Meet the Nishikis follow-up to this
At 3 a.m. Nishikiyama Kazuya arrived home. Kikyo was already in bed, dozing. After opening the door, her husband stood there for a minute, silhouetted tall and thin in the light, like he didn’t know what he was doing there. Kikyo could tell from the shape of the silhouette that his vest was undone.
“Kazuya,” she said softly.
Dreamlike, he moved into the apartment, letting the door fall shut behind him. The room returned to blue darkness, but the window was open and even in the nighttime Kikyo could still see. As Nishikiyama approached, it became clear that there were bruises all over his neck and jaw.
“Oh,” Kikyo said. A familiar, quiet dread and anger.
“It’s okay,” Nishikiyama said. “I’m… fine.” His voice was wrecked. The only time she’d ever heard him more hoarse than this was a few years ago, when he and Akira and Yuko all caught laryngitis. Nishikiyama’s case had been so bad that he couldn’t speak for three whole days, only make a rough wheezing whisper.
That was the power of a virus. It had taken a few days to reach that climax. A man, however, could accomplish the same effect in hours. Or perhaps it had been minutes.
Kikyo had heard rumours that Nihara could be a brute. She tried to keep tabs on information like that. But if she was being honest, she hadn’t led much credence to the rumours. Nihara always seemed so measured and reasonable. And amid the preparations for the party and everything else going on lately, she’d forgotten to worry about it anyway.
Just as well. Her husband wouldn’t have changed his mind, and neither would she.
“I’m… going to shower,” Nishikiyama said.
“Okay.”
Still at a glacial pace, as though sleepwalking, Nishikiyama moved around the bed to the bathroom, dropping first his vest and then his shirt on the way. He flicked on the light, making the room turn yellow once more. Then he closed the door and the yellow was carven down into four thin lines, pale amid the darkness.
Kikyo let her eyes shut. She heard the faucet turn on, and then turn off, and retching, and the toilet flush. A few minutes after that the steady drumbeat of the shower began.
Kikyo drifted off. When she woke again the clock read 5:32 and the sound of the shower had stopped. Nishikiyama emerged from the bathroom just then, hair dripping wet and dressed in the fluffy white bathrobe.
“Hi,” Kikyo said.
Her husband nodded.
He climbed into bed, still wearing the bathrobe. He lay on his back and closed his eyes. He’d left the light in the bathroom on, and up close Kikyo could see how exhausted he looked. The little wrinkles visible around around his eyes. He hadn’t had those a few years ago. He would have to be very careful if he wanted to keep looking a decade younger than he was. She wished he didn’t have to. Maybe.
As she watched, slowly Nishikiyama swallowed and opened his eyes again. “…Can you pass me my-“
Wordlessly Kikyo reached over and passed him a bottle of pills from the nightstand. Nishikiyama unscrewed the bottle and dry-swallowed a pill.
“Long night,” he said. His voice sounded a bit better, but not very. Two hours of steam could only do so much. “I’m… sorry I couldn’t keep more of an eye on you.” Aside from the raw throat, it still sounded like voicing each word took a concerted mental effort. The phrases drawn out, like he couldn’t remember how to speak. “Did Dojima bother you?”
“No,” Kikyo said. “I stayed away from him and he didn’t cause trouble.”
Nishikiyama let out a long sigh of relief. “Thank god,” he murmured. “I don’t want to have to-“
“It’s fine,” she said. “It all turned out fine.” Silence. “How did things go with Nihara?”
“He’s… on board. I guess.”
“That’s good.”
Nishikiyama hummed.
“…Did you… check on Akira and Yuko,” Nishikiyama said. “When you… got back.”
“Yes. They’re fine. Sleeping.”
“Thank god. Thank god.” Then, “Oh, there’s… a new problem,” he said.
“What is it?”
“Awano-san said she’s divorcing her husband.”
Kikyo thought about that. “For you?”
“Yes.” A miserable whisper.
“And she was serious?”
“I think so. …Kikyo, I swear I didn’t try, I made it so clear to her I wasn’t interested-“
Letting out a soft laugh, Kikyo rolled over to look directly at her husband. “My poor dear love,” she said. “You don’t need to try. You just breathe, and the world throws itself at your feet.”
