#but cant kill Racism.

[blueiight]

You're so right. the sex industry is lucrative and fast money. Since the Du Lacs were months from bankruptcy an honest business was not going to cut it. He even says that his little corner grocery stores weren't making enough. And I'll bet getting that kind of big money that fast while also being the token/pet black was addictive.

he needed to get rich fast cuz his family was also unaware of how close to bankruptcy they were. i wouldnt say he liked being the token black person more than he liked the power n psychosexual performance of controlling what these rich white men have sexual access to. “the product was desire” his modern self says. and he was the plug. re: his fixation on acquiring the fairplay salloon in ep1-2 is motivated by that & etc etc etc. ep1 when lestat is like “u made me buy a townhouse in the quarter” louis is like “i know men of my race look the same to u ppl but i aint sell u no house” & as soon as he becomes a vampire in ep2 he kills the assessor (?) for calling him a “good negro”. lestat is a french white man he knows little about here other than this guy has more things than me & hes feeling up on lily while staring at me. i wanna be him , kill him, and REDACTED by him. it unnerved him bc lestat was likening him to lily in that moment of sexual tension. translating lestat’s sentence, snarking at him off the jump, then being mesmerized by him not to put my ship goggles on [for a canon ship ik lol] is a rly gr8 way to set up the lxl dynamic n how louis operates. show louis is someone with sum i deem interpersonal racial pride. he interacts with his particular black classed community of his era n shows a perfectly respectable face in the eyes of the black church, his baby sister w the tickets up the garvey line, but everybody know where that money come from& r perfectly fine eating off its benefits. louis strategizing to get ahead at the expense of the black ‘collective’ outside of his immediate network. claudia would be someone outside of that as a poor black girl. shes the type of girl louis couldve .. well. lets just say, the fact that louis saved claudia in the midst of the race riot n losing his family , their shared tie of being made immortal by lestat & decades of living with lestat brought this temporary show of solidarity in the murder plot btwn lou+clauds that otherwise may have not have been there had claudia & louis met in a diff situation n show potential to go a lot of places in parts of s2 when lestat is out the picture. anyways. louis is not a self loathing black man n he hates being the token, but he was hardly a paragon of racial solidarity in s1. n he was always aware that his privileges were extremely conditional & dependent on how much of himself he was able to comparmentalize in situations where he did not have the upper hand and had to put aside his pride. what better to set up a certain kind of person whod favor eternal life, than a suicidal bougie boule opportunist of a black gay man whos aspects of himself all existed on different bookshelves.. who had to lie about his family’s financial condition to them, who tries to maintain this double life even with newly bestowed immortality. hes not grovelling at tom or fenwick’s feet, he plays the game to stay afloat but despises having to smile in their face. thats why when hes a vampire & the laws r discriminating against him hes so much more transparent in showing how he feels about them. all that pentup aggression he felt as the only black man in those rooms is the fuel for why he gored fenwick& ripped up toms jaw. i think 1x01 louis was actually at a breaking point but 1x02-beginning of 1x03 b4 the vampire starvation shit louis was rly feeling himself when the dough was rolling in. he has the fairplay salloon, he has lestat, he can ‘control’ what white people have sexual access to. but all that crumbles…

#yn. #yn answers #iwtv #louis de pointe du lac #Hes not a buy back the block type nigga hes the ‘i can fuck & kill a honkey out ws’ type guy. jacob anderson saying lou can kill a racist #but cant kill Racism.

[starwikia]

suicide cw

look i have been in this area before mentally. it sucks and i wouldn’t wish this on anyone. but, and this is going to sound callous, but i don’t feel any sympathy for james somerton. even if i hope he’s like. not dead. But thats all the amount of goodwill im willing to give him. The more i think about this really, the more angry i am. 

ngl this entire situation is another example of how white people weaponize their mental illness to avoid consequences. Im seeing it in real time.

