2023 media thread
Blood(originally from twitter)
2023 media thread! Copied over from twitter since it’s getting worse by the day. Scores 0-10 aren’t on the American grading curve, but more like ‘irredeemable bad’ to ‘changed my life’. Most things will be a 6-7 if I liked it. Negative = ironic.
Knives out (6/10) and Glass Onion (8.5/10). I prefer glass onion not only because it was a nice tight watch but also how oddly topical it was. Tate was arrested the day I watched this and Musk is on fire. Hopefully a prelude to more real mystery movies.
Wakfu: I’m grasping at straws for nice things to say. Not really pleasing to watch in French and some of the worst dubbing since gundam Age in the first seasons. The story feels like a pantomime and I question the standards of who recommended it. 1/10
The Rapsittie Street Kids Believe in Santa: this shirt is a cognitohazard to anyone who has used any kind of software. Each frame has so much wrong with it the human mind buckles into maniacal laughter. The grandma is the same VA as savathun. -9/10
Elf bowling: honestly kinda disappointing. Might be funny with some good company. I feel like the character Tom Kenny voices says something offensive but my memory just dumped everything about it. -2/10
Sound and Fury (2019): One of the greatest audio-visual experiences I’ve seen in a while. Not all sections were created equal though. Fucking watch it. I will say no more. 9/10
Lego Star Wars holiday special/summer vacation: Not good in the traditional sense but interesting because they give some of the characterization missing from the sequel trilogy with a dose of kid friendly robot chicken energy. Interesting to me at least. 6/10
Bleach Arancar Arc: Do I regret watching the anime? Yes. I could examine how stretched out this this was even with the filler removed all day. It is DIRE. Any sense of tension was destroyed and if I wasn’t sick I would’ve dipped. 4/10
Kamen Rider Black Sun: on a technical level I appreciate the movie. Good music, sound design, suits and it looked impressive for the budget it must have had. However, this might be the first toku I find actually offensive. No joke, it tries to recall George Floyds murder. Wtf.
Gundam witch from mercury S1: this is exactly what I needed and I’m waiting with baited breath. Nice to see the writing shine where ibo was dull. I’d buy the kits if I could 9/10
Knife or death: a perfect watch over some home cooked hotpot. The combination of gruff and warm hosts gives the show a ‘guys being dudes’ energy in a wholesome way. My only gripe is that as it goes on, it gets less diverse and loses some personality. More weirdos please. 7/10
Star Trek Prodigy: not particularly interesting on an episode by episode basis, but most treks have rough first seasons. Despite being a children’s show it’s more watchable than Picard or Disco, which is a low bar for me. It has trek spirit but it’s not made for me. 5/10
Astro Boy 2009:threw it on while I was cooking. Just as bad as I remember. I have some story boards for this for some reason. I don't know why. Speaking of not knowing why it feels like a 30-minute shows worth of content when it's over. It's strange. 3/10
Six String Samurai: I'd be more into this if the vibes were new to me. Unfortunately, I'm seeing this in 2023, so it reads like a Fallout New Vegas mod. In stark contrast to Astro Boy, this feels like it stretched on for hours and the kid ruined a lot of the cool moments. 3/10
Avatar 2: Not bad. Nothing groundbreaking, but great looking and drew me in for a sequel that was like 15 years late. I can't believe I was actually compelled by some of the characters. Avatar 2 was supposed to be a joke... 7/10
Shin Ultraman: this movie unashamedly embraces the fun Showa era energy like nothing I’ve seen. It’s funny, cool and is clearly a labor of love. It’s episode format makes me yearn for a tv continuation if it can maintain the constricted, but slick production and writing. 9/10
The men who made Ultraman: I get the sense a lot of the stuff in here should be taken with a grain of salt since it’s a dramatization, but man the peak behind the curtains on how creative and dangerous the special effects were then. Even the little things we take for granted 6/10
Vampire Survivors: I think by hitting 40 minutes I can kinda say I’ve ‘beat’ it in a sense even though there’s tons more content, but I need to add it to the list at some point. Good game with deceptively smart design to be a mobile game w/o the predatory garbage. 8/10
Rush Hour 3: Fun enough but I can feel the 2000s reliance on cringe humor and the stink of post 9-11 bigotry begin to set in. I had a few good laughs. 6/10
Loaded weapon 1: An absolute blast with the kind of cast you don’t see anymore. Again, Shatner is underutilized as a comedy actor. My final take: Sight gags are a lost art. 7/10
Spelunker my 2: I don’t really get the appeal of this game. Even with sprint switched off of default, movement felt oversensitive and deaths came only when my character did something I didn’t intend. Maybe I should’ve been on controller but this left a bad taste 3/10
Kill it With Fire: I appreciate smaller concept games like this, but as a recovering arachnophobe, this didn’t invoke as much of a response for me. My SO had a blast though. 5/10
A Few Good Men: Man. 8/10
Magic Lizard: ‘this feels like one of those adhd TikTok’s with an infinite runner game and family guy in the corners’ - @SuperheckDX this thing oscillates between middling slapstick to animal abuse. Genuinely disgusting for a moment (if you know you know) -3/10
SpongeBob in Tehran: enough of the jokes translate but the visual absurdity wears off pretty quick. -6/10
Webtoons I won’t dignify by naming: Trying out random Manhwa that caught my interest was a fun policy for a bit but I’ve been seriously burned. I could tear apart why even the best in the field have issues with long term storytelling due to issues with distribution. Im done 0/10
Puss in Boots the Last Wish: Being overhyped did this movie a disservice. The animation was fantastic, but there’s not much else here. I didn’t find it particularly exciting or funny and the musical number didn’t hit. I really it lacked that ohmf. Definitional 5/10 on my scale
Tangential, but Puss’s arc mirrors Kirk in Wrath of Khan. Do what you will with that.
