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linksthoughtbrambles · 2 years

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So. Much. Fun!

Part 55 of Link's Thought Brambles

Why are we going this way?

I mean, I can guess why we’re going this way considering she asked if I was hungry.

But it’s not what I expected.

Last time I was in the mess, I was a nervous wreck. I couldn’t even look into the room! Eyes on the wall or Zelda’s hair the whole time. And it’s not like I’ve magically made up with all these people. Realistically, I wasn’t friends with them anyway.

…That’s… not true, is it? Greggan’s my friend. Or… something? He tries to help me. A lot. And not just with the usual training stuff. He’s tried to help me with things I get stuck on in my head.

Jeralt tries to help, too.

You know what? I think Turro might be my friend. Maybe.

Plynne? Leeza?

Myrri. Myrri is definitely my friend.

That’s… still not a lot.

We’re almost there. I…

“Link? Oh…”

I know. I know- “I know I should be able to get over this…”

“Is your apprehension still as it was… after the melee?”

Yeah. Yeah, I think it is.

Her hand. An offering.

“I’m with you.”

It’s amazing. After our exhaustingly incredible morning… I shouldn’t be this thrilled to feel her fingers slide against my palm. Outlining all my little lines and callouses. Not like hers… so smooth. It won’t be, soon. Not once she starts a training regimen.

“Please come with me, Link?”

“Oh, I will… I just…” …in through the nose… “Phooooo.”

Crinkly-eyed Princess. Guess my deep-breathing’s cute.

“Better?”

“Tiny bit.” Okay. Last fifty feet, if that is in fact where she’s going… and it is, isn’t it? It seems really really loud, even for the mess. What's making the clinking sound?

WOW!

“WOOOOOOO!”

“HE’S HERE!” “HEAR, HEAR!”

TOTAL UPROAR it’s packed, PACKED with PEOPLE!

What-

Horns?! They have horn players in here? That’s a new song, that’s new, that-

Wait, maybe I HAVE heard that somewhere before- “UPH!”

“LINK!”

“…Chee!” SISTER HUG SISTER HUG SISTER HUG “Chee, are you alright?”

“ME?! You’re backwards, Link! I’m not the one who had an arrow in their lung!”

“Yeah, but I wasn't blaming myself for it.“

"I'll get over it a lot better than you would've. And I'll definitely be taking those lessons."

Wow. "Good. Good! We'll set you up."

“Sweetheart?”

Mom. Big hug. Not big enough, Link. Make it HUGE. “Mom. I’m so sorry for what you had to go through, I’m so-“

“Never mind what I went through. My son is alive. I’ll take that gladly and give thanks every single day for as long as I live.”

A kiss on my forehead. And… a little hesitation? And a funny smile? And OH this is your mom, Link, she knows she always KNOWS and she just glanced at Zelda and that smile got BIGGER and-

“My dear… you had a very nice morning, didn’t you?”

“Uh… well… y- yeah….”

Another kiss. “Good. You deserve all the happiness you can get.”

“You… won’t tell father, will you?”

“I will not—but promise me something.”

“Um. Okay.”

“Tell him yourself. Pick up a pen and write to him. Do it soon. He loves you, Link. I guarantee he’s wondering what’s happening with you, especially if news of the sword has reached him. He’ll likely hear of the melee soon if he hasn’t already, and then he’ll hear of the festival. He’ll be beside himself.”

“He… he really doesn’t like me to brag.”

“Telling the truth is not bragging. There’s a difference between saying, ‘I can defeat every knight in this castle,’ and ‘I defeated eighty knights in this castle at once.’ One of them is a boast. The other is what happened. Tell him, Link. And tell him of the Princess. He… will be happy for you.”

Will he? Have I ever seen him be happy for me? I’ve seen him proud of what I could do…

“Well, I’m hardly the only person who wants to speak with you, Link. I’ll move aside for now.”

“Mom, later let’s-“

“Tell me later. You’ve a line!”

I don’t think I can call that a line. It’s a very loud, very boisterous, and possibly somewhat inebriated throng. The sound is so much at least it’s unlikely people’ll hear all my conversations.

Mipha inching toward me. She- it’s still hard to read her face. But her hands are at her sides, not wringing at her stomach.

“I’m so glad you’re well, Link. I’m sorry it took so long.”

“There’s no reason for you to be sorry, Mipha. Thank you… thank you so much.” A warm hug for you. Across your shoulders.

“Oh- oh, Link.”

Her hands curled up over my shoulders. She’s… surprisingly not tense.

“I will always heal you. Please know that.”

“And I hope you know that’s not what this hug is for. You’re one of my favorite people in the entire world, you know that? It’s a short list. Zelda… Mom and Chee… Bazz, and you.”

“Oh, what of Rivan and Gaddison?”

“Yeah, they’re up there, too, but they’re not as fun as you are.”

“Oh- hehe, you’re joking.”

“Eh, only a little. Rivan gave me that wedgie when I was seven, and I never really got over it.”

“That was an accident!”

“It still makes me want to cross my legs when I’m near a waterfall.”

