#in my defence I will read them

[natsarrownecklacx]

I went into town today to get one book. They didn’t have the one I was looking for but I found some sales and ended up leaving with five…

#I have a book buying problem #in my defence I will read them #my friend literally said I wasn’t allowed to buy anymore and dragged me out #money well spent tho 👀

[cobaltfluff]

thank you new official art

#sk8 the infinity #art tag #i forgor to post here too!! in my defence it was 2am #i havent drawn them in so long i was lowkey struggling aklfjlkd #flicks langa's huge ass forehead #he's doing his best!! #also can you guys read my handwriting im always worried it's a struggle to read #i promise it's neater irl #they're so cute i love them

[completeoveranalysis]

DEVASTATING

#July 19 liveblog anniversary time! #And then it will be A DECADE #God I can remember exactly where I was when I started this #The THINGS that have happened since then! #Nick also talks about other things #replies #fieldofclover #TEN YEARS #It has taken me longer to read this than it took them to write it #But in my defence I suppose I did take some very long breaks!

[catofoldstones]

tbh, i was a very casual game of thrones viewer and my fav character was sansa stark and I was absolutely uninvolved with the general viewership/fandom so i assumed that while sansa was not one of the more loved characters, she was somewhat neutral/under-the-radar. therefore you can imagine my surprise when i find out this year (a couple of months back actually) that not only is sansa one of the most talked about characters in a negative light, she actually one of the most viscerally hated ones too.

#oh fandoms. never change #it was a shock SHOCK #one that blew all my hair back #sansa defence squad #anti sansa antis #and on top of it all i liked sansa since s1e1 #so you can imagine when i find out that people hate s1 sansa #it’s all groundless to me #she’s a snitch to you she’s a traumatised 13 yr old to me #we are not the same #why did i even start reading the books he’s never going to finish them #we’re all in this hellhole together spiralling towards a greater insanity #sansa stark #game of thrones #literal jaw to the floor shock

[steelycunt]

ridi im sorry i need to rant and i think youll get it 😭 like not to be a bitch but this fandom kinda going off the rails and annoying the shit out of me https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTRbYASpf/ everybody in the comments unironically loving it,,, i mean wtvr ship who you want but its kinda getting delusional like ppl are just operating on thin air and pretty fancasts atp and i do Not understand or emotionally connect with any of it. at least w wolfstar theres so much material and foundation to explore but what is all the rest of this?? just hot celebrity fancasts and crack. to be fair part of me respects taking a terfs canon material and making everybody gay but the way it seems to be so oversaturating fics and the fandom that characters dont even feel like their original selves .. atp its all just surface level OCs

hello! yes! i'll be honest talking about things like this always make me a little nervous, and i feel obligated to preface anything i say with a disclaimer that none of it really matters, nothing i say matters, and you should do what you like, because--who cares. i am not an authority on--anything, frankly. my opinion holds no more weight than the next guy's, and all i'm doing here is giving it, so. essentially what im saying is--people are perfectly entitled to disagree with me, but people are not entitled to be mean to me about it xx

having said that. it is my personal opinion that s x barty is one of the worst fucking things i have ever heard lol. who even is barty who is that guy. why would s be interested in him at all. i do not understand it it does not make sense to me. from where are we sourcing the character traits and personality that we are giving barty that would ever endear sirius to him, because it objectively cannot be canon.

overall i do not get the new interest in barty + evan + pandora (+ regulus, but we won't go there)...at all, other than guessing that people were bored with the marauders and wanted a new version of them (and new celebrities to fancast) while simultaneously changing next to nothing about them other than superimposing them onto the first slytherin side characters they could rustle up. i expect ive become a bit of a broken record in regards to my dislike of the popular meow-meow-ification + complete absolution of regulus as a character in order to make him a loveable oc (just as i think erasing all the negative traits that r/s have in order to make them more likeable is just as boring), and all of that applies to those other guys as well (with the slight difference that they are, somehow, even less interesting and significant than regulus in canon), so i won't get into that too much. but i think what you say about having no emotional connection to any of it is exactly right lol--it is a sort of shift? i guess? in the fandom that is simply of no interest to me. they are characters that i just have no emotional investment in and admittedly struggle a little to understand why other people do. i am emotionally invested in, like, five characters overall (and even out of those--there's only two i'm really here for innit xx) and i personally cannot extend that investment to a creepy little side character who is mentioned maybe twice in the entire series.

