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vceeukenlwml-blog · 5 years

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How To Instagram Viewer In 15 Minutes And Still Look Your Best

If you know someone bearing in mind a private Instagram account, and desire to view that person's photos without having to follow them or acquire approval, after that PrivateInsta has the solution! PrivateInsta is a one of a nice foster that allows you to view the private Instagram photos of any user. all you habit to pull off to acquire started is enter a username and click 'Submit'. You will after that be directed to a page afterward all of that user's photos. You are not breaking any of Instagram's terms of facilitate by using PrivateInsta. This site is currently in beta and will all the time be improved. This product is not official view private instagram recognized by Instagram. As you can look from the video above, PrivateInsta is the single-handedly abet on the web that lets you actually view private Instagram accounts. taking into consideration higher than 3 years of support and experience, we allow you to view more photos than any of our competitors. It doesn't how to see private instagram accounts business if you want to view your connections private account, your teacher's account, or even your ex's account, we've got you covered. get started today by entering a username at the summit of this page and clicking the 'Submit' button. We've all been in that situation. You find an account next an fascinating profile describe and you desire to look at the on fire of their photos, but their account is set to private. If you try to request to view their photos they will most likely fall your request. Without PrivateInsta you would just have to accept the fact that you will never be skilled to view their pictures.

My View Starting Points

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View Private Instagram

If you search for how to see someones private Instagram profiles subsequently you will find out that there are a few websites which are exploitation that there is a tool which can make you view private profiles & pictures of Instagram users. Genuinely speaking, its just a hoax or and quite impossible business to happen as of now, but still, there are some websites which create you recognize that yeah its doable and its practicing currently, in view of that dont agree to them. appendix This article has no ambition of promoting a user to stalk users profile, and allocation posts are either for personal or trailer purposes. Many how to see private instagram accounts get caught taking place taking into account these websites which but the stop will have the funds for you nothing except sadness. In reality, they unaided generate gain from this, that is why they are making you take something impossible as a result that they can earn child maintenance from you. consequently past giving you the in-depth defense as to why you cannot view a Private Profile, here are the two types of accounts on Instagram. Public and choice one is Private. The public profile is where everyone can follow you and look your posts. It is simple to locate a person and follow him/her to get their posts and know their activities. In Private account, there are a few restrictions where lonely a fixed people can view your profile. In the combat of Private accounts, one can solitary be viewed if the person approves the request of the follower. The good news is that now weve got a bigger solution for this. total the like ways to accomplish out a private Instagram account. Bad news if you desire to view your crushs profile as the reply here is a big NO. In reality, there is no such software which can incite you to view someones private Instagram profile, thus truly speaking you will never acquire any real software or any tool that will permit you to see Instagram private profiles. However, there are great quantity of software that put you in doubt and trouble, then again of wasting period upon these sites we select you to not take on in something which is impossible. The answer is quite straightforward, they getting child support in the same way as you download their software or install it. As I searched for the tool or software which would back in viewing Instagram Private Profile, I found quite a few sites. These sites which are easy to use become more complicated as and past you get fervent to know nearly a private user. I will lead you through the steps I had to follow with I had to view a private profile picture. First, I had to Google and abandoned to see that there are such tools view private instagram welcoming to view private profile practicable or not? Guess what! Some sites offered me to view the private profiles. I entered the website and was quite impressed taking into consideration the artifice the site was built. I entered the username/URL of the person who has a private profile. next step is they question me to confirm whether I am a human or not. Some sites question to definite survey whereas some ask you to download apps to view a private profile.So did it incite me? NO.They did not. But these sites seemed to be daring and at the same period back visitors to associate in their websites and download some meaningless and paid apps.As and gone you enter the username of a private profile, it asks you to unqualified the survey for some advertisements listed upon their website which will support you in viewing the private profile.

Reference

youtube

There are no shortcuts to everything be it in warfare of earning grant or viewing a private profile. You have to put up with specific procedures to save it legal. The page that says that come up with the money for you in viewing the private pictures entre terribly, and the grammar used in those pages are way worse in view of that how could one drop for this? How realize you expect someone to break the code of a private profile and make it visible for viewing? Of course we know that not all hackers are foreigners, but as you visit their contact us page, you will declaration that their solution quarters is USA. appropriately here we have someone promising you an effectively illegal product, potentially lying}how to see private instagram accountsnot quite where they are from and who doesnt have a perfect grasp of the language. By now it is helpfully understood that no such software or tool can incite you view a profile picture. correspondingly I recommend you to get into them in person and question for them to follow. with if you find any such tool in far ahead or have questions once regards to this article, mention them in the explanation section below. Clicking on an public notice would urge on the site generate revenue, this is how they earn and make child support by fooling people and grab attention subsequent to their headline. Some sites ask you to have the funds for your username and password to generate their Instagram Private Profile. This will anyhow guide to hacking as the details you meet the expense of are stored in their database, and this will be used to bump their own or someone elses followers. As you final it, they acquire grant from you because you just completed public notice surveys for them. realize not acquire unhappy as there are other ways to view a private profile (No Hacking, No Tool) You can acquire for that reason many snapchat actions which are lovely legitimate and genuine. Here is a little trick that might arrive in understandable to you.

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dylansdavis · 5 years

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It has taken 8 years but i think I have finally come to terms with why i broke up my only relationship.

I used to claim that I only saw her as an object and didnt want to hurt her. This is what I told myself to feel better.

I said she was too much like my sister. This was because of how she acted and how I have a type based on my "love" for my sister. I adored my sister, I put her on a pedestal and wanted to always be with her. I was possessive. Then my sister went to college and I loosened up. My ex had similarities in likes and quirks, but she was in no way my sister.

That she was only with me to get back at an ex or she lost a dare. This was bullshit, I knew it to be bullshit. Intrusive thoughts and i knew better.

That my religion was fragile and I didnt like her attitude towards it. While it is true I was offended at times about her attitude towards Christianity I had similar attitudes at times and couldnt fault her for this. I wanted to vilify her and justify my break up. This was a shit move on my part.

Or my depression was getting worse and didnt want her to have to deal with it. Depression did play a role, but it wasnt the deciding factor.

