#me: no i havent that is NOT what i want to d--

[undefeatablesin]

My angel, my pride and joy, my beloved AKA the Good Hunter Ruza lmao 🧡 ft. Her Lost Chikage and her fun outfit from these screenshots! + some lil headshots of her in the Yharnam Hunter Garb, a look I also care Deeply About ✨️

#sin scribbles #bloodborne #good hunter #good hunter bloodborne #hunter bloodborne #bloodborne oc #bloodborne oc ; ruza #(ITS DONE CAN U BELIEVE IT I SURE CANT!!!!) #(yes. i repeat. this was largely inspired and enforced by me playin d/m/c5 again. LOL.) #(look.......is it my fault my favourite games happen 2 both be about monster hunters with cool swords???) #(anyways whatever AHEM *shuffles notes*) #(i do rly like ruza in the knights garb tbf its fun and flashy. especially in game where everything is dark af) #(very fun to draw. but i prefer her in the actual hunting garb so THATS WHAT WE STICKIN WITH.) #(at least for now idk my mind changes like the weather sis thats largely why i havent given her a new ref sheet) #(or posted her new bio bc tbh im cursed!!!) #(as soon as i post a ref or a bio i immediately want to change it all. so. i just wont LOL) #(if yall still curious about her u can just send an ask or a dm or smth i dont bite 😂) #(this was supposed to be a sketch sheet can u tell i lied deceived played myself to filth) #(bonus cainhurst armor look bc i love that set SOOOOO....much) #(watch out yall sin is back at it with her nonsense cloth physics again)

[turtletoria]

my favorite wordgirl character, jerma

#turtlearts #wordgirl #wg #jerma #dr two brains #steven boxleitner #ok funny story. my lockscreen is fanart of jerma right #and my mama saw it and said is this the guy you like? and i was like :D YAS ITS JERMA 985 MY FAVORITE GUY #and my mama was like oh is that the guy you draw all the time? and i was like draw all the time?? i havent really drawn jerma all that much- #WAIT. OH. OHHHH..... #my mama confused steven with jerma. i exploded #but also yeah i see the similarity so much #ive come to the conclusion that i like 1 (one) kind of white guy and theyre weird and funny guys that have a rodent motif #jerma and steven and will wood are all the same to me. sorry #jerma is the rats rats we are the rats guy. 2 brains is self explanatory. will wood has lovely pet rats. #and he sings about them. his new album even has the rat motif and i love love tomcat disposables argggghhh #oogh. i want a pet rat. lovely creatures #also why do i keep putting so much effort into what should otherwise be low effort memes???????? its driving me insane #it makes the joke unfunny and the payoff doesnt equal the amt of work that went into it!!!!!!!!! arrrrgggghhh #i literally spent so many hours on the burger one and i hate it so much. cries

[oatbugs]

