#i don't even know how powerful my irl decks are

[dravidious]

You're really awesome

PROBLEM: I want to make magic decks with my cards irl, but I have no one to play them against.

SOLUTION: Make an entire custom deck that can play itself to more or less replicate an opponent.

I decided to put the rules in card form as conspiracy cards, but it turns out that rules should be written as rules, not cards, so I had to make extensive notes about each of them (except Industrial Expansion, that one is actually effects instead of rules). I also just enjoy talking about my design choices.

Notes: Creating waste tokens instead of playing lands is basically free card advantage, as well as preventing mana screw/flood. The bot is supposed to have more raw strength than the player, so this isn’t a huge problem, but the starting hand size reduction and 5 land limit are still needed balance it.

Also, I know wastes isn’t actually a basic land type, but it makes the card so much cleaner so "Wastes token" is a predefined token here just like Treasure and Food.

Notes: There’s probably some awkward edge cases here too. I fixed the only one I could find (involving Recycle Bin), but there might be more. The main guiding rule in playing the bot is "don’t make it do obviously dumb stuff." The cards are balanced around the rigid rules, so bad decisions are okay, but sometimes there are plays that are so worthless or actively counterproductive that you really ought to step in. Edge cases should be resolved in whatever way makes the bot play best. Ideally, you shouldn’t have to think too hard about what the bot does; it’s supposed to be automatic, after all. The other guiding rule is "make this similar to a normal game of Magic."

Notes: Much, much simpler than Defense Protocol. Still some vagueness, but good enough to prevent swinging into the opponent’s 4/4 with a 3/3. It applies on a creature-by-creature basis; if you have a 3/3 with flying and a 2/1, and your opponent has a 4/4, the 2/1 won’t attack, but the 3/3 will. If you have a 2/1 and a 5/4, only the 5/4 will attack since the 2/1 can be fully blocked by the 4/4.Non-lethal battles are tricky; if you have a 2/1 and the opponent has a 0/3, you shouldn’t attack because then you’re just tapping down your 2/1. But if you have a pair of 2/1s, you should attack for the free damage. You could reinterpret the "such that they lose no life" bit, but that would result in the rules telling you to swing your creatures into into a 4/4. Basically, use your best judgement; this stuff is too complicated to write out. You’re smart enough.

Notes:

This card would be a fucking nightmare to properly template. Good thing it’s a rule and not actually a card. The vague wording can probably result in lots of edge cases, but this card is basically meant to say "The bot makes the best blocks possible" so use your best judgement in those cases. Activated abilities that boost a creature should be taken into account if mana is open for them. A version of the blocking rules not in card form is given below.

Priority 1: If you can block in such a way that your life total remains above 0, you must do so.

Priority 2: If a blocker can deal lethal damage to an attacker and survive, it must block that creature.

Priority 3: If a blocker can deal lethal damage to an attacker, or if it can survive, it must block that creature.

Priority 4: Don’t block.

Misc 1: If multiple attackers are tied for the highest block priority, the blocker must block the creature with the highest power. If tied, highest toughness, then highest mana value, then choose randomly.

Misc 2: Multi-block an attacker only if it has menace or a similar ability, only with the minimum number of blockers, and only if it falls under a blocking priority (ex. it’s threatening to win the game, or it can be destroyed, or both your blockers survive). Anything else could be a nightmare to calculate.

And that's all the rules/conspiracies, which should allow for playing against the bot while making as few decisions as possible. Here's the cards. The bot's deck consists of 4 copies of each card for a clean 60 deck, compatible for testing against mill.

#asks #custom cards #is this properly balanced? i have no idea #i don't even know how powerful my irl decks are #this once again suffers from the problem of me not bothering to actually print out and playtest my stuff #in hindsight i should've come up with some way of adjusting the difficulty #and then designed the cards around that #maybe an ability word like “hard mode -- this creature gets +1/+1” #or a couple conspiracies that shift it up or down #instead i just made all the cards somewhat overpowered to compensate for the stupidity and lack of synergy #good thing i haven't printed it yet lol #also it has a robot theme because mindless robots obeying their programming fit the idea #but they aren't artifact creatures because that would make artifact removal disproportionately strong #i made sure to put an artifact and an enchantment in to make sure that artifact/enchantment removal is useful #i also put design notes on some of the noncreature cards #i can share those if you want lol #also i just noticed the 4-drop creatures are kinda weak #changing them to a 6/4 and 4/5 to make sure they can do their jobs #there's been a few PvE formats in mtg but none that try to replicate a real game of magic #i wanted a format you could play a normal deck against and have it be sort of realistic

[belzrgr]

Lorcan Lore

Bit about Lorcan's backstory and how he got to meet the straw hats. Lorcan is my one piece OC who I made for self insert purposes, though he's not very much a self insert considering I'm much different from him irl

Cw: child abuse mention, kidnapping, abuse of power, canon typical violence

As a child, Lorcan grew up in a rural, peaceful village on an island in north blue. His life was as ordinary as they come, until pirates ransacked the village. However, they didn't just rob the place but took pleasure in killing every person there as well. He was told to hide but he still saw a the people he had grown up with and loved getting killed before his eyes.

Despaired and angry, Lorcan took a knife that had fallen near his hiding spot and charged at the captain of the pirates. Of course, he had no chance against him and the man lifted Lorcan by his hair with a laugh. The pain made the boy cry out and let go of the knife to scratch at the hand holding him up instead.

"Aren't you a funny little urchin?" - The pirate captain snarled and threw Lorcan to the floor. - "Take that thing with us. I think we could use some entertainment on the ship."

He was made to clean most everything, only eating the scraps that would otherwise have been thrown away overboard by the crew. They pushed and hit him when they felt like it, laughing at his pain. Lorcan wanted to try and leave somehow but he didn't know how. He was never let off the ship, tied to a pole below deck whenever the pirates found another place to dock on and with how little they let him eat and the wounds he got every day, he was much too weak to try and become stronger.

That was, until one of the crew was sloppy enough to forget a knife relatively close to where Lorcan was bound up. He sawed and sawed at the thick rope, nervous to the point he felt nauseous. If he didn't manage to escape and they found out what he had been trying to do, who knows what they would do to him? The screams and sounds of fighting he could hear muffled by the wooden walls of the ship told Lorcan that they were at a smaller island with a little village again. They only ever took on innocent, weak people to kill and take advantage of.

The short elation he felt when he finally managed to cut the rope died when he noticed how eerily quiet it had gotten. Did they already finish them all off? Was he too late and they would come back any minute now? Lorcan had planned to escape by using the chaos as a distraction but now it seemed that he was doomed.

A thud made him flinch before more of the same sound followed in even intervals, coming closer and making the wood above him creak. Footsteps. He was almost too scared to notice that the were unfamiliar.

