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obstinaterixatrix · 2 years

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2021 fic retrospective

yeah I'll reveal the paper mask. if you reference the relevant fics in any way other than a 500 word essay about how great they are I'll block you. 11 fics, technically... 53k? ish? but about half of that was through cowriting (lol)

2/6

“I can’t stay” and other lies to tell, ORV, 2.5k

Han Sooyoung adjusts to post-epilogue life.

this one gave me such a huge headache... but I really like it! fulfilled my goal of having ysa punch out hsy (romantically) which is the only thing that matters. I love writing hsy and ysa but they're both smart and well-read in exactly the way I'm not so It's A Struggle. I have to put so so much effort into having like... one of those hollywood western sets. flat storefronts propped up to mimic the impression of a whole-ass town. that's me trying to write these gals.

2/21

a home to keep (out of reach), Kamen Rider W, 1k

While on the run from the museum, Wakana runs into Akiko.

oh the femslash life of writing an obscure ship from obscure(-ish) source material that aired over ten years ago. this has less than 20 kudos and I'm surprised I even hit that high. if I remember right I was in a mood of 'I need to write more gals and don't have specific ideas, someone give me some' and thankfully my friends obliged. Love You Buds!

2/27

being known, being loved, and other disasters you’ll never recover from, ORV, 2.5k

“Use your words” was supposed to be a thoughtless taunt; Kim Dokja wasn’t expecting to get a monologue.

this one's great. 10/10. utter genius. well actually I wish someone else wrote it and could dig into all of the complex ideas I couldn't quite grasp and it's terrible and I hate it. so it goes with this kinda thing. regardless, it 100% would not have been as good as it was (or wasn't?) if racher didn't let me call her at my 2am and talk with me for like two hours as I wailed and wept through the 4th scene. thanks racher <3

3/18

two sides, same coin, SVS3, 2k

With this, Mobei Jun can finally rest reassured that their relationship is plagued by no lingering ambiguity.

At all.

None whatsoever.

technically I wrote this fic last year and thought it was finished, but was struck by a brief bout of inspiration (and/or madness)

5/12

going nowhere // gone nowhere, Infinity Train, 23k

Two versions of a reunion without the train.

Side A: Ryan gets a call from the Parks and rushes back to Min-Gi.

Side B: Min-Gi doesn't get a call from Ryan but rushes to him anyway.

lmaaaoooooo I love cowriting fic. I have nothing but fondness for this one. if this fic were a living creature I would dote endlessly upon it. what started as a direct and targeted attack against lex got turned around on me and suddenly We Were Both In It... Together. 10/10, fantastic cowriting experience, lex expanded on a lot that I would've glossed over and really nailed a lot of solid vibes. I had a lot of fun breaking ryan's leg. speaking of, also big thanks to kly for the med reference (lol)

6/6

actually, that was a load-bearing wall, Persona 5, 2.3k

Makoto: Ryuji, how did you get injured? Is there anything we can do? Yusuke: He did not. Makoto: …Wait, why is Yusuke with you at the hospital?

sundry wrote all this, I just edited & spruced it up by making the texting segment look ✨phenomenal✨ (and after it was a prompt for me to write too, lol).

7/28

dreams not to keep, Infinity Train, 2.5k

Min-Gi has a weird stress dream about working at Dumpty's, one that is definitely meaningless and has nothing to do with complicated feelings that don't exist.

If I'm being transparent I had this vaguely drafted without any real intention of finishing it, then saw a dead dove fic in the tag that I found personally rancid, so I finished it out of spite just to bump it down. anyway I love dream sequences and psychological torment. this is a concept that was inspired by air and that I also drew to specifically antagonize lex (lol)

9/20

a door closed to light, Deltarune, 1k

There’s no good reason for Susie, of all people, to be barging into Noelle’s room. And it makes no sense why she’s the one who ends up doing it; Kris is the childhood friend—which makes them the obvious choice for a stupidly sappy rescue—and Ralsei’s like… basically one of those baby blankets, the kind with a dumb fluffy stuffed animal attached. So shouldn’t he jump at the chance to make friends or be a goody-goody or whatever?

I was actually visiting a friend when deltarune chapter 2 dropped and carved out time to finish it. I always knew noelle and susie would have more Solid Vibes when the game progressed, and I was right! the vibes are solid! thank you toby fox for being the number one lesbian ally that exists. but also since I was rushing so much I ended up missing a great opportunity for a joke and had to rush to change the ending (rip).

10/8

the unnamed ember that burns in your chest, SVS3, 1.5k

Mobei Jun takes a nap on Shang Qinghua’s bed and pines to a truly intolerable degree.

do you understand how agonizing it was for me to have a paper mask account that I wouldn't let myself reference at all AND YET I kept coming up with titles that absolutely slapped. are you kidding me. this was so goddamn romantic. fuck.

