#source: stuff felixa2728 and i said

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James baked as hell: So Niki... how you doin'?

Niki baked as hell: Sehr gur.

Niki: Gur.

Niki: Gurgurguuurrrr.

Niki: Ich bin eine Traube.

Niki: ICH BIN EINE TAUBE!!!

James: ???

#niki wanted to say: sehr gut #very good #but it always became gur #and pigeons do gurgurgurrr #aka that's actually just felix whoe can't type #source: stuff felixa2728 and i said #incorrect f1 quotes #f1 #formula 1 #classic f1 #james hunt #niki lauda #james and niki are both high AS FUCK on weed

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Niki: *reading from the education act *

James: We should emigrate to iceland.

Niki quoting: „Object the ideology of the national socialistic party“

James: I'm barely human four days a week.

Niki: What language do they speak in iceland?

James, thinking out loud: English?

Niki: *still quoting * „design in harmony with nature and the environment“... they don't speak english everywhere, James

Niki, thinking out loud: Those laws sound stupid... I could probably write better laws... I could write better jokes... maybe I should become a comedian.

James: Are you even listening to me?

Niki: *looks up from the education act for the first time during this conversation *

Niki: You said the people of iceland aren’t really human but do speak english.

James: No... but we need a vacation.

Niki: *nods and points at a half asleep René who just started gnawing on the education act he barely even layed down on the table *

#launt and the kids #niki lauda #james hunt #rene arnoux #launt #rathunt #incorrect f1 quotes #f1 #formula 1 #classic f1 #source: stuff felixa2728 and I said #and would those evil evil parents please feed their cake goblin #he needs nutrients #which are not found in paper #he needs good and whole cupcakes #feed your cake goblin

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Doing homework with launt and the 13, including but not limited to:

Didier: Dad, can you sit Ayrton and Nelson appart.

Niki, helping Andrea with his reading: Why?

Didier: *points at a screaming Ayrton and Nelson holding scissors *

Niki, grabs the scissors: What the hell are you doing!?

Ayrton, bawling: He wants to stab me😭

Nelson: You stole my ruler😠

Ayrton: You pinched me😢

Niki: And that's the reason you wanna stab each other.

Ayrton: I didn't try to stab him. He took my scissors😭

Niki, done with their shit: Cut it out and behave yourselves. Where is Alain?

Jacques, apropos of nothing: He's been outside for half an hour now.

Gilles: We threw him out the window.

Niki: 😱

Niki runs to the open window and looks out into the garden, where he sees Alain painting some swirls into the sandbox with a stick.

Alain, noticing Niki: Look dad. Pretty art😇

Meanwhile:

René: *bawling his eyes out, in absolute hysterics *

James: *tearing at his hair, in absolute hysterics *

James: wHaT's 9 + 10?!!!

René crying: 21?

James howls: No.

James tries explaining the problem using skittles but Nigel eats all the red ones🤦‍♂️

Then you got the boys testing each other on their latin vocab but that doesn't work out to well as a) either the boys in question didn't learn and are obviously guessing or b) won't stop laughing and yelling "biggus dickus".

Niki trying to explain genetics turns into everybody, including James, being thoroughly confused and Bruno having the epiphany that James and Niki aren't his bio parents and breaking down crying, asking who his "step mother" is then, causing even more confusion.

#incorrect f1 quotes #f1 #classic f1 #retro f1 #launt and the kids #niki lauda #james hunt #alain prost #nelson piquet #ayrton senna #didier pironi #jacques laffitte #gilles villeneuve #rene arnoux #nigel mansell #andrea de cesaris #bruno giacomelli #source: stuff felixa2728 and i said #felix had a great idea #and we just went from there

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Nelson: Who's having another baby?

Nelson: Dad!?

Nelson, shakes head: Uh uh.

Nelson: You said you were done.

Alain excited: We're gonna get another baby! We're gonna get another baby!

Nelson gets up and stomps off: What is wrong with you people!?

