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wen-kexing-apologist · 4 months

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7 Days Before Valentine Ep 6: Stray Thoughts

Sunshine

First of all, Sunshine, @respectthepetty and I are on the way, we've got bats with your name carved in them, so I'd advise you to start running.

Sunshine is one of the characters I hate the most this year, especially as a main character/protagonist. But I do think they are doing an incredible job with his characterization in that this is a man with no one in his life, he doesn't interact with his parents, he has no friends, and based off the way he behaves you can tell exactly why. This is the most impulsive, self-absorbed man I've seen in quite some time.

Sunshine reminds me of the guys in my life I've known who are deeply in need of help, but turn everything in to a joke and absolutely, willfully refuse to talk about anything real. Sunshine absolutely, willfully refuses to pause for long enough to actually think about how terrible of a person he is and how much he is harming those around him as a result of that.

I don't even think Sunshine knows what he wants. He had a chance in his previous wish to just completely try again, in the best possible scenario where marriage equality has been passed and Rain doesn't know who he is, Sunshine has a clean slate, but that isn't good enough, so he ruins society, and that doesn't work, so he hurts Rain in the most fundamentally cruel way by removing his best friend from existence. Sunshine is hurting Rain so that he can be in a relationship with Rain, which is all I need to know to decide that Rain and Sunshine better not fucking end up together in this.

The Flowers

gif by @save-the-data

Okay, I don't know why, but the way Jared talks about his flowers is making me this of this book I read years ago called Daughter of Smoke and Bone where the main character is like living in the real world but has connections to this other fantasy world, and she goes to her friend to make wishes (for example, she wishes that her hair would naturally grow blue) and she only learns way later that every time she makes a wish the wish is paid for with (I think?) someone's tooth. And she realized that people, creatures, etc had died or been tortured to have their teeth removed so that she could make silly little wishes.

I don't know that I want this, I don't know what it would do or what it would say, but for some reason I cannot get it out of my head that these flowers with names that Jared talks about so lovingly are actual people's souls. Especially after that one rose fucking screamed when Sunshine dropped it.

Metaphors

gif by @save-the-data

The back half of last episode and the first half of this episode were really heavy on the theme of conformity. And I don't think I have a lot of words for it right now, but it is feeling very much like metaphors for externalized/internalized homophobia and the closet. Like how the little girl draws this picture of herself in a pink dress and writes SOS, while walking neatly in a line, in the same boring uniform as all the rest of the kids. Like the vibrant ecclectically dressed property manager, also choosing to conform when she goes out in public because she doesn't want to be stared at. Like the busker getting hauled away/punished by the police for breaking free from society's order. Like Jared, bright, happily, bubbly, and (in my opinion) visibly queer man being terrified of being hauled away to be "corrected". And this is all stemming from snap decisions Sunshine is making out of petty bullshit with almost zero intelligent thought behind his wishes.

How I want this to end

gif by @pharawee

I think I want Sunshine to wish Q away from existence. Q's job is very clearly weighing on him, and he deserves rest. For fuck's sake, his clothing gets darker every episode Sunshine needs to accept that Rain is gone from him, that he fucked up and can't go back, and I do not want Rain getting together with someone that really seems to disregard the harm he is causing.

Anyway, I am really enjoying this show, but it is slow as fuck and if it wasn't filmed, written, and structured like a play I don't think I would have had as high a tolerance for it's pacing.

#7 days before valentine #7dbv

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atanx · 4 months

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Since I've been replaying Subnautica recently, I've been thinking more about Below Zero.

From what I've seen, people tend to give Below Zero more shit than I think it deserves. Now, out of the two games I would very much say that Subnautica is my favourite, but I think comparing the two games is a bad idea in general because of how fundamentally different they are.

The premise of Subnautica is that you're a janitor whose spaceship crashed on an alien planet, leaving you as the only survivor when you wake up 8 hours after the crash. You aren't prepared for this. You're all alone. And you have been infected by a bakteria with a killcount in the billions. You know nothing at all about this world. This sets up real terror, helplessness and the knowledge that even if someone were coming to save you, they would experience the same fate as the rest of your ship's crew. You're not stranded on 4546B BY CHOICE.

Below Zero however, is drastically different. You have gone to great lengths to willingly smuggle yourself onto the planet to find out just what happened to your sister to cause her death. You come very much prepared and you're more than willing to face all the risks. You can also theoretically leave at any point. All you'd have to do is show yourself to Alterra and they would probably escort you to a prison themselves. You do not get infected. You are also not alone.

This willingness and initiative in Below Zero is a huge detractor from the terror of it all. And it is why I think a comparison is unfair.

(Also, you have a Truck. In Below Zero. And Truck-kun is there, ready to deal massive damage for you! Honestly I think it's way too OP. Fucking Shadow Leviathans become nothing more than a NUISANCE. But well, it fits with the theme of the game.)

All in all, Below Zero had nice environments, nice creatures, nice gameplay, a better base building system and some pretty intruiging storylines!

In my opinion, the endgame is pretty lacklustre. Any terror I felt regarding leviathans or the like abated very quickly, even though I have barely 30h in Below Zero. Meanwhile, going to the Aurora in Subnautica still scares the shit out of me 80h in.

Although I have to mention here that some of the familiarity you build up in Subnautica carries over. You can never get the same experience as playing Subnautica for the first time ever again. Because now you've already experienced it once.

Below Zero isn't really a worse game for not being able to do this, though. It's a good game, it's just... not as memorable. Because Subnautica is truly special. From its stellar soundtrack to its satisfying gameplay and moving story and setting, Subnautica is a fucking masterpiece. Sure, it has its flaws, but they're more charming than detracting. To me.

And it's unfair to expect anything else to deliver the same experience. Because nothing can.

And when comparing Below Zero to Subnautica, so many cool things lose their shine in its shadow. I still vividly remember jamming out in the seatruck to Diving In Too Deep from Nerdout. The story of that one old wreck that managed to survive by distracting the big gun was some really good writing. The frozen leviathan terrified me so hard even though I knew it wasn't going to come alive. Robin and Al-An's conversations are genuinely interesting an entertaining. The kelp area is really cool and the oxygen flowers are such a good gameplay change! Sam's storyline hit me right in the feels! MARGUERIT. The ice worm hit me straight off of my snowfox and down a cliff so I had to run the rest of the way. The research crew are also lovely characters!

