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charliethecandyeater · 2 years

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I've been thinking about this a lot, but like. The mercenaries sexualities? Yay or nay? I did try to take their Canon personalities into account, but this is partially me rambling.

♥️⚾🎖️💣🔧🔥💪💉🏹🗡️💙

•Scout⚾:

apprehensive questioning, though he's not entirely opposed to the idea of being attracted to men. I mean, he grew up in a moderately Christian family, but his mother raised him right! There are different things about people, things that some folks don't figure out until later on in life. Hell, his mom was attracted to a few chicks. So the idea that Jeremy might be Bi and not know it isn't too strange of a concept. He was taught to respect people's differences, but he knows just how awful the world can be to someone if they were to come out as anything close to homosexual. So he's a bit apprehensive to find out yet. That being said he has caught himself eying down a rather nice looking dude from time to time.

•Soldier🎖️:

AMERICAN this man is AMERICAN!!! This man is in no way homophobic because he is AMERICAN!! And in case you didn't know, there's a little thing called FREEDOM in america! Soldier sees homophobia as a *very* un-American thing. As for what soldier is? Fuck it if anybody knows, let alone him. He just cares if you're someone who fights for freedom. Doesn't matter what's under the britches, so technically Pansexual? He doesn't care.

•Demoman💣:

Canonically he is straight. Definitely not homophobic. There's an in-game voice line where he says "If I weren't the man I was, I'd kiss you." He's very confident about himself and his sexuality, and he lives to build his fellow teammates up. Will not tolerate homophobia. He'll beat you up. He's very open minded and the cool uncle.

•Engineer🔧:

straighter than a ruler. Brought up a god-fearing Christian man, and he's very respectful. He's pretty sure he's figured himself out, after a questioning period in his younger years. He had to politely turn down a former band member when he started flirting with him, and bought a couple beers for him because he felt bad. Make no mistake, this Texan will beat the shit out of anyone stupid enough to be bigoted or homophobic within his line of sight. His Mama didn't raise a bitch, he will lay hands.

•Pyro🔥:

literally nothing is known about pyro. Well, besides the fact that their pyro vision really lets them see everything in rainbows. Pyro does not give a flying fuck! They just want to have fun! They want to have fun with their significant other, and it does not matter who the hell they are. Terry was straightforward like that, they wore their heart on their sleeve and they take everything at face value. That being said Terry does not understand homophobia in the slightest. Why are you being mean to that person? Just because he likes that other guy? Well that's stupid! That's not nice at all, and you should apologize! They might either be questioning or pansexual.

•Heavy💪:

*questioning* questioning. big man from Mother Russia. Big Man squash tiny enemies. Big man respect little man. Misha is many things, but he's not discriminatory in any way. Though he's definitely getting on in years, he has begun questioning some aspects about himself. It doesn't matter to him if he is gay or not, he only cares about providing for his family.

•Medic💉:

DID SOMEONE CALL FOR A BI DISASTER BECAUSE HERE THE FUCK YOU GO WHETHER YOU WANT IT OR NOT!!! Crazy man is crazy, this German man is beyond cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs. He's flamboyant, extreme, and does not give a flying rat's ass. That being said, he doesn't care if you know he's swinging both ways like a barefoot tap dancer elegantly crossing a room with broken glass scattered across the floor. He likes women, he likes men. That's all he knows, and it's pretty straightforward.

•Sniper🏹:

Babe he does not know much. Mick is a reserved person. He knows how to survive alone in the bush, because that's just how the Australian kiwi is. He's a loner. And that's completely fine. He used to being alone, so he really doesn't have much experience with people. That being said he knows how to pick up on certain social cues. he's not completely hopeless. Thing is, he hasn't really spent much time in a *relationship* relationship. As a professional sniper, his life is mostly him observing other people's relationships. Most times ending them. So he really hasn't spent much time thinking about himself. Is he gay? Is he asexual? He doesn't know, and he doesn't know if he wants to know. He's just focused on the job right now, no Scout, get the fuck away.

•Spy🗡️:

He's French.

Okok, that ain't an answer. He's about as straight as severe scoliosis. Old man. He knows himself, he knows who and what he likes. He knows when to hide it and he knows when it's safe to show it. He's been AROUND. Men, women, non-binaries, the unaffiliated, he's loved and lusted after them all. His language of love is very diverse. And honestly? In his younger years he was quite the wild one. (Think adrenaline junkie but it's polyamory romance.) Point is, Spy knows he is the fruitiest pastry in the confection basket known as "those nine jackasses that live in the fort off in the desert."

#tf2 #team fortress 2 #team fortress 2 head cannons #tf2 scout #tf2 soldier #tf2 demoman #tf2 engineer #tf2 pyro #tf2 heave #tf2 medic #tf2 sniper #tf2 spy #GAY #i guess #lgbtq+

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monstcrmade · 4 years

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I saw a thing that deeply upset me so you know what time it is! No, I won’t put this under a read more because it’s way too important even if it’s salty.

1.) I need people who are going to be writing Joe or fanfiction for Nicky and Joe to not treat Islam poorly. I need y’all to actually research and learn so you don’t go and write offensive shit when trying to portray a Muslim man. Stop trying to act like Joe is always questioning God, stop acting like Joe is questioning his traditions. Stop acting like Islam is lesser than Christianity. It is not. No religion is lesser than another and I’m a pagan with a strained relationship with Christianity saying this. Even if you write Joe as a not quite practicing Muslim, that’s fine, but stop treating Islam like dirt. And you don’t need to be questioning things to not practice much anymore.

