#so yeah...no problems with the job so i am like 'where is it?! where is the problem?!'
Text
popes new gig as a driving instructor was meant to be easy money. he was a good, safe driver — and you were his first ever client. but from the smile you’d given him, all glittery and pink as you bounce over to his car and lean over to his driver seat window to greet him, giving him a direct look down your cleavage — he knew you’d do more than learn driving from him.
you preened under his praise everytime. it was distracting. he was trying to teach you how to safely drive, but everytime he’d let “you’re doing really good, keep going.” or a simple “good job.” leave his mouth you’d nearly swerve off the road. his subtle tips and adjustments would be met with flirtation, and giggly “yes sir”s to the point where he’d forget the rules of the road in an instant.
this went on for weeks, and due to his best friend jj’s constant lecturing regarding; ‘dude, you’ve got a hot ass girl in your car, practically begging for the D — you’re telling me you haven’t swooped on that yet? do better, man.’ pope decided enough was enough. this was either going to fix his problem, or make things really awkward— but it was a risk he was willing to take.
“pull up right here, in this parking lot.” he’d been extra tense that day, rather quiet the entire lesson with a stiff jaw and eyes hung low. you figured he’d been in a bad mood, and even went easy on your usual routine of finding reasons to touch his bicep at each stop light and flirting with him. you did as he said, pulling into the empty lot and finding a space somewhere in some dark corner where it would be easy for you to park.
without the humming of the engine filling the silence now, you turn and look at him in the dim lighting. pope often had two ways of going about things with women — either ultra nervous, or ultra to the point. with you, he’d started off a nervous wreck — practically jizzing in his pants every time you’d graze your manicure against his arm for the first few lessons, but due to the constant teasing he’d been driven to being directly upfront with you.
“look, i can’t take all this teasing anymore.” he stresses, brows creased. your giggly smile drops a little bit, seemingly switching on the innocent act. “every week, you hint and hint that you’re tryna get into something with me— and then at the end of the lesson, you just get out and walk away like it never happened.” he sighs hard, and you have to admit it’s rather cute.
“i’m sorry…” your brows knit together, guilt evident in your expression.
“and that’s fine — i would never pressure you to do anything like that, and believe me — i know this is completely unprofessional to be proposing on the job, and yeah — this could get me fired,” he rambles, working himself up. “but look, i’m a man okay? i am biologically programmed to have a bodily reaction to girls like you who can’t stop touching on me and being all adorable and sexy. that being said — if you wanna fuck, let’s just get it out the way, right here right now— and if not, we can drive you home, and never talk of this again. but you gotta stop acting like that, ‘cause i’m in pain.” he finishes up with his rant, sucking in a breath that he didn’t know he’d been holding the entire time. you stare at pope. pope stares back.
“oh fuck, oh pope!” you mewl into his neck as the car jostles violently from the backseat beneath the dim lighting on the parking lot. you’re naked from the waist down, and his shorts sit pooled around his ankles as you bounce on his cock, dick impaled through you. “s—so big, just like i imagined!”
“you imagined?” he pants, two hands planted on your waist as he helps you fuck down on his lap, staring up at you hopefully as he lifts his hips to meet your movements.
“every night! pictured you punishing me for bein’ such a tease!” you cry out in admission, halting the bouncing technique to roll your hips instead, the two of you groaning at the sensation.
“jesus, okay… well, i can definitely make that happen. you for sure deserve to be punished.” he babbles, pulling you closer — his eyes fluttering shut as you grind on him.
“are you g’nna punish me pope? for teasin’ you in our lessons?” your voice cracks desperately as you feel him repeatedly jutting against your g-spot, making your legs shake around him.
“yes. totally. i’ll punish you real good.” he spits out. it had been a while since he’d got his dick wet, especially from such a perfect princess — so all his concentration was going into making sure he didn’t bust right there and then. he simply agreed without thinking, he probably would have agreed to anything in that moment.
151 notes
·
View notes
Text
Can I be transparent for a sec? Mmkay.
I lost my job back in January over some racist ass mean girl shit and I haven't been able to find a job since then. It's almost may. By the grace of god, am I still held together but man if a bitch don't cry.
Bills never stop. Life don't stop. The fact that some over aged bully brought problems to her SECOND job and got an innocent black woman fired is crazy to me, I feel like they even blackballed me ya know? Nobody wants my ass.
Soon as I send the application off, it's coming back with a fat red NO on it. And I ain't never not do my job, so to pats that off as the THIRD and final excuse as to why you fired me is crazy.
Almost two years and still had that key in my possession til I brought it back to her ass, after she fired me. There's bitches that didn't even have codes to get in the building! I had that AND a key! Mind y'all, this was my second boss. First one got fired cause she truthfully ain't do her job, but me, always on time and ready to do my job.
We got paid $12 and hour! Who tf ain't finna do this silly shit? All I do and ring bitches up. So you saying I never rung a bitch up? Never opened/closed the store? Never cleaned my area? Never did a return? Never help a vendor? Never turn the fountain on/off? Never turned the lights on/off? Tv, either? Never put anything back? Never took something down for someone? Never carried something out for customers, which i eventually stopped on my own cause I ain't finna be no liability. This is not Lowe's. Never answered the phone? Nothing?! I just came to work and disappeared to narnia, apparently, and have y'all my ass to kiss? Yeah, okay. And how do y'all think that'll stand with no paper trail to back it up.
If I NEVER did anything, why was I still here and never written up a single time? You were my boss for five months and never wrote me up? Didn't confiscate my key? CONTINUED to let me open the store up? Tried to make me your errand girl? Picked a bitch who don't even clock ten hours a week your part time assistant manager but kept running to ME when shit would get weird and if redirect your ass to your OTHER assistant manager, because EYE do not get paid to be a secretary. Remember who you gave that job to, especially after being warned that she wouldn't be able to do the job.
Y'all, what the fuck is a part time assistant manager? Any other assistant manager we ever had clocked the full 40, cause it's a REQUIREMENT. Duh. Now part time and full time employees? Sure, but nothing else. Can't be a part time manager of a fucking establishment, that's so ass backwards.
So who would be asked to open the store a LOT if the other assistant was on vacation or whatever? Me.
