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pennswoodsman · 3 years

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I’m at the Acme on Passyunk ave with my dad. I’m really struggling to keep my head up lately. I made the mistake of deciding to let my prescription for Zoloft run dry to see if I still need it. Clearly I do. This last week on several occasions I got triggered with something then fall into a crippling depression for the next few hours, sometimes until the next day.

I got a raise at work for the first time in 4 years. At first I was thrilled. Then I find out it’s because their minimum wage has increased and they had no choice but to raise it. So....I haven’t bothered to tell anyone. It doesn’t feel like a victory. In fact it depressed me knowing that I’m now just making the banks minimum wage, I went from being a supervisor to an aimless loser making shit wages...again.

A few days later I’m at the Amity park for an ice cream social with the boys. This is the first time I’ve been to this park in about 5 years. A sudden rush of memories of being happy with Dawn and socializing with other parents and their kids overcomes me. I find myself again re-living all of Dawn’s lies and the hurtful things she said and did in 2017 and 2018. I realized I was about to have a panic attack right there and then...while I was waiting in line for ice cream with the boys. I was trying so hard to be pleasant and strong for Kevin and Nate, but I felt that god awful nothingness in my chest and that feeling of about to tear up. Plus my teeth were sore from clenching my jaw so much. I drove home feeling exhausted. I felt a little better hanging out with the boys and watching a movie together.

Now it’s Thursday and I have a long shift. I am so depressed I can barely speak above a whisper. Everyone is annoying me. At one point a team member puts me on mute to talk to a customer and I start looking at naked chicks on Reddit. Without thinking about it I mutter to myself “man, that’s an edible vagina” to suddenly realize I said that while on mute, not on hold. I panic and hang up. It’s a recorded line and now I am wondering if it’s only a matter of time before they hear it and fire my ass.

That night, I had a series of nightmares. One was right when I first fell asleep. I was driving the Rogue by myself late at night. It was somewhere in Berks county. I felt really out of it, like I was drugged up on prescription meds or something. I accidentally drove up on the sidewalk and just stopped myself from crashing into a tree. I continued to drive even though I knew I was severely impaired. I was reversing to get back on the road and I ended up driving off the road again, this time going into the woods. My seatbelt was wrapped around my right arm, pinning it against my chest. I was trying to free it with my left hand but it kept slipping out of my fingers. I finally got it out but, right on queue, the car slide down a refine and off a cliff. I calmly watched the car plummeting toward the ground through the windshield. I said “goodbye world” and I knew that was it. I woke up with a jolt as the car was literally about to smash from 200 feet.

A couple of days later I was on Reddit again and a man who was in his 40s was asking a question in “dating over 40”. The man said he doesn’t have a good job, his mother pays his mortgage and grocery bills and is this a deal breaker for the ladies. Not that I was shocked by this, but I don’t recall a single woman saying anything but negative things. Saying why would anyone want a loser? Why would anyone want a man who can’t take care of himself? Etc. I sent him an encouraging message to not listen to them, shit happens and if you have a parent who can afford to help you it shouldn’t be the end of the world. I then suggested to not mention his mother pays his mortgage and other bills until a few months in so that way, she could get the know the “real you” and not pre judge you. Some random woman sent me a reply stating that not telling his dates right away is being manipulative. I honestly don’t agree. Since when do you discuss how you pay your mortgage and bills in the first few months of a relationship? I know I never have and would never ask. I said that and all she said was “look up manipulative in the dictionary”. It made me remember how Dawn claimed I was manipulative without even the seeing the slightest bit of irony in that accusation and it got me spiraling towards another panic attack.

Which brings me to today. I worked my Saturday shift, gathered as many family photos to bring to my dad’s house as my trunk would carry and headed out. I put on the “AskReddit” things to hear about entitled celebrities from the stage hands. Once that story is done it automatically went to “ladies what are examples of a man child?” By the first 5 minutes I was so depressed I could barely lift my head up. I am a fucking man child. My house is filthy, I have a shit job and my father pays my way through life. I have a brand new car which is normally a thing to be proud of but I find myself feeling shame that it wasn’t me who paid for it. I feel massive shame for almost being 46 and still dependent on my father. I feel massive shame for being 46 and still having no real career to speak of. For having this generous GF who deserves such a great man but sometimes I feel like she deserves better than I.