Dwarf Fortress: disclaimer I didn’t play too much of this game but I appreciate its system rich nonsense. I’ll probably revisit it later since the unintuitive UI isn’t helped by most forum discussions not being for the steam version. IE idk how to make a horizontal door. 7/10
Entropy: Zero: Short sweet and to the point. It uses all of its creative ideas and remixes existing assets like nobody's business. A few stumbles like a turret stealth section that soft-locked me, but I appreciate a game that doesn't waste my time 7/10
Entropy Zero 2: I cant remember the last time I was this consistently exhilarated playing a shooter, maybe Titanfall 2. It delivers good writing, action, varied gameplay, gags and emotional beats. It caches the checks valve wrote a decade+ ago at their standard. A must play 9/10
Donbrothers The Movie: New First Love Hero. An absolute farce with almost no toku action. Needless to say it’s fantastic. 8/10. Will likely give any MMPR fan an aneurysm. The foreshadowing is clever…
Bionicle Mask of Light: I wouldn’t say it’s good since I’m an adult and have more tempered nostalgia, but I derived a lot of enjoyment watching it through the lens of knowing the lore and it added a level of dramatic irony. 5/10
Farscape S1: In its best episodes it delivers on a wacky premise and great puppets, at its worst it has pretty template episodes. The crews dynamic seems to be still finding the right balance of adversarial and friendly, and sometimes it just makes everyone seem like an ass. 6/10
Shadow of the Vampire: I might need to marinade my opinion on this somewhat. First impressions are good but part of me wishes it shied away from the come comical elements since the darker tone is interesting. Just made we want to see Nosferatu 8/10
Movie night speedrun Backstroke of the West: Surprisingly good joke dub -5/10 Marmaduke 2022: bizarre -1/10 Agent Revelation: what did they have on Dorn. 2/10
Movie Night Roundup: Alone in the Dark: false advertising, It was bright and I don't think anyone was alone. Made to be riffed on. -6/10 Fist of the North Star 1995: A total snoozefest that failed to hold our attention. The only fun was realizing Dante Basco was in it. 2/10
Pinocchio a True Stroy: We nearly watched a second dub with more generic voice action. Sadly this is basically unwatchable. 0/10 Waynes World 2: A weaker comedy than the original, mostly because it uses a recycled B plot. Nevertheless, a good palette cleanser. 6/10
Farscape Season: I appreciate the more serialized storytelling and multipart episodes. I appreciate that they are kinda figuring out the characters, specifically John going into his Joker arc. However, there were a few stinkers. 7/10
Record of Ragnarok S1/2: This isn't a particularly good adaptation, but the first fight should get an award for the most baffling adapted shounen fight. It truly put its worst foot forward. Otherwise pretty mid and doesn't make me feel particularly excited about the manga.