this man has a continuous habit of using self-harm as a get-out-of-jail-for-free card. in both of his apologies, he has worded his supposed attempts in ways that were clearly meant to guilt people who displayed his plagiarism and overall horrendous history of racism and misogyny. i say supposed because, while i’m not saying those are lies and this would he such a fucked up thing to lie about that i don’t want to think he has, unfortunately, it’s been proven again and again that his word can’t be trusted, as he’s known to lie to try get out of consequences. Hes a proven liar. him lying about this is actually the best case scenario, because no one should go through this entire situation, wouldnt wish this on anyone, but you can only do this so often before people stop sympathizing with you. is this callous? Yeah, but like. I’m actually fucking angry he cant straight up take no as an answer. that this is how he reacts realizing he cant be one of the Cool Kidz™️ on youtube anymore. he acts like he DESERVES a career, like its not a privilege hes lost due to his own actions.

He lied about apologizing and forgiving people, he lied about giving the money to hbomberguy to give to ppl he ripped off (yknow, instead of doing it himself), he lied about the jessie gender situation and rewrote the narrative to make it so he isnt the bad guy, and hes the victim all along actually!

you can’t tell me that supposed last message of his isn’t meant to be a 13 reasons why esq attempt to deflect the blame “look i’m going to kill myself and it’s all YOUR PEOPLES FAULT for not letting me achieve my DREAM of being filmmaker IN PEACE!!! I just wanted Nick’s (the guy who I have thrown under the bus again and again) portfolio up!! Im just being a good friend dont you all FEEL BAD” he refuses to take ANY ACCOUNTABILITY of any of his actions and he IS STILL trying to shove the blame over to other people again.

it’s also pretty ironic people are like “uhhh well hbomber’s fans harassed him!!!” like hbomber outright told people NOT to HARASS JAMES!!! ALSO acting as if james doesn’t have a very real documented history of STRAIGHT UP sending his fans to harass and threaten smaller creators, more notably women, trans, and bipoc creators. especially after he’s stolen typically very personal anecdotes so he could profit from them. so why can he do it but the second people are like “hey this guys an actual piece of shit.” and he can’t handle it suddenly people are trying to white knight his shit? like no he doesn’t get that. he doesn’t get that at all just because he couldn’t handle the consequences of his actions. 

what? were supposed to stay quiet about a man profiting off of other minorities because he wanted to be the spokesman for all gay people? people tried to solve this on a smaller, more private scales for YEARS and he kept doing it. it was clear that the giant public video was the ONLY way to get people to notice. HE WOULDVE GOTTEN AWAY WITH STEALING 87 FUCKING THOUSANDS WORTH OF DOLLARS. HE CANT HANDLE THE FACT HE CANT GET AWAY WITH IT. 

am i supposed to feel bad for the guy who basically threatened a trans woman with the police? i don’t care what anyone says, it’s so fucking obvious that he threatened jessie by implying he was getting the police involved in their conflict. what am i supposed to act like that didn’t happen? are we supposed to pretend like he didn’t glorify nazi’s and outright said that gay people made up a good chunk of the nazis? That he didnt say america joined ww2 bc they were jealous of the NAZIS. WHAT WOULD POSSESS YOU TO FUCKING SAY THAT. but then? He gives women (not even women most of the time, he misgenders nonbinary ppl constantly) shit for writing mlm. are we supposed to act like he doesn’t straight-up sees himself superior and better than people of color and steals their works to put himself on a pedestal? Are we supposed to act like he didnt spit on our elders by saying “only the boring gays survived aids” like man! Fuck you! He BLANTANTLY MAKES UP HISTORY TO PUT HIMSELF ON A PEDESTAL!! HE ACTIVELY TRIED TO REWRITE LGBT HISTORY TO SUIT HIS FUCKED UP NARRATIVES!

yes this sucks ! no one deserves this but no one should be making him a martyr. Thats what he fucking WANTS! He wants to be immortalized as a victim!! (again, supposedly, it was reported hes alive but its not confirmed).