“And what of poor Gaddison?”

“She’s fun, but she’s a lot younger than us-“

“OH!”

“Wh-what?”

“You’ve entirely forgotten Kodah!”

“Ohhh, no I haven’t. There’s a STORY, there.”

“Oh? What story?”

“Kid!”

SHOULDER-clap!

“You have some Goddess-damned constitution to live through something like that. Both lungs? You should’ve been dead in under an hour.”

Guess I’ll have to tell the Kodah story later. “Hi, Greggan.” Oh- his arm- avoid the sling, Link-

“Ha! …Sorry I didn’t see that bastard for what he was earlier.”

?? His chin’s working. That’s a swallow. No, no, he doesn't think it's his fault, does he? “None of us did. I mean… we all knew he WAS a bastard, but…”

“It hid him. No more of that s@#$. Jeralt and I had a talk. We sent Blagmeer packing. Told him he could head to a remote outpost, or he could be discharged. He chose discharge… fine with me. That f%#$er can go be a mercenary if he wants to draw the blood of his own kind.”

Wow…

“We’re having that other bastard’s bow mounted, blood and all. It’s for your wall, Princess, if you want it. If not, we’ll hang it in here as a warning along with the other blasted thing.”

“This hall is the correct place, Sir Greggan. A warning and a reminder… not a trophy.”

“As you say, Princess.”

The bow. “Was there anything odd about the bow?”

“Damn right there was. How’d you know?”

“My sword told me.”

“Ha. Well, don’t ask me to explain it, but it wasn’t the bow he had in his hands at the tournament. Don’t know how he squirreled away something that big. Designed to make firing two arrows easy. Double-curved and spikes for close combat. I’m told it hails from the desert.”

“…The Yiga clan?”

“Seems like.”

“Not just SEEMS like. Those weapons are definitely Yiga make… glad you’re alright, Linky.”

“Thanks, Purah.”

“Heeeeee LI-I-I-IVES- OH YEAH!”

Aaaaand that would be Robbie.

“Do you HAVE to try and steal the stage everywhere we go? This is DEFINITELY Linky’s moment, not yours.”

“Oh YEAAAAAAH! HORNS!”

And there they go again. Surprised they listened to him, actually-

Oh, they didn’t. There’s Zuho. His hand’s up.

And he’s reaching a hand toward me.

He… wants to shake my hand?

So serious. His mouth a completely flat line. His eyes, though. Full of something I can’t quite name.

Handshake… okay-

“I owe you a debt that cannot be repaid, Sir Link.”

Y-you-?

“For saving her.”

Oh.

Of course.

Firm up that handshake, Link.

“You don’t owe me anything, Zuho. I-“

“I do. All I have to give is my music… and I will give it. Count on that.”

I don’t know what to say to that…

And he’s back into the crowd.

“Sir Link-“ “Let the man breathe, maybe-“ “He’s gotta be-“ “Awkward-“

“LADIES AND GENTLEMEN – KNIGHTS – SOLDIERS – COOKS – MAIDS – STABLEHANDS – FRIENDS – ALL!”

The king. He’s up on a tabletop.

“TODAY IS A DAY TO CELEBRATE. SIR LINK – THE HERO OF HYRULE – LIVES!”

UP. ROAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Zelda’s hand slipping into mine. A shoulder-squeeze from Greggan. He’s smiling at me.

“IF THERE WAS EVER A SIGN… THAT HE WAS MADE TO FIGHT THE CALAMITY ITSELF… IT IS HIS SURVIVAL AGAINST SUCH OVERWHELMING ODDS!”

So loud! Ears ringing!

“HIS WILLINGNESS TO STRIKE AT HIS ENEMY… EVEN AT DEATH’S DOOR!”

LOUDer!

“AND IF THERE WAS EVER A SIGN… THAT MY DAUGHTER WAS MEANT TO FIGHT AT HIS SIDE… IT IS HER DEADLY PRECISION… THAT STRUCK HER ATTACKER DOWN!”

WOW.

“HER EXTRAORDINARY STRENGTH… THAT HELD THE BLADE AT SIR LINK’S THROAT BACK… AND HER TRULY OUTSTANDING INTELLIGENCE… WHICH PRESERVED HIS LIFE!”

He’s… a good politician. These people were already excited but now they’re RILED-

“RAISE YOUR TANKARDS! AH- SOMEONE GET OUR GUESTS OF HONOR A DRINK!”

A rumbling crowd-laugh and- wow- beer for each of us. At what, ten o’clock in the morning? Maybe eleven? I didn’t even think to ask, but these people started REALLY early.

“MUCH BETTER. EVERYONE… RAISE YOUR TANKARDS! TO LINK, THE HERO OF HYRULE, AND TO PRINCESS ZELDA!”

I’ve never been much on beer, but I’ll drink to that.

And apparently, so will she. With a smile over her tankard that’ll plague me until next time we’re alone.

Oh, we're getting herded. Guess we’re sitting over there where the king’s stomping back down.

My Goddess, Jeralt! “Your eye!”

“A small price to pay for your life, Link.”