pls i need to provide updates

#basically yesterday night was chaharshanbe suri . which is a solar new yr tradition where we let go of the past suffering in our year #and like...start the new yr w fresh vigour . anyway so my friend was at the event and we were abt to leap over the fire #and she was like bro im im glad u blocked her (situationship) etc etc . and then. my phone started vibrating. and i look at it. and my f #friend looks at it. and its her. and were both like what the fuck?? i blocked her things r Over and anyway so i pick up the phone and shesl #acting like nothing happened (bc nothing DID happen for her) and she was like ohh ur doing chaharshanbe suri im not doing anything etc what #are ur new yr plans so i jusr .IDK WHY I DID THIS . but ig i didnt wanna come off as like lonely i said probably hanging out w family and #friends maybe reading poetry together . et cetera and she was like wait that sounds so fun why didnt u invite me! #LIKE WDYM YOUVE BEEN CONSISTENTLY MAKING IT CLEAR U DONT WANT TO BE IN MY PRESENCE . and i told her that after #everything i thought she didnt want to see me again and she was like you always think that 😐 . like. ?? ok anyway so she expects me to #invite her . and like. there is an above 0% but sub-5% chance she will actually show up . but the panic that gripped me #i started making calls to my friends asking them if they can come on the 23rd bc there must be an event and also i asked my mother #and she said actually yeah i am doing a thing on the 23rd :D it involves over 16 ppl (we live in a v small flat) of which like...7 are kids #so you wont have space to be in ur own room let alone invite others. which tbh like ...being around a bunch of loud kids doesnt seem fun fo #any of my friends or me etc so i thought maybe i should arrange things so that we all go out together and if she shows up she shows up 🤷‍♀️ #but . im so. WHY DID I SAY THAT . i had to panic-call my research partner and ask him to get from oxf to where i live on the 23rd #and when he heard the explanation he like. the light in his voice disappeared 💀 but he potentially agreed so idk #THE ISSUE IS. 23rd im supposed to also have . a date #w this girl that i had a huge crush on when i was 15-16 (posted abt this b4 but id get shitty black coffee in the mornings just to spend a #few more minuted w her each day and she was the cleverest girl in school and she cared abt nothing but her academics but now shes very gay #scraggly homosexual etc etc shes cute) and YEAH IDK #like id have to go there on the date come back fast meet ppl POTENTIALLY (again under 5%) meet situationship girl #like is that even doable #but the thing is it would be so so so funny bc all of my friends dislike her sooo much #.........what if i invited the girl im supposed to have a date w over to hang out w us #god that would be so hilarious and chaotic . i wont do it tho im a mature person x #but it would be soooo funny #I HAVE AN ASSIGNMENT DUE TMRW 12:30PM IT IS 10:49PM RN I HAVENT STARTED IT bc i was rotting sadly in bed #popped a ritalin pill tho so here we go x #i have found myself in a state of such sheer agony and rage and sorrow and grief over this girl that atp i feel like #its just so entertaining . like i feel vaguely over it? ik nothing will come of it so its like just . have fun . vibe

[dizzybizz]

a wuhwuh that took way too long bc i decided to try krita and i was so lost the entire time

#i feel like i spent more time trying to find my way around than actually drawing and thats probably correct. #couldnt be arsed to fully render this one RIP #trigun #nicholas d. wolfwood #trigun fanart #my art #me throughout the entire process: wuh??? wuh.......?? WUH??!???????? #krita is so confusing...... why is it like that.... didnt help that i switched language in the middle of it bc english was different than #what im used to for art programs but then everything was different and i could barely locate the blending modes i wanted and #it was a whole mess #i like some of the brushes a lot tho #i feel so exhausted after that #i could sleep for 24h #im like sluggishly working my way through the manga atm #started it AND the 98 series AND stampede on the same day bc apparently i hate myself like that #i havent been keeping up with stampede since?? ep9??? i think???

[lopsidedtreetrunks]

Happy 10th birthday to The Song Ever

#guys can u believe its been 10 years i feel so old bsksdjlka #ylvis #what does the fox say #my art #artists on tumblr #sketch #gonna write a novel in the tags now so: #i havent drawn anything in a few months bc ive been dealing with medical stuff #this sketch was supposed to become a full painting and it was gonna be awesome and the composition was gonna be great etc etc #this sketch has been in my files since late june lmao thats how long its been since i drew anything #so yes i am very disappointed that i couldnt finish it but since it's such a momentus occasion I thought I'd post this mess anyway :') #I just really wanted to commemorate it as (and sorry for getting all depressing here lol) ... #... it was kinda the last thing that brought me a whole lot of joy before a lot of shit started going on in the family that basically ... #... ended my childhood (metaphorically) #anyways i loved it when it came out i listened to it constantly along with their song stonehenge (which i still listen to occasionally hjsd #and truckers hitch when that came out about a year later i think #ANYWay sorry for rambling and being a sad little guy in the tags lol enjoy the art and listen to the song :D

[cuteiemonster]

My piece for the @hermithorrors zine!! I had the honor of drawing Jevin’s face melting into slime!! ^-^

#cuteiecreates #ijevin #hermitcraft #ask to tag #body horror tw #scopophobia tw #? #gore tw #i recorded. Most of my process?? im pretty sure. so if someone wants a speedpaint of this lmk and ill work on editing it together vnskdjfv #but yeah!! i had so much fun with this!! my idea changed a lot but im so happy with how it came out!! ;o; #and everyone else did such a good job too!! LITERALLY FROTHING AT THE MOUTH OVER EVERYONE ELSE'S WORK #if u want to see the whole zine go check out hermithorrors!!!!!!!!!!!! :D #please ;_; #no but actually i havent posted horror in so long i dont know what tags i should use so please let me know if u need this tagged as anything #!!! i do not bite :] #edit: changed the tags to lowercase because it wasnt showing up in tags and apparently that helps?? ty fellow zine ppl ;_;