2.) Another thing with Joe, don’t write him as being not as intelligent as Nicky. I don’t feel I should need to explain why doing so is so fucked up but apparently I have to. Writing non-white people as less intelligent than white people is extremely racist. No race is smarter or better than another. Writing one of the two main POC as less intelligent is hugely problematic. Also, nothing in the film indicates Joe is less intelligent. In fact, I’d say him and Nicky are on perfectly equal footing in the intelligence department. They are both quite intelligent men

3.) Stop assuming Nicky doesn’t know Arabic. Stop assuming Joe only ever uses Italian to talk to Nicky. Yes, we only see the Italian in the film but it’s canon that Nicky knows Arabic. There is no way they don’t talk to each other in Arabic in privacy (it’s safer to speak in Italian in public because y’know, rampant Islamophobia). Nicky would never have Joe learn his language and not learn Joe’s as well. If you honestly believe he would, that’s some colonizer ass mentality.

4.) I know a lot of people view Nicky as a submissive, timid uwu baby but he is simply NOT. Yes, Nicky is very kind-hearted, but that does not mean timid or submissive. Nicky might be kind but he’s also deadly. He is a sniper for fuck’s sake. The kind of cold, calculating mind you would need to adopt to be one is frightening. Joe himself is clearly amused when he says ‘he thinks you’re a mouse, Nicky’ because he knows Nicky is anything but. He has definitely seen people underestimate Nicky and then regret it. Just because he is the little spoon and ‘soft’ means nothing towards their dynamic. It doesn’t mean he’s not a top or a dom.

So - and this does not apply to all straight people before anyone tries to come at me - Straights™, stop trying to shove Nicky into this submissive box and make the assumption that Nicky is always the bottom (if anything, Nicky and Joe are more likely verse and Nicky is probably on top more often). I’m literally begging y’all to interact with actual gay people or get your references elsewhere than getting your gay dynamics from yaoi (which does not accurately represent gay relationships at all and is written as fetish material) or fanfiction inspired by yaoi. In a mlm or wlw relationship, one person is not the man and the other the woman. They are either both men or both women. Get your heads out of your asses and please understand this.

In conclusion, get out of my face with this homophobic, racist bullshit.

#;;tbd #;;the pagan speaks (ooc)#{//the uwu baby spiel is courtesy of my fiancee}

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angrypedestrian · 5 years

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THE TIME IDIOTS EPISODE 412 TITLED “Dan Didio’s Doomsday Clock” MY THOUGHTS:

I am EXHAUSTED and I have seen some GAY ASS gifsets

lets do this babyyyyyy

Once again, there is no way Ava lives in DC proper

she’s def in the burbs

prob Arlington if we’re being real

and i am

“ding dongs to doughnuts” def the turn of phrase to be used in this situation john

ray is very sweet, BUT ALSO can this show stop casually referencing a character’s alcoholism and then doing nothing about it?

it’s just cheap and i don’t like it!

either make them an actual alcoholic or just drop it cause i am tired

sara: there is literally...no on else who remotely can watch the ship. so, zari, i guess?

zari, not looking up from her phone: hmmm? you say something

sara:...fantastic

love a good sara and john team up!!!

nora is an excellent addition!!!!

john shut the fuck up you are not helping

HEY REMEMBER THAT HANK WAS GOING TO BUILD A THEME PARK FOR HIS ADULT SON

REMEMBER????

i love u gary u sweet precious moron

“MY DAD MADE A DEAL WITH A DEMON TO OPEN A THEME PARK”

YUP HE SURE DID NATE

but thank you for this very valid reaction

oh my god this guy on the phone

MIKEY T

THERE IS NOTHING THEY CAN’T HANDLE

that’s godDAMN RIGHT

my BOYS

my irl dragon bros!!!

Zach vs. Legends understanding of christian theology part 34899

hmmmm wonder how they handle purgatory

....not like that

and i know pretty much nothing about it, but even i know that is...wrong

Hahaha remember when the blood of christ was a major plot point?

yeah

ikea isn’t purgatory

it is hell and we all fuckin know THAT

ava’s assumption that she is dead is INCREDIBLY valid

oh mona NO, please do not bring your rpf to one of the people in the ship

BAD

Dan Didio has a doomsday clock in his office except it says “zari tomaz being canonically queer” and it is at 11:59

allegedly

Dan Didio’s sniper, trained on phil: sir, can i take the shot?

dan didio, through gritted teeth: technically......no

FUCK charlie and zari’s LOOKS at each other

the Neal Mcdonough Memorial Can Get It Award this week goes to that half second look between zari and charlie

fuCK

AND ALSO when the fuck did they have time to watch queer eye

zari calling them dummies i love her

john: why did we call them here again

nora: i...literally cannot remember

nora: this was a terrible idea

oh my god this dude is just doing a mikey from kimmy schmidt impression

i bet this guy can be canonically gay

Mikey T confirmed gay you’re welcome everyone

HOW IS THIS THE HINGE OF 4B

this is so FUCKING stupid

this is the stupidest thing i have ever seen in my entire life

dear LORD

i am zari’s desire for nothing but death

“you don’t even date humans” excuse me zari mick has SEVERAL human husbands

but i do enjoy that she just totally supports their furry selves

zari says furry rights

ava and gary need to go to couple’s therapy i think

legends: we just love a wacky christian theology subplot!

phil: okay, we can’t make zari or nate or ray canonically queer, what can we do this ep to really beef up the LGBTQ rep

phil: GOT IT we’ll have two women put together ikea furniture

where is phil’s glaad award??

des it’s 2019 now

and dc is too easy a target you’re not that special my dude

little on the nose with the handling our demons bit don’t we think?

nora and john arguing with each other is delicious

i mean, there very easily could be a beebo hanging around to fix this it does seem to be the writers go to deus ex machina at this point SO

it’s not, like, an unsafe assumption john

awwww they’re having real relationship discussions this is legit very sweet

(side note i love putting ikea furniture together hire me for all your furniture needs)

sara has only seen the lion, the witch, and the wardrobe movie

again, books are for nerds

she was real into tilda swinton in it tho

and no she has NOT unpacked that thank you very much

WHERE’s THE ESCAPE ROOM EPISODE

the people DEMAND IT

$250 for a mattress SARA do you want to sleep on a ROCK

ALSO you should be REGULARLY flipping your mattress twice a year anyways!!!!