The thing is, it hasn’t even really been a bad week per se. Kristan got us SECOND ROW TICKETS FOR DEAD AND COMPANY!! She loves Jimmy Buffett, which is great because making the leap from Buffett to the Dead really isn’t that big of a change. Plus she has heard Scarlet Begonias live a ton of times and didn’t even realize it was originally a Dead song. Her birthday was last week and I wanted to send her some Scarlet Begonias from a florist. I checked all the websites of the local florists and none of them had any. So, I ordered some faux ones from Target. I also got her Jimmy Buffett tickets this coming August. Mine are only lawn seats though. So, not quite as awesome. I did agree to wear a grass skirt and coconut tits at the show. Hey, when in Rome, right?

Sigh....

#depression #anxious #deep breath

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quell-tea-salon · 7 years

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Yumeiro Cast Dream Show 2017 event report!

In my short time in Japan I’ve attended quite a few concerts and seiyuu events, and this concert is honestly one of the best that I’ve experienced. I know this blog is mostly for QUELL, but I don’t have anywhere else to share this from... Feel free to scroll past if this isn’t for you.

I’ll also be rambling a lot about Hatanaka Tasuku and Hayashi Yuu ;w;

I recall regretting applying for tickets at some point, because having to travel from Kyoto to Tokyo (or rather, Chiba, since the venue was Makuhari Messe) just for the concert was a huge pain, and very expensive. Boy, am I glad I did though. To begin with, getting tickets to ANY popular event is a tough process. You have to enter a draw to have a shot at getting a ticket, and if you miss out on that, you’ll have to buy the tickets when they go on sale later, and they usually sell out in under ten seconds. I’m not kidding. I’ve experienced this pain. On multiple occasions. Anyway, the first draw was opened to players only (the URL link was a banner in the game’s home screen), which is a really nice gesture. I managed to get a ticket in this draw :)

I arrived at the venue about 30 minutes before the show and bypassed the merchandise corner, as the queue looked scary and I didn’t have much time. Jumped in the queue to take a photograph of the standees (pictured above; and yes, there was a queue for this too), which took about 15 minutes, and then rushed over to join a queue for one of the bathrooms (all of them had long queues /pukes blood). I started chatting with a lady in a cute dress in line behind me and found out that we both have Kaito as our fav (plus Subaru for me). She was happy to find another Kaito fan and whipped out a couple of beautifully packaged small prints from her bag and handed them to me *_* Turns out she’s an artists and draws a lot of Kaito!! I was so surprised but flattered and felt bad about not having anything on hand to give her in return... I just gave her the kiwi bird badge from my backpack that I picked up while traveling in New Zealand, sweats...

Minutes till starting time and we were still caught in the queue, though getting very close to the bathroom. We debated giving up and leaving to find our seats so we wouldn’t miss the opening act, but decided to stay since having to leave halfway through the show for the bathroom would be worse. A few minutes later we heard screams coming from the arena and thought that the show had started, but the girl behind us assured us that they were just playing some promotional videos on the big screen and that nothing was happening on stage. We passed the message on to the group of girls in front of us as we heard them fretting about the same thing. Community spirit!

I parted ways with my new friend after leaving the bathroom and went to find my seat; inside the arena the lights had already been dimmed and clearly something was about to start. I was still stumbling around in the dark when all seven members of Yumeiro Company burst onto stage to the tune of CALL HEAVEN!! and by the time I found my spot they were probably halfway through the song;;;;

My seat was on the third floor, but quite close to the left side of the stage, so in a way it was a good spot as I could just barely make out the faces of the performers standing on my side of the stage. Their formation, from right to left: Subaru, Kaito, Sousei, Kyouya, Hinata, Iori, and Jin. I was still shaky from scrambling to find my seat and honestly don’t remember much, but I know that they were all dressed sharply in formal suits, and that the chorus had a dance routine that was fun and cheerful, fitting of a musical show. As we all know, the cast of YumeCast has a lot of strong singers, so I could relax and appreciate the vocals. I managed to find my pen light too and was ready to finally join the party :3

After the opening act I thought they would break for an introductory talk, but they launched straight into the next song. Everyone except Kyoya left the stage as the intro for Kyoya’s solo, Kimi ni Chikatta Monogatari started playing, and we all scrambled to change our pen lights to pink. Tbh I think Ohsaka Ryota’s one of the less experienced singers in the group, but I was pleasantly surprised by his solid performance. He definitely leveled up a lot since the start of YumeCast, and each of his graceful, princely gestures was very much Kyoya.

