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historia-vitae-magistras · 9 months

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Hello, I have ceased functioning. You have actually ended me this time. Also I have done the thing where I pick out the best lines and it turns out to be huge swaths of the fic again.

“Be quick and be safe!” Matt tells them. It’s a benediction as hoarse as his prayers are when he thinks there is no one around to hear him. They’re just as futile, too. The time their slaughter brought them is at a standstill, and Matthew’s bullets are gone.

I just... the comparison of "be quick and be safe" to prayers, both in how Matt sounds and how much good it'll do, combined with the hard stop of "Matthew's bullets are gone", absolutely set the tone and tension in the most beautiful, terrifying way. I was instantly heartbroken for the three of them stuck in that hell, and on the edge of my seat.

But she’s ahead of him. It’s the way the world works. Zee sailed into a new day ahead of him on their spinning planet.

I love the way you include these little mentions of their geography! It makes sense for them to perceive themselves/others that way, and it's also absolutely gorgeous imagery.

“Look at me!” She said, this time harsh and sharp. “We do these things together, right? That’s what we said. My balance is your balance. You watch my back, I cover your arse.”

Sobbing I love these two. I couldn't grab everything because then I really would've grabbed most of the fic, but the constant drumbeat of "they belong together, they are the most important person, they're two halves of the same whole" - it's so good. So much of their existences is brutal and lonely and terrifying, but they have each other.

Arthur and Alfred are together, already half aware, and Father looks relieved, openly so. Not a good sign. Alfred looks bewildered. Less empire than boy startled out of bed. Because he still tends to sleep in one of those, even now. Because he is precious and held in reserve.

Okay, the juxtaposition of Jack recognizing that Arthur is relieved to see them vs. the resentment of Alfred having a bed, because he's precious and held back... perfect encapsulation of Arthur's shit parenting. He loves his kids, he does, but Alfred is the favorite and the rest suffer for it. (Also kind of shows the fundamental horrors of the "family." Sure, Alfred's the favorite, but Arthur loves them all and isn't happy that Matt, Jack, and Zee were/are out there - but the three of them are colonies. The purpose of their existence is to sacrifice lives and resources for Arthur's goals, how he feels about them as people won't save them. If Alfred wasn't an empire in his own right he might well be out there too, because being the favorite wouldn't save him from the facts of life as a colony.)

“Enough!” Arthur slammed his hands down on the map-laden table and tugged Zee away, shoving one arm between Alfred’s chest and Jack’s, curling so he was in front of her. But he couldn’t break the grip Alfred had on Jack’s collar. “Get your hands off your brother, boy!”

Without losing sight of the shit parenting, I do appreciate Arthur trying to shut Alfred down and defend Jack.

“I was here, watching his back while you were home turning a fucking profit! We were here when it was all for nothing! You only showed up for what? For what? To take credit? Aunt Bridgie always said you were brave, that you were brilliant. She forgot to mention what a bastard you are!"

GET HIM JACK. I know Alfred's worried about his brother, but Jack is damn right - he doesn't get to ride in 3 years late and then accuse Jack and Zee of being the ones who don't have Matt's back. (Arthur is an entirely other story.) And Brighid telling Jack about how great Alfred is gave me... a lot of feelings. I have not sorted through them all yet but it's a lot to do with that line you wrote (paraphrasing) - "It was my magic that protected you too. Remember that as you take my people and make them your own." Alfred and Jack have this connection through Brighid that feels really powerful but I can't figure out what I'm thinking about it.

“You shut your mouth. I’m not the one who just abandoned Mattie.”

“Ah, my dear boy, but you did that first.”

AND IT'S ARTHUR WITH THE STEEL CHAIR. I mean good lord. He's not wrong, and I'm not even mad at him because Alfred's being a dick, but Jesus Christ. I was yelling at my phone at that one. Arthur is absolutely not entitled to be making that argument, but I feel forced to admire the precision. I also can't tell if that's meant to be on Jack's side or if Arthur just couldn't resist making the jab. 10/10 bastardry, I hate him but am forced to admire the audacity.

“Want another first?” Alfred wasn’t facing them now. This was an argument older than both of them, conducted in shouts muffled from the other end of the house. “I took his head off his shoulders at Yorktown. I shot our dear lord father’s jaw from his fucking skull and his skull from his shoulders and the lobsterbacks surrendered. And then they left. And when the gutters overflowed, you were born.”

I fucking... okay, first, "an argument older than both of them" is so powerful, as is the image of Jack and Zee hearing this argument that's had such a huge impact on the empire - and thus their existence and how they're treated - from the other end of the house. Like, they know it happened/continues to reverberate, and it very much affects their lives, but they aren't allowed to be part of it or witness it, they just deal with knowing it's there and whatever the aftermath is. I'm reminded of the Cromwell fic, where I can simultaneously see kids experiencing a family thing and also colonies experiencing imperial policy.

Second, what the actual fuck Alfred. POS. I know he's upset about Matt, but that's such a fucking horrible thing to say. (Also, a not insignificant portion of your birth was from the "gutters overflowing", asshat.) I felt even worse than I already had for Jack and Zee right then.

“As flattered as your brother would be to see you defending what little of his honour he hasn’t left in a brothel, I rather think we should get to the task of finding him first, no? And perhaps, if you lot can manage more than one task at a time with the single wit I seem to have left you to inherit, we could perhaps even turn back what looks to be an entire German offensive that’s just caught us with our cocks out.” He paused and glanced at Zee. “Barring you, dear girl.”

Arthur, Matt's missing. Maybe refrain from calling him a whore until he's back.

I'm not going to call him just as responsible for the fight, but there must've been something he could've said other than "hey son, I know you're worried about your baby brother, but remember that you abandoned him during the event that's negatively defined our relationship for over a century." Like, he does not get to say that and then act like it's just the kids that are distracted from the tasks at hand here.

"caught us with our cocks out... barring you, dear girl" fucking killed me. You have such a knack for humor, both writing the jokes and knowing where to insert them/how to maintain the balance with the drama. It's so good.

“Excuse you,” A note of laughter in a gravelly voice, still half-ruined by gas. “I am Father’s best knife. Only the finest for when the Krauts come for dinner, eh Dad?”

Matt correcting Alfred from "favorite" to "best" is... I have feelings. On the one hand it's kind of Matt bragging ("I'm not the favorite, I'm the best"), but on the other hand there was the reference to Alfred being the favorite earlier so I'm simultaneously reading it as "I'm not the favorite, I'm the best." Also, this felt very cinematic - we're all focused on the argument, Matt's missing, how are we going to find him, and then bam! He joins the conversation without missing a beat. I love that kind of stuff.

Jack nearly elbowed Dad in the face as Arthur tried to look at a particularly large blood stain oozing from Matt’s shoulder but had to settle for turning his cheek and looking him in the eye a moment before he and Zee nearly got bowled over entirely by Alfred rocketing through. He practically picked Matt up.

Again, Arthur's parenting sucks but I do appreciate him immediately trying to get a look at Matt's injuries (and I wish Jack had actually elbowed him in the face.)

All of the talk/examples at the end of the fic about how the two sets are really similar was so wonderful in a heartbreaking way. They're separate pairs, they're only brought together by the external force of empire - but their dynamics are so similar, right down to the older carrying the younger around everywhere. Jack and Alfred are so similar, but that disconnect in experience and treatment is such a wall between them nonetheless.

I am tired and this fried my brain with feelings and thoughts, so I don't have anything particularly interesting to say - I just absolutely adored this fic and the way you handled all these dynamics. You're such a wonderful writer <3

Thank you 😭😭😭 I can't just 🥺 thank you.

#rolling around happily nearly rebroke my wrist lmao oh my gof #the ask box || probis pateo #why i write #naxos

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shallowseeker · 8 months

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you don't think it's sam that's the john substitute? he's more like john

I think Sam is juuuust enough like her not to trigger the categorization of co-protector. I love Sam, but he's also got that immature-ish Sammy something that ticks just enough "my kid" boxes, you know?

It probably also has to do Mary and Dean's personalities being alike, too. Sam's got one foot in the "Dean's kid," circle, and she identifies more with Dean. And so, Sam may be Mary's kid, but she's also inheriting the dynamic of Sam as Dean's kid, by proxy.

(But Cas? From the get-go, Mary's doling out those incredibly high protector expectations, and it brings out this side of her that's both demanding and abrupt. It's fascinating.)

///

Anyway, in season 12-13, Sam is tragically aware that he and Mary don't have the kind of rapport he craves. (Meanwhile, Dean and she are playing Words with Friends.) In The Big Empty, Sam seems aware of this, and he's actually pretty bitter about his inability to connect:

SAM: Yeah, but at least you had a relationship with Mom. I mean, who would she always call? Who did she look to for everything? You had something with her I never had! And now I’m just supposed to accept that I never will have it?

It won't be until after AU Earth that Mary starts to bond with Sam as an individual. She sees Sam as more of an adult after he starts leading the AU hunters and co-parenting Jack.

///

In Nightmare Logic, she opens up to him about Bobby. She has rightly deduced that Sam is not as sensitive as Dean is about John, so Sam is the one she can talk to about it:

MARY: Bobby's not open like your dad. SAM: Wait. Like my dad? MARY: Okay. At least he's not like your dad was when I knew him. SAM: Right. MARY: Bobby's got walls, big ones. I just don't know if I can do that if I even ever put myself out there again. (chuckles) I shouldn't be talking to you about this.

///

In Absence, we see a flashback of her being relieved that Sam has more in common with her now: "the parental guilt complex." It seems like the more Sam screws up, the more comfortable Mary gets with him.

This is because Sam's base instinct is to keep his emotions and mistakes abstract, analytical, and vague. It's hard to bond with him until you've gotten to know him well enough for him to share his actual mistakes with you.

In this flashback, Sam admits to not being there for Jack. It's funny, because it's the beginning of a pattern, because as was pointed out to me yesterday, Sam definitely wasn't there for Jack when Jack was soulless. (In fact, Sam ran everyone ragged on little-to-no-sleep. He had another Sammy breakdown, an echo of his season 8 nervous breakdown.)

What Sam is learning is that it's actually really hard to be there for others when you're going through stuff of your own. (Dean and Cas know this; and they try to drag themselves off "the bench" and be there, even when they're in shambles. Sam? Not as much.)

I suspect that this is another way Sam's going to rationalize John's neglectful parenting. Sam wasn't there for Jack because he was mission-focused on finding Dean, just like John was laser-focused on finding Azazel. (Luckily for Sam, Jack is raised by a village, with multiple parents.)

