#for context I am listening to tma all over again

[clown-eating-pig]

bro has THREE WHOLE ASSISTANTS but still immediately jumps to say Martin’s name without asking any further questions.

gayass 🙄

#tma #the magnus archives #tma spoilers #jonathan sims #teaholding #jmart #jon is so stupid I want to throw him at the wall like a bouncy ball #my only entertainment in this prison of mine #for context I am listening to tma all over again #and just continuously being hit by the humor of every part of this show

[lemonhemlock]

i am way too late for any of this, but i felt like ranting a little (a lot) over tma, so here it goes.

i actually really, really liked the dreamlike quality of the S5 statements. i think they're some of jonny's best work. so evocative and just beautifully written, the feeling of horror so prevalent, so delicate, so entrapping. i would listen to them absolutely enthralled. what a submersive experience. so on that front, 100% would recommend.

the problems i have are mainly with the meta-plot. certainly, personal preferences and biases come into play here, bc i despise jonmartin with the fire of a thousand suns and would have loved a jonelias corruption narrative, but, i feel that, in his quest to appease the j-mart shippers, jonny sacrificed a lot of his story's integrity. also, i have no way of verifying this, but it also felt like he inserted his own biases in a way that wasn't necessarily productive.

ultimately, i feel like he disrespected his main antagonists and that essentially translated into a sort of irreverence towards his own story. elias was easily his most dramatic and interesting villain (regardless of what he originally intended for him, it's how he developed throughout the story & i think there is a certain honesty in a writer acknowledging and respecting that), stole every scene he was in, yet after his great villain reveal in S4, he is absolutely absent throughout his entire apocalypse. it creates a lack of catharsis that i find bothersome. his death is way too easy. yet when he finally appears in MAG 193, it is glorious. he is terrifyingly in the throws of religious ecstasy as the eye's pupil. such an interesting idea! so little it was developed though bc jonny for some reason doesn't like elias.

there's this entire commentary about how elias is really just there to be eye's pupil until jon takes over from him, bc it's jon the eye truly desires. as if after faithfully serving the beholding for two centuries and bringing about his ritual, the eye would just disregard elias and actually be interested in the one person who is unwilling to play ball. please be serious. not saying that jon can't be the eye's "special little boy" or whatever, but the nerfing of elias/jonah borderlines on petulant. ofc, jonny is the author and you cannot begrudge a man for writing whatever he wants, but, as a listener, i have to say it feels very unsatisfying whenever authorial biases directly affect the storyline. very deus-ex-machina. very unearned.

i also have a problem with how the eye was ultimately handled and, once again, nerfed. the introduction of this element in relation to the beholding, that it sees but does not understand, felt very trite to me. it was added as a way to de-power the eye and elevate the web. but how could it even be true in the context of the entity conceptualization? the reason scopophobia is a thing is because people fear someone is behind the watching. what they fear is judgment or someone keeping tabs on them and using that information to harm them in some way. that requires intelligence, a capacity to distinguish between the harmless and the incriminatory, a propensity for casting moral judgment, of holding people accountable, of assigning blame, of discovering people's deepest, darkest secrets, of weaponizing shame. no one is afraid of a crow or a cat staring back at them, because, while those are also living beings, they lack the higher intelligence that creates the context necessary for scopophobia. so how can the eye not possess intelligence? apparently it doesn't, because jonny decided he didn't like the eye and the spider was oh-so-cooler instead.

but that only lead to the spider being way too overpowered than it should have been. as the so-called brain of the operation, the web really manifests a lot of faults that could have been exploited, yet the character never do, because the web needs to be true It Girl for some reason. this all feels very childish. the web's motivations do not work in-universe. we are often told it doesn't have a ritual because it is content with playing its games of manipulation within the world as it currently is. and that honestly seemed a rather fair assessment to make, but later proved to be a red herring, because it was the web that was actually behind the eye's own ritual.

i have several gripes with this. 1. if the spider is so smart, why doesn't it/can't it have its own ritual and re-shape the world according to its own preferences? why does it have to piggyback on the eye's grind? 2. the spider's big plan seems to be bringing about the eyepocalypse just to convince the characters to let the fears out into the metaverse so it can start again. because, as it turns out, the eyepocalypse isn't really it's preferred state of being? it was the status-quo after all? the web DID prefer the world as it was, because it allowed it to thrive off manipulation and puppeteering, things it can't really engage in as much as it would like, since now everyone is trapped inside various fear domains. so, why-oh-why, not just leave the world as is? why even bring about an apocalypse in the first place if your intention is to always inhabit a apocalypse-less place?

i felt like this was such a plot-hole of an explanation the way it was presented. the web's greatest flaw was that it loved intricate plots so much there was a real danger of over-complicating its own plans and failing to see the forest from the trees, so to speak. the eye could have been used not to boggle down on meaningless details and ramifications, but to get a better sense of the bigger picture, something the web could very well lose sight of (pun intended). so the web's "plan" could have been ultimately rendered meaningless, because instead of choosing the simplistic, straightforward, occam's razor solution (no apocalypse, just thrive off the world as it is), it chose the overly complicated path that placed it in a situation it didn't thrive in (eyepocalypse) and made it even more complicated to get out of in the first place. it basically surrendered its destiny into the hands of people who had zero reasons to act sympathetic and could have very well chosen to destroy the entire world, fears included. and yet i am supposed to be in awe of the web's great intelligence and buy into the whole dumb eye propaganda?

many things have already been said about the moral dilemma at the end of S5 and my take on that is that jon was right. it was the merciful and just solution to prevent other people from other universes from suffering at the hands of fear entities. but i will be indulgent and account that it is a difficult choice to make for anyone, since human beings are so survivalist in nature and the choice to just make the fears someone else's problem in the hopes of their plans maybe getting foiled more effectively by others is tantalizing. who knows what any of us would have chosen had we been in their situation? perpetuating the horrors on someone else just so you could get reprieve is so cravenly but it's human and i get it. however, by no means is this a happy ending the way it was framed by the narrative. what melanie, georgie, basira and martin did was horrible and evil, but it is never acknowledged in that way. the least jonny could have done is have jon resist martin's selfish decision and have martin genuinely kill him. but, no, martin gets his romantic send-off together with jon, with the open possibility that they get transported to another world where they could start over. melanie, georgie and basira get to start a new life in the entity-less world, after contributing almost nothing. the worst characters get to live & they're validated in their awful behaviour.

however. i do feel like there were other ways to resolve the eyepocalypse without resorting to a horrible sophie's choice in the first place, but that would require a more extensive endgame re-write.

#i also think that the ending was peddled like a tragedy just bc jon & martin didn't live #but imo the ending was pretty horror-like to begin with #the fears escape into the multi-verse and get to terrorize a new set of people! #also if you ask me the fact that melanie/georgie/basira live is a tragedy in and of itself #but ofc the narrative frames it as a good thing #the magnus archives #elias bourchard #the archivist #anti jonmartin #jonelias #putting this in the tag bc that would have been the superior plot line #the beholding #the eye #here i am running my mouth off again #tma critical #magnus critical

[nyastyaraspurrtina]

Question for youuuuu

Hi! I have never actually listened to the mechanisms, but I’m a big tma fan and really like the very slight aus where it’s like the mechanisms were the archivists college band things, so I’ve read a lot of fanfic that basically references them with not a lot of context yk?

Also. Because I have watched some rusty quill stream vods on YouTube, I’m now getting like 9 second mechanisms clips recommended to me.

And. Last little thing. I am a big alt folk person, and last night I remembered this band I love that I basically totally forgot about and hadn’t been listening to for a bit, and went and just shuffled their songs and it was great. (Robert hallow and the holy men! If you were curious)

But. I was like scrolling through the similar artists, and the mechanisms showed up again.

So now partly because I just keep seeing them come up and partly because of curiosity. I’m tempted to actually check them out.

But I’m really bad with new music, just kind of in general I like my comfortable and familiar songs. And I know really nothing about them besides like. Some of their names and the whole like immortal space pirate thing. But like musically? I have like no info.

So basically uh.

What should I expect? What like. Kind of music would I be getting into? Is it worth it?

I’m asking mostly because I’m looking for someone to be enthusiastic so I have a reason to push my hesitancy against new things aside btw.

Sorry this is so long lmao, and thank you :)

OH MY GOD????? IM FUCKING HONORED THANK YOU

Okay so to start out with, they have 4 main albums. Once Upon A Time In Space, The Bifrost Incident, High Noon Over Camelot, and Ulysses Dies At Dawn. They tend to vary in terms of what their music sounds like, but they always have the same instruments, more or less. (Glockenspiel, flute, drums, sometimes Jonny on the harmonica, bass, guitar that I honestly cannot tell if it's electric or acoustic, viola, violin, Jessica Law's amazing vocals, and I think that's it but I'm probably forgetting something else). High Noon Over Camelot has a lot of Western influence, and is very folk-leaning-country, is the best way I can describe it?

You said you listen to TMA, so here's a couple people to know - Frank Voss and Jessica Law. Frank Voss plays Ashes O'Reilly, an arsonist who burned down their home planet and joined up with the Mechs. Here's the song with their backstory. It's very much like jazz, I think. In TMA, Frank Voss plays Basira Hussain. Jessica Law plays the Toy Soldier, a sentient wooden man (or, according to a tweet she made, a metal man that just looks wooden?) It essentially pretends to be alive, and will obey any order given to it. It pretended to be a rich lady's husband for a while, and then fell in love with an Angel - when it wasn't reciprocated, it ripped out the Angel's voice box. Not sure if it uses it as its own voice box, I forgot. No backstory song for TS sadly :(((. In TMA, Jessica Law plays Nikola Orsinov! And then there's Jonny Dville, first mate, killed his dad for money, killed the guy who paid him to kill his dad, burnt down the guy's casino, and joined up with the Mechs. Here's the song with his backstory. Not quite sure what genre that song falls under, sorry! Jonny D'ville is played by Jonny Sims, who is Jonathan Sims. Don't worry, it's really easy to remember /j.

