#somewhat nightmareish

[yorksdreamjournal]

I had a dream that I was hired by a clinic as a doctor somehow without my knowledge but I had to show up for patient appointments anyway. I panicked because I am not a doctor, don’t have a medical liscence, have never taken a single course in nursing or medicine, but I was convinced that if I didn’t accept the job I would be in trouble for fraud somehow. I had a girl come in that was worried about breast cancer, and had to give her an exam which seemed so illegal, but I was as professional as possible and just looked for lumps didn’t find any, and sent her on her way. Immediately realizing I should have been wearing scrubs, gloves, and a mask, I again panicked and rifled through my stuff to find something suitable. I found instead a small terrarium with a leopard gecko and a toad, both starving. I fed them a ton of mealworms and the toad escaped. Suddenly a ton of people came through in Halloween costumes and I found my scrubs… old timey Victorian scrubs that consisted of a floor length blue dress, apron, gloves, and a mask. I went to my office to take my next client but all that was there were two stripper poles and a man I didn’t know dancing on one. I joined him and danced on the other pole

#dreams #weird #personal #somewhat nightmareish #stress dream

[skeleticals]

just wanted to say how cool this is cuz I genuinely didn't expect to get as engaged as I am. I really love how well elaborated the whole virus thing is as a big fan of anything undead related

#opq #chatter #I love when any undead related media is more original with what they make and specially when they elaborate the whole story so so well #like im so so engaged w opq. the whole thing of the creatures being somewhat related to electronics and the whole “low temps keep them from- #getting infected“ and I specially love how theyre able to get merged together and become this huge nightmareish creature.

[raisinchallah]

sometimes i think about the xena reboot and what i think they should have done and while idk if this is a good idea i think my ideas i would bring to the table would be ok so everyone discusses what do you do with the costumes since it would be a bit tacky to bring the leather bikini look back and so i think how u keep the silliness of the original costumes but keep them very distinct but maybe less boob armor is to lean more heavily into somewhat more historically accurate costume shapes and styles now historically accurate is of course very nebulous since xenas theoretical time period can span such a wide swath of ancient history and i would not want to change that so just u know dig into interesting historical costuming touches but from like everywhere just shit that simply does not look like anything else on tv so then u use really weird fabrics so u have like surprisingly accurate to surviving art and armor pieces type greek hoplite armor but its made out of hot pink pleather or something do you see and understand my vision and then very important next concept is i think they should also dig a bit more into weird and fascinating women from history and myth and xena should meet them inspire them have sex with them have weird history with them be insane exes with them etc obviously some of them should be in love with gabrielle too not just xena #equality i want like some deep cuts just for fun obviously they would have to do the sappho episode but its also a show i just dont know how it would keep the magic going if it was kept to season long plots the whole time like xena pulled off some very good long running plot arcs but always sandwiched between plenty of episodic fare that kept it more stylistically varied and shows that manage lots of stylistic variation and heavy serialization usually lean more onto an ensemble cast that have different types of storylines going on like im sure u could do a fantastic season of xena caught in a nightmareish revenge cycle with callisto and caesar and gabrielle feeling like shes got blood on her hands she can never wash off but wanting to stay with her anyways but u would lose the magic if every season was like that you know..

[oflgtfol]

god . YES. my dream/nightmare playlist is really comign together.. its not done yet like at all but its finally shaping into the idea i had

im so excited for when this will be done LOL

#ive CONSTANTLY had spotify recommending me my time by bo en and i was like #this is a really wild and wacky song but like idk how to use it #BUT FINALLY. FINALYL I CAN USE IT #IM SO EXCITED I CAN FINALLY USE IT FOR SOMETHING YJTHFGDSGH #its not done yet.. i want more of a transition between dream and nightmare #currently you're at the party serves as like. the threshold between the two #but i want more of a transition than just. One Song #and then life in technicolor is just a cool way to bookend it i think #cause its.. dreamlike enough to start off the playlist #and then end it that way after all these nightmareish songs its like. whiplash. haha #this whole playlist i just want to be the downward spiral of confusion and horror as a good dream turns into a nightmare #and you cant tell the difference between whats real and fake anymore #SO LIKE. ITS NOT QUITE THERE . BUT I THINK WE'RE GETTING THERE REGARDLESS... #MY VISION IS. SOMEWHAT VISIBLE TO OTHER PEOPLE NOW #brot posts #music #making weirdly specific playlists is like. a new hobby of mine for real #like i cant stop #never thought making playlists would be a hobby all of its own but like. here i fucking am

[bthump]

Hi! I have a question that's always bugged me. What is the in universe explanation for Femto raping Casca? (If there even is one) I mean, Femto no longer feels anything so it doesn't make sense that he'd do it to spite Guts. His petty existence is beneath him, afterall. All I can think of is that he somehow knew Casca was preganant and that he'd need their baby to be reborn, but it feels like a strech.

cut just bc it’s a longish post about a rape scene

Oh I definitely think it was to spite Guts. It can’t have been for demon fetus related plot reasons because Femto is fully intent on killing Guts and Casca after the rape scene. He tries and just barely misses killing Skull Knight when he bursts in to rescue them, and only hesitates and lets them escape after raising his hand to attack and then looking at Guts - the dude who makes him do irrational shit.