As much as I'd like that last to be true it is only a part of the story. I was scared. I was 17, I got my first girlfriend, about to go to college, and my depression wasnt getting any better. I broke it off because I was scared of every possible negative outcome, teen pregnancy, cheating, suicide, car accident, being abusive... I was so scared because I had a temper and my medicine can make it worse. There were times I snapped at her and I am so scared of being abusive, verbally and mentally.

I am afraid of being manipulative. I have this paranoia where every word i speak and action I take are manipulative. I want to be the center of attention so I try to manipulate events. Even this post feels manipulative, what am I trying to accomplish with it. Having her see this? Having us get back together? Having other people judge me so that I can justify self harm? I dont know why I'm writing this, I could stop right here. I could delete it. And even going on about this feels manipulative.

I chose to break up because I was scared of who I would become. I was scared because at the time I didnt see the value in myself and I dont know how someone else could. I was scared of dealing with my problems and her problems. I was scared because I had no idea what I was doing.

I was scared because I was not emotionally or mentally ready to be in a relationship. But that isnt the key factor, the reason I broke up with my ex is I was scared of communication.

I was scared that everything was an argument. That I would have to convey how I feel. That either of us would use each others words to hurt each other.

I should have told her how I felt, that I cared about her but didnt know what that meant anymore. I should have asked her if she wanted to be with me even when I was a mess. I could have explained how there were things I didnt like either what she did or said. Even now I'm making it all about me.

I never asked her how love felt for her. I could have asked her if there was anything I could do to improve upon. Things she didnt like about me or wish I'd stopped doing.

I was scared of the relationship, scared of intimacy, scared of communication, scared of the future, scared of her, and scared of myself. I was afraid, and I still am.

I dont know if I'm ready for a relationship. But i want one. I want to try being intimate. Try communicating. Try everything about being with someone. The good and the bad.

I will always be scared. I'm not sorry about that. I am sorry that I was too scared to admit being scared that I painted my relationship or ex in a bad light.

What I am not scared of is who I am today. I am a better person. I like who I am. I dont know who I'd be had we stayed together. And I dont know if she would like who she is.

If my ex were to ask me if I regret ending the relationship. I would respond verily. Which was an inside joke between us. But I wouldn't change anything because both of us grew into who we needed to be.

She and I shared a love for Wicked. And the song For Good comes to mind.

"I've heard it said that people come into our lives, for a reason. Bringing something we must learn. And we are led to those who help us grow if we let them, and we help them in return"

I am writing this not for her. I am writing this for me. This has caused me to think and finally verbalize how I feel. It honestly feels like a weight has lifted. It took me 8 years because I was scared to admit all this. I am and always will be scared, but i am trying not to let that fear control me.

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canadastartupblog · 5 years

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Actor and comedian Jerry Seinfeld is no stranger to success. An Emmy, a Golden Globe and several Screen Actors Guild Awards are a few of the accomplishments to his name, not to mention one of the most iconic television series in the 20th century.

So what’s Seinfeld’s secret? How did he manage to achieve such sizable goals?

With this simple maxim: Don’t break the chain.

Using an old-school wall calendar, Seinfeld started drawing Xs through each day in which he accomplished his goal of joke-writing. As Seinfeld explained to an aspiring comedian:

“For each day that I do my task of writing, I get to put a big red X over that day. After a few days, you’ll have a chain. Just keep at it and the chain will grow longer every day. You’ll like seeing that chain, especially when you get a few weeks under your belt. Your only job next is to not break the chain.”

Those consecutive Xs lead to momentum: the force that allows something — like motivation — to grow stronger or faster as time passes. Momentum, however, faces an equal and opposite force: friction. In science, friction means the resistance caused when one object moves at a different rate than another.

In our everyday lives, friction means any one of an endless number of possible distractions: long meetings, cluttered inboxes, chatty colleagues, social media and more. Though we can’t eliminate those sources of friction entirely, it’s crucial to learn how to manage them. Because if you can’t manage friction, it will slow your momentum like lead in a balloon. But if you can, you position yourself to achieve your most ambitious business and career goals. And it all comes down to sustaining momentum.

Why sustained momentum pays off (big)

From age 32 to 44, Warren Buffett increased his net worth by 1,257 percent. In the next 12 years, he grew it by 7,268 percent. How did he achieve these extraordinary results? By leveraging an economic phenomenon known as the compound effect, whereby consistent, incremental changes result in fundamental changes over time.

Beginning at age 32, Buffett started building a chain of investments — and he never stopped. This sustained momentum created a compound effect, which for Buffett, yielded massive wealth.

Sure, some people hit it big once. But a more likely route to success is by committing to the long-haul and trusting that things will add up over time. As Gary Keller and Jay Papsan, authors of The One Thing, write:

“Success is sequential, not simultaneous.”

This mindset is crucial for building a business, especially if you, like me, choose to go the bootstrapped route. There are also some interesting psychological effects to keep in mind if you want to increase your likelihood of achieving success.

Research shows: Seeing is achieving

Analyzing data from Olympic and Sectional swim competitions, researchers have found that athletes swim faster when swimming toward (versus away from) the end where the finish line is located.

It’s because when we can visualize a goal — in the case of competitive swimmers, a finish line — we exert more effort to reach that goal. Experts call this the goal visualization effect. Of particular interest for entrepreneurs, managers can use this effect to enhance consumer goal pursuit and motivate employees to improve performance.

For example, my company, JotForm makes user-friendly online forms. We use demos to show customers how our forms can help them achieve their personal or business goals, and in doing so, we motivate them towards those goals — and to use our products.

Similarly, when we perceive progress toward a goal, we’re more likely to complete the goal, and faster. Experts call this the endowed progress effect. To demonstrate, researchers Joseph C. Nunes and Xavier Drèze examined how loyalty programs motivate consumers to purchase more.

As a location for this sophisticated experiment, they chose your friendly, neighborhood car wash. Customers were given cards where they would receive a stamp for each car wash. After collecting eight stamps, they could redeem a free sud session. Here’s the rub: some cards had spaces for eight stamps and others had spaces for 10, with two spots already stamped.

The researchers found that 34 percent of those with the 10-stamp cards redeemed their ninth free wash, versus 19 percent with the empty, eight-stamp cards. This shows that customers who perceived they were making progress from the get-go were more likely to progress toward their goal — even if it’s just a free wash.