Anyways, I'm gonna assume you're not very familiar with their whole shtick from what you said - basically, each of their albums tells a story, except for Tales To Be Told Vol 1 and 2. In those, all of the individual songs tell individual stories. There is Death To The Mechanisms, but I'd listen to that last. You can listen to the other albums in any order, though! There are some songs that are entirely narration, no singing. If that's not your thing, TheVoidSings on YouTube, who is an absolute SAINT, has a playlist of all the tracks that do NOT have that narration.

Now, the music type. WARNING FOR GUNSHOT NOISES IN ALMOST ALL THE ALBUMS. Not sure if that bothers you, but they do often have gunshot sound effects. If you like, I can compile a list of songs that have the gunshot effect so you can avoid it, if it would make it a no go for you. High Noon Over Camelot - Western. Heavy folk & country. Once Upon A Time In Space....not sure what to class it as. It's a mixture of things. It can be very loud and fast-paced, but sometimes slow? There's some songs that are like a waltz. Some are very fast and loud. The Bifrost Incident - the best thing I can class it as is "train". Very loud, fast-paced, but melodic in a way. Ulysses Dies At Dawn is heavy blues influence, kinda jazz? idk I don't really listen to jazz sorry :(. And while I am biased, it is ABSOLUTELY worth getting into. Like I said, if a whole album at once seems too intimidating, Tales To Be Told vols 1 and 2 have individual songs that each tell a story. Their music as a whole is always pretty loud and fast paced, so don't go into it expecting waltz, classical, slow and soft stuff.

I'm sorry this took me so long to answer 😭😭😭 I hope this is OK please let me know if you have any more questions!!!!!!

#mechsposting #long post

[marlasomething]

(my) Mag a Week: ...Ending In Sight For Us

Hello there! I am participating in the "a mag a day" idea by @a-mag-a-day which is BRILLIANT and I decided to do "statement a week", rolling dice with the characters and fears that were ftw that week in the episodes I have listened. For today I rolled Archivist!Jon (so I made him evil, once again) and The Web (Eps. 199-200 + Martin's Poetry). It's a Season 5 style one...only one left after this one! This is going to be the last one of the regular "route". Of course, I have hiatus and end of season that I will be doing weekly until I finished them and then...we will see. I know I do not have a huge audience, but...to everybody who has read, liked, shared and/or comment: THANK YOU FOR THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART. TMA means the world to me and doing this has been a very rich creative experience...so I left part of my heart in this last story. (And, yes, the title is a Mechs reference, sorry not sorry) As usual, please do forgive my quick tipper and non-native speaker mistakes, Marla Allons-y! CW: ok, this one is kind of hard. I tried to make the second person even more intrusive, there is basically no horror, just very angsty real-life situations in an oniric manner. Lost of control, self-steem issues, ED discussion, a bit of swearing, job-university anxiety, death, complete corruption of a character, a very slight body horror and mentions of suicide. Also on AO3!

 Of decision making and its ultimate consequences.

 Audio recorded by The Archivist, in situ.

You wished they stopped helping . It doesn’t matter the context; there is always someone trying to “be useful”, telling you which road you should take before you can even get the chance to choose for yourself. Or even worse: just as you have taken a decision on your own, so both possible paths get blurred inside your mind, until you are not certain whether they were always the same, yours was better or maybe theirs, because they tend to know better (or, better put: you are more likely to know worse ).

It doesn’t matter, though, since the chaos on your head freezes your body. You don’t make a decision, you just collapse and they won , for you are now about to take everything they say, just in case.

It feels good, allowing yourself to be controlled by a third party…only, that it isn’t so.

It is not good, not at all.

You are driving a car, you know how to take the curve, and you have done it so many times before. You have a very unique technique, and are a little bit slower than the average person; but it just because you are clumsy! You don’t want to have an accident…

…still, the helping hand is there, taking over and making it easier. It stings, to know someone is doing what you were supposed to be doing better than yourself; but it doesn’t really matter, does it? You shall just enjoy the fact that you will arrive at your destination rather early, instead of barely in time.

You hear the helping hand telling you how lost you would be in your own, how you ought to be much more capable of taking your own decisions. At doing things for and by yourself.

And you want to yell, to scream at their face (or is it faces ?) that you want, that you are actively trying ; but that, if they keep helping over and over…

…but, is it true? Would you really have taking charge?

Would you not have screwed up, being the case so?

“ No, I am eating fine. I promise you. I am just very private about these things… ” and the fact is, that this is all true. You used to be… finicky in a manner that eventually ended up harming your health, but that was over.

Still, all those people (or person?) who had tried to help you…who knew better, who imposed over you with genuine worry until you were taken away any ability to choose, taking control over when and how you eat…they triggered something in you.

And you are not feeding yourself ever again in their presence.

However, they might be right; you have been stressed about so many things lately, and that took a tall on you and, even if they were wrong about how you were being a danger to yourself, you actually were one. So…perhaps, you could allow them to help; or, at the very least, take some of their advice into account.

Would you die if you just simply let go of all your norms and regulations for a week or two?

It isn’t as if they were going to realise they were actually, once again, being the ones choosing for you part of your nurture.

No, no, no. You will just…do a few changes of your own and hope it works. Just…they won’t look at all like anything they had said to help you.

Even if your stomach is grunting more than usual, even if not everything you do not choose or think first of has to be wrong…

…you are the only one in control. If you get sick, at least if will because of you and no one but you.

The grunting almost makes you feel alive; powerful over yourself , for once.

Yes, yes: you know the protocol you have to follow in the experiment. You have done it millions of times by now, for fucks shake! Still, there it is; that friend you really love, but that is ever so slightly better at everything, offering a helping hand. An honest one; one coming for love…even though it reeks condescension, the temptation to gratefully welcome the help, right now, when you are struggling, is almost stronger than your stubbornness.

You cannot accept it, right? Because, if you do now, when will you not? How will you prove you can be someone on your own if you keep relying on third parties?

How will you even pass a test if you need a puppeteer for lab practice?

What a fucking joke you would be if you accepted that hand! And yet…you are tired; you have been trying these tests for days now. It doesn’t matter how it makes you feel, how much it takes away from you: you need someone to help you.

That’s the issue, isn’t it? For you, help is a synonym of someone doing things for you. In person, or by ordering you. And you love it just as much as you love pretending you hate to let things out of your control, of your responsibility.

Then, you realised: this isn’t a uni practice. You finished your degree almost a decade ago. No…this is your lab technician job, the one you almost didn’t get after years of failed attempts and unread CVs.

All because you forgot to get your own agenda and relied too much in allowing others to command you how to proceed.

Just as you promised it would never happen again.

Just as you are about to let happen just one more time…

…for now.

 Eh, is that it? All left of your Kindom ?

 Oh, poor Mother of Puppets; you tried to toy with me and I got on top.

 Now, all left of your real is people being pathetic in the most mundane ways. You are not even scaring them! Just causing them normal anguish.

 If there was a next time possible; I would advise you not to try to play with The Archivist. He might end up liking his titl… Tim?! What…how…?

 Tim, stop! It’s me, Jon. I…

 …ah

 “Is it done, Sash?” it was so bizarre to see Tim again; especially like this, with his skin partially turned upside down and parts of his anatomy substituted by manikins. Still, he was Tim; and now Sasha could truly remember him.

 “Yes…things will turn to normal as soon as Martin…you know” that part wasn’t bizarre, just hard. It was for the better, she knew. There was barely anything left of her friend and, whatever there was, had been too broken by Jon’s transformation into a monstrous version of the person he had loved for the other man to have a live in the new world.

 Tim approached her and, even if his touch was a gross mixture of too-fleshy and too-artificial, it felt the warmest she had ever felt in a very long time.

 “Ey, we did it. The world will come back and we, and the others left, and many people who don’t know not care about, will be alright” they kissed.

 And they were, indeed, alright…

 Or, at least, that was they chose to believe.

#a mag a day #a mag a week #mag horror #statement #original statement #the magnus archives #fanfic #tma #magnuspod #jonathan sims #tim stoker #sasha james #evil jarchivist #fic #the web #magnuspod season 5

[radiosandrecordings]

Okay, at risk of sounding like I’ve emerged from Sherlock forums like a caveman thawed from ice (Look I was 8 in 2010 I didn’t know!) I wanna talk about how in TMA tea legitimately is a stand-in for love/comfort. Specifically by looking at it in episodes 45, 81, 122, the season 5 trailer, and 186.

So 45 is the first time we hear about Martin’s whole tea thing. He comes into Jon’s office to ask if he wants tea, and this is quickly dismissed by the Oh God Jon Are You Stalking Tim? Thing but I think it needs to be mentioned because that’s the start of it all. And it recurs through S2, Martin’s constant worry and doting, both in recording and presumably off recording too, enough that it’s remarked on by other characters. He’s derided for it, Tim in 65 saying “Martin just wants a tea party” when expressing how he feels no one in the Institute cares about him, and in 110 Basira says “Look, Martin. I know you care. I know you do. But caring isn’t enough. You can’t just stand next to someone with a cup of tea and hope everything’s gonna be all right.” It seems to be something he himself is embarrassed about as well, “What, sat around drinking tea until the world ends?! Or, you know, it doesn’t. We hope.” in 116 and then again in 117 with “Anyway, I guess I’m just sick of sitting on my hands drinking tea and hoping everyone’s okay.”