The hatch opened and an adult made their way below deck but it wasn't any of the crew that held him captive. No, it was a stranger.

A woman with a dark brown skintone that made Lorcan think she looked warm. Especially with the gold ornaments in her braided hair and earrings reflecting the sun from behind her. Despite her cold, expressionless eyes, Lorcan felt way less on edge than he thought he should and it confused him to no end.

She was a bounty hunter, he would later find out. After a brief exchange, she had decided to take Lorcan with her - under her wing. It was needed now more than ever, since the pirates had taken him with them to the grand line and it was no secret that danger lurked around every corner there.

"If you don't learn, you die", she told him when he complained about being too tired to continue training, "or you will be trampled on for other's enjoyment. It's your choice."

No matter his first thoughts on her, she was anything but warm. The kindest thing she did was show him how to survive and that was all their relationship amounted to as well. When Lorcan asked her what he should call her, he thought he imagined her face twitch for once. In displeasure.

"I have no name for you."

While he was sure she did have a name, she would never tell him and likewise never called him by his even after he told her multiple times. It was her way to keep him at arms length he felt like.

Within two years, he had learned how to move about so not even the flighty birds could notice him. Lorcan was nimble and fast, climbing and jumping and running with such speed all while being ready to swing his blades at any point. Though he never managed to defeat his nameless teacher, Lorcan could subdue most anyone else he came across if need be. When she brought him along for a hunt, she told him to try and get the job done without her interference and once he successfully defeated the target, she merely nodded at him.

That was the last day he saw her. The feeling of loss that Lorcan thought he should have felt trapped under water. She had come into his life, given him knowledge and skills and left as soon as she thought that Lorcan could fend for himself well enough. It didn't really surprise him all that much if he was honest with himself and while his life would surely be different now, he didn't really care.

Somewhere along those two years, emotions had become too exhausting to keep up with. Losing himself in the training, the physical exertion and pain, the ambition and the effort to survive was more than enough. They had never talked much and Lorcan didn't get to talk to strangers either, since he was so focused on becoming better, becoming stronger, faster, more skilled. At some point, he didn't really know anymore how to talk to other people. His sentences were short and to the point and it made him uncomfortable when anyone demanded he hold a real conversation with them.

What was real anyway, he would question himself. Perhaps those talks people had over the weather, about other people who did this and that or something about what they felt. But what did Lorcan even feel that he could talk about? It was just bothersome and uncomfortable, as he didn't feel the need or want to explain who he was to strangers.

Sometimes, when he felt alone, Lorcan would sit on the rooftops of a village to listen to the people inside talk to each other. He could also go into the bar and listen to people there - even watch them - but it was often so loud and rowdy in there and then there were people who tried to talk to him and Lorcan wanted nothing more than to disappear into dust.

It was more than enough to fight, bring in bounties and survive on that. He didn't need anything else, he would tell himself.

People were strange creatures. Full of lies, greed and violence. Not that Lorcan could say much about the latter since he was a fighter himself, yet he could confidently say that he had no need to lie and there wasn't much he wanted either. He couldn't understand why some wanted to take advantage of those weaker than them, like the pirates who destroyed his village in his youth and took him with them, or hurt others for pleasure.

Seeing those without power get hurt made an emotion rise within him that for once, made him unable to think clearly. It was rage.

Even if his expression didn't change much, his jaw clenched and his eyes hardened. There was no way he would let those who abused their strength and power go unscathed and after some time going around from island to island, people began to talk about him. They recognized Lorcan but he didn't much care for it either way. Nobody really knew him and speculations and rumors would always circulate no matter what you did.

He didn't have anyone whose opinion he cared about anyway. There was nobody he truly needed.

That was, until he met a pirate crew with a captain who wore a straw hat and had a smile so big that it made Lorcan stare wide eyed the first time he saw it. It was so genuine and pure. Unfiltered. Unlike most people he had seen throughout his life, Monkey D. Luffy was a man who wasted no energy on complicated conversations, plans or emotions. If he was happy, he laughed. If he was angry, he fought and if he was sad, he cried. It felt like looking into a mirror, except that it showed you not yourself but the opposite of what you are.

Lorcan was intruiged but that was it. He didn't search the captain or his crew out - he wouldn't know what to say anyway - and he didn't stalk them either. While they were on the same island, he saw them here and there, until the strawhat pirates got into a fight that escalated.

Lorcan found himself helping the citizens so they wouldn't be crushed by destroyed buildings or get hurt in the crossfire of the fight. Somehow, despite the fact they were fighting, some of the Strawhats noticed this, including Luffy. In the end, Lorcan ended up fighting side by side with the captain to defeat a corrupt Marine admiral who didn't care for the safety of the regular people if it meant he could get a trip from being rich and powerful. Something he had seen enough times by then and hated just as much as he did the first time he came across such a person.

After the fight, Luffy asked Lorcan to join the crew. He had already been calling him a friend out of nowhere and Lorcan didn't correct him. For a while, he had stared at the ship and Luffy and his crew and then, without a word, he left.

He ran so quickly that it took the crew a moment to realise that he had disappeared and the confused yelling could be heard deep into the forest that Lorcan had hid himself into.

It wasn't that he didn't want to join them, it was just that he didn't know what he wanted. The gazes of everyone had gotten to much and the pressure made his whole body itch to get out of there as soon as possible. So he did.

Now, he watched them on deck, wondering what he should do. For some reason, he felt like he would regret it if he were to let them leave without him. No matter how anxious the idea made him, Lorcan couldn't fight the feeling that he should be on that ship with that pirate crew.

Those pirates that helped the weak ones as well. Who cared when there was someone who hurt others for no reason. Who fought by his side and showed interest in him, without urging him to act differently just to please them.

What if he ended up disliking them or the other way around? Or worse, what if he liked them?

No matter what, Lorcan got onto the ship early the next morning despite his fears and conflicting thoughts. Luffy yelled out in joy when he saw him and flung himself over to hug Lorcan with all his might.

At least until the next island, he told himself and if he didn't feel anymore sure than he did now by then, then Lorcan would leave again. This time, he wasn't chained anywhere. He could be where he wanted. With whom he wanted.

#mine #one piece oc #Lorcan #One piece oc: lorcan #Oc lorcan #Oc lore #One piece #Backstory

[team-frightfur]

Revelations from Zexal blind watch.

Ep 7 and 8: How did Fuya not get submitted to Gayest Yugioh character poll? This kid is a textbook small gay.

I like when Astral reveals he's just a little stupid. I love how he cannot tell apart fiction and reality. I love how Yuma is too stupid to explain the difference. "It's just TV!" Astral: I see, so TV records the history of a different dimension! We must investigate further!

I hope this trend continues. Seeing him find his legs/compassion and empathy is delightful. Maybe he can find his toes, too.

