#she's got the Tyra Banks smize

[fatefulfaerie]

Truth Or Dare

A happy May birthday to @ninjaboysc !! I hope you like it!

“Truth,” Zelda said, amongst the clatter of the bar, clinking glasses, conversations loud yet out of earshot, drunk cheers for birthdays and unbirthdays alike.

Urbosa tipped her head slightly, and leveled Zelda with green eyes that bled with equal parts attitude and disbelief.

“Come on,” Urbosa said. “You’ve chosen truth every time. Stop playing it safe.”

“Okay fine,” Zelda relented, submitting to the pressure. She held her hands in surrender. “Dare away.”

Mipha leaned in after sipping at her Long Island Iced Tea, an uncharacteristic smirk on her face. This red-haired graduate student with warm hazel eyes and the sweetest demeanor got quite mischievous when alcohol was in her system.

“You see that guy over there,” Mipha said with a slight upward nod, as if gesturing with her chin for the trio to look over.

It was a trio of guys, two blondes and one with a dyed dark blue and a mess of small braids. One of the blondes was leaner, but fit, with startling ocean-blue eyes and hair that was more sandy. The other blonde was a platinum blonde with spiky hair. Boy Band spiky. Maybe they were in a band.

“Anime, Emo, or Short Legolas?” Urbosa asked, “you’ve got to specify, Miph.”

“Short Legolas,” Mipha clarified. “He has one of those ‘Kiss Me I’m Irish’ buttons on. It would be a shame if at least one of us didn’t take him up on it.”

It was tacky. Today was St. Patrick’s Day, and it was still tacky.

“Yeah, no,” Zelda said, turning back into the table..

“Why not?” Urbosa questioned. “He’s cute.”

“I’m not going up to a stranger and kissing them, no matter how cute they are.”

“Well I officially dare you,” Mipha said. “We can even bar hop immediately afterwards if you want a quick exit.”

Zelda gave a deep sigh and contemplated as she stared into her iced water. She then bit her bottom lip before looking up at Mipha.

“He is pretty cute,” Zelda admitted.

Zelda knew she had never done anything this outgoing in her whole life as she slid out of the barstool. But she fisted her hands and convinced herself that yes, she could do this. Nevermind that she had never kissed anyone before. It was an embarrassing fact she didn’t want to admit to her friends. The past 22 years of her life she had been so focused on school and studying and career stuff that romance had no place.

“Lame,” she could hear Urbosa saying. So Zelda made up a first kiss story for one of her truths. It was a lie.

It wasn’t that she didn’t want romance, it just never came up. This right there was to prove to herself that yes, she could get behind the whimsy of romance, she could pull it off and be a woman men swoon for, not just catcall on the street.

Also this Irish guy wasn’t just cute, he was capital H HOT. Her two redhead friends had no idea, but Zelda had been stealing shy glances all night. But, she couldn’t be shy and meek now.

Come on Zelda, strut, strut like you are one of those drama queens on America’s Next Top Model. Smize like Tyra Banks. Act like you’re worth it. Be confident. They won’t know what hit them. They won’t know it’s a facade of bravery.

The trio of young men laughed as Zelda approached, but not at her. One of them had said something funny. She disregarded all her hesitation, and tried not to think about Urbosa and Mipha behind her, watching, snickering.

The guys barely turned their heads before Zelda planted one on the Irish guy by taking command of the back of his neck.

She heard the laughing scoff of disbelief of one of his friends, but she didn’t care. Her heart swelled and she fell in love with the sensation of kissing another human being, especially when the stranger started kissing her back.

It never got farther than chaste, and lasted only a few seconds. Then, Zelda denied herself the gaze of his beautiful iridescent eyes and turned on her heel with quite a bit of sass in her flipped hair and her walk straight out of the bar doors, as if that was always her exit plan.

Her false confidence lasted until the second the doors closed, Urbosa and Mipha meeting her. Their combined excited yelps echoed down the street and they jumped up and down, before of course remembering their quick getaway.

The designated driver for the evening, Zelda singled out the correct key for the car and helped the two tipsy redheads into the back seats. She opened the door on the driver’s side, got a single leg in and…

“Hey!”

Zelda peeked her head out and sighed in annoyance. HE was jogging out to meet her.

“It was a dare, okay?” She said, with one hand on the car door. The young man slowed his jog to a stop. “I’m not that kind of girl.”

“And what kind of girl is that?” He asked. “That you’re not.”

“I’m not easy,” Zelda said. “I’m no floozy, I am 100% sober, and I am not copulating tonight.”

He smiled, and bowed his head as he chuckled. He looked back up. His eyes sparkled with the stars.

“Well I’m not as smart as you,” he said. “But if I know one thing, I know that I just met the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen, and I would kick myself tomorrow if I didn’t get the number of the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen.”

Zelda sat on that for a bit, just staring and breathing with the car door open. She willed her cheeks not to blush.

Without a word, she stepped onto the curb and closed the car door.

She stepped forward and offered her hand. He wasn’t sure what to do with it, and lifted his own, uncertain. Zelda rolled her eyes.

“Not your hand, your phone,” Zelda said.

“Oh.” He reached in his pocket, and it was apparent he wasn’t trying to hide his blush. After a bout of typing (who voluntarily has the click sounds for their keyboard on?), Zelda returned the phone and walked back to the car.

“Not A Booty Call?” She heard him ask as she walked. “I don’t get a name?”

“You asked for a number,” Zelda said, walking backwards to face him while she said. “Not a name.”

“But it’s your number, right?” He asked. Zelda smiled.

“Try it,” she dared, before hopping in her car and closing the door, making sure the window was rolled down.

Link never thought he’d be so happy to hear the sound of the standard phone ringtone, even as it faded down the street.

#zelink #modern au #botw au

[cactus-cate-blog]

My cat is so photogenic it’s ridiculous

#she knows her angles #she's got the Tyra Banks smize #cat #cats of tumblr #cat photography #photography #lensblr #photographers on tumblr #original photography #annoyed at that one picture where the sun wasn't behind a cloud but the angle was good

[mercuryislove]

can you tell me about ur oc's smiles. any number of em any ones you want. we need some smiles today. <3

i got you!!!!! <333

(okay I'm very excited about this because it gives me a reason to also talk about the way they laugh lol)

When Ciaran smiles and he means it, it's so wide that his nose wrinkles and he squints. He smiles with his whole damn face and he smiles like all the fucking time, so he has laugh lines around his eyes that he doesn't notice or care about. He also sticks his tongue out a little bit if he's laughing. Also. You know that post that's like “I hate people who touch me when they laugh hard like unhand me you raggedy bitch”?? (it cracks me up SO much because I am the raggedy bitch that grabs people when I laugh.......) Anyway. That's Ciaran. He laughs loud and hard and snorts sometimes and is the kind of guy to grab someone's arm. and he doesn't care when people think it's weird.

Meanwhile Anwei has mastered the art of both smizing (thank u tyra banks) AND smilling only with her mouth. She can basically have two different facial expressions at once (bc she's a fucking weirdo). Her like “professional” smile is very demure. Shows no teeth, barely counts as a smile, would be perfect for photo ops. But her real smile is sooooo beautiful. She has extremely kind eyes and a warm smile and basically it can win the heart of everyone in a five mile radius. She doesn't share the same like. nose wrinkling, sore cheek smile that her brother does but it's still infectious and friendly and people love to see it.

OH AND THEN the fucking. omg. the Sovereign aka the most beautiful man on earth wtf. What is the thing they say about like. helen of troy or whatever. That she was so beautiful a thousand ships sailed for her or some shit. Well. His smile is so gorgeous that a thousand AND ONE ships would sail for him. I'm talking words can't even describe this man. You see him smile and it's like being welcomed into the arms of a lover or best friend. You could get lost in it (which is also kind of the point because he IS the perfect charismatic, hypnotic, magnetic uh killing machine). You WANT to get lost in it. People get light headed if they look at him too long. like. he IS the moment.

#oc talk #i gotta say..... it's hard to describe smiles. #also i seriously considered sitting down and describing every single character's smile but that would take. a long time. #there are a lot of them lol #thank you for sending this in friend :3 i hope these are the smiles you need

[rkwendy]

It’s Photo Time!

Son Seungwan  AND*ROMA September Evaluation

Teaser photos.

Holy shit. Things are getting real indeed. Wendy’s used to having her picture taken, but the last time she participated in a shoot like this was back when they shot the Love Wishes video almost three years ago. 

She flashes a smile at the camera, like she had been instructed to do. She tries her best to capture the camera’s gaze, like she had been trained to do in her modeling workshops. There’s also the lessons she got from the many seasons and editions of the Next Top Model franchise that she had consumed all her life. She does her best to smize, as Miss Tyra Banks herself would say. 

[ tw: negative body image ] 

Despite focusing and having fun, a nagging thought rings in Wendy’s mind. She’s aware that she’s debuting with a bunch of very attractive girls with distinct faces. Whereas, she’s definitely the plainest and most ordinary looking among them all. She used to think she was pretty until she started competing in figure skating. Besides being surrounded by so many pretty girls, there was always the pressure to be perfect.

When she got to Korea, she had all the more realized how plain and ordinary she was. What’s the use of looking like she did when she was just going to be overshadowed by girls who were perfect? She supposed that she can still sing, but what good is that? The people want a pretty face, which she apparently doesn’t have. She honestly doesn’t know how the hell she made it up to this point. 

She supposes she might as well make up for her lack fo looks with something else. God had to be fair after all right? As long as the photographer hasn’t hurled any insults at her, she should be fine. She gives the stronger expression the photographer wants. 

“Relax your face a little,” the photographer says with a chuckle. “You’re a confident young lady, not a serial killer.” 

Wendy can’t help the burst of laughter she lets out. Her members are also there, making her laugh and smile with their comments as well. All of this works wonders in removing her negative thoughts. She gamely poses for the camera again. She may not be the prettiest member in the team, but she’s going to make damn sure her photos come out well. 

#and*roma:sepeval #ssw;novachronicles #ssw;and*roma #[ in today's episode of trying to get back into the swing of things ]

[kchatjjigae]

Another big day in Kdramaland! We’re counting down the last hours of Leila’s stay in Korea with a march through the city. We get all classy and cultural with tours of a few palaces, one we meant to and one on accident, get our Coffee Prince on while we chase away some hanger, then activate our idol hunting skills as we cross the river back into Gangnam on a hunt for JYP. The offices, not the man. All this before we hit the critical point of our day: Korean Pizza. 