With these psychological factors in mind, I’ve come up with a process for maintaining laser focus and sustaining momentum. It’s helped me to grow JotForm to 140 employees and 4.5 million users — without any VC funding. Hopefully, it can help you, too.

Develop long-term, goal-supporting habits

Every morning, I start my day by opening a blank document and writing for two hours uninterrupted. No emails, no calls, no alerts — just me, my keyboard and whatever’s on my mind. Usually, it begins as barely coherent, stream-of-consciousness prattle. But soon enough, I’m fleshing out recent issues and developing new ideas.

This daily habit has helped me to sustain momentum and continue to work toward my overarching goals — building a company with a healthy culture and offering users a seemingly simple, but game-changing product. Like hitting the gym as soon as I wake up, I do it even when I don’t feel like it. And that’s the beauty of habits — you don’t need motivation to complete them. Regardless of your mindstate on any particular day, you can continue adding to an unbroken chain.

2. Choose tools to keep you on track

If you want to manage friction and sustain your momentum, you’ll need some tools to help keep you on track. While Jerry Seinfeld’s tool-of-choice was a wall calendar, these days we’ve got a plethora of handy options to choose from.

For example, you may find that the modern equivalent to Seinfeld’s tool — a digital calendar — is useful for sticking with your daily habits. On the other hand, an analog paper planner can offer a range of benefits as well — from increased mindfulness to less device-related distractions.

And if you find yourself unable to overcome the temptation to check your smartphone or browse the internet, first, give yourself a break — you’re not alone in this struggle. Then, try downloading a tool like Freedom, which blocks distracting apps and websites so you can get more done.

Whether it’s an old-school alarm clock or a new-age productivity app, choose the tools that work best for you.

3. Track progress with outcome-based standards.

Every link you add to your chain should be based on a specific outcome — not just time elapsed.

So, for example, if you’re trying to learn a new language, don’t count the number of hours you study grammar — instead, focus on the first time you’re able to hold your own in a conversation. Because that’s how you’ll know if you’re truly progressing. That’s when you’ll be able to (metaphorically) mark an X on your calendar.

That said, outcomes aren’t the only thing to consider. To the extent possible, you should aim to enjoy the process, too.

4. You’re in it for the long-haul, so be reasonable.

If the purpose of our chains is to achieve a lofty goal, then we can think of each link as a sub-goal. It’s crucial to give yourself a reasonable amount of time to work through these links.

For starters, maybe your chain is currently your side hustle, in which case the lion’s share of your day is dedicated to your day job. Whatever the case, we can’t always dedicate a huge portion of our time to completing one goal. That’s why your timeline should be reasonable. Otherwise, you’re more likely to get discouraged and break the chain.

I’m a big advocate of taking breaks. Whether it’s a short walk after lunch or a visit to my family’s olive farm, I find myself notably refreshed and motivated after stepping away from the office. I’ve come up with some of my best ideas during these “down” times.

I wouldn’t have been able to build the company as it exists today had I not given myself a reasonable timeline to grow, and progress through each milestone. As Seinfeld’s rise shows: you don’t go from open mic nights to Emmy winner overnight. It takes time, daily effort and sustained momentum — and a little humor never hurt either.

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sharionpage · 5 years

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Who Controls Your Thoughts?

The Self Improvement Blog | Self Esteem | Self Confidence

We are always thinking. The conscious mind never shuts up during the time it’s awake. So the big question is, “Do you control your thoughts or do they control you? Who Controls your thoughts?

Who controls your thoughts?

You are invited out to dinner next week with a group of well-known people in your community most of whom you have not met but know about through the news media. Of course, you readily accept. You check out a couple of them on the Internet, learning about their education and their professional and personal accomplishments so you can relate to them in conversation. Initially, you are excited about it and then your thoughts begin to ramble.

Ideas begin to creep in, ideas such as:

What can I possibly wear that will look good enough? I’d better get something new.

Will they like me?

What if I can’t carry on my part of the conversation?

Maybe they will realize that I’m not on their level?

What if I embarrass myself?

I shouldn’t have accepted.

IWhat if I don’t fit in?

I don’t think I can do this.

They will see how out of place I really am.

I don’t want to make a fool of myself.

…and so on.

Notice how your thoughts have changed from questions to statements. The day of the dinner, you decide you don’t feel well and you call in your regrets to the person who invited you. This is a little extreme but the scenario is played out frequently in any number of situations—perhaps consciously, perhaps not.Had you focused on the positive outcomes of the situation you could have attended, enjoyed the dinner and ended up with new acquaintances and possibly new friends who could enrich your life.

Let’s look at some other similar scenarios:

You are studying for an advanced degree and have an important exam to take. Your fear is that you will freeze and your mind will draw a blank at each question. You begin to doubt your mastery of the material and, even though you have spent hours in preparation your thoughts have declared you a failure before you even start the test. In fact, you have set yourself up for failure in a situation that you could ordinarily handle with ease.

You are asked to give some serious consideration to writing a book or a series of articles. You ask a couple of friends what they think and you get both positive and negative feedback. By the time you need to make a decision and give your response, the negative input has won and you say, “Thanks, but the answer is no.” Perhaps you would have written a best seller but you’ll never know.

Another scenario or two

You visit an online dating site and receive a number of responses. As you consider each one you decide that none of them work for you. You do this, not because you have good information that lets you know they are not a good match for you, but because your thoughts led you to believe they wouldn’t like you. What have you missed by that assumption?

You didn’t sleep well last night or the night before so today your thoughts dwell on the possibility that you won’t sleep again tonight. You have set yourself up not to sleep and, no surprise, you have another restless night. There are steps you can take to make a good night’s sleep a possibility and one of them is to manage your thoughts.

You are told that the boss wants to see you first thing in the morning. You spend the evening and night worrying that he has a negative review to give you, or you are going to get a change in your job, or that you may be getting laid off or fired. By the time of the meeting, you have worked yourself into a frenzy with your negative thinking. The fact is that the boss called you in to tell you are getting a promotion accompanied by a raise. You go in tired and with a negative attitude based simply on your own negative thoughts.