Omg! Yuma set a card on his first turn without being asked! He's learning! Sadly, it seems to have come at the cost of his jumping ability. Episode 1 Yuma could easily chase Fuya.

Edit: spoke too soon. For someone who refuses to think of the future or the past, Yuma sure runs a lot of traps.

So like, in episode 7, Yuma says 'Haction' and the subs translate that a to 'Live Action'. Honestly shocked and appalled that he was actually just mispronouncing 'Fiction'. I love this stupid dog.

Shark wins the prize for Worst Duel Runner.

Ep 9: This is the kind of episode where you watch as a kid and like, its funny, but as an adult its just terrifying. Like has this catgirl been stripping Yuma naked at night? 5 times a week? I'm scared. Please lock your windows.

I love how Astral is completely oblivious. "I thought stalkers coming into your room was normal." Today on 'Astral Learns Common Sense': the right to privacy!

Omg I'm so proud of Yuma, if he tries he can do it. He can strategise! He can win! he doesn't even need Astral... sometimes! Go go go!

The implication that Astral understands romance more than Yuma. The implication he's been watching romance shows on TV.

Ep 10

Cursed

Shark: So like, I'll duel you, but I gotta head home and grab my deck first. Don't move ok. I gotta walk to the gang hole, grab my duel runner, drive home, grab my deck, drive back. Won't take a moment.

Omg my boy has been improving for real! Yuma set a card all on his own! Too bad Shark runs fucking MST! Actual pro. Whats next? Book of Moon? Crackdown? Compulsory Evacuation Device?

Me: Astral is salting Yuma for not reading graveyards as if anyone reads graveyards.

My Irl Friend: I read graveyards.

Me: Don't talk to me.

Shark deserved that win. He deserved that win so much I'm so proud of him! He spent the last three weeks imagining their next duel, how he'd win, all Yuma's weaknesses. Excellent.

Ep 11 and 12: What genre does shark think he's in. Gangster flick?

Tetsuo is so mad at Yuma for using Numbers but like, what else is he supposed to use? Gagaga beatdown?

Also, everyone keeps saying Yuma's playing this tag duel suboptimally, but without seeing his hand how are we supposed to know? Did he specifically summon Utopia before using S/T removal? Did he have S/T removal? No? then it's not a 'Reckless' summon, Astral! It's 'getting two future Xyz mats off my field and replacing them with a substantial protective body!'

Glad to see Yuma's genuine improvement, though. Admittedly, the end of the duel involving 6 different backrow made me want to just. Drop in. Summon Sat Cannon. Watch the chaos.

Ep 13 and 14: Kaito walking in here freezing time and unleashing a magical girl tranformation. Walked out of a different show. Good for him. Powerful. I like how deranged he is here. Already better.

For a guy who supposedly doesnt like eating souls, you sure did make "Imma eat your soul" a catchphrase, Kaito. You sure smile alot while killing people, Kaito. Holy shit tho, he runs 3 of his monsters. C o n s i s t e n c y.

Kaito truly is a magical girl, specifically, he's a dark magical girl in the vein of Fate Testarossa. Your days are numbered, Kaito. Friendship is coming.

Yuma you were doing so well. Why did you not set that card befoooooore.

Episode 15 and 16: Does this imply that Zexal is the timeline of Gx and Dm but 5ds was deleted from the universe along with synchro summoning? Anyway I literally lined my comm while my friend watched because I lost interest instantly.

#zexal is revealing that Im yumacore and irl friend is astralcore #take that as you will #team frightfur watches zexal

[wistfulwisp]

Ezra

He/they

I'm not sure what my favorite animal is anymore? Anything that will love cuddling with me ig :3

My question for the 1 card reading:

I feel so, so lonely. So isolated amongst the people around me, irl. I feel unseen and unheard and like a phariah, sometimes. In my home, in communities I frequent.

I want friends again. I want people in my life whom I can trust and who want me there and care for me deeply. I want to feel seen and cared for and loved by people other than myself, who don't feel like they exist in my phone.

How do I find them? Or, how long will I need to wait before I find them? Or- what's a lesson I need to learn now before I can be ready for them?

Whichever question the deck wants to answer, I guess. I'm not quite sure what I want to ask first. I'm in a massive transitory period, it feels like. I feel desperate and antsy and deeply lonely. And I fell into the trap of putting all of my eggs in one basket again, and I just... I need to move forward, but I don't know what to do with all of this fear and pain. From feeling alone in the world.

So the first thing that I wanted to say is that I am just … very sorry that you feel so alone in the world right now. We’ve been mutuals and friends on Tumblr for a long time, or at least I consider you to be my friend, and I definitely empathize with your situation. I know exactly how it feels to Feel like, despite the world being such a largely populated place, that you are the only person in the entire world, and to feel as though if you were to stretch out your hands as far as they go in any direction, you would never hit anyone for a 5 mile radius. You know what I’m saying?

Anyways, I consider you to be my friend I care about you, and know that even though I am just a person talking to you through a screen that there’s someone out there that understands and that my DM‘s are always open and my ask box is always open and that you have a friend in me, and this is one of those moments where I don’t have much else to offer you, but I do hope that… that offers a little bit of comfort.

-

Secondly, I want to quickly mention that, despite me describing tarot to a lot of people as a “therapeutic tool“ that tarot is obviously not a replacement for therapy. I see this because tarot offers me a great opportunity to connect with you to connect with your feelings, and it offers you a great opportunity to see your emotions all laid out for you, but it cannot replace a professional opinion, or any sort of systematic and regulated help that you could get in situations like this. The reason I describe this a therapeutic tool is because I find the tarot has this stereotype of being a tool of clairvoyance, Which I do appreciate in media but I don’t often appreciate in reality because I don’t think that Tarot should be used to manipulate people into believing that you’re talking to the dead or that you can predict the future with 100% accuracy. What I love about tarot is the opportunities it creates to connect with people and connect with yourself, however let it be known that I’m not a therapist 😂 and I cannot provide any sort of regulated or professional comfort. However, I can pull a card for you and see what the cards have to say. 

judgement: judgement first and foremost is a major arcana, meaning that it typically represents larger stages of life or problems that are at the forefront of your mind in the moment of getting this reading. Judgement can represent a few different things, the biggest thing being a calling to a higher purpose, or from a higher power. Whether that some sort of religious figure or whether that’s just your own intuition, judgement reminds you that we are constantly being called to serve a higher purpose. If you feel as though in your life right now, you are being called to do something drastic or being called to change paths and there is a belief within you that that change of course will make you happier, This is a sign to go for it. the other aspect of this card is your own judgement of the world, or the way in which you perceive the world around you or yourself. It’s a card of self-evaluation and of reflection. Judgement reminds us to have a clear yet critical vision of the way that the world is around us, and to acknowledge that the way in which we see the world is often not the way the world actually is, but that your perception of the world is the way the world is for you. It calls us to not be overly critical, but to also not be passive in allowing certain things to happen, and believing that we have no control over them. in terms of your questions specifically, I think this card calls you to take action, and to acknowledge that you do have control and power in this situation. it doesn’t really tell you how long you’ll have to wait to find a solution to your problems or how you will find a solution, but I think that it provides a good perspective to go into these problems with the lesson that the cards are trying to teach you: that the world is full of opportunities to be critical and opportunities to be analytical and opportunities to become closer to who you want to be, and that you have the power to get there. I hope that makes sense I know that that may be rather vague, but if you ever wanted another single card reading on this or a paid reading, I’d be happy to provide that for you. Or if you even just wanted someone to listen again, my DM’s are always open. 