and that is okay! i do not need to understand it. i don't want to say it annoys me because honestly--i don't go there, its nothing to do with me. if i dont like it i just wont interact with it, and the fact that it doesn't interest me has no bearing on what other people are into or want to do, and i couldn't give less of a shit what people do with the canon material, which is largely garbage anyway. take the bits you want from it, play around with those and ignore the rest. in that respect we are all doing exactly the same thing. but yeah i think s x barty is genuinely awful lol. hate it. very terrible. he's already got a loser werewolf boyfriend and he loves him so so much. leave him alone.

#i know most people are reasonable and thus it is perhaps overly cautious of me to insist on shrouding my unpopular #opinions in like. layer upon layer of placatory disclaimers but. well im a rather anxious guy i can't help it xx but im going to use these #tags to have a bit more of a consequence-less hater hour so. if you like regulus or barty or any of that lot i suggest you look away now #because i am about to express opinions about them that you probably wouldnt agree with + wouldnt enjoy reading!! #like full warning what im about to do is NOT any sort of analysis or defence of my opinion i will just be hating on them. is that clear. #okay. having said that. hater hour. barty and evan and honestly regulus were all cunts? like they were terrible people why do we care #about them now. regulus interests me solely as a piece of context for sirius' character. i could not give less of a shit about him as a #person in his own right. which leads me to my next hater moment: why oh why oh WHY on earth would canon james potter be interested #in canon regulus black. it makes sense in like a muggle au where they are virtually completely different characters but canon? #why would he be attracted to him. there is nothing. there is no chemistry i am ASLEEP and so is james. he would not give that #guy a second look. like it just baffles me it truly does. i feel like you have to bend over backwards to create a situation in which #james potter would ever show an interest in regulus. and i know jegulus is a fucking force to be reckoned with nowadays but god i just #do not like that ship. also i think the fact that barty and pandora and evan are essentially just oc characters who have been coloured #in by general fanon consensus shows in that what they have become is just. not interesting or complex or well fleshed out lol. like #idk i feel like they are just. very shallow. deliberately. so they are easy to like and easy to ship because that is what theyre there for. #god it feels so good to say all this. i will never be a hater again (<- lying) but i needed to be able to just. say this just once xx #also if you needed any more indication what barty and evan and regulus are here to do you just have to look at their #super-hot super-conventionally attractive celebrity model fancasts. like it all adds up its like but what if these death eaters were #not actually evil :-( what if they were really sweet and also? so so hot. like they were all so hot and actually really good #and none of them meant to be evil they didnt want to be :-( they were just hot good guys all in love with each other and the evil stuff #they did wasnt their fault :-( like that has to be. the most boring thing you couldve possibly done with these blank slates. surely. #anyway. im done now but i enjoyed hater hour immensely this was so fucking good for my soul xx thanks and goodnight xx #anon #telegram #scream hang on sorry. just looked at the comments of that tiktok where people are saying they were prison besties. girl. girl. #girl they were in prison for very different reasons baby. baby you know that right. baby look at me. look at me

[edenorisshitposting]

My mac may be dying. I don't know if I should upgrade to a newer mac, or go back to windows.

Mac pros: very good at running design software, which is what I want it to do.

Mac cons: Expensive. I miss playing bideo games

Windows pros: Less expensive. Bideo games :)

Windows cons: Fucking awful operating system, I can't believe we let them get away with this for so long

#personal? #don't know what do #if someone in the graphic design field is reading this and have any thoughts #I'd love to hear them #I see everyone having fun with baldur's gate 3 and I'm VERY JEALOUS #But I very much need a good reliable adobe machine #(which is what a mac normally is. Only apparently I have the worst mac version in a while) #(it's a macbook pro 2017) #in my defence we didn't know how bad it was at the time

[princekendallroy]