Vengeful Guardian MoonRider: On the plus side, it looks great and has a clear love of 90s anime and tokusatsu (Hakaider particularly). However, it just felt frustrating because of issues like an awkward walljump and a lot of cheap damage caused by the small screen. 3/10
Super Mario Bros(1993): people lied, this movie kicks ass. The bizarre mushroom kingdom is wildly entertaining, funny, internally consistent and inventive with how it remixes elements from the games. It’s not what the 2023 one will be: safe. 7.5/10
Return of Ultraman: I see what they were cooking. Not a lot to judge here but the way they stretched what they had was impressive. 7.5/10 Eragon: Laughed out asses off when playing Star Wars music. It synced perfectly at some point. But there’s nothing else to work with. -3/10
Aura Battler Dunbine (I): I'm splitting this up into three parts since I have distinct thoughts. The first third is relatively weak and fails to set up the factions (no idea what's up with house Given). However, it makes up for it with appealing classic fantasy aesthetics. 6/10
Dunbine (II): The middle chapter has a sharp improvement across the board. The politics and tactics begin to fall into place as the mech designs improve. The reverse Isekai arc with Garalia (my beloved) is a real standout. Bummer the Billbine sucks. 8/10
Dunbine (III): The final third speaks to me. The undercurrent of resignment and desperation pairs well with a massive shift in the mechanics of combat. While the repetition can get straining, the interjection of real-world interaction makes it work 8.5/10
Dunbine: I enjoyed the heck out of this series and appreciate the interesting ideas and aesthetics of this world. My only complaint is the way it approaches writing women. Its otherwise rad cast of mostly women gets tanked by Elmelie. Took me out of it. 8/10 #dunbinesweep
Farscape season 3: once again this season is an improvement over the last. Less crazy creatures, but more interestingly shot, especially towards the end. It makes the budget-friendly episodes go down more easily. I continue to enjoy John’s arc of just getting weird. 8/10
The thought that someday, someone will feed My Dinner with Andre with thousands of other contextless content into a machine learning algorithm fills me with a deep sadness. 9/10
Knife or Death Season 2: Overall pretty fun, but I felt that with the increased size of the episode order, they ran out of interesting contestants. You can only see so many redknecks in a row, and the finale was a bit of an upset in a b ad way. Season 3 needs some changes. 6.5/10
Donbrothers: This may be the funniest, most satisfying, and unapologetic show I have ever seen. I don't think any sentai can compare to it after, mostly because there hasn't, and can never be anything quite like this again. 10/10
Dunbine Neo Boston Well: phenomenal art and visuals but it kinda falls apart in execution. Eventually, you notice how little is animated and the Ovas have little time to explore its owns story let alone the amazing glimpses of this world. Good character design. 6/10
Destiny 2 lightfall: this expansion was so bad I think it broke the spell destiny had over me. It’s a bizarre swerve in story and aesthetics that is utterly betrayed by the most grating dialogue that was mixed in a way that hurt my ears. 2/10
Season of the seraph: a pretty middling season with some interesting mechanical tidbits, but not a lot to latch on to. It lacked the week to week narrative drive that kept me engaged. Now it feels like the content kinda ends in like 4 weeks. 5/10
Kentucky Fried Movie: slow start but pretty funny. The Enter the Dragon parody was a gas. We need more formless comedy chimeras. 6.5/10
JJBA:DIU 2017: what do you get when you remove the style, humor and pacing from jojo and try to take it completely seriously? Something that should never get it’s trilogy finished -3/10
Garzey’s wing: this thing lives and dies by it’s comically bad dub. Otherwise it’s a pretty write ova with a neat few ideas bot no real ending and would be an unsatisfying watch. However. The dub is hilarious. -6/10
Pledge this!: National Lampoon’s fell OFF! Idk if I can forgive @roflcopterbtw for putting this on the wheel…-3/10
Street Fighter: the legend of Chun Li: Firstly: why are you white. Secondly: if you want to see a better version of this movie, watch snake eyes. 3/10
Kingohger: first impressions: the first episode alternates between obscenely good looking and abysmal in was that is bizarre and completely preventable. They really didn’t have to do primarily cg environments. Writing is halfway to doing something cool but wiffs.
Onegamart: it’s like if a really well themed line ride kept going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going… 8/10 that was cool
Movie night roundup: Barbie the Princess and the Pauper: Concerningly well produced as a musical. Its a campy kids movie with comical CG. What more can I say. -6 Shrek the Musical: We were ENTRANCED by Farquad's costume! I can't say I agree with some of the decisions tho. 6/10
X-files S1 & S2: I find myself more compelled by the episodic mysteries rather than the serialized storyline. Maybe since the alien conspiracy feels a little one-note so far. The real treat is spotting famous actors and the occasional rising star at a higher rate than usual.7/10
X-Files S3 Vibe check: After a few real bangers, Ep12 and 13 were a 1-2 punch I didn't need after a stressful day. The hard dip in writing quality, bad drama, and cheap CW drama feel couldn't cover up what was clearly an anti-drug episode that no one seems to talk about. 2/10
The Man Who Laughs (1928): Essayists have already dissected this film on my behalf, but there’s something interesting here. Oddly enough it’s really obvious The Joker directly homages this more than I think it owes Taxi Driver. 7/10
G-Saviour: under the thick layer of low budget Canadian production and generic execution there’s some surprisingly cool cockpits sets and fight scenes that would’ve made for a good movie. However it isn’t and we never got the iterative sequels it wanted. 5/10
Welcome to Sudden Death: as Die Hard clones go this is a surprisingly fun watch. The reversal of the black comedy relief archetype and some genuinely cool but blue ballingly short martial arts sequences make this an entertaining 6/10 in the best way possible