If a bitch didn't ever do her job? Why call on me? Rely on me to fix problems with certain customers because you knew I'd handle it. Hell, I was helping this girl sell spaces in the store! If I never did my job? Why constantly ask me how many hours I wanted? Tell me about the other girls and how they're not doing what you want and yadda ya.
When girls started quitting, I took those long eight hour shifts to the chin to help you out. And you thanked me! Y'all she was on the phone talking to my assistant manager and they got me right before I left work to thank me for staying so late and being the only one to step up and be a team player and they appreciate me (mind yal I don't care about team player bs it just felt nice to hear that I was appreciated) and all that, just to turn around a MONTH later and say I never did my job?
I got fired over the phone because she knew how it woulda went down in person, but she also thought I wasn't smart enough to fight. First mistake.
This feels like a book lmao I'm knowing y'all prolly don't care but I just have to write this out somewhere, I just have felt so sad and angry.
Anyway. Painted tree is a boutique where people sale their wares, handmade jewelry, food, clothing items, candles, paintings, etc. you could either buy a kiosk or a booth and you were responsible for that and that alone!
So of course, there's vendors that sell shit outta their house cause they know nobody is paying attention, one of them any things this new manager was being brought in to fix cause it was starting to look like a hot mess, I'm not gonna lie to y'all, but I just worked there so whatever.
Of course me being me, I would also make a point to say something every now and again because you can't have us giving a spiel to the customers about the store, while not making sure that your current vendors are following those rules we're giving the new ones! Like???
Old manager was even telling her assistants to sale the spaces sight unseen and why make me privy to this cause you know ima tell y'all how illegal that is!
So the same part time assistant manager is involved in what ended up getting me fired. We started around the same time as cashiers and she's been trying her hardest to get this promotion at her other job, the full time job, but she's up against some sixty year old lady who's been in the company forever, so she's got seniority. Y'all already know how this ends up going. Shorty ain't get the promotion, right around the same time she gets promoted where we work.
On top of that, her husband should choke on something. I won't get into that but there was a point where she'd cry to us about him leaving her and even pimp herself to customers! I'm talking about"if y'all have any single daddies, older brothers, friends, tell 'em I'm ready to mingle!"
Inappropriate.
During the same time, Christmas Eve of 2022, to be exact, we get a text from our manager that the power was out and whoever was scheduled wouldn't have to worry about coming in. So I'm like sweet, see y'all Monday, merry new year whatever.
Of course this bitch gon text back and ask about the possibility of the lights coming back on and I'm like oh my god really. So managers like I'll let y'all know if I hear anything and get y'all to come in. Of course.
So what we ain't know was that this girl was camped out in the job parking lot, waiting to see if the lights came on.
Sure enough they did, cause why not?!?!? And she calls manager and tells HER that SHES gonna drop her kid off, change her clothes and come back to work! Told HER manager what the plan for the day was and you know it actually went down?!?? Cause she was a known snitch at head office, they don't like this girl! Our manager told us that they don't like her.
Anyway, so of course we have to come to work for like three hours and it's a waste because there was like 10 customers at most! My co worker and I are giving her shit because why were you in the parking lot waiting for the lights to come on?! You had nothing better to do cause your husband still hasn't come home?! DO NOT MAKE THAT MY FUCKING PROBLEM WHAT THE ABSOLUTE FUCK?!
She's telling the customers that we're making her feel bad and I'm just saying "good, I hope you do feel bad" got our asses at work for nothing, yeah feel bad! I could still be in the bed! Last minute Christmas shopping my ass! I'm mad!
So why does she end saying she wants to leave early?
Not the same person who said we should thanking her for getting us more hours? Not the one who was trying to gain sympathy from the customers? NOT THE ONE WHO CAMPED OUT IN THE PARKING LOT?!!!!
When I say my head swivelllllllled, it almost came off. All my coworker did was stare at her but eyeeee had words for her ass.
No way you just said sumn bout leaving early??? You literally waited for the lights to come back on so you could get us to come to work! We're here and only been here for like 2 hours, maybe her 3, and you wanna leave early?! You ain't going nowhere. If anything ima hitch a ride with coworker and we gon leave you here to lock up. That was funny of you to think you were leaving early.
Shoulda seen her face, like dare you!
I said if our manager goes for it and you leave early, I got words for her too. I bet she ain't get work early.
My manager and I even agreed that she was being ridiculous to even ask that question, being the one who made us come to work!
Yeah she ain't like me ever since that, but she also ain't buck her shit after that either.
So when we get our new manager, she feels like she got someone on her side because let me make note that the old manager was the best friend of the assistant manager that she works alongside now. So the playing field is leveled now.
So my sister and I have a kiosk to share, my art and her baking. We get both of the week and I make it look all pretty with our candy jars and cookies and paintings and jewelry that my mom made and what have you.
I come in a day before my week is up and my stuff isn't there. In fact, that now part time assistant is standing in front of a table, taking down a coffee display.
Do we do this on Saturdays? Absolutely. Do we use the other side to display our coffee so these booths of the week can still be presented? Also, yes.
So why is mine the one you MAKE SURE you take down? Right.
So I clock in and tell my assistant manager that I needed to go to my booth. I go to my booth and our stuff is out back crazy! I call my sister while I'm putting everything back. I mean candy dishes on the edge of the shelves, my paintings on the floor, cookies put behind things. Like she just dropped it off and kept it moving.
So were upset and I call my manager and let her know what's happening and she's telling me head back up front cause conveniently both assistant managers were leaving early so I needed to watch the front so I'm like okay just call her and tell her that I don't appreciate her just throwing my stuff around and she assures that she will.
So that ended up being translated like something to brush off cause when I had to call her back cause I couldn't find one of my stand to my paintings, which I ended up finding in the office on a shelf?! Which also ended up not being a big deal to my manager which I noted was not cool, she just kinda passed off a message like we she didn't know where your things went.
She coulda left my shit where it was sitting and let me know to move it when I got in. Could moved it into the office and let me put it back myself. I got agreement on this from my manager. So I'm just like okay whatever just tell her not to touch my stuff anymore if that how she's gonna do me. That was the end of it for me, cause just let me get my money pls.
