#not gonna lie i'd 100% watch that magic show

[alasarys]

Horsing around in Texas

#it's like the start of the most chaotic magic show ever #i'm assuming daniel is the magician and lando is his glamorous assistant #who sometimes disappears when he isn't meant to and reappears unexpectedly #and sometimes you know where he is just because he can't stop laughing #not gonna lie i'd 100% watch that magic show #lando norris #daniel ricciardo #dando #cota 2022 #no brakes #texas #2022

[best-fnaf-song-competition]

Did you see the movie? Thoughts?

-✨️

I DID AND I COMPLETELY FORGOT TO SAY ANYTHING HERE DIDNT I

IT WAS SO MUCH FUN I'm gonna put my spoiler thoughts under a read more but for here: I had an absolutely FANTASTIC time! I went with a few friends who love fnaf as much as I do and we were losing our minds any time ANYTHING happened it was probably the most fun I've ever had going to see a movie!!! I went with incredibly low expectations so I was completely blown away by how much effort went into making it actually fun for the fans!!!! I brought my Foxy plushie to watch it with us so he could learn <3

Okay spoiler thoughts now c:

HOLY SHIT YALL THIS MOVIE FUCKED LIKE HELL I genuinely started crying during any scene where the animatronics were allowed to be silly!!! They're just kids!!!! They're just little kids and this movie showed that way more than the games ever have and it really showed how much the people who made this really understand how that would come across in a non-survival game format

My bestie and I had to stop ourselves from genuinely screaming when the cop introduced herself as Vanessa, we were NOT expecting them to go THAT RECENT when making a movie about the first game what the HELL!!!!!!! I was so excited, she's genuinely one of my favorite fnaf characters overall so it was really cool to see a different spin on her character c:

You may know one of my besties from a video essay about the mimic that fucking dunks on matpat for incessantly insisting the books are canon and using them to make theories about the games, and I got to help a lot with that actually! Which means we both hate matpat! Which meant we spent his entire scene losing our minds to the point where we didn't even hear him say his line!!! Still the funniest thing they could have done tbh

I was in love with this movie the entire time and all the little nods to things were REALLY REALLY COOL, I knew there was going to be a bunch of little stuff when fucking chicas magic rainbow from fnaf world was an ice cream logo. The midnight motorist shirt was something I was really excited to spot, and I didn't remember the dog enough to recognize him when the movie was playing but as soon as people on Tumblr brought it up again it all clicked and that is SO FUNNY, of all things to add in as an easter egg you chose that? Funniest move ever, really really loved the audience reaction video I watched where someone got to that scene and just yelled "SPARKY?????"

AND I WILL NOT LIE, I WAS 100% SINGING DURING THE CREDITS AS SOON AS THE FACT THAT THEY ACTUALLY FUCKING GOT THE SONG SET IN I guess it really does deserve to be so high on our list!!! I'd gotten so used to it over the years that it took hearing it in a new context to be reminded how much it slaps and now it's way higher on my list of favorites <3

I'm glad everyone hates balloon boy just as much as me, I started cheering every time foxy started humming, and the actor for afton KILLED IT every time he was on screen!!!! I had SUCH a good time!!!

#genuinely one of my favorite movie experiences #got so excited about everything i gave myself one of the worst migraines ive ever had #BUT IT WAS WORTH IT #i almost wish we were in a theater with more fans #because WE were the group losing it at every tiny thing #fnaf movie #not a poll #ask #anonymous #THANKS FOR REMINDING ME I MEANT TO SEND MY THOUGHTS HERE #also as soon as i get my brain under control the nightcove poll IS happening

[porcupine-girl]

Hidden Blade thoughts!

IT WAS SO GOOD

YIBO WAS SO GOOD

I would've followed a bit better if I understood more about the political landscape of WWII China, but it wasn't too bad. Definitely one of those movies where I want to go back and rewatch it immediately now that I know what I know from the end.

I will put the rest under a cut because very definitely spoilers.

The entire first half, I was kind of confused and disappointed because Yibo's role was barely a background character? I was like... how did he get second billing? How did he catch the critics' attention?

Then he has the scene in the bathroom with his ex-fiance, and from there suddenly he's the main character of the second half of the movie. It's like Tony Leung got half and he got half LOL And he's so damn good in his half.

I don't particularly like or care about fight scenes, but his were so good?? That first one with the bitchslap, he's just explosive. In the bathroom scene he becomes a ticking time bomb that's just waiting for an excuse to go off, and when he does it's breathtaking. But then he manages to just bottle that energy back up as soon as he's done with one fight, and spends the rest of the movie like that. Like every single scene he was in from there on I was convinced he was about to go off and kill someone or at least maim them - he only winds up doing it a few more times, but anytime he's not being violent you can just feel the violence he's bottling up inside radiating out of him. I can 100% see why the NYT chose the words "simmering" and "mesmerizing."

I will admit I might not have been as transfixed during Yibo & Tony's big fight scene (which, the bts is just a tiny clip of a very long scene) if it weren't for the fact that I'd seen the clip of the truck scene so I knew they both survived, so I spent the entire time holding my breath like how the fuck do they both survive this. Like, it just doesn't seem like the kind of fight where one is gonna let the other walk away. But speaking of that...

Two bits my husband and I did not understand by the end:

If Ye was actually on He’s side the whole time, why did they have the huge fight?? Like that seemed way more than necessary just to continue pretending to be on opposite sides. Sure, Ye couldn't have just let He go or vice-versa, but like they both nearly killed the other multiple times, and tbh the only reason Ye survived that fall is movie magic (it might not be wuxia but it did inherit just a smidge from that genre in terms of this fight scene I think). Why such a knock-down drag-out fight if they're actually on the same side? Surely they could've made less look like more.