“Awano… is going to be pissed.”
“We’ll deal with that when we have to,” Kikyo replied. “He‘s just a high-ranking enforcer, anyway. Not even an officer, technically. If we had to please every person like that…” She was going to say that Nishikiyama would never get a moment’s rest. But he already didn’t, and neither did she. So, “It’s impossible,” she said. “Kazuya, put it from your mind. If Awano-san wants to make herself available to you, that doesn’t force you to take any actions.”
“…I know that. But her husband is going to be dead set against us from now on. That… isn’t what we need.”
“The cost of beauty,” Kikyo said, half bitterly. “People always want you to be theirs.”
Nishikiyama turned his head to look directly back at her for the first time since he’d returned. Face haggard, haunted eyes, even if she could ignore the bruising. “You shouldn’t have to be in a room with Dojima for even a minute,” he said.
“And you shouldn’t have to be in a room with half the people at that party. It’s fine; we all make sacrifices.”
“Maybe…” There was a slight slur in his voice. Most likely the medication was kicking in. “Kikyo,” he said. “How did things go with Higashiyama?”
For a moment she didn’t answer. “Good, I think,” she said at last. “He seemed open to the idea.”
“Thank god…”
“But-“ She hesitated.
“What,” Nishikiyama said.
“He… kept saying how he was disappointed that we didn’t bring Akira along. That he’s such a good young man, and growing to be so handsome, and that it would be wonderful to see him…” She trailed off. The implication curled heavy and ugly in the air.
“I - do we-“ Nishikiyama looked like he was struggling to verbalize. “We’re not… Higashiyama isn’t nearly important enough to even consider that. Right?” Uncertainty hanging on the words.
“Not to me. Not yet. No.” And, unspoken, she really hoped not ever.
Nishikiyama let out a sigh of obvious relief. “Thank god,” he murmured again. “Kikyo, do you ever worry that-“
“Shh,” she said quickly. “Kazuya, you need to sleep. You’ve been through a lot. Don’t fight the meds, okay?”
He swallowed, and she watched the purple bruises on his throat shift ever so slightly. How strange and sad, to have the most beautiful, brilliant husband in the world and see him repeatedly demolished.
“The kids-“ he tried again.
“I’ll bring them by myself. You should rest-“
“No,” he said, hoarse and desperate. “They’ve been looking forward to the aquarium since November. I told them we’d do it for Christmas. It’s New Year’s now. I want to go tomorrow.”
“Today, Kazuya. The sun will rise before too long, and you haven’t gotten a minute of rest. And you were in the hospital over Christmas, the kids can’t blame your for that.”
“Fuck… but I can still go.” He let out a sound between a cough and a wheeze, and winced.
Kikyo slid her hand slowly across the sheets to touch his forearm. Through the bathrobe, she pressed it lightly. “Sleep now. If you’re up to it later, we’ll all go, as planned.”
“Fuck Nihara,” Nishikiyama said, voice cracking on the syllables.
“Yes,” Kikyo agreed quietly. “Fuck Nihara.”
“Fuck Higashiyama.”
“Yes.”
“Fuck Awano, too.”
“Both of them,” Kikyo agreed.
“This better fucking work,” Nishikiyama said. It sounded like was crying, but no tears were visible. “This whole thing better be fucking worth it.”
Everyone, even the most steadfast visionaries, suffered moments of doubt. Kikyo had to believe that.
“Sleep now,” she said. “Aquarium later. And tomorrow…”
“I’m going to bring this world to its knees,” Nishikiyama said, weak but vehement. “I’m going to finish this. No one will be able to touch us again.”
Without looking, Kikyo’s hand found his. She squeezed. His fingers twitched. Perhaps the best response he could muster under the circumstances.
Kikyo woke up at 7:30 and put on her makeup and did her hair and put in earrings and got dressed. She started cooking breakfast, and then went to rouse Akira and Yuko.
“Good morning!” she said, brightly but quietly. So as not to disturb her husband. “Akira-kun, Yuko-chan, happy new year!” She gently shook Akira’s shoulder.