[gifti3]

happy bday to me! 🎂🥳🎉

for this very special day i wanted to list and compare the presents and interactions i got in the mobile games ive been playing consistently lmao

under cut cause the pics are big

Time Princess A letter with 10 golden tickets, 100 stamina, and 10000 coins

Obey Me! Nightbringer 1 UR+, UR, and SSR Joker each 3 Demon Vouchers 30 Karma Points 200 AP 30000 Grim 50 Devil Points Along with a bday video, birthday calls from the characters throughout the day and a UR guarantee for a 10 pull There's half-off on Devil Tree unlocks There's also special birthday dialogue in the Surprise Guests: -- the first Surprise Guest I did gave me 30 more Devil Points -- and you can press anywhere on the boys and get max hearts :]

What in HELL is Bad They haven't implemented bday stuff yet so nothing (´。＿。｀)

Twisted Wonderland A Happy Birthday from the character you have set as your favorite card and a Tenfold Key Set (for rolls)

and last but not least.....*drum roll* 🥁🥁🥁 Love and Deepsace! Special Happy Birthdays from each guy which include them singing happy birthday to you :3 Birthday Dialogue on the home screen Presents from each one (items you can use to decorate their desks) 500 Diamonds 5 Empyrean Wishes 1 Bottle of Wishes: SSR 1 Energy Capsule: Powerful And 2 birthday stickers

#so whb is technically in last place but since its a newer game ill let it pass this year #so time princess is next in line for last place #its a fine gift but since they dont have any characters saying happy birthday it doesnt do much for me #nightbringer kinda surprised me! #i was expecting a call and some devil points #but this is a lot more then i expected :3c #also i go crazy for free UR+ Jokers #i was thinking of adding regular obey me but decided to skip it since i only really just log in for dailies for the most part #(and i dont even do that everyday if im not feeling it) #also theyre practically the same minus the calls (but i have the old ones that i havent listened to yet still) #twst was cute nothing too crazy #(thank you for ur presence lilia) #i liked love and deepspaces happy bdays from the characters a lot because they sang lmao 😭 #also i feel very special from them saying all this nice stuff about hoping that i get what i want and that i stay healthy and stuff dwsiiws #it feels like obey me has more in character interactions BUT when i think it about it more #deepspace has the models actually hand you gifts #also the moment you have with the characters feels more personal #but tbf theres more obey me characters and you do get those calls throughout the whole day! (also they give more stuff imo) #so i cant really pick which one i liked more :d #dutp #obey me nightbringer #twisted wonderland #love and deepspace #im now 26.... #oh jeez #long post #still doing the same shit i was doing in middle school uashusha (i mean playing dating games) #my personality has refined over the years tho #anyways im gonna celebrate tomorrow with my family :] #this is the end of my post tho ill probably post about the asmo phone call later

[echo-s-land]

It's insane how most of the time I don't get how ppl interact and I also Don't Fucking Care

#vent ig #i wish i could #but unfortunately i havent had the occasion of sharing one of my interest with you in the past three months and when i did it didnt go as i #wanted and now we're supposed to talk through smalltalks except i dont know how to do those so im awkward as hell and unconsciously cut the #short and now im being hated (?) even tho that wasnt my intent #but i guess no matter how trustful i am i just look like a liar #and i cant even bring myself to care bc how am i supposed to explain myself when youre convinced what i say is a lie #we werent even supposed to be this close so sorry if im stiff. i tried to get along but i just cant #the never ending circle between 'i want to have ppl to interact with being alone to experience this world is exhausting and dreadful' and #'im not even remotely interested by any of you' #its different on tumblr bc i can curate my own experience & nobody comes @ me when i dont interact with them for days or weeks (BC IVE GOT #NOTHING TO SAY) and its okay and its normal and we dont have to do the 'hi how are you wyd' script every single time (sure we can check up #on each other once in a while but it doesnt become a script. it feels genuine.) #anyway. im so normal. i can def care about ppl that have never been as insane as me about something we both love(d at some point) #am pretty sure i developed 'i perceived you saying/thinking One(1) bad thing about me and now i dont care at all about your existence' as #a child as a coping mechanism but goddammit i feel like an asshole everytime it happened #i hate feeling apathetic #and i hate lying too so i cant just say shit to reassure them when i dont mean them #cant tell them im sorry about how my behavior is perceived when im so damn tired and would rather they disappear of my life

