#i think that out of all crew members Olu and Lucius are the most like... outwardly loyal? towards Stede

[lunaescribe]

An Interracial Reading of Ed & Stede

After writing about how the racial dynamics of Ed's character in the show affect his choices, it got me thinking about the interracial romance dynamics set up between Ed and Stede. (This is a little more Stede focused than Ed since I already wrote about Ed at length)

Unlike some shows OFMD recognizes systems of privilege and oppression in its world. Colonialism, racism, and homophobia all exist-but no marginalized person in the show is forced to have an arch revolving only around these oppressive forces. The sea within the show, is especially used as a metaphor-and transgressive space where some of these oppressive forces lessen in power, or are more easily resisted. (I.E. Calico Jack's comment "Anything goes at sea" in reference to homosexuality). The show has deliberately set up piracy to be an anarchistic, and rebellious force to traditional society's colonialism and heteronormativity-which is a key element to how Ed and Stede come together.

Stede clearly comes from a place of white, male, and wealthy privilege. It lends itself to a lot of arrogance that he charges into situations with, and a very valid reason much of the crew and other characters are frustrated with him. He isn't afraid to invade spaces which often belong to marginalized people, the poor, POC, and women (Like Spanish Jackie's).

He underestimates piracy is often a forced profession (as told to him by Olu in episode 1) to those in the most marginalized positions. He can be dismissive of the crew's frustrations or worries often (fails to notice when they are in danger like Lucius going missing)-and doesn't often comprehend how racial violence works. When the English Officers are making microaggressive comments against his crew in episode 1 he does appear uncomfortable, but also fails to entirely understand the weight of those insults to his crew or stand up against them (even if it would've been dangerous). The indigenous group are right to be wary of him in episode 2 and address his internalized bias and racist reaction when he assumes they are cannibals which ate the hostages. He is a self-focused white man, even if he is capable of emotional intelligence and empathy with others.

Rightfully so, the Revenge crew has plenty of reasons to want to mutiny and kill him-as a privileged outsider who's impulsive decisions, and invasion of space for the marginalized, is going to put all their lives in danger (as he does in episode 3 on the Spanish Ship).

Despite his very expected of-the-time-period (And unfortunately still persist in modern times) ignorance, privilege, and microaggressions Stede still appears to be an outlier of the elite white men of his society. Unlike the English, or French aristocrats he does not showcase any overt prejudice to members of his crew-and even seeks out their advise and council (when his own excitement hasn't gotten him to make an impulsive decision). In fact by coming to sea-Stede surrenders a degree of his privilege, since it is the pirates like Spanish Jackie, Blackbeard, Calico Jack, and even Izzy who through experience and physical force have earned the most power and respect on the high seas. Being a white, wealthy, man doesn't carry the same immediate access to power as it does in Barbados-and Stede is seemingly willing to make to make that sacrifice to learn along the way. While part of this must be a-credited to the excellent writing on the show more focused on creating a modern, inclusive, experience-credit must also be given to the writing for showcasing historical subtext which demonstrates why Stede would have more progressive viewpoints.

Throughout history, there are multiple instances where marginalized groups end up bonding together-because they're all pushed to the outskirts of society. It makes sense a lot of the most staunch abolitionists of the 19th century (amongst white people-since there were plenty of POC who did the majority of the work) were women. Enduring discrimination is painful, but can have the affect of building empathy-which seems to have been one of the effects in Stede's case. Episode 1 establishes what a menace Stede is to his more marginalized crew-but it also importantly showcases how intensely marginalized Stede was in his own society. Stede experienced abuse in his own house AND from his own peers due to his overt lack of traditional colonial masculinity.

We're told he cries easily and picks flowers (Stede confirms he did), which make him the ire of the more traditionally masculine boys in his school, and provokes their physical and mental abuse. Stede's queerness has ostracized him from his society and some elements of his privilege ever since he was a boy.

While his marriage does not continue his overt abuse-it's a further situation of Stede trying to exist in a colonial role that is just miserable for him as a queer man. What's interesting to how Stede responds to his marginalization though-is he chooses to walk away from the abusive heteronormative, colonial, society-rather than become embittered (and lashing out-which he does do once he tries to return in episode 10) trying to exist in it. It's part of the reason he feels a kinship to the other pirates (even if it isn't alway reciprocated or over-assumed on his part), and finds life more comfortable amongst others who have also been outcasted from colonial traditional society. He finally has a space he can be openly queer (Not in the immediately seducing men sense-but in ignoring the demands of traditional masculinity sense)-because it is a transgressive space in and of itself. I would argue one of the most important pieces of Stede's arch in the show-is realizing resisting the colonial, violent society he was told is normal-is not something to feel guilty about-but needed for justice and happiness.

As much as Stede questions what he's done or who he is becoming upon killing Nigel, when he actually pauses to consider his death-he finds he doesn't feel guilty at all about it. He recognizes what an abusive and horrible colonial force Nigel was. What he really feels guilty over is the harm he could've caused to leaving his family vulnerable without him-or I would argue-the overall guilt he feels each time he transgresses against the traditional societal role he was told he should respect. It's here, he begins to let go of his privilege that was apart of that abusive colonial system, which also abused him.

Enter Ed. After hearing stories of his success and adventures, and freedom of anarchy Stede is instantly starstuck by the idea of Blackbeard before even meeting him. Ed is equally intrigued by Stede before they meet-someone who doesn't seem to be overwhelmed by his reputation-and also an apparent 'gentleman' at sea-a persona difficult to exist in a hyper-violent power structure of pirates. I would argue Ed's initial interest in Stede is split between that intrigue-and as we learn at the end of episode 4-his plan to kill him and steal his wealth & assets. And why wouldn't he? As far as he knows Stede is just another wealthy white man who would put him down the moment he gets a chance.

That is until Stede wakes up. As others have pointed out, immediately, without even knowing he is a Captain Stede treats Ed with respect as though they are equals. Ed is clearly perplexed by that, and it extends his fascination toward Stede even though he is still heavily invested in his long-con. However it's when Ed shows interest in the untraditionally hyper-masculine fabric-and Stede responds not only with equal adoration, but invites Ed into his secret cabinet of more, his perception of Stede begins to shift. Stede is not the same as the previous condescending white aristocrats Ed has come across previously who would've never invited him to touch their things-none the less wear them in the next scene. Their clothes swapping also gives us the visual cue of the equal playing ground Ed and Stede meet at on the sea. Stede still carrying some of the power of his wealth and whiteness, and Ed carrying the power earned from being Blackbeard for years, and the biracial influence able to earn loyalty from pirates of different identities across the board. Not at all how it would have been if they met in Barbados.

From there, relieved to find someone who has an appreciation for the same untraditionally masculine interest they share-the pair open up further. Sharing their mutual exasperation with the role they've been forced into by society, due to their marginalization.

By the end of the episode-bonding on their mutual eccentricities they've developed in response to learning to cope and make life interesting for themselves-Ed is already beginning to doubt his plan. It's obvious on his face when he turns from Izzy after sharing his plan to murder Stede. This long-con of playing hyper-violent, hyper-masculine, to survive has become draining.

The following episode we get an instance of Ed learning high class manners from Stede for said con, when a French Officer racially insults him referring to him as "Donkey". While Stede recognizes Ed is upset-he does not seem to understand entirely why it's so deeply harmful to him. Clearly having an old wound reopened Ed is especially eager to go to the fancy French aristocrat party to prove to himself, and perhaps even Stede, he can be more than those insults. That he could even pull off the con if he suceeds.