I almost hadn’t realized—all those clanging sounds right after the arrow struck. That was at least partly Jeralt. I remember blood spraying. My Goddess, I don’t think he even screamed. I would have…

No wonder he was out of the fight for a bit. That’s when… that’s when Zelda held Vayden back.

I have questions about that. Many questions. How was he that strong? Unnaturally fast, too, like me. How did he disappear and reappear above us?

I have no experience with this Yiga clan, master. The Sheikah, however, have long been wielders of magic. It’s not unreasonable to surmise the Yiga have retained the magic while forsaking its original purpose.

So, it’s not just the ability to hide weapons, then. They can strengthen themselves. Make themselves faster?

And apparently teleport, master.

Tell a… port?

T-e-l-e-p-o-r-t. Teleport. Verb. To travel from one location to another without physically passing through the space between. Or at least, not in one’s physical form.

“Link? Are you alright?”

“Sorry, Jeralt. I was talking to the sword- to Fi.”

Your usage of my proper name is appreciated, master.

“Fi?”

“It’s her name. Her name is Fi.”

Everyone who heard that has fish-face. Um.

“SHE?” “It has a name?!” “It’s actually TALKING?!” “What’s it sound like?!” “It’s a woman?!”

“Woah- uh. Yeah, she says she’s a she, so… I guess so. She… sounds like a she, too. Sort of. I don’t really hear her, exactly? It’s… It’s in my head. And yeah, she told me her name is Fi. Gets irritated with me if I don’t use it.”

“She gets irritated?!”

“Heh. Yeah. Hi, Turro.”

“Hi. Wow.”

Can’t tell where his arrow hit him. Not a limb. Nothing bandaged there.

Master?

“Yeah, Fi?” Heh. You show-off. You figured they’d gasp if you talked to her out-loud. Pretty fun, though…

My name is distinct from the name of the sword I inhabit. I’ve noticed you refer to it as the Sword that Seals the Darkness, which is an accurate name. There is, however, an older name, and yet another that is even older still. You appear to be unaware of both.

“Really?”

Yes. The sword you wield has been known as the Master Sword.

“The Master Sword?”

Yes. It refers in part to its function and in part to you, master.

“Uh… okay. I don’t get it.”

You are my master. This is my master’s sword.

Oh… yeah, okay, duh-

This sword is also a master key. It locks… and unlocks… many doors.

“Alright. So, it’s the Master Sword. What about the other name you mentioned?”

Before you wielded it, this sword belonged to the Goddess Hylia herself. In those times, it was known as the Goddess Sword.

“I guess that makes sense.”

“…You wanna summarize that for us, Link? We, ahha… can’t hear her.”

“Sorry, Turro. She said the sword itself is called the Master Sword, but it used to be called the Goddess Sword when Hylia used to wield it.”

“HYLIA?!” “Holy S@#$, Link!” “Are you serious?”

“That’s what she said.”

“Well, Sir Link.”

“Yes, sire?”

“Hmph. First of all… I am glad to see you so well.”

“Thank you, sire.”

“However, I cannot help but wonder why you’ve never mentioned this Fi before.”

“I couldn’t hear her before.”

“Indeed? When did this begin?”

“…When I got shot.”

“…Huh.”

“I don’t really understand it either, sire. Fi said I wasn’t aligned. Or… wait, no that’s not quite it. She said I had never been more out of alignment than I was before that.”

“Out of alignment.”

“Yes, sire.”

“Gentlemen?”

“Princess?” “Yes, Princess-“

“And father, if you’ll pardon me-“

“Of course.”

“I feel I must remind you that Sir Link is quite likely ravenous. Lady Mipha was quite clear regarding her magic’s effect on appetite.”

“Ah, yes. Come, lad. This seat’s yours.”

Never thought I’d be sitting on one of these benches next to Zelda. …Here I am. Greggan on my other side. That feels right. And the king across from us. Jeralt and Turro. Cahz and Eberoy must be on king-flanking duty, but-

“Sir Link.”

Don’t gulp. “Sir Merendith.”

“…Sorry about your neck.”

“My neck?”

“At the melee. I overdid it. I’m apologizing.”

“Oh. Thanks. It’s- alright.”

“I don’t like to lose.”

“Me either.”

“Hph. Is that why you sat on my head?”

“Well… no. That wasn’t about me.” Can’t help finding Zelda’s eyes. Can’t help the smile once I see them. She’s right. This awkward-feeling, lopsided, left-corner -only smile is just for her.

She has a tiny, nearly-invisible secret smile for me, too. Barely perceptible. A slight lift on both sides and minute softening around her eyes. Sometimes... I think I see her more clearly than anyone else.

“…For a lot of us, it WAS about you, Sir Link. I’m just glad I was there to make up for it when those bastards attacked. Wish my sword had found Vayden’s head sooner.”

“We all, I think, wish many things, Sir Merendith—but we can’t change the past. All we can do is make the future the best one we can.”

“Yes, sire.”

And everyone’s raising their tankards to that. The king… I have a lot to learn from him. He’s good with words.