I do like that they just got older actresses instead of old age makeup thank god

pffftttt as if ava would ever make sara give up her legends polycule

ava doesn’t really participate but she’s cool with sara doing it

it’s been a real rough week for nate

but also nathaniel you are a dumbass

HE WAS BUILDING A THEME PARK JUST LIKE YOU WANTED

HOW IS THIS A REAL LINE OF DIALOGUE

THEME PARK FOR ADULT SON

ACTUALLY SCRATCH THAT dan didio’s doomsday clock says “legends making any dc character canonically queer”

that FOREHEAD TOUCH

my gay little heart

oh shit loading a dishwasher is the ultimate test of a relationship

hint: i am the only one who ever does it right

mona is ultimate gen z

too powerful

damn girl, zari you are desperate if you will let mick help without much hesitation

you’ve read his stuff, he’s good, but not good sext good

it’s a different skill set!

sara not having an address to get mail at does not seem like a problem

this argument is so GOOD and perfect

recycling until we die tho is...an oddly specific fear

fuck courtney is so good

this show is resting on her goddamn shoulders

gary please do not say that

Tabitha is one of the less menacing names

it’s like saying, oh shit here comes Steve! ahhhhhhhh!

wow ray drinking? that’s love bitch

that spit take is fuckin gold

fuck that made me so happy

kudos to the intern that had to photoshop all those ava boxes

that was probably not a fun day

d’aw they love each other

gary is VERY excited to join the polycule

oh shit the smoke/cloud version of neron actually looks??? good???

actual good use of cgi?? on my legends?

BETTER THAN FUCKING CREEPY HOLE FACE

sara and charlie high fiving is my lifeblood

true chaos bisexuals THRIVING

sara and ava will not have any children they will have 10 dogs and an unspecified number of cats

it will be their reward for a lifetime of raising the legends

oh hey we found money in the budget for nate’s super power

zari has been binge watching brooklyn 99 with her cool coolcoolcoolcool cool

love u

those two are such lovable doofuses i’m really happy they’re being cute together

ooohhhhhh brandon is gonna get to be evil that is exciting

NEXT WEEK: Helen makes a surprise cameo! Or I guess lets hope it’s not Clytemnestra!!!!

#legends of tomorrow #legends of tomorrow spoilers #it is past my bedtime i don't even have jokes for the tags #anyways this ep was real real gay and dan didio is so MAD #the time idiots #my thoughts as i have them

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gaming-rabbot · 6 years

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Rabbot Reviews: Far Cry 5

Great taste, empty calories.

Far Cry 5 is the latest game in quite the lineage of a series known, as you might surmise, as Far Cry. Game number 6, actually, dependent on how canon you feel Primal was. FC as it stands now, though, is a bit of a… how to put it? A long call? A distant yell? An outlying wail? A remote shout? No, a far cry from the original two games, before Ubisoft bought the franchise.

(Yeah, that’s the phrase. Glad I thought of it, though I don’t know where I got it.)

((Incidentally, Remote Shout is the name of my new indie punk garage band. Album drops: never, because this is a joke.))

Starting after Far Cry 3, Ubisoft has been telling their dev teams to make lightning strike twice. Thus, each game hereafter has been an excited waiting game of seeing how they’ll try and ultimately fail to match the demented, yet incredibly charismatic villain that was Vaas.

And 5 feels like this illogical conclusion of just that. Because you have not one, not two, but four scenery-eating, rompy villains. Less a refined, precise attempt at the concept, and more of a blunderbuss approach; hoping to tickle a little of everyone’s villain fancy.

That, I feel, is the perfect metaphor for the game in general.

Last call to avoid spoilers.

Speaking of fitting descriptions of the entire game, let’s start with the intro. Because I have mixed feelings about it, at best. There’s a lot it does right, and some things it simply gets wrong, in regards to the rest of the narrative as a whole.

The pacing and atmosphere are phenomenal. The very air feels heavy around you as you enter into the church, here to take the titular Joseph Seed away from his flock. The pressure of the stakes are established flawlessly, leaving a feeling of palpitation, and a true understanding of just how dangerous Joseph is. Surprised as I was, the game even managed to shock me a little.

In that respect, it’s fantastic.

But then the game uses the cop crew you rolled in with as your motivation for the entire rest of the game, in the form of saving them from the Seed family, and oh god, it’s Fallout 4 all over again.

Just like the Bethesda example above, this aspect of the intro simply doesn’t work. And not just because it’s asking me to unconditionally care about cops.

This sequence of the narrative focuses on every other aspect of narrative setup except for the characters that you’re supposed to get invested in. You get but the most cursory taste of who they are as people. Such a small amount of time can mainly attach their personalities to a specific emotion.

Whitehorse is the calm voice of reason. Marshall Burke is frustrated. Pratt is nervous. And Hudson is… there too, I guess. Look, I’ll be honest, I had to look up half these people’s names for this review. Which I’m sure is only a good sign.

With so little to go on, I found I simply didn’t care whenever a cultist bigwig dangled one of them in front of me on a string, expecting me to bat like a good little kitten. Instead, I yawned and wandered off to play with the packaging the toy had come in.

Like a mischievous little kitten.

Which is such a shame, because there are so many other more interesting characters I actually did care about. And in the few scenes where the Seeds held them to ransom instead, the game suddenly had actual stakes.

Nick and Kim Rye were delightful every time they showed up. Virgil was so honestly sincere, I couldn’t help but like him; and his past, as it unfolded, was interesting to dive into. And Jerome was pretty much cool by default, and an excellent concept for a foil to the cultist bad guys, and everything they stood for.

But the story feels almost unconfident in its execution. Like the team is scared you’ll get bored. So the solution, write more story, or rather, several seemingly self-contained stories across the three separate regions.

With no overarching theme or plot threads besides “Joseph Seed probably gave the command for this at some point,” however, the connection feels loose at best. And this looseness makes the narrative feel all the weaker.

I’d much rather the story had been more focused and condensed. If they’d honed in on about one third as many characters, and if the villains felt a little less redundant, the overall narrative could’ve been much more refined and interesting.