Then the much smaller thing: Early on, He buys pastries to pass a note to… his wife? It happens so early when you don’t know who anyone is, by the time they come back to it I couldn’t quite remember what had happened. I think it turned out to be his wife. Anyhow, then later the Japanese guy asks what took him so long and he says he was buying dim sum but then produces the pastries??? Why did he say it was dim sum? Such a weird lie to tell when you've got the pastries to show him (I assume He bought two boxes). And the Japanese guy doesn't comment on it or anything. Were the subtitles just mistranslated or something? IDK my husband thought he heard them say dim sum but obviously he wasn't paying close attention to that detail as they were saying it, that was just in retrospect after he realized it wasn't dim sum, so maybe they said something else and it got mistranslated.

Edit: Mystery solved! @trickybonmot says she heard them say 点心 (dianxin), and according to purpleculture.net (whose dictionary is top-notch and I trust way more than Google), that can mean dessert/pastry OR dim sum! So it’s not exactly mistranslated, they just chose the translation that makes less sense to English-speaking audiences.

Overall, btw, the translation was great. SO much smoother and less awkward than literally any TV show I've watched. They had both Mandarin and English subs up the whole time, even when the characters were speaking Japanese or Shanghainese.

It was very violent and there were a lot of things that were highly disturbing in a "horrors of war" kind of way. Like yes some bits were gory but I think the disturbing outweighed the explicitly gory by far.

The nonlinear narrative has gotten mixed reviews; I think it's the kind of thing where if you like that type of storytelling (which I do!) you'll like it and if you don't you won't. If you're neutral idk what you'll think. There were definitely a few times when I wasn't totally sure when we were, but usually it didn't make things outright not make sense. There are also a few scenes that I'm still not sure why we went back to them, but I bet if I rewatched it those choices would make more sense.

It was definitely communist propaganda, but I don't think that was heavy-handed. They just showed the communists as definitely The Good Guys of the war. Obviously Japan was The Bad Guy, but they kind of just pushed the non-communist Chinese nationalists to one side and ignored them? IDK, again I might not understand the politics or get the references well enough to know how they actually handled it, but it mostly seemed like that side was more ignored than, like, actively portrayed as bad the way the Japanese were. It doesn't actually, like, make any claims about why communism is good or anything, it's more like “communists” just happens to be the name of the good guys in this war. The ideology itself makes like one brief appearance when Ye's ex-fiance talks about laborers, and even then she says maybe I'll marry a laborer or an intellectual and I was like 😬 and how did communism work out for the intellectuals in 20-30 years? Not sure if that was actually a subtle dig on Cheng Er's part or not.

Anyhow I am very excited to talk about the movie with anyone who's seen it, or I can answer questions for anyone who hasn't!

#wang yibo #hidden blade #wu ming #无名 #王一博

[juniperhillpatient]

The Crossroads of Destiny Re-Watch

WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Definitely one of my favorite episodes of the entire series OOOH I love Crossroads of Destiny so FUCKING! MUCH! It's such a good episode.

Alright, so, shocking to no one probably, I've discussed this episode before. I'm linking a post I wrote about Azula & Zuko's dynamic in this episode because I think that it explains a lot of where I'm coming from. HERE ya go.

This is mostly a Zuko episode, honestly. So, let's talk about him. Zuko is READY to fight Azula. Like, no hesitation, dramatics & violence at the ready he is prepared to be on sight. Lucky for him, Azula doesn't really want to fight him. Otherwise, he'd probably be dead. Sorry Zuzu but it's the truth. Iroh demonstrating how he got the nickname the Dragon of the West is pretty iconic. +500 iconic behavior points. Also, +100 to Ty Lee & Sokka for their flirty banter-filled fight. I'm not gonna lie, I'm sort of starting to ship them. The mid-fight flirting is just fun, okay? Although yes, I'm aware that it's a tactic on Ty Lee's part. That doesn't mean she doesn't think he's cute also.

It's hilarious how some things never change & some things stay the same (....I sang-read that in my head...I listen to too much Frozen...anyway) from my initial reactions to this show like 2 years ago lol. I didn't get spoilers per se before watching ATLA but it's such a popular show in the public's consciousness that I did kinda know Zuko would be redeemed, & I just assumed I'd ship Zutara so I read the scene romantically & liked it for that reason.

[ID: Katara & Zuko in the crystal catacombs. She is crouching far away from him, looking tearful. end id]

I don't read the tension between Zuko & Katara that way anymore, but I see how someone could. Anyway, I wrote THIS post about Katara & why I think she acts the way she does. That said, I'm still annoyed with her for offering to use the spirit water on Zuko though because GIRL I get you but also it is a WAR lmao you don't think you might need the magic healing water? For something more important? Like, Zuko will live, he's not even in physical pain right now!

Watching Azula's devious & brilliant coup unfold is just...SO FUCKING SATISFYING GOD I LOVE AZULA SO FUCKING MUCH SHE'S SO FUCKING COOL!!! AHHH!!!!!! Okay, I'm calm. ish. I just...I just...LOVE HER SO MUCH.

[ID: Azula saying "Don't flatter yourself. You were never even a player." end id]

SHE'S SO ICONIC!!!!!! AHH!!!! Okay, I'm trying to be reasonable. +3000 iconic behavior points. I had to stop myself from giving her like 20k because like!!!!! HAVE YOU SEEN HER??? I LOVE HER.

