself 😂 #Satans knitwear #Alt pinup #Pinup girl #Very much a satans knitwear classic set here. Its a day for comforting myself #Pretty lingerie #Blue lace lingerie #Gold lace corset #Corsetry #Underbust corset #Lace lingerie body #bi girl #cheeky #wlw

[volitioncheck]

always thought this line was funny considering there’s Plenty of instances of kim calling harry his partner, and harry of course refers to kim as his partner all the time.

most of these i’d interpret as kim referring to him in a case-partner sense— i imagine that it’s a pretty common occurrence for non-partnered officers to pair up with each other on big cases considering kim mentioning that certain procedures (field autopsies, death notifications, etc) require two officers by RCM protocol.

but there’s a couple examples where it feels more… deliberate?

it intrigues me that the best example i could find of kim asserting him and harry’s partnership is from apologizing to him after the most egregious way you can fuck up your relationship to him in the game.

kim never ‘corrects’ harry anywhere else other than that convo with jean. kim seems to already be falling into viewing him and harry as official partners— only becoming self-conscious of it when suddenly faced with harry’s “actual” partner. his protest in front of jean feels like he’s correcting himself just as much as harry.

i dunno if i have any big conclusion i was trying to reach here, i just always found the line funny and even more telling when i looked up just how much he contradicts it everywhere else in-game. spongebob meme vc you likeee me don’t you lieutenant.

bonus result that doesn’t have anything to do with the rest really but i didn’t know you could tie at suzerainty and i’ve never seen this dialogue before. kim.

#disco elysium #kim kitsuragi #sure i’ll tag this as #kimharry #why not #sidenote i wonder if kim has to pair up with other random officers often in order to properly complete cases #i wonder how he felt about them‚ how much he usually likes or doesn’t like working with someone else #how long has he been working alone since his last partner (presumably) died? why *doesn’t* he already have a new one? #every other field officer we get a glimpse from in precinct 41 is paired up #maybe it’s more common for officers from the GRIH to work alone on account of it being less dangerous than jamrock? #does kim miss working with a partner i wonder #he falls into step with working with one again so easily it seems #again. spongebob meme bc you likeeeee me don’t you lieutenant #me talking

[ciderjacks]

Weird observation but I just noticed that when Dulcie is talking to Cath (especially in episode 4) her body language changes, sort of subtly, but you can see the way her movements become more awkward (shifting on her feet and clearly not being sure where to look, etc) and how she tries to make herself smaller (sticking her hands into her pockets, hunching down, lowering her head), contrast with how she is around Eddie, where she’s clearly comfortable in taking up the space.

In her fight with Cath, she is very deliberate to stay on her side of the desk, she keeps her voice quiet and controlled for most of it, and even when she has her big “are you kidding me?!” moment, discovering how much Cath lied to her / kept from her about the case, she stays out of Cath’s bubble entirely. after that outburst, despite being angry, she doesn’t confront Cath physically, she instead sits in the corner, hunched over with her arms crossed.

It’s only in the makeup scene, when Cath is apologizing for everything and they’re reconciling, that you see her body language open. When they kiss she reaches for Cath’s face and not her waist, she isn’t hunching, she’s also more firm with Cath too and in that scene Cath actually listens to her.

Also Kate Box should receive a million billion awards and one hundred thousand dollars

#deadloch #Usually you see this body dynamic shown when it’s an abusive relationship #And while at the point we see them Cath is definitely not being a great partner to Dulcie #Shes not abusive or controlling #In fact she clearly wants Dulcie to come out of her shell and enjoy life more too #In their case Dulcie’s body language is probably more the manifestation of her feeling real soul eating shame for the Sydney incident #She clearly feels like she’s lost the right to Cath’s love and is trying to make up for it by letting Cath lead in every single way #No matter how miserable it makes her #She doesn’t feel like she has the right to be an equal in their relationship anymore so she hunches down and stays quiet #And this isn’t helped by Cath constantly affirming this feeling by holding what happened over her head and using it to guilt her #Into doing things #thats why in the fight while she is definitely still closed off her outburst is probably the most open we see her with Cath at that point #And why in the scene when Cath apologizes she opens up bc it’s at that point she realizes that they’re back to being equals #And Cath doesn’t want her to be unhappy or have to fold herself for her #character analysis #i guess #i like body language