Hinata jumped onto stage next to perform Glass no Shoes ha Niawanai (I should mention that these solos were game-sized length and played back to back like a medley). We all melted at how cute he was, and he even slipped in a few lines directed at “oneesan! ;)” *Audience screams and dies* Uemura Yuuto’s usually a good singer but he went off-pitch a few times, probably due to nerves...

Iori was next with Tsumetai Yozora wo Terasu no ha. This is the third time I’ve seen Hanae Natsuki live, and you can tell he’s a seasoned performer by how comfortable he is on stage, and how his vocals are always clear and steady. His lines as Iori made a lot of people in the audience scream, but honestly whenever I see Hanae his joker character is all I register and I couldn’t really appreciate Iori LOL.

Kaito appeared on stage, rocking along to PASSION LASER BEAM, and this is where I died. Hayashi Yuu is phenomenal to watch live, he’s arguably one of the best singers of the group and is amazing at working the crowd, which isn’t surprising considering he’s the vocalist of Screen Mode. Hayashu brought a living, breathing Kaito onto stage in all his haughty glory T_____T It’s my dream to one day catch Screen Mode live as well...

Jin’s Kokoro no (ry was up next. I have to admit that I’m not a fan of Jin’s singing, I think it forces Ono Yuuki to fake a lower register which stifles his singing and it sounds unnatural, which is a shame when Onoyuu has such a lovely smooth voice. Onoyuu kept his fooling around to a minimum at this point, but he couldn’t stop his sunny trademark grin ww

SUBARU! WITH BACKDANCERS!!! Performing You & Me... de, Wave!!! If I had to pick a fav moment in the show, this would be it. Hatanaka Tasuku is SUCH a skilled singer, there’s so much energy in his voice, and his solo even included an intense dance routine which was amazing to watch. This is my fav solo charasong from YumeCast and Subaru completely smashed it... I’m buying the DVD later so I can watch it again ;____; I was so blown-away by the performance that I didn’t even notice what he was wearing >< I also noticed that one of the security staff near my block, who, up till then, was doing a good job of checking on the audience, couldn’t help but look at the stage once Subaru started singing. He watched up till the 2nd chorus lol before turning back to his job.

[OOT: This is my second time meeting Tasuku and each time I see him I feel like a proud mother watching her son grow by leaps and bounds >< The first time I met him was at the 5th fan meeting for Nariyuki Night, hosted by Tasuku and Yonaga Tsubasa. It was a small, cosy event of maybe 200 people, and it blew my mind that we got to see them at such a close distance. The coolest part was that they implemented a bunch of interactive activities to get the audience involved, one of which was a game where they had to guess an item based on clues shown on screen and borrow it from the audience.... Which meant that they had to run up and down the aisles of the seats, and at one point Yonaga grabbed a girl’s hand and escorted her down to the stage *_* Tasuku came by my seat and stopped to think about clues, so I literally had him standing next to me for like half a minute ahjghadllkjad. Also they were dressed in school uniform as one of the many suggestions for the “summer theme”; Yonaga in a beige vest, short sleeves, and colourful hairclips in his hair (he really looked like Nagisa from Free!), and Tasuku with a loose red tie and long shirt sleeves rolled up to his elbows. Cute af. Prior to that I’d only seen Tasuku on livestreams and heard him on radio, and I’m glad to report that he’s every bit as earnest and clumsy in person as he is on air, like an awkward oversized puppy still learning how to walk but excited for someone to throw him a ball ;w;]

The last solo was Sousei’s Dare mo ga Ashi(ry. I was looking forward to this as I’ve been a fan of Toyonaga Toshiyuki since his Tenimyu days, and I love his singing voice. He wasn’t as smooth as in the recorded version, but still a delight to hear live.

