#the unmarried mother

[olafkardanadam]

“Bekleyenlerin başına güzel şeyler gelir derler, bilirsiniz. Ama sadece acelesi olanlar geride bir şeyler bırakır.” dedi. İnanamamıştım.

"Neden herkes istediğini alırken bana hiçbir şey düşmüyor? Sürekli güçlü olmaya çalışmaktan yoruldum."

#“Kim olmuş olabileceğin için asla geç değildir.” #sarah snook #ethan hawke #predestination #kader #mr. robertson #dr. heinlein #the unmarried mother #bayan stapleton #ajan miles #dr. belfort

[manager-dante]

usually this would annoy me a lot more, but seeing fanon rodya evolve as this soft domestic mom type is so goddamn funny to me. i can’t even blame y’all. literally ANYONE looks parental compared to these goons

ryoshu is literally smoking in the back watching dq beat the shit out of sinclair. rodya is motherly SOLELY by process of elimination bc the bar is on the floor 💀

#shes not motherly the other sinners are literally taking turns knocking him unconscious 😭😭😭😭😭 #i think she kinda has big sister energy #but like some of yall are out here reducing her entire character to mom friend and its like #she is literally encouraging ANTICS half thr timr LMAO #and also just bc a woman. has compassion for other ppl doesnt make her an uwu domestic wifey mother #its giving tht one article that described jane gooddall as taking a ~motherly touch~ to her work #ah yes. single unmarried woman venturing into an extremely dangerous jungle to do important research........ bringing her motherly touch.... #SHES SO MUCH MORE COMPLEX THAN THAT #limbus company #rodya lcb #outis lcb #heathcliff lcb #don quixote lcb #sinclair lcb #ryoshu lcb #dante lcb

[frevandrest]

I am reading McPhee's bio on Robespierre and somehow only now I realize his maternal grandmother was 39 when she married and 42 when she had Jacqueline.

I keep finding more and more 18century women who married in their 30s and had children in late 30s/early 40s: Mme Duplay too. Tallien's mother. Also SJ's mother but she is young in comparison since she was in her early 30s.

So that's interesting. For some reason, I assumed a woman was considered past her prime marriageable age by late 20s and that would seriously harm her chances at finding a suitable/good match (vs marrying men who are not ideal candidates but would accept an older bride because beggars can't be choosers). But this doesn't seem to be the case? (At least not among these examples).

I know Mme Roland said in her memoirs that she married kind of late-ish (25-26) but it seems that staying unmarried into 30s was not an absolute catastrophe (if marriage was a goal, and what else could you do realistically). It lowered your chances significantly, yes, but if you wanted a husband and children there was still a chance, and seems like you wouldn't have to settle for someone who was seen as a poor match (as in, someone you wouldn't want to marry if you had a chance to marry in your 20s).

So all in all, it puts a different perspective on my fav spinster. I always assumed Charlotte Robespierre was seen as way (way) too old for marriage during frev, but she was 34 when her brothers died, and it wasn't that old. So what if Thermidor ruined her marriage chances? Look: I have no idea if she even wanted to marry - none of the siblings ever married. (Though she claims she had accepted Joseph's proposal so I guess she wouldn't reject marriage). But it does put into the perspective the whole "jealous spinster" narrative surrounding Charlotte.

(Or maybe I am wrong and marriages in your 30s were a rarity but there are honestly more of them than I expected. In any case, I don't see Charlotte settling for someone just to be married but maybe I am wrong about that, too.) Thoughts?

#also therese gellé's mother was 30 when she had her but only married at 42 #but still another case of a woman unmarried at 30 #frev #18th century #gender history #charlotte robespierre #robespierre

[plotwholls]

I adore Princess Jazz with all my goddamn heart, but why are so many people sleeping on Queen Mother Jazz?

#I think we can ALL agree that Jazz did the raising #and it’s generally agreed upon that Ghosts respect emotion over blood #and given how it was SUPER common for the mothers of unmarried kings to step in #and for them to MAINTAIN some of their power even AFTER their sons got married #it is PERFECTLY plausible to have a Diplomat Jazz who has to go around explaining that she parented a dead child into royalty #like COME ON it’s RIGHT THERE— #danny phantom #jazz fenton

[legoflowers]