#k #elmosworld #tarot #and honestly I’d be happy to give you like #a three card reading on the house just bc #well you’re my friend on this hellsite and I get what you’re going through #dm me if you’re interested #if not that’s okay too #Ezra

[mother-snake]

🎶Guess whos back🎶 🎶back again🎶

It's me! With more Janus angst! Well, more fluff then anything... It's fluff (did you really think we could pass the 4 year anniversary of sanders sides and I wouldn't send something in?)

So!! The sides are having a huge party to celebrate 4 years. The living room is decked in all the colours of the rainbow. A mixture of all the sides music are playing through the speakers and all their favourite foods are set up. Everyone is in the living room, talking and dancing mostly but Virgil did climb on top of the fridge when Roman took out glitter. Well, everyone is in the living room except for a certain snake like side.

Janus didn't join the party. Hes still in his room in the mindscape. Not from lack of effort from the others. They knocked on his door for half an hour straight with no answer. So they just accept that Janus is going to miss this year.

At least all accept Patton.

Patton snatched Remus from the party and made him lock pick the door open. Patton opened the door slowly -so that if Jan was sleeping it wouldn't disturb him. Patton felt his heart drop when he saw the yellow side's room.

The walls were covered with scuffs and tears in the Victorian wallpaper, almost all the furniture was flipped and destroyed -burns coating some of the edges, Janus' prized record player was smashed to pieces and all of the light bulbs were shattered. Stuttering out a soft curse (holy smokes, fudge, sugar honey ice tea, etc) Patton summoned the others.

Instant chaos. Virgil immediately goes to "oh my god, Janus is dead. I need to pick up a larger work load. Thomas is never going to be able to lie again. Patton is trying to hold back tears and calm down Virgil Logan is looking throughout the room, deducing that there was a massive struggle, some things are burned but only in concentrated places and there is a small pool of blood by some shattered glass. The twins say that they feel some magic from the imagination in the room. The sides decide to follow the clues and go to the imagination to see if they can find anything else.

Luckily for them! The imagination works with a different time! 24 hours in the imagination is one hour irl. So they should be back for the party!!

When they enter the imagination the first thing they see is a bowler hat that is stained with blood and a set of foot prints. They follow it as well with picking up the hat.

Logan notices that the corner is burned and the blood is fresh -still wet and it hasn't darkened yet-

While walking they pay close attention to their surroundings and chat about what movies they want to watch when they get back to the party. The footprints are becoming scarce so they follow the occasional droplet of blood and torn piece of clothing.

They walk for hours with only the birds and setting sun to keep them company. They decide to stop and rest for the night when Logan almost falls in a hole that was hidden by the lack of light. Roman summons a few sleeping bags and sets up a fire while Virgil takes first watch. Switching throughout the night.

The next day continues more or less like it did the day before. Walking and talking.

This time ,after crossing a river, they find a yellow glove soaked in blood, some scales stuck on the fabric. If their hurry wasn't there before it was now. They quicken their pace even more. Leaving the forest they were in and moving into some plains, they thought they heard distant shouting.

"don't let me right now you monster!"

"you have no idea what I'm not capable of when I'm mad!"

"Sooner or later the others won't catch up with you!!"

All with the S' slurred and sarcastic tone that they knew oh so well. They walked up a hill to see Janus tied to a pyre, blond curls a mess and matted with dried blood, clothes torn and some scales torn off. They looked to the insane bastard that thought kidnapping the snake was a good idea to see not just one bastard. But over 30 bastards!!

Janus got kidnapped by a cult.

The cult was very stereotypical; black cloaks, a few sacrificed goats and white porcelain masks with painted scales on their face -wait a sec... Scales? Yes scales. Deceit has a cult devoted to him- and thats when it clicks for them. They want to sacrifice Janus to appease Deceit. This cult doesn't know that Janus IS Deceit. The sides face palmed when they realized how dumb these cultists are.

The cultists seem really annoyed with Janus' complaining so they gag him all while he was yelling at how he was going to skin these fucking people alive to make a skin suit -Remus was proud- but sadly. Threats don't mean much if you're tied to a pole and about to be set on fire. The people continue to prepare the dumbest sacrifice ever while the others try to figure out how to free Janus.

Virgil looks closer at the items the cultists have laid out. A spider corpse, an octopus tentacle, a bulls horn, a cats eye and a few crow feathers... This wasn't a Janus cult. This was a Dark Side cult. Virgil let out a heavy sigh and told the others his plan.

Remus and Virgil turned into their dark forms. Spider legs coming out of Virgil's back along with six more eyes sprouted, his hair also turned purple. Remus had oozing green tentacles rip from his back and his skin took a sickening green tinge, his white hair stripe also turned neon green. They teleported behind the cultists and let out animalistic growls.

The cult turned around to see the people they worshipped having a pissed off expression on their face and instantly knew they fucked up. They fell to their knees and begged for mercy all while Virgil chewed them out for kidnapping the actual Deceit -thats when that threat of a skin suit really sunk in- and how creepy it was to try to burn someone alive and to at least have some class when sacrificing someone- that went on for a while.

The other three snuck behind the cult and untied Janus, the second they untied his hands Janus ripped off the gag and turned into his dark form.

He grew six arms and his eyes glowed with a intense yellow. Golden snakes wrapped around his arms and then he let out a low hiss.

Janus sent the snakes to tie the cultists arms behind their backs and stepped down from the pyre. To be honest; every side there thought that Janus was going to murder 30 people and actually skin them, but that is NOT WHAT HAPPENNED!!!

No one expected Janus to yell at them like a disappointed mother for 2 hours straight and keep their mouths shut with his powers.

"-AND NOT ANOTHER THING! If you ignorant self centered pricks ever, and I don't mean ever, lay a single hand on another side again. YOU WILL ALL BE BURNED AT THE FUCKING STAKE!-" he went on for a while...

The ironic thing was that Janus was the youngest side so this was equal to hearing your toddler threaten arson.