Like even if his heart is “frozen” I think it’s pretty strongly suggested that godhands and apostles are largely driven by the negative feelings that make up Berserk’s God and fuel their transformations. If Femto was genuinely meant to be emotionless then Miura failed really hard at portraying that lol, he’s a spiteful petty dick through and through, both here and during the Black Swordsman arc. Slan and Ubik both have some prominent emotions as well.

I mean in the Black Swordsman arc Femto tells Guts like 3 times, unprompted, that he means nothing to him, to the point where Void gets exasperated by their drama (”Enough of this sideshow.”) That’s not something you do if you actually don’t give a fuck lol, so I really don’t think we should take his “his petty existence is beneath our notice” at face value. Plus, I mean, a major theme of Berserk is blurring the line between monster and man, and showing that monsters are very human themselves, and Femto’s human pettiness fits right in.

In general I don’t think the Eclipse rape scene itself actually demonstrates any particularly good, in-universe reason for existing lol, I consider it gratuitous as hell and an absolute failure of storytelling, but inasfar as a canon explanation exists I’d say it’s spite. Like consider the 2 focal points of the scene: 1. Casca has an orgasm, 2. Femto stares at Guts the whole time. Out of universe it’s a weird emasculating cuckold thing designed to piss off readers who relate to Guts, as well as give Guts an additional motivation for hating Femto because Miura accidentally made Guts too gay for his rage to be believable otherwise I guess, and to write out Casca because she wasn’t around for the Black Swordsman arc. And in-universe it can only be the same, ie designed to piss off Guts lol.

I will say though that if you ignore how cheaply and exploitatively it was depicted and the focal points of the orgasm and the stare, and just take like, the basic concept of Griffith transforming into a demon and raping Casca, you can suggest that it’s a role-reversed power trip designed to spite Casca rather than Guts, considering Griffith’s (projected, Casca herself doesn’t contribute to this) sexualized vulnerability to her immediately pre-Eclipse, with the wagon scene and the nightmareish vision of future domesticity.

And there are other possibilities, also not really depicted in the scene itself but able to be read into it thanks to the surrounding context and story, eg: Femto demonstrating his own monstrousness to himself/”proving” to himself that he doesn’t care anymore; the culmination of the underlying, maybe accidental but oddly on point theme of denying homoerotic feelings through destructive displays of heterosexuality; a deliberate way of negating the good Griffith did in his human life when he saved Casca from a rapist/demonstrating his difference from human Griffith (though I think this is more thematic and less Femto’s actual motivation); and Griffith’s jealousy of Guts and Casca’s new relationship unleashed (actually I do think this one is actually depicted thru the stare as well as Guts’ own temptation to rape Casca “to get closer and closer to Griffith” later on, which sucks because it’s also the most homophobic interpretation lol.)

Anyway yeah, that’s basically my take on the Eclipse rape, it’s mainly spite but you can interpret it in some other somewhat more nuanced ways too, for better or worse. ty for your interest in my thoughts!

#ask #a #b #character: femto #Anonymous #theme: criticism #scene: eclipse rape

[dixnysian]

[ park jimin. twenty-two. cis male. he/him. | muse 23b ] idontwannabeyouanymoreby billie eilish just came on the radio and it made me think of remi moon. they’ve been in sundance for five years and they’re currently a dancer/cirque performer. if you’re looking for them, try by hardcore fitness, locals say they’re there a lot. [ cece. she/her. 21+. cst. ] 

but firstly, hey. i’m cece and i’m very scared and excited to be here! i was initially just going to start with my teeny blond son here but there will be two more demons coming your way because i have no thing called self control. anyways, i’m in the cst timezone and i’ve got a full time job that for some reason allows me to be on tumblr dot com so don’t expect to get rid of me too easily. like this post to plot with remi and stay tuned for further bad intros from urs truly!

tw disordered eating / exercise addiction , body image

spent the first 15 or so years of his life in south korea, training in dance & actually wanted to be an idol!

he had a supportive but somewhat strict family who wanted to see him achieve his dreams and so they pushed him, but only as hard as they thought he could handle. good people with good intentions.

