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birbfeeder2artisticboogaloo · 1 year

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thousand autumns donghua, episode 9~

shen qiao is COUGHING UP BLOOD NOW OH MY GOD!!! FETCH A DOCTOR!! FETCH A PRIEST!! FETCH HIS CRAZY HUSBAND!! FETCH SOMEONE!!! wtf his cab is taking him out of the city, what terrible servi--OH NO IT'S BAI RONG D: bai rong: why are u asking about that old driver for, when there's a pretty lady in front of u??? 😘😘😘 shen qiao: ….i'm blind :( (also gay) OH NO SHE KILLED THE OLD MAN ;A; poor old man, rip lao wei, we never saw u but i assume u had friends or family who are missing u rn…. f in the chat for the tart's victim 😔 ahh she was hiding the sexy outfit under the plain one!! clever!! no one EVER expects the Double Outfit Gambit!! 👘👗 bai rong: come nowww yan wushi is so old and weird!!! i don't like ur boyfriend!! but i could be ur girlfriend!! i want to be ur girlfriend! hEY. HEYYYYY >:) shen qiao: pls stop touching me :( GIRL STOP THIS IS WEIRD THIS IS WEIRDDDDD ;A; oh SHIT GET EM SHEN QIAO!! THAT'S RIGHT!! DON'T LET HER BULLY U!!! everyone thinks they can take advantage of u bc ur a nice lad!! i hate it when ppl do that!! just bc he's nice doesn't mean u can hurt him! it doesn't mean u can mistreat him!! he may be KIND but he's not a fucking door mat!! >:V HE EVEN APOLOGISES TO HORSES FOR FUCK'S SAKE. HE'S SUCH A GOOD BOY ;A; shen qiao: *swoons* the old man arrives just in time to catch him again lmaooo shen qiao be looking at the sword of woe like it's a sword of WHOA D: yws: ur dying lol. why don't u be evil with me?? it'll be fun~ remember how ur pet hobo betrayed u??? didn't that suck?? aren't u tired of being nice?? don't u just want to go apeshit??? >:D SHEN QIAO JUST WANTS TO BE TRUE TO HIMSELF ;A; aww yissss more evil laughter :D ngl i really missed it, it never fails to make me laugh as well 🤣 AWW THEYRE BOTH HAPPY NOW!!!! OH MY GOD THEY'RE SO ADORABLE!!! THEY'RE BOTH JUST. SO HAPPY. I LOVE THEM. I LOVE THEM ;A; oh good he's got his stick back!! i was worried, since that twat broke it before!! poor shen qiao just can't catch a break smh 😔 maybe a broken arm, the way things are going for him 😔 THE MONK!!! i remember him!! is he going to say it?? IS HE GONNA SAY THE THING??? I'M WAITING FOR HIM TO SAY THE THINGGGG yws: i'm gonna go fetch what's his name, u go on ahead ok?? sq: wh-- yws: VIBE CHECK!!! *yeets shen qiao into the building* UH WHO IS WAIT YUWEN YOU???? IS THAT THE FUCKING EMPEROR WHAT THE FUCK I'M SO CONFUSED??? A GO DEADLOCK??? WHY ARE WHY ARE THERE SOLDIERMANS HERE??? ARE THEY MOVING?? IS THIS HOW EMPERORS PLAY GO?? BY MAKING SOLDIERS KILL EACH OTHER??? WTF???? well it's a good thing shen qiao can just. jump onto the life-sized game board. i. i sort of thought that would be cheating but. i guess not??? WTF HE WON HOW???? WHAT JUST???? WHAT JUST HAPPENED???? shen qiao beats the emperor and then politely compliments him like it was nothing. shen qiao who are u. shen qiao WHAT are u. shen qiao are u single OK WE'RE GETTING AN EXPLANATION THEN???? yeah no totally didn't understand at all :D i'm not even sure what go is called in chinese?? i think i heard.......qi?? something??? idk. also wHY ARE THERE SUCH COOL NAMES FOR GAME MANOEUVRES. WHAT IS HAPPENING emperor: lol ur good at board games, u want a job?? shen qiao, thinking: i'm in danger :) OH MY GODDD THE OLD MAN IS CALLING HIM ~A-QIAO~ IN FRONT OF THE FUCKING EMPEROR. IN FRONT OF EVERYONEEEE OH MY GOD uh-oh the monk made emperor angy. somebody better say emituofo for HIM now O_O seeing yan wushi acting polite is. EARTH SHATTERING. so strange. i'm…..shocked??? weird 👀