Initially, Ed is proud he's somehow outdid Stede at the party, a white man in his own element, by being more 'liked' at the party. Stede however, knowing society well, is most likely familiar enough to be wary of the overt or passive aggressive racism that exists in these spaces. He warns Ed they can be fickle. We know first-hand he's been mistreated for his own version of masculinity, so he's more aware of what discrimination looks like in this setting, as opposed to the previous microaggressions he underestimated from the officers He's not at all surprised when Ed leaves the party distraught-and his desire to get revenge on the French aristocrats is an extremely huge shift for him and Ed.

While the comedy of the scene is overt-many have pointed out Stede is shockingly unfazed with the obvious destruction and clearly loss of life on the French ship. It's burning behind them as people jump into the sea and Stede smiles proudly. It's a massive change from Stede's panicked response to 'accidentally' killing Nigel. He's quite content-proud of himself! Just like Nigel, the aristocrats represent and showcase colonial violence, their deaths are all played for comedy and without sorrow (unlike Karl or Lucius) because the show is so anti-colonialist-and has no sympathy for those who represent it. While Stede struggles to feel righteous anger for himself in terms of responding to Nigel's oppressive force-he is plenty able to on Ed's behalf.

For Ed, this act completely changes how he sees Stede. In this scene, Stede has not only demonstrated he is willing to be rough and fight back when needed (not just a simple tender rich man), but he willing to betray his own class and race for Ed. "Cut loose" is a significant line-cut loose as in-have fun, be unhinged, but also cut ties from his own people. It's only BECAUSE Stede does this we can even have the moonlight "you wear fine things well" scene. Ed no longer sees Stede as a rich target he won't feel bad taking out-he sees someone who cares about his feelings and willing to resist the forces colonialism with him and more importantly FOR him.

"You wear fine things well" is an unwitting seduction on Stede's part-because to Ed it is reassuring him-he is just as fine, worthy, and precious as he hoped to be as a boy. Stede is showcasing he does not view Ed in the stereotypes of his race at all, which have marked many of Ed's interactions at sea for the majority of his life. By the end of this episode Ed is infatuated with Stede: they're similar in their eccentricities, Stede empathizes with his plights, and he's enchanted by his courage to defy convention. Not that he'll ever lay his heart bare to tell Stede at this point. Especially when he sees Stede doesn't go in for a kiss like he does. He's never had this kind of equal and relatable relationship with another person-and most likely never assumed it would be with a white man.

So he starts flirting.

Many have pointed out the "Stab me" scene is clearly Ed's attempt to flirt-to get Stede physically close to him, it's also demonstration of how in a hyper-masucline setting so much bonding is done via violence. We can imagine this may have been how the sexuality went between Calico Jack and Ed. But Stede's version of masculinity, romance, etc, is so different from this high seas violent courtships-the attempt goes over his head. That's why Ed is agonized with the push to kill him by Izzy in episode 6. He does his best to convince himself, like Izzy says, Stede is a pet, a passing infatuation/lust, but the reminder of his childhood trauma from the 'fuckery' is too much to bear. Stede is not like his Father, or other white men he's killed, he's Stede, he listens, he's already protected and defended Ed once-and joined Ed in his absurd behavior stepping outside of all masculine expectation with him, so he's willing to open up and tell Stede what happened-especially since Stede seeks him out after his panic attack.

Obviously this is an extremely intimate scene on its own, but the fact Stede is someone Ed can fall apart in front of, cry, express his distain for the tenants of his own power, brings Ed even closer to him. This kind of emotional showcase would've had the opposite effect with any other men Ed knew as Blackbeard. But unlike Jack, or Izzy, Stede makes so much space and empathy to comfort Ed's emotions. It's not often a man of color's vulnerable emotions are put on screen as a central important plot point to be given weight and tender time to.

It's worth noting how Ed being the seducee and attempting to anxiously win back Stede's affections is a departure from historically racist depictions of interracial romances on screen. Quite often in the past we saw the POC member of a pairing containing a white person, was often characterized as being more animalistic, rough, or aggressively sexual. While Ed is clearly more traditionally masculine and hardy as pirate-he's given the role of the infatuated one-the one pining tenderly (plus we see Stede commit more violence on screen than we do Ed!). Ed's given a beautifully rich emotional score of being romanced, in a setting on the sea where the pair have equal footing of privilege. They're pair of equals bonding over their odd (to everyone else) behavior.

While Ed refers to himself as a Kraken, a mythical monster-that imagery is part of the racialized violence he'd endured all his life. The fact in that scene Stede does not reinforce that imagry but instead tells Ed he's his 'friend' is so monumental for Ed. As someone who has been on a journey of learning violence is at times unavoidable to survive against oppressive forces, Stede answers Ed's murder plan with empathy and relief. It completly undercuts the racist idea that either one of them is more 'naturally violent' with Ed in tears over the fact he no longer wants to commit murders to survive. Ed's humanity and tender emotions are put at the forefront of the show multiple times-asking the audience not to stereotype him in a caricature-even if other white characters are willing to. (Which is why fan depictions that lean into making him a literal monster are regressive at least, and racist at worst)

Episode 7 and 8 really showcase how Ed has no idea what to expect of Stede. He spends most of episode 7 feeling rejected and far too vulnerable (after that bathtub confession), since Stede has not openly returned his flirtations (And perhaps rightfully wary from his previous experiences with white men) and it is only when Lucius spells out to Ed that the entire expedition is meant to be a gift to Ed from Stede, he relaxes. Once he knows Stede is somehow returning his affections, he reconsiders his plan of running away and agrees to co-captain with him.

When Calico Jack shows up in episode 8 he throws a wrench in everything-but also provides us interesting backstory for Ed and his relationships with white men. He tells Stede "You two have a lot in common", which can seem like a humorous throw away line since Jack and Stede couldn't be more different in their presentation of masculinity. I would argue what Ed sees and is referring to-is that Jack and Stede are two white men who seem extremely uninterested in prescribed colonial masculinity and that is what stands out to Ed. That isn't to say Jack's version of toxic, violent, frat-boy, immature, masculinity is healthy-but Ed can recognize they are both outliers from proper navy officers. (Ed's perspective is demonstrated in episode 9, when he tells Chauncey "you all look alike", a joke yes, but also how much these proper colonial white men blend together for Ed.)

Stede has made enough of an impression on Ed though-and shown him such a space of alternative masculinity-he is willing to sacrifice EVERYTHING for him by getting back on the ship instead of rowing away with Jack. Once again the English officers attempt to re-affirm their structure of colonization on the sea-such as when Chauncey tells Ed "He's from my world not yours" in regards to having the right to execute Stede. Ed however returns the previous gesture of Stede's- betraying his legacy as a pirate by taking "An Act of Grace".

Piracy is once more a metaphor for colonial resistance since Chauncey attempts to argue Stede isn't a 'real pirate' and therefore can not have an "Act of Grace". But once again we see Stede's chaotic, more tender version of masculinity shine through, as his 'piracy' is proven from his simple abduction and nourishment of a plant-not any amount of bloodshed. Chauncey throws a fit, as it is another example of piracy and masculinity not playing by traditional colonial rules.

Despite being thrown back into a colonial setting at the reform school-Ed and Stede are now in position where both have been entirely stripped of their power. It is what lets them kiss on the beach without the imbalanced power dynamics of colonial society-and just themselves. It's truly touching moment because it's the pair of them wanting each other, even without all their fineries or power attached-which is why they're in the same outfit. It's a really remarkable way of doing an interracial relationship in media-Ed and Stede's power dynamics are communicated via their outfits throughout the show.