So cut to season 3, 81, when Georgie comes home and Jon immediately offers to make her tea. This is something, to the listener’s knowldge, he has never done before. He feels guilty for taking up her time and home (see: cleaning the kitchen) and wants to do something that he’s picked up, consciously or unconsciously, that means ‘Here is something to show I care about you, an act of service and a gift in one. I do this for you because I cannot speak the words I wish to convey myself, so I give you this, which gives the reassurance and comfort that you need’

And she just dismisses him out of hand! Because at one stage (S4 Q&A I believe?) Jonny talks about how he is trying to explore a certain specific dynamic between each set of characters when it comes to their relationships to each other, and I at least like to think of Jon’s relationship with Georgie as being about a lack of information and context, and that’s what created the rift between them, imperfect information being used as a basis for judgement. So here she displays this by just not having the context for what tea means to Jon. She hasn’t seen him in years, hasn’t met Martin yet, has no idea that the reason Jon extends her that offer is as an olive branch, an ‘I care about you’, because that’s what Martin has taught Jon it means. I think that one little line in that first interaction between them we hear is a beautiful little microcosm for how their relationship continues. Jon reaches out to Georgie for connection, but she just doesn’t understand his world. She loves Melanie because Melanie is different to Jon, not as deeply embroiled, she can get out, she can be ‘saved’. Wheras she does not have the knowledge we have, about how the last two years for Jon have been hell, so she just sees someone trying to drag her down and, wisely with the information she has but horrifyingly with the information we have, says ‘No, for my own health I am staying away from this’. 

And then we have 122, in which Jon wakes up from being literally dead, and Basira offers him water. Cold, clinical, impersonal water from the hallway of a hospital. It's practical, clears his throat, and it’s exactly like how Basira treats him. Nothing special, no thought gone into it beyond ‘What is the tactically right thing to do here?’ because the whole of S4 is about Basira showing a startling lack of empathy for Jon, her former frien- Well. Person she is friendly towards. She has branded him as a monster, and thus he gets treated as such. No compassion for those we’ve slapped the label of ‘Evil’ on. And of course, she doesn’t get the subtext, because her whole thing is despite being incredibly intelligent, she has a habit of taking things at face value because she trusted Daisy’s judgement of people and never looked further into it, lest that make her uncomfortable with her actions, and this is exactly what she proceeds to do with Jon. Keep him at a distance. Don’t look in his eyes, lest you see something you recognise in there. And he calls after her, asking that, actually, would she be able to get tea? And she doesn't hear him. She puts a lot of effort into never hearing him. 

But what else had he done after waking up? Oh yeah. He asks “Where’s Martin?”, with such confusion because he cannot imagine a world where someone he took for granted previously isn’t there to offer him reassurance. He says it himself, “Honestly, I’m surprised Martin isn’t –” He’s surprised! And he wants him there. He wants him to be there so badly, just like he isn’t for the entire rest of the season. So he asks for the thing that has meant comfort and kindness to him in his place. And, because Martin is no longer there, he doesn’t get it.

And in the S5 trailer we have this whole thing spelt out for us! Martin brings Jon tea in the safehouse and well, it ain't fuckin tea! And so Jon says 'You can't trust comfort' because that's what tea has always been for him, that steady thing throughout, comfort that he can no longer have. The world is ruined and now tea isn’t even safe from corruption, twisted into something meant to inspire fear in them, a symbol turned on it’s head. And then, 162 Martin finds some left over, under the sink, and that's what they take to the apocalypse. That one last piece of comfort that Jon finds in Martin, in his intelligence and his perseverance and kindness and hope. In his unwavering ability to care, if not for, then about Jon.

... But if we’re tackling ‘Tea’ as a whole we have to divert from the beautiful love story a little and talk about 186, and tea, and trauma. Tea has always been Martin’s thing, so it makes sense it would slip neatly into his backstory. His mother, cold and dismissive and uncaring, requested tea whenever she didn’t want to have to deal with him. It was a way to give him a task, make him feel useful, and a way to get him to leave the room. This is why he began to bring Jon tea. Jon was, unfortunately, a bit like his mother. Someone whom he wanted to please, but didn’t seem to have the time of day for him. So he makes them both tea, because Martin’s mother used it to dismiss him, and then when he tries to apply the same tactic he’s had drilled into him to Jon, Jon originally dismisses him because of the tea. It’s a bother to him, before he realises how necessary that connection is. So now I’m just thinking about this thing that became a source of anguish for Martin, so much so that even as an adult, even after his mother is dead, he still can’t taste oolong without being hit with the memory of that pain and belittlement. And how Jon, with some time and character development, took that thing he did out of desperation for approval and turned it into something Jon made a pillar of his life, the symbol of Martin in goodness and his love and Jon sought it out every chance he got, and passed it onto others as an act of kindness as well. Martin’s mother meant the tea as a veiled hate, but it got passed down and distilled through enough love that when Jon offers tea to Georgie, what he is saying is “I care about you”. 

#My Post #Me: idk if there's ENOUGH to write about on tea maybe I should wait and see if we get any other tea refs in before the end #Also me: 1379 words on the subject #The Magnus Archives #Martin Blackwood #Jonathan Sims #Jonmartin #Basira Hussain #Georgie Barker #Jongeorgie

[dathen]

~*~BEHOLDING MARTIN MANIFESTO TIME~*~

As promised!!

In TMA 167, Martin was more Beholding than ever before:

Seeking out information that will hurt himself:  Asking what his “domain” was.  This was impulsive, and he didn’t stop to realize that this could be information that could torment him until Jon double-checked to make sure.  

Seeking out information that could hurt others:  Asking Jon if he would have shared the information about the assistants being freed with his death.  I think this was just as impulsive as asking about the domain, and that he didn’t think about the nerve he could be hitting by digging deeper.

Reliving/being trapped in a statement once begun:  He “accessed the archive” in a way we’ve never seen before, and got sucked in and couldn’t stop listening just like Jon in TMA 147 or TMA 160.  It’s possible that this would happen to anyone in earshot, but Martin was able to interrupt Jon in TMA 163.

Has a yet-unnamed domain:  We know of two canon affiliations Martin has with the entities: the Lonely and the Beholding.  It could potentially be another, but the fact we didn’t get an answer leaves this open to Beholding.  Martin did leave the Lonely behind to choose Jon in TMA 159--to choose to See his love.  And what place had Martin chosen, but at Jon’s side?

(Speculation) Possibly filled in some blanks in Annabelle’s conversation:  There are a few theories for why Martin’s description of Annabelle’s call included things she didn’t say, ranging from innocent to horrific, Watsonian to Doylist, but my personal favorite is that he Knew some stuff.  It wouldn’t be the first time.

Frequently, I see Martin held up as the only assistant who didn’t have a Beholding nature.  Tim was searching for information about his brother!  Sasha charged recklessly into danger!  Melanie is pretty much a Jon clone with a youtube channel!  But Martin, where does Martin fit in?

Martin’s a tricky one because I don’t think he started as very aligned to the Eye, but he was conditioned towards it.  A requirement of using the Panopticon was to be aligned with the Eye, and without it an attempt would be “very messy indeed,” in Peter’s words.  But Martin didn’t begin reading statements under Peter’s leadership.  He began under Elias.

Which leads to....the Backup Archivist Theory.

Now, I call it a “theory,” but on my series relisten pre-s5, I realized that it’s pretty explicit in the text to the point that other characters reference it and talk about it openly.  But we didn’t pay too much attention at the time because we didn’t know why a backup archivist would be such an important thing--until TMA 160.

Jonah’s villainous monologue gives us all the context we need for why he would need a backup archivist.  Each time Jonah arranged another of Jon’s scars, e risked losing him altogether and having to start from scratch.  Early on, he barely lifted a finger to make sure Jon survived any attack:

I reasoned if you couldn’t survive a single encounter, you were unlikely to make it through all fourteen. So, when Jane Prentiss attacked, I watched eagerly, one hand on the gas release from the start. 

Jonah’s ambivalence about Jon’s survival leads to the idea that he could always just...start again.  He’d have to redo a few marks, but Jon as the Chosen One was just that--someone he chose.  If Jon failed, Jonah could just choose someone else.

After season 4, I theorized that Jonah had a main backup in mind that changed over the course of the series.  In S1-S2, my guess was Tim, the only other who came to the Institute pre-marked and the only other who was physically scarred in Prentiss’s attack.  But what happens when Tim gets defiant and unmanageable in season 3?  Elias starts putting a LOT of pressure on Martin.  Of the ten statements read by assistants during S3, seven were read by Martin.  The risk of Jon dying was highest at this point, so having someone ready to fall back on makes sense.  A brief timeline of this:

TMA 84 - Martin is the first assistant to read a statement in Jon’s absence.

TMA 86 - Tim refuses to record a statement.

TMA 95 - Martin breaks down after reading a statement, says he hates reading them.

TMA 98 - This is a big one!!      - Martin tells Tim that Elias refused to let him stop reading        statements.      - Tim refuses to help.      - Martin tells Melanie about the pressure Elias is putting on him to read statements, and asks if she could pitch in.      - Melanie offers to ask Elias to cut Martin some slack. 

TMA 104 - Martin takes a coherent statement (!!!!!) from Tim.