Okay. *ahem.* Anyway. Iroh in this episode is super interesting. They lean REAL hard into the "wise old man who says proverbs" thing in this episode. And I think that's sort of the narrative pushing the audience to see Iroh as more of a perfect wise old man than an actual character in his own right, & that kinda gets on my nerves. BUT, looking at Iroh as a complex character, I do think I can get behind the idea that Iroh WAS willing to be complacent in the life he was presented with but NOW....he saw a chance to help the Avatar, & realized he had to take it. He realized that Zuko was going to go back to the home that traumatized him, & he panicked. I've seen a lot of fans criticize Iroh for never telling Zuko, "hey, maybe you should consider that the Fire Nation is evil & the Avatar is good." I think I would rather criticize the writers for not showing us more of Iroh's internal struggles though because the inconsistencies ARE interesting on a character level if you think about Iroh as a person. ✨Nuance ✨The main reason they become annoying is if you take the presentation of an "infinitely wise old man with all the answers" & run with it too hard. Not the most interesting way to look at it. So, in that way, Zuko's betrayal hurts.

But in the way that all I care about in life is the Fire Siblings.....Zuko's betrayal is the most iconic thing he's ever done actually! +2000 iconic behavior points. Obviously, I'm being hyperbolic & you guys (hopefully) know I don't actually root for the Fire Nation but I just love the Fire Siblings.

I will say though - something that hasn't changed about my perception of Zuko's betrayal - I 100% get it & I was never mad at him for it. I'm not saying I'm NEVER mad at Zuko ok, don't group me in with people who wash away all of Zuko's flaws please, I'm saying that I sympathize & get why he did what he did & I felt this way the first time that I watched too because I remember arguing (not like angry arguing, just debating) it with my family. Literally, the Fire Nation is all he knows! His SISTER is telling him to please come home. He misses his father & wants his father's approval. It's like....completely sympathetic & understandable. I'm not saying he's RIGHT I'm saying it's sympathetic. There's a huge difference. ✨Nuance✨

Oh & the fight scenes in this episode!!!!! Shocking to 0 people my favorite is Katara versus Azula. They're both incredible benders & it's a spectacular fight & ALSO NARRATIVE FOILS FIGHTING EACH OTHER!!! TWO PRODIGIOUS YOUNG BENDERS FIGHTING SIDE BY SIDE WITH THEIR BROTHERS FOR WHAT THEY BELIEVE IS RIGHT!!! FIRE VERSUS WATER - & LIKE BLUE FIRE (THE HOTTEST KIND) VERSUS ICE!!! YEAHHH!!!!!

[ID: Azula with her bans swooshing in front of her. end id]

Katara gets +3000 iconic behavior points for CUTTING OFF PART OF AZULA'S BANGS with ice. Oh & I never noticed it until now but it sort of parallels the moment when Zuko cuts off the end of the wheat Jet has in his mind in THEIR homoerotic boss fight. I KNOW these are two of my favorite ships for good reason, if your ships can't have epic death battles nearly killing each other what is even the POINT MAN!!!

Um, anyway. And Aang dies. What is it with the final Chosen One Tm heroes dying? Buffy, Aang, Harry Potter...Sorry for bringing the Terf series into it but like....C'mon, y'all get why I did right this is a pattern in iconic coming-of-age Chosen One stories. I don't know what it means, but it means something, I'm sure of it.

Luckily, Katara still has the spirit water & she saves Aang's life, so he's fine. Yay! That is about all I have for this episode for now. I'll tally the iconic behavior points in a separate post :)

#the crossroads of destiny #crossroads of destiny #atla book 2 #atla re watch

[what-gs-watching]

"If you have to ask, you're streets behind."

Welp. This week on What G's Watching: comfort shows.

Because gang, I got (somewhat surprisingly) laid off yesterday. Internal politics, blah blah blah, a lot crying, a lot of beautiful messages from coworkers, some insomnia, more crying, cleaning random things, turning my airpods up as high as they go and screaming through playlists. You get it. 

So if I thought I was watching everything before, just kidding. It's about to get so much worse. Which means, right now, I need comfort shows.

Today's comfort show highlight? Community. A pure and beautiful masterpiece.

Here's the thing: I watched Community from the beginning. Like, when it started airing weekly on NBC in 2009. From the very first episode. Because I'm ancient. I was a fan of Joel McHale from Talk Soup (oh yeah, we're going back that far) and I would have watched him in anything, so I was down for a show about a community college, hell, I'd even gone to one for a little bit.

But it's so much more than that. It's hilarious and real and way too meta for most people and all of the characters are imperfect and ridiculous and some of the plots are so dumb, but it makes you feel things. 

The overall point of the show was that Jeff was a lawyer who lied about having a bachelor's degree and got caught so he goes Greendale Community College to replace it. He lies about having a spanish study group to hook up with a blonde in his class - Britta - and ends up creating an actual study group with the help of Abed, who I'm not gonna lie, might be my favorite character. 

Group of the usual suspects, right: 

- Jeff is the handsome manipulative one (I'm still not quite sure why Joel McHale is handsome, like, its WEIRD but I'm here for it)

- Britta starts out as a chick in her late 20's who maybe got lost along the way and was trying to clean her life up and then she kind of becomes a caricature of herself later on, but it works

- Shirley's a mom going through a divorce, wanting to start her own business

- Pierce is a rich old guy that's been going to Greendale for years just for something to do (Chevy Chase returning to TV, which sounds great but then it gets weird behind the scenes)

- Abed is sweet and magical and likely on the spectrum (and the best unreliable narrator)

- Troy is a former high school football star that suffered an injury (he's Childish Gambino! Before anyone knew he was Childish Gambino! But he will ALWAYS be Troy to me)

- Annie is young and a perfectionist and a control freak who had a pill addiction that landed her there (Allison Brie becoming Allison Brie)

and it starts out as you would assume it should, but it gets unexpectedly hilarious. And I give that credit to Dan Harmon. For his flaws, Dan Harmon is a tortured genius and I will, and mostly do, watch anything that man is involved in. He puts shit in your face that you never wanted but in a way that makes you laugh out loud and then hurt a little bit, for a while. 