he also studied english diligently and worked hard at his vocals because they weren’t his strongest point. he’s also his own worst critic and a perfectionist to a fault which will come to bite him in the ass

was actually accepted as a trainee and lauded for his wicked flexibility and dancing skills! but it was the start of a very swift downfall of sorts. given the encouragement and validation of a company, he overworked himself in the path towards debuting. 

the idol lifestyle can be a toxic one if not handled properly -- the constant pressure of having a certain image and dieting to maintain it -- and remi was a victim of it. one of several collapses eventually led to his discharge from the company, understanding he was taking his diet & exercise too far and that to continue wouldn’t be healthy for him. 

he was sent to a program in the states to get him as far away from the spotlight as possible and for a few years, he faded into obscurity. at 17, he signed himself out of the program and decided to stay in the us full time. 

the vibe of a completely different country was helping him shake off the depression that had come from dashing his idol dreams but also, like, the sense of independence made him feel like he was in control!

and began traning for a different way of using his dance.

kind of jumped from one intense interest into another and began training to be a cirque performer. again, that flexibility and whatnot came into play and he excelled quickly. chose sundance for its proximity to las vegas, obviously, and has been there ever since.

does street performances of his dance for extra cash bc he’s not making a ton yet 

i wouldn’t say he’s fully recovered but he’s doing better -- a lot of it has just switched more to a focus on working out and staying super in shape. his personality -- which had gotten lost somewhere in the shuffle -- was finally starting to blossom.

which, speaking of, personality wise, remi is super friendly but guarded. like he’ll make tons of surface level friends but only let a few in super close. he comes across very soft in that he’s a tiny dyed blond bendy little thing who likes to hide in oversized pastel sweaters even in the heat of the las vegas desert but y’know, he’s always cold so its fiiiine. 

don’t be fooled though, he’s not an actual angel. he can be bratty, particular, stubborn and holds grudges like a CHAMP. his perfectionist tendencies come out in that he wants to surround himself with perfect people so he gets whiny when things aren’t going his way. a lot of people find it endearing; a lot of people don’t. 

loves to go out and have a good time. dance and music are still in his blood and despite it being literally what he does for a living, it’s what he does in his free time too.

a little... free-wheeling shall we say once he’s had some alcohol in him. it’s all bets are off. a nightmareish lightweight who surrounds himself with party people who help him make many bad decisions. 

loves one night stands but also has a soft spot for being in love. like he doesn’t quite think he’s worthy of it but he had a brief stint in his rehab program and then maybe one other boyfriend once he moved out on his own.

SUMMARY: he’s an entry level performer (so not making too much but is on the career path to do what he loves) who is determined to climb to the top. very friendly but also keeps a lot of secrets in his bleached blond hair like, you’ll be friends for years and never know that remi isn’t even his real name. loves to be the center of attention but get’s self critical under the spotlight. literally his own worst enemy. oh yeah, and now he’s got a husband that he hATES. 

plot ideas

art hoes -- music, visuals, film etc

best friend from the subplot PLEASE 

party squad

bad influence but not in the devil on his shoulder, more like mutually make bad decisions

the ex from rehab 

the more recent ex boyf

anyone else annoyed with his childish whiny habits

alternatively someone super endeared by them ^

protective friendship

girl squad / sleepover crew to talk about boys

someone (1) who does know about his kidol past

um

neighbors? idk where he’s living now do u have to live with ur husband remi hopes not

one night stands

that’s all for now folks!

#sundanceintro #eating disorder tw #body image tw #me @ me: keep it SHORT #introducing || remi moon.

[felldragxn]

[Precious Gloom] Solid black with a slimy texture and served in a large mug. Smells like cherries.

[Sweet Tempest] // Alcoholic. Deep purple with bubbles and served in a small cup. Smells like snow.

[Icy Velour] Pale blue with gold sparkles and served in a mug with runes carved on the side. Smells like lime.

[Oblivious Willow] Dark brown with lots of bubbles and a stick of cinnamon in the mug. Smells odd.

[Wild Fluff] Sea green with a syrupy texture and a stick of cinnamon in the mug. Smells somewhat like campfire smoke.

[Ocean Starlight] // Alcoholic. Sky blue with silver sparkles and served in a large mug. Smells sweet. 

[River Kiss] Blue-green with white swirls and a pineapple slice on the edge of the glass. Smells decent.

[Innocent Earthquake] Copper with lots of foam and a cherry floating in it. Smells horrible.

[Hushed Touch] White with blue swirls and a bit of smoke coming from it. Smells nightmareish.

[Wild Tonic] Smokey grey with white swirls and served in half a coconut shell. Smells hellish.

[Rejects] Random pull from the reject box.

#e.tourney of shells #m.menu #m.the balmoral

[digiandromeda]

Post Canon Request - Yuya, Yuto, and Yugo have asked Zuzu, Lulu, and Rin to prom. Hilarity ensues due to the fact that all eight counterparts now share two bodies.