Even the gameplay, while fun, has the same issue.

When traversing from place to place, you can’t drive for five minutes without a dozen random encounters passing you by, whether they travel by wheel or foot or paw. What should be a ten minute trek can sometimes take 30.

Again, it feels like the game is nervous. Like it’s worried that if I’m not firing a gun every two minutes, I’m losing interest. Look, I know this is the age of the internet, but my attention span hasn’t deteriorated that bad.

What were we talking about again?

But it’s sad though, as it detracts from what could be some very nice vistas and scenic routes. I can barely enjoy the quiet, introspective new addition of fishing without a randomly spawned cultist with an exaggerated country accent shouting “Fay-oond ‘eem!” and scaring away all the darn fish with a wild assault rifle volley.

Speaking of guns, let’s talk about politics. Something that could only ever be fun and only ever go over very well.

I don’t want to get too deep into this, as it’s been covered to death, and more eloquently than I’ll probably put it. For a better dive into the subject, I’d recommend watching Errant Signal’s “The Art of Saying Nothing.” To sum it up though, while at face value, FC5 might seem as though it’s about to lay down a scathing indictment of certain aspects of American culture, it really doesn’t.

Not for lack of bringing it up though.

The lady who owns Peaches the cougar, that is to say, the former owner of this sweet large kitten (no I’m not looking up the name this time; she’s not even a narrative footnote), is a prejudicial old woman who lives alone in the woods.

Immediately upon entering her domicile so I could acquire my new kitty and leave, she mentioned that my player character looked vaguely Italian, and made an off-color comment about not wanting her silver/jewels to go missing.

What is this, the turn of the century, last century?

At Hurk’s place, you can meet his dad, who wants to build a wall. What, no, not a wall down there. A wall in the north, to keep out those accursed Canadians and their liberal ideology.

Addressing controversy by obfuscating the real world equivalent is cute, but it lacks the punch that makes it such that it’s proving some kind of point. Here, it’s npc’s that you’re expected to stay on good terms with, so that you can get more quests and goodies, like a new pet or ride.

(Shame you never get a new pet who is also your new ride, though.)

And why? Because they’re supposedly better than the cultists who only physically hurt and impede people different than themselves? What’s the takeaway here supposed to be, that it’s only physical extremism that’s bad and--oh god wait no, it’s Bioshock Infinite all over again.

Of course, we all know the real reason why. To offend as few people as possible. Because every offended party is a potential lost sale. Hence why despite clearly using Christian/Baptist imagery and motifs, no cultist ever actually mentions Jesus by name, and the peggy symbol only vaguely and technically resembles that of a cross.

I’ve bad news for you, though, Ubisoft; it’s too late. If you wanted to offend as few people as possible, it was already over the instant you let writers set it in a rural, dominantly Christian, dominantly white community, in America. Right wing talking heads were lining up to be officially offended the instance promos started showing bad guys toting guns, bibles, and the American flag.

Because despite bragging about having thick skin, when it comes down to it, they typically don’t.

At some point, you almost want to lean in uncomfortably close to the game’s face and tell it “Go on. Say what you really mean.” And it never does. Making it satire with no teeth, which isn’t actually satire, but parody. It’s a flag-waving, gun-toting parody of American culture. It’s an American beer commercial meets Saint’s Row. It’s a romanticized outdoorsy rural locale with tacky looking guns and gruesome murder set to made-up gospel and old rock hits.

Which doesn’t feel that far off from a Saint’s Row game, but it wildly conflicts with the tone Far Cry 5 very quickly establishes for itself. And it’s such a waste, because to use an on-theme colloquialism, “bless its little heart.”

It’s trying so hard, and there are some things I can’t help but enjoy about it.

There was a moment early on, when I was creeping through the bushes of a small neighborhood as slowly and quietly as I could. I had not but a bow and a pistol to my name. Cultists were stacking dead bodies while their speaker-mounted truck played their very own choir, singing about water washing away sin. As they were finishing up, they began to sing along.

It was as First Blood meets Jim Jones as the entire game felt, and it all just clicked. The gameplay and tone all lined up so perfectly and felt so right. Where did that go?

Luckily, the game is also pretty charming in various other inadvertent or otherwise unintentional ways.

Obviously it’s cute and wholesome that you can pet all the non-hostile animals. But it’s completely adorable how Peaches growls at you when you go where she can’t follow.

There’s also random npc’s you can recruit for the game’s buddy system, aside from the nine named specialty partners. At first, I seriously wondered how any of them could compare to Peaches, the oversized mewling kitten, or Grace, the cool as a cucumber sniper lady.

But then I found some lady named Evie, who looked like somebody’s mom, and I honestly found it hard to part with her. There was something so ernest and amusing about the idea of somebody’s mom who used to embarrass them at every PTA meeting or bake sale, now in an awkwardly-fitting militia vest yelling “Get some!” to every other cultist who dared cross our path.

The gameplay is also varied enough with timed races, and puzzling treasure hunting segments. The latter in particular, I really enjoyed. They had me doing everything navigating mazes of fire to hopping and swinging along successive grapple lines under a bridge, skirting river water along the way. It’s good, varied fun.

I also really appreciate the organic way in which story beats are unlocked, which is really saying something for a sandbox. Normally, there are specific missions that unlock the next cutscene that actually matters, and everything else feels like so much filler and padding.

Far Cry 5 had the genius idea that everything should contribute to an overall progress bar. This makes it that nothing feels like padding, as you’ll always be working toward the next story beat, even if you’re doing what feel like side quests.

But it’s one step forth and one step back with you, isn’t it Far Cry 5?

Once you’ve unlocked the next story beat, you’ll be whisked away to the next cutscene to have one of the villains get in your face for the next five minutes, whether you were ready for that or not. It gets annoying after the second time, and downright numb the fifth or sixth.

It’s also where the writing starts to fall apart some more.

