#struggled a littl and also thought i wouldnt get anything out in time but im happy with this regardless!!! i like how tommy came out

[teethkid67]

lunch break :P

bp!tubbo and tommy sharing some rations in pogtopia for @sixteenth-day-event prompt "kindness" :3 i think about bptubbo risking his stupid skin to feed his loser bestie&co often

#sixteenthdayevent #things i make #dsmp #dream smp fanart #tommyinnit #tubbo #clingyduo #clingyduo fanart #pogtopia clingyduo are so special to me anyways so. ya #struggled a littl and also thought i wouldnt get anything out in time but im happy with this regardless!!! i like how tommy came out #better than tubbo but w/e :3 #bptechno bringing them literal military rations vs bptubbo bringing them leftovers in tupperwares and tinfoil . idk they are special #block party #how did i forget the block party tag .

[chiiyuuvv]

• PAIRING — bestfriend!xikers x gn reader (i think)

• GENRE — "imagine if we were dating" prompt, shy, fluff, angst in minjaes, screaming at hunters, yeah

• WORD COUNT — 880

• AUTHOR'S NOTE — i got this idea when i was reading some skz texts. Basically, you were saying "what if we were dating" but you already dating- wait lemme just

• TAGLIST — @lil-elle @hyunukitty

MASTERLIST! – JOIN THE TAGLIST!

MINJAE ☆

Doesnt find your joke funny

Theres a very clear line of best friends and lovers and besides, theres no possible way you could like him back

Zoning out a lot, trying to understand his feelings more when he just blurts out what was on his mind. Because you guys are close, he could tell you anything, right?

“No, no its fine. I know you obviously dont like me and it’s okay, i just wanted to get it off my chest. Im sorry i made you uncomfortable.”

He was already on the verge of tears, but when you tell him you love him, more than just friends, he just bursts out crying ♡

JUNMIN ☆

Just goes along with it

Holds your hand, puts his arm around your shoulder. Refuses to call you by your name but babe

Likes that your getting flustered because hes screaming on the inside

Gets so into his role that he leans into you, your noses touching and hes about to kiss you. Until wait a minute and just pulls back with a sheepish smile

Daydreams for the rest of the day about the almost kiss. And when he drops you to your house, he finally does it ♡

SUMIN

Freezes; were you reading his thoughts? Were you able to somehow see his dreams? H-how did you know??

He tries to play it cool even though his face is burning red. "Y-yeah.. that'll be crazy right?! Haha.." he clears his throat

But to his dismay, you already knew about the massive crush he had on you, as he was very obvious

So you use that to your advantage, scooting extra close to him, your hands shadowing over his small ones

"I like you too, stupid." You would laugh, placing a soft kiss on his cheek as his face gets even redder ♡

JINSIK ☆

"Yeah, imagine if we were dating." He would take it as a joke, lying down and fantasizing about your lifes as a couple

"I would take you to this hot air balloon festival, since i know you've always wanted to go."

Has this smile on his face until he stops; were you actually serious?

You had to be joking, there was no way this was directed to him, right?

Almost stops breathing and his mouth is dropped open when you kiss his cheek. "I like you, jinsik." ♡

HYUNWOO ☆

Your question honestly made him sad

Because wdym “what if you were dating?” no, he didnt want to pretend. He wanted to live his dreams, he wanted to be with you

So he gets a little quiet, looking down as hes lost in his thoughts, a little teary eyed

Snaps out of it when you call his name, and would say he’s okay even though you know he’s lying

So with all courage, you confess to him. And when you’re done, he’d pour his heart out to you ♡

JUNGHOON ☆

He’s completely taken aback, the silence making you feel a little uneasy

“B-but i mean.” wouldnt even let you talk without pressing his lips against yours, his face completely red but he doesnt care

Would kiss you again if you tried to talk, getting to the point where hes just peppering your face with kisses

Would have the whole rant about how much he loves you

Then it would be your turn to cut him off with a kiss ♡

SEEUN ☆

Also freezes; the first time hes speechless

Theres a long awkward silence, your faces red and seeun twiddling with his thumbs

"I mean I- well we- or m-maybe-" struggles to find words

"We can definitely start it slow.. i-i mean, it you wanna, i can understand if you dont b-but you decide haha!!!"

After you agree that you wanna take it slow, he would have this shy smile on his face, holding both of your hands, looking down the entire time ♡

YUJUN ☆

Would have the cutest smile on his face

“Dating??” the giggles he would let out, gosh

Like jinsik, he would fantasize about how everything would go, his ears red

But that turns into convincing you to go on a date with him. He’d treat you so well, buying anything you want

“I mean.. I wouldnt mind. I already love you and i know you do too, so why not we just make it offical?” ♡

HUNTER ☆

"If we were dating?" He would stop as you were walking through the park

Has this cheeky smile on his face. "I think i would do this."

Grabs both of your hands with a warm smile, checking to see if you were comfortable before tucking some hair behind your ears, his eyes filled with love

"You're so pretty." He would mumble as he picks a flower out of a bush next to you

Lifts up your chin and slowly connects your lips, moving in a slow but meaningful pace ♡

YECHAN ☆

The boy would not stop giggling

"I-if we were dating?" He would burst out laughing, making you think he's making fun of the question

Would stop laughing when he notices your frown

"I-I mean.. if we were dating, it would be so nice and we would wake up together and text pick-up lines and-" his face was bright pink as he was rambling

Stops when he notices, "i-i'd think i like it.." ♡

#xikers #xikers fluff #kpop #xikers drabbles #xikers imagines #xikers fanfic #xikers fanfiction #xikers au #xikersau #xikers headcanons #minjae xikers #xikers minjae #junmin xikers #xikers junmin #sumin xikers #xikers sumin #xikers jinsik #jinsik xikers #xikers hyunwoo #hyunwoo xikers #xikers junghoon #junghoon xikers #seeun xikers #xikers seeun #yujun xikers #xikers yujun #hunter xikers #xikers hunter #yechan xikers #xikers yechan