[mcybree]

Ok ok ok I'm not Tryna start discourse but bluestars prophecy was my first ever warriors book and bluestar will always be my favourite so I'm gonna make some counterpoints to you about her being a Smajor character

bluestar has always been led by an intense loyalty and dedication to those she loves and cares for - this includes her mum, her sister, her clan, eventually Firepaw when he joins the clan, and she has a VERY strong moral compass when it comes to doing the right thing - when she sees thistleclaw teaching tigerpaw to hurt a then baby scourge she very much discourages it and is against it

Afaik scott is Not like that, he doesn't have an emotional or love-driven moral code, he does things because they're smart decisions in the long term or because he wants to. Granted I havent seen a ton of his stuff but I have seen his limited life and 3rd life perspectives and he is very much a singular team player there, there to look after himself and well if people align with him that's great he's got allies (jimmy and Martyn) but he won't go out of his way to care for them

Bluestars defiance of starclan in the first series is BECAUSE she gave herself to them and what the warrior code demanded so much - yes she broke clan rules by having kids with crookedstar but she did everything in her power to make sure they'd have a happy life and felt terrible that thrushpelt was willing to say they were his to save her reputation. She didn't do it out of a selfish want, she only ever wanted to help her clan and those she loved, and her becoming clan leader is emblematic of that want. When she rejects starclan so wholeheartedly in the first series it's because THINGS KEEP GOING WRONG WHEN SHES TRIED SO HARD TO STOP THEM FROM DOING THAT - starclan has never cared about the sacrifices she made to keep her loved ones and clan safe, she lost her mother, her sister, her kits, her mate, literally everything, and things STILL KEEP GETTING WORSE. it's not a demand that she deserves to have everything good, it's a cry for help that shouldn't something go right after she's tried so hard???

C!Scott isn't like that. He puts himself above others and inherently believes he will get the best if he just plays his cards right, and he is good at it, he's very competent at lasting a long time in life series and getting what he wants - the ruthlessness of gem driven by desperation kills him in secret life, Martyn's complete fucking about face kills him in limited life, and I'm pretty sure it's etho who gets him out in 3rd life by luck. He doesn't plan to look after the ones he cares about, because he cares about himself first and foremost. Yeah you can argue when he doesn't get what he wants he gets annoyed, but his is less of a 'why don't I get this don't I deserve it' and more of a 'oh fuck this didn't work. Ok new plan double down on getting what I want by appeasing to people cos they're easy to read and therefore account for'

I don't doubt Scott would make a bluestar adjacent character if he made a warrior cats oc BUT his character would honestly be closer to darktail or ashfur than bluestar and that's that on that.

(sorry you activated 13 year old me's unskippable cutscene sjdjsjsjja this isnt meant to be a serious argument I just love bluestar a lot and love talking about her)

OKAY 1. this is fucking awesome thank you 2. i am going to do something new and exciting (advocate for scott instead of beating him to death with sticks) because unfortunately this bluestar info has only made me believe she is a smajor character even more.

As a general note when I talk about smajor characters as a collective here I’m referring to characters more in the realm of esmp/traffic/rats/pirates/etc, less vampire scott or necromancer scott who are intended to be villainous.