Without giving us time to catch our breath, the show moved on to the next song. Hinata appeared on stage in a dark suit and a cape, accompanied by dancers dressed in ghoulish outfits. It was Mysterious Mission! This was a super fun song with a cute zombie dance, and at one point Hinata was hoisted up onto the shoulders of the backdancers in a sort of ALL HAIL YOUR CUTE MONSTER LORD routine. An oh, all the songs from this point on were performed in full :3

Next, Subaru and Jin appeared in santa outfits for Holy Melody Night. This is probably one of my least favourite songs in YumeCast, imo it’s the wrong key for both singers and doesn’t really showcase their voices. They were both so cute on stage though! Running from one end of the stage to the other and waving at us with huge smiles. The concert hall was enveloped in a warm, sparkly atmosphere ;w;

Next was the moment I had been waiting for - Kaito’s Kamigami no Senen (still not sure about the reading for the last 2 kanji tbh). I was hoping that this song would be included in the set list T_______T Kaito caused a stir when he appeared on the stage at the back of the arena, which I wasn’t even aware of. Dressed in graceful white robes and enveloped in mist, he was so beautiful to watch, I forgot to breathe... This song is a Big Deal for me because it’s an unseen side of both Kaito and Hayashu; before Kamigami neither have ever performed with such delicate vocals afaik. Even Screen Mode’s ballads have a completely different feel. When the song ended, the audience quietly broke into applause, instead of the cheering or screaming that happened with other songs...

Kyoya appeared back on the main stage with Sand Mirage, dressed in an Arabian Nights-esque costume and matching dancers. I’m very fond of this song, it’s so catchy and seems to fit Kyoya’s vocal range the most! And it definitely showed off his singing skills. Beautiful vibrato on the notes at the end of the chorus ;3;

Sousei and Iori gracefully descended upon the second stage in butler outfits. The yandere Tapestry song! They started off with a short skit, probably lines from the musical, and when Hanae fumbled one of his lines Tosshi teased him about it ww This is one of my favourite duets but sadly the vocals were rather shaky, with both singing off-key at many instances. A+ for the skit, the bedroom lines directed at “ojousama”, and Sousei’s psychotic laugh at the end.

I should love Final Approach since it features my two favs Subaru and Kaito, but unfortunately it’s one of the most boring songs for me... It didn’t stop me from appreciating the singing though. And the beautiful harmonies in the chorus. And the two boys in pilot outfits. And the high-five halfway through the song!! This was also the moment I understood the reason why some people bring two or more pen lights as I couldn’t decide whose colour to use...

Jin and Kyoya rose up from platforms under the stage in shinsengumi robes for Hi ha Noboru(ry. The katanas holstered on their hips were drawn for a fight scene vs the back dancers! The stage was bathed in violet and blue to match the moody atmosphere.

Then Iori and Kaito hopped onto stage and we all bobbed along to Sekai ha Koi to SWEETS! AND! KISS! *waves pen light frantically* This is such a cute song and both Iori and Kaito were super cute, throwing saccharine lines at the audience and getting everyone to join in the fun ;w; Iirc both of them even threw us some flying kisses....

Next, Stronger Than Medicine with Hina and Sousei. In white doctor’s coats and supported by a big group of dancers, Hina played the experienced head doctor while Sousei tagged along like a clueless junior lol. Parts of the dance were very cute and funny for comedic effect, and though for the most part it wasn’t an intense dance routine Tosshi still managed to show off his dancer background >< I kinda wished that we got to see him dance in a more high-tempo song, but Sousei gets all the ballads...

Around this time I noticed that a group of staff were busy setting up some sort of elevated platform-trolley thing at the end of the corridor between the 2nd and 3rd floor; I’d seen something similar happen at the Yuri on Stage event and my heartbeat jumped as I guessed what would happen next...