So the next day we work together again, and like any other day we do not speak to each other cause she's wishy washy and I don't get paid to speak to you nor do you get paid to speak to me. So I speak to my other coworker cause she's not an asshole to me and I go about my day.
Why does the next day roll around and my manager asks me what do we need to do to solve the tension? I'm like what tension? I'm good. When she wants to start treating me like a human, then maybe she'll get so here with me but EYE am not the problem here?? I didn't do anything to her??
She's like, well she told me that you came in and didn't speak to her but you spoke to everyone else.
I'm sorry, I'm we in high school? Didn't I tell y'all that we are not friends? I know I've told y'all that so what's this about?
I told her that I'm not rolling out a red carpet for this girl and making her feel comfortable cause she's definitely not doing that for me! Like be real! Be serious! If I told you every damn time she ain't speak to me, you woulda been tired of me long time ago! I don't come to work for that! Tell her come talk to me and I get a comment about my attitude and I shrug it off like okay haha cause I'm not confrontational all the time, it didn't cost for that ya know? So the comment was unnecessary.
So a couple days go by and I end up texting my manager to chat when I got to work later that day just letting her know that I needed to get everything off my chest about this while situation cause it was starting to bother me how the whole thing was being handled.
In that conversation, I pretty much reiterated that I just would like to continue doing my job and not worrying about catering to anyone's feelings, cause we do not get paid for that. This girl had been treating me like an outcast for a whirl and it feels racist sometimes and she's quick to defend her cause duh and I tell her that I don't need anyone to tell me what they think about it so pretty much like girl save it, I still think it's racist and she tells me to send part time assistant manager a message to say like here's where we stand and we don't gotta get along but we gotta get back to work and let it be.
So I'm like ok cool, I type it up in my notes and send it to my homegirl like girl read this and lmk what you think cause she privy to everything that's been going on!
She like that's cool but I don't think sending her that will make a difference, cause I agree with you that she should do her job just mediate or something instead of getting you do it! Remember, YOU didn't do anything to her!
So my sister came right around that time cause she was picking me up, also putting labels on her products cause again we own a kiosk, and so I tell her about it and she immediately is like do not send her anything cause they can use it against you.
So part time assistant manager ends up coming in and when I say she beelines straight for the office, she almost hurt herself getting in there.
So my assistant manager ends up telling me that if I wanted to go home early o could cause we were really slow so I was like yeah I'll see y'all tomorrow, byeee
So a couple hours later, I get a text from my manager asking me if she could call me. I already knew what it was but I'm like there's no reason why she would do that.
So she calls me and someone from corporate was on the other line! wtf? So she goes into this spiel about cutting hours and then abruptly says that here's where we part ways.
So I'm like why am I getting fired? She dances around the question and goes on to say something about an attitude, and so I ask her if it's about the situation between we and ptam (got tired of writing that out) and if it is about that situation, is she also getting fired? Cause never did I speak to that girl about any of this, it was my manager and I talking. And she doesn't answer any of what I asks, she just keeps going back to its best that we do it like this and I'm like why? She then goes on on to say she knows I wasn't happy and I'm like how?? Why would I come to work to take your shift, both assistant managers and my own in this mf if I hated my job? Girl shut up! Like not making any sense?
So the lady from corporate takes over and starts talking like an inspirational speaker about how she met me and I can go anywhere and be the best I can be and there's better opportunities and I end up zoning out cause I'm just like how tf am I gonna pay my bills now? I don't have a job lined up. I cannot believe I just got died and she didn't even give me a reason— she thought I hung up and I'm like nah I'm here but I don't wanna hear anything else or continue this conversation, you want your key back? Cool. Do I even have a shift still, tomorrow morning? No, of course not. K, you'll get it back, bye.
Immediately I send a long email to corporate and tell 'em everything that's gone on, even told em how my manager has her boyfriend/fiancé drive an hour back down the road to another location for some damn labels because ours hadn't shipped out yet. This man is NOT employed there so there's no reason why he should be being employed to do her job for her!
I also terminated the contract for my stand cause now I'm no longer there to watch my stuff and if bitch gets away with throwing shit around once, she gon do it again. Told her rip that shit up.
Now my sister was mad at me but not for long cause she knew i was upset but I was NOT talking outta anger, I mean what I said but she wanted to see if she could figure out what's going on cause I'm not the only owner of the kiosk which is fair, so we head up to the job and the assistant manager that I worked closely with was there, looking like a deer caught in headlights. This is her norm but it pissed me off more than usual.
She tried breaking bad on me, telling my sister that I called this person and that person and told em all types of shit, now me being me again, I'm asking wtf I said cause when we first started asking her questions, she wasn't aware of this and that and wasn't even allowed in the email anymore lmao and for an assistant manager, that's a bold face lie to tell cause how the emails get answered? It's just you here, dummy! YOU KNOW WHATA GOIN ON BITCH!
So when I asked her what I said in the email she just said she wasn't allowed in, she gon smirk at me and say "you know what you said"... nah! Since YOU know what's in the emails, you tell ME what I said. After that she sobered tf up and that smirk went bye bye. She even backed away from the counter cause I was getting so agitated, and she's scared of me. We've also had it out before so she knows her limits and me not being her coworker anymore, she knew better than to test me.
So I end up separating from my sister cause the conversation was going nowhere, only for us to find each other again and assistant manager told her that I never did my job. Crazy as hell.
When I say I sent a total of three emails and called corporate and only one person responded to my email— the chief of staff, mind y'all! I'm thinking she finna come with it, right? Wrong. Everybody full of hot ass.
She telling me that there were concerns— none of which were brought me but ok— about my work ethic and there's claims from SIX of my coworkers that support me being away and not ready for work but clocked in, also multiple screenshots that support the idea of me not being fond of my job.
I asked that bitch to send me this concrete ass evidence so EYE can see what EYE said and y'all know I ain't get shit back. Not even crickets. Not even a tumbleweed, bitch.
One thing about me, ima ask to see the evidence. Y'all not finna act like y'all got something on me and not share it with the class?!? Come on, where's the fun in that?!
Couldn't take the time to fabricate some text messages or print out a write up and forge my signature! Nothing!
So when it came time for me to get my unemployment, of course they tried making that difficult too! But ima fight for myself. I've come to far in that, not to.