[reinabeestudio]

you stop shaving as a woman and people just dont know what to call you anymore huh

#you ever get so annoyed that you draw ur irl self instead of your epic swag yass slay pretty sona #i didnt stop shaving for any statement btw it just drains me to do it & i havent been in the mood for months LMAO #i think i'm so used to the comfort of being surrounded by ppl presenting however they want and calling themselves whatever #sometimes i forget how. binary everything still is where i live #note that aint trans btw. i was afab & i dont fully identify as that currently but i have no problem being called a girl #and due to Health Reasons(tm) i get hairier than one would consider 'normal' for a woman (among other things) #(listen we all know gender is a nuanced spectrum but im not in the mood to talk about it in the tags of my own blog lol) #that + short + fat + voice breaks sometimes + mostly wears 'gender neutral' clothing. been mistaken for a prebuscent guy sometimes #(i say 'gender neutral' but its just regular ass baggy shirts and pants/jeans. 💥) #and if y'know me personally youre prolly reading this like 'what'. and yeah thats my reality sometimes LMAO #and im spanish so things are Extra gendered >8'D #i dont even bother explainin my gender to family its just not worth it so i take the she/her and move on #usually i dont talk about these irl things bc whatever but it's starting to irritate me lol #like. do i have to fuckin shave just to not be misgendered. fuckin christ dude #i need to get my yearly haircut btw. i dont like long hair on myself. its getting warm & it makes me sweat i hate it 🧍‍♂️

[sea-buns]

the things my mind will do to NOT have to face the consequences of a traumatic story arc

"oh so and so died last week? and the new episode is tonight? hmm sounds like it'll be a good one...

.....y'know i've really been meaning to get into [absolute rabbit hole of a fandom]"

#it just feels like today should be a break week day #like my guy just passed LAST thursday and you want me to come back? for MORE? of what? that?? #yeah no i need another week to mentally prepare and then ill be right with you please and thank you #i never actually watch the rebroadcast in the mornings cuz it feels weird watching cr with the sun shining #but the thought of locking in for 4 more hours of stress tonight is not for me #so maybe ill catch it on yt and watch while i play sdv or something #yknow balance out the stress with a game that is deceptively stressful but in a different way lmao #plus i still havent finished the fhjy episode so. im busy lol #the fandom that my brain is trying to use as an excuse to miss the live btw is naddpod #ive been keeping up with dnd court cuz its just fun sillies that require none of my attention or brain power #so i havent gotten into a campaign yet but i think about it a lot. i know ill like it and thatll be the end of me #but anyway good luck tonight critters! #the temptation might have me idly popping into stream but heres to hoping no one else perishes! :'D #critical role #sea rambles

[nordicbananas]

alright goodnight everyone!! this post will be t he person of the day too

person of the day is everyone I talked to today. if u spoke with me I love you dearly. thank you for talkign to me :) and also vi especially for being sweet (as usual <3)

yayayay I'm very glad I got my new pinned. I like it a lot!! and I hope to actually utilize my tagging system.

oli please consider going to bed soon. it's late. early. both at the same time. go to bed <3333

ummmm yea. OH I get to do nothing tomorrow ehrehrhrh....