Of course, when she had things to deal with, Mary left, too. And it's okay for Sam to forgive her for that. I'm not saying that it's wrong for people to leave in order to deal with their shit.

It's just...hmmm. Difficult. Sometimes it's bad, sometimes it's worse than bad, and sometimes it's irreparable. Life is hard. You often let people down, even when you're trying your best. Sometimes, like with John, your own mental illness serves up your very worst.

Anyway, it's especially hard on the ones you love, because when you open up to them, you're showing them all the worst parts of yourself and your own weaknesses.

SAM: How's his training coming along? Mary: He's got heart. He'll get there. SAM: I feel bad. I've been so busy looking for Dean-- MARY: Sam, everyone here understands what you've been doing and what you've been putting yourself through. SAM: Yeah, I know, but Jack's been through a lot -- you know, losing his powers. And I haven't really been there for him. Sorry, Mom. I don't mean to lay all this on you. MARY: No. Are you kidding? It's nice knowing I'm not the only one with parental guilt. How much did the two of you go through when I wasn't there for you? And even when Amara brought me back and I got a second chance, things got complicated. I got complicated. I'm just saying parenting is always a struggle. You always feel like you're failing, but then you look at them, and somehow, they're amazing. And somehow, (Mary holds Sam’s face as she speaks to him) they're literally the bravest, kindest, most heroic men on the planet.

///

In the same episode, we see more scenes of her, and we get a sense of her dynamic with each through these vignettes:

Mary sleeping on Dean's shoulder: This shows us that she relaxes around Dean and lets her walls completely down. She gets emotional support from Dean.

This one with Sam (above): she's opening up to him a little bit but when you step back, we see that she's still parenting him, even as she's busy sharing his load and parenting-training Jack. She's reassuring Sam and propping up his bruised confidence. She gives emotional support to Sam.

And finally, Cas: Cas is the one she actually calls for help on a hunt but admits to being a little afraid of (CAS: "Are you still afraid of me?") Interestingly, she covers up her fear by posturing a little around Cas, "It's just a scratch," and "it wasn't that close." It's cute. Still, she gets physical support from Cas. Here, we see she calls him for help, not her boys. In season 12, it was Cas to whom she first revealed her doubts during her bouts of insomnia.

///

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incarnateirony · 2 months

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Are you Hermes

Yes and no, I've explained this a thousand times. Anyone can be Hermes, but you gotta be Not Dumb As Fuck About It. You can, however, structurally mash the hermetics of deep psychology with quantum physics and other adjacent studies like chemistry and make one FUCK of a remix.

The phrase is literally "io pan io pan, I am a Man, Do What Thou Wilt, as A Great God Can."

This is not, however, the same as someone who disappears into roleplay, won't learn a single goddamn thing, and disassociates their every thought as someone else's responsibility until they think anubis is telling them to feed the cat.

Spot the difference.

I am trying to disband a literal cult to me that someone put together cuz they got it all fucked up, no matter how many fucking times I explained this.

Also it's kinda wrong to say "anyone can", it's more like, a fuckton of people can, other people have their own shit that's separate, but I truly do not have the fucking patience to explain metempsychosis to a bunch of people that won't fucking listen anyway.

The crazy bitch got me so mad in so many fucking goddamn timelines by stalking me, whether "this life" or literally people stuck on this same fucking giant clowncell she's done her same driving in reverse, refuse-to-do-the-work bullshit on, like. She never tore down tokyopop or led riots or infested warner brothers or made great work jars, she didn't make gulf connections that landed my fucking glyph at the superbowl. LETS PLAY 8BALL SWEETHEART. So anyway now she gets rent free transmissions from randos dropping in, her extant psychosis demons are no longer hers, and her shadow is on the brink.

The works and actions we take in life change the world, whether or not you take 25 years to understand how to break out of your own brainbox to break into others.

It's about Works. Which is why I have like 20 psych creds, while morons keep stumbling into my inbox because they won't fucking read what I'm saying and trying to argue because they learned how to make a vinegar volcano in middle school. At my daily job I am constantly pulling people from real ledges using this skill while she pisses on pendants charging for shit in my name. But this shit is so loud I'm suddenly attracting all the schizos and they are literally saying shit reflecting my timeline. I am once again having to save her relatives from herself just because I put up the great acme trap house of mirrors to end her BULLSHIT.

If yall are gonna keep blowing by that I Am A Man shit, then at least keep straight that I have a unique identity that is not the same as the great god himself, even if we're all soulstuff and I'm from his grid, okay? So I'm Little Beetle Bro. Little Mazda Bro. My god treats me like a big boy where I get to be myself and drive my own car, doesn't jack the wheel at every opportunity she wants to pretend to be someone else. And he WARNED her about this. I warned her? I don't know. I'm yelling so loud that shit she "heard from him" or whatever is making sense to me now that I'm here, so fuck all whatever, I'm literally cussing this bitch out so loud she's hearing it fifteen years ago under hundreds of millions of eyes.

She kept treating it like a game, I made it one. Little Beetle Bro, creator of the Xorvintaal, Taaldarax, I don't care, make up some fucking name but stop confusing me with him, himself, which is why there is, again, a cult I am trying to disband. Lord Dragon Gamer Glitchtrap says Get Bent, bitch.

I used to blow this bitch's mind with sixth degree work, I was blowing my own mind hitting seventh degree wheel of force by the breakup, and then she threw me, it, and everything out the door, literally everything, and it finished, and this bitch can't even compute what "WELCOME TO THE NINTH DEGREE, BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITCH" means.

and I just moved on to live, but she couldn't let me. Three years of relentless harassment, including from her cult, because the bitch can't accept why she's literally fucking addicted to me and literally groomed her pals into slobbering my knob because she won't process her own fucking grief or choices. Six months trying to hunt down my business investor while we all watched and alerted each other. And eventually, she got so out of pocket, I essentially started alerting myself. So she gave me infinite rent free space in her head with her trying to Persona as me off my shadow, and her fucking resulting schizophrenia is not going to go well from here.

We choose our own path, and who we are, and we choose when we let go or not, for the most part. I walked my road, and she knows she can never do that, and never replicate why that has always been me, and why i am who i am. I am that I am, and that is me, and I'd like her to acknowledge my fucking face, because otherwise, it's going to bury her. Hashtag slenderman real, bitches.

Again, the irony of the trap is, she just has to tell the truth--not just on her blog or whatever, but to herself. The challenge is literally, look at yourself. We're ALL over your beep beep back the fuck uptruck shit, literally across generations, and she KNOWS what I mean when I say that. She backed up all the way into a literal acme trap, and is just spinning now trying to find some way to roleplay or ignore or back up out of it, instead of take the only answer.

Cuz she has this shit too, but she's not me, and not him, and neither of us for fuckin sure are her, and I PROMISE it's actually more scientifically possible for me to drop the collective conscious of fursuit friday on her schizoid mind she tied to me, for her to hear anubis whispering to feed the pets when I realized at like 5 am saturday i forgot to feed the cat before work.

Or you know sure the god of judgment and the dead wanders in like, did u fucking feed precious. Choose your fucking fighter.

Like. This bitch is sooooooooo fucked but she's really only fucking herself, even if she's using the memory of me like a giant vibrator. But she built a castle of lies so deep, she lied to herself until she forgot, and even her versions and retellings are warped from what she knows she knew, but it's like someone that only saw a cat once from behind trying to draw one.

So "Are you hermes" like read above but, the short version is, at least in any kind of record I know of, there's maybe a dozen people or less modernly that have a similar attainment degree, okay? Like technically nobody is this degree, because everybody agrees only He can give the degree, and you do to some extent Become him, but you are still yourself unless you failed in the Babe of the Abyss stage, and then you're just a Black Brother, which is why she's fucking up my balance so bad, she keeps dragging my literal ghost out of the fucking abyss to jack off on top of

Here you guys like Supernatural. She is literally Pissing Off Ghosts In The Empty And Won't Catch A Clue. Literally like durrr y u so mad about your face because it's my fucking identity. It's me, not her, and she won't fucking get off it. And it's one of the few ways you can stay sane while walking the path she REFUSED to learn about before trying to claim to be his preacher. "But he's a shapeshifter" yeah why, bitch. Take a look at the phantom (e)x all over twitter, do the math, and get off my dick. Misha's facial recognition got real weird. Look at the big hole he dug over about four years. It's much deeper now. Taylor Swift is involved again.

Inside joke to the woke, why are we called zebras? Because doctors spend their entire life looking for horses when they're hearing hoofbeats and there was a zebra there the entire time.

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poetryandpainforthemostpart · 2 years

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I've been trying to find a way to come to you for days without coming off wrong. I don't want to hurt you and I don't want to put more on you I know I'm no ot your problem. But I don't know what to do now. I've been so overwhelmed with not only guilt but worry then when I found out about Jack's fear it crushed me having to face that all over again to really sit here and face the fact that I've gone no where I thought I went so far but I'm just the same thing I was. Then finding out that the decisions already been made that our friendship god anything between us was already over and someone decided that for us and I just get to sit here and wait until it's over all over again. I broke down Thursday had to truly come face to face with everything inside of me including him and he was pleasant but god he said so much I don't know where to start said that I was too naive around you and pointed out all the things I should have seen like the fact that the person that caused you to think God was in your head was the same person having these mystical visions of his best friend being a snake but is still going out to do shit with them but you need his blessing for me to be in your life the same person who said that the voices were in his head too but lied the same person that when evertime you'd leave he'd do something say anything and claim to get better but really didn't the same person who pushed you to the point where you checked gun prices and I've just sat here and not faced the fact that the signs are there and the only point of view I have is yours someone who he knows how to get to, like why is he afraid of me is he really or is it just something to use to remove me from you. I can't ignore these things and I know you won't listen to me you've always chosen him and I'm not mad about it I just want you to be safe and I don't know if you will be. I know I'm not important anymore everything we were is over and after this I don't know if you'll ever talk to me again I don't hate him I'm just neutral now. I'm sorry but after today I'm at my end we really did all of that just to separate us any connection we had is broken our short att journey is over you have no reason to do anything with me in mind god we did that just to split us I've felt so off for months I haven't felt welcome since we broke up I feel like such a burden on your life and the signs have been there for so long you wanted us to end the final goodbye the songs about having to leave someone behind in life now with Jack and your mom doing things to remove me I don't want to believe you wouldn't tell me I don't want to believe this has all just been a scheme but you guys were right about the obsessed people I know I'm obsessive and over attached but I never meant for it to hurt you or scare you if you told me to leave I would've I'm so sorry I can live without you please don't worry about me whatever happens to me in my life was inevitable eventually and you shouldn't have to be afraid to leave I know what I said the other night was wrong to say I ways go to far. I'm sorry I never wanted it to be like this I truly do love you and I don't want to lose you but I know I've just killed everything off I've ruined it I don't know if that's what you wanted I don't know I know I over think I know I'm easily paranoid but everything just makes sense I wish I had seen it sooner I feel so betrayed but I don't want to believe it because I never thought it'd be you you were the Eddie to my Benoit I trusted you with everything I hate this I hate all of it