Got them ppl sending me questionnaires and in ever text box they provided, I went into lengthy detail about this whole situation, I was so tired of telling mfs that I wasn't aware of why I was even fired, it made me literally ill.
It was like I was talking in circles and nobody was listening to me, which is something that makes me physically violent. So something needed to be done asap, cause if I gotta sit my black ass at home, I'm getting my duckets in the meantime!
So I got fired of the 16th of January, right? On the 17th of February, I log into DES and guess who was approved for their well deserved mf money cause them bitches ain't have no evidence to support me never doing my mf job?! Yeah! YEAH!!!! I cackled all morning long bitch, it was so funny and hilarious and delightful!!!
But I've been looking for a job for the last three months and it's about to be May. By the grace of god and my mama do I still have money in the bank, but the unemployment is on its last leg and it don't know what to do. I just feel like a failure a lot of the time, it really sucks to keep getting rejection letters in my email but ima keep trying. Just don't know how much try I have left in me.
So yeah, if y'all made it to the end of my long ass diary entry, I appreciate y'all and hope y'all take care of y'all selves at these jobs cause they give not one fuck about ya, k? K, stay lovely and spicy 😘😘😘😘
18 notes
·
View notes
Text
me at 15 reading about ocd on the internet: oh that sounds like a nightmare I don't think I could live like that, so glad I definitely don't have it
me getting diagnosed 7 years later:
#in my defence it feels nothing like the stereotypes portrayed on tv#like I had a school friend who was obsessed with the show monk#I've never actually seen it so idk if it does a good job portraying it or not but I know monk is the very stereotypical ocd character#and that friend would go on and on about the show and how relatable it felt to her#not sure if she also had undiagnosed ocd but she only used a certain type of pen#and would refuse to use any other to write#she even got me into it I bought them and we would share#they were nice pens#and she also had this little ritual where if you touched her neck you had to close your fingers#in a way that mimics that stereotype for Italian hand gestures#and then you had to huff on them#she literally would not let you do anything else after you touched her neck unless you finished that little ritual#and I never thought I had anything like that so that meant I didn't have ocd right?#but yeah now that I'm saying it it seems stupid#like just because I'm not a “neat person” and don't obsess over cleaning doesn't mean anything#I say I don't obsess over cleaning and then I proceed to disinfect everything I bring from outside into the house with rubbing alcohol#but that only happened after the pandemic so I'm often thinking if it really counts#do I really have ocd or am I just traumatised from the pandemic?#like if I know the when and how I started a specific behaviour then is it really part of a mental disorder?#I know the logic behind it so it's not really a problem#right?#can I tag this as ocd? am I allowed?#fuck it!#ocd#I'm sure people who know more about this than me can explain if it counts or not#maybe it doesn't#maybe it's just germophobia?#but then what would all the other stuff be?#checking to see if your relatives are still breathing in their sleep in the middle of the night isn't germophobia#but I know the cause of this too it's from losing my uncle does that mean it also doesn't count? is it considered traumatic? idk
13 notes
·
View notes
Text
oh boy the depression hole is deep and it is muddy
hahaha I fell into the classic trap! overidentify with your job and considering leaving it will trigger an existential crisis!!!!
#red said#i think it's really fucking happening#i got lunch with my work bff yesterday. she's seriously looking for her next thing.#2 other people in our 9 man team have told me in confidence they're looking elsewhere as well#the work bff is a team manager and she's like yeah I'm helping everyone buff up their CVs and think about what they want#and i. do not think my boss is coming back.#she's extended her mat leave by 2 months already. i think she stepped away and realised. rightly. there's more to life than this shit.#it's not that the organisation is downsizing or any of us are in danger of redundancy#but the vibe has changed big time. it's so much more corporate and less interested in lived experience.#i think the proportion of people in senior management who have even second hand experience with homelessness is shrinking#like the last time our CEO did frontline work was like 1990. and they're expanding the management team constantly#but they're all outside hires and not people who've done frontline or community work. they're the career charity worker types.#the only things keeping me are. i want to at least get to that initial union open meeting and get the ball rolling enough#that it might have a cat's chance in hell of happening without me#and i want to get gears turning in the EDI group to get a commitment a) to acknowledge that we have a whiteness problem#and b) i want to use the funding for LGBTQ inclusion work to kickstart a project where we convene a cross-sector working group#maybe quarterly. where people working in homelessness and social support can discuss best practise for trans inclusivity#in one of the sectors where trans people are most disadvantaged in seeking support#but like if i can get movement on those things I'm fucking gone. cause the bits of my job that are my actual job?#i am getting nothing out of it now
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
oh my god.. a job for me.. historical pierrot beach performer lol
#also I'm obsessed with shows like this#I always forget about like 'people live in a fully historical way as a sort of half documentary half educational reality-tv ish thing' as#a genre but then every once in a while I remember and watch something like this and am so enamored#There was also one called 'manor house' or something where it was like normal people who aren't actually historians or anything#trying to live like how they did a while ago in some big manor or whatever which was interesting#not the drama really (there wasnt much but a few of the people on there were kind of annoying whenever they did get their#few little interview bits among the otherwise mostly explanatory nature of the show just focusing on how things#worked in mainatining a giant manor house)#though there's a lot of focus on edwardian and victorian times in these sorts of things. which is cool!#but I wonder if they have them for different time periods too. and different locations. what about 1500s france#1250s china. etc. etc. I dont know because like I said I always forget I like this type of stuff so I never look it up#omg.... guess what... (whispering to you as if we're friends and I'm gosspiing).. you will NEVER believe this..#you know 'Edwardian Farm' right? well.. I just found........ 'VICTORIAN farm'!#it's literally the same people doing the same thing but a different time period. And you know what? I will still eagerly watch every moment#ghbhj.. They could do 'Victorian Farm 2' 'Victorian Farm 3: Yet Another Show About The Same Stuff' and I would watch them all#ANYWAY.. also I feel like that could be my niche. Like because I'm Very Mentally Ill And Have Very Much Problems and have difficulty managi#ng ''normal'' jobs. But I LOVE menial repetitive tasks epsecially ones I can do with my hands. Like I could peel carrots for hours. I love#sculpting. etc. If I were ever in a position to learn a historical trade I think that could be My Thing. on these shows they always have li#ke 'The One Single Guy In The Entirety Of England Who Still Weaves Baskets Like They Did In Shropshire In 1805' or whatever and they#call him on the show and he's like 'yeah this basket took me 16 hours to make and here's how I do it' and it's like.. god.. I could be that#guy.. Like old style jewelry making. shoe making. all of these little tedious tasks to do crafting sorts of things.