Scott characters tend to operate under a “If I am not a Good Person I may as well die” rule, and consequently abide by a strict moral code to keep themselves feeling clean. For instance: traffic Scott will never go back on his word, he will avoid dishonesty, and he won’t take from others unless he is sure that he can repay them. He will never betray his seasonal primary ally (even when they betray him first), and will often give people things just because they asked him nicely. He stakes a lot of his own identity on this, because it is through being a “good person” that he justifies his superiority (and, by extension, his own existence); in his mind he deserves the best and *is* the best because he is such a good person. When things don’t go his way, he thinks he doesn’t deserve it because he has been nothing but good, so he tries to place a reason. He often assumes that somebody must “have a vendetta” against him, even if this somebody is the world (see: him asking if limlife episode 1 boogeyman is some kind of joke played on him for not giving in to the boogey curse in Last Life.) which is very Bluestar to me, convinced that her misfortunes are a divine punishment.

This is all to say that Scott does have a strict moral code and deep sense of loyalty. Being a “good person” and devoted partner in the ways he understands it are so ingrained into what he is that I think he definitely has the capacity to be a Bluestar if he were raised being taught clan values, even if his internal systems are often built around never letting gross emotions be fully felt rather than what those emotions compel him to do.

#ive always wanted to partake in pointless character debate on tumblr #considered maintagging this but didnt want people looking at your ask weird. sorry yall we serve fucked up scott here #“But bree” you might ask “what about pearl? He wasnt a very devoted partner then!” #and to that I say: pearl isnt a person to him. and neither is jimmy. Scott fucked up with both of them and unfortunately if he is not good- #and justified 100% of the time he loses his entire identity so convincing himself that they are incompetent or crazy so that he #doesnt have to self reflect is how he gets by. he would literally rather kill himself than earnestly admit fault for anything #… huh. about the above tags I dont remember the lore but is there any parallel there with the whole bright heart thing #genuine question bc I do not remember why blue star did that and I dont trust the wiki #(Trying to space out names so they dont tag) #I really hope this makes sense btw bc I feel like I usually list a lot more examples… but im tired #I can elaborate on any point here if need be ig. I dont talk about this aspect of him often because the literal entire fandom does already #Every scott analysis post out there is about his damn loyalty… anyways yeah scotts loyalty is transactional more often than emotional but #It’s still loyalty and also. hard to draw the line between where the emotions stop sometimes because he can stop giving a fuck about— #most things on a whim. How much scott genuinely cares about something is a forever undefinable concept #asks #he is genuinely a very good ally to have usually. like jimmy was very much the exception there #he does like helping people out he does. he’s just also emotionally detached so he tallies his favors and good deeds to bring up later if— #someone he’s helped decides to go against him. If that makes sense #sorry man I just keep talking. I love this blue animal……. #thanks for the ask genuinely I love when paragraphs about characters #anyways im gonna pass out and. Shakes myself STOP ADDING MORE TAGSSS i think im so tired man

[fourteenthz]

(they almost died for the third time this week)

#strays!au #thesa/thancred #x: together to the bitter end #trying to buy you all on my no-louisoix-meet-cute au were thancred mets her right after she leaves the forest #which is just basically balfran but make it ✨them✨ #thancred is still just a thief and they are literally partners in crime. that's it. they have fun stealing. for a bit. #I think louisoix exists he's just not in the picture so pretty canon divergence bc it's an au I don't want to think abt like idk #the specificities of what happened during the 7th umbral calamity LOL DON'T THINK ABT THIS LORE TOO DEEPLY. IGNORE THAN'S TATTOO AS WELL. #I'm just in full ffxii mood rn and I was like “thancred would wear balthier's rings” and scalated from there. #besides the point that ofc thesa/thancred is already too balfran coded. this time there just EXTRA balfran. #I just think they can have a little fun and steal from the rich. as a treat. #and I can have a little fun with gposing since I finished uni work early (2am) as a THREAT so YEAH HAVE AT IT. *throws them at you* #I need a name for this au that isn't balfran or robinwood. anyway. we will get there eventually. also I need to replay xii. oh well #wol posting #kelly says #will I also ever be brave enough to let my ship/wol posts open to rb? who knows #wc!au #(for now?? idk man I need to sleep.) #also extra info abt this photoset noone asked: 1. thesa slowly smiling as soon as he turns his back bc she usually does when hes not lookin #2. thancred always keeps his hand above his glasses if he's still drinking bc if anyone reconizes him chances are that they hate him and #and are trying to kill him. 3. thesa's lil ear tensing up when he touches her and then easing again once he let's go #also the place this was taken + the whole “hume” thing from xii makes me think if I don't want this au to be played on the first.... #like pre-calamity and all that. multiverse shit you know? hm.... i would like to met ardbert and friends heheh LETS SEE #obligatory: ASK ME ABT MY AUS HEYYY I'll go to bed now but... them. yeah them.

