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hairasuntouchedaspartoftheamazon · 3 years

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Hear me out ----> SPN/Gravity Falls AU

A while back I saw a post(that i cannot find again, much to my chagrin) that listed a bunch of things Grunkle Stan did that have extreme Dean energy (this includes a brief but sincere attempt to make Jurassic Park real) and now a Gravity Falls AU lives in my head featuring:

Dean as Stan, who left home when he was twenty-one after a massive fight with his parents and Sam over Sam’s college shit and was a drifter for seven years until Sam called him and said he needed help in this podunk town in Oregon

Sam as Ford, who did manage to get out and go to college, met Kevin(as McGucket), and proceeded to do some real shady work with eldritch beings that resulted in both of them proceeding to get visions of some messed up shit, which causes Kevin to quit the project, leaving Sam to call Dean to Gravity Falls....we all know what happens next, Sam falls through an inter-dimensional portal and Dean is like “Okay I live here now, gotta figure out how to get Sam back”. Problem is, he only has one journal and needs two more. Where could they possibly be?

Flash-forward about twelve years; cult survivors, podcast hosts, and sorta-siblings Anna and Cas are driving up to Oregon to look at the weird shit present in Gravity Falls/The Mystery Shack and their shitty car breaks down. Cas staying to supervise the car while Anna goes and scopes out some potential material has nothing to do with the hot tourist trap guy who happens to be a mechanic, it doesn’t Anna.

Cue the pilot incident where Anna almost becomes Queen of the Gnomes and Cas gets to drive a golf cart and gnomes are defeated with leaf blowers. Car’s still broken and there is obviously a lot of weird shit going on here so why not hang out for the summer?

More below the cut, including recurring characters and some plot lines

Featuring such recurring characters as:

-Cassie Robinson my beloved, small town writer who desperately wants to break into the big time. Writes a combination of political and social critiques and the standard local stuff. We get introduced to her in the second episode, where Anna and Cas discover that she built the Gobblewonker in attempt for publicity so that someone will read the Gravity Falls Tooter(yes i just made up the name of the town’s newspaper) She regularly appears when Anna and Cas are researching local history or when a robot comes to threaten the Shack because Dean owes her money again.

-Claire, Kaia, Alex, and Patience as the resident teenage nuisances who nominally work at the Shack but actually mostly cause a lot of problems for the local-definitely gay-sheriffs. Claire and Cas are almost definitely related but they don’t know this at first, a minor plot point near the end of season one is figuring out that they are in fact related and the shocking realization that Claire likes Anna better. Anna is pretty good friends with all of them and Cas is minorly terrified, as you should be with teenage girls who live in the woods and absolutely know how to throw knives. Alex being a pyschic is a major plot point of season two especially after they become friends with Kevin and realize that hey, the shit of twelve years ago is happening again except it’s spreading to people who aren’t even involved this time.

-For that matter, collection of pyschics Missouri, Pamela, Alex, and Kevin who regularly find out weird pieces of information that sometimes become plot relevant and sometimes do not at all.

-Jody and Donna who also only do their job nominally because ACAB and mostly just maintain trails and shit around town cause they used to be park rangers but being sheriffs pays more and also they can make sure no one gets arrested for stupid shit. They regularly show up in like the weirdest places which Donna always defends as ‘we’re on a date’. No one questions this.

-Victor Henrikson as the investigating FBI agent in season two who is just like “i don’t know what the fuck is going on here but I KNOW it’s sketchy what is wrong with this town” because yes there is a witch here her name is Rowena and yeah she brews potions and stuff during the full moon no one sees anything wrong with this at all except Henrikson who was prepared to arrest a nutty drifter building a doomsday device but not prepared to deal with a whole town of people who absolutely believe in ghosts. His partner is Billie, who, like in the show, doesn’t think that some people should get to break rules whenever the fuck they want and is thus absolutely ready to rain justice down on this crazy white boy who think’s he’s gonna end the world. I kinda love her perspective cause it’s like, okay just because someone is the protagonist of the story doesn’t mean they’re special.

-Charlie and Ash as the only people in town who get wifi on a regular basis and thus show up when there’s some kind of need for tech or phone calls. Running gag that nothing works tech wise unless one of them is in the vicinity, with the exception of TVs. There is also absolutely the episode where they play a game of D&D in real life and Charlie has never been happier but Dean and Ash absolutely rig it because they suck.

-Bela Talbot in the role of Pacifica Northwest cause she’s a bitch and I LOVE HER SO MUCH.

-Kelly Kline my beloved, who’s the liason for the local Yakama tribe(cause I read a headcanon that she’s Native and that lives in my head rent free baby) who regularly reminds people that certain things are not for you to touch, there’s got to be respect there. This theme stays pretty constant throughout the show cause while after awhile Cas kinda forgets about the podcast he’s supposed to be co-hosting, Anna is still on top of things and trying to collect stories so she and Kelly butt heads a lot while Cas and Jack(who’s like eight) discuss frogs and bees in great detail.

-The Banes twins who comprise the other half of the witch activity in this town and who are very very nice but you do not want to fuck with them whatsoever. They show up extremely often and always give very strange but specific excuses to why they are certain places such as “checking the frequencies of the energy in this location” and that’s a running gag for awhile until it turns out in season 2 that they’ve been aware of the machine Dean’s rebuilding for awhile now and they’re working on protective measures to keep everyone safe no matter what comes out of it this time.

(Also, to compensate for the fact that Sam and Dean are not twins and thus someone would probably realize that there is a different dude living in the weird house in the woods, the Banes go a little Society of the Blind Eye and modified people’s memories. Because they want Dean to get the portal right and then shut it down permanently once things are the way they’re supposed to be again)

-Benny who is absolutely still a vampire, he runs the diner. The vampirism is a well-established fact and no one questions it, in fact Anna finds it hot.