#It's just that like... when am I ever going to be in a position to LEARN that? You'd have to know someone who already does it#and be like tutored by them or etc. Which my social issues are a barrier gghhj.. and lack of resources/money to buy supplies. etc#but.. THEORETICALLY.. the dream.. ANYWAY ghhjhj.. I've been very busy all week but will try to do new poll adventure and other#stuff soon. I've had like two appointments and More Things Than Usual so just.. zero social media posting energy whatsoever#I do HAVE posts though.. pictures.. cat things.. costumes.. polls.. it's just.. brain says I have to lay on the floor all day instead#but at least I can ponder the absolute glee of a theoretical life where I am That One Guy in england who can make old ass gloves or etc.#If anyone in the UK has a dying grandpa with a near-extinct skill and YOU yourself don't feel like picking up the trade to pass it to young#er generations.. hmu and help me get citizenship and I will do it for you. even if he's evil and mean. I will MAKE those shoes
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
lmaoo not me on vacation missing my manager 😩 she's a real cup of sunshine omg.. i can Feel when we haven't had our one on one in a sec bc I'll miss talking to her and won't be as energetic bc i haven't had my fill for the week ૮ – ﻌ–ა ♡ we work in different offices but it's really really nice getting to see each other in person sometimes too bc she's so so pretty and rly fun and sweet and gives incredible hugs 😔💕🥰
we always end up hanging out n talking way longer than we need to, last time she was like omg yeah let me hurry up n finish so u can do ur thing and i was like listen.. i am never rushing u i love having ur company u are always welcome to stay as long as u want i can just work right here ૮ ᴖﻌᴖა take ur time ♡
#we talk and it gives me Strength fr it's not fundamentally motivational or anything i am simply a very gay girl having a great time#yeah it's some business but this is just some Girl Time 🤭 heyy girl what u up to#i look forward to seeing her again. I'm not in a rush to have to work again 😹 but god if there's a silver lining in it!!#our beloved executive director who isn't above rolling up her sleeves and doing The Work that keeps us going herself. regularly 😭#she helps our small IT work on tickets when she can and she goes between the two offices in our half of the state regularly#so it's rly helpful w knocking out some of the in person stuff too and like.#what i really really respect about her is coming from corporate the volume of tickets itself would be an issue and they wouldn't care How#it'd just be your job to figure out how to fix the problems w other teams and make them go away#where here she understands Why we have the tickets and is actually pretty in the loop on what's going on and is super#understanding and is just sorta doing her part!! and she's a busy gal!! yet she does it all and loves it and idk she's just really cool#like not just a leader in name but she really walks the walk you know? i love u girl i appreciate you
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
vent iii.
#yeah i could just make a 'read more' post but tags are better for me#more hiding#anyway#i have this problem where my sister is probably moving out next year but she can't rly do that without me bc her dog has issues#and i would have to take him out and feed all the animals while she's at work during the day bc nobody else can#but even with that being taken into account she would still charge me over double what i'm paying now for rent and i cannot afford that#and she says i'd have to get a job too but excuse me how am i supposed to work when i also have to be home to look after your animals??#barn job would be nice bc short hours but it also wouldn't be enough to pay what she'd charge me#so i'm screwed there#anyway i WISH i could make enough money to live on my own but i CAN'T#ik i probably sound very lazy and spoiled and i get that i am definitely priviliged to get to live at home for cheap rent#but it also fucks with my mental health so bad living here. and i want to live on my own but it's just not an option rn#i have dreams and they're such basic sad dreams that i still don't think i'll ever accomplish#like i want to live in my own small travel trailer. that's all. my own space. or a tiny falling apart cabin that i can fix up#that's all i want and it seems impossible for me#i'm not built to live in this world. my body and mind cannot take it. i have tried. i've tried so hard#honestly if i had to work full time again i don't think i'd actually be able to stay alive to benefit from it. it would burn me out too bad#there's no win for me#i'm still trying to figure something out but i'm honestly not hopefull at all
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
dunmeshi mithruncore (every day I can’t get up to make myself eat at all or get up to use the bathroom or fall asleep or actually do more to help myself unless im told to or someone physically Makes me do it or I finally manage to do so for the first time very very late in the day cuz I forced myself to out of fear)
#im in hell#that thing he said about not being able to sleep without magic or meds is so real#my sleep treatments even stopped working gradually#and if I don’t take any at all im laying awake until fuckinf 7 am#it takes me like an hour of holding it in to use the fuckinf bathroom#and the thing that makes me move is being terrified of kidney failure#it’s 6 pm and I still haven’t eaten my first meal of the day. tried ripping into a protein bar I had saved for moments like this but I can’t#make myself take more than 2 bites#the amount of times these past few years I’ve practically passed out from hunger cuz I just. cannot make myself get up to eat or make myself#something. omfgggggggff#I literally am a magic practitioner and have helped myself with spell work many times in the past yet I just can’t. make myself utilize it#more. yet I have all these books and supplies to use. and I’ve studied for hours and hours and know what to do#and it’s crazy cuz when im high off the sleep treatment THEN I actually do things but I don’t wanna use that more cuz im afraid of getting#addicted uhm. yeah idk what to even do anymore#my bf helps tremendously with leading me to do things but I don’t wanna take advantage of him too much and he’s long distance#but jesus fuck im literally on adderall now but its my emotional problems that keep it from working#it’s like wtf happened#I can’t fucking do anything unless someone’s there to guide me through it or keep me engaged as I work or they push me to in some way#and it’s like wow. cuz I want independence more than anything#it’s crazy cuz I related with his old self to the T especially with the desires and competitivity problems and trying to gain things he#doesn’t even actually want just for leverage and a sense of worth and the ‘if im not on the top on everything i dont have actual worth’thing#and other stuff I can’t remember off the top of my head. and I actually had friends and was more talkative#but now it’s like#🪿#yk what I mean#there’s a shitload of other things I relate too hard with but I can’t remember rn or I won’t mention cuz too much to go into#my bf said if he were around irl he’d cook for me and help with stuff when I go thru being like this nonstop which hey nice cuz obv id help#him with anything too#I mean there’s days where im better and can Do Things but it never lasts long and it sucks I can’t ever trust myself having a job or#I had all these things I wanted to do but I just feel nothing toward it and it drives me insane like can this maybe Not happen so often
1 note
·
View note
Text
.