#me after a full day of 'your daughter is so pretty she makes me wish i had sons' and 'your daughter is gorgeous i wish my sons were older' #you know whats kind of embarrassing tho #not the last wedding but two weddings ago there was this woman who thought i was nudge nudge wink wink really cute #and she was talking to my mom about me and stuff #well that day i was wearing a black dress and my mom was wearing a teal gharara #and for this wedding we were like its a little soon to repeat outfits but the crowd at this wedding is gna be completely different bc #the families of the bride and groom are from a different village back home #and we were right the crowd was completely different EXCEPT for miss wannabe potential mother in law #so this woman we never see otherwise sees me and my mom wearing the exact same thing as when she saw us last #i wouldve been more embarrassed but my mom said she was wearing the same thing too #anyway they were talking for like an hour #the woman has 3 sons and the one she want me for is the second oldest #i think he's in law school or he wants to go to law school or something #i couldnt eavesdrop too well the music was too loud #but he sounds a little older #anyway my matchmaker mother is not gna skip out on the chance to become besties w that woman bc even if i end up saying no to the rishta #(which is not a rishta yet btw just chatting atm) #a woman with 3 unmarried educated adult sons is like a gold mine in my moms eyes #her eyes were glazed over w the excitement of potential matches #hashtag arranged marriage tings

[snowonthebeachftlana]

Bestie feel free to share your thoughts of Taylor's use of marriage in her discography 👀

ok so! in her early discography we see marriage presented as the accepted default for girls to aspire to in their romantic relationships. we get ‘he knelt to the ground and pulled out a ring and said ‘marry me juliet, you’ll never have to be alone’’ and ‘take me back to the time when we walked down the aisle, our whole town came and our mamas cried’ and ‘you were gonna marry me cause we were happy’. but on fearless we also begin to see it as a preoccupation which comes an easy second to pursuing her dreams of being a successful singer-songwriter: ‘back then i swore i was gonna marry him someday but i realised some bigger dreams of mine’. she returns to this theme later on in midnight rain: ‘he wanted it comfortable… he wanted a bride, i was making my own name’.

by speak now, some of taylor’s peers are beginning to get married themselves. but in this case, what she’s really interested in is crashing the wedding and running away with the groom, and mocking the stereotypes of a big white wedding (although this comes from her distaste for the bride, rather than any particular criticism of the institution itself). so we get ‘she is yelling at a bridesmaid somewhere back inside a room wearing a gown shaped like a pastry’ and ‘the organ starts to play a song that sounds like a death march’. the wedding is silly, but only because the bride is an obnoxious bridezilla about to marry the object of taylor’s desire.

then later on she has to grapple with marriage as a potential weapon used to lock her into a toxic relationship and stifle her ambition and personhood. we get lyrics like ‘bad omen, dragged my feet right down the aisle’ and ‘your picket fence is sharp as knives’. she didn’t want a diamond ring from him - she IS the diamond (diamonds in my eyes, i polish up real nice, a diamond’s gotta shine). i also see some parallels to the affair in ivy - the narrator is trapped in an unloving relationship with her husband, she’s able to find brief snatches of happiness with her secret lover, but it’s clouded by fear (what would he do if he found us out?)

meanwhile on lover, she finds long-term romantic fulfilment (take me out and take me home forever and ever) without needing marriage as a prerequisite to complete their relationship. the bridge intentionally mimics wedding vows, but at the last minute, instead of referring to a husband, she swears to be ‘overdramatic and true to my… lover’. paper rings also plays around with wedding imagery while emphasising that the formalities aren’t the most important bit.

finally we get some direct critiques of the expectations which society places on women in particular with regards to marriage. in champagne problems, others decide that the narrator ‘would have made such a lovely bride. what a shame she’s fucked in the head’ - if she doesn’t want to get married, that’s a problem with her. and of course midnights has just given us ‘all they keep asking me is if i’m gonna be your bride, the only kind of girl they see is a one-night or a wife’ and ‘no deal, the 1950s shit they want from me’. she’s just enjoying existing in the lavender haze, why can’t people let her be? marriage is something she will take or leave on her own terms, nobody else’s, and what truly matters to her is the relationship itself.

#as someone whose parents are happily unmarried (at my mother’s insistence) #and also has friends who are happily engaged and whose weddings i am looking forward to #i appreciate the way taylor talks about it in her later music #anon #ask #lyric parallels #sort of #ok i figured out how to add a readmore on mobile

[stiltonbasket]

in the flowers in the palace au, when did lwj realize that she was in love with wwx? It seems like she knows by the first part of the series, since lqr is trying to encourage lwj to marry and she's refusing, so did lwj fall in love when wwx was studying at the cr (if that happened in this verse)?