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womenfrommars · 2 years

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About the Russia / Ukraine war : Why aren't we allowed, as Europeans, to help other Europeans ? Why do we have to "welcome" people from non European countries with a very different culture, people who aren't even Europeans themselves ? I don't get it. Y'all act as if middle Eastern refugees have zero asylum options outside of Europe and that's bullshit. Americans, tell me, why don't YOU welcome Pakistani, Afghan, Syrian refugees, instead of lecturing us when we're helping our fellow Europeans in need first ? Ukrainians refugees won't pose any problem because they have the same culture as us. You know why we don't want to have people from the middle East in Europe, especially young males ? Because they grew up in a culture that is the exact opposite of ours. I don't want to be surrounded by men who think women should be locked up in the kitchen with 8 kids, a burqa and a mutilated clitoris. I don't want to have a neighbor that thinks I should be a slave with less rights than a fucking dog and that homosexuals should be decapitated. Does that really make me a bigot?! You take them. Go ahead. Don't complain when you can't go out wearing a skirt without being called a whore. Don't complain when acid attacks become the norm. Don't complain when gay and Jewish people of your city have to move out to avoid being harassed, beaten, even killed. Get out of your stupid little liberal bubble ffs!!!!!

People act as if all refugees are the same but they're clearly not. Ukraine right now isn't allowing males to leave the country, unless they are minors or of old age. Most Ukranian refugees are therefore women and children. However, Middle-Eastern and African refugees are mostly young males. The reason is that in these cultures, it is considered indecent for a (young) woman to travel alone. Families give all the money to one man, who will arrive somewhere safe and will then try to get the rest of the family to come later. It is doubtful to what degree this even happens. Many refugees are rejected so they won't be allowed to get their family to come over via family reunification laws. They are legally obliged to leave the country they applied for asylum in, but often they go to another European country to apply for asylum there (which is illegal according to the Treaty of Dublin). These countries are, coincidentally, also the wealthiest countries in Europe. Ukranian refugees, however, are mostly applying for asylum in Eastern-European countries, which are the closest to them. If they were so-called ''economic migrants'', they would move on to Western-Europe. As of yet, they're not really doing that. This also speaks to their motivations to leave their country. A Middle-Eastern refugee who applies for asylum in Germany will have passed many safe countries along the way, in contrast

It is doubtful to what degree Ukranian culture is similar to (Western) European culture. I'm taking a wild guess and will say I expect many of them to be homophobic. Some Ukranians are Jewish but many Jews also had to leave Ukraine due to anti-Semitism there. As of currently Ukraine is trying to portray itself as a Western nation whereas a week ago nobody considered them Western at all. Zelenski is now a Western hero whereas nobody even knew who he was until a few days ago. The topic of NATO membership is also coming up and even EU membership as well. I think people feel more solidarity when there is a common enemy (in case: Russia). But most people here know jack shit about Ukranian culture, I won't lie. I do expect them to fit in better culturally with other Slavic countries, not so much with Western-European countries. I believe they share the same religion (Christian Orthodoxism) and have some shared history as well. European solidarity is a bit wonky because most Europeans feel connected to their own country first and foremost. This is also a huge problem with the EU. EU elections always gather a lower turnout rate than national elections do. Many people don't have faith in the EU because it feels too far removed from them, and many Europeans don't trust Europeans of other countries. EU politics have been very intense because of the situation in Poland (the EU Commission alleged they broke down their own rule of law). It doesn't help that Belarus and Russia tried to break down the EU by using refugees at the Polish border

All in all I'd rather accept genuine (female) Ukranian refugees than (male) African and Middle-Eastern refugees who are oftentimes just economic migrants. Shoot me

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the-avengers-ate-my-tongue · 3 years

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The Storm

Summary: You work with Jack Crawford and Alana is your cousin, both of you live together for a long time. She gets caught up with a flat tire far away and asks you to let Will in, for he's expecting her. A storm is coming, and she keeps taking longer and longer to show up. Will the universe conspire in your favor?

Pairing: Will Graham x reader

Warnings: swearing, insinuation of smut, fluff.

Word count: 4.328

A/n: I'm starting to consider changing this tumblr for a Hannibal one, mostly Will Graham, so some requests from other fandoms would be nice haha hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing ♥️

*not my gif

There wasn't a thing such as a boring day at the BAU.

At least not when you're part of Jack Crawford's crew. There was always an interesting case to focus on, a disfigured body to study the reason of death, it was always a thrilling hunt for evidence. The best experience I've ever had so far in my career, and I could only thank my cousin Alana for putting me on the Guru's radar. I was a great crime scene investigator, albeit a little younger than people gave me credit for. I taught people not to underestimate me over the years, though. I got here by my own effort, being a tenacious, hard-working woman who wouldn't get a no for an answer.

I got along well with my crewmates, Beverly Katz, Brian Zeller and Jimmy Price, though our relationship hardly extended for life outside work. Except for Beverly, we went out for a couple of beers sometimes, she was fun, witty and I really liked our conversations. Jack was the big boss, and that was it. I had a lot of respect for him, and I knew he didn't regret bringing me to his team, I could see it in his eyes in the first case I've got. I was very cunning when I shared my insights about the cases, sometimes I saw things no one else could, no one but…

Of course, I was far, far away from being a Will Graham. But ever since I was younger, I've had this sort of intuition that helped me to solve problems, I would solve riddles easily and when people asked me how I got to the answer, I wouldn't know the steps, I just knew deep in my bones I was right. That happened a lot when I was growing up and was even stronger now that I knew how to use it. It was some artifice of my inconscient, something I could always count on. It included everything in my life, math, logical thinking, riddles. My brain picked things I couldn't perceive clearly, bringing them to the clear waters of my conscience.

Will Graham was a curious man. He intrigued me from the very first moment I saw him at the house of one of the last victims of The Minnesota Shrike, Garret Jacob Hobbs, now dead. He was practically hiding in a corner, his eyes closed behind the lens of his glasses, dark wavy hair, jawline for days. He seemed highly focused until Beverly started to talk to him, pulling him out of his daze. He could barely look at her, or at me, and although he looked socially awkward and troubled, he still managed to look like a daydream. I studied every inch of his face, lowering my gaze when he seemed to get uncomfortable, after smiling lightly. I was a bit shy myself. I lived with Alana and, when I got home that night, I absentmindedly asked her about that curious handsome man who seemed to be out of place, yet so connected to that scene. She started to talk about him, but stopped once she noticed my interest. Then, she told me he was a very unstable person, that she wouldn't even be alone in the room with him because of her professional curiosity. As time passed and he solved more and more cases, I could see how people looked at him like an attraction of the zoo. However, not me, and later, not Beverly. Brian didn't seem to like him very much, I could see. Envy, perhaps? Nevertheless, the more I saw Will, the more intrigued I got. He avoided eye contact like the plague, but as I was always friendly and tried my best to treat him like a normal person, not focusing only on work, dead bodies and serial killers, I saw more of those beautiful blue eyes. He knew I was Alana's cousin, and I sooner realized he had a fling for her.

And boy, did that break my silly little heart. I wasn't surprised, though. Who could blame him? Alana was amazing. I never felt resentful for that, but as time passed, I started to detach from the idea of Will being somewhat more than a simple acquaintance. That afternoon, I was going home from work when I got a call from Alana.

"Speak fast, I'm driving." I said, keeping one hand on the wheel and the other holding my phone.

"You're going home? Great. I invited Will so we could talk about a profile I'm building, but I got caught up here. I already spoke to him, he's almost there, can you let him in? He said he'll wait, and I'll be home in about fifty minutes, no more than that, hopefully." She said in a hurry, and I felt my cheeks burn a little. Will and me? Home alone?

"I…" I hesitated, chewing my bottom lip nervously. "You won't be long, right? Heard on the radio there’s a storm for later."

"I won't, promise. Just let him in, he's already aware I'll take a little longer to be there. See you soon. Thanks, Y/n!" She hung up, not leaving me any time to answer. I put the phone down, still chewing on my bottom lip. I could feel excitement rising on my stomach, making me feel slightly nauseated, and noticed my hands starting to sweat.

Please. That was ridiculous. What was I, a teenager? I was a grown-up, well-succeeded woman, for God's sake. I rubbed my hands on my jeans, driving a little faster than I usually did almost unconsciously. I got home after twenty minutes, parking outside the pretty house. Will was already there, leaning against his car, so lost in his thoughts he barely noticed I'd arrived. I looked at my reflection at the mirror hurriedly, fixing my hair, pinching my cheeks to look less pale, brushing my eyebrows with my fingers to make them look neat. I wasn't even wearing any lipstick today. It had been a long day at work.

I opened the car door, exiting the vehicle, the noise from shutting the door finally bringing him out of his daze, and he finally seemed to notice me. He smiled lightly, lowering his eyes. He had his glasses on, but as soon as he saw me, he took them off, hanging them on his shirt.

"Hey, Will. I hope I haven't kept you waiting too long. There was a little bit of traffic." I justified, walking to the porch and waiting for him to follow me.

"Y/n. Not at all, I just got here. Alana explained what happened, thanks for coming to let me in. Hope I didn't ruin any appointment you may have had." He waited until I unlocked the door, and we finally were engulfed with the warm air of the heater.

"Nope, I was coming home, no appointments lost. Please, come in. I'm not sure you've ever been here before, but make yourself home." I hung my trench coat, sighing with the pleasure of being home. I loved the atmosphere of that place. "Can I get you anything? Water, soda, beer…"

"Thank you. I'm fine. And no, I haven't been here before." I held back the temptation of saying "good", biting my bottom lip as I watched him sit on the couch. I just stood there for a while, not sure of what to do next.