#holy fucking shit i am so tired of constantly having someone hovering over me and never having a fucking day off#yeah sure as soon as I finally manage to get some time to myself where I have nothing planned you invite a sick kid over to make me sick#after I just quarantined for a week because I had to go do a thing with someone who ended up exposing me to covid#and it's so fucking exhausting to have to either play babysitter or fucking stay in my room for days at a time#and like genuinely I cannot fucking stand the fact that if I sit and try to do anything someone HAS to be in the same space as me#like I have nowhere to get away from anyone and I just want to be able to exist in my home for 3 days without entertaining people#and then start crying because I'm fucking pissed off that no one seems to care that I want a little bit of space and rest and you're talkin#about bringing a fucking kid over here to stay for every single day off I have#crying so that I can't be upset over fuckin anything#bullshit#it's actually so enraging that everyone seems to think it's my job to babysit their feelings and give a shit about them when all I have bee#asking for for MONTHS is that people stop bringing sickness around me and to have a couple of days off where I can rest#no one can give half a fuck about how I feel or if I'm okay but sure yeah no problem let me backpedal because you're a little upsetti
0 notes
Text
nothing gives me that kendall roy in secession kenergy quite like standing up to my mom via text then putting my phone on do not disturb because I fear confrontation
#i absolutely know that i'm a terrible person but like. she's had zero compassion for me my entire life#making me feel like i'm in high school again like gee mom i wonder why i stopped talking to you when all you ever ask me about is work#being so unbelievably picky but also a pushover fuckin sucks too like i can only tolerate this thing if it's this very specific way#but if you ask me to do this thing i hate and will hate forever then sure np np#when there very much is a problem. the problem is me#dw i've been in this depression anxiety spiral for the past two weeks it's fine#who cares about feelings when WORK amirite mom#you know what would make my anxiety so much better mom? being in a crowded public space for six hours a day where i am miserable#because high school did that shit to me and all i got was the unwavering feeling of wanting to kms#yeah let's just go back to that. why not mom#so all you can do is ask what about WORK why don't you WORK MORE and then you can MOVE OUT and be alone forever until you die at 30#because the isolation was so crushing but you just gotta WORK you gotta WORK that's all life is you gotta WORK#like. idk#i hate money. i just. and now i'm crying#i feel like i would only be happy in a freelance job really#freelance work from home. because that's what my college work was since i did it online. and it was so great#it made me love learning. and i want to do that#i can't go back to sitting in a room with people i hate for eight hours not even able to go on my phone i can't#i want to just do my work then leave. not sit there and wait#i can't
0 notes
Text
.
#vent#time for my regularly scheduled crisis#please hold for a regular lia to return#hhh#the problem with being a student who's rent and groceries are almost their entire living cost entitlement#is that you don't have anything to spare like ever#and add being disabled on top of that is that you cost more than you receive#i just. want small things and to not feel guilty over wanting them.#it also means that. who knows if i'm making rent at the end of this year. i might just. have to go home early again. which. i don't want#just to drop food costs.#and the thing is is that because our groceries fluctuate costs so much i physically cannot calculate how much i am spending#and like. how do i do anything about that? i literally can't#and i just want small things. like being able to get dried cranberries to snack on without my brain screaming at me#for wasting money#i've just. been in a constant thought spiral about so many things for the last month and a half. and nothing has changed or shifted#and i feel like i can't *do* anything about it#i dunno. like. i just want to be able to live without feeling like i am a drain on finances and the people around me#because i cannot fucking do anything.#like. longterm work? who the fuck knows if i'm going to be able to get a proper job where i want to be#and like. yeah i have a foot in the door but not nearly as much as i'd like and not for the things i really want to be doing#and i've had five (5!!!!) *professionals* reach out and then back out as soon as they realise that i actually charge for my services#like. what the actual fuck. yeah i'm going to make you pay me for my fucking labour?????? and it's like. how the fuck do i go on from there#one of these people had a 150k manuscript they thought i was going to sensitivity read for free. like. what the fuck.#and i keep getting excited because i like doing that stuff i enjoy it#and like. in general maybe an extra twenty a week would make the difference for me. that's *it*. but food costs keep being raised#and our living costs aren't raised to match#and the same happens with rent#and i just. don't know what i can even do about it#sorry. this is. just weighing on me#like always tbh.
1 note
·
View note
Text
take a deep breath
everything’s going to be okay
#do I want to cry?#yes#am I going to?#no#I think it’s going to be okay#I just it’s one of those times where I wish I wasn’t the way I am#my boss wasn’t like harsh or mean or anything#and I get it#like I haven’t had a in person job since the summer#so being able to actually talk to people felt really good#and I did get carried away#so yeah understandable#outside of talking to my boss and adding info once while I was on desk I haven’t done homework#so was a little confused about that comment#cause one of my class projects involves the library#i didn’t think it’d be a problem to work on a poster for a conference she told us to register for#just cause she told us about it and encouraged me to send something in#but I get that one like there’s a lot of other things I could’ve done#but at that time my thot process was she told us about it#she saw me working on the poster#and didn’t tell me I shouldn’t do that while working#but it’s okay#she’s told me what I need to change#(i.e. don’t do those things but also ask questions if I don’t know what to do)#now I know#don’t chat don’t do hw/conference things and ask her questions#halfway through writing this the group chat cheered me up (unbeknownst to them) so#feeling a lot better just cause of that
0 notes
Text
places where the audio distorts
image ids under the cut
tmagp 4:
tmagp 5:
tmagp 7:
tmagp 8:
the audio distorts when people lie.
I imagine this knowledge will come in handy later.