There are a lot of things to love about Below Zero and we shouldn't let them pale by judging the game with standards Subnautica lifted to the fucking moon <3

#subnautica #below zero #atanx.txt #yes im aware bz came out like 2 yrs ago but ive been replaying subnautica and its just BEEN ON MY MIND SO MUCH AHHHH #also this is tumblr so who cares #and if you havent played the game(s) and somehow stumbled on this post: theyre really worth it #and i havent really spoiled much of anything #SO GO PLAY IT its so much better when ur playing it blind!!#if you have to choose one go with subnautica tho because its just so good #lolol the whole point of this post was to say dont compare the two yet choosing between them is a comparison of sorts XD #hey i never claimed i was consistent :P #but fr i love the characters in Subnautica. my little blorbos <3 theyre all dead but hey! fanfiction exists :333 #THE SOUNDTRACK IS SO GOOD AKCKQLC IT GAVE ME FEELS AND THEN I WROTE THIS POST

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twisted-wonderland-but-gayer · 1 year

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I came across a post you made about Yuu leaving to go to RSA and seeing Adeuce triggering a panic attack and I thought I might share my own take on it.

I have a Yuu that has really bad PTSD, trust issues and depression as a result of the overblots. They want absolutely nothing to do with the Octavinelle trio, the students of Scarabia and Rook and Vil (those three chapters are the ones that I am the most salty about).

Since Azul made them homeless, took away the only family and comfort they had in twst (Ramshackle and its ghosts) and sent the twins to terrorize them when Yuu tried to get their home back, Yuu doesn't trust a single cell in that octopus' body and whenever they see the octovinelle trio they just look the other way and try to escape without saying a word (it literally filled them with disgust when they had no choice but ask them for help with the Scarabia incident but it was that or suffer through getting kidnapped and locked up against their will)

I've read a few fics where Yuu collapses due to heat stroke when they were forced to take part in the sand marches and as someone with anemia that has fainted quite a few times in their life (and let me tell you, the first time I woke up after fainting and my eyes were wide open but all I could see was black for like five minutes - like I could hear and understand perfectly well but my body was limp and weak and I was surrounded by complete darkness even though the room was very well lit and it was a bright morning - I was terrified out of my mind) the idea of that happening in a place where you've been locked up and isolated in a hostile environment and knowing that you can't contact anyone because Jamil has isolated you from your friends would make their trauma even worse.

They can't step foot into Scarabia because every time they do, all they can remember was when they had a panic attack and bruised their hands as they banged on the door and begged and cried for someone to let them out - it's also the reason that they are now scared of the dark.

The worst part of it though - the day they had collapsed and was then locked up again was their birthday, a day that they had planned on spending with their Ramshackle family because they had no other family.

The basic guist of this Yuu is that they are so traumatised that they have zero trust in everyone because they don't know when other people would drop their mask and betray them the same way Jamil did. They know that the only reason the dorm leaders and dorm members are nice/respect them is because they are the ones that saved them from the overblots and they're kind of bitter that it took them nearly dying for them to be treated like a person and not some magicless nobody.

The only people they can stand to be next to are Ace and Deuce because they are the only people that actually stood up for them only because they liked them and not because they had to prove themselves (Deuce stood up for them during the grocery run and then Ace when Riddle insulted Yuu, Yuu's behaviour, Yuu's family and upbringing)

Also, sidenote, I really loved Ace in that scene. Riddle was taunting and insulting him and Ace was relatively calm about it but the second Riddle says a word about Yuu, he starts swinging. Also, notice how everyone blames Ace for throwing a punch for Yuu and how no one even cared that Yuu's feelings were hurt for no reason at all other than Riddle was on a power high - like Trey, buddy, this is what Ace meant when he said you were responsible for everything.

This Yuu is so broken that they can't sleep without having nightmares unless Adeuce are with them (they're like the human version of emotional support animals), that they break down sobbing when they see all of the scars that were caused by the overblots, that they feel phantom pains whenever they move, that they don't even go to adults because they can't be sure that they won't turn on them.

I just want Adeuceyuu and Grim just living in their own little bubble, living their us vs the rest of the school life, and just trying to help Yuu the best they can because NRC doesn't deserve them

YUU AND ADEUCE IN THEIR LITTLE BUBBLE GIVES ME IDEAS.

Maybe some power is awakened in Yuu and theyre kinda like Malleus where they do exactly that. Deuce Grim and Ace all taken away in their safe little haven as the rest of the world is shut out. Maybe Yuu kinda creates their own real./dimension in TWST in order to escape reality

#not writing #not requests #angst

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blackjackkent · 3 months

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OK time for yet another boss battle combat report!

(Everyone seemed to like the Iron Throne play-by-play so I guess I'm getting more thorough with these. XD )

We get to fight big boy, who i'm not referencing by name till under the cut, and his three lady friends from the other thrones, plus the three guards from the front door.

Sarevok is quite beefy - 206HP. Surprisingly, the guards from the front door are the other scary ones; That Which Guards has 236HP and the other two are 162. Amelyssan and her cronies are a much more reasonable 72, which means that they're our first targets to get off the field as quickly as possible.

springagainafter: hee hee I've been waiting for you to get to the bit where Sarevok shows up springagainafter: ghost Melissan too UGH springagainafter: PUNCH SAREVOK, HECTOR springagainafter: do it for Rasaad, it's what he would want XD blackjackkent: heeeeee blackjackkent: hell yeah

Let's see how well Team Juggernaut holds up to this challenge.

Minsc was able to open the fight by taking out Amelyssan at once. (He gets five attacks with Nyrulna on the first turn of the fight due to Dread Ambusher and Enraged Throw and he used them all on her.) I like to think that this was not actually strategy but just him zeroing in on her immediately as the person he hates second most on the field (but was most likely to kill quickly) and wanting her GONE.

I backed up out of combat for a bit so I could look at Sarevok's inspect screen and he's a spooky boy. Among his Exciting Features are: Legendary Resistance (unsurprising), Exceptional Plate (decreased physical damage), multiattack, bleed infliction on enemies with full health, and 20AC. Fundamentally, though, the scariest thing about him is that he has a number of equally scary friends and a lot of health, so we'll be better off taking the friends out of the equation fast. We've dealt with Steel Watchers, so as long as Sarevok doesn't start exploding, I'm not as worried as I was with them. XD

The three echoes also turn out to be primary targets because they cast Haste on Sarevok and Slow on our party, both of which are TERRIFYING in this context, so good to get them off the field as quickly as possible.

As the fight goes on, though, things get... interesting. Every time our boy Sarevok hits something he gets a stack of "Murderous Strikes", and when it hits 4 he can cast "Deathbringer's Legacy" which basically allows him to do a four-strike multihit. And when hastened he can get that VERY often.

On her second turn, Jaheira DISCONNECTS HERSELF FROM THE PARTY because she doesn't have time for my mediocre combat skills, casts Confusion on all three of the weird scary guards, and beelines straight for Sarevok like a house on fire entirely without my input.