TMA 116 - THE BRILLIANT GAMBIT BELOW THAT I MUST ELABORATE ON:

Martin:  No, no!  I can help!  I’ve been reading the statements!

Elias:  Quite right.  Probably best he does stay behind.

Basira:  What, so you have a backup if Jon doesn’t make it?  

Elias:  I’m sure that won’t be necessary.

**WAVES HANDS WILDLY**  IT’S ALL RIGHT THERE!!!   

Remember what they’re trying to do in this scenario: trick Elias into insisting Martin remain behind.  First, you have Martin offering the bait--he’s been reading the statements!  Both his pretending to want to come along and his true goal of being allowed to stay behind assume the same thing: that reading the statements changes him, makes him useful.  Elias takes the bait and plays right into his hands; Martin being conditioned with the statements makes him more valuable to be kept in the Archive.  Why?  Basira point this out immediately, flat-out citing Elias keeping a backup Archivist.  He doesn’t deny it.  

Remember that this was, in Jonah’s words, the most delicate scar to arrange for Jon: the End.  Jonah knew there was a significant risk of Jon not coming back, but by agreeing to let Martin stay behind was giving himself a nice safety net.

....So what does any of this mean?

For one, I think it gives us context to how Martin behaves in season 5.  In season 4, he was locked away behind a door reading statement after statement after statement, playing Peter’s game to gather information about his true goals and the possible dangers to the world, letting the Beholding sink ever deeper.  Season 5 is the first time we’ve seen him interact with anyone but Peter.  Between being saturated in the Lonely for a year and playing the role of a secondary Archivist for even longer, Martin hasn’t come away unchanged on either front.  

Before TMA 167, we mainly saw the Beholding side show through a barrage of practical, mostly-reasonable questions: does Jon Know or know?  How do his powers work?  How does the world work?  How does traveling in it work?  What are the shape of things, their extent, their limits?  We saw that he gets antsy when information is denied or insufficient, such as his turning to Helen for more answers in TMA 166.  But this isn’t all-consuming; he slowed his questions in TMA 164 when Jon hinted that he wanted to wind down, and he distances himself from learning about the horrors around him instead of being drawn to them in fascination.  

When I was getting all excited about Backup Archivist Martin during my relisten, I wasn’t expecting it to have any further plot relevance, just that it was a nice way to explain Jonah’s oddities in how he singled Martin out in S3. 

But now that we’ve seen the Archive and the fledgling Archivist together....I am beginning to wonder if there’s more of this story left to be told.

#the magnus archives #tma spoilers #martin blackwood #I really should have broken this up into two posts but have a lot of thoughts that all interconnect RIP #it's stupid late rn so I'm reblogging again tomorrow

[bisexualoftheblade-old]

how many wips do you have? like what are they all, and not the number of wips in a fandom? what are all the names?

okay. fuck you. fuck you so much. fuck you.

i’m putting this under a read more cut no one else deserves to see this shit. a lot of these are requests, and for those i will just write out the request itself

Shadowhunters:

domestic polycule fluff with tem, jessa, and will because im not a coward

Supernatural

- hehe hoho i request destiel hehehe

- request 61/? cai cai cai cai i need you to rewrite the destiel scene but yk. GOOD. not like i'm in the know about the spn fandom or anything, it's been years for me. but DO IT

Bright Sessions

- caleb/adam grisha AU

- mark bryant vs. united states aka sue the AM

- caleb/adam college fluff

Umbrella Acaademy

- request 31/? i want a ben and klaus drabble please spare me some brotherly bickering

- AND SO BEGINS NIGHT 4 with request 13/? oooh oooh can i get a raymond and allison playlist??? i think their vibes together would SLAP

- hi there night 2 is technically morning 3 but who's counting not me anyway request 5/? can i get a ben moodboard? gotta rep my tua bb

Percy Jackson

- request 9/? can i get a percabeth moodboard or quote edit?? like god they're the og couple goals take me back to high school cai

- For the 100 follower things :D Jercy getting caught in the rain

- request 29/? a drabble about literally anything to do with pjo. i’ll be happy with anyone and anything i’m love these children

- *somersaults in like I’m a real fancy acrobat* hello ello ello may I request some camp half blood chaos possible involving *does a flip* ✨side characters✨ <3

Penumbra Podcast 

- request 52/? drabble about the penumbra podcast. this is for ren bc ren likes it and i don't actually know anything about it. juno? i think? that's the one ren likes. write it for ren

- Tpp ghost hunting / buzzfeed unsolved au

- sad juno smut

- final resting place fic go brrrr

Marvel

- request 6/? i'm going to my roots y'all can i get a spider-man playlist? if not a playlist then i'd honestly be happy with literally anything involving spider-man

- request 15/? i'm going crazy this is recorded evidence of me actually losing it ANYWAY can i get a quote edit for something from iron man? literally anything that man says is gold so cai's choice :D he deserved better in endgame i'm still bitter

- request 42/? do another spidey thing that differs from the other spidey thing

- request 73/? you have Opinions. rant about infinity way and/or endgame. go.

- request 74/? quote edit for deadpool!!

- spideytorch relationship character study

- peter parker as a tired grad student monitoring the young avengers (send help)

Six of Crows

- okay listen i wasn't going to request anything bc i worry about you but also? if you want to/have the time hit me with a playlist for our girl nina zenik

- request 43/? fuckin give me the ending anya should have had. she is alive and with her new son and having a great time

- request 45/? inej moodboard?

- request 47/? will you make literally any meme of your choosing for six of crows?

- request 48/? write a drabble for kaz, my favorite bastard

- okay so i don't actually like nina or mattias that much but i still wanna hear about your thoughts (and also see if you'll change my mind)

- kaz brekker turning 18 fic. birthday party, everyone singing, whole shebang. i need it stat

- religious trauma fic aka i started shipping kaz/alina/inej and i can’t stop

- kaz trauma soup (he has D.I.D. and you can’t prove me wrong)

- my two redacted fics for @grishaversebigbang​

- wesper fake dating

- six of crows bright sessions crossover: everyone gets therapy

TMA

- uhh... s1 gang having a nice time? melanie getting to have some Pride™️? some "fun" horror thing?

- request 7/? spare steph and jason bonding? please sir? spare some for a humble child such as myself?

- okay so this was meant for night 3 but i had midterm shit SO this is honorary night 3 let's DO THIS request 8/? i want a moodboard of extremely out of context magnus archives shit like i mean confuse the FUCK out of me i don't go here i know Nothing about it

- request 11/? OKAY so i need tim stoker meeting tim drake now i need my timmy to meet your tim plus i want to see character differences no i'm not trying to create a tim stoker in my head so i can read a's fic while NOT thinking of tim drake whaaaaaat you're crazy

- request 18(i think)/? i need a quote edit of every time within the first like. 15 eps of tam where jon is like “sounds fake but go off” thank u bb

- request 40/? i challenge you to write a tma drabble based only on the episodes i've heard. i'm currently halfway through episode 23

- Jon being lovingly bullied into taking a break. I'm aware this has been written a million times but it is one of my favorite things.

- spiral!sasha AU

- extinction martin go brrrrr

- high school era timsasha. they've both been friends for years, and everyone always asks when they will be a couple. they decide to fake date, to prove everyone wrong and show what a bad couple they would be. turns out that's a bit trickier than they thought

- after sasha comes back, tim is broken. he can't let go, scared that if he looks away for even a minute he'll lose her again. sasha suggests shibari as a way for him to give up control

- sasha pov mag 19 au, sacrificing herself to save the others, knows that if she gives herself up to the not!them it will let the others live

- this is the "tim finds a polaroid of sasha" trope

- early archives days,, long nights in research,,, clothes sharing,, somft. late nights and falling asleep at their desks warm and safe in the other's presence

- two parts: timsasha as kids, each picking a constellation that is "theirs". just soft kid antics. tim at sasha's grave glancing up to see their constellations

- continuing your job’s a joke (you’re broke)

DC Comics

- TIMSTEPH HADESTOWN AU,,,

- my redacted fic for @batfam-big-bang​

- request for you to get a decent amount of sleep? serious answer, dickkori, SAL's Venus

- request 4/? timsteph morning after 👀 mayhaps?

- a concept: nonbinary stephanie brown

- teehee hi mom, you don’t have to do this if you don’t want to, but can i request damian angst for your accomplishments 100 followers?

- hi you can ignore my first request if you want, or you can ignore this one. but bls possibly write some bikini ra’s? -the bikini bitch

- request 27/? jay is asking through me for a jondami playlist but tbh i also want it so win win yk?

- "I don't know how to help you but I can help you find someone who does" with bruce and jason? im just craving bruce being a good day to jason for once

- “I am putting you in time out because you need to understand the consequences of your actions.” with steph and jason as dumbass disaster bi best friends pretty please?

- request 32/? timsteph patrol date!!!

- request 33/? timsteph *gala* date? mayhaps??

- request 37/? tim drake drabble but make it Edgy cai

- request 39/? drabble of a prank war between tim and damian

- joyfire cuddly fluff please? or like just any outlaw fluff if joyfire isnt your thing (feel free to add every member of the outlaws, dont feel like u gotta stick with jason, kori, roy i love them all)

- barbara and robin! jason fluff? bonding over books or something?

- request 62/? i need a drabble about the chaotic trio jason, tim, and steph i'm love them ty

- request 63/? batfam x mcu crossover. batfam meets ironfam. give me ALL the cliches. ALL OF THEM

- request 64/? young justice x young avengers - jay cuz idk SHIT about the young avengers

- request 66/? jondami moodboard pls and ty

- request 67/? timsteph moodboard!!!!!!