You know that old James Bond trope where the bad guy has him right where they want him? But then because the villain is so contrived in how they want to handle him, he ends up getting away? Well that happens almost every time. It’s cheesy.

Also where some of the worst writing in the game comes into play.

Jacob Seed has a neat gimmick, I’ll admit. He’s all about classic conditioning, A Clockwork Orange style. Alright, interesting enough. And instead of escaping, you wake up, presumably days later, having finally escaped his mind control. It was a neat twist at first.

What’s incredibly stupid though is everyone points it out. Dutch, Eli, all characters who know about Jacob’s MO, and none of them think anything suspicious about it. Nope, just “Hey, now that I can finally get in contact with you after an entire week of you not responding, come back and get uncomfortably close to me and people I care about.”

Nobody thinks anything’s up with that? Even after it happens three or four times?? And not even my own character thinks to warn them that I’m being psychologically manipulated to kill them???

Oh. Look at that. The game made me kill Eli. How very unsurprising. What is that, something like four hours of build up to a twist anyone could see coming if they’ve ever seen a story?

“Who cares, it’s fun, isn’t it?”

I mean, yes, sure. It’s very fun, in fact. Fewer things have been more satisfying than timing it just right to take down three baddies at once, with a sniper shot from Grace, a mauling from Peaches, and a throwing knife from myself.

And like I said before, the gameplay is just varied enough to not grow dull. But what should be a good game is held back by mediocre writing and a lack of commitment.

Weirder than any of it though is the troves of people lining up to say it doesn’t matter, because the game is fun. Listen, I can enjoy the gameplay for hours of mind-numbing fun, but still be able to pick apart everything wrong with the overall experience. There’s nothing really wrong with that. It doesn’t completely impede what enjoyment I, or anybody else, was able to get out of it.

I really don’t get this, though. This is no critique of the game itself, mind you, but it is at fault for bringing it up again, even if by accident. So it bears discussion.

Clean Prince was right when he said that Far Cry 5 brought up a lot of what’s wrong with modern gaming culture. Yet I can’t help but disagree with his reasoning behind this statement. Because he, like many, asked why any of it matters, so long as the game is fun.

Look.

Gamers clamored for years, demanding our hobby be taken seriously. Entire groups and brands like Extra Credits formed, to try and gain for games the same respect film and literature already had.

Nowadays, we have critics aplenty, like Super Bunny Hop, and the above-mentioned Errant Signal, who regularly dissect games with the same attention to detail movies, shows, and novels receive.

We did it. We’re here. We made it, right?

No.

People tear down bad writing in games, and suddenly it doesn’t matter. The game being fun is the only feature that matters, now that it’s convenient to dismiss anything that seemingly gets in the way of your enjoyment.

Even though it doesn’t.

If Far Cry 5 were a film, people would be trampling over each other to repeat the critics’ disregard of its milquetoast shotgun approach to writing, and lack of commitment to an actual point, despite advertising itself as any kind of satire.

It’s not like having an actual statement is foreign to Far Cry either. Far Cry 2 had a well implemented theme of deterioration in every aspect; your character’s health thanks to the malaria, the guns falling apart from being old, fire spreading wildly out of control.

It’s not even necessarily a Ubisoft problem either.

Far Cry 3 was all about the lengths you’d go to for the people you care about, and how growing and changing as a person ends up alienating you from them anyway. There was also an underlying theme about there being no real winners in a setting so deeply seeded with violence.

Ending sucks too. That’s not a good transition, but it’s as good of one as it deserves, to be frank.

It’s awful, but not because it’s unsatisfying and you don’t get to technically win. Not every game needs to end on a positive note, just because you work for it. Spec Ops: The Line had some of my favorite gut-punch endings in a game.

But the takeaway is just bad, for either ending.

Either you walk away from Joseph at the end, and Jacob’s conditioning kicks in again, and you kill everyone you just saved, or randomly and completely out of bumbling nowhere, several nuclear warheads go off around the tristate area. And everyone you just saved dies in irradiated fire anyway.

What’s the takeaway here? That we should just let dangerous people get away with violent uprisings, because hey, who knows, they may actually have been right all along?

The nuclear ending especially is just bad writing. It’s a twist out of left field meant to shock, and take you by surprise, but only because there’s nothing to indicate it’s going to happen. It’s trying, and failing, to ape the nuke scene from the first Modern Warfare game. But that scene was the dramatic release after an entire level’s worth of building tension regarding the bomb which was mentioned earlier. Of which said established tension, there’s simply none here.

Each region even caps off with you burning out the cult’s various bomb shelters. Only to find out, what? That you should’ve given up and let them kill and maim and steal all they like, so you could huddle down next to them in their bunkers? All because some uninformed zealot who doesn’t even sound like he’s actually looked at a bible lately made a lucky guess?

No thanks.

Instead of inspiring shock and awe, the ending feels random and nonsensical. Once again destroying any coherency the overall tone the game could’ve had. Is this supposed to be a fun, silly game to be enjoyed with a beer or a friend?

Or a serious and somber game where you face the deepest human fear of all: how people manage to justify overt acts of pure evil as “the right thing?”

All in all, Far Cry 5 is like a cheap burger from a fast-food joint. The taste is fine and it’ll tide you over, but it’s probably not very good for you. And you can’t help but think about how much better it looks in the pictures on the menu.