Think about your own thoughts

Think about your own thoughts. Where do they lead you? Do you let them help you soar to new heights? Or do you allow them to control your mind, your attitudes, your emotions, your desires, your decisions in a negative way? Do you allow your thoughts to sabotage you and keep you from taking necessary risks and therefore from enjoying some remarkable success? I’m not talking about situations in which “no” is the best answer or recognizing that a situation truly is not the best for you. I’m talking about allowing your thoughts to take over and influence a decision in an unfortunate and unfavorable way

If the answer is “yes” what can you do about it? While this is probably not new information but simply a reminder, there are several things you can do.

Things you can do

Become aware of your thinking—serve as your own “thought monitor.” When you notice a trend toward the negative, take control. Watch for patterns. Awareness is key.

When you don’t have all your facts, gather information that allows you to make intelligent, informed decisions. This will help you avoid jumping to false conclusions based on negative input from your own thoughts.

Develop a pattern of positive thinking. a. Write positive affirmations that are realistic for you and use them on a regular basis. b. Develop a habit of journaling on a daily basis about those things you appreciate, are grateful for and that give you joy. For example, write down 5 things daily that you are grateful for or that you appreciate. It doesn’t need to be a long, time-consuming exercise. This starts or ends your day on an upbeat note. c. Look for the possible positive outcomes from negative experiences. What did you learn?

Become more aware of your own strengths, ideas and beliefs.

Remember

Remember that thoughts are things and they create. Can you name one thing in existence that didn’t start out as a thought? Me neither.

In his book, As a Man Thinketh, James Allen states, “All that you accomplish or fail to accomplish with your life is the direct result of your thoughts.”

Do your thoughts create joy in your life or do they create suffering?

Who controls your thoughts?

Who Controls Your Thoughts? published first on https://bitspiritspace.tumblr.com/

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dontthink · 6 years

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5 years

I hate hate hate that question. Because I truly never know...but my response of where I wanted to be has always been pretty much the same without having anything truly defined.

My life has had many twists, turns and unexpected outcomes to adhere to that question.

31 - 2014 - Live alone in a spacious 1 bedroom. Steady job that has me traveling the states and sometimes the world. I get to suffice many things I enjoy. Both my yearn to design (though not as much as I would like) and my tech side I get to do everyday. No two days are the same and I get to socialize not only with my great fellow co-workers, but clients and delegates. Among many other little positive factors. The negatives are the same, like in any job.

26 - 2009 - Was let-go from a Real Estate company which I despised and hated (blessing in disguise)...or at least it ended that way (even with the money I was able to save up and earn), because of the corruption and greed, petty and shallow motherfuckers that were in and running it. All that people thought I was a part of because of how long I've been working with them (longer than written here). It left me unemployed for the next two years, where I took the time to go back to school and focus on getting back to what I truly loved, DESIGNING. Along, with bettering my lifestyle and livelyhood and becoming a better physical & mental version of myself.

21 - 2004 - Last year of college. Still living at home (moved out the following year) Graduated a half-year early. Couldnt find design gigs...because I did not go to an art school...went to a business school with a degree in Advertising, wanting to design. I AM SELF-TAUGHT DESIGNER. Decided fuck this, let me go see the world. Went to the furtherst corner I could for 3 months. Came back, 3 more months no work. Finally a break. 3 JOBS! (I am a work-horse). Full Day shift 8-6. Night shift 7-1am. Weekend shift 9-6. I did it all because I enjoyed designing. I lose myself in it. I always have...especially when it just clicks. Still...the same negatives, like in any job. Why I took a job in real estate at 25, was because it gave my the opportunity to finally become my own and not struggle check to check.

16 - 1999 - What am I, a sophomore/junior in HS. At that time I was drawing and doodling, but because of certain influences, I got into the world 'business' and the career possibilities that existed there, such as Trading in the Stock Market. I was also working at Hollywood Video, grinding.

11 - 1994 - I dont recall. Was this when AOL first came out? This is where the world of tech was brought to me. And the jump off point of me wanting to deal with computers and hacking and etc.

THE FUTURE 5

36 - 2019 - FUCK. I dont know...and I am not sure I want to.

Of course, there are many factors within each of those 5 years, where there are different types of turmoil, defeat, uprise, hope, and accomplishments, all which have brought me to be where I am today.

Maybe not the place where I thought I would be. But where I thought I would be at 25 was married and on my way to having a kid. That in itself was an influence of the 3 girls I grew up with and thats because pretty much every adult I knew had that pattern themselves.

I have people in my life that have always seemed to have their shit together. Have seemingly made all the right moves, at the right time, to give them the 'picture perfect' type of life..or close to it. Something anyone would be happy to have.

Then I have a whole other side. 'The Lost'. They are they people who have somehow derailed in life. They are not where they should be or want to be.

I dont fall into either of those categories. I fall into both.

I dont believe anyone out there truly has their shit together. I dont think anyone really has a plan. They might have goals, which can help steer a plan into action.

When someone tells me to get my shit together (even myself), it pisses me off.

When someone thinks I am lost (even myself), it pisses me off.

When someone thinks I am doing better than someone else (even myself), it pisses me off.

Though, maybe I have been going about it all wrong. Maybe, I should have been more proactive instead of reactive (something I have been working on recently), maybe I should've kept grinding

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chrismurman · 6 years

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How Do You Know When To Step Away?

There aren’t many people from college I keep up with anymore. Just a few close buddies that I spent almost every day of life with for a few years. After graduation, we would call often, even do group calls to laugh at each other. Then when one of us would get engaged or have a kid, we’d trek to their hood for some fellowship.

Now, there’s a group text where we share what’s going on when something needs to be shared, coordinate a rare meetup, or make fun of each other’s teams during the NFL season.

When we were in each other’s lives in our 20s, we spent a ton of energy around hanging out. There was a huge return on the investment because I have lifelong friends that would come bail me out at the drop of a hat if I asked.

I think.

To spend that much time on them now would be much more work for very little return. We have significant others, kids, pets, jobs, and lives to lead in other cities. If we finally did a weekend trip somewhere it would be much more expensive than drinking cheap beer at the lake in college. And the morning after now would be much more painful.

What I’m describing is an aspect of the law of diminishing returns. [1] It’s a fairly simple concept and refers to a point at which the level of profits or benefits gained is less than the amount of money or energy invested. At some point in time of my relationship with these gents, we all realized it wasn’t going to be like it was.