So, so, so many pictures ahead. 

Unlike the leaving of Alix, we knew right from the start of planning the trip that Leila wasn’t going to be with us the entire time the three of us planned on staying. Leila knows precisely at what length journeys stop being fun for her and plans accordingly. It was part of the reason we chose to hit Busan first over Seoul as it would be easier for her to get back to her plane. I’m not certain I’m the person who can leave when I know that other people are still there, having fun without me, but I do admire her for her strength to say “Naw, Bishes, I’m done.” Especially now knowing that she was doing these last few days on a sprained toe. 

As I mentioned in the last post, this day was going to be a Leila and I date, where we toured the palaces, possibly the Hannok Village, and any other old thing we wanted to see that SaraG and Alix had already seen before. It’s not that they don’t appreciate them, but as they’d seen them before, they thought they’d fill their time with new experiences instead. We were all, you do you boos, we’re gonna get our saeguk on. 

Now with the change in our numbers, SaraG has decided to join us! 

With a quick consult to the Naver Maps, we head back towards the palaces, thankfully, at the palaces subway stop. Throughout the station, as we headed above ground, I saw adverts for their palaces museum, which said it had some of the clothing and regalia in residence. Unfortunately, I didn’t make it there, and it’s probably one of my biggest niggling regrets. I’m sure if I’d just said, hey, I really want to go here, the ladies would have been fine with it, but at the time it didn’t seem important enough to make a fuss. That’s okay, it will give me something to go to next time! 

You know, when I go visit the whole giant palace WE ACCIDENTALLY MISSED. 

So we popped above ground and SaraG decided she wanted to hit up the coffee shop next to the palaces where she’d catch up on life now that she has a phone back and wait for us to do our thing.

As we approached Gyeongbokgung Palace, the main royal palace during the Joseon Dynasty, built 1395, the sun was bright and warmer than when we’d been there previously. So the hanboks were aplenty. Here I should probably mention, surrounding these historical areas are hanbok rental shops, where you go in and get dressed in period clothing, rented by the hour.  If you do, not only do you have a fantastic experience, but your entry to the inner palace is free. As we wandered the grounds, this totally makes sense! Watching the people walk around in hanboks really adds to the atmosphere, helps you picture what it would have been like during the Joseon dynasty. Just with less slavery and more selfies.

There was a hot minute where Leila and I had talked about doing this, but as things had changed in the dynamic and, frankly, I wasn’t up for another ahjumma belly pat-down, we decided to pass. Maybe next time. 

On our way in, we spotted a photoshoot going down to what we imagined is an up and coming girl group. You could tell between shots they were freezing in their outfits, their puffy coats tossed to the side, but they took it like troopers. I wonder how those shots turned out.

The outer courtyard was just as beautiful as before, but this time it was even more exciting as we got to go in! Well, after we purchased our very cheap tickets. I did have a moment of GAH when at the self-automated booth, my credit card was declined. There is nothing quite like that moment of panic when that happens. 

Side note. When you’re in Korea, or, I guess, anyplace overseas, use your credit card, not your bank card. I actually went into my bank to talk about this with them about how best to pay for things. I ordered some won beforehand but had planned on just using my bank card while I was there. My bank said that there are actually more fees attached if you do it that way, however, there are no extra fees if you use your credit card. So that’s what I did. I just got cash a couple of times using my bank card, but primarily used the card, just transferring my savings right over to it once I got home.

We ended up having to go through the person manned line where, after hesitatingly giving my card over with crossed fingers, I had no problems getting our tickets.

As it was early, the place wasn’t hugely packed, so we wandered around the buildings on our own, deciding to forgo a guided tour. BIG MISTAKE! Oh sure, we got along fine, had no troubles, but when we saw the cute little school-aged tour guides working on their English skills to other tourists? We were beyond jealous! (We also missed Steve.)

How epic is this?

You’d think by now the experience would be old. The same architecture, the same colors, the same carvings that we’d seen in Busan. But, there’s just something being around all that history, something that has survived, in one form or another, for all these years that’s just fascinating to me. You picture all the things that went on. How was this even created? Built? How did they choose these colors? The toppers at the corners of buildings I couldn’t’ stop looking at.

I also couldn’t stop talking in the formal saeguk accent, which I’m sure was annoying, but I couldn’t stop. 

Check out this throne.

Now picture your favorite Kdrama saeguk hero perched upon it. Do you have a favorite? Share, please! 

Not sure what this is, but it has flowers and faces on the knees. Who does that? It had to be something important. Unless it was just some arts and craft gift to some king of old and he stuck it there because his niece painted it and he’s a good uncle who simply made up some vital reasoning for it to be there. Who’s going to argue? He’s a king!

See how much fun I am to travel with? That’s the sort of brilliance I come up with.

We wandered the endless maze of rooms, of separate buildings, trying to make sure we got through everything we wanted to see. Seriously though? I could probably spend hours there just going through every nook and cranny. Taking each tour, finding out precisely what that thing with the face knees was. 

Seriously, look at this ceiling!

Watching the young girls work industriously on their selfies, again I was reminded that a good selfie is hard work. You want to be all judgy, but they were having so much fun trying different, unique poses, giggling with their friends, all dressed up prettily in hanboks, and it just looked like fun. Plus, they are going to have some great photos later!

And the girls weren’t the only ones in on the game.

As I was saying in the previous post, the fact that this exists in the middle of ultra technologically advanced Seoul is pretty amazing. Seeing all of this history while on the edges you see high rises and electronic billboards, is the perfect blend of the past and the future. Which, in a nutshell, is the ideal description of South Korea itself.

Some areas were busier than others, a few school trips, but everyone was friendly and pretty respectful.

There was another lake in the middle of the grounds.

We were working our way towards a large pagoda in the background as we didn’t really have a map to go along. It’s like when I lived in New York City — just keep the Empire State Building in sight, and you’ll always know where you are. We tried to get to the pagoda but couldn’t seem to find our way, eventually giving up and turning back instead checking out the lake as it was on our way back and people were getting hungry. 

As hanger is a very real thing, we decided to be along our way, to meet up with SaraG, but not before a quick stop off at the bathroom (yes, I have now peed in every single royal palace. Its a thing.) and the gift shop, before heading back to the front. 

But not before one more selfie and one more…weird experience.

We stood in front of my camera… side note: Fun Stephanie Fact of the post? I have very long arms. While it’s a bitch to make sure shirts fit, on the upside? I’m brilliant with group selfies. It’s where I really carry my weight on trips, also why you see my smiling mug front and center on every group shot. I’m not an attention whore, just monkey-like.

So we’re standing there with my camera, and this guy comes up to us and asks if we’d like him to take our picture. Delighted, we said yes and handed him my phone. Posing, we smile in front of the first building where he begins to take photo after photo, crouching into the ground, bending himself in half, moving the camera around, like we’re shooting some sort of album cover. We’re just standing there, smiling, feeling more and more hilariously awkward as he slowly inches forward to us. Should we be moving? Should we be practicing our posing? Are we now disappointing Tyra Banks with our lack of Smizing? Is this guy going to steal my phone?

Finally, he hands me back my phone and with a smile and a bow, simply walks away as we shout thank yous out to him. 

What a weird-fun experience.  

From there, we met up with SaraG, and we decided to wander the neighborhood looking for food and the Changdeokgung Palace, which is known for being the one with the Secret Garden. However, finding food wasn’t as easy as we anticipated and we walked and walked, circling the edges of Gyeongbokgung. We were turning into a more residentially neighborhood and were despairing we’d never find food. Then we found a cute little coffee shop on the corner of an intersection, said good enough and tramped in. There was, in fact, bistro-style food, so we sat there, basking in the sunlight, recharging those batteries, taking a moment just to hang and chat. It was lovely.

Side note. Sitting at a ShareTea drinking bubble tea writing this. It’s post-move, I’m exhausted from a solid week of non-stop, my house is in disarray, so while this post will be late, it’s for a good reason and taking the time to write it is actually giving me a much-needed rest. What makes me think of this is my previous statement: It was lovely, which comes straight from what I hear from the song playing over the shops loudspeakers. 

But now back to it because it really is driving me crazy my house is such a mess. 

Where were we? Ah, a random neighborhood in Seoul. Batteries charged enough to move, we got to our feet and continued onto where we thought the second palace was. Spoiler alert? It was not where we thought it was. We may have done a little shopping in some boutiques as we passed, nothing serious, just some meandering. Looking up, we realized we were right outside the Hannok village, which was straight uphill, up a butt-ton of stairs. Leila noped it and while I was initially disappointed, it was pointed out we had actually been there a few days ago when Alix marched us through on the Kpop shop lookout. We consulted Naver maps again and realized we’d actually walked out of the palace in completely the wrong direction. Feet being what they were, we couldn’t face walking all the way back and then onto the palace. Luckily we were right by a bus stop which appeared to be able to take us right to where we wanted to go and was even more luckily enough to be placed right next to a Churro shop.

Churro in hand, or, more realistically, churro in mouth, we boarded the bus on our way to the next palace.

We passed Gyeongbokgung, which, great news, meant we were at least headed in the correct direction, we passed Gwanghwamun Plaza with its giant statues of Sejong and Admiral Yi Sun-sin . I looked longingly out the window at them. I hadn’t realized we were so close! Visions of Faith popped into my mind, and I itched to explore. Naver announced our stop was upon us, and we piled out of the bus, realizing, uhoh, we should have probably recognized that there were more palaces in the area than just the main two and I probably should have been more specific when I looked at it in the map.

Whatevs. It was a palace, and we were there! So we paid the fee and piled in. It was fun to explore with the three of us. Deoksugung palace was actually a later palace, used for ceremonies and visits of state when the actual people lived in a more modern building. It was interesting to see the two together. New meets old. We continued our long-held tradition of going to the bathroom on royal grounds before we heard it, the drums in the distance. Turns out we were at the wrong palace at the right time, the ceremonial changing of the guards. We watched the procession march by us, the bright colors of their regalia, the bouncing feathers of their hats. 

View this post on Instagram

Changing of the guard at the Deoksugung palace. From old to new, now headed to Gangnam. #deoksugung #palace #guard #travel #seoul #southkorea

A post shared by Stephanie (@kchatjjigae) on Mar 16, 2019 at 10:27pm PDT

We headed back towards the front gates, following them along, where they waited for the actual ceremony to begin. It was fun to see these people, not at attention, just hanging out, bored. A reminder they are real people, not fixtures of the past.