He frowned a little, probably thinking why I was acting so weird, and that made me nervous, because it was just an easy step to realize my silly crush on him. Did he know? What if Alana said something? Said something? For fuck's sake, he was Will Graham, he could probably see that written across my stupid face! Shit, he knows. I'm making a fool of myself. Why do I even…

"Is everything okay?" His voice startled me a little, pulling me out of my neurotic breakdown, and I wondered how my facial expressions looked. Was I blinking only one eye like the stereotyped madness of cartoons? I certainly didn't look normal. I cleared my throat, laughing lightly.

"Yeah. Yeah, I guess I'm not really used to having people over anymore. I've been working a lot lately. People are dying like flies." I sat on the armchair in front of him, sighing.

"What we do can be overwhelming sometimes. What we see every day. It just… stains you." He said, with a dark look on his serious eyes.

I nodded. I felt that way sometimes, but I was used to it. I stopped feeling that sense of inadequacy on my chest years ago.

"I guess you just begin to cope with it, though. Our brain adapts to that harsh reality. But it's always nice to vent somehow. What do you do in your free time?" I asked, wondering if I was getting too personal. Did I sound like I was probing to ask him out? I felt my face getting warm. Damn it.

Either he didn't realize, or he was just too chivalrous to point, but he didn't mention anything.

"I fish." He said, simply. I nodded with a light smile.

"And you play with your doggies." I pointed, smiling wider. I loved dogs. He'd mentioned them before, so I just brought the subject up, trying to shift the attention from me to them. Will smiled back, his eyes with a subtle glow. He really loved them, and that was so sweet. "Fishing sounds nice. Unfortunately, I could never. I'm too restless. I'd probably startle all the fish and wouldn't catch anything."

He laughed, and that was the first time I ever heard that sound coming out of him. I felt like I was someone deaf that was able to hear the sound of Mozart's symphonies for the first time, and I just knew. There was never detachment from the idea of Will being more than an acquaintance. It was tackled down inside my brain somewhere, for the brain tends to adapt to harsh realities, but it was still there, just waiting for some incentive.

"It's just a matter of training, getting used to it. I could teach you someday… if you want." He blinked a few times, as if he was surprised with his own boldness, smiling lightly. "And you? What do you do to vent?" He asked, seeming genuinely interested.

"Well, I read a lot. Maybe I could read by the riverside while I watch you fish." I said, shrugging with a subtle smile.

"It's a date, then?" Will inquired, making me mortified. Caught me by total surprise, and when I was about to say something, my phone rang.

"Excuse me." I answered the phone. It was Alana. "Hey. We're already here waiting for you."

Not that I wanted her to arrive any time sooner, but she didn't have to know that.

"You won't believe me; I've got a flat tire. There's a guy helping me out, I was lucky, I'm in the middle of nowhere. But I'll get there in about fifty more minutes, more or less. Can you put Will on the phone? I'll explain everything to him."

"Do you need one of us to pick you up? I'm sure he wouldn't mind, I wouldn't…"

"No, he's almost done. Thank you. Let me talk to Will, I'll be there soon. The storm is about to catch me, I wanna hurry."

I sighed, grimacing at him.

"She wants to talk to you." I passed him the phone, studying his expressions while he talked to her. As I looked at the window, I could see the dark clouds gathering up, making the end of the afternoon murky. The storm was about to hit hard. I could see a few thin drops of rain starting to wet the glass.

"I can stay a little longer, no problem. I'm being well attended." He traded looks with me, biting his lip slightly. "Okay. I'll see you soon, Alana."

He gave me the phone, but Alana was already gone. I put it on the coffee table, getting up.

"I think I'll pour myself some wine. Do you want some?" I asked politely. "It's one of the fanciest ones; Hannibal gave us a bottle when we dined at his house a few days ago."

"Yes. Thank you." He waited for me to come back with the beverages, and I did my best not to spill anything, sitting on the couch beside him while I gave him the glass. "So you're acquainted with Dr. Lecter?"

"Oh yeah, he's an old friend of Alana's, sometimes he invites us to dinner. He cooks the best meals I've ever had in my entire life, so I don't exactly decline the invitations. And he's one of the most brilliant people I've ever met, so it's always interesting." I took a sip of the crimson liquid, moaning low in pleasure. Good wine. I preferred a good cup of hot oolong, but it was impossible not to appreciate the quality of that drink.

A few glasses after and a lot of talks about dogs, fishing and other hobbies, he finally felt safe to bring back the topic. The rain had started really pouring, the now thicker drops hitting the windows loudly. Alana hadn't called again. It was nighttime now, the sky seeming to be darker than usual. I was low-key worried about her, but the conversation was too great to interrupt. She was a good driver. She would be just fine.

"I've been seeing Hannibal Lecter in his office. Not exactly his patient, though. A courtesy of Jack Crawford to keep an eye on the coping of my brain functions." He sounded a bit bitter, drinking a few sips of his wine.

I could see he didn't like therapy. Must be hard with someone with a mind like his.

"You know, sometimes, Alana psychoanalyses me. Like, she doesn't even notice. It's cute, but sometimes it creeps me out."

"She has a professional curiosity about me, but she's too polite and considerate to let it slip out. We've never even been alone in the same room together."

I held back a bitter comment, not wanting to talk shit about my cousin, but he saw it right through me.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to put you in a complicated position."

"I know. You're sweet." The word slipped through my tongue before I could contain it. Will blinked a few times, seeming surprised, and I felt my cheeks burn, starting to stutter. "I meant… I'm sorry, did I make you uncomfortable?"

"No, no. It's just… no one's ever called me that before." It was my time to get surprised. He didn't seem to be complimented much, and that just made me flabbergasted. I couldn't be the only one who saw how fantastic Will was.

"... Ah. Well, some people are just shy. I'm shy as hell, don't even know how I had the nerve to say that, it's probably the wine starting to kick in. Hope I really didn't make you uncomfortable, though. Don't need to be polite, it's okay to tell me."

"Actually, I'm curious to know what else you think of me. I sense it's not the only word you have to define me." He sounded bolder, and his eyes were on mine, giving me shivers down my spine.

"Well… I think you're too exceptional to be defined with a few words. You're… Kind, brilliant… I see how seeing what you see, doing what you do, how it wrecks you sometimes, and you just keep doing it because you're saving lives. That's so selfless, Will. That's…" I was going to say more, but at that very moment, a loud thunder just made the house practically tremble, and I let out a real inelegant weep, coming closer to Will and holding his arm firmly, my fingers grabbing on the fabric of his shirt. He could've thought it was an artifice to get closer to him, but he could see how frightened I was, trembling like a cornered wild little beast. I hated thunders, fireworks, anything loud. Feeling ridiculous, I released his shirt, apologizing with embarrassment.

"It's okay. It's just noise. I'm here." He put some of my hair that had fallen to my face behind my ear with such a tenderness that I felt my stomach twitch, realizing suddenly how close we were. He was looking at me as if it was the first time he was actually seeing me.

The phone rang again. Alana! I grabbed it from the coffee table, turning to face Will. He wasn't avoiding eye contact anymore, his pupils were dilated. My breathing was accelerated, and I knew it had little to do with the thunder.

"Lana, is everything okay?" I asked with genuine concern. "Are you close?"

"Ah, Y/n. I'm so sorry. I don't think I'll make it in time, I'm driving slow, the roads are slippery because of the storm and it's pretty foggy. I'll stop at a motel and spend the night, or at least wait for the storm to pass. I'm so furious with myself!"

"It's okay cuz, do what's safer for you. I'm sure Will will understand. I'll pass him the phone." I gave him the phone and he talked to Alana for a few minutes, but I wasn't listening. She'd ruined the moment unintentionally, and now he was probably going home. When would I have an opportunity like that again?

"Okay. Don't worry. I'll see you tomorrow. Bye, Alana. Take care." He gave me the phone and I put it on the coffee table again. Before any of us could say anything, another thunder cracked the sky, and this time, Will held me so I wouldn't be afraid. The lights went out, and he held me against his chest protectively, making me smell his aftershave and some perfume. He smelled so good. For a moment, I just stood there in his arms, feeling his warmth, his breath, the steady beats of his heart.

I moved away just a little to see his face, very close to mine, but it was so dark I could only see shadows. A lightning lit up the room and, just for a little moment, I could see his gorgeous eyes staring at me. After a soft touch of his thumb on my lips, he finally kissed me, so gentle, like I could break as fine china with any rougher move. I touched his neck with both my hands, playing with his hair, feeling how soft they were. He pulled me closer, his hands on my waist, and the kiss started to get deeper, voracious, as if we were hungry for each other. Maybe the wine was helping to raise the lust; all I know is that I've wanted that to happen for a long time. Will's kiss was everything I imagined it would be, but entirely different at the same time. All I could say was that he was great at it. His hands traveled through my body, and I grabbed his hair, pulling it slightly. That made a low growl echo through his chest, and I started to feel my body fervent as a bonfire.

I couldn't say much because I was breathless and I didn't want to stop what we were doing, so a single word left my lips as I kept my forehead on his.

"Stay."

Will bit his lip, kissing me again, and that was all the answer I needed.

Morning. Thin sunrays illuminated my bedroom floor through the curtains, waking me up. The storm was gone. I haven't had a nice night of sleep like that in ages. I looked at the other side of my bed and there was Will, sleeping heavily. It wasn't a dream, after all. Last night really happened. I smiled, staring at the roof with disbelief in my eyes.

I stared at him for a few seconds, unsure of what to do. Should I just let him sleep? He looked so heavenly, his hair was messy, his breathing steady, he seemed so less troubled than he usually was. I touched his hair lightly, caressing it with tenderness, and he started to move. I could see his neck, and a few hickies we marked on his albescent skin. That made me blush a little bit, and I laughed silently.

He opened his eyes while I still touched his hair, but I didn't stop, and he didn't seem to want me to. We stared at each other in silence for a few moments, and he smiled, a different smile than the usual ones he gave me.

"Hi." He said, pulling me closer by my waist, stroking the skin under the sheets. I pecked him on the lips, then kissing his forehead, his cheek, his jawline.

"Hey there. Good morning. I'm starving, are you having breakfast with me?"

"Actually, I gotta go home. Feed the dogs." He said, stroking my nude shoulder with his finger.

"Of course. Your dogs. I won't keep you then, poor babies must be so hungry." I kissed his cheek and was about to get up when he pulled me again, gently kissing my lips. I smiled, probably looking like an idiot. A joyful idiot. "I'll let you get dressed. I'll be in the kitchen."