#incorrect f1 quotes #f1 #formula 1 #classic f1 #nelson piquet #alain prost #launt #niki lauda #james hunt #launt and the kids #source: stuff felixa2728 and I said #and great thanks to tik tok #source: tik tok #how different children react to being told james and niki are gonna adopt another kid #and that kids would be ayrton

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Alain: Hey, you wanna watch twilight with me?

Nelson: I don't wanna have sex right now.

Alain: ????

Nelson: What is that?

Nelson: *takes Alain's notepad.*

The notes say:

Ask Nelson if he wants to watch twilight, buy pasta, top or bottom *scratched out stuff*

Nelson smirks: Top or bottom eh?

Nelson: Well you'll get both😏

Alain: ?????

Alain: I JUST WANNA WATCH TWILIGHT😭

#this is almost word for what something thag happened to felixa2728 #incorrect f1 quotes #f1 #classic f1 #formula 1 #alain prost #nelson piquet #proquet #source: stuff felixa2728 and i said

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Ayrton: Where are you going??

Elio misspeaks: I'm going to christmas.

Ayrton: 😂That's an actual place😂 Didn't know that😂 Where exactly is that😂

Elio: * kill bill sirens*

#incorrect f1 quotes #f1 #classic f1 #formula 1 #elio de angelis #ayrton senna #elio being bitchy to ayrton my beloved #source: stuff felixa2728 and i said

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Ayrton: *waking up in the morning*

Gerhard looking at him with puppy dog eyes.

Gerhard: Pizza for breakfast?

#incorrect f1 quotes #f1 #formula 1 #classic f1 #ayrton senna #gerhard berger #bersenna #source: stuff felixa2728 and i said

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Ayrton comes into the garage, sees René sitting next to his car in tears.

Ayrton calls out to Alain: Ey Alain, I think the cake goblin is having another episode.

Alain: Come on Ayrton, I told you not to call René that

Alain to René: What happened?

René stammers: I have ... *shows Alain a cup with a lump of dough-colored something * ... It said ...

Alain:

Ayrton:

Nigel comes into the garage: Ayrton did you take that bag I left by the---

Nigel sees René and the bag behind him on the counter

Nigel: René that was for my dog!

René: iT sAiD cAkE!

#incorrect f1 quotes #f1 #classic f1 #formula 1 #ayrton senna #alain prost #rené arnoux #nigel mansell #source: stuff felixa2728 and i said

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René: Whoa, you got cake... May I have a piece?

Riccardo: But... it's my birthday cake?

René: Pleaseeeee... You know I love birthday cakes.

Nelson comes into the brabham box: Yeah, but why?

René sits up straight and puts on a gloomy face: It was many, many years ago when I was five years old. My grandma baked me a cake like every year, but when we drove home that day she died of a heart attack.

Riccardo pityingly gives him a piece and René gobbles it up in one bite.

René: Lol, did you believe that? Cake was delicious though! *runs away* A few months later, it's Nigel's birthday.

René: May I have a piece?

Nigel: Um... okay?...

Elio grabs Nigels hand: No stop. *looks at René * You really gotta tell us what it is about birthday cakes for you.

René: Birthday cakes always remind me of the love that other people get... And since my wife threw me out... *sniffs *

The event repeats itself: *René gets cake, declares the story false and runs away * A few months later. Again.

Nelson: Okay, you know what? We gotta figure this out. Everyone, work your brains. What is it about René and birthday cakes.

Keke: Definitely a fetish!

Elio: Has anyone actually seen him eat anything other than cake?

Jacques shakes his head.

Gilles pats Jochen and they both jump to their feet.

Nigel: What if his stories are true?

Everyone thinks about that briefly.

Everyone snorting: NO!

#incorrect f1 quotes #f1 #formula1 #formula 1 #classicf1 #classic f1 #rene arnoux #riccardo patrese #nelson piquet #elio de angelis #nigel mansel #keke rosberg #jacques laffite #gilles villeneuve #source: stuff felixa2728 and I said #and the quest continues #why does Renè love cake so much #what is it about birthday cake

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Patrick joins Jochen and Gilles. Patrick points at Niki, who's talking to Alain.