[kekisu]

a very popular headcanon people have (i Think its popular. at least a lot of my twitter mutuals agreed with me a while back) is that joker comes from inaba, and if youve played p4 you know that theres literally nothing to do there

so a big headcanon that i used to be obsessed with is that he would spend a lot of his days skateboarding or biking around listening to music and exploring old dirt roads.. and he ended up getting a special interest in bugs and reptiles because hed come across so many during his little solo adventures. hes also very well versed in fishing its not a fixation or anything but just something hes pretty good at

this is why i tend to draw joker like some sort of skater boy. i think hes always stood out a lot in this small town even before the false assault charge, like he wasnt disliked or bullied but he just didnt really fit in. and this didnt bother him. i think he only realized how boring his life was when he became a phantom thief and got all these new friends in this new big city that understood him despite the circumstances that led him here. like man i really used to live like that and see nothing wrong with it? i didnt yearn for more?

it makes it even more painful when he has to leave and they naturally drift apart. because they all have dreams and ambitions, and the best years of their lives are waiting for them around the corner. but joker is back in this small town where theres nothing to do but hang out in some food court or poke around in the woods. i imagine this newfound loneliness is really hard on him, not to mention the guilt for feeling like hes somehow to blame for. well, whatever happened with goro

to me personally i think goro lived. i think he mustered up the perseverance to bite and claw his way out of shidos palace after seeing that even someone like him has a chance at being loved, he just didnt really remember this in marukis reality because it was all a blur. so both goro and joker were completely clueless as to what his fate would be if they went back to their true reality, which is what was so scary. the uncertainty. he could very well be dead but how could they know for sure? i just dont like the thought of him dying before he could truly live, even though i understand the tragedy of it can be poetic, i just cant stand for him going out like that because i relate a lot to his struggles. and i think it would go against the overall positive message of p5r. sure not everybody gets to have a second chance or a happy ending, but. man. anyways

joker fully believes goro is dead though. he wouldnt be crazy to assume this considering how they parted ways in shidos palace. but it eats away at him and maybe he really does go crazy. maybe his life feels like its stuck in time and while his old friends are out chasing their dreams, hes stuck. broken and shattered over feeling like he couldve done something to save him, knowing jokers savior/martyr complex

im running out of steam and i didnt mean to ramble on about my post-p5r headcanons but, to wrap it up: goro is in rehab somewhere and has a service dog to help with his dissociation and mood swings. and a couple other stuff. he feels like if he walks back into jokers life itll mess something up like joker will just break down or something. so he keeps his distance until they cross paths again. im just very obsessed with the idea of goro getting his life together vs joker wanting so badly to chase that high of phantom thievery again but failing and being actually so depressed

man morgana must be exhausted

#persona 5 #idk might as well tag it? DFJHNJDMKSNDJ #I WANT PEOPLE TO SEE MY RAMBLE. #pleaseeeee tell me what you think i love to think about post p5r shuake <- literally running a zine about it

[bingobongobonko]

Hi Bingo! I just wanted to say that I've been lurking and looking at your art for your lancer campaign for a while now and I think it's so cool! You've kinda inspired me to check out the system for myself too! I hope it's not too much trouble/making you retread anything you've talked about before, but I'd be really interested to hear your thoughts on the system and how it's worked out for your campaign! I really love mecha stuff, but I think the genre can be pretty rife with militarism that I'm not super into. I get the sense though that you've been able to find a good way to slot these really cool characters into the setting and focus on their interactions while also getting the fun of that sweet sweet mech combat. My inquiry is very low stakes haha, so nw if you don't have time to gather all your thoughts (I know that if I was tasked to talk about my own campaigns my head would burst into flames just trying to sift through what I'd want to say :P) Anyway, just a little friendly wave to you to say your art is very inspirational, and keep up the great work!

OH WOW this is . whuhh. WOW! sorry im like. wtff. i mean i ramble about my characters a lot but i didn't think anyone else actually gave a fuck which is completely ok, i just WHUHH..!!! holy shit. excitement aside, i get where you're coming from. honestly i was never into the mecha genre, but lancer rpg really made me realize how cool it is! like im not a really technical guy, and i feel like lancer is VERY strategy-heavy in combat; unless you know what you're doing and what everything does, you can easily get overwhelmed with all the features and all the things to consider in the math. for me its a lot because i struggle with spatial understanding and any sort of mathematics. that's my only real gripe on the system, but that might also just be every other system as well. it's more of a personal issue than that of the system, my friends all picked it up super quick. as for the genre, yeah, i find militaristic shit a drag and mecha has the same feel to me. its got a layer of professionalism and seriousness i don't enjoy, nor wish to play along with, so i get what you mean yeah. thankfully my friend who dms the campaign is just. Holy fuck; she just has a huuuge extra care for character stories and weaving them into the narrative she explores. so really, its her i've to thank for making mecha stuff FUN for me. lancer can certainly run hand-in-hand with militaristic-focused rp, i was in a oneshot with that sole focus and while it was interesting, without that interesting narrative stuff you kind of lose steam, but ive grown so fond of dog days cuz of how my friend lets our characters develop AND helps them do that. that and the way she sets up the story, just. FUUUUCK. the military is an afterthought in what is a fight against time and para-causality sinking its teeth into what little sanity we have. we fight against something that is a victim and a perpetrator. we're the worst people to be tasked to be saving an entire planet too, but here we are. as cheesy as it is, it's all about who you play with. thats the feel i get about most systems. honestly why im so ehhh about playing with strangers, when i'd rather play with people i like. all systems strike me as more of a tool; its the way you use em yk? the experience you get from them are more reflective of who you're telling a story with (or fighting alongside, there's no right way to play. i just really like narrative storytelling). so really, ive to thank my friends, especially @spaginithethird who introduced me to lancer in the first place as a dm!!!!!!!!!! TO A LOT OF SYSTEMS ACTUALLY shes rlly knowledgeable abt this stuff and very very very sweet too o7 so yeah really, its a really fun system BUT to me, i wouldnt be playing lancer if i didn't have a narrative to go by and follow with people i like. i am always sayin this but its my favorite thing when it comes to ttrpgs

#THANK YOU FOR THE ASK BTW #im really happy ppl like lancer.. its a surprise 2 me #i usually just talk bullshit because i like talking about ocs #so its really aieee... #i havent been drawing a lot due to unending slumps so that really means a lot.. ty dude #sorry im bad at explainin shit i REALLY hope i make sense and hopefully youll like lancer too!!!!! #lancer rpg

[eyesxxyou]

Angst about dad hobie/spiderpunk so warning! But it becomes a slight fluff?

Hobie having a afab reader as their lover. The reader actually gets pregnant from yknow, and hobie doesnt want them doing an unsafe abortion since they mightve been illegal back then or still are, and he doesnt want reader being hurt. So they have a kid and hobie stays with them no matter how hard it is being spiderman and being scared of your family being killed.