I dressed up in my long and black robe, smiling at him before I left the room, going to the kitchen, where I started to make some french toasts. After a few minutes, I heard the front door open, and an exhausted Alana came in, her hair frizzy and her coat looking still a bit wet.

"Oh, Lana! Go change, you'll get a cold!" I stopped what I was doing, going to her and helping to take off her coat.

"That storm was a nightmare. I swear I won't ignore the warnings ever again. I'm so sorry, I had no idea it would get this bad, yesterday was one of those days where everything just goes wrong. Hope Will arrived well at home, did he seem disappointed or annoyed before he left? I was so inconvenient…"

I didn't even have time to answer, because Will opened my bedroom door, coming out while buttoning his shirt, suddenly realizing Alana was there.

"Oh." Alana said, looking so flabbergasted I almost laughed at her. Will rose his eyebrows at the sight of her, seeming a bit unsure of what to do or say. I wasn't planning for her to find out like this, it was a bit early, I wasn't expecting her to arrive so soon. "Hi, Will."

"Alana. Hi." He avoided looking at her, staring at me, and his eyes immediately softened. I smiled, he smiled back, and that was it, Alana was forgotten.

"Off you go to feed your children." I joked, biting my bottom lip. "I guess I'll see you later, then."

"Definitely." He simply said, kissing my forehead while caressing my hair, certainly a little embarrassed to kiss me in front of Alana. "See you later, Y/n. Bye, Alana."

"Bye, Will." I waved with a soft smile, and he grabbed his jacket, leaving the house.

My smile grew larger and I left my head fall back, squeaking low in commemoration. What a night! What a morning! I never thought I would thank a storm so much, let alone a bloody thunder.

Before Alana could say anything, I realized Will had left his glasses at the coffee table, and I picked it up in a hurry, bursting through the front door and calling him before he left, waving in front of the car.

"You forgot your glasses!" I said, and he opened the car windows, raising his hand to pick them.

I leaned against the car window, putting the glasses on him, and kissing his lips fiercely. He moaned in surprise, holding my face to deepen the kiss. After a moment, I pulled away, appreciating the view of his lips so reddish.

"Go back inside, it's cold." He said with a cheeky smile, and before I could say he actually made me hotter, he took off with the car.

I went back inside, where Alana was waiting for me with her arms crossed.

"What the hell did you do to Will Graham?" She asked, sounding severe, but a smile was trying to escape her lips "I mean, besides trying to suck his soul with your mouth a few moments ago."

"Oh, shut up!" I laughed, blushing violently. "You made that happen, you know? Thank you. Was that a set up or did the universe actually conspire in my favor?"

"I wish I'd planned this. That would mean I would've had a plan b and I wouldn't have stayed at that disgusting mote… Y/n, you're full of hickies, I can't believe you!"

"You're starting to sound like my mom, Lana. I'm gonna wear a turtleneck, don't worry, I don't want Beverly all over me like a bloodhound and Brian and Jimmy's witty comments today. In fact, keep it to yourself, okay? Will's discreet. I won't even tell Beverly, if she finds out, the whole bureau will know, hell, maybe even Freddie Lounds."

"I told you to let it go, Y/n. Will's very unstable right now. I… I only want what's best for you." She said with concern in her bright blue eyes. I sighed, walking to her and kissing her cheek with affection.

"You're a good cousin. But I'm a big girl. I can take care of myself, okay? Unless this isn't only about me, unless it concerns something else." I raised an eyebrow while staring at her, more confident that I've ever been. "Is there something you wanna tell me?"

She hesitated, clenching her jaw, but never spoke.

I smiled, tapping her cheek very lightly in approval.

"I gotta get ready to work. Wanna grab lunch with me later?" I asked in a casual tone, a cynical smile on my face. She shrugged. "See you later then, cuz."

#hannibal #hugh dancy #mads mikkelsen #will graham #will graham headcanon #will graham imagine #hannibal imagine #will graham x reader #alana bloom #alana bloom imagine #jack crawford #beverly katz #hannibal fanfic #hannibal fanfiction #hannibal headcanon #will graham oneshot

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bluecookies02 · 4 years

Text

Dom!Twice x Reader

summary: Jin and you bumped into each other khm, the attraction evident coming from both sides. Despite you being a hero you can't resist him and you end up together in a hotel room.

->While this wasn't a previously discussed dynamic, Twice is just being rough but its consensual nonetheless. Take care of your Doms/Partners on each occasion, even while having one night stands, someone might need you💕

⚠️warnings⚠️ : voyeurism (two people watching and jacking off /it's a dirty hotel room why r u surprised), degradation, spanking, facefuck, female eating out a male, threesome (with a clone), rough to gentle (twice is a sweetheart and needs to be loved), unprotected sex/creampie.

A/N: this was a paid 6k word commission however for a male!reader (during a blm protest) and much more filthy and taboo but taking from the messages and triggered ppl in my asks and on wattpad, some ppl aren't comfortable with extreme topics so i won't be posting the full story (fuck it i added Jin sucking a guy off... i had to) because the "hate" I get makes me rly insecure about some kinks. Also Jin sucks a guys dick here. Be warned. It's wholesome tho.Kinda.

edit:male version here-> http://www.archiveofourown.org/works/25896667?view_adult=true

Sry for the long intro, enjoy.

✼ •• ┈┈┈┈๑⋅⋯ ୨˚୧ ⋯⋅๑┈┈┈┈ •• ✼

You've been strolling down the streets in hopes of getting back home before the curfew, not having the strength or the luxury to get caught by the cops.

Moving through familiar streets, you found yourself wondering off to today's events, the protests thankfully not becoming too dangerous and hazardous, making your heart flush in small victory.

Your attention was snapped back to reality as you heard a familiar gagging sound, and a loud, angry groan followed after it. Your eyes darted to the source of the filthy sounds, gulping once you managed to make out two bodies in the dark. A blonde-haired man choking on a fat black cock as what's supposedly spurts of cum coated his throat. The semen slowly spilled down the blonde’s lips and the tall man above him pulled the blonde up by his hair. The black man dipped his finger into the blonde’s mouth and glided it on his tongue, smearing the sticky liquid before connecting their lips before disappearing around the block.

His hooded eyes turned to look at you, a satisfied smirk forming on his lips.

Gulping down the cum down his throat, he wiped the corner of his mouth with the back of his hand before slowly walking to your frozen form.

He reached for your hand, smiling brightly before introducing himself to you.

"Name's Jin, It's really nice to meet you," he said, looking you up and down, tongue swiping along his bottom lip.

"Y/N, I'm sorry for interrupting" a chuckle left his lips as he shook your hand.

"Oh none of that, I should be thanking you, it tripled my fun..you here for the protests, right?" you nod, your hand falling back down.

"I am. You support them?"

"In my own way apparently, now let's go, we have 5 minutes, I know a hotel nearby" he rushed out, motioning for you to follow.

You stared in confusion before realization hit you, quickly checking the time before rushing off to catch up with him.

He fumbled with his wallet, going to the register and dumping a few crumbled bills on the counter.

The hotel was dirty and smelly, the furniture in the waiting hall dusty and probably washed a decade ago.

"You can wait here until we prepare the room, with this money, you leave at 6 am sharp." the guy behind the counter rang for the staff, sending them off to unlock the room and change the sheets( at least that will be clean )

Jin and you sat on the dusty couch, him already familiar and comfortable, spreading his legs and laying back.

He fumbled with his lighter and the pack of cigarettes from his pocket.

The crappy hotel was full of people rushing in and out of their rooms, borrowing/stealing stuff from one another, and when you took note of it, it looked more like a homeless shelter.

You wondered how many times did he stay in here, maybe even lived here.

"So...you don't like heroes huh?"

"Pft, I resent all people equally...though I make exceptions for those with a fat ass" he mumbled, straining his neck to look you up.

"And you pass the requirements" he laid back down, choking out the cigarette on the couch.

The maid came back shortly, giving you a key and directing you to a room on one of the top floors.

You pressed the elevator button, Jin following you suit as he stood close to you.

You turned your eyes to the numbers on the elevator suddenly interested in the worn-out digits on the metal buttons.

"You know, now that you're standing in this light, you look tasty all over..." his hot breath ghosted over your neck, his arm slipping down to clutch at your hip, pulling you against him.

"And you're so small I could eat you all up...push you down and pound into that fat pussy of yours."

his hand moved lower, grabbing a handful of your cheeks and kneading them in his palms.

You made no move to stop the man, the thought of the elevator opening as he was about to slip his hand in your pants made you swallow a lump in your throat, your cunt throbbing as you imagined the look on whoever was unlucky enough to stumble upon the two of you.

"You look so committed to your little acts of bravery, let's see how committed you are to sucking a cock" the elevator door opened, the floor you reached empty.

His hand tangled in your locks, pushing you out into the hall and forcing you to your knees.

His musky scent filled your nostrils as he pushed you against his clothed bulge, rubbing your face against a wet spot damping his sweats.

"I'm not gonna teach you how to do it, it's not gonna bite" he snarled, watching the way your hand reached up to pull at his sweatpants.

"That's a smart girl, go ahead" he hummed in approval, his hips jerking forward as you grabbed the front of his sweats, tugging the material along with his boxers.

His length hooked on his clothes, snapping up with a quiet "pop" sound as you finally had the opportunity to see it in all its glory.

From the way his cock bulged in his restraints a second ago, you were already drooling at the imagination of it, the situation you were in also adding to your excitement, thinking if some weird lowlife creep could be watching the two of you from the dark.

You gave a teasing pump, your fist tightening around his shaft as he bucked his hips into your hand.

This man was definitely packing, your thighs clenching at the thought of it plowing in and out of your throat.

He watched you carefully, adoring the way your eyes glistened in hunger. Reaching a hand to hold it around your own that was wrapped at the base of

his cock, he guided his member along your lips, his other hand still keeping your head in place.

His wet cock prodded at your lips, your willing mouth stretching around him as he slowly pushed in all the way, your nose mushing against his navel as he removed both hands from his shaft.

You gagged around him, the urge to cough burning in your chest before he pushed you off to the tip.

Spit piled up in your mouth, slicking up his arousal, making it easier to slip right back in. Your nails dug in his hips, holding onto him as he rocked shallow thrust into your constricting throat. You tried your best to loll your tongue out, gliding it against the ridges of his member making him hum in pleasure. You began bobbing your head on your own, timing it with his thrusts as you tried to hold your breath in for a bit longer.

He pulled you off his cock completely, letting you catch a quick puff of air before sinking back in, continuing his assault on your mouth.