John Wick: in all honesty this didn’t set my world on fire. I think it’s relevancy has more to do with it signaling that action movies could be cool again rather than the ‘secret world of assassins’ shtick I can’t see myself getting into. 6/10
John Wick 2 Electric Boogaloo: A marked improvement over the first for me, and a lot of that comes down to more creativity, bombast and actually being able to see the fights in this one. The secret society element was less rote than I assumed it would be. 7/10
John Wick 3: I think the missing ingredient might’ve been building up strong opponents. While an improvement, the movies deadly combat means each enemy gets one fight, so they don’t get the opportunity to develop. More bombast was welcome. 7/10
John wick 4: holy fuck in the goddamn. You know the movie is fire when 20 minutes later I say ‘John wick had a nunchuck, how tf did I forget that’. The last three are almost invalidated by how hard this executes on everything they both had and lacked. 9.5/10
AVGN movie: this one’s an oddity, it feels like a throwback to the golden age of early internet reviews despite coming out in like 2014. This is a realization of the channel Awesome movies but with competency and production. The gags and effects made me smile. 6/10
Trigun Stampede S1: Anime of the decade. Never before have seen such expressive 3d cg anime, let alone for tv. while it undercuts some of the charm of the original with its rush to the knives plotline, it makes up for it in its own identity. 9.5/10
The Future is a Dead Mall and Line Goes Up: I knew it was dire but wow. Line Goes Up aged particularly well. 8/10
X-Files S3: A real mixed bag, as mentioned earlier, this contains some of the best and worst episodes of television I can remember. While some parts of the serialized story are improved by getting interesting resolutions, my faith was shaken. 7/10
Pitch Black: Enjoyable as a thriller with a neat grimy version of space travel. it Tickles my fancy 7/10
Chronicles of Riddick: I guess this universe has a Warhammer 40K faction. I think the end result is cool, but I see why people think it was a weird pivot 7/10
Riddick: Just another cool thriller, liked the more survival elements at the beginning. 7/10
The Adventures of Kosuke Kindaichi (1979): One of the most impenetrable films I've ever tried to watch. I can't help but feel I lack the cultural context for this as a parody, but the visual absurdity and direction sell it. 7/10
Robot Ninja: Perhaps I'm just a sucker for the 'artist spiraling into madness' trope but this movie has an interesting take on it. If anything the Ohio shoe-string budget energy kind of enhances the delusion and unreality of it. Very critical of the comics industry. positive 5/10
The War in Space: I'll admit I talked with my friends through this one, but the model shots and excellent space suits caught our attention. Effective final sacrifice but overall it was uneventful in a 70s toku way. 4/10 (the captain had Leonard Maccoy energy)
What's up tiger Lily: The specter of Woody Allen haunts this film. While historically important as the first notable parody dub, the space jokes (which mostly land) and lousy 60's dancing interludes kill the energy and just make me want to see the original. 4/10
Skyrim SE: Since Skyrim is kind of a Super Game(TM) I'm breaking it up since some parts of it feel totally disjointed.
Skyrim (main quest): I assumed the Blades quest chain would be on the level of the Mages College in terms of importance. I appreciate its attempts to intersect with the civil war plotline but it felt over in a hurry. The final dungeon is a joke. 4/10
Overall, having the focus on melee combat against a pretty bad enemy variety makes the game feel like a slog. It does manage moments of brilliance, but the half-baked questing feels more like frustrating writing. Base game is a mess with potential. 6/10
Skyrim: Saints and Seducers: It kinda sucks how this DLC was plopped in without any consideration. I mean yay free content (I wouldn't have paid for it), but my animosity comes from stumbling into the strongest weapon in the game on my blind playthrough, trivializing combat. 4/10
Tron: Half the fun of this movie is trying to contort the metaphor of the grid onto my understanding of how these systems actually work, like naval admirals watching Battleship. The Wendy Carlos score is really unusual and has wormed its way into my head. A charming 4/10
Passenger 57. Die Hard on a plane. No Notes. 7/10
Batman and Robin: As a 60s Batman enjoyer, I cannot overstate how much of a joy this was to watch. The costumes, the set design, the pitch-perfect acting, the architecture, the cheeseball writing..never have I seen more camp with such ambition and budget. 8/10
Skyrim: Dragonborn: this smaller, denser island shows what Skyrim can do. Stealing from morrowind gave this place a lot more character and it was refreshing. However some bad bugs and dragon controlling being a complete mess…It was an 8/10, but man 6.5/10
Skyrim: Dawngaurd (vampire): not great. Besides careening down the main quests chain without noticing the 8 radiant quests(the vamps aren’t fun to deal with). Mechanically, vampirism sucks. I never found switching forms to be anything but cumbersome and it wasn’t any better…
Vampire and dragon attacks killing NPCs is a cool idea but having that happen when you’re doing the main quest is just confusing. Adding the Vale and the soul gem dimension is neat, but kinda shallow. Each felt like other dlc they condensed.
The saving grace really is Serana, which was further advanced by an incredible mod that has me wanting to restart and take the dawnguard path. Until then…5/10
X Files S4/5: Once again there were a few bangers, but I'm starting to get the creeping feeling that the atmosphere that made the series unique is beginning to get lost. I wouldn't say many of these are terribly tense or mysterious anymore6. 5/10
STEALTH(2005): Look, I'm of two minds about this thing. Yes, it wastes a lot of time. Yes, the DOD clearly inserted a 15-second scene that minimizes the interesting sci-fi of the movie in a ridiculous way that had my friends both booing and laughing at the movie...