CORRECTION: The above point seriously confused me through quite a few reloads and I couldn't figure out what was causing it bc it only seemed to happen sometimes. Turns out that one of the Big Scary Guards cast "Compelled Duel" on her, which I think broke her out of my control briefly even though it's supposed to just prevent her from attacking anyone other than the caster. And then I think her casting Confusion caused the control to drop (when the BSG failed its save) but didn't put her back in the party.

I like my interpretation better, though, that she's so pissed off with Sarevok that she doesn't have time for my bullshit.

Honestly Hector's brute force punching is carrying the day. (The spirit of Rasaad moves within him indeed.) His second turn he got a starting topple on Sarevok and melted him for a total of [does hasty math] A HUNDRED AND FORTY FIVE DAMAGE. My boy is a guided missile and we love that for him! This build is so broken oh my god, Zen. XD

Looking more closely at the Big Scary Guards, I noticed this:

This is good news actually and means we probably don't have to kill them, just keep them from killing US long enough to deal with Sarevok.

Having finally, after a number of confused reloads, figured out what was going on with Jaheira, it was time to bring out the owlbear to smack Sarevok around, and leave Karlach in the back to deal with the BSGs. Four owlbear claw hits in a row for ~22 damage each is spicy, plus each of them does knockback, which gives us the incredibly satisfying image of Sarevok Anchev bouncing across the floor like an errant ping-pong ball.

Eventually we whittled him down! The BSGs, as expected, despawned when Sarevok died, and we just had to clear out the remainder of the echoes in order to finish the fight.

Yasssss. SAREVOK ANCHEV IS NO MORE!

*loud cheering from Faenya-Dail*

I would damn well hope the Murder Tribunal are impressed after that display. XD

I didn't even know that was an option but I think I'm glad we didn't become whatever that is. XD

Excellent. That will be Thursday's project since I have raids tomorrow. XD

#bjk plays baldur's gate 3 #hector carlisle #late post lol this took forever plus i kept getting pulled away #but YESSSSSSS #eat it murder boy

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needle-noggins · 10 months

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clearly i'm in an analysis mood so i'll share my thoughts on the GHG scene in Trimax Volume 2, mostly Legato, that crazy son of a bitch.

First, there's something to be said about his wild Iron Lung set up. On my first read I thought it was more of a punishment from Knives for threatening Vash, but I guess it's also because his body is physically broken? And/or a way to curb his power? Either way, Legato is the definition of "jokes on you, I'm into that shit" because he's so extremely broken (in every sense of the word). There's a definite link between Legato's trauma and the fucked up little guy he is now but I don't know shit about shit so would not consider myself qualified to discuss it further. Please read madnessmadness's trigun bdsm post as a supplemental.

ok, this next panel made me gasp. It's not a needle-noggins analysis without religious symbolism, so here you go!

Vash is literally hanging upside down, arms splayed out on an upside down cross, when Legato talks about him. Like, okay pontius pilate!! I think Vash is upside down for two reasons, the obvious being that the reader can tell that Legato is talking about killing Vash (cool abstract blood splatter too, which kinda messes with the cross form and makes it less obvious) (but i see you nightow, you can't escape my catholic eyes). The second, is, well, the way that Peter was crucified - not right-side-up like good ol' Jesus. The story goes that Peter requested to be crucified upside down because he didn't deserve to die the same way as Jesus. Trigun muddles so many biblical references all at once that a direct correlation can't be made at any given time, but I think we can interpret this here as Vash being unworthy/not the savior in Legato's mind (to him that's Knives, ofc).

An upside-down crucifix now is also a satanic symbol, just like. Inverting Christianity. Obvious "these are the bad guys". But I think that's a much more common symbol in western culture than to Japanese so I'm not gonna read into that too much.

nothing to add here other than Midvalley is lowkey fine (like if Wolfwood got his shit together) and here we can see the internal conflict of the GHG. Nobody's doin' it like Legato's doin' it, and I wish Midvalley pulled that trigger (it's not his place though, but damn it sure would save Vash a lot of trouble).

Bring back Knives' bodycon bdsm dress, Stampede!!!

"engrave the futility of his cause into his every bone" jfc, Knives. I've said it earlier but Knives's attempt to show Vash "the true nature of [humanity]" backfires so hard because instead he just shows Vash the nature of his own being, the terrifying weapon that he is (cough fifth moon). Vash doesn't blame people at all for how they see him, because baby boy has absolutely zero self-esteem and far too much compassion. Meanwhile, Knives is still a proud, burnt out gifted kid who is terrified at his heart and he's going to make it everyone else's problem. Knives understands his brother so little that he doesn't see that his plan is just going to make Vash fight him harder. Knives is too blinded by his fear and disdain for humanity to even consider it. Zero compassion. Fantastic way to highlight the overarching themes of the story. (/hand-wavy "you get it, right?" motion)

Someone please get Legato a napkin and explain to him that Knives is not God. Something something horrible deeds being done in the name of God's "will"; Trimax is both showing us space Jesus as our beloved self-sacrificing protagonist while also warning us against blind faith in a vengeful God, etc etc. It's my Trigun book club analysis and I get to choose the biblical symbolism to fit the way I hate modern Christianity!

#trimax spoilers #trigunbookclub #sorry for popping off with this one re: religion if you come for my throat about it i will simply laugh #bc my relationship with religion is complicated and i dont care if you think im bad at it #i didnt go to catholic school from K-8th to NOT overanalyze the biblical references in my favorite space western anime #dont be weird on this post ok?#but do be weird if we're going to talk more about Legato's kink shit #bc im very much uneducated on that topic in general lol

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tobiasdrake · 6 months

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Sneaky-snakin' my way back to the lab, and trusting none of my friends. THIS IS FINE.

Thinking about it, I realized something. Shinigami said we should keep Fubuki and Vivia's abilities in mind but didn't necessarily say they're complicit in the crime.

I may have been onto something when I was musing on Fubuki. Neither of their powers allow them to do things but both of their powers allow them to know things.

I've been circling this idea that Yakou might, himself, be our killer. Yakou may have been the person who did not beat the gas chamber. He may be dying of the poison, with his stabbing (by Jawline?) masking the cause of death.

If that is true, it's possible that Vivia and Fubuki know. Vivia's been saying that solving this case doesn't matter because it won't help us in any way. I've been under the impression that he means "Yomi doesn't give a shit about the truth so what will it matter?"

But if Yakou killed Huesca? And Vivia knows? Then "The truth won't help us" takes on a completely different meaning. Because. Like. That means we did it. Yomi's decided apropos of nothing that we did it. That's why we're in this mess. If we in fact did it, that's not helpful information for our predicament.