You slurped around him, a mess dripping down your lips and onto the floor as your spit dripped over his balls.

"That's a good cocksleeve...you really want someone to catch us huh...if you don't I advise you to try and keep the slurping down" he warned, rocking into you with more speed.

You only got louder, purposefully gagging and moaning as he fucked your face.

His thrusts were now timed and fast, each time almost pulling out before slamming back in, giving you hardly a second to time your breaths.

He smirked, biting his lip as he watched you gasp for air each time he blessed you with an opportunity.

His pubes were messy and long, tickling your nose as you closed your eyes, trying to focus on not losing too much air, already imagining his heavy taste on your tongue.

Your jaw ached and your throat was starting to go numb, begging in your head for him to cum already.

You whimpered and whined as he squeezed your cheeks around his cock, the additional friction of his fingers dipping into your flesh and rubbing against his member making him throw his head back.

"That's it, that's a good little slut...come one swallow around my cock, I want to feel you clench around it"

You did as you were told, gulping down around him, drinking in his sour precum and strings of heavy saliva.

You spread your knees, sinking lower, your aching pussy rubbing against the dirty hotel carpet, still fully covered by your pants.

"Oh, you get off on this too much you filthy shit...who knows who stepped foot on that disgusting rug..."

he all but whispered, finally stilling your head flush into his pubes, the veins on his cock twitching before warm liquid slid into the back of your throat, making you gush and cough around his length, him not pulling out until his cock stopped throbbing, only pushing deeper against you as you struggled to stay still.

Finally, he realizes his grip from your locks, letting you detach from his cock with a disgusting mix of a gag and groan. He cupped your chin with his palm, collecting anything that escaped your mouth and pushing in right back in, watching it dance on your tongue as he kept your mouth open.

"Really...I give you my cum and you have the guts to spit it out...what a shame." he roared, collecting some spit in his mouth before adding it to the mix in your own.

"Swallow." And you did, your sore throat hurting from the large gulp you took in.

"I'm gonna fuck you real good...you seem to like that carpet a lot..." he hooked his arms around you, spinning you and then throwing you face-first into the floor.

Your pants and panties are pulled down to your knees, your legs tied together as you brace yourself on your elbows.

"What, Jin? Is my pussy that-" you're tumbling forwards on your cheeks, the rug burning your chin as Twice slaps your ass.

"I don't like it when you talk, toys don't talk" with that he spat at your hole, prodding two of his fingers making your scream in pain, feeling like losing consciousness before coming back to your senses once you feel a weight on your face.

Jin's foot is pressing you down on the floor, his dirty boot mushing your face as he fingers you.

What you don't see is the two dudes on the far end of the hall watching the way your squirm for his cock.

Jin takes note of them, sending them a threatening but a teasing look, purposefully pushing his knuckles deep in your cunt. Your groan out, rutting your hips in his hold as you beg for him to give you more, finally used to the sudden stretch.

"Oh they sure are jealous of me don't ya think?" you struggled to snap your head back and see who he's talking about, the heel of his shoes pushing even harder against your skull. You grind your ass back, giving it a meaningful wiggle to show off to whoever he's talking about.

"C'mon Jin, don't let them wait, they'll think you don't know how to actually fuck" your cunt is filled with one well snap of his hips, not letting you comprehend how fast his fingers left your body or how fast was his hand now wrapped around your neck, both of his knees now settled between your thighs, pushing them further apart so your back arches down, your pants thrown off of your ankles somewhere around the hall.

You hiss at the roughness of his thrusts as you feel a hand covering your mouth.

"As much as I want to hear you scream and beg, you have too much of a bratty mouth to be left alone". One of his fingers dipped between your lips, letting you bite down on it as he pounded into you, his face never leaving the two intruders as he watched them rub their cocks over their pants.

They don't have the guts. They could never make you feel so good and wanted. They wouldn't know what to do if a delicious pussy like yours hit them in the face.

Both of his hands are on your head as he plows in and out of you, his hips slapping against your thighs, making perfect leverage to bounce against you.

You're trying your best to keep up, your arm reaching beneath youto flick at your clit.

Jin's kinda lost in the way your hips bounce, losing himself in the rhythm as you hear him mumbling incoherent words into his chin.

You don't have the time to pay attention to it, too lost in the way your pussy is being stretched and used.

You heard a snicker from the far end of the hall, a line of disgusting remarks as they whispered about recognizing Jin from the news, apparently "recognizing his disgusting stitched up forehead" comparing him to Frankenstein and other monstrous creatures.

You knew they were just boiling with jealousy, unable to get any as they were left to only masturbate as the two of you literally couldn't wait to enter your room that was only a few meters away.

"Oh I'm fucking you so good, you look really pretty with my cock in your cunt" "I'm so fucking disgusting, they should lock me up and leave me to rot"

He's not looking at those creeps anymore, his mind struggling as his hold on you loosens.

His thrusts are slowing down, your knees trembling as you have to come back down from the intense pace from seconds ago.

You pick yourself up, looking at Jin as he hides his head into his hand.

This must've been what he thought about when he talked about people not helping him fight his fights, judging and mocking even in these absurd situations, not even letting the man fuck in peace.

You reached for his hand, him flinching on instinct when your fingers tangle with his.

His eyes hold panic in them, aimlessly looking around as he bites his lip in order to stop words coming from his mouth.

While you loved being manhandled, what you loved even more is making people feel safe, so you wasted no time in picking up the keys and your clothes, sending a wink at those jerks as you pulled Jim into the room.

"My face, cover my face...it's gonna-" you closed the door behind you, sitting Jin onto the bed as you tried to see what's going on with him.

You sat yourself on his lower belly, leaning down to cup his face in your hands, leaning your forehead against his.

"Sorry handsome, but if anyone stormed in and saw me putting a pillowcase over your face, I don't think they would hold back on calling the cops..."

His eyes struggled to stay closed, his breaths deep and pained. You didn't know this man for long, but there was something really fucked up going on with his head. Your lips caught his, pushing your tongue in his mouth as you wrapped your legs around his back.

"That's good, you're a really tough guy c'mon...open your eyes for me." He did, his pupils trying to adjust to the pitch-black room.

"I know I might be butt ass naked and you literally have your cock out, but I'm willing to listen "

And you do...listening to him remble out all of the self-hatred he feels, degrading himself as he struggles to make sense of the biased sentences pouring out of his mouth.

"I'm only good for a quick fuck, that's the only thing I can somewhat do right" while indeed you really looked forward to getting your guts rearranged, you found yourself involved in this man, deciding to be the first person to show him kindness and passion.

You made him lay on his back, seating yourself between his legs as he covered his face with a pillow, his ramblings never coming to a stop.

"Hey...You're not gonna split, see... I'm right here" you said reaching your arms to place on each side of his hips.

"Have you ever tried doing something that feels good for you...apart from literally fucking my throat...but you know...letting someone treat you?” you asked, kissing along his chest as you awaited his response.

He shook his head no, head poking over the pillow, his mind focusing on your moves.

You nodded, leaving light kisses along his salty skin.

"The reason those assholes kept talking must've been because they were jealous of your ass, I'm sure of it" you stated matter of factly before dipping your head to kiss at his thighs.

"I don't think that's-" "Fuck yeah, I'd eat it myself if I had the chance" you chuckled at his response, wrapping your hand around his length as you dipped your tongue down his balls.

"Yeah...I'll have to agree with the second one...everyone would, if given the chance, how convenient" your wet tongue prodded at his hole, dipping in only slightly before coming back up to his cock, licking up a heavy strip along his veins as you heard him swallow.

You slammed your face back into his ass, moving your hands from spreading his cheeks further apart to grabbing his hips as you pulled yourself into him. Sticking your tongue out you began licking up and down his hole as you continued to grind your face against his backside, reveling in the smell and taste of it.

"Yeah, lick that ass you whore, you take it so well..." his hand covered his mouth in surprise, eyes wide as you looked up.

You were breathing in deep, licking hungrily, everywhere, every inch of his exposed puckered skin, your hand now giving lazy strokes to his cock.

You close your eyes, enjoying the rhythm his body swayed in against you, all but riding your face as he struggled not to speak.

You continue applying pressure with your tongue, getting deeper, centimeter by centimeter. As you are applying pressure with your tongue you press your lips around his ass and make open-mouthed kissing motions, effectively massaging the area around his hole with your full lips.

The pleasure he felt made him feel all that more guilty, eyes squinting as he tried to think.

Maybe he could do it, he's just gonna make one... He won't get lost...he knows who he is...you know who the real Jin is, you have to know.

You feel a light push at your hole, struggling to look back as Jin's hand keeps you squashed against his hairy hole.

"Clones, I make clones" he tries to explain in a hurry, his head buzzing up again once you hum against his crack.

"Ooh that's a pretty little hole, you sure that's for me boss?" a voice quite similar to Jin's sound from being you, rubbing the tip of his flush cock against you.

As Jin doesn't respond, your balance is interrupted, your face suffocating between his thighs.

"Oh she's so tight boss, you sure you don't want some of this?" the clone asks mockingly, his hips snapping forwards with great force, each thrust feeling like a completely new one as he pulls all the way out, making irregular pauses to keep you guessing about when will you get his cock again.

You try to snicker a bratty remark but you don't manage to detach from Jin as the clone begins to shove his heavy cock in and out of you.

"Disgusting little cunt do you have here...it's making a mess of my pretty cock...how filthy" he scolds, his palm meeting with your flesh, stinging sensation burning up through your body.

One of your fingers slips pass your tongue, making Jin's soft walls twitch as you pump the digit slowly.

"Damn boss, you let her play you like that?" the clone mocks, grinding your ass against his dick.

Jin doesn't respond as you push more fingers in, stretching him open as you bounce against the clones cock, your clit pink and puffy since you still didn't get to cum.

Jin's close, his breath hitching in his throat as you abuse the soft patch of flesh in his ass, your tongue still silking up the fingers plowing into him.

Your hand speeds up on his cock, small pumps focusing on his tip as you urge for him to release.

His clone is now still inside you as he looks at Jin, smirking once he sees him spurting ropes of cum into your hand, white liquid pooling in your fist as you continue to stroke him, your fingers pressed snuggly in his hole.

Jin takes a moment to catch his breath, his copy waiting for his orders as he takes your hands away from him.

He finds his place beside you, reaching his hand to flick at your clit.

The clone sets a brutal pace, Jin's palm securing against your clit as you rut into it.