BUT HOLY SHIT ACE COMBAT MOVIE REAL!!! The last half really leans into being a bombastic action and sci-fi thriller. I can't think of a movie that had a more left-for-dead character and 'the loyalty switching is nearly at gundam levels' -@SuperheckDX 7/10
Bright Memory Infinite: I'll give it credit for a surprisingly fresh twist on character action, but it's over just as it gets good and I feel like it learned the wrong lessons from the early 8th gen CoD era of shooters. Worst double jump in an fps to date 5/10
X-Files S6: I'm not sure how, but a shark was jumped at some point between seasons. Immediately the average quality went down and the episodes felt much less engaging. It still managed to surprise me (Aliens in the Klan???) 5/10
Lobsteroids: it serves video game fmv vibes. -4/10 No.1 of the secret service: fun action and a Dracula assassin make up for having a plot I couldn't follow, but I'll give them points for a bravely anti-climactic ending. Just a good B movie bond. 6/10
ZOE: 2nd Runner MARS: I'm not gonna sugar coat it, this fucks. The remaster really shows how strong the art direction is by sharpening it up and it looks and plays divine. However, the translation and dub are incomprehensible. It's like what people say about Tomino's writing.8/10
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 3: I don't think this movie was great, the jokes didn't quite make me laugh and there were some wasted opportunities, but the emotional core worked. I feel a good sense of closure from this over the MCU in general. 7/10
X-Files S7: Nah: 5/10
Azure Striker Gunvolt 3: I never got around to putting this on the list since I was hoping to finish the 2nd character playthrough, but that never materialized.
This game has sparks of good. Good voice acting and a few creative level concepts that sell the team’s energy. The gameplay loop of tagging and teleporting is married well with the well tuned directional aim. Its also up to Inti’s bar for visual flare.
However this is all in spite of everything else. The translation makes some bizarre choices that make Joule is immediately grating, mostly due to the choice to never shut up about fetters (you could just call them seals...). The timeskip is truly bizarre since it abandons all the plot threads for a more or less identical setting, just with apologism for the evil conglomeration which Gunvolt is okay with working for now (despite being turned into a dog for some reason.) Worse, Joule is immediately the most mechanically bloated character in a 2d game, having too many features at once in addition to the (also expanded with her abilities) Gunvolt style switching. Less is more, if they had settled for GV with the flashstep or simplified Joule individually it would have been more fun to control. If they were going to give players so much more combat capability, it would’ve been nice to have enemies that could actually fight back...6/10
Kamen Rider Geats × Revice: Movie Battle Royale: Who put battle royale in my previously battle royale-free battle royale Toku show...AND it crosses over with the first battle royale Kamen Rider? I’m gonna be real, Revice nostalgia was coming on stronger than I was prepared for with this movie. I hope we see more Seeker in future material and the Ryuki cameos were heartwarming (except Ouja’s suit had a prominent pot-belly for some reason.) 7/10
Revice Forward: Kamen Rider Live & Evil & Demons: I miss revice... Making Demon Hiromi a Vergil was an interesting choice 6/10
The Super Mario Bros. Movie: I’m of two minds about this. On one hand, This is really the best version of a Illumination Mario movie we could get. It has fantastic sequences with 80′s pop music replacing the perfectly timed and funny soundtrack for what feels like a quota. It didn’t really make me, as an adult laugh or really engage much with its emotional stakes one they entered the mushroom kingdom. (I kinda liked their whole failing plumbing business) They tried to do something with the core cast, but without doing anything really memorable, save for good performances in spite of the material. Chris Pratt isn’t awful. It should be deeply meh, but it has enough colors and the occasional humor to make it work. If anything I would like to see the midpoint between this and the 80′s one 6/10
However, the pattern recognition part of my brain would have lit up like a Christmas tree if you put it in an MRI. I’ll admit that even a cynic like me soyjacked a few times when I saw something from Mario 3.
Telefrag: Listen, I don’t like beating a dead horse...but I see why it’s a dead game. bad feedback and tutorialization make matches with only one bot by default and fast ttk even less interesting than they should be. 2/10
Eagle Flight: It’s amazing how Ubisoft finds ways to ruin their own games with corporate nonsense. On startup within steam VR, I had resolve the bugged out multiplayer launcher installation while having to repeatedly switch from my VR headset and my keyboard. It left a sour taste in my mouth for an admittedly neat and good controlling game. There were a few instances of inconsistent button prompts in menus as well. The promise of flying through the air like an eagle is realized but did it really nead assassin’s creed collectible and map mechanics? 4/10
Sierra Ops: I occasionally see moments where what this was supposed to be shine through, but overall the writing could use an aggressive editing pass to allow it to capture the excitement of a space opera by tightening up the interpersonal stuff. I usually love this stuff when its concise, but the relationship drama comes across as bloated and ends up sinking the whole experience. An hour and a half of half vague meandering disengaged me for the cool declaration of war moments. Even longer until the game properly starts. It did grab me once or twice but mostly I found myself skipping and it still felt long.
The gameplay is neat enough to begin with, enough to get me to the halfway mark but only having two possible other small ships in your controllable battle group kinda kills the exciting strategy and large scale warfare the premise promised.
The more mechanics it ads the worse it plays unfortunately. Mostly because the mecha can't be ordered and must be actively controlled, destroying the gameplay flow.