He instantly sat up. “Happy new year, mom!” he said, eyes shining. “Are we-“
“Don’t you want to hurry and get your breakfast?” Kikyo said in her peppiest voice. “I made a western food, and I think you’ll like it.”
Akira’s face turned pleading. “But, mom, are we-“
“Hush, Akira! Hurry and come eat,” She pulled Yuko out of bed, giving her a kiss on the head. “Come now!”
She returned to the kitchen to check the fish-shaped pancakes. After two minutes the kids, still sleepy, came in and climbed into the chairs. Perfect timing. Kikyo flipped the first two pancakes one last time, scooped one onto each plate standing ready, decorated them with strawberry sauce, and placed them with a flourish in front of her children.
Akira looked to the pancake and back to her, eyes wide. “Mom, it’s a fish shape! Are we-?”
“Yes, of course we’re going to the aquarium, you silly boy,” she said, smiling. “We promised, didn’t we? Now hurry and eat so you can get ready.”
Yuko started making a high-pitched sound that was blessedly faint.
“Stop that, Yuko,” Kikyo ordered. She cut Yuko’s pancake into pieces so Yuko could grab it with her chopsticks.
“Whoa,” Akira said after tasting the pancake. “It’s like a dessert.”
“Special occasion,” Kikyo said. She served them each another pancake and sat down with some of her own.
The kids ate quickly, and got dressed on their own in passable outfits. Kikyo handed Akira his coat and pulled Yuko over. She managed to get a coat over Yuko’s shoulders before Yuko started fidgeting.
“Mom, where’s dad?” Akira asked. “Isn’t he here? Is he going to meet as at the aquarium?”
“Your father is tired from work,” Kikyo said, trying to stop Yuko’s right arm from flailing. “He’s resting. Maybe he’ll join us for dinner afterward. Akira, button up your-” she reached for his coat.
Akira’s face fell. “What?” he asked, distraught, tears already welling up. “Dad’s not coming?”
“Who’s telling tall tales about me?” Nishikiyama asked from behind them. Kikyo turned. He was leaning on the doorway, smiling broadly, all dressed and ready to go. There was a scarf wound around his neck, and no bruises visible on his chin. Well - if he could cover up eye circles every day, what was a little bruise?
“Dad!” Akira extracted himself from Kikyo’s attentions and ran to his father, immediately latching onto his leg. Yuko followed, laughing in excitement. She immediately started biting the other leg.
“Ow, stop that, Yuko,” Nishikiyama chided. He scooped her up in one arm, kissing her on a round little cheek. With the other hand he ruffled Akira’s hair. Nishikiyama’s hair was wavier than usual from having foregone its usual post-shower blow dry, but other than that - well, no one would ever guess the state he’d been in just a few hours ago.
“Dad, dad, you’re coming with us, right?” Akira pleaded, tugging on his arm.
“Of course I am,” Nishikiyama replied, the smile never for a minute leaving his face. “We agreed on it, right?”
“Yes!” Akira’s eyes shone.
“Daddy, I wanna bring the shark,” Yuko said. “Can I bring the shark?”
“Your shark is in my purse,” Kikyo said. “Ill give it to you once we’re in the car so you don’t drop it. Kazuya, give me Yuko so I can finish putting her coat on.”
Obligingly he lowered Yuko to the ground. Kikyo started trying to get her to put her arms through the sleeves of her coat. It was an involved task.
Vaguely in the background Kikyo could hear Nishikiyama and Akira negotiating over Akira possibly being picked up. The terms apparently agreed upon-
“Whoop! Here we go!” Nishikiyama lifted Akira onto his shoulders. “Okay, now, warn me if we’re going to run into anything, okay? I don’t want you to hit your head.”
Beaming, Akira nodded vehemently.
When they finally made it out the door and to the elevator, Nishikiyama put Akira down. Yuko started racing circles around them and bumping into the walls while Akira tried to stop her.
Kikyo kept her voice low and looked at her own smeared, vague reflection in the burnished gold walls of the elevator instead of looking at her husband.
“Kazuya, are you sure you’re-“
“Yes,” he said.
“Did you take your-“
“Yes.”
“You should eat something,” she murmured.