When Stede chooses to return to his family-it's only after he receives a scolding, for betraying the colonial role he was given (A Father, obeying naval officers, etc) he chooses to leave Ed feeling such immense guilt for straying from his designated role and privilege (plus the idea his tender form of masculinity as emasculated Blackbeard). There's even an element of white privilege Stede is able to return his comfortable life immediately, rather than being tracked down by the English for abandoning his post. But once home, the show demonstrates so well-and Stede can finally acutely see-he never belonged in this abusive colonial system. And the people who manage to find happiness within it-only do so by deviating (Mary having her affair, widows riding themselves of toxic husbands, etc) from that abusive system's demand. Stede leaves Barbados, free of guilt from Chauncey's death, and walking away from the abusive system this time recognizing it is the right thing to do. Most significantly, Stede relinquishes one of the sources of his colonial privilege-wealth.

It's a complete commitment to change, the world of piracy, and Ed. It's Stede finally recognizing violence against colonial forces (such as killing the Badminton twins) is needed, because they are so oppressive and violent in and of themself. It's Stede recognizing walking away from colonial forces (the heteronormativity of his previous life) is needed for happiness and freedom-and that includes sacrificing the comfort of wealth. Stede returns to the sea without the pomp and flash of his former privilege, ready to commit to a life of rebellion with Ed, against that world. It makes sense coming from this place of privilege, and choose to let it go (rather than having it revoked) Stede finds himself in a 'happy' ending at the end of Season 1.

Ed however, is ending the season feeling the brunt of colonial violence. Stede leaving him (which we can perceive is how he sees the interaction, since if he imagined Stede dead he probably wouldn't of thrown out all his things) is an example of Stede behaving how Ed feared an upper class white man would see him as. Disposable, which is what drove his anxiety in episode 8 to leave with Jack "You would always see what I am". Ed has been trying to avoid being hurt this entire relationship with Stede and he failed. Izzy's threat, another example of white violence, pushes Ed over the edge to make him shut down completely to protect himself all this white violence. It's a violent change for Ed because not only did he believe someone saw him past all the stereotypes he'd been pushed into in his life-he also must be furious at himself he dared to think Stede could be better than his previous interactions with white men.

Ed has every right to be furious and feel deeply betrayed. I would even argue he has every right to attack Izzy after Izzy spent so much time threatening him and berating his new-found more tender masculinity. It's worth noting if you watch Ivan and Fang in episode 6 they remark how nice it is to see Ed so 'open and available' and when Ed is singing in episode 10, Fang watches on with a tender sympathetic expression. The other men of color understood how monumental it was for Ed to have a chance to be seen as more than just a vehicle of violence. Unlike some people I don't think 'utterly heartbroken in a robe singing sad songs Ed' is 'true' Ed entirely. I think he still has plenty of chaos and anger against colonialism in him-but surviving via violence and constantly bearing his teeth has grown draining for him, and he would prefer to be softer and more expressive if he has the choice.

Stede completed his arch resisting colonialism-so I wouldn't be surprised if we DO get season 2 from Ed's POV. Stede's ignorance is part of the reason he did not pause to consider as much as he thought leaving Ed would help him-would also wound him. Stede returned to his privilege and power, and while it finally helped him see the light-it caused an immense amount of harm to Ed-and did not consider how deep his feelings were at all. It would be likely in a show that has done so well to set up a stage that an interracial relationship can flourish challenging previous structures of power, and putting two wildly different men on the same power level-it now shifts to the man who's at the crisis and crossroads of his identity like Stede was at the start of season 1. It's my hope season 2 would conclude with the pair of them standing firmly in their identities, knowing they can exist outside of the role colonialism attempted to press them into.

#ofmd #our flag means death #edward teach #stede bonnet #blackbonnet #ofmd meta #poc of ofmd #shit this is LONG #I'm sorry but this show is brilliantly written i had to scream #also #stop making Ed into a literal monster #PLEASE #this is very stede focused since I already wrote at length on Ed #my writing

[ourflagmeansgayrights]

The Best Revenge Is Dressing Well: The Izzy Hands vs Lucius Spriggs B-Plot

i have been seeing. some Takes™ (derogatory). about this storyline. about this b-plot in e5. specifically, about how this storyline starts. i have seen people saying that lucius was slacking off. i have seen people saying that lucius is the one to escalates things in that first conversation with izzy. i have seen people saying that lucius deserved to get singled out.

i'm here to say that all those takes are wrong. and in case some of y'all haven't rewatched this scene in a while, i'm gonna do a line-by-line breakdown of that scene to explain why

But First, Let Me Set The Scene

in episode four, the crew is literally being held hostage by blackbeard. which means that blackbeard is in charge of everyone. which means that as blackbeard's first mate, izzy is also charge. in this scene specifically, where izzy is yelling at them for eating, the whole crew of the Revenge all straighten up and lower their heads when he enters the galley. their body language shows that they know they're supposed to be listening to him (not that they actually listen, mind you. but they know they're supposed to).

the thing that a lot of people seem to miss, though, is that by the end of the episode, the situation has changed. in episode five, the crew is not being held hostage by blackbeard.

they're getting job training from blackbeard.

this is different from being held hostage by blackbeard. technically, if you think about it, this situation makes blackbeard and his crew their guests. very honorable guests, of course! it's still blackbeard, obviously the crew don't want to do anything to piss him off. but he's not exactly in charge of everyone the way he was when they were his hostages.

(yes, i know that ed is planning to kill stede, which probably doesn't bode well for stede's crew. but they don't know that, and ed isn't going to act like that. he's just gonna give his masterclass in piracy lessons like nothing's wrong)

what i'm saying is that going into episode five, izzy is no longer in charge of giving the crew of the Revenge orders.

there's another piece to this, though. because presumably everything in this episode takes place over the same day. ed teaches them some pirate skills as they raid the french ship, then after the raid frenchie shows them the invitation to the fancy party that he found on that same french ship, then stede, ed, olu, and frenchie all go to the party, leaving everyone else back on the Revenge.

here's what i want to point out: ed and stede are most likely not around for any of the subplot with izzy and lucius this episode. when ed says they're going to the party, the very next scene is the one i'm going to dive into shortly, the one where lucius and pete get caught hooking up. and the scene right after that is ed, stede, frenchie, and olu all boarding the french party ship. we get four minutes of french party ship before cutting back to our b-plot, where lucius is getting lowered down the side of the ship to scrape off barnacles. if ed and stede are still on the ship when izzy finds lucius and pete, they’re probably busy getting ready for the party.

so, just a recap of the situation before i get into the scene that sets up this episode's b-plot:

blackbeard and his crew are guests on stede's ship

earlier in the morning, ed's crew ran a successful raid as a demonstration for stede's and his crew

after the raid, ed decides he's going to go to a fancy party with stede and two of stede's crew members

and here are some things that we can infer from these facts:

the Revenge isn't going to be sailing around anywhere, since they need to be nearby to pick up ed and the others after the party

the ship is well-stocked after the raid that morning

there's not actually anything that urgently needs doing. both of the captains are off the ship. for everyone left back on the Revenge, it looks like they have some nice downtime.

Breaking Down The "Ooh, Daddy" Scene

(indistinct chatter) (shushing) LUCIUS (whispers): Shut the-- Shut up. PETE: I'm, I'm trying to be quiet. LUCIUS: You good? PETE: I'm good.

so, the captains are getting ready for the party. lucius and pete were both present at the raid this morning. and they're hooking up in the galley while wee john takes a nap a few feet away.