Honestly the charm of the show comes from the fact that it never truly takes itself seriously. Abed relates to the world through media (hi it's me, I'm the problem, it's me) and he insists time and again that they're in a tv show. Episode about everyone turning into Zombies because of tainted food at the Halloween dance? Completely plausible. 'Bottle' episode because Annie lost a pen and she can't fucking take it anymore, someone must have stolen it? Yes. Series-running story about the "Ass Crack Bandit" that drops a quarter on you when you least expect it, resulting in one of the best episodes of the later seasons? 100%. 

Abed deciding that by rolling a dice to see who goes down to get the pizza being delivered, six different timelines are being created? That one will knock you on your fucking ass. And it makes no sense, but it really, really does. 

This show has given me a lot of random things that still rattle around in my brain, even now N rewatches deep. Way back when offices were a thing, I'd once shouted "BOOKS!"when it was particularly quiet and a single engineer stood up across the room and just pointed at me, incredulous. After that he and I didn't stop terrorizing the entire team with random quotes. I still find myself humming 'Daybreak' (IYKYK). Yesterday while I muddled through my feelings I started yelling "I'm high as hell and I'm about to get SHOT!" It's infectious, it gets in your bones.  

The best part of course is the relationships, complicated but sweet and endearing. Troy and Abed form a friendship that makes me sad almost because it's childish and pure for a while and it does (what I think, I'm not an expert though so who knows) a pretty good job of portraying the bond that can come out of accepting someone on the spectrum wholly and fully. 

They build a blanket fort. They pretend to have their own morning tv show (🎶Troy and Abed in the mornnnniiiing 🎶). They dress up in coordinated Halloween costumes. They get obsessed with Inspector Spacetime (we're gonna get to Doctor Who, I promise). They spout off the best random Spanish rap and create 'Baby Boomer Santa'. They invent the Dreamatorium. They pillow fight for hours because they think if they stop, their friendship will end. 

The two of them desperately make you wish you had a friend like that in your early twenties to just get real WEIRD with, because they'd always go along with it and have your back no matter what. I still, very much, want to build a blanket slash pillow fort half as majestic. (Which, maybe I should. I have a fuck ton of time right now.)

Honestly, Community is one of those things I sometimes measure people against. Seen it and loved it? You rank a little bit higher with me. Season 4's your least favorite? it's okay bud, we all agree. You wanna use your name in poorly concocted puns? That's you're i-dean-tity, I'm with it. You found something that's streets ahead? YES. Be my best friend.

I know a lot of people feel a certain way about Friends, like, oh they're the friends everyone wishes they had, but I'm sorry. No. The friends you wish you had are the Greendale Seven. And there's too many moments and too much to go into here, but you need to trust me on that. Because they're all just flawed people trying to do better in a flawed place that manifests a little bit of the mania we all feel. And it lets you feel it, but it always wraps you up safe at the end. Jeff always brings it home with a perfect Winger speech. And sometimes I really wish life was a little bit more like that. Because sometimes we suffer a fucking gas leak year in our existence, sometimes it's like that, and it'd be nice if everyone just shrugged that off, if everyone just accepted the fact that we're all flawed, selfish people is actually a strength. 

At one point in the first season, Abed gets obsessed with "The Cape" (which was a real show, y'all) and he's skulking around in this ridiculous get-up and Jeff yells "That show's gonna last three weeks!" and while Abed runs off he yells "SIX SEASONS AND A MOVIE!"

During the show's run, #sixseasonsandamovie became a mantra, because it was always on the brink of cancellation - season six was revived by Yahoo Stream, which isn't even a thing anymore - and I still think about that when I want something to last. I want #sixseasonsandamovie for everything that I love. I want everything to have that little bit of magic and faith. 

I started my latest rewatch a couple of weeks ago, compelled to seek out the comfort for some reason, my brain trying to tell me something was wrong. My brain had been right. So yesterday I eventually climbed into bed with puffy eyes and I got back into season five. I'm already into the part where the show starts to dismantle a bit (the second half of season 5 and all of 6 are distinctly different but still perfect), and that makes sense for me right this second, it's fitting. Sometimes things fall apart. Sometimes people leave. Sometimes you have to clone yourself in a game of 'the floor is lava' so you can properly say goodbye. 

I'll finish it again in the next couple of days I'm sure, and I'll put it down for a while (until the next time my brain is trying to tell me something). But I'll be thankful I had something to turn to while I attempted to sort myself out. 

Greendale is always the perfect place to sort yourself out. 

#community nbc #troy and abed #what g's watching #six seasons and a movie #streets ahead

[hennessystevens-udaku]

PAWN

Charlie stared cheekily at the woman standing transfixed in the darkness ahead of her. Her beautiful, intelligent sister wife had followed Erik like a stowaway and he ain’t even know it, that freaking tiny genius. She curved her manicured finger beckoning Henny closer to the glass.

“You wanna be a king,” Charlie asked, leaning in. Henny wanted it, Charlie could see it in her big brown eyes. They yearned for control. She had the makings, but she had to deliberately choose it. “The queen is the most valuable player on the board, so by right our Dominant only holds the power we allow him. Baby girl, you already hold the high cards, you just gotta pull your rank. Tell me you feel me.”