9 People You’d Like to Get to Know Better

tagged by @burglarhobbit thank u my liz <3<3

last song I listened to: don't let me be misunderstood by the animals

currently reading: im reading one kafka short story a day (right now I'm still on contemplation) and..... chain of gold by cassandra clare (the duality of a woman or whatever)

currently watching: the sopranos and good omens (started rewatching s1, s2 still to go)

current obsession: my baby my baby you're my baby say it to meeeeee

(also I have to mention The Scandinavian Defense (part I and II)- which im cyclically re-reading - and @stonebutchkendallroy 's fic WANT bc im reading every chapter twice as it comes out and im already thinking of reading the whole fic again once it's finished IT’SO GOOD 🥲)

tagging: @evanbuvkley @rhaenryatargaryen @tastethesetears @bievanbuckley @ronanlynchbf @willgaham @tomorrowillmissyou @kenromshiv @fifth-hargreeves

#in my defence for reading shadowhunters in the year of the lord 2023: it started bc I wanted to read the unread books in my bookshelf #and a couple of instalments of the saga were amongst them #and now it bothers me the leave the thing unfinished #*to leave #also ngl the series set in modern times are an entertaining mess #but the victorian and edwardian settings of tid and tlh have me in a chokehold

[spokelseskladden]

no but actually, when I was like 16 I decided to get in deep with the cult, like fanatically deep. Donating my entire allowance and dedicating myself to biweekly bible study deep. Mainly because I had deluded myself into thinking that if only I could become a perfect jehovah’s witness, god would heal my crippling gender dysphoria by either taking pity on me and simply give me a dick and testosterone for the low price of my freedom and dignity, or alternatively taking it away all together and let me live my life blissfully as a cis woman for all eternity in paradise. The latter never sounded appealing to me, and I’m not going to pretend that the blatant sexism within the cult wasn’t a part of it at all, but even if you removed it, I still didn’t particularly care for having tits. I did realize that the former alternative probably wasn’t likely to happen in the end, and that’s probably one of the big reasons I never could admit to actually just being a guy, even though it was kinda obvious. Cause when you know you can’t ever have something, it’s easier to pretend you never wanted it in the first place, lol

#ex jw #isn't it funny that I even entertained the idea of fucking JEHOVAH giving me top surgery or some shit? #dude are you daft? the babykiller who hates the gays? You really think THAT GUY would support trans rights? #also. my OG mutuals probably remembers me sort of coming out as nonbinary back then‚ and i want you to know that I was not #practically everything I ever said about my gender back then wasn't real and I KNEW it wasn't real. I was just scared as fuck lol #cause I couldn't open that can of worms and then close it again. and like yeah. experimenting with gender can be great and important #but I wasn't experimenting‚ I knew it wasn't completely right from the moment I said it and idk. I want that out in the open I guess lol #funny thing is I kinda did that thing AGAIN not that far back when I was like oh yeah any pronouns goes :) oh no it's they/them achtually #oh now im he/they and oh I just want to define anything and blah blah blah #and I was sitting there and I just asked myself what the hell I was doing cause you're a grown ass man and you KNOW you're spewing bullshit #like i thought i would keep things ambigous but in hindsight. the url i had and having my other name in my bio was kinda stupid #in my defence i didn't think about my url and i still don't really mind my legal name so lol #but i realized i was just pussyfooting around everything and i'm tired of it so yeah! #anyway. look at me revealing my fucking lore here. i've gotten way off track and idk what i was trying to get to #if you read this far you get like. knowledge about me you probably didn't want #you're welcome i guess? idk lol #insert drive through meme or something

[byanyan]

woke up thinking about byan having cryptic text hidden within the art of the tattoos that are tied to their traumas... for when the images themselves aren't a strong enough reminder of lessons learned 🤔

#the text being hidden to discourage & help them avoid questions like 'oh what does that mean?' when strangers (and even not-so-strangers) #happen to see these tattoos #especially bc the text 'he deserved it' immediately popped into my mind for the tattoo they got after they killed in self defence #tell me that wouldn't get a shitload of questions if it was obviously visible lmfjsjfsj #but I feel like sometimes they need to be able to see & read it... especially just after it happened hey NEEDED that visual reminder #to help alleviate their guilt and feel less like some fucking monster for what they did #and I think that's the case with a lot of the shit they've been through... #they need words of reassurance but don't really get any from the world around them... so they weave them into their more meaningful tattoos #that way they can look at them and get that validation when they need it #but it's also not obvious enough that strangers feel like they're allowed to ask personal questions or jump to conclusions #idk idk new idea I'm playing around with..... bc I am always slowly sloooowly working out the rest of byan's tattoos #━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ ooc ⋮ don’t @ me.