"wow," you might be thinking, "i can't believe they would have sex in a public space like that! especially when they're at their job!"

consider this: they also live here. and aside from stede, olu, and jim, nobody on the ship has a room to themselves. if two crew members want to blow off some steam after a productive morning of attending Blackbeard's Pirate Masterclass, they don't have a room with a lock. there's not a ton of privacy. so they found a corner and tried to keep it down (and it really does seem like they probably tried to stay quiet while they were going at it).

another thing that's worth noticing is that pete and lucius are very clearly finishing up. they're standing up and straightening their clothes. and this is when izzy is walking into the room. he probably just walked in when they were finishing up just as a coincidence, but i've seen people suggest that he might've heard them earlier from outside and waited for them to be done. since i can't prove that this didn't happen, i'll be looking at this scene from both angles.

anyway. lucius and pete, having just finished hooking up, stand up and go to rejoin the rest of the crew. lucius turns around and sees this:

izzy, leaning against the door and staring at him intently as he sips a tin of Unidentified Beverage. and then we have this little interaction:

WEE JOHN: Oh, be a dear, and make me one of those, would ya? IZZY: No, shut up.

...during which Izzy only breaks eye contact for a few seconds. Idk how to make gifs so I'm just gonna describe it for you: Izzy begins to take a long sip from his drink and Wee John shifts, wakes up, and sees Izzy drinking something as Izzy's eyes are trained on Lucius, not moving. Wee John says, "Oh, be a dear, and make me one of those, would ya?" as Izzy drinks, eyes still trained on Lucius. Izzy lowers his drink and says, "No, shut up," and only as he gets to the word "up" does he turn his head to glare at Wee John. After a beat he looks back towards Lucius, and Wee John lays back down.

IZZY: Get back to work now, all of ya.

now, he says "all of ya," but he specifically is looking at lucius and pete when he says this. he's addressing wee john, sure, but john's not the one he's making eye contact with. this feels significant to me.

PETE: we are working... we just took stock of the rations LUCIUS: of the rations, yeah, and it turns out we are… (knocks) good. PETE: very good, actually.

interestingly enough, it's pete, not lucius, who first tries to make an excuse. lucius doesn't say anything at first, just adjusts his outfit, making eye contact with izzy as he does so. he agrees with pete's story, making a silly face and knocking on the barrel behind him, and his delivery is less hesitant, less "coming up with a halfhearted excuse in the middle of speaking" than pete. lucius only looks away from izzy when pete flirts very obviously, saying "very good, actually" in a tone and giving lucius's body a once-over. and i didn't get a screenshot of it, but lucius very quickly looks away (somewhere towards wee john's direction) with wide eyes and a shrug.

now. i know i said at the beginning that "all those takes are wrong," but i do actually know that interpretations are subjective. there are other ways to read these few seconds, but i would actually pin pete as the one being more insubordinate up to this point. he's the one who makes the very bad excuse despite how obvious it was what they were doing, and he's the one who blatantly flirts right in front of izzy.

WEE JOHN: Yeah, we all heard you. LUCIUS: Yeah, we love an audience.

so, as if there were any doubt, wee john confirms yet again that lucius and pete were just hooking up in the corner. both pete and wee john have acknowledged that fact more openly than lucius has. pete by openly flirting and giving lucius a whole once-over, wee john by basically just saying "yeah, you guys were pretty loud just now."

and lucius snaps back to wee john sarcastically, because of course he does. he's a sarcastic gay.

IZZY: Oh, I see. You think you're cute?

this is weird to me. this is incredibly weird to me.

the only thing lucius had said before the "we love an audience" bit was just going along with the lie that pete came up with. he didn't start off trying to make excuses, and he definitely wasn't doing anything to flaunt how cute he is. even his "we love an audience" isn't delivered cutely, he says it sarcastically like he's annoyed.

and yet, izzy puts down his mug and walks towards lucius. he delivers his "you think you're cute?" to lucius and only lucius. by absolutely no means is lucius the only one in the room who was "slacking off." pete was hooking up. wee john is asleep in a corner. nobody is working. but lucius gives one snarky line and izzy is already targeting lucius specifically. and lucius's snarky line wasn't even directed at izzy!!! he was talking to wee john!!!!

in my opinion, izzy singling lucius out at this point in the conversation is what started escalating things. suddenly, instead of izzy speaking to "all of ya," he is only talking to lucius. and for the fucking life of me, i cannot understand why that is.

(i mean, i can, but only from a perspective that is not flattering to izzy)

LUCIUS: Actually, I think I'm just so-so, but I've decided to carry myself like I'm cute. PETE: (laughs) Worked on me. IZZY: (chuckles) Ooh.

another iconic line from lucius spriggs, everyone.

this is the first time lucius directs anything that could reasonably considered snark towards izzy. and he says this line in a very joking way, smiling, and it gets pete to laugh (and flirt openly, again).

and then izzy laughs. and at first, lucius and pete keep smiling, like they're all laughing together.

IZZY: (forced giggling)

i genuinely feel like up until this point, the vibe in this room was very playful. wee john had asked izzy for a favor and just shrugged and gone back to sleep when told to shut up. pete halfheartedly lied and wholeheartedly flirted with lucius after being told to get back to work. lucius made a little quip about being so-so but having confidence, and when izzy started laughing along, lucius at first acted like izzy was being genuine.

like. i feel like izzy had a chance here to not try and throw his weight around and tell people what to do. he could've laughed it off and walked away, let wee john keep napping and let pete and lucius go do whatever they were gonna go do. but he didn't. maybe he felt like these three were being disrespectful, maybe he thought there were urgent tasks that needed to be done, or maybe he just likes telling people what to do. i dont know.

what i do know (despite how badly i wish i could forget) is what izzy does next:

IZZY: Ooh, ooh, Daddy. Daddy.

yeah.

he also. doesn't look away from lucius. once he starts saying daddy.

there are. two things that i think this could be about.

the first is if izzy, like us, only caught the tail end of lucius and pete hooking up. that means he's just saying this with no prompting. and the only reason i can think of for him moaning and saying "daddy" is because he thinks that's what lucius and pete's sex sounded like (and the way this came after lucius's "i carry myself like i'm cute!" and the way he made eye contact with lucius the whole time makes me feel like this is what he assumes lucius specifically sounds like during sex). and like, based on how he weirdly chose to single out lucius with his "you think you're cute?" line, this is not a nice imitation of lucius and pete. he's mocking them.

which, if i were pete and lucius, would make me feel very uncomfortable and violated.

the second possibility is if this izzy actually heard all of pete and lucius hooking up, and this was something he heard them actually say. which was not an option i thought of, but i saw someone else saying that this was izzy knowingly imitating the sounds of lucius and pete's sex, instead of just assuming he's imitating those sounds.

and if i were pete and lucius, this would make me feel even more uncomfortable and violated!!! there's no fucking privacy on this ship unless you're jim, olu, or stede, so there's zero doubt in my mind that everyone's kinks get aired out like dirty laundry. but someone making fun of those kinks is something else entirely!!!

either way, izzy makes everyone in the room uncomfortable.

idk, watching this scene, it looks like lucius is vaguely afraid. at the very least, he's uncomfortable and weirded out.

and i've realized that i've run out of images i can add to this post so the rest is just gonna be typed out:

IZZY: Your lot days of lyin' around doing fuck-all, it's through. You're all getting specific duties.

izzy shrugs off the awkwardness, looks at lucius for a moment, then shifts his gaze to pete and delivers his first sentence above. as he does so, he points his finger at lucius and pete, waving it between the two of them. when he gets to "you're all getting specific duties" he raises his voice and turns away, towards wee john's direction but not fully looking at him entirely.

LUCIUS: No thanks, Iggy. I only take orders from my Captain.

and now, twenty-nine images later, we get to where lucius "escalates" this conversation. frankly, i think the conversation was escalated when izzy said to lucius, "you think you're cute?" and it was definitely escalated even more by the "ooh, daddy" bit. lucius now feels very uncomfortable, and he lashes out.

remember: izzy is a guest. he's blackbeard's first mate, and blackbeard has chosen to stay on the ship as a guest and give the crew pirate lessons. like, i'm literally just going to link an old post i made about this line, because from lucius's perspective his bitchiness is so fucking warranted.