“Oh I feel you. I got some stuff I wanna do,” Henny asserted, her eyebrows rising. She was serious and already plotting. Charlie grinned, excitement bubbling. She loved this side of Henny. So determined, so eager, so ready to explore. She just needed some light guidance and as sure as Kimora was her dance teacher, she’d teach Henny to dom. If anything, it would shock the heck out of Erik. Maybe she’d even get to watch.

“You’ll do them all if you remember these three things. One, our man is a total brat which means he is submissive. Behind his bravado lies a sub begging to be tamed.” All of the sister wives including herself were submissive brats, but Henny placed in the top tier when it came to high ratios of brattiness. She was 100% Brat while Charlie was a switch.

“Two, if you know what you like then you know what to give. If you like it there’s a good chance he will too. Use that to make him beg. And three, don’t bruise his ego unless you plan to heal it. We don’t want to break him emotionally for a scene, but I know that’s not an issue you’d have.”

“Hell no, we get enough of his emo ass. I just wanna make him grovel for once, switch positions.” Charlie smirked thinking of the scenarios they’d get up to.

“I’d like to see that. How about this, I’m a feel him out when we get back to the hotel and if it’s a go, I’ll let you know. If you liked what you saw of him tonight, you’re gonna love seeing what else he’s capable of.”

---

Hennessy’s big doe eyes twinkled in the glow of the neon purple light. She was intrigued by the idea of making Erik her bitch, having him grovel at her feet being an underlying kink of hers. She wasn’t necessarily dominant in nature, but she did enjoy being in control.

She felt the energy shifting within the small room, a tell-tell sign that her alter ego was stirring. This sort of thing was right up Kitana’s alley and it had been so long since she’d been out to play. For the first time in her 26 years, Hennessy surrendered herself to the woman, allowing Charlie to use her in whatever ways she saw fit. Afterall, one can’t expect to dominate successfully if they didn’t play the submissive role every once in a while.

---

Back at the aparthotel, there were four rented rooms, three people per room. A little shuffling around and Charlie and Hennessy were able to finesse a room together with Erik, at least for the night. Erik's body immediately gravitated to Charlie. With no border between them she knew he planned to beat the pink out of her pussy, but as much as she wanted that.. there was business to take care of. She rushed to her suitcase and pulled her cuffs.

“Uh-uh, babygirl, you think you finna restrain me and I ain't touched you in days,” he asked reaching out quickly again and again, but Charlie dodged each time sending a slight wink to Henny. “Come here,” he commanded, his finger pointing down. She knew what that meant, but she wasn't dropping to the floor tonight.

“What I say to call me? Just because the location changed doesn't mean our arrangement did. For the next few hours, I own you or until I say otherwise,” she dodged his cat-like lunge having played this cat and mouse game with him several times before.

“See Henny, with two dominants.. power struggles are bound to happen, but the true dominant is patient and does not relent. Erik, babe, you gone have to switch the reigns tonight because I know exactly what I want from you and I'll have it before the night is through.”

“ChaCha.. You think I can't just catch you if I wanna catch you?” He grinned, poised to strike yet again.

“Oh I know you can, but you haven't which means you want me to forcefully take control. Why? Cuz you a freaky ass bratty nigga. Don't ever forget that I know you as well as you know me, babyboy..” His eyes went pleadingly to Henny who was watching, entertained. “Nah, don't look at her! Your wife on my side. Come here, Hennessy!” With the quickness, Henny moved to Charlie's side, sticking out her tongue at Erik.

“Ohh.. I'm a get yo lil munchkin ass,” he said nodding his head in betrayal. He was too calm, he would definitely get her eventually, but for now Henny was protected.

“You ain't even know she followed you tonight did you? You got a smartass wife, better tighten up, beloved. If you don't want your cover blown further, that is. In the meantime..” Charlie approached Erik slowly, but with unwavering confidence. The look in his eye said she wouldn't even need the cuffs this time.

“On your knees,” Charlie demanded coolly and Erik narrowed his eyes, leaning in challenge into her space, an intimidation attempt. A loud slap crossed his cheek followed by her soft palm rubbing at the spot of impact. Charlie's lips were at his ear, whispering. “You know the rules, love, we only ask once.”

“I'm a get you back,” he said point blank with strong eye contact before Charlie rounded him again and kicked in his kneecaps, taking him down to the floor..

“I know.. But for now, you're on my time. Be a good bitch or I'll make it worse and little Henny gonna see what a naughty boy you really are.”

“Yes, King Jade,” he said not wanting to go full little boy around Henny. If he'd called her Mama Jade, that would've been Charlie's cue to go full Mommy Dom. Charlie knew the signs.

“Bitch it is, then,” Charlie said fetching a collar and leash she'd packed. It was a plain black leather collar and a black leash. After attaching them to Erik's thick neck as he kneeled, she wrapped the free end of the leash around her hand tightly, leading him to crawl in a circle before mounting his back and riding him across the aparthotel room. Henny looked on in shock as her usually sadistic and brolic dominant crawled back in forth on all fours like a masochist, arms bulging. Erik's eyes avoided hers in uncertainty. He had no reason to feel embarrassed, Henny wasn't judging like he thought. She was feeling it. If he looked up he'd see.

“Sub tonight or dom,” Charlie mouthed to Henny. It was either Dom or be dommed. To Charlie's surprise, she chose to sub. Magic words. “Hennessy. Why you got on clothes in my room?” Charlie asked aloud this time. “Where you think you bout to go? Take that shit off and stand right there,” Charlie pointed to an empty space, “Shoulders back, chin up, don't move.” She pulled the leash halting Erik's movements. “Park it,” she commanded and he sat kneeling on his heels in front of Henny in his briefs. Charlie climbed off and pulled his head back roughly by his ponytail. A look in Erik’s eyes showed his surprise as he looked up at Henny. Suddenly, he was really, really into this.