(A/N: YES!! ALL OF THE YES!!! only… japanese schools don’t have proms… so i went with the next best thing! also, this kinda ran away from me… it was supposed to be a drabble… now it’s at least a four part fic… I hope you enjoy!!)

The White Day Festival- Date 1: Yuto

“Does this look good on us?” Yuya asked aloud as he gave himselfa one-over in the mirror, scrunching up his red eyes. He had on a blacklong-sleeved button-up shirt under a short-sleeved gray and purple jacket. The openedjacket ended just above his stomach and had a turtle neck like collar, onlyheld together by a single gold button. His pants were gray and his shoes wereblack.

“I think we look fine.”An ethereal voice spoke from his right.

“I still say we shouldwear something white…” another one grumbled from behind him.

“Yugo,” a thirdmore exasperated, and slightly annoyed, voice spoke from Yuya’s left, “The girls are the only ones allowed to wearwhite.” Yuya felt a drop of sweat fall down his face as listened to his counterparts.He could feel the second one’s temper raising.

“Yuri,” the firstone warned, “calm down. There’s no usegetting upset.” Yuya felt Yuri’s mental eye twitch. “Yugo, please stop sulking… you’re affecting the rest of us…”

“Sorry…” came thetruly apologetic reply. Yugo meant well and his idea to ware white was a goodone, but the school specifically announced that only the girls were allowed towear white.

“Yuto, would you be willing to ware white on your next datewith Ruri?” Yuya asked the first voice.

They all felt Yugo jump with excitement.

“It’s your body, Yuya.”Yuto laughed.

“But it’s your date!” Yuya raised an eyebrow. “Besides, itjust as much your body now as it is mine.”

“Yuy-” Yuto startedto reply, only to be cut off by a call from downstairs.

“Boys, if you don’t leave now, you’re going to be late!” Yokocalled.

“Haaaahhhh…” Yuya half wined, half sighed as he grabbed hisduel disk and hurried out his bedroom door. He slid down the fire pole andturned towards his mom.

“Aw! You guys look awesome!” Yoko grabbed her son(s) into agiant bear hug. Before Yuya would have complained but after everything that hadhappen in the last few months, he decided he wouldn’t take things for grantedanymore. Plus, Yugo loved it!

Yuya’s arms wrapped around Yoko as a happy but goofy grinspread across his face. He gave her a big squeeze and Yoko laughed.

“Yugo!” She sung, knowing exactly which of her boys washugging her. “Try not to cause any trouble.”

“Yes, ma’am!” Yugo’s nervous voice replied from Yuya. Yokopulled away from the boy and leveled him with a no nonsense stare.

“That goes double for Yuri.” She ordered and a drop of sweatran down the back of his neck as his, now, light blue eyes widened.

“Don’t worry. We’ll keep each other out of trouble.” Yugoreplied.

“As much as we can,given the situation we’re in.” Came Yuri’s grumbled reply.

“You have no right tocomplain when we take control, to stop you from doing something stupid.”Yuya’s ethereal voice said dryly, a bit glad that his mom couldn’t hear them. “Neither do I for that matter…”

“Hm… that sounds like it’d be funny to see!” Yoko laughed asshe imagined the look people must have when her son suddenly did a 180 on hispersonality. “But seriously, boys, behave yourselves. Not everyone is used toyou and the girls yet.”

“Yes, ma’am…” Yugo replied solemnly, a frown on his face.Yoko smiled sadly, then leaned over and gave her son(s) a kiss on his forehead.Yugo turned bright red and sputtered a little.

“Here, don’t forget this.” She turned around and grabbed a giftbag from the table. “I’m sure the girls will love them!” she handed it to Yugo.“Now, off you go! And be careful on the D-wheel.”

“Yes, ma’am!” Yugo smiled brightly as he headed out the door.

*   *   *

“Yugo, I am SO glad you know how to drive.” Yuto’s voicesighed in relief as he took control and Yuya’s eyes turned gray. He pulled offthe red helmet, and goggles, and secured them to the D-wheel.

“Technically we all donow.” Came the nonchalant reply.

“Yeah… but I doubt wewould have handled that situation the way you did…” Yuya laughed nervously.

“Maybe we should takeYugo’s D-wheel next time…” Yuri suggested. “Less people will recognize it… No offence, Yugo.”

“None taken.” Yutofelt Yugo cross his ethereal arms. “Yuyadid beat Jack. It’s only natural people would be trying to beat him now aswell.”

“That’s all fine anddandy, BUT WE CLEARLY SAID NO!” Yuya raged and Yuto twitched at theloudness in his head.