When the lights turned back on, the rest of the crew had joined Hina and Sousei on stage, and everyone was in their blue and white sailor outifts for Sunshine World Tour! This was the FIRST break in the show, can you believe it? The cast FINALLY introduced themselves (still in-character), and then Sousei announced that the show was about to come to and end, which came as a surprise because it honestly didn’t feel like the show started that long ago, even though we had actually sat through a LOT of songs. The audience began to whine “Ehhhhhhh?” Then the music for Sunshine World Tour started and the cast split into 2 groups, making the audience scream when they headed into the crowd, climbed up the stairs to the 3rd floor, and boarded one of the two trolleys on either end of the corridor. The audience went crazy when they realised what was happening! On the trolley that started from my end of the hall were Kyoya, Jin-san, and Hina, singing and waving enthusiastically at the audience as they traveled around the U-shaped concert hall. I couldn’t believe my eyes when they passed right in front of me... From my seat in the 2nd row they were SO CLOSE, and even at eye level! I honestly could’ve hi-fived them if I stretched out my arm. When the 2nd trolley came by I had my pen light set to orange and hoped Kaito would wave at me, but he was busy engaging the upper floors. Iori met my eyes though and gave me the sweetest smile ;w; They were meant to sing Sunshine World Tour, but very little singing was done as everyone was busy greeting and waving at the audience wwwwwwww It was a real treat for everyone on the 2nd and 3rd floors...

After the trolleys reached the opposite ends of the hall, the cast made their way back to the main stage and we were asked to sing along to the the chorus for a while as lyrics popped up on the screen :D After the song ended, the cast said their thanks and waved goodbye before disappearing backstage. The lights dimmed again and the audience began to chant “Encore~! Encore~!”

We were probably in the dark for about 5 minutes before the cast came back onto stage, dressed in Dream Show 2017 t-shirts. The cast could finally introduce themselves lol. “We can finally speak! As ourselves!!” “It is okay? Can I really start talking? OKAY I’M DOING IT :DDD” Onoyu let loose and chaos descended upon the stage wwwwww There was no outline for this talk segment so they pretty much did whatever they wanted www

What I can recall, in dot points:

Thanked us for all the love and support which allowed YumeCast to reach it’s 2nd anniversary

Ohsaka was super nervous as it’s his first concert, and Tosshi said that he kept muttering “I’m so nervous” up till the moment before their first appearance on stage, yet once he stepped onto stage he slipped right into character and looked so calm and confident

Tosshi and Onoyu admitted that they sing with their faces (their facial expressions are “noisy”)

Tosshi praised Ohsaka for bringing the rowdy team together like a real Kyoya, and Ohsaka lamented the fact that nobody listens to him while the rest of the team surrounded him and danced and hooted like gorillas www

Tosshi thanked the crew and staff for all their hard work behind the scenes, from dance choreography to costumes. Staff were always on standby backstage, ready to help them change into their next outfits, and as he watched the staff work frantically to keep the show running he truly felt like he was part of a real life Yumeiro Company troupe.

Up till the last rehearsal, Hayashu got one of the hand gestures for CALL HEAVEN!! wrong (he made a fox shape instead of a “W” for “welcome”)

Tasuku and Yuuto put in a lot of practice for their dances. Yuuto practiced his zombie shuffle even while out walking in public and got stared at. “My favourite part of the dance is when they lift me up! :D”

Hanae said it was unfair that Hinata could capture everyone’s hearts just with his “Onee~san♥”, so someone suggested everyone do their own version of “oneesan“ and put them to a vote.

Tasuku was up first... and promptly tripped over his first line, in typical Tasuku fashion wwwww I love him, he’s so clumsy and uncoordinated ;3; They gave him a second chance and this time he said something along the lines of “Thank you for your support this past two years!” and ended on a very cute and energetic “oneesan!!!!” Ughhh PUPPYYYYY

Kaito’s embarrassed tsundere “O.. onee...san...”

Sousei’s calm, somewhat sly “Oneesan :)”

The audience cracked up at Kyoya’s “Oneesan, jiken desu.” (Oneesan, there’s been an accident.) I had to look this up but it’s apparently a famous line from an old TV drama called HOTEL, lol

Kyoya’s take 2. A heartfelt message to all the scriptwriters in the audience, followed by the sweetest “...oneesan”.

Hanae did a skit where Iori was surprised but ecstatic about receiving a present from the MC in the form of a limited edition shoebill merch. “Thank you, oneesan!!”

Zun-san..... was Zun-san. “How about we spend the night together? My one and only oneesan♥”

Finally, the last boss. Hinata started to speak in that saccharine-sweet voice, “Boku,” and already half of the audience were screaming from that first word... “I’ll keep on working hard, so keep your eyes on me, okay? Oneesan♥“ *dying whale sounds from audience*

“Why did we even have this competition, we already knew who the winner would be.”