Fubuki's been practically catatonic since we found Yakou's corpse. She's barely said anything substantive. She may have found out what Yakou allegedly did in time loops we didn't get to see. As a matter of fact, the first thing she's contributed at all since we reached this room was volunteering to come with us and find the security logs.

If she knows? Halara might have saved us from having Fubuki save-scum the destruction of evidence behind our back.

...there is a non-zero possibility that Fubuki has already save-scummed the destruction of evidence behind our backs.

This is tense.

Yeah, these two chuckleheads. Fortunately, they seem to be distracting themselves by searching for more bankable eBay loot. Police corruption sure is convenient sometimes.

Shit! Yuma kicked a can. Unlike Huesca, these guys aren't deaf, which makes sneaking around this room tricky.

Sure would be nice if we had our time-rewinding (and possibly evidence-destroying) bestie right now, WOULDN'T IT!?!?

HOLD UP, we may or may not have murdered the doc but I'd hardly call that--

Oh. Right. The bombing attacks. Yeah, okay, Terrorist Detective is an apt title. Well. We're doing this all by our lonesome so. Um. Don't suppose I could bribe you guys to look the other way?

I. Have. No money. But I can pay you in debt to Halara. I'm flush with that! It's like accepting a bribe only backwards!

VIVIA YOU SWEET BEAUTIFUL MAN YOU.

What did I say? What did I fucking say!? There is no problem-solving resource more valuable than another goddamn human being!

Man, if we get out of this, I promise to carry your casket!

...unless you're here to obstruct the investigation because you don't want me finding out what Yakou did. In which case, I hope you live to be 1,000.

That is absolutely terrifying and I would like you to not elaborate, nor ever bring it up again.

Also, please dispose of it and acquire a new syringe. It's been used. Don't share needles.

...those guys on the floor shared that needle. But they're fascists so fuck 'em.

Oh, he does not, Shinigami. We both know that Vivia rarely does any walking. He's been more vertical in this one case than he has since we met him.

He knows. He's not uninterested in the truth of this case. He's aware of it. That's why he keeps saying it won't help us. He knows what Yakou allegedly did.

Thank goodness for lazy assholes. Huesca was exactly the kind of person to be like, "I'm the only person who can even access this room without dying horribly. What's the point of locking my computer? It's an inconvenient nuisance!"

Well, this is the point, asshole. Now outsider spies can easily access your data. I'm in your lab committing corporate espionage because you didn't want to spend half a second jamming out 8 digits of keystrokes.

My home laptop is more secure than the most confidential research console that our Corporate Overlords possess. Do you know what they call that? Hmm?

They call it entirely realistic. Our digital security is a shitshow. Every leader in both the political and corporate hierarchies should be ashamed of themselves.

But Huesca checked that while we were on the comm with him, and he said that security never faltered.

Yeah, we know that. Let's look for things we don't know. Otherwise we wasted a perfectly good syringe full of what might be sedatives but, knowing Vivia, there is an equal possibility that he killed those two guys.

Right. That's about three months ago, when that one scientist was tasked to bring Huesca his shipment of food supplies. Yakou/Jawline/Fink was not hiding in this room for 90 days. Absolutely not.

This isn't new information. It corroborates what we already knew. The killer didn't deactivate the security features. They either got around them or went through them.

There has to be more here.

Never crossed my mind that the logs could have been tampered with, but it might have crossed someone's so it's good to close that avenue off.

This might have something to do with Huesca's plan to flee the city. He had an arrangement with someone to get him out. That might be what Jawline was doing here. Or it could be what Yakou was doing here.

Either one of them could have been trying to save Huesca, rather than kill him. That would especially click with Yakou's behavior earlier. He was adamant that we need to beeline it to the lab and take Huesca into custody.

So perhaps I had Yakou right the first time. After causing a distraction to buy us an opening to reach Huesca, Yakou tried to hunt down Fink the Slaughter Artist and take him down. He lost the fight because he is a stick figure doodled on the label of a beer bottle, and that's how he ended up where he was.

That could make sense of why he was here. One way or another, this all connects to a personal motive. The woman in the picture. But it wouldn't explain why the letter was sent to our sub to begin with. Also, while the killer could have waded through the gas chamber and accepted death, that still wouldn't explain how they bypassed the--

No. No, Yakou could bypass the panel room if he had Fubuki to help him. I said before that the only way we knew of to beat the Panel Room is temporal brute-force, which the killer couldn't have done. But if the killer was Yakou, then he could have beaten the panel room the same way we did.

So maybe the person on the other end of this message was Jawline. He attacked Yakou to protect Huesca, but was too late to stop it. Maybe.

But. That still doesn't work. Huesca was alive when we reached the intercom. We separated from Yakou, with him going the opposite direction while we bee-lined it to the lab. There's no way Yakou could have gotten past us then, and Fubuki was with us at that time.

Oh, Huesca wanted out 'cause he's been committing corporate espionage. I want to be surprised by this but I'm not.

Okay, dude on the other end probably isn't Yakou. But they may have hired Jawline as a silencer, to keep Huesca from ever talking about what they've been doing here. That would explain why a hitman was sent in the first place. But if it's as straightforward as that, why the uncharacteristic death threat letters?

Oh yeah, this guy definitely sent Jawline. Or is Jawline. Or something.

Well, now we know why Jawline was here.

I thought he was talking about some kind of conspiracy to undermine him. But this now suggests espionage was the cryptic topic.

Someone at Amaterasu. I suggested before that if Yakou's our killer, he could have sent the letters to pin the blame on the famous hitman Fink. But if Jawline is the man that Huesca was working with, he could have done it for the same reason.

On that note, we cannot prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that Makoto isn't Jawline but. C'mon. There is no way he has a rounded, muscular jaw. This man weighs 45 kg/152.6 Furbies. A stiff breeze would carry him away.

Huesca's been selling company secrets since before Makoto even arrived. Wow. Six months ago would be enough time for the food shipment 90 days ago to be messed with in some way. But we already know the killer hasn't been chilling in the lab for 90 days.

He could also be the hitman. We can't be certain Fink the Slaughter Artist was ever here.

Oh, hey! Uh. Hi, again. *glances at computer* Yeah. This. Uh. This is exactly what it looks like. I'm not even going to try and bullshit you.

I like to think of myself as a carefully placed thumbtack on your chair.

Suppose it's time for Mystery Labyrinth, then. There's no getting out of this otherwise.

Ha! Shinigami can possess the doc's body once this is all settled. Huesca himself can suddenly stand up and explain, "This is how I was killed, thank you!" and then fall back down. That'd be even funnier than when the killer does it.