Wait, aren’t I supposed to be good with words?

He’s… better at knowing how his words matter than I am.

“Eggs?”

“Oh- sure—thank you, Princess.” OhhhOHH that’s a lot of eggs-

“Hmm. Don’t give me that look. You and I both know you could eat this entire platter.”

True, but there’d be none for anyone else!

“Ha! Let us take that as the signal to dig in.”

‘Yes, sire!” “Hear, hear, sire!” “Thank-you, sire.” “Indeed, father.”

Wow, a few forkfuls in and my stomach is trying to jump up my throat for more- oooh, Zelda has the toast plate sooooo much butter on those yum yum- oh? She’s… putting her eggs on a slice… and then putting another slice on top… now she’s putting MORE eggs on that and another slice on the top and she’s picking it up…

And flashing her eyebrows at me over it.

And THAT is her amused half-smile. Just like the last time we had breakfast down here.

Alright, Princess. Two can play at that game.

I’m not sure what game it is, but I’m playing anyway!

Toast on plate, check. Eggs on first slice, check. Second slice on those, check. More eggs on that, check. Third slice on top, check.

MORE EGGS on slice three! CHECK!

OoOOoh look at your scandalized-Princess-face!

“Sir Link. Is that a challenge?”

Oh CRAP, Link! The appropriate response to that is, ‘It’s a promise.’ That’s what we’ve been saying. Right? S@#$, s@#$, s@#$, it doesn’t FIT here! AHHH! What am I going to do? I mean, it’s stupid to imply, ‘I promise I can eat more eggs than you’ or ‘I promise I can fit a lot in my mouth’ because frankly if one of us were to be the one to imply that and it to have some kind of sexy meaning it would have to be her, and for the love of Hylia don’t think the word sexy while the king is sitting across from you, he’ll know he’ll know he’ll know and I am once more taking MUCH too long to answer and I have spooked-face don’t I?

“Hmm.”

Awwww. I took too long.

“Are you attempting to work out how the answer to my question could possibly be ‘It’s a promise?’”

Oh, THANK YOU for your smart-remembering-brains! “Yeah.”

Her smile just… got way softer. It's the chin-tilting thing.

“And I didn’t even need the slate.”

Oh. Oh- “No. You didn’t.”

“…Well. Do you intend to complete your impressive sandwich, sir?”

“I do.”

“Let’s see it, then.”

…Okay. One last slice of toast on top.

Phew. It’s tall, but I can still get my hands around it.

“… Can you successfully encompass all four slices at once?”

Ha. This is NOTHING. You’re looking at the guy who downs whole kabobs in a single bite! And I don’t even stab the back of my throat with the skewer! Here I go.

“O-oh.”

Yeah. I don’t really know how it works, either.

“How did you do that?!”

Wow. She’s legitimately surprised. It’s not like she’s never seen me eat. “Um. I like food?”

“…Well… I suppose starting on a corner as you did would maximize the amount of volume you could take in before the width of your mouth would prevent further insertion.”

…I don’t know why, but that sounded REALLY dirty.

It wasn’t.

But…

Don’t look at anyone else, Link. The INSTANT you make eye-contact with said someone, regardless of who, they know that you know and you have in fact confirmed its nebulous inappropriateness by doing so.

Clinical, that’s the word. It was very clinical.

‘Insertion.’ Um-

“Of course, the additional compression of the sandwich to force as much in as quickly as possible also contributed.”

If I agree with her will it seem like forcing as much in as possible is in fact not at all suggestive? “…Of course!”

“The corner-angle increased that technique’s effectiveness. It limited the amount lost against the outside of your mouth.”

She… she’s still talking about the sandwich, right?

Of course, she is. There’s no corner angle with… well, with any of my parts. Or hers.

Stop reading so much into things, Link!

And stop watching her as she lifts her own sandwich to her mouth and mimics my eating-style. And holy f@#$ if she did that to my parts I might just die right then and there and OH!

OH!

OH S#$%, LINK!!!

Is THIS why people freak out when I eat?!?!?!?!! Because THIS IS HOW I EAT!!!!! And apparently, I also gaze lovingly at my food, so much so that it can easily be misinterpreted as 100% full-force totally unguarded lust!!!!

DO PEOPLE THINK I’M FLIRTING WITH THEM WHEN I EAT?!?!?!??!??!??!?!?!??!

No. NOOOO. No. NO. NO! I LIKE eating. And I LIKE to eat fast. And I LIKE to eat a lot of food at once. I don’t want to have to live as some kind of food-hermit, unable to eat the way I like unless I hide myself in a closet somewhere with a platter full of- of- forbiddenly-large portions to stuff in my face with increasingly-large helpings of shame! I do NOT want to feel shame when I eat! I-

“Kid?”

“Yes?!”

“Eat your Goddess-damned sandwich.”

“Yes.”

Greggan’s right. He’s right. Just eat. It’s weirder to stare at the Princess than it is for me to put bread and eggs in my mouth. Really weird. How long was I watching her chew?

I have to figure this out, though. I have to. Maybe I can…

Maybe I can…

Oh.