yws: anyway here are my evil plans. u should stay and help bc ppl will keep trying to kill u without my protection >:) sq: no thanks :) if i just let u shelter me, isn't that the same as being sheltered by mt xuandu?? i'll head out on my own :) yws, thinking: ppl keep treating him badly, but he just perseveres!! it makes me want to……HURT HIM MORE >:) wtf yan wushi u are a strange man. u are a weirdo. pls don't step on shen qiao. he's wearing white the stains will never come out yan wushi PLS lmao yan wushi trying to tempt shen qiao into going to dongkang with him is hilarious, i love the bg music as well!! it's so whimsical~ WELL WELL WHO MIGHT THIS BE??? idk him YET but he's??? kinda hot??? ngl i have a Type and it's. embarrassingly obvious smh rip birb….😔 also: the monk did NOT say emituofo. heartbreaking 😔

#birb watches #thousand autumns donghua #qian qiu #im rly having too much fun with this lmao #i hope my jokes are still funny bc i intend to continue #i have internet access and im going to make it everyone else's problem >:)#birb still says

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itoshi-s · 1 year

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Bllk boys ranking though NNN also i lost bc of ur fics

PLSSSS nonnie im so sorry i made u lose !!! 😭 m happy u enjoyed it so much tho ajfhalkf now let me brainrot over how needy the bllk boys would be during the month of november !

ʜᴏᴡ ʟᴏɴɢ ᴛʜᴇʏ ʟᴀꜱᴛ ᴅᴜʀɪɴɢ ɴɴɴ !

ft: rin, sae, bachira, isagi, ryusei, reo, nagi, aiku, chigiri, kunigami, kaiser, & barou !

cw: nsfw (minors -17 dni!), characters are 18+, fem reader, mentions of rough sex, the boys being switchy, edging, mutual masturbation, sex toys, cannabis !

12. rin - doesn't participate ! ─── yep :( as a rinnie stan myself i know it's disappointing LMAO but he just knows it's unhealthy 😭 and he takes care of himself and his body so much, there's no way. cannot be bothered to take part in such challenges anyway,, they were childish to him at 16 yet alone when he's older sfkfal also is so busy, he'd be a fool to let go of any chance to touch you !!

11. bachira - a day ! ─── no. 1 needy baby ! isn't completely against the idea, actually even tells you he might try it out once you mention it - but he truly forgets all about it as soon as he comes come several hours later .. and sees you looking soooo good. pounces on you within seconds <3 also has an impressive refractory period & stamina too ! can keep going for hours on end and stuff u so full.... it just doesn't end ! he cums for the first time so quick and loses the challenge embarrassingly early but he makes it up to you so well <3

more under the cut !

10. barou - three days ! ─── agrees to your pretty pleading eyes - you want the both of you to try it out so that once the month ends, all hell can break loose ! you know shoei so well, how rough he is on the daily - the thought of him going even further, all desperate and frustrated, makes you giddier than ever. it's of course such a dumb idea to him, but since you're asking him so nicely, he might as well agree..... yeah it only lasts the few days bc he's away on a game and just isn't there to see you and touch you :/ as soon as he's through the front door you can nearly scent the pheromones on him. fucks u into the mattress so hard you're scared of how rough he could be after a whole month !