Lan Wangji's love realization happens when Wei Wuxian breaks into the Cloud Recesses to comfort her in "for myself, in my frenzied heart." This doesn't have much to do with Lan Wangji's refusal to marry; she was simply raised differently from most other girls in the FITP universe, because Lan Qiren and Qingheng-jun knew they could rely on Nie Mingjue to protect her after their deaths through NMJ's marriage to Lan Xichen.

During Lan Wangji's childhood, Nie Mingjue's father was a high-ranking general who controlled the most important military garrison in the empire, and LQR/QHJ were confident that Lan Wangji would be free to live the life she wanted (and stay safe from power plays within the Lan clan) as long as LXC had the Nie family behind her. Thus, LWJ was allowed to choose the subjects she studied after she came of age; and when she decided to pursue higher studies in music and weapons training instead of learning how to manage a household, QHJ didn't object.

By 21, Lan Wangji would have found it extremely difficult to fulfill any of the responsibilities of a gentry wife, so QHJ/LQR never considered marrying her off until Qin Su joined NMJ's harem as a concubine (signaling a loss of favor/power on Lan Xichen's part).

#asks #flowers in the palace #lan wangji #reference #part of the problem (re: lwj living the life she wants as an unmarried woman) #is that there are male heirs around who would refuse to respect lwj's leadership of the clan in future #and unlike say jiang yanli #lxc and lwj do not have a maternal family to back them up #because their mother was a wen princess who eloped with qingheng-jun and then went into seclusion for the next 16 years #so wrh wouldn't find out #and after lqr and qhj passed away lwj would have no one to protect her within the cr #luckily by the time madam lan died lxc was 14 and already pretty much spoken for re: marriage #so she had the assurance of future protection through her sister after losing her mother #and qhj rly didn't want to think about a backup plan for lwj bc he'd only need one if lxc or nmj died before their marriage could happen #and at the time nmj was the heir to a dukedom and part of a strictly monogamous family #so qhj figured that lxc would have all the power she needed as a) nmj's wife or b) his widow if he was killed in war #he was not counting on nmj overthrowing wrh and crowning himself emperor

[questioningdragons]

I've been rewatching/catching up on Call the Midwife and it's amazing how many important topics this show covers. Including an episode that completely dismantles the myth that what a woman wears matters in any way when it comes to being attacked. This predator attacked a sex worker, a young mother out walking her colicky baby, and a nun.

#call the midwife #there's also episodes on how banning abortions hurts people #on how much pain anti-sodomy laws caused #on the effects of the stigma against unmarried mothers #on postpartum psychosis even #this season has a thalidomide arc

[phantomdecibel]

had Enough of the way so many fandoms treat found families. and I’m gonna write family dynamics you couldn’t begin to comprehend or twist into a nuclear family dynamic about it. wish me luck. not that I need it but still.

#FOR. EXAMPLE. #that man ain’t their father he’s their democratically and unanimously elected matriarch at the most. the term father does not apply to him #here in this context. #found family can be 50 unmarried fathers who don’t actually have any kids. found family is dynamics you couldn’t begin to explain half the #time. stop turning everything into ‘father and/or mother and their kids!1!!111!’ #and if you /do/ then stop making the parents so one dimensional. stop erasing the fact that they’re just as chaotic as their quote unquote #‘kids’. don’t be a coward. #anyways.

[cypresstheworld]

update on the old guy who's laundry i do at work and then we bitch about right-wingers together: he told me he's obsessed with trains today... he has sets still<3

#his name is MARK and hes around sixty and is unmarried and takes care of his 95 year old mother who has dementia<3 #anyways i WAS like hmmm this guy seems autistic like a couple weeks after meeting him but well. #also last year my car battery died and i wasnt sure if it was still under warranty and i was complaining about it to mark #and he gave me 50 bucks toward a new battery and then wouldnt take the money back when the battery was under warranty still :( #anyways we're besties<3 #hes just this nice friendly kind old guy who tips 40%

[glass-trash-bab]

I really gotta make a solid backstory for Henrik, I don't like the one I have for him now