This was years ago, he shouldve been more safe, he shouldve done more. That what he tells himself as hes at your and his 8 year old daughters grave. Having a heart locket necklace that he bought for you on his neck, having a ring that he had made for his daughter and would let her wear it on special occasions on the same necklace. And inside the necklace is a photo of you three a couple of days before he lost the both of you. He has patches and stuff from both of yall on his leather jacket. Or if your crafty and make stuff or made him a leather jacket it becomes his main leather jacket he wears as it was a gift from you. Or any pins or anything he purs it on the jacket. He knows you or her wouldnt want him to blame himself but he cant stop, so he protects other familys woth his whole life. He knows how hard it is losing the hellspawn you created or the person you fell in love with. He distracts himself all the time with work, music, riots. Work+music+riots all together. Destroying osborn. Destroying villains. He overworks himself not to feel the immense pain and guilt he feels. He almost had bled out a couple of times if not for captain anarchy. You would patch him up and he got used to you doing it, he stopped doing it to himself. And he stopped caring about himself and if it happened, he just wanted his world back. He used to care about himself, you and yalls daughter did as well. Youd comfort him and now your gone, he doesnt know how to do with his feelings or anything , so thats why he distracts himself or doesnt care what happens to him. But no matter what on yalls anniversary, your birthday, your daughters birthday, his, honestly no matter what he always went to visit your grave everyday. He felt closer to you and your daughter. He was a little closer then he thought as yall were right their with him whenever hed come to visit, or just watching over him. You were his guardian angels physically and liter. He doesnt know that yet, he will once you accidentally show yourself to him when hes bleeding out when no ones around and he hears your and your daughters blissful voice. But its not his day, not today. Not yet. You give him another kiss before making sure he doesnt bleed out and his daighter also gives him kiss and cuddles him while you fix where his wounds at. He doesnt believe its real until he wakes up in an alleyway with karl shaking him and his wound is wrapped like how youd wrap it. Hed just need to change it, karl would help him with that. He still felt your and your daughters presence, and that motivates him a lot more. He is able to get more done and he finally gives himself a break. Visiting yours and his daughters grave with flowers while he is working on a new song to help anyone struggling with something similar he went to. Bit he also lets himself go to the park and relieve yalls memories from when you were kids to teens to young adults, to where yall had yalls daughter as probably 18/19/20 year olds (i dont want teen pregn in this guys even though that exist. Thatd also be a little weird writing ahout this.) But anyways while he revisits the memories he knows you and your daughter are right with him, when are yall not? And now he knows how yall feel and yalls presence, so he now always knows yall are always with him

Im sorry this shit isnt profread so sorry for any errors in my spelling but i thought this was cute, i hope you enjoyed this. A little angst but its cute (i almost cried when writing this)

-🍄

SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP

#{eye's inbox} #{👁️ inbox} #🍄 anon

[v-anrouge]

ok!! aster ur rlly private thats y its a bit harder 2 get a read on u wit just online personas alone but bc of that i dunno if u know or even notice but ur some kind of idol or icon that a lot of ppl recognize u for. some ppl look at u for support or even maybe encouragement sometimes forgettinf the fact that ur not just some sort of model or super strong guy who can handle anything. you do have ur own insecurities and are struggling just as much as everyone.

just a guess, but maybe thats why u said u were a "jupiter kinnie" reblogging saturn's post bc it was about being put to the sidelines and watching everyone else shine but you. i was abit confused but i think i peiced it 2gether now. maybe, in relation to ur community here in tumblr, you feel a little left out. maybe its because ppl see your persona as strong and so so so confident that they think that you can never be 'left out' because you are THE star, you know? ironic to your posts about feeling like a stranger that your moots barely talk to, most moots i know actually get excited on the occasional times youre active. There r some who even get genuinely upset or overthink when u dont talk to them bc u dont initiate convo and they usually expect you to keep the connection instead bc they wouldnt wanna feel annoying or a bother to you. (which is not ur fault btw because you are a human being with his own time and his own life and know that you are not a mind reader so ppl shouldnt expect u to cater to their worries just bc ur idolized as this super confident encouraging persona and get less considered as an actual person who doesnt know everything n can also have their own moments)

Basically ppl admire you like an idol and find u so unreachable meanwhile u feel a lonely bc it feels like everyone is so great but you. Aster, youre the best guy ever and everyone likes you a lot. mayb this could also answer ur question on why some ppl r a little nervous wit giving u thoughts n asks. I could be wrong bc i dont rlly know you irl but this is just an outsiders deduction

Reminder that this is just what ive observed from tumblr and moot interactions as well as posts and also im eepy and i hope u have a good day today (its morning in brazil right?) im wishing you best of luck in ur day

(u can delete if this is too uncomfy for u or mayb jus want to only read it 4 yourself)

(i could also be super wrong in judgement since i dont know everything but :333 i did mt best)

oh my god ii donf even know what to say to this to be honest i mxomowlfley dumbfounded like i thought I was a mysterious guy.mp3 but i feel so read like this is what's actually happening do ppl genuinely see me as an idol o don't even know how to process this oh my god????

#this /pos btw #this is so mazinv

[fagcrisis]

alright so! im not gonna bother with a very organized post i wouldnt be me if i did but here are my collision thoughts!

i liked the theme song, which sets it apart from dynamite and rampage in that it isnt dogshit. i also liked the set and the presentation, although i wouldve loved if it was more distinct from dynamite (also i miss the tunnels) but overall they made a great job of adhering to the companys aesthetic while making a new distinct looking product. i also was hoping since its live on tnt that they would have different editors, this clearly isnt the case, editing was shit. not a collision issue aew just needs better editors.

i agree with everyone on this, commentary was a little rough. i didnt really know nigel before (i never have time for roh) so i didn't know what to expect and he and kevin obviously need time to figure out how theyre gonna work together, and kevin also clearly struggled with the american format (ad breaks, promos between matches etc). overall it is still better than dynamite commentary and i have high hopes for them! not even Hoarse Corpse Jr at the main could take them down to his level.

i'll admit i didn't fully watch punk's promo at the start, im a notorious promo skipper but i watched most of it, and it seemed alright to me. there was a bit of dissonance between how they seem to be bringing him back as a heel but being in chicago didnt get the response to his speech that he wouldve gotten elsewhere.