After Janus was done he turned around and snatched his glove from the nearby table and changed back to his normal form all while mumbling about "some insane crazy assholes who fucking kidnapped me in the middle of scale care, fucking pricks." The other sides just followed him. Virgil and Remus changing back as they quickly caught up with Janus.

Remus could not stop laughing, Virgil was shocked that Janus could be a disappointed mother without having children, Roman was just amazed by the fact that the snake was still standing after some of those injuries. Patton wanted to give him a hug.... Ok multiple hugs... Fine he wanted to snuggle. And Logan? Logan just wanted to know more about the dark forms.

The walk was quicker back then it was to rescue the snake all while listening to Janus complaining that the pricks broke his record player and that they had the bloody AUDACITY to kidnap him! All they could think about was when Thomas called Janus the main mean girl and that they couldnt even deny it anymore.

When they made it back they patched up Janus and let him take a shower before sinking back out to join Thomas, who was just watching the office for the millionth time (pick another show sanders, I beg of you) he did perk back up when he realized that the sides were back. Then he saw the pissed off look on Janus' face... and he asked what was wrong. That set JanJan Binks off again as the others were getting a bit tired of hearing this again for the fifth time that day. So like how you distract a child.

They put on 'Chicago, the musical' and let the songs of Roxie Hart distract the snake. It worked, he shut up real quick!

The sides vowed to never let Janus get kidnapped ever again because that was.... An experience, that they DO NOT want to do again!