- request 69/? HEHEHE kinky 😏 i would v much like a timsteph drabble of the almost first time. does that make sense? like i don't want you to go all the way NSFW cuz i know that's against the rules and i'm a rule follower. but like they *almost* go all the way. this could be fade to black or some shit i don't care just make it a lil steamy and have Fun

- i request damian angst! all of it

- hmm... maybe i request? jondami?

- mayhaps,,,,some batfam,,,,,committing crimes? ily be gay do crime <3 - lu

- How about a ficlet with Steph and Cass?

Found Family Bingo Prompts

- no powers au

- tunnel

- first day

- join the club

- hurt/comfort

- experiment

- playing favorites

- hold on

- possession

- 10 o’clock

- singing

- road

- snitch

- curfew

- timer

- fantasy au

- zombie au

- dreams

- campfire

- are you okay

- movie night

- games

- scared

Miscellaneous

- a request: Write A Drabble, Coward

- is it too late to request a moodboard for me?

- request 20/? i’m going off book because i’m in a Chaotic Mood™️ can you just absolutely vibe check me like go off cai demolish me

- request 21/? i formally request that you pick a favorite cai. i don’t care what that favorite pertains to, just pick a favorite something

- request 23/? roast me

- request 24/? can i have a buzzfeed unsolved spoopy playlist but spoiler alert it’s not spoopy bc shane doesn’t believe does this make sense it has been a Day™️

- request 25/50 i want a jake and amy fic make it Soft cai i’m love them b99 is so good

- request 28/? i know nothing about the lord of the rings so make something that will confuse the shit out of me

- request 34/? malvie and jaylos moodboards 😈

- request 35/? a moodboard for the bbb mods!! perceive all of us!!!

- request 36/? moodboard for the tua mods too???? mayhaps??

- request 41/? doctor WHO? idk but i want a drabble of him and the one character i know from doctor who which is rose

- request 46/? make an alignment meme with our group, have fun!!!

- request 49/? i want you to kin assign me a character from every fandom you can/want to. go feral

- request 50!!!!/? this is a special request. the most special request. can you make a bastards tbh playlist? i want our vibes encapsulated. i want us in music form. i want to hear those songs and be like "that's me and cai" and smile.

- requests 51/? i know jack shit about good omens. explain it to me in the most confusing way possible. make me know less by the end than i know now

- request 53/? can you write a mel aesthetic? i'm Curious

- request 54/? give me a list of book recs cai i want some good book recs pls

- request 56/? edit a picture of US together too

- request 58/? oooh can i have a disney edit? like. hm. i just really love disney and i want anything to do with disney. like a quote or an aesthetic or an aesthetic edit i just want disney.

- request 59/? i would v much like a recipe for carbonara. i've never had it but it sounds fucking delicious

- request 60/? ooh hey can i get a makeup tutorial? i know you like makeup, i'm shit at doing makeup. teach me

- request 65/? i need the most emo playlist you can make that vibes with dear evan hansen thank you

- request 68/? i want a superwholock moodboard. this can be serious, with the actual fandoms in mind, or literally what the era felt like. the insanity. the horror.

- request 70/? ooh ooh ooh do you have a good bread recipe?? i wanna get that bread

- request 71/? i want a playlist with the vibes of summoning a demon. please don't ask questions. i don't have answers. and if i do, no i don't.

- For the requests, how about writing something based on a friend?

- request 75/? MMMM i want literally anything to do with natasha, pierre, and the great comet of 1812

- request 76/? i want some healthy recipes. help a girl out

- a feral bbb quote or two?

- you perceive my plant but now I dare thee to perceive mine own visage

- okay this is a two for one request. 1. you did the bee movie script so now we need a shrek two script edit 2. sleep please

- Pansexual mb for my lil queer soul?

- my (probably) final request is just for you to ramble about something, i don't really care what

- HI ILY CONGRATS AS WELL CAUSE IM LATE BUT CONGRATS. could i request a pirates of the caribbean (or just pirates) or whatever you what to do, free range.

- mood board for the beluga whales who got brought to the animal sanctuary in Iceland please?

- 100 follower request: Moodboard for my stuffed cow Oaky?

#cai's 200 #asks #mininacl

[notesofarichlycolorednight]

it’s taken me a while but here we are!! listened to bloodwater ballad [TUMBLR | SOUNDCLOUD] by @gerrydelano so I’m gonna dive (ha, dive, get it?) into some analysis even tho I haven’t taken a proper English class since AP English Lit in high school and the god complex it gave me has never left (RIP to everyone else, but I’m different). But I do have a degree in Psychology and am a Researcher, so I know how to dissect things (this is probably why the god complex never left lmao)

disclaimer: I have only listened to TMA through one (1), read it ONE time, so if you read something that seems wrong it probably is because my memory is not The Best (the seasons are 40 eps long and 30 mins each, Jonny why) and I’m probably straight-up not remembering or misremembering some aspect or detail about either a character and/or their relationship

(and before you say it, i absolutely CANNOT just go relisten to an ep out of order. my nd brain Will Not Let Me until i have listened thru all 4 seasons, In Order, several times)

ALSO: i speak very definitively here, but it doesn’t mean i’m right abt my analysis

bold and italics are lyrics, regular font is analysis. if there’s a more accessible way to format this, lmk!

analysis under cut

honesty that's what she gave to me mary didn’t hide who she was; eric knew exactly what he was getting himself into

into the water i bleed into the sea sea motif/metaphor to describe how eric viewed his relationship with mary

truthfully even when she lied through her teeth it only meant she trusted me to lay at her feet rationalization from eric: he knows she’s lying, and she probably knows he knows. but she also knows that he won’t do anything about it

oh, heave-ho it's over the edge i sink more of the sea metaphor in pieces in ribbons in tatters i'm thrown into the dark of the drink ribbons and tatters: reminiscent/hint of mary needing a piece of his skint to keep his ghost in the leitner

oh, heave-ho it's over the edge i go blow the man down, he's a jewel for your crown (blow me down) and no one will ever know ”jewel for your crown”: suggestive of how mary used eric like an object. jewel and crown suggests that he was useful to her in an important way, tho, still an object ”no one will ever know”: suggestive that no one else, looking in on their relationship, would even see it for what it truly was, nor would they ever expect mary to throw him away so casually like she did

war, you see is somewhere you go just to bleed the end of a book you can’t read (books you cannot read) a legacy’s greed “book you can’t read”: suggestive of mary’s relationship with leitners ”a legacy’s greed”: commentary of leitner; bc this is eric telling his story tho, this could also be about how mary pulled eric into her plots regarding leitners, and then gerry

distantly, familiar hope came to me that even with blood in our teeth my son stayed asleep ”even with blood in our teeth”: eric knows what role he had to play in all this and is not absolving himself of blame ”my son stayed asleep”: often sleeping can be used as a metaphor for ignorance. in this case, eric is hoping that, despite what gerry’s mother is and what eric has been complicit in, will not affect his son i think it’s interesting to note here that the backup voices cut out for “my son stayed asleep” (put a pin in it)

oh, heave-ho the ship is my body, i gave to my wife as the captain, the whip, and the brine, the shark lurking under the waves more of the sea metaphor; also a metaphor for how complicit eric was to mary’s will i think it’s super interesting that she’s the captain, whip, brine, and shark in this metaphor. all things that can hurt eric, as the ship. suggests that mary is in complete control of eric (as the captain). also adds to the notion that eric knew exactly who mary was and still loved her anyway (”i gave”).

oh, heave-ho the ship is my body, she cracks the mast of my spine, spills my blood as her wine (lightning strikes and) i really like this line bc it makes me think of the marriage lines in corpse bride: “your cup will never empty, for i will be your wine.” and i love that it’s turned on its head here. cuts a flag from the skin off my back (takes all the skin off my back) a direct callback to the fact that mary has to take strips of eric’s skin to keep his ghost in the leitner book, while also staying with the metaphor that eric is a ship out at sea

way, ay, i wanted to say though blinded i still saw the light at the end of the hall, in a crib with his eyes almost grayer than mine in the night direct callback to eric blinding himself, twice! also represents how much he loves his son: “light of my life” is a common saying and gerry was that for eric

i gave up the sight of his face for his life and i would have lost more for the same i'd cut out my heart to save his from her bite and i almost don't know who to blame again, direct callback to him blinding himself so he could escape the institute a demonstration of how much love he holds for his son, willing to give up more and more of himself if it meant keeping his son safe heart motif! both for eric and gerry i really like the last line here bc he’s saying he doesn’t know who to blame for his blindness (aka cutting out his heart): himself or mary. bc, as i’ve stated before, eric knows who mary is. and he still loves her. still had a child with her. i also think it’s foreshadowing. and the reason i say this is bc, in the end, eric was unable to save gerry from mary. this song is representative of his statement to gertrude, so at this point, he’s a ghost. tho he may not know exactly what mary has done, he knows who she is enough to know that after he died, mary would raise gerry in her likeness, with her ideals

is it a murder if i made my bed by her side when i knew what she was? and here we have eric, most nearly explicitly, stating that he knew mary’s true colors. and loved her anyway. perhaps i'm complicit; i fell asleep first in the bloodcutting comfort of jaws this also solidifies his stance that he should shoulder some of the blame for allowing himself to love her when he knew what a truly terrible and deadly (literally) person she was ”bloodcutting comfort of jaws” is also really nice alliteration