super excited about everyone showing up on the show if this is for real a roster split they picked some good fucking people for collision! jurys out on scorpio sky ive only ever seen him with frankie kazarian and i dont like kaz so

all the matches were good, even the tnt match i wasnt at all interested in was kind of like watchable and christian pretending he won the tnt title was really funny so ill let him have this. andrade and buddy were pretty incredible and miro looked fucking huge and awesome so ill forgive tony nese being there. skyewillow vs the outcasts slapped altho i wish they yknow. had more than one womens match. but it was really good skye looked incredible she and willow worked great together and im so happy she got the pin! i really hope skye and willow continue teaming together. also the outcats r much more enjoyable when saraya is not there, i love their over the top heel antics tbh

the main was good! sadly i dont give a shit about ftr and juice so it was kind of a struggle but they are good (well ftr are) i just dont like em. anyway punk looked good he was moving well and i thought it was well paced and everyone got their due time in the spotlight (being in the ring w punk)

overall this was a very solid start to this show, obviously we know aew can put on a good show but its the question of whether they are able to keep this momentum going. good wrestlers and a nice new look doesnt make the show good immediately, so im a little hesitant to say anything more about its impact right now but i had fun

#can u tell that i was mostly interested in skye lmao #galléros fecó naplója #wrassle

[sizhui]

hello angie :DD i am currently reading through your character study again! its very comprehensive so i hope to be able to get as much as I can out of it. also hehe ive noticed a pattern in what sorts of things you seem to enjoy writing about, from what ive read it seems wen kexing n ah xu (idk his name sorry) remind me somewhat of the mother n father from when she calls them down to dinner or perhaps wilfred (fogot) n his husband... but theres not so much erm downer here? anyways i like those things so im glad u can write about things so viscerally !! also i thoroughly enjoyed how u use settings, ghosts n hauntings to explore wen kexing's character. im not sure how much of these images are present in canon but from what i know of cn novels i wouldnt expect it to be too far from canon!

ill put the rest of my response under the cut !

it was very romantic i felt :) particularly the bits about like. letting go and becoming human, becoming properly tangible with ah xu. sort of accepting the incomprehensibility of their becoming if it makes sense? it was so very romantic to me.i particularly enjoyed the bit about gallows and ghosthood and houses? idk it was just so romantic it brought me to tears!! like it is about love!

i dont really know what the ghost or valley is but i enjoyed that u developed it overtime. also i enjoye dhow the story transitions, from wen kexing alone physically n w his thoughts to the ah xu entering his life, filling his memories n changing him. its good for the tone.

like i got the vibes that wen kexing is a ghostly gloomy man. he seems sorta cynical and forsaken but desiring deeply to be whole i think. the heaviness of his burden was conveyed well. from the visceral n shocking scene of eating his fathers corpse a complete inversion of natural order i guess and love . he feels very trapped, always struggling but not quite able to get there alone. i also found ig a struggle within him to just die lol or Not.

particularly i feel wen kexing's decision to cut down the forest in his heart, his perception of himself as a dying tree, among one of the ghosts (being haunted n himself haunting) rlly emphasise that he is stuck and this death looms ever forward

ALSO AAAAH PHYSICIALITY!!! i liked that how its used.. being able to be touched by others to confirm you are a living thing or believe you are but now

anuyways sorry this was long n rambly n nothing but really!! it felt like such a nice love story somehow!!

thumbs up i liked it !! :D r u watching anything next

HELLO DEAR LAB!!Thank you SO MUCH for such a long and thorough and beautiful analysis of my story, i let out a funny sound of joy like 10 times while reading it!!!!! Your perception of the story is pretty much exactly what I was trying to convey with it - i feel a little proud of both of us, and blessed to have a reader as wonderful as you!

In the novel there is a fraction of people called "ghosts" who live in that valley cast away from society, but it's never really explored what that status MEANS for them so this was my take on it - in a way it's canon compliant, but most of the ideas came from my crazy overthinking hehe, I'm really happy you enjoyed! I'm very happy you perceived this story as deeply romantic, because that was the goal - writing about painful things like suicidal ideation, haunting and eating your father's corpse (he does actually do that in the novel OUCH) and having it still be a love story... There is definitely a lot of struggle to Just Die in Wen Kexing. Like Ah Xu explicitly wants to die in the novel and everyone always talks about that, but i also perceived the same in Wen Kexing and felt that that was one of the reasons they were able to connect and wanted to write about it. I'm happy you were able to get such a good grip on his character from my writing alone! I also usually avoid writing about physicality so I'm glad it fit in well here and served the story well !

Please don't apologize for this being long because that made me very happy, and it's definitely not rambly and nothing, it's everything to me! Thank you, dear Lab, for reading my work with such care ♥️♥️♥️♥️

P. S. IT ALSO MADE ME HAPPY THAT U CONNECTED IT TO BSCTTD . EVERYTHING ALWAYS COMES BACK TO IT.

[cerealmonster15]

For the ship ask thing which I am late for! Naramis teehee. Also whoever that dog boy is in your dating sim game! I like that one.

NARAMIS SELECTED!! MY BOYS MY BOOOOOOOOOOOOOYS

[referring 2 this post]

Whether I ship it or not

YEA i think theyre real cute! tho i can also appreciate them as platonic besties, either way they have a Good Vibe together. i am also a sucker for besties to lovers so theres always some overlap when i like characters as bffs vs a couple lol

Why I ship it or not

^i like friends to lovers!! i think they are silly little guys that Hang Out and i appreciate that . also i was first 👀 during the scene where uhhh [frantically googling for a screenshot of the scene im thinkin of]

ok that was easier than i thought, thats literally the first pic that popped up when i searched just 'narancia mista' lol. anyway during this part i Forgot™ that mista was like, extremely injured and was leaning on narancia for literal physical support, so i was like why are they just casually cuddling like that 🤔 cuz i mean look at that screenshot lol. out of context you wouldnt even know one of em's inujured, u cant see the blood, he doesnt look like hes struggling at all, theyre just Hanging Out :^) also narancia clinging to mista when The Plane Was Crashing was cute lol. and when he clinged to mista again / mista held him back during the.... the scene where.... where u know.... with the rock and the sun and the- [starts crying] anyway

characters: [make casual contact once or twice] me: aw :) in my brain forever now :)

My opinion on their canon potential (chemistry, canon interactions, etc)

i mean as far as canon canon goes we know that didnt happen or anything but like. idk i like to believe in my heart it couldve been possible if we suspend our disbelieve just a touch LOL like. they hang out. the vibes are there. remember that one time they saw that randomass guy and were like HES PROBABLY A STAND USER GET HIS ASS, and then they just did??? no question??? like they were wrong but they were wrong TOGETHER [and with abbaccio i lsdkjfdsfklj]. god thats such a funny scene. anyway my point is they are cool bros and i think they might enjoy holding hands. i feel like if i had more scenes fresh in my mind this post would be twice as long, im just a lil foggy WAIT

look at narancia and mista in the bg of this panel from the manga chasing frogs around together. #lovewins. they should eat hot pockets together.