[protectoroffaeries]

"you're the only one who really sees me & accepts me for who i am" but it's me & my cat (i'm the only person who doesn't flinch when he sneezes on them)

#i was telling my mom that my partner & their sister tease me bc i dont react when skip sneezes on me #he sneezes a lot so pushing him away or jumping away every time feels mean #im gonna get hit with snot some times anyway so ill just clean it up when im done whatever im doing is usually my mentality #so anyway skip started having a sneezing fit on my head this morning & my mom was like you were not kidding u dont react at all

[chamerionwrites]

Re: the so-called friendzone, it would be MUCH easier to date those whose friendship you deeply value if so many people didn't suck so hard at maintaining post-romantic friendships!

#i have absolutely zero hard feelings about the mutually amicable breakup w my first v serious partner who was a close friend of many years #i STILL get hit by flashes of intense unexpected grief bc that convo included both of us saying ''promise we will stay friends'' #and i kept that promise and so did he right up until he got married :/ #like i get that it can be complex and also people can be weird about it but it doesn't have to BE weird if you choose not to make it so #and also. well meaning and understandable and unforeseeable as it may be. you lied to me bro. ://// #anyway sorry for inflicting my maudlin decades old and tbh mostly healed angst upon you all #usually i don't even think about it but once in a rare while it surprises me with how much it fucking stings #sorry maybe i'm missing something but idk why people act like this is sooooo unfeasible. rip to you but i'm different. #and so are several of my OTHER exes FOR THE RECORD #ANYWAY straight woman who fails hard enough at gender to make male friends more easily angst hours i guess #my posts #also #gender stuff

[tojiswhore-nanamisslut]

I sent so many emails today

#like 5? were to clients and 4 were to foreign attorneys and like 12 were to partners lol #sending emails to clients and FAs is always nerve wracking tho #but the partners will usually review my draft email to clients before i send it #but for FAs not so much esp if it's just a status check #but today i had to email an FA to request examination of the client's patents in Canada #and i had asked the partner if there was anything i had to do before requesting examination bc i noticed for some in the past #we had amended claims and he was like well method of treatment claims aren't allowed anywhere but the US #and we went thru it and i understood bc i mean its not difficult and then he was like “i have confidence that you understand at a high level #what to look for when telling them to cancel certain claims so go ahead and email a request for all of these and dw about #getting me to sign off but also feel free to call if you do have qs or want me to review what you wrote.“ #so i sent emails to the FA requesting exam of specific claims and terminating method claims without anyone looking it over beforehand #and oh man i was nervous but i sent the emails and the partner didn't call me to tell me i fucked up so 😭 #honestly its a compliment that he even said he had confidence in me lol this guy doesnt usually have faith in anyone ☠️ #posts

[daz4i]

how to stop thinking any good thing someone says to you (like compliments or being proud of you or other positive expressions such as these) is a lie just to be polite or bc they're biased and thus can't judge you work and your being objectively bc they love you. asking for a friend