#expect rather me going wild or silence #except for interactions. #no matter how inactive I am I will respond to asks and non-tag game tags don't worry guys #even if it's me going 'IM SORRY I GOT UR ASK I LVEO YOU BUT I HAVENT ANSWERED IT YET DJFSERYEHR' #wait I still love tag games just usually I dont do them. idk why. but. #tag me in whatever you want I would actually implode #idk what I'm saying I've finally reached internal incoherence #DID I JSUT SPELL THAT RIGHT FIRST TRY OMG #I mean.. I did get fourth place in my uhhh elementary school spelling bee.... #I lost with 'disinfectant'. #but the good thing is that I can always spell disinfectant now #disinfect the ant. the ant likes i's. #I said that so many times to myself while trying to memorize how to spell disinfectant omg #I will forget my own name before I forget D I S I N F E C T A N T #I can rattle those letters off like skittles talking about the fun facts they've learned you don't understand #I should go to bed. #GOODNIGHT <33 #--flower's bloom #TUMBLR PLEASE WHEN WILL YOU AUTO FILL THAT TAG. PLEASE. PLEASE. SOB

[inkats]

its actually stupid to be so down on my art ive been drawing for like. 5 years. only. and look at how much better ive gotten. everyone u compare urself to's been drawing for over a decade. youve got 5 years more. imagine what it'll look like then <33

#^saying this but really its that. ive so. lost the story part. lost the characters lost the ideas lost the creativity. #i got too into the grind i forgor what made art nice. #but then i also. Social Isolation 9000'd myself which might be part of it. #And i havent been reading i havent been reading gah. #i literally shouldnt be so sad i got into a uni i can actually go to on the other side of the country i should be overjoyed. theres light. #(i also got into nyu but. thats really impossible. 60000 dollars a year wgat was i thinking.) #i want. to draw tender love. and also stupid silly funny guys. but the melancholy too much of a boring bitch. #+ i think recently the down on myself + social isolation has made me want attention silly mode #(which. funfact. is actually why i started drawing i wanted attention) #and. well. that comes from social media. so numbers huh. #i have. people who like myart and are so nice to me that should be enough. even one person. but. alas. #anyway todays catboy might be a line drawing i think i need. A Break. from drawing To Improve. #and get back to drawing so i can see cute boys hugging and kissing and having love in their lives.

[milfygerard]

this is something ive seen a few times on my dash and i dont think ppl know this so i just wanna say that while its fun to joke about or even just discuss frank songs being about gerard a lot of the ones i see brought up frank has said are about like. his struggles with addiction (medicine square garden, veins veins veins) or complicated family situations (veins again, fantastic bastards tho not confirmed to be abt frank at all) idk i just want ppl who maybe didnt known to like know that

#barry.txt #this post is worded so strangely sorry #also FB isnt confirmed to be abt franks life it could be fictional or about d*wees. i know it has the ft willz quote but i think #they just lifted that bc its a great line and makes for a great chorus #veins veins veins and medicine square esp bother me bc i feel like franks struggles w addiction get sort of ignored or pushed to the side #despite being a very very present theme in his work #it kinda goes w his chronic illness and non gerard relationships as things that go kinda ignored when analyzing/discussing his songs #also i did just take ritalin. and its making me very chatty and ive wanted to talk abt this for awhile #i also do think it creates a very....idk what to say except fanficcy idea of what frank and gerards connection and friendship actually Were #this all kinda goes for the ft willz poetry as well tbh. i love thinking abt it and also love living in these #bitches discogd rent free jokes but its clearly aslo discussing franks chronic illness and struggles w touring and his relationship w his #wife #sorry oh my god. i wrote so much. its not that big a deal ive just thought abt this and havent said anything in so long #that i ended up having way more to say than needed #also im not mad at anyone for posting abt this we do not know these guys and these guys probably barely care #just. my brain. thats it lol

[bogos-bint3d]

Oooooooo you wanna find me great incredible Undyne centric content that I haven't seen before and will be consumed by ooooooooooo

