#thank you for this ask dear !!! truly means the world that u associate my writing to be very bridgerton-esque | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

etheries1015 · 2 months

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Dear writer whose writings I love,

HEYYO. IT'S ME AGAIN. (I sent the Lilia using u as a stress relief you ask heheheha!!)

SO LIKE IMAGINE THIS (unrequited love that is actually requited love!)

You're on a "date" with Lilia to the gardens. (You wish)

And then you get to the Gardina section of the flowers and show it to him, knowing fully of what it means. (You hope, yet also don't hope he gets what's you're trying to say)

[FUN FACT: Gardenias are elegant and fragrant flowers that have long been associated with love, romance, and admiration. They are often used to express a secret or hidden love, as their sweet scent and delicate petals can be seen as a symbol of devotion and affection that is not openly expressed. The gardenia’s white or pale yellow petals are said to represent the purity and sincerity of a love that is kept hidden, while the intoxicating fragrance symbolizes the passion and intensity of the feelings that are being concealed. Gardenias are also often associated with mystery and secrecy, making them the perfect flower to symbolize a love that is kept hidden from the rest of the world. They have been used in literature and poetry for centuries to represent the hidden desires and passions of characters who cannot express their feelings openly]

SSSOOOOOOO

This can go SO. MANY. WAYS.

He doesn't know and does nothing. This ends up in you making a poem about Gardina flowers to him, and he does something after that, taking the hint. (Good ending! With proposal and stuff and hehe fluff!! I love fluff)

He knows and asks you directly. (PLS GIVE THIS A GOOD ENDING. IDK HOW TO CONTINUE)

My brain is now fried again. Please expand. I will request every time my brain power suddenly shoots up. Goodbye, and see you again next time.

-🦇

Hello lovely! Yes yes, you actually revealed yourself to me after I answered that ask! Heuheu. No need to be anon! However, if that it what you prefer, I shall not convince you otherwise <3

ANYWAYS I have ALWAYS loved the notion of flowers having meanings and their beautiful poems that come in toe with their vibrant petals. It's truly a wonderful thing, I really wanna study them more. Fun fact! My favorite flower is a peony! I have a tattoo on my shoulder of a peony! ...in slue with an entire sleeve of random flowers, my tattoo artist just made up. Maybe the other arm I'll use for more structural floral... sorry for the tangent DHKFJSLDjf I love flowers. Thank you for this ask heuehueheue

Ahhhhhhh the idea of going out to a garden with Lilia...

I actually like to have this little headcannon that since Malleus is so interested in flowers and gardening, that perhaps he got that from Lilia. Flowers are our friends, after all! And what's better than making an entire garden of little friends to nourish? Along with creating a beautiful garden of roses, Malleus had delved deep into the world of floral poetry and representation.

You grab onto Lilias hand and pull him towards the back of ramshackle to show off the garden you and Malleus had placed together. Malleus was truly your wing man during this entire thing, he had vast knowledge about flowers and knew just the ones to plant In one large romantic gesture for the old fae. Malleus had landed you books and helped you study their different meanings, even taking time out of gargoyle studies club to dedicate gardening your surprise for Lilia.

"What has gotten you so eager, little bat?" Lilia chuckled, "Must truly be grand if you're so worked up like this!" You couldn't hide your excitement or giddiness as you headed towards the gate leading to the garden, a large black intricately designed gate in that perfectly suited the chicness of the dorm. Upon opening the gates, it revealed a large grandiose garden full of flowers of all sorts. Lilia's eyes widened as well as a toothy grin climbing onto his features, raising an impressed eyebrow.

"So this is what you and Malleus have been working so hard on?" He inquired, stepping forward and taking a look around, "I must say, it's rather an impressive feat! The sheer size is almost enough to rival Malleus's own rose garden back at the castle." You smiled brightly at him and skipped over to a particular patch you were proud of; Gardenias.

"These are Gardenias!" You pursed your lips as you bent over and grabbed something you had prepped before hand, taking hold of a neatly wrapped bouquet of gardenias and with a trembling hand pushing them in the arms of the fae. Lilia started slightly and took a gentle sniff of the flowers taking in their creamy sweet scent that reminded him of coconuts and peach. "They...they're for you!" You smiled.

"Oh they're lovely," Lilia said, "I presume you and Malleus are particularly proud of these ones! They bloomed wonderfully. I shall put them in my room!...oh, but I suppose they will need sunlight. Perhaps keeping them in Silvers care may be better..." You felt your heart drop and smile twitch ever so slightly. Pursing your lips you let out a dry nervous chuckle, tilting your head in awkwardness.

"I..Uh," You bit down your bottom lip, "Well, they were for you," You let out a breathy laugh.

"Of course! However I'm worried they may wilt in my care and you worked so hard! Hmm. Oh! I could put them in the lounge, so that everyone can see yours and Malleus's hard work!" You couldn't even bother to explain to him you were the one to nurture these flowers on your own upon Malleu's recommendation. He swore that Lilia would understand the meaning...it was common for fae folk to be knowledgeable on the world of flowers. Either Malleus Lied to you, which was unlikely, or Lilia was a part of the percentage that truly hadn't a clue.

You began to sweat bullets. Throughout this entire exchange, you weren't certain he understood your intentions. Or... was he purposefully deflecting the fact you had mainly meant this as a surprise for him? Was he thinking you were simply making excuses to hang out with Malleus? Or was he just that oblivious? It was rather distressing, for you already had an inkling that Lilia had not returned your feelings, and this only solidified your worries.

You began to wilt like a flower without water, your energy dying and your smiles becoming fake. You tried a few more times to hand him flowers, such as a singular rose (symbolizing love at first sight, a "one and only" in which the person you gift you give your heart to.) He insisted on taking a few more to decorate the lounge with.

This plan was failing terribly.

Finally, you let out a loud groan of frustration, pulling out a sheet of paper from your pocket with a burst of confidence and embarrassment. Your face took on a bright shade of red, pushing the letter into his chest. Lilia struggled to catch it with his hands full of flowers, eyes wide in bewilderment at this sudden display you put on. He stared in shock and confusion, unable to get a word out before you bolted out of the garden and to the dorm.

"Read that later!" You cried out.

"W-wait- what is-" He attempted to catch your attention, yet you were already out of view, leaving the fae utterly confused standing in the middle of the garden with arms full of flowers.

You threw yourself onto your bed and grasped your pillow, curling into a ball and groaning into it.

"eh? What's up with you?" Grim asked, "And what's this piece of paper?"

You sat up in a rush with wide eyes, staring at a piece of paper that you seemingly dropped from your person. You grabbed hold of it and took a look. It was the second page of the letter you had given Lilia... and undeniably the most important part. The first page detailed the history of flowers and how they have significance to them

the second page was the meanings of the flowers and why you chose them for the fae.

It was your confession.

You had forgotten to hand it to him in your flustered state.

You screamed into the pillow.

~ At Diasomnia ~

Lilia sat in the dorm lounge, reading over the page you had given him.

"Hmm...I knew flowers had meanings, but this letter seems unfinished. This is simply prefacing the history of flowers and that they hold meaning with a simple poem at the end, but the definitions they mentioned would be on the second page seem to be missing..." Lilia rubbed his head in confusion turning the paper around to find some sort of indication of continuation, Malleus walking in on the fae. Malleus flashed a mischievous smile.

"How did the visit to the garden go?" He inquired, "You seem confused rather than elated as I thought you would be..did something go ary?" He pointed out. Lilia shrugged and looked back at the tall draconic fae, tilting his head.

"I thought it was going well, (y/n) even handed me a bunch of flowers to bring back, along with this letter..." Lilia took a gander at the vase full of Gardenias and glanced back down at the letter in which stated every flower has a significant meaning.

"Malleus, could you tell me what Gardenias mean? I believe (y/n) meant to explain it to me, but the second half of this letter is missing." Malleus raised an eyebrow.

"I thought you would know?" Malleus furrowed his eyebrows, grabbing hold of the letter and skimming through its contents.

"Of course not. I like flowers of course, but I never took the time to truly study them as you did. I haven't a clue about definitions and things of the sort." The color seemed to drain from Malleus's face at realizing his mistake, before making his way to the gardenias and gently touching a petal from its bloom. He took a deep breath before giving a detailed explanation of their meaning: Passion, love romance, secrecy... Malleus explained the flower was to express a secret love that the prefect held for Lilia. Something that clearly went way over the old man's head.

Lilias's jaw was dropped to the ground, before quickly disappearing in a fog of green smoke.

He had to get the other half of that letter.

#Twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #twisted wonderland headcannons #twst headcannons #twst x reader #Lilia #Lilia headcannons #Lilia Vanrouge headcannons #Lilia x reader #Lilia vanrouge x reader

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twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat · 2 months

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HIHIHI ARI!!! MY LITTLE SWEET IRIS MY DEAR BELOVED!!!! DID U SLEEP WELL? how is the gojo fluff coming along? are the words working with you? (they better be smh!!!) anyway anyway i am here to thank u for ur words. sleepy sugu swims in my head and everytime he speaks it's just your words that are coming out idk u guys are kind of One in my head i think... YOUR WORDS MEAN THE WORLD TO ME I AM HOLDING THEM IN MY PALM N I AM NUZZLING AGAINST THEM OK!

btw i was thinking whether he'd say please in the end too or not... bc i think he wouldn't wanna come off as too bossy? but then i decided to not put it in bc i think his tone would already indicate that. a very very silent plea....

and hahshshahaha i'm glad u liked the silly little poetry lines too that made me feel so warm WAHHHHHHHHHH okeoke i'm giving u a big hug and a wet fucking smooch on ur forehead MWAHHHH thank u for existing my love<3333333333333 i hope ur day will go sunnily that is not a word but i am making it into one rn the sun will warm u always always always

- @catchuuu

MICKEYYYY MY ANGEL MY LITTLE SUNFLOWER SEED good morning to u too !!!! <333 i slept like a fucking log LMAO i had to drag myself out of bed.. almost fell asleep on my way out …….. i think i had a scary dream but it was fine i snoozed a bunch I HOPE YOUR SLEEP WAS JUST AS SOFT <333

and wahhh thank YOU sm for writing it 🥺🥺🥺 AND FOR THE TAG I ALMOST EXPLODED WHEN I SAW IT IN MY NOTIFS mickey!sugu is such a gift i love him sm :(((( pls kiss his little head for me.

“u guys are kind of One in my head i think” I’M SO HONOURED?????? it’s crazy that u say that too bc i 100% associate soft sleepy satoru with u 😭😭 i’m writing the fic rn and i’m just constantly going… ohhh mickey might like this line….. i wonder if i can make mickey cry if i make toru cute enough………. this part is very mickeycoded…………… PHDJSP u get what i mean. the duo is duoing <3333

AND AND AND!! that’s such a good question tbh….. i agree with u i think that under normal circumstances sugu would say please bc he is in fact a big ol people pleaser smh BUT…. when he’s so sleepy and unguarded i think it would just kinda slip out :((( it’s desperate in a way!! he just needs to feel u. he’d explode if u stopped. :((((

i think that when you get down to it sugu is a bit of a brat tbh.. he’s similar to satoru he just hides it better. but i think he’s such a sweet whiny little clingy brat when he truly trusts u <3333 when you guys have been dating for a while he’s flopping down on you like a big dog and asking so sweetly if u could play with his hair pls 🥺🥺…. if you tease him or decline he starts demanding it though PHDJDBD … “i do so much for this family and you can’t even spare a minute out of your day to appreciate me” IT WAS NEVER THAT SERIOUS SUGU ??? I WAS JUST JOKING ??????? he’s the silliest man alive… (the “family” in question is u + ur three cats btw <33 he’s a cat dad. it’s canon.)

#MICKEY ILY I HOPE YOUR DAY IS WONDERFUL !!! i hope it goes sunnily even <333 thats a great word im gonna use it now #thank u for the ask it reminded me to work on the fic …. im the type who procrastinates until last minute phshdhhd 😭😭#and then i end up finishing the fic around midnight and have to blindly look for a quote to use as the title 💔💔 agony.#THANK U FOR EXISTING i appreciate u i am spinning you around happily :33 #(trying my hardest not to drop u bc i have actual noodle arms but ill work out just for u <33)#ask tag ✩#mickey !! ✩

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pepprs · 9 months

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dont worry abt responding to my messages!! they can be little trinkets for u to keep forever if u wanna :)))

dear anon… how could i not respond to THESE!!!!!!!!!! 😭💗💗💗💗💗💗💗 you are the sweetest kindest most WONDERFUL soul. it is an honor to receive these beautiful letters and i hope you know how much i cherish each and every one. not just the words but the adventures you take me on and write up for the two of us!!! and the beauty and magic you help me to see in the world around me and the peace and love and love and love you conjure for me in moments when i cant find it or feel it so easy!!!! like idk i know i have no idea who you are outside of being dear anon and i only answer asks once in a blue moon but it truly means the world to me. TRULY.

your writing feels like all the best things, all the things i love most. like leaf piles in the fall and the pikmin bloom soundtrack (btw if you dont play that already i HIGHLY recommend it to you specifically, i think u would really like it and tbh you sending me these letters has the same vibe as my pikmin bringing me postcards from their adventures :"~DDDD!!! if you ever do join it please lmk i would LOVE to be friends and send you postcards and do adventures together!!!!) and frosting on cupcakes and twinkly dust motes in the sunlight and cumulus clouds and dogwood flowers and the way things made of glass refract rainbows and SUNLIGHT SUNLIGHT SUNLIGHT. and even that isnt cutting it. how magical it all is. like i wish i wasnt so exhausted so i could express it better but it truly is so... idk. NOSTALGIC! COZY! HOME!!!!!

so... in order to try to articulate it (and also show my thanks / return the favor / etc.), i am sending this letter along with a care package knitted with word and song and magic and light. enclosed please find:

wind chimes that sing like the sun hitting the lake (also i REALLY want to get a butterfly hair clip!!! i cant wear hair clips or anything else fancy in my hair bc of my mask headbands but id love to have one in case im ever able to wear it in the future 🥹)

a heart-shaped pebble from brighton, to add to your collection (btw i LOVE the part about how you lost them a long time ago but you love them so you remember what they look like. WAUGH. gut punch GUT PUNCH IN THE BEST WAY!!!!)

a mug for hot chocolate, so we can share some together when it gets cold again -- decorated with hand-painted stars in all colors!

a tiny needle to knit your sundust satchels -- like the kind youd find in pixie hollow or the tale of desperaux or something (also both things that have dear anon vibes to me and are also DEEPLY nostalgic for me!)

a recipe for starfait, with illustrations!! (also i LOVE that idea for a replacement for "tesscore"!! but i may end up using that for my personal tag on my undertale / deltarune blog instead bc its so perfect (and also im HONORED that u associate that with me 😭😭😭😭))

a crown and wand for you to wear to match the fairy queen mouse while you write the same kind of magic and comfort she brings!

a packet of magical flower seeds that sprout the most whimsical sweet-smelling flowers, with petals that are soft to the touch!

a hand-woven scarf in your favorite color threaded with shiny silver strands, like comets streaming through the sky (also i am SO late to say this but UNO REVERSE CARD re: your new years wish to me which is genuinely making me lumpthroated and teary eyed reading it again in AUGUST. you are the sweetest EVER. and also ive never played journey before but ive been interested in it for years!!! i'll have to check it out and/or watch a playthrough!)

a hummingbird sculpture on a long stick for you to plant in your garden among the flowers, to sing to them and to you! (also RE: your question about your vocal range -- it just means that you can cover a little over two octaves (the number after the letter is the octave it's in, and each octave is a span of c-d-e-f-g-a-b-c -- so your range starts at about halfway through the third octave and goes to halfway through the fifth!) i think your range is about the same as mine iirc so we can hum along with the hummingbird and all three follow each other's notes :"~D <3)

a golden acorn on a thread for you to wear as a necklace when we go to the bird tea party! (by the way, have you ever read the book ""until the last acorn "when the last acorn is found?" it's a BEAUTIFUL book and it made me cry reading it! i think you and the acorn people would get along very, very well!!)

a lantern made of jelly moonlight and silver foil stars (see: ilomilo chapter 4 :"~D) for you to carry on your walks through the dim nights (you can hang the stars in the sky, and they'll brighten the world and light at your touch!)

a copy of one of my favorite books of all time, "the ten thousand doors of january," which is so much about wedging cracks open into other worlds, and something i think you might like very much / resonate with too!!

a big, big hug.

dear anon: THANK YOU. for all these words and for being you. i dont know how i got so lucky to have you sending me these little trinkets but i will most CERTAINLY keep them forever. i hope you experience all the peace and love and love and love to infinity. may you always know and shine with the light you bring and the light you are.