I also encountered a broken feature for the long range bombardment at the start of the third chapter where it only worked once. The only youtube playthrough that got that far had the same issue but never noticed.
I don’t think this thing is going to complete its 10 chapter plan, but with the >2 chapters I played. 2/10
Fast X: I feel hard judging this harshly since it is supposed to be part one of a duology(trilogy?) but I feel like the rubber is going to hit the road once we see the payoff to the setup. As it is, I can’t say it was mind blowing in comparison to 6-9 since some of the action sequences were deliberate retreads. 6/10
Rocky: A lot of times I find the movies pop culture upholds as classics are divorced from the actual quality of the material. This is one of those cases where I was blown away. I can’t think of another case where a character was so soulfully portrayed in every small minutia of the performance, direction and even set design. While I usually dislike the dirty look to a lot of 70′s film (I’ve watched a lot of movies that should’ve stayed in the 70s) the filth of Rocky’s world sings in every character. In the first 10 minutes I knew I would ride or die with this lovable loser. 10/10
My Friend Pedro: Interesting gunplay ideas that feel made for twitter clips. However I never quite felt the flow. The real enemy is a tedious and artificially extended playtime fattened with too many puzzle platforming segments that add nothing. Ultimately the ‘lol so random XD’ humor got old real quick. It had the energy of a Deadpool cosplay in the 2010s who didn’t know when to quit when he was ahead. 4/10
~~~Random Half-Life/Portal mod roundup~~~
Thinking with Time Machine: Its primary mechanic is interesting but cumbersomely executed. The puzzles are more a pain to pull off than solve and the writing is bad fanfiction tier. I encountered multiple repeatable crashes between levels. 3/10
Requiem of Science: It starts out as an uninspired series of levels and escalates into a baffling gasps of creativity that make no sense and have no real context. Random mashup of Black Mesa and Aperture assets? Kinda weird. Egyptian pyramid with a trap involving 15 consecutive headcrabs? What? It’s really just a series of random source assets combined with maybe your 3rd attempt at a doom wad in high school. The story is...bad. The protagonist is named Genry Freedom and it has spongebob beyond writing. 2/10
Snowdrop Escape. Too many straightforward puzzles and gunplay felt nonthreatening. I never felt challenged and this thing has essentially no story, not that I could hear it half the time. I’ll put this in my ‘bad multiverse media’ pile. 2/10
Rexaura: Good puzzles and fresh mechanics but the writing and story didn’t wow me. Competent. 5/10
Entropy Zero: Uprising: Encountered a gamestopping bug, but the pretty normal content didn’t give me the energy to continue.
Logistique: The puzzles weren’t as hard as they were dull. but I appreciate the effort 3.5/10
Portal Stories VR: can’t really say much other than I was trapped halfway through the floor and it had unity’s kinda bad movement. 2/10
The Lab: Neat gimmicks but only two were worth more than 4 minutes of my time. 4/10
Aperture Hand Lab: My controller didn’t have the haptics to progress, but it was pretty funny while it lasted. 5/10
Entropy Center Demo: Look we all know this is a portal fangame. Puzzles were neat enough with the rewind mechanic. I can’t say it has the wit that makes portal work yet just from the demo, but I hope it adds that X factor it needs. 6.10
Justice League: Putting aside my bias for the cast, which is peppered with some of my personal favorites from TV, This is a solid show. By most measuring sticks this measures up, but people like me who know too much about comics can get waaaay more out of this. It’s confident enough to show a haranguing news anchor wave around a copy of ‘Seduction of the Innocent’ assured both kids and general audiences understand its criticism of moral panics while respecting comic book fans to use their brains to catch the specific callouts to real world history. It has ham and it has heart. from the goofy golden age callbacks to the Christmas special with sharp character writing. I miss the dedication to creating quality entertainment with its material. 7.5/10
Shin Kamen Rider: Full disclosure, my experience with this movie was colored by a pretty rotten day. The first fifteen minutes were gold. There was energy. A snappy camera, brisk exposition and flare to the action. It replicated the tricks that made the original show work but dialing up the visually absurd elements to contrast with a more serious tone. I’ve heard some folks had bad screenings, but I had the pleasure of a few sporadic academic chuckles to add ambiance. Shoutout to the sight gag where the cyclone motorcycle is following Ichigo during a dialogue scene at a polite distance. The whole thing reminded me of Anno’s earlier live action take on Cutie Honey. However after the first act, I got the sense the film was petering out. Perhaps the format of adapting a handful of episodes risks getting tired, but by the start of the third act I was checked out. I don’t check my phone in theaters. I checked my phone, looked up how long the film was and questioned if I wanted to stick it out another hour. Worse this is the first movie to physically hurt my eyes. The penultimate battle is in a pitch dark tunnel with abrupt flashes of bright light that caused me to recoil, even cover my eyes after a few minutes. 3/10. That time he did a flip was cool, but I regret staying.