The shit he got isnt near the amount of fucking callous behavior hes done again and again. Again, to drill this point, EVEN IF HE DIDNT CALL THE POLICE HE THREATENED A TRANS WOMAN INTO THINKING HE DID!!! The fact he tried to use a head injury to justify years of the outright ghoulish shit fucking astounds me. Why the fuck did anyone in his life thought it was a good idea to let him TRY to come back. in the end, he had options. he didn’t need to try to make a comeback. HE DIDNT NEED TO FUCKING LIE OR IGNORE THE SHIT HE WAS CALLED OUT ON the reality is, he wanted to come back thinking he could shove it under the rug, was told that no dude, you’re not allowed to be a youtuber anymore. you’re done. you need to move on and went full nuclear. it’s not on anyone’s hands but his own. HES BEEN DOING THIS TO HIMSELF!! But nah man we cant call his shit out bc hell may or may not kill himself. Fuck the other minorities who have the same issues but worse and sometimes BECAUSE of him. This is going to SUCKKKK so bad when other ppl, specifically white gays, are going to weaponize this shit to get away with their stuff.

#warning: do not read this post if you want me to be nice to james somerton. i am extremely mean in this post. #before anyone accuses me of shit i legit never contacted him myself or anyone involved. i am someone who witnessed this behavior repeatedly #again. i hope hes alive and well. the fact is him lying about this WOULD BE THE IDEAL SITUATION. BC NO ONE SHOULD GO THROUGH THAT. but. #he HAS to forever be the victim in his eyes. attempting doesnt automatically mean youre free of sin. #its just terrible to see that regardless whether or not he did do it #its very clear his attempts to run away from his consequences are working on some people #we need to acknowledge that if your shitty ex friend can weaponize a threat to kill themselves #so can this internet person after being called out for horrendous shit #like what was the alterative? what were people supposed to fucking do? be nice about it? #yeah as if poc and trans women arent historically given shit for being 'too mean' about wanting justice. #this isnt just the plagiarism this is the fact a white dude has been parading himself as THE speaker for the gays(tm) but has been using hi #gayness to shield himself from his misogyny racism transphobia and antisemitism #its very clear regardless this means that ppl r going to side with him and then give him benefit of doubt #if you cant handle the heat stay out of the fucking kitchen dude. this is the consequences of your fucking actions. #hes a disgusting person who cant handle being told no so hes going to drag everyone down with him #like. idk this entire situation is frustrating to me. #its also frustrating ppl trying to be moral abt it like 'see! i knew this was bad all along!' no you didnt. shut it. #for the record im like mainly talking abt twit watching those spineless uwu cutesy ppl basically saying hes done noting wrong #oh and also alt righters who are clearly weaponinizing this where u know they wouldnt give a shit if a right ytber did this. #james somerton #idk might delete this later its just. ugh...

[numberonepartyboy]

congrats to toshiro for being the first male victim of fandom misogyny

#i just saw someone tell that they hate him bc he is in the way of f_rcille. goodbye im killing myself #LIKE.....HOW COULD YOU NOT SEE ANY PROBLEM WITH THATTT #ARE YOU STUPIDDD #IDGAF THAT YOU LIKE YOUR WHITE SHIP DONT FUCKING GO BE RACIST TO HIM WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU #but errmmm its okay bc he a MAN!!!! and a CREEP and a mysoginyst!!! he manic pixie dream girl'd falin!!!! <- SARCASM #can you pls not hate on my autistic asian guy. bc of white ppl #dunmeshi #fandom racism #also if you hate him AT LEAST USE HIS NAME. HIS REAL NAME!!! TOSHIRO!!! GOOODDDDDD #'he owned slaves' THATS HIS DAD. HIS FATHER. AN AUTHORITATIVE FIGURE. HE CANT SPEAK UP ITS A NUANCE BC YOU CANNOT SPEAK BACK TO YUR PARENTT #and also the fact that hes the eldest so i sympathize with him sm. as an eldest sibling #jesus christ. im so tired of this fandom i dont think i can ever fucking interact with it. i hate this. #im reusing this joke fuck you #rant #dungeon meshi #toshiro nakamoto

[nashvillethotchicken]

A subtle way you can tell lestat is very selfish and ignorant about race, especially in ep 6 is that he said that they'd go to Argentina, a country which at the time was explicitly looking for white Europeans (including n*zis) to move there after spending decades pushing their black and Indigenous populations to the fringes of society to whiten up the country