#purrs #asks #dear anon #<- im making you a tag now!!! i can’t believe i didn’t have one already!!#tess answers asks 2023 #(i had to take screenshots of some of these bc they werent showing up in my desktop inbox for some reason? but... this officially #concludes my ask-answering spree for today! tysm to everyone who sent me an ask i love u all so so much <3 <3 <3 i may rb stuff a little #more before going to bed but... (preemptively) goodnight and sweet dreams 🫂💗💗💗💗#save #comfort #tesscore #(ALSO BTW: i completely forgot abt adding alt text to the posts where i put screenshots of asks (like this one) so i'll try to go back and #do that tmrrw after work!!)

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sweetchup · 3 years

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💌Love/Hate💌

Type: Pariston Hill x Reader

Prompts: Soulmate Au (Colorblind) + 7– Innocent/Corruption Kink

Author Note: OMG I am so so so sorry this took so long. I’m not sure what it was but my brain couldn’t write for Pariston. Like it was if the zodiacs took over and put it into a total shut down mode. It was insane. (ALSO Small warning, this is Pariston and, as expected, he’s an abusive dick)

(Valentine’s Day Masterlist)

When you had first accepted the job of being randomly assigned someone’s secretary, you hadn’t expected to be assigned to the CEO of a high end tech company. You mean, who in the world would have known that by just calling a flyer on a street corner would have led to working with someone so prestigious.

It almost sounded too good to be true!

….And, you wished you hadn’t jinxed yourself in that moment. The CEO of that high end tech company actually turned out to be only 21, having inherited the company from his father. He was not only a spoiled brat and a player but, my god, was he lazy. You were sure that if you hadn’t spent hours on the phone discussing ideas with his father and done all the paperwork for him, that the company would be in ruins before someone could say “We’re broke!”.

Though, no matter how hard you worked your ass off these past couple months, nothing could prepare you for this moment.

“Dear god someone help me…”

You and his father had told him many times over this week. On February 14 at noon, you have an important meeting with the Hunter Association. You can’t miss it.

But, of course, that lazy ass was running late. By 45 minutes to be exact.

“Miss (y/n), is Mr Avoli going to be showing up any time soon? It isn’t like him to be late.”

… And it surely didn’t help that you were standing in the meeting room, waiting for him with the Hunters Association's very own Zodiacs.

Shamefully, you turn to the doglike woman who had introduced herself as ‘Cheadle’ earlier and give an apologetic bow, “I-I deeply apologize. You see Mr Avoli's son, Hunter Avoli, recently took over the company. I reminded him constantly this past week about the meeting but I’m afraid he may have forgotten...”

“Oh that guy.” You hear the monkey zodiac ‘Saiyu’ spit out in disgust, “He is almost as bad as that dirt bag, Ging.”

“It’s not a problem Miss (y/n). I’ve met Hunter many times before so I’ve seen first hand how unprofessional he acts. This is clearly not your fault.” Cheadle reassures, giving you enough confidence to lift your head up from bowing to look at her as some of the Zodiacs complain in the background.

As you stare at the grayish colored woman, you can’t help but wonder what color she was wearing. Due to you still not having found your soulmate, you can only see the color of your soulmate’s eye color. Which, in your case, was brown. A chocolate brown to be exact.

And, usually dogs were brownish in color so you kind of wondered what color Miss Chealde chose instea—

“We are still waiting on the chairman and two other zodiacs so why don’t you take the chance to try and give Hunter a call.” Mizaistom, the ox zodiac, suggests suddenly.

“O-oh of course. Thank you very much Miss Cheadle, Mr Mizaistom. I’ll be very quick— Eep!”

Oh god why me?

Just as you made your way to the door to exit the room, someone on the other side had already swung it open. Making you, in pure surprise and shock, take a step backwards. Though, just like how your day is going so far, Luck truly didn’t seem to be on your side as you end up tripping on your own two feet and begin to fall backwards.

You expected to land hard on the cold tile floor in front of everyone, extremely embarrassing really, but instead you don’t. You still hit something firm and hard but… it was different. Actually, now that you think about it, you felt higher up than you were before…

“Ah, Ging this is why I said you shouldn’t barge into rooms so suddenly! You scared our poor guest!” A voice suddenly calls out from behind you, his breath slightly tickling the shell of your ear. Quickly, in surprise, you whip your head around to—

…Shit.

As your eyes lock with the male’s chocolate brown ones the room suddenly bursts into a flurry of color. Blues, reds, greens, maybe yellows? You honestly didn’t know the proper names for all the colors you were seeing for the first time. However, in all this chaos, you happened to know two things.

One, That you had just met your soulmate and Two,...

… it was none other than the Vice Chairman himself, Pariston Hill.

“Oh my! How unexpected!” Pariston chuckles out, causing what seems to be sparkles to pop out around him, “I never thought our guest here today would end up being my soulmate. Not at all!”

“I—“ “Shut up Rat!”

You freeze as something suddenly comes flying past your head. What the fuck...

“You have a soulmate? Not a Chance! Not a Chance! Not a Chance!”

“Quit joking.”

“I doubt the King Of Kickbacks would have an ordinary soulmate.”

It was as if a bomb had erupted in the room, everyone was in pure disbelief at what Pariston had just said, Suggested, he even had (Well everyone except Ging, of course). Hell, some of them haven’t even found their own soulmates yet. So, why did the heartless ass Rat get to have one?!

“I assure you, I’m speaking the truth. Why would I lie about something like this?”

We can think of many reasons…

“U-uh…” You suddenly speak out, slightly flinching as everyone’s attention turns to you, “He is telling the truth… I saw colors other than brown for the first time when we locked eyes.”

“See!” Pariston says happily, pulling you affectionately closer to him in his hold. As you are flustered by the act from the handsome man, he takes the chance to walk to what you believe is in the direction of an empty seat. However, you soon realize that wasn’t what he was intending as he walked right by it and leaves through the other door located in the room.

“Hey Rat!! Where do you think you are GOING!?!” The tigerlike man screeches out, storming through the door you two just left as well.

“Well, I’m going to spend time with my soulmate of course.” Pariston exclaims, his smile not even flinching as bloodlust from the other zodiacs creeps out from the room.

“As if I—“ Suddenly, a loud chuckle behind you rings out, cutting Kanzai off.

“C-Chairman Netero!” You squeak out in surprise at the older man. Oh god, what a disaster. As someone trying to make a deal to him, this looks bad. So bad.

“My, what a twist!” The Chairman rings out, stroking his beard as he thinks as he walks past you two. “Hmm… You and (y/n) can be excused from today’s meeting, Pariston.”

“B-But, Chairman!” Kanzai rebuts. Soon shutting up however as the chairman grabs onto the collar of his jersey.

“It only makes sense to give them alone time, Kanzai. We will just call Mr Aloisi for the meeting instead of having (y/n) give it to us.” Netero explains, giving you a small wink as he drags Kanzai as if he was some kitty cat back into the meeting room.

What a strange group…

As you sit there stunned at everything that has happened so far, you don’t realize Pariston has already begun walking again. It takes you a while to realize as well, precisely the loud sound of the door of his private office being closed. He must have walked pretty fast…

“A-ah. Umm you can put me down now.” You mumble out to the… Blonde man (unable to tell if that was the correct color).

“Hmm. What was that?” Pariston asks, as if he didn’t quite hear you from before.

“Oh. I was wondering if you could put me down.” You tell him again. Shit, the way you said that came out bad. “I-I mean I’m really appreciative of you saving me but you are likely getting tired of holding me and I can walk on my own.”

“Oh!”

You expected at that exclamation that Pariston would instantly put you down to the floor, but instead he walks over to his deck and places you down in front of that. Odd, but you don’t question the sparkly man.

Speaking of odd, as you looked around the room, you realized it was really cold in here. Much colder than the conference room and hallway. God, what a bad day to wear a skirt but no tights. Especially those insulated ones you recently bought.

“Are you Cold?” Pariston suddenly voices up, causing you to turn behind you to look at him. He still hadn’t moved from his spot right behind you.

“A-ah yes I am. I don’t want to be a bother but could you possibly turn it down a couple of notches?” You ask, taking a step back a little to give a little bit of space between you two.

“I’m afraid I can’t. My thermostat broke this morning.” Pariston exclaims, his smile turning into a bit of a frown. However, that didn’t last long as he soon had a full blown out smile again. “But, I do have my jacket that I wore to work this morning. It should be… Ah! There it is! Right on the seat of my chair if you want to grab it.”

“Oh.. thank you.” You give Pariston a small smile before leaning over the desk to grab the brown coat.

You couldn’t wrap your head around it but for some odd reason you didn’t feel fully comfortable around him. Which was even weirder because you didn’t understand what was causing it. Shouldn’t you naturally feel comfortable around your soulmate?