Once we had our fill of palaces for the day, it was time to begin the real task, heading over the river to try and hunt ourselves down some idols, it was time to go visit the JYP offices. After a wrong start, or a wrong stop, hopping off a stop too soon, we were ready for it, prepared to see the legendary building where the likes of 2PM, Got7, Stray Kids came from. Though not yet. Turns out, he’s cleverly not anywhere near the subway stop, so we hoofed it there, stopping for more, much-needed caffeine. On the way there we passed the location of the Seoul Olympic Games which we saw the empty buildings from our position on the street. Sure, we didn’t actually go to them, but we saw the buildings, so I get to count that on the list of places I’ve been on this trip. 

Don’t agree? Go ahead, fight me. 

Finally, we were there! 

It’s an office. Dude. Get yourself a gift shop. Something. Other fans were milling about. We’d buy stuff. Mr. and Mrs. McFeeley are huge Stray Kids fans, I would have gotten something for them, and the ladies would have encouraged me, despite my DON’T LET ME BUY ANYTHING MORE. But I’d simply be able to get around that by saying, “I said I wasn’t allowed to buy anything else for RYAN. This would be for Sean. Totally different person”. But, since they didn’t have a gift shop, the point was moot. Across the street was a coffee shop, and you could see, the way people were positioned, a lot of them were just waiting for someone to come in or out so they could take a photo, be it for dispatch or just a fan site. Not wanting to be one of those people, we simply circled the block, and when we passed a snazzily dressed and perfectly coifed man, we crafted stories about who he was and what he did for the company.

Good times. 

Realizing we weren’t going to get to have the idol meet-cute we’d desperately dreamed of, we decided it was time to move on, back across the river. 

Oh! I think it was here, but if not, it’s the perfect time to talk about it. Remember the whole thing that was happening while we were there, with Seungri and his band of ugh? All about secret cams and chats and douchebaggery? Well, it’s no lie to say that this is rampant across the country. Did you hear about the member of staff who put a camera in one of the girl’s rooms on a variety show? Or there was a sting that happened at a hotel where people were recording women? It happens all of the time. While we were on the subway, we were separated, which happened when we wanted to snag an actual seat. This particular time, it was Leila and me on one side and SaraG on the other. Next to her was a man on his phone, who we joked looked just like a police detective from a drama. See? I just had to say that, and you know EXACTLY what he looked like. Turns out? 

Not so police-y. 

We got off the train, laughingly told SaraG our ideas, and she was like, “Ummmmm…yeah, he was watching pervy hidden video footage.” Apparently, there are Instagrams out there dedicated to this shit, and this guy is just, sitting on the subway, casual as can be, watching it. Ew. 

Shaking it off, we decided first on our list was to cross something off Miss Leila’s list, stopping off at the mall by our subway station and picking her up a foundation she’d seen online, but had yet to see it anywhere in Seoul except for this mall. And I was on a mission too! Find the Flying Tiger, a Copenhagen store, take a picture and show it to my friend Thea who is a big fan of their New York store. It was a huge shocker to see that they were in Korea!

We wandered around the food court, looking for something to eat, but it was pricy and not what we were looking for  (we’ve been spoiled eating beautiful and delicious food for under 10000 won.). Despite how tired we were, we decided we wanted to skip the food court, instead planned to hit Hongdae in order to find something better. Added plus? This would get Leila her last night in Hongdae with some buskers. Where did we end up? Korean Pizza! After seeing some Eat Your Kimchi posts on the weirdness that could be Korean Pizza back in the day, I’ve always wanted to try it. There was a Mr. Pizza in LA that every time I went to KCon I’d say, this was the time I was going to go there, but as one of our group was a vegan, it always managed to be pushed to the side. (We felt bad enough dragging her to Korean BBQ.) In Haeundae, our apartment was right above a Pizza School where we would pass by and look at the poster proclaiming all of their weirdo pizza flavors and planned on hitting up that one, but we just never had the chance. Tonight was the night!

I wish I’d taken pictures of the menu to tell you exactly what we had eaten, but I can tell you, one of them had mashed sweet potatoes, and the other one had galbi. Both were actually pretty yummy. We’d chosen this particular restaurant in the din of all the others as  1) was something we could all get behind with all of the other choices, and 2) was an upper floor establishment, overlooking all of the buskers. Dinner and a show!

As we ate, Leila and I investigated one last thing stop on our phones, the Han river. We knew it was close, had crossed it several times via subway, but had yet to go and find it in person. Had yet to find out which pairing of us were going to officially breakup on its shores as Korean dramas tell us is the norm. It was a must on all of our lists, and we couldn’t believe we hadn’t been there yet. It was a little difficult for us to pinpoint the best place to go to as you couldn’t really put Han River into the map, sure we’d find a shore but what else would we find when we got there? We found a park that seemed promising, but, honestly, at that time of day, after all, we’ve done, and now knowing about Leila’s poor toe, we decided to pass. 

But don’t worry Han River fans. There are still two of us who have days left and hours to fill….

With this, we close out another chapter of our trip. Another day passed. Another person packing up to go home. Which leaves SaraG and I. All by ourselves for three days. Will we make it? Will our friendship survive? Or is it going to be the relationship that crashes by the shores of the Han? Stay tuned to find out! 

    KOREAN ADVENTURE DAY ONE: AIR PLANES, TIME TRAVELS, AND MULTIPLE SARAG(S)

Korean Adventure Day Two: Sadly, No Zombies

KOREAN ADVENTURE DAY THREE: THE SOLO JOB

KOREAN ADVENTURE DAY FOUR: BY THE POWER OF STEVE!

KOREAN ADVENTURE DAY FIVE: STAIRS, AND MEERKATS, AND POLICE…OH MY!

KOREAN ADVENTURE DAY SIX: EMERGENCYS, BELLY RUBS, AND TIPSI TEXTS

KOREAN ADVENTURE DAY SEVEN: THAT WEIRD SHAPED ARTY BUILDING IN GANGNAM

KOREAN ADVENTURES DAY EIGHT: KPOP TAKES A VACATION

KOREAN ADVENTURES DAY NINE: WE LOVE A MAN WHO LOVES A MARKET

KOREAN ADVENTURE DAY TEN: STEPHANIE DOESN’T DO NAKED

Korean Adventure Day Eleven: Let’s Get Saeguky Another big day in Kdramaland! We're counting down the last hours of Leila's stay in Korea with a march through the city.

[icecreamtruckz]

tyra banks can’t go an episode of america’s got talent without mentioning her ability to smize and she’s SO valid

#ily queen

[densiland]

A Line in the Sand (9x23) and Ninguna Salida (9x24) - DensiLand: Analysis of all things Deeks & Kensi

A Line in the Sand (9x23) and Ninguna Salida (9x24) – The one(s)... where everything is broken

Like a phoenix rising from the ashes, a DensiLand Analysis returns!  (And thanks as always to ncislosangelesfan.com for all the screencaps!)

Even I can’t believe it’s been 4.5 seasons(!) since I wrote & posted one of these. It’s a testament to 1) how burnout I was from the incredibly long “The Frozen Lake” (5x10) effort and 2) how life can change. 

Before we jump into the episode, I want to express my gratitude to the entire cast, crew, etc. for creating these incredible episodes, episodes that have been sorely missed in regard to their quality, entertainment, storytelling, conflict, action, and so much more. It made me remember everything I loved about this show and characters.

So why these episodes & this post now? This all stems from our incredible @wikideeks team and our reviewer Karen. I was so excited to share my comments on these episodes on her review post. I found I couldn’t stop writing! It grew far beyond what was appropriate for a simply “comment” and I immediately felt that pull to write this post - almost exactly the same feeling that drove me to start this blog in the first place! Just know it’s not as chronological and detailed as my previous posts grew to be, as they had gotten out of control. (Plus, I wanted the most important stuff IMHO at the end!)

Preparing for the episodes - In seeing who was writing & directing these, I was excited! Then I thought, "Oh no, Military! What is he going to do to them this time?!" Like others said, where has THIS pair of episodes been all season?! THIS is the quality you get from people who have "institutional memory", who have been there from the start and can pull from the mountain of backstory. What an epic reminder of what this show has been and still can be. The rest of this I'll break into categories & characters.

HANDICAMS - Like someone else said, it was too erratic this time. Were they different cameras or the operators running? It was too jarring. Callen's pursuit with no music, which I'm sure was a purposeful choice, didn't just feel like NOT their show, but also not a professional network show at all. Weird.

(Simply because this photo should be posted.)

2 HOURS! - It was a glorious NCISLA movie that so many of us have longed for! Definitely worth it. Quality from top to bottom! 

MOSELEY -  Let’s just get this out of the way, as I don't want to spend much time on her. Initially, I expected they were pulling a "Granger" - hate him at first and then grow to love him. Nope. Not even an inkling. This character &/or actress (???) were consistently abhorrent. (It probably even made some of us apologize for the times we were angry with Hetty.) Not only does Moseley (thus Ms. Long) need to go based on all of this character's out of line words and actions, but I also hope it's done in a spectacular way. No slinking out silently to raise her kid. No, this is deserving of a public shaming from the entire team and epic firing by Hetty (in her most bad-ass fashion)! Deeks and the rest of the team deserve to be avenged. (Can you tell I’ve gotten pulled into the Marvel Universe since my last post?)

HIDOKO - As to not be forgotten, even though we didn’t “see” her Hidoko deserves mention. Good actress, interesting character. But it really depends on what TPTB might have in store for her if I’m invested in having her back. She's probably alive, but either way I'm ok. (But if she's dead did it have to be in such a graphic way?!)

ISSUE OF CHARACTER - I loved the continued thread of "character", as like Karen, I immediately had a flashback to Deeks & Sam's conversation over the chess game on the stakeout. Seriously, how do you question Callen's character? (Even Callen wonders this...)

SAM - They kept making such an issue of his continuous bleeding and I don't think it was just due to his slowing down/not keeping up with this case. It feels like there will be something more with this. It's no surprise he wanted to go after the kid, based on his own, and I like how he acknowledged the entire team was in this together. I'm curious why Moseley didn't snap at him the way she did Deeks.