My opinion on fanon interpretations/fandom around it (Favorite widespread hcs, pet-peeves, etc)

HMMMM. i like when people insert them into memes. i feel like those 2 goobers were made for memes. i love jokes and funnies so thats probs why i like them so much fdsjklf.

uuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i cant remember if ive seen any hcs i dont like about them? i would simply like to see More Of Them

#gaminegay #asks #fuck yea my absolute lads and boys #I FEEL LIKE IM FORGETTING A LOT HERE???????? #my brain is doin a dial up noise rn #theyre like a casual cool bro ship in my brain #a ship i dont gotta think 2 hard about

[sajaffery]

3...

i have to come up with a different proverb. maybe a new one. this is harder then i thought. but im really enjoying doing it. it feels like a wrting exercise. shit! it is a wrting exercise and i hate those. i absolutely hate them because they feel gimicky and unimaginative. but i came up with this on my own. so is it unimaginative? wait isnt there something called free association writing? is that what im doing right now? im not sure. i dont think youre allowed to think in that you’re just supposed to write and write and write and write. but how can you write without thinking? okay charger has been plugged back in and i can stop and think again. full disclosure by the way i am cheating to a certain extent because i keep editing every fifth mistake i make. im still leaving a lot in there to make this feel authentic. i felt like adding an emoticon there. cue self loathing. but no wait. old white men dont like emoticons do they? that good we like that. but young white girls do like emoticons. and justin bieber. dont know which way to turn now. lets move on. and i’m blank. i cant get justin bieber out of my head. good thing its not young white girls because that would be creepy. andd liable. is liable the right word. i want to google but i cant. new rule! no googling allowed. just train of…no no no. we cant use that either no trains allowed. old white men use trains. river of thoughts? cheesy. to similar to stream of consciousness, which isnt so bad because Virgina Woolf is a dead white woman. and i hate to love joyce. Love Dubliners. Love the idea of Ulysses, despite never getting past page 50 and not understanding what the hell happened in the forty or so pages i do read. except a young jesuit was or wasnt shaving. no word count either. new rule. im always checking word count to make myself feel good but we wont be doing that anymore. but i cant do this in the mornings anymore. not when i have to write. i mean seriously write because i would like to get published one day. read my name on the cover of a book. a hardback thak you very much because i do still love those (dead white men be damned) even if i dont particulalrly like paying for them. 15.99 for a book is ridiculous. especially when you can get it for 1p plus shipping costs in a few months time. i just cheated again. i deleted a whole paragraph i dint like anymore. its just felt repetitive like i was just telling you the same thing all over again in different word. filler. and we don’t like filler. its something EL James would use. i’m so glad EL James has become the by word for bad literature. she fully deserves it and im not just saying that because shes made a shit load of money. it does help though.it also helps that everyone seems to know who she is. James Patterson is equally shit, actually hes a different kind of shit. those alex cross books werent too bad to begin with. they certainly made good movies. anything with morgan freeman is a good movie. i hope if god does exist he does look like him. i wouldnt mind listening to him for all off eternity then. but then he started buying up unpublished manuscripts, polishing them up and printing them as his own with the real author getting a co-write. that fucking pisses me off. and he has the nerve to defend it by saying that he’s helping young unpublished authors. no you’re not asshole youre just printing money and using struggling authors just like every other arsehole looking to make a quick buck is. but you cant badmouth patterson because most nonreaders don’t know about him. but everybody knows EL James. god bless anal beads. okay im back. its the same day but i just posted this went downstairs to make some more green tea and came back up to add a little more to it. had two slices of chocolate cake too. i thought i was eating more because i was having a hard time writing but apparently i just like cake. and stuffing myself to point of explosion. edited slices and explpsion. there must be a way to switch off the squiggly lines that come up while im wrting this. typing. i’m only typing this.

[awriterandabird]

not mentally ill enough to be fun for internet users to poke at, too mentally ill to be brushed off as "quirky", but just mentally ill enough to catch myself in yet another unending spiral of shame and agony!

wooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

(dont press read more unless you read those tags. im warning you.)

for the love of GOD please help? stop?

earlier someone asked how they could help i told them to give me space i don't want to explode i feel like i need the opposite of space but also if anyone comes close to me i want to golf them into the sun don't talk to me. don't perceive me please talk to me. don't leave me

i wish i could channel this into something productive (not that i think anyone would want to see that. there's better artists and better art. whats one more little fag on the internet making stories about depression and derealization and autism and burnout. i don't have anything new to add.)

today i went outside and i had trouble staying in my own head

for a while i was a father struggling to keep doing his job because 'reality' around me kept feeling weird and wrong and i remember punching a hole in the wall and i heard birdsong but the birdsong was real and i was back on earth (in my body) and the vignette around my vision was tangible. a fly landed on my arm and it made me yell. i was real suddenly- the veil was gone. i walked around and i looked at some things. i saw a weed growing in the cracks of the asphalt and i saw grass growing through a circle of rocks. at the fairy tree i found a perfectly round rock and wondered what was inside. i was back in the crystal shop- the one across the water- where the ferry took us i remember the perfect little geodes they sold i was back home i remember readying that hammer only to completely fuck up the swing and ended up pulverizing most of it. but i looked and the pieces were right there at the fairy tree. i thought about art and how i would portray things if i and i was that father again and i was struggling to explain i couldn't speak at all really even in the arms of my wife i fought myself and another voice (myself) and i told myself im not real and i told myself why do i feel like im stealing something from someone else and why do i feel like my life is over but it never started and i was in the backyard looking for my cat when the gate slammed. it slammed in the wind. im real again. the sun is still out. the neighbors just came back home- i saw their car pull in. im ashamed to keep wasting time outside, so i walk back in my house

i might have gotten the order of events wrong

does it matter

does writing it down even matter

im giving the void (at first i typed "voice") a recollection of something that doest matter

recorded here for all of time, wasting space on a server, rotting, festering.

who is this for is this for myself?

wouldnt it be easier if i just told the people in my real life what was going on,

no you know what shut the fuck up.

go get a job dumbass.