“Henny, put your leg over Erik's shoulder.” Charlie said dropping Erik's head. Henny threw her leg over his large shoulder and Erik looked to Charlie, hunger in his eyes. Charlie nodded her head, “Sick her!”

Like a wild animal, Erik attacked the junction between Henny's meaty thighs, his hands pulling her closer, gripping ass and thigh. He lapped at her entrance like it was life itself. Henny opened her mouth, sound welling up.

“Ah ah,” Charlie warned, “We have a rule. You speak or make a sound without permission? You get punished. If I were you, I wouldn't.”

“Shit,” Henny breathed in true bratty fashion. She couldn't control it. “Hennessy! I told you! Now you gotta take it for the next fifteen minutes and if you cum or talk or make a sound, your tongue is going in his ass. Don't worry, it's clean.” Charlie knew it was something Henny never wanted to do. She'd refuse, but that's why it was a punishment. Like, losing a dare. If she made a sound, Charlie would press her face right into Erik's ass and in this moment HE would do whatever Charlie said. This was the price of disobedience in King Jade's castle. Henny’s face twisted and distorted and her body writhed as Erik fed his hunger voraciously, but Charlie noticed humorously that she ain't make a peep.

“Alright, down boy,” Charlie said pulling the leash after fifteen minutes of watching. She was wet herself after watching Henny squirm. “You did good Henny! I'm proud of you. I'd have cum,” Charlie chuckled. She'd have been a goner after ten minutes the way her husband was eating. Good thing it wasn't her. “Henny. On your knees.” Henny dropped and kneeled, face to face with Erik. Charlie was high off of power. “Tongues out, both of you,” she said palming both of their heads and pushing them together. Their tongues twisted together aggressively pushing into each other's mouths, Erik trying to dominate Henny through use of his thick, long tongue. Charlie silently willed Henny to fight back, pushing her head and her tongue lashed out, battling fiercely. Erik was on rock, pitching a tent in his briefs. He reached out to grope Henny's full hanging breasts, unwilling to control himself.

“Nope,” Charlie swatted his hand and then his cheek with a slap. “Behave.” He groaned and it was another strike. Charlie yanked him back by his ponytail. “Henny wins!”

“Now Henny gets to cum, but how is the question.” Charlie rubbed her chin, plotting. Hennessy turned to Charlie, her big doe eyes shining with want.

“King Jade?” she purred.

“Yes Princess?”

“I want to ride,” she called back, staring hungrily at the tent in Erik’s pants.

“Erik. Lie on the bed on your back and be still, hands behind your head. Don't move. Henny. Straddle that dick. I want it to disappear in that pussy.” She waited for them to find their positions, watching Henny split herself on his pole. She knew the feeling and was laughing inside, the smile on her face clear. “You know you take that dick, don't bite your lip now,” Charlie teased pulling on Henny's bottom lip, freeing it. ”Now ride that dick. I wanna hear balls slapping ass every time you come down. When you come up, say ‘Thank you King Jade.’”

---

The words spilled from Henny’s lips like a prayer. If she’d known what she knew now, she would’ve asked this a long time ago. Seeing Erik in this way only made her desire for her beloved husband grow. It also made her more excited to know the kinds of things she’d have him doing when she was the one in control. He couldn't keep himself from moving under her, his hips thrusting desperately. His hands threatened to leave their positions and grab her, desperate to control the movements of her hips. She began to slow her pace as his thrusts began to falter under her, a tell-tell sign that he was close to his peak. She bounced a few more times, still singing praises to King Jade before hopping off, his glazed dick still pointing at the sky. If looks could kill, Hennessy would be dead on sight as Erik’s face twisted in a mixture of anger, confusion, and sexual desperation.

“Where the fuck you going?!” Charlie and Erik barked in unison. The little brat only giggled in response.

“He was about to cum, King Jade, and naughty boys don’t deserve to cum,” she replied with her most innocent smile. She had traces of Erik's sadism having been married to him for so long. Charlie nodded, in agreement with her logic.

“But good girls get multiple orgasms. Get yo ass back down. ERIK. Finish her. No hands. No dick.”

—

TAG LIST: @vibranium-soul @imagine-mbaku @mareethequeen @greennightspider @eriknutinthispoosy @hearteyes-for-killmonger @blackpantherismyish @muse-of-mbaku @shesfromwakanda @thehomierobbstark @wifeyofnjadaka @youreadthatright @tgigoldie @killmongersgurl @dameshaemonique @princessstevens @princesskillmonger @thickoreo @amethyst1993 @iamrheaspeaks @laketaj24 @bidibidibombaclaat @allhailnjadaka @whatmoredoyouwantamericaa @forbeautyandlife @yaachtynoboat711 @panthergoddessbast @inlovewithmakeupcomicsanimelove @dacreskars @thadelightfulone @drsunshine97 @wakanda-inspired @wawakanda-btch @hold-me-like-a-heart-beat @ayellepea @awkwardlyabstract @yoyolovesbucky @madamslayyy @blowmymbackout @vikkidc @littlesunflwrr @thekendollxo

THE HOUSEHOLD: @alyshastevens-udaku @wyldjuan @itsangeludaku @thehomiekillmonger @lovemecharlie @itskimorafireudaku @poosypoosy @bastioncarterstevens-udaku

#King Hennessy #King Jade #King Me #Dom/Sub Fic #Sub!Erik #Hennessy Chiron #Charlie Jade #The Household #The Kompound #my shit

[thebadguyalways-blog]

Bonnie & Clyde || Tom Riddle x Reader ♧part 2♧

When I woke up in the morning the first thing I thought about was the books I stole. I sat up straight and looked around. The dorm was empty. I yawned and reached over to my bag while looking at the clock that told me it was exactly 11.00am. Luckily, t was saturday. I opened the book on dark magic and skipped a few pages until I came across something that peaked my interest.