FIRED - Yeh, that happened. (See the Surf Log over at wikiDeeks - tough to keep so short, thus this here!) I think we’ve all been waiting for a season or so for this too happen. Whether it was from Granger losing patience, LAPD pulling another stunt, or who knows what else, this had been foreshadowed for quite awhile However, the reason for this was outrageous, as there was no real basis other than Moseley pitching a hissy fit. (Reign it in Gayle!) Yet, like Deeks I was still utterly shocked. 

For a moment. For some reason knowing Hetty was still there gave me confidence and peace that the decision would be reversed. Eventually. (And yes, a rascal indeed!)

Also, I don’t get why no one else on the team defended Deeks. That was disappointing. This was a very different reaction than when Callen turned in his badge. 

Can we also appreciate this Tyra Banks-like “Smeyes” (pronounced Smize) from Deeks/ECO? Knowing he can testify against her (& with Kensi as a witness) is all we need as faith that he’ll be back. 

BROKEN TEAM/PLANE SCENE - Skipping ahead, (don’t worry I’ll come back to “The Garage”) I actually loved the plane scene, of seeing them all at odds with each other as 1) it's something that rarely happens, especially at the same time and 2) creates the intrigue of how they come back together. 

(Thoughts about Silent Kensi are ahead!)

(Who else shouted & did a fist pump when they saw Deeks emerging from the car? What? Oh that was just me? I bet if you’re reading this you did too!)

Yet, based on what had happened, sadly there was no way this was a happy reunion. If anything, it just ramped up. The tension in that fuselage was combustible! 

Call me a “raging optimist” (like my BFF does about me with my honors students, even though that’s the opposite from my natural default), as it applies here. Even when I see it with my own eyes faith springs eternal when considering Densi. They’ve invested too much for too long for it to be otherwise.

This single utterance, “I’m still your partner. At least one last time.” Ouch! A punch right in the feels! The bittersweetness of this possibly being their last mission together.... NO. Absolutely not. I am not having it! So let’s unpackage this:

His words might initially just sound like carrying out his responsibility (even though he’s technically fired) of being Kensi’s partner, of “having her back”. It’s so much more. I know you Deeks; I’ve got your number! It’s simply be a pained cover for his unwillingness to leave Kensi.

He used the word “partner”. We all know how much that term actually carries, and it’s far beyond their work pairing, even if that was the jab he was taking. The other word holding a lot of weight here is “last”. Is this Deeks drawing a line in the sand (stay with me) specifically to get Kensi to see how serious he is and to force her to consider “their” finality? If so, this is a risky move in knowing how Kensi can’t be forced into anything. 

Speaking of...

THE GARAGE SCENE

DENSI - That scene. Those actors. This is the brilliance that brought me (& probably you!) to them. I know so many people are just longing for the "happily ever after". In the long run yes. Yet if you know anything about me (from this blog), I'm a fan of the long-run, the journey, of overcoming obstacles. I've become accustomed to having the minority viewpoint on this. 

Some comment they thought Densi was already past this topic. While yes, it's been a regular subject, I don't recall (like Deeks) there being any firm conclusion. Perhaps people aligned the engagement with agreement regarding kids and “getting out”, when that's clearly not the case. What they showed us were each of them being at absolute odds/opposite ends of a spectrum with each other. When in order for them to be together is a compromised (not like Kensi referred) negotiated middle ground. A happy medium if you will. I understand having kids does tend to be an absolute; however, the when, where, how, etc. are fluid. 

DEEKS - Dear Lord, when Deeks uttered, "I don't think we should be getting married." - the tormented look on ECO's face CRUSHED me. (BRILLIANT & BRAVO!) Deeks has only recently made firm moves & plans to get out. (Kensi has never been one to make personal choices quickly.) The events earlier in this case and season have seemed to only escalate this. To me, it feels like anxiety & fear are pushing Deeks to get them out "before it's too late". (Although the “knocked up” comment was wrong in so many ways.) 

He’s now become desperate & pleeding. ECO gives us a Deeks who is coming undone, even beyond his post-torture recovery - & it’s beautifully vulnerable. 

This may feel smothering to Kensi who isn't YET there. (He's always been ahead of her with their 'ship.) As always he was willing to work through it before he’s pulled away. Still, he gives us hope: HE GETS TO THE PLANE. He gets to her. 

KENSI - Yes, I left her for last, because again if you know anything about me, Kensi's my girl, a character I can relate to in too many ways. So here's my defense of Kensi. 

First, it's too easy to project onto her in the garage as she says very little in the middle of the discussion. Silence it tough to interpret accurately without infusing your own beliefs. Second, that silent characteristic is pure Kensi. She withdrew, just as she has so many times before. Here, huge kudos to DR, as she isn’t able to rely on words, but instead must carefully express non-verbally to convey Kensi’s thoughts & feelings. 

Some might be angry that Kensi hasn't "evolved" past this, but in unexpected situations we naturally gravitate back to what we know, what is customary to us. Kensi simply reverted to her natural default. She was struggling to handle everything Deeks was putting on her in that moment and I believe was working to try to get a grasp on the warring thoughts racing through her mind. 

Third, someone else commented that maybe she has for some reason learned she can't have kids. Intriguing, but a stretch in my mind. As if this was true I'd suspect she'd feel driven to tell Deeks. Why? Out of fear he would leave her and she had to know, had to get it over with. I prefer to read this as fear that maybe she won't get pregnant; that this would make her feel like a failure to herself and Deeks. She (&/or he) would feel so ashamed then THAT will make them fall apart. She's trying to get in front of a potential future situation that might not even be reality - at least as far as we factually know at this point.

She's silently screaming, as her very worst fear is coming true: She believes he's leaving her. While Deeks' initial words might lead to that thought, that's not really what he's saying. (And he says that!) He needs (they both do) to work through this topic before they get married. 

Kensi's turning to go back to the job, yelling at him about her job, of who she is, is "just" her reverting back to what is known, solid, and safe - her job. Her job that won't change. Her job that won't betray her. The one thing that's always been there for her to escape to. Something that makes her feel proud, satisfied, and fulfilled. A job that very rarely puts personal, feeling demands on her.

Finally, let's not forget in the field she screams at him, "We stay together." While it might have been in the heat of the mission, those words extend far beyond their professional partnership - just as Deeks’ final lines in the plane. This is the fight in Kensi, the grit of doing whatever is necessary, even if it's painful to get to resolution. (Think of how much time & effort she put into tracking down her father's killer.) And just as Deeks got to her in the plane, she didn’t get on the chopper; she stayed with Deeks.

Yes, she’s angry. But is she really angry at Deeks? Maybe on the surface. But it’s just as likely she’s frustrated with herself of not being able to find a way to get out/to see beyond this job, of not having worked this out solidly with Deeks before this point, of having walked away from him earlier. We know an angry, fighting Kensi isn’t going to let anything get in her way; the struggle is perhaps her biggest obstacle is herself. Yet she’s able to break out, even if it’s verbal lashing demanding that she & Deeks stay together on the ground. This shows us she's not willing to really walk away or lose Deeks. 

For all the times their ‘ship has “appeared” more one-sided, of Deeks being the one chasing after Kensi, here we get the opposite. (We’ve seen it before, but more quietly & casually, like when she was trying to see him after the torture, when he was in jail, even when he’d been shot & in the hospital.) Her single line is all the hope I needed. (Hope from Kensi Blye, who woulda thunk?!)

ONE LINGERING ASPECT - There's one thing I am struggling to come to terms with. Kensi has seen Deeks having been tortured, of temporarily walking away from the job once. We know he somewhat came back to NCIS because of her, but did she think it would be that simple? That all of these near-misses would have no impact on him? (Remember Nate said the trauma is physically & psychologically cumulative.) That he's made of the same steel that she is? That he would simply bounce back (again)? She lives like she's bulletproof even though she's already been proved otherwise (coma). If it could happen to her, wouldn't the same hold true for Deeks? Does this not also scare her? 

Seems strange, especially for a daughter who lost her own father at a pretty early age. How has she not considered that for her own future and that of a potential child/children? As someone who experienced this loss myself, I personally would work to avoid that at all costs. 

CLIFFHANGER - I actually like this, not knowing what's going to happen. Of course that's maybe because this show has trained me to expect a positive outcome (eventually). There are so many potential permutations and combinations of outcomes to consider and keep us invested over the summer - something that's been sorely lacking the past couple of years. So I say, "BRAVO!" 

Finally, as fate would have it, today my daily lunchtime Dove Dark Chocolate wrapper contained, "Keep them guessing." As Deeks would reply, "Done."

-------------------------------- P.S. As for all the swirling rumors of ECO leaving fully or partially, until he says, who truly knows. While I personally subscribe to an “all in or all out” mentality, the man has to live his life. Yes, he has a family to support (which is easier with a full-time gig), but it also has to be a life well-lived. We all have dreams and aspirations, work to avoid stress and boredom - celebrities included. For him to go into a recurring role, would be disappointing and lessen both the show and Densi. I would never be happy for us to lose Deeks. (The only support I’ll put here is for DR & Kensi; she was here before Deeks and is a complex and compelling independent character in her own right. She doesn’t need Deeks or any other man to be a significant individual character.) ECO & Deeks leaving completely would be devastating, something I personally refuse to consider.

#NCIS Los Angeles #ncis la #NCIS: Los Angeles #NCIS: LA #NCIS:LA #densiland #densi #deeks #Marty Deeks #kensi blye #deeks x kensi #Eric Christian Olsen #Daniela Ruah

[thedumbdump]

Tyra Banks is partucularly known for her smize, but if she says BTS is better than doing that well, GODDAMN THEIR VALUE JUST GOT HIGHER.

#bts #bbmas 2018 #tyra #bangtan

[antmfunny]

1. Mirror Mirror on the Wall - Who’s the Selfiest Queen of All?

Tyra Banks bursts into the Top Model pad to rant about how shitty selfies are these days. She should know - she cruises Instagram endlessly.

She’s here to show the models how to take better mirror shots because sometimes you break up with your photographer boyfriend and have to learn to do the job yourself! (That is only partially a masturbation reference.)

Never mind that the judges constantly insist they’re not looking for an Instagram model, it’s the most practical outcome for most of these contestants, so you might as well set them up for a modicum of success.

Before the lesson commences, we get a pretty much irrelevant clip of Jeana talking about how much she loves Tyra while photos of Tyra scroll on the screen. It’s like, “Hey, guys, you remember Tyra, right?” YES. We have never forgotten Tyra or what she looks like but thanks for the glamor shots.