IZZY: My name is Mr. Hands, First Mate Hands, or God, as far as you're concerned. And I've got just the job for you... bitch. Follow me. LUCIUS: Yep, absolutely.

now, the thing with izzy is that he's not very creative and he's very bad at adapting to change or to new, unfamiliar situations. and ed sticking around a ship full of mediocre pirates to give them "job training" while secretly planning to murder their boss and steal his identity, which probably means most of these other pirates are gonna get killed or left for dead somewhere, is probably not a familiar situation for izzy. for him, the "uszh" is capturing ships in battle, making the crew repair the damage, and then executing the crew. so he's not used to a several days of job training with crews of weird misfit pirates.

so from izzy's perspective, i kinda get it. usually when he's hanging out on another ship like this, it's a literal invasion. he's used to barking orders at people and telling them what to do. he's used to hitting the backs of their heads when they're eating and he's used to telling people to get back to work. he's not used to taking other crews on raids like they're job shadowing him, and he's not used to being left behind on some other ship while his boss goes off to a fancy party with the captain of the ship he's stuck on.

i kinda get why his instinct here is "i'm fucking in charge here, who said they could have sex in their down time? why are they having fun, don't they know that blackbeard is planning to kill them all?" he's used to just bossing around the crews of ships they've taken over, not hanging out with them for a week.

i also think he specifically gets so nasty here and screams "bitch" in lucius's face because he tried to make fun of lucius and pete with the "ooh daddy" thing and ended up embarrassing himself. so when lucius called him iggy (justified, imo), izzy escalated that shit even further, stepping into lucius's space and practically spitting in his face when he called him a bitch. in his mind, he just embarrassed himself in front of some shitty pirates who are gonna die soon and don't even know it, and he wants to re-assert his dominance here. because god fucking damn it, he's in charge here. they don't know that technically it's still an invasion, but izzy doesn't know how to interact with a crew outside of that situation.

IZZY: Come on.

yeah and then we get izzy walking away without giving any specific duties to pete and wee john, just lucius. and lucius stays behind for a minute to talk to pete, then izzy screams "NOW" with a level of rage that feels really disproportionate to me, and then lucius runs after him and the scene ends.

maybe izzy was going to give “specific duties” to all three of them before lucius called him iggy. i don’t know. but we never see that happen, we only see izzy continue to seek out lucius for punishing tasks. the showrunners chose not to follow up on what pete and wee john did after the “ooh daddy” scene. and like, come up with whatever reasons you want for why that is. but izzy was already singling lucius out even before lucius finally snapped and “talked back” to izzy

In Conclusion

to recap:

in this episode, blackbeard is acting as a guest on the Revenge. he is giving them job training, but he is not functioning as their captor anymore

now that they're guests, izzy is no longer in charge of telling stede's crew what to do outside of "pirate lessons"

at the beginning of the episode they raid a french ship, which means they're all stocked up on supplies

stede and ed (aka the captains) are going to a party, leaving the rest of the crew with some down time

izzy does not know how to deal with down time on a ship that he has technically invaded and is technically still holding hostage, but he can't let them know he's holding them hostage

izzy especially does not know what to do with down time when his captain isn't there. he's in charge with no supervision. nobody is around to tell him to chill out

lucius and pete do not have a private place on the revenge to have sex during their down time

pete is the one to try and come up with an excuse for what they were doing

pete is the one to openly flirt with lucius in front of izzy

when izzy first singles lucius out, both pete and wee john have been more flippant about the sex than lucius

izzy's "ooh daddy" was an attempt to mock lucius, and it made everyone in the room incredibly uncomfortable

calling izzy "iggy" and being rude after the "ooh daddy” thing was incredibly valid from lucius's perspective

we do not see izzy give pete or wee john any tasks

and one more thing about this plotline that doesn't come up in this scene but is very important to understanding the situation:

nothing izzy makes lucius do actually needs to get done.

you don't need to know shit about boats to know this

all you need to know is that lucius doesn’t do any of what izzy told him to do, and we never see anyone else do any of what izzy tries to get him to do, and there are never repercussions for that.

the ship doesn't fall apart. they sail with no problem. everything with the boat is fine.

izzy was just bossing people around because that's all he knows how to do. and he singled lucius out specifically, for reasons i don't feel like arguing about right now.

and just to back myself up, that this is not about izzy making stede's lazy stupid crew do basic chores that need to get done and they're all bad pirates for slacking off, i present to you one of the screenshots from the DMs with alex sherman:

the sentence that gets cut off at the beginning is “These were supposed to show that Izzy is power-hungry but also just not that good with power.”

#ofmd #our flag means death #ofmd meta #lucius spriggs #izzy hands #dizzy izzy #mine #meta #txt #sc #og #s1e05 #wee john feeney #black pete #alex sherman

[elapsed-spiral]

Fic Delivery Service!

So, AO3 is still down and looks like it might be down for a while (boo, leave the poor website alone, ya weirdos).

In the meantime, if you're desperate for a fic, I've got the following fics of mine available as PDFs. As an added bonus, I can send them to the email address of your choosing using the burner email account I used to make my Google Docs SMAU. In other words, if you fancy reading any of the following fics as a PDF, Stede Bonnet can send them to you! DM me if you'd like any!

Cool collaboration(s) you should read immediately:

Work Experience: what if Ed went to meet Stede when the Revenge ran aground? And what if Ed became a member of Stede’s crew? And what if things kept escalating and… Canon AU. Mature. Co-written with Shearwater.

Really no excuse for how stupid these ones are:

Watch Out, Here I Come: what if Stede had been intentionally seducing Ed? Teen

Once More, With Feeling: what if Frenchie just fixed the season 1 finale fiasco because he’s the most capable guy on the ship? Teen

Talent Show: what if Ed was crass about his sexual preferences? Explicit

Capsize on Your Thighs: what if Ed rebounded onto Calico Jack at the end of season 1? Ed/CJ and Ed/Stede (but Ed/Stede is endgame, natch). Explicit

Your Feedback is Important to Us: what if Stede started holding open cabin hours to allow the crew to air their grievances (but was also very repressed and horny over Ed)? Explicit

Oh no Ed’s working through gender/class stuff (but make it funny):

Finery: Ed gets to wear a dress, Stede spontaneously combusts. Explicit

Tell More Tales: Stede isn’t the only writer aboard the Revenge. Explicit

Lovers and Madmen: Ed is hellbent on marrying Stede. Explicit

AUs no-one asked for:

Conflict of Interest: lawyer!Stede/businessman!Ed (read: gangster). Modern AU. Explicit

Intergalactic Tango: Space Waltz AU. Mature

Trade Descriptions Act: bailiff!Ed/estate agent!Stede. Identity theft but make it meet cute. Modern AU. Teen

Baddy Zaddy: Bridget Jones’s Diary style, former porn star turned sex shop owner!Ed/still unfortunately landed gentry!Stede. Novel length modern AU. Explicit

Prize Every Time: You’ve Got Mail-y secret pen pals but also business rivals. Novel length modern AU. Explicit

Your Favourite Song: locksmith!Ed/museum curator!Stede. Kinktober fill that somehow isn’t E rated. Modern AU. Teen

Draft Letter to Restaurant Downstairs: Google Docs AU with a (slightly) interactive element. Modern AU. Teen

Blind Date: Stede and Jeffrey Fettering go on a blind date at Ed’s restaurant. I think you know where this is going. Modern AU. Explicit

Different Dimension: ficlet that crams four and a bit AUs into 850 words. Modern AU. Teen