Rocky II: This should’ve been a cash-in sequel. It repeats the beats of a first film that needs no follow up. Rocky’s arc was done, do we really need another with the same beats? Second verse same as the first but a little bit more production value and pretty dang good. I’m giving it a 9/10 so it must’ve done something right. The melodrama of pregnancies and unemployment and comas didn’t have me, until it did. This movie waited to switch back to southpaw and didn’t let up after that. 9/10
DragonHeart: It’s a kids movie but it does have that childlike wonder and innocence you don’t see in fantasy movies these days. If I think the dragon looks good or bad depends on my mood at the time 6/10
The Master Demon: I’ve seen low budget but this is something else. We skipped most of it. -3/10
Battleship: It really didn’t have me, and then it did. This movie needed another few weeks in the editing booth because opening you ship action movie with some boner comedy shenanigans doesn’t bode well. Gimme a tight 90 cut and we are in buisness. There is no doubt in my mind why this is a favorite in a lot of navy households, because this is somehow more hype than Top Gun. 6.5/10
Justice League Unlimited S1-2: Fantastic. Perfectly constructed. It operates metatextually as a commentary, even a refutation, of many of Alan Moore’s works and opinions on superheroes. As someone who enjoys the odd comic book, the intertextual game of ping-pong that is The Question (voiced by Jeffery Combs, who better?) is an absolute joy to see. Adaptations like ‘For the Man Who Has Everything’ show a clear love for the character driven aspect of capes and cowls that you don’t see anymore. It more thoughtful and nuanced than it has any right to be, and talks up to any audience with more respect than I’ve seen out of superhero media (outside of maybe Gunn’s movies). Even the most die hard modern comic book fan should loop back to this for a shot in the arm of hope. 9/10
Justice League Unlimied S3: there was a third one I guess 7/10
[it looks like a few of the things I added got lost so quick lightning round]
Dungeons and Dragons, Honor Among Thieves: Hey! Thats pretty good! It’s a charming and fin fantasy movie, don’t see those as much as we should these days. Best of all it really captured the energy of someones unwieldy campaign. Hope a sequel has a completely different party. 7.5/10
Bumblebee in 4K: Each subsequent viewing I can deconstruct this into its component movies more and more, but ‘steal from the best!’ 7/10
Mikadroid: It was fascinating and had a unique atmosphere. The obvious symbolism of a 80′s Japanese bubble disco built on top of a ruin of fascist superweapon is a treat. Great costume and model work where it counts, but it undercuts itself with poor momentum and a monster that is shown in a few unflattering angles. Spotted a classic Ultraman actor so I’m happy 7/10
LoZ Cartoon E1: annoyingly competent 4/10
Kappa Mikey E1: I see why this wasn’t good enough for 2000′s MTV. In spite of it all it was actually a little funny -5/10
Mars Needs Moms: The implications will tie your brain in knots while the actual story is so bog standard it numbs your mind at the same time. The aliens were clearly somebody’s fetish in production. -4/10
Dune 1984: I’mma be real with you chief. this isn’t great. Sorry Mr.Lynch, they can’t all be winners. Nice Cameo though. I will come to the defense of character inner monologues though, but having them whispered doesn’t work. I wasn’t wowed by the special effects but the weird set dressing had a charm. 5/10
Across the Spiderverse: I might need more time to digest it, but within the first 10 minutes I had to stop and think if there might be other animated movies that look this good. Not even close. I think the beats hit me differently than some others, but yeah, no doubt. It’s great. Anything else would be nitpicks I will withhold till the second part. 9.5/10
Oh wait, Unlimited SpiderMan didn’t have a prominent role: 0/10
Heavy Metal L-Gaim: It pains me to say this, but I couldn’t finish it. Individually, each episode delivers top notch cartooning with expressive and goofy animation that really sell the wacky cast. That is, when we, as an audience, can get it. The plot lacked forward momentum and enough of it felt dull that I dropped it a few times. I skipped to the end and found a backloaded finale with a soggy final note. The vibes are top notch, but it can only take you so far. 6/10
Rocky 3: I though a shark was jumped when Hulk Hogan showed up, but they had me. They fucking had me. 8/10
Wolf Tracer’s Dinosaur Island: this had to have been a tax scheme or something. -4/10
Skull Island: I got nothing. No real emotional response. Nothing. It was there. It was inoffensive. But I gotta point out that at this point, Kong’s survival rate for plucky kid companions is pretty low. 5/10
The Italian Job (2003): A fun enough heist movie, but now I want to watch the original to compare 6.5/10
Transformers Rise of the Beasts: Just because it’s CGI action slop doesn’t mean it can’t have heart. Putting aside my predisposition to like this, it was a decently constructed version of what these movies are. It was coherent, funny and well made. My only gripe is that at the end they do something just kinda weird, but you know what? Who cares! Besides that one moment, the movie had my suspension of disbelieve right where it needed to be to have a grand old time.