..yeah i feel like a right waste of space.

"look. walk-ins accepted. you can apply here too when you apply at [x] tomorrow" "tomorrow?" "what else do you have going on in your life?" we walked down the rest of the aisle in silence. i didn't have a reply.

"whats the difference between a psychologist and a psychiatrist?" "one can prescribe you drugs i think" "oh" we drove for 10 minutes in silence. i thought about my next question so carefully. i must have gone through dozens of iterations in that 5 minutes. i was the only one talking. during those 8 minutes i don't remember what the radio played. "which one of those two... tells you about if you have things in your head?" "what do you mean things in your head?" "like-" "like schizophrenia?" "yeah" "a psychiatrist i think. no? a psychologist. i forget" "yeah that's okay you don't know the answer, i probably should have researched myself, its kind of a lot of me to have expected you to have all the answers." "okay"

tomorrow i wake up. i have two options

>disappoint everyone (default option, no action required) >shut up, man up, get out of my room, become presentable, act Normal, interview at two different places, land a job, support the house, be a perfect functioning person

do i have an option

can i at least be a better person than writing a pathetic little vent longer than the colors of the sky. that no one cares about. that i wont care about in. fucking. whenever i can regulate my emotions again

wait will that even happen (someone made me go to type "(never)")

dear god. dear fucking lord. ive only been typing for. not long. it can't have been that long- less than half an hour- rollover just ended- but why the fuck did that person message me 6 times while im on DnD

aaaaaaaaaUGH i WANT TO GO. TO. BED.

WHY DO PEOPLE KEEP TRYING TO TALK TO ME

BUT THEY NEVER WANT TO TALK TO ME

7 messages

why cant we talk about nice things? i have nice things too- when i see them. in that other place. posting back and forth admiring each others stories and characters. i have that too. please. please can you talk to me

but then i swear like clockwork someone reaches out and i think no. not YOU. i want. THEM. (they don't exist) (they are a nebulous construct) what do i want. what do i fucking want. what do i care about? who do i care about?

im sorry. im so sorry. im sorry and i'll promise to respond to you. im sorry i know how it feels to be ignored i don't want to do that to you. im sorry i don't understand these things you send me. i don't understand

earlier tonight i failed once again to follow a simple request

(i keep looking up at those 7 unread messages)

i failed to follow it and i felt so. broken? useless? stupid? worthless? how can you expect someone _like me_ to get a job. to be _functional_

i dont even know if what i want to do is what i want to do anymore

all that time i spent in school. im sorry i wasted your time. im sorry im not going to amount to anything more than that. than this.

"they said they lost you in the system" "lost?? i. i submitted 3 times. under 'jay', under '[dead]', under '[last1]', under '[last1-last2]', i tried. i tried." -- "maybe they just don't want to hire me" "that's not it" "[z] got back to me that one time. do you remember?" "oh only a little-" "they said they're not hiring for night positions. even if on the website, the spot is still open. maybe if i just. replied back again and told them i'd do day anyways" "well, would you rather work at [x], or [y], or [z]?" "[y] i guess... not because i want to work in fast food but the benefits-"

the one blessing of tonight is that at least i haven't been super dysphoric. im too busy trying to claw back into my own body to be worried about whether or not it fits. i just need to be IN one

its been so hard to think of it as anything other than "the body", rather than "me". its. supposed to be "me" i think

whatever that means

my head is swimming again. i need to end this post

7 unread messages

i know i'll hit post, and i'll never see this passage again good riddance. maybe with all the bile ejected now i can actually be

something. i still dont know.

#vent. you can ignore this one #please dont read this if you feel shitty yourself. i dont want to make it worse #also #if you're from the only community i care about (you'll know who you are) #skip this. dont ruin your perception of me. #not reading this one back to check for errors bc its 100% stream of consciousness #so as a warning this is probably mostly nonsense because i feel quite ~wibbery~ right now #i'll come back and make this private later #i need. the catharsis of shouting into the void

[richardsphere]

Rwby Catchup V7E10

Writing this after the fact, so non-chronological order: Weiss mom has a drinking problem, in the same episode that reminds us Qrow is trying to kick the same habit. To indicate exactly how terrible a parent Jaques is, she cries happy tears from hearing her daughter isnt coming back home. Whitley hates his sisters for abandoning him to his father. (great scene, great characterisation. Love it entirely). I dont ship it (yet) or anything, but i do hope they’ll join the same AA group at some point. Imagine the thrill of getting to arrest your own dad. Arthur is still sort of generic, but he’s earned a trait besides Smarm and Science: He’s a half-decent salesperson. Also a bit of a showman with a sense of drama. Innocents are about to freeze, and i’ll admit that i like seeing a businessman turned corrupt politician actually face accountability but i dont know if thats the writing or my frustration with the having access to the internet during the Trump Administration. I hope this’ll be the end of his character, he seems like exactly the type of villain whose presence is better felt in absence. (as in the scar on Weiss’ face is enough presence on its own, we dont actually need his presence that much. I might be wording it badly. Basically im worried they’re gonna stage a breakout scene for him and he’ll overstay his unwelcome as a character.) Neopolitan is back, and she still leaves me feeling as cold about her presence in the narrative as the icecream she is named after, but that’s largely because its hard to characterise a character who does not speak. (but then, her being a one-note character is actually a strength. The same as Wile-E-Coyote being one-note is a good thing).  This brings me to a little segment that I call “Richard struggles to figure out what the deal with Emerald & Neo even is”. Today on RSTFOWTDE&NES: I’ll openly but shamefully admit it took me verry long to realise that neo’s semblance was some kind of pseudo-illusion thing? Though at least some have seemed semi-tangible. In my defense her earliest appearances mostly had her use it to vanish into thin air so i thought she was just a teleporter like Ruby. Then when i finally figured out Neo had illusions, i sort of got confused and thought a lot of Emeralds things in the tournament where actually Neo doing that. I guess what im trying to say is its kind of weird for the villains to have 2 different illusion-based characters, and for one of them to have an “only one target at a time” limitation. like thats sort of weird isnt it? I might be misremembering, but did Maid!Neo talk to Weiss? Or was that a different maid who has been stuffed into a closet off-screen so Neo could take her place afterwards? Its sort of unclear to me. Cinder is also here, God i hope she gets a character besides “generic hunger for power” at some point but if there is i havent seen it yet. But its nice to know that Ozpin isnt the only one whose lieutenants can betray them at least, not much to say she’s still spending most of the plot looking ominously. Whitley crying on the stairs, This family needs more hugs and less alcohol. Robyn, you’re nice. I dont know what more to say. You’re the only character in Atlas i would trust to run a popsiclestand, Not a lot of deep going on with her, but Robin Hood parodies live and thrive by virtue of their simplicity. They finally tell James that Salem cant be killed and that they lied about the relic’s number of questions, i’ll admit i only ever understood one of those two lies. (They could’ve just claimed “ozpin told us she cant be killed/do you really believe that if she could be killed Ozpin wouldnt have succeeded a thousand lifetimes ago). Does this mean the tower is cancelled? Is operation “100 Shions at once” finally cancelled? NO because Oscar said to stop keeping Salem a secret, so that plan is still a go apparently.  The Penny and Winter Dont Understand Eachother scene was great, and i adored the moment Winter thought “oh shit, did i just pull a robo-racism?”. Verry “Pyrrha accidentally implies Jaune should jump off the roof” energy there.