I don’t have an Instagram account because so many social media platforms come and go that I refused to join new ones past a certain point. By now, it’s clear Instagram is here to stay, so my current excuse is just stubbornness (I swear I’m not as old as Erin.) I’m not sure I’ve ever taken a proper mirror selfie before, and I want to be clear that I know that’s an obnoxious thing to say, that being THAT counter-culture is as obnoxious as someone who is constantly taking selfies.

All of that is to say, even though I don’t know the first thing about selfie excellence, Tyra’s tips all seem to make sense and be useful, and that’s NOT something I can about most other Tyra lessons, like that one about animal necks.

TYRA TIP No. 1: #SLAY

SLAY stands for So Look At Yourself. Evidently, a lot of amateurs look at the camera rather than making smize contact in the mirror, so Tyra encourages selfie-takers to find the shot on the phone, then look toward themselves.

TYRA TIP No. 2: #CIAO

CIAO stands for Crop It All Out. In a lot of mirror selfies, the most prominent part is the camera in the reflection. So Tyra encourages photo-takers to take the shot, then zoom in and crop the camera out.

It’s simple advice, but perhaps too difficult of an acronym since the models have no idea how to spell Ciao. Man, we’ve regressed a lot from the cycles where the winner gets a spread in Italian Vogue.

TYRA TIP No. 3: #DipItLow

Another way to avoid making the camera the focus of the shot is to place it so centrally. Tyra encourages the girls to hold the camera below the waist and tilt it upwards so people first look at the outfit they’re showing off, not the camera.

I don’t know why we don’t get a acronym here like the other two, that just seems lazy. What’s wrong with #DIL? Or if that’s too pickle-y, maybe #HILL (Hold It Low, Ladies) or #DTF (Dip That Fone).

Okay, now it’s time to put these tips into action, and Tyra has enlisted the help of Jourdan Dunn, a “super”model who didn’t think she wanted to be a model until she started watching ANTM as a teenager and decided, fuck it, this looks easy enough. Tyra gets excited as if Jourdan is some Top Model success story, but it’s not like she auditioned to be on the show - she instead chose the path of having a real career.

Jourdan seems like a fine guest and all, but if Tyra really wanted to bring on someone known for his mirror selfies, she should have looked no further than Cycle 22’s Dustin McNeer. As anyone who’s made the mistake of scrolling through the ANTM tag on Tumblr already knows, he takes mirror selfies on the daily and most definitely makes sure the focus of the photo is on something other than his cellphone. (Penis. I’m referring to his penis.)

For the challenge, the models will dress in Jourdan’s designer house sweats and take shots. The winner of the challenge will get her selfie shot on Jourdan’s Instagram page, which has 2 million followers.

Rio seems stoked, explaining that being featured on Jourdan’s account could get her “millions of followers.” To get millions of new followers, that’d mean that EVERY one of Jourdan’s followers would have to decide to follow Rio based on a single post. Especially after Rio’s snide comment about she doesn’t follow back most of her followers because they’re not interesting, I’d say there’s a FAT CHANCE of that. And unlike Rio, I don’t mean that in a fat-shamey way.

Speaking of fat, Khrystyana says that she got her follower count up by showing off her fat rolls. God, I love her.  

Meanwhile, Sandra got her follower count up by being beautiful and popular and all those other things Rio hates. She does well and probably should have won this challenge, except that the show was finally fixing to cut her, so they couldn’t let her win.

Erin’s getting full grandma edit this segment as she yet again moans that she doesn’t know anything about social media. After seeing Khrystyana and Sandra’s follower count, Erin’s is hilarious:

Hey, at least it exceeds her age… by one. I’m not sure why Erin finds taking a picture of herself to be so difficult, but she needs Khrystyana to come and literally guide her through the process. I love how they choose this shot of her to showcase with Khrystyana’s hand on Erin’s:

Can you really call that a selfie? That’s more like an assisted selfie, which is probably popular in the assisted living facility in which Erin resides. Tyra concludes that Erin needed a Selfie 1.0 lesson instead of the Selfie 2.0 lesson she offered the models. It’s true, Tyra is teaching selfies at a Harvard level. She is a professor of self-promotion (I’m not kidding) after all.

Fortunately for Erin, she does great at the real photoshoot, so Tyra gives her a pass. She still only receives her photo middle of the pack call-out-wise, though, which is not a good sign for her longevity if the judges correctly call it her best photo yet.  

Tyra also nails Kyla for ignoring her selfie rules, but hey, what do you expect from someone so stupid? Kyla doesn’t DipItLow, she doesn’t make it croppable… It’s one thing to tune out Drew Elliott, but THEE TYRA BANKS? She’s shitting out more gold than Shanice did after accidentally swallowing a bunch of paint at the shoot. It’s not a good look for Kyla since we know Tyra loves a girl who listens.

All right, time for the winner: it’s Jeana, because who needs hair when you’re wearing a hat and a hood simultaneously?! As a bonus prize, Jeana gets to keep the outfit she’s wearing, which is kind of like when you’re at a bar doing a brand promotion and they say, “You can keep the glass!” and you think, “But I don’t even want the glass.”

Okay, CIAO, everybody! And by that, I mean goodbye.

4 Funniest Moments of America’s Next Top Model Cycle 24 Ep. 8

#ANTM #america's next top model #Top Model #Cycle 24 #Tyra Banks #Tyra #Khrystyana Kazakova #Khrystyana #Jeana Turner #Jeana #Erin Green #Erin #Sandra Shebab #Sandra #Rio #Rio Summers #Jourdan Dunn #mirror selfies #selfie #Dustin McNeer #Erik Asla #Instagram

[ziva-david]

2. What is your favorite snippet of dialogue?4. Do you prefer writing long or short fics?

Hi, friendo!! Thank you for always sending me asks, you are a “real one.” (Also I feel like we should totally message each other unless you’re not comfortable with that i totally respect that) 

2. Do I have a favorite piece of dialogue??? Recently with all of my writing, I feel like its so awkward and forced, so this is kind of a tough one. 

snippet #1 - this is not an actual written piece just an idea in my head. previously I said I wanted to do a tiva fic based off of brooklyn nine-nine, but I never really developed it from that. One of the biggest issues I had was how could I make Israeli born Ziva David become a detective for the NYPD??? And then I decided to make her American born with a dual citizen to Israel. However, I feel like having her grow up in America I feel like she would not be as devoted to Israel as she is on the show. (In this fic her father would be just as devoted to Israel as he is in canon.) So during their date, after Ziva loses to Tony I want them to get into some family issues like how Ziva’s father no longer talks to her after she did not enlist in the IDF. Which personally I can not write in this fic especially. after. the. idf. just. murdered. a. palestinian. paramedic. (which is a war crime under the geneva convention)

snippet #2 - this is a terrible and i need to stop watching rom-coms 

“So was this just supposed to be a fuck to get over him.” Nick asked semi-startling Ellie at the sudden lack of silence.  

“I guess so, I don’t know, truthfully.” She replied and absentmindedly ran a hand through her hair.

“Well I mean c’mon you willingly wore that underwear without the intention of hooking up with someone.” He egged on clearly interested in her train of thought.

“They were for him. Yesterday was the first time that I had seen him in two weeks. He was away on business.” Ellie divulged, not really sure as to why she did so.

“Well, it was a nice gift I appreciated it, a lot. even though it was his ‘we haven’t screwed in two weeks’ present.” He smirked, turning back to his newspaper. So much for being chivalrous, she thought.

The more time she spent with him, the greater desire she felt to kiss smack the smile off of his face.

“More like a month.” She muttered, looking down at her three quarter full cup of coffee. Nick dropped his paper and looked straight up at her.

“I’m sorry, what?”

“It’s been more like a month, like before thanksgiving.” She told him as he stared at her blankly, “It wasn’t intentional, my mother loves Jake, but she’s still a firm in her rule that no one is allowed to stay under her roof if they are not married, and - and I was expected to stay on the farm when I visited. Then we got home and both our jobs kept us busy, and then he was gone for business.” She finished, and he still silently stared at her, “stop looking at me like that!” She huffed. His smirk was annoying enough, but now it was replaced by a glint in his eyes. He actually smiled with his eyes (Smizing as America’s Next Top Model host Tyra Banks would call it - and he did it better than most contestants on the show).

“I’m sorry it’s just, it all makes sense now.”

“What makes sense?”

“Why you were so, you know?” His reply caused her to roll her eyes.

“What horny? Yeah sorry it had nothing to do with you just the circumstances.” She smiled back, wanting to shrink his annoying ego.

“Sure.” He smirked again, he was such an ass and his behaviour reminded her of the guys she was attracted to in high school. It drove her crazy.

4. I really love the idea of writing long fics, like to me the more words the better. However, I am the worlds slowest writer so it isn’t really practical for me to do so… 

#me giving you guys snippets is really the only way you guys can read my work #also I hope I didn’t already give you guys this one I honestly can’t remember. if I didn’t me know and I’ll post another one #asks #loudlooks

[dentalrosie]

SKILL DEVELOPMENT FOR DENTAL NURSES: A SERIES

By Rosie Connell

LESSON 2:

‘THE GIFT OF THE GAB’

The worst feedback I ever got from a dentist in my first year, was ‘Rosie, you don’t talk enough’

The best feedback I ever received from a dentist, was 3 years later; ‘Rosie, you have the best patient communication skills I’ve come across, you can really talk about anything!’

This example is a testament to self reflection, continuing professional development and good practice.

So, there was a gap in my skill set, and this just would not do! I considered why this was true of myself, and I put it down to a lack of confidence, an introverted personality and inexperience. To be honest, I remember thinking, ‘oh I didn’t even realise I needed to talk that much?!’ I was focused on cross infection, notes, stocking up etc etc. I didn’t realise I was Neglecting one of my main responsibilities: patient focus and care. I thought I was doing okay, I mean, the patient was alive..but that dentist wanted more than just a living patient (honestly! so demanding)..she wanted a calm, m welcomed, and entertained patient whilst she reviewed notes and xrays, or waited for LA to take effect. So according to this prescription, I just started talking..about anything. But be warned, it takes practice and not all patients are gifted in holding a conversation, so sometimes you have to do most of the work.

There’s no secret course you can take to get better at filling these awkward silences with strangers, you just have to put it into practice. It may take some time but if you persevere..you’ll be so good at talking, people will wish you would just stop!