10/22

the rays of the protagonist’s golden halo don’t shine on us lowly side characters, so how about easing up on the collateral damage (you bastard), SVS3, 2k

Shang Qinghua and Shen Qingqiu have a fight after Mobei Jun gets injured while helping the protagonist (who, let’s be honest, would’ve been fine no matter what).

DO YOU UNDERSTAND. HOW AGONIZING IT WAS. FOR ME TO HAVE A PAPER MASK ACCOUNT I WOULDN'T LET MYSELF REFERENCE AT ALL. AND YET. I KEPT COMING UP WITH TITLES THAT ABSOLUTELY SLAPPED. I'm absolutely entranced by my own unrecognized genius. anyway this was fun I love writing petty squabbles and asshole friendships lol

12/30

as it turns out, dying isn’t the romantic gesture you might think it is, SVS3, 15k

Shang Qinghua wasn’t a protagonist. He was barely even a side character. The sum total of his dialogue never surpassed ten lines, which puts him just above cannon fodder. His death, sudden but not unexpected, was less than a paragraph in the epic of Luo Binghe:

The conspicuous absence of the man who could be considered Mobei Jun’s shadow was then explained to Luo Binghe. Just days ago, Shang Qinghua—whether by accident or a final act of loyalty—took a fatal blow meant for Mobei Jun. Scarcely did he have the time to draw a single breath before succumbing to poison potent enough to fell a great demon on the verge of becoming king.

In his previous life as a reader, Mobei Jun didn’t have any reason to pay him much attention.

Things are different now.

BLAH BLAH BLAH TITLES THAT ABSOLUTELY FUCKING SLAPPED YOU KNOW THE DRILL anyway this is literally the longest solo project I've written in years, usually you can't get me over 5k without my corpse being dragged by someone else. I'm a 2k oneshot kinda gal! I hate writing longform! it's so much work! so much effort! and yet! this fic drove me absolutely fucking bonkers and would not let me rest until it was exorcised. it has the most vibes per vibe out of all my fics. it's my magnum opus. and it's quarantined to paper mask account because if I ever acknowledge it, it becomes agonizingly obvious that nfsftlots was me going like 'haha so this is what I think a mo/shang roleswap would be. wait a second I could make them lesbians. wait a second I could make them lesbian ocs. wait a second I've written a novella.' anyway the last chapter of this fic was what I consider 8k of absolute madness. I'm spilling my guts here. I am relentlessly shaking your shoulder. can you even begin to understand what this story has done to me. I am narcissus at the pond absolutely enthralled by myself. this is the exact type of confession I love to read. you can make some pretty obvious parallels to how I'm acting now and a certain character in the fic and you'd be right to but you cannot mention this to my face.

#writing ramble #fic retrospective

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sockablock · 6 years

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“Can you do 35 (bathtub fic) and 95 (sleep intimacy) for vaxleth? also its no rush or anything, I cant imagine the number of requests youve gotten.”

@bkfstprincess IM SORRY I DIDN’T FORGET ABOUT YOU I JUST SUCK SOMETIMES AND I REALLY WANTED TO MAKE THIS WORK I HOPE ITS OK

• • • • •

“Oh no, Vax’ildan,” Keyleth laughed, throwing a towel at his head from where she sat on the sheets, “you’re not getting into bed until you’ve dried your hair. Hurry up, or I’ll fall asleep without you.”

Vax lifted the cloth away from his face and pouted. “Aw, Kiki, come on! You’re the Voice of the Tempest! Just today you fought a kraken hundreds of feet deep in the ocean. A little water isn’t going to hurt you.”

Keyleth rolled her eyes. “It’s not official yet, you know. And maybe it won’t hurt, but it’ll definitely annoy me enough to keep me up all night.”

“Oh?” Vax grinned. “And what if that’s exactly what I want to do?”

She immediately shook her head. “No way, not tonight.”

"Shit,” he said immediately, “sorry, I should have—”

She balked and looked away. “No, no, it’s not that, it’s just, well...Vax, you shouldn’t be straining yourself.”

“Oh, that’s no problem,” he grinned, and cheekily tried to meet her gaze. “I mean, I certainly would like to.”

“No, no, you need to rest.”

“I’ve just gotten all the rest I need, though.”

“Oh, gods, Vax! Don’t joke like that.”

“Why not, Kiki?” he laughed. “What’s the harm in—”

Her head whipped up towards him, and he froze. His heart sank as suddenly saw her eyes, wide and heavy with grief.

“Shit,” he said again, softer this time. He dropped the towel and took a step closer. “Shit, I’m, um, I’m sorry, Keyleth.”

She shook her head again and sighed. “No, no, it’s alright,” she said, wiping the tears away. “I just...I don’t know why I feel like this. You’re right, we should be celebrating, I should be happy that you’re here.”

“Aw, jeez, no, Keyleth, you have every right to be upset. I mean...I was dead a few hours ago. And, and you had to deal with that.”