The same could be said for the time we spend coaching our teams, programs, and leaders today.

It’s a harsh thing to communicate. The minute I meet a new group of people to partner with on the road to agility I’m trying to put myself out of a job. That means I have to immediately prepare them for the day I won’t be around. I rarely have the exact date in mind when I say this, but we all know it’s true.

My time with teams will at some point need to come to an end.

In the beginning, everyone has hope (or less skepticism than usual) for a better way of working. They haven’t gotten tired of the sound of my voice. My analogies and cliches are new. I might even bring treats to the initial kick off. That never lasts though, and they will eventually have their fill.

Which led me to explore the concept of understanding when you’ve reached that tipping point and how to best handle that transition.

Just as a caveat, this may not apply to all of you. You may be a full-time employee assigned to a team or group of teams. You may have contract lengths to adhere to as a consultant. Or you just may like the area you are working in. I’ll add something at the end for those of you as well.

Avoid the awkward with better up front expectations.

One of the most important parts of my job is sitting down with leadership early on to establish our working agreement. This includes several items, depending on the engagement. Most importantly, I want to know what they think I should accomplish and how to handle it if I disagree with some their assessment after onboarding.

Often, the objective includes phrases like, “teach us this framework, then step us through a few iterations.” It could be to assist them with a re-org as they build agile teams from scratch. I might even be fortunate enough to teach leadership some things about viewing our work differently before moving to teams.

The struggle is by the time I show up most clients are chomping at the bit for me to get started and want to breeze past the initial working agreement. There are several reasons for this, which probably merit a post on just this topic. Just know you can’t push past this.

Defining the endpoint may be difficult, but establishing the end point is key. I’ve often been sitting in leadership meetings with this awkward feeling. Everybody is asking me how things are going. Discussion centers around the topic of how do we know if we are accomplishing our goals. If I had done a better job of establishing expectations earlier in the process, I would be better equipped to handle this discussion.

You won’t know if it’s time to push the baby birds out of the nest on unless you know where you want them to go. If you want to read more on this, Jason Little’s book is a great place to start.

They need me to step back from them, but they may need to step away from you too.

Let’s say you’ve established a great working agreement with leadership, including healthy outcomes for the team or program. Then comes the actual execution. Even the most experienced coach can struggle to accomplish tasks with some groups. The more entrenched the culture and frozen middle, the harder the transformation can be.

Often, the task is too much for a single person.

What I often hear from colleagues (and myself) will be to blame the other side for the challenges. “They’re just not ready for transformation,” is the common refrain. All of that might be true, but what I’ve had to learn the hard way is the team’s problem might be staring me back in the mirror.

As a guide through the buzzword of transformation, all I have is tools and a few quirky stories to tell teams. I do not have a magic wand.

When I notice that teams aren’t responding to me like they used to, I try not to lie to myself. There could be a personality conflict with me, a difference in approach. Maybe I made a scrum master feel disregarded, or a project manager marginalized. It could be the just won’t want to play along. Regardless, the best thing I can do in this situation is own my part in things.

If it comes to a point where they would respond to someone else, made its best to be honest with leadership. Its hard doing that, but if we really care about their journey then we should create the best environment. One that doesn’t include me for the moment.

Involve them with identifying the tipping point.

Change plans are a necessary evil with my work, one that I’m not very good at. It could be my lack of training in the area of Organizational Change Management practices. Or I’m stubborn and just want to tell funny stories in workshops instead. Either way, plans help everyone feel better about the work we do.

What I find disconcerting is the propensity to hide them subconsciously instead of just make them as visible as our product backlogs. Just like a well written epic, I find writing the objectives with leadership on cards and decomposing them in front of the team a healthy practice.

If everyone is walking the wall of transformation just like our other boards, everyone comes to the realization at the same time that we are reaching our tipping point of diminishing returns.

Another awesome tool I’ve had the chance to participate in is transformation demos. Just like the working software version, we want to iterate our way through the process of change and show our work along the way. I’ve seen leadership benefit from breaking up the work into smaller chunks and having a conversation about how the work is going.

By seeing transformation in smaller chunks, it’s easier to see when we are getting close to our definition of done.

What if you want or need to keep going?

For all the reasons I described earlier, and many more, you might not have an opportunity to fire yourself. You would like to find a way to stick around, but you can see all the tell tale signs mentioned above. What should you do?

First off, have an open and honest with leadership and acknowledge where you are. If you’ve been stepping everyone through the process, it will seem more natural to want to help evolve your role or swap things up.

You can also stay put but shift into more of a mentor with your area of work. Find ways to elevate others into your position. The learning you gain as a mentor far will pair with your first hand experience.

Also, explore more areas of transformation in your program or team. While it may seem like you’re trying to squeeze blood out of a turnip at first, people are usually up for coming up with more ways they want to change things up. Add to your transformation backlog just like you would a product backlog.

Regardless of how close you are to the tipping point, just know that it’s coming. And it’s okay to reach the point of diminishing returns of your coaching. The more proactive you can be as you near it, the more prepared you will be for the next stage of change.

And yours.

Yes, I did a lot of research into the law. It is commonly used by economists to describe that if I increase the amount of energy I spend on something I will get less in return. That would apply somewhat differently to this article, but it can apply loosely. Dont come at me with your pitchforks, Internet.

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survivor-themyscira-blog · 6 years

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https://cdn.dtbrownseeds.co.uk/product-images/op/z/19780z.jpg

FUCK U

JORDAN

I WASNT YOUR LEAK

LOOK WHERE IT GOT YOU

GOD DAMMIT!!

Like literally Logan, was like "you were the honestly honest one".

And Toph's all like "we can't trust emily."

And Jaidens like "im so happy you brought me back AND took out pines." And like mad n ian are like "alliance needs to be strong."

And yeah I haven't spoken to anyone else.

But im sure they're like "damn kai was hot in that tribal."

Or something similar.