Most dentists like you to speak with patients to help ease any anxiety and allow them to focus on diagnosis and treatment. I have found that it builds a rapport, not just fills a silence; you get to learn about the patients, they get to learn about you and they have a more pleasant experience overall. I’ve had some great feedback after developing in this area from patients and dentists. It has made my working day so much more enjoyable, I have more genuine reasons to smile and laugh and it allows me to directly contribute more to that patient’s experience.

Here are my chatting tips to get you started or improve your already great chat game:

1. Be confident – you don’t need to be loud or over the top, but a quiet confidence will instantly make this possible stranger want to engage.

A great little tip for appearing confident is to let your hands and body move freely. When you use gestures and body movements as you speak, you come across a lot more confident than if you were to be super still. Also, research has shown having your hands visible, makes you instantly more trustworthy, which is a big factor for our patients, especially if they have never seen you before.

Here’s a link to a great YouTube video I learnt this from: https://youtu.be/PMmnPpjtU7c (You might notice that the speaker does not stop moving her hands, she’s a wizard!!)

2. Smile - don’t be scary though, only use a genuine smile when you would naturally. And you can always use your eyes to ‘smize’ like Tyra Banks says!

3. Make eye contact – as in any social interaction, avoiding eye contact is a sign of distrust. Make natural, friendly eye contact when talking and remember to blink!

4. Let your personality shine – develop your own style whilst remaining professional. If the conversation leads to, and you are happy, you can share your interests and personal stories with the patient. It helps you become more human and relatable in their eyes.

5. Have a work persona – I’m not at all shy but I do gain more energy alone. So at work, I tend to play a bit more of a chatty character. At home, and with friends, I’m a lot quieter. Developing a work persona, sets your intentions for the day, so you can remain consistent with patients and colleagues alike. Then I go home..and recharge with more silent escapades like reading.

6. Stay away from taboo topics-politics, religion, brexit, football (I just don’t like that one) avoid any subjects that can get you caught into giving personal opinions. Keep the conversation light and fun.

7. Be tactful and genuine- like in any good conversation, don’t just talk willy nilly. React to what the patient says and go with their flow. If a patient tells you he lost his wife, take time to react genuinely, gauge how many follow up questions they feel comfortable with answering and then try and give them a positive outlook and then take their mind off it. (never skate over something this personal, it may take practice to feel comfortable in this situation, but it will come, if the patient is sharing with you, let them and offer sincere replies)

8. Examples of conversation Starting phrases:

(Some weather alternatives)

‘Busy day today?’ – I call this the taxi driver special but it just opens up the conversation so I know to ask about work or not. (Not everybody works due to individual circumstances, and sometimes making wrong assumptions can lead to an awkward exchange) I learnt this the hard way when I asked an 16 year old soldier if he was going to see his family at Christmas, but he had joined the army from a children’s home. I learnt to ask open questions instead like ‘what are you doing for Christmas?’

Or ‘What are you doing for the rest of the day?’

If a patient is wearing a company sweatshirt or piece of clothing, you could ask them where they work.

(I do these kind of things so often because all the pleasant and memorable medical appointments I’ve had, the doctor or nurse has asked me something not related to the appointment and it instantly put me at ease. It seemed they genuinely were interested and for one little moment you can forget why you are there. I believe that’s what sets turns a routine appointment into a great experience)

9. Examples of Reaction phrases:

(sometimes a patient can bring up a topic that you might not know much about or have much interest in. So the following are some phrases to keep the conversation ticking along, getting the patient to do most of the work)

‘That must be interesting!’ – this skips out of having to think of a direct questions but let’s the patient continue.

‘Id love to be able to do something like that’ – you can’t be interested in everything, but you can sure fake it for the team

‘Wow, I didn’t know that’ – let the patient become the expert, most likely they will want to show their knowledge, mission complete!

Plus all the positive little nuggets you can offer to bolster a patient:

‘That’s great’ , ‘you must be really good then’ , ‘how impressive!’

10. Tips for children:

You wouldn’t always ask your 6 year old patient how the weather is, so you could instead, start a conversation about what they are wearing or about their toys, or teddies that they bring for comfort. (Limit this to 1 comment about their appearance, such as their hairstyle or a character on their tshirt - you dont want the parent to think you are excessively oggling their child!)

Example:

1. A child with a teddy – you could say ‘wow who’s this? Are they getting their teeth checked too?’ (directed at the teddy) I usually ask to take the teddy ( if the child allows me) and pretend it’s whispering something to me. To a child, this is pure magic, never underestimate these kind of seemingly, simple gestures.

2. ‘Oh I like your T-shirt, do you like unicorns?!’ (I remember one patient just said ‘no’) this usually works better with sports jerseys or on small children! Unicorns are so last year!!

3. If a child will not talk with me, I usually say ‘oh you arent talking to me today? Now I am going to be upset’ by the end of the appointment, I can usually get one word or if I even get a smile, I’ll finish it off with ‘are you my friend now?’ Mostly it’s a yes!

So there you go! My tips and tricks for making conversation with patients. I hope you find something useful here. Next time, I’m going to be talking about dealing with difficult patients as a dental Nurse.

Ciao for now!

Rosie x

For enquiries: [email protected]

[hbgoodie]

Not sure if this little Peruvian girl ever watched Tyra Banks but she's definitely got the smize down 👀 look at those eyes! I was blown away by the beauty of this country 💕@charityvision #LifeIsGoodie (at Peru)

#lifeisgoodie

[soccermomsteve]

Smize Like Tyra (Clint Barton x Reader)

Plot: Clint gets bored and does the Reader's makeup

A/N: Obviously no wifey here and in case you’re wondering, this is kinda the look I was thinking and what all this will be based off of and referred to

“Babe, I’m bored, entertain me.” Clint whined.

“I’m trying to get ready, go play in the vents.” You replied from your spot on the floor in front of the mirror.

“Ready for what?” Clint asked.

“It’s girls night, I have to look hot.” You giggled.

“You always look hot.” Clint winked.

“Here, just watch YouTube.” You waved off, handing Clint your phone like a mother would her toddler.

“Oooooh, makeup.” Clint whispered.

You continued doing your hair, spraying hair spray every now and then, listening to Clint gasp and mumble “How does she do it?”

“I figured out the key to curing my boredom, let me do your makeup.” Clint offered.

“I have to leave in an hour so no. I know you’re going to mess around and I don’t have time for that.” You said.

“I promise I won’t, please. Pretty please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please. I will make you breakfast in bed for a week and get you out of training with Steve one time.” Clint begged.

“You drive a hard bargain... fine.” You agreed.

“Ok, so Nikkie says you need to moisturize first, have you done that? And can you lay all your stuff out for me?” Clint asked.

“Moisturized after my shower, yes. I’ll get my bag and get everything ready for you.” You smiled.

Clint watched you lay out your makeup, mentally keeping note of the things he would need later.

“So first primer... here it is.” Clint mumbled to himself, picking up your primer and rubbing the primer onto your face and onto your neck.

“Even the neck, wow!” You laughed, feeling his fingers tickle under your chin.

“Then the foundation and your beauty egg blender.” Clint continued.

You cringed as you watched him pour a large amount of foundation onto the sponge, but he carried on as if nothing was wrong. He began to dot the foundation onto your skin, first in the middle, then work his way out. He quickly realized that he had too much foundation and dotted some under your chin and down your neck before getting dome toilet paper for the excess.

“Blending time, tell me if I do this too hard.” Clint advised.

He began to pat the foundation into your skin, pulling your hair back as he did your forehead, and moving your head from side to side, up and down to see if everything was blended well enough.

Then he did concealer, having fun with the designs he put under your eyes, on your forehead, on your chin, and on your nose.

“I know you drew a penis, you better blend really well mister.” You glared.

He blended extra long that time, the moved on to powder your face, and even bake under your eyes with extra powder. 

“She didn’t tell me show to do eyebrows, what do I do?” Clint panicked.

“I got it.” You reassured, taking the brow pencil and quickly filling them in.

“Now eye shadow, things will go well, I’ll do a good job.” He mumbled to himself.

He pulled your face extra close and got to work on the eyes. He was amazed to find that there was a primer especially for your eyes, and found that he really liked fluffy brushes.

“How do I dampen the brush, I’m almost done and all that’s left is like 2 things, this won’t mess me up.” Clint rambled. 

You took the brush he was going to use and sprayed it with your setting spray on both sides before giving it back to Clint. He focused on getting the gold shadow right where it needed to be, getting so close that you could feel the heat radiating off his body.

“You cannot move, it’s wing time. Do not move.” Clint ordered.

You stayed very still as he drew the flick first and then dragged it across your eye very carefully.

“Wow, perfect, absolutely perfect. I’m becoming a beauty guru and you will be my model.” Clint cheered.

“Let me see,” You said, attempting to get up, then getting pushed back to your sitting position.

“No, my masterpiece is not done.” Clint replied.

He quickly finished you eyes, grazing your eyeball with the eyeliner only once, before he struggled with false eyelashes for 10 minutes.

He groaned every time he attempted to put them on, but one was always at a different position than the other or would clearly be making you uncomfortable, but lil ol’ Clint persevered. When he finally did get the lashes on perfectly he clapped for a while, the quickly instructed that you make a fish face for contouring.

He applied a little bit at a time, not wanting the contour to be too dark, then bronzed up your forehead and your neck. Then he instructed that you give a fake smile for blush and then smize like Tyra Banks for highlight on the tops of your cheekbones. 

“Almost done. Just lips left.” Clint told you after having sprayed an excess of setting spray all over your face.

He carefully lined your lips, making sure to not got outside the natural shape of your lips and then again, carefully filled in your lips with the lipstick he had chosen- the one that most matched the lipstick used in the tutorial.

“I am done!” Clint smiled, kissing you quickly and pulling you to your feet to the front of the mirror.

“Wow. This is amazing. You actually did a good job.” You smiled, admiring Clint’s work in the mirror.

“I know! Look at that highlight too.” Clint chuckled.

“I need to take selfies- wait, I need some real clothes on first.” You said as you rushed to change into your outfit for the night.

“(Y/N), your makeup looks amazing. We’ve been drinking and dancing for hours, nothing has moved.” Sharon yelled over the music.

“Thank you! Clint did it actually.” You replied.

“No way, he’s amazing!” Wanda ogled.

“Oh that will definitely boost his ego.” Natasha laughed.