Perhaps, you just needed to get to know him better. That’s likely it. Your just nervous since he was supposed to be your clien—

“Ah!” You let out a yelp as you feel pressure and sharp pain in your lower regions. At first, you thought it was perhaps a weird cramp or something like that. However, once you fully grasped what you were feeling, you realized you were just trying to make yourself believe that.

“Oh whoops! Tight. Tight. That must have hurt.” Pariston chuckles out, rocking his hips back and forth as his eyes watched his cock disappear and reappear out of your hole. Harshly letting go of the strap of your panties that he had pulled aside to watch as an ever so slight bit of blood comes out in your slick. Delighted to see such results.

“P-Pariston. Please be gentle.” You gasp out, turning yourself by your waist to place a hand on the man’s chest. Ever so slightly fisting the fabric of his suit when he suddenly gave a really hard thrust. “Let’s slow down… too soon…”

“How come? I thought you said you were grateful to me right?” Pariston teased out, pulling your hand off his suit as well as pushing your front down against the desk. Making it so you were trapped underneath him.

“I-I am but—“ “Shh… I’m only taking my reward!”

However, even with your constant pleas for him to be slower, gentler, Pariston continued his actions. Watching you grow more and more wet as that uncomfortable burning sensation suddenly turned into pure ecstasy.

It was perfect…

Pressed down against the desk, unable to move as you were essentially being taken advantage of by him. Your very own soulmate.

It was embarrassing, agonizing and traumatizing.

Surely, you hated him. You despised him.

Having waited long enough, Pariston decided to finally pull out and flip you over so he could see you and the results of his hard work. “Now, Now my dear. It’s not so—“

Pariston feels himself blink a couple of times.

Oh… So, you were one of those types huh?

It was if you were some humanized version of a golden retriever. Your eyes that were supposed filled with terror or hatred were still as sparkly and innocent before you began. You were loyal to him to a fault and he honestly doubted you could bring it in your heart to even hate him.

It was annoying but it wasn’t that big of a problem. He could always break you in other ways.

However, that’s not exactly what was troubling him right now.

Fluttering? Or, Bubbles?

Whatever it was, he didn’t understand why he was feeling this sort of way. Especially seeing you look at him like that. With that love filled look…

“Pariston…” You mumble out, your voice slightly slurred. “Are you okay? Are you done?”

Are you okay?

Those three words ring in Pariston’s head. Eventually, causing him to break his composure and let out a light laugh.

“Aw. Did I leave you high and dry? Here I’ll fix that.” Pariston calls out. A slight shiver going up his spine as he hears you let out a small moan as he slips back into your dripping cunt.

You know what, he didn’t care how strange you were making him feeling.

Whether you looked at him with loved dazed eyes…

Or cried out how much you hated him with those kissable lips of yours.

Either way, he would enjoy every bit of playing with you. You had the rest of your miserable lives to try it out after all.

#hxh #hunter x hunter #pariston #pariston hill #pariston x reader #pariston hill x reader #hxh pariston

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chanyoungies · 3 years

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bye bye 2020, hello 2021 !!

happy new year everyone!! there’s a lot of people i want to thank for making last year so much more bearable so i tried writing some messages for some of my dearest mutuals this year as well!! (keyword tried because i absolutely cannot put my feelings and thoughts into words. i love you all though and thank you so so so much!!!)

@angelhyunjin : angi!! i know you’re not on here anymore (actually i just found out . i ran to twt to find u as quick as i could!!) but it felt weird not?? putting you on here because you WERE a big part of my year!! i was always excited to chat with you and i rlly rlly loved (still do) seeing your art and your dance covers i can’t believe how talented at both you are!! you are really really lovely and even if it’s been a while i hope you know i still think of you and hope you’re doing well!! this year might have been hard but i hope 2021 will be much nicer to you because you definitely deserve it!! i love you!!

@cinanamon : stephie!! i think we haven’t talked in a while until we started suddenly bonding over minho but all is well that ends well because now we are the founders of a minho cult and that’s all i could hope for in life i think! we don’t talk that much but seeing your tags in all the minho posts is always a TIME i absolutely love reading them! thank you for being there to lose it over minho, always, but also for being there in general! you are really sweet and i do love to talk to u!! i also know you are a really good writer so i hope 2021 brings you lots of inspiration to write more!! (and i’ll finally catch up on your fics too! hehe) happy new year!!

@cocogoat : puppy !! i think we haven’t been friends for long actually and that sounds fake because that would mean there was a time i didn’t instinctively check your blog when i woke up in the morning (or the evening let’s be real)?? you are so! adorable and for what!!!!!! i really do love seeing you pop up in my phone notifs and reading your posts even if i dont have any idea what they’re saying half of the time unless it’s dgrp (i cannot believe i have a dgrp friend now. amazing i think i won) u are so funny and so cute and i’m really glad i got to know you because!! you’re such a nice friend that i! love! times can be hard but i hope 2021 is gentle with you because that is! what! you deserve! gentle pats and tight hugs! (maybe that’s why i associate ab6ix’s heaven with you it’s the gentle vibes) <3

@glossiers : miss bri i am in love w u that’s it. no i’m kidding that’s not it i have much more to say . i am in lov w u though #brillie2k21 i think. i think it’s been a surprisingly short time since we’ve actually started talking?? which is kinda crazy if u ask me because?? how the hell did i live my life without screaming BRIIIII whenever i see u on the dash like for real how . that sounds like a life so empty like. that would rlly be missing . something?? anyways u are a dear dear friend that i really really love and i’m sure you know that but i will keep saying it anyway! i’m sure i’m pretty annoying so thanks for putting up with me! and for talking to me! i feel like i’ve said it before but! you are a delight to see on the dash and i lovlovlov talking to u (and sending u pics of my cats, thank u for appreciating them). i still cannot believe u managed to convince yourself i was a hyeongjun stan though. hope i can be convincing enough to clear that up and leave no doubts in your brain this year. anyways i love you and i hope we can continue to be friends and talk even MORE this year!!!!!! happy new year ilu <3

@hwacinth : miss dia my sweet sweet floral nymph real life shirayuki and queen of urls! i am? so so so so so glad that we are friends you literally have my heart it is YOURS i can’t even try to claim it back!! you literally are shirayuki i don’t even know how to elaborate i think it’s just self-explanatory but you are just. such a sweet little sunshine!! it’s like you bring spring everywhere you go!! we could be in a middle of a metaphorical storm but when you appear the skies clear up and flowers bloom wherever you step and i cannot help but smile when i see you online!! thank you so so much for being my little ray of sunshine in these tough times! i hope to see even more of your posts this year!! don’t hesitate to live blog anything you watch in my dms if you feel like you’re posting too much (but i hope you never feel that way because you’re not . love seeing u live post it is absolutely amazing i won’t ever get tired of it)!! happy new year and i love you!! ps only 1 more hour until your birthday HAPPY BIRTHDAY DIA ILUUU <3 I HOPE YOU CAN HAVE A WONDERFUL ONE!! IM SENDING YOU CAKE TELEPATHICALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

@hwisgf : sorinaaaa! happy new year!! we don’t talk that much but it is always nice seeing you around! you are vv sweet and i really appreciate that, thank you for taking the time to talk to me sometimes!! you are also probably my only fantasy mutual?? which is terrible on one side because i think everyone should stan sf9 but that’s besides the point . i really do love the fact that i at least have u to talk to abt sf9 if need and i LOVE seeing u in love with hwi it is absolutely amazing. i am forever grateful for all the free hwi pics days too!! <3 i hope 2021 can be a year full of happiness for you!! (also that is also besides the point but @ fnc i want an sf9 cb announcement) ILY!! (and so does hwi)

@inkigayeo : miss vivi galaxy brain happy new year!! we only started talking recently but u do have my heart already!! i hope this year treats you well and that we can get to know each other more and be friends hehe!!!! <3 (my other wish is for u to stop breaking my heart with those fake titles. please . why should san NOT come back explain yourself .)