#amc iwtv #iwtv #interview with the vampire #lestat de lioncourt #like i dont think hes doing it on purpose #i think he saw somewhere that takes Europeans and he sees claudia and louis as extensions of himself so if he'll be welcomed they'll be too #like i genuinely dont think he thought of moving somewhere that wasnt as segregated for the sake of louis or claudia #and to give the barest of credit. there wereny many places they could both go #lestat isnt allowed in europe cus of armand and them and louis and claudia cant move unencumbered through most of the us bc of segregation #like the only place they could go in the us at the time as an interracial family is ohio (only state with intteraccial marriage in 1940) #and they couldnt even be out there #so i understand leaving the country but picking a place that is already pushing its black population further into the fringes #is just another way to control the movements of louis and claudia. even if lestat doesnt realise or have that intent #like if they decide to leave him when theyre in Argentina theyre literally boned. especially in the 40s when all the n*zis are coming #and tou can see this in other parts of their relationship. like lestat is ok taking louis' to operas where louis has to be a valet to get in #he says that their money had protected them from legal backlash for being gay but not really for louis being black #lestat not getting the multiple microagressions from the lawyer #hell lestat even says “if he had offended you i would have killed him”. implying he doesn't believe that louis had a right to be offended #like lestat is ignorant to race especially in the american context and especially especially in other countries #hes white and french. they invented racism like there is a non 0 chance he saw saarah baartman displayed in a traveling circus in france #like i dont think he is outwardly racist like the alderman or tom but hes ignorant as hell. #he probably didnt see his first black person until he was 25

[starlooove]

Always will fill me with rage when white Ppl make hcs or fics about their white faves saving Duke cass or Damian from racism (or cass saving herself with a punch and no genuine emotion about it bc she’s a Girlboss 😝 😆) and then they demonize Damian 24/7 only say ‘Duke is on day shift’ in their fics or literally have cass as some walking talking fighting doll that teases her brothers sometimes. Like it’s genuinely y’all don’t think it’s racism unless it’s a slur. Can’t tell me what internal or implicit bias or even what a microagression is and u wanna talk on racism.

#shame on the black folk eating it the fuck up too #actually this is why kills me about white ppl in fandom #like we know black Ppl cant escape internal racism so what makes YALL think ur cracker asses dodged the racism beam #and that none of ur thoughts or opinions on these characters are impacted by race at all simply bc u don’t say ‘bc they’re X race’ at the #end of every sentence? #like i could draw a connection between this inability to think critically about how ur own racial bias fucks everyone around u over #and how the only flaws y’all project onto ur faves is communicating badly or being too nice without a care for how the shit they do #might impact anything #i Might later actually #i promise it makes sense mutuals let me cook 🙏🏾 #there is a line between the only flaws for Tim jason and dick being ‘bad at feelings :(‘ to them and their own inability to face #accountability or acknowledge the heinous shit they’ve done irl #the they in the last part of the sentence being yt folk yall get it

[cherry-shipping]

ok so anyway while were on the topic of fanfiction it pisses me off to no fucking end when fanfic authors depict papyrus as some naive gullible sweet innocent little kid who doesnt know or understand anything, ESPECIALLY if its a fic dealing with monster racism and xenophobia. ive seen so many fucking fanfics talking about that where papyrus is written as some sort of innocent ball of sunshine who cant understand the harsh reality he lives in....... like shut the FUCK UP!!!!! he KNOWS!!! the thing is hes SMART and KIND and WILL NOT LET YOU BE MEAN TO HIM!!!!!! thats why he reacts positively even if you pick the mean dialogue options in the game!!! he KNOWS youre trying to hurt his feelings but he wants to be your friend SO BAD he LITERALLY will not let you!!!!! and it works!!!!!! hes not stupid!!!!! you guys are just ableist!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#cherry chats #IT MAKES ME SO FUCKING MAD............... 'hes just a sweet precious cinnamon roll uwu' SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!!!!!!!!! #hes not a child. hes not stupid. hes arguably more observant than sans. but unlike sans hes not overwhelmingly cynical #he believes in people and he believes in kindness and he STICKS TO THAT!!!!!!!!! #fics writing about monster racism where any character is like 'no... we cant tell our wee babe papyrus about that‚ he cant understand' #make me wanna kill someone for real #people who infantalize papyrus are my mortal fucking enemies i swear to god. i swear to fucking god #like if frisk‚ an ACTUAL child‚ can somehow be mature enough to be the monster ambassador #then i guarantee papyrus‚ an adult‚ can grasp the concept of racism #sometimes......... its painfully obvious when someone doesnt think autistic people can be competent functioning adults. huh. #kills you with one thousand god damn laserbeams