"Yeah, make me cum, make me cream all over, c'mon" you spur them on, fisting the sheets as the bed creeks from the three of you.

Jin watches in aww as you lose yourself on the clone's cock, violently meeting the thrusts and chasing Jin's fingers.

"Good slut, you're gonna cum when I fill up your ass c'mon"

The clone goes feral, his hands kneading and digging into your fat, groaning and praising the way your ass sucks him up, his thrusts sloppy and uneven as he chases his release.

Just as the first wave of warm liquid fills your pussy up, you're clenching down on his cock, Jin's hand flicking in a hurry as he stares at your blessed out face. Your hips are jerking and trashing as the final throb of your cunt ruins the sheets, the clones cock slipping out to stare at your contracting hole, the soft flesh spasming around nothing.

Jin eventually lays down, pulling your body next to his as the clone leaves, rubbing your back in soothing circles.

"I...thanks" he whispers in your hair, reaching for the covers as he drapes them over both of you.

He'll be seeing you again.

i remember telling someone i won't be doing twice soon but...commission is a commission and the idea also caught my attention

___________

Requests:closed

commission:open (1 slot)

Ko-fi link is in my bio💕

#mha fanfiction #twice x reader lemon #twice x reader #villan x reader #bnha #mha #jin x reader lemon #jin bubaigawara x reader #jin x reader

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hotchley · 3 years

Note

i saw your reblog of the Spencer giving Aaron a father's day card thing and i can't stop thinking about how Aaron is the father figure to the entire team now.

(yes I'm also especially thinking about that one scene of Spencer and Derek stuck in the malfunctioning lift shrieking for Aaron just because. 🥴 dad!Hotch ftw!!!!!)

i know this concept has probably been done hundreds of times already but imagine: (SORRY THIS IS GOING TO BE A REALLY LONG ASK, I deeply apologise in advance)

[tw food/eating habits, some references to murder cases because you know this is Criminal Minds, some slight spoilers for people who haven't really watched the show and also reference & mention of autism & a character on the autism spectrum -> just a heads up, a disclaimer, I'm in no way diagnosed with autism, so if i have misrepresented autism, or made any mistakes, i apologise, it wasn't my intention, and i welcome all feedback & criticism — i genuinely want to learn]

a year after Spencer joins the BAU, Aaron notices & becomes very concerned over Spencer's (super bad) eating habits aka him only drinking coffee and forgetting to eat actual proper food when he gets absorbed in cases or research or reading etc -> which results in Aaron absolutely being like "hey Spencer let's grab lunch together" almost everyday just so Spencer eats (healthy, full meals)

(also Spencer picking up on this after Aaron "casually" gets him lunch/treats him to dinner/invites him over for meals for almost every day of the week and he was initially almost irritated/offended until he realised he could use Aaron's habit to make Aaron himself eat properly too because this hypocritical bastard doesn't eat properly himself either so every alternate day you can see Spencer purposely not going for lunch breaks while sneaking glances at Aaron's office just waiting for him to notice and drag them both to lunch together 😌)

also I really think Spencer is on the autistic spectrum (high functioning, imo, but I'm not really sure how this works, and I'd have to do more research) so I'd like to imagine Aaron knows that too because he's noticed Spencer's behaviors + Spencer got an official diagnosis and told him about it maybe 6-7 months into joining the BAU so I really think Aaron lets Spencer stim (physically, his hand gestures) on their lunch break because he knows that Spencer can't really do that in front of the others, so even when they're on cases, he would take Spencer out either for a private lunch or dinner or something, just the two of them, and he'd let Spencer stim & talk about any subject of his fancy as much as he wants to (I'm pretty sure someone wrote a fic like this and I absolutely can't remember the name or the author but I really LOVED the idea too)

initially Spencer was really taken aback too, because you know, this isn't something you do with your boss, of all people, but Hotch had always meant what he says and his facial expression and body language suggested that he was being absolutely sincere and serious about this, so Spencer tentatively started talking, and as their meal progressed, he eventually got comfortable enough to just go on, and not once did Aaron cut him off rudely, until the end of their meal, when Aaron couldn't continue to pretend to drink his soup because he'd finished it somehow with those incredibly small spoonfuls, and he'd had to gently tell Spencer that they had to go back, but Spencer wasn't upset, because he'd just got over an hour to talk about this recent seminar about the connection of ancient Greek mythology to the developments of the society in ancient Greece which no one had ever done for him before and he's full, satisfied and beyond elated because Hotch really didn't have to do this, but he did anyways

at first it was just something between them but eventually Derek noticed & like in the end I think it's a kind of open secret between Aaron, Spencer & Derek and now when Derek notices Aaron doing it he gives Aaron a small nod and he wards off & deals with the questions that the others have when they inevitably notices the private meals Aaron & Spencer has

speaking of Derek, Aaron definitely has 1 on 1 time with Derek too, but doing different things. Derek's thing is sports & home renovations, and he repairs/maintains cars & bikes when he can, and I like to imagine Aaron knowing about his hobbies and casually asking Derek about the home renovation he's working on one time (before or early S1) Derek came into his office to submit a case file, and Derek being kind of shocked/caught by surprised initially (because he knows Hotch has a soft spot for the kid because he's much younger and much, much more inexperienced but Derek's older and should know better, so Hotch won't do the whole private lunch thing with him, right?) but then he grins and starts telling Aaron about how "I got that place absolutely shining right now, man" and then he invites Aaron over to take a look at the place out of courtesy/habit (his mama raised him as a good, polite young man, and no way Hotch would even say yes right?) and to his surprise once again, Aaron does accept his invitation

after that one time, Aaron begins casually asking him about his projects and even starts offering to help him do some of the painting and decorating (to be fair, it calms Aaron too, to have a getaway from Haley and initially from the crying baby, because while he absolutely loved Haley and Jack with all his heart, some days, some days he just couldn't take it, all the stress from Strauss and from trying to be a good father unlike his own, and he had to take some time off to himself, and painting walls is calming and therapeutic to him in some sense) & Derek and Aaron start bonding over hotdogs while sitting out on the front porch of some halfway remodelled house, talking about the latest sports news (they support different baseball teams but that's okay, because Derek gets to grin at Hotch and ask him to pay up when Hotch's team loses to his, and Aaron gets to raise his eyebrows with that small knowing smirk of his and ask Derek to "complete this by the next weekend, will you" when Derek's team loses to his)

when Aaron recruits Penelope, he's read her file, or what little the FBI's cyberteam got on her anyways. he knows the Black Queen's reputation, and he knows that the cyberteam really don't trust her and recommended high levels of surveillance, but the moment he saw her through the glass of the interrogation room and her resume & application on pink paper, he knew that she's not just what the file said she is. initially, she sticks to the "bureau regulated office attire" because you know, Penelope knows she's lucky, she should've been jailed for what she did, she was jailed, until this Aaron Hotchner guy decided, somehow, that she was deserving to be on his team, even after looking at her resume, which she had written on pink paper out of pure spite (because nothing in the FBI rulebooks said anything about submitting your application on specialized coloured paper anyways) but she was moody and unhappy because she's stuck in this tiny office having to answer the phone whenever agents called to ask for details on icky, gruesome murders and disgusting, vile murderers so she decides that hey, since no one ever comes in here anyways, she might as well do some re-decorating right? so she starts bringing in her own soft toys and figurines and starts amassing a whole collection of soft, plushy, and colourful toys in because it's her office and if she has to deal with all these yucky stuff on a daily basis she's going to make it at least bearable to be in here

one day, some tall, stern looking guy just comes into her office with this Tupperware in his hands saying "hey, Garcia right? my wife made some extra cupcakes for the team, you want some?" and she asks "do i know you?" and he blinks, stands there for one, two seconds before- "sorry, i forgot we haven't actually met. Special Supervisory Agent Aaron Hotchner, assistant unit chief of BAU Team 1, nice to meet you," [i like to headcannon that before Boston & all, Hotch was Gideon's assistant, some kind of assistant unit chief probably, but while he wasn't yet the unit chief he was definitely taking care of most, if not all of the administration matters i.e. hiring new agents etc already because let's be real Gideon is caring & capable but really hands off sometimes (also in S1E1 Derek referred to Gideon as their Unit Chief so I assumed Hotch took over the position full time, officially somewhere between S1E1 and S1E2 or 3)]

and then Garcia's brain kind of short-circuits because holy shit this is her BOSS, aka the guy who somehow, crazily looked at her resume and decided to HIRE her and she just asked him if she knew him OH GOD ALL THOSE FIGURINES- and she tries to explain because she really didn't mean to break any rules with them and they aren't, are they? and she can remove them but just, please, she can't go back to prison.

but then Agent Hotchner just goes "hey, hey, Penelope. it's fine. I understand. this is your office, and you have the right to decorate it. I'm not going to fire you over.... My Little Ponies? and uh, some unicorns?" and Penelope can't help but laugh because he genuinely looks baffled by her collection on her desk, and did he just call her Penelope?

and after that, once, after a bad case that Aaron knew affected Penelope (it involved murdered parents & their only child left orphaned and it just hit too close to home for Penelope), he stopped by a local toy shop and bought the brightest, most sparkly, most colourful thing he could find in there (it ended up being a small figurine of a princess on a small, detachable throne that could light up and play some really funky pop music. Aaron cringed internally as he brought it over to the counter, and awkwardly nodded as the cashier asked, "buying this for your daughter, sir? she's going to love it, it's the latest in a collectable series" and he pretended to not see the questioning eyebrow that Derek gave him after seeing the package) and when he presented it to Penelope when they got back, he got the biggest and most bone crushing hug ever from Penelope because "aw that's so sweet, thank you! and you got me the latest in the collection! it's limited edition!" and it just ended up becoming a tradition — Penelope always looks forward to the end of a case now, not only because that means her people are coming home, safe, in one piece (sometimes debatable but still, they're coming home, to her) but it also means that Hotch has brought her yet another tiny figurine or souvenir to add to her collection and she can't wait to see what it is, and Hotch always, always, finds the time after they've wrapped up the case, before the jet leaves, to pop by a local toy shop to get both Penelope and later, when he's older, Jack some toys or souvenir from wherever state he's in, because he wants both of them to know, that despite all the bad out there, there is still good in the world, and they should never forget that

OKAY this ask is SUPER LONG already i apologise skfjsk i have ideas for JJ & Emily but idk if you'd even wanna continue reading them... (maybe.... give me a sign and I'll send another ask and write it? 🥴)

anyways this was just something that came up and i had to write it out 🥺 sorry for spamming you, i hope you're having a great day/night ahead.