Horcruxes.

I've read about them numerous times before. I have however never fully been able to understand how one makes a horcrux. I knew it involved splitting the soul but the next page was ripped out of the book. I yawned again while closing the book. I looked at my bag and picked up the book on Voodoo rituals.

I carelessly flipped through the pages, not really paying attention to the titles of different rituals. I was with my head somewhere else until suddenly a small spark shot through my middle finger. It didn't hurt. I in fact am nit even completely sure if I even felt it. It was more mental than physical. I looked at the page I was on and read the title.

'Wither away evil love spells and restore ones ability to love normally'

I was quite intrigued to be honest. Even though I was pretty sure I wasn't under a love spell, something told me that it would come in handy.

'Make a solid heart-shaped form out of dough or clay and carve the name of the person who cursed you.'

This wasn't like any of the magic we were thought in school. It was almost like a religion.

'Under the moon a day prior to the full moon dig a hole and put the heart in. And squeeze the lemon over it.'

I read the entire ritual and then closed the book with a sigh.

I put both books away and dressed myself and brushed my teeth before walking out of the dorms and into the surprisingly empty common room. Then it hit me and I rolled my eyes.

The first Hogsmeade weekend. There were three in a year. Some students have complained it wasn't enough. Others like myself think there are too many. I never really go. Got nobody to sign my permission slip so what can you do. I went to sit on one of the love chairs in the corner of the room rather than the couch in the center.

I looked around the empty common room to make sure nobody was there and grabbed the book on dark magic again since the voodoo one kinda creeped me out a little bit.

I tried again to find some more information that I wanted on horcruxes but was again unsuccesful. It was all for recreational purpouses ofcourse.

I heard some news in the corridors that muggles were dealing with some kind of criminal couple. They go town to town robbing banks and shops. The woman -I think her name is Bonnie Parker- is said to keep going on and on about how she wants to be remembered for a long time after she dies. She wants everyone to know her name. That's why they cause so much mayhem and chaos together. To be known by the people.

I wanna be remembered when I die. Also not just by friends. But by everyone. But in the wizarding world things like that are more complicated than just robbing a few banks and killing 3 or 4 people. I'm gonna have to achieve something big. But Bonnie and Clyde were my OTP. Even if thhey were muggles.

In that moment right then I decided that I in fact wanna be remembered and known by everyone. And I was gonna do anything to achief my goal. Causing mayhem and chaos isn't an exception.

I flipped through the pages again mindlessly thinking about something huge I could achief that will put my name in the history books when I was snapped out of my thoughts by the closing of the common room door.

I quickly closed the book and hid it behind my back. I looked up to see a pissed looking Tom Riddle walking into the common room. He was looking at me and raised an eyebrow.

"What were you holding?" He asked spitting every word with annoyance framing it.

"Um a book, what did it look like?" I asked sarcasticly.

"Don't act funny, what is the title of the book." He asked.

I rolled my eyes.

"Why are you so mad? And why do you wanna know what I'm reading?"

Tom huffed and walked over to me at a fast angry pace.

"I was in the library and I noticed my book was missing." He said.

"Um, it's a library. Students get books there all the time. Now if what you're getting at is that I happen to have the book you're looking for I'd tell you to leave because I really don't think you'd be into these kinds of books." I told him.

Why the fuck would he want a book on dark magic? This boy has the highest grade in all our classes, what can't he do with normal magic, that he can do with dark magic.

He narrowed his eyes for a moment.

"Just tell me the title of the book and I'll leave you alone." He negotiated.

I sighed. I was 100% sure I didn't have his book.

"I can't." I said honestly.

He raised his eyebrows as if asking me what the fuck I was getting at.

I sighed.

"You'll think I'm psycho, and you'll tell everyone and then I'll get in trouble." I explained.

He smirked slightly.

"I won't. Just show me the book (Y/L/N)" He sighed. The small smirk still present.

I groaned. "Fine" I said and slowly got the book from behind my back.

I handed it to him and he stared at it. His smirk was growing bigger. "What's a girl like you doing with a book on dark magic?" He asked.

I rolled my eyes. "You've seen the cover, may I have my book back now?" I asked him keeping my eyes on the book.

"No." he said.

I looked at him. He still had the smirk on his face with one eyebrow raised higher than the other.

"You said you wouldn't tell anyone and leave me alone." I said in a little bit more of a whine than I intended.

He chuckled.

"That's not why you're not getting it back." He stated. "You're not getting it back because it's mine."

I narrowed my eyes trying not to let him notice how surprised I was.

"What does someone like you need with black magic." I asked.

He raised his brows. "What do you mean 'someone like me'?" He asked.

"You know... someone that's good at every class and probably one of the most powerful students here." I described. "I'm just trying to say that you probably don't need black magic to make you a better wizard"

His facial expression turned into a amused one.

"You're oblivious to the fact that you are the second best student in Hogwards. No?"

"What does that mean?" I asked.

"That you have the best grade in herbology, transfiguration, divination and care of magical animals." He said "And you're second best in the rest of them exept for history of magic where you're third." he finished.

My mouth fel agape.

"How-" I started to ask.

"I wanted to know who I should see as a threat." He answered.

I stared at him. Right then was the first moment in my life that I couldn't read someones expression. Was he joking? Was he serious? Should I be worried?

"Don't worry." He said "I realised I'd much rather have you as an ally."

He stepped closer and sat down on the other love seat in front of me. He leaned over and placed his elbows on his knees folding his hands in front of him.