[king-sassy08]

Bro. Does anyone else feel hopeless

#like. #Palestine #capitalism #system racism #its all eating me alive. im doing what i can but. its not enough im just one man. #all i can do is be kind and help the people i can. #i know its enough for one person to do. to make a man a sandwich or give a friend a ride. #to give the person at the window a tip and hold the door open for others. #but its like. im so hopeless its not enough. the world is getting worse akd worse. #i feel like im living in one of those dystopian movie opening montages #war genocide famine natural disaster disease global warming #its KILLING me. #and on top of all that i have genetic depression its not just environmental #and im like. just shut up and be happy #but i cant be and im alone and just. depressed #idk. #jay rants #jay rambles #jay jabbers #i know this isnt just me feeling this way but i still feel isolated nd i blame capitalism & our government and i think we should [redacted]

[comradecowplant]

I don't follow blogs ran by people being racist about rap so I'm only witnessing the secondhand responses to the recent "discourse" and sadly 'tumblrinas being racist about their bad taste in music & low lyrical literacy' is exactly what I'd put on my 2024 bingo card for this steadily declining shithole....

#between the institutional transphobia and smol bean zionist problem the only thing missing is some classic 1990s* racism #my understanding is that people are reenacting their favorite law & order episodes and fearmongering about vIoLenCe in rap again? #1) violence is often good/necessary. grow up!!! #2) the poppunk groups yall obsess over sing about (& commit!) statutory rape every other song so actually shut the everloving fuck up #3) genuinely: how do you function in the world when you cannot distinguish lyrical creativity & dramatization from real life? #*more like 1970s to now racism obvs bc antiblack losers have always been not normal about rap but im thinking of a specific 90s/early 2000s #obscenity case. i cant remember who it was (& searching for rapper arrested for lyrics uh isnt giving fruitful results to say the least) #but anyway i am so sorry to those encountering these racist freaks in the wild. rest awhile in my glade so you may restore your energy #lately ive just really been into socialist/resistance music so if you need a break we can discourse about which dprk music group is the bes #ponchobo electric ensemble might be my favorite but really it's a trick question bc they are all amazing #here take this with you before you go. may it give you strength *hands you KPASM Chorus song about killing racist american imperial dogs* #a kendrick x kpsmc remix could have a lot of potential but thats for people who are better at remixing than i to ponder

[ayphyx]

My anger is not my own

My death is not my own

I have nothing that cant be taken away from me

#i hate how i cant vent out my frustrations with racism without the fear of being mocked by white people #if i am killed cis people will find ways to make me into a monster #i hate this shit man #damn #queer mentally ill *and* poc? pick a struggle dude

[mainfaggot]

omg so many thoughts on paradox killer

#last 10 mins of ep 8 rn #i dont exactly approve of lee tangs actions but in the end I've found myself rooting for him #he was pathetic to begin with and pathetic in the end but i think he grew in his own way #it's obvious by the second murder that he killed for the sake of avoiding jail time but. #its also mad convenient that he goes around killing awful people on instinct #but then again. the show constantly alludes to Dostoevskys crime and punishment and we all know how that goes #BUT THEN AGAIN. the justice system is broken who gaf #lee tang clearly has supernatural instincts or some shit so like. lets goooo divine retribution #see if this was real life i actually wouldn't mind if someone like him existed. #but the main condition being: the supernatural instinct has a 100% accuracy rate #otherwise it's so morally questionable #so i guess as far as the show is concerned. in fiction i think it's a highly unrealistic but stilk fascinating concept #idk i cant exactly stand by the 'all murder is bad' but i am also fully aware that in the real world. where people are easily swayed and #influenced by money power etc murder is not carried out when necessary #and when unnecessary it is carried out due to violent racism misogyny etc #z.post

[wearevillaneve]

Sandra Oh is a LOSER and I have receipts.