@jeongcheols : mimi . mimi mimi mimi im literally typing this as u are listening to that ten n dj stage ok now it’s kai ok anyways . ANYWAYS i am loving your sm concert live commentary . criminal is sounding amazing taemin is insane indeed (yes i took a break before coming back to writing this) i truly don’t know what to say?? n i have to keep watching the time so that i can scream HAPPY NEW YEAR into the mic in 14 minutes. but like?? i love you?? like. like for real i don’t know what i would’ve done without you?? also it’s weird writing this for tumblr instead of just in your messages (also i can’t focus with idea playing. idea soty). and i mean. you technically know all of this but like?? i can’t believe we’ve known each other for so long but also such a short time at the same time like. what. thank you for being my bestestest friend and my soulmat i don’t think i would’ve been able to remain sane this year (and last year too honestly) if it wasn’t for you?? thank you for always listening to my incoherent rants and i’m always so sorry for spamming you while you’re asleep i know you must wake up to like 150+ messages with absolutely no connection between them and they’re all just so random i truly don’t know how you manage to not get annoyed and to just stay with me all this time i’m- getting emotional. you had a terrible year, i know it! i really do!! and while it might not be looking too bright right now, i hope the universe hears me and treats you much better in 2021 because!! you deserve so much more!! you deserve the world, really!!! i love you!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (i would write more really but like what is there to say literally i’m just (your emoji)) i love you for real;;

@nakyngs : ele <3 happy new year!!!!!! we haven’t talked much this year but i do think of u a lot daily i hope you know that!! and i love u a lot! even if i still need to catch up on all your aus </3 i hope 2021 can be a fun and stress-free year for you!! and we should catch up sometime too!! ps i hope your fish are ok

@ncityzen : dear spring fairy!! i already sent you a new year’s message earlier today like what. 6 hours ago but! once again!! i really do hope you can leave the hard times behind in 2020 and only get the best things possible this new year!! i’m always very happy to see you appear on my dash and curious to see your life updates and your random literature-related mini-rants in the tags they are always very interesting to see!! so! hoping to see even more of that this year <3 i hope you know that i love you and i really care about you!!

@woojjongs : MISS IRI! i am screaming this very loud so hopefully u can hear me all the way in canada! okay i had to leave this one for last because i?? don’t really know how to start i’m just a pink glittery puddle with lil hearts flowing in it that is how i feel towards u right now . how does one think and how does one write down their thoughts coherently give me a second. this is going to be a mess maybe u shouldn’t read it (‘accidentally’ forgets to tag u). just know that i decided to play txt’s wishlist to write this and u might be confused by that but all u need to know is that it means i love you very much. OKAY so miss iri you are . such a wonderful pal i truly don’t know what i would’ve done without you like . it would feel so weird not seeing you around tumblr would be so so so so empty i don’t even think you can begin to imagine how empty i’d feel without you around here ksdjbskbds i absolutely adore you but we already knew that. i’m always super excited to see your gifsets and your nonsense!! be it your love for woojong or u missing lim jimin (play m.. 🔪) or your snoo brainrot or hating literally anyone on smtm or whatever else it might be i love it all!! you are so cute and adorable and talented and sweet and funny i cannot believe you also happen to be the prettiest person on earth too. how does that feel! anyways i love you so so so so so much? i keep telling you to hold back from committing crimes but i absolutely WOULD commit a crime for u i really do adore you!! i mean . how many groups did u make me stan . (ok actually i don’t think there’s that many. but STILL) i know i can be super annoying but thank u for taking the time to chat with me nonetheless!! i’m all over the place but . there’s times i come online literally just to check your blog nothing else! i hope we can continue to be friends this year too n perhaps talk more (or the same amount idk please tell me off when i’m too annoying)!! happy new year, i hope it holds wonderful things in store for u!!!!!! and we really are starting off great since victon comeback is approaching <3 (this got way too long i’m so sorry i’ll cut it off now before i write 10 pages)

@xiaocity : miss siya hello hello hello first of all i’m just so very glad that you’re back i l o v e you!!! i love seeing you around be it your gifs or your text posts which yes. i cannot properly understand half of the time but google is my best friend after all! you’re such a wonderful person and i’m just?? really glad to have you around like?? you feel kind of like a cousin i don’t always get to see but am always excited to talk to when i can? this might not make sense but. you are vvv cool and talented and funny and feel very like. reliable? i feel like i am not making any sense so like ignore me. what i’m saying is i really really like you a whole lot and i really hope we can talk even more in 2021!! happy new year, i hope it’s a wonderful one for you!!

@yunwoo : miss anna we haven’t been moots for that long and we haven’t talked much but u are vvv cute and i hope we can become (better) pals this year!! i’m looking forward to seeing u on the dash more often, hopefully!! happy new year <3

#happy new year everyone i love you all;;;; thank you again!! hope 2021 treats you all nicely!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#there's like a few mutuals i rlly do appreciate but didn't really have much to say to/abt because we haven't really . talked #i really do love all of you though!!!!!!!!!!;;;;;

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kyunsies · 4 years

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things i love + appreciate about my closest moots 💖 (obviously no particular order bc you all hold such a special place in my heart)

i was going to wait and post this when i hit 400 followers but that has passed and i wasn't ready in time and i didn’t really know when to post this ;; so i’m just going to do it now to remind everyone that it is truly a blessing to be here in your presence :) i don’t want to get mushy ALREADY sdlkfjsd but pls know you all mean so much to me <33

@theyoungflexer — my person, my rock, chelle you’re super special!! we have such a quirky relationship that somehow works extremely well; idk how but i had this feeling from the moment we spoke with each other i was like “omg this gal is so funky and sweet!!” i was really excited to get to know you, and we’ve talked everyday without FAIL since we became moots :) v grateful for you chelle, you’re my home girl!! (even tho we live across the states hehe) 💘💗 also i just respect you on so many levels like the way you just attend one of the most amazing colleges in the US and is thriving?? not to mention your equally as smart brother also going to an amazing college too???????? speechless. ALSO BIG SHOUT OUT BC you are also the reason for inspiring me to start giffing so,,,,,,literally wouldn’t be here without you GOD chelle i’m so mushy for you :’((((

@softhyungkyun — 1/2 of my mom friends!!! my monmomma, my calming energy in this chaotic world!! victoria, my sweet vic how i love u so!! not to mention the BEST canadabebe around 😘 truly don’t know what i would do without you hun!! do u know how special u are to me?? how much i loved ur lil bunny pics whenever u went on a run; your CONSTANT surveillance of my many typos; and most importantly your scalding of me whenever i show my ~alter ego nasty mädch who is a simp for kyun~ (huh?? who said that, certainly not me!!) i literally look up to you in so many ways, and i’m glad i have someone like you in my life 💗💘💖

@ckyunoirs — you’ve all seen it coming but my actual soulmate!! the best kyun soulmate ever 🥺 i honestly can’t remember how we became moots LOL but i just know i thought you seemed like an absolute sweetheart (which you are) and i was so nervous to talk to you!! i was like “ah omg she has so many anons and everyone associates her w kyun i would like to be at that level” but look at us now!!! we really do share the same (thirsting for kyun always 🤝) braincell and i love that i can tell you what’s on my mind always!! you are such a nurturing soul suni, always stressing how important it is to take care of ourselves 🤧 angel behavior i think!! i don’t even have to elaborate anymore bc i think (i hope) you know truly how much you mean to me suni!!!!! thank you for being such a great friend <33

@memehyungwon — nessa!!! my love whom i get extremely excited about whenever i see your name pop up in my inbox 🥺🥺 get yourself a nessa!!!! so sweet, so supportive, so kind, and just all around LOVELY LOVELY LOVELY!! the cutest, my emotional support bub really 💘💗💖💓💞 so much love for you, plus you’re a multi-talented queen with the moodboards + edits like hello you are LEGENDARY!!! also a multistan extraordinaire, what more could u ask for?? aaaand you call me your “cariño mio” like.......,,shush i’m sobbing just thinking of it 🥺

@pansynight — i think ezra is a fallen angel I SAID IT!!! srsly THE most supportive, trustworthy, and down to earth person in the whole wide world. such a hard worker i mean moodboards, audio edits, writing on the side sometimes, AND gifmaking???????? incredible!!! and is just as a hopeless romantic as i am (cue us crying over how much we love Love together,,,,,i need a moment 😭)!! one friend who i can feel totally comfortable + stripped down with 💙💙 did i already say supportive bc ezra is the Most Supportive Bub if you didn’t already catch that 🥺

@sohcean — bee!!!! a fairly recent moot but one i love very much nonetheless!!!! i looked up to you a lot akdbdjdkjdb like you were one of my “it” monsta x blogs imo hehe but i remember i tagged you in a post where an anon asked me who my fav blogs were and 🥺🥺 you sent me an ask something along the lines of “ty v much i’m glad we’re moots now!!” AND WHEN I TELL YOU!!! i was crying 😭😭😭 anyways, always checks in on me once in a while and you’re always super duper sweet and caring (and thank you for submitting sweet kyun pics occasionally; they are SO desperately needed);; plus you are so extremely eloquent with your writing -- when you post something particularly long i kinda just space out into dreamland bc you just take me to another place with your words omg *chefs kiss* love ya hun!!! 💙💜💙💜💙