forgive me, forgive me, i did try to swim with my hands and feet bound to my heart heart motif! okay so this one has so many layers for me: so, for all intents and purposes here, eric has effectively cut out his heart, which his hands and feet are bound to, and is now in the jaws of a shark (mary), who is dragging him down to kill him. he tried to save his son by getting away from the institute by blinding himself but it didn’t work weighted and anchored with love for my son who by birthright deserves more than scars legit, this confused me for a bit bc i always saw “with my hands and feet bound to my heart” as the anchor that pulled him down, as you’d weigh someone down with big rocks if you wanted them to drown. however, in the context of tma, i realized anchor could also mean the way martin is jon’s anchor. eric’s love for gerry was his reason--the person who he kept fighting for as best he could

additional note: these 4 verses are all sung without backup voices. i think it’s interesting that the lyrics/verses that revolve around wanting to save his son, and that are about his son, are sung with his singular voice. i wish i could articulate more what that means, but despite my best efforts, i’m not musically inclined even tho i’ll kinda be talking abt music composition for firesorrow girl lmao. link at the end

my eulogy the carpet red under my feet like standing on top of the sea (standing on the sea) the frenzy beneath don’t ask me why but i really like how this last part of the song starts with “my eulogy” bc you can tell the song is coming to a close now by that lyric. what’s really nice is i can “picture” eric closing his statement with gertrude with the request that she finds his son more sea and shark metaphors

infamy how do you remember me? that fool just so desperate to leave that he couldn't see? i also really loved these lines bc eric most likely knows how gertrude thought of him, and can probably sense how she feels of him now, after his story then i love how “couldn’t see” has a double-meaning here: 1) of course, he blinded himself but, 2) that he was also metaphorically blind to what kind of consequences his actions had, both on him and his son

oh, heave-ho a dead man has only one tale listen,,, i know i keep saying this, but i love how ron turns turn-of-phrases on their heads. bc “dead men tell no tales” right? eric has one tale, tho: his statement bc he’s a ghost who’s been bound this book and kept, for all intents and purpose, alive i knew she had hunger for blood in the water and that means it was no betrayal again, confirmation that eric knows that he has to shoulder some of the blame for the consequences of knowing who mary was (this bloodthirsty shark) and still loving her anyway

oh, heave-ho though, i have one request of you now if my son can be found and his own hands unbound (find my son) cut the rope - don't you dare let him drown (don’t you dare be the reason he drowns) so a throwback to “hands and feet bound to my heart” tho perhaps gerry’s heart isn’t what’s dragging him down, necessarily bc he was raised by mary, he didn’t have a choice. the moment he was born, he was tied to her. and the moment mary killed eric, there was no chance he could get away and then, of course, the gut-puncher: “don’t you dare let him drown”/“don’t your dare be the reason he drowns” are especially poignant, given gertrude uses gerry much in the same way mary did. gerry becomes bound to a different entity and is used for gertrude’s gain. so he drowns anyway.

--

alkjdlf i hope this is semi-coherent. i tried to do it more “professionally”--i even thought abt breaking it up and putting it back together, out of order, to address all the themes and motifs all in one spot--but then decided what would be best for my brain, was to listen to the song and just add my thoughts in as they came, stream of consciousness style *finger guns*

firesorrow girl analysis | meme i made for these analyses bc it’s funny and i wanted to share

#tma #the magnus archives #tma meta #(kinda. alkjldkf idk how to tag thissss) #eric delano #mary keay #gerard keay #chirp.meta

[scholarhect]

2 3 15 babey

HI BRO ILY

2. what’s your taco bell order

crunchwrap supreme. maybe a burrito, idk. i had a bean burrito today but i thought it was gross. plus the red freezy thing (starburst flavored, i think). except today i had baja blast and it was pretty good

i want you to know that this question is the entire reason i made this post. this was the germ, the mustard seed. “ask game: what’s your taco bell order”. and the rest was history

3. tell me about that one thing you wish someone would ask you about

(spoilers for tma if anybody’s gonna listen someday, i guess. literally major spoilers for seasons 1-4. turns out i don’t know how to shut up. thanks for indulging me)

okay. okay i’m gonna talk to you specifically. listen to me, i am talking directly into your ear now. i wish for the opportunity to tell you about ms melanie king. you’ve already heard about her as the inspiration for my haircut and also my fishnet outfit from that time i dragged you to that thrift thing, but she is such an icon. first of all she’s a YOUTUBER. (not like a vlogger, i guess, she hosts a show on youtube. but a youtuber nonetheless.) she hunts GHOSTS. on YOUTUBE. so, she shows up at The Magnus Institute, London, to tell them about that time she saw a ghost (but it was like ... a weird ghost. not a normal ghost. you know). immediately she insults the guy’s shitty old tape recorder that she is expected to speak into, in the year 2016. so they get snippy with each other and end up in a full-blown “The Girls Are Fightinggg” passive aggressive argument because they both view each other as pathetic, fake, not-respectable paranormal investigators. (and they both have A Thing about being respected & taken seriously.) like it turns out that the institute has a fucking laughable reputation in The Academic Community because they’ll just take a statement from anybody about their supposed supernatural experience. meanwhile jon thinks the people on ghost hunt shows are charlatans because their goal is entertainment and, yes, they “do ham it up a bit for the cameras.” ANYWAY. she’s all dragging the magnus institute and he’s like. “but you’re here.” it’s very funny. turns out she can’t tell the Serious Academic Community about her experience because it’s so wild that they’d laugh her out of her career. so she’s here. so she’s got no choice but to tell her story. so the episode continues, and ends, okay, and you’re like, “wow that was a fun and iconic one-off character. right?” WRONG.

season two... she’s BACK baby! after her experience at the military hospital, she wants to do research on War Ghosts, but the magnus institute wouldn’t let her in bc she didn’t have the Academic Clout for it, so the only way is to get an employee to vouch for her. so. she goes to jon like “please you’re the only friend i have here i need help” and they DO fight again but he does agree to help her (because they’re the same person. they are *spiderman pointing meme*). so, later, she’s back. she did some research on War Ghosts and broke into an old train graveyard (which is a thing apparently) and got stabbed by the ghost of an army medic and she got caught and arrested and she was screaming about how She Got Stabbed By A Ghost and somebody took a video and posted it online and then she BECAME A MEME for a couple days and nobody wanted to associate with her anymore. rip. but now she likes jon and she’s here to say goodbye (because she’s going to india) (she also sets off the climax of the season because she just happens to be that one person who can see that the monster pretending to be a major character is not, in fact, that character. she’s like “oh, which sasha? the new one? or the old one?” and jon’s like “what the fuck” and she’s like “there’s definitely two sashas. are you trying to gaslight me.” but whatever)

ok this is literally less than half her arc (i’ve covered. three episodes.) but this is long as fuck so i’ll wrap it up. “what a cool reoccurring character,” you may think! “i hope i get to see more of her!” well GUESS WHAT. she comes back from india (she’s been SHOT BY A GHOST) she wants to talk to jon but he’s not there (he was unfortunately in very close proximity to a murder and he’s on the run so he doesn’t get framed. double traumatic experience, very fun. anyway he’s staying at melanie’s friend’s house, whom she has conveniently namedropped a couple times so far (in the last episode she was like “she actually has nice things to say about you, why didn’t you tell me you knew her” and he’s like “we didn’t part on the best of terms”) because she is his ex-girlfriend, so, though he literally was just pretending that he didn’t know her, he now knows that she doesn’t hate him so he shows up at her place and she hides him from the cops because she’s literally the only person he knows outside work. but this isn’t about him.) so melanie has no job so elias is like “you want a job” and she’s like “sure?” so now she’s an archival assistant at the magnus institute (i realized i had to explain that. i don’t think you even know who elias is. head of the institute, everybody’s secretly evil boss, currently lowkey framing jon for the murder he committed. but lowkey) her coworkers don’t want her there because they’ve realized that their job is evil and they Physically Cannot Quit so they’re like “great now she’s stuck here too” but she doesn’t know that so she’s just like “why does everybody hate me. are you misogynists” because her Disrespect Alarm is going off in her head. and then they have a Department Meeting where jon comes back with an open knife wound on his neck and demands elias tell everyone about the TWO murders and then there’s a standoff situation where somebody wants to shoot elias but he’s “knife cat”ing at her and very dramatically forces her codependent friend slash partner (in the cop way not the gay way) to sign a contract as an archival assistant so that daisy (the cop with the gun) can’t hurt elias because, oh yeah, if he dies supposedly they all do too. so melanie is ... thoroughly disillusioned. and she becomes sullen, too, kind of. and she begins to try to murder elias. queen

things get worse (in a supernatural way. she gets Angry Knife Powers. there’s a Ghost Bullet from India lodged in her leg pumping murderous energy through her body and while she’s asleep jon removes it, it’s all very terrible.) but then she starts going to therapy because she wants to get better and she ends up making the difficult journey to Being Okay. (she also literally blinds herself to escape the institute, and that doesn’t really sound analogous to therapy out of context but it is, okay) and her arc is over and she’s the only character in the story who is currently Okay. we’re proud of her. her last appearance (so far. who knows what s5 has in store. hopefully not much) jon, who is in some deeeeep shit by this point, shows up asking for help, and she’s like “i can’t help you bc i can’t get dragged back into all that, but you’re always welcome in my life as a friend” which is not great for him at that point because he is kind of having a breakdown, but it’s still <3. much better than the beginning part of s4 when she wanted to kill him on sight. also she’s dating jon’s ex now lol

15. if somebody irl you didn’t know asked you how you feel about mcr what would you say (this question isn’t quite asking you how you feel about mcr, but it’s not not asking that)

i’d be like “yeah they’re pretty cool. i like them”

#ask #i am so fucking sorry. #i wrote this at 12-2 am last night. in case that wasnt obvious

[ghosty-schnibibit]

I posted 211 times in 2021

33 posts created (16%)

178 posts reblogged (84%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 5.4 posts.