Thankfully the rest of the day went off well.

~~~~~

And that was an idea from 1am from someone who should be asleep! I was gonna make this angsty but all I could imagine was a pissed of Janus yelling at 30 adults.

I doubt you would want to use this but feel free! I hope this is as funny as my sleep deprived brain thinks it is!

(I'm sorry for any typos, it is very late)

(I got it! Just forgot to post it yesterday ^-^')

One, Yes. I love it. The beautiful angst... And ferral janus is something I absolutely die for.

(would say more but my brain has short circuited and I'm in boi, strict teach... But I'll put more later!)

#Tw blood #virgil sanders #thomas sanders #roman sanders #janus sanders #Roman sanders #Remus sanders #Patton sanders #logan sanders #tw kidnapping

[finding-fallen-stars]

YGO Questionnaire Part 2 Electric Boogaloo

So, my gf/bf @howaboutalittlehelpneos tagged me to do this again a... good long while ago, and I had wanted to wait until I'd finished my GX rewatch before trying this again. But ouch oof I accidentally also got through all of 5Ds again before getting to this lol

But the 5Ds rewatch definitely reshaped a lot of my thoughts, so... cracks knuckles. This won't be spoiler free, fair warning~

Favorite Series: ugh the formatting killed my original essay on this but okay GX and 5Ds are pretty tied in my book, now-- I love them equally, but in different ways! GX fulfills my love for subversive coming-of-age stories with a heartwarming, humorous, and also soulcrushing touch, and I love how each season brings a new story and new characters-- it's like reading installments of a novel series, and I think the formatting works wonders for it as a whole. It has some absolutely phenomenal character writing, too-- even the characters I dislike are ones I can appreciate for what they introduce to the story! And honestly, not enough people give the first two seasons of GX the credit it deserves: they're half the charm, really. How are you going to feel the full impact of the heartbreaking content in seasons 3 and 4 if you aren't properly attached to the characters?

But on 5Ds's side of things... it fulfills my love for stories with time loops, found family, human nature, and of course, love and death and how they intertwine. I love how the leading characters are just a bunch of broken kids from broken circumstances who all find a home with each other, and of course, how it highlights class disparity and how fucked up the prison/"justice" systems are. Yea, sure, maybe it underwent executive meddling and all, but I genuinely love it for what it is and I wish more people appreciated it... my only problem with 5Ds is the untwist with Z-ONE and then the ending s m h I adore it overall and I could go off for a long while on it. Overall, these are my two instinctive recommendations for anyone getting into Yugioh!

(look at these boys they're so important) Favorite Protagonist: Oh, believe me, absolutely nothing has changed here-- Yusei Fudo is and always will be my favorite protagonist, and my rewatch only solidified that.

I just... love him so much? He's seen so much hell in his life and carries so much guilt on his shoulders, but he still has room in his heart to believe in others and to believe that anyone can defy fate and find hope even at rock bottom. I love that he's initially introduced as this quiet, brooding figure when he really just turns out to be a huge softie who wears his heart on his sleeve half the time and wants to bring about change for Satellite and its people. Plus I just really love that his greatest flaw is something that would ordinarily be a positive trait-- he's Overly self-sacrificial, to the point where he's basically setting himself on fire to keep others warm, and that's not really framed as something Heroic

Just... he makes me so happy. I have two Yusei charms that I ordinarily keep on my keys (one was a gift from Zenzen) and they're a constant source of serotonin for me. He's Peak comfort character for me. Best protag in my book Favorite Rival: Same deal here-- still Manjoume!

look at him he's so important

While he spends a lot of the anime getting the good old damsel in distress treatment (getting suckered into a cult, getting knocked into a coma, becoming a zombie, getting fucking Killed, etc), I still think his character arc is really well-written overall and I only appreciated it even more when I watched GX again. I love the fact that he's got a soft heart he buries beneath the edgy facade, and that he's simultaneously really sharp and also kind of dense lol. He's just a fun character and watching how he evolves from episode one to episode one hundred eighty is such a satisfying journey.

Plus, props to him for being such a versatile duelist-- 50 wins in a row is HARD as is, let alone with a deck full of cards he just found laying around in the Arctic. Three ace monsters, three different archetypes... he's a really good duelist and I'm proud of him for it

Oh, but honestly, I don't really dislike any of the rivals-- I'm neutral towards Revolver and Reiji, but the remaining four (Kaiba, Manjoume, Jack, and Shark) compel me. yes I accidentally wound up liking Jack Atlas shhh Favorite BFF: Honestly, I really like most of the characters who fit this archetype-- Joey, Crow, Gongenzaka, Soulburner... I still lean a little bit more towards Joey, but I really appreciate all four of them. I'm gonna say Joey again, just because I find his evolution as a character the most compelling, but I appreciate the other three a lot. Soulburner has the best design though Favorite GFF: Oh absolutely still Aki, but I honestly... really love most female Yugioh characters? I'm assuming this is lead girls only, but like. I'm dumb and gay and I love Girls so this is naturally the most difficult one for me to answer lol

Aki just resonates with me the most because she's the prime example of how trauma doesn't always manifest in palatable ways-- when we first meet her, she's angry and lashes out at anyone and anything just because she wants the world to suffer in the same ways she's suffered, and then... we get to watch her grow from that, once she's free from Divine and able to heal the way she needs to heal. I know the second half of 5Ds didn't give her character the attention it deserved, but I'm still proud of her for winding up on the path she did-- seeing her channel her power and energy into wanting to heal and help others was just so good and was one of the few things I really Loved about the 5Ds ending.

oh, but like. Asuka Tenjoin and Aoi Zaizen are very close seconds for me!!! Aki just has a vice grip on my heart Favorite Villain: Okay, it's still technically Vector-- I think he's the most entertaining, well-written, and effective villain out of all of the ones we've seen so far, but... I also want to add Takuma Saiou and then all of Yliaster as honorable mentions?

As someone fond of tarot myself, I was naturally pretty intrigued by Saiou the first time I watched GX, but my attachment to him only grew the second time around where I actually got the chance to understand his character better. Plus, like... the visuals with him are fucking astounding and he's always so interesting to watch.

As for Yliaster, I just... really love how the big bad of 5Ds turned out to just essentially be a broken man desperate to save anyone and anything and three robotic reconstructions of the friends he'd lost. I still think the untwist with Z-ONE was stupid and I much prefer the idea of him and Yusei being the same person, but I'm still compelled by the other three-- well. Paradox less so, because we don't get a lot of Paradox lore, but. Aporia and Antinomy for sure.

ugh Yugioh has some damn good villains

Favorite Card: now that I actually play the TCG game...

Stardust is always going to be my favorite of all cards because it checks every box for me (my favorite YGO character's ace monster, space theme, what more could I want), but Aromaseraphy Rosemary has really become one of my aces in my best TCG deck! I'm still mastering irl plays, but I'm happy with my progress and I love my plant gang...

Favorite Episode: alright, here's where there's actually been a Lot of change, so...

Season 0: Episode 16: "Turnabout by a Hair's Breadth - The White-Robed Crisis" -- The more I think about this one, the more I love it; there's a... lot of corruption in the medical industry, and I've seen a lot of it firsthand, so just. Seeing a corrupt doctor get what he deserved at the end was cathartic, in a way? Plus, a Jounouchi-centric episode is always a good time.

Duel Monsters: Episodes 96-97: "Darkness vs. Darkness/One Turn Kill" -- this hasn't changed, I still love seeing Marik and Bakura bitch at each other for two whole episodes LMAO

GX: Episode 152: "Activate Super-Fusion! Rainbow Neos" -- This one hasn't changed and it likely never will-- I take so much pride in seeing Judai push forward, past the fear and guilt he's carrying, all to save Johan... it's cathartic and I never get sick of watching it.

5Ds: sweats. still all of Crash Town, but also episodes 137-147-- the Ark Cradle is one of my favorite parts of 5Ds and one of my favorite YGO arcs period, and even though each duel is a fucking gut punch, I love the emotional intensity and weight in each episode... It hurts but in a mostly good way

Zexal: Episode 143: "The Aloof Duelist 'Nasch': The Destined Final Duel" -- this one hasn't changed! Still hurts, still love it, I still weep over Ryouga Shark Kamishiro on a daily basis

Arc-V: Episodes 81-82: "Our Respective Battlefields/The Ultimate Falcon VS The Black-Feathered Thunder" -- Okay, honestly, this was hard because I... genuinely. really don't like Arc-V very much at all lol (it's just not my cup of tea, but more power to those who do like it!), but I thought this duel was a lot of fun! Shun is my absolute favorite from Arc-V and I really like the friendship he struck up with Crow a lot, so here we are

