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gods-favorite-autistic · 8 months

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Good Omens incorrect quotes:

Aziraphale: You know, I'm starting to regret showing you how that blender works.

Crowley, drinking toast: Why do you say that?

~

Aziraphale: Violence isn't the answer.

Crowley: You’re right.

Aziraphale: *sighs in relief*

Crowley: Violence is the question.

Aziraphale: What?

Crowley, bolting away: And the answer is yes.

Aziraphale, running after them: NO-

~

Aziraphale: Do you take constructive criticism?

Crowley: I only take cash or credit.

~

Aziraphale: I've already sent good vibes your way… they’re coming. There’s nothing you can do to stop them.

Crowley: This is the most threatening way I’ve ever been cheered up.

~

Aziraphale: *Kicks the door down looking panicked*

Crowley: What did you do?

Aziraphale: Nobody died.

Crowley: WHAT KIND OF ANSWER IS THAT?!

~

Aziraphale: Treat spiders the way you want to be treated.

Crowley: Killed without hesitation.

Aziraphale: No.

~

*how season 3 should start*

Aziraphale: Top 30 reasons why Aziraphale is sorry... Number 5 will surprise you!

Crowley: Top 30 anime deaths. Number One: YOUR FUCKING ASS RIGHT NOW!!!

~

Crowley: You're right.

Aziraphale: That's... That's an unusual phrase for you. Did you just learn it?

~

Beelzebub: I’m going to take you out

Gabriel: great, it’s a date!

Beelzebub: I meant that as a threat.

Gabriel: See you at five!

~

Crowley: *Walking in to a room* Sorry I’m late... I was... doing things.

*Sounds of running footsteps progressively getting louder*

Gabriel: *Out of breath* THEY PUSHED ME DOWN THE FUCKIN’ STAIRS.

~

Beelzebub: I made tea.

Crowley: I don’t want tea.

Beelzebub: I did not make tea for you. This is my tea.

Crowley: Then why are you telling me?

Beelzebub: It is a conversation starter.

Crowley: That’s a lousy conversation starter.

Beelzebub: Oh, is it? We are conversing. Checkmate.

~

Aziraphale: This is bothering me.

Crowley: Well, you are digging up a corpse.

Aziraphale: No, not that. That's, uh, pretty par for the course, actually.

~

Aziraphale: Whaddya call a fish with no eye?

Gabriel, not looking up: Myxine Circifrons

Aziraphale:

Aziraphale: fsh

~

Crowley: God, give me patience.

Gabriel: I think you mean 'give me strength'.

Crowley: If God gave me strength, you'd be dead.

~

Aziraphale: You know, not every problem can be solved with a sword.

Crowley: That's why I carry two swords.

~

Gabriel: So what’s for dinner?

Beelzebub, staring at the food they just burnt: Regret.

~

Muriel: Why are you on the floor?

Crowley: I'm depressed.

Crowley: Also I was stabbed, can you get Aziraphale, please.

~

Store Worker: Would a Mr. Fell please come to the front desk?

Aziraphale, arriving at the desk: Hello, is there a problem?

Store Worker: points to Crowley and Muriel

Store Worker: I believe they belong to you?

Crowley and Muriel, simultaneously: We got lost :(

Aziraphale: I didn’t even bring you guys here with me-

~

Muriel: Sometimes I drink milk straight out of the container.

Crowley: The cow???

Muriel: What?

Aziraphale: Crowley, W H Y?

~

Aziraphale: Do you ever want to talk about your emotions, Crowley?

Crowley: … No.

Muriel: I do!

Aziraphale: I know, Muriel.

Muriel: I’m sad!

Aziraphale: I know, Muriel.

~

Muriel: What if I press the brake and gas at the same time?

Crowley: The car takes a screenshot.

Aziraphale: For the last time, get the fuck out.

~

Crowley: Aziraphale and I don’t use pet names.

Nina: I see. Hey, what are those things with the halos called again??

Crowley: Angel?

Aziraphale: Yes, dear?

Crowley:

Nina: Don't ever lie to my face again.

~

Muriel: I really like this whole ‘good guy, bad guy’ thing you guys have going on.