Sandra Oh has been nominated 13 times for an Emmy Award and she has not won 13 times. Damn, gurl. What seems to be the problem here? You mean to tell me you weren't good enough not once, not twice, not thrice, not a dozen times, but THIRTEEN times?

Sorry, baby. It's all true. How do you spell "loser?" You spell it S-A-N-D-R-A-O-H. Okay, here's the thing. I'm only a few more weeks/days/hours/minutes/seconds from pulling the plug on WeAreVillaneve across every social media platform and since the show is dead, over, and buried, how much longer am I supposed to carry on? Gurl, please!

I'm all done with this "Yes, someone else was better than Sandra Oh for the 13th time, but oh well the writing wasn't that good and Zendaya was really good in Euphoria" bullshit.

Hey! Wasn't I supposed to be the star? WTF? Why are you smirking, Jodie, huh?

Sandra Oh has been nominated for an Emmy award 13 times and she has lost 13 times. Eleven times to a White woman and two times to a Black biracial woman and that is all well and good, but it is not. It really is not.

Sandra can style n' profile on the carpet and blow up social media by showing up rocking that Prince-inspired PURPLE in all her fierceness and ferocity, but when she actually steps inside, takes her seat, and sits quietly for the next three to four hours of jokes falling flat, commercial breaks, and categories she doesn't give a single shit about until they FINALLY get to Best Actress in A Drama and the actual award we tuned in to see, and once again loses because Someone Not Named Sandra Oh just oh-so happened to give a better performance than her it doesn't matter if their name is Claire Foy, Blythe Danner (x2), Katherine Heigel, Dianne Wiest, Jane Lynch, Zendaya (x2), Jodie Comer or Cherry "Who?" Jones.

All that matters is their name isn't Sandra Miju Oh. So yes, I AM blaming Sandra's 13th loss upon the fact that even White Liberal AF Hollywood is STILL located in Racist AF Amerikka and the fact is Sandra Oh is still too much of a badass, too unapologetic, too 50+, and too damn It's An Honor Just To Be Asian woman, and the Emmys ain't wit' it. Don't want to piss off those conservative corporations that buy up ad space on television and own movie studios or China by giving the Korean American Canadian her long-goddamn-overdue Emmy.

She can wait, right? Asian don't raisin, amirite?

Sandra Oh stood in the middle of the street in Pittsburgh after Asians had been targeted in Atlanta and across the U.S. and said I AM PROUD TO BE ASIAN AND I BELONG HERE and the Queen said it with her whole entire chest and damn whether or not White Liberal Hollywood was on board yet or not. Sandra spoke out when it would have been easier to not speak up.

Maybe that came back to bite her. Maybe it didn't. Maybe something else entirely, but I'm not going to treat Sandra being stubbed for the 13th and for all four seasons of Killing Eve as business-as-usual/somebody was better and ermigawd Zendaya is incredible!!!

Which she is. But is Zendaya and all the many other not-Sandras so much better than Sandra Oh? Sorry, but not sorry baby. Sandra Got Snubbed I give not one shit if Variety, The Hollywood Reporter, Deadline, Nikki Swift, the entire Killing Eve fandom in general, or you specifically agree with me or not.

Sandra Oh is Too Proud/Too Asian for Hollywood and that is fact and that is the truth. That's the truth and this 13th loss is the proof of it. I'm right and you're wrong and that's it. NOBODY loses thirteen damn times and it's just an unhappy coincidence. Don't be stupid or play me and Sandra like we are. We know what the Emmy wants and what it does not want to do is give Sandra Oh her Emmy.