"Interesting." I said with an unnoticable yawn and put my elbow on the chair arm and leaned my head on my hand. "Tell me more." I said.

Riddle smiled.

"I wanna do something big." he said "Something bad."

I grinned at the way he was describing his plan. "Acting all mysterious are we?" I asked.

He shot me a glare.

"I've been watching you, (Y/L/N), for a while now. You have potential." He said.

I smirked. "And may I ask what exactly I have potential for?" I asked.

He shrugged and leaned back in the chair. "Still figuring that out." He said "All I know is that you're too special to stay unnoticed your entire life. You have to be known. A name everyone knows but is too afraid to speak. The persom every mother warns her child about. A face that lets everyone know that the world is ours. That's (Y/N) (Y/L/N), the queen of darkness, the dutchess of chaos, my Dark Lady."

He had his way with speech. Everyone knew that. This vision of his spoke to me in a way that no one other could. Even if someone else had the same vision, ideas or believes as Riddle. No one knew how to put his thoughts into words like he did. It impressed me, to say the least. I was high on the idea of being known, maybe feared by every single witch and wizard. 'His Dark Lady' I repeated in a whisper. I was als so impressed by the way he could actually make me believe him for a second. Even though I didn't doubt his believes. His intentions were another story. He wouldn't lie. He had too much pride, too big of an ego to lie about his plans. He just leaves a lot of his plan out. I know for a fact that he didn't tell me everything. I pity everyone who was truly stupid enough to trust Tom Riddle.

"What exactly is your plan?" I asked.

Riddle tutted while shaking his head. "You're going to have to prove you are trustworthy first." He said.

I rolled my eyes. "How." I asked. He smirked. "That's for me to know and for you to find out." He said before standing up and walking towards the door.

"Wait!" I called after him.

He turned around and looked at me expectantly.

"Will you tell me about horcruxes?"

[bowieisworried]

Good very late morning and a happy sunday i hope you can relax today!

Ah it's always sad when you stop keeping up with a group you really like(d) but then you find a new one to get excited about and that's always a great boost of serotonin so i guess that's just the circle of life .. or kpop or sth haha

My very professional google form tells me 44.8% of my biases are still rappers and 37.9% are vocals i wasn't expecting it to be so close lmao

The hand prints!!! i always love broken wing imagery and that one Really did it for me

good storytelling is always the thing that draws me in the quickest. That's the biggest reason i got into kpop starting with bts because back then they still had these overarching plot lines in their mvs and they were so well done and it was so much fun coming up with theories... i miss that a lot tbh

but at least txt is doing an epic magical story! and i can always go back and watch old mvs...

oh have you ever watched monsta x All In mv? it's an absolute masterpiece and the storytelling is amazing!

watching rtk i didn't think i'd ever get into tbz but then i also watched kingdom (legendary war blabla) this year and now i know all their names idk what happened i blacked out for a month or two i think lmao

As for my favourite rtk performance you Know i have to say come back home bUT that's too easy so i'll say LIT simply because they gave seoho a rap part and i started screaming when i saw it for the first time

i'm a simple rap stan as we have established, it's very easy to get me excited

how about you?

That gifset!!!! yEs i know how he got u haha gosh that mv is so Powerful and the choreography is insaneee

i shall debut was A Lot i'm not gonna lie but i always use variety/reality shows to get into the groups and learn their names so it was okay. tbh it had nothing on the confusion of watching Going Seventeen when i only knew like 6/13 members dhdjhh it's fun also always gives me an excuse to watch the same stuff again later because i know i didn't understand all the inside jokes and stuff yknow

do you have a favourite way of getting to know group members?

I think you'll be happy to know i spent yesterday on the couch showing a friend Every oneus mv and she absolutely loved it.

We Got One Folks!!! i started with tbontb and come back home (obviously) and she was Hooked from the first 10 seconds it was so much fun!

Have a lovely day <33

~ santa

Hello! It's evening for me now because I've spent all day packing for a move lol

Yeah, I don't really know why it happened either. I liked the two comebacks since I got into them, but I just ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Oh that is actually pretty high for the rappers!

Ah, I know someone else who got into kpop for BTS as well. Same as you, they miss the quality plot and whatnot. I'd never seen (or even heard) All In, but I just watched it, it was great! Monsta X actually had one of the first kpop MV's that left an impression on me when my mate was sending a bunch of stuff to me. The 'Find You' MV. It was brilliant.

Oh my god xD The Boyz really rocked it on RTK, shame they couldn't keep the momentum on Kingdom. I have no idea how you've managed to get all their names down though, there's too many of them for me lol.

Ooooh LIT, yes! Loved that Seoho got his rap part, honestly he needs more, he's so good at it. My favourite... either Be Mine or the collab stage they did (cannot remember the name). I'm a massive Shakespeare nerd so Be Mine hooked me, and then their collab stage was just really touching.

Hahaha, they really can be a lot in the beginning but they are good for getting to know folk, especially their personalities and stuff. Seventeen are another group that I 100% will never get down. I can point out Scoups and... the American dude. Vernon? Apart from that though, nope. I think the second a group goes above 8 my brain just says "Nah man, leave them be." lmao

Hmm... sometimes I'll watch one or two of the silly "guide" videos on YouTube, they're a decent starting point when trying to get to know them. After that though, I tend to just pick up what YouTube recommends like variety show stuff, behind videos and things like that.

Yass!! Can't wait until they land up digging themselves deeper into the black hole that is Oneus content lol

Oh, just thought, do you have any Oneus (or kpop in general) albums? Would be cool to know who you pulled!

Have a good one :D

#ask #anon #santa #foroneus:ss #about me #text #not kpop