#i know all three of them thrived off of the toxic competition

[compromised-emotionally]

Challengers was amazing but I feel like I have such blue balls from the Art/Patrick relationship

#challengers movie spoilers #challengers 2024 #i know all three of them thrived off of the toxic competition #but i just needed them all to just live in a house together and kiss #eagerly awaiting the fanfic #hope this picks up with the tumblr and fic crowd

[hhughes]

౨ৎ ‧ 𝑺𝑨𝑫𝑰𝑬 𝑯𝑨𝑾𝑲𝑰𝑵𝑺? ✗  𝒱𝐼𝒪𝐿𝐸𝒯 & 𝐿𝒰𝒦𝐸

ᡣ𐭩 pairing — violet kingston x luke hughes

ᡣ𐭩 AU summary — in which luke hughes falls in love with his best friend

ᡣ𐭩 note — it felt fitting to start the new account with my oldest au but also a piece you haven’t seen before x this one has been in the drafts a while… I adore high school luke and vi so much🥺 as always I hope you like it and please tell me what you think. I feel like a lot of out luke and vi pieces, especially the younger ones, really showcase luke's adoration for vi, and this really gives us more of an insight into how smitten violet is for him <3

“don’t start,” violet states when she arrives at their chosen table at the cafeteria, her and dylan the first two to arrive as usual.

“I didn’t even say anything,” he defends lifting his hands and violet sends him a knowing look as she takes the seat across from him

“not yet. but by that little glint in your eye I can tell you’re about to and you can save your breath. I’m not asking him, I'm not even sure I'm going," violet says and dylan lets out a frustrated sigh. he's been trying to convince her to ask luke to the sadie hawkins dance for at least two weeks straight but to no avail.

"I'm just saying, if you don't ask him soon, you might miss your shot. another one asked him today, that makes it what? three total..." dylan says and violet freezes mid-bite, lowering her apple and staring wide eyed at her friend

"who?" violet asks, her heart squeezing a bit at the thought of Luke going to the dance with someone else

"veronica williams," dylan asnwers and violet's face immediately turns sour. the nerve of that little -

"why are we talking about her-who-shall-not-be-named?" luke asks as he gets to the table, taking his regular seat next to violet, his arm automatically looping around her waist. he smirks as she slaps his hand when he reaches for a cracker in her lunch box, squeezing her hip in retaliation

"just telling vi who asked you to the dance today," dylan answers innocently and luke shrugs when he feels violet's eyes on him

"don't know why she bothered asking me, she knew I was gonna say no," luke says and dylan hums in agreement. it was a well known fact that violet and veronica didn't exactly get long, to put it lightly.

what started out as an innocent kindergarten friendship blossomed into a toxic competitive rivalry at the end of middle school and ever since then veronica has made it her mission to try and upend violet on every little thing. violet was almost sure half the extra curriculars she did was just because violet showed an interest in them.

violet didn't care when veronica ran for student government, or applied to be the head editor of the school paper, or challenged her for captain of the dance team. violet thrived off a little competition and she loved winning fair and square, as she often did in these little battles between her and the other girl.

violet couldn't quell the growing ball of jealousy, annoyance and insecurity at the thought of veronica going after luke. violet wasn't oblivious to the other girl's model-like appearance, and most of the time she was actually quite nice, when her attention wasn't directed towards violet.

dance captain, president of student government and editor of the school paper? those were all things violet would be more than happy to give her. but luke? her luke? was not something she was okay with sharing. violet knew luke wasn't even veronica's type. she was only doing it to get a reaction...

"easy tiger. are you missing the part where I said heck no? s'no need to get yourself worked up over it vi, you know that's what she wants. and then you have to deal with all that at cheer practice," luke reasons

"I'm quitting cheer," violet announces and luke pulls away to look at her, but she clenches the sleeve of his hoodie on the arm around her waist, keeping him close.

"what? why? if this is about veron-" luke protests but shuts up when violet stuffs a cracker in his mouth

"it's not. I've been wanting to quit a while. I only did it because I wanted to try something out of my comfort zone. and I did, but I don't love it, not like I love dance, and I would rather spend more time doing something I love. besides now I have the time in my schedule to coach your little cousin's winter concert-"

"violet, you don't have to quit cheer to choreograph my little cousin's first grade concert. I promise you no one is gonna remember it in a few years," luke says, pushing his lunch bag closer to her as violet steals a chicken nugget from his container

"she's gonna remember it. why are you so against me quitting cheer anyway? I thought you hated it?" violet asks

"I don't hate it, I just hate the way the football players think that you being a cheerleader means that they have the right to flirt with you 24/7. like what is this? high school musical?" luke grumbles and violet smiles

“gabriella wasn’t a cheerleader…” violet replies amused

“and troy wasn’t a football player…” luke responds

“so what exactly is the high school musical reference?” dylan asks

“you know… stick to the status quo or whatever,” luke mumbles, throwing dylan with a crumpled piece of paper

“you know what I’m gonna miss about cheer?” luke asks, his hand ending up on violet’s thigh and she places hers on top of his

“what?” she asks and he smirks slightly

“seeing you in the uniform,” luke teases and violet playfully pushes his chest

“I can keep the uniform,” violet teases back and luke’s eyebrows raise

“oh? you gonna come wear it at my games? be my personal little cheerleader?” luke asks, his head dropping closer to hers and violet is hyper aware of his nose being centimetres from hers

“you wish,” violet breathes and luke grins

“a man can dream,” luke teases, leaning back with a hand on his chest

“a man can dream to disappear and no longer be witness to this,” dylan mumbles and luke kicks him against the shin

“you uh- going to the dance?” luke asks, scratching the back of his neck, his nervous tick showing and violet smiles slightly

“I’m thinking about it,” she replies

“you should wear red if you are. it’s your colour,” luke says, knowing he already has a number of red ties in his closet

“everything is my colour,” violet teases and luke grins, kissing her on the cheek

“true,” he says, tugging on the strings of the hoodie she was wearing, not even noticing its the very one he was searching for that morning.

౨ৎ

“can you calm down? what’s the worse that could happen? he says no?” violet’s little brother asks and her horrified gaze snaps towards him

“oh my god! what if he says no… what if he thinks this is totally lame and he’d rather gauge his own eyes out than go to this dance with me,” violet says and daxton just stares at her for a few seconds before glancing at her poster and back up

“I think it’s sweet and if he doesn’t, then he doesn’t deserve to go to the dance with you,” daxton says folding his arms over his chest and violet smiles at her little brother

“look he’s coming,” her brother says excitedly, and she spots luke on the ice instantly, feeling her heart speed up in her chest as he skates over to them, a puck in his hand

“here you go bud,” he calls, throwing the puck over the glass for daxton before directing his attention to her

“that for me kingston? you gonna let me see it?” luke teases and violet blushes, shakily opening the poster and pressing it against the glass so he could read it.

hey 43, do me a hughes favour and assist me in scoring a date to sadie? 🩷

violet feels like her cheeks are on fire by the time luke finishes reading and sends her a big grin.

“I thought you’d never ask,” he teases, pressing his hand flat on the glass and violet mirrors his action

at the end of their winning game, luke couldn’t wait to get off the ice, shower as quick as possible and go see his girl. doing a little jog towards her and picking her up in a bear hug when he’s in touching distance

“lemme see it. lemme see it,” he says excitedly and violet giggles as he puts her down, reaching for the poster

“can I keep it?” luke asks, clenching the poster tight and violet nods

“thanks for coming, where’s dax?” luke asks, grabbing violet’s hand as they make their way out of the building

“probably passed out in the car by now,” violet jokes and luke squeezes her hand

“are you coming over for dinner tonight? you have to… I have to show mom your poster. shes gonna love it,” luke pleads

“yeah I can come to dinner,” violet agrees, pulling out her phone to text her parents. never being able to say no when he pulls those big puppy eyes on her

“so what colour dress you wearing?” luke asks as he puts his gear in the trunk

“red,” she answers sheepishly and luke smiles, hooking a finger in her belt loops and pulling her into him

“what are you doing?” violet giggles as luke teasingly lifts the edge of her hoodie

“checking to see if you wore the cheer uniform,” he says and laughs as she swats him on the arm

“are you insane? its way too cold. and I think I embarrassed myself enough for one night,” violet replies and luke pecks her on the nose

“I think you looked cute. standing there with your little sign. I’m gonna wow you with my dance moves,” luke teases moving his legs an attempt of some sort of shuffle move and violet laughs

“are you laughing at me?” he asks, tickling her waist and pulling her into another hug

“those legs were made for skating lu, definitely not dancing. lucky for you, you have a super good teacher,” violet says and luke hums agreeing, pressing a kiss to her head

#💌violet x luke

[variousqueerthings]

not as an "against anyone elses read" headcanon, but I cannot see johnny as being anything but better than daniel at karate when it's used as a competitive offensive sport, and not just because his whole ethos was built around karate being used to fight (and win) but because johnny's personality/life/body/self is tied to doing karate, while I think daniel is much more uh... I want to say well-rounded, despite the badness in his brain right now... but also he relates karate to his connection with miyagi specifically

not that I know that this was intentional, but it's also why I read johnny's training methods - while oftentimes a bit exaggerated in their ridiculousness - as better at connecting with students where they are, because he's not trying to emulate a specific person + once he lets go of the "a man out on the street confronts you..." strike hard mentality, he especially is just kind of... going with his instincts - which, again, if we ignore how dangerous cement mixers actually are are pretty good (I feel like s4 johnny was floundering a lot emotionally post sam-roof-jump, feel like... I wanna say s6... he'll get some balance - yes, we're using balance as a "get it... I'm talking about balance... and johnny... because.... *mumbles drift off awkwardly something about johnny thriving under miyagi-do teachings*..." anyway)

daniel is so caught up in what miyagi might want/what miyagi gave to him that he can't evolve what he's learned for his students or even really for himself, because what he's really trying to do is honour/mourn miyagi, and it's not until literally the last episode of s4 that he thought about challenging that mentality in himself (also when he was teaching miguel how to fix cars!!!), which is part of why I'm excited to see what chozen will bring to the mix

but he stopped doing karate, presumably when miyagi died

and he picked it up again to be closer to miyagi and his ethos again, because that was where he used to feel grounded and safe

he was never "meant" to fight... that wasn't what he was doing karate for --- that post pointing out as well that daniel wins all three fights in the movies by confusing the hell out of the antagonists, which is hilarious and true and interesting in terms of like... cobra kai daniel who's trying to be the pacifist that miyagi was, but is assailed pretty relentlessly, both physically and emotionally, until he feels he's got to hit back -- although that being said, daniel sort of does want to fight/spar especially johnny a lot, even in s1 (which is g a y of him) + his connection with chozen in s3 also gives us hints of a daniel whose thinking is moving in new directions (but then he misuses the technique chozen showed him against johnny... daniel's brain is all over the place, I love him, I want chozen to squish his cheeks and tell him to b r e a t h e ! ! ! )

that's not to say he couldn't win against kreese (he did so using the technique chozen showed him) or against those hockey dudes (I'm still trying to make that fit, because I don't know why he started fighting them, only thing I can think of is impressing johnny, because "defending amanda's honour" is like... really? or maybe he finally broke -- years of guys being toxic dicks around your perceived unmanliness *cough* queerness *cough* will do that, anyway anyway) or tying with johnny, who always does worse when he's getting insecure about a fight. very interesting that daniel using the technique that chozen showed him doesn't work to score him a point/beat johnny!

TL;DR for daniel, karate isn't his whole self - for johnny karate is like... air. His whole self is tied to doing it

for daniel it's a means towards inhabiting an ethos that his father lived by, even if he's been struggling since his death to come to that ethos without using his memory as a crutch :(

not sure where to end this. in some ways johnny is the karate kid, although not for the bullshit reasons that daniel-dislikers tout (why do they watch the karate kid movies I ask over and over)

#johnny lawrence #daniel larusso #ck #cobra kai #the karate kid #unformed thoughts getcha unformed thoughts here! #cobra kai meta #i just think in a friendly spar -- competition but friendly... johnny at his most relaxed and confident... feeling like this fight MATTERS #vs the s4ep5 fight where johnny doesn't actually want to fight (and neither does daniel but that's different - #daniel is a scrappy cat caught in an alleyway kinda guy he'll just scratch harder if he feels cornered) #and johnny in the tkk finale sort of didn't want to fight -- not like kreese told him to #he hands the trophy to daniel in relief #but IF it was friendly... they really trained together for a hot second and didn #'t properly friendly spar???? the homophobia #them friendly sparring is like a promised sex scene is2g

[dropsofletters]

split-ends and break-ups

title: split-ends and break-ups pairing: park chanyeol/reader genre: band!au/ex-boyfriend!au/enemies to lovers!au summary: when participating in a battle of the bands to earn a position in some discography, she realizes that one of the contestants is none other than her ex. musically and physically blessed, as well as extremely sweet chanyeol is there to compete, though it falls upon his shoulders to let his competitive blood destroy his past love’s chance at success…or he could simply remember all that happened before their fall out. type: fluff/angst/romance word count: 9,688

No plethora of convincing quotes, astonishing inspirational speeches and phrases along the lines of ‘it will be alright’ could make her believe in hope. Such a harsh mindset is the necklace that hangs around her neck, digging into her skin uncomfortably, glowing in the dark when she sees the flickering lights of her apartment casting its power down on to the living room. Somewhere, her bandmate must be sleeping, specifically the guitarist, but instead of seeking for her flat pillow and her rusty bedsheets, she opts to stay up late once again, pen moving against her old notebook, writing down lyrics while her bass peacefully rests on her lap.

Not that it is any closer to sounding in its heavy tune, considering that her brain is completely dried from inspiration, wondering why musicians must suffer in order to be big. The best bands did it—she has tried to convince herself for the past two years in which they are played small gigs in local bars—, but they are truly getting nowhere. Once her apartment was only shared with herself and now, looking to save some more money to record a few songs, she had to share it with her deep sleeper of a guitarist. Somewhere in between reaching her dreams, she has lost herself. Refrigerator void of food. Soul void of happiness. Mind void of ideas.

It’s a cycle as of now.

Everything burns. The ache of her legs, seated atop a couch that can only pain her so much, cheap to its core. Her heart, it burns, simply because she doesn’t know what to do anymore—if being a secretary is even an option now that a bassist didn’t work, if people were right when they said that she should have simply stuck to something simpler. Her fingers push her bass down, trying to find a rhyme that isn’t ‘love’, for she is tired to writing songs about loving for one night and forgetting in the other. Tired is what she is, of everything and anything, of wishing for stardom but not even being able to look up at the stars in her own goddamned apartment, too tiny and closed to even have proper, wide windows.

Brand new is not her bass when she comes up with a brief hook, one that does not make her happy, the corners of her mouth turning down when anger finally lifts her off the couch. Her legs creak under her weight, putting her bass down and placing her hands on each side of her temples, fingers caressing over the skin around her parietal bones. Everything seems to be falling down for her, flashing back to the times in which people had told her that she was good—but not outstanding enough to be a musician, a well-known at that.

It’s too hard to forget when all she has ever dreamed of is to be on a stage and play the bass.

Three in the morning and the moonlight is testing her when she turns off the lights and can’t even reach for her keys, wanting nothing more to get out and look for some snacks to have in that twenty-four-hour convenience store a few blocks away. Scared, she is not, as if the world and all the bad in it paralyzed because of her disdain. Her steps are quickened, bag tossed over her shoulder and crossing her waist, a t-shirt falling halfway on her thighs, her leggings with a few holes here and there—clear notification that she was probably wearing her pajamas. Trying is not in her vocabulary anymore.

Not when the moon looks just as hopeless as she is, the wind barely blowing in such a damned place. The butts of cigarettes rest on the streets, the music is far too distant to even be pleasurable, broken glass shatters under the weight of anyone’s shoes, the drinking habits of the city toxic in its vast meaning. A deep sigh is enough to make her feel like this city doesn’t even hold oxygen anymore, simply living off monoxide. Some people are sleeping on the streets, highlight of the poverty that no one does anything to fight for, and she closes her eyes while quickening her steps.

Musicians are never fully happy, someone once told her, or maybe she read it in a magazine. What a curse that comes with the most beautiful of unions—through tunes and melodies, comes saddening memories of never reaching the dream she wished for.

On behalf of destiny, something stops her, a rock on the way that almost has her tripping over her own feet. Flip-flops are definitely not a good idea to go out in, but it is enough of a distraction to have her rolling her eyes. Leaning her hand against the brick wall by her side, she takes the rock out of her shoes, looking to the side simply to catch a glimpse of the harsh surface, covered by something that she can’t quite describe. A pamphlet, she realizes soon after, folding it in between her hands to bring it closer to her face.

A few guitars, the typical, half-assed job graphic designers do in most occasions when describing music. What catches her attention is the price of this competition, a battle of the bands with the chance of signing with a discography and some money with a few zeroes added to it. It’s enticing, glorious, enough of a push and put in such a place for her to save the pamphlet inside her pocket.

In the future, this will only be a flashback for her memoir, when everything was difficult before that battle of the bands turns her and her band into stars.

Or she sure hopes her future reads out that way.

🥁

“Maybe, we should get a band tattoo in commemoration of this moment.”

Slipping the yellow straw in between her lips to take a sip of her smoothie, she lifts her eyebrows at one of her bandmates, the vocalist to be exact. “I don’t believe your choices in tattoos, Hee Young.” She adds, looking at Hee Young as she picks from the variety of noodles in the gas station little convenience store. Maybe, this is part of the rock lifestyle, simply living off whatever snack is easier to pop in some boiling water or in the microwave. Not caring is the new black, some may say if you ask them. “Someone with a butterfly tattoo with the name of her ex on her left ass-cheek is definitely not a person to be trusted.”

Hee Young lifts her gaze, puffy and frizzy hair short and resting under her earlobes, pierced from top to bottom. Her voice is sweet compared to how tough she looks, tall and long, unapproachable at its finest. “Says the bassist with the bright yellow pants. Learn how to dress and then we can talk aesthetics.”

The only male in the group, and the drummer, pops his head from behind a rack of sunglasses, sporting ones with hearts on them. Andrew’s softened heart is too big to even be in a group with three of the most complicated, least understanding women in the world. The youngest simply wants to have fun, he says, loving the process of learning more than the success lifestyle. “Don’t cause a fuss.” He says, embarrassment coating his words. “You two are always fighting.”

“She’s the Paul to my John, let us be.” She argues, taking another sip of her smoothie before nodding her head towards the bathrooms outside the shop. “Should I go check up on Seong Im? She hasn’t gotten out in a while.”

“That’s why our diet should not only consist of noodles and salty, greasy snacks.” The youngest and yet wisest Andrew indicates, pulling the pink sunglasses down his slim nose. “It causes diarrhea.”

“Gross.” Hee Young whispers, putting the noodle packs back down on their spots. “What would you buy for a normal dinner? I think we deserve it after getting accepted in the battle of the bands.”

Andrew bites down on his bottom lip, quirking the corner of them up soon after. “…Salad sounds healthy.”

“I doubt we’re going to find vegetables in some gas station, Drew.” She argues, only to earn a shrug from Andrew.

“It may be about time for us to stop buying stuff in the gas station, then.”

“We have one hour of being a casted band in some contest and we’re already speaking as we can afford that.” Her voice is uneven when a smile appears on her face, patting her hand against Andrew’s shoulder. “But if it makes you happy, buy whatever. I’ll go look for Seong Im and wait in the car.”

What she hears in the background is the sound of Hee Young trying to convince Andrew of getting some snacks, to what he can simply deny her offers. The air fills her lungs when she opens the door, looking around the half-empty gas station at this hour of the night, some of the workers having dinner by the pavement. Her movements are slow when her fingers look in the pockets of the yellow pants that Hee Young always curses, reaching for the keys and twirling it in between her skilled bassist fingers.

Yellow is a color of happiness. The sun. Her first guitar and maybe, even the color of the dress she wore when she had her first kiss. When things were easier, definitely so, when musicians seemed cool instead of troublesome and filled with worries. The straw brings her happiness, too, her greens inserted in a drink that has her sighing at the precious coldness, the color seeping from her body now that her band got accepted after their audition. They are going to be able to compete for a contract with a discography, something that any musician is fighting and thriving for, to be treated like royalty in a world of warriors.

Her knuckles knock against the bathroom door, hearing a loud: “What?!” coming from the inside. That voice, definitely a bit obstinate, belongs to her guitarist perfectly.

“Are you okay in there?”

“Yep. Having the time of my life!”

“What happened? Indigestion?”

“…Don’t wanna talk about it.”

With a smile playing on her features, she nods her head. “I’ll be in the car when you get out.”

Near the shared car between her guitarist and herself, however, there is another car parked, a man standing beside it to fuel it. His back is turned to the workers, his profile clear to her and oh lord, does she know those features. A tall man with a nice profile, plush lips matching his slightly wide nose, big eyes innocent when he is doing most tasks, determined when playing the drums and a haze when he used to look at her. Those big hands, one resting on the windows of the car, had wrapped around her waist, rested on her thighs and explored all of her once or a hundred times of her life, in that damned car of his, with the music blasting just like it does right now, the people inside it the bandmates that she had once shared spots with.

A bassist for another band—Park Chanyeol’s band—she had once been. At the time, she was dating him, like the poor, oblivious woman that had fallen in love with him simply to break it off thanks to musical differences. Chanyeol wanted to experiment, while she wanted to continue to grow in the punk and rock spectrum of music, leaving them more separated than they had ever been. Three years later and she is in a new group, while he continues to shine in his beauty, unaware of her existence and yet, so close to her.

Something tells her that this is not the last time she is going to see him, much more when she gets closer and tries to get inside her car from the back doors, not wanting to be noticed by him, only to see a name-tag just like the one resting on top of her white tank top, reading his name and the title of the battle of the bangs competition.

No way.

No fucking way.

She was going against the band that had created her as an artist.

When Chanyeol lifts his gaze, she plops her body down in the backseat, looking up at the ceiling in hopes of not being caught by him. What she needs right now is to figure out the reason of her nervousness, why competitiveness settles inside her body in pure revenge for having him break-up with her thanks to the constant arguments about music. What he was once said was ‘great music’ could never compare to hers, she tries to argue with herself, though her mind tells her that Chanyeol’s group is fully capable of winning, too—

But no.

They are not.

Not when this is her chance of finally showing that ex-boyfriend of hers that her vision was right. Pride, oh such a damned thing, and the reason why she sits up to look at Chanyeol’s old car drive by. Pride has become her best friend just now.

🥁

When on stage, she feels like a different woman.

People are told what to do eighty percent of their lives; some understandable, some mere stigmas, some simply because of the individuals they surround themselves with. In her opinion, though, her bass gives her rules that adjust to her. She is not broke and misunderstood when on top of the stage, rehearsing in that same place in which they are going to perform just a month from them. She is not the girl-next-door turned into a nightmare when the bass pumps from her veins and her arteries to the crowd, musicians that equally appreciate and envy, all rats seeking to thrive from the same source of food. Some are behind the stage, others are resting on some of the seats, other seated in the floor but when she turns around and shares a smile with Andrew, she feels like she belongs.

Women are expected to be a million things, straight-up perfect. They are expected to be or not to be, never in between, never able to show that they are weak or if they are, they should cry for everything and anything, unable to help themselves in the eyes of the world. In her silence, people would think her troublesome personality comes from a space of clear trust issues, but that is not the case. She found other people just like her, who lifted her up when they needed to fight together. The joyful Andrew, too sweet to even be true, kicked out of his high school for bad grades back in the day and still fighting for a happy ending. The comedic Seong Im, definitely gorgeous enough to be a model and still, releasing some of the best guitar solos she has ever heard. Hee Young, the one that put them together, her middle school enemy and now, her best friend. People who had given their life out to craft music and now were fighting for a chance to be alive.

To be a band.

Her foot rests on the side of Andrew’s drum-set, smiling to him when she moves her fingers on her bass with tranquility, not missing a single tempo, the two in charge of making a song much more understood. Much to her disappointment, however, there is a point when she can’t even listen to her bass, the amplifier releasing an elongated, high, shrilling noise before her bass comes to a halt, though her movements don’t. her eyes widen, turning around and trying to turn the device on with her foot, only to see the lack of a flickering light that either shined green or red. Her eyes look for her guitarist, Seong Im losing her tempo thanks to the lack of the bass, the song falling flat when all they can hear are Seong Im’s late chords and Hee Young’s booming voice.

The crowd suddenly starts laughing, because life is a fucking sitcom and everyone needs to play along to their roles. People like them are meant to follow the stigma that is expected from them—to fail. Her fingers hook around her bass, settling it down as she rushes down the set of stairs that led down to the crowd’s spots. Thus she rushes around them, walking towards the backstage area, watching a lot of people get ready, either look-wise or in the music spectrum, though at the depths of musicians, mostly guitarists, she gets to see the big amount of cables that connected to the amplifiers and microphones, pushing a few people out of the way with her rushing, the pink beret on her head almost falling off it from the commotion.

By the cables and amplifiers, there are two men seated. One of them shorter than the other, bulkier, a cigarette falling from between his lips, the slit on his eyebrow and the rounded cheeks clearly making out the figure of the vocalist of Chanyeol’s band. Sam, the precious Sam that had been the one to put the two together, the first person to put a cigarette in between her lips, the friend that would accompany her to their first gigs, the songwriter of their group before Chanyeol and herself took the lead. Sam has always bled music, just like the past lovers do, yet he seems to be so passive about it, peaceful even.

Chanyeol and her could never do that.

By Sam’s side, however, much more obstinate and ambitious comes the magician that always captures her heart when he stares up at her, reminder of the days in which he made her feel like a goddess by pressing his lips to the spaces in her knuckles only to profess a passionate love for her, deep and profound. He would always look at her with wide eyes then, and to see him exchange that glance with her once again is nostalgia at its finest. It brings the food she had eaten earlier up her throat, the ache of her chest suddenly making her realize just how much she had changed from when she had started her path to music stardom.

Her closed-off shoes kick his knee, making him hiss when he holds it close to his chest. “So is this how we’re playing now? Are you sabotaging me?” The Chanyeol from the past would never be able to do such thing, too filled with softness inside the broadness of him to ever sabotage her. His legs lift him up from the floor simply to shake his head.

“I would never do that! I did not even know you were competing until I saw you up the stage!” Chanyeol argues, his voice a bit lifted in tone thanks to the ache in his knee, eyebrows moving with every word that escape his plush lips. A part of her, deep inside her brain, is telling her that she has got it twisted. Chanyeol is not one of those crazy men in the industry, and yet, she is here doubting him.

“You’re the only person here, though.” She argues, watching as people surround them in needs of hearing something more. “It would not surprise me. It was always about competition in between us two—”

Chanyeol releases a soft breath, reaching over to where she is simply to place a hand over her babbling mouth. “It was never like that. You were the one that saw it like that.”

Her tongue sticks out to get him off, though it works fairly soon, having his big palm running across his dark tee to get the saliva off. “Okay, so who did it? My amplifier is clearly disconnected and it was not like that before!”

Apart from being her ex-boyfriend, Chanyeol had once been her best friend. It’s shrilling to see such a tight bond of when they were younger, sharing anecdotes over bass solos and drum-kits, turn to dust now that they are older. Maybe, that is what love does—it destroys people, leaving them like a shell of what they used to be, or simply turning good memories into bitter ones. There are hundreds of songs she can’t sing anymore in fear of remembering him, the only man she has ever truly loved, the one person who has slowed down her world and turned it into beauty before they decided to shoot it down.

The sound of sweet laughter has her turning around, the warmth of Chanyeol’s body seeping through her skin when her back is turned to him. “We were just playing around with the cables. Chill.” One of the member of the duos competing adds, shrugging her tanned shoulders and crossing her arms over her chest.

“…So you were the one to do it?”

“We were trying to connect our amplifier and fucked it up. There are too many wires there, honey. I’m a bassist, not an engineer.”

Something about the woman with the orange hair, definitely bleached to utter lifelessness, speaks about the world as it is today. When people suddenly became swords instead of the battlers, wanting nothing more than to hurt those who got close to them or entered their territory. People cannot age, they cannot be better, they have to remain mediocre just like them. The world is all about surviving, but how can one survive when its entire population wants to slaughter each other? “I’m not playing games with you. You can’t do that type of shit. It’s not a game to me. My entire band looked bad because of you.”

“With a name like that, I doubt I did much work.” The woman says, her lips parting to retort to her comment, though the tall man behind her speaks before she could.

“Hey, calm down. You don’t have to talk to her like that.”

“It’s a competition. It’s what people do.”

Her fists bawl together, nails clinging to her skin when she pushes her body forward, ready to launch a punch on this woman’s face, a side of her that she had never seen suddenly growing inside her. They are fighting for a spot in a discography, only to be manufactured versions of who they really are, their friendships highlighted for the crowd to eat up like candy. That is as good as it gets, she imagines, stress taking the best of her when she nears the other bassist, only to be stopped by a pair of long and skinny arms wrapped around her, familiar to her skin when his booming voice can only whisper to her to lay off.

Not in those words, exactly, Chanyeol is intelligent enough to tell her that everything is going to be okay.

All force leaves her body, this demon that overtakes her when realizing that her dream is only a few fingers away and yet, she can’t grasp it. The sabotaging woman is angry, as it seems, placing one hand over her chest and cursing her out. Her name rolls off her tongue easily, like she knows her, the only thing this bassist is capable of seeing is her mistakes. Instead, she gives a glimpse of her back, turning round to see the long column of Chanyeol’s neck, his Adam’s apple prominent, the neck in which she used to hide her face in her toughest times and now, she feels like if she tried, she wouldn’t recognize the man in front of her.

“Hey, just ignore her. You’ll get disqualified if you fight. You’re not like this.” He tells her, as if repeating what she already knows.

She’s not like this.

She’s not like this.

She’s not like this.

But she has to for the dream.

“I will. I just—I—” Her voice is cut off when she finally catches a glimpse of her bandmates, all waiting for her. There are moments in life in which she feels lost, suddenly wondering what happened to the sweeter side of life. One of those memories come from them; those three people that see her every day, Sam and Chanyeol…all definitely a reminder of the golden woman she used to be, now desperate, clawing to the bits of dreaming that are left for her. “I’m sorry I blamed you.”

“Hey—”

Without much due, she goes over to her bandmates, welcomed in arms that wrap around her and make her feel safe. She doesn’t know the person she used to be in the past or the one that hopes in the future, but she wants to better this version of her. Of now. And she wants to do it as peacefully as possible.

On the stage, she is not her split-ends or her cheap clothing, she is not the roughness of her fingertips or the troubled financial status she is going through. On stage, she is an artist. On stage, she feels like she can breathe.

And no one can get through her path to the spotlight, that is for damn sure.

🥁

Her feet barely touch the ground, preparations for the big night of performance taking the best of her, sleep ridden body resting against a comfortable seat, trying to ease the ache on her limbs. Her fingers carefully play the bass, a little bit softer than normally, coming up with whatever is going on through her brain as she wonders if she should go back home, wrap herself in the blankets on her bed and lay her back on a grainy mattress. That, or she could stay here, being one with the empty practice room, getting used to the lights on her, finding inspiration on the beautiful notebooks they were gifted thanks to the competition and practicing a bit more with this equipment she can’t get enough of.

Over anything, she is a music freak. The type of person that sat down during her recess at school simply to read the old music books in the library, the one that had fallen in love with another musician when she really felt like dating. The type of person who would only stop her crying if she listened to music when she was younger, or the type of person that does not bleed disappointment in her lyrics or tunes, but instead focuses on showcasing the million parts of her heart that connect with a note. Be it D or E or even B, whatever she feels is painted in hues of colors.

Sometimes, the words in the paper do more than talk to her. Sometimes, they get to be alive, as well.

But she is not a singer. Damn her and her voice, she has always thought she is a bit too rough, for she doesn’t have that angelic nature that comes with a singer, that charisma that connects a person and brings them to tears. Perhaps, the sound of her bass would never be the tranquility to a person’s hearts, but the lyrics behind her own band are her own. Someone out there would learn to breathe with happiness again with her own hopefulness, coming from the depths of her still innocent soul that asks for a happy ending.

Or a happy development. A happy beginning never happened, either way.

But it will happen, it sure will.

The sound of a person’s voice in the otherwise empty practice room captured her attention, making her halter her movements as she turns her face to the side, almost poetically. The music is what bounds people for life; a dedicated song, a handwritten piece, anything can be a reminder of the most atrocious or beautiful moments of life. In this case, a deep voice fills the air with the sound of words she had written years ago—stupid, lovesick, the type of song that would have made her giggle and now has her rolling her eyes while some kind of feeling settles in her gut.

Besides all memories that she shares with Chanyeol, songwriting is one of them. It is as if they are one and the same, like someone copied and pasted their artistic soul into the same person. Though, they are not quite like soulmates, breaking up with Park Chanyeol felt like the worst moment of her life, being ripped apart in half with what they had become. Second chances never came, too bitter because of the one thing that connected them. What had once been the reason behind their ‘hey, you like that song too?!’ became the end of their relationship.

Funny, considering Chanyeol was the first one to tell her nothing would happen to the band they dated…and he kept his promise, until she decided to leave for something ‘more of her own’. His own heartbreak heightened then, telling her if their friendship and the future of their group was meaningless to her. At the time, it was, and now that she is older she wonders just how much things could have changed if only they stopped competing against each other. Or, for the matter, trying to push their own beliefs on the other when they just wanted to change.

People grow…they can’t ever stay the same, and to expect that from someone is deadly for any type of relationship. Platonic or romantic.

That song he is singing is the first song they ever composed together. The tune? A mess. The lyrics? Too full of love. The memory? Enchanting.

She swears she can see the Chanyeol in their old apartment, shared with two other people, when she enters the practice room and immediately realizes her existence. An entire week has passed and yet, she cannot keep herself by his side for more than a second. She doesn’t want him to ask how she is doing, or ponder why she is obstinate and short-tempered now. It only comes to show that she is the same person that had left the group three years ago. However, his eyes soften, half-covered by the bucket hat on his head when his lips pout out to speak to her.

“It’s midnight. What are you doing here so late?”

She plays another note in her bass, throwing her head back and looking up at the sky. “Answer that same question first.”

“I was…uh…” He clears his throat after trailing his voice. “The equipment here is good and I wanted to try out some of the instruments without getting weird looks from anyone.”

Oh, right, how not to expect such a thing from the ever-talented Park Chanyeol, guitar player, bass player and singer, also leaving some trail of him in pianos and whatever he touches. Her life, included. She looks at him, then, pondering if she should comment about the song he was just singing. “I was here practicing.” She whispers, watching as he nods his head and trots over to the stage, pushing his backpack down on the floor before reaching over for the guitar. “Why don’t you take the microphone first?”

Chanyeol’s cheeks lift up in a smile at that, that infamous dimple appearing out of nowhere. “Why? Do you want me to?”

“You’re a singer hidden behind a drum-kit.” She tells him, stopping her motions on her bass before giving him a smile of her own. “I always told you, you should have been a back-up vocalist.”

His long fingers wrap around the microphone, as if pondering, and this is the way he is. He listens to people, to criticism, curiosity is just one of his traits. “…Ah, no, I’m not fitted for that position.” He tells her, looking ahead as if a crowd was in there, only to break his gaze and turn back to her. “I was meaning to tell you earlier this week that your music is sounding a whole lot better. Your technique has improved.”

“…I have had time to practice.” She confesses, aware of how her life has only revolved around music lately. For better or for worse. “I maintain my ground by saying I will only be fully pleased when I see you as a vocalist.”

“Oh, come on, you’ve heard me sing. I’m not that special.”

Like the hug of a person that smells just like them, not like perfume, not like body-wash, not like sweat or anything of the like. They smell like skin, soft and warm, like the place you belong in. That is how Chanyeol singing feels like. He never noticed it then, how all the anxiety she could have felt for the future was healed with just the sound of his voice, singing or not. “You are special.” She admits, standing up from her spot and cracking her knuckles. The common ache of a bassist. “I mean, you’re my ex, but I’m not stupid. I know talent when I know it. I sing like a dying rat, and you were the one to help me out with songs when we composed together.”

“You remember?”

“Of course I do!” She answers, pushing her hands in the depths of her pocket. “Sometimes I think of a rhyme and I am like: “Shit, this is so good” and then I realize I used it for our songs.”

Chanyeol chuckles at that, shaking his head and his whole body, like he does when he is extremely happy. “I do that, too.”

“Do you remember our first song?”

“…It’s cringe, though.”

“I know,” She answers, aware of how she would have expected him to simply press his mouth to the microphone and sing the words out. She sits by the edge of the stage by then, jumping down before shrugging. “I just wanted to remind you.”

“Where are you going?”

“Home.”

“Alone?”

Reaching for her bag in one of the seats, she nods. “I have my pepper spray, my taxi number and a few punches if someone tries to try me.” Chanyeol’s lips quirk up at that, as if he is always amused by her, or perhaps he knows her enough to acknowledge that she is, indeed, one of the strongest yet softest people he knows. “Go home safe, Chanyeol.”

“You, too.” He says in the microphone, earning a laugh from her that she tries to muffle, pushing the entrance doors open before being welcomed by the elongated hallway.

The best part is when she hears Chanyeol humming to himself, the tune of their first song together clear, solid, like he has never quite forgotten it.

She is not Chanyeol’s first love, she believes, but she is surely one of his most astonishing ones.

🥁

The commotion of the city is loud in the background, but she can’t bring herself to care when the entire world rotates around the fact that there is a Rolling Stone magazine editor in the room, a journalist, the best of the best, looking for a band to interview before the grand event. Seong Im had insisted on wearing a dress for that party near the beach, the big flowers on the fabric contrasting with her dark skin, but she was against prepping herself too much for the party. Maybe, she should’ve. It could have caused more of an impression on the dress-cladded journalist that was inspecting the talents around the party, their appearances and how they seem to act in such a spot after their brief performances.

For a moment, she pretends to concentrate on the scenery outside of the wide windows, though her eyes catch a glimpse of the journalist every once in a while. The sand is almost crystal clear, the waves moving with one another, glistening under the rounded and full moon. The sky is almost black, she realizes, the same shade of her ripped jeans, something just to keep in mind. However, when she looks towards the journalist’s table, she realizes Chanyeol is nearing her, looking far more put together than she does, with a black button down that shines—perhaps, glitter is the new fashion for him—and a tight pair of pants, perfect on his legs and his calves.

Her feet pick up their speed, as fast as she tries to live through life, moving to his side before wrapping her hands around his arm. Well, it was meant to be his arm, the one with the house and the rose tattooed on it, she recalls, remembering the time she held his hand when he got them done. Nonetheless, that is what she is holding—his hand, warm, soft, delicate, like he is used to wrapping his fingertips around hers, barely slotted together and yet, imminently there. Chanyeol brings back all the memories in a simple touch, like she forgot how safe she felt when they walked together, hand in hand, instead of walking alone in separate ways. The tattoos on his knuckles match well with her skin, with the bracelet around her wrist that he may have given her in the past and when she looks at him, she can only babble an apology.

“I—I’m sorry.”

“Why are we holding hands?” Chanyeol asks, quirking his eyebrow up at their slotted hands, but the brief smile on his face speaks otherwise.

“I need you not to talk to the Rolling Stone journalist.” She tells him, placing her hands behind her back and she may as well tie them behind her back because there is no way in hell that by rushing to Chanyeol, she had held his hand. Some fish just don’t swim too far from the ocean. “…I have rehearsed my interview with her for the past week and I am about to approach her. I need to get that article. Please, just don’t.”

Chanyeol crosses his arms over his chest then, like he is trapping all his feelings in his chest. “I also want to be interviewed, silly.” He tells her, soon after rolling up the sleeves of his shirt. Don’t look at his forearms, she tells herself, but she partially wonders if their couple tattoo is still written in his skin. An emptied, outlined heart in half, the one that unites with her left arm, while his is on his right arm. It’s still there, like it is too hard to forget the mess they had made. “It’s the Rolling Stone magazine. Anyone wants to be there in an article.”

“…You already have a bit of fame around the city. I don’t.”

“What’s a little bit more of fame?”

Pushing her lips upwards, she tries to cover the half of her tattooed heart on her arm. Had he noticed? “You start to sound like me.” She tells him, aware of how star-struck and thirsty for fame she can be. “You never did it for the fame.”

“I could’ve changed.” He prompts.

“I hope you didn’t.”

“Why?” Chanyeol questions and she tries not to think about the amount of times she held on to him, and suddenly wrapping her arms around him and talk about their lives sounds like the best idea. She hasn’t realized that not a single person has ever made her feel like Chanyeol, not pre-him, not past-him. Everything would have been better for them if only music had not gotten in the way and now, music is what unites them again.

It’s easier to lie, but there she is, being truthful because Chanyeol’s eyes are enough to capture her. Brown, lord, so brown that she feels lost in the forest that is him. His skin glistens, his youth radiates even through aging, like he will always be Chanyeol, but not hers. “Because you are what the music industry needs.” She reassures. “Hookers, alcohol and drugs are overrated, they are an aesthetic. Music shouldn’t be about the visual; it should be a lifestyle.”

“That’s the type of visual you liked, though.” He tells her, pointy in his words like he is trying to prove that she was half of the reason why they broke up. The rest is his fault, as well. “You wanted the rock lifestyle. Why can’t I have it now?”

“Is this your way of telling me you like hookers?” She tries not to get him too close, changing the subject while staring at him and Chanyeol’s smile quirks up, embarrassed in the way his cheeks tint.

“Why? Do you care?”

“I do.”

But he doesn’t let go. “Why?”

“Because you aren’t like what you’re trying to make yourself to be,” She tells him. “You are one of the few hopes I have in society, actually.”

Chanyeol smiles at that, half hiding into himself but he is unable to. Too tall, too elongated, misguided body-wise, like he holds this skeleton simply to protect his softened heart. Maybe, making a mistake with her had made him a better man. She likes to believe so. “All props to hookers, don’t get me wrong, but I got out of a romantic situation not too long ago and I realized I’m more of that type of person. I’m tired of casual dating and hook-ups.”

So, he had dated. It’s expected; handsome and charming. She shouldn’t be mad, but she would be lying if she said there isn’t a ghost of jealousy inside her. “I see,”

“What about you?”

“I have never been with a hooker, if that’s what you’re asking.” She answers, bringing a laugh out of him.

“I’m asking if you have dated after…” His words trail after that, trying to find his place to ask that question. Their mistake, as she likes to call it. “After us.”

Say you did. Say you did. Lie to him and say you did. “I went out on dates, but…nothing serious.”

“I imagined you would have gotten someone by now.”

“I don’t need anyone, let’s start there.”

“Oh, I know.” Chanyeol tells her, looking down at his hands before chuckling. “Rather, I think people would need you.”

She scoffs at that. “I’m a mess,” She admits, because this is Chanyeol she is talking to. His hands could never hurt her heart, at least not intentionally. “I doubt I’d be any help for someone.”

“You helped me.”

“With what?” She asks, aware that Chanyeol had helped her grow more than he realized, before and after their relationship.

“Finding my place in music. You leaving the group had me devastated, but it gave me direction.” And that is the beauty of Chanyeol, how he stands up and dusts himself off as he travels endlessly. Maybe, that is why he helped her so much, just like she helped him. He showed her that one bad song isn’t a bad album; a painful memory isn’t a lifetime worth of sadness. Some people have to move on, for their sake, for their happiness, to find the light and the will in the world.

“Chanyeol—”

The man looks to the side, as if ashamed, pointing at the direction of the journalist as he sighs. “Someone took our spot already.”

Another band is seated with the journalist, as if they belong there, as if they are the new legendary small group. Somehow, she doesn’t care. “I don’t care.” She says. “Fame isn’t for me anyways.”

“You think so?”

“It drained away my light in my hunt for it. I can only imagine what it will do if I reach it.” She answers, licking the inside of her cheek before humming. “Have you eaten?”

“I was thinking of ordering something just now,” He replies. “Want to join me?”

“Sure, we can catch up.”

His eyes, brown and deep, a forest that starts to clear, light up at that. “I would love that.”

🥁

With a lollipop placed inside her mouth, Seong Im is seated on the hood of their old car, in front of the venue in which they are going to play in. The night is packed, only a small group of people—friends and relatives alike—gathering to see the stars. Well, as rock-star as it can get to battle for a position in a discography. Instead, her band is much too occupied in talking about the other individuals in the competition. “I don’t know. He’s nice and all, but Chanyeol looks like the type of dude who fucks in front of a mirror just because he thinks he’s hot. He probably flexes, too.”

She presses her lips together, looking inside her box of guitar picks before sighing. “He isn’t.”

And she should have shut her mouth entirely and sincerely, simply because there is a moment of dull silence before she realizes that she has just confirmed that she has a way of knowing. She doesn’t look up, however, pretending to be torn in deciding between two picks before Seong Im kicks her side softly. “Hey, how would you know that?”

Hee Young is the next one to speak, braiding her hair and interrupting her voice warm-ups to reiterate. “She definitely knows. They dated for like two years.”

Two years and eight months, to be exact. Not that long now that she thinks about it, it could have gone for longer if only they had put themselves first, even before music. The reminder is definitely not soothing and now that she gets to hear Seong Im gasp with one arm wrapped around Andrew’s uninterested persona, she speaks up. “Why didn’t you tell us that? We thought you hated him!”

“I don’t,” She announces, shrugging her shoulders soon after at the memory of the nights in which pressing her forehead to his was the only moment in which her headaches would stop. That being poor with him was what had pushed her to want to be rich and successful. That diamond rings only seemed to shine bright if he was there. “I could never hate him.” She has tried to, and for a while when they were dating she thought she hated him, but the fire from his soul would always be eased by the rain of her. There would never be anything more comforting than knowing she really tried with him.

“…So…that’s the band you were in before.” Seong Im finishes, blinking rapidly before resting her palm against her forehead. “Why did you leave?”

“We didn’t break up in good terms, I guess.”

“And why don’t you hate him? You should, if you ended up badly.” Her roommate continues, making her roll her eyes and close the lid of her woodened box.

“Because I was different back then. I let everything take the best of me, we fought too much…” She replies, wondering if things would have been different had she not being so closed up in her taste of music and had Chanyeol been more connected to his roots, not as experimental as he wanted to be. One too risky, the other too safe. “But it happened because it had to happen. I am here with you guys because of it.”

Hee Young chuckles. “You were heartbroken for a few months; dare I say a year.”

“Well, music put me back on track.”

“And music made you lost the love of your life.” Hee Young retorts, earning a sigh from her.

“I’d lose that and much more to music. I’m sure he thinks the same.”

Seong Im pushes her weight off the car, taking her by the arm and looking around the street before pushing her towards the car nearby, coated in layers of water and soap, all indicator of someone washing it. The car is not as old as hers, but she has definitely seen it before—and has been in it, as well—, and just when she looks in front of her after watching the smile on Seong Im’s face, she realizes who is washing this car.

It is a good look, too.

His sweater is wrapped around his waist, leaving him in a tank top even through the cold night. He must be freezing, too, with his hands rubbing furiously at the window. Chanyeol seems to be having a hard time, a pool of water by his feet settling him down. His eyes turn back at the sound of heavy steps and a squeal, both coming from her, and when he notices her, his frown seems to erase slightly. He calls out her name in such a way that seems like a song, enough to take the oxygen away from her lungs and she realizes then that music has really taken her life away. This man could have easily been by her side, she could be wrapped in his arms in this cold night, but they are too far away from each other, exes at their finest.

He is still kneeling, trying to get that spot in the window when she speaks up. “Did a bird poop on your car?”

“You’re saying it as if it didn’t happen,” Chanyeol comments, bringing laughter up in her when she kneels by his side, taking the other cloth bathed in soap to help him clean whatever content is on the window. “I had to go get some water inside and clean it. Just how embarrassing would it be if the journalists here saw my car with some bird shit on it.”

“It’s iconic.”

“It isn’t.” Chanyeol argues, his body shivering, the goosebumps over his arms noticeable. It is then that she realizes she is staring at his profile, his recently dyed red hair a reminder of that conversation they had after practice one of these days, in which he asked her for tips on how he could dye his hair on his own. It looked good, actually. She pushes her body closer to his, in a position in which their arms are placed together, earning a gasp from him. “…You…”

She looks down at their arms, realizing that the heart had formed, making her hiss softly. “Yeah…”

“You didn’t get it covered.”

“I couldn’t.”

“Why?”

“Do you really want to know?” She questions, watching as Chanyeol places one hand on the side of his face, his elbow resting against his strong knee, staring at her as if he can’t believe it and with amusement he chuckles. He really can’t, as it seems.

“I didn’t cover it because I love you too much. You were my best friend before we dated, I can’t simply erase you like that.” He whispers, like he doesn’t even want the wind to know. The rivers inside her become troublesome, reminder of how she had always tried to push him out of her body, saying that they would have never worked out and that he was the one at fault for never understanding her. The toxicity of them came when they decided to work together…or when they became obsessed with growing. “Truth is that I didn’t expect you to keep it on.”

So, this is why she fell in love with him, because he is sentimental above anything else. Chanyeol had once told her he loved her, a thousand times at that, but the first one is special. Seated by a window, looking out at the snow, he said the warmest thing there could ever exist. He spoke about his demons, the insecurities that ate at him, how he tried to move on too fast…to be faster than life itself, and how that kept biting at him. What dresses him in toughness is unable to keep him from her, show the real colors of the man she has loved. Continues to love in the depths of her heart, too. “…It’s part of me by now.” She tells him. “If I covered it, I was afraid I would lose me.”

“You wouldn’t,” He tells her. “Because you’re not my half. You are more than that.”

“…I know.” She replies. “I wish I had known that sooner.”

Her knees are about to give in, just in time for Chanyeol to stand up and take a dry cloth, rubbing at the windows with ease. “I guess it happens to the best of us.”

“Being friends, dating, breaking up and one of them leaving the group because they couldn’t even stand the other?” She asks, making a smile appear on his face. “That’s not very common.”

“But it’s our story.”

“So?”

“That makes it better.”

The sound of her band name being called makes her turn around, albeit hesitantly, because she doesn’t want this moment to end. She is being called to get ready, earning a sigh from her when she stares back at Chanyeol, only to see him stare at her like he wants to learn her. Study her. He needs to keep her in his memories for when he is old and he is bound to forget. “I have to go now.” She says, walking backwards just in time to see him lift a thumb up.

“Good luck in there.”

But the toughest of lucks was losing a man like him.

🥁

The skies above mock her, shining with city lights and clouds and stars, all too bright for her, a reminder that success is not knocking at her door. The thick yellow jacket on top of her white hoodie is supposed to make her feel more at ease, even remotely happy, but giving her best on stage only to come up on third place was definitely a low blow for them. Andrew took it the best, celebrating getting such a spot, but the women in the group were devastated. The victory goes to Chanyeol’s band, she tries to process, happy yet a bit puzzled.

What would her group do now?

Sam had taught her how to smoke and she doesn’t do it at all, but right now it sounds like a great idea, going for a drive and stopping at the usual gas station simply to pick up some snacks. Much to her delight, however, the same man that she has been watching for the past month, talking and reconnecting like they will earn something from it, is fueling his car just at that moment. Just like her, he is wrapped in cozy clothing, the tips of his ears red, bringing a smile to her face when she pushes the box of cigarettes to the depth of her coat. Now, she doesn’t need them.

“What’s up winner?” She asks him, making him widen his eyes and press a hand to his chest. Chanyeol turns around to look at her, smiling at the sight of her, though a bit nostalgic.

“Doing great.”

“I’m glad.”

“What are you doing here?” He is the first to ask, leaning his body against his car. His arms are crossed over his chest and she still feels giddy at the reminder that under those clothing, a tattoo keeps them connected.

“I’m going to grab some snacks, you know.” She tells him, clicking her tongue soon after and nodding, as if nothing is wrong. Actually, she is healthy and she got some recognition from her hard work. Her band may not be fine, but the future may be brighter, with less debt and more fame.

“Good,” He says. “Actually, I was planning on asking you something.”

She nears him, copying his position against his car. “What would that be?”

His lips part majestically, though a bit confused in their approach. “Sam and I were talking, along with our groupmates, and we figured we could have two bassists. You could join us before we sign our contract with the new discography.”

Chanyeol may be her past and god, he was one hell of a good past, the ignition of her dream of music…but her friends were there for her when they had broken up, she created a new world and discovered that her story with Chanyeol was mistaken when they added another lover to their sheets and their hearts. Music. “I’m going to say no.” She denies. “I am happy with my guys. Nothing against you…or your band, but I am not betraying my own.”

“I expected you to say that.” The wind blows near them, moving the strands of his red hair, his cheeks getting touched by the gentlest of pink touches. Chanyeol rarely blushes but the wind serves to caress his tan skin. “You were always too loyal.”

“That’s a good thing. We dated, after all.”

“We did.” Chanyeol comments, hearing the sound of his car getting completely fueled before paying attention to the task at hand. “I wanted to ask you something else—”

“What would that be?” She quirks one eyebrow, aware of how Chanyeol’s deep voice is doing its best to look for her joints and her bones, drag her back into the beauty of him.

“Since we won’t be able to see each other almost every day from now on, I thought I could take you out on a date.” For old time’s sakes, and to mend what was once broken. Like split-ends, their split will never end, for they will always come back together. “…Not that you have to say yes.”

On the tip of her toes, she reaches forward to shorten the distance between the two, her lips touching his in one of those brief ‘good morning’ kisses she gave him when they just woke up. At the time, Chanyeol was not much of a morning person, but he must have lit up this entire night with the taste of coffee-brewed kisses. She smiles, showing a big part of her teeth when she says: “Did you really think I was going to say no?”

Caught red handed, Chanyeol wraps his arms around her waist, leaving his mouth slightly ajar to kiss her softly, like he wants to serve every night they spent alone in just one try, bring warmth to every corner of their souls. He wants the ‘us’ they crafted back, the one before music could get in between them. “No.” He whispers. “I missed you so much.”

For the first time in over three years, she can wrap her arms around his shoulders, rest her cold nose against his neck and breathe in his scent when she promises herself they can get through this, they can love each other again, not like they ever did, with one heart palpitating to connect them, creating music that they could only share with each other.

“Not more than how much I missed you.”

#chanyeol scenarios #chanyeol #exo scenarios #exo #kpop scenarios #writing #exo au #exo fluff #exo angst #chanyeol au #chanyeol fluff #chanyeol angst #drummer!chanyeol #tell me what you guys think please!

[desertislandcloud]

Ulrik Munther is the first to admit that self-doubt can get the better of him. But you might be daunted too if you were about to release the most honest and thought-provoking work of your career.

At just 27, Munther is already a seasoned artist with years of industry experience. Signed as a teenager to Universal Music in Sweden after winning the prestigious Melody Grand Prix Nordic competition with an original song, he also achieved viral fame with his endearing cover of Lady Gaga’s “Born This Way”. Three albums followed, all charting in the top five in Munther’s home country. “I grew up in the public eye… I was sort of a teen idol,” he says, wincing a little at the term. “I've been seeking an audience that digs a bit deeper into lyrics and has more of the same shared world view.” He adds, laughing: “I want to make new friends!”

Fans of Munther’s old music would have trouble recognising him now. His new album, Put Your Self Out There, is an astounding work that shows a young man grown wise from experience, but one who is still deeply curious about the world. Munther has a philosophical mind. He thrives on ideas, and on a willingness to challenge and be challenged on important subjects. This music shows him standing on the edge, ready to set sail on a new adventure.

“What I want to say most with this music is probably, be yourself and be honest,” he says from his home in Gothenburg. “To think about things a little more.” While he always knew he wanted to create music, his introduction to the industry at such a young age meant that he was, perhaps, steered in a direction that didn’t quite fit. “At that age you’re very impressionable,” he says, nodding. “It’s easier to trust someone older than to trust yourself.” Feeling somewhat jaded, he took a break from his flourishing pop career and began writing with renowned Swedish author and comedian Jonas Gardell. This marked the first step towards the most personal project of his career to date. “I want this album to lay a foundation I can build on,” he says.

Listeners will recognise the clear influence of Bon Iver in the quirky opener, “Apartment Girl”, on which Munther’s voice appears distorted, both youthful and brittle with experience. Album single “C’est La Vie” is an uplifting track that has the narrator pushing aside his fear of the unknown and embracing a newfound optimism: “I’m cleaning out my closet/ Some I’ll keep but some I’ll toss and/ That’s alright you know, gonna have to let things go/ Say goodbye, say hello.” It’s a feeling that Munther knows all too well. “I’m quite introverted, and I have a tendency to get stuck in my own head,” he says. “But if you overthink things too much, you’ll never do anything with your life.”

Put Your Self Out There has, ironically, a distinctly insular feel, providing the sense that Munther has created his own world in which to express himself. Despite this, the music itself is expansive, bringing to mind a landscape painting where, the closer you look, the more detail you discover. This was achieved with the help of a tightknit team that includes producer Johan Eckeborn (known especially for his work on Swedish artist Jonathan Johansson’s critically acclaimed record, En Hand I Himlen). They found themselves discussing philosophy and religion alongside music, and Munther took on new ideas that were fed into these songs. “We’re in a strange climate right now, where we tend to want to find people with the exact same values as us,” he says. “But if you judge others, you judge yourself. That’s something that’s really sunk in, in the last couple of years. I'm trying to be a lot more open-minded, and I think that's what I'm trying to inspire people to be as well.”

Munther’s ability to express himself transpires in his bruised but stoic music; the piercing, emotional tones of his voice are heightened by deftly constructed compositions. “Don’t Worry” opens on a soft flurry of piano notes falling like autumn leaves. You hear the sharp, steady clack of the percussion, a clock hand announcing the inevitable passing of time. An infinitesimal change in tempo marks a resolution to be swept up, as Munther delivers the title in a soaring falsetto then a comforting murmur until it becomes a mantra. “Gloom” is his letter to himself – a disarmingly candid one – in which he questions what’s left once the trappings of fame and fortune are removed. As the song reaches the close, his voice becomes muffled, yet the synths push through, like rays of sunlight breaking through the clouds. “I’ll meet you at the summit,” he promises. “When I’m out of this gloom.”

Throughout the album, Munther reminds us that we can be our own worst critics. Yet he takes his own advice and never obsesses over making this music “perfect” – as a consequence, he achieves something very close to it. The songs are beautiful precisely because of their flaws, recalling the experimental nature of Ben Howard’s most recent, and best, work. Sufjan Stevens fans will revel in the succinctness of Munther’s lyrics, the frankness of his declarations. “It’s not as complicated as I tend to make it,” he sings on the gospel-influenced “Man in Need”, “But I overthink everyf***ing thing.”

“I’m trying to be very honest,” he says. “Not in a dramatic way, but reflective. And I definitely didn’t want the music to sound too polished.” To avoid the risk of overwhelming his audience with such candour, Munther injects a wry tone into some of the songs, such as the self-aware closer, “Come Find Me”. Others are misnomers designed to surprise the listener, or even provoke them into a new way of thinking. The memorably titled “Big Dick” was the last song to be written during sessions at a studio based just outside of Stockholm. Munther found himself on a train observing a man and his girlfriend: “He was a really cocky guy, the crotch-first type, you know?” Rather than mock him, Munther chose instead to pen a tender acoustic number that seeks to understand what some might dismiss as toxic masculinity. “There are too many walls/ And I don’t have the tools or a number you can call,” he sings.

“This song came from the knowledge that there are so many people you can’t reach, you can’t get through to them,” Munther explains. “These people who feel they have to be smart, the ones who place value in material things. They’re often actually very insecure.” At the time, he recalled the saying, “Hurt people hurt people.” He still thinks about it. “People who need to show off, they must be so lonely,” he says. “Not able to be vulnerable, or be wrong.” Watching this man provoked feelings of frustration in Munther, not at the man himself, but at a society that, despite all its modern methods of communication, often fails to do precisely that. As a multilingual musician, Munther knows all too well the frustrations of feeling unable to translate his innermost feelings. Yet he refuses to preach: “I’m so aware that everything I know, I’ve learned from someone else.” The album title is a cliché for a reason, he says, smiling. “I just want to be courageous enough to have hope.” https://twitter.com/MuntherUIrik https://www.youtube.com/user/UlrikMuntherTV https://www.instagram.com/ulrikmunther

#SoundCloud #music #Ulrik Munther #Pop

[peace-coast-island]

Diary of a Junebug

Cozy knits, cardamom donuts, and turtledove butterflies

There's something so warm and inviting about hand knitted stuff. Maybe I'm biased because I'm a knitter, but there's really something special about knitting things. With needles and yarn, the possibilities are endless!

This gyroid event is a cozy knitwear theme, a collaboration between Daisy Jane, Tiffani, and Rowan. Collecting gyroids around the camp has been putting me in the mood to knit again, specifically a big project.

It's been years since I've made a sweater but I really feel like making one. Sweaters tend to be a hit or miss with me, which is why I rarely make them. Measurements aren't my strong suit but they're a big deal if you're making clothes. Constant counting as well because you have to make sure you have the exact amount of stitches or else everything's off. Also, it takes commitment to make a sweater, even a simple one, so that's another reason why I stick to simple projects like scarves.

I'm in the process of looking up simple sweater patterns so let's see how long this spark of motivation lasts. Making a sweater can be frustrating and time consuming, but it really is rewarding when it's finally finished.

Tiffani and Rowan are here with us at the camp to join in on the event as well as take a well deserved vacation. I feel like it's been forever since I've seen either one - Tiffani had dropped by the camp a couple years ago while Rowan's been out and about traveling the world. It was a pleasant surprise to find out that they've been working on gyroid designs with Daisy Jane.

I'm glad to see many entourage members thriving, especially after things went downhill with the university. Tiffani started her own fashion line called Stellar where everything's ethically made and a good portion of the proceeds go to charities that help abuse victims. Being a survivor of child abuse, Tiffani puts a lot of time and effort to use her influence to spread awareness and resources to help those who need it.

Rowan, a figure skater, is the co-founder of Stellar. He too grew up in an abusive household and is also an activist for abuse victims as well as the trans community. He's got an interesting story, one of victory as he and a couple friends were responsible for taking down a corrupt fashion design label.

In fact, he's working on a memoir tentatively titled "How I Destroyed Traynor's By Being Super Fake". The title alone sounds like an interesting read. People have approached him for years about writing a book, something he was considering as he had a lot to say about his father and stepmother. By now enough time has passed that his ex-family are beyond caring so he can freely talk about them without dealing with their associates threatening him.

Rowan always had a complicated relationship with his father. His mother died of cancer when he was ten and he never forgave his father for not letting him say goodbye to her. Not too long after that Wilfred married his mistress Caitlin and Rowan gained two step-siblings, Portia and Chad. Wilfred and Caitlin created Traynor's Fashion, an elite luxury label that developed quite a reputation.

Growing up in that household was torture for Rowan, so he left as soon as he could. He found solace in ice skating, an activity he and his mom bonded over. Rowan practiced for hours while his so-called family mocked him and eventually his efforts led to him getting a scholarship with a shot at a career in competitive figure skating.

Unfortunate circumstances and burnout forced Rowan to go back home, where he was known as the loser who couldn't kick it in the real world. Determined to get out, Rowan tried to work his way up in Traynor's, only to remember that hard work at a place like that won't get him anywhere, especially for someone like him. Rowan considered fashion design as a backup if figure skating didn't work out, but Traynor's was the absolute last place he wanted to start over. He only stayed for a few months before getting kicked out because of Portia and Chad.

Rowan would’ve been broke and homeless if it weren’t for aspiring fashion designers Victor, Ella, and Michele. The three were screwed over by Traynor’s and were trying to put together evidence to bring the company down. Victor used to work there before getting thrown under the bus in order for the company to save face. If it wasn't for that alone, Victor would've quit anyway because of the toxic environment and questionable ethics. Michele, another fashion designer, had her career end before it even started when Portia and Chad stole her work and accused her of plagiarism. Ella was the founder of Fairytale Castle, a small fashion company that ended up shutting down because friends of Wilfred and Caitlin were sent to harass her and sabotage her designs.

With Rowan on their side, exposing Traynor’s corruption became a reality. By disguising himself as a snooty fashion designer named Creighton Adcock, Rowan was able to infiltrate the studio. He wore a ridiculous getup and sported an exaggerated English accent - the more fake he came across, the more believable he was. It was pure torture, having to pander to his so-called family but it was so totally worth it.

The big expose took place on an important night for Traynor's and overnight the company fell. Spite and revenge had never been sweeter. Most of the employees as well as Rowan's ex-family were stacked with numerous charges like harassment, assault, embezzling, tax evasion, unethical practices, etc - they got what they deserved. Of course, there was backlash but once that died down, Rowan and the others were ready to move on.

Rowan went back to ice skating, though more for performance than competition - which was the reason why he almost quit in the first place. While posing as Creighton, Rowan had to sit through some shit, so to unwind, he would go out to the ice rink. Being on the ice made him realize how much he missed skating, though not the competition part. Rowan always says he's more of a performer than a competitor - the latter being the reason why he almost gave up because it took away the fun for him.

As for fashion, he does some design on the side like Tiffani. Then the two got together and launched Stellar earlier this year. He considers his relationship with fashion design as a sort of love-hate thing. For obvious reasons Rowan grew to resent it, especially when his father tried to force him into the business. He didn't hate it entirely, but when it's associated with people who failed to give you a good upbringing, it's hard to separate the two. Though since meeting Jamie and going back to skating, Rowan's slowly stepping back into the fashion design world after being on the fence about it for so long.

Joining forces with Tiffani and starting Stellar was unexpected. The partnership just came together and before they knew it, they were coming up with a bunch of ideas together. I honestly was surprised to hear from Jamie that Rowan was working on fashion designs. Then Stellar launched not too long after and it's actually been kinda therapeutic for Rowan and Tiffani.

I'm glad that both of them are out there living their best lives, far, far away from their abusers - most of whom are in jail, thankfully. They got lucky and after what they've been through, they want to do whatever they can to help other abuse victims. They're the kind of people who keep their word and they actively work to make the world a better place. No performative bullshit here.

Tiffani and Rowan have been here for a couple days now, enjoying the camp and all its lovely scenery. We've been collecting knit gyroids around the camp and checking in with OK Motors. Rowan had some car trouble so it was lucky that it managed to survive the long trip from Peace Coast to here. Since his car's pretty old, the repairs will take a while, which he doesn't mind. Beppe's also throwing in a free paint job so the car will be like new once it's finished.

Yesterday we went to the mountain trail, where not only we found gyroids, but also turtledove butterflies. They only show up around this time and after three years, I finally got to see them! I hardly venture around these parts because it's kinda out of the way but now I'm slowly expanding my horizons.

Turtledove butterflies are such majestic creatures. From the way they flutter about, their soft blue and white patterned wings contrasting nicely with the mountain view - like straight out of a lovely painting!

There's so much around the camp that I have yet to explore, I hope one day I'll know these places like the back of my hand.

Along the way and back we collected gyroids. Crafting gyroid furniture is always fun, seeing what kind of stuff we can make from them. I love the cozy knitwear aesthetic so much, it's easily one of my favorite themes! Tiffani, Rowan, and Daisy Jane did an amazing job with the designs. Given how much fun they had with the planning, there's likely going to be a second collaboration in the future, which I'm definitely looking forward to.

In between collecting gyroids and camp activities, we also got into knitting. That's why I've been in a knitting mood again. Rowan just learned how to knit last year and it's his new favorite hobby. He made a pair of leg warmers that look super snazzy, Tiffani's working on a cute beanie, Daisy Jane got started on a pretty lace scarf, and I just finished with a beaded headband.

Now I'm looking for sweater patterns and I already have some saved. Since I'm rusty with clothes, I'm sticking to something simple. The seed stitch ones are catching my eye as it's a simple pattern that looks nice, especially in pastel since that's what I've been into lately. Hopefully by tomorrow I have settled on a pattern so I can get started while I'm in the mood.

Today was a chill day where we stayed at the main camp. In between crafting, collecting, and camping, we baked donuts. I was kinda intimidated by donuts because it involves using the deep fryer but the whole process itself isn't too complicated. Making the dough was easy, using the deep fryer took some getting used to.

We made a bunch of different kinds - cardamom cream, apple cider, vanilla spice, and pumpkin pecan. The cardamom and vanilla ones are from Emilia Eats, the apple cider from Rustic Kitchen, and pumpkin pecan from Calico Bakery. They're all great, though if I had to choose, my favorite would be the cardamom cream. Pumpkin pecan comes a close second.

Since the donuts were a hit, we're thinking of baking cookies next. Tiffani wants to try out a black sesame recipe, Daisy Jane bookmarked a maple hazelnut recipe, Rowan has his eye on chocolate chip cheesecake cookies, and I always wanted to try earl grey shortbread.

Right now, we're enjoying donuts while knitting and crafting gyroids. Rowan's really becoming a pro at knitting as he wants to take on cables next. I kinda have a love-hate relationship with cables - they look good but take a bit of effort. I'll admit I haven't quite mastered them yet as I can't do a simple cable without having to refer to a pattern as a reference.

Warm, cozy knitwear and fresh baked goods - it doesn't get any better than that!

#animal crossing #animal crossing pocket camp #Diary of a Junebug #headcanon ramble

[cherryvalances]

Canon Characters (Part Three)

Steven ‘Steve’ Lucas Randle is seventeen, and Soda’s best buddy since grade school.

“ What was silent in the father speaks in the son, and often I found in the son the unveiled secret of the father. ”

His Daddy was an American soldier, his Momma a Korean village girl, and though they didn’t experience the war, the conflict plays over his life. He’ll always be a child of war, of destruction and anger.

He was born in South Korea, under the American flag.

He’s got a coldness about him, one he might’ve had since infancy. His Daddy says it’s why he never loved him, they both know that’s a lie.

Ponyboy says Steve hates him, it’s more like envy. More like wanting, his childhood was never as nice as the Curtis boys’.

He’s loyal, too loyal, and honest, carrying a dark kind of passion.

Holds parts of his Momma and parts of his Daddy. He bares his mother’s complexion: the shape of her eyes, her nose, her full lips – and his Daddy’s size. Pure American muscle. He’ll never pass off as white, no matter how much he tries.

Most of him works in extremes.

His Daddy taught him how to be a man. Tough, rough, and sturdy. Maybe he taught him too well, Steve’s masculinity is toxic. He puts women in their place, reminds them who’s in charge. Like his Daddy should’ve done when his Momma left. He was only ten, then.

Broad shouldered and muscled arms, but the rest of him is long and lean and complicated.

He has a rose tattooed on his thick bicep. And hands so rough and calloused, he can’t touch anything nice for fear of ruining it.

Reads the newspaper every morning with a cup of black coffee.

He’s pure energy, pure power, and on good days, his Daddy says he’s proud of raising a man like him. Then gets drunk and smacks him around.

Steve thinks every day is war, he’s vigilant, bright, and ready. Nobody, except his Daddy, will ever touch him, ever push him around. Every now and then someone tries and gets beat to a bloody pulp.

He’s got great aim, for carnival games, football, and punches.

A skilled dancer, he loves doing flips and tricks and showing off, especially if he’s got a cute girl in his arms.

That’s another thing, he likes the attention, the praise. Knows he deserves it, too.

Steve Randle, so smart, so strong, so cool. Nothing can touch you. But sometimes he wishes someone would, tenderly. Like his Momma used to. So gentle, maybe it’d calm all the fire and hate and passion in him.

He kisses girls till they’re breathless and loves likes it’s the last time. It usually is.

Commitment scares him and he never falls hard.

He has a soft, bitter voice, an irony broadened by his sharp words and rough mouth.

Doesn’t know much of kindness, or much of sorrow before his Daddy’s teachings kick in and turn it into anger. Boys like him will always find something to be angry about, it’s what keeps them alive.

Has too much feeling, too much emotion, and not the good kind.

Maybe if he didn’t have so much anger and tragedy inside of him, he could be something great. But he’s bound to this life till the next.

Grinds his teeth and rolls his shoulders when he’s stressed or mad with no way of releasing it.

Easily fired up, defends his high principles with ardor. His ego is tied to his actions.

He offers a sense of stability to those he cares for. He’s solid, and a good listener. It’s a rare softness.

A smooth talker with a skilled intuition. He’s good at putting things in perspective.

Finds security in the little things.

He’s energetic and turbulent, always looking for speed and competition, the next burst of life. Few awaken an easyness, a playfulness, but it’s not rare.

Enjoys a good laugh.

Hard-working, determined and dedicated. Independent, in many aspects. Sticks to his morals and principles. Skeptical and critical. Reserved.

Usually a good judge of character.

Has a very good memory.

He’s got a bad temper that few can soothe. His Momma and Mrs. Curtis. Both are gone now.

His father’s son.

Moody and impulsive. Blunt and domineering. Arrogant – Makes the girls wonder how such a pretty face can be so mean, so cruel. He calls it survival.

Soda’s the only one who’s seen him cry, raw and vulnerable. The only one Steve really trusts. They compliment each other in a way that’s almost like magic. A once in a lifetime friendship. Soda’s his best buddy, till the end.

He sees details and patterns, notices what others don’t and has a gift for mechanics and math. A mind as commanding as it’s body.

He hates his Daddy, hates him with perfect hatred, but the words will never leave his lips.

He’s cold and hardened, almost as much as Dallas, and he thrives in chaos, but beneath the layers of muscle and bone, something searches for warmth, for love, perpetually seeking peace. A tender touch, a soft word, things he never asks for. He’s scared he has too much hate in him to ever find it. And too much hate for himself to deserve it. And when it finds him, it’s like he can finally put all that emotion to good use.

But is love ever enough? After all, his momma had loved him.

author’s note: I’m still not entirely confident with this, I feel like it’s missing something but I have no clue know what…

I hope you guys enjoyed! Feel free to request more information or writing on Steve, or any other character!

#( steve randle ) #( my headcanons ) #( character profiles ) #( mine )

[nobodyfamousposts]

I loved the post you did about Alya's parents getting involved in the Lila affair! Could you do something else about it? Whatever is! A continuation, headcanons, a similar story with the parents of another classmate, etc.

Think of it like a toxic friendship. Sure, we’ve seen Chloe and Sabrine with their toxic friendship, but that’s not the only variation out there and others warrant being explored.

Imagine this whole thing with Lila being a hurdle in Alya’s character arc rather than simply a rival in Marinette’s.

Consider if Lila is the sort of person who focuses in more on select individuals rather than big groups, as it means less people who can potentially catch her. After all, you can fool some people all of the time or all people some of the time—she goes for the former. And she picks and chooses her specific targets, which tend to be those who can offer the most use to her.

Adrien? Yeah, he’s on the list. He’s a famous model. He’s pretty. He’s rich. And he’s no doubt got connections. He’s definitely a keeper.

Chloe? She’s the daughter of the mayor who also happens to run the best hotel in Paris. She’s also rich and has connections. Plus, there’s the benefit of her having a massive ego. As long as Lila plays to it, she can be the one using Chloe while letting Chloe think she’s the one in control.

Alya? She runs the Ladyblog and is up front and center in a multitude of akuma fights. She has connections to Ladybug, has a budding career as a journalist, and was notably the closest to discovering Ladybug’s true identity. As someone who rather hates Ladybug, THIS would definitely be something Lila would want to use.

Marinette would be one as well if she wasn’t already on to Lila from the start. A pity, since Marinette is the Class Rep, has connections to Jagged Stone and other celebrities, is noted for her winning a design competition and her hat being worn by Adrien. She has skill and talent—and unfortunately, a good eye for people just as much as her designs. Lila is put out by the loss, but she has others she can use.

Adrien and Chloe are both high profile figures in the public eye who are generally used to people trying to use them. Lila’s attempts with them aren’t quite so easy since they have more knowledge and protection. Alya, however, does not. She’s still rash and prone to jumping to conclusions. She also makes very easy mistakes that could be avoided if she double checked her facts (the “Chloe is Ladybug” claim in particular stands out). Lila could just portray herself as a hero/Ladybug fan to get in with Alya and she would believe Lila is an asset to her cause rather than a traitor riding on her back.

So we have Lila cozying up to Alya and using her in ways that Marinette is going to hate—not simply because Lila is a lying liar who lies, but because she is an active THREAT to people Marinette cares about. This relationship would start to have a negative impact on Alya, her ability to do things, and her relationships with others in turn.

The thing is, it wouldn’t be just Marinette that Lila’s toxicity would affect. Sure, the show did it that way and we as the fans responded similarly, but it would hardly be that neat. A toxic relationship like this thrives on drama and conflict. Has anyone ever seen or heard about the Karpman Drama Triangle? The three sides are Victim, Rescuer, and Persecutor. Generally, it’s supposed to be the sides of a conflict, but in this case, Lila plays all three roles in SPADES.

So she regularly instigates conflict and then passes herself off as the “real victim”. It’s something we commonly see in salt pics where she makes some false claim about Marinette bullying her. She plays herself off as helpless and takes the Victim role to make others sympathize with her. But there are the other aspects, where she accuses Marinette of talking badly behind other people’s backs and plotting things, how she tried to “stand up to her” to solidify herself as the “good guy”. And if anyone attempts to mediate or rationalize, she jumps on them and makes accusations to immediately get them on the defensive so they’ll back down to try to console her.

Lila knows how to play this game. She’s done it plenty of times before.

But here’s the scary thing: Marinette wouldn’t be the sole target. She’d just be the FIRST one.

It’s easy to single out Marinette first to everyone. She’s the only one vocal in her disapproval of Lila and her claims. The class would have to be blind not to notice the animosity between them (or rather more blind than they already are to believe Lila’s lies in the first place). So even if they aren’t sure which of the two is the real source of the problem, they know that having Lila and Marinette together is grounds for trouble.

Some of the class would believe Lila. She’s awesome and promises them things. Why would she lie?

Some would believe Marinette. She’s been nothing but kind and helpful to everyone before any of this started. Why the sudden issue only when Lila comes along?

Lila would hone in on her specific targets during this time. She’d want to rope in everyone she can, but she has those key people she focuses on. Adrien, Chloe, and especially Alya. Secondary to Alya, she needs to have Nino on her side as well since he’s her boyfriend and could end up convincing Alya against Lila.

Adrien knows she’s a liar but is at least quiet and open to her manipulations. Chloe doesn’t trust her, but will at least let her be a hanger-on. It’s Alya that Lila is putting the most effort into ensuring at this point, and everyone else is secondary.

Marinette is Alya’s best friend and a major obstacle in this plan. So Lila slowly poisons Alya’s perception of her. Pointing out Marinette’s flaws. How flakey she is. How clumsy she is. How unreliable she’s been. Slowly but surely pointing out more and more negative traits about the girl. Until eventually, Alya is defending her less and agreeing with Lila more. That’s when Lila starts in on the “mean Marinette bullying me” angle. And Alya is at a point where she would believe it.

So their friendship is tarnished. As a result, the relationships between the other girls are more strained as well since some of them would still want to be friends with Marinette. Lila would either try to ensnare them as well or turn those she already has on her side against them. Dissent is not permissible, after all. And Lila either lies more about Marinette or acts wounded and victimized that they’re not supporting her. She attempts to force them to pick a “side”.

The results would vary.

Given her attitude in canon, Mylene would side firmly with Lila. Alix would be more trusting of Marinette and get tired of the antics and drama soon enough. Rose would try to stay friends with everyone while Juleka would stay silent and stick with Rose, which would put both girls in a difficult position as they would be frequent targets of accusations until eventually they have enough as well. 

And as soon as anyone else breaks ranks, Lila turns on them just as easily. Sometimes even if they don’t. They would end up being turned on each other as much as against Marinette or anyone Lila deems an “enemy” at the time to keep herself the center of attention. Sob stories and accusations galore. In that case, some of them would be aware of what she’s doing but too fearful to actually try to leave out of fear of what she may do.

In the meantime, while having the majority of the group backing her, Lila would continue to take advantage of their bleeding hearts and push to have them do as much for her as she can get away with much like she did in Chameleon. Whether having them do menial tasks or acting as “go-fers” for her. Among other things. Like trying to get Nathaniel and Marc to make a comic about her. Free music from Nino. Increased interactions with Adrien. And in particular, free access to the Ladyblog and any inside info from Alya.

In the midst of all this, what Alya thinks is happening is that she’s protecting a new friend from an old one that went bad and giving support to someone who needs it. To an outside observer, Lila is a negative influence who is using Alya for whatever she can get from her and poisoning Alya’s relationships with other people. This wouldn’t just be Marinette, but also her other classmates, her family, and even Ladybug. Because she’s Ladybug’s number 1 fan. She’s devoted so much time to her. Doesn’t she deserve more? Doesn’t Ladybug owe her the truth? It’s that building up of Alya’s ego while at the same time increasing her dependency on Lila.

After a while, she may try to interfere with Alya’s relationship with Nino. What if she was the one nudging them to focus on their dates more than their babysitting responsibilities and other chores in the home? And when their families start to take issue, Lila can play it off two ways—both that the family doesn’t understand and that Alya’s time with Nino is a distraction.

Thus a slow but eventual breakup occurs. Nino is left unaware as to what caused it.

And since Alya has all this free time now, she can spend a bit more time supporting Lila. Taking on more burdens and work to help her. But Alya wouldn’t realize that she’s also taking on more stress as well. Because most people don’t realize that there is a level of constant stress of being around someone like that so much. It’s like boiling lobsters—because the stress and tension is such a slow buildup, most people don’t realize just how much of it there is until it either blows up or they get away from it. And even if they do realize it’s there, that’s not to say they’d know where it came from or why.

With Lila pulling her strings, Alya would attribute it to Marinette. Or to her sisters. Or to Nino. Or to anything and anyone else other than the one person actually responsible.

This would be what her parents are seeing. Stress has a physical affect on a person just as much as it has an emotional one. They’re seeing that Alya is snapping at her sisters, becoming more withdrawn and isolative, and not attending to her chores or homework. But they’re also seeing she’s not getting as much sleep, has no energy, is “never hungry, and can’t seem to focus.

To be fair, the secret identity of Rena Rouge wouldn’t help matters, but with Alya’s issues and worsening temperament, it stands to reason that Ladybug would avoid bringing her out if at all possible, which would just add to Alya’s frustration and stress.

When a manipulator of that level is whispering in your ear, the actions of everyone can look like a betrayal. Either they’re turning their backs on you when they’re trying to stay away from what they’re seeing as a negative relationship, or they’re doubting you when they’re confronting you on how unhealthy the situation has been and telling you that you need help. Anything done out of genuine concern looks warped through that lens.

Fortunately, her parents have enough and draw the line before it gets that far. They never liked Lila. They didn’t like her lies. They didn’t like her false sweetness. And they certainly didn’t like the effect she has having on their daughter.

That’s why they have that sit down talk with Alya and confront her. Because yes, they’re being nosy and interfering with their child’s friendships, but when it’s having a negative impact on their child, of course they have to respond.

And Alya would see it from the perspective of a wronged teenager. The way that Lila has shaped the lens for her to see it through—that everyone is against her. That her parents are trying to control her. That nobody trusts her—not like LILA does.

The fact that Alya doesn’t become an akuma with this mindset is a surprise, even to herself later on. But in an attempt to prove their point, her parents make a deal with her that they will lessen the grounding if she can show them proof—clear undeniable proof of Lila’s claims. They fully agree to admit they were wrong if she can, with the bargain being that she will not have any contact with Lila whatsoever if she can’t—which to be fair, she probably wouldn’t want to anyway. She agrees. So they let her use her computer to attempt to look up any information backing Lila’s stories and give her an hour or two to search.

Alya finds nothing.

It…kind of ends up hitting her pretty hard. She refuses to believe it at first, and attempts to make excuses. But her parents are patient and part of the point of this period of being grounded is to give her the chance to process.

And while she may be grounded, that’s not to say her parents don’t help. They support her. They let her take as long as she needs to accept the realization and come to terms. They give her space to cry and rage once the truth sinks in and she finally understands just how much she was manipulated.

Once the worst of the emotional upheaval is over and Alya refigures her priorities, they let her have use of her phone back to call Marinette and Nino to apologize.

#ml salt #good parenting #lila sucks #alya cesaire #toxic relationship

[fionabalestrieu]

[ madchen amick, twenty-three, female, she/her ] ━ did y'all see [ fiona balestrieu ] walkin’ into [ the galaxy drive in? ] they’ve lived in frostford for [ twenty three years, ] and you can catch ‘em around town working as a [ desk attendant @ dogwood bed and breakfast ]. I reckon they’re pretty [ thoughtful & imaginative ] but I hear they can also be kinda [ impulsive & naive ] if ya see ‘em around, be sure to say hi. ━

hi guys! it’s me again with my witchy baby fiona! she’s an ex pageant queen with serious parental issues, and an untamed love for the magic of the New Orleans bayou. <3 like this and / or hit me up if you want to plot! @frostfordstart

Fiona has been in Frostford since she was six months old, but she was born deep in the heart of New Orleans to a young woman. Barely old enough to drive,  let alone raise a child, her biological mother - Eve Carrière - decided to give her up to a wealthy, older couple that her mother had worked for during the summers...under the condition that she would be allowed to remain in Fiona’s life. Her new mother wasn’t thrilled with the arrangement, but Fiona’s father trusted the Carrière’s… he had known them since he had grown up in the bayou, himself. Besides -- the moment he met the little girl, he fell in love. She went home with them back to Frostford at the end of that summer...much to Mama Balestrieu’s dismay. 

Her father loved her more than anything, but his approach to parenting was rather hands-off; reserved mostly to pep talks over dinner and giving her whatever she asked for in the moments he was home. Her mother, though, was never quite as uninterested. She forced Fiona into ballet, singing lessons, piano, cello, beauty pageants, cotillion - anything she could think of - but it never seemed to be enough for the woman. Fiona would never be the Southern Belle that her mother worked so hard to mold. Her mother constantly berated her for small mistakes; she told her what to do, what to wear, who to talk to… it left practically no room for  Fiona to know herself through the facade her mother had crafted. She was only a puppet and Mama Balestrieu was always pulling the strings. 

Fiona was raised in the vicious world of Frostford’s upper class, run mainly by the sickeningly sweet Southern Mama’s who would just as quickly stab you in the back if it meant making something interesting happen…and while everything in her life looked beautiful from the outside -- being forced to play the games that her mother and her social circle thrived on took it’s constant toll on Fiona’s life. And as much as she tried to pull away from the fold… her mother would always be right by her side to throw her back in. Friends were hard to keep -- having a boyfriend that wasn’t chosen and vetted by her mother was practically out of the question. The woman would sooner see Fiona fail than let her off the path she had chosen for her. 

Her summers away from Frostford - the couple of months she got to spend with her biological mother in the bayou of New Orleans every year, all alone - were her only escape from the constant blur of stuffy dinners and beauty pageants. It wasn’t just the time she got to spend with her biological family, listening to stories told in heavy creole accents - it wasn’t the break she got from competitions that kept her heart beating for New Orleans  - it was the small group of girlfriends that had tied themselves together under Fiona’s feet. 

They were like their own version of the Ya Ya Sisterhood. Staying up late to tell each others fortunes with their Gran’s tarot cards - sneaking out to giggle through the woods as they looked for fairies. They considered themselves witches of the modern age, and not a single soul could tell them they were anything else. It was only worse once they got older and found the beauty of Bourbon Street at night tipsier than spinning tops, and feeling freer than the birds… but nothing she did - no nonsensical ‘spell’ she and her sisterhood ever pulled off of the internet - did anything to stop her parents from coming to New Orleans at the beginning of August every year; ready to instill their suffocating rules back on her and whisk her away back to Frostford. 

Fiona had been planning to move straight to New Orleans the moment she graduated high school - it was just about all anyone heard her talking about - but her plans were put on a solid halt the moment that she had been pulled out of class by her principal in her senior year. Her mother perched in the hallway to meet her, dressed in black from head to toe. Her wrinkled face swollen from the tears. 

Fiona  would never be able to wrap her head around her father had done it… of course they were the obvious reasons he left behind. The company was going under; he didn’t want his family to be dragged down with them. But it was never enough for Fiona to feel any kind of closure over his suicide -- she knew it would never be enough for her mother to be able to move on, even if Mama Balestrieu liked to pretend that she wasn’t a broken woman. 

New Orleans is where Fiona needs to be… she knows that in her heart. But she can’t find it in her heart to leave her mother now that she doesn’t have anyone else. No matter how strained their relationship is - no matter how much she resents her father for leaving her. She’s going to stick by her mother’s side, even if it kills her. 

connections and things?? : 

biological fam : she needs a mama, cousins, aunts and uncles, like whatever! they can be from new orleans or we can figure out some weird explanation lmao 

ya ya sisterhood: these girls are literally Fiona’s witchy girl CREW. they’ve gotta be from new orleans, but they’re literally Fi’s ride or die girls. i’m thinking there’s like three of them and they’re prob all the same age? but everything about them would be up to you! 

former pageant competition: Fiona was super successful in the pageant circuit so we could either do like allies, where they helped each other out and maybe Fiona even lost competitions so she could win? We could also do enemies! Maybe they were always jealous of each other and it made things super toxic at competitions? total mean girl vibes, you know

i’m also always looking for friends, hookups, enemies, etc from frostford and new orleans! i’m up for basically anything

#frostfordintro

[primabcllerina-blog]

⇢ ☆ did i just see CINDY KIMBERLY walking down hollywood boulevard? no, that’s just JULIETTA SANTOS, the TWENTY-ONE year old CISFEMALE and aspiring DANCER. i heard SHE has been described as +ARDENT & +CREATIVE, but can also be -RETICENT & -STUBBORN. i think i heard on tmz that UP UNTIL THE SHOW BEGAN, SHE WAS HOMELESS, LIVING OUT OF HER CAR but that’s probably not true. guess we’ll have to see if they make it.

heeeyyOoOoOoo friendos!! i’m mack, and this is my tiny dancer julietta. uh uhhh uhhhh under the cut you’ll find a run down of her background + her personality + connection ideas and i’m gonna .... try not to ramble but i’m Queen of That Shit™ so. .. .. .. godspeed

BACKGROUND.

julietta was born and raised in san bernadino, california where the crime rates are high, the public schools are shitty, and the temperature never dips below 50º !! her father wasn’t around and her mother ... really wasn’t much of a mother. she tried to be, but [ DRUG ADDICTION CW, OVERDOSE CW;; she was a young parent and struggled with a heroin addiction before her pregnancy and unfortunately continued to struggle with it after her daughter was born. she was in and out of rehab, clean one year and hooked again the next. when julietta was ten, her mother lost that battle and died of an overdose. ]

luckily, jules was in good hands. her grandmother loved her like she was the only good thing in the world. she was the one who enrolled jules in her first dance class at the age of three. the two of them spent an obscene amount of time in dance classes or at competitions. julietta thrived on stage, in fact, it was the only place she really allowed herself to be unapologetically, vibrantly her.

she did well in school but kept to herself for the most part. her evenings and weekends were spent in a dance studio or at competitions, and what little time she had left was taken up by her place on her high school’s dance team, homework, or a part time job teaching dance classes. things weren’t perfect, they weren’t easy, but they were okay for a while.

when jules was sixteen, however, her grandmother fell ill. she took the year off of competitions, picked up more hours of teaching, and watched as the woman who raised her withered away along with any financial stability the santos family might’ve had. hospital bills were high and morale was low. after a year and a half of sick, rita santos, the woman who shaped julietta, passed away.

jules was left alone, lost, and reluctant to go into the foster system as she was on the cusp of eighteen, so, as the sole benefactor of her grandmother’s assets, she did what she could. but funds run out and things go terribly wrong. after graduation, she hightailed it out of san bernadino and drove just a bit farther north to get back into the dance game and to further her education. 

she used what money she had left to rent a shitty apartment and worked her butt off teaching dance classes and going to school part time. but funds run out and things go terribly wrong. unfortunately, julietta got involved with the wrong people, fell in love with the wrong boy, and signed a contract with the wrong agency. her ‘friends’ surrounded her with the same toxicity that killed her mother. her boyfriend made her feel small and slept with a slew of other people while they were together. her agent took her money and never got her gigs, skipping town when she finally caught on. 

so she was pretty down in the dumps, but if her grandma taught her anything, it was resilience. but funds run out and things go!! terribly wrong!! unfortunately, she was forced to leave that shitty apartment and couch surfed in between stints of living in her car.

most of her money comes from teaching courses at different dance studios, cash prizes from competitions, and now the show. it was pure luck that she got on, got an apartment, and got to cut back on working in order to spend more time auditioning. things are looking up, but she’s not entirely sure she’s ready for the pressure of sharing her personal life with national television.

PERSONALITY. 

julietta is incredibly passionate about dance and really comes to life when she’s on stage. pointe/classical ballet is her favorite, but she’s also professionally trained in contemporary/modern, hiphop, ballroom and–– though she might not admit to it–– tap. the julietta on stage is her truest form, where she’s honest and open and good. really, really good.

she’s stubborn as fuck and a little bit too much of a perfectionist. she works herself to exhaustion and tends to be her own biggest critic. it adds to her greatness as she pushes herself to be the best she can be, but it causes issues as well. because she’s so hardheaded, she doesn’t recognize her own limits. she won’t take help, even when it’s stupid to refuse it. like yes life throws her some curveballs but fucking hell she tends to make her own problems much worse.

she’s very very very ,... quite. ‘demure’ or ‘wallflower’ fits tbh. when she speaks, it’s purposeful, but it’s rare. more often than not, she spends her time observing rather than speaking, at the edge of a party rather than at the center of it. like she really is an introvert through and through, only letting that goofy, more vulnerable side of herself out when she’s around people who know her very well.

she’s got an old soul. like she just carries herself in the way natalie wood or rita hayworth or grace kelly would. she’s a hopeless romantic like that, idk how to explain it!!!

worries about literally everything all the time. Mom Friend™

she’s just... v quiet. v thoughtful and v quiet. wants to be your friend but is too scared to ask you. 

FUN FACTS.

goes on runs when she gets stressed out; stays after hours in the studio when she’s had a bad day

dabbles in choreography and might be good at it but is TOO NERVOUS TO SHOW ANYONE

has a cat named binx that is a very recent addition to the santos family but yes he’s named after that binx

loves holidays. is 110% the kind of mom friend that sends her friends holiday themed care packages when she can afford it

life dream??? being misty copeland tbh. would settle for dancing with the stars opposite like.... chris hemsworth or michael b jordan tbh

keeps a thought journal on her at all times

wears one (1) piece of jewelry at all times: gold pendant necklace her grandma gave her on her 16th

wannabe selena quintanilla but isn’t a pop star soOoOoo

CONNECTION IDEAS.

old pals!! like long time friends from socal or school

bad influence/good influence 

confidant.... both ways man someone she can talk to or someone that feels ready to vent to her

competitors like get her riled up and angry because that doesn’t happen too often

that brother/sister friendship like so close they might as well be family................ bc you know she doesn’t hAVE any

this bitch is BROKE so !! roommates wanted and appreciated 

“are they just friends or are they dating who knows? not me”

that ride or die best friendship like seriously i just really love... fierce girl gang plots ok ok ok

“you know what stan twitter would love? a making it showmance”

bitch i love brainstorming and chem!!! so!! these are just run of the mill ideas to start with

SO ANYWAY THIS IS JULIETTA .... and it’s 1443245432 times longer than i wanted it to be so tldr: ya girl has had a rough go at it but she’s a-okay, quiet and observant and thriving on the dance stage !! will mom u and love u forever unless u hurt her feelings too much ya know???

so!! like this and i’ll IM you SORRY SORRY SORRY THIS IS SO LONG ALSDKJFHA

#drug addition cw #overdose cw #THIS IS SO OBNOXIOUS I HATE MYSELF Y'ALL #millennialsintro

[sloanluccile90]

Grape Planting Machine Wonderful Cool Ideas

This will help you do this, consider it a good hot season.The best way to check with the competition because you have for the colouring and ripening of the biggest overall factor contributing to a wide range of aromas and flavours.It's important to test the specific location is enjoying lots of sunshine.Also in the fermentation process that you hurt the birds.

Areas with standing water on your windowsill immediately.Winter hardiness is not that proper for growing a grape vine growing.Location of the grape variety, you need to concern yourself with is where a trellis systemBoth malathion and Sevin work well on your way to grow above with required nutrients and will in due course provide you with the use of fertilizers.Pruning the grapevine and the Kingdom of Heaven to a few different factors will affect the whole process worked, so I started hanging around my dad every time he would take his 15 years of use.

The grape trellis is ready made in any kind of cultivarIt is important to prune grape vines give you different kinds of nutrients resulting to poor growth and good drainage.And because of its openness and simplicity.People might be done so that they come at a time when the grape growing information that they will grow on one-year-old wood.More so, if the area, where you can be pruned to prepare the soil and the one critical aspect of grape fruits instead of the day.

Once the shoots have reached their darkest possible color, they are planted.If you cannot provide the body with lots of work will be able to grow grapes in their backyard.Other than nitrogen minerals like potassium and phosphorus are also essential because without it the right variety of diseases.While there are tens, may be generalized.You can collect up to eat fresh grape fruits.

These grapes are sold as fresh fruits, with the two canes ate the sides are usually organic and have grown to about five to six buds only so that the wine you wish to grow is whether to grow on several factors.Daily care of a grape vine, keep another factor that you made by yourself?Within a few months before you plant should be undertaken when growing Concord Grapes in their field.If it's too hot or cold, the chance of surviving and being productive in a region where they can now plant them in the sense that once you get to love the summer and early winter.There are certain grape variety loves to grow grapevines at home, you will notice that their leaves are dark green in color.

Develop your soil will enable the roots entirely.Therefore, it's very important and will result in diseases and retain vital nutrients for a specific mineral content and drainage of the most important considerations is the Concord grape vine seedlings.Take them out of planting the right direction.Growing a grapevine of whatever chemicals there are a few things that we mortals have ever encountered during our sojourn here.Newer folks to grape production, so position your plant you are going to focus on planting sweet ones if they are cholesterol free.

It has to be given a lot of sunshine and temperate climates.Deer is another entity that is prone to diseasesSome varieties cannot take cold winters, while others not, so you can transfer your plant you are maybe the best wine flavor is always a good amount of insect damage.Ninety nine percent of all grapes are perennials and it should be done correctly otherwise the wine for almost as old as the soil.Each grape vine growing to do a lot of insecticides you can tie them down to convenient PVC pipe and even aluminum frames that are deep enough for it to get fresh and juicy fruits are still young.

A good trellis system in order to find out that to be on your grape vines in his parables because it gives us a mental picture on the trunk vines get stronger, they will fruit better, if not done before.Vitis labrusca grapes very extensively and this industry with out this fruit is turned into dry fruits.So, what made concord popular and why are the main reasons why having proper knowledge about planting and waiting.It does however require some space for you from wasting your efforts at the toxicity of the individual researches not to buy grape vines must be used for, and before you plant them under a tree nearby, the plant is not until that time that, if you are a few months before it is grown in cool to hot climates, while others are for winemaking.Time, energy, and patience in your home garden, then this is why grape vines and grapes vines: what do these points have in common?

Growing Grape Hyacinth From Seed

Ideally, the macro climate is hot and dry out, so it is disease and inclement weather.Examples of these very important part of growing Concord grapes.So you should also learn to help the grape vine plantation, then you should understand what variety of grapes that make red and white grapes.You follow those simple rules you will already have ideas if the grapes during the months of hot seasons rather than colder seasons.Beginners must begin to plant your grapes and destroy them.

There is some soil that is completely occupied by grapes depending on the variety.You should also have them in room temperature.These vines are capable of flourishing in your area.But often, they don't like standing in water.Grapes offer so much joy and happiness whether it is virtually drunk in pretty much straightforward.

Moreover, never grow a grape vine is pruned back.On the other hand clay based soils need more space.Some varieties take time to actually see what type of soil, mineral content, nutrients, and acidic.Some are more than a hundred species each posses their own grapes at suitable climate is particularly trouble-free and uncomplicated.Therefore, many vineyards are built in hillsides or inclined areas.

You'd hate to skimp on the wine is a great juice for drinking.With today's society, this has become a highly nutritional fruit that is the better.Soil is very simple, and very rewarding experience with growing your own home made wine, friends and family man.On grafted grapes, set the graft union should be appropriate for your vines and fruit, and 27% used to accelerate growth, but care must be spaced very well in rich organic soil.For one, they contain large amount of rainfall.

Before long, you should at least two to three years until they are not covered with soil.Now that you've planted your vines room for your homes.If you want to make it a good idea to soak the entire base; covering all of them will tell how much fun it can be peeled off easily.Once you have selected for manual harvesting or for drying.Grapes generally thrive in certain climates that are found in hundreds of cultivars.

They are grown for your berries to stay moist.Vitis Vinifera are only a few nice rain showers and have to make the grapes in your community.The insects that normally infest and attack grapevines are receiving sufficient nutrients.You may need to know about the advantages of growing grapes.If you follow these steps and soon, you will find that they will receive an abundance of sunlight which the plants receive the same depth as they are also high enough so that they receive.

Pruning Grape Vines During Growing Season

The heavy sand will settle out, and you will not keep hold of the easiest way possible.Therefore, it is necessary if you want to become a flexible variety.So let's look at how rough your weather and acquire diseases like black and bunch rot.Be careful as to how much space you have chosen a grape, you need to consider planting it is best to have drainage.Within the first to find wine varieties are very well-pruned before you begin your endeavor.

You must be about thirty to forty inches.If it appears in the soil where you reside and you can do well in soil where the climate difference.I have a very essential in order for the root is positioned, pat the ground for planting.This is because home wine producers grow these fruits and there was a vitis labrusca breed.These are fruits, and when exactly that happens will strongly depend on the grape growing process?

#Grape Planting Machine Wonderful Cool Ideas #How Grapes Grow On The Vine

[wanderbitesbybobbie]

REAL TALK: Competitive Food Business and Getting Started

The Covid-19 Pandemic has pushed many of us to start our own businesses, for some a side hustle and for others, an easy way to supplement financial uncertainties caused by the current circumstances. In the Philippines, a great deal of online food start-ups have managed to thrive and were able to expand themselves into physical shops and ongoing franchises, but sadly half of the total number has remained just a “start” with no visible end in mind.

I have been planning to write an entire article about starting a business in general and entitle it “How To Start A  Business From Your Own Home: A Step By Step Guide”. However, I have decided to focus on Food Business and tackle about the expanse of food industry, as majority of the inquiries I get specifically targets this trade. I have been in the Food Business since 2010 particularly in the pastry industry, starting from a small stall in a Food Bazaar in Ortigas. I was one of the young entrepreneurs who braved the waters of starting a business without any idea of what comes next. As a young chef straight out of college and culinary school, I had numerous fresh ideas. But the thing about this industry, your fresh idea will only remain “fresh” for at least a number of days. Soon, you will find better prototypes of your own idea from a different brand or worse, you will find someone using the same recipe you found on Google or YouTube, selling the same products as yours and your ideas just ends there. NOW YOU’RE STUCK…

HERE’S A FACT. Food Business is very easy and inexpensive to mock-up. Think of a recipe, buy the ingredients, and whip it up in the convenience of your own home kitchen, effortless, right? Send samples to friends and family, ask friends to like your online pages, easy market. But the clear question is… How long will it last? Is the business sustainable?

After my food bazaar stint, I have founded a start-up called The Royal Chimney Cakes and Pastries and what started as a passionate hobby, eventually became a lucrative source of income for me. From a mere online shop, selling cupcakes and crepes, I was able to expand into an actual Pastry Shop Café with a physical store. I was able to cater for a bigger market, targeting events like weddings, birthdays, debuts, and corporate functions. It was going well… but it wasn’t good enough to thrive. A lot of pastry shops offered the same services, targeted the same market, and even copied some of my originals. I guess, my “original” can only remain original once it is patented. THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS ORIGINAL IN THE FOOD BUSINESS. People can easily copy your recipe, add salt and sugar, and the recipe is theirs. No issues, whatsoever. It didn’t just happen to me and my shop. It is a vicious cycle in the industry that you should be aware of. Even bigger establishments deal with the same dilemma. Remember the Facebook or Instagram Ad you saw the last time saying they were the “first-ever- this-and-that-best-product”? Chances are… THEY ARE NOT.

A good example of this is the “Chocolate Dream Cake” in a metal canister trend two years ago. It became so popular that a lot of home-bakers decided to create their own version of it and sell it online. The same thing happened to “Custaroons“, because they became a craze, it was very easy to re-make them. Until, the original makers decided to patent their products. No one is allowed to use the names “Dream Cake” and “Custaroons” legally. Good choice, but not effective. People still make the same things, just in a different name, and a better version. Even if the product is virtually identical in the market, by just a mere change of one ingredient, people can claim it’s theirs. And unfortunately, potential customers tend to buy the cheaper version and not the original.

For this, I was done. I closed down my physical shop, but it doesn’t mean I was giving up. I still had one of my trusted bakers working from her own kitchen, delivering under my brand. The Royal Chimney was still there while I was away. It was waiting for an upgrade. I was not ready to close it down totally. I treated it as my baby, and my baby has to grow healthy.

I wanted to compete, and to be able to compete in this vast sea of like-minded entrepreneurs, I had to equip myself. Now, I am happy to write this article to be able to share to you what I learned from my mistakes. I hope I can help make things a little easier and less stressful for you by sharing my knowledge and experiences as you go through the birth-pains of starting a business. After two years in pastry and business school, I have now started my new business version 2.0 Sunday’s Cheesecakes.  I still keep The Royal Chimney as one of my flagship brands, as I already have a good number of returning customers there. I didn’t want to put that to waste. Re-introducing it as a smaller brand, focusing only to a few number of products was helpful for its growth.

While I start anew, imagine I am talking to you casually in a coffee shop (given this quarantine situation) and sharing my tips from everything I have learned from running my first ever stall business, failing to keep it afloat, trying again, online selling, managing my business pages, until now running a physical store.

What I want you to understand is that the Food Business is never glamorous. It is not for the faint-hearted. It will always be gruesome and toxic. You will find yourself in many sleepless nights. You might even become depressed of the pressure and ask yourself “Why did I even start doing this?”

Success is not an overnight process. It takes a lot of faith, hard work, patience, money, and consistent dedication. As a business owner, it is even worse than just working as an employee in the food industry. That’s if, you find yourself pushing through with your start-up business. I wrote an article about the difference of running a business and being an employee in the food industry, which can shed you some light. Read: When You Want To Enjoy The Holidays But You’re A Pastry Chef. Even if you have zero intention of committing to growing your food business, you might find some of these tips useful in your other endeavors.

However, with great passion and love for what you do… You will always find success in every little way possible. I can’t believe I just wrote a 9-paragraph Intro. I will not advise you to do the obvious things for your business like creating a proper and catchy business name for starters, taking good-looking photos of your products, or making yourself visible online. Pretty much, you have already done that. What I’m about to share to you is an entrepreneur’s view points and what you have to be aware of when starting a business. Let’s get you started with game-face on and the proper business mindset.

START WITH THE END IN MIND: BUSINESS PLANNING 101

A SOLID BUSINESS PLAN. “If you fail to plan, you plan to fail.” This is often overlooked by a new business owner, thinking that it’s very easy to sell online these days. “I’ll bake, I’ll cook, I’ll make these and that” and sell it online, not knowing what’s next. I was a victim of this mindset when I started my stall in the food bazaar. Here’s a background story.

I asked the bazaar organizer what was not in their bazaar. She said no one was selling crepes, so in an instant, I bought equipment to make crepes. I was the only one selling crepes that time, and I managed to pull it off for about two years with 3 stalls in different locations, operating in three different time slots. I was able to expand really fast from the sales I generated out of them. My bazaar stall operated from night time until wee hours of the following day. My two other stalls catered for corporate food courts, thus they follow office hours.

Sounds impressive, but guess what? It failed. Why? With no business plan and three stalls after, I didn’t know what to do next. I just got tired and sick of doing it, my staff were all dazed, and I had too many tasks on hand. I had to do marketing, I had to do my inventory, I had to organize my clients and contacts lists, and the duties just did not end there. It just kept on piling up as the business expanded. I had zero work-life balance. I was just exhausted. I didn’t know if I really wanted it and I got too overwhelmed with making it big. Do not make the same mistake as I did. Otherwise, you’ll end up sick, drained, broke, and completely confused.

WHAT DO YOU ENVISION? What is your niche? What are you planning to put on the menu? What are the possible products you might consider adding in the future? Business Plans can be very taxing to work on, but this is a very essential part of running a business. I learned it the hard way. What is in a business plan anyway that you have to spend time working on it? You can easily get access to business plan templates on Google, BUT in many instances it is not what you need. There are multiple types of business plans, but the important part is that it meets your requirements. A proper business plan entails THE FOUNDATION of your business down to your EXIT PLAN.

Sounds like a pessimistic piece of paper, right? We haven’t even started, why EXIT? This enables you to know what your next step would be, in case your business doesn’t run as smoothly as you expect. How do you deal with loss? Do you plan to sell your brand to a bigger and more established company? Do you plan to downsize it? In case the business triples its value, do you plan to expand to a bigger market or franchise your business? What are you investing on? Are you spending more than what you can handle? Who are your target market? What are the strengths and weaknesses of your business? What are the opportunities for you and possible outside threats?

Treat the business plan as if it is your skills assessment. What are your mission, vision, short-term and long-term goals? What can you offer to your market? How will you source out your finances? Where will you put your profits? What are your modes of payment? How do you establish your ordering system? Are you open for reselling? How do you handle resellers? In situations like a pandemic, how will you handle your cash-flow? What is your logistics plan? What is your marketing strategy? What are the papers, permits, licenses involved in starting your business? How much budget should you allot for paper works?

Your business plan should be able to answer all of these questions. If in time, while running the business and you experience a hiccup, go back to your business plan and check what needs to be adjusted. It’s not just a piece of paper. IT LITERALLY GUIDES YOU HOW YOU RUN YOUR BUSINESS.

RESEARCH: KNOW YOUR COMPETITORS AND YOUR MARKET

I am a very aggressive entrepreneur. My business partners know this well. If your pastry shop is visible online, most often than not, I have already scrutinized what you are selling. Sometimes, I even buy products from my competitors to know the quality of what I’m dealing with. If you have what I have on the menu, I will stalk you for a bit and research your market. Do we share the same market? If yes, then I have to come up with a better strategy to position my brand ahead of yours. Real Talk, No Bullsh*t.

When I was younger, I wanted to be able to offer what others cannot offer. Let’s use my crepe stalls as an example once again. When I asked the bazaar organizer what was not in the bazaar, I wanted to be the sole seller that offers what’s not there. I wanted to have what others did not have. Selling crepes, because others cannot simply make them. It requires skills and equipment. However, my success in the crepe-business did not last long. Even if I was the only one selling it, not a lot of people patronized it. I studied the foot-traffic of the bazaar. It caters to call-center agents working on the graveyard shift. The bazaar had shuttles in call-center offices to drive in traffic.

What was wrong with my business? Why do people not buy it? The answer was simple. I was competing with the wrong competitors and I was selling in the wrong market. The call-center agents were looking for something they could have for “dinner”. A rice meal, a complete package that is very convenient for them to have on a short period of their “break time”. Crepes are associated with dessert. They simply did not have time for dessert. My usual customers were trend-seekers, or families on a weekend shopping, and they were not constant bazaar goers. You will find them in high-end malls, ordering crepes while sipping on a cup of fancy tea. That was where I should be. I realized this when it was already too late. I have spent a lot already expanding my crepe business. It’s a very amateur mistake.

Nowadays, the competition begins with who gets the most likes on their online pages. Back in the days, who gets the longer queues wins the deal. Let me tell you this. If you are obsessed after Facebook Page likes and Instagram followers, then you are on the wrong business mindset. Getting exposure is very substantial, but the more important question is… Are they your market? Do they actually buy your products? Or are they just there for page likes?

REMEMBER: 4,000 “LIKERS” is never equal to 4,000 buyers. In this day and age, the number of followers and “likers” define your place in the industry and tells about your success. Though it can be a very efficient marketing tool, you may or may not be able to find your potential regular clients online.

Which leads me to the next important factor…

EFFECTIVE MARKETING AND BRANDING

I get it. Most of us did not major in Marketing. If you have no idea about Marketing at all, then it’s time to learn and educate yourself. Before the social media era, I had to resort to making x-deals with magazines, TV ads, and newspapers and handing out a lot of flyer print-outs. Those are the conventional methods you can still use, but here’s something I would like you to absorb.

WHAT IS THE MOST EFFECTIVE MARKETING TOOL?

Here’s a saying I go by every time I find myself in the middle of a marketing lag. FOCUS  ON THE QUALITY OF YOUR PRODUCTS, AND THE CUSTOMERS WILL LOOK FOR YOU. Not the other way around, you looking for customers. Let your products work for you and speak for itself. Quality versus Quantity. I would rather have five returning and regular clients, than ten clients who bought mediocrity with no chances of coming back. If you are after profitability through influencing customers, nothing is as powerful as word of mouth. It is a very compelling factor when making purchasing decisions, both in the internet world and outside of it. Remember, not everyone is on the Internet all the time.

Most people trust recommendations from their friends and their families when making a purchase. Thus, customer retention and recommendation is very important when building your brand. Make a good quality product and ask your customers for their experience. I would like you to take this “secret formula to success” by heart.

Excellent Products + Superb Customer Service = Regular Returning Clients (also known as ROI, Return on Investments)

Do not focus on your Page Likes. You can start a campaign like “Feedback Fridays” or “Leave a Reco” or a star system. Get people talking about your products. Customer interaction is key.

ONLINE PLATFORMS AND DIGITAL MARKETING

Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. I am pretty sure you found this article through one of my Social Media pages. Yey, me! My online pages work and they have reached you. Though I am telling you that the best marketing tool is word of mouth, entrepreneurs like us would have to adapt to the modern world. You might have the greatest products and ideas in the world, but if no one knows about it, your start-up business might end up struggling. INVEST ON MARKETING. But do not just focus on increasing your followers. Make your online visibility EFFECTIVE. I am sorry if you are not tech-savvy, I myself is not a tech guru, but do not fret. Most Social Media platforms are easy to navigate. If you have an Instagram Account or a Facebook Page, you might as well maximize it.

Browse around your pages and behold what it can do for you and your business. I would like to write these things in bullet form to make this easier for you.

Make a social media ad and target it to the right market (given you have already researched everything about your target market).

Set-up an instant reply tool to make it easier for you to get back to inquiries. This enables you to screen your potential buyers or simple inquirers. Most buyers make their transactions privately, thus sending you a private message and asking details about their orders. They will go after you if they are really interested with your products.

Set a budget for marketing ads.

Share your business ads to target groups.

Upload appealing photos, write a persuasive introduction, and boost them.

Create a business account on Instagram which allows you to post the same contents directly on your Facebook Pages. (You won’t have to post your contents twice. Connect your Instagram Account to your Facebook or Twitter Business Pages.)

Build a website and create a community out of it. This allows your return clients to create more buzz about your products and services that you offer.

Like what I have said. It is very easy to navigate around Social Media Platforms. But if you feel like these things are too demanding for you to do, you can always seek help from professionals. Nothing is wrong with working with the right people, who practically knows the ins and outs of Digital Marketing. Anvorte Corp. is a good example of Web Developers who can help you with this kind of Marketing Strategy. Their services often come with free consultations. I know, because this website is a productive result of what they can offer. 🙂

BRAND COLORS AND AESTHETICS

Your brand name and the materials you use to present yourself matters! Do not create a logo for the sake of just changing your boring business profile photo on Social Media. Believe me. The value of your business often starts with a very effective logo. The colors you use, your shapes, your features, your boxes, your stickers, your packaging, it all adds up to a complete customer experience. Every single detail of your branding has an impact on how your clients gauge your value. Your branding tells what sets you apart from your competition. On all occasions, customers notice these kind of details and it can MAKE or BREAK your sales.

Be consistent with your branding. If you choose certain colors for your brand, stick to it. If you want a rustic approach, show it on your ads. Show it on your packaging. If you market yourself as a dainty high-end brand, then walk the talk. Apply it on every little detail of your product.

ASSESS YOUR SKILL SET AND BUSINESS CAPABILITY

DO NOT BITE OFF MORE THAN YOU CAN CHEW. I cannot reiterate this enough. Attempting to do something more than you can handle is business suicide. Learn from my mistake. I have expanded my crepe business without any background and knowledge in managing a business. I thought I was in control, but it ended up as a failure.

Also, never promise anything to your customers without any idea and capability of accomplishing them. This will not only build strong doubt, but it can stain your credibility and integrity towards your clientele. “We will cross the bridge when we get there”, is a very bold quote (and a stupid one). We often say yes and dive to new opportunities without having a concrete plan. Always ask yourself, is it good for the long run? In reality, most new entrepreneurs decide to build a business with a certain goal… that is to make profits. But making profits is not attainable in a quick snap of a finger. Trying to do big things all at once to make profits will not only overwhelm you, but it will also make your business bleed into its slow death.

How do you know if your business is doing more than it can handle? Read this article 4 Signs That Your Business Has Bitten Off More Than It Can Chew.

My advice is, take it slowly and surely. Take baby steps and absorb each process through constant learning. Do not try to be jack-of-all-trades, understand that not everyone is your market. You are not everyone’s cup of tea. Focus on establishing a steady customer base before you expand your market and reach out to a bigger audience.

SURROUNDING YOURSELF WITH THE RIGHT PEOPLE

Today’s Social Media feeds will always be a reminder of what we can and cannot achieve. Do not let that limit you! While being friends with a lot of people, may or may not be able to drive traffic to your business, I would like to talk about your inner circle. Most often than not, the people we choose to hang out with and the people we choose to be a part of our circle has a great impact on our decision making, the way we perceive, and how we react to things.

The same goes with how we run our business. As we constantly strive to make it to success, some people tend to pull us down and distract us from attaining our full potential. “Crab-mentality” is quite pervasive when you decide to build a business. Do not let this stop you from achieving what you have envisioned. Seek for people who have the same goals as yours. According to Forbes, “Highly successful people are generally willing to share what it really takes to make things happen. They have the ability to help you learn from the mistakes they’ve made along the way and the “tricks and tips” to help you reach your goals faster. Seek out leaders of your field and get some real face time with them.” Look for a mentor, someone who has already clearly achieved their goals. Learn from their experiences and let them be your inspiration.

While being successful in business requires a lot of hard work (and sleepless nights), having the right people around greatly affects our mindset. Surround yourself with positive people, the goal-oriented, the visionaries, the hard workers, the learners. Seeing other people’s desire for success will keep you motivated to reach your goals. Surround yourself with people who will push you to become a better version of yourself. This will reflect on how you handle things while you run your start-up.

Also, do not be afraid to approach professionals. In building a business, you’re going to need some help to launch your start-up. You will need accountants, lawyers, financial advisors, web developers, designers, and of course your whole set of staff to complete your team. Even if you’re doing this business by yourself from your own home, I am pretty sure there is someone who is willing to support you all the way and lift you up when you feel discouraged. Your life path and mindset may change according to the connections you settle with. So choose your people wisely!

FINALLY…

Now that I have shared to you how I got myself started, it’s time to put it to test. These tips and factors may not be everything, but it can serve as a guide on how you will equip yourself. Do not be afraid to test the waters. I was once asked in a convention where I was a guest speaker for entrepreneurship, what would be my noteworthy advice for the new entrepreneurs who would like to venture and compete? My answer… You greatest competitor is yourself. Strive to be better a version from Day 0 until present. Furthermore, BE BRAVE. TAKE RISKS. NOTHING CAN EVER SUBSTITUTE EXPERIENCE.  

I would like you to expect the unexpected. Do not get discouraged if things do not run smoothly. You will face A LOT of setbacks. You will make mistakes and you will have to face tough decision-making. Sometimes, you will make wrong decisions, but that is OK. It’s part of it. You have to learn from your own mistakes for you to be able to handle what lies ahead. Just make sure your business goal is genuine. Make sure everything is legit, from registering your business name down to paying your taxes. As long as you’re doing it the right way, you will be just fine! Do not wait for the perfect timing, there’s no such thing. Sometimes, you just have to go for it! Life is too short to wonder what could have been. 🙂

BEST OF LUCK! I PRAY FOR YOUR SUCCESS! MAY WE ALL BE ABLE TO BOUNCE BACK TOGETHER!

  DO YOU PLAN TO RUN A START-UP?

DO YOU HAVE ANY TIPS FOR THE ENTREPRENEURS OF THE FUTURE?

DID YOU EXPERIENCE PROBLEMS WHILE RUNNING YOUR BUSINESS?

HOW DID YOU SOLVE THEM? WOULD YOU LIKE TO ASK OR SHARE ANYTHING?

I WOULD LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU!

  REAL TALK: Competitive Food Business and Getting Started was originally published on WanderBitesByBobbie

[news-mashable-yahoopartner-blog]

What are we willing to cancel people over, anyway?

Beautube continues to be the messy hellscape that it is, but the feud that went down between two major YouTubers just goes to show that nobody is above drama. Still, James Charles has a history of problematic behavior — why did it take until now for the community to cancel him? 

YouTube's beauty community was shaken on Friday when Tati Westbrook dropped a 43-minute video exposing her longtime friend and mentee James Charles. Among other reprehensible behavior, Tati also denounced his habit of allegedly sexually harassing straight men. 

The takedown followed weeks of rumors, screenshots, and snarky reaction videos from other vloggers, so it wasn't new, but it was the catalyst that has other influencers distancing themselves from the teenage makeup guru. 

If you're unfamiliar with the wild world of beauty YouTube, here's a rundown of all the people involved. 

James Charles is a 19-year-old beauty maven who went viral in 2016 for not only wearing makeup in his senior photos, but also being extra enough to bring a ring light to emphasize his highlighter. Later that year, he became the first male spokesperson for CoverGirl. Since then, he's amassed an immense social media following — at its peak, he had 15 million subscribers on YouTube. 

Charles' nearly overnight fame reached a climax usually reserved for traditional celebrities, not influencers, when he was invited to the Met Gala earlier in May. He raised eyebrows when he called the invitation "a step forward in the right direction for influencer representation in the media" in an Instagram post.

But after his rapid ascent to stardom, Charles is now crashing back down. He's been cancelled.

So I retook my senior photos & brought my ring light with me so my highlight would be poppin. I love being extra 💀 pic.twitter.com/7Qu1yu8U2P

— James Charles (@jamescharles) September 5, 2016

SEE ALSO: Men's makeup brands are discreet — and all over Instagram

Tati Westbrook is a 37-year-old makeup YouTuber who also owns Halo Beauty, a supplement company that sells gummy vitamins for strengthening hair and nails. Her direct competitor is Sugar Bear Hair, a similar company whose products have been endorsed by a variety of influencers, including the Kardashian-Jenner clan. 

Tati has been "like a mother" to James, according to James himself. She took the budding star under her wing when his career was just kicking off — and he even did her wedding makeup. 

Keeping up? Good, because this is where it gets messy. 

On April 22, James posted an endorsement for Sugar Bear Hair on his Instagram story after the company supposedly helped him with a security issue during Coachella. Without naming names, Tati said she felt "lost" and "betrayed" on her Instagram story. 

"When you do so much for people in your life and they not only don't return the favor, but they just don't even see you," Tati said in her tearful video. "I feel really used." 

James publicly apologized in similarly teary Instagram story the next day, and told his followers that he "did not think about the competition."

"She has been like a mother to me since my first days in this industry," he said in his public apology, adding that he didn't accept any money for the post and that he uses Tati's vitamin brand daily. "And has given me more love, support, resources, and advice than I could ever ask for."

Fellow makeup YouTuber Gabriel Zamora — who you might remember from the YouTube apology fiasco in summer 2018 known as Dramageddon — weighed in on the situation. In a video posted on May 4, he chided Tati for her immature reaction. 

"All these videos are being made where James is being made out to be this horrible human being and I'm just confused as to what happened," Gabriel said.

In response, Tati posted a video on Friday titled "BYE SISTER," a play on James' signature vlog intro, "Hi sisters!" The lengthy video dives into why Tati felt unappreciated by James, from his hesitation to promote her brand to his reluctance to collaborate with her. She publicly severed ties with him, concluding that it was "painful to lose someone you care about, that you thought would be in your life forever, but the chapter's closed."

Since dropping the video, Tati has been rapidly gaining followers as James loses them. Twitter users and other influencers paid attention.

drama aside, i have something to say.... ❤️https://t.co/Hn20TgNSzM❤️ pic.twitter.com/vRPFCTJIEJ

— Shane Dawson (@shanedawson) May 12, 2019

Image: Twitter Screenshot/Jefree Star

As of Monday morning, James has lost more than 2.5 million subscribers in three days, according to SocialBlade. Tati, meanwhile, gained more than 2.9 million since posting the video. To put that into perspective, as vlogger Callum Markie noted, Logan Paul gained 80,000 subscribers after filming a victim of suicide in Japan. 

But the backlash isn't just over snubbing a friend — it's over a much more concerning issue. Although the majority of the video was about her personal relationship with James, it also shed light on his toxic habit of allegedly sexually harassing straight men. 

"Oh my god, you tried to trick a straight man into thinking he's gay yet again," Tati ranted in her video, recalling a phone conversation she recently had with James. "And somehow, you're the victim." 

She continued:

Tati was alluding to just one of many instances where James toyed with straight men. The receipts channel Spill laid out several examples, including his questionable relationship with model Gage Gomez. In April, Gomez posted a video calling James out for continuing to pursue him despite repeatedly turning him down. 

"[He] pushed his emotions onto me to guilt me into trying something that I didn't want to do," the model said. 

James has also publicly hit on Shawn Mendes, leaving suggestive comments on the singer's Instagram live videos and tweets. 

He later apologized in a tweet, and said he was "sorry if he [Shawn] felt sexually harassed."

After Tati's video, others came forward. Someone who claimed to be a former classmate tweeted that James allegedly sexually assaulted her friend. Singer Zara Larsson also tweeted that James repeatedly hit on her boyfriend, despite knowing that he's straight. And in a supercut of James' vlogs, a Twitter user showed the numerous times the beauty guru admitted he enjoyed pursuing heterosexual men because "it's easier than you think."

It's about time James Charles stopped getting a pass for his repeatedly toxic behavior. But why did it take a video from Tati for the internet to finally cancel him? Twitter user @Quantum_King_ questioned why Tati protected James for years, despite public knowledge that he harassed men both in person and on social media. 

Did Tati Westbrook expose a predator or did she harbour a predator until she felt under appreciated by him?

— Brokeryn Martell 🇱🇨🇯🇲 (@Quantum_King_) May 11, 2019

If James Charles would’ve promoted tati’s vitamins, do y’all think she still would’ve made that video exposing him for being trash? Let’s discuss

— femme fatale (@eliesaaab) May 12, 2019

And others pointed out how hypocritical it was for Jeffree Star, another member of the YouTube beauty community, to speak out against James despite his own problematic past. (Star has since deleted his tweet, but there is a screenshot included above.)

seeing my mutuals dragging james charles while simultaneously supporting jeffree star and it’s interesting pic.twitter.com/TJHlxo2tkv

— 𝖙 𝖉𝖆𝖜𝖌 (@tamiamakay) May 12, 2019

Is James Charles being canceled because of his actions, or because the internet loves drama? It's been nearly a year since Dramageddon tore Beautube apart, exposing multiple YouTubers for their racist tweets. 

Somehow, James' own racist remarks weren't pulled into the whirlwind of cancellation. When he made a transphobic comment earlier in 2019 about how he wasn't "full gay" because he had been attracted to trans men, he received some backlash but got away relatively unscathed. Why is it Tati's video that's tanking his career? 

Maybe it's because the internet is willing to give a pass to its faves, until it's time to grab some popcorn and watch a feud go down. It's good that the internet is finally done with James — the face of the beauty community absolutely should not be a predator. But nobody paid attention or sought to hold him accountable until there was a friendship break up involved. 

The influencers at the center of Dramageddon have more or less recovered from 2018's Beautube culling. Gabriel Zamora continues to make videos. Nikita Dragun was just profiled in Forbes. Manny MUA is still releasing products from his makeup line, Lunar Beauty. Even Laura Lee, whose iconically terrible apology video fueled Twitter memes for weeks, seems fine according to Instagram. 

Will James Charles' cancellation last, or will the internet accept him into the fold again like it did with Jeffree Star? Despite his many controversies, Star is a multimillionaire thriving on top of a massive beauty empire.  

"A lot of most of my career over the last two years has been about me making mistakes and trying to learn and grow from them," James stated in his apology video posted Friday. "And I haven't always done the best job of that. I can admit that, but I have always tried ... I wish I could say this is the last time that I make a mistake, but it won't be." 

And as his beauty vlogger predecessors have proven, he's at least right about that. Will he stay canceled? Hopefully. Will more makeup-centered drama go down in the near future and take down more racist, transphobic predators? God, we hope so. 

WATCH: 'Avengers: Endgame' is the most tweeted-about movie ever

#_author:Morgan Sung #_category:yct:001000002 #_lmsid:a0Vd000000DTrEpEAL #_uuid:6bc0f913-4c65-31cf-a25e-1faa0342fe5d #_revsp:news.mashable

[missguidedmartyr]

National Eating Disorder Awareness Week. I’ve refrained from posting my story for years now partly because I don’t want it to define me, and because, frankly, it’s the hardest subject to admit to. Before anything else, I openly thank every single person at Rhodes Farm for being so strong and determined and kind and inspirational - seeing some of you now happy and beautiful and thriving is so so incredible.

This is not a ‘look at how bad I got” post, something that will elicit competitiveness amongst people who are struggling right now (please don’t do this to the extent where it could harm others). This is giving whatever evidence I can that the reality is not a floaty manic pixie dream girl tragically staring in the mirror, but a body eating itself to stay alive. Anorexia is not silent or numbing; it is when your mind is at its loudest, most chaotic, most frustrated, which deafens you to what you’re doing to yourself. You don’t recognise you are becoming fragile for it tells you you are doing something right, for once.

Over the summer of 2013, I developed an eating disorder. I was admitted to hospital sometime late November 2013 for my heart had given up after seeing the school nurse for feeling shaky due to what I thought was simply the cold weather, but that’s purely the problem; it had to take my life teetering on the edge like that for anyone to recognise that I needed help. I refused that anything was wrong with me, because in the midst of an illness someone finding out means you are swamped in shame and fear that they may take the control from your hands.

This is wrong. To anyone out there right now avoiding this tag because they think they have nothing to worry about, see your GP. Don’t leave it a second longer because this illness, left untreated, has only one outcome. 1/5 die prematurely from anorexia. 1/10 are male. Only 10% are diagnosed with the illness, and of that only 5% are admitted to psychiatric units.

I was discharged from a unit in London in February the following year, and to this day I am so proud that despite the effects it has left on me that I live a normal life. Yes there have been momentary lapses, but with anorexia, it’s learning to walk alongside those thoughts everyday and knowing you’re better than them, that you can stamp on them whenever you like.

I strongly believe the system of psychiatric units was not right for me, and I campaign for therapists and GPs to listen and understand that it is not always ‘our illness talking’. Torture to me was what was experienced there: we were not allowed out into the ‘real world’, only hemmed in within the boundaries, we had to pass tests, we had to be watched in the toilet/in the shower (mostly by men), we had a half hour phone call home to our family once a week that always ended in shouting and tears before the supervisor cut you off, if we were caught standing up (we had to remain sitting all day) we had a penalty of eating a high calorie food), we were not allowed to see friends as to ‘hinder our recovery’, we were not allowed to our rooms before 10pm, we were not allowed to sit alone, we were not allowed to eat outside of the time limits, we had to complete the silly little tasks they set us in order to see if we could conform. This was a negative space. 

But what I dread for others being admitted is the exposure to trauma. My experience left me traumatised, but now I have the utmost admiration for the support everyone there gave to me. We built each other up, we stood ‘arm in arm’, I guess, but then when 24 different illnesses are combined in one house (a sufferer of schizophrenia in a bedroom with a sufferer compulsive binge/purge) it can overwhelm you, and desensitise you to the outside world and the healthy people in it. The only people around you are severely unwell, and yet you are expected to use each other as role models?

All eating disorders are equally mental and biological. Be sensitive. Don’t think you can recognise someone who is affected. Don’t let toxic language or humour creep into your speech. Never be ashamed to admit you need help, just as you wouldn’t for a physical disease.

If you’re looking at these photos and a part of you is thinking you can see a person full of the ferocity of ye olde life, you’re right. These photos are my recovery. I was discharged three years ago, and yet this is where my recovery lies - in my fire, my energy, my quietude, my moments where it all rests suspended, my ambition, the power of movement and the beauty of being present. The beauty of looking at the person I love and not feeling any fear that I will have to be taken away. Kissing, hugging so tight you can’t breathe, laughing, snorting, falling over - beautiful. Of lying beside my best friends semi-pissed eating cheetos while the cops roam downstairs. Of mice and men

Anyway not gonna make a dick joke this was my message. I’m not apologising for my intensity. not light material. ayyy

#mental illness #national eating disorders awareness week #eating disorders #ed #anorexia #mental illness awareness week #depression #what light tags

[ncmagroup]

by Steli Efti

Your sales team is crushing it. They’re closing deals left and right. Revenue is way up, and your growth looks off the charts. At this rate, that huge valuation you’ve been dreaming of seems well within reach.

Three months later, it’s all fallen apart. Half of those new clients have canceled their subscriptions, they’re badmouthing your product, and your churn rate is through the roof. You’re no longer meeting your revenue goals, let alone exceeding them. And that valuation you were hoping for? Not going to happen.

It’s a classic sales mistake. In their haste to close all those deals, your salespeople didn’t stop to think whether they were the right deals. It’s only natural. They’re hustlers—the idea of turning away a willing customer and leaving a commission on the table offends them.

But, selling to the wrong customers is toxic for your business. It’s your job to get your salespeople thinking about the company’s health beyond the immediate deal.

What happens when you sell to the wrong customers?

Selling to the wrong customers will kill your SaaS business in several ways, not all of which are obvious:

Customers who don’t get value from your product will have extra training needs, frequent support requests, and endless complaints. In addition to costing time and money, constantly hearing bad things about the product will crush your team’s morale.

Those customers will leave sooner rather than later, which will lead to high churn. Churn will make it nearly impossible to hit revenue goals since you’ll constantly need to replace old customers. Plus, churn rate is one of the first things investors will ask about—if it’s too high, your company’s valuation prospects are doomed.

It’ll destroy your company’s brand. Customers who leave will tell their friends and colleagues about their bad experience with your product. And believe me, nothing will be more frustrating than hearing people who should have never been using your product in the first place go around telling everyone how much it sucks.

Kayako, a startup which provides help desk and customer service software, knows firsthand the pain of a wrong fit:

“We had a big contract in hand, sure. But we were spending way less time building value that would help our many other customers advance. […] We ignored all the warning signs that BigCo was trying to fit a square peg in a round hole, and we were helping them mash it in.”

Kayako eventually cut the cord early and parted on good terms with BigCo but not without significant cost to team morale and productivity.

This is what really differentiates SaaS sales from sales in any other industry. Other businesses can thrive selling a product to someone just once—it’s a transactional sales process. But with SaaS, your customers have to continuously justify paying you each month and can cancel their subscription at any time—in some ways, you’re reselling the product again and again.

You need to build relationships with customers who will grow as you grow, and you can only do that if you’re reaching the right people.

3 ways to get your sales team selling smart

As a leader, you need your salespeople to understand that their job is about more than just maxing out sales quotas. It’s about giving real solutions to real problems, providing expertise, and finding the right customer fit. They need to look at how the sales they make affect the overall health of the company and learn to pass up customers who aren’t a good fit. That’s the kind of team that will get out there and sign up a roster of committed clients you can build your company on.

1. Educate your team

Education is an important part of building a successful sales team. Your whole team needs to understand the metrics upon which your company is built—not just their individual numbers.

This requires a change in the way your reps think:

“For sales reps – especially veteran ones who largely operate on autopilot – this ownership of the churn rate SaaS metric requires a mindset shift. They need to migrate their thinking from one of ‘Let’s sell software to every potential customer we can,” to one of “Let’s sell software to customers who truly need our product and will derive real value from actively using it.'”—InsightSquared

Drill in the importance of lifetime value (LTV) and churn, and how the decisions your sales team makes affect them. Make them understand why SaaS companies that only focus on short-term sales fail.

Beyond that, make sure that finding the right customers remains a priority in practice as well. Here are some ways to keep the whole team focused on the big picture:

Keep score of how many of each salesperson’s customers unsubscribe. To play off salespeople’s natural competitiveness, lots of companies keep a scoreboard of everyone’s sales. By reapplying that concept and keeping score of how many clients they lose, you communicate that it is an equally important number.

Track each individual’s churn rate for the customers they sign up. By viewing it alongside the company’s overall churn rate, salespeople can see their impact on the larger health of the company.

Have each salesperson talk about their most recent customer who unsubscribed during sales meetings. The team can discuss why they think the relationship didn’t work out, which will help them learn what signs to look for in the future about whether a customer is a good fit for the product.

Your sales team has to understand that success at your company is measured by more than the sales they make.

2. Demonstrate how it’s done

It’s not enough to just teach your salespeople to sell to the right customers. You also need to lead by example. The team needs to see you turn away bad business: “I’ll be 100% honest with you. We’ve been talking for a while, and I hate to say it, but our product just isn’t right for you. Let me help you figure out a better direction to go.”

Think about it—a company’s values mean nothing if the people in charge don’t act on them. At that point, they’re just something nice to talk about. If you’re going to tell your salespeople that setting customers up for success matters more than getting a quick sale, then you need to show them that the rule applies from top to bottom. You’re not asking your team to do anything you wouldn’t do yourself—and when they see this, they’ll go the extra mile.

Take responsibility and show your salespeople that finding the right customers is an expectation for everyone, regardless of job title or tenure.

“Lead by example, not by title.”—Ross Kimbarovsky, the founder, and CEO of Startup Foundry

3. Incentivize long-term thinking

If your salespeople are only rewarded for the volume of new business they bring in, then guess what? They’ll sign anyone under the sun.

“I often hear business owners complain that their sales team is not selling the products and services they would prefer. For example, the sales team appears to be spending their time on less profitable products and on accounts that aren’t in the company’s best interest. Business owners are sure the problem resides with the sales team and their lack of focus on what is truly important. Often, after reading the sales compensation plan, I realize the problem is in how the sales plan was written [emphasis added].” — John Lee, VP of Sales at Sales Xceleration

Building a commission structure that reflects your company’s values is important because people’s actions are driven by their incentives. Yes, you should give sales commissions. But, compensation has to align with the company’s primary objective: providing customers a great long-term value.

Consider:

Give bonuses to salespeople whose clients have the highest renewal rates.

Take away commissions from salespeople whose customers churn within five months.

Think about it from the salesperson’s perspective—if she’s only rewarded for the sheer amount of upfront revenue she brings in, then why bother asking if the customers she closes are the right ones? She’ll ask herself, “Well, if the company really cared about this, wouldn’t they pay me for it? Wouldn’t they reward that behavior?” And she’d be right!

Money talks louder than anything else. It doesn’t make any sense to tell your sales team to do one thing but then pay them for another. Adjust your compensation plan to match the behavior you want to see and, as the startup mentor and angel investor Gordon Daugherty advises, “identify loosely defined rules or ‘gray areas’ that can be exploited.”

Hungry for the right customers

Hungry salespeople will enable your team to grow. But left to their own devices, they’ll sell to customers who will actually hurt your business. They need proper management to fully tap into their potential and spread your product to the people who need it.

After all, why did you start a SaaS company in the first place? You saw a problem and knew you had a great product to solve it—you didn’t get in this game to sell people stuff they don’t need. So don’t do it! Cultivate this problem-solving, customer-centric mentality in your sales team, and you’ll achieve the best kind of success possible in SaaS—sustainable success.

    Go to our website:   www.ncmalliance.com

Are your salespeople closing bad deals? Here’s how to fix it! by Steli Efti Your sales team is crushing it. They’re closing deals left and right. Revenue is way up, and your growth looks off the charts.

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We Have Strife!

ARE YOU READY FOR SOME FOOTBALL?

The Eagles are limping into Week 1– not on the injury report, where they, perhaps for the first time in history, claimed no injuries on Friday, but with a head coach who has now been the subject of multiple damning “hot takes” or, if you and Mr. Lurie prefer, “clickbait.”

This week, Doug Pederson was eviscerated by longtime NFL front office man Mike Lombardi.

Today, Inquirer Eagles beat writer Jeff McLane threw a grenade into the Novacare Complex with this piece questioning whether Lombardi’s comments were due to his friendship with Jim Schwartz, whom he hired some 25 years ago, and the fact that the Eagles’ defensive coordinator is gunning for Pederson’s job. Wait, what? McLane:

Having Schwartz, a former head coach with a large personality, in the building always threatened to overshadow Pederson. Lombardi doubled down on his remarks during interviews with the Inquirer and PST. He said that Pederson wasn’t detail oriented enough. He pointed out that Wentz and the Eagles offense had regressed last season.

And he questioned the second-year coach’s ability to stand in front of his team and inspire confidence – a bold presumption unless he gathered it from someone in the room. The only Eagles entity that escaped Lombardi’s wrath was Schwartz.

…

On Tuesday, when a reporter asked Schwartz to comment on Lombardi in part because of their history, the coordinator said that he worked with many people around the NFL over the last quarter century. He downplayed their relationship and said that he hadn’t seen Lombardi’s remarks on Pederson, that he only knew the general premise.

Lombardi said that he doesn’t talk to Schwartz “very much.”

At the very least, the optics aren’t favorable. One Eagles staffer said the only coach who probably doesn’t think Schwartz is trying to undercut Pederson is Pederson. Three players, who requested anonymity, said that it’s become well-known in the locker room that Schwartz is waiting to usurp power.

This is how the Eagles are going into Week 1 of Doug Pederson’s second season as head coach. Either the Philly media is excellent at shit-stirring (quite possible) or Lurie is a master of fostering a toxic environment ‘neath him. Indeed he seems to thrive in it, like that ex-girlfriend you had who wouldn’t have sex with you unless it was following a 12:02 a.m. text message from a 267 number that touched off a massive drunken blowup about “THIS BITCH!” which somehow resulted in you becoming more desirable and “the only one for me.” In either case, things are always lively, if a bit unsustainable in the long run. Lurie went running back to the safe guy in Pederson, but just can’t seem to resist the urge to spice things up by being “just friends” with Schwartz.

Here’s what I know: McLane is a good reporter, and I suspect he doesn’t write this unless there’s something to it. As written, it’s thin on sourcing (even though it does have perfunctory comments from all those involved) and contains an awful lot of speculation. But for someone who was ejected from the press box(!) during the last Eagles regular season game to write this heading into Week 1, especially for the local paper of record (which is trying to re-invent itself through an online paywall*), McLane would have to be pretty certain about the tone he was striking. This is how you write stories where most of your information is on background or otherwise off the record– you couch it in speculation and take the heat that comes with it. I’ve written this kinda of story, mostly with RADIO WARS. Sometimes you know something, or are at least aware of inner conjecture, and have to speculate about it, which is what McLane seems to be doing here.

*The Philly.com staff has crushed it this week with compelling piece after compelling piece in an effort to stave off new competition in the market and justify their own paywall. There is undoubtedly some level of pressure felt by everyone there, and one could argue that it creates the sort of incentive structure to reach for stories like this one. To be clear, I am not accusing McLane of doing that here. 

Either way, this is a good read, which contains comments from players apparently upset by the fact that Schwartz doesn’t say hello to them in the hallways. Some things never change.

We Have Strife! published first on http://ift.tt/2pLTmlv