9. nagi - five days ! ─── he's all about the slow and lazy loving and rarely ever initiates something himself ((you're more than happy to take control though bc just think...... blowing him under the desk while he's gaming???? yeah think bout it)) so you're not at all surprised when he mumbles something about taking part in a challenge the guys talked abt in the group chat . nagi can be a menace with how lazy he is sometimes so you have your toys in handy anyway akfjhsa BUT you honestly would've thought he could last longer ! he might not show his desperation all that often or openly but he definitely is needy <3 ruts into you in your sleep not even a week in. as you wake him and try to scold him playfully , he just pulls you closer with a groan . "'s a pain already," he huffs, "help me out?"

8. isagi - a week and a half ! ─── takes it as a joke at first but figures that it might be fun, actually, and tries it out in the end . he's got very good self control too so is curious how well it'll work when it comes to you and his needs !! it's going pretty smoothly considering how tight his practice schedule is before his next match, BUT it all goes down the drain after said game .. comes back absolutely pumped and high on the goals he scored , on the way he absolutely devoured the other team and controlled the whole field - there's no other way to unwind than to take it out on u <3 it's the only way he knows ! is so loud once he finally takes u & makes u praise him so much ! loves to hear he's your best boy n how good he is to u <3 praise kink yoichi goes brr (yes i am still thinking about the thirst moshi ((@/saetoshis)) did !! its canon i confirm)

7. kunigami - two weeks ! ─── he wasn't rly going to take part when he first read about it in the gc but once he mentions it to you and it turns out you're actually excited abt the thought .. he just might take it up akfhf doesn't actually find it all that difficult and only ever realizes that actually you might be the one taking the hit when you openly start begging for him :( comes home to find u on the bed, teary eyed and overstimulated bc it's just been so long , and masturbation isn't all that exciting anymore ever since u have him . please ren, just drop it already. finds the look on ur face so amusing , you're so miffed as if it wasn't your idea in the first place ! quickly wipes the frown off your pretty features and replaces it with crossed eyes and lolled out tongue tho <3

6. reo - two and a half weeks ! ─── you make him do it <3 and the thought is far too thrilling for him to refuse. also...... he's a switch leaning sub anyway so :( does he even have any word in it? no not really. one look from u is all it takes to make him melt ! it drives you insane to see how he just gives a slight whine or a sigh in the mornings, hard cock straining against his boxers but he's such a good boy - of course he listens and doesn't touch himself <3 just gets up and goes on with his day , knowing better. has this haze over his mind and it shows by his glossy eyes or warm hands that start to roam around your body more frequently . you only ever let him drop it when he's nearly in tears ,, it just hurts !!!!! he cannot keep focus on practice or workouts anymore :( the ache in his tummy and boxers too overwhelming. wraps his arms around you from behind as you cook dinner for u two - sturdy chest pressing all against you, hands grabbing at your waist and there's a shaky breath by your ear. please, please i can't take this anymore. you're not that cruel, and end up praising him for being such a good boy for u for the past weeks <3

4. sae - three weeks ! ─── gets annoyed with the way you keep teasing him, even when he comes home from the longest day of practice ever, and thinks that it might actually be the perfect time to teach you a lesson ! tbh sae strikes me as a dom BUT with solid switch tendencies so !! he actually starts to regret his decision like a week and a half in lol. doesn't let it show at all though and keeps his cool,, knowing that it's exactly how to rile you up <3 giving you such humdrum looks it makes you week in the knees. it's until he sees you come out of the shower, a pretty little vibe in hand, cheeks flushed and eyes lidded when he realizes he might not have the upper hand anymore :( knows that he can keep control of his needs if he has to, but it just gets so fucking annoying, even more so when he knows he's the one that came up with it in the first place. is beyond thankful when u unexpectedly finally BEG HIM to just feel him,, and takes you right here in the moment. puts u in a mating press and fucks you silly only to flip you over and make you ride him as the prettiest little sound start to slip out. ngh- yeah, make m'cum, pretty girl. can't think straight no more. ( > ///////////// < ) cums embarrassingly fast like this as well ...... like just a minute or two of you riding him and grabbing at his shoulders or biceps and he's whining so loud. pretty baby is so flustered tho !!!