#i say this because you genuinely cannot understand just how insane over her i am that i have legitimately seen almost all the interesting- #-content about her #i am not fucking kidding #if its on like the first 3 pages of anywhere ive searched for her ever. i have seen it. tumblr youtube ao3 google i HAVE SEEN!!!!!!! #ok well not as much with ao3. simply because im always searching for something specific on there. so like. there probably will be some- #-really good things on there i havent seen yet #but still. i have very high standards if there is anything I don't like ill spontaneously combust #and im legitimately like 94% i know literally every single thing about her mentioned in the game. so you wont be able to surprise me with- #-anything there either. but also you never really know so #i mean yeah just feel free to talk to me about her at any time. I wont be able to start the conversation. because like i just cant #but if you mention something interesting enough in the first sentence ill probably be able to keep the conversation going for a good while #sorry i probably sound really rude and snobbish rn cause im all like ''ugh i already know everything im so smart'“ #''whatever show me will be beneath me'' BUT I SWEAR THAT IS NOT HOW IM TRYING TO COME OFF #IM REALLY REALLY SORRY I JUST GENUINELY DO NOT KNOW HOW TO GET ACROSS HOW I N E E D IT TO BE SOMETHING NEW AND SOMETHING THAT ILL REALLY- #REALLY WANT TO SEE #IM SO SO SORRY I HATE THAT I SOUND SO RUDE HERE I JUST. like guys i just really want to see something new‚ something thatll make me happy. #sigh #okokok. #all good guys #uhm. yeah. maybe if you find something maybe tell me but also idk because what if i already know about it then dont know what to say. i just #i j . i dont even know man #ok im done #undyne

[hearties-circus]

I kinda feel like I've just hard erased any happiness or elation I had from being done with school all just so I wouldnt get asked a stupid question anymore I hate this I hate this

#gamer txt. #not once have i actually fucking wanted to go to college this was just the only way to make ppl stop asking me about jobs #but im realising now that was a stupid decision and i hate that i made it i hate tgat i had the chance to back out and didnt #the only thing that made school worth it before was my friends that was the only time id get to see them #now im going back to school completely without them like a fucking idiot #i know college is different from highschool i get that and i do want to learn fab weld but fuck me this was dumb #i know damn well im not going to make any new friends during this course im more terrified of people than ive ever been #and i stick out from my class like a sore thumb #whats worse is my nervousness from this has started fucking with my appetite and hunger and that is the worst possible thing it could do #that is like the number one way to break me #im already in such a vulnerable state i do not need constant fucking reminders of trauma i cant fucking escape #and im meant to just be normal and be a person and go to class on monday? #im this close 👌 to just dogging it. im pretty sure ill be getting the train in like i could full well just fuck off and leave #its not like they have my mums number she wouldnt know any different from what i told her #can i not just stay in the purgatory of being a teen old enough to be done with school but young enough to not have a job forever ? #please? im not ready for this im not i couldnt be less ready for this why did i let myself succumb to this pressure? i hate it #g-d i havent cried in. months now. this feels so. this is too much this is way too much fot me i cant do this #i dont know how i thought i could when the hell have i ever been able to do something like this on my own #theres nothing to me on my own i dont have any confidence i dont have any strength i need my friends for that and i dont have them

[rxtgallows]

being the same age as most long term lolitas were when they started getting into it but its different now bc there is just so much less of a community it feels like... like for me i feel more like i am finding a lot of individuals but no local communities bc its just rlly died down i think... like i found a 2013 pph article about a lolita meetup downtown. i dont think that wld happen now even if i COULD find a local community

#i think if theres not a lolita tea party/panel this year at pcm i will host one next year... #by then ill have been actively in the subculture for like a year and ill know a little more.. rn im JUST starting out i wld have no clue #what to do... but like i have ideas for stuff that wld be soo fun and ive always wanted to host/participate in an event or panel #once i was picked to participate in the fandom state alchemist test or w/e its called but then they wldnt let me after they saw my boot #which was so fail bc i absolutely cld have done tthe challenges with a broken foot. BLAH anyway #or like i hope they try the jfashion show again UGH probably not since it had to be cancelled due to lack of participation... #i jst would looove to have lolita friends in the area... idk how successful i wld be at converting someone and my sibling doesnt count #or ONE lolita friend... i only know of one lolita in maine and shes pretty well known in the NA lolita community from what i can tell so #ive met her a couple times actually she is very nice. idk what i am trying to say tbh #im more open to making friends at pcm in a lolita context and not a cosplay context bc every cosplayer ive interacted with for more than a #passing comment or picture turned out to be like umm a freak #or one of my moms students <- student who made all the dresses for the haunted town tour cosplaying kanaya that one year and then me showin #my mom the meetup pictures and her going omg.... thats d/////// #she was a really really incredibly seamstress btw her costumes were beautiful. anyway. iconic. #i think probably i havent talked to anyone in a while and it is wearing me down i have to make these massive posts every day