#video games #review #Far Cry 5 #spoilers #rabbot reviews

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capeshifters · 6 years

Text

all muses

All muses shortly

italics - pc bold- canon normal -oc

some muses might have verse specific ships or they are not shippable at all

DRAGON AGE

Nedra Surana // mage elf warden- hof | multiship | pansexual | FC: Lindsey Stirling

Narya Lavellan // dalish inquisitor |Single ship with @thebloodychampion in her main verse, other verse open | heterosexual | FC: Emile De Ravin

Merlyn Lavellan // Narya’s cousin, archer and hunter | multiship- | homosexual | FC: Eddie Redmayne (inquisitor verse available)

Litriel Lavellan // mage, necromancer and dreamer, also Narya’s cousin and Merlyn’ sister | multiship | heterosexual| FC: Alina Kovelenko

Nova Lavellan //dalish Inquisitor, has a very bad eyesight, necromancer, dreamer and uses wisps to see. loves dragons | multiship |heterosexual | FC: Lauren De Graaf

Lesi Aras //the master of smith work. Has her won shop, very inspired by Dagna | multiship | heterosexual | FC: Isabela Moner

Rin Ril Seraya //born to be female, works as a body guard of an Orlesian Lord. Disguised |multiship |undecided | FC: Winona Ryder

Aila Synelis// young elf, has a two years old girl, waitress,sweet but too trusting |multiship | heterosexual | FC: Dasha Sidorchuck

Armando Fiorenci // ex first enchanter o the circle in Dairsmuid, Rivain. Escaped death. jolly and a good mage. mage rights supporter.| multiship | pansexual | FC: Sam Elliott

Francesca Fiorenci // Armando’s sister, made tranquil. Whereabouts unknown | multiship | heterosexual | FC: Oona Chaplin

Kai Kresge // magekiller, from tevinter |multishp| pansexual | FC: Ian Bohen

Kaisa Kresge// Kai’s little sister, mage and healer and herbalist, blind.| multiship |heterosexual | FC: Elise Aarnik

Sherborne Guyader “Guy” // professor of history and arts at the university of Orlais. born in Antiva | multiship | bisexual fc: Eoin bailey

Anna Alerion // mage ,dalish, slave, servant. Now Marquis tool for his twisted desires. Secretly when able she plots to free elves.- | multiship |bisexual

Regina le Bail // ex slave, run away from tevinter, mage but uses spear to fight, companion with a wolf | multiship | heterosexual | FC: Maia Mitchell

Alan Bearhold //avvar warrior, hunter, tall man, grumpy , protects his little sister |multiship |pansexual | FC: Manu Bennett

Valerie Bearhold// mage, talks to spirits, healer, herbalist, skilled. - | multiship |heterosexual | FC: Rachel Weisz

Millicent Cadash // Inquisitor, badass rogue, thief, spy, dwarf and what else.| multiship | heterosexual | FC: Amy Manson

Devon Trevelyan // mage. from Ostwick Circle, born as a bastard son to a servant of Trevelyan family. Skilled mage, flirty but good mannered. | multiship |pansexual | FC: Richard Madden

Bella Lupus // Dragon Age - Tevinter mage, black mage, small woman, good at magic- multiship-heterosexual

Marcus Lupus // Bella’s little brother, warrior, has prosthetic arm and leg | multiship | bisexual | FC: Matthew Daddario

Janus Lupus // Bella’s and Marcus father, magister, master and killed by his brother.|single ship with @thebloodychampion |homosexual | FC: Luke Evans

Alceon Lupus // middle brother , brother of Janus, evil and mean magister. |no ship | bisexual | FC: Ansom Mount

Adrian Lupus // youngest brother, magister at the seat, divorced, likes elves | multiship.| pansexual |FC: Tom Pricone

Luca Lupus//Adrian’s son, rogue, likes training and solitude | multiship |pansexual | Fc: Adian Gillen

Gigi Trevelyan (Auriel// mercenary and Inquisitor - burns scars on her hands and feet - assassin || multiship |heterosexual | FC: Sarah Bolger

Rufus Trevelyan // ex- templar , Gigi’s uncle - mage friendly- never too old for fun | multishipo | pansexual | FC:Rufus Sewell

Adam Hawke // Hawke, shy dork, loves his dog more than people- | multiship | bisexual | FC: Garrett Hedlund

Anders//he feather mage merged with spirit, not so mage rights obessed- loves cats | single M!Hawke ship with @thebloodychampion (other muses okay to ship) | pansexual | FC: David Garrett

Dorian // the sassy one From house of Pavus- the lost son- the failure | multiship | homosexual | FC: David Gandy

Hampus Luck // archer and companion , noble but hides it, a flirt | multiship |pansexual | FC: Jamie Dornan

Appius Trius “The Architect”// High Priest of Urthemiel, a bit dork, but lovable, magister from the ancient times | single ship verse with @thebloodychampion other verse open | pansexual | Fc: Hugh Dancy

Hay // slave from the ancient times - traveled through a rift |selective ship | heterosexual | FC: Hera Hilmar

Nellie Cousland // hero of ferelden, badass redhead |multiship | heterosexual | FC: Rose Leslie

Jacob Rivera// pirate, thief, treasure hunter | multiship |bisexual | FC: Jarod Joseph

Albany Perdue // non binary, young magister , better than you- | multiship | undecided | FC: ErikaLinder

Lisetta Walgan // chasind scout/hunter - wild and untamed| multishp |pansexual | FC: Karen Gillan

Lilah Bearhold // Lady of The Skies- goddess/avvaar/ - immortal | selective ship| bisexual | Fc: Julie Kennedy/Rachel Ward(old)

Mario Albergotti lamberto De Villacorta // rogue, noble, mercenary |bisexual |Pentaghast Blood |likes dragons | FC: Matthew Mcnulty

Veran Adaar // Vixten’s twin sister | rogue |bisexual

Seranna Trevelyan - Inquisitor and templar | fears magic | bisexual | andrastian | FC: Michelle Alves

OTHER FANDOMS

Quiet // Metal Gear Solid V // sniper and bad ass, does not talk- |multiship |bisexual | FC: Game face/Stefanie Joosten

Diana // Marvel DCEU // Wonder Woman, badass but sweet | multiship | heterosexual | FC: Gal Gadot

Mei // Overwatch// climatologist, blogger, Overwatch agent | multiship | bisexual | FC: Game Face

Catwoman //Marvel // Selina Kyle, the catwoman |multiship |heterosexual | FC:Camren Bicondova

Belle/Lacey //OUAT/Disney// Belle from both Ouat and Disney and Lacey from Ouat | multiship | heterosexual | Emilie de Ravin, Cartoon face, Emma Watson