@burnitupmp3 — ah ADRY!!! honestly i was really scared to talk to you too for some reason DJFLSDJ but i think that’s bc you’re so extremely hilarious :’) but now that we are certified CLINGMATES 🥺 i literally thank my lucky stars for you everyday :( always and i mean ALWAYS supporting not only me but all of your other moots too ITS SO AMAZING TO SEE!!!!!! never being shy and always starting a conversation with everyone like i’m starting to get the feeling that maybe you DO in fact know every monbebe on this site HEHE but!!!!! grateful for you, if there is one singular constant on tumblr it's you and you're humor, kindness, individuality 💘💗 1/3 of my joobebes, but my ONLY rujoobebe :’) alSO TY FOR FEEDING ME J.SEPH CONTENT <33

@minhyukie — LISTEN if you don’t follow amy you’re missing oUT!!!! but srsly amy i’m going to get really mushy on you jfsdlkfj 🥺🥺 i’ve been following you ever since i made this blog in january (obvi bc u make High Quality content) and i just need to get this off my chest but when u popped in my messages telling me what i was doing wrong in ps about the smart object thing I LITERALLY SCREAMED I JUMPED OUT OF MY SEAT I MESSAGED @theyoungflexer AND WAS LIKE OMG OMG OMG AMY JUST TALKED TO ME!!!!!!!!! jeez like i was so embarrassingly excited :’D !!! man, am i SO happy we are moots <33 the best minbebe around, always providing me with advice and so many resources,,,not to mention we kinda (??) live relatively close-ish to each other so that’s also very cool LOL but srsly!!! amy you are such a backbone for the mbb community here and i look up to you SO much,,,smooches to u 💘💗

@leejooheons — aj!!! 2/3 of my joobebes!!! we are only recently moots but much like amy, i’ve been following you since the beginning of my blog’s existence!! gosh i look up to you in sooooo many ways and again LIKE AMY when i finally found the courage to talk to you i kinda freaked out when you responded LOL !! your gifs are absolutely AMAZING STUNNNG WONDERFUL; you inspire me to really improve my skills, and you always always ALWAYS give me such helpful advice all the time when i don’t even ask for it :( if anything i can't imagine how annoying it is to see me complain about all of my ps troubles but you still take time out of your day to always give me the best tips ever. and for that??? i’m SUPER grateful for all that you do for not only me but for monbebe tumblr too !!! 💘💗

@chaelight — fern!! my other resourceful monbebe moot 🥺 even though we don’t talk all the time, you, like aj, are always providing me with such amazing content advice!!! seriously idk why you all are so incredibly nice to me it’s so touching 😭 and just like bee, you also give me such a calming vibe; you’re just an overall delight to see on my dash because your content is SO well thought out too <33 love you fern!!

@joosgf — lulu!!! 3/3 of my joobebes who also takes the time to tag me in kyun content 🥺 we do not message often but :( omg you’re such a freaking cutie :( i knew i wanted to be your friend when i found your blog bc 1) everyone loves u and 2) you are so incredibly nice <33 i really hope we get to grow closer in the future!! you are so supportive even though we aren't close, and just know that you can always come to me for anything!! also i just love your adoration for our joober it’s SO SWEET, i love to see you geek about him bc it really is the cutest thing <33

@haoranghae — jill!!!!!!! my eastern standard time pal!!!!!!! <33 honestly i think you're the only moot where i DONT have to think about you being asleep while i’m up bc i know we’re on the same time schedule :’) my multifandom buddy who shares my love for victon and honestly a lot of other groups too!! surprisingly we don’t message often but like, i feel like when we DO talk we always pick up where we left off, if that makes sense? i always feel at home talking with you <33 and you’re so freaking SUPPORTIVE always saying nice things and going out of your way once in a while to pop in the inbox!! jill dear you are such a joy, thank you for being you 🥺

@morkyun — carly my sweet angel!!! one of my most precious fellow kyunbebes!!!! idk why you’re so darn SWEET TO ME!! just the sweetest; always asking how i’m doing, always crying over changkyun with me, always participating in ask games sdkjflskdfjslkf how can i ask for anything more than you?? super DUPER grateful to have u in my life, literally such a blessing <33 AND U HAVE ME IN YOUR BIO <33 IM MELTING PLS I FREAKING LOVE U!!!

@hohyuk — everyone LISTEN UP AS A TALK ABOUT ONE OF MY FAVORITE PEOPLE IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD!!!!!! my ma, 2/2 of the mom friends!! you aren’t as active as you were when i first started to talk to you (bc u are a wonderful working WOMAN) but gosh, you made such an impact on me ma :( you are such a caring and nurturing person like the only way i can describe you is motherly :( i remember we would always talk about our days + weekends bc we never really messaged a lot HOWEVER we would always touch base at the end of the week and catch up!! although we don’t talk that often anymore, i want you to know that you will always have a special place in my heart for being exceptionally kind to me 💘💗 and for that i am forever thankful for you ma!! love you!!

@kihyunsgf — kass my cutie patootie!!! we have been moots for a long time it feels!! ( i mean long for me since i’ve one been here since january lol) but you are such an amazing monbebe friend!!! we don’t really private message each other but it seems like we always participate in each other’s ask games so it’s always fun to get to know a little bit more about each other every time we ask questions!! you always reblog not only my work, but every other content creator moots’ works too and i just think you are an extremely supportive friend in general <33 thank you for always being so approachable and warm, and i hope we only grow closer as time goes on 💘💗

@kkyuns — okay aminah OMG so,,,,,,,,,idk if you even want me to consider you a moot yet or anything but 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 can i pls be your moot LOL srsly 🥺🥺🥺🥺 and if you don’t feel comfortable that’s okay and u can just consider this an appreciation post dksfjslkdjf but!!!!!! aminah i’ve already told you i’ve sent you so many asks anonymously and i only recently found the courage and come off bc i feel really comfortable whenever i talk to you <33 literally the KINDEST soul in the entire world;; you might not answer asks quickly ALL the time but you always find a way to make time for the people who look up to you and honestly?? that inspires me to be a kinder more gentler person!! my FELLOW NURSING GAL working your lil BOOTY off, a queen really :’) and not to mention one of the most TALENTED mbb gif makers on the entire planet i’m not even stretching that i truly mean it angel <33 thank u for making me (and others ofc) feel incredibly appreciated, and thank you for being a blessing to mbb tumblr :D

@changkynie — sian angel!!!! you have been with me since the beginning of this blog it seems like!!! thank you for always being my secretive cheerleader on my blog, i really adore you for that! you are such a cutie and you ALWAYS make time to send in little messages to both me and our lil family on my blog!! it’s really the sweetest thing; you are truly SUCH blessing and i love waking up/falling asleep to your kind words <33 together forever bub i think <33

@tsunpan (idk which blog you’re comfortable w me tagging so i’ll just do this one dsjfsjdf)—RATCH!!!!!!! i know a lot of ppl on your blog don’t know your name (and oddly enough i’ve never asked either bc i thought u wanted to be secretive LMAO) but then you plugged your twitter @ a while ago and u said it had your name there HEHE SO!!!!!!! i’ll keep it private :) but HOLY CRAP!! my actual first moot on here :( like my FIRST first moot ever :( says i’ve been following you for 8 FREAKING MONTHS!!!!!!!! and wow look how far we’ve come <33 i know i don’t message u as often as a should but just know i cherish this friendship like my life depends on it skdfjlksdjf and thank you for always indulging me with you’re changkyun writings (shout OUT to safekeeping kyun UGH my heart) + also sharing my love for mr. park junhee + ALSO being my astrology guru WOW u really do it all <33 ;; every time i message you i’m always like wow i wish i were as carefree and funny as my gal !! love you to the moon and back dear, thank you for putting up with me 💘💗💖💓💞

@monpabebe —lastly but CERTAINLY not least is my dear RIKA!!!!! again i have this running theme of being scared of the ppl i love LMAO but yes rika i’ve been following you too for a very very long time (i have actually sent u some anonymous stuff too hehe) but i think i fINALLY revealed myself when u mentioned your height!! SHORTBEBES OUT HERE PROTECTING EACH OTHER <33 but on a serious note, you are amazing :( i’m so glad i came out of my shell to finally talk to you; thank you for supporting my work, it means the absolute WORLD to me and thank you for also being a backbone here on monbebe tumblr as well :) i love seeing your interactions with your anons, it always puts a smile on my face 💘💗💖💓💞 whether you're arguing about tomatoes, geeking over shownu, or just giving your opinion on everything monsta x related, i always look up to you 🥺🥺🥺🥺 i know i don’t really talk to you often (bc i’m still a lil intimidated IM SORRY skdfjksd) but i would love for our lil friendship to bloom in the future rika!! :)

#mädch rambles #musHY POST omg but :') i just love u all so much idk #idk if this is weird like im sorry if youre uncomfortable w this sort of thing but idk when i reached 400 it just hit me #like wow ppl appreciate my mediocre content + are growing with me :)#PHEW #my sweet MOOTS <33

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madfantasy · 4 years

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hii! sorry if you've answered this before, but how did you find your own art style? it's nothing like i've seen before, very dream-like (: i feel like with so many artists out there it can be hard to find one's own style but yours is truly unique. if it's not too much to ask, do you still have any of your first drawings? thank you 💕💕

(Oh & I'm sorry if I have answered it before, I didn't find anything on my blog so woop here comes my blaber)

Hello dear!