So, roll up your excuses and do it any way you wanna but at the end of the day Sandra Oh was snubbed and I give not a single shit if Variety, The Hollywood Reporter, Deadline, Nikki Swift, and the entire Killing Eve fandom agree with me or not. Facts are facts, fam, and the facts are Sandra got screwed.

AGAIN.

Disagree all you want. I'm okay because reasonable people can disagree reasonably But then it's on you to show me where I'm wrong.

#killing eve #sandra oh #jodie comer #ke s4 #2022 emmys #she had no shot #doomed #it's not her fault #i blame sally woodward gentle #laura neal betrayed our trust #convince me i'm wrong #step up #challenge accepted #i dare you #prove me otherwise #u cant tell me otherwise #sandra oh is freaking amazing #it's an honor just to be asian #racism? #you can't handle the truth #fuck laura neal #into eternity and beyond #i hate her #she fucked up

[nagitoedit]

you don't have to read this is for screaming in the void

#trying to explain that i'm struggling without saying the big most important part of why i am struggling is . #like oh i'm struggling because uh . the issues. what are the issues? well . they are issues that i refuse to elaborate on #so it doesn't help anybody. but like how am i supposed to explain to my mom that the reason i've become so severely depressed is because #i'm suicidal. like oh btw ^-^ i hate the life you gave me and brought me into so bad that i want to die. but it's no big deal so don't worr #about it. #which like that wouldn't be how i meant it at all but of course that's also implied or something #which just makes me think of other things like that if things weren't so bad id be able to get help but help is inaccessible. #ughhhh i just hate this it's so agonizing. like cant things be a little less bad. i'm not having fun being like this and people are #reasonably irritated with me because only based on what i'm willing to tell just. isn't the full story at all and would obviously just. #not make sense because i'm leaving out major parts of what's happening and why. #and tbh i'm constantly going back and forth between like. coming out as suicidal. mainly because like. well. it kinda worrying me. #because for like months now i've almost daily been fighting off suicidal thoughts and often even having suicidal meltdowns #yesterday i was standing near a ceiling fan and was like hmm wouldnt it be nice if one of the blades came off and stabbed me through #the back of my skull and killed me. but then i thought no that would be too traumatizing for my family #as if me dying at all wouldn't be. which i also thought of. idk just thinking about the idea of #i want to live but not like this. because yeah. my mom said that she thinks reading bad news is why and it's like well . of course it is #but should i just stay completely unaware of what's happening in the world. but also bad news is just unavoidable #but yeah it is why i'm depressed. climate change racism homophobia transphobia covid wars economy etc like #these are things that i can't just. ignore? and am i seriously the crazy person for being upset about these things? #well she does think i'm crazy for still being scared of the dangerous virus that is currently the third leading cause of death in the us #like last night she was like ' it's good to be cautious but you're going over board' i'm friends with people who could die from covid. #'over board' i care about them and other people and i don't want them to die. i don't want to be permanently disabled by a virus with #a 20% chance every time i catch it to permanently damage my immune system and give me long covid. <- according to cdc #but whatever. i do genuinely want mental help. i think i need s different medication or a diagnosis bc uhmmm . i am unwell #but that's expensive. #i have an appointment with a doctor today for a med check because i don't think my ssri is working . obviously #as i am as you can tell absolutely overcome with severe and debilitating anxiety and depression. lolzors #whatever. except not because ouuuughhhgh <-unimaginable suffering #mypost

[starlooove]

The reason recent canon batfam sucks is because they have plotlines that could be fun but utilize fanon interpretation btw. “They can’t even write tim” the tim you like DOESNT exist and has NEVER existed. He started existing and it fucked up so many pre existing INTERESTING dynamics and potential situations that it got boring as fuck. Same with literally everyone else