4. chigiri - three weeks ! ─── PLEASE he's such a tease ! takes up on the challenge when he hears the boys mention it and is kind enough to give you a heads up . is definitelyyyy one of the biggest menaces of them all tho with the way he riles u up so much. knows that the way he brings his hair up into a loose ponytail instantly makes u think of how he does it whenever he's about to eat you out - so he does it right in front of ur eyes, hairtie in his teeth and giving you a sly look ! makes plans with you so that you just have to go to practice with him first,, otherwise you won't make it on time - because he knows how much it turns you on to see him in the zone <3 thinks that he has it all in control until you crawl between his spread legs and give him the prettiest begging eyes, hands already palming at the sturdy muscle of his thighs, threatening to move higher - right where he now feels the dull ache and strain against his shorts. this is unfair, hyo. haven't i been good to you? isn't all that much of a hard dom,, but definitely makes you feel it how it wasn't worth spurring him on :((

3. aiku - three and a half weeks ! ─── same thing that happened with barou,, but this man has much better self control ! it gets him INSANELY hard and fucking insane to think of how you'll be dripping by the very end of this month , pleading him to finally fill you up. doesn't let you touch yourself either, though </3 so that's what it makes it even more fucked up ! he's the one to convince you to it - has to give a little push bc you're just so needy, the thought alone is enough to make your head spin - but knows that you're actually a lil excited yourself when he sees the glint in your eyes ! doesn't try to tease you all that much but pleaseeeeee have u seen this man .. he doesn't even need to try and he gets you SOAKING ! might just bust a nut himself everytime he thinks of how good it'll feel to finally have you once the month's finished. all of his plans go to waste when you end up watching a movie and smoking a blunt together tho ...... it's ridiculous how you're on top of him within SECONDS after the few first hits kjafhaskfh the weed makes you hazy too you end up going for hourssss on end :( in the morning you're smacking him in the head for even giving u the idea to smoke when you both know how horny u two get afterwards ,, maybe it was his unconscious horny self making the decision tho afhakhsaf

1. ryusei - the whole month ! ─── PLSSSS he's so deranged afafalasfa he LOVES edging the both of u. makes sure u know what's about to come days before november even starts lol and makes good use of it,, you don't even have the energy to think about fucking for the first few days of nov when he's railed u so good minutes before midnight hit 😭 is such a tease during the whole month ! would straight up edge you and bring you right up to your high, only to pull away at the very last second and leave you crying so pretty :( is mean about it, but knows it'll be worth it in the end ! looooves mutual masturbation - thinks that he just might fail when he sees u spread out in front of him, panting and moaning so sweetly, BUT ofc he doesn't let neither of you come . scares you with the way he grabs you so rough and fucks you on the literal floor as soon as the date changes to december :0 pls he's so funny i can see him checking the clock both before it starts & ends gives you the absolute best fuck you've ever had your whole life ,, you need to call in sick the next day bc your cervix is so bruised and gives you cramps :(

1. kaiser - the whole month ! ─── does it just to prove a point. you're a brat to him anyway,, so he's sure you can take matters into your own hands for just a month! (it's not like he absolutely adores the iittle attitude of yours and is the one that always spurs you on even further! definitely not ! </3) considering the world cup is coming soon, he's away most of the days anyways, but usually he'd take care of you as soon as he comes back .. this time he only gives you a good night kiss and pulls you close :( no action whatsoever ! as if you didn't exist to him in any sexual form. also doesn't let you touch him even once either - he despises any distractions after all! it makes you want to cry with desperation cause your own touch just isn't enough - it's a whole other experience to have him manhandling u around and making u do the work to please him ! he takes you to the world cup with him as well,, since he doesn't want u to be lonely ((and actually wants u there with him </3)) so you're extremely fucked . seeing him absolutely trashed and exhausted after a match ?? watching from the first row stands as he absolutely demolishes the field ?? he couldn't get any hotter than he is during the games and u know it :( you end up nearly crying when he finally allows you to touch him , thank him thru the tears and he makes you come in like mere minutes :( won't ever admit that this is the hardest he's ever been lmaoo

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