Stuck Still: British holiday resort AU feat. events manager!Stede and bartender turned fairy!Ed (it makes sense in the story I swear). Modern AU. Explicit

On the Job: “kidnapping” meet cute (but not actually. Again, I swear it makes sense in the story). Modern AU. Teen

Starring Jason Statham: another weird meet cute, courtesy of Jack and the Fast and Furious franchise. Stede/Jack, Ed/Jack and Ed/Stede (Ed/Stede is once again end game). Modern AU. Teen

West Ham Is for Lovers: Lucius has a new job. It’s going fine. Completely, totally fine. A meet cute fic about meet cutes. Ed/Stede but also Lucius/Pete, Lucius/Fang, Lucius/Izzy and Lucius/Olu/Jim. Modern AU. Teen

Proud: Ed attends Pride to get free mum hugs, Stede attends Pride to give free dad hugs. Modern AU. Teen

Conventional: back in the 00s, Ed was in a very famous movie franchise. Nowadays, he does the convention circuit. Modern AU. Explicit

KrakenAir: Stede and the crew are heading to Benidorm to celebrate Stede coming out. That is, if Stede's all expenses spared KrakenAir flight ever departs. Modern AU. Teen

Oh no there’s been a containment breach (aka non-Blackbonnet fics):

We Do What We Like (and We Like What We Do): A brief history of Ed and Jack. Explicit (Ed/CJ)

Fealty: Stede and Izzy make one another even more miserable. Mature (Stede/Izzy)

Contra Proferentem: Ed is a high powered lawyer and Professor of Law at the University of Cambridge. Lucius is not a high powered lawyer but he is a lecturer of English Lit at the University of Cambridge. Stede own a very nice cafe. Explicit (platonic Ed/Lucius, Ed/Stede, no cheating involved)

#ofmd fanfic #gentlebeard fanfic #ofmd #ofmd fic

[darkfire359]

My personal ranking of Izzy ships, based entirely on how much I like them:

1. Blackhands: My beloved toxic dumpster fire! Izzy just has so many feelings here, it’s hard to not want to focus on it. Probably a personal favorite just because of all the interesting power dynamics here (which I love). Hard to ever have a happy ending with this ship, but that’s okay.

2. Steddyhands: I feel like all my favorite fics are this. A good way to get the fun of Blackhands without everyone involved being miserable forever. I love it when the dynamic is “experienced vet helping new intern with world’s meanest cat.” I love it when the dynamic is “divorced couple get a marriage counselor, repair their marriage, also marry the marriage counselor.” And I love it when it’s just straight-up Ed and Stede conspiring together to seduce their grumpy first mate. So many fun takes on this!

3. Lusrael: I ship it more every time I see Nathan and Con do anything together. I think it’s the single most likely ship to happen in canon (not counting the Blackhands failmarriage). I think I’m personally just a little less excited by the dynamic in fics.

4. Gentlehands: Hard for this to not just be Steddyhands, but I do appreciate it on its own. Probably my favorite angle is “bitter rivals must team up to win back their ex, have hatesex, spend the whole time imagining their rival is actually their ex, accidentally fall in love.”

5. Calicohands: This ship made me actually like Jack as a character, sometimes. I think Jack’s style of affection of affection is something Izzy could actually accept (tackle-hugs, nuggies, friendly shoulder punch, etc) and while it’s not optimal, our poor baby might be touch-starved enough to like it anyway. I also like Jack having unrequited feelings and the resulting angst (in case you couldn’t tell from my #1 ship).

6. Jackie/Izzy: They’re actually friends, maybe! And Jackie would be the type of dom Izzy would love. Izzy does seem more gay than bi to me though, unfortunately.

7. Izzy/OC: Obviously highly variable. I’ve certainly enjoyed Izzy/Bryce from HoHW quite a lot, as well some other one-off portrayals of Sam. But #7 is probably appropriate in terms of how likely I am to actively seek out such fics.

8. Ivan/Fang/Izzy: I think I saw some art of this like once and it was good art. Also I see David and Con taking newlywed pics together and it makes me like Fang/Izzy more. IDK. They’re there, they know each other, it could happen.

9. Izzy/Roach: They both like sharp weapons. Roach at least tried to give Izzy a sandwich once, which was nice. But they don’t have much actual or implied interaction in the show.

10. Jim/Izzy: I’m very excited about them together platonically. Maybe it could work romantically? But unlike Lucius and Pete, Jim/Olu don’t come off as quite so poly.

11. Izzy/Pete: They could bond over being Blackbeard fans. They could get together by both dating Lucius. Possibilities exist.

11. Izzy/Frenchie: I’ve enjoyed some fics of this, but overall, I admittedly don’t see the appeal. Frenchie taunted Izzy with “In your face, Jizzy!” after he lost the duel. Izzy held Frenchie at gunpoint in a scary (rather than a sexual tension-y) way. It feels like this ship is just happening because Frenchie and Izzy are stuck on the same ship together post-e10.

12. Izzy/Buttons: Butthands is a terrible name. I think Buttons is in a monogamous relationship with the sea. Good art though.

13. Izzy/Wee John: John is big and could lift Izzy in a princess carry. I can’t think of anything else to say here.

14. Izzy/Olu: I feel like this would be a healthy relationship for Izzy, because Olu is the type of person who has healthy relationships. Therefore, Izzy would never go for him.

15. Izzy/Swede: I feel like Izzy would actually hate this. The Swede is probably the least competent member of the Revenge crew. This relationship would be a disaster and not in the fun way like Blackhands is.

16. Izzy/Mary: I really really like them platonically. So much. But I feel like a romance would make negative sense.

17. Izzy/Chauncey: This actually skeeves me out, no.

#izzy hands #Izzy/everyone #blackhands #steddyhands #lusrael #gentlehands #calicohands

[cupidsnumberonehater]

Draft but I thought I'd post this before season two comes out and rots my brain even more. Also this was made with a sort've "everything's figured out and everything's fine" sort of vibe in mind so 🤷

My friend and I somehow got onto the topic of what animals the crew members would adopt if they could but it ended up just being us planning a DogDad!Izzy AU

I drew things for it

We are ignoring any historical shit on the breed we chose bc we think it's a perfect fit so yk

Made excuses for why Ed would break his no pets policy

Made excuses for why Izzy would break the no pets policy

The dog's name is Mutt bc that's all Izzy calls him and by the time the crew found out and wanted to try calling him different names, the dog was kinda attached to the name Mutt so..

He's a rottweiler/lab mix (for now). For historical sake, if you want, we can just say a rottie mix. Labs weren't bred til the 1800s according to a very shallow google search.

Doodles!!

Comic!!

Notes!! Headcanons!! Whatever have you!!

Izzy didn't plan on asking Ed to keep him, or keeping him at all actually. Mutt followed him, and probably snuck aboard. We thought it'd be funny if Stede and Olu found him since they probably wouldn't know about the whole "no pets policy" thing Ed has. They bring him to Ed and are like "hey look" and Ed's like "wtf, get him off the ship" but somehow, Mutt runs off, finds Izzy and vavoom or something.

Loving the idea that Ed would be convinced that Mutt is a pure bred killer, which is why he allowed him to stay, only to watch him smother some of the crew with kisses and cuddle every fucking day

Izzy and Ed both are literally perfect for the "dad who said no then became the dog's best friend" thing just thought I'd point that out

Wee John or someone sewing him up a bandana so he "looks like a scary pirate dog" <3

Frenchie is excited bc dogs chase cats away, but Mutt just makes friends with other animals so..

The only one who's able to actually ignore the puppy eyes tactic is Buttons. It just feels correct. Izzy and Ed almost can. Almost.

Mutt has to wait outside Jackie's bar when they're there. One of the crew always stays with him.