I'm gonna hold you to that. When I get back to the sub, I expect to see Kokohead Sewage opened up on the map.

Kurumi will be super jealous. She's never pissed off the Peacekeepers enough to have a waste treatment facility named after her.

#master detective archives: rain code #drake plays rain code

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autisticandroids · 1 year

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cliff notes:

- everybody loves a clown notable miss from john shiban. NOT a good ep

- i've rewatched bloodlust so i have less thoughts, however: hey amber benson and rachel miner have kind of similar voices huh 😳🥴

- oh so children shouldn't play with dead things is about the THEMES huh. love it when dean came back wrong ❤️ he's a walking corpse ❤️

- i liked simon said :) you can tell it's the first edlund because of its charm and also because it has zero grasp on consent whatsoever. sam worrying that maybe he's eeeeevil didn't even harsh my mellow that's how much i liked this ep

- i didn't hate no exit actually! the misogyny is unpleasant but the shakeup of jo being there is honestly worth it. it's really fun to see them actually hunt a case with someone else, not hurriedly inducting a terrified civilian or like, working with their dad, or teaming up for a big season ender, but just busting a normal-ass ghost with another hunter. the only other time that's happened so far is in home with missouri and it was also really good there. i would also like to have lingered a little more on the idea that john caused bill's death by screwing up. i was thinking earlier about dean saying that john doesn't make mistakes or leave hunts unfinished in something wicked and how crazy that is, the kind of deranged deification it points to. i think that would obviously have changed due to dean's new perspective on john but i would like to see it play out please. i want to sit with that, to watch him process it. oh well you win some you lose some

- HUGE fan of the usual suspects being a human perpetrator that fucks. also i wish the theme of salmondean being on the run from law enforcement had stuck around for longer in the show it was like so good. also: liked the cop lady

- crossroads blues: finally some listenable music instead of the butt rock crap this show normally pays through the nose to license. the first half is really solid, the artist who sold his soul in particular is really compelling and i wish we had spend more time with him. the creature design of the hellhounds is of course absolutely stunning, a great example of spooky spn minimalism, but my favorite part was actually the cold open where we see that from the outside, the person being ripped apart by hellhounds appears to simply be having a seizure. the guy who sold his soul for his wife was nothing though. i know it's about themes but they should have saved the artist instead. that guy's lackluster performance makes the whole back half of the episode worse, although dean interacting with the crossroads demon is INSANE. she calls him edible <3

- and lastly croatoan. i really liked it :3 it's very funny that they're worried about sam being evil when dean is just straight up murdering people. he came back wrong <3. sarge is also a standout side character for the season. his whole meeting with dean, the "what's going on with everybody" part, is like, just really really fun and a standout for me. also dean's craziness... yes babygirl kill yourself about it. they managed to cram both the sibling crazy and the general crazy into one bottle quite succintly

#spn #suicide tw

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memento-morri-writes · 1 year

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new WIP dropped??????please tell me

e v e r y t h i n g

also narrated by a Raven???? I'm so :ooo

have a good day/ night!

(@ink-fireplace-coffee)

hehehe, it's the one I mentioned a little while ago, somewhere on my blog as "high fantasy wip". I described the vibes as "Six of Crows mixed with a DnD campaign."

The problem is that I have no plot, other than that first little inciting incident that I mentioned. And I don't really have the other characters solidified yet either. This WIP is really me just trying to come up with my ideal book based on my current interests, lmao. So maybe my interests will change before I ever finish it, but idk. I just think we need more found family fantasy stories, and as of right now, most of the found family stuff I've read has been YA centered. Which is fine, but adults deserve some too, right??

(a lot of this is going to be repeated from this ask I answered for @rose-bookblood, but I'm going to add a lot more too.)

Anyways, I'll try and tell you some more! I'll list the character ideas I have right now:

Avidra (Avi): they/them, elf of some sort, former assassin, like 127 years old. (but their species isn't considered "adult" until they're 100 years old.)

Asra: she/her, human, in her 20's, talented thief.

Brynn: she/her, trans, human, late 20's or early 30's, former pit fighter??

Orion: he/him. Not-quite-human sorcerer with a talent for fire. Going through his gifted kid burnout arc.

Healer/nature mage who thinks they have to save everyone, and haunted by the one time they couldn't. (pronouns tba)

A warlock who made a deal with an entity years ago and is now terrified of being possessed by said entity.

(by the way, you should know that there are absolutely zero cishet characters in this story. everyone is queer somehow.)

Those last two characters I'm not settled on, but they're character concepts I love a lot, so we'll see what happens.

As for the raven narrator, uh, yeah. He works for the Raven Queen, who is this world's goddess of death. He's meant to collect people's souls when they die. He starts following the group after the death that happens on the first fucking page (here) and gets invested. In a weird way, he does care about the group, but also, he's an immortal collector of souls. He has a very matter-of-fact approach to death and such, and his way of "caring" or being interested doesn't necessarily mean he hopes they don't die. He just wants to see what they do before they die.

His narration is going to have footnotes, which are like his little comments or interjections. (these are in first person) I have a deep love for the use of footnotes in storytelling.

So, um, picture him as like, Death from The Book Thief mixed a bit with the narrator from The Nevernight Chronicles. Though in my mind, the best use of footnotes will always be The Bartimaeus Trilogy, which I highly recommend to anyone who hasn't read it! But also, throw in the 3rd omniscient-ness of Lemony Snicket in A Series of Unfortunate Events.

And I got this idea from falling head first into a hyper fixation with Critical Role. So, ummm.... this is going to be a wild ride. But if I can pull it off (or at the very least come up with a plot and develop the characters), I will be very, very happy and proud of myself.

Anyways, that's really everything I know about this story. Thanks for asking about it, Carmen!!! <33

#Anonymous #Morrigan replies #high fantasy wip #ink-fireplace-coffee #Carmen ☕

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sonic-rebellion-official · 2 years

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Infinite/zero or phantom ruby headcanons plz!

Oh this is the PERFECT thing to wake up to. I've been thinking a lot about him lately so it'll be nice to get a few things off my chest. Big wall of text under the cut, expect tons of angst ;]

I take the Forces prequel comics (Rise of Infinite) into consideration, meaning Zero was the leader of the Jackal Squad before he decided to become a war criminal. It's where I got the name Zero from, which is actually his canon name before he adopted "Infinite" as his identity.

I like to think that Zero and the Squad had been tight knit friends since they were kids. In a way they were like the siblings he never had, which makes the fact that they were killed all the more painfull.