[hella1975]

obsessed with you being like "i'm rereading trk rori block the tag i promise you don't want spoilers!" babygirl i am insane off my rocker and i've finished the last 2 books in the infamous all for the game series within 48 hours in that time i have read about 4 times as much aftg as you have

i forgot how powerful the aftg psychosis is you're right i should have predicted this

#in my defence i fully let you go into tfc CONVINCED you were gonna be a gloomy 2.0 #like i truly went my entire life not seeing a single person escape The Phenomenon once they started and the one (1) time someone did #it snapped me out of it and instantly made me be like 'everyone hates these books forever' #like. i hate them. i could never hate them. i too read all three books within 2 feverish days when i first read them. #i want to go back there. i never want to feel that way ever again #like yeah no shit youve read them quicker than me im going in with prior knowledge the books themselves are a trigger warning for me #im putting my MENTAL HEALTH first that's how fucked they are. boom is worried about me and told me to stop reading. this is life or death #for me. i wish i could set fire to my laptop and then my brain. #ask #aftg

[aroacehanzawa]

help i just realised i cancelled plans with friends/acquaintances to stay home and read cnp. and then proceeded to shitpost about cnp on my instagram stories. where said friends could see it

#in my defence it's super windy today and i would have to bike there but it's so far and windy #and that's the reason i decided to stay home and started reading cnp instead #i didn't say anything to them other than a generic sorry i can't make it #also i never give explanations about why i can't make it to things so. it's whatever yknow

[deus-ex-mona]

when you can never forget… _(:3 」∠)_

#mad cringe 3am rant incoming pls stand by— #…so i found my enstars screenshots from 2018 and i don’t even remember half of them happening h e l p #there’s stuff like spamming for repayment fes event nazuna niichan till i had 0 dia left… #…and making ship birthday board things for the 2019 birthday events. i made leokasa and subahokke ones s o bs #and i think i saw a makoizu ss from the librarian event? the outfit + blushing seaweed head sure looks like it’s from that event #(tfw you’re the only one shipping this problematic ship lmao) #also speaking of enstars hi are there any other hokke recasting rejectors out there👀👀👀 #hokke’s current va has been voicing him for much longer than his previous va ever did and i *still* can’t get used to his ‘new’ voice lmao #i remember benching his 5☆ so fast the moment i heard his ‘new’ voice post-recasting. sad times. initial hokke was my first 5☆ too… #but the most cringe memory i have of enstars is… downloading it thinking it was a haikyuu game bc subaru lowkey looks like hinata. #in my defence i couldn’t read japanese back then ok. i was so confused when they told me to pick an idol unit bc ‘where my volleyboys at???’ #i really should’ve realised something was up when i saw hokke (or as i thought he was back then: haru from the swimming anime) appear smh #it took me like 2 months to get through the tutorial bc i was so confused. 0/10 experience; should’ve quit enstars on the first uninstall #but lmao i still have the og enstars app unupdated on my old phone. it still has the dumb 4th anni thing on the icon. time flies… #and well if you read this for some reason or other… go listen to ‘crush of judgement’ or ‘sei shounen yuugi’👀 they’re the best songs (imo) #also nazuna niichan is the bestest boy and prettiest boy and the cutest boy and have you seen his frozen ice card it’s so cute and aaaaaaa— #also now that that’s done can i talk about my 3.5 year long love live phase— #ok i think i got enough cringe out of my system for now. #tune in in a few hours for (maybe) more cringe tag blubbering about shin jidai this time (provided my dvd comes in today dhl p l s—) #it is suiyoubi my dudes #inedible blubbering

[mishkakagehishka]

I SAW ENST GATEKEEPER I JUST LOGGED IN. EHAT HAPPENED

I'M SO SORRY LIS😭😭

#HELP OKAY SO CRASH COURSE #they remade - new url is enstars-discourse #they mentioned me by url (like i got a notif an all it made me feel so special) #accused me of sending my ''big following'' to harass them ''unfairly'' #but also admitted to harassing other people in the same post #READ their pinned post btw their defence was ''i did it to protect [the people they harassed]'' #the way i pissed myself laughing #and also i am 99% sure i know exactly who it is #asks

[variousqueerthings]

I don’t think that Hawkeye is all that cynical -- he’s got cynicism in him sure, there’s a streak of that, but it’s not his chief motivator by far. 