[id: ALICE: This is not something you go poking around in. Not if you want to keep your job… or your neck. SAM: (a little amused) Okay, okay! I get it. Consider me scared straight. "Consider me scared straight" is highlighted. end id]
[id: LENA: Now, while I understand your concerns, you need to understand that Colin has held the IT Manager position for some time without incident, and although he is somewhat… frustrated with his current assignment, he can request help from the central IT team at any time. I am certain that should he find his responsibilities unmanageable, he will request assistance. Or resign, of course. Either way, the problem will resolve itself. "Or resign, of course" is highlighted. end id]
[id: CELIA: Is there any way to look up specific files? ALICE: Like what? CELIA: Oh, I don’t know. Every case about… being buried alive, or meat, or… whatever. ALICE: Well, there’s a search bar, but it doesn’t actually do anything. You’d have to dig through them all manually. (suspicious) – Why do you ask? CELIA: Just figuring it all out. Ah well, I guess I’ll need to find Bigfoot on my own time. "Just figuring it all out" is highlighted. end id]
[id: GERTRUDE: I see. Well, I’m sorry, but I don’t think Gerry can help you – GERRY: (casually) Yeah, I barely remember any of it. "I don’t think Gerry can help you" is highlighted. end id]
[id: GERRY: Oh yeah, but I was pretty young. I remember filling in a bunch of forms and questionnaires, then some old men asking me questions about what books I liked to read, who did I look up to, that kind of thing. And then I left. SAM: (disappointed) That’s all? GERRY: Yeah, afraid so. Other than just sitting around with a bunch of other kids in a room that smelled like old books. "Yeah, afraid so" is highlighted. end id]
[id: CELIA: I’m trying to look into… Weird physics stuff: time travel, other dimensions, teleportation, all that good stuff. Freddy doesn’t really do searches, so you could keep an eye out and let me know if any come up in your cases? SAM: Uh, sounds a bit sci-fi compared to our usuals. What’s this for? (amused breath) You’re not doing research for that podcast you were on, are you? CELIA: (surprised) You know about that? SAM: I might have given you a quick Google. CELIA: Then… yeah. I’m doing a favor for Georgie. "yeah. I’m doing a favor for Georgie" is highlighted. end id]
#tmagp#The Magnus Protocol#tmagp theories#tmagp spoilers#original#most of these are relatively easy to clock as lies regardless#which makes sense. they need to be for us to notice the pattern and apply it later#but it does tell us for sure that Colin can't quit#or maybe he can but he won't be able to work anywhere else like Teddy?#in any case he (and possibly the rest?) can't quit in a meaningful way#if you find any I missed please let me know!!#why is this happening? who knows! Beholding thing maybe?
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
PUPPY LOVE ★ CS55
PAIRING ✦ carlos sainz x fem!dog sitter!reader
SUMMARY ✦ you work as a dog sitter, and you somehow wind up dog-sitting for a f1 driver. [ SMAU ]
WARNINGS ✦ cursing
NOTES ✦ reader lives in spain & can speak spanish, but isn't originally from spain ( you can decide where! ) i'm not a native spanish speaker, so please correct me if there are some inconsistencies! i know the dog i used for piñon isn't exactly accurate but please just pretend they look the same!! the fc i've used is christina nadin, but feel free to picture whoever you want! my requests are open so feel free to leave a request :)
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
liked by yourbsf, user1, and 205 others
yourusername i loveee my job 🐕💗
view all comments
yourbsf i think you love the dogs more than you love me
yourusername you'd be right about that ❤️
yourbsf mi mejor amigaaaa!! ( my best friend )
yourusername te amoooo💗 ( i love you )
user1 millie loveddd you! i'd love for you to sit for me again!
yourusername awww i loved millie too! thank you so so muchh 💗
carlossainz55
( caption: need a dog sitter! please reply with recommendations. must be located in Spain & can look after Piñon for just over a week )
yourbsf holaaa! my best friend is a dog sitter, and i'm sure she'd be happy to look after Piñon for you!
carlossainz55 That would be great! Could i have her instagram?
yourbsf sorry still in shock you actually replied LOL, it's @ yourusername!
carlossainz55 Muchas gracias!! ( thank you very much )
liked by yourbsf, carlossainz55, and 487 others
yourusername i look after a lot of dogs, but you will forever be my top bitch ( pun very much intended ) feliz cumpleaños daisy!! mami te quiere mucho 💗 ( happy birthday daisy!! mommy loves you very much )
view all comments
yourbsf FELIZ CUMPLEAÑOS DAISYYY!!
liked by yourusername
carlossainz55 Daisy es muyyy linda ❤️ ( daisy is veryyy cute )
yourusername siiii!! ( yessss!! )
user2 OMG CARLOS??
user3 SIR WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
INSTAGRAM DMS
carlossainz55 Hey this is y/n, right?
yourusername NO WAY THEEE CARLOS SAINZ IS DMING ME
but yes it is :) anything i can help you with?
carlossainz55 Your friend mentioned that you were a dog sitter?
@/yourbsf
yourusername yeah i am a dog sitter!! did you need someone to look after ur dog?
carlossainz55 Yeah I did, actually!
I was wondering if you could look after my dog Piñon for the week? I’m going to be away, and my parents are away so they can't look after him right now
yourusername OH MY GOD YES
i'm so sorry that reaction was so out of character 😭😭 but yes i'd love to look after him!
carlossainz55 Muchas gracias! I'll message you further details later if that's alright?
yourusername ningún problema! yeah that's fine with me! :) ( no problem! )
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
carlossainz55
( caption: Missing you already Piñon!! ❤️ )
yourusername
( caption: new best friend unlocked 🔓 )
carlossainz55 Umm he's actually my best friend??
yourusername nuh uh i've claimed him while you're away ❤️❤️
liked by yourbsf, carlossainz55, and 1,062 others
tagged carlossainz55
yourusername my latest charge is wayyy too cute 💗
view all comments
yourbsf can’t pick who’s cuter: you or piñon
yourusername we both know it’s piñon ❤️❤️
user4 wait who is sheee??
user5 carlos is in her likes!! i’m pretty sure that’s piñon she’s dog sitting ❤️
user6 whoever she is she is stunninggg!!