“You had them at “Boku”...”

Tosshi pointed out that they shouldn’t leave out the handful of guys in the audience, so everyone banded together and yelled “Thank you, oniisan!” and the guys responded with “Yeaaaaaaah!!!” haha

Farewell messages, final thoughts, and thank you’s

Ohsaka admitted that in his first year of playing Kyoya he had regrets about accepting the role, but after some time he found ways to connect with Kyoya and he’s very happy to be part of YumeCast. (I had a feeling that he wasn’t enjoying himself when I watched him on YumeCast livestream... turns out my hunch was correct :0 I’m glad that he’s found his place now!)

Next they showed a video announcing upcoming projects (live action musicals, new CD’s, drama CD’s) and the release of the DVD/BD of Dream Show 2017. Everyone else perched on the staircase to watch the video but Tasuku made himself small and sat on the floor with his knees folded primly. Smol puppy....

Lastly, the crew performed NEVER END STORIES as confetti cannons shot glitter over the arena. Then the dancers joined the cast on stage for the final farewell. Everyone took their turn bowing and saying thanks. Kyoya was last to leave the stage, and he lingered for a few moments to thank the audience. Sousei, who was near Kyoya, came up to him and said “Kyoya, let’s go :)” and Kyoya nodded before retreating from the stage. *Audience dies again*

After the show, I remember feeling so happy and satisfied. Of course, every event I’ve attended has been fun, but none of them made me feel as loved and appreciated as YumeCast Dream Show 2017. They knew what we wanted, and they delivered. I rate it 10/10 for being jam-packed with content (honestly, nobody expected them to perform this many songs), and it was very impressive that every song had its own set of costumes and choreography. It really felt like watching a musical show. The concert felt like it ended too soon because everything moved so quickly, but it had actually run for just over 2 hours. I do wish that they had given the cast more talk time, but i guess that was sacrificed to make space for more songs. I can live with that.

I’ve been playing YumeCast for almost a year now and have considered quitting several times since the gameplay gets pretty repetitive after a while (plus new games coming into my life), but after this concert I have fallen in love all over again and will continue to support YumeCast ;3; Honestly, just from watching the monthly livestreams you can tell how hard they try to keep us happy.

#yumeiro cast #hatanaka tasuku #hanae natsuki #ohsaka ryota #ono yuuki #toyonaga toshiyuki #uemura yuuto #hayashi yuu #yumecast #event report

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ourmrmel · 5 years

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Mel Feller, MPA, MHR, Looks at Not Letting Your Passions Rule the Decision Process When Buying a Business.

Mel is the President/Founder of Mel Feller Seminars with Coaching for Success 360, Inc. and Mel Feller Coaching. Mel Feller maintains offices in Texas and in Utah.

For many, the American dream of owning a business is in queue right behind owning a home. I was a teenager when I owned my first business. Since then I have bought or started many businesses and helped others do the same. Here are some common mistakes I have witnessed or committed myself.

Paying too much

This results from the combination of all other mistakes. Many new business owners set themselves up for failure by paying too much, which results in higher loan payments, lower operating funds, and reduced borrowing capacity.

Letting your emotions rule

If you have always dreamed of owning a business, it is very easy to get caught up in the strong emotions invoked by seeing those dreams coming true. To counteract your emotions, take your time, do your homework, and enlist the help of objective advisors.

Paying for potential

You should only pay for the business as it stands at the date of purchase, not what it could be in the future. You will have to spend time, effort, and money to develop its potential. The seller chose not to invest these things, so he does not deserve to be paid for them.

Not evaluating yourself

Do you have what it takes to run this business? Try to match your strengths to the important duties you will be required to perform. Running a small business requires the owner to do many things. No one can be good at them all, so make provisions for those areas in which you are the weakest. Some tasks like payroll and bookkeeping can easily be contracted to outside vendors. Possibly your spouse, other family member, or a partner could do things that you cannot or do not want to do.

Not building a team of experts

At a bare minimum, you should enlist the aid of an attorney and a CPA. The attorney can prepare and review documents, help structure the deal, and make you aware of legal and liability issues. The CPA can provide a financial analysis of the business, and advise you about tax and accounting matters. You should consider adding a business valuation professional. His valuation report can be used to determine the reasonableness of the asking price, negotiate a lower price, and provide valuable information about the business, the industry, the competition, and the economic conditions.