Patrick: Look at this guys. It's a mèremonster in captivity. We're observing  this one in course of an experiment. The mèremonster was seperated from its young so we gave it this runt, which had been rejected by its mother.

Jochen: Seems like the mèremonster's accepting its new cup.

Gilles: Not cup... it's a struppelnit!

Niki suddenly looks at the three: What the hell is this new jackassery?

Jochen gasps: We have been spotted.

Patrick grabbing Gilles: Quick, the mèremonster is extremely protective of its young and highly territorial.

Patrick, Gilles and Jochen run off.

Alain: What the hell are they doing?

Niki: Don't know, don't care. So, where is that yoghurt?  

#apparently mèremonster means something like mother monster #felixa2728 blew it out of the water today #incorrect f1 quotes #f1 #formula 1 #formula1 #classic f1 #classicf1 #jochen mass #gilles villeneuve #patrick tambay #niki lauda #alain prost #source: stuff felixa2728 and I said #the mèremonster only eats yoghurt #struppelnit means something like tousled nest #cause of alain's hair #launt and the kids

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Police control.

Police officer: License and registration please.

Niki: *already completely annoyed by the sotuation but reaching for his license *

James from the back seat.

James: What do you mean license?? I already gave you that two months ago and never got it nack.

James: Did you guys loose my license?🤨

Niki: 🤦‍♂️

#incorrect f1 quotes #f1 #formula 1 #classic f1 #niki lauda #james hunt #launt #rathunt #james hunt x niki lauda #source: stuff felixa2728 and i said

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Jochen: Look at that, a beautiful specimen of the 'giant gremlin'. *tackles Nelson and puts him in a headlock *

Nelson thrashig: What the fuck Jochen.

Jochen, fake australian accent: Oh wow, this gremlin is really big. You really need to be carefull while handeling it or it will- *Nelson elbows him in the face *

#jochen is now steve irwin #it's not my fault #felixa2728 did it #okay maybe it was 50% her and 50% me #incorrect f1 quotes #f1 #formula 1 #formula1 #classicf1 #classic f1 #jochen mass #nelson piuquet #source: stuff felixa2728 and I said

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Jochen putting finger over his lips: Shh. We have to be quiet. This one is a member of the 'cake goblin' family foraging for food. Their staple diet mainly consists of cake, birthday cake to be specific. Though sometimes it will settle for cupcakes.

Gilles whispers: Let's see if we can get a better look at this specimen. What I do now should only be done by professionals.

Gilles cups hands over mouth like mikrophone.

Gilles yells: Ey René, I ate your birthday cake!

Jochen: Now we should hear the hunting cry of the cake goblin.

René hollers: You did WhaT!? GiLlEs gEt BacK HerE! I'm GoNnA KilL YoU!!!

#and gilles is steve irwin too #or that guy in animal docus with a french accent #incorrect f1 quotes #f1 #formual1 #formula 1 #classicf1 #classic f1 #jochen mass #gilles villeneuve #rene arnoux #rene being a cake coblin #I love this expression #source: stuff felixa2728 and I said

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René: Holy shit, I drank so fucking much I'm seeing doubles. *waves at Mario * Hey Mario, *waves at Mario's twin brother * Hey Mario.

Ronnie: That's his twin brother.

René snorts: Yeah sure.

Niki: No really.

René: Suuuure. I'm gonna kiss the left Mario and then the right Mario.

Ronnie: Don't you dare!

Mario holds him back: Wait no, let him. He's gonna kiss me scond and-

René, after kissing Mario's brother: Wait a second... You actually have a twin brother!?

#incorrect f1 quotes #f1 #formula1 #formula 1 #classicf1 #classic f1 #rene arnoux #mario andretti #aldo andretti #ronnie peterson #niki lauda #source: stuff felixa2728 and I said #feat: #rene being way too drunk #mario's poor twin brother #ronnie being protective #mario being a little shit