Thank you so much, you flatter me and my bit-som of art-som, heh. Specially that you have called it dream like— cuz 1/4 of my creations does come from my dreams. I even had a dream about Severus a couple of days ago- was explaining to him the concept of gestures in smartphones, I told him it's like pulling down a scroll, to get the notifications, lol.

Before I start side-tracking too much, yes- I can't say I do know how it happens, I guess I wasn't on the base of looking for an art style for myself, or ever considered myself an artist— or a real one? Idk. The idea of having an 'art style' doesn't register with me so I'm possibly always confused what to make of it.

I mean, I didn't go into art for art's sake. I don't enjoy beauty just for beauty's sake. It has to have a meaning, purpose, hidden dilemma you need to solve just by looking deeper; is it speaking to me, or am I speaking for it?

My only concern since the beginning of time of Mani apparating this earth and what got them into drawing anyway is: telling the story as best as possible.

I was drawing before I learned speaking. It was my instinctive language. I had something to say? Illustrated it on a piece of paper to show.

Everything I see in my surroundings or mostly in mind, I had a story to tell about. So I didn't even consider that I was making art.

I remember when I developed enough cells to be aware- I started trying to copy or capture the basics of family members, making stories about them, also games or shows I played; I drew Crash bandicoot, driving into a cliff because he was hated by his family, Tiny wearing an abaya. Pink panther cuz how tall he was weirded me out in a fascinating way, Tarzan and his special muscles, a story about an abused squid lady that eventually turn into a mermaid, a guy turning into a hero coz of some near death experience.. mmm stories about my favourite stuffed rabbit CeCe Bobo— probably the only innocent adventures I drew as a child— I wanted so badly to make them into a video game, having their parents fall into a pit of flames, heh.

And because I had daily TV episodes in my brain of whatever to occupy me from unsanitary real life; I associated with many people I love to see materlized; my characters. So I had to try & draw them exactly how they look/feel, and that's what my art slowly developed based on; is this guy the way I seen and felt him look like? If not, try other ways.

At first, I drew them with literal basic shapes, like a character would have a square face, and another heart, and if I couldn't draw circle, I used my pencil sharpener that was shaped as a circle. A method still I use to differentiate my characters (without the pencil sharpener lol)

Later, since my characters have generally my favourite things, or things I enjoy, things I appreciate— basically things from me directly or from my choices, conscious they were or not—had them chopped and scattered between the lot of them. And to learn how to do some favourite factors of them is what drives my art style I suppose. I knew I didn't want it realistic, but I also didn't want it unreal. What makes art real? That's probably the always questions I face.

Ofc, I was face with so many problems to deteriorate my passion for drawing. Like, not being allowed to draw in the first place. I had wait till everyone is gone or occupied, had to always look over my shoulder and must constantly hide every inkling of any art making, and act like the project I'm making is for school, and draw in breakfast breaks at school. I used to draw under my blanket and store my art between my books or under my pillow (never related to anything so hard like when Harry was studying magic and Dursley keeps checking on him, honestly heh). Either all that or I get the whip.

Or being told what's the point of having a style like that while everybody obviously enjoys popular styles like anime or cartoon? Why don't I draw like the popular to get noticed? I don't know how to draw anime or cartoon even if I tried. It will just show as my art style, no? Exactly like speaking two different languages with the same letters.

Or like the idea of strictly sticking to gendering things while the idea never occurred to me. The base line of how men has to be ugly and women pretty. My motto is showing beauty in everything, even in scary or messed up things hehe. But I had to consent to making my guys 'ugly' as possible to continue drawing, and if u notice a line on their throats, that's one other thing I had to do, wasn’t allowed to draw girls either. And I wasn't happy with any of that at all.

But I was able to win my right to draw anytime I like in recent years, and able to draw how I like how I use digital means. So it got better heh.

And no it's not too much, if anything, it was took me on a dusty beautiful trip of nostalgia, I thank you for it. Sadly I don't have my first drawings, and I do treasure them but they all been tossed, torn and burned before me over the years, heh.

The oldest thing I got is this, a comic made, was 11 years old I think:

Medo, a guy so beautiful that he was forced to work as a femal model, concept that felt the best to me, heh. Even tho I was in no contact with the outsider world.

He is my first solid character and I made endless comics of him.

He's develop into this -dated 2014- , he's fairy sentinel.

And I found few of my old or first time drawing them pics of the main characters in my stories, I'd love to share:

Juicy and X-bi— second ones I made. But these drawings are maybe 2 or 3 years after I made them

I know I said that lots, but x-bi was a mask wearing imaginary friend I translated into X-bi. He has almost always cold hands so I used to put my skin on cold metallic surface and imagine it his hands trying to ease the pain.

And since I had no audience home, my stuff showed at school as i drew alone, always with various replies of 'its good, but'

Juicy got me in trouble with a teacher, by a careless student that was browsing my drawings In front of them, and I was classified as mentally deranged and need help for not drawing the usual princes and white knight.

Fernando and Carlos are also old characters that expressed romance in everything they do, so when I had a drawing of them Carlos tending to a fevered Ferry, and it was snatched from me, everyone considering it intimacy and I had to punch my way through them to get it back. Being called perverted and sick in the process, even tho all they talk to me about is marriage and the process of making babies. One of them literally told me on random occasion that their heart was like a ten story building for rent, there's always someone new in and out.

Carlos is Fernando's soul guardian💛

I created General Pumbkin in school! expressing fashion in strictness with my fav hooked nose!

Axel was my joy in everything, and the most common character I got beat up for, for being girly. I don't draw him too much anymore but seeing him again made me auto happy , hes all about giving loff, darling hehe

Candy, a less brain developed babyy

Brain and Pain, my sibs fav characters from my bag, heh

And Sabine was said to me that he should be a girl to be that scared in a scary story, his story is like dark and twisted fairytales vibe that I love dearly. I'm trying to continue writing his story.

Despite whatever, I love doing art, I have to. It what gives me soul juice heh.

And thank you for sticking on my prolonged answer. I hope I didn't bore too much, I'm flooded with memories happy and bad, and they are all okay. It made me feel passionate again, so thank you for the opportunity 🙏

1.5.2020

#sadttitude #my art #oc #drawing journey #personal #abuse #tw

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veryfineday · 3 years

Text

Saturday 23 April 1825

6 5/60

10 3/4

.. [Anne’s period]

From 7 3/4 to 10 10/60 wrote the few last lines of the 1st end, the whole of the 2nd a great deal under the seal, all very small and close, and crossed the 1st page of my letter (began on wednesday part written on Thursday and finished this morning) to ‘madame madame Barlow, Quai Voltaire no.15, Paris’, all which read over, wafered, and directed, and gave for George to take to the post-office –