Red//OUAT-// Red from the series Once Upon A time - werewolf | multiship | bisexual | FC: Meghan Ory

Nagini Nabila // Harry Potter // Voldemorts’ Snake with a canon divergent story, reborn | multiship | pansexual | FC: Nathalie Emmanuel (young)/ Angela Bassett (old)

Augustus Rookwood//Harry Potter// Death Eater, Prisoner in Azkaban, a bit of coward | multiship | bisexual | FC: Tom Payne

Neville Longbottom//Harry Potter// student, later professor, not married yet | multiship | heterosexual | FC: Matthew Lewis

Ailla Longstar // Star Wars // twilek, bad ass pilot, spy | multiship | pansexual | FC: Milla Jovovich

Zara Andromedra // Star Wars // mandalorian warrior, arms for hire, skilled fighter , bounty hunter | multiship | bisexual | FC: Cladia Black

Lilo Young // works in the ministry of magic | FC:Nyakim Gatwech | - Harry Potter

Lassie Young // ministry worker , lilos brother |homosexual| FC: Jordan Bolger | - Harry Potter

Simon Wolfe // Deathh Eater | bi, homoromantic |FC: Alec Secreanu | - Harry Potter

Salvia Pepper // werewolf | heterosexual | FC: Natalia Ramos - Harry Potter

Gilda Gloomsdale // vampire , not dragonborn but can be // FC: Aiyana Lewis - Skyrim

MASS EFFECT

Nedra Shepard//Shepard , biotic, paragon, earthborn, war hero-| multiship | pansexual | FC: Emily Browning

Nigel Shepard// Nedra’s twin, more evil and drunkard and a gambler |multiship| bisexual | FC: Eddie Redmayne

Lisell Avequa// Asari assassin, Has a adopted son Han.|multiship- |heterosexual | FC: Tracy Ifeachor/Danai Gurira

Jirida Avequa//Lisell’s grandma, a bit crazy old asari |no ship- |bisexual | FC: Whoopi Goldberg

Nyx Avequa// an asari consort at Citadel-, not using biotics, kind |single ship |heterosexual | FC: Yaya De Costa

Han Xanis Vas Astra-//LIsell’s adopted son, quarian. Good in tech |- multiship |bisexual | FC: Logan Lerman

Vivia Bonisis // pink turian but good C-sec cyber crime detective - | single ship with @thebloodychampion | heterosexual | FC: Penelope Mitchell

Camilea -// pretty and deadly turian Blue Sun assassin |-multiship | pansexual | FC: Cara Delvigne

Salla Ryder //- female Ryder , biotic | multiship. |bisexual | FC: Emma Watson

Garrus // the one we love. does a lot of calibrating |multiship| bisexual | FC: Andrew Garfield

Liara// the blue doctor and Shadowbroker | multiship |bisexual | FC: Yara Shadhidi

Drack // the old grumpy grandpa | multiship |heterosexual | Fc: Jeff Bridges

PeeBee // the joyful and happy asari explorer|multiship-|pansexual | FC:Senait Gidey

Avitus Rix// turian pathfinder, loves Mason |single ship with @thebloodychampion Mason | homosexual | FC: Charlie Hunnam

Tibesius Suldonis // a hastatim unit leader, gay , married to a woman, manipulated by his friend and ex lover Cosna | Single ship with @thebloodychampion | homosexual | FC: Nathan Fillion

Quitilia Suldonis // sweet, Serlio’s and Silia’s mother, dead by Cosna | no ship | heterosexual | FC:Bridget Regan

Lucius Suldonis // the youngest sibling, model turian, bit of playboy, skilled pilot | multiship | pansexual | FC: Tyler Hoechlin

Serlio Salvilus // Actually son of Cosna’s brother Caius . good in politics, future turian councilor | multiship | bisexual | FC: Josh Bowman

Silia Salvilus-//blind. Serlio’s little sister, had many hardships, works in Citadel , not daughter of Cosna, but born from a relationship her mother had with Haral Nyras. | multiship| heterosexual| FC: Lyndsy Fonseca

Cosna Salvilus // the evil mastermind, took his brother’s life and played him -|no ship-|bisexual | FC: Christian Bale

Caius Salvilus // got in an accident and was in coma and memory loss for decades. Real father of Serlio | multiship | bisexual | FC: Christian Bale

Tokol // pink, hanar and definitely not someone you should trust | no ship| asexual | Fc: game face

Anaya Kiuk // a young drell assassin, suffers from deadly illness , works for Tokol- | multiship | bisexual | FC: Naomi Scott

Sunip Molane // a salaria assassin, scientist , works for Tokol |multiship |demisexual | Fc: Allyson Hannigan

Bono Baffabar-//batarian mercenary and assassin, works for Tokol -| multiship | bisexual | FC: Jake Gyllenhaal

Luc Laxius// turian business woman, mother of twins | no ship-heterosexual | FC: Meryl Streep

Maxius Kryik // son of Nihlus Kryik, C-sec officer |multiship |pansexual | FC: Sebastian Stan

Titus Faion // thief and turian, disguises as a male | multishp- heterosexual | FC: Charlize Theron

Tasha Tissel // ex asari assassin, now a doctor | single ship with @thebloodychampion | heterosexual | Fc: Chrishell Stubbs

Magnar Shepard // the viking, tall and blond, gets the job done- | multiship | pansexual | FC: Chris Hemsworth

Camephilia Octatus// Camilea’s little sister, young, raised on Omega | no ship, single ship in the future times with @thebloodychampion | heterosexual | fc: Anna von Klinski

#better post probs tomorrow with icons and more info #in case i take ym time with bios XD #out of stardust : ooc.#muses

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nothingman · 6 years

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Jon Bernthal in "Marvel's The Punisher" (Credit: Netflix/Nicole Rivelli)

Flattened and perverted by a generation of us-or-them, with-us-or-against us psychomachia-inspired messaging from the right (and left), even the very idea of heroism has been corrupted almost beyond recognition in America.