“Some people don’t know how to take a hint…” Yuto mumbled ashe picked up the gift bag and headed towards the school courtyard, stoppingonce to make sure the D-wheel’s key was in his pocket.

“Some people shouldhave their license revoked!” Yuya seethed. He didn’t take well to beingrammed off the road, especially when they had someplace to be.

“Yuya, calm down…” Yuto whispered as he passed by othernicely dressed students. “We shouldn’t go into this event angry. It’ll onlyworry the girls.”

“Right… sorry…”Yuya did the ethereal equivalent of taking deep breaths and Yuto immediatelyfelt all four of them calm down.

“Oh the joys of sharingemotions.” Yuri’s mumbled sarcastically as Yuto walked under a ‘Welcome’banner. His sarcasms was met with three small laughs.

“Yuya!” Someone called from behind them. Yuto turned to lookand saw Gongenzaka running up to them. “Glad to see you could make it! That wasa pretty tight spot.” He reached Yuto’s side and looked him over.

“You saw?” Yuto winced. It hadn’t been the best ofsituations.

“You’re Yuto, right?” Yuto blinked in surprise, then nodded.It seemed their close friends were getting better at telling who was currentlyin control. “I saw it from the train. That was Yugo’s deck, so I take it Yugodrove?”

“He’s getting good attelling us apart…” Yuri stated.

“Well, he’s known mesince we were little.” Yuya laughed.“I would be hurt if he couldn’t tell usapart.”

“Yeah.” they resumed making their way to the courtyardpassing by even more students. All the guys were wearing nice, somewhat fancy,dark colored clothing, while all the girls were wearing white dresses. “Wewanted to get here quickly and Yugo’s the only one confident enough to go fastin traffic.”

“Ah, I see. That make since.” Gongenzaka himself was wearinga nice but simple black suit… with his red headband still on. “He didn’t goabove the speed limit, did he?”

“Of course not!” Yuto mildly exclaimed. “Do you know whatYoko-san would do to us if we did?” The horror was evident in his voice. Thefirst thing Yuto, Yugo, and especially Yuri learned was to not cross Yuya’smother.

“I can imagine!” Gongenzaka laughed. “So, are you andRuri-san taking the first turn?”

“Yes, Yugo is to hyper, Yuri… is Yuri, and Yuya is to shy.”He said quickly, before the other three could stop him.

“OY!”

“What is THAT supposedto mean?”

“Yuto!” game three disgruntled replies.

Yuto chuckled at their response and Gongenzaka joined him inhis laughter.

“I kind of wish I could hear the other threes reaction tothat.” Gongenzaka smiled. Yuto paused for a moment, then looked at the tallerteen.

“Do you want to talk with Yuya for a bit?” he asked.

“No, that’s alright. I talk with him all the time. It’s yourturn to have some fun.” He patted Yuto on the back, who stumbled forward a bit.“Look there she is!” He stated as they walked into the courtyard.

The courtyard was decked out in white and light pink bannersand streamers. There were fake white roses attached to all the trees and busheswhile a small stage had been set up in one of the corners. Paper hearts of red,white, and pink had been taped across the walls randomly and small signs hadbeen placed by each door.

Standing by one of the doors was Yuzu. Her hair was down withstrands from the front pulled back with a white rose clip. Her dress was awhite sundress with a light pink sash around her hip and another rose on herleft hip holding the sash up. The skirt of her dress was a bit puffy, due tothe tulle netting poking out from underneath it. She had white gloves on andwhite knee high socks, as well as pink Mary Jane shoes and a simple silver andpink heart neckless.

“I can’t tell which one of you is staring but you might wantto close your mouth.” Gongenzaka laughed.

Yuto jumped a little and slammed his mouth shut. His face wasbright red and he was 100% sure it was all of them staring, because heimmediately imagined Ruri in that outfit… and he was sure Yugo had done thesame thing with Rin. He wasn’t sure about Yuri.

“Sorry!” came Yuya‘s and Yuto’s panicked response.

“I wonder if havingfour boys in one body comes with four times the hormones?” Yuri mused.

“I Hope not!” Yuto exclaimed out load. Gongenzaka blinked atthe sudden outburst.

“Who said what now?” he asked.

“Ah… sorry,” Yuto apologized, “Yuri… is… well, let’s just sayhe comes up with nightmareish ideas…” the teen sighed.

“Thank you.” Yurismirked in Yuto’s mind.

“You would take that asa compliment…” Yugo dryly remarked.

“I see.” Gongenzaka raised an eyebrow. “Well, he is a… whatis that term? Troll?”

“Yes, yes he is.” came a heavy sigh. “Before we- …I head over to the girls. What are yourplans for the evening?”