So Jordan Pines, you are so very welcome to join my hall of trophy votes. The idol I played wasn't mine but Kai's. Kai transferred it to me because Emily told us you were gunning for me with swapped antiope. QQ You join names such as Seamus, Brandan, Tyler, and Catfish Alexa on my stuffed and mounted

I’m so scared Logan is suddenly being so nice to me he messaged me like hey love and then started telling me to drink fluids and stay healthy and I’m scared he’s plotting against me. And Toph is the complete opposite. He’s being flat out rude to me sending me snapchats of him flipping me off and telling everyone that I can’t be trusted and it’s SO RUDE like wtf I know they can’t but like don’t tell them that!

ok so this puzzle is literally destroying my sanity

i shit you not i turned on GHOST MODE for this motherfucker what was i thinking??? "GEE I REALLY WONDER WHAT THE FUCK THIS PUZZLE MIGHT LOOK LIKE, AND GHOST MODE WILL SURELY HELP ME PUT IT TOGETHER"

god no wonder its called the hell puzzle, i never wanna see this spiky shit again

I feel like the past 24 hours or so have been a lot of “firsts” for me. This is the first time in a Tumblr game I’ve ever been voted out, and later returned due to a twist!! This is the first time I’ve beaten Jordan Pines in an individual challenge :~) (my favorite accomplishment). This is not, however, the first time I’ve felt like a complete outcast! Fuck!!

Basically, I join the merge tribe after vanquishing the Goliath to my David. I expected triumphant cheers of happiness that mister Pines was finally eliminated, but there was nothing more than a sigh at my entrance. Nobody even initially congratulated me.

So here we are, hours after I got back into the game. I guess it’s been almost a full day since then, actually, but I put my absolute all into this competition. I knew from the get-go there’d be no chance in flaming hell I’d win immunity today unless everyone else just decided not to bother. No matter how quick I get done with that puzzle, I had a feeling that I’m still going to get second or third at best. But I’m actually okay with it!

Another first that I accomplished was that I didn’t give up when faced with an incredibly difficult task. Look, beating Jordan Pines wasn’t as hard as it seemed. I’ve gotten him voted out of games before, how much harder could it be to just get him out of a simple ten-point challenge? In comparison to today’s immunity, it was like jumping from little league to major league in a minute. Thankfully this puzzle wasn’t last night’s challenge, lmfao. So I accomplished just getting the puzzle done. Win or lose, this is a proud moment. I literally spent over 8 hours just trying to get the pieces together, and 7 of those hours were spent just today alone. The outcome won’t take this feeling away from me. I’m proud! This gives me a really good argument for myself at a potential final tribal council – I came back, stuck to my guns, and proved that I never gave up at any moment in this game. EVEN KNOWING I could lose such a challenge, I dedicated eight whole hours of my life to getting this shit done. Whew.

I mean I guess there’s a little hope inside me that anyone who completes the puzzle gets some sort of reward out of it… I doubt that’s the case, but it was enough to really kick me into high gear during the first 20% of the puzzle or so to just keep at it. I needed that push.

Anyways, now that I’m back in the game, I need to find some allies. I started working on Rhone and they gave me some useful information about what went down in the game. None of it made ANY sense because I’ve missed so much, but Kai was another person that really tried to instill in me an idea that I could work with him, too.

Before coming back, I was super anti-Jordan Pines. I knew that he was gonna be a tough cookie to crack if I were to magically return and have him still here. So I played that up a lot to Kai in particular, at least to give myself an option if I need one. This might give him a sense that we’re on the same page, wanting to take out the remainders of Jordan’s allies. I’m just kinda waiting for him to swoop down and take me in under his wing. Really, I’m waiting for anybody to do that at this point…

Then again, I’ve got Rhone as a potential “in”. I’ve never played with Rhone before, but I know they’re really smart just by talking to them. I don’t want to even flirt with the idea of lying to Rhone or being a little bit dishonest. I need to be as straight-forward with them as I can because they’re NOT the kind of person I want to lie to for any reason. They’d see right through me and call me out on it, which I don’t need right now.

An idea I’ve had would be to just fill in the spot Jordan Pines made with his alliance. Hopefully they’ll accept me as a new number, because clearly I’m very against Ian. There’s like, no chance I’ll work with either Ian or Madeline or Toph at this point (and I’m not even going to talk to the latter two because… choke), so if I can find a way to send those three out back to back to back? Sign me right up!

Logan’s changed his profile picture to a leek because of some mysterious “leak” drama going around. Like, oh please keep sinking your ship. I promised Dan I wouldn’t target Logan for a bit because Dan wants to see him go far, but like Logan is kinda unnecessary to my game at the moment. I don’t trust him because he doesn’t trust me, and although I don’t have a lot of options, shattering Jordan’s old alliance *might* be beneficial for me in the long-run.

I don’t understand subtlety, so I don’t care if I win immunity and if I do, it’d be a freaking dream. I am going to make my presence in this game known one way or another, so these people had better prepare for that. I should, too. Thankfully, I’ve got this redemption idol so if things look grim for me tomorrow night, I know I’m getting at least tenth place. I don’t want to position myself as the easy vote since I’m a returner, so… let’s try hard to stick around this time and not get messy. Since I’m here, I may as well try to get to the end this time and not be chaotic as fuck. It doesn’t take big moves to win the game, but it does take strong relationships to get people convinced you deserve to win over everyone else. Like I’ve said, I have to right my wrongs from before I was voted out. Then again, I don’t let go of grudges so who knows what the future has in store for me. All I know is I’m glad I'm over that hell of a puzzle.

I worked on that puzzle for over ten hours. The most I got was 35%. At least I tried.

Step one of my master plan. Cry in everybody's PMs and tell them why I DO NOT want to go home.

Step two of my master plan. Become Jordan Pines. Everybody loves Jordan Pines, so why would they vote him out? It just makes no sense. Only Ian and Kai and whoever else voted for him yesterday, and there's no fucking way I'm not getting AT THE LEAST Ian's vote. I kinda need the majority here, so it seems like my best bet is to just make them think I'm not Jaiden.

Step three of my master plan. Scramble. Hard.

And finally, step four. Play the idol on myself. Hopefully I have enough votes coming my way (aka all but mine) and I can look like a good fucking player for once and take out someone I don't like (aka Toph).