Nishikiyama pulled a clementine out of his pocket and brandished it at her.
Insufficient. As usual. But at least it was something.
The elevator dinged and they exited in the parking area. When they reached the car, Nishikiyama hesitated. “Kikyo, could you-“ She went to the driver’s side and he got in on the left. They buckled Akira and Yuko into their car seats and then peeled off.
“Shark!” Yuko said. “Shark!”
“Say please, Yuko-chan,” Kikyo said, but Nishikiyama was already handing Yuko the shark. He cast Kikyo an apologetic glance at pre-empting her order. Kikyo sighed.
In the back seat, Akira started talking about the fish documentary he’d watched at school.
“Kazuya, how are you feeling?” Kikyo asked, voice low.
“Great!” he said, flashing a grin. “Excited to see some marine life, right, kids?” He swivelled around to address them, and they cheered.
He never knew when it was safe to stop the fucking performance.
On they drove. It was only a twenty minute drive to the aquarium, but traffic was a bit dense. Akira babbled on about the documentary and about his fish report that had received an top grade, and Yuko slapped her shark against the back of Kikyo’s seat.
Kikyo put on the blinker and glanced over her shoulder as she changed lanes. She remembered that the other day she’d left a coupon for the food court in the mall outside the aquarium in the glove compartment. “Kazuya, could you pass me-“ A second glance revealed that his head was leaning way back on the headrest: eyes closed, lips slightly parted. He was asleep.
Under his jaw there was a little spot of green bruising that he’d missed covering up with concealer. Her hands tightened on the wheel.
“The shark is going to eat you, Akira!” Yuko was saying shrilly. “She’s biting your fingers off!”
“No, she isn’t,” Akira said, voice striking a balance between petulance and dignity. “She’s not even a real shark, she’s made of plastic.”
“No!” Yuko shouted. “Real shark!”
Nishikiyama’s head jerked up. He’d been awoken by the noise. There was an incredibly blurry look in his gaze.
“Indoor voices, Yuko!” Kikyo said. “Don’t shout in the car or I’ll take the shark away.”
“No!” Yuko said. “She’s my shark!”
“Dad,” Akita said desperately, “Did you know that oarfishes are the longest fishes in the world?”
“Oh?” Nishikiyama said, turning around, smile plastered back on his face. “That’s crazy! How long do they get?”
There was a beat of silence, and Kikyo knew instinctually that Akira was upset. Her eyes flicked to the rearview mirror. Sure enough, he looked stricken. He didn’t know how long oarfish got.
“I bet they get almost as long as a dragon,” Nishikiyama said quickly, realizing his mistake. “Do you think so?”
“Probably,” Akira said desperately. “Probably they get even longer than a dragon.” He paused. “But they’re better than dragons, anyway, because dragons aren’t even real.” He finished in a rush, and another look in the rearview showed him flushed with pride at the speech.
“Holy shit, are you - I mean, geez Louise, are you sure, Akira?” Nishikiyama said, shooting another glance at Kikyo. Apologetic, and maybe, this time, panicked, too. Kikyo didn’t think she’d ever heard him slip up like that in front of the kids. She wanted to take him home and wrap him in a blanket and force him to get some proper rest.
“Yes,” Akira said, doubling down. He gripped the sides of his car seat and strained forward. “Dragons aren’t real. They’re like Santa Claus.”
“Wow,” Nishikiyama said. “You’re a smart kid, Akira. That’s pretty advanced stuff.”
“I guess so,” Akira said modestly.
“Santa Claus is real,” Yuko said quietly.
“Of course Santa Claus is real,” Nishikiyama said. Kikyo cast him a sidelong look just in time to catch him winking, presumably at Akira.
“So kids!” Nishikiyama said. “What kinds of animals do you think we’ll see at the aquarium? Elephants?”
Akira and Yuko laughed. “No!” Akira said. “The aquarium is for fishes, not land mammals, dad.”
“Oh, I see. So… like giraffes?”
Again Akira and Yuko burst into laughter. Nishikiyama echoed them. It was the host laugh. The same laugh he’d been making for Nihara last night. Kikyo flexed her hands around the wheel.
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