#lovebombing won't work on me i will automatically assume there is an ulterior motive there #i may be off on what it is. but i won't trust it either anyway #(joking btw ik i'm not immune to abuse tactics. that's actually part of why i'm vigilant to all that i think) #(but not only) #i think my main issue is i know in my heart these things can't be right. the bigger the compliment the less i believe it #bc i'm below average and so is anything i create. propping it (and me) up as smth unique feels disingenuous #in my heart i do want this like i wanna be told nice things but they usually make me feel worse lol #bc i still think i'm shit and now i feel like i can't trust that person either. #(still. if someone is mean to me or even just harsh instead. i will cry) #also while this is already very deep and digging into my core the next tags are gonna dig into therapy level deepness lol #i think this is actually why i only want ppl to be sexually attracted to me honestly #smth abt it being like. a physical reaction. makes it easier to believe for me #also smth you can express smth you can do to prove it beyond just saying words #(i will sometimes still doubt it when i have a steady partner of any sort lol like i'll ask if they just indulge me or actually want it) #which is why it's fucking me up sm that i'm getting uglier 🥲 i'm already not great - being trans and fat limits a lot of your options - but #things are getting even worse lol 🥲 who knew that was even possible #all this isn't really a very good base to stop hating yourself. so my self loathing is only getting worse every day #thus making any good word harder to believe. and the cycle continues #. yknow when i started typing this post i did not expect to go on for this long #i am on these sleeping pills that make me lose my filter i'm sorry 😔 #vent

[that-cheer-up-anon]

Yesterday was really fun (despite having to wake up early)! Went to the city w my partner to hang out w my big sister at a Japanese market.

There were quite a few stalls w stickers, charms, ceramics, and even a build-your-own terrarium! Had hojicha gelato and honestly I can see why my big sis likes hojicha more than matcha (I think I do too).

There was an area where you could write your wishes on paper and tape it to bamboo for Tanabata. There was one where someone drew a tall among us, and another where someone just wrote "Live, Laugh, Love" which I don't think is a wish, but whatever.

Bought a lot of stickers, an enamel pin and a couple of scrunchies from local artists which was really nice! I was so caught up w the stalls I forgot there was a second level and grocery, so I guess we'll have to go another time to see what's up there.

After the market we got some ramen and it was soooo good! It was my second time going there but the first time for my big sis. We all got black garlic ramen. She said it was really good and worth the money (she lived in Japan for years so I know she knows her stuff), so I'm glad we know at least ONE good authentic ramen place.

We split ways w my big sis and went to a billiard hall and played pool for an hour before heading home. Never been to a billiard hall before which was cool. We got there as soon as it opened so it was mostly empty. I had a lot of fun (even though I lost both rounds lol).

#Ella life #Ella face #the main reason for meeting up w my big sis was for her to give me some makeup brushes and a hair styling kit she didn't want #it was a zip up case w compartments w hair ties a claw clip a comb and some flyaways gel #which was really nice bc I only thought I was gonna get the brushes and a lipstick #the lipstick I got is the red one in my pics! it's Adele by Sahursart. #although during the day I was wearing more brown mauve nude lipstick #my hair was a lot more wavy bc I had it in tight twin buns the whole day before and slept in them #but honestly I took my outfit and makeup pics after the hangout #in usual ADHD late fashion I had to rush so I couldn't take pics before leaving #so you can't see the full waviness I had going on but oh well #also I LOVE having a partner who lets me dress however I like and is so supportive of me.

[multiipl]

*; OOC » some ppl really be going onto my rules?? and then hit me up on anon shitting on my triggers like “what’s wrong with Z*tara???” “Why would b*k*d*k* trigger you?? It’s so popular” in a tone so judgmental and condescending like ??? First of all rude? Second of all, I could list more ships that trigger me because they are shipping victims and abusers. “But those ships are so popular” yeah and? just bc they are popular doesn’t make it less triggering for me. The reason they are popular are precisely why I use them as my prime examples in my rules. I have them blacklisted for a reason. Like. Most/Each individual ship is another whole individual can of worms to open that I won’t go into detail because that’s not the point of this post. 

The point of this post is that I do not have to justify why shipping victims with their abusers is triggering to me. I’d appreciate it if instead of questioning me bc “they are so popular tho” people could just respect my triggers. Thanks and good night.