Crowley: It’s not an act, it’s just that I’m mean and Aziraphale isn’t

~

Aziraphale: We need a distraction.

Crowley: Is anyone here good at jumping up and down and making weird noises?

Muriel, whispering: My time has come

~

Aziraphale: Let me show you a picture from last night that really upset me

Muriel: Okay, but in my defense, Mr. Crowley bet me 50 cents I couldn’t drink all that shampoo.

Aziraphale: That’s not what I wanted to- you drank SHAMPOO?!

~

Aziraphale: Crowley, keep an eye on Gabriel today. They're going to say something to the wrong person and get punched.

Crowley: Sure, I’d love to see Gabriel get punched.

Aziraphale: Try again.

Crowley, sighing: I will stop Gabriel from getting punched.

~

Maggie: Are you the big spoon or the little spoon?

Crowley: I'm a knife.

Aziraphale, from across the room: They're the little spoon.

~

Aziraphale, driving Crowley and Muriel: So how was your day?

Muriel: We almost got surprise adopted!

Aziraphale: What?

Crowley: We almost got kidnapped.

Aziraphale: Oh, okay.

Aziraphale: *slams on the breaks* WAIT WHAT?

~

Aziraphale: You have to apologize to Gabriel

Crowley: Fine.

Crowley: 'Unfuck you' or whatever.

~

Crowley: Hey angel,

Aziraphale: Yes?

Crowley: Can a person breathe inside a washing machine while it’s on?

Aziraphale:

Aziraphale: Where’s Gabriel?

~

Aziraphale: WHY. why did you give Muriel a KNIFE?!

Crowley: I’m sorry. They said they felt unsafe.

Aziraphale: Now I feel unsafe!

Crowley: I’m sorry.

Crowley: ... would you like a knife?

~

Muriel: Hey, Mr. Crowley? Can I get some dating advice?

Crowley: Just because I’m with Aziraphale doesn’t mean I know how I did it.

~

Aziraphale: Crowley and I are having a baby.

Muriel: That's gre-

Aziraphale, slamming adoption papers on the table: It's you, sign here.

~

Muriel: Are you sure this is the right direction?

Crowley: Certainly, I'm as sure as I am honest!

Aziraphale: In that case, we're definitely lost

~

Muriel: What do you think Mr. Crowley will do for a distraction?

Aziraphale: They’ll probably, like, make a noise or throw a rock. That’s what I would do.

*Building explodes and several car alarms go off*

Aziraphale: ... or they could do that.

~

Aziraphale: I trust Crowley.

Muriel: You think they know what they're doing?

Aziraphale: I wouldn't go that far.

~

Aziraphale: While I’m gone, Muriel, you’re in charge.

Muriel: Yes!!!

Aziraphale, whispering: Crowley, you’re secretly in charge.

Crowley: Obviously.

~

Aziraphale: In your opinion, what’s the height of stupidity?

Crowley: *turning to Gabriel* How tall are you?

#featuring a lot of inneffable husbands #Crowley and Aziraphale being Muriel’s parents essentially #Aziraphale refusing to let Crowley drive with Muriel in the car #a tiny bit of inneffable bureaucracy #a whole lot of Crowley openly hating Gabriel now that he can’t get smited for that #bad influence Crowley #Maggie and Nina supporting the dumbass gays #they/them Crowley and Muriel #and just Crowley being my favorite character #maddy’s thoughts (taken straight from the brain)#good omens #good omens 2 #inneffable husbands #inneffable bureaucracy #incorrect good omens quotes

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newobsessionincoming · 9 months

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Remember when we all freaked out about this line in the trailer and jumped straight to our ineffable husband headcanons…

Well…turns out Inneffable Bureaucracy was in front of us the whole time.

#they just want to be near that one particular person that is there heaven #inneffable bureaucracy #good omens 2 #innefable husbands #neil gaimen #good omens #gos2 spoilers

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aggressive-p0tat0 · 9 months

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Gabriel and Beelzebub quotes that hit different the second time around:

“Well, wherever he is, you find Gabriel for me, and you can have whatever your nasty little heart desires.”