When Zero agreed to work for Eggman, he only did it at first to protect himself and the Squad, which obviously went awry when the latter were slaughtered by a certain hedgehog, driving Zero into a fit of blind rage. It was only after he himself had been defeated by Shadow that he finally subjected himself to experimentation with the Phantom Ruby.

Once infused with the Ruby, he felt no different other than the fact that he could now create terrifying illusions that reflected his targets' worst nightmares. After some time, however, he began to feel like his mind was being alterred by something sinister. It turns out that the Ruby had malicious intents to cloud his judgement in order to reach its full potential.

Up until then, Zero had been skeptical about what he was being told to do, and felt that it was wrong to carry out Eggman's orders. He had only been doing it to save his own hide, as I've said, and he really did not like the idea of being practically hypnotized by a gemstone to follow the doctor's bidding mindlessly.

After capturing and imprisoning Sonic, Zero had been ordered to get answers out of him by any means possible. This meant subjecting the poor thing to torture, but Zero had stopped to tell Sonic that he was only doing this for his own safety, to which the hedgehog reluctantly understood. It made his experience there less horrid than it would have been.

It turns out that using the Ruby's powers encouraged it to become more active, and to Zero's dismay that meant that using his new abilities came with the cost of his own mind. He became filled with hatred that wasn't even his as time went on, until he was finally consumed by the Ruby and became the Infinite we know from Forces.

After his final defeat, Zero became trapped in Null Space to rot and wither away. It was there when he finally came to, realieing what he had done and regretting it wholey. He spent weeks in there alone with his own thoughts, which was far from healthy for his mental being, convincing himself that he was the scum of the earth and didn't deserve to live on.

One fateful day he was suddenly ripped from Null Space by an uknown entity, dragging him back to reality. It was there that he met everyone's favorite Eggman obsessor, Starline. The platypus had taken it upon himself to find the jackal and rerecruit him back into the Empire's army, but after taking a look at the state of him, he ultimately decided against it.

Zero vowed that he would get his revenge against Eggman at all costs, biding his time so that he could regain his strength. It was during that time that he began a road to accidental self-discovery, but he was held back by the chains of trauma.

He had discarded his mask and shed himself of the name Infinite, disgusted with himself over how many horrible things he'd accomplished. Still, he was horribly self-conscious about his own face, allowing himself to cover it even slightly with a bandana. He still gets worked up when someone calls him weak or useless, which reminds him that after he's done having his way with Eggman, he'll be coming for the one person that ruined his life to begin with: Shadow the Hedgehog.

Regardless of all that, I wanna take the time to talk about his personality traits a bit more: Zero is very introverted and hates conversing with people. When he does, he can come off as rude and uninviting, but in reality he just doesn't know how to make basic social interactions (he's just like me fr...). He does have a soft side; it just takes forever for him to let himself show it. As for the ruby, it's still present - just very weak and unable to form basic illusions. It was drained of all its power after transporting Zero to Null Space.

I don't wanna put down anymore since it'd go into spoiler territory for my fic, but this is still a LOT to write down. I should be in the shower but hey, I couldn't resist. Hope you enjoy!

#sonic the hedgehog #sonic rebels au #zero the jackal #infinite the jackal #asks #headcannons and backstories

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nerdyporcelain · 1 year

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°THE ABANDONED°

Okay, so my character almost died last session.

Our group and a guest player were sent on a mission to retrieve information about a transport of 30 statues (they are a mischievous thing of the past world in this setting) that was coming to town. We go there and it's a shack full of big ass crates with some random kids at the guard and three more people inside. We lure the kids away, because there's no point in fighting them and after our barbarian, Gotylda, gets brought inside after some unsuccessful seduction attempts, we go in to rescue her, guns blazing.

Now, it was a sturdy building with no windows and no way in other than the front door, so after four attempts at getting in peacefully or stealthily, we decided to fuck it, we ball. My character swings the doors open with thaumaturgy and the combat begins. After some rounds my cleric successfully brings down the Tabaxi, which just so happens to be the wife of the 'main boss' of this encounter, Captain Amarena. After seeing her love die she naturally zeroes in on Licricia, super ficking enraged (our DM loves Undertale so it could've gone two ways).

Fast forward and she fires three attacks at my girl with her great crossbow, and they all fucking hit. Our characters are only lvl 5 at this point, and DM rolls very high damage, so the second shot brings Licricia the fuck down. After that, Captain deals the damage from the last shot and two of my death saving throws automatically fail. If it wasn't enough, I'm next in the innovative, so it's time for my (possibly) last saving throw. I had inspiration so I was prepared to re-roll the dice if need be. Thankfully, I rolled a 15 and a healing potion from our guest Rogue that went next patched her back up to 6 hp before I could roll any more DST's.

For me personally it was fucking stressful (I was shaking, felt sick, couldn't look into anybody's eyes and couldn't feel my fingers) because Licricia is a character that I hold very close to my heart, I've been building her existence in my head for almost a year and half that long in the game. She's my first dnd character that's been given this much life, but her story is just beggining, so grieving her loss would be absolutely heartbreaking to me. I know if I asked, our DM would do everything in her might (that would fit the narrative) to let the players try to bring her back, and she doesn't usually try to kill us off on purpose (that being said I actually really enjoyed the aspect of a crazed lover trying to avenge her wife, very relatable). However, it still would leave the possibility of failure and ultimately having to say goodbye to my beloved character, which is scary as hell.

Now, Licricia on the other hand was fucking terrified because of couple things. One, obviously, being that she almost fucking died, and that hadn't happened in like ten years (she's 47), and that alone is freaking scary. Two, as a Death Domain Cleric she can sometimes hear the dead (something funky I came up with and DM agreed to), especially freshly after they died, or if their spirit is tied to some place. It manifests in various ways, but this time, after all the fighting has been done and Amarena died, Licricia heard a meeting between their souls, like an unexpected greeting between loved ones after years, overwhelmingly lovely in the face of death. The DM described to me that Licricia feels overwhelming sense that they have something that she won't, not in a while anyway.

Now that, that was just the most perfect cherry on top of a character insight that I've been slowly baking.

Licricia had lost her lover, Ophelia, in a rouse roughly ten years ago. She watched her get hanged and could do nothing about it, except for running away and disappearing from society for eight years. She lived through her grieve long and hard, harbouring pain and loss and learning how to live without her other half. It was the hardest period of time in her long, painful life, and when she came out at the other end of it eight years later, she believed herself to be okay. She met people and cought meaningless crushes, she trusted some for a while, she got betrayed like so many times before, she lived on. And she truly believed herself to be content, to have made peace with Ophelia's loss.