She snorted. “You had to deal with it more than I, Vax. You’re the one who...well...” Her shoulders slumped. “On my watch, too. I was supposed to be the leader. To keep us all safe. But then everything went so wrong and I had to leave our friends behind and they barely made it out, and, and...”

He joined her on the bed and she buried her face into his chest.

“I failed,” she murmured. “You died.”

“I’m not dead anymore,” he said softly, and rubbed a hand against her back. “You didn’t fail. And maybe the mission didn’t go as well as you’d have liked, but you learned from it, yes? You’ve grown, yes? And we’re all still here, yes?”

She nodded.

“Alright then,” he whispered. “Then it’s okay. In the end, that’s all we can hope for, yeah? And really, it’s all that matters.”

She slowly pulled away, wiped her cheeks with her sleeve. “The Raven Queen has seriously rubbed off on you,” she said.

He tried for a small smile. “Is that good?” he asked.

She raised an eyebrow. “I’m not completely sure yet, to be honest. I think so.”

“If it helps, there’s only one all-powerful force of nature, wrapped up into a beautiful goddess, in my heart.”

“Is that so?”

“Yes,” he grinned, and took her hands in his. “Her name is Keyleth of the Air Ashari, and she just finished her Aramente.”

A small spark glimmered in Keyleth’s eyes. “I did, didn’t I?” she said. “I did just finish my Aramente.”

He nodded, his smile grew wider. “You did, Kiki. You did.”

She giggled. “And you were right there with me, the whole way. Everyone was. We finished my Aramente, together.”

“Does this mean I get to be Voice of the Tempest too?”

She laughed this time, a loud and bright sound. “Maybe you should start small,” she said. “You can be the Voice’s right hand.”

He chuckled. “I think I could handle being the Voice’s shadow. Yeah, actually, that sounds pretty nice.”

“Really? That’s all you want?”

Vax leaned in, put his forehead against hers, spoke softly. “If it means I get to follow you for all eternity, and never leave your side? Then yes. It is all I want.”

She stroked his cheek. “What did I do to deserve you?”

“Oh, I don’t know,” he whispered. “You put up with my sister, that’s a big one. And you’ve healed me more times than I can count, and you’ve always been patient with me, and there was that one time we both tied bows into Trinket’s fur—”

She pulled back, laughing again. “I see,” she said. “Well, you certainly know the way to a woman’s heart, huh?”

“And a man’s,” Vax quipped. “But at the moment, I think, those skills won’t be too necessary.”

Keyleth smiled, but then the expression faded just slightly. “I really do think we should try to easy tonight, though, just in case. Is...is that alright?”

Vax nodded immediately. “Of course,” he said. “You’re usually right about these things anyhow.”

“And it might be nice to just...be still, for a while.”

“Right.”

“Although,” she said, “although there is one thing I need you to do for me.”

“Anything, Kiki.”

She nodded. “Wonderful. Go dry your hair.”

There was a moment’s pause.

“After everything I just said? All those beautiful words and praises just for you, Keyleth? After all of my undying love and adoration? You’re really going to make me get up and get that towel off the floor and spend the next half an hour drying my hair when I could be deep in your beautiful arms?”

“Yes, yes, hurry up, now. I’m tired, and this lovely bed is getting cold.

He gave her a long, offended stare. Then he stood up and theatrically skulked across the room.

And then, after a good forty-five minutes, he climbed back into bed, let Keyleth drape herself around him, curled up into the warmth between her arms, and soon, they both fell asleep.

And then after that, after they had both woken up a few hours later and decided together that perhaps, perhaps maybe sleep wasn’t the best way to celebrate the night after all, perhaps they should allow a little strain and a little excitement instead, well then, in that case, perhaps maybe they pushed the covers down and perhaps maybe they welcomed a bit of fun into the evening.

And then after that, perhaps it is true that a large metal construct carefully opened their door, scared the ever-loving shit out of the both of them, cheerfully scribbled down a series of incredibly detailed brushstrokes, and swiftly bolted, shutting the door gently behind it.

And then, and then, more-or-less, after the bewildered exclamations and the exhausted sighs, the confused ranting and the resigned laughter, finally, after that, then finally, the night was theirs and theirs alone, again.

• • • • •

aaaaand, that’s a wrap on the 1k follwers fic requests! Thank you guys so so much for sending them in! I had a ton of fun with each one, and it was an amazing amazing challenge to do. I might open up the ol’ inbox again for the next milestone (i already know what I want to do) and I really hope you guys enjoyed reading these! All in all, I wrote 30 over the last month, most in the first two weeks and then i waited forever to finish this last one (sorry again!) Mostly campaign 2, with a few 1′s thrown in for color. You guys knocked it out of the park, and I feel so lucky to have such wonderful followers!

If you’d like to read them all, click here! If you feel like funding my writerly activities, please consider a coffee right here! Thanks again and <333 y’all

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