“You know what it's like when you don’t know anything at all, and yet you’re totally certain that everything would be better if you were just near one particular person?”

“Anyway, that’s how I felt that, so long as I came here, the something terrible might not happen to me.” ... “Please, tell me about the ‘something terrible’.” “What? I don’t know. I just know that it’s incredibly awful...”

“You’re perfect.”

#good omens #good omens 2 #good omens season 2 #gos2 #good omens spoilers #good omens season 2 spoilers #gos2 spoilers #inneffable bureaucracy #beelzebub #archangel gabriel #good omens gabriel

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graceallisonsworld · 9 months

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fucking sobbing because gabriel/beelzebub both went to crowley/aziraphale for help because they knew they’d understand their situation 😭😭😭

#inneffable bureaucracy #ineffable lovers #good omens #crowly x aziraphale #boxfly

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captaincleverusernamehere · 9 months

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An unexpected outcome of season 2 is that I now smile whenever I see a fly indoors. That’s just beelzebub lookin out for someone :)

#good omens #good omens season 2 #go s2 #gos2 spoilers #beelzebub #beelzebub good omens #inneffable bureaucracy

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black-tipped-angel-wings · 8 months

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I've seen quite a lot of predictions for Season 3 including every Angel has a Demon love counterpart and vice versa. I've seen theories that there will be teenage Jesus where Ty Tennant will be playing the part. I've seen predictions about the Them returning, especially centered around Adam.

So I raise you, Jesus x Antichrist ship in Season 3. This will be hilarious and will truly tie the connections of love between Heaven and Hell with a pretty little ribbon.

#good omens #go season 1 #go season 2 #aziraphale #crowley #ineffable husbands #inneffable bureaucracy #go season 3 #good omens theory

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prngslvr · 9 months

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"if you did the good thing and I did the bad thing" in season one

and

"I'm a demon. I lied." and then aziraphale lying constantly in season 2 ...

both of them have always been a little more human than demon or angel. and not to say that I think they should end up mortal or human by the end of the show but I do think there's alot that could be said about their relationship to religion and the systems they've been abused by and how their morals are clearly not set in stone or black and white, something that is obviously diverting from their extended time away from their workplaces. the human influence on them has changed their loyalties and their morals to something much greyer.

#and as much as i love the anylysis about crowleys feelings on season 2 #i really think this hurts aziraphale ALOT to have to go back to the system that has abused both himself and his lover #but he genuinely thinks he needs to do this for the good of the world #which is also a conversation that links bc their loyalties are to the world or eachother rather than heaven and hell #good omens #good omens 2 #gomens #aziraphale #crowley #azicrow #aziracrow #ineffable husbands #inneffable bureaucracy #neil gaiman #aziraphale and crowley

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strawberryqueen00 · 9 months

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GOOD OMENS SEASON TWO SPOILERS

Okay but can I talk about one really brilliant part of the “ineffable bureaucracy” misdirect I don’t see talked more about is the Gabriel misdirect the season pulls. Specifically on why we’re lead to piece together why he initially left Heaven.

So the reason why Gabriel initially went down we piece from “Jim” is that he was looking for something and that there is some horrible “thing” that will happen if he’s in heaven.

And so when we figure out that the consequence for Gabriel going against Armageddon is….just getting demoted as the audience we assume he was just upset about the demotion. Because the audience has a predetermined view of Gabriel’s character in our mind.

Then the reveal with Beelzebub happens and we realize this was such a horrible thing for Gabriel because he’s the lowest level angel. We’ve seen how the last lowest level was treated in Muriel. He will be kept in heaven, no longer able to see Beelzebub in Earth.

The “horrible thing” Jim was referring to was being away from his lover. Even with no memories that was such a strong enough feeling.

#good omens #good omens 2 spoilers #inneffable bureaucracy #gabriel #beelzebub #good omens spoilers

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couldve-been-cloud · 1 day

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Sometimes i get startled by my old tags

Like wdym i used to ship the demon of gluttony and an archangel together?

WDYM I USED TO SHIP THEM???

#not dungeon meshi #inneffable bureaucracy #good omens beelzebub #good omens gabriel

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pennytoffee · 9 months

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