#*; here we go again » ooc #tw: abuse #//Usually I just ignore it cuz like... I dont have to justify my triggers but like #//sometimes I am baffled by how these keep coming and it keeps frustrating me #//I wont pick this up *again* I will say this once and ONLY once #//Further snarky or thoughtless anons like this will be deleted. #// vent #tw: vent #//Especially bc like... there is a difference between shipping 'problematic' characters and characters who have done wrong #versus straight up victims and their abusers #//For example - KaiNier. Spoiler alert but Kainé beats Nier before they go fight the shadowlord. was it wrong? yes. she knows. #she realises almost immediately that it was wrong of her to 'beat some sense' into Nier who was grieving #//meanwhile there's ships out there with the abuser continuously causing harm to their 'partner' for the sake of it. #ships where the abuser is a constant reminder of the victims trauma. where the victim is made to obey the abuser #//Like no thank you miss me with that shit

[kennabeth]

dustfinger: I love all of my children equally, brianna, farid, and [looks at smudged writing on hands] john

#tcor spoilers #HATE that there was no actual resolution this #i understand fully that it can be difficult when your partner's child (who is not also yours) looks like their other parent #feelings are hard to change! sure! #but: roxane is friends with her husband's affair partner. atp he has no right to show any hurt over her remarrying #and that includes taking it out on jehan #he doesnt say himself that theres any resentment (which is odd bc he loves telling us all his shitty thiughts usually; too stressed out #for self reflection right this second?) #but nyame talks about how obvious and infuriating it is #not to say jehan's making it up (i would never never never doubt my babiest boy) but it's bad enough that people outside the family see it #('outside the family' it's his uncle but outside the home ig) #where was i going with this #having a was-hoping-id-find-the-end-of-this-thought-when-i-came-to-it moment #oh right the lack of self reflection made me wonder if dustfinger knew he was acting like this at all #and i was PRAYING for nyame to chew him out over it #there were so many good spots for that conversation too #when df was practically dead for the third time and jehan stayed with him to make sure he didnt actually die #i expected 'i dreamed about you burning alive every night for ten years' levels of dustfinger being yelled at from jehan #and we literally?? didnt get a single chapter from either of their povs at that time?? what the actual fuck man #okay not to be like 'i could write this better' but a way more satisfying conclusion to everything that started #with nyame saying the two of them are so similar #would have been [jehan rightly makes dustfinger feel bad about continuing to be a terrible father] -> [jehan storms off to orpheus' to #'offer' dustfinger in exchange for the book but the adults dont know where he went] -> [nyame comes back and also yells at df #for letting his kid run off and drive home that he really is failing jehan and points out to him their similarities] -> #[df goes oh shit i also tried trading innocent people for a book] -> #[whatever. resolution] #do u see what i mean #his ~apology~ to meggie in book 2 is so good while being in character #and he cant apologize to his stepson? he barely fking knew meggie lmao #says kenna

[non-un-topo]

Realizing that the amount of money I'll have to my name after graduation is roughly the same amount that my BIL spent in two weeks on his honeymoon and I want to RAAAAAGE

#i'm budgeting for the remainder of my undergrad just tallying up stuff and it's uhh. not good babe. #if people can beg for money on tumblr then so can i. eventually. might consider opening commissions when i actually have time and energy #takes a lot of time and energy to do even a sketch #lol i was there when my BIL got a card from some relatives who didn't make it to the wedding. #dude was holding over $1000 in cash in his hands. i think it might have been double that actually. #and iirc he complained about it. i hope he was joking?? #so should goob and i get married just so everyone can kiss our asses and hand us money? bc we've been together for 7 years where's our cash #the amount of money i have right now is probably close to the price of the engagement ring. i didn't ask how expensive it was #ok that's an exaggeration but 100% their outfits cost as much as i have. #idk why i'm so mad about this maybe it's because my partner and i still live with their parents and we get Nothiiiiiiiiiiiing #and we usually complain about nothing too #and i'm experiencing some intense money anxiety because i talked to my mother and sister. you know how it is.