#rwby

[curedeity]

throwing in zeo !! what would any oc(s) u choose think about him :3

Okay okay time for my shogun steel team dungeon thoughts on my favorite og team dungeon member!

Avery: didnt really like him at first. Out of all the og team dungeon members, Zeo was the most strict one, but also the one who ran most of their training. Zeo kinda knows hes the one the kids dislike the most, and is a bit selfconcious about that, but keeps trying to reach out to Avery after she becomes captain. Avery eventually starts going to him for advice, even if they never see exactly eye to eye. I think she learns a lot about team management from him. Also they both work to have more fun leading the team so everyone isnt as stressed, though thats a challenge for the both of them, so they commiserate over that.

Anya: poor sweet anya. She likes Zeo. She tended to try to help him out with work and management and shadow him, but she wouldnt let him exactly mentor her. As she goes through her main arc, Zeos the first adult to notice whats going on, and tries to reach out to her. He fails. He fails a loooooot. He honestly feels really bad about how anya turned out and beats himself over it a lot, even after the story ends, until anya finally confronts him and is like "its my mistakes that led me to that, and id prefer you stop mourning them and just see how im making myself better from there." Anyway, hes the main adult she communicates with after the story ends. Honestly, probably the only one. They finally get a nice mentorship, and Zeo feels soooo out of his depth.

Miriam: Zeo doesnt like Miriam. Like, he looks at her and thinks "that is the weirdest fucking teenager ive ever met what the fuck is wrong with her." Also Toby actually does mentor Miriam a lot, so Zeo will turn to him like "how are you not put off by her vibes?" And Toby will shrug and say "your still froends with jack and damian." Really, she and Zeo dont really hate each other, but they do have a little power struggle over how to mentor the team. Miriam really respects Zeo, but refuses to compromise. I dont think they ever get along that well, but they both do trust each other to care for and mentor the team.

Trey: Zeo looks at Trey and then back at Masamune and King like "did you two manage to clone yourselves????" Zeo mostly is just in charge of Treys training, and leaves the mentorship duties up to Masamune and King. They probably have the chillest relationship Zeo has with anybody, though slmetimes Zeo just gets tired of how much energy this kid has.

Shui: hate each other. Zeo spends so much time reminding himself "theyre a kid theyre a kid theyre a kid-" so he wouldnt say he hates them but goddamn do they get on each others nerves. Shui thinks Zeo is the third weakest member of the team (they have a ranking) and Zeo is like "wow this kid is the reason i want to quit blading sometimes." Shui wont listen to practically anything Zeo tells them to do, and because Zeo is in charge of training, thats a problem. Zeo is constantly having an existential crisis over how to get Shui to listen to him. Eventually, Shui will chill out just a bit. Eventually. Zeo got the worst kids to mentor on god on god

#oc ask game #thank you qloof i had thoughts this took so long to type #zeo wondering why his group of kids is so fucked up #he just wanted some chill kids to run through their paces #hes 100% the best coach at dungeon gym though. only one who can manage all of it

[daedalusdavinci]

im just gonna spitball fic ideas here bc i dont have any rn and i wanna see if this helps me brainstorm

i kinda feel like writing bruharv, but i also feel like i write literally so much bruharv all the time and im kind of sick of being That Guy? it feels like im incapable of doing anything else or something. but i also dont really have any concrete ideas besides vague feelings that are about as coherent as mashing two barbie dolls together and saying “now kiss”

on that note though, i could revisit bruharv as it stands in the jdau, but i dont think theres a lot to say right now. i think i covered it all in lost days. there probably wont be more to say about it until after jason tells them hes back, and then itll be getting into more of the [spoilers] betrayal stuff and harvey and 2f taking the confession completely differently from bruce and how that feeds into the divorce arc and how insufferable they are. btu i still havent really figured out how i want to write jason telling harvey and 2f in particular, and i kinda think i dont want to write it, and just want to skip forward until after? the dick and jason fic was almost impossible to write particularly bc of shit im going thru irl rn and ik that fic would be harder. maybe ill just do that and pick up with a fic of what their relationship is starting to shape into post rh. should proooobably finish reading damians comics first tho and maybe some of cass’s (i might not bother reading any n52 ones, given that almost everything so far has been 100% preboot characterizations)

on a DIFFERENT note but still bruharv related, i could indulge that little voice in the back of my head that wants me to dig my fingers into full on btas characterization with judge and hardac!bruce and the full mess. i dont know what id do with it though i just have a lot of feelings about both of them

setting aside all of that,

im still thinking about that detective eddie/brce au. i just picked up a bunch of detective books from the library yesterday so ill probably read those over the weekend and then maybe ill finally hammer out some kind of plot. but thats not gonna be until this weekend and in the meantime ??? i have a lot of thoughts about like the kinds of people they are and the kinds of characters and the bakcground characters in this au but no plot and augh. maybe i should bend someones ear and just rant characters for a while and see what happens

i also mentioned ages ago that i was thinking abt a pjo au where nico brings jason bck from the dead and leo is heavily involved and shit and i still think that that would be sick asf but id have to reread all of pjo to do it probably and rn my reading list consists of detective novels, then asoue, THEN maybe pjo, so god honestly knows when/if ill get around to it. its also like. when i came up w this idea i was in a place where the vibes w my writing was very much melancholy and bittersweet and heavy on the death and rn im uhhh not in that place as much anymore im struggling to figure out what direction i want to go in instead

maybe ill go back to my roots andjust start writing fluffy pjo fics again. REALLY return to the roots. just garbage nonsense fics. idk.