Relying on bad information

You should verify all important information about the business. Your CPA can check financial information like receivables, payables, and inventory. Your attorney can review loan documents, leases, and contracts. Your business valuation professional can analyze the competition, the industry, and the economic conditions. Use independent appraisers to value real estate and equipment. Get a credit report on the business through your CPA or banker. You can do some of the investigating yourself to save money, but do not cut too many corners? It may cost you in the end.

Changing too much, too fast

Once you own the business, you will be tempted to start making wholesale changes from day one. You risk alienating long-time employees and customers. Unless the business is in bad financial condition and needs immediate action, its better to take some time to get to know the business, your employees, and your customers before making changes. This is a perfect time to solicit suggestions from employees and customers.

Buying a business because you like to do what the business does

One reason restaurants have a high failure rate is people buy or start them because they like to cook. Very few restaurant owners spend time cooking. Their time is spent managing staff, ordering supplies, doing paperwork, and handling daily crises. A small business owner must wear many hats including that of manager.

Not being interested in the business’s product or service

I made the mistake of thinking that because I am well versed in the purchase and selling of businesses and smart that I could own and operate any business. I bought a business that sold high-performance auto parts to young men who drove jacked-up, four-wheel drive pickup trucks and went to the drag races every weekend. I did not do either and never understood why anyone would. I could not relate to my customers and went out of business in about a year.

However, that is where you need to perform the due diligence and not let your emotions rule the buying decision.

When it comes to the performance of their small business most owners fall into one of these categories:

Dissatisfied

Somewhat Satisfied

Not Sure

Dissatisfied

Your business is not performing up to your expectations. You do not mind working hard, but you are not making any progress. Sometimes it feels like you are actually going backwards. You keep trying to improve your business, but nothing seems to work. Alternatively, you just do not know where to start. Your business advisors are not much help either. They throw numbers at you and tell you things you already know. You need help, but do not know where to turn.

Somewhat Satisfied

Your business is doing okay, but you want more. More sales. More profits. More time away from the business. More peace of mind and less stress. The traditional methods of analyzing a business show that you are doing well. You need something more in-depth that goes beyond ratios and statistics.

Not Sure

You think your business is doing okay, but you are not sure. Ratios and statistics give you some comparison, but really do not show you the specific areas of strength and weakness. You have a nagging suspicion that there are some significant problems right below the surface, which are just waiting to jump out at you. You want to nip them in the bud before they have a chance to do that. You really need some help to identify and address any developing issues.

Question - If a problem or issue threatens the existence of your business, when do you want to find out about it?

When it is too late

Just in time to save the business

Far enough in advance so I can eliminate the problem before it gets serious

Fixing Problems

Most problems are easy to find. They tend to shout right in your ear. You are just not sure exactly what causes them or how to fix them. If you do not find the root of a problem, you end up treating the symptoms without curing it. Sometimes the treatment makes the problem worse. Quick and dirty fixes tend to just delay or lessen bad outcomes. Often there are so many factors involved that fixing one problem creates new ones.

Hidden Business Killers

A number of problems that individually appear to be rather minor, but are clustered around a core business function.

Core strengths that became life-threatening weaknesses due changes in the marketplace that caught you by surprise.

Nagging problems that just cannot seem to be fixed

Sticky issues that no one wants to discuss let alone try to fix.

Anomalies that recur but no one makes the connection.

Little issues that grow into big ones while everyone is still ignoring them.

Problems that have not been recognized yet.

Buying a business is a complicated, emotional process. By avoiding these costly mistakes, you can prevent turning your dream into a nightmare.

Mel Feller, MPA, MHR, is a well-known real estate, business consultant, personal development consultant and speaker, specializing in performance, productivity, and profits. Mel is the President/Founder of Mel Feller Seminars with Coaching For Success 360, Inc. and Mel Feller Coaching, a real estate and business specific coaching company. His three books for real estate professionals are systems on how to become an exceptional sales performer. His four books in Business and Government Grants are ways to leverage and increase your business Success in both time and money! His book on Personal Development “Lies that Will Sabotage Your Success”. Mel Feller is in Texas and In Utah. Currently an MBA Candidate.

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