VRAINS (so far): Episode 25-26: "Virus Deck Operation/Three Draws Leading to Hope" -- honestly I am so biased because I just really love Blue Angel and I loved seeing her get a well-deserved victory like this lol. I'm not done with VRAINS, so this is probably gonna change, but anytime Blue Angel or Soulburner are on screen, I'm happy

Favorite Decks to Use: Aromages will always have my heart, but I adore Cyber Angels too! I'm building my Trickstar deck, my Synchron/Stardust deck (just waiting on Dawn of Majesty...), and my Magician Girls deck, too! Fusion, Ritual, Synchro, XYZ, Pendulum, or Link?: Synchros my beloved... but also Ritual Years in fandom: I've been here for just a little over one year now! and I wuv it... I'm never looking back Who am I tagging: no one I'm too shy

#yugioh #ygo tag meme

[machimachilegends]

Disclaimer: Duelists within the anime severely lack in Spell-based Monster Removal, Spell/Trap Destruction, Effect Negation and Continuous Spell/Trap cards that prevent the opponent from performing certain actions since cards are notably more difficult to obtain and faith/morale play a bigger role than luck/deck-building with an abnormal Battle Phase fetish.

Therefore, this list ranking the strongest antagonists in Yu-Gi-Oh! Anime so far will sparsely discuss the flaws of each character's Deck. If you have any questions about my list or want my personal thoughts on anything Yu-Gi-Oh!, feel free to ask. I have nothing but time!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Z-ONE

Has Level 10 Fairy-Type monsters he can normal summon regularly that are impervious to destruction by battle and card effects by normal means with minimal chances of being damaged.

The effects his Timelords possess range from shuffling your opponent's entire GY back to the Deck, dealing 2000+ effect damage instant Life Point recovery should he take damage. The only issue with Deck is the reliance on attacking and average use of one Timelord at a time. While his Continuous Traps over time will eventually disable the opponent from targeting his Timelords and allow him to exceed 20,000 ATK in a flash, his best play is his biggest weakness.

I could go all day explaining the other effects he has after a successful battle, but just know it's essentially a lot of shuffling cards back, returning cards back and burn. He only has one monster that can deal battle damage and that's about it.

And since he still needs to attack, akin to everybody else lower on the list, this is nothing each protagonist and most rivals can't get over, especially in their respective series, despite popular belief saying otherwise -- when Judai can equip Neos with Rainbow Veil or Light Laser to wall you, you know you messed up somewhere.

Zarc / Z-ARC

Fusion, Synchro, Xyz- and to a lesser extent Pendulum barely mean nothing to this guy and his stupendously powerful dragons. Having access to arguably the best Monster Type in the game both in anime and real life, with the added benefit of being Pendulum-based, many fans have very good reasons to hype him up as unbeatable prior to Yu-Gi-Oh! ARC-V's end.

His ultimate monster Z-ARC boasts and grants immunity to the monster effects of the aforementioned Extra Deck Monsters, in addition to the inability to leave the field by normal means similarly to Z-ONE with a whopping 4000 ATK minus the Battle damage immunity.

It may seem underwhelming at first, but this is only the tip of the iceberg. While Zarc cannot mend the course of a Duel through the Battle Phase, he does possess various ways of demoralizing his foes:

His opponents cannot add cards to their hand outside of the Draw Phase or else their effects will be negated and destroyed.

He can negate the effects of Fusion, Synchro and Xyz Monsters and drain them of their attack by performing the same summon on their Turn, with some of them capable of inflicting effect damage, and each dragon that resides in his Extra Deck has other effects ranging between dramatically exceeding their original ATK or mass removal.

His Supreme King Gates translate battle damage and effect damage into Life Points, while the servants in his Main Deck can protect Z-ARC from attacks and act as an unnecessary extra piece of armor amongst other cards.

And did I forget to mention through Astrograph Sorcerer Z-ARC's summon cannot be negated, which almost guarantees the defeat of his opponents with massage effect damage?

I know it all sounds amazing, but truth be told other than the initial summon of Z-ARC, his Deck is very very fragile in the grand scheme due to how susceptible his Deck is to common Monsters, Spells and Traps' targeting and non-targeting effects that have debut throughout the series.

Recall, since most of his cards only work so long as he controls Z-ARC, while someone like Z-ONE may get trolled by Harpie's Pet Phantasmal Dragon or The Regulation of Tribe once in a blue moon, just call-in Dark Necrofear or Destiny HERO Plasma and it all goes downhill from here.

Dartz

As the practical incarnate of the Orichalcos, Dartz features a Deck revolving around its use. Monsters, Spells, Traps: The whole damn Deck.

While most people would like to focus on the Great Leviathan's lack of built in resistances, despite being an INFINITE ATK point monster that essentially prevents you from losing to any form of damage, this slithery-fuck that required countless souls for its revival planned to be summoned with all three layers/forms of the Orichalcos to be in effect. How else did you expect to acquire 10,000+ Life Points to get the dark thing out? Soul Absorption?

To put sum things up, layer one cannot be destroyed (possibly can't be negated, activation-wise), grants all monsters you control 500 extra ATK, practically enables you to treat your Spell/Trap Zones as extra Main Monster Zones and any monsters summoned there cannot be attacked so long as you have a Monster Zone filled, and if-need-be you can move monsters from the Main Monster Zone to the back, although those last two effects go underused.

Layer two takes all the effects of layer one and stacks it with a 500 Life Points gain for every monster you control once per turn and the ability to Tribute a monster you control to destroy an opposing monster.

Still not convinced these layers do much, well how about layer three? Once again it all stacks with the bonus on straight up telling your opponent "No" when they try to affect any of your monsters with a Spell/Trap Effect instantly negating and destroying them on a whim.

Now, we know the glaring hole in all this is the fact Monster Effects can still put in work, but if it's destruction based, you'll be putting all your time into the monsters leading up to the Great Leviathan.

A little sucker (Kyutora) that absorbs that would be inflicted at any time to fuel a stronger golem-like figure (not Gigas but Shunoros) in the Deck should it ever die with a base ATK of whatever was absorbed and two arms that will always be 300+ in ATK or DEF against an opponent's monster (Aristeros & Dexia), a jerk flame gargoyle that will force one of your opponent's monster back in Attack Position and motherfucking Timeater.

Generally speaking, he comes off very mediocre until you realize all he really needs is Mirror Knight Calling to dominate. With those Mirror Knights in conjunction with the Orichalcos he instantly assembles an army of tokens that can battle any monster and come out victorious, since their strength will always match the opposition and survive destruction by removing a single mirror counter that is generated by Mirror Knight Calling at the end of every Turn.

Simply put, he's someone that only gets better with time, unless he has Geh (The Great Leviathan) out. Then he has a solid chance to lose instantly, then again, if he didn't win on the Turn he summoned it, he deserves to lose seeing how he is milling 10 cards per attack from his Infinite ATK monster.

In many ways Zarc is just a better Dartz. For a guy like this, one Gemini Summoned Magical Reflect Slime + protection is all you need.

Don Thousand

Similarly to Z-ONE he comes off very unfair, except he's an offensive behemoth with control over the Overlay Network, opposed to defensive paragon with relative one-shot capabilities like the others. His Deck can be summed up without much need to go into effects, especially with how little we actually see.

Bluntly put, he will start his Turn spitting out 1 through 4 Number Monsters with the same gimmick of doubling their ATK after each attack, easily allowing him to exceed 8000 points of potential battle damage with a built-in Rank-Up play that deals even more lethal damage, essentially making him the true FTK antagonist looming in the back.

Should both attempts fail, he will fall on Number C1000, but that monster really means nothing to any character that possesses no "C" monsters. Rather Number iC1000 is what you really wanted to see. A walking win condition that basically tells your opponent, if you don't attack me, a 100,000 ATK monster you instantly lose the Duel. The only problem here is it can't negate two attacks, and the effect only applies so long as it stands.

Unlike some of the powerhouses higher on the ladder, he at least has Counter Traps, so there's at least some merit why you rarely see YouTubers try to script any Duels with him. Linear af.

I would say the true problem with his Deck/power as a Duelist is the fact he uses a Field Spell to kickstart his FTK's which means any bro like Bastion Misawa could play Curse of the Forbidden Spell and he's a goner. Like, here me out, at least Dartz can still play the game without the Orichalcos.

Bohman

Now, at first I thought Bohman was going to end up stronger than Z-ONE with the blanket Monster Effect negation he had on his Hydradrives when Dueling Blue Maiden, but that turned out to become more nothing more than a dream.