I added 233 tags in 2021

#happy halloween! - 155 posts

#(part two bc i had too much stuff queued!) - 49 posts

#the magnus archives - 5 posts

#tma - 5 posts

#nightmare before christmas - 4 posts

#pokemon - 4 posts

#over the garden wall - 3 posts

#otgw - 3 posts

#never mind me - 3 posts

#ut - 2 posts

Longest Tag: 134 characters

#i'm waiting to see what happens but my bet is post+ gets discontinued within the month but not before someone's debit info gets stolen

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

i am not going outside again until all the bugs are dead, i have twenty fucking mosquito bites and they all itch

7 notes • Posted 2021-09-06 17:27:05 GMT

#4

me an hour ago: okay i’ve had welcome to the internet stuck in my head for the past week, i should just listen to the whole album and see what the fuss is about and if it’s really as affecting as everyone says

me now, listening to look who’s inside again on repeat and balling my eyes out: this was a MISTAKE

11 notes • Posted 2021-06-30 06:45:15 GMT

#3

hi!! I’m not really sure what the elevator thing is about? could I ask what it means? :o thank u!

i'm gonna try to answer this to the best of my ability and under the assumption that you haven't listened to taz and/or read the graphic novel adaptations, apologies if you have

in the first campaign of the dnd podcast "the adventure zone," it became a bit of a running joke that griffin (the dm) kept putting elevators in the podcast's dnd fantasy setting. at the time griffin was also pretty well known for making jokes about vore (basically people being swallowed whole, google at your own risk, it is usually discussed in a very NSFW context).

during the crystal kingdom arc, both of these running jokes combined into the character upsy, basically a talking elevator that refers to taking on passengers as them getting in his "belly" and whose insides are described as fleshy and slimy. the most information we get about how uspy came to be is that, apparently, when elevators were still a new invention in the world of the podcast's setting, uspy was created as a mascot character to help popularize them.

a much more significant plot point that's also introduced during the crystal kingdom arc is that the ghosts of people who've died can be pulled from the afterlife and stored in cores (which are described as looking like fuses) that can operate robotic bodies. it's notable that the scientist who discovered this process is a part of the family responsible for creating all the elevators in this world, and presumably one of his predecessors built upsy.

in the podcast it goes unexplained why upsy is so weird and creepy other than griffin likes a) elevators and b) vore jokes, hence "vore elevator," and it kind of went assumed that, in-universe, uspy was just programmed or designed to be Like That.

but in one of the last pages of the graphic novel adaptation, upsy makes a final appearance... with what appears to be one of the ghost-holding fuses installed in his base. thus implying that the "haha funny goof elevator vore joke" is controlled by the ghost of a dead person, which is a whole new level of horrible to think about.

tl:dr, the graphic novel adaptation of crystal kingdom made a vaguely disturbing joke character even more disturbing by implying that he used to be a real person who died and was brought back to life as a fleshy abomination of an elevator that jokes about eating people alive.

i hope that explains things anon, feel free to ask again for clarification if it doesn't

13 notes • Posted 2021-07-16 18:59:21 GMT

#2

i’m screaming this is the third night in the span of two weeks that i’ve gone downstairs and found a spider the size of a nickel by the corner of the baseboard, what the actual fuck

17 notes • Posted 2021-05-24 03:25:42 GMT

#1

i have some thoughts about the crystal kingdom gn that i will share in the morning when i’m less tired but this one tiny detail was haunting me and my brain would not let me sleep until i converted it into this

794 notes • Posted 2021-07-14 06:08:50 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

#my 2021 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #y'all i'm fucking crying of course the vore elevator post i made in under a minute on mspaint is my top post #at least the explanation i typed out for that poor confused anon is on this too so no one has to face it w/o context

[radiosandrecordings]

I wrote a big long post, and I’m not quite sure what my point is and also it’s 2am so by the end it’s pretty much nonsensical but I just wanted to get some feelings out in words, it’s more of a For Me thing really but idk, someone else might feel similar so: 

Been thinking about Stuff recently and as I am want to do with every thought that rattles through my hollow little head, I’ve tried sifting it through a jmart lens. This originally came from a discussion I was having yesterday about how the fan base has changed a lot since jmart became canon, especially in terms of new people listening. But it was more in the context of it... I think there’s a tendency when people listen, specifically ones who came because they’ve seen fan art or they heard ‘omg canon gays!’ (It’s really becoming the new Night Vale and I have Thoughts on that but that’s for a separate post) to listen through the show as a means to get to them being ‘a canon couple’. 

And I suppose there’s a route I could go down here where I talk about how that’s kinda derisive to the show to treat this whole complex story as only a vehicle to get you to the concept of boys kissing, but to me it’s more like... I mean ‘fandoms’ as they are now, really do have a tendency to put an emphasis on romance as the main thing to be focused on, even in media where it isn’t found, that’s old hat. But I Don’t Like That. I mean, obviously I love romance stuff, I read as many fluffy jmart fics with 0 bearing on canon as the next person, I’ve been writing those since season 3 when we had no idea this was coming, when it was still ‘the dinghy’ to a lot of people.

But the whole kind of overview of it is reductive not just to the show but to other forms of relationships I think? Again this isn’t TMA exclusive, this is a common thing, I’m just filtering through one specific thing here. One of my favourite quotes from Jonny was from the S4 Q&A, when he was explaining why Daisy and Basira aren’t a romantic couple, which is a whole OTHER thing and people’s ignoring of his whole logic for that has made me kind of prickly against the ship now, but that’s another topic. Anyway, he says “So, with each relationship within the series there is a specific thing that I’m trying to explore. A specific dynamic that I feel is- is the core of the relationship in something that I am really interested in exploring.” And I adore seeing TMA through this lens. With each character Jon meets, trying to figure out what it is that their specific dynamic with him is supposed to convey. How the whole show is about how people interact with each other and that’s why to me when you boil Jon down to his only relationship being his romantic one is just feels off. 

Like I adore jmart, I truly do, and I get why they’re the most common. Romance is easy and fun to write about, and they’re the two main characters, they’re the ones we lock onto because we spend so much time with them. But if you sat me down and told me to make a list of my favourite dynamics in TMA, personally I would have them ranked third. I would rather talk about Jon and Georgie all day firstly, and then after that Jon and Gerry. Maybe there’s not as much to say for those two dynamics as their is for jmart due to the sheer amount of jmart interaction and content we have in canon, but I think the dynamics that are being explored there are more appealing to me personally to look at. 

Another thing is this notion that relationships only really start when they’re agreed upon to be a reciprocated romantic partnership, and I think that’s something often missed when people rush forward to get to S5 and see them act all coupley. This idea that their interactions only matter if they’re in service to a ship. I don’t think people ignore them interacting before that, but more that people have a tendency to hone in on the parts they think they can point at and go ‘See, see, that’s where he has a crush on him!’. As if their dynamic wasn’t interesting in itself before it became romantic, and only holds worth once they have feelings for each other in a romantic manner rather than simply caring about each other, or even how they might not care at the start. Like, if you are friends with someone for five years, and then get a crush on them for one year, and then start dating, you have had a relationship with this person for six years but the one year of your feelings being romantic doesn’t change the five years to be un-platonic, you were just friends then even if feelings came later. 

Side note -  Obviously the romance gives it obvious appeal and reason for acclaim because if you come to TMA from out of an audio drama sphere, you are likely starving for healthy gay content and so of course you want to focus on that bit of rep. But there’s better media for that, audio is full of it, just because TMA is the popular show doesn’t mean it’s what you’re looking for if you genuinely don’t like horror or the story it’s telling and are only there for the romance. You can shop around a bit until you find the story you want, I promise you it’s out there if you go looking.

Back from the side note - I think what I mean to say is. This is probably me venting my frustration at allonormativity a little in pushing romance as The Superior Dynamic and all other relationships a character has as side notes. Though obviously there’s the caveat that Martin is Jon’s most important relationship to him, hell he called him his reason! But maybe I’m just a little frustrated at their romance being treated as a crux of the show instead of one important thread in a whole woven tapestry of themes and relationships. Again this isn’t dunking on anyone for making fluffy content because I will be sitting here gobbling that up, it’s just more of a... Vent at the way relationships are viewed in general? A bit of a “Funny, you criticise the prioritising of romantic relationships over all other kinds but yet you partake in the writing of non-relevant fluff fics!” I know, but there’s absolutely a place for them because they’re Good I think I just feel like they shouldn’t be the overwhelm if that makes sense? Even some of the stuff I’ve said here now that I look back doesn’t even really apply to jmart specifically so it’s more just. throwing my thoughts at a wall and using jmart to understand some of it I guess. 

#My Post #I am unsure what im saying really. i need sleep perhaps #when i read this tomorrow it'll be NONSENSE wont it

[dathen]

TMA 166 Liveblog Dump

I finally got through an episode without my twitter getting locked for spam good for me

OH GOOD THEY'RE GONNA TALK ABOUT THE THING

Domain of the Buried oh I was not expecting that

"look down" and then helen shows up IS SHE PUTTING HER DOORS ON THE FLOOR..