“Not much actually, I received some obligatory gifts on Valentine’sDay so, I have some return gifts to hand out.” Gongenzaka held his chin inthought. “Although, Honda-san can’t have sweets and her injury prevents herfrom dancing, so I’ll probably spend some time with her.”

“Honda-san… That’s one of your classmates, right? What happened?”

“Yep. She’s in the martial arts club and had an… accidentwhile training.”

“Eesh.” Yuto flinched. “Well, have fun.” He smiled as hebegan to make his way to Yuzu.

“You to! Keep the other three out of trouble!” Gongenzakawaved goodbye.

“I will!” Yuto laughed.

“Why doesn’t anyoneinclude Yuto? Why is it always ‘The other three’?” Yugo complained.

“Because he’s the mostresponsible and the least likely to get into trouble.” Yuri replied.

“Yeah… but he has hismoments.” Yuya tossed in as he remembered his first duel against Edo. Yutoflinched at his counterpart’s words, knowing exactly what he was referring to,without actually hearing the others thoughts.

“That sounds like aninteresting story.” Yuri purred.

“For another day. Rightnow we have something more important to worry about.” Yuya replied.

As they made their way to Yuzu, she waved her hand at themand smiled.

“Yuto! You made it!”

“Why wouldn’t we?” He laughed. He stopped in front of her andsaw that her eyes were pink, indicating it was Ruri in control.

“Well, apparently you were nearly run off the road?” Ruri’svoice asked in concern.

“…” Yuto frowned. “Why does everyone know aboutthat?” Gongenzaka saw it but the girls shouldn’t have.

“Someone caught it on video… and posted itonline…” Ruri Answered.

“Oh, come on…” Yuto facepalmed. None of the boys had wantedthe girls to see that dual, much less anyone else.

“As long as you’re okay, that’s all that matters.” Rurismiled as she took Yuto hand. Yuto blushed as she intertwined their fingerstogether. “Where to first?” she asked.

“Where ever you want to go.” He smiled. He noticed theunusually bright blush on Ruri face and assumed it belonged to one of the othergirls.

“Then how about…” Ruri mused for a bit, lightly shaking herhead a bit as she mumbled to herself.

“Is that how we look,when we talk to each other…?” Yugo asked uncertainly.

“Probably…” Yurireplied.

“The Cosplay Café!” Ruri suddenly exclaimed. “They’resupposed to have a special dessert for couples.” She smiled broadly as she tuggedYuto into the school and up a flight of stairs.

“She moves fast!” aflustered Yuya declared. “No wonder youtwo are dating…”

Yuto held back a chuckle as he and Ruri dodged around thestudent’s in the hall. They passed by the classrooms, all of which had beentransformed into different types of ‘Booths’. There was a haunted house, amaze, a game room, and many different types of ‘Restaurants’.

Finally, they reached the Cosplay Café. It was, actually, thecooking clubs room, which had been transformed into a cute café. They walked inand saw small round table scattered about the room, each covered in a checkeredpastel colored table cloths.

“Please, sit where ever you’d like!” one of the club members,dressed as Cutie Honey, called to them as she carried food to a couple in thecorner.

“Alright.” Ruri led them to a table by the window. It overlooked the courtyard and they could see more students and guest pouring in.

Even as they sat down Ruri never let go of Yuto’s hand. Shelaid their joined hands on the table and ran her thumb over his knuckles. Shewas staring out the window and most likely not even aware of what her hand wasdoing.

Yuto gave her a lopsided grin and gently moved his hand awayas the Cutie Honey cosplayer came over and handed them menus. Ruri frowned alittle at the sudden lack of warmth in her hand but smiled as she read themenu.

“They have Karumeyaki!” she squeaked.

“…And pancakes…” Yuto mumbled as he resisted Yuya’s urge todrool.

“Sorry… I just reallylike Moms pancakes…” Yuya apologized. Once everyone’s memories hadreturned, Yuya had developed a strange obsession with his Mother’s pancakes.Yuto assumed it was because of how much he had missed her during the war.

Yuto smiled fondly, letting his emotions tell Yuya heunderstood.

“Is that what you want?” He asked Ruri.

“Hm…” Ruri gave him a conflicted look. “I donno… The dessertI mentioned earlier is the Marshmallow Parfait but…” she sighed as she let herupper body collapsed dramatically onto the table. “Everything sounds good!”

“I’m sure one of theother booths or classrooms will have Karumeyaki.” Yuri stated. “… That is how these Festivals work, right?”

“Yeah, it’s notuncommon for one or two of the same thing to appear in different places.”Yuya confirmed.

“Yuri and Yuya suggest looking for karumeyaki at one of theother booths.”

Yuto said absentmindedly as he looked for something he mightlike. The Marshmallow Parfait sounded good but stupidly sweet. If they weregoing to get it and share it he was going to need something a bit bitter andthirst quenching to counteract the overwhelming sweetness.