#clint barton imagine #clint barton x reader #hawkeye imagine #hawkeye x reader #avengers imagines #marvel imagine

[queenlupitajones]

Becoming Lynette

“Models! Models! Models!” 

Shouts the floor manager in precise conviction as he ran around the corners of the fancy room where long-legged fashion entities dressed themselves in their most daring and unapologetic Twinkie tops and lace garments that draped their sun-kissed perfected nature. The boudoirs were lighted in incandescent luminosities reflecting beauty in gesticulation. Shades of luminous pink and high profile beige painted to hide freckles and the dark circles of the cruel world. Permed and ironed hot blondes and auburns and the plain dark waves arrayed in diversity as the music bombarded the runway with its beat and melancholic grace. Euphoric and agitated, fashion monsters sat still and spotted on the next big thing in the fashion world.

“Models, ready! In 3, 2, 1!..”

I walked towards the light, smiling with delicate consistency and vigor. My insipid legs swathed with sweat and the sparkling gems they pasted on me. I saw no one but myself in that moment. It was my moment. It was Jamaica Santorini’s magical moment.

Then I reminisced, in every pace of my Jimmy Choo stiletto, comes the flashback of a distant memoir. The echoing cheers were the roars of poverty that struck me pale and hungry for some dreadful nights, my girlfriends turned their backs and looked at me in the eye, their biting grin and scary scowls reminded me of the people who once challenged me and my dreams, stepped on me at times, and discouraged me a thousand fold.

“My catwalk was a killer, I did the Naomi Campbell twist with the Tyra Banks ‘smize’,” as my assertive mind exclaimed.

Another step to the aisle of fame and luxury, when I heard a gentle tick coming from the bottom of my tip-toed 6 inch heel. I tripped, and saw myself already on my knees, helpless, and nobody cared. Like a waterfall, my tears dropped to the floor and all the blinding lights went out, the crowd disappeared and I’m back to my dainty, old, pitiful self. The Jamaica from the hood, who counts stars and creates her own constellation out from the oblivious dots of her ambitious soul.

There I was, staring blank to the ceiling of my small space, enduring the redundant buzz of my dilapidated fan, blowing the sticky notes posted in my “Bucketlist Wall.” I stood and started picking the notes I have written religiously for the past 4 years. One by one, I contemplated the inspiration behind each note; “I will go and study in a prestigious university in the city.” I smiled, and realized I was already in it, studying in Crimson University was a privilege that won’t measure to any material bribe. That was my dream. I studied as an academic scholar grantee, after I graduated valedictorian in high school. I need to get a scholarship since my parents won’t be able to send me to college, I still have seven other siblings who will depend on the success of this journey. Yes. I am the family’s breed winner--a typical plot in our village.

It all started when mom passed away when I was five. I was playing with my friends in the neighborhood when I found out she had already gasp for her final breath. I knew my mom has an ailment, she was already bed-ridden for the past 6 months, I knew how much she wanted to stay and live long, because my mom was a fighter. She would always defend us when the bad guys come around, and she’s talented too, she sings her favorite song “Paper Roses” until we fall asleep, she’s the woman I adored so much, who won’t like to see us weak and weeping. She aspires her children to become strong and sensible men and women in the society. But I guess, she won’t be able to see us achieve our dreams for her.

Tears rolled from my eyes, the moment I started imagining her face. I snapped and scolded myself for being a melodramatic. “Positivity.” I uttered, and exhaled with enthusiasm. Another note, this time the purple one flew and landed on my side table; “Make my dad proud,” it read. “Oh, my dad,” I sighed.

Dad remarried 2 years after mom died. Instantly, my stepmother bore our youngest sibling. I knew how much dad would have wanted a complete and happy family. I would want that too. But, soon after he got married to that mischievous woman, his eyes withered and forgot all the emotions his children deserve. He’s always upset and frustrated. Like any man, he never spoke to us with such endearment, no “I love you’s,” just silence. No birthday parties, but early sleep roll calls. My dad has always been like that, strict, hushed, insensitive, and passive.

It was during my high school graduation that I felt all the world’s boulders wedged on my shoulder. He didn’t show up. In fact, I dedicated my speech to him, thinking that he’d be happier if he will hear all the beautiful words of gratitude that I toiled with the night before. I was such a cry baby, a weak spirited lass. But I never hated my father after what he did. I have to understand everything has changed. I am no longer his princess because he found her evil queen.

I came to my senses when I heard my phone rang. It was my best friend Lynette.

From the other line she said, “can you come to my apartment? It’s kind of boring here, I need someone to talk, and guess what? I bought you’re favorite Dunkin Donut, Bavarian Supreme!”

“I knew you’re gonna call. I’ll be there in a bit, I’m gonna claim my Bavarian Supremo! And one thing, I’ll sleep over, okay?”

“That would be great! See you because I missed you,” then she hanged up.

I immediately packed my things, my two-day-not-yet-ironed school uniform, my three year old black flats, my thesaurus, toothbrush, and a pair of fresh clothes. I walked from my dormitory to her apartment not minding the danger that could commence in this wild city street. There were prostitutes flaunting their flesh to the blind drunkards across the road, I couldn’t dare to watch the lewdness of the scene, nor the cat-calling and the obnoxious whispers of bigotry. I walked as fast as I could, and saw bunch of beggars asking for alms, children fighting over a piece of Chicken Joy. It was a dead end for them, and I felt scared thinking if such would happen to me.

Finally, I am at the front gate of my best friend’s apartment and saw Lynette coming out of the door. She was wearing a loose flannel shirt and a panda-printed pajama, she always looks beautiful whatever she wears and was always the cheerful one, affluent, since her mom is an actress, and her dad is a lawyer. She’s intelligent too, and very good in literature. That is no question since she’s this year’s University Queen Ambassadress. She’s got the wit and the beauty in every little bit of her bone. And the ironic thing is that she has a friend completely opposite to her in every detail. That’s why in our Grammar class, when the professor asked me to give an example of an antonym, my hypothalamus would always say “Lynette is the antonym for Jamaica.”

Lynette hugged me, and whispered, “I missed you.”

“I missed you too Lyn,” I responded.

We went inside her room and started exchanging conversations. She would always ask me about school and how I dealt with the environment. Everything seems fine to me, especially when I met Justine. Lynette always loves to listen to my stories about Justine.

“Tell me about Justine today? Did you meet?” she asked.

“Yeah, we were on… I mean, on the same class. And finally I got the chance to talk to him, I know it sounds crazy, but our conversation lasted only for 2 minutes.”

I was not surprised when she gave me the loudest “O.M.G.” in the world. Then, it’s like her tongue was in total panic, asking me questions from one after another.

“You go girl! That 2 minute talk is a killer! I mean, it’s already legit. So, what did he tell you? Did he tell you you’re beautiful? Did he asked you for dinner? Or a date? A study out? Or did he share something intimate to you?”

“What are you asking me? Of course he won’t tell me that I’m beautiful because in the first place I’m not. Worse, no one takes an ugly duckling for dinner or a date. Study out? That’s too impossible for a guy like him, he’d rather play online games the whole night than be with me. Something intimate? Never! Can’t you see? I’m a hopeless case. I’m plain and unattractive to any guy. Lynette, I’m not like you. We’re way too different, and Justine is too handsome for me, just imagine those deep, brown, Turkish eyes, those sexy eyebrows, his red lips, not to mention the competition I’ll be getting from the Queen B’s, especially Rebecca.”

Lynette rolled her eyes and said, “So you are afraid with that Rebecca slash Queen of Goats? Did you see her new hair color and that afro-perm she did with her hair? She looked like a lamb, an old, cranky lamb. I don’t even get the idea why she became cheerleader, when she’s not even cheerful, she’s always mean and rude and selfish. The world is such an ironic place sometimes.”

Then, she stood and took my hand, “come here you drama queen, who says you’re not beautiful? You know what? You are. Come here, I’ll show you something.”

She let me face her vanity mirror and instructed me to close my eyes.

“I want you to close your eyes and imagine all of the beautiful things that happened to you. Take a journey back to your memory lane and gather all your happy thoughts.”

She continued.

“What can you see? Now, I want you to hug yourself and as you open your eyes, gently utter the words, I am beautiful.”

I did what she said. Then she looked at me still holding her hands with mine.

“What you just said is true. Yes, you are beautiful, not because you are attractive but because you have this brave heart that could break any wall that fate would build. As long as you believe in the beauty of your dreams and have the undying will to achieve them, then you are no different from the women you see in the magazines.”

I was inspired by her words that I instantly hugged her.

“Did you really mean that? How I wish Justine will see that. Anyway, thank you. Can I eat my doughnut now?”

She just smiled and nodded.

I was in an impeccable solitude, it was a perfect moment. The moon is beaming and deflecting its interminable vivacity. Fireflies are dancing with the sycamore leaves swaying back and forth as the evening zephyr blew their acquitted amalgamation. I saw Justine in a corner, on his left hand is a red box, and on the other is a bouquet of dandelions and garden-fresh hyacinth. I was delighted to see him, he came closer, and closer until his deep Turkish eyes met my innocent dark round irises. I could feel his scent touching my cheeks which made my heart skip a beat. As Justine was about to make his way and enter my guiltless lips, I heard a reverberating sound of harsh foot steps coming from somewhere. I scrutinized the blurry panorama and apprehended that it was Rebecca wearing her interstellar gear.

“What are you doing? You grotesque and boring woman?” she shouted in fury.

Slowly, her friendly chortle, turned to a sour and loud laugh. She transformed into an eight legged monster and devoured Justine whole. I screamed witnessing the hostility.

My resounding scream went weak and what I heard next was the loud buzzer coming from the university corridor. That’s where I realized I was having a nightmare in broad daylight. Some of my classmates noticed how my body awkwardly reacted. Then I saw Lynette who was seated next to me, then she whispered, “Are you okay?” I only responded with a gentle nod.

I saw Rebecca and her girlfriends giggling, with their eyes jammed towards my direction. I didn’t pay attention to what they’re doing or even to what they’re saying because I know it’s not worth it.

There goes the last subject of the day. It’s going to be a long weekend since there will be no class on Monday. I am now receiving calls and text messages from my clients, one of them asked me to go to their house and do laundry, another client asked me to write a poem for her son’s school assignment. The most common task they usually ask me to do is to write reflection papers, and since I am a writer, writing about the same theme for 12 people is quite a tedious job. I did make a petty kind of living out from such minimalistic resources. It is my only way to survive in this money-matters-most urban state most especially now that my dad has less financial support for my school allowances. From once a week, it was reduced to once a month. It would really starve me. There would be nights where I have to sleep with an empty stomach and skip meals just to save my money up. It wasn’t easy negotiating with your feelings and at the same time tame the monsters inside your intestines. The act alone immunized my system, and it seems like my body just adapted to the drastic changes the situation has set me in.