HOPEFULLY everyone votes for either myself or Ian. If Ian goes home, then yay he's dead. If they all vote me, then boo you guys just fucked up and now I cancel all the votes : D

I don't know who is willing to work with my cracked ass at this point, but I'm not going down without a fight. I'm gonna pull out all the stops to make shit happen, I'm just really really scared that I won't do it correctly.

me @ everyone in pms: "hi this is your master speaking, please vote for ian"

we all know the real jordan pines uses mind control

I'm going into the second hour on a private call with Ian while we're talking in two different alliances we're in together and discussing our PMs with people. NO ONE can sneak anything past our duo.

I love Logan my only goal in this game now is to get him to not hate me

https://youtu.be/5hV-WJy_kUI

I’m waiting for someone to Jeff Varner themself to make this vote easy

Honestly it's so funny when I have to pretend I don't talk to Ian much and even say he's sorta awkward to talk to. IF ONLY PEOPLE KNEW JUST YESTERDAY WE TALKED FOR 5 HOURS.

my dad is dead

i dont know who to trust

im immune tho

and i got a super idol

neat.

I've heard my name all day long and that gets mentally draining and I tried to set in place a plan to keep myself in, if it works,great, if not oh well it's been a fun ride so far. The reason it wouldn't work is one it's very contingent on Nicholas throwing his vote and Two- Dammit Toph spilling the real name to someone we don't need knowing, the point of getting people to throw votes is them not knowing who we might be coming for. Anyways, we will see and if I go out no one can say I didn't try

I did the thing that I wanted to do the least in this game tonight well maybe not the least I don’t know I’m using voice text for this just so everybody knows in case this is a total mess I blame Siri anyways tonight was horrible I had to cast a vote for road and I love road to death and just hoping that Rome doesn’t hate me for a bit is it just God I just really I don’t even know what to do anymore in this game I’m just I’m really relying on dudes James and to do each oh my god this is such a mess and I just I recorded a video confessional earlier but I just know I won’t have time to upload it and I’m just leaving rehearsal now and I just I don’t feel like typing but everything is it’s a mess I want to cry and a half like God Charlotte JD LA I’m so upset this This is the fucking worst and I I don’t even know if the boat is going to go my way tonight I feel like I’m really betraying Nicholas because he’s going to cast a vote for Jaden thinking that everybody else is going to vote for Jayda but nobody except I haven’t so I don’t even know if I’ll trust me after this of Oracle try to get me out or something I don’t know what I’m really trusting telephone and really trusting Madeline and Ian and Kai and I’m just so so so upset I’m going to listen to Pasha to drown out my sorrows hopefully I’m home in time for life tribal but do I even want to be on live tribal tonight I really don’t think I do god this is such a mess why do I play these games all it does is make me sad and stressed I don’t know fuck

Sorry Rhone, I was the one who convinced Dudes, Dames, and a Deutch to write your name out then convince Toph to his a double vote. It was nothing personal other than you were JP's right hand and you voted me. We just had to go with a name that wasn't being thrown around in fear of an idol...Which one was played it was just Jaiden(I told you guys we couldn't go after Jaiden this round) and he played it on me. That's two idol's used on your boi right here, I am in your house stealing all your idol'd votes. The best part, neither of them have been idols I have found! Who needs to search the island when you can get people to play their advantages with you as a beneficiary. As per usual shout out to my girl Madeline, love ya girl we couldn't have pulled off the moves we made so far without being 100% honest with each other. Special shout out to Jaiden as well, thank you so much man you made my day and I think I can start to rebuild a relationship with you, eventually all alliances must end and I feel if you stay in the game for when that time comes we can pull something off.

The only idol that won't be getting played on Ian this game is going to the idol of my heart. I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD IF THIS BOY PLAYS ME HE'S OVER.

#whatidoisnotuptoyou #athena11 #episodes

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survivorcordillerablanca · 7 years

Text

Episode 12 Confessionals

I try not to be cocky but ... I'm sorry, Jordan trying to vote me and flopping - while using the CHAOS SQUAD gimmick - has to be my favorite move in this whole game. I think I must have fallen asleep at some point and been transported back to Taveuni because this is feeling awfully familiar!!! Caron and Zach going to rocks for me ... honestly, icons. I love them both. I'm sad that Katie had to be sacrificed but I'm glad that the other two survived because I'm going to need them to take down Jordan!! Nothing person, Jordan, but this is not going to be Taveuni 2.0 ... I'm not going to let you comp win your way to the end. Not today, Satan. NOT TODAY!

I can't believe... that worked... I deadass went to Charlotte with information of Luke/Jordan wanting her out, and I knew that the chances of Char believing me were fairly slim since our history in KS. But I figured, and Carson did as well, that J/L/K are a trio, and although a quad with Char, that they are extremely powerful in this game and they have such a good argument to win in the final 2 due to the 7-2 slant of ulta/copa Now I feel like we have a pretty solid 3 of Char/Carson/myself vs Jordan/Luke. I'm going for immunity hard because I know that if J/L win, then they're going to idol the other person, and one of the ulta members will leave. At least in the chance that I (or even Carson/Char) win immunity, it's a 50-50 chance. I think Carson has the least likely chance of being voted by them though, so good for him! Seeing Katie being rocked out thought was sad because I enjoy her and think she's amazing, but was SO FUCKING GREAT! CARSON AND I WERE SO HYPED BECAUSE WE MADE sappy messages being like "it was great meeting you again, i love you and we should be friends once this season's over :(" SINCE IT WAS A 66.7% CHANCE ONE OF US WERE LEAVING AND ALSO, I EXPERIENCED A ROCK DRAW. I can finally die happy. I kind of wish I got rocked out, but nonetheless i'm still grateful to be here. Immunity is live tonight so that's worrying too. Overall, "Operation: Eject Luke" was partially a success since we weakened their strong trio, but there's still a lot of game to play. I haven't even thought about the final two plea yet, but I know that I was the person who got this flip to happen so... i'm on some path, at least.

Last round was WAY too wild. I was so sure we had the numbers to get Charlotte out but it turns out they were playing us, ROCKS WERE DRAWN, and Katie went home which sucks because she was a definite number for Jordan and myself so now we're outnumbered. But being outnumbered is our speciality, we've been outnumbered this entire game. I have the idol in my back pocket and I'm 100% set on using that idol on myself if I don't win the immunity challenge. If Jordan wins immunity, I play it on myself. If I win immunity, I play it on Jordan. If neither of us wins.....sorry Pines, every Copa for himself?