I have had no time to make extracts but it is very affectionate say she will perhaps ssee me again before the all off[er]ed two years are expired write as if having no wish but to make her my wife §§ yet say she knows ‘the hard necessity of circumstance that clings around me now’ bid her do what is best for her own interest and for Janes § for her sake I can forget to be selfish nay more than this abhor thought bid her ‘not sacrifice a certain good for the upncertain prospect of making happy one whose affections she had gained forever but whose hopes of happiness had waked not from their sleep of years till roused by you to live and tremble once again’ § – all this brought on by my saying I had been taken by surprise altogether tho I ought not to have been by the reappearance of her ‘old beau’ that is Mr William Bell § said I had not the same feeling of repugnance towards him as Mr Hancock between whom to again use her aunts words il nya pas de choix in point of gentility Mrs H[ancock] nothing beyond her bright grates in bread street but bade her not atten[d] to me but make other inquiries said I did not mean to reflect on her taste she had seen Mr H[ancock] ‘in ignorance and at Place Vendome two reasons taken conjointly quite enough to excuse the whole thing’ –

she would not ruin me in postage – if her letters cost no more than now and she write regularly every fortnight of her life, they would only cost 47 shillings and 8 d.pence a year a sum far greater than which I should save by the habits of economy her regard had taught me – why did she not marK the little volumes? § Rousseaus Nouvelle Heloise she herself was the only one to whom I would give did she think I could now make such presents to others perhaps she would soon become what she was pleased to call ‘more rational’ without much effort ‘you have taught me much untaught before and surely I must strangely learn that hardest science to forget [wh]ere I can associate another with those sentiments which you have chastened and refined there is a little sacred record in my memory that would star t up into life against me’ were I to give these too interesting volume to any other than herself – had before all this bidden her not tell me any more of her being an injury to my future prospects etc. etc. § they we were good enough to content me I wanted nothing more than I was likely to have ‘save that most difficult to gain of all possesions a heart in unison with my own’ –

§ alluding to madame G-[Galvani] ‘They are who thinK but little or tomorrow or of yesterday – are they the happier? I doubt it much – Then are, too, who have no faith in worlds to come; who have no stay for thought to rest upon, and, with whom, it would ‘destroy their paradise’ – when ‘we go hence, and are no more seen, who ever much remembers us, save that lonely one within whose heart our shrine was raised?’

ThanKs for her present of the Environs of Paris – I should con it over and plan some litt[l]e excursions for us concluded my letter with bidding her tell me everything and ‘remember it is the gentle beam of affection not the meridian blaze of intellect that makes happy the heart of your affectionately attached AL’ –

vide last wednesday page 285. no observation made on mrs. B-’s[Barlow’s] letter because I had not time – 3 pp.pages long ends, and a great deal under the seal, all very small and close – § very very affectionate ‘a diversity of objects and scenery saved you from the intense misery I have suffered’ and she goes on to describe feelings much more intense than I had ever dreampt of her experiencing for me it ended in her being ill and having a great deal of fever for which Mrs Guantlet made her take calomel etc. § ‘I became so ill I had so much fever that I composed letters in my brain to your uncle telling him that your return alone could save my child from being an orphan’ – ‘so thin am I that my rings are laid aside I kept losing them every moment’ – about the going to Edmonto[n] etc. she says ‘I know not how to express all my obligation none but yourself could have acted as you describe the invention and decision was unique and the desc[r]iption capital’ –

§ Mr William Bell her ‘old beau’ had called and sat two hours with her making it evident he would offer if he thought he had the smallest chance of being accepted § ‘when I saw him..... I asked myself is that the man who caused much a sensation in our families how altered how changed in every respect’ – ‘would that I had but one day more of your dear societyelf in this ssalon I have so many things unsaid which perhaps we may never meet with op[p]ortunity to express but to tell you truly I must have many days of your society to induce me to undergo the agonized feelings I endured the days which followed your departure I thought I was near my end not that I fear death but on my childs account not that I love you less but that I feel satisfied you would be decidedly better provided for without the burden of my acquaintance which can only prove disadvantageous and imprudent in being encouraged I must stop op my pen for I know non [not] what my light head would scribble on to say the best thing I could do with this sheet would be to consign it to the flame my next I trust will be more rational god bless and prese[r]ve you you know all I would say adieu CMB’ thus ends the third page –

Her aunt writes that mr. de Lancey speaKs highly of me – Jane has got the SKetch booK with ‘which is extremely well bound – I never saw Jane so delighted with anything’ § – of madame G-Galvani ‘I do not Know anyone who only thinKs of the present so much as our friend – all her actions, even in respect to economy, portray the same character’.... my letter sent off from London on the monday reached mrs. B-Barlow the Thursday following (the 14th April) – and was charged 24 sols – written on my very thin French paper and wafered –

§§ in my answer when on the subject vide line 12 from the bottom of the last page slightly alluded to our connection none could possibly understand it but herself said I still sighed § after happiness gone by with a sigh more deep and long than she might think ‘in the midst of occupation when the strong voice of duty and necessity call on our attention the mind may be diverted for a while but tis the hour of rest when we retire into ourselves tis then when wh fancy brings to mind what absence takes away and thought of happiness gone by disorders all the heart’ said my own room was perhaps the worst place in which to calculate my loss – in an earlier part of my letter had hoped that at all rates she would not be disappointed in me as a friend § would have nothing to regret but my misfortune (this hard necessity of circumstance that brings around me now) nothing to reproach but my loving her too well this would be my only fault towards her which I hoped she would forgive ‘and even its very faultiness may wear away with time for time may come when my regard maybe your own without another voice to claim it maybe your own as well from duty as from inclination §§ – in another part speaking of my regard for her calling for no sacri fice on my part my prospect were good enough [?] and alluding to her thinking of Janes interest ‘even pride forbids that all the sacrifice should be on one side’ meaning hers § adding ‘if you were as ssingle as I am I should expect the same sacrifices from you I would in such a case make myself’ -

Breakfast at 10 1/4 – came upstairs at 11 1/4 – had just written the part of my journal of today on the last page when (at 12 1/2) Cordingley said Dr. Kenny and mr. Sunderland were come (to my aunt) went down – went into the drawing room, where they were with my aunt, for 10 minutes – then waited their going, and followed them into the front stable – spoke to them for a minute or 2 – Dr. K-[Kenny] thinKs my aunt in a very weaK, suffering state – a very delicate subject to deal with – this catching – convulsive motion of the diaphragm which has come on so much within these last few days, the worst symptom – I see he thinKs her constitution much broKen –

she had a warm bath last night, and is to have one again tonight about 98º Fahrenheit – after coming up to bed last night, went down to see how Cordingley had ordered the bath – found the tub 3/2 to two thirds full of water at 170º - staid 25 minutes till Cordingley had put in cold water that reduced it to about 100, or a few degrees more – my aunt too was sitting by the lower Kitchen fire waiting all this time – very bad management – and the tub placed just under the oat bread racK

staid talKing to my uncle and aunt, and did not come upstairs till 1 3/4 – then wrote the whole of the last page which tooK me till 3 – from 3 1/4 to 5 1/4 wrote 3 pp.[pages] and the ends (tolerably close) to mrs. N-[Norcliffe] to go tomor[row] – easy chit-chat, in answer to mrs. N-’s[Norcliffe’s] letter on wednesday 3 pp.[pages] (quite full) the ends, and a good deal under the seal –

a very Kind letter – I had no time to make any observation on it on wednesday – anxious to Know that M-[Mariana] did not visit colonel BerKeley – ‘why introduce her to him at all – old as Jam, I would not be introduced to him’... § a man whose character is so despicable and well Known, that it did not want the addition of his treacherous conduct to miss Foote, to make him as I believe he is, most generally despised .... it is not the 1st trait of treachery to a female’... together with what I copied from M-’s[Mariana’s] letter in my last to mrs. N-[Norcliffe] and the remainder I have copied in this, conclude the L-s[Lawtons] did not visit him, but left mrs. N-[Norcliffe] to form her own conclusions –

§ on her 1st page mrs. N-[Norcliffe] writes ‘you and I suit very well; and, should I live and have my health next year, at this time, should much enjoy a sejour of a month in our capital (London) with you’ – answer after mentioning my uncle and aunt’s health, and saying Dr. Kenny had been here this morning to see the latter – ‘should they be well enough for me to leave them, next year, and this time, nothing would delight me so much, as a month with you in that 1st of cities, London – at all rates, I hope and trust, no flaw in your own health wil be the preventative’ –

Have asKed mrs. N-[Norcliffe] if she Knows anything of mrs. Middleton, daughter of sir William Grace, wife of Mr. Middleton of IlKley – mother of mr. Peter m-[Middleton] of StocKhill-parK who married Miss [Stourton] – wrote the above of this page read over and folded and directed my letter to mrs. N-[Norcliffe], and had just done at 6 –

Great deal of rain last night – rained from the time of my getting up, more or less, till about 3 p.m. – about 8 a.m. sent John Booth to desire nothing to be done at the foot path – no stones to be led, for fear of cutting Thomas Pearson’s field – Dinner at 6 1/2 – Did nothing in the evening – Fair this evening (vide the 4th line above) Barometer 3 1/4 degree below changeable Fahrenheit 44º at 9 p.m. at which hour came up to bed – Reading volume 1 Rousseau’s confession and looKing at the map of England and that of France, for about an hour – E [2 dots inside] O [1 dot inside] – my cousin came just before getting into bed

#anne lister code breaker #1825 #maria barlow

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