i wish i had the braincells to write something hs but i dont and i havent in ages and theres a million reasons for that but ill probably try and reread a few of my older fics soon and well see what comes out of that

anyway thats about where my head is at rn lolll i dont expect anyone to have read this but if you have thoughts i wouldnt mind hearing them it helps to feel like im not talking to air sometimes

#tbd

[0thsense]

28 9 2022

sigh. there is a 50% chance this is my last post on the blog. yesterday i felt very depressed in bed and i resolved to make a blog to write and vent, but today i randomly feel better. is it because i internalized what i thought about yesterday? i was feeling unhappy because my friend ned did not seem to be as happy to spend time with me. we were at one point comfortable and happy sharing our true thoughts but now i feel a sense of distance. it only makes sense because we live in different places for many years now but i cant help but feel there is more to it. our different stages in life with my degeneration while he is in a happy relationship and pursuing early retirement. i cant help but feel that maybe he just doesnt find as much value in our relationship anymore, while maybe im clinging on to my past glory. he seemed to value martin's company more because martin keeps up with the latest gossip from a variety of friend groups and perhaps i cant even offer anything more interesting than that anymore to ned. writing this is making me feel depressed again. i keep thinking about all the opportunities that ive missed and im already 27 now. i was telling martin on the subway back to our hotel how i read somewhere that your mental peak is at 25, and its just downhill from there. i tried to pretend and believe that i didn't let that change how i act, as martin annoyingly took the obvious position of 'oh are you going to just give up because of that', but i do think about it quite a bit. i dont have much time left, and worse yet i didnt realize how little time i have as ive squandered the past few years. i poured so much time into getting good at these games i dont want to mention, and achieved the goals i set. the only problem being that the goals were a proxy for actually being able to achieve the real goals i actually care about, and i still cannot achieve those real goals. i wonder if anybody other than me will ever read this. i hope that some random person finds this and finds it interesting enough to read and share. i dont think i will share this to anyone i know unless in time i become someone who can look back on this and laugh. that seems currently unlikely. today i met jarvis's friends. im not thinking of names for them because i dont think they will be recurring characters. i still struggle with meeting new people, i dont think the depressed state i am in helps very much for that. i probably came off as not shy but a little weird, which i guess is pretty accurate. i just wish i could make connections more easily, everything i do still feels forced, just like how its felt my whole life. it makes me worry about meeting a romantic partner. i used to think that if i could just show someone my true self i wouldnt have trouble finding a partner, but now im unsure of even that. ive lost a lot of confidence in my true self, and i also think my true self has truly become less compelling. im in a bit of a rut i suppose. if i start thinking all of these things every day i might do it. that felt forced to write but this blog is supposed to be a stream of consciousness so i should not hold back, though im probably just thinking it because its my first day writing this blog. i wonder if i should include mundane things like wow i scrolled up and this is a giant wall of text. probably not because it doesnt add anything and this is already getting very long. this might be the most words ive written in a single day since like my last essay in college, like more than 5 years ago. thats very sad to think about. my friend yan just posted that he will come home for 2-3 weeks for christmas. im very excited to hang out with yan again, but i have a small fear that he will treat me like ned. that would make me really sad. im kind of supposed to plan something important during those 2-3 weeks for the toddpole friend group, but its unclear and messy and it stresses me out a bit to think about it. i hope it works out, i think i can do it. of course no matter how well i do it i will get made fun of for it but thats just how it is.LIMIT

[noxiatoxia]

Tell me more about autistic Kaoru

OF COURSE. his biggest special interest is Cinderella. Absolutley adores that movie and watches it constantly. Was mostly into it as a child/in middle school but he still loves it and talks abt it. Watched it so much I think Hikaru is able to recite the whole thing word for word.

He also had an mlp phase that he's very embrassed abt (also bc Hikaru routinely made fun of him for it) (but Hikaru also watched it with him so what does that say about him...). His fave was always Rarity. Didn't watch the later seasons as he kinda forgot to. G5 was announced when he was in college and it brought all the memories back and somehow he and Hikaru convinced the whole Host Club to watch it with them. Hani loves it, Haruhi thought it was cute, Tamaki cried (hes emotional), Kyoya doesn't give a shit, and Takashi liked it but you wouldnt know that bc he never talks lol.

Since his autism isn't severe, it wasn't really recognized and he didn't get diagnosed until after highschool. He and Hikaru never really thought about it much, they just figured that's how Kaoru was. Like, that he just loved certain things a whole lot and was compelled to talk abt them for hours, that he got really fidgety when excited (I would think pacing/moving around a lot), and that he just hated certain textures with a passions (when he was a little kid he cried if people tried to make him wear socks normally. He hated the feeling so bad he Must wear them inside-out) (no im not projecting what are you saying haha) and that he could be overwhelmed and unable to do certain tasks (executive dysfunction) for "no reason"

It was actually Haruhi who, after being Kaoru's friend for all of highschool, suggested he get tested because she thinks he MIGHT be autistic. So he did, and well what would you know. At least it explained a lot of things he couldn't adequately explain before.

Side note I think Hikaru has ADHD. He moves on from topics/ideas at the speed of light and gets bored very, very easily. Its a known thing that the twins will stop doing something if it gets boring, but I like to think 90% of the time it was Hikaru who decided those things were boring and Kaoru just followed along bc he didn't care one way or the other. He's always looking for something to keep himself occupied so that's why he comes up with so many crazy ideas. The introduction of the Host Club actually helped improve his quality of life bc 1. it gave him something to do and someplace where he could excersizes his ideas and 2. it was able to teach him some patience since he DID have to be still and slow occasionally just chatting with people. I also think it helped both twins with getting used to routines, since they never cared much for school (Hikaru struggled to pay attention and Kaoru did as well because he thought it was boring).

Hikaru got his diagnosis the same time as Kaoru since they figured they should both get tested just in case (and because he didn't want Kaoru to feel singled out). He didn't expect anything to come from it but surprise!

#ohshc #;noxiatalksia #many thoughts on these 2