Really liking the idea of "dog" being a negative term from Izzy whilst "mutt" is somehow more positive so the name wasn't bad in his eyes

Normally sleeps besides Izzy's bed, since Izzy was the first one he got attached to and kinda the whole point of this AU of sorts, but sometimes he sleeps with the crew or Stede. Izzy won't let him stay with Ed alone quite yet, juuuust in case.

Izzy lets him sleep on the end of his bed, most of the crew lets him sleep curled up with them, and Stede doesn't like to let him sleep in his bed for fear of fleas and dirt and etc etc, but also there's no way in hell that man can say no to puppy eyes (I mean look at s1 Ed)

Izzy (maybe partnered up with Stede) tries to train Mutt well, but unfortunately Frenchie and Roach like to "untrain" him in a way, or train him in ways that aren't so Izzy-approved.

Whilst Stede reads to the crew, Izzy reads/tells stories to Mutt.

Roach learning to make dog-healthy treats for him!

It takes a while for Mutt and Ed to warm up to each other but once they do, they're homies. Ed still treats him like he can be a beast but learns not to push anything. "Go fucking kill that crab over there and I'll have Roach make you something real special." "No? Alright fine. No treat for you. Just regular food..maybe a singular treat for your effort."

Lucius turning Mutt into a little model, Wee John and them making him different little clothes to wear for said modelling, and somehow they convince Izzy to sit long enough to be sketched with him once and probably only once. Fang likes to sit and hold him whilst being doodled.

Jim and Mutt having little chats after raids and stuff. "Captain says your a born killer. Same." Mutt can't answer but they know he's listening as much as he can.

That said, Mutt is 100% most of them's personal therapist. He doesn't understand human problems nor has the ability to give them advice, but it's nice to talk about things anyway. My friend is a massive Stede fan so ofc they had to offer up Stede crying but hugging Mutt so it ends up being a good kinda cry. And honestly yeah I dig it.

Izzy's 100% worried that the "no pets policy" is gonna suddenly come back and likes it best when Mutt stays with him bc of it. This is a feel good AU, obviously, but angstwise, Mutt could totally be used against Izzy and the crew.

Fang definitely teared up finding out Mutt was staying, but got attached immediately and 100% wants to help Izzy protect Mutt.

For some reason, Stede gives off "has a pretty bad dog hair allergy, would hug a dog anyway" vibes, so that's something we like to joke about. "Your face is a bit puffy there, Bonnet." "Oh yeah, I'm terribly allergic to canines." "You what?" "I said I'm terribl-" "Get your face out of his fucking fur you absolute twat!"

Mutt likes to roll in mud when on land and some of the crew probably think "why not join him" every single time. Who? Idk. But some of them.

Mutt joining in on the fuckeries. Somehow.

The Swede singing and Mutt howling with him.

Frenchie singing and Mutt howling with him.

Izzy yelling at someone and Mutt barking/growing with him.

For the most part Mutt is an absolute sweetheart, but Izzy is his dad, and he's a fast learner. 100% acts all vicious whenever Izzy's feeling aggressive (but it's mostly an act and he just kinda idly stands by Izzy like "yeah I'm tough shit too" then goes back to acting like a puppy the moment Izzy shuts up).

Okay that's all for now, good night, AND SEE YAH WHEN SEASON TWO AIRS!

#ofmd #izzy hands #our flag means death #ofmd izzy #ofmd stede #stede bonnet #ofmd au

[mrbutchdyke]

I posted 3,137 times in 2022

That's 1,507 more posts than 2021!

171 posts created (5%)

2,966 posts reblogged (95%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@ourflagmeanslgbtqia

@mhaccunoval

@weirdgirlcore

@eyeldritch

@caughtinnatrap

I tagged 1,991 of my posts in 2022

Only 37% of my posts had no tags

#ofmd - 965 posts

#our flag means death - 872 posts

#edward teach - 435 posts

#stede bonnet - 375 posts

#fanart - 299 posts

#blackbeard - 255 posts

#queue make stede happy - 206 posts

#ej talks - 107 posts

#ed teach - 76 posts

#blackstede - 71 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#hiiii charles (do u still go by yassen too??) i love ur writing and i love having u on my dash. glad our hyperfixations overlapped again :)

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

absolutely obsessed with the line "hey eddie, give us another song!" eddie. they called him eddie. they love him so much and they want him to hang out with them and sing a song with them and be their friend and they called him eddie. they have so much love for him that they gave him a nickname!!! that's what he wanted!!! that's all he wanted his whole life, and they were so so so willing to give it to him, so willing to be his friend and try to move on without stede, so willing to just enjoy being together for however long it lasted and still ed didn't even think he deserved it!! but they called him eddie!!!!

673 notes - Posted April 28, 2022

#4

I want Stede to go balls to the walls fucking crazy trying to woo Ed back. I want him to sweep Edward off his feet and recite poetry and gift him fancy clothes and books and little trinkets and flowers and sweets and special soap.

He wanted to marry for love, he's a romantic!!! Let him unleash that now that he knows what love is!! It's gonna make Stede soooo happy to show Ed how much he loves him and once Ed gets used to it he's gonna bask in it

1,186 notes - Posted March 27, 2022

#3

ofmd izzy hands is an extremely homophobic gay man. he's the masc4masc that is literally physically revolted by effeminate men. he's the personification of the "gay people I respect/don't respect" meme. he wrote "no fats no fems" on Pirate Grindr and means it. he thinks it's guys like lucius and black pete who make the rest of them look bad. he would love corporate pride parades

3,112 notes - Posted March 22, 2022

#2

The crew of the revenge cares about each other so so much. Calico Jack kills Karl and everyone freezes in their tracks. Their faces all fall. They're devastated for Buttons. One of them presumably runs to get Stede, unless he noticed the cease in activity and ran out to see for himself what happened. Stede sees Buttons holding Karl and banishes Jack from his ship immediately, no hesitation. Stede can be as uncomfortable as Jack wants to make him. The man pissed on his shoes and he still thought that it was worth it to have him around if it made Ed happy! But as soon as he sees what Jack has done to his crew he's done. Get off my ship he says! Now!

3,696 notes - Posted March 27, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

jim jimenez is the most character ever. they're so complex. they were raised by a vengeful nun. their favorite color is teal because that's the color of olu's earring. they kept lucius in a trunk for like two days. they threw a knife at some english guy because he was racist to frenchie and olu. they think stede is the worst pirate captain in history. they loved performing their disemboweling skit during the fuckery. they told stede that killing stays with you forever. they grabbed a corpse's face and threatened to kill it again. they're arguably the most competent crew member on the revenge. they confronted spanish jackie alone and without a plan c. they have a diary. they're nonbinary. they're catholic? they're gay. they're my best friend

11,640 notes - Posted April 18, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #shoutout to my beloved pacrim mutuals theo and charles for making my tumblr wrapped this year

[wastedwastelandme]

Given how hilariously popular this post has gotten, I feel like I should make this addendum to it in terms of “competency” on the crew and how it applies to them. The way I see it, nearly every member has a very specific skill/area that they are adept at handling with little else outside of that.

Jim’s area is of course that they are hands down the best fighter on and off the ship... and kind of not caring about anything else. They only give off the aura of being better at handling and thinking of things than the others because they’re always next to Oluwande, who gives off enough reasonable energy for two people.

Oluwande’s area is that he is the one with common sense, a crowning achievement amongst this crew. At basically all times if you want an opinion that reasonable people would have, he is the one to go to.

Frenchie has his music skills of course, but might be dismissed skill-wise until he’s dealing with high society. He thrives in this environment, knowing just what to say and do to con all those uppity rich folks out of every cent they have. If you need a man for a scheme, this is your guy.