“They did?” Ruri blinked. She looked at Yuto, studyinghis(Yuya’s) face before returning to the menu. Yuto ignored her gaze, knowingshe was still getting used to the unique situation the eight of them were in.

“Did you make up your mind?” He asked.

“More or less…” She hesitantly replied.

“I sense a hidden ‘But’ in there.” He gave her a small,amused smile.

“But…” she continued, “It’s…well…” she hesitated again.

“It’s hard to make a choice when you have three other voicesin your head?”

“…” Ruri sighed. “Yes… we don’t mean to but we can’t seem tokeep our thoughts to ourselves… they keep… leaking.” She frowned sadly. Yutoreached over and took her hand back into his.

“Don’t worry…” He said softly. “All of you will get the hangof this… it wasn’t easy for us ether.”

“But you adjusted so quickly…” she gripped his fingers infrustration. “why is it taking us so long?”

“Yuya and I have been like this for weeks…” he felt a twangof guilt from Yugo but ignored it. “That’s why we adjusted quicker but thatdoesn’t mean we have it down.”

“You don’t?” Ruri looked a bit surprised.

“We don’t.” He confirmed. He made sure his voice was low, to avoidunwanted eavesdroppers, and continued. “We can keep our thoughts from theothers but not our emotions and there are times when we get so emotional we inadvertentlytake control of Yuya’s body.”

“…Really?”

“Yes, really.” Yuto thought a moment, before continuing. “Yokowas angry at Yuri, why I won’t say, but they weren’t getting along. Yoko wastalking to Yusho-san and said something that upset Yuri and without realizingor meaning to, he took control of Yuya and began yelling at her.” He felt theother three flinch at the memory and did his best to keep a calm face.

“Yuri… actually got upset?” Ruri looked at Yuto in disbelief.

“Yes. He did.” Yuto held back a shudder. “A few days ago,Yugo became so happy about something, he took control of Yuya. The change wasso sudden, we skated right into a tree…” this time he allowed himself toflinch.

“Oh…” Ruri flinched as well.

“We’re still getting the hang of this… we just had a headstart.” He smiled sadly.

“Any tips?” She asked hopefully.

“Unfortunately, the only advise I can give is to practicetalking to each other. The more you ‘Talk’ to each other the less you hear theother’s thoughts.” He gave her a small but sad smile.

“Okay…” Ruri looked down at their entwined hands, before theyheard the sound of footsteps headed their way.

“Sorry for the wait,” The Cutie Honey waitress apologized,“But are you ready to order?” She asked.

“Yes, I am.” Yuto said as he let go off Ruri hand and pickedthe menu back up. “What about you, Ruri?”

“Oh! Yes, I am!” she fumbled with the menu before findingwhat it was she wanted. “We’ll have the Marshmallow Parfait and I’ll have a cupof Melon soda.” She smiled.

“Alright…” The waitress jotted down Ruri’s order beforeturning to Yuto. “And you?

“I’ll have a cup of green tea…” Yuto sighed.

“Normal or Dark?” she asked, recognizing the look of someoneresigned to their ‘sweet’ fate.

“Dark.” He handed the menu back to her, as did Ruri.

“Understood.” She nodded solemnly, then smiled. “I’ll beright back with your drinks.

___

~OmEki ThEaTeR~ RuRi’S sIdE

Ruri looked down at their entwined hands. Yuya’s hands werecallused and rough but warm. They were a testament to his dedication to Entertainmentdueling. They spoke of his acrobatic training and the trials and errors he hadfaced.

They were so similar yet so different from Yuto’s… Her Yuto’shands were softer and had less calluses. He dueled for personal fun and, whilehe enjoyed competing, he didn’t have the zeal to become a professional thatYuya did…

So similar… yet so different…

Even her ‘own’ hands where different… Yuzu’s hands weresimilar too Yuya’s. they were covered in calluses and little scars from daysand hours of training… Ruri’s hands had been similar, but softer. They were notyet as calluses and rough as her counterparts… but… she supposed none of thatmattered now…

Yuzu’s hands were Ruri’s and Yuya’s were Yuto’s.

#arc v #yugioh arc v #yuya sakaki #yuto (arc v) #white day fest #My Arc V fanfics #my fanfic

[marginalgloss]

the ship of time

The mid to late 90s were a uniquely productive time for video games. Sega and Nintendo were still heavy hitters in the console space, with Sony’s first console being the fresh face at the party. PC games had come into their own, with the development of dedicated video cards and software drivers. CD-ROM was still a fairly novel standard, though it had been refined somewhat since aberrations like the Mega CD and the Philips CD-i. But with this shift in technology came a change in expectations as to who video games were for.