For many, snipers, men who kill at the distance of over a football field, are heroes. So too are cops and civilians who kill without reason and outside of the law. Politicians who mouth Christian values, without walking the walk, are heroes. Anyone who commits any kind of crime, belongs to the wrong community, comes from the other side of the political spectrum or simply offers any kind of dissent to traditional, calcified values are evil, eternal villains to this same population.

In this post-9/11, polarized country, where many believe counterfactually that crime is now more of a threat to American lives than ever before, it’s little wonder that the iconic symbol of the Punisher, the Marvel comic-book character, can be seen on the uniforms of our military personnel and the police cars that patrol our streets.

Clad in black with a massive skull across his chest, the former Force Recon Marine also known as Frank Castle kills criminals at all levels and of all kinds without remorse or sympathy — doing the vital job, as the logic for many goes, that the corrupted official justice system isn’t strong, brave or honest enough to do.

For these people — mostly men — Superman, Batman, Captain America and even the real-life cop on the beat and the judge behind the bench have all lost the thread and lack the guts it takes to bring peace and balance into our world. These are the same people that cheer Zack Snyder’s murderous, Randian takes on Batman and Superman in the Warner Bros. DC film franchise, the same people who see cops in military body armor in real-life America as an unfortunate, but necessary step to quell the unrest they see as consuming the public sphere.

Frank Castle, M249 SAW at his side, has those guts. The street-level vigilante is, for a significant subset of our country, the hero we need right now.

But as Frank Castle, two-dimensional on the printed page and in the new Netflix series, reminds his audience regularly, he is nothing of the sort. Moreover, the war he wages has no relation to the America we live in.

Yes, Frank lives by a code of justice, one he believes is ultimate and higher than that of anyone else. But even he understands that the way he executes it, while just, is not right. He knows he’s eventually going to the hell he imagines he sends his targets to.

Castle looks at Captain America, Thor, Iron Man and understands them as weak, as unwilling to do what needs to be done. But he also understands that these Avengers are the true heroes. He, by his own admission, is a revenger who understands his absolute war on all crime and on all criminals is neither tenable or ethical from 360 degrees.

“When it’s all over,” Frank says of his black-and-white battle against crime in “Moon Knight” vol. 3 #10, “when they’re all dead and the war is over, there’ll still be one bullet left to clear all accounts.” Here he admits that he deserves exactly the absolute punishment he deals out and, if necessary, will apply it to himself.

And besides, as the comics and the TV series make clear, Frank’s crusade is a personal one he wages out of rage, hurt and anger. Triggered by the murder of his family, Castle doesn’t operate out of a sense of nobleness or self-sacrifice, but — much like the Charles Bronson “Death Wish” character he is patterned after — the transference of his own pain onto the world at large. Essentially, his categorical framework for justice is rooted in personal psychosis.

Captain America, long the moral standard bearer of the Marvel Universe put it more simply when he beat the living hell out of the black-clad vigilante after he killed inactive criminals in front of the star-spangled hero in 2006’s “Civil War” miniseries. “Frank Castle is insane,” he said.

As Castle’s character has evolved from his beginnings as a Spider-Man foil near the end of the Vietnam War (Frank was originally portrayed as a vet of that conflict) to his rise as a popular antihero in the Reagan Era and beyond, this has become all the more clear.

Through and following Garth Ennis’ now-definitive take on the Punisher, the idea that whatever darkness powers his crusade existed inside him long before his family died has been established as canon. The simple theory here is that many people lose their families to violence in the real and fictional worlds (Batman included), but almost none of them reactively launch into homicidal wars against the universe. That takes a different kind of mind. Frank, it seems, always had one.

For easy kicks, morally gray narratives and, yes, good, old-fashioned revenge-fantasy jollies, Castle works brilliantly and satisfyingly when limited to the printed page or the television screen. More than that, his almost Heideggerian or Nietzschean (take your pick) dedication to a simplistic, one-lane moral/ethical code has an interesting effect when kept to the confines of fiction.

Unlike other comic-book characters, Frank has no qualms about his actions even if he understands that his position has its faults. While other characters spend umpteen panels and plenty of ink doing the work of teasing out the moral questions involved their actions for the reader through tortured, wandering exposition (see “Civil War,” “Civil War 2” and “Captain America: Civil War”), Castle forces the audience to do that work for themselves, to engage and labor with a sometimes — though certainly not always — challenging text.

So, yes, often reading a Punisher book is just about sitting back and unironically enjoying the carnage as a man solves his and the world’s problems with a M60 or M1911 (Frank likes his Vietnam-vintage tools). Regularly, though, it means confronting the faulty logic of Castle’s problem-solving approach, one that normally admits no possibility for rehabilitation, mercy or error.

But out in the real world — where criminals and military opponents also happen to be real people, where bias and misidentification exist, where everything is even less black and white — people in military units, police departments and in the civilian public are not doing that work. There, the Punisher has become a totem of a false belief that, yes, America is in an existential war with threats from within, that the well-researched evidence that violent crime has been on a downward slide for decades is somehow opposite of reality.

This is the same theory that has made us the nation of manifestly harmful mandatory minimums, of treating convicts like caged beasts, of Ferguson, of Tamir Rice and Freddie Gray, of police-training programs called “Killology,” of an absolute war on terror whose prosecution only increases, not decreases, our number of enemies, of Jeff Sessions’ belief that marijuana is the same as Fentanyl, of almost everything President Donald J. Trump says and does. It’s a toxic categorical framework without nuance, kindness or nobleness, and Frank Castle is its unfortunate mascot.

The Punisher is a great character in a 2D universe where evil exists and the world can actually be saved by a handful of adventurers in a matter of pages. Outside of it, he’s a death’s head symbol of an vicious ideology that only sees America at its worst and looks to absolutism as a way out. The fact that he’s a hero of our times suggests just how desperately in need of revision of our shared notion of heroism and ourselves we really are.

via Salon: in-depth news, politics, business, technology & culture Salon

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