Huh.

This celebration. It’s for me, isn’t it?

Because they’re glad I’m not dead.

It’s for Zelda, too. But she wasn’t the one with the arrow in her.

They… are glad I’m here.

I could ask.

I could just ask.

Just like I started talking to Zelda. I could start talking to them, too.

I outrank them. Will that make it weird?

Link… it’s already weird. What does it matter, really?

Okay, I’m going to do this.

I’m going to ask.

I really really am. “Um…”

Aaaaand they’re all looking at me.

My voice was higher than normal, wasn’t it?

Well, too bad. Too late now. I have to say something.

“Why… why….”

Ohhhh, look at all their faces turned this way. Some chewing. Some not. All watching me.

“I just… was wondering… why…” and the chewing is slowing now, get it out, get it out, Link! “Why people give me funny looks when I eat.”

“HA!” “It ain’t natural!” “Have you SEEN yourself?” “It’s like a Goddess-damned freak-show!”

Ohhh wow, I hear it they’re passing the question down the whole length of the table, it’ll be circling the whole room-

“BECAUSE IT’S HOT!”

Oh my Gooooooooooodess… THAT was a guy… crap in a hand-basket do I look and see if it’s that guy who was eyeing me a lot in the barracks?

Zelda’s chuckling.

And there are her lips at my ear. Not in a sexy way. In an I-need-to-whisper-seriously way.

“He’s right.”

Ohhhh. I’m so doomed, aren’t I? Can I get a look at the king’s face- okay, at least he’s smiling. No lockup-with-stalnox-bones likely in near future. Maybe if he found out what I did to his daughter this morning-

No. No, she said he gave permission. Though I doubt he had so many varieties of insertion in mind.

Oh. There’s that word again.

“BECAUSE HOW CAN SOMEONE SO SMALL TAKE IN THINGS SO BIG?”

Uuuugh. I’ve made a mistake. A terrible-

“BECAUSE THERE’S NO WAY YOU CAN FIT IT ALL IN THAT TINY BODY, WHERE DOES IT ALL GO?”

Oh Goddess, it’s picking up speed-

“BECAUSE YOU EAT MORE THAN CRINNO!”

“BECAUSE YOU EAT SO FAST-“ “IT’S JUST NOT POSSIBLE!”

“THE RATE’S INSANE!”

“TO MAKE YOU SAVE SOME FOR THE REST OF US!”

Aaaaand now they’re all laughing at that one…

Well, at least none of them said-

“BECAUSE YOU LOOK LIKE YOU’RE PROPASITIONING SOMEONE!”

Oh NO!

“YEAH!” “AMIRIGHT?!” “BIGGEST ONE OF ALL, THAT ONE!” “HOLY F@#$ YEAH!” “DON’T LOOK LINK IN THE EYE WHEN HE EATS, LADIES!”

OhmyGoddessohmyGoddessohmyGoddessit’smyownfaultreallymyowni’mjuststupidandturningsoREHHHHHHHHHHHHHHD-

“My extraordinary knight.”

“Y-yes, Princess?”

“…They’re absolutely right about that.”

“Uuuuuugh.” I hear the king laughing, guess it’s good he has a sense of humor, better that than not, but it’s still agonizing. I could easily see a sterner king sticking ‘because it’s hot’ guy in lockup for a few days.

“However, I feel compelled to point out that while the act of taking food in does have a somewhat risqué appearance, while chewing you instead reflect a rather fortunate squirrel whose cheeks are plump with many nuts.”

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

“AH HAHAHAHAHA!!!” “PFFFFFFFFF-“ “Holy sweet Hyla-“ “Haha MANY nuts!” “SO MANY NUTS!”

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

“Oh dear. What have I said?”

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

“What- OH!”

OOOOOOOOOOOO

“OH goodness!”

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

“Link, I apologize sincerely!”

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

“I had entirely forgotten our discussion of nuts!”

OOOOOOOO- OH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“HA! You’ve discussed this, have you?”

NO!!!!!!!! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“Yes, father.”

AH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“Link informed me that nuts was another word for- ah. Well…”

Oh S@#$!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO NO DON’T TELL THE KING!!!

“Ah- yes, daughter, I am, in fact, familiar with the term.”

Of course he is of course he is why wouldn’t he be-

“I must admit my curiosity at how it came up.”

No, please, please don’t be curious-

“I believe I had reminded Link not to forget his nuts.”

You know what, I’m dead, Mipha didn’t heal me, this is my punishment-

“AHHH HAHAHAHA-“ “Oh, Link, you are SCREWED.” “Haha, Can’t forget THOSE!”

I’m not sure what for, but-

“And he found my statement extremely amusing.”

I’m sure there’s something.

“I was unaware of the context and requested explanation.”

Help.

“I see. And Sir Link. You explained its meaning?”

“Yes, sire.” Why did that sound funny? Oh, because my face is in my hands, that’s why.

“Ahhh. I’m surprised at you, Zelda. Your memory is usually impeccable.”