I wish Martin had wanted to talk about the Implications of Jon killing vs. the "how"....like...does the "how" matter..?  everything is fairy tale logic

Helen trying to put Jon at the same level as Elias for having a difficult time describing stuff >:|  fucking helen

oooh this is GOOD LORE though Helen describing herself as a manifestation on par with the Not!Sasha is EXACTLY what my theory was (vs. a Helen-the-person becoming a formerly-person avatar)

Jon being able to shift someone from being The Feared to The Afraid [eye emojis] I am dying for this to happen to Jonah I am DYING

"I don't see why you were being so coy about it--" "Because I'm ashamed, Martin!"  Jonnnnn ;;;A;;; Also said in the EXACT same delivery as "because I'm afraid, Martin!"

hhhh this Martin characterization is exactly what I felt was the context of the end of 165; he's so used to being in a position of powerlessness and having to play these dangerous games to stay safe, power is EXCITING

it's weird to hear the words "go full Kill Bill" and "get our murder" on coming from his mouth, but the idea of him supporting Jon in avenging himself on those who hurt him and killing the torturers of the new world is..not as surprising to me as it could be

(I hate that this conversation is happening in front of Helen though.  Helen is the one of the worst influences I could come up with for either of them right now, and I genuinely expect some level of spying/sabotage from that direction if they're too open)

[presses face to glass]  Martin honey you've been doing great with relationship stuff so far and this is probably your first one but you might have not learned the "have delicate arguments in privacy and security with boundaries vs in front of a Monster Jury" bittttt

I think Martin realized he fucked up a bit, his voice gets so soft asking if Jon needs anything after Helen leaves ._. 

I can't get over Jon's ramble about why he's ashamed that he still blames himself for this, and hates that he has less pain and more freedom than those he considers more innocent, and even hates that he has the power to defend himself now. I'm SO SAD but I love him so much

once again I get where both of them are coming from; Jon feels it's WRONG that he's not suffering and can kill things that try to hurt him or Martin while Martin sees Jon as a victim regaining agency Jon is back to being eight years old and blaming himself for escaping Mr Spider

oh man oh man this buried statement coming after Jon's confession of shame and guilt  "He never knew something that could be called freedom, even if he had choice" That sums up so much for these characters from the moment they started working in the Archive

"while his feet could turn left, only turning right let him scrape out a meager living"  I REALLY love the explorations of the tyranny of poverty this season; with the show as a whole working as an effective metaphor for capitalism, it makes me wonder what the ending message is

this statement is a jon metaphor all the way through  "If it moves like a worm and thinks like a worm.." for the self-dehumanization of the victim compare to "if it lives like a monster and feeds like a monster" for him

(I'm having a little ADHD trouble following statements this season--I think it's because they're less of a personal story format)

"forces of paper and ink and decimal points" go OFF

hhhhh this also feels like a parallel to how Jon feels about the very journey they're taking if even THAT is the pinprick of light at the surface Martin's hope of fixing the world?  does Jon even have that tiny spark of hope?

me:  for this statement to really parallel how the characters in the show are trapped, it would have to include something about how they turned on each other when they couldn't escape statement:  [does exactly that] me:  surprisedpikachu.jpg

Jon's "god, I hate the Buried" and struggling to catch his breath after... .________.   retraumatizing himself over his own stay in the coffin....  I'm so SAD

Martin:  Man I wish I had some magazines Martin:  *imagines Leitner magazine*  ACTUALLY NEVERMIND

ohh I do NOT like Martin seeing a spade and then giving in to using it I do NOT LIKE THAT AT ALL where is my boy who refused to pick up the telephone

LKSJDFLSJF I KNEW THAT WHEN WE HEARD FROM ANNABELLE THE VOICE WOULD BE UNDERWHELMING  listen it's impossible to top "Jon reading a woman's statement" voice that is just maximum appeal to me it doesn't get sexier than that

I am seething this entire conversation but Martin starting out with refusal and telling her to stop calling him is giving me my scraps of validation against the "Martin's been working for the Web the whole time" idea

"does he even need you at all" Annabelle........is that really the angle you're gonna try............are you kidding me.......

okay what is Annabelle's angle here at all Trying to convince him that Jon doesn't need him...and she does? Offering him help...to do what? She's obviously trying to hit some nerves or pull some strings but it felt very hamfisted fhhsdfh

I'm going to make Martin hanging up on Annabelle and telling her to never contact him again my ringtone

*adds Telephone by Lady Gaga to my TMA playlist*   it's a Martin song

#tma #the magnus archives #tma spoilers #tma liveblog #TMA 166 The Worms

[dathen]

I’m so angry that tumblr put my read more WITHIN THE ASK ITSELF so I’m copying the whole post since I worked hard on it:

Ask from @ blue-electric-angel

Hi Dath! Would you feel up to rant about the trolley problem? I've never liked it but I don't know WHY or at least can't articulate it, so I would be interested in hearing another person's thoughts 🤔 But it's okay if you don't want to!!

OKAY TWO DISCLAIMERS

a) I was reminded that I should clarify my dislike of the trolley problem bc of @callmearcturus talking about its issues, so can’t take full credit here!

b) I am not a philosophy expert and find ethical thought games only useful in how they apply to the real world, and find worth in ethical discussions in how they’re applied/affect how people think more than how complex/challenging they are.

THIRD DISCLAIMER I’m very sleepy and pretty sure I have surpassed my words quota of the week so this may be a bit disjointed!!

Some background on my ire:  I’m a CPA.  Which means majoring in business.  Which means being around business majors.  Which means BUSINESS ETHICS CLASSES.  My eyes start to water every time I think about how many American Dream dudebros tried to apply the trolley problem as a flimsy excuse to devalue those they thought were reasonable sacrifices for their own greater good.  Is it worth testing weapons on your own population, if you can then use those weapons to end a war faster?  Should we get rid of regulations about medical tests on people, if it would result in life-saving medicine being produced faster?  And so on.  Rules, protections, and just anything that would require giving another human being agency are treated like nuisances in the way of Great Minds moving and shaping the world as they see fit.  

I went and did a search to see if anyone already put my thoughts about the trolley problem into words, and the article The Trolley Problem Will Tell you Nothing Useful About Morality sums it up right from the get-go:

It discourages us from examining the structural factors that determine our choices.

[cut for length]

One thing that drove me BATSHIT about philosophy classes is I was never allowed to bring historical or social context into any of the discussions.  I couldn’t challenge Aristotle’s view of women as ranking somewhere near livestock, because if I couldn’t word puzzle my way into a truth, nonsense like “disenfranchisement of women in Ancient Greece” and “self-perpetuating social structures enforcing class and gender divides” didn’t belong in my discussions, apparently!  

Which, needless to say, is a huge issue when you start getting into topics of “who should we sacrifice for the greater good” as applied to political policy.  I don’t even need to elaborate on this one.  It’s always those whose lives are valued less and who have less power in that society.  The “greater good” is intensely subjective, and will always include the well-being of the person making the choice.  

The trolley problem works from a long list of assumptions that will rarely reflect reality, and shortcut past the most important discussions to be had:

- The person behind the switch has the sole power or responsibility for making the choice.  They don’t have the chance to communicate, they don’t have the chance to get input from the people in danger.  

- The person behind the switch is the only one with agency, and the only one who CAN have agency.

- The safety of the person behind the switch is assumed.  No possible choice could involve them being in danger.

- There’s a time limit that allows nothing more than an impulse decision.

- There’s no examination of why there is only one person with power over the situation, or why those at risk are 100% powerless to leave their situation

- There’s no chance of examining why the trolley is rolling down the tracks in the first place

That last one is where my rage comes from about the misapplication of this thought game re: insisting philosophy must be ahistorical.  But the thing that especially gets under my skin is how the agency of other human beings is just completely taken off the table.  A non-issue.  Something we have to assume wouldn’t make a difference, something we should assume isn’t possible to begin with.

[Stop reading here if you’re avoiding The Magnus Archives spoilers to episode 101]

Since this came up in a TMA context, I’ll veer it over to TMA: I see it get brought up in the context of Gertrude sacrificing Michael to save the world.  But this dehumanizes Michael as a person who could have been given agency and information, when in fact we know he was kept ignorant so that he could be more easily manipulated.  It places Gertrude behind the switch with no other options other than to pull a lever one way or another.  But therein lies the issue with the application of this experiment to “real life” scenarios.  Where is talking to Michael instead of betraying him?  Where is letting him make a choice of his own?  We learn later that his sacrifice wasn’t even necessary, but with the limited information Gertrude had at the time, how much were other options (LIKE GOOD OL C4) explored before she decided to ruin the life of someone who trusted her?  Why does she get to ensure her own safety behind the switch, rather than considering herself in the trade of “one life to save the world”?

TMA 155 - Cost of Living is a fantastic deconstruction of how rich and privileged people try to apply the trolley problem to excuse their choices and their abuse of others.  The statement giver rationalizes murdering dozens of people to fuel her own life, excusing it with “but I can do so much good if I’m alive!”  Meanwhile we’re left horrified that she clearly finds those she postures as being so helpful towards as expendable and “less valuable to society,” such as homeless people and the elderly.  We’re left side-eying the idea that a rich person giving to charity while living comfortably as being an indisputable “greater good” when all that’s really happening is one person valuing her own life over the lives of so many others.  The statement giver insists the net gain of the world excuses her actions, and tries to narrow the choice down to those two tracks:  Don’t pull the switch and lose “all the good she could do,” pull the switch and lose just a handful of people.  Listening, we know that the only person on the other track is her, and that her rationalization only enables her to kill again and again.

And that is why I hate the trolley problem.  

#there are spoilers for TMA 100 in here but I mark where they start #so if you're not interested in TMA or catching up you can read the rest of me hating on the trolley problem