- 🌙

Hi so I'm putting everything below the cut for scrolling purposes x

He is!!

Oh my god, I love that scene. It came up in a TikTok about ships, because Person A and Person B are both very smart when they're alone, but put them together and it cancels out, and it made me laugh.

I also love Dad Hotch. Like I love him as much as I love "fighting to keep his emotions in check because he needs to be a leader, but you can tell from the slight change in tone, or the slight glaze of his eyes that he's seconds away from crying" Hotch. Which is saying something.

DON'T APOLOGISE FOR LONG ASKS!! That's what the keep reading on posts is for :))

Oh I love how much Hotch cares about Reid, and of course Reid uses it to his advantage to get Hotch to do the same, because they're similar in that way. Also, he would definitely start grinning when Hotch looks down at his empty plate like: oh. Platonic Hotchreid is everything to me, because it's these two people that have been caretakers their entire life trying to look after another person that wouldn't let anyone do that and it's just... the HOTCH ANGST POTENTIAL THAT IS SO UNTAPPED!!!

Also, not a criticism of you, but from what I've heard from people is that functioning labels are harmful and shouldn't be used because it misrepresents the situation!

I love that idea though!! And Derek being protective over them so he's just like: no, you won't interrupt them, and I will take control of the situation for a few hours AAH!!

OH I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT MORGAN AND HOTCH BONDING!! It's so perfect!! I love the idea of Morgan teaching Hotch to do things, and Hotch realising how relaxing he finds it to do these things.

And because we can't have nice things: he refuses to go after Foyet breaks into his apartment because he doesn't deserve peace, but then Morgan just uses his key, drags him out, takes him to a house and presses a brush into his hand because he's not going to let his friend self destruct like this.

EVERYTHING ABOUT GARCIA!! OH MY GOD!! I need to get some work done, so I'm going to finish up there, but seriously!! Amazing!! I love the idea of Hotch getting her little figurines and stuff <33

(shameless self promo, she does the same for him in "and he will come back home" hehe)

I would love to hear the Emily and JJ ones!! I hope that's the sign you need :)

Don't apologise for spamming I was having a dull day, and I hope you have a good day too!

#🌙anon #people talk to me #tw food #tw eating habits

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arethereanyoriginalusernames · 4 years

Text

Fanfiction review : Unexpected

Disclaimer: Do not send hate to anyone mentioned in this post. If you plan to respond in anyway to this post, I ask that you remain civil to everyone. Also, this review is an opinion post. Do not take what I say here as fact. Thank you.

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I like sorbet. I do! I prefer it to ice cream, and I would gladly eat half a tub without hesitation. But if I were to eat it every day? I'd get sick of it. It's always bothersome when something like that happens. Especially in literature. Sometimes, a short story is more enjoyable than a lengthy saga. Good things can come in small packages....

... what was I talking about again? Ah, whatever.

Anyway, let's talk about zoophobia fanfiction.

*****

Those who have had the misfortune of reading my last fic review may recall that I went through each and every chapter of TDL's story. This time, however, this will be structured in a sort of ramble. I will be discussing things in sections, and I will give my overall thoughts at the end. This is a review of "Unexpected " by a "Kalum16" , who, if my memory serves me correctly, goes by @kartoonluv on Tumblr. Now, this review was not requested by anyone, so if Kalum (who I'll refer to as KL for brevity's sake) wishes this review to be deleted, I will comply with his wishes. Also, I suggest that you read this on fanfiction.net before continuing with this post.

******

Something I would like to get out of the way are my views on romance and the story's pairing. I'd like to bring these up now as I will be mentioning them later on.

Firstly, I have never been in a romantic relationship. However, I have been in love before, and I know people who are or who have been in relationships. That being said, I have considered that perhaps my lack of experience will mean that with certain things... I might not get it. The importance of certain events may be lost on me, and I may not be able to connect with things couples do.

I would also like to confess that Kayla x Damian is one of my least favorite ZP ships. The idea that after Damian basically harasses Kayla, manipulates her and Zill, and basically makes their lives miserable for his own gain, that he can be rewarded by getting the girl? Not exactly something I jive with. Also, (and this is my interpretation) I do not think that Damian's feelings towards Kayla are genuine. By that, I think (due to how little they know about each other) Dame is more in love with his idea of who Kayla is. Or, if we weren't going to look to deep into it and say that it's because he has a thing for Christians, it would make Dame's attraction pretty materialistic. Neither idea really screams "good ship!" to me.

********

That being said, let's discuss how the pairing is handled here. I'm actually on board with this depiction of the relationship. For one thing, it seems that Kay and Dame have become friends. They clearly care about one another before starting a relationship, and the story makes it so that they can relate to each other. This takes away my issue of these characters not acting knowing each other well, and thus the feelings they have towards one another come off as genuine.

I think that the story makes them out to the a cute couple. However, I still have a major issue with it, and the story as a whole.

Basically, (after a while) I think it's boring.

To best explain why, I would first like detour and discuss Damian and Kayla individually.

*******

Ladies first. I have mentioned in previous posts that I enjoyed the first chapter of this story. Back then, I had not read beyond chapter 1, as I hadn't realized that the story had been updated. And you know what? I still stand by that. In chapter 1, Kayla feels a lot more interesting than she is in the comic. It's interesting to see Kay in a situation where she basically gets what she wants, but she ends up hating it. She struggles with writers block, self doubt and regret. It's sad to see how apathetic she's become, and how she no longer holds the ambition she once did.

I also liked that she still had some internalized prejudice against demons. It made sense, and it made what was going on more interesting as it created inner conflict. Now, if the story was just the one chapter, I would have bought that her falling in love with Dame would have made all her prejudice go away. I mean, you would need to wrap it up by the end.

But we got more than 1 chapter, and thus the evaporated prejudice feels kind of contrived and like lost potential. Hell, it would have been interesting if an ongoing subplot involved Kayla conquering her prejudice by learning about demons and debunking the stories that I heard as a kid. Her just yeeting away her prejudice because she falls for one guy feels kind of lame, and going forward, Kayla feels less interesting in the fic.

Originally, she had all this regret and self doubt. While it's great to see her doing good, her issues feel like they've almost all been resolved by a makeout session. Throughout the story, Kay doesn't grow or develop in any way. Her only real issue is "I'm in love with Dame and ppl don't like it, woe is me"

There's this chapter where Dame meets Kay's parents, and I feel like I should be invested, but I'm more confused than anything. The story points out that Kay's parents were ok with Zill (who's part demon, part whatever the fuck), but they're not ok with Dame. I mean, yes, he's the antichrist, but have they not figured out that their daughter is into some weird dudes? Like, they're perspective is painted as "oh, Kay was such a good girl, and yadda yadda", but, again, they were ok with Zill. You'd think that that relationship would at least make them question that idea? Also, why are Kay's parents deer? Am I missing something?

Kay serves really only one role here. She's Dame's gf, she'll defend the relationship to the grave, and she cares about him. She doesn't become much more than that, and every chapter feels like it's redundant in reinforcing that idea. Like...ok, we get it, let's move on.

*******

Does Damian do much here? Not really. He's mainly the inverse of Kayla for the most part, being "I will defend this love, no matter fucking what". The issue being constantly brought up about how he's the antichrist, so "oh no, that makes things difficult ", is always resolved in about a chapter.

The story feels like it's trying to give Damian some development. I mean, I guess he stands up for himself against Kay's parents, and defends her from his? Oh, and there's that moment where he's like "Yo, I have no control over my life, I don't wanna be a prince, you make me happy ", etc. But not even this really does anything. The meeting with his parents feels like a repeat of meeting Kay's parents. We even get the one parent approval, one on one talk, and it's the mom, just like before. Oh, and Dame's emotional "I will reject prince-y ness to be with you " speech? All that leads to is them having sex.

Ok, well, that last one I might give a pass. I don't find sex to be that big a deal, but I know some people view it as this super important thing, so maybe through that lense, I could see sex as being an emotional payoff.

*******

One thing I won't give a pass is chapter 2, which really didn't need to be here. Jack never shows up again, Kayla can be subtracted from this chapter entirely, and the only build up to this was a couple lines in the previous chapter. The chapter itself is alright, but it feels like it should have been it's own separate story. My only idea as to why this chapter should stay is that, apart from Kayla in chapter 1, this is the only chapter with development. Damian owning up for being a shit is great, and it shows some of only god damn growth for anyone here.

Another chapter that didn't need to be here was whichever was the chapter when Zill showed up again. Admittedly, I skipped this chapter almost entirely. Look, he and Kay broke up, and they're dating different people. That's it. That's all we need. I read the first few paragraphs and the last few. I feel like I don't need to read the entire chapter to know that it's just reinforcing the idea of how great a couple Kayla and Damian are. You know, like basically every chapter in here.

*****

My biggest issue overall with this story is the relationship. As much as I've been ragging on this fic, KL is very gifted at writing. There were some instances where a reread or two could fix some wonky sentences (sounds like me reviewing my posts), but overall he does have a good grasp on it.

That being said, the relationship, the core of this story, is not interesting enough to warrant all six chapters. The only issue Kayla and Damian face are the opinions of others. They never have any reason to question the relationship, question themselves as people, or think about how to handle things. It would have been a lot more interesting if we saw them develop the close relationship the story portrays them as having. It would be interesting if we saw them learn more about each other, or discover ways to deal with each other if one of them is being a dumb bitch. We get it. They love and care about each other. The world around them think it's weird. Every chapter just reinforces the same idea again and again.

I think KL could easily make this better. There's a bunch of plot points that are never brought up more than once that could be interesting. For instance, Kayla struggling to write new songs. We could see more of how she and Dame deal with that instead of having them mention "oh yeah, the problem is fixed now ". Does Damian ever earn Jack's forgiveness? Does Kayla learn anything new about demons?

KL, I believe you when you say these two care a lot about each other. And yeah, seeing how they make their relationship work in spite of what others think is an interesting idea on paper. But the characters don't become closer to each other or anything. Why would I be concerned about the issues presented in the story when I know that they're just going to be resolved in the same way?

You know it's kind of like sorbet...

I would still nonetheless recommend this story tho. Again, as much as I've ragged on it, I still think that the story is good. As mentioned before, I don't have much experience with romantic relationships, so perhaps something here could be lost on me. I'm curious to know anyone else's thoughts.

I apologize for wasting your time

- Spooky S Skeletons

Ps. Yes, quarantine is messing with my head :) just bear with me

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