“Indeed. The squirrel analogy was quite natural and not at all meant to sustain your discomfort, Link. I am sorry.”

“I know, Princess. Don’t worry about it.”

“Hah. Please, Sir Link—remove your hands and continue eating. The table—and the room—are teasing you rather mercilessly, but I hope It is clear that this time, it is friendly teasing.”

…It is, isn’t it?

No threats of melees here.

“Ah ha. Good. Eat.”

Right. Right.

This is a record, I think. Longest time I’ve ever taken to finish a sandwich.

Ohhh, no, wait. That’s not true. There’s an unbeatably long one. Because it’s the one and only sandwich I’ll never finish. That time when I was nine and we caught that stomach bug. I took one bite of that tomato and cheese sandwich and barfed.

The only sandwich I’ve never finished.

No new record. There never can be!

“You so easily become lost to thought.”

“Sorry, Princess.”

“Don’t be sorry, Link. I love that about you. Just as I love everything else.”

It’s that shy smile with the tilted chin, and her lips moving a little like she’s not quite sure if she wants to say something else. The table around us went real quiet, though people are still chewing.

Be brave, Link. You know they know. With the ceremony and the ball… and she was going to drag you into the gazebo in full view of LOTS of guards after the festival. Hold your hand open on the tabletop. See if she’ll-

She did.

And suddenly, that smile doesn't seem so shy anymore.

“I hope all you muck-spouts who joined the melee are paying attention.”

“Yeah, Greggan. I apologize again, Sir Link. And to you, Princess.”

“Merendith wasn’t the only one.”

Woah. Greggan’s pointedly leaning back to glare at Cahz and Eberoy.

“Sir Link already has my apologies. And my loyalty.”

“Alright, Eberoy… Cahz?”

“…I apologize for being a muck-spout, sir.”

“A what, Cahz?”

“Ahem. I AM A RUDDY MUCK-SPOUT, SIR! I apologize.”

“Damn straight.”

“Jeralt?”

“Yes, Merendith?”

“What do you mean, yes? You were there, too.”

“Ha—doesn’t count. He was babysitting the rest of you.”

“What?!”

“You didn’t know?”

“…No way. I call bulls@#$. You didn’t stop Garai.”

“I should’ve. Slow to get up, slow to act. One more… one more hit and I would’ve. But if I had, there’d have been consequences. Link had to at least make it to me on his own or it wouldn’t be a clear enough victory, right? Rules of championship. I do have to admit, though, I didn’t think you’d do it, Link. Thought you might get yourself killed trying.”

Yeah. I almost did.

“S@$%, Jeralt. Why didn’t you tell us not to do it?”

“…You mean like how I told you not to trail Link in the hallway and on the grounds?”

“…W-“

“You didn’t listen then. Why would you have listened in the yard?”

“…S#$@.”

“Why… wouldn’t you have listened to Jeralt?”

“Heh. Because, kid… they were too busy listening to your father. Right?”

…That’s… a lot of grimacy-looks being exchanged there.

“…He did say to watch him.”

“To look after him, Cahz, not treat him like a spy.”

Jeralt’s right, but still...

“Ehhh. Let’s be clear on this. We’re talking about Link’s father, here, and he’s being awfully quiet. Should tell you a few things, shouldn’t it?”

…Greggan notices an awful lot.

“Kid, your father never meant for these idiots to kick your ass in a melee over some rumor-mongering. I don’t think he wanted them tailing you, either. The issue is, with Sir Lyle, it can be Goddess-damned difficult to tell what he means.”

Yeah. Yeah, that’s true.

“He’s great with all things soldier. Terrible with all things people. It’s as simple as that. YOU all should know better. Get some bloody clarification from him when things don’t make sense. And listen to Jeralt. He has more sense than the rest of you. Ah- if you agree, sire.”

“If I didn’t agree, Sir Greggan, I’d have interrupted you.”

“…Is no one going to mention the other thing?”

Uh oh. I can guess what Turro means, but the king’s here. Does he-

“Ahh. Let’s leave that one to lie, shall we, Sir Turro? Sir Lyle was clearly in error.”

“…Yes, sire. It’s just- I thought it was odd that he even said anything.”

“Hphhhh. Sir Lyle… is a creature of order. Of the straight and narrow. If something doesn’t fit, he tries to pretend it isn’t there. If he can’t ignore it… he tries to change its shape. Do I have it about right, Sir Link?”

“…Yeah. At least, I think so, sire.”

“Let’s discuss it later. You, too, Zelda. Let’s consider that travel itinerary of yours.”

“Yes, father.”

Travel itinerary.

It seems like years ago when she started making that. But… we will finally be going, right? The festival’s over. We’re both well. The Divine Beasts and the Springs still wait, along with who knows how many shrines and other things the Sheikah are digging up.

The Springs. Are we still going?

…I bet we are, if only to give thanks. Not that I think it would matter to the Goddess where you are when you do that, but it might matter to the people of Hyrule.

And here you go, Link. Thinking like the king and the Princess. About what will make people feel secure, not what will actually secure them.