carlossainz55 Good to see that you’re looking after Piñon!
yourusername geniallll!! ( brilliantttt!! )
liked by yourbsf, carlossainz55, and 10,456 others
tagged yourbsf & carlossainz55
yourusername life recently 🪩
view all comments
user12 she is literally a goddessss!!
yourusername aw thank you baby!!
user13 y/n why do you look so angry in the first photo HELP
yourusername can’t remember but i think @/yourbsf had stolen some of my soft serve :(
user14 does she speak spanish??
yourusername when i was younger i moved to spain, so i can speak spanish fairly well!
user14 omg i can speak spanish asw!! eres tan bonita por cierto 💕 ( you are so pretty by the way )
yourusername muchas gracias!! 💗💗
user15 no daisy?? ☹️
yourusername daisy content will be returning, i promise!!
carlossainz55 ❤️
yourusername 💗💗
user16 stop theyre sooo cute i can’t handle it
yourbsf that pasta was so delicioussss
yourusername siii!!
user17 her replying to pretty much all of the comments is the cutest thing everrr she’s such a sweetheart
liked by yourusername
liked by yourusername, charlesleclerc, and 967,599 others
carlossainz55 Training almost over 🤝
view all comments
charlesleclerc new season about to start 🏎️
carlossainz55 Yess 👊
scuderiaferrari exciting times ahead!
liked by carlossainz55
user18 woweeee
user19 hand in marriage yes or yes??
user20 i’m waiting for y/n’s comment
user21 sameee!!
yourusername that viewwww 💗
carlossainz55 The mountains or me??
yourusername don’t flatter urself hon 😊
user20 @/user21 HERE THEY ARE
user21 THEIR DYNAMICCC UGH
liked by yourbsf, carlossainz55, and 12,567 others
tagged carlossainz55
yourusername last day w piñon ☹️💗 ft daisy!!
view all comments
user22 DAISY'S BACKKKK
user23 amamos a daisyyy!! ( we love daisyyy!! )
yourusername siii!! 💗
user24 ella es tan perfecta 💞 ( she is so perfect )
yourusername no tuuuuu 💗 ( no youuuu )
carlossainz55 Only one more day!❤️
yourusername ur saying that like it's a good thing :((
carlossainz55 You can always come and visit him!
user25 dont ask me why but i just KNOW she smells like vanilla
yourusername no stopp that's literally my perfume scent asw
user25 NO WAYYY LOOLLL
user26 @/carlossainz55 you taking notes??
liked by yourbsf, carlossainz55, and 15,788 others
tagged carlossainz55
yourusername PIÑONNN!! ¡daisy y yo hemos pasado el mejor momento contigo esta semana! te amoooo 💗💗 ( daisy and i had the best time with you this week! i love you )
view all comments
user31 NO MORE Y/N AND PIÑON CONTENT NOOOO
yourusername ☹️☹️
user32 okay but surely this isn't the end of carlos and y/n...right?? RIGHT??
user33 no it acc can't be i'll never stop crying.
carlossainz55 Thanks again for looking after Piñon!! ❤️
yourusername ofccc!! you WILL let me visit him or else 😁
yourbsf okay but ur cute.
yourusername you're cuterrrr
user34 guysss this isn't the end i'm so sure they'll still be interacting w each other!!
liked by yourbsf, carlossainz55, and 20,005 others
yourusername night away from the dogs 🌃
view all comments
user35 CARLOS CAN YOU FIGHT.
user36 hand in marriage?? 💍
yourusername betttt!! 💗
yourbsf MY BEST FRIEND LADIES AND GENTLEMEN
yourusername TE AMOOOO
carlossainz55 ❤️❤️
liked by yourusername
user37 SO WE ALL SAW CARLOS' COMMENT??
user38 TWO WEEKS ON AND HE'S BACK AGAIN
user39 idc they're too cute
liked by yourbsf, carlossainz55, and 25,922 others
yourusername 📍bahrain 💗
view all comments
user45 THE FERRARI MERCH SHE KNOWS WHAT SHE'S DOING
user46 she's soo soft i love her
yourusername 💗💗
user47 SO IT'S BASICALLY CONFIRMED NOW
user48 the press have literally basically confirmed it for them, we're all just waiting until they say it themselves
yourbsf my best frienddddd 😁😁
liked by yourusername
carlossainz55 Red suits you ❤️
user49 HURRY UP AND ANNOUNCE IT PLEASE.
liked by yourusername, charlesleclerc, and 1,456,991 others
tagged yourusername
carlossainz55 🏆 P3!! Great start to the season, and no one else I'd rather start it with ❤️
view all comments
user50 EVERYONE STAY CALM THIS IS FINALLY HAPPENING.
user51 BRB CURRENTLY SCREAMING
user53 PODIUM FINISH & HARD LAUNCH?? SOOO HAPPY RN.
user54 CARLOS SAINZZZZ ❤️❤️
yourusername 💗💗
carlossainz55 ❤️
user55 THE WAY SHE USES 💗 AND HE USES ❤️ MY HEART CAN'T HANDLE THIS
charlesleclerc about time 🙌❤️
user56 HA CHARLES IS A REAL ONE
user57 officially my favorite couple on the grid.
liked by yourbsf, carlossainz55, and 45,219 others
tagged carlossainz55
yourusername forza ferrari 💗
view all comments
user58 hey alexa, play lover by taylor swift
yourusername omg i love taylor 💗💗
user59 if carlos ever fumbles you pls hit my line
yourusername @/carlossainz55 you've been warned!!
user60 POWER COUPLE ALERT
user61 she's actually so perfect it's scary
yourbsf FINALLY. I'VE BEEN WAITING.
liked by yourusername
user62 KILL ME NOW THEY ARE ADORABLE.
user63 the way she still likes all of the comments actually has me crying why is she the cutest.
carlossainz55 siempre ❤️ ( always )
liked by yourusername
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
#f1 imagines#formula 1#f1 x reader#smau#carlos sainz#f1 fanfic#f1 smau#f1 social media au#carlos sainz x reader#carlos sainz jr#carlos sainz x y/n#carlos sainz imagine#formula one x y/n#formula one x reader#formula one x you#f1 x female reader#f1 x you#mclqren
1K notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