But throughout the two years she's been back in the society she drunkenly looked for blue tieflings in the crowds, listened put for a gentle melody of a harp in city squares and subconsciously wondered what happened to the engagement ring that she ordered all those years ago, but never got to pick up. She always thought herself ready to die, because it was the most natural thing in the world, and it might be a chance for them to reunite, but now that she actually saw what it could look like, everything changed. Would she meet Ophelia like that, even though she died so many years ago? Would it be like meeting an old friend or would she be angry with her for not making it to that platform in time? For the first time in a long time she knew that not only does she not mind not dying, she doesn't want to die. She got reminded first hand actually how close death is and how scared she was of letting go. Shes always believed that she'll meet Ophelia once more, but when she saw a reunion of love, she felt it's importance and she didn't want it. She felt the weight of the grieve she thought she managed to let go of, she saw her friends loot the bodies and take the rings from their fingers, and truly understood that she'll never let go, not until she gives Ophelia a proper burial, even if only symbolic.

It was unnerving, guilt ridding, she never expected herself to feel this way, to actually want to live on, to move on from Ophelia, but that is the truth staring her square in the face. She can't ignore it, she can't pretend to not want a life, a deeper meaning in her existence, a night when she could simply enjoy music without her heart sinking, a deep connection with someone, even after all those times she's been betrayed.

She is naively in love with life, still. After all those years, that wonderlusting part of her soul is still there. It's beautiful, it's terrifying, it's hopeful. Shell always love Ophelia, but she still has more love to give, to be herself truly and explore her own soul.

At the end of the session she just stood there and listened to lovers reunite, feeling, searching inwards, terrified of her new discoveries. What a perfect way to progress her story.

#dnd diary #dnd party #dnd adventures #Licricia Verlan #dnd stories

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diaryoftheunidropout · 1 year

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DAY 52

This update is actually about day 51, since it's currently just a little over midnight.

I really need to get today off my chest in all its details because there is no one I can/want to tell about it. So this blog seems my best option. Just so it's a day that's recorded somewhere.

I spent the entire day with a friend of mine who doesn't live in Paris but comes here often. She is someone who has suffered and still suffers a lot, but she is truly one of the kindest and sweetest souls I know and I absolutely love her. We met up at around 10AM, so I woke up at 9AM feeling REALLY SHIT because I've been gettinbg very intense and almost constant vertigo from the brutal absence of antidepressants these past days, small side effects from the vaccine (feeling feverish, shortness of breath when making efforts), and a small cold due to the rapid switches in temperatures. All of this combined, taking into account the fact that I barely slept and not even well, gives... a very miserable me lol. Except I'd promised my friend I'd be there with her and there was no chance I was going to let her down.

So I started my day very tired and dizzy, knowing I was probably going to get home 14 hours later, although that meant being with someone I love, which I can only be very greatful for!

The cool things we did today are going to some sort of tiny... market? Like just people selling their stuff, and I found a cheap card game and those tablets you can use to draw (also very cheap). We also found some dolls we were looking for! We ate nice things at a restaurant, sat down for quite a while at Place d'Italie and laughed. My friend also went to get touch ups on her tattoo with an artist I'd seen before and she was honestly ever nicer than the first time we saw her (if that's even possible), the studio was actually inside her home and she let us play the music we wanted and we chatted about one of her tattoos (which I immediately recognized as being from one of my fav tattoo artists) and it was really cool!

So lots of good things you see. However, I feel the bad ones kind of dominated. This morning I get a text from my mom saying she cancelled her plans for the day (going to the movies and eating out). And then at some point early in the afternoon I get a message from her again saying she ended up getting out of bed because she'd met a guy on a dating app who had lost his wife to lung cancer around the same time as my mom and I lost my dad to lung cancer, and that he had a daughted living in London (thinking of it now, I want to see his daughter because life, what if she's my soulmate and we get married and shit okay sorry I'm totally insane). The point is it really hurt me to see that the only thing getting her out of bed was not the love my dad and I bear to her, all the fighting my dad's done and all the fighting I have done too, but just some random man she's never met and is just soooooo excited to meet and it's like the highlight of her day. It just hurts because I've been so incredibly sensitive about my dad lately like just writing the word dad could get me crying somehow.

Other bad thing that happened might seem shocking because why the hell would I consider this a bad moment, but at the restaurant with my friend I just started laughing hysterically over... I'm not quite sure what? I don't even remember? And it happened again later when we were sitting down in a park while watching some old memes I'd saved somewhere. But when I say hysterical laughter I don't mean like "hahaha I can't stop laughing this is funny", I mean like "I am laughing incredibly loudly and have zero control over my body right now and I am laughing so hard I am choking and actually very much in pain". Now that I think of it, it really felt like those couple of moments in my life I was so full of anger that I felt "out of my body" and just couldn't control anything anymore, except with laughter. I find it quite terrifying.

Then we saw a play that was possibly the best play I've seen in my entire life and it moved me so much I actually cried, but I still had to refrain from crying too much or too loudly in order not to have everyone mad at me or ruin my makeup, so it was just one more moment today having to keep my shit together. Also I had to get up like 10 times before the play started because people kept wanting to get to their seats, and then back to the toilet, and then back to their seats, and then they realized they had the wrong seat, and so on. Very annoying if you want my opinion. The play was still excellent though.

Then I realized I got a message from my ex landlady telling me that she hadn't replied to me earlier although she legally HAD to send me documents by a certain date, because she was busy with [blah blah insert personal life details I literally do not give a single fuck about] and she'd sent me a second email which is basically just some shitty screenshot that ""proves"" how much money I gave her so she would leave me the fuck alone except it proves absolutely nothing and does not confirm she will NEVER ask me for money ever again although she's already stolen thousands and thousands from me that my parents struggled to put aside and it got me so hysterical I became, well, hysterical in front of my friend, and then played it cool and acted like I wasn't going insane.

Then my friend and I sat down near the Eiffel Tower and we got a dozen illegal sellers in the span of 30 mins asking us over and over again if we wanted to buy their stuff, I even got a guy lying down next to me and telling me I was pretty and that I was in love with me although my friend and I kept asking him to kindly leave us alone, and then I got a guy selling roses shaking a rose right into my face while I was comfortable lying down watching the Eiffel Tower, and I just wonder, why the hell are people, especially men it seems, like this?!

And then I received a message from one of my mom's Internet friends whom she got into an argument with and blocked. Did not read the whole message but it was very overdramatic and all like "Adieu dear I shall never talk to you again" and I think that's literally SO fucking shitty of him to go and try to guiltrip a 18 year old girl into telling her mom to talk to him again, like I have my fucking mental struggles and enough shit to deal with, can't you just grow the fuck up (you're almost 50 years old) and leave me alone and deal with your own shit on your own instead of sending a lowkey cry of help to ME?