As the academic stages ascended to its harshest adversity, my situation went from worse to worst then even worse than the worst. I couldn’t believe I will experience eating once in a day, consume left-overs from nearby bakeshops. Sometimes, I have to go to fast-food chains and apply as a dishwasher, just to get free food as a compensation for my labor. I remembered the beggars asking for alms in the streets.

“What if I join them? In that sense, I won’t be hungry, and eating less in a day won’t hurt because I’ll get used to it eventually,” as I spoke to my mind. But I realized, “No, I’m more than these problems, I am not a quitter who dwells in shortcuts, I am more than the hunger I feel, I am more than my own loneliness and the pain that succumbs my faith. I have friends, I have Lynette, and we will graduate together, I will become a teacher, and Lynette will become a supermodel. Yes, I’ll call Lynette, and tell her that I haven’t eaten lately and that I missed her.”

I tried to reach her phone. No one answered. I did it again, now for the tenth time, my fingers were tired, I think I should go to her and make it more personal. I reached her apartment at exactly six in the evening. I noticed her apartment was all dark.

“Is she home?” I asked myself.

I called for her name, but I heard no one but silence. I felt cold and forgot I was hungry. I’m puzzled and I want my question to be answered, “Where is my best friend?”

The mysterious disappearance of my best friend that day made me think, “I’ll be on my own now.”

“Rain and dust blurring the busy streets. Umbrella of lovers embracing the thin cool air. Grey, gloomy skies sauntering over and the sun in its slightest shimmer winks to the warm clouds. I cried stones over the lost of a friend, when will this sadness come to its end? But, I have to breathe for life and break free, I know our roads will cross soon and so I start anew.”

I was awaken by the loud and excited sound of foot steps in my dormitory, I checked my phone, it’s five in the morning. I opened my window and the warm breeze of March kissed my cheeks, I could see the half-risen sun emerging and devouring the city with its glorious emissions. The silhouette of the tall skyscrapers surrounding the city were a magnificent sight to contemplate. The scent of freshly baked pastries in the nearby bakeshop seems to invite me for a cup of warm chocolate. Everything looked perfect. I rushed to the shower room and pore over how this day will turn out. Then I remembered Lynette and the day she disappeared. It’s been two years and still my question is not yet answered. “Where is my best friend?”

Here I am, on my graduation day. Half excited, half so-so. I still missed Lynette. I climbed to the stage and faced the crowd on their special day and had my valedictory speech as this year’s batch Summa Cum Laude. Everything was normal, like how the early birds catch their early worms. I thanked my dad who, for the first time attended my graduation. I thanked all of my contemporaries, the school, and myself. I thanked myself because I remained brave for four years and I remained Lynette’s best friend even if she’s only a memory.

After the celebration, I went back to my dormitory alone and did looked at myself in the mirror.

In a gentle whisper I told myself, “I am beautiful.” Then the words ran from my mouth again and again, until tears dropped like dimes, I missed Lynette so much. My tears lead me to my slumber and dried on their own.

The next morning, I knew exactly what I want to do. I will become a fashion supermodel. I will take the path Lynette dreamed and take with me the idea that she has inculcated-- I am beautiful.

I cancelled my state board examination and pursued modelling. It’s like back to square one, but simply in a different direction, with different people, and a different goal. I went to go-sees and came across people in all walks of life. There were those who appreciated my efforts, commented on my weaknesses, and envied my success. I thought the road to the top of this industry is difficult, but the truth is, it’s only a walk in the park. It doesn’t require good looks nor a beautiful personality. I have met models with bad character, spreaders of negative rumors, and the insecure ones, and I don’t care much because at the end of the day, you don’t sell yourself, you sell clothes and promote them to the public. That’s what I understood.

In every fashion show I get booked in and in every camera that flashed me in candid, I realized I’m becoming more Lynette. In every Versace that I unzip I’m becoming more expensive and sophisticated. In every Gucci, or Prada I use to pack my clothes in, the more it defines my socio-economic status and in every country that I visited for my fashion shows, New York, Tokyo, Rio, Paris name it, the more I realized that the world is seeing me like how I wanted it to be. I was in the limelight, and I’m loving the pleasure that comes with it. I met gentlemen whom I danced and flirted with. I fell in love with the scent of money and fame. I had boyfriends and girl friends, enjoyed their company and hated their sympathies. I’m becoming more of Lynette, the envious, discontented and anorexic Lynette, who drugged herself to death.

The lights breathed back and the audience were still, as if they’re waiting for a quick recovery and without qualms, my overflowing confidence told me to stand from the fall. I picked myself up and faced the inaudible spectators with my convincing smile and poise. No one will stop me from where I am heading. This is the most beautiful accident that happened to me and its wounds are engraved in my soul and this, I will own forever.

I finished my walk and drowned with the crowd’s applause. I went backstage to change on my final look, with the same old routine, a dab of powder, and swipe of lip gloss to add to my shine.

“Models, in 3, 2, 1…” as the floor manager instructed.

I came out wearing Lynette in my core. I felt the world in my shadows, and the crystal embellishments singing in its melodious grand—the tune of victory.

In every step I take on that runway, I knew in my blood it was Lynette walking inside me, It was Lynette smiling and airing every single fierce mien, and the Lynette I envisaged of becoming.

#becomingLynette2017 shortstory

[dawnaress]

Tyra Banks burst onto the modeling scene in the early '90s, but not everyone was ready for that smize. Banks has talked about the unwelcome reception she received from fellow catwalker Naomi Campbell before — a whole episode of The Tyra Banks Show was devoted to the drama between them — but she discussed it further in a new interview with the Wall Street Journal. She said Campbell was "awful" and "evil" to her and tried to end her career. Banks spoke of her “very painful early days in Paris." While she booked 25 shows during her first runway season in 1991, she said, "People didn’t know I was going home at night crying my eyes out because the woman I was looking up to seemed like she just didn’t want me to be there and was doing everything in her power to make me go away."Banks said Campbell, who soared to stardom in the late '80s, was "so awful" to her. She recalled thinking the British model’s behavior was "evil."Banks was also quick to clarify that, in her mind, there was never a rivalry between them.“It wasn’t a rivalry,” Banks, 45, said of Campbell, 49. “I’m very sensitive to that word because a rivalry is between two equals to me whereas one was very dominant, she was a supermodel, and I was just this new girl that had got on a plane from Paris and was studying fashion and magazines.” Banks did say that she now realizes that the industry pit them against each other. It was as if there was "only one spot available" for the “token” black model."When I came on the scene, [it was]: 'Naomi, look out. There’s a black girl that’s going to take your spot,’” Banks said.She added that it wasn’t the same for the white models, including Christy Turlington and Kate Moss: “They weren’t like, look out, another brunette is on the loose.”In 2005, Campbell appeared on Bank’s daytime chat show and the women got candid about their decade-long feud. In it, Campbell apologized for the way she made Banks feel.  And while the women — who have worked together, including at Victoria’s Secret Fashion Shows — made nice, Banks said in 2016 that “to this day, I’m very scared of her.”

#Tyra Banks

[antmfunny]

So we got confirmation that there will be a Cycle 24 of ANTM. And perhaps even bigger news that Tyra will be resuming her hosting duties.

Yay?

Look, as a fan and blogger of ANTM, I’m excited to have kooky Tyra back helming the show because she makes the show so ridiculous. I’m excited to see her face plastered all over the house and for her to teach us new words that she’s made up about modeling.

At the same time, I worry about the longevity of the show if they’re switching hosts already. Maybe Rita Ora wasn’t the perfect fit, but she was a step in the right direction for A) appealing to a young audience and B) developing a model that can make it big in 2017. I think a lot of the audience liked the new new tone of the show over the campy shitshow Tyra was running the past several years.

Tyra told the press that “ANTM fan base[’s] deep affection… led me to have a change of heart” about hosting. The people demand more Tyra! And Tyra is going to oblige if it means being in front of the camera. I thought her newly announced America’s Got Talent hosting gig would satisfy that itch, but she’ll take all the attention she can get. It’s more like America’s Got Tyra - whether you want her or not!

Remember, Tyra’s full of shit. She said she decided it was time for ANTM to end back in 2015 to try to gloss over the CW’s cancellation. Then she said she needed to pass the baton to a new host, when all evidence points to VH1, probably correctly, wanting a fresh face for the franchise. The second they were willing to give her a shot, she’s literally tweeting, “Mama’s back!”

Did you catch that interview with Tyra earlier last week where she said she wanted to hand over hosting duties all the way back in Cycle 8, but the network wouldn’t let her? The poor thing suffered through hosting for 15 more cycles when she didn’t even want to. She does this for the future generations of models, not herself, you hear?

Also, in the same interview when asked whether she’d ever host the show again, Tyra said, “I don’t really think so. I’m hoping that we can continue to be successful where we are... getting them to a place where the show can live without me.” Clearly, this host shift-up wasn’t even in the cards a week ago... but all VH1 had to do was ask!

I feel a little bad for Rita. She kissed Tyra’s butt SO hard during that final episode. That’s precisely what Tyra would want from a successor… aside from an opportunity to reascend to her throne.  

The initial gossip about an impending host switch-up blamed two things: a ratings drop in the second half of the season and Rita being “sometimes unprepared” for her job. Rita didn’t seem unprepared to me, and it’s not like the audience tuned out because of her. The ratings drop corresponded with the timeslot change to Wednesdays when the show no longer had the benefit of a Love & Hip Hop lead-in.  

But anyway, cool. I’m ready for Tyra to smize, tooch, and scream her way back into my heart whenever the next cycle airs. At this point it’s unclear what this means for Ashley, Drew, and Law, but let me just say that if Janice really does want to come back, then please give her the job.

P.S. And sorry, I’ll post the final update for this cycle soon… but I’m pretty distracted by March Madness right now, as I’m sure is the case with all of you. (Just kidding, I don’t imagine there’s a lot of overlap between college basketball and ANTM fandoms.)

#ANTM #Tyra Banks #Rita Ora #America's Next Top Model #Top Model