Bohman lacks proper negation for LIGHT & DARK Attributes essentially made Bohman's Deck a very unfocused beatdown strategy like many of the Duelists of the week characters in Link Swarming form, basically trading Majesty's Fiend for Five-Headed Dragon + Wind-Up Rabbit on crack playing dice.

Ignoring his use of Master Storm Access, it's not so much his Hydradrives suck or OTK/FTK potential isn't there- because it is, it's more so everything he does against Playmaker outside of switching dragon heads or rolling some dice (which only sucks irl) can be done better by everyone on the list:

Over 5000 ATK just cause? Check.

Can dominate Battle Phase procedures more than normal? Check.

Inherently prevents adversaries from dealing with monsters via built-in effects? Check.

Can summon more than one powerful monster per turn/Duel if need be? Check.

Safe from most damaging effects? Check.

Counters most of his generation? Check.

Benefits from his opponents' plays somehow? Check.

He's a jack of all trades and master of none but making attributes change with a die. Why he doesn't run DNA Transplant but Half Shut will forever be a mystery in the same world Revolver acquires Imperial Order for the sole purpose of stopping Judgment Arrows.

It sure is a good thing most protagonists/rivals use LIGHT & DARK Attributes over EARTH, WIND, WATER & FIRE or this man would be at the mercy of so many characters. Poor Yusei though.

Nightshroud

Nightshroud's strategies are the utmost straightforward with how it plans to win. Activate Darkness, Set Darkness 1 through 3 + Zero & Infinity, use various Darkness monsters to peep at your Set cards and/or organize them however you like before activating everything between Zero & Infinity.

Darkness 1 destroys up to 3 card your opponent controls based on face-up Darkness traps.

Darkness 2 increase the ATK of one monster you control 1000 to 3000 based on face-up Darkness traps.

Darkness 3 deal 1000 to 3000 per activation based on face-up Darkness traps.

Each of these are Set and randomized in the zones via Darkness (Field Spell) after activation between Zero & Infinity, which means in 2 Turns if the correct Darkness monster is on the field, that's a clean ceiling of 6000 effect damage if Darkness Neosphere is present.

Through these various Darkness Traps controlling the cards present on the field at a time makes it easy to disrupt characters from summoning their strongest monsters via Contact Fusion, Synchro, Xyz and Link Summoning, making the monsters he pumps up through Darkness 2 like Darkness Destroyer game enders via Battle Damage, which would make many come to the conclusion he should rank higher on the list. The main problem with Darkness is he doesn't showcase any further Spells/Traps and anything like Denko Sekka can shut him down in an instant.

Nightshroud's combo is highly susceptible to card destruction, despite boasting some of the finest at his best and other than that poor RNG styled Field Spell.

To cut things short, anything that can't be destroyed by Traps or benefits from destruction will only have to worry about effect damage or higher ATK. And considering how badly Nightshroud needs to go first, he's not only the slowest boss character but has the worst matchup potential, especially against other bosses.

Please don't tell him about Legendary Six Samurai - Shi En or Naturia Rosewhip OR Mister Alister's hmm... I don't know... Oh yeah! ROYAL DECREE!!!

I would say he has it the worse, but it's understandable since he- outside of helping others mend the darkness in their hearts never created/announced anything notably new mid Duel. Very respectable for a skeleton man.

#ooc #outofgata #yugioh dm #yugioh gx #yugioh 5ds #yugioh zexal #yugioh arc v #yugioh vrains

[leam1983]

Having Weird Dreams, Lately...

I sort of feel like they're part of an overarching narrative, seeing as some elements keep coming back; but they're also mostly disjointed and subject to the usual dreamlike nonsense ranging from slow fades to jagged cuts. Still, I've arranged them by theme:

My Subconscious Being Years Late: that's nothing new. As far as my inner cockles are concerned, I should still call the folks every time I'm planning on heading out for a drink on my own, even as I near my forties. In my dreams, I still depend on them for transportation, and frequently arrive in my first setting by means of my father's black Corolla and its back seat. Once I'm settled in, however, I start walking around on my own. I even take the bus in my dreams, which I've always loathed doing IRL.

My Disability Being a Non-Issue: I usually lose my cane in my dreams, and never care to remember where I misplaced it. I sprint across streets, jaywalk across intersections, and even manage to crawl on all fours at a decent pace. I'll chalk all this up to video games and my levels of disability representation being close to non-existent across the medium. Power fantasies are a thing, but weakness fantasies tend to be less of a vector for AAA design documents...

Museums. Lots of Museums: I really don't know why, honestly. The last one was some sort of weird exhibition on the history of Japanese electronics, packed with Denon and Matsushita consumer goods that would be a better fit in a Mamorou Oshii design doc for an unproduced Cyberpunk anime. I remember a little Denon Hi-Fi system that was about the size of a toaster, and had a little robot of sorts, tethered to a horizontal rail, below the tape deck. Play a song, and the little robot would sort of boogie along following the BPM of whatever was being played.

Another area had a wing covering the supposed history of game consoles, but nothing in the hardware being featured felt familiar. A few "consoles" were strangely anthropomorphic in design, and the last one at the end of the corridor was just this undefined... thing waiting under some sort of tarp. Something twitched under the canvas as I got closer.

Leaving an Event with People I Don't Know: I guess my subconscious is more entreprising than I consciously am, or more daring. One of my museum dreams ended with my speaking with the curator of the exhibit, the lone, single, anthro pig in a sea of otherwise boilerplate humans. Sort of well-dressed although the details elude me, clearly educated - but with a fixation on milk-based cocktails and White Russians that would only make sense later.

Naturally, instead of heading back home with my parents to book-end the first theme, my dream self just declares I'll grab a cab in the morning, after spending the night at What's-His-Face's place. That's in-keeping with the one, single one-night stand I've allowed myself insofar, an event that's apparently been important on the subconscious level. I always end up in a dingy flat full of people that remind me of how much the Beat Generation's poets marked a good chunk of my twenties, with varyingly friendly and varyingly psychotic mishmashes of Allen Ginsberg, Jack Kerouac and William Boroughs.

I soon realize after a few hours of sped-up debauchery that this isn't Mr. Curator's house, and he takes me to an equally dingy flat - but not without first spiriting two gallons of milk in plastic bags out of nowhere.

Fetishes I'm Not Conscious Of: for three nights now, Curator Pig Guy's idea of sex involves guzzling two gallons' worth of milk while having me hug him and massage his belly. He never spills any and manages to moan while drinking, occasionally freeing one of his hands to guide one of mine to various tender spots along his chest and abdomen. He acts like this is germane to sweeping love declarations, and I'm increasingly disturbed by his sudden attachment. It's usually at that point that the dream turns uneasy, bordering on being a nightmare.

On some nights, I try and escape only for my attempts to end with more sexual undertones. While the act itself never takes place, dream logic has me approach the pig's habit of pinning me to the ground as being penetrative in nature. I'm occasionally aroused, occasionally disturbed. I can't make out what he's saying, but it's clear that he wants me far, far more than I want him. There was some interest on my side, but I'm left feeling like Pig Fella skipped a few beats.

It's at that point that I transform into a pig anthro, a chestnut-colored-one, and suddenly have a behavior-related 180. I suddenly find myself as amorous as he is, as if the character's weird brand of attachment were a contact-based high, and typically wake up within a few moments of release.

The thing is, I've never gone for sexual anthro art. I've never gone for sploshing, I'm not tweaked by milk or semen in ways that would fit the overall theme. What the Hell, Subconscious?

Family Acting Out-of-Character: imagine having a Post-Doctorate aunt who manifests in your dreams as having the ability to handle live power lines with her bare hands, and to react to thousands of volts coursing through her like it's the sort of static shock you'd get on a doorknob.

Said aunt is assuredly not reckless and she would not treat failures in the local power grid as an excuse to fuck around. Again, what the fuck.

Repetitions: it feels like a part of me is keeping track of all this, seeing as Pig Guy shows up once a night, and mentions he wants to pick up "where we left off". Seeing as I can't seem to make up my mind between being disgusted or actually pulled in, I'm never able to assert control. Something tells me fellatio's on the menu, as targeted as the character's own fetishes seem to be.

I don't know how I feel about that.

All of this is despite 8 hours of sleep per day, a decent routine, a bit of exercise and one hour of meditation before falling asleep. I'm also not used to working while having characters or concepts from Dreamland mill about in the back of my mind.

Maybe I'll figure out how much the Weirdo Museum charges, tonight.

#dreams #cw: sex discourse #cw: intercourse #odd motifs