I again would love to insist on how tired, dizzy, feverish, mentally unstable, and just overall sick, I feel. Or I should say I AM.

All of this is real. I am not a lying. I am not a lier. I do not lie. I wish I could tell someone. I wish someone would listen. My uni best friend asked me how I was and I remained very vague. None of my other friends want to hear about my state. My mother is too fragile for me to tell her all of this without destroying her. My grandparents won't understand or won't be able to do much to help except perhaps guiltripping my mom into telling her she's not doing enough. My therapist listens and she's kind but she's very passive because of course this is my life but spending €50 for 45 minutes of me just saying "well I feel kind of bad" and her saying "okay" is literally so pointless, like why isn't she just giving me some words of affirmation?! She might not realize it but simply saying "I know your pain is real" would be fucking REVOLUTIONARY and instead all she tells me is "okay :)" and "oops, we're done with this session, it's time :)"... when I have made it clear that all I need is someone to say they believe me when I say I'm in pain. And she can't even tell me those words. Maybe because just like the others, she doesn't. Or she just doesn't understand my needs. Or both. I don't know. And let's not talk about doctors and psychiatrists who simply tell me I look "just fine" or refuse to listen to me when I say I have episodes that are NOT depressive episodes.

Right now I feel like I'm going through both (hypo)mania and depression. I am so incredibly sad and tired and I just want to rest in bed because I physically cannot keep up, and another part of me is motivated to try her very best to show excitement and joy and also believes in great things. Like two days ago I spent an hour staring at myself in a mirror and interviewing myself like I was a published author. And then today, as I said, I bought one of those tablets to draw because I'm like, secretly convinced I'll become a great tattoo artist, or the next great YA author with famous graphic novels, or I don't know.

I think as soon as my makeup is off I might bawl. I just want to sleep. Please let me rest.

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creamcheesefrosting · 2 years

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Diary Entry - 2nd May 2022

I often feel like I'm somehow better than everyone else, and also the worst human being to ever exist. I believe that I'm incredibly intelligent and talented, but also that my knowledge and skills are infinitely inferior to everyone around me. There is something inherently pretentious about that, I think. Tortured people are usually pretty pretentious.

I've had a lot of changes in my life recently. For a long time everything felt stagnant, and life lost a lot of its joy. COVID properly fucked up my life, actually. Even last year, when I was living with Steph, everything just felt hopeless and miserable. I hate stagnation, which is weird because new things make me anxious. But I hate feeling stuck. I hate feeling like my misery is permanent.

Now, though, it's one thing after another. I moved into a new flat on the 19th of April, all by myself. It's funny because I've lived alone before, but the prospect of doing it again felt really terrifying. Even though I'm only living an hour away from home, instead of 7 like I was before. I'm fine now though. My flat is tiny but it has massive windows, and my bedroom is up on a mezzanine platform. I love it.

I turned 24 a couple of days after moving. For some reason it made me really depressed. Every year feels shorter than the last, like I'm running out of time. I know I'm still young, but a part of me has always felt like I'm not meant to grow old, so I need to get everything done now. I'm trying to feel positive about it - turning 24. I started a new job a few days after that, a proper grown up one with free private healthcare and a pension plan. I'm trying to tell myself that it's a sign that this all coincided around my birthday, that this means that my 24th year is going to be a good one. It's a hard sell, honestly.

I think I've decided that I want to keep a proper diary again, which means I'm going to have to buy a new notebook and copy these first two entries into them. I've already used the original notebook for interview notes and stuff, so I want a fresh one. The first entry I wrote was just a stream of consciousness thing, really. Or maybe I'll put this on my side blog with zero followers. Save paper and all that. I've always liked attention, as long as it's the anonymous kind.

I feel like I haven't really grown up the way I was meant to. I live by myself, go to a 9-5 office job, pay bills, and have actual informed opinions, but I don't feel like I understand the world as much as I should. I know it's an autism thing, but it still makes me feel like an inadequate child. Gotta love the internalised ableism.

There's so much I want to write about. Stuff from now, and from the past. I don't really know where to start. I often wonder what my life would be like if I didn't have the friends and family I do have - what I would be like. I think I'd be a terrible person, to be honest. There are so many horrible things about me that I only keep hidden because I don't want to upset or disappoint anyone. My dad's side of the family is pretty awful, so maybe it's genetic. Nature verses nurture and all that.

Maybe I'll write more about it in the future. I think I will put this on my side blog. I don't know if I'll add tags - I don't know if I want people finding it or not, which is ridiculous because it'll be on the internet. I'll probably put some trigger warnings, just in case.

#online diary #personal #actually autistic #asd #depress #anxious #internalised ableism

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imnotsunshine · 2 years

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:]]

Brief mythology/pantheon thingy about the books

Chronos was the first and only god of everything but mostly time, he later cut off four fingers to make four children who will help him: Caellum, god of sky, Terra, goddess of earth, Oceana, goddess of ocean and Aetas, god of time. Those are the gaian gods. Aetas later couldn't control time anymore so he gifted humans that ability, Chronos got mad and fought him. The common consensus is that the gaian gods were myths and that Aetas died by Chronos. However the character in question met Oceana and she showed him that Aetas is trapped. The character from whose pov I wrote it wants to free Aetas so he can do what's best for the world but also it's the only way to save his mum.

I've tried to do what's right,

Yet I've just done whats wrong,

I shouldn't care but morality's a grip on me

A grip so tight

A grip so strong.

A grip so loose

A grip so frail.

I'm a hero, I'm a villain

I am desperate

My yell's a wail.

I need help, I need independence.

I know I'm your bad guy, just give me a chance

Whatever's the difference between a villain and a hero?

Satan and Prometheus are one and the same,

The difference is nothing, the difference is zero.

To save the world you balance your pride and you balance your blame

To save the world you balance the good and you balance the bad.

You're still saving no one, stop still being sad.

Aetas is dead, and so is the time.

Chronos is here, you'll pay for your crime.

I'm stuck I'm stuck I'm stuck

Nothing is relevant, I need to free him, get my goal

Why am i attached, it's now my turn to roll

The dice falls onto the table,

Tells a terrifying fable.

After all this time, to win the prize I pay the price.

I suppose that's what I'll be;

Time's last sacrifice.

okay pause. that’s like. so good.

“my yell’s a wail” is literally an fantastic line and i love the way it rhymes (i really like rhymes”

i think my favorite line is “ to save the world you balance the good and you balance the bad” tho. that’s just??? yeah??

you’re very talented pluto that’s awesome like really

#frend pluto #you’re so very talented

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