As a Transformers fan? There was fanservice. I was a fan, and I was served. ‘Subversion of expectations is kind of a tainted expression, but by reversing a few familiar bleats was a nice variation on a theme. They could’ve easily messed it up, or gone too far, but so much as a few notes of a leitmotif made me a hair shy of spontaneous combustion. The credits stinger? Dumb as hell, but you know what this movie earned it, and My entire friend group was popping off. 7.5/10
Rock 4: This doesn’t quiiiite live up to the premise of ‘Rocky destroys the soviet union’, but it tries. however I felt more like I was watching an ad for the album. Kinda like Netflix shows that are desperate to make the next big TikTok dance after Wednesday performed well. 7/10
Farscape: I gave the last season a fair shake and found it kind of unwatchable. 2/10
Half Life Alyx: Oppressive. Immersive. Possibly the last VR game I’ll ever need to play until they make a sequel. This could only be by the virtue of being the only vr game that actually feels like a real game, but it is far more than that.
MyHouse.pk3: I kinda ruined this for myself a little since I blasted through the non-spooky wad version a few times confused about what the fuss was over. However the creativity and magic to make this work is astounding. The final beat was pretty cool. Short and sweet. 7/10
(Lost a few of my entries due to an edit error, these’ll be shorter than my original thoughts)
Black Mesa: A triumph of game remakes. While Xen is a more total reimagining, the rest of it really makes me appreciate how ahead of its time a lot of the original Half Life was. I often found myself suprised when reviewing the original, sections I thought were added in were in fact there since 1998. Genuinely gorgeous at times. 9/10
Devilman 2004: How do you make Devilman Boring? If you have seen any 2000′s Japanese b-movie, you have seen this one. Its got all the halmarks, minimal action, camcorder grade early digial picture quality and a lot of high school non-drama for some reason. -2/10
Bloodshot: This movie goes hard than it’s redbox-grade appearance would have you believe. It weaves this deception into its intentionally genre generic setup in a way that makes tired sci-fi tropes feel exciting. Its costumes and CG fights feel like they outmatch what marvel pours millions into. 7.5/10
Barbie Princess Charm School: The things I watch for our movie night’s wheel. It’s competent, but not as funny as the last one I watched. -5/10
Rocky V: It’s very 1990, though I feel like the energy is brought down by the cheap contrivance to reset rocky back to the streets TM. I will say that the emotional beats with Micky hit hard, and I appreciate having the fight at the end be out of the ring. Refreshing, but I think this was a good place to end it. 7.5/10
Andromeda S1: An efficiently produced show that takes star trek (in all but name) into an interesting new status quo. I did worry at first that it would fall into the bad habits of white savior storytelling and some cheesy sci-fi concepts (nietzschean? really?). However I can’t contest that I had a good time and there were enough fresh episodes to keep me happy. 7/10
Movie Night Speedround
Alone in the Dark 2: this is clearly a movie they just retitled. 4/10
Jupiter Ascending: Can’t rate since I might get back to this later but it at least looked neat. -4/10
Nick Fury Agent of SHEILD: Good casting but this sure is a TV movie. -4/10
Nutcracker and the Four Realms: This was more fun when it was an actual ballet production for 5 minutes. Generic late 2010s Disney twist and fluctuating production value. Morgan Freeman is a clockpunk father cristmas. 6/10
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Review: Japanese Special Effects Cinema:Godfathers of Tokusatsu Vol. 1
Over the past Holiday season I was gifted a book I had been wanting to read since its release in April; Japanese Special Effects Cinema:Godfathers of Tokusatsu Vol. 1 by J.L Carrozza.
As the book's title suggests, it's a comprehensive guide on the history of Tokusatsu. Vol. 1 spanning from the early 1900s to the end of the 1970s, progressing in a linear fashion with each major release while also providing context when needed. The start of the book gives a general overview of the special effects landscape in cinema from the earliest days, with works from international filmmakers laying the foundation that would eventually lead to Japan's own contributions and unique visual styling developed in the 30s.
The book truly picks up in the second chapter spanning from the late 30s to the end of WWII, when the concept of scale miniatures was truly crafted into an artform all its own and early suitmation was coming to fruition. The general presentation is to give historical context and background information on an upcoming project, followed by a particular film including its title, director, the film's release date, and the production history of the film itself. Carrozza then delves into his own general analysis and thoughts on the film or series, with a particular focus on (but not limited to) the special effects quality. Finally ending with more information about the film when applicable; contemporary reception, if it was a debut director, or if the film was seen by and noted as a big inspiration by a well known person. Anno of course comes up a lot, but he's far from the only one.
These analytical segments carry themselves with both a professional earnestness in examining the works, while also being fairly casual. One may even get a sense that Carrozza’s sanity is being tested by some of the later Gamera Films, probably some of the funniest moments within the book and one I find incredibly relatable.
Unsurprisingly, a great deal of the book deals with Eiji Tsuburaya. The man simply was incredibly prolific and damn near everyone in the industry was either directly taught or inspired by him until his death- which even then his many proteges would carry on the tradition and inspiring others in turn, which is one of the most intriguing parts of the book, particularly the aftershocks Tsuburaya’s death had across the entire industry.
However, I do want to point out that the book doesn't pