#i need someone to make a jane seymour edit

[what-is-originality]

Why I think Jane Seymour ghostwrote Barbie Tingz by Nicki Minaj:

Exhibit A:

“I’m still fly, just bagged a white guy”

Henry VIII is white.

Exhibit B:

“Pussy so good his ex still wanna fight me”

This could be shade towards Anne Boleyn’s ghost and Catherine of Aragon. Jane was a lady-in-waiting to both and was Anne’s second cousin, I’d wanna fight too 👀

Exhibit C:

"I cut all my niggas off but they would still wife me"

She - quite dramatically, might I add - rejected Henry VIII’s gift and letter of admiration, but still got engaged to him the day after Anne B was executed.

She was also formerly engaged to William Dormer, he’s the wigga (lmao) that would still wife her, duh.

Exhibit D:

"He still the only nigga that I woulda signed to, if I ain't sign to Wayne's perfectly designed crew"

Here, Nicki J’Onika is stating that she would have signed to Jay Z’s label if it wasn’t for Lil Wayne’s, hence Jay = William and Wayne = Henry, as per Exhibit C.

Exhibit E:

"Cause we the big three, don't need a big speech. We made the biggest impact, check the spreadsheet"

The first 3 wives made the biggest impact. Catherine was Henry’s first Queen, Anne’s seduction of Henry literally led to the English break from the Catholic Church so that he could get a divorce & Jane had a son. All of their children later ruled as the Queen/King at one point.

Exhibit F:

"Sagittarius so you know I’m an optimist"

Her exact birthday is unknown, so she could be a Sag 🤷🏾‍♀️

Exhibit G:

"If that bitch get slick, I'll cut the bitch"

Anne B's head, nuff said.

Exhibit H:

“How you still dissin’, still can’t find some hits?”

This is in reference to gossip pamphlets that were being spread about Jane and Henry’s relationship whilst Anne B was locked up, J’Onika made this one so obvious ngl.

Exhibit I:

"Let's be real, all you bitches wanna look like me, wanna be in demand, get booked like me, wanna run up in the lab and cook like me - but ain't nan you hoes pussy good like me"

Jane was Henry's favourite wife + the only wife named Jane. He married 3 Catherines [including Katherine lol] & 2 Annes.

Bonus: Nicki Minaj is always rapping about how these bitches are her sons, and she had a son... you know who else had a son??? 😏

Jarbz rise!

#have a nice day! :) #shitpost #anne boleyn #jane seymour #henry viii #catherine of aragon #history #tudor history #barbz #nicki minaj #i made a tiktok about this lol #i need someone to make a jane seymour edit

[period-dramallama]

My thoughts on the trailer

The line about England being at war with itself... the only sort of acknowledgement of the Reformation. I hope the Reformation gets properly mentioned.

That line about others seeking to divide them....OK, but Mary and Edward fell out over starkly different religious beliefs. They didn't really need all that much encouraging.

Love the shots of the hanging, complete with screaming. Very good cinematography. The visuals so far... me gusta.

"Put your eyes back in your head" is that Kat Ashley? I think that's Kat Ashley. There's no evidence of Kat berating Elizabeth. She complained about Seymour's behaviour and commented on Elizabeth's dress being a mess, but when it came to marriage, she was in favour.

That line about Catherine having a pawn... I think the pawn is Jane.

The trailer wants us to think it's Elizabeth, by the editing, but I think Jane makes more sense.

A) Jane is also Catherine's ward

B) if Jane marries Edward, she becomes queen consort

C) Catherine controlling Elizabeth wouldn't be significant, because Elizabeth doesn't have any power. Yes, she's an heir, but behind Mary.

D) if Jane marries and controls Edward, and Catherine controls Jane, Catherine controls Edward. Therefore, Somerset has his pawn (Edward, king) and Catherine has hers (Jane, potential queen consort). Those two can grapple for power more easily than king and second princess.

No one has yet mentioned it, but isn't Alicia's voice beautiful? Almost hypnotic. I am very excited for her performance as young Elizabeth.

So Elizabeth seems to lean towards Seymour and he leans away??? That better be him toying with her/playing mind games. Because irl, it was Seymour moving forwards and Elizabeth moving away.

In defence of Elizabeth's crossbow: she was a keen hunter, and her mentor Ascham wrote a treatise in praise of archery. And if she does point/shoot at someone, well, the real Elizabeth did say that if she were in Mary Stuart's position, she'd have stabbed Darnley. I do hope she doesn't get stuck in any kind of battle situation though.

I really hope Pedro isn't just an expy of Oviedo from Spanish Princess. Don't get me wrong, I liked Oviedo, but I'd rather have variety in my nonwhite characters' personalities and storyline please and thank you.

Elizabeth calling out Edward in public? Oh boy would she not do that.

OK, the dress cutting. C'mon writers, it's not a complex scene to get right. It's now happening indoors instead of the garden, and where is Catherine? And Elizabeth doesn't look confused, or alarmed, she looks defiant, like she knows the dress cutting is sexual/sexualised. And she's just standing there defiantly.

By making her look defiant instead of afraid, the writers I think give her too much agency, which tones down what happened.

The fire breathing performer! The fireworks! The dancing! I'm really looking forward to some proper courtly revels.

#becoming elizabeth #period drama

[thoughtfulfangirling]

2022 Reads

It’s that time where I start a new list of the books I’m reading this year. I might try again to do blurbs about them as I go and link them but uh... I’ve never kept up with it so no promises. For my 2021 and previous year reads, go here and follow the rabbit hole. For 2023, go here.

Maid: Hard Work, Low Pay, and a Mother’s Will to Survive^ by Stephanie Land

How to Lose the Time War* by Max Gladstone and Amal El-Mohtar~

Sorcery of Thorns^ by Margaret Rogerson

The Animals in That Country^ by Larua Jean McKay

Gearbreakers by Zoe Hana MIkuta

An Indigenous Peoples’ History of the United States: ReVisioning American History by Roxanne Dunbar-Ortiz

Princess Floralinda and the Forty-Flight Tower (novella) by Tamsyn Muir

A Winter Haunting^ by Dan Simmons

The Binding: A Novel by Bridget Collins

Falling Leaves: The True Story of an Unwanted Chinese Daughter by Adeline Yen Mah

The Dark Lord of Derkholm^ By Diana Wynn Jones

Sooner or Later Everything Falls into the Sea* by Sarah Pinsker~

Midnight Never Come by Marie Brennan

The Song in the Silence* by Elizabeth Kerner

How to Do the Work: Recognize Your Patterns, Heal from Your Past, and Create Your Self by Nicole LePera, PhD

Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell^ by Susanna Clark

Ordinary Men: Reserve Police Battalion 101 and the Final Solution in Poland by Christopher R. Browning

Dark Currents: Agent of Hel book 1 by Jacqueline Carey

The Collected Schizophrenias: Essays by Esme´ Weijun Wang

Pride and Prejudice* by Jane Austen

The Lesser Kindred* by Elizabeth Kerner

Lincoln in the Bardo^ by George Saunders

Emma by Jane Austen

Accessing the Future edited by Kathryn Allan and Djibril Al-Ayad

Redeeming the Lost* by Elizabeth Kerner

1984 by George Orwell~

Kushiel's Chosen* by Jacqueline Carey

One Last Stop by Casey McQuiston

The Secret History by Donna Tart

How we Fight for Our Lives by Saeed Jones

She Who Became the Sun by Shelley Parker-Chan

Honey Girl by Morgan Rogers

GenderQueer: Voices From Beyond the Sexual Binary edited by Joan Nestle, Clare Howell, and Riki Wilchins

The Deep by Rivers Solomon (novella)

Parable of the Sower by Octavia E Butler

For the Love of Men: From Toxic to a More Mindful Masculinity by Liz Plank

Contact by Carl Sagan~

Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea by Jules Verne

The Witch's Heart by Genevieve Gornichec

We're Going to Need More Wine by Gabrielle Union

Tribe: On Homecoming and Belonging by Sebastian Junger

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen*

Parable of the Talents by Ocatavia E Butler

Terror, Love and Brainwashing: Attachment in Cults and Totalitarian Systems by Alexandra Stein

The Last Gunfight: The Real Story of the Shootout at the O.K. Corral-And How It Changed the American West by Jeff Guinn

Circe by Madeline Miller

Autumn Bones: Agent of Hel Book 2 by Jacqueline Carey

Ice Planet Barbarians by Ruby Dixon

The Exorcist by William Peter Blatty

Dead Girls: Essays on Surviving an American Obsession by Alice Bolin

True Irish Ghost Stories compiled by St John D Seymour and Harry L Neligan

Legends & Lattes by Travis Baldree

Nona the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir~

Beloved by Toni Morrison

The Penguin Book of Hell edited by Scott G Bruce

The Devil and Harper Lee by Mark Seal

Plain Bad Heroines by Emily Danforth

Mostly Void, Partially Stars by Joseph Fink and Jeffrey Cranor

Carmilla by J. Sheridan Lefanu

Pride, Prejudice, and Other Flavors* by Sonali Dev

Ninth House by Leigh Bardugo

Thirteen Storeys by Jonathan Sims^

Hallowe'en Party by Agatha Christie

Dracula by Bram Stoker*~

The Girl in the Green Silk Gown by Seanan McGurie

Cemetery Boys by Aiden Thomas

Under the Pendulum Sun by Jeannette Ng

Northanger Abbey by Jane Austen

Red Azalea by Anchee Min

The November Girl by Lydia Kang

The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle^ by Haruki Murakami with Jay Rubin

Poison Fruit: Agent of Hel Book 3 by Jacqueline Carey

Kiss Her Once for Me by Alison Cochrun

In the Midst of Winter by Isabel Allende

Make You Mine This Christmas by Lizzie Huxley-Jones

*Re-Reads ^Chosen for me by someone else ~Reads done with spouse

#yearly reading masterpost #tfgoc #tfg reads #2022 Books #my reading index

[shalebridge-cradle]

When You Smile and it Tears Your Face (It’s Time for the Inhuman Race)

Warnings: Blood. Implied Violence.

“Anna?”

Anna von Kleve, former minor noble of the Holy Roman Empire, pries open her eyes. It’s well into the night – the heavy curtains are drawn, as usual, the grandfather clock is ticking away, and the electric light flickers ominously above her.

She herself is sprawled on the sofa, with her date’s head in her lap. Ah, yes. A night on the town, a few drinks (well, more than a few on her part)… she hopes he’d had a good time.

“In the drawing room,” she calls, lazily.

“Have you seen my book?”

Anna has seen lots of her housemate’s beloved books. So very many volumes she’s collected over the years – in her day, the emperor himself would be hard-pressed to afford such a selection. Still, she’s proud it was a German who invented the printing press and started the whole thing off.

“Which one?”

“Pride and Prejudice, volume three. It’s got a red-brown cover.”

von Kleve frowns, looks around herself, lifts up her date to check under him.

She grimaces.

If the book didn’t have a red cover to begin with, it certainly did now. She never intends for the whole biting-people-and-drinking-their-blood business to be messy, but it always ends up that way. Strange how that happens.

She quickly drops the man’s unconscious body back on top of the book, just as her housemate materialises in the doorway.

Catherine Parr sighs. “Seriously? What have I told you about putting down plastic when you bring your food home?”

“I know, but we get kind of… into it, you know? You know me, I live in the moment – well, not live, but… you get what I’m saying.”

“That’s the problem, hence, the need for plastic.”

A pause.

Anna knows what she’s about to say, and preempts her. “No, not your type. Not terrible, but he couldn’t talk about anything that wasn’t his football team.”

“Oh. A pity.” Another pause. “Have you seen my book, though?”

“No books here. Did you leave it at Seymour’s?”

Parr hums. “Possibly. I’ll visit later. It’s your job to get rid of the poor soul, though.”

“Yes, yes, personal responsibility and all that.”

Before Anna leaves, she tucks the first edition under the sofa cushions, and hopes her housemate doesn’t look that hard for her precious book.

~~~

The shovel plunges deep into the black, wet soil, and out again. In, out, in, out, methodical and practiced. The hole needs to be deep enough, and wide enough. She’s underestimated the size before, and that simply causes problems. There are bits that need to stay underground.

Once she is satisfied, and with great care, Jane Seymour places the rose bush into its new home.

Gardening might be considered an odd hobby for someone like her to have. Even if she rarely gets to see the fruits of her labour (which is most certainly a metaphor for something), it keeps her busy and helps her feel productive. It’s terribly easy to fall into a rut if you don’t have something to do, and caring for plants gives her plenty of that.

Just so long as they survive everything.

There is a loud bang from inside the house. Jane turns briefly, listening for something further, before she goes back to patting down the soil.

Another bang, followed by a crash.

Jane squeezes her eyes shut, and growls under her breath. That had better not be anything important.

Really, she should go in and stop them from doing any more damage, but they’d probably just ignore her like they usually do. Maybe you shouldn’t have your thrice-bedamned battle in the house, where there are things that you both like and are easily breakable all over the place. Is that such an unreasonable concept?

A third bang.

“For heaven’s sake,” she grumbles, and makes to get up, turning to her gardening tools. Initially, she shies away from some of them out of instinct, but… then again… this may the only way they’ll listen…

-

The fearsome duel is still going on when Jane reaches the hall.

One combatant has a name she knows well, mostly because she insists on using the whole thing whenever she is introduced. Catalina Trastámara de Aragón, former Spanish infanta. The other has gone by many different but similar names – Anna de Boullan, Anna Bolina, Nan Bullen, but she generally responds to ‘Anne’, so that’s what they go with.

Catalina has her hand around Anne’s neck, hoisting her up in the air, whilst Anne has a hold on Catalina’s arm, hissing up a storm. Another bang – Catalina slamming Anne against the wall – sends a cloud of dust trickling down on top of them.

Jane enters, in her gardening smock, boots too big for her, a straw hat (you must always wear a hat while gardening, though Jane isn’t sure why), and with a wooden gardening stake in each hand.

“Down! Both of you!”

Anne turns her head slightly, and her eyes widen when she sees what Jane’s holding. “Shit.”

This gets Catalina’s attention, too, but she manages to keep the quiet part quiet. She releases her grip, and Anne sinks to the floor.

“What are you doing?” Catalina recovers her regal demeanour, or at least part of it. “Have you gone quite mad?”

“Have you? Look at what you’re doing! What on earth is noble and queenly about repeatedly smacking your housemate into a wall?!” Jane stops to compose herself. “What is it this time? Territorial dispute? Long-standing grudge you refuse to talk about? Monopoly?”

“Anne? How many glasses would you say are in the sink?”

...No.

Anne rubs her neck. “Well, maybe less if you weren’t such a toff and drank like the rest of us.”

That can’t be right. Was that it?

“Unlike you, I like to keep some of my dignity about me.”

“Oh, don’t you fucking talk to me about dignity -”

Jane is between them in a blink. “Anne, do the bloody dishes.” Anne groans, probably at the unintended pun, but is interrupted. “We have the chore wheel for a reason. We have standards.”

“You’re no fun.”

“I know. Dishes now, fight later.”

Anne huffs, and stomps into the kitchen. Jane’s attention turns to Catalina, who is trying very hard to suppress the smug smile on her face.

“How many languages to you know, Catalina?” She already knows the answer to this question, but Catalina will happily tell her anyway.

“Five. Spanish, Latin, French, Greek, English.”

“Five languages, and you still don’t know how to use your words?”

Catalina simply stares at her.

“You would have been very upset if you knocked any of your paintings down, wouldn’t you?”

“Yes, but we couldn’t take it outside. You would have been upset if we crushed your plants.”

“Well, that simply reinforces my point. Violence is very rarely the answer when it comes to who you live with.”

“You’re threatening me with a lethal weapon right now.”

Oh, right, she forgot about them. Jane looks down at the stakes, flinches again, and throws them unceremoniously to one side. “Fine. We all need to work on discussing things, and remember we all have our part to play. Anne’s doing the dishes now -” There’s a clatter from the kitchen – “I’ve been taking out the rubbish; can you tell me your royal responsibility, or do I have to check?”

Catalina’s eyes are everywhere but on Jane. She brushes a bit of powder off of her sleeve, and mumbles “Dusting.”

~~~

“Look what I found.”

Parr looks up. It is a whole entire person Anna has come to show off, which usually isn’t something Catherine needs to see – it does not pay to get attached. This girl has her long hair tied up, dyed an almost neon pink at the ends, and is clad in one of Anna’s oversized fur coats. She seems to be faltering under Parr’s gaze, trying to make herself look as small and insignificant as possible.

“I see no plastic in the drawing room,” Catherine says to von Kleve, as a warning.

“What? No! No, no, no. Not that. Big smile, Katie.”

The girl’s lips curl into a rictus grin, revealing a set of fangs not unlike Parr’s own.

“Oh!” Immediately, Catherine’s attitude shifts, and speaks with a soft, comforting voice (she hopes), “Okay, hello. I’m Catherine Parr, of the Westmorland Parrs, and this is Anna von Jülich-Kleve-Berg of the Holy Roman Empire. Neither of us are going to hurt you. Please, take a seat.”

She gestures to a nearby chair. The girl walks over to it, unsteady on her feet, and sits down.

“It’s been a bad week,” she mumbles.

“Tell us about it.”

“Well, it started with a night I couldn’t remember, which always freaks me out, and then I was really sick, and then I’m pretty sure I died – no, I did die… I died…” She goes quiet once more, aghast at the revelation.

“Found her ripping some dude’s throat out behind a nightclub,” Anna explains, then shrugs. “It happens.”

The girl shuts her eyes tightly, as if she is trying to block out the memory. Parr takes her hand, and gives it a gentle squeeze. “Katie, is it?”

“Or Kate. Or Kat, or Katherine – but, that’s you as well. I’m rambling.”

“That’s alright. The transition can be stressful. May I call you Kat?”

Kat nods.

“Good. Now, from what you’ve told us, it sounds like nobody explained to you how this works. What is it that you think is going on?”

“’M a vampire. Right?” Parr hums an affirmation, and Kat laughs, without humour. “And, because I’m a vampire, and I was going insane with how thirsty I was and because he wouldn’t stop talking and he kept touching me after I told him not to…” She looks to Anna. “That man. He was my boyfriend. I killed my boyfriend.”

It’s usually cold in the house, but it seems to get even colder after that statement.

While Catherine intimately knows the feeling of wanting to murder your former significant others (Thomas – Foul rake! Blackguard! She shall curse his name after death and beyond!), she is aware that this may not be the case for Kat. Most couples these days actually quite like each other – one need not rely on a husband to vote for them anymore, after all. She’s been looking out for someone like that, but she hasn’t found them yet. Maybe someday.

There have been so very many days…

Thankfully, Anna is there with a kind word, so she need not answer nor dwell on her failure to find love. It is just one word, however, and it is not spoken with great compassion.

“Condolences?”

Kat waves a hand, shakes her head. “The only good thing about dating Francis is – was – that he gave me a place to stay. Everything else… I don’t think anyone will be that upset he’s dead, put it that way.” Her voice drops to a whisper. “It was so easy. Too easy.”

Well, it’s good to know that nothing of value was lost, at least.

“Subtlety and control are the results of practice,” Catherine tells the girl, “and that will come, in time. Until then, since the one who turned you is not around to help, I humbly request that you allow us to assist you.”

“We have a spare room. Um. Not that you have to take it, or anything, but the option’s there -”

Kat cuts Anna off. Nobody’s had the gall to do that for centuries.

“Why are you doing this? Any of this?! You want something from me, don’t you? Otherwise, I’d still be out there, dealing with my boyfriend’s corpse! Be honest with me, please. What is it you want me to do?!”

She is looking into both of their eyes, searching for an ulterior motive like she knows it’s there – Parr gets that, unfortunately, and she’s disgusted that something has happened to the poor girl to prompt such suspicion and mistrust.

Catherine does not raise her voice, speaks calmly and carefully, just like she was taught. “We are not doing this in the hopes of a favour, or any material gain. We – or, at least, I – am behaving in this way because I want to see you turn out well. Perhaps there is a vain hope of a new friendship out of this, but that is the loftiest of my wishes, and you should not feel obligated to fulfil it if you don’t want to.”

“You’re the most interesting thing that’s happened in at least a decade,” says Anna.

“But you’re vampires. Why are you helping a competitor?”

“Why not? Just because we’re bloodsucking monsters doesn’t mean we can’t be nice about it. Plenty of fish in the sea.”

“Okay. Okay. In that case… might I ‘humbly request’… a hug, please?”

~~~

“How do you feel about it?”

Catalina does not turn away from her painting; yet another Spanish vista. She has been told that the Inquisition is over, that she can return for a holiday, but there is no doubt in her mind that what is there now must be wildly different from what she remembers. The latter is what she puts to canvas, to show off what she knows, what mortal eyes can no longer see.

“You shall have to be more specific,” she says to Anne, her voice clipped.

“You know.” She refuses to give Anne the satisfaction of looking at her, but she can feel the fluttering eyelashes, the lazy grin, just from her cadence. “Us. What we have.”

“What on earth are you implying?”

“That thing we do. The one where I press all your buttons, and you beat the shit out of me. Great way to work out that tension, yeah? But then there’s Jane – Plain Insane Jane – putting stakes in our faces and telling us to end it.”

“Would you have listened to her if she hadn’t?”

“Nah.” No hesitation whatsoever. No hint of shame. “But it’s fun. Don’t you think so?”

…Frankly, Catalina does not know. She knows it is not a healthy way of relieving stress. She knows Jane is justified in her motivations to stop it, if not her methods (though both of them make it difficult for her to use a softer touch).

But, if she is truly honest with herself, she likes to feel powerful sometimes. Yes, she is powerful when compared to a regular human – but that was true when she was alive, too. Now, she is no longer in the line of succession, she is no longer a princess. She is ‘just’ a vampire, and that fact irks her more than it should.

But she doesn’t tell Anne any of that. She puts her brush down, and turns to the source of her self-reflection. She’s hanging in the air, as if she were watching Catalina from an invisible sofa.

“You’ve been out drinking, haven’t you?”

Their kind can, in fact, get drunk. It’s more of a roundabout process than it is for mortals – one must find someone that’s absolutely cup-shotten, take them somewhere quiet, and… share their blood alcohol content. Catalina knows this because Anne is a master of the process.

“Of course I have!” Anne replies, with a funny sort of smile. “That’s why you go out, why Jane goes out. To have a drink!”

Oh, she definitely has been. She’s wearing the silly spectacles again, the ones where you can’t see her eyes properly.

“I’m not having this conversation with you while you’re out of your wits,” Catalina carefully enunciates.

“I always have my wits. Do you even listen to my jokes, princess?”

“You’re drunk.”

“And? You don’t talk when I’m sober, you won’t talk when I’m toxed – what is it that you need me to be for you to be honest?”

There is a knock at the door, and Jane’s voice comes through loud and clear. “Catalina? We have a guest.”

That’s interesting. They don’t often have guests – well, not ones that aren’t ‘invited for dinner’, and Jane likes to keep that private, if it’s her. It can’t be Parr or von Kleve; Jane would have said as much.

Perhaps it is someone important, she thinks, and immediately her mood sours.

“Who do you think it is?” Anne asks.

“I don’t know. All I ask is that you don’t make a complete fool of yourself.”

“And what if I do?”

“Then I take no responsibility for your actions.”

-

“She’s very new, apparently,” Jane tells them, and she is doing only a slightly better job than Anne at holding in her excitement. “She doesn’t remember who turned her. Cathy thinks it’s Thomas, but you know how she is.”

Yes, Catalina does. Thomas may be responsible for a lot of things, but if he showed his face in this part of town, he’d probably find himself dismembered by his very angry ex-wife.

They reach the top of the staircase. Below them, on the ground level, Cathy is speaking quietly to – good Lord! That woman’s hair is pink! How is it that vibrant a shade?!

Anne gasps in delight. “A baby! You’ve found a little baby, Cathy!”

“I’m not a baby. I’m nineteen.”

“Exactly. Two-digit age. Baby.”

“I apologise for her conduct,” Catalina sighs. “Someone had a bit too much to drink, and she had too much of them. I am Catalina Trastámara de Aragón.”

“And I’m Anne. Sometimes.”

The girl blinks. Probably thrown off by that introduction. “Oh-kay. Uh, well, I’m Kat Howard. Katherine, actually, but you see how that will cause problems. I’m moving in with Cathy and Anna, and Anna thought it might be good to introduce myself.”

There is an image of vampires being solitary creatures, living in ruined castles and moping about in their every waking hour. It’s not untrue, but Catalina hated it when she had a go. Eternity? With no-one around her? What torture!

No. Ever since she found Jane sobbing in front of her own grave, since Anne had her chance encounter with a Spanish princess, she’s resolved never to be alone again. She shall, of course, extend that invitation to this new girl.

It’s practically her duty.

“I’m pleased to make your acquaintance, Kat.”

~~~

Vampires own nightclubs.

That makes sense, right? They only operate at night, they attract a crowd, many people there aren’t expecting to remember what happened there, only that they had a good time and feel terrible in the morning, if they make it that far.

Well, Anna doesn’t own a nightclub. She owns a chain of 24-hour off-licences. But, she can hypnotise the bouncer into letting them in, so that’s alright.

The music thrums in place of Kat’s heart as she watches the mass of bodies swaying and jumping with absolutely no sense of rhythm. Coloured lights flash, the DJ plies his trade, glasses clink and sweat permeates the air.

Anna is watching only her.

“See anyone?”

Kat scans the crowds, a grim expression on her face. “No-one looks particularly appetising.”

“Well, of course they don’t. We’re not looking for the cream of the crop here, we’re looking for someone who deserves it.”

Kat leans her head on her hand. Anna told her she could come to her for anything – so, Kat had, when she started to feel hungry again, and so Anna planned this little night out.

“There are two choices,” she’d said. “Either you pick someone out yourself, or you go mad with hunger and some other poor sod ends up like your boyfriend.”

“You’re sure of that?” Kat questioned.

“Oh, yeah. I speak from experience – I’ve always regretted what happened to the Duke of Lorraine…”

Anna had refused to say anything more about that.

Kat has… mixed feelings about what happened with Dereham. Okay, she’s horrified that she murdered him, but she doesn’t feel bad that she wiped that arrogant look from his eyes for a few seconds (before he, you know, died). He didn’t care that she was sick, didn’t answer her texts when she told him her reflection had vanished, or that she was bleeding from her eyes – and as soon as he got back from his work trip, he dragged her to a nightclub to ‘show her off’ and pretended nothing was wrong…!

…Okay, she’s getting a bit heated. The man’s funeral was three days ago. No point in holding a grudge, now.

“What about that one?”

Kat follows Anna’s gaze. A man is swaggering over to the bar with a confidence that nothing about him implies he’s earned. She gets the feeling this man used to be handsome, or liked, and no-one has told him otherwise just yet.

“Dunno. Maybe.”

“Do you want me to stay?”

Kat automatically bites her lip, before remembering that’s probably a bad idea now. She doesn’t want to be alone, exactly, but at the same time…

“Is it alright if you hang out slightly further away?” She asks. “If I need your help, I’ll laugh really loudly.”

Anna smiles in acknowledgement, nods, and wanders off. Kat might be wrong, but she seems almost gleeful.

Thankfully (or not), the once-handsome man notices her staring, and saunters over. Kat’s skin crawls.

“Hey.”

Kat gives a small, brief smile in return.

“You here alone?”

She risks a quick glance over to Anna – she still has an eye on her. Kat isn’t alone. “Yeah. Just… needed to get out, you know?”

“I do.” He smirks, points to himself. “Henry. You know Tudor Real Estate?” She does, and the man grins at the recognition she must be showing. “I’m the co-owner.”

Kat doesn’t want to say the wrong thing, but this guy has only a passing resemblance to the man on the ‘for sale’ signs.

“Must be an important job,” she tries.

“Very. My brother relies on me for a lot.” Oh, okay, he’s the brother. Wait, the brother she’d read articles about? The one who got acquitted last year? “Sometimes I just need to blow off some steam, you know? Have some fun. Speaking of, can I buy you a drink or two?”

Wow. That look in his eyes. He clearly hasn’t changed as much as the judge thought he had.

“I don’t drink… alcohol.”

He scoffs. “Listen. You heard how important I am, right? Nothing will happen to you without my say-so. We can have fun if you just let me help you.”

This man is made of red flags, isn’t he? A blind woman could see the warning signs. He’s a creep with overly-inflated self-esteem, seems to have spent his whole life getting everything he’s ever wanted…

And that means he’s perfect.

“I guess you’re right,” she says, quietly. She doesn’t have to fear his kind any more. “I am here for a good time. If you’re offering…”

Henry grins. “Anything you want, babe! Name it, and it’s yours!”

“Anything?” Money and connections won’t protect you from me.

“Anything at all, princess.”

“Hmm…” Kat makes a show of looking him up and down. Yes, this is the one. “Maybe we can take this somewhere private?”

Henry is clearly thrilled at the prospect. He grabs her hand, roughly (though Kat is sure she could break his arm if the need arose), and leans in close.

“I know just the place.”

He leads her away, to a location where there are no witnesses, no-one to save him. From across the club, Anna gives her a thumbs up.

Kat returns the gesture.

-

She comes in the front door with her phone in her hand. Henry has a Wikipedia page. Not very long, pretty much goes on about his brief stint in custody and that he’s Arthur Tudor’s brother.

Or, was. They might have to change the tense, soon.

Cath is on the sofa, chatting quietly with… Kat wants to say… Jane…? Yeah, Jane sounds right. She’s friendly enough, but always seems like she’s on her second-last nerve.

“How did it go?” Cath asks.

Anna grins. She’s been like this all night, and Kat feels conflicted about all the praise she’s received.“Oh, fantastic! Kat was a natural; that idiot fell for it hook, line, and sinker.”

“Turns out I have a vendetta against people who can’t take ‘no’ for an answer,” Kat adds.

Parr’s smile grows sharp, but her eyes still sparkle. “Well, there won’t be any shortage of those. Come, sit with us.”

So, Kat does. The things they speak of are so normal, Kat is initially confused. Jane’s gardening is a topic of discussion, as is Cath’s ever-expanding collection of stuff she finds interesting. When Jane asks about Kat’s “little slate-thing”, they both listen with rapt attention at her explanation of modern technology.

Kat had forgotten what it’s like to have people listen. It’s a shame she had to die to experience it.

~~~

“Yes, I’ve received a notice recently about outstanding bills owed – no, no, don’t shut off the – listen to me. The account has been paid in full. Enter that into the system. Okay, great. Thanks for that – no, no, everyone makes mistakes. Alright, bye.”

Anne hangs up. Great, power bills are sorted.

Contrary to popular opinion, she actually does do her share of work around the house. Yeah, the dishes are her least favourite task. Vampires shouldn’t have to do the dishes. But, that doesn’t stop her from helping in other ways.

She’s just about to start dialling the telephone company, when there is a knock at the door. Few are brave enough to do that at this place. As she stalks over, she wonders if it might a debt collector – if it is, that means she can have a snack, too.

The heavy oaken door swings open with an agonising creak, and the eyes of the figure on the other side glow in the evening gloom.

Oh, it’s that pink-haired girl. Katie, maybe? Anne can’t actually remember her name, and at this point she’s too afraid to ask.

“Hi.” The girl waves slightly. “Can I come in?”

Do you really want to? Anne thinks, but she says, “Uh, sure.”

With a sigh of relief, Kiara steps over the threshold.

“Apparently I called you a baby last time you were here,” Anne says. “Sorry about that. That’s not fair to you, and you don’t scare the shit out of me like an actual vampire infant would. But, I’m guessing you’re not here for an apology.”

Kitty smiles awkwardly. “Uh, no. I’m here to try and fix your computer. Um, the little television-box-thing you never use?”

“Oh! That! Yeah, I never knew how to get that thing working.”

“Yeah, no promises,” Kelly says, “but Jane thought it might help you… connect.”

That really gets Anne’s attention. She’s not surprised it was Jane who told her, because of the way Kim described the computer, but that part about connecting.

Anne wants honesty, for once. If Kat (that sounds right) is offering, she will take it.

-

To Anne’s surprise (and shame), Kat is able to get la machine infernale up and running in just a few minutes. She explains the mouse, the monitor, and the programs built into the operating system. The computer is not to get wet, nor is it to be fed. Do not sacrifice anything to it in an attempt to make it work properly.

Why Kat felt the need to include that instruction is a mystery, but it was probably necessary.

“Now, I had this whole speech with my step-grandma – back when I talked with my family – and I’ll give the same to you. Don’t believe everything you read on the internet. A lot of it’s lies, or personal opinion. On that note, not everyone you talk to is who they say they are. Don’t do things like send money or give out personal details if someone asks, and don’t meet with someone without people around.”

“Okay, I’m absolutely going to do that last one – but for the rest of them? Sure!”

Kat genuinely smiles. Wow, when was the last time Anne did that, and didn’t eat the person afterwards? Must have been ages, because it feels like she’s come across an oasis after months in a desert.

“So,” she goes on, “what exactly is the internet? I know I pay the bill for it -” ‘pay’ is a strong word - “but I don’t actually know what it entails.”

“Okay, well, you know… books?”

“Yes.”

“You know the television?”

“Yeeesss.”

“You know those coffee shops where people yelled at each other about philosophy, in the eighteenth century?”

“Yep, yep, yep.” Even though she was never invited, the sexist pricks.

“The internet is all of those things together,” Kat explains, “but worse.”

Anne gasps. “I love it already.”

-

The room is dark. No lights, curtains shut. The only source of light is the faint white glow of the monitor.

The internet is, as Kat had warned, a shitshow. Anne thinks it’s just the best thing. University professors and the lowest common denominator share the same spaces, and send vile, scathing messages to one another over fictional characters. Maybe she should do some research, just so she can play along. It’d be just like her days at court, getting one person at another’s throat, playing them off each other… ah, she misses that, if nothing else. It’s just not the same, now.

Oh, but then there are the videos. Little mortal Anne would never have thought it possible. What an idea! What awful and wonderful things humans create when they’re not being killed!

Anne’s exploration is interrupted when the light from the hallway fills the room.

“Ah. So you haven’t left.”

Catalina? Come to check on her? Anne turns – yes, it is her, likely wondering why her evening hasn’t been ruined yet. Or, maybe not. Anne has a terrible habit of putting words in other people’s mouths.

“You haven’t been downstairs this evening,” Her housemate continues. “Jane was worried about you.”

Anne doubts that’s true. Not that Jane doesn’t worry, she worries about almost everything (who cares if her teeth show when she smiles?), but she would be thrilled to know Anne is being quiet.

“Just looking at things,” Anne mumbles.

“Hm. Ominous. What ‘things’?”

Well, the best way to explain would be to show, right?

Anne plays the video. Normal night sky, a deep navy. Then, violet, then orange, and the fiery sun rises over the horizon, accented by the crimson heavens.

There’s a thump from behind her. Catalina has flattened herself against the opposite wall, eyes wide, fangs bared.

“I will not die so easily, Boleyn!” she snarls. “I’ve survived assassination attempts before, and I’ll do it again!”

“I’m not trying to kill you, girl! It’s a video! Do you almost die every time you put the sun in one of your paintings? Because that would be a much bigger problem than me showing you this.”

She presses the button to make the video play once more, and makes a show of standing in front of the screen, conspicuously not combusting.

Catalina stares at her. Then, at the monitor. She approaches, slowly.

“Can you make it go again?”

Anne does. The sun is reflected in Catalina’s eyes for the first time in over five hundred years.

“…I miss it, sometimes.”

Oh God, it’s happening, Anne thinks. Out loud, she says, “Miss what?”

“The sunrise.” From the sound of her voice, calm and quiet, Anne gets the impression Catalina’s not really here. “My home. My family. It doesn’t matter how far away I am, in years or in miles. They’re gone, and the name Trastámara means nothing.”

Oh, that’s it. Of course it is.

Anne did not what it was like to be a princess in the early 1400s, partially because she wasn’t born yet. She knows from her own experiences with Whatever the Fuck the Sun King Was Playing At that the nobility was constantly having to be perfect at all times; not even a twitch of emotion could play upon your face, even as you drain all your resources to support the near-impossible standards of fashion, or it could easily be all for naught.

She’s just been thinking, maybe, something like that might be why Catalina has the sort of aversion to talking about her emotions that would normally be reserved for holy symbols.

“Catalina. You’re not a princess anymore.”

Catalina sneers, all traces of vulnerability gone. “Yes, you have taunted me about that many times before.”

“Not a taunt.” Sometimes. “A reminder you no longer have to try and be perfect. I’m not gonna tell any peers of the realm if you feel sad sometimes.”

“So you feel the need to drive me to madness in the hopes I accept your view?”

Okay, so maybe Anne’s been a little coarse. In fairness, she tried passive-aggressive behaviour and it didn’t work. There’s a reason she goes after Catalina, and it’s not just because it’s easy.

Anne points to herself. “Unstoppable force.” To Catalina. “Immovable object. You move, I stop.”

“…Right. Okay.” A pause. “I know, logically, that you are right – about that particular thing. But, it makes me feel like I’m ignoring part of myself.”

“Just have the good without the bad. If the King of Spain has anything to say about it, kill him and rule the country as their immortal god-queen.”

“I would never be so rash,” Catalina huffs. “I’ll try. Just… don’t mock me for it. If I’m keeping at least one good thing about my life, it will be threatening anyone who insults me with imprisonment.”

“Yessssss…”

Both Anne and Catalina jump at the voice from outside the room. Anne acts first – she opens the door a crack, and sees Jane’s eye on the other side.

“You’ve been at it for two hundred years,” Jane says. “Two. Hundred. Years. I don’t care if you don’t get along straight away, let me have this.”

And, fearing her ire, they do.

~~~

Anna’s on the roof again.

There are two main reasons for this. One, her room is in the attic and it’s the easiest way out of the house. Two, it’s a good place to sit, look up at the stars (at least the ones you can still see, anyway) and think about things.

Kat is on her right, arms around her knees, looking up at the moon. Anna does not think she’s paying much attention to it, however.

“Whatcha thinking about?”

Kat doesn’t answer straight away. “Just how things are better.”

“…They are?”

“I’m living… uh, residing in a house with people I actually like. This is the first time that’s happened since I was about eight, I think.”

Wow. Anna hadn’t had a terribly good time when she was alive – no rights, no fun allowed, go marry some dude you’ve never even met, and no you can’t have fun then either – but Kat’s life might beat out Cathy’s hopeless search for love, in terms of tragedy.

“I cannot truly speak for you, but I have found this…” Anna waves her hands, trying to find the right way to put it, “whole thing to be very affirming. There is no-one to hold you down. No-one to stop you from doing what you like. Well, except priests, but they can be ignored, mostly.”

“You don’t brood about it too much?”

“Why would I? It’s the only reason I’ve been able to see the things I’ve seen. To be here, now, talking to you.” All because she told the wrong (or right) person about how bored she was. Of course she would accept the offer to have fun, even if the whole process wasn’t. “Do you?”

Kat stops to think again, so that’s a ‘yes’. “I’m still getting used to it. But, I don’t mind it. I’m not scared of the things I used to be afraid of. That’s good, right?”

“Sounds good to me. But, if you falter, that’s okay, too. We have supported Cathy, who was the youngest before you, we can do the same here – so long as you support us in turn.”

“Oh, yeah. She’s got that thing about finding the one.” How does Kat manage to fit so much bitterness in only two words? “Don’t get it. She’s got people who love her already. You, and those three around the corner. She doesn’t need them.”

“That’s a very good way of putting it, actually.” Anna’s argument against serious dating has been that three of the people Parr’s courted have tried to murder her, and her ex-husband technically succeeded. It hasn’t worked, but maybe a more positive viewpoint might win out against two centuries of stubbornness.

“Anna von Kleve.”

von Kleve looks down. Ah, speak of the devil. She’s on the balcony below them.

“Cathy! Kat has had some good thoughts about love!”

“Oh? How wonderful.”

She doesn’t seem like she thinks it is, though. She almost looks angry, with the hard eyes and pursed lips and the red-brown mottled book in her hand -

Oh no.

“I think, Anna,” Cathy intones, her voice sharper than any stake, “that we should talk about personal responsibility first.”

#the cradle will write #six the musical #not the historical figures #but that won't stop me making references to them

[snakesnack6]

Youtuber AU!Six the Musical

(Written this few months back and it’s very long, sorry)

Headcannons of Ladies and Waiting and The Palace : here

Catherine of Aragon:

 Guides/Explanations and has her own interview show

Guides as in taking a topic like Taxes, and simplifying the topic enough that adults, teens, and children could understand it

Simple enough that children can understand,but educational enough that it can be used in classrooms and businesses, and such to help people learn taxes and how to do them

Her interview show at first seems like a professional interview with yellow blank room, and two seats until you hear the questions

Questions range from” What is the meaning of life to you?” To,  “Do you know why the chicken crossed the road?”, or even just,” yes or no?”

These are all fan questions, and Aragon always have someone else pick the questions,so they turn out random and weird as possible

A fan made a collage of pictures of Aragon when she reads off a question and has a face of regret because she has to ask it

One of the highest subscribed channel in the group

Has a show with Anne on The Palace, called the The Vs Series

Anne Boleyn:

Mainly Game Commentary and Prank Videos

Starting doing youtube,so she could be home more often for Howard

Also does Comedy sketches w/ Howard and Anna

Help start  The Vs Series with Aragon because they were just so competitive with each other so much it became a regular thing and dragged the rest of queens with them in order to form teams

Streams herself DJing once a week or making a playlist with fans

Currently teaching Jane and Aragon how to play Overwatch,so she can get a team

Dancing or doing something ridiculous off camera while another queen is recording

 When Parr is streaming, Anne either goes to Parr’s room or chat inorder to ask questions like “If Neil A. is just alien backwards, does that mean the moon landing was fake?” to make her lose her place and leaves

Enjoys doing  voice recognition for controls or games that chat can interact with like Keep Talking and Don’t Explode or JackBox Party

Jane Seymour:

DIY and Baking/Cooking Videos

Mainly does DIY when she collabs,but fans enjoy it

Her cooking videos are much relaxing and calming like JunsKitchen and  HidaMari Cooking

Baking videos are a 50/50

It can be calming, and her having fun, or it is a version of  Seymour embracing her inner chaoticness 

Food dye is everywhere, Jane is  on the floor laughing, some possibly might be burning but it's fun to watch in the end

Has a garden and lives on small farm

Has a pig named Chris P. Bacon that shows up in some videos 

Goes to Aragon, Parr, or Anna for a taste test first before going to Anne and Kat

Fans sometimes refer her as Mama Jane, or Mama Seymour but she doesn’t have a clue why 

Anna of Cleves:

Workouts, Parkour,and Dog Vlogs

Workouts can pertain from high intensity cardio, and zumba, to sometime calming as Yoga

Convinces the rest of the queens to do them with her

Usually has a goPro strapped on her for Parkour videos

 Sometimes she trades out Parkour for rock climbs,hiking and skateboards

90% of these type videos are with Anne and Howard

Dogs vlogs are when she is going about her day with her dogs, their care route, or just when she just straps a go pro and lets them run around.

Her dogs consist of a Pitbull, Mastiff, German Spaniel, and the newest addition, a Senior Golden Retriever 

When drama is happening, the camera cuts to her just chilling on the couch with the dogs

Streams/Records herself gaming once in a while, usually when Anne needs a teammate

Other highest subscribed channel in the group

Katherine Howard:

Vlogging,stories, covers, and original music

Did make-up tutorials when she first started

Her vlogs are recorded over the week, and almost doing a recap of it in a single video

Her covers, and om are are her highest viewed and liked videos

Does some challenges with Anne and Anna on her channel

Used to mainly edit Anne’s videos before trying branching out to her own channel

Joins Parr in her reactions or reviews

Had to take a hadius for ‘personal reasons’

Comes back and starts streaming  mainly with Anna, and Aragon

Mainly it’s them taking, making jokes,singing and playing cards or something  

Or its them building some like a table or engineering a whole machine/robot

Their highest viewership was when they started to mess with the programming in a few roombas,somehow added a voice interface and module to them, and the rise of the roombas began

Long time fans notice that she is happier and seems to be enjoying the building than tutorials, which many  have noticed she stopped doing entirely 

Collabs with LiW(Ladies in Waiting) in some of each others’ covers or songs

Catherine Parr:

Mainly Book and Movie Reviews

Also does live reaction with the group

Has a different personally for streaming 

For  streaming like it will start  8 pm and will end between 12-6 am

It's mainly her going deep into theories,unsolved mysteries  and Controversies and possibly solving/answering them

Bulletin boards everywhere,articles everywhere, string everywhere

A truly chaotic stream ,but Cathy does enjoy it

Most likely has her own subreddit and pages for each topic,so fans can send info to help her

Definity running on coffee by hour 3 of the stream,but will stop the stream that day with she either reaches a certain amount of coffee, or certain number of donations

She doesn’t reveal the number so keep going without fans worrying,but they figure out at some point

Anne sometimes shows up to ask a question that throws her off and leaves or joining in the debate entirely  

The one that started The Palace, the queen’s group channel

Edits videos for Aragon and The Palace

(I have more headcannons for this as well as a few fanfics such as how they all met and how Anne and Kat, found out they were cousins with Jane. I have to deiced if I’m gonna post the stories on here or on ao3,but we’ll see)

#six the musical #six the musical imagine #six the musical headcanons #six headcanons #six musical #six the musical fanfic #six the musical au #six youtuber au

[crashclatterbang]

Six - Catherine of Aragon Edition (Part 1)

Trigger warning for a shooting - stay safe!

Aragon doesn’t get paid enough for this.

“I asked for a Grande, iced, sugar free, vanilla latte with soy milk!” The angry woman at the counter snapped.

Catherine Aragon, known to her friends as just Aragon, rested her head on her hands as the woman, whose name might have been Karen, ranted on at her. Aragon had just got the woman placated with the promise of another coffee, which made her coworker Renee roll her eyes in frustration, when the next customer stepped up to the till.

“Hi, welcome to Bean and Gone, what can I get for you today?” Aragon chirped, customer service smile firmly in place. If she said those words again she thought she might scream. Working in Bean and Gone coffee shop was all right sometimes. Free coffee and 10% off baked goods? Hell yes. Obnoxious coffee orders and screaming customers? Hell no. Unfortunately, Aragon was a broke college student who needed money and Bean and Gone was one of the best coffee shops for their workers - as in, she’d need to do something serious to get fired. Sometimes she wished she would get fired. The job was so ridiculously boring sometimes.

Oh.

The screaming was new - and definitely not boring.

So was Renee diving at her, knocking her under the counter as muffled bangs and the sound of shattering glass filled the store.

Oh.

Oh hell no.

Aragon was not paid enough for this crap. The man with the gun was yelling now, rough voice audible above the screaming, which was quieter now.

“Give me your money!” He was saying, over and over again.

The barrel of the gun suddenly appeared over the counter and Renee swore under her breath, hand clutching Aragon’s harder.

“Open the till!” The shooter barked, voice loud in the sudden hush of the coffee shop.

Neither Renee nor Aragon moved. The gun jerked and behind them the chalkboard cracked with a groaning noise.

“Get up and open the till!”

Aragon and Renee locked eyes. Aragon shook her head and made to get up but Renee pushed her back down. Her stick arms were surprisingly strong - but then again it might just be Aragon going into shock. That was possible.

More than possible, Aragon thought hazily as Renee gave a snarky reply to the shooter that she didn’t hear and got a bullet in the leg for her trouble. Renee collapsed, face bone white and clutching her leg. Aragon, brain still fuzzy, realised that she had to stand up now. Even though she was shaking, she managed it and faced the shooter. He had a very ordinary face. One that you could walk past in the street every day and never notice. Our Lord in Heaven, Aragon thought, even as she hauled her customer service smile back onto her face. Hallowed be thy name.

“How can I help you?” Aragon smiled.

Thy kingdom come, thy will be done.

“How...how can...” the shooter spluttered. “You can open the till, you stupid cow! I need the money!”

On Earth as it is in Heaven.

Aragon tilted her head to the side, surveying the shooter with an intensity that she knew would make him uncomfortable.

“Why do you want the money?” She asked.

The shooter looked throughly confused. She suspected that people with guns usually didn’t get asked those kind of questions. Then again, she was kind of confused where he got the gun from. This was Britain of the anti-gun laws. You couldn’t exactly walk into a shop and buy one.

“Why do you want the money?” Aragon asked again.

The gun was held loosely in the shooter’s hand. He wasn’t focusing on it anymore, nor on the other people in the shop.

“I want the drugs. I want it all to go away,” the shooter whispered, face crumpling.

He suddenly looked very young, face prematurely aged by whatever his drug of choice was.

“Ok then,” said Aragon, voice gentler than she thought it could ever be. “Ok, hand me the gun and I’ll give you all the money you want.”

He looked uncertain. Aragon kept her face open and reassuring, hand slowly extending across the counter. The shooter suddenly brought the gun up and Aragon flinched away but all he did was drop it in her hands. She opened the till and took out a £20 and held it out for him. As he was reducing for it she brought the hand holding the gun across his face, making sure the butt of it caught him. He crumpled to the ground, a puppet with his strings cut. One of the people pressed against the wall, a student at her college who she vaguely recalled seeing, darted forward and nudged the shooter with a toe.

“I think he’s out,” he reported and looked at Aragon with a kind of reverence. “That was so brave.”

Aragon waved off the praise and told him to call for the police and an ambulance. As soon as he had, she dropped to her knees by Renee, who had managed to tie a tourniquet around her own wound, took her cross necklace out of her work shirt and pressed it to her lips, murmuring prayers under her breath.

“Come on, Aragon,” Renee said, hauling herself up into a sitting position. “You know I don’t believe in that stuff.”

Aragon gave her a severe look but dropped the cross, just as the police burst through the door.

-:-

Aragon was exhausted. She’d been answering the police’s questions for what felt like forever and then gone to try and see Renee in the hospital but had been turned away because it wasn’t visiting hours. All she wanted was to sleep. Even dragging herself up the stairs to her dorm room was too much effort, but then again that was too much effort on a normal day. Aragon made it up the last few steps, fumbled with her key and then opened her dorm room door to a... party?

Anna Cleves saw her first and let out a cheer. She only had one shoe on and there was a half empty wine glass in her hand.

“There’s our brave crime-fighting girl!” Anna cheered, slurring slightly. “To Catherine Aragon!” She gave Aragon a lopsided smile, lifting her glass. The other queens cheered back at her, even Anne Boleyn, albeit reluctantly.

Jane Seymour slipped through the girls, all of whom were grinning at her stupidly while doing their form of ‘dancing’.

“How much has Anna had?” Aragon asked.

Jane’s smile widened and she held up five fingers.

“She was worried about you.” Jane said and shook her head. “We all were, Aragon.”

Aragon grinned back at the blonde and let her pull her into the dancing. Anne Boleyn plopped a glass of wine in her hand.

“I haven’t poisoned it, I promise!” Anne yelled above the music, causing Arrie to wince.

They all danced for a while, getting thoroughly drunk, before someone banged on the wall and told them to shut up. So now most of the girls had left, leaving just Jane and Aragon. Jane’s deft fingers were braiding Aragon’s hair, something which never failed to calm her down.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t be there earlier.” Jane murmured, fingers stilling in Aragon’s hair.

Aragon twisted slightly so she could hold Jane’s wrist lightly, as her hands were occupied.

“I wouldn’t have had you there for the world, bunny.” Aragon said, using Jane’s nickname that only the queens called her. “It was terrifying.”

Jane pulled her fingers out of Aragon’s hair so she could give her an awkward backwards hug. Aragon turned in Jane’s arms so she could hug her back properly, feeling Jane’s rapid heartbeat against her.

“You kept calm though,” Jane whispered into Aragon’s ear.

She was close enough that Aragon could feel her lips moving against her ear. It sent a shiver running through her that she didn’t want to acknowledge.

“How do you know that, bunny?” Aragon asked, the thought suddenly occurring to her.

“It’s all over college,” Jane said back, blinking her eyes innocently.

Oh.

Oh no.

#six #six the musical #musicals #west end #musicals fanfiction #six the musical au #au fanfiction #catherine of aragon #anne boleyn #jane seymour #anne of cleves #katherine howard #catherine parr #series #part one

[sweetestrequiems]

kit’s release radar + reflecting on things

alright so let me give y’all a normal post now aka the release radar for this account just without dates.

they’re all under the cut cause it’s a LOT.

aka, look under the picture of the broadway queens. thank you.

-foreboding (targets part 2) will come your way soon. jo and i need to finish writing and editing. 

-chapter 2 of out of a book is in the works. it will be a parr-centric chapter. -out of a book will go between boleyn-centric/parr-centric until i start working on chapter 6. chapter 6 and onward should be an even split or just about. -the title of the chapter is Scones and Coffee, by the way.

-aragon angst is finally being written. i was going to have the nightmare aragon has be set in historical times, but i can’t see myself doing it because i am not confident enough with history. so, i will set it in modern day instead.

-the boleyn fluff i promised jo is being plotted out as we speak. im gonna turn it into beheaded cousins fluff because i felt bad for asking for kitty angst lmao

-i might do some queen x reader one shots. they’re gonna be super cute, too. i think my favorite idea i had for one was jane seymour’s. cause stargazing and picnics. yeah. -if you guys actually want some queen x reader stuff i’ll write it for y’all.

-my apex legends fic titled spark of hope will have a release date pending in the next two months. with apex legends’ lore of it being a bloodsport, i have to properly think of the trigger warnings, tags, and so on. i also have to replay through titanfall 2 for the twentieth time, and play more apex legends to actually memorize the layouts of the maps (world’s edge/kings canyon). -i will probably release spark of hope as an Ao3 exclusive. i have the good understanding that i might have followers who are very sensitive to certain triggers involved in this, so i don’t want to put anyone in harm’s way.

-with new day, same queen getting ready to finish up in the next two weeks, it gives me more time to openly take requests and stuff. so if you have a prompt you’d like for me to do, once part 6 is finally up, come into my ask box and drop it in there. -cleves is part 4, she comes out friday. -seymour will be entering the world of the living next friday, april 17th. -howard will be the last queen to wake up on friday, april 24th. -pretty much a complete series which wow good job kit you did it lmao

-jo and i (mostly jo) are planning for a total of FOUR parts for targets. the last part is just us indulging in the softness of parrlyn but that’s besides the point. but, because the events of parts 2 and 3 are so emotionally charged, we decided to make it parrlyn because boleyn seems to be the only one that has been able to calm down a very angry parr. and it gives us two an opportunity to write out the complexity of parr’s emotions.

-so do y’all remember the ask that boleyn got from kitty about a prank? -rest assured i am actually writing that because jo and i accidentally plotted that out. -honestly it is the most hilarious thing we have thought of. -can you just imagine aragon dumping a whole ass bucket of water on boleyn and screaming “THE POWER OF OUR LORD AND SAVIOR JESUS CHRIST COMPELS YOU!” -part of me wonders how i think of this shit and i’m sober 99.9% of the time.

-sending in asks for the queens is ALWAYS welcome btw. i love responding as the queens and it gives me motivation to write for the queens that answer so... go for it.

-i am most definitely doing Six x [insert show here] stuff. will it probably be parrlyn singing something cute? yeah. -do i care? not really because it gives me an excuse to be a nerd. -i mean... writing fanfiction makes me a nerd but besides the point!!!

-speaking of, Six x Soho Cinders is apparently the actual brightest idea i’ve had on this account because almost if not 70 notes on it???? -like thank you??? so much???? -i honestly thought y’all were gonna be like “oh no here she goes again” but y’alL REALLY ACTUALLY MADE MY HEART HAPPY

i honestly cannot stress enough that i am grateful for all of you that follow me. for the ones that like my stuff. the ones that reblog. the ones who reply. ALL OF YOU. we are in hard times. the world is fucking terrifying. i mean, i’m an adult for fuck’s sake but i’m scared too. i write for you guys. let me explain what i mean:

i have spent a solid fifteen of the twenty years i have been alive on a stage of sorts. under a spotlight, or in an ensemble. i’m a semi-professional musician. i am a novice/amateur actress. i have played in a symphony orchestra.

during hard times is when people turn to the arts. whether they love seeing dancers fly across the stage, actors tell stories, visual artists create landscapes and portraits of scenes unknown... they’re all turning to these people for something i like to call a gift.

my former saxophone instructor is a well known man. he plays in a world renowned saxophone quartet. this man took a chance on me, and taught me the greatest thing i could ever learn as an artist of sorts. 

the arts, performance or visual, are a gift. you are taking your raw emotions, your feelings... you’re making yourself vulnerable for the world to see. you are giving these people a light in their darkest times. you are helping them escape their cold realities for just minutes at a time. you are giving them a piece of you that you would only think to give to your significant other. you are taking something from your heart, filled with your emotions, and allowing someone else to be a part of that. and that is the greatest gift of all.

truth be told, that’s what i consider all of this writing. an art. it is as valid as dance and as music. as valid as painting. as valid as ceramics. as valid as any breathing and living art form out there.

so, for me to see that you all do enjoy this? it lets me know that this gift is well received. it’s... loved. it's in the right hands. 

so from the bottom of my heart, thank you. thank you so much for not only allowing me the chance to do this, but for letting me into your lives.

i will see all of you later with the tumblr release of out of a book, and a video. 

much love to all of you, kit

#Kano Announcements #Thoughts with Kit

[slutforbroadway]

DISCLAIMER: this is just my opinion. these are all people I personally know and love, so there is a tiny bit of bias (whoops). I have my reasons for why I chose which person, which I'll give down below, but you don't have to agree with me! there very well may be someone else who would be perfect for the role that I just either forgot about somehow or haven't heard of yet! I have not seen show and I also don't know the exact vocal ranges of the queens since I haven't been able to find sheet music so I'm just going off previous work. this is all in good fun, I just needed something to do and I've never really tried my hand at dream casting. all I ask is you please be respectful, I'd be more than happy to discuss my picks and look into different options 😊

Catherine of Aragon : Jasmine Cephas Jones. Jasmine has such a badass aura around her and I would love to hear her sing "No Way." I think she could play Aragon really well and do the role justice

Anne Boleyn : Isabelle McCalla. This may have a tad bit of bias to it because I absolutely adore Izzy, but I think she would make an amazing Boleyn. She has a heavy dance background so she could do the chereo in the show, and I think she would have a lot of fun with "Don't Lose Ur Head."

Jane Seymour : Caitlin Kinnunen. Okay I know I'm sorry I put Caitlin and Izzy in a show together but I just love them so much. I would also kill to hear Caitlin sing "Heart of Stone." she kills her ballad numbers in The Prom so I think she would do amazing in this role. She also has that "mom friend" vibe that Jane gives off which I think is really important. I also think this is a totally different type of show from what Caitlin's done in the past which I think could be really interesting and a lot of fun.

Anna of Cleves : Lizzo. Yeah this is the stuntcasting I was talking about but listen. I saw a textpost floating around maybe a week or so ago about how Lizzo as Anna of Cleves would be the only appropriate stuntcasting for this show and I agree 110%. I forget who made the post but if I find it I'll edit this post and link it. Lizzo is a friggin queen and I think she would do a great rendition of "Get Down."

Katherine Howard : Taylor Louderman. Again, there's bias because I love Taylor but I do think she could nail Katharine. She has that fun youthful energy, because as we know Howard likely died before she turned 20. She has a fun and bubbly personality and an incredible belt so I think she could sing "All You Wanna Do" really well, ending included.

Catherine Parr : Ariana DeBose. I don't know what it is, but this one just kinda clicked for me. It made sense and I couldn't argue with it. I loved her when she was in the ensemble of Hamilton and I think she did amazing in the Donna Summer musical. The first time I listened to a song from Six was when I watched their performance at the Olivier Awards and I immediately thought Ariana would be a good Parr.

Well that's it! That's who I, personally, would love to see play the Queens on Broadway. If you don't agree, that's great! I'm open to listening to other ideas and opinions. There were definitely multiple people I was considering for some roles before I ended up settling on one person. All I ask is people be respectful 😊

#six the musical #six #catherine aragon #anne boleyn #jane seymour #anna of cleves #anne of cleves #katherine howard #catherine parr #broadway #bway #musical theater #musical theatre #dream casting #erin rambles #jasmine cephas jones #izzy mccalla #isabelle mccalla #caitlin kinnunen #lizzo #taylor louderman #ariana debose #six uk #six chicago #sixcago

[beimanorthrun-blog]

Top womens dating profiles

Professional Online Dating Profile Writers For Women: World's Best Since '09 Some people are afraid to be too bold in their dating profiles.  What other advice would you give to a friend who is thinking about senior dating? Show the woman you are looking for she is more than just someone to date or have a good time with.  If you really want to date a Ukrainian lady — you have come to the right place! Below are a few of the top tips to make your online dating profile the one that attracts all the women.  Once you have a good picture in your mind of the kind of person that you are looking for, get ready to tell your story.  They paint a picture of a unique person, with passions, experience and an abundant personality.  You will attract the right kind of man.  Video chat is yet another useful instrument of getting along with Slavic girls.

Professional Online Dating Profile Writers For Women: World's Best Since '09 Thanks so much again I can't wait to see what kind of awesome dudes this profile attracts! If you prefer a more intimate experience with one on one assistance, you can also sign up for a coaching package with Joshua Pompey.  The Importance of You and Her A proven strategy to up your online dating profile is to not just write about who you are but to also write about the kind of woman you are looking for.  This is where a good friend is invaluable.  Therefore, choosing appropriate pictures to include in your profile will take some careful consideration and time.  Finding one or more clichés in your dating profile is a sure sign that you need to relax and open up about yourself.  Few men are going to look like Georgy Clooney and few women are going to look like Jane Seymour.

1000+ Single Women Dating Profiles from Ukraine Online Have you ever considered traveling to a marvelous Eastern European country, filled with rich historical heritage, exquisite foods, intriguing traditions, and, of course, attractive young women? You certainly do know your stuff.  This is something that Hey Saturday has been embracing since we launched in early 2013.  Have a Friend Help You Out Writing about yourself is hard.  We met on OkCupid back in 2013 and to this day, meeting her was the best thing that ever happened to me.  Am I ready to deal with the emotions that will inevitably come as I get back into the dating game? You may visit a girl in a romance tour or initiate a video chat with her — right from her profile page! Many of our dating preferences are formed in our 20s and 30s and, as a result, we may still think that we need to find someone physically stunning or wealthy to be happy.  Sign up now and put yourself on the fastest path to the happiness you deserve! Whether you are a newbie to online dating, a frustrated vet, or simply want to ensure that you are putting yourself in the best possible position for success, having an online dating profile that is optimized to perfection is the fastest way to achieve the results you are looking for.  If you love wearing bright colours, then wear them in your photos.

Top Online Dating Profile Examples to Attract Women If you really are new to online dating and, for whatever reason, you want people to be aware of that fact, you could imbue it with a positive spin.  You can see numerous profiles below.  Additionally, value-centered activities are a great way of showing you are always looking for deeper connections with other people.  With this service you are also going to receive a lifetime photo review free of charge.  However, most people have subpar dating profiles, so making sure yours perfect will put you leaps and bounds above the rest! Our staff will put you in the best position to make this happen.  But without online dating, who knows what my life would look like now! All questions and emails will be responded to within 24 hours.

Top Online Dating Profile Examples to Attract Women So, try to focus on characteristics that really make a difference — like personality, character, values, and passions.  Last chance before I peace out.  If you are at the beginning of your senior dating journey, you probably have several questions.  Be honest about the traits you want her to have, what values are important to you in a woman, and anything else that is important for your woman to have or do.  A great rule of thumb is to go with the — 70% about you and 30% about her.  Once you have finished a first draft of your profile, edit it for wishy-washy language and clichés.  When you find yourself talking in generalities, look for a specific example, or, even better, a story.

1000+ Single Women Dating Profiles from Ukraine Online Why spend another day attracting less than desirable men when you could be attracting the highest quality men today? If you have been out of the dating game for a while, putting yourself out there is a big step.  Popular vacation spots Brides from Ukraine love to travel.  Literally nobody knows who he is! Ask questions that your ideal man or woman would find fascinating.  Visit Ukraine itself If doing things the easy way is not about you, then your best chance to meet single girls from Ukraine is to pack your bags, book a ticket, and go on a romantic trip.  Good news is this is exactly what the 8 dating sites below provide! Expert Tips for the Best Dating Profile Photos for Women Are you ready for the busiest day of the year in the online dating world? This is our proudest achievement and a statistic we strive to maintain each and every day.

Top Online Dating Profile Examples to Attract Women Pictures will provide the women you are attracting to directly see what you and your life look like.  Ask one or more friends what they appreciate most about you. .  How can I write a great profile? Talk About Your Passions, Not Your Hobbies Another comment mistake that people make when writing their dating profile is to list the activities that they enjoy without giving any context.  Many men find it challenging to write about themselves.  See that beautiful woman sitting next to me? All About the Photos Although the written part of your online dating profile is essential, choosing the right photos to include is equally important.  Photos give women a real-life glimpse into who you are and will help to either attract or scare them off.

Online Dating Profile Tips If not, we strongly suggest you do because Ukraine is totally worth visiting even if you are not interested in finding a Ukrainian bride now.  When you arm yourself with one of our custom made profiles, you will no longer just attract any man.  Hiding who you are hurts you in two important ways.  Be the most important thing in the shot.  Talk about the experiences that have made your life unique.  There are heaps of that make men more attractive to women and incorporating them into your online dating profile is just one way to help you step up your online dating profile game.

#How #to #Write #an #Unstoppable #Senior #Dating #Profile