[loumauve]

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#sometimes I wish there was like a guide or sth to dealing with intimacy when you're ace #not just in relationships but also in relationships #bc sometimes I think back to conversations I've had with non-ace folks in the past #and usually they would come down to sth like 'when you know you know' #or 'there's gonna be this look and you'll know it's the right moment' #which all seems fake af and untrue and entirely un-applicable if you've agreed to sth else #like.. if you've agreed to not worry abt that and that you'll pick up the topic if anything ever changes #but how do you know if things have changed. how do you know what you want vs what you're wanting only in the moment #and how do you not make it awkward if you bring it up only to later realise maybe you were just having a weird moment #(like. I go through phases every month and I know it's coming. but I also know it'll go away again eventually) #(and like.. I guess I'm still terrified of setting expectations for things I can later not fulfill) #(and sure that's prob due to fucked up shit that happened in past relationships and this is not the same) #((..the difference a partner you can trust to keep their word on respecting your boundaries can make...)) #anyway. scared shitless of starting sth I can't finish. also unsure if I want to start anything in the first place #and just so tired of not knowing where to even fucking start. gonna blame my migraine weirdness for posting this in the first place #a day in the life of.. #(((how to know if maybe you'd like something now when you haven't in the past but now all parameters are different.. #..and maybe it would be nice but maybe it would still suck and you'd end up hating it and feeling regretful.. #..and maybe you'll never be able to get out of your head enough to just have a moment and go with it and be happy)))

[duckiesdoodlesdelight]

me making actual character references vs just doodling a bunch of almost full bodies  . FIGHT !!

#theyre bc i wanna make a space wizard dating sim but im sleeeepy so i might not get around to it #so i will infodump about it in the tags #its pretty simple theres not really any big high stakes unless if you go for the coworker route #bc u then actually get sacrificed or somethin like that. bc that person wnats their partner to have your position #(which is a highly sought out position that al ot of people want but it will never get specified because its funny) #(i'll actually make up the positions real name if i do end up making this) #so ummm the space wizard worldbuilding is basically just #buncha magical people. a lot of them dont end up pursuing magic too deeply and instead just learn the basics #(which is like. levitation and such) #wizards who want to study a specific pathway that isnt space usually end up doing it as a child (esp if u do water stuff bc of the physical #alter..whats it. altercations? no thats fighting. alternations i think. yea alternations) #(the physical alternations . bc ur body needs to be even More water than it was before) #(the hardest part for some people w this water stuff is just... learning to chill out a little. water is very overdramatic and u gotta learn #to keep it in shape. keep it in line. gotta compromise) #i like lee he is so cool to me . his storyline in specific is becoming a certified fire wizard #there aren't many since you have to be very passionate always . fortunately lee is that sort of person. #i mean its not 100% ALWAYS always umm. heart ablaze yadda yadda if the fire in ur heart goes out .. . you know #ooo ooO!!! CALLIE IS A TEACHER BTW . that is why shes dressed like that #a lot of the more loose classical wizard/fantasy magic vibes r reserved for work n such. most wizards have a little halo #to signify how powerful they are #(lee is an exception totally not bc i couldnt get a good fire-themed halo . i dont like the fire just shootin out. idk how to describe it #brain fried . anyways lee is special to me so he gets little flame effect in the hair.) #nettle is very simply a plant user. plant magic m ybeloved. wizards who do plant stuff can also technically control animals #if they so choose it / have a strong enough will for it #they utilize living things to manipulate them into positions / stages of growth #they r very good for the planet building business (of which you are working for with that very special position) #tenmon is ur boss he technically isnt romance-able but if u play ur moves right . maybe #i plan on implying river is asexual since most of the love interests you can actually Build ap lanet with but not river bc. aforementioned #spoilers if i ever do make that. i plan on callie's ''planet'' actually being some moons #nettle makes some fuckin banger planet <3