I was going to do a video confessional but honestly I'm too tired. Somehow I seem to have been put in a position where I'm in the middle of two alliances and have to decide what I want to go with. Again. Seriously, I wasn't kidding when I said that I felt like we were back in Taveuni. I spent like 45 minutes on call with Carson and Zach last night trying to figure out what we wanted to do. There's a pretty good chance that Luke has the idol and we're pretty sure that he's not reckless enough to try to play it on Jordan and leave himself exposed. That would be an insane kind of loyalty, right? There's also the possibility that Katie was voted out with it, or that Jordan has it and he's been playing up being 'desperate' and worried this vote ... but that seemed pretty Extra even for him. If he had an idol, he'd just play it and call it a day.. right? I suppose there's the off chance that he could be trying to get both he and Luke through this vote but that just can't happen. I'm sorry, you're C*pa ... you can't seriously expect two of you to make it to Final 4. It's a miracle you've survived as long as you have! I mean .. no. Just no. I'm in this awkward position though because like ... okay, I spent an hour on call (maybe 90 minutes? IDK) with Jordan last night and I do genuinely like him as a person. As extra as he might be. Do I want to support my local Jordan Pines and save him? Eh, that's up for debate... though there's no denying that having him around certainly makes my life more interesting. Good interesting or bad interesting? Again, up for debate. Zach and Carson are the reason why I'm still here. If it weren't for my relationships with them, Jordan might have successfully voted me out and not played the fool with that Chaos Squad bullshit. AGAIN. Turning on them to save the person who tried to vote me out last round? Even if he's promising me he'll cut Luke off at F4 and take me to F3? I'd have to be a moron. I'd have to be the stupidest person on the planet to trust Jordan Pines again. Fool me once, shame on me. Fool me twice? Burn, bitch. Burn. So I'm going to talk to Jordan today, and I'm going to consider my options, but the chances of me flopping are slim to none. I think it would be an awful game move and it would tank my jury relationships on the off chance I managed to make it to the F2. Way to go, Jordan. Look what you made me do.

So I know I said last round that it was every Copa for himself and that the idol was being played on me.....well....idk how sure that it is now but I could possibly be playing the idol on Jordan Pines. I know it's crazy and it could completely backfire on me but like.....I'm so nervous about this round. We're trying to convince Charlotte to vote with us but we don't think that she's going to do it so we have to think long and hard about which of us the idol is going to be played on. Eurgh...I hate that Golden Rope.

JORDAN PINES ISNT FUCKING DYING, LUKE IS PLAYING THE IDOL ON ME FUCKIGN FREEDOM. FINAL 4 AND THEN I AM TWO CHALLENGES AWAY FROM HOPEFULLY WINNING OMG AHHHHHHH JORDAN FUCKING PINESIF LUKE GOES TONIGHT, I WILL CRY, LIKE ACTUALLY BREAK DOWN IN TEARS. WE HAVE BEEN THROUGH THICK AND THIN TOGETHER ADN I DO NOT WANT TO FINISH THIS GAME WITHOUT HIM. in all sincerity i would rather lose to luke in finals than win without him there. He is my rock in this game, and if I survive and he doesn't tonight. I might just cry.

sooo... i used the golden rope to stop jordan from winning immunity?? so charlotte won immunity bc of me, then i get to go to wishing well and get: [10/4/2017 6:52:39 PM] Ryan Palmer: Congratulations! You have earned yourself a task from the well. Once you complete this task to the hosts appeasement you may earn a special reward. This is the Final Five tribal council, it's a big one! And this Reward you can earn is MASSIVE! It can drastically alter the fate of this game. And for a power that big, you need to do something drastic to earn it. You need to Self-Vote at this Tribal Council. As long as you don't submit an official vote this power will be yours. And another temptation, just know that this power can be used whether you are in or out of the game. If you do not complete it you will earn nothing. LIKE... im not gonna self vote out of this game so im not gonna go for it even though i desperately want to. with jordan and luke both able to be voted for, it seems like we're gonna be voting for jordan, assuming luke has the idol and will use it for himself?? i hope that we're able to somehow do something where i wont be idoled out. i reaslly hope im not idoled out bc i just wanna make it past 4th so i can improve my placement this time around. idk if theyre voting me ro zach but honestly... i might be a shitty ally by saying this, but i hope theyre voting zach :/ i dont wanna be idoled out at all and i feel like i might be taking this game a bit more seriously than zach?? idk i dont want either of us to go so ill pray for that outcome instead. i really hope i can survive this tribal

So like ideally I think the vote tonight is going to be 3-2 Jordan/Me or Jordan/Carson. Preferably Carson just because I like my track record of minimal votes, but I doubt that I will be receiving 0 votes tonight. On a similar note, there's chances that I won't even be here tomorrow. Like... my gut tells me Jordan is going to be idolled and i'll be leaving. Going out with a bang, tbh. If I leave tonight, will I be proud? Let's go down memory lane. I will be proud. Despite being inactive due to consecutive immunities, I played during the merge. I came in as a 2nd placer, and potentially am getting fifth with 2 (or 4/5) votes cast against me total. I flipped votes, survived rocks, fucked over jordan pines' immunity (OKAY THAT LAST ONE WAS NOT GOOD I FELT SHITTY AS FUCK), but nonetheless I accomplished a lot or experienced more than the average survivor game. I hope it's in my favour tonight and that I wake up to see the final four. If not, then i'm satisfied with my experience and at least I go out somewhat big (idol, that is. if someone flips ill be disappointed) and on that note, it'd be dumb for C/C to flip because.. say hi to 3rd and 4th!

so apparently jordan/luke are voting zach if theyre telling the truth to charlotte (or if charlottes telling the truth to me, you never know.) im praying + hoping ill be safe and make it to the final 4 to hopefully match or redeem myself from my previous athena placement. ive just come so far i cant lose now idk.ive put so much into this game. jordans WAY more desperate acting than luke so idk if lukell play it on jordan if he has it or whatever ahhhh

You know, Jordan Pines almost convinced me to save him. It's nine minutes until tribal and I'm still not 100% sure I'm doing this. I guess we'll find out, won't we?

#NotAGameForLapdogs

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