The latest machines weren’t just toys for kids: they were serious multimedia entertainment systems for grown-ups. But if video games were supposed to be for adults now, you wouldn’t have necessarily known it from their content. Titles with mature themes were widely available, if by ‘mature’ we mean gratuitous violence and sexualised imagery. Adolescent boys and young men were still the true target market. Something like Phantasmagoria was about as serious as the medium got: an interactive horror movie spread across seven CDs, it was astonishingly graphic, even by today’s standards.

This is not to say that games with serious ideas and themes did not exist; they just weren’t always packaged in this way. The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time is a game that might not feature on everybody’s list of games with mature intent. The N64 had its fair share of games rated for older audiences — from the celebrated adaptation of Goldeneye to Conker’s Bad Fur Day — but in this case, the facade of the gentle, family-friendly Zelda franchise concealed something quite radical. It wasn’t only that this game could be sinister, even frightening; it had a thematic ambition that asked the player to not only do as they were told, but to consider their own personal role in a story.

As usual for these games, the player controls Link, a little guy in a green suit who moves around a big open world, fighting monsters, solving puzzles, and discovering secret wonders. But better to say they become Link, since as with all the Zelda games, the intention is that the kid in the green suit serves as the direct avatar of the player’s presence in the world. The first thing the player does on starting the game is to rename him - as yourself, perhaps - and in doing so, the game is always talking to you, the player, not to him.

Link’s child-like status is emphasised here as never before. He seems tiny. His stubby little legs are barely longer than his body. His shouts in combat are in the voice of a boy. He can’t even carry his metal shield once you first discover it: he can only protect himself by curling up in a ball with the thing on his back, like a turtle. One of my favourite moments comes in an early dungeon, where you encounter a set of stairs that seem large enough for a giant — they must be climbed up slowly, one at a time.

And then you find the Master Sword, the item which — in the previous Zelda games at least — signalled a permanent transition to maturity. This is supposed to be the point at which the games really begin. But here, on touching it, something new happens: Link is transported many years into the future of his kingdom, and becomes an adult. He’s bigger now. He can handle all kinds of serious weapons. And something terrible has happened.

The city square that was once all smiling villagers has become a blasted wasteland. Houses are ruined. The only inhabitants have become zombies; if disturbed, they utter a terrifying scream that leaves Link helpless until they latch on to him to drain his health. 

The rest of the world fares no better. Some rapacious capitalist has taken over the local farm. A village is lost in drizzle and inertia. The lake lies drained. People appear to have lost their minds. 

As the world becomes worse, Link’s adult self soon proves inadequate. It becomes clear that some problems can only be solved by the child within him. To do that, the player must actually set aside the Master Sword again — temporarily surrendering some of that extra power previously attained — in order to go places that might otherwise be impossible. Only the young Link can find his way to the hidden hallways that lie under the well in the Kakariko Village.

There’s something nightmareish about that dungeon in particular. It isn’t only the literal implications of atrocity — the skulls, the tools of torture, the ghastly revenants that stalk the hidden rooms. It isn’t just the unsettling nature of the adversaries here, which grasp and claw at you with awful hands. And it’s not only the many false walls and floors, and the total lack of sound or animation that accompanies clipping through them. 

All of the above induces a feeling of uncanny, of wrongness, as though the game is showing you something you should not be seeing. But worse still is the realisation that the place below the well exists only in the world of the child Link, not in the future world. It’s not only the adult world is corrupted: the evil was here all along, buried out of sight, deep below the innocent version of Hyrule.

That the game asks the player to confront this in the persona of a child is significant. Partly it’s a trope of horror fiction: a protagonist, encountering something inexplicably haunting, is often reduced to a childlike state of frozen, appalled wonder. But to actually turn them back into a child is a more radical gesture, one which in this instance ends up combining separate notions of what it means to be young.

We come to this game with the expectation that video games are for children, and the game agrees; but it reminds us that also for children are the sense of adventure, exploration and wonder -- and so is the most profound, paralysing notion of fear most of us will ever experience. The inner child has something to show us that we might not want to see. Here, becoming a kid again is not just for the sake of carefree enjoyment: it’s to venture down the well, to confront some awful truth about the world, and perhaps about themselves.

What does it tell us about the world? That it’s a place filled with pointless traps — invisible, illogical, impossible to predict. Everything is rigged against the player by design. The only reward they can expect to find is a special lens, a tool that enables them see those previously invisible traps. An exact analogue for ageing, perhaps, or for spending too long playing video games. That’s how life works: you can never escape the dungeon, but perhaps you can learn to spot the bad parts before they hurt you. 

The above screenshots were taken directly from the 3DS edition of the game.

#gaming #the legend of zelda #ocarina of time #3ds #nintendo