#i really like thinking about his childhood and him just being a little guy with autism swag #and his mom also being autism swag with him :] i just think its really cute. them sharing special interests all the time' #-and his mom taking just the best care of him bc she knows what hes feeling and how things effect him. bc its the same for her #i imagine his dad just thinks theyre both just 'exentric' (bc none of them know theyre both autistic) and hes just like 'ha thats my family #hes also probaby hard on Henrik sometimes about like grades and making friends n shit. havent really decided yet #but Henrik is generally a lot closer to his mom. autism mother son swag #but i dont have a lot for his adult life. i know he has to get married and then unmarried. but idk how thats gonna go #i wanna make Hens ex her own character like i did with Stacy but i dont want her to just be Another Stacy. idk man #in my original backstory for him. she didnt really have a lot going on besides hen and being a mom. and then their kid dies- #and she unfortinutly kills herself :( but im not really happy with that ending. i want her to have a life and a personallity #i want another milf. shes a woman in stem. shes powerful. shes a bad bitch. i want her to be a Character. and i want her to be Alive. #and i wanna develop their kid as a character. i still want them to die but they have to be a Character for it to be impactful #yeah im just thinking about Hen and his family #glass ego lore

[sy666th]

"Voto contro Natura" (Vote against nature) . Made between 1860 and 1870, it is the anti-clerical denunciation of the terrible practice of the forced monacation. The subject is a woman in religious clothes and in advanced pregnancy, hidden in a corner in a deep state of despair, almost as if it were a prisoner.

There is a dedication engraved in the base of sculpture: '' to the protectors and supporters of the vote against Natura '', a real scream against those who favored the practice of the forced monacation of pregnant girls. The environment around the woman is unequivocally miserable, squalid, to underline the sadness and impotence of the subject.

Salvatore Grita wanted to demonstrate his contempt and his pain against the practice to intern in the convent unmarried mothers, perhaps also because he himself, son of a very young mother girl, grew up in an orphanage entrusted to the cloistered nuns, who evidently not They left him a great memory. So the story was deeply felt for him.

#Sculpture #anticlericalism #forced monacation #pregnant mother #Italy #Sicily #Salvatore Grita #unmarried mother #catholic convent #child abuse #nuns

[starsoforionwrites]

Ugh pls don’t kill #badbitch Tonks. I want to see her and Hermione go on friend dates leaving Teddy behind with Draco or something. Just imagine grumpy!draco holding a cute lil baby while his girlfriend? fiancé? wife? And cousin leave him behind. Narcissa and Andy also refuse because they have a spa day planned xD

ooo you can kill Remus tho. Or maybe Tonks gets a divorce? Either way, she’s single and living her best life.

side note: this mini headcanon(?) obvz depends on Tonks being pregnant. Which I think she is. Even in the book, i believe the only reason why Remus married her was because she got knocked up and having baby daddies is a very post 2010 thing.

alsoooo you HAVE to include the manor scene. Like c’mon. The angst? The drama? The repercussions??? *chefs kiss* maybe Draco tries to help her but also ends up getting tortured or something and then all 4 of them run away idk

I mean, it's a story so I can and will kill whoever I want and change whatever I want as I feel like it... 💀🐍

(spoiler: there won't be any cozy scenes of domestic bliss snuggling with cute babies in this fic)

#the darkfic #antinomian #asked and answered #also unmarried single mothers definitely existed long before 2010 #i know i was there #i hope this doesnt shatter your worldview lol

[frogchiro]

virgin sacrifice reader offered to war god ghost?? prepare to be his lovely wife instead of a sacrifice with at least 10 demigods running around, he wants to raise strong warriors!

Ghost would definitely be a god similiar to Ares; a god of war, brutality, bloodshed, masculinity and virility. Men go and pray by his shrine or in his dedicated temple to give them strength in both battle and bed, to be a strong and unbeatable warrior and be able to father strong, healthy children.

One such temple, the main one, is in a surprisingly remote location, surrounded not by a major city or capital but a few villages. According to myths it was this place where a brutal battle took place millenia ago where the fearsome god Ghost defeated an army all by himself, the blood of his slain enemies served to make the land fertile and for many villages to grow and prosper...until now.

Usually sacrifaces to appease the god would be made by the men of the villages; black stallions, the strongest bulls, wine, silver and pure steel, everything that has connections to masculinity and power, however some kind of horrible fatum seems to hang over your little village. The animals either die young or are sickly and weak, the wine turns out sour like vinegar, there in so money to buy anything either and it's taken as a curse by the elders. If nothing will be done and Ghost won't have his sacrifice who knows what will happen?

So they decide on the next best thing, a desperate last choice reach in hopes to appease the brutal god-a virgin sacrifice. The prettiest, unmarried and untouched young woman is to be chosen, dressed in the finest, gauzy silks and locked inside the stone temple in hopes that the god will come down and the blood of a slain virgin will calm his fury. Luck wasn't on your side it seems, you were chosen.