#characters like Damian getting the same storyline over and over is racism #but fanon Is a lot more racist than canon and I’ll say it with my chest #at least canon gave Damian friends and growth at least once #y’all are still hemming and hawing over that fucking dinosaur tim doesn’t even care about anymore #whenever anything interesting or complicated happens it’s ooc and ‘don’t writers know we want happy family dynamics 😕’ #that anxiety thing Bruce did to Jason #sucks and all but far far more interesting than ANYTHING fanon has EVER come up with #canon is cool ideas done poorly and fanon is poor ideas done worse #and don’t get me wrong some fanon stuff is fun #like SUPER fun #but the idea that ‘fanon is better bc dc can’t write 🥺’ #I’m never gonna defend DC writers as a whole but YALL CANT EITHER #copy pasting found family templates onto characters admitting you haven’t and never will read a comic and turning around to shit on shit #you have NEVER read #some of y’all still think dick wanted tim in Arkham or that Jason never killed unless necessary #like fuck y’all are so irritating #if fanon wasn’t so racist and even worse BORING that poll wouldn’t be so egregious like fuck #like the racism is everywhere but batfandom has deluded itself into believing it’s unique when it’s kooky but quiet dad Bruce immortal #Alfred silly big bro dick who has quiiiite the temper gaurd dog Jason who made some mistakes but regrets everything coffee addict tim who’s #only flaw is insecurity and not caring for himself enough quiet dragon lady cass who can be sassy waffle loving sillay Steph murderous #borderline evil Damian who’s life’s goal is to destroy tim and nervous new Duke. #and don’t forget Barbara Is computer girlboss #like it’s just so. bland. maybe DC doesn’t listen to you bc ur fucking stupid s

[corneille-moisie]

white people shouldnt be allowed to make movies where cops brutally murders Black people

#you cant write this thinking its ok because if they were white it would be fine. no. #first of you cant write black people the same as white #but mostly : that completely and racistly ignores the fact that black people are kill by cops way WAY more than white people #police brutality #antiblackness #racism #i watched spiral yesterday and do yourself a favour : dont watch it :)

[magical-xirl-4]

So they basically confirmed Jeht was a lesbian in the new world quest but also we got paimon being fucking racist towards her and I’m actually mad. I’ve basically tolerated how paimon was written in Sumeru and still managed to like her at times, but now they’re legitimately making her comment on Jeht’s skin and I’m so fucking done

#jeht #genshin impact #not only that but a new character is being racist toward her too #i'm actually so mad #they're going to make a wonderful character like jeht. she's lovely and charming and smart and helpful and beautiful #her father dies before he even gets to open up to her completely #and they now have the audacity to make multiple characters be racist towards her #cant even begin to describe my shock and idk what to do now cause i am sick of hyv's racism #jeht i love you and you deserve S O much better #and you actually have to do this world quest btw and sit through the racism to open up new parts of the map #im going to kill them

[vaugarde]

oh also we watched the mlp g5 movie yesterday and i really liked it tbh ^^ it was very cute and vibrant and all the character designs were pleasing (in fact i really prefer looking at these characters in cgi), and izzy was my favorite, tbh i kinda just love every character kimiko glenn voices

#racism metaphor was very clunky and i cant really say too much on it but like i didnt have much hope that it wouldnt be clunky #so i just focused on the characters and yeah i think theyre all really good ^^ #but like. we talked abt this a lot but man i REALLY wish this wasnt in the g4 continuity #not just bc it doesnt make sense but bc conceptually it feels like such an insecure decision #like this world wasnt good enough to warrant being its own thing. it had to be a continuation #even tho the lore and such is clearly different from g4. like i feel like they wanted to make it standalone like the other series #but they panicked and thought ppl wouldnt care if twilight wasnt there. but i feel like all it does is hinder both series #bc no one wanted this to be where g4 ended up and it keeps g5 from doing its own thing bc it has to connect to g4 #like im not opposed to the wind creatures (not saying their name) not showing up bc they suck in the first place #but writing wise its weird to not even mention them at all when it was important to the worldbuilding #did the ponies just love being racist that much that they killed the wind creatures?? #if it was me and i HAD to make it the same continuity id probably have put this in the past instead of the future #but then we couldnt have ponies on phones ig #or epic g4 references #im gonna try out the show but im like hmmmm bc lex said the show was a lot worse abt this #i swear the movie itself was good and i liked it! but i can see easily see the lost potential #and how g4 is going to keep holding it back and refusing to let it be its own thing #echoed voice