Plot Lines of Season One Include:

-Bela Talbot whom I love attempting to buy/steal/destroy the Shack because she knows there’s some funky machinery down there and a lot of weird artifacts that she could make another fortune selling, yes she summons demons so that she can figure out where the deed to the place is, yes Anna gets to punch her in the face at one point because “These are my friends, you bitch!”

-Cas trying to decipher some of the stuff in Sam’s journals and figure out who the hell wrote them. This involves him thoroughly annoying basically everyone in town except Kelly because they are weird best friends who absolutely have long conversations about the difference between local mythologies and urban legends.

-Anna sincerely making friends for like the first time in her life and deeply enjoying being a kind of weird aunt to the local girl gang and the person who brings Rowena gossip and does have a weird love/hate relationship with Bela going. Like, I mentioned in the beginning that Anna and Cas are cult survivors, their social weirdness and then re-joining the world is absolutely discussed. Are they choosing some of the weirdest people ever to base their social knowledge on? Yes. They don’t care.

-Subplot of Dean genuinely trying to get Cas to go out with him but Cas does not realize this whatsoever so they’re just both awkward as fuck. Running gag of Dean walking up to Cas all smooth and trying to ask him out but Cas just...does not get slang and thinks Netflix and chill really does mean Netflix and chill. They end up watching Wynonna Earp.

#spn gravity falls au #cazi writes #spn #gravity falls #this has lived in my head for five days let me rest #but this is excellent no?#I love it but that may be because i have extremely niche crossover ideas

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idontneedasymbol · 6 years

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Sympathy for the devil?

I doubt I’m the first to observe this, but...having just watched FOX’s Lucifer, I am becoming convinced that one of the (many) problems with SPN in the last couple seasons is that some of the writers would really rather be writing that Lucifer instead. Which, on the one hand -- I can’t blame them; Lucifer seems like a blast to write. But it is so, so wrong for SPN.

We know the SPN writers watch Lucifer -- in SPN, Lucifer’s line from 11x10 about moving to LA to solve crimes was a reference right when the show began. And Lucifer likewise has had nods to SPN. The overlap only makes sense; the shows both deal with a lot of the same religious mythology.

But many traits of SPN’s later-season Lucifer -- the fluctuating power levels and physical vulnerability, the desperate need for validation from his father God (even more than his conflict with Michael), the heightened sex drive, the whining -- are all more representative of the Lucifer of the titular show. (As is the idea of Lucifer having a “true face” that terrifies people on a primal level -- I can’t remember if that had come up on SPN before, but it’s a major aspect of Lucifer’s Lucifer.)

The problem is that this doesn’t work. SPN’s Lucifer is first and foremost a bad guy -- the bad guy, for much of the show -- while Lucifer’s Lucifer is the protagonist. He oscillates between assholish hero and textbook antihero, but he’s never the villain. The Lucifer show is, largely, lightweight supernatural procedural fun, and while it’s got its fair share of problematic and regressive elements, the characters don’t deal with the level of moral conflict that’s in SPN. Lucifer’s Lucifer doesn’t possess a vessel; as far as we know, his body is his own (in fact its violation by God is an ongoing theme). (There are possible consent issues with his supernatural sex appeal, especially in s1, but the show stays vague on that point and wisely phases it out in later seasons.) He’s never wanted or tried to destroy or rule the world, and he has no particular grudge against humanity; his anger is with his divine family. He works with and befriends humans, some of whom he also ends up in conflict with and has hurt, but more by being a narcissistic jerk than by years or centuries of deliberate physical and mental torture.

Without that backstory, the character’s rough road to redemption is far less steep and more generally (ymmv) sympathetic, and his dickish acting out is more funny than not; he’s way more akin to Crowley (mother issues and all). Trying such an arc with SPN’s Lucifer, with his wholly different backstory and relationship with the show’s protagonists, is a lot more disturbing and off-putting in ways the SPN writers don’t seem to be aware of, or not enough to compensate for. Lucifer’s Lucifer loves playing the bad boy but fears being a monster, and a lot of the tension of the show is exploring whether that’s what or all he is, and whether he can grow beyond it -- which he’s actively trying to do, more often than not. While SPN’s Lucifer has proven himself to be the monster of all monsters time and again, and playing him like he’s just a bad boy, expecting sympathy for him because his circumstances have changed even though he hasn’t, causes massive cognitive dissonance.

Interestingly enough, both Lucifers probably share a common ancestor, and closer than Milton. The Lucifer TV show is loosely based on the DC comics character Lucifer Morningstar, originating in Neil Gaiman’s The Sandman. And The Sandman, along with other Gaiman works, is a major influence on SPN (Kripke once described SPN as “Sandman meets American Gods”) and SPN’s Lucifer probably owes quite a bit to the comic version. (In fact, Pellegrino looks more like the blond comics character than the Lucifer TV show’s star.) But both TV versions of the character have diverged so much, in different directions, that calling on one to write the other is almost worse than if they had no connection.

(The one thing the Lucifer show has done is reassured me that my extreme antipathy to Pellegrino’s Lucifer is restricted to just that version, and not the archetypal character, who has always been one of my mythological favorites. I was a little worried SPN had spoiled the Lightbringer for me, but as it turns out, no fears on that front...though now when I see “Lucifer” the switch from fannish D: to :D depending on the show in question is a bit whiplash-inducing...)

#lucifer #my post #meta #my meta #wank for ts #or at least negativity about the ep/season #really i wish Bucklemming would just go write for the Lucifer show #like okay I wouldn't wish them on any show really #and I’m sure they’d still screw it up #but less obviously #there's less to screw up #plus #the snarky comedy and casual sex is way more in their wheelhouse

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