All you could remember were the desperate cries of your mother, the dissapointed remorseful look on your father's face and the ritual cleansing of the old crones in the village. You were cleaned in rose water, intricate patterns were drawn with a mixture of honey, mushed up berries and flowers on your breasts, around your nipples and bellybutton, and the most intricate was drawn on the place where your womb was. You were clothed in a white gauzy dress that was a symbol of your purity and then you were bound and dragged to the temple no matter how much you struggled and kicked and pleaded until you were finally locked in the dimly lit temple, only the many candles present to lighten the main chamber and to show the powerful, majestic sculpture of the god, Ghost.

Imagine crying yourself to sleep, everything hurt, you were scared and confused, all alone to die in this forsaken temple because some old men decided on it. Falling asleep out of exhaustion, the images of your crying, terrified mother haunting you even when sleeping.

Imagine waking up and instead of feeling cold and sore from sleeping on the unforgiving stone floor, and instead finding yourself laying on and under the most luxurious furs you've ever seen, the warmth of them felt like a blanket and the smell of them, pleasant warm masculine musk made a shiver run down your spine, just where were you?

Before you had the chance of looking around the room, you felt huge, strong arms clamping togehter around you and bringing you into a powerful, broad chest which rumbled with a growl like purr and a stern voice saying:

"Stay. Don't move around girl."

And the very same arms turned you gently around to face the man behind you and you couldn't help but gasp and breath out a tiny, frightened yelp-behind you was laying a man who looked like the stone sculpture of Ghost cane to life and became human. It...it was Ghost. You laid next to a god.

#kin speaks #asks #interactions #THIS IS SUCH A DELIGHTFUL ASK AND IDEA #sorry for this shitty ending but it was getting too long😭 #but i'm more than open to explore this more 💕💕 #god of war!ghost #cod x reader #cod mw x reader #simon riley x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #simon riley cod #simon ghost riley #simon riley

[homunculus-argument]

Random worldbuilding: A culture where everyone's social status is expressed through how their hair is braided.

Children all have the same kind of a simple, unisex "child's braid" which is meant for their parents to be easy to do - traditionally boys were only taught how to do a "wife's braid" while women braid both their husbands and their children, but a modern man is naturally an attentive father and contributes to both cleaning and feeding, and clothing and braiding his children.

While this kind of knowledge is more accessible in the modern age, the art of braiding is still seen as an intimate family thing, and it's not unusual for a youth to come out to their parents by the way of braids - for example a daughter asking her father to teach her how to do the "wife's braid", or a son asking her mother how to weave the "husband braid" for their future spouse. Or a trans kid asking their parents to give them the other gender's braid when it's time to transition from the child braid into the "unmarried youth" one.

It is nonetheless still somewhat common to see an older gay man with a "wife's braid" or two older women both wearing "husband braids", because that was the only way they were taught to braid a future partner's hair when they were young. They could learn the "appropriate" braid now, but it has become a part of the culture, an old-fashioned gay thing to do. It's pride - if you wear this braid to show that you're an adult with a spouse, why try to hide who braids your hair every morning?

The only braid that one is expected to do on themselves is the widow's braid - the only one that is also unisex, braided in reverse from the simple children's braid. Sometimes, young unmarried adults who have no interest in starting a family switch directly into wearing a widow's braid to signify that they are not looking for a partner and are independent adults on their own.

[like-butterflies-and-glitter]

i got my mother to take me to a gynaecologist for the absolute agony that has been period pain and i kept trying to talk about the period pain but this doctor would not stop bringing up my pcod, and not even to discuss the pain, all she seemed to care about was a regular flow and my weight. i get that that is important but can you listen to me and not make the entire reason for this visit just a footnote instead? it gets difficult for me to have faith in healthcare workers everytime i interact with them, especially in the case of reproductive health and mental health. done.

#i also had to go tk a different radiology clininc because she only had the tools for the a transvaginal ultrasound #and i couldnt get that since i am unmarried #unmarried in double quotes because that is code for virgin and basically i cant have anything inserted into my vagina before marriage #this was sadly expected of my mother but the implications and the mindset was more than just disappointing coming from a fucking doctor #like come on what the hell who am i supposed ti expect some sensibility from then #makes my blood boil #i know i have said this before and i will say it again #i cannot wait for the day i can have control overy own medical care and doctors #vidhik.txt