It’s not… entirely without merit, though. I thought them seeing her power for themselves was important, too. And now that she has that, the visibility part finally makes more sense to me.

My plate’s clear, which is kind of amazing considering Zelda’s been shoving things onto it this whole time, most recently an obscenely large pile of bacon.

“I thought I ought to give you a chance to come up for air.”

“Heh. Thanks, Princess.”

“…Are you still hungry?”

“I feel like I could eat two or three more platefuls.”

“Gracious. I’d better-“

“Are you still hungry, too?”

“Indeed, I am. Far more than usual.”

“Then let me. You… stopped eating way before this. Anything you DON’T want me to put on your plate?”

“Hmhm. Not a single thing, Sir Knight.”

“Good. Everything it is, then.”

They’re all watching me load up her plate. Probably wondering if she can eat it.

I just have a suspicion…

I don’t know, of course…

But I bet she can eat like I can if she feels like it. We need lots of energy, don’t we? Lots. And sometime soon, she’ll be lifting a LOT of rocks.

_____

“Hphhhhmm.”

“Zelda… you know, you’re allowed to lean on my shoulder, for once.”

“Allowed, certainly. But you, my knight, have had a far more difficult two weeks than I have.”

Her knight. That’s taken on far more meaning than it had before.

My arm around her waist and my head resting on her, tucked against her neck, her hair tickling my face in the breeze, arcing like the Sun as it traces its inevitable path across the afternoon sky. It’s getting lower each day. Winter approaching.

Pulling tighter against her. Warmer for both of us that way. “Glad we finally made it to the gazebo. It’s nice here when it’s just us.”

“It is a pleasant spot.”

“And visible.”

“Yes. Perfectly visible.”

“Zelda?”

“Yes, my love?”

Neck-and-shoulder-nuzzle. Can’t help it. Not used to her saying that. Not sure I ever will be. “I would like to not be visible sometime later today—with you.”

“Hehe-hh. I think that can be arranged. But for now… visibility is an important component of the plan.”

“Hphhhh. I know. I hope I can control myself.”

“Don’t control yourself too much. We ought, after all, to make our feelings clear in public.”

Her face toward mine. Lowering. Brushing my nose with hers… and now my lips. Her mouth open so slightly- her lips feathering over mine, bottom to top.

She… she’s going to dig into my fantasies again and again, isn’t she? I remember that…

And so does the rest of me because I’m breathing so fast at the imagined feel of her astride and surrounding me while she brought us both to the apex, and now I can feel it more keenly- I know how her muscles move, how they spasm and pulse, and Hylia help me, I want it even more than I did then.

“I believe, Sir Knight-“

Shiver

“I have been somewhat remiss in my communication with you.”

Um. Okay, I wasn’t expecting-

“For many words occur to me which I do not utter.”

Oh?

“Would you like to know my thoughts as I touched my lips to yours just now?”

Oh- “oh, yes.”

“Hmm. As my upper lip met your lower… I thought, how astonishing that these lips are, in effect, mine to do with as I please. I may caress them with mine in order to feel your entire body shudder with want… I may press to them chastely to feel you breathe a soft puff of air against me, wanting more but accepting my restraint… I may open them with little more than an outward flutter and delve into you, and you would not only allow but welcome it, and would, in fact, let me cradle your neck against my arm as I claimed the depths of your mouth for all to see.”

“You can kiss me and hold me any way you want.”

“I know. I know you would permit anything. It gives me enormous power over you, Link.”

“You’ve always had that.”

“Perhaps. Yet I feel I must warn myself not to take it for granted.”

“You won’t.”

“How can you be certain?”

“…I know at the core of my soul, Zelda—you never would. I’d allow you anything… and I know you’d never ask anything I wasn’t willing to give. That’s not you.”

“Link, please don’t say that. You and I both know I may- I may ask you to give your life in the battle to come.”

“And you and I both know I’d give it.” Chee crying in bed.

“…Link, I- hhh. What if it were my life?“

“…What?”

“What if I asked you to give my life, instead?”

Please don’t. Please don’t ask that.

“…Your countenance says that possibility disturbs you in the extreme—and I am unsurprised. For I saw those thoughts, Link… your fear that you might buckle should you hear me scream. …You mustn’t.”

“There’s a difference between hearing you scream, and you telling me to let you die.”

“Would you obey me should I give such an order? If it were necessary to defeat the Calamity?”

If it were necessary?

There’s something in the shadows between the green of her eyes. She’s unguarded. Not trying to hide it. It’s a sadness. A determination. And… a resignation.

There’s a truth here, Link. You feel it in a part of you so deep it might as well be someone else. You thought it already, didn’t you? When you were confused in bed. ‘You have to do what’s best, even if it kills us.’

She really does.

And so do I.

She thinks it makes her less good than I am, but really it makes her more so.

It’s like Mipha said. Her gift is not for her. It’s not there to spare her feelings so she can heal whoever she loves most or whoever will make her feel best. Zelda’s better at understanding that than I am. She sees a bigger picture than I do.

My father was right about that fox.

“I hope I would follow that order, Zelda. I pray that I’d have the strength.”