Roach has the double billing of ship’s cook and doctor. It is inconclusive how adept he is at either job (”knives are knives, meat’s meat”) but the crew isn’t dead and he worked with an order of a 40-orange glaze, so he gets a pass.

Lucius has probably the most extensive skillset out of the whole crew, his literacy combined with his pickpocket experience and enough street smarts to get out of both work and being killed by Jim twice. There are also times where he gets to share the common sense badge with Olu and can give just the right advice for the moment, though he oscillates between being able to quickly think his way out of situations and having thoughts overrun by panic, so your mileage may vary.

Buttons is the ship guy. He can tell you anything you need to know to keep the ship sailing smoothly and the crew occupied. He also can talk to seagulls and is probably a witch, which would actually make his behaviour seem more reasonable than the rest, so good for him.

Wee John and Black Pete fall into the category of crew ‘generally’ without specific skillsets, but pretty much can pick up and do any job needed on the ship with no visible deficiency (though I would be willing to count whittling for Black Pete and to put Wee John in my noted crewmembers who have sewing experience list with Frenchie and Roach). The Swede would fall into this category except that he busted out his excellent singing voice out of nowhere, so he gets to notch that into his skill column.

All of this is to say, basically each member gets to be competent at at least one thing, and this does not invalidate the fact that they are all still equally dumb as hell <3 

#our flag means death #I felt like I made it too vague calling Jim competent #and Frenchie too #they can certainly SEEM more competent than the rest I can give them that #but I just think this is funnier #my post

[cononeillbreastingboobily]

Lucius: they haven't seen each other because of the night shift. They just need to bone.

Olu: what?! Gross, Lucius, those are our dads!

Lucius: O_O

Olu: I mean, that's not what I think! Captain dad is just my boss!

Lucius: Wow.

Olu: Nevermind, I'm teaching father Spanish!

Lucius:...

Olu: Whatever, Lucius 😭😭😭

#idk #i just think it would be hilarious #our flag means death #ofmd #lmaooo #oluwande boodhari #lucius spriggs #brooklyn 99 #b99 #BONE??? #ofmd incorrect quotes #i think that out of all crew members Olu and Lucius are the most like... outwardly loyal? towards Stede #that is‚ up until ep 9 when everyone else chimed in to save his skin #buuut yeah #i can honestly picture it in their voices

[elapsed-spiral]

OFMD fics (so far)

Time to update my fic list again³, check it out under the cut.

This list is getting out of control so I've added some handy symbols: 🎧 = podfic available 💜 = personal favourite ⭐ = fics you may have heard about? Maybe? I don't know, I don't have a sense for this stuff.

Cool collaboration(s) you should read immediately:

🎧💜Work Experience: what if Ed went to meet Stede when the Revenge ran aground? And what if Ed became a member of Stede’s crew? And what if things kept escalating and… Canon AU. Mature. Co-written with Shearwater.

Really no excuse for how stupid these ones are:

Watch Out, Here I Come: what if Stede had been intentionally seducing Ed? Teen

Once More, With Feeling: what if Frenchie just fixed the season 1 finale fiasco because he’s the most capable guy on the ship? Teen

Talent Show: what if Ed was crass about his sexual preferences? Explicit

Capsize on Your Thighs: what if Ed rebounded onto Calico Jack at the end of season 1? Ed/CJ and Ed/Stede (but Ed/Stede is endgame, natch). Explicit

🎧💜Your Feedback is Important to Us: what if Stede started holding open cabin hours to allow the crew to air their grievances (but was also very repressed and horny over Ed)? Explicit

Oh no Ed’s working through gender/class stuff (but make it funny):

Finery: Ed gets to wear a dress, Stede spontaneously combusts. Explicit

Tell More Tales: Stede isn’t the only writer aboard the Revenge. Explicit

🎧💜Lovers and Madmen: Ed is hellbent on marrying Stede. Explicit

AUs no-one asked for:

Novel/novella length

🎧💜Restructuring: modern AU where Stede loses his fortune before meeting Ed, but Ed’s still got more money than you can shake a fucking stick at. Only problem is, Stede lies and says he’s wealthy and Ed lies and says he isn’t. Like the show, it’s a romcom about trauma. Explicit 🎧💜⭐Baddy Zaddy: Bridget Jones’s Diary style, former porn star turned sex shop owner!Ed/still unfortunately landed gentry!Stede. Novel length modern AU. Explicit

💜⭐Prize Every Time: You’ve Got Mail-y secret pen pals but also business rivals. Novel length modern AU. Explicit

Conflict of Interest: lawyer!Stede/businessman!Ed (read: gangster). Modern AU. Explicit

Shorter uns

Intergalactic Tango: Space Waltz AU. Mature

🎧💜Trade Descriptions Act: bailiff!Ed/estate agent!Stede. Identity theft but make it meet cute. Modern AU. Teen

Your Favourite Song: locksmith!Ed/museum curator!Stede. Kinktober fill that somehow isn’t E rated. Modern AU. Teen

⭐Draft Letter to Restaurant Downstairs: Google Docs AU with a (slightly) interactive element. Modern SMAU. Teen

Blind Date: Stede and Jeffrey Fettering go on a blind date at Ed’s restaurant. I think you know where this is going. Modern AU. Explicit

Different Dimension: ficlet that crams four and a bit AUs into 850 words. Modern AU. Teen

Stuck Still: British holiday resort AU feat. events manager!Stede and bartender turned fairy!Ed (it makes sense in the story I swear). Modern AU. Explicit

💜On the Job: “kidnapping” meet cute (but not actually. Again, I swear it makes sense in the story I swear). Modern AU. Explicit

Starring Jason Statham: another weird meet cute, courtesy of Jack and the Fast and Furious franchise. Stede/Jack, Ed/Jack and Ed/Stede (Ed/Stede is once again end game). Modern AU. Teen

West Ham Is for Lovers: Lucius has a new job. It's going fine. Completely, totally fine. A meet cute fic about meet cutes. Ed/Stede but also Lucius/Pete, Lucius/Fang, Lucius/Izzy and Lucius/Olu/Jim. Modern AU. Teen 💜Conventional: back in the 00s, Ed was in a very famous movie franchise. Nowadays, he does the convention circuit. Modern AU. Explicit 🎧💜Proud: Ed attends Pride to get free mum hugs, Stede attends Pride to give free dad hugs. Modern AU. Teen KrakenAir: Stede and the crew are heading to Benidorm to celebrate Stede coming out. That is, if Stede’s all expenses spared KrakenAir flight ever departs. Modern SMAU. Teen Very Poor, Becoming Good: Aspiring Gentleman Backpacker Stede Bonnet is adventure bound when he meets fellow traveller Ed Teach at an empty hostel. Now if they could just find the owner… Modern AU. Explicit

Stolen by the Gentleman Thief: Ed is a lonely gay guy in his late forties whose favourite book is historical softcore porn. Luckily, there's a weird meet cute about to happen. Modern AU. Explicit

Oh no there’s been a containment breach (aka non-Blackbonnet fics):

💜We Do What We Like (and We Like What We Do): A brief history of Ed and Jack. Explicit (Ed/CJ)

Fealty: Stede and Izzy make one another even more miserable. Mature (Stede/Izzy)

💜Contra Proferentem: Ed is a high powered lawyer and Professor of Law at the University of Cambridge. Lucius is not a high powered lawyer but he is a lecturer of English Lit at the University of Cambridge. Stede own a very nice cafe. Explicit (platonic Ed/Lucius, Ed/Stede, no cheating involved)

#ofmd fanfic #ofmd fic #my ofmd fics #btw if anyone wants to do podfics or anything else related to my fics please have at it #I mean let me know so I can be very grateful at you but otherwise go for it