In fact I’d argue he actively fights cynicism in a way that suggests far more of the idealist, sentimentalist, and even optimist (again, pessimism is a trait of his, and may? even come more naturally than optimism, but he doesn’t let that stop him from assuming he’ll save every patient that comes his way, from getting deeply emotionally involved with others even though it’s not going to last over and over again, or from imagining Crabapple Cove over the horizon).

I feel like the main two reasons he gets called cynical (in-show and out) are the fact that he’s Going Through It mentally in a host of ways, and because of the use of comedy to cover it up, but the comedy isn’t all that cynical either. It often happens in the OR, but it’s not trying to make out that the surgery isn’t important, or that he isn’t feeling deeply about the war. And then there’s the comedy he does specifically to cheer others up, which definitely doesn’t suggest those things.

When he acts out, it’s not (usually) cynicism either, it’s righteousness. He’s the arbiter of what is right and wrong, and who is right and wrong, and how to deal with what is wrong, whether it be by crashing a peace talk, or by bullying a bunkmate whom he sees as representative of what is in some way wrong in the world. 

(He’s also incapable of being alone with his thoughts/of being left out of things/of not being noticed, but that’s also not cynicism, although it may lead to it if in own company for too long).

I think there’s a distinction between a character who’s world-weary and therefore shuts out the world by being pessimistic, and petty, and instead of facing it making (often harmful) jokes about it all, and a character who’s world-weary because he’s entirely incapable of shutting out the world because he’s very sensitive, and so needs to cope as best as he can, either by numbing with alcohol or jokes or disordered eating or constant activity + insomnia, or by leaning into aggressive optimism and idealism and chasing positive deep emotions, for however long they last.

and then every once in awhile all the things that trickle in despite all of his coping mechanisms, build up and up until he does... something, so it’s better to put all of that energy into smaller impulsive activities before it gets that far.

#MASH #im watching MASH #hawkeye pierce #this isn't a take ive seen on here (the cynical one) (also i say this as if ive been able to look at any blogs yet 😭) (soon) #I was out seeing some friends I haven't met in quite awhile and mentioned it to them #and the ones who'd watched it (and in their defence not in awhile) were describing him using that word #and I've definitely come across a news article or two doing the same #and of course on the show itself -- this is during my rewatch though and s1 hawkeye isn't fully formed yet #so that may be a s1 fluke #(I havent reached sometimes you hear the bullet but there have been a couple of indications already) #(his anti-racism -- the yankee doodle doctor episode #... various little peeks into a more rounded hawkeye generally -- oh his wimpishness is also suggested early #(and his bisexuality -- or at least his non-normative masculinity as opposed to Frank's disgust in it)) #sentimental constantly overstimulated hawkeye read is the hill i'll... not die on but certainly not be pushed off

[bibleofficial]

hot take but i love billboards they’re like the bathroom magazines of driving

#bc im reading them while needing to focus at a matter at hand #stream #ALSKAKSKALKSLSKSLAKS it makes me laugh bc i drive w my knee & i hold my hands so it’s very pensive as i read the signs & think … #i hate living in a state where u have to drive #BUT BILLBOARDS ARE SOOOO NICE #i mean & in my defence it’s not like ‘oh there’s woods and greenery’ nah man it’s a fuckin abandoned scrapyard & concrete #like ain’t nothin prettier to look at ?? 😭😭

[dandelion-fae]

The interesting thing about being a fanfic writer but having different social names for fanfiction is the few times I'll see someone talk about something that sounds like something I wrote but I also don't want to call attention to the fact that I might have written what they read because it feels weirder admitting that I wrote that to literally anyone I don't know irl. And also vaguely like signing a warrant for my own arrest.

#that one audio that goes “don't be suspicious don't be suspicious” but make it hurriedly scrolling away from the post as if OP can sense you #its kinda funny tho #just the irrational fear that the OP can sniff me out like a bloodhound despite having not even interacted besides reading the post #in my defence i have none #but also i do make my readers cry so like i will avoid them in the wild to the best of my ability