Here I go. I… won’t even try to hide it. Because it scares the ever-loving s@#$ out of me and if it happens, I won’t be able to cry on her then.

Her hand on my cheek, thumb brushing the tears away. Her lips trembling.

“I’m sorry, Link. I- truly, forgive me. Today was not the day to bring this up. Today, we’re celebrating life. Your life, particularly. I am so, so, indescribably grateful for your life.”

Me, too. “Phh. Hhhh. Kiss me?”

How can her smile wrap up so much love and longing and regret for something that may never even happen in an instant?

Her mouth, warm and inviting this time, not pressing, not even teasing, just open with gentle, loving caresses of her lips against mine. Maybe if I open more, she’ll understand I want her to go deeper-

And she does understand. One hand tightening on my shoulder and the other sliding into my hair, holding me to her while she attends to every sensitive spot she’s found in my mouth. Gripping her waist with one hand. Not sure what to do with the other, probably shouldn’t just hover around her with it-

Her neck. Caress upward, find her jaw, thumb symbols of devotion into her cheek. Nudge her toward me. Deeper, deeper, go as deep as you want, as deep as you can and it still won’t be enough to equal what I feel for you, it’s unreachable, but I never ever want you to stop reaching for it. And she really IS reaching for it with her tongue that far in yes yes more of that please please PLEASE yes deeper-

Oh no, please don’t- “HHhh- hhh- Zelda-“ oh Goddess, she stopped, why did she-

Oh right, we’re in public. “Uhhm. Do you… think anyone saw that?”

“Hmm. It’s certainly possible. But I believe we ought to maximize the statistical probability that multiple people will observe our activities.”

“…You mean we should kiss more.”

“Indeed, I do.”

“So why’d you stop?!”

“Two reasons. Firstly, with my face so close to yours I could not see your expression. And I do very much like to see that.”

And now that expression is an enormous grin. You’re lame, Link.

“And secondly, I’d rather hoped this time you might kiss me.”

Eyebrows up and together. As if there’s any chance I’ll say no!

Move that arm, Link. Get it out from under hers and use it to brace her shoulders instead.

Oooh, that’s like the day with all that wind. She told me to brace her like this. Correct-bracing-style, check!

Gotta wiggle. My butt’s gone numb on this bench.

“Hehehehe!”

Yeaaah, my wiggles are silly. Just you wait. Because…

Sliding my open hand across the lower half of her belly-

“H-hhh! Oh-“

Good, she’s distracted, eyes shut, my lips to her cheek, trailing to her ear, map it, the entire shell with nibble-kisses-

“Hhh-hh-hhh-hh-“

-her earlobe, nibble, nibble, bite-

“Link-“

-suck.

“MMmm- Link!”

Suck. Suck harder.

“Oh!”

Catch her quick, her mouth still open, envelope her, and lick her tongue

“Mmmmmm-hhh!”

Those will be the last sounds I hear in my head before I die. Zelda’s moans and gasps muffled and reverberating all the way down my throat. I’m so glad I’ve heard them. I’ll keep them with me.

That hand on her belly. Slide further. Dig the heel in.

“HHhhh!”

I love that I can do this to her.

But… we are in the gazebo.

And we do have to stop somewhere.

Not least of all because the sooner we’re back at our rooms, the sooner we can finish what we started.

Ease off, Link.

“Oh…”

And she’s… resting her head on my chest, breathing hard.

Crush her to me. “Are you okay?”

“Yes, but perhaps… this is enough statistics for one day.”

“…Anatomy’s next, isn’t it? Please say it is.”

“Hmhmm. Why, Link…”

This is a huge, huge, snuggly hug and there’s a kiss right on the tip of my chin-

“You’ve read my mind.”

“Heh. And I didn’t even need the slate.”

“No. Not at all.”

Her beaming smile. So like the Sun.

I rise with it.

And we’re rising, hand in hand.

Walking toward her tower together.

And if any of the guards are offended by us, they can stuff it.

But somehow, I don’t think they are. Because I see at least… two?... not-so-covert thumbs-ups and that guy over there’s cupping his hands around his mouth-

“GOOD LUCK WITH THE KISSING AND HUGS!”

“Oh, my Goddess-“

“Oh dear. I suppose that made the rounds.”

“Ugh, of course it did, it happened in the kitchen and those ladies TALK.”

“They’ll all be making us flowerless bouquets, next.”

“Pff- pfhaha. You know what? Good. Food for Nails!”

“Hmhmmm. Hm. I love you, Link.”

“…And I love you, Zelda. More than anything.”

“I know.”

Yeah. You do know, don’t you?

But what you don’t know… is exactly how incredibly dirty I’ll talk to you on the slate LONG after you go to sleep.

This is going to be. So. Much. Fun!

~~The End~~

_____

[Note: But there'll be a sequel!]

I would like to say an ENORMOUS thank-you to everyone who stuck through this fic with me. It was long! Thank you for your thoughts, comments, likes and reblogs. I was having fun writing it anyway, but it was always amazing to see someone else enjoying it with me!

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