The Truth of the Matter
A/N: Warning dirty talk and misunderstandings of a certain word.
Summary: One day, Eddie, Dustin, Lucas, and Mike decide to summon a fairy. . .it's Steve Harrington. Chaos ensues. Pre-season 4, pre-Steddie.
Eddie pouted as he sat down on his throne. He was really looking forward to playing tonight, but Gareth, Jeff, and Frankie were all out sick. They had all gotten mono, which is what they get for practicing kissing. Gareth immediately yelled at him for that comment. Apparently, that's not what happened. Eddie was cackling to himself when the door opened. Dustin, Mike, and Lucas all filtered in talking excitedly.
"Hey, buttheads, did you not get the memo? Hellfire has been canceled," Eddie said.
"We thought you were joking," Dustin said.
"You never cancel Hellfire for anything," Lucas frowned.
"Well, Jeff, Gareth, and Frankie are all out sick with the kissing disease," Eddie said.
"Oh, that's right, they weren't at lunch," Mike said.
"Well, now what?" Lucas asked.
"You boys want to perform a spell?" Eddie said. "I found this cool little book at a Flea Market. Want to try it?"
Mike, Lucas, and Dustin all shared weary looks.
"Uh. . . "
"What? Don't be a bunch of chicken shits. Nothing is going to happen. It's just for fun," Eddie said. "What could possibly go wrong?"
"Of course, nothing is going to happen," Dustin said laughing. "That would he crazy."
"You're laughing a little hard there, Henderson," Eddie said. "It's not like I'm going to accidentally open a portal to hell."
Now, it was Lucas, Dustin, and Mike all laughing rather loudly. Eddie gave them all strange looks.
"Robes!" Eddie exclaimed, clapping his hands.
"We have those?" Lucas asked, and Eddie just cackled.
Several moments later, they lowered the lights and slipped on robes that covered their faces. Lit candles were scattered around them as Eddie opened a leather bound book in front of them.
"Why in the fuck did I get stuck with the pink robe?" Mike asked. "Why are all the others black and this one is pink?"
"You were too slow, Mike. Now, hush," Dustin said.
"What are we summoning?" Lucas asked.
"A fairy," Eddie replied.
"Why a fairy?" He asked.
"Well, according to this book, fairies have extraordinary healing abilities, bring you good luck, and have the ability to shield you from harm," Eddie said. "Sounds cool although, sometimes they have shitty luck themselves, so I don't know how that works."
"It also says they're loneliest creatures on the planet because they're wildly misunderstood," Dustin read over his shoulder. "Rather than harming children like some think, these creatures do everything in their power to protect them from harm. Most of the time, it is because they themselves were stolen in the night as children to be used by human greed. Aw, why didn't you say you just wanted to summon a lonely fairy who protects children?"
"Shut it, Henderson," Eddie said.
"And you're sure they won't be able to see our faces?" Dustin asked, and Eddie gave him a look. "Right. Shutting up."
Eddie began speaking and used his deep dungeon master voice as he said the spell. After the entire spell was done, they waited. . . and waited. . . Finally, a huge gust of wind swirled around them, the flames grew large, and the lights flickered behind them. Suddenly, a figure was falling in the middle of their circle with a loud thud.
"I was on a fucking ladder! What the fuck!" Steve’s voice yelled. "Oh, there's the light bulb. Huh, it didn't break."
Steve flopped onto his back and screamed at the sight of hooded figures surrounding him. Surprised voices whispered excitedly as they looked down on him. Steve furrowed his eyebrows in confusion at the sight of the bright pink one.
"Do not be afraid, Steve Harrington," a deep voice spoke. "We mean you no harm."
"What the fuck do you want from me?" Steve asked. "How did you even bring me here?"
"Magic. . .tell us your deepest, darkest secrets," the voice said.
"Fuck. Fuck! Okay! Okay! I, uh, like blue and yellow, but what everyone doesn't know, besides Robin, is that I like the color pink," Steve said.
"Interesting, but not what we're looking for," the voice said.
"I always wanted a little brother, but it wasn't until the kids I babysit came into my life that I finally got the siblings I always wanted, and I think if anyone of them died, I would die," Steve said.
"Aw," a familiar voice said softly and sniffled.
"That's . . . Really fucking sweet but no, not what I'm looking for," the voice said.
"Okay, okay. . .Robin's like my best friend in the world, my platonic soulmate, but I lied to her. She asked me if I was still in love with Nancy Wheeler, and I lied, I think I always will be. I just didn't want to seem so pathetic because I know it's over," Steve said. "Is that it?"
"Uh. . .warmer. . ."
"I once had a sex dream where I was with Jonathan and Nancy, but I never told anyone because I thought it would be weird."
"What the fu - "
"Quiet," the deep voice said. "That isn't what I'm looking for, but, uh, close."
"Okay, I once got my dick sucked at a party by a guy, and it led me to a lot of realizations. . ." Steve trailed off.
"OKAY. . .mi'lord, I do not think this man knows that he is a fairy," one of the figures said.
"HEY! That is a really offensive term. I'm bisexual," Steve replied. "Sacrifice me all you want but respect my sexuality please. Although I once used a rude term, I didn't know about myself at the time. Do you want to talk before you kill me?"
"You're, uh, surprisingly calm now," the deep voice said. "For someone who thinks we're going to kill them."
"Well, it's happened too many times now," Steve shrugged. "Is that what you wanted to know?"
". . .no."
"Well, I wish I was a woman sometimes. . .mostly because I wish I could go through the birthing process. . . I don't think my parents are my real parents. . . I once let Robin touch my dick because she wanted to know what it felt like. . . It was weird for both of us. . .sometimes I think about getting on my knees for Eddie Munson and - "
"OOKAY! STEVE, STOP SPILLING YOUR DEEP DARK SECRETS! I ACCEPT YOU FOR ALL OF IT BUT SOME THINGS SHOULD REMAIN A MYSTERY!"
"Let him speak!" The deep voice said.
"Stop with the sexual ones, at least!"
"Okay. . .um, it makes me really happy to know that I have a hobby to share with one of my kids. I mean, at least one of them, you know, understands why I like basketball so much. I love all of my kids, and I really wish I could play D&D, but I'm not great at math. I don't want to look more stupid in front of them. More importantly, I could be doing anything with them, and I still feel less alone knowing they want me to be around them. . . Even if they're being shitheads. I love it though, when they bitch at me. They're my family, and I've never really felt like I had that until they came along," Steve said. "Robin, too. She's my family too."
Suddenly, all Steve could hear was the sound of them sniffling, and they dropped to their knees around him. They dropped their hoods, revealing Mike, Dustin, and Lucas. They all hugged him tightly.
"What the fuck?" Steve asked.
"We'll explain it all later," Dustin sniffled. "Just know that we love you too."
"Oh, you're also adopted," Mike muttered.
"He wasn't adopted! He was kidnapped!" Lucas exclaimed.
"Oh, right."
The other person dropped their hood, revealing Eddie Munson.
"So, what was that thing you wanted to do with Eddie?" He asked with a smirk.
Suddenly, the doors burst open and Robin came running in, breathing heavily.
"Guys! Steve was changing the light bulb in Family Video, and he just disappeared - oh, hey, Steve! Steve! What the fuck's going on?!" Robin asked.
"Robin, guess what?!" Mike asked. "Steve’s a fucking fairy!"
"No! Robin, don't punch Mike! That's not what he meant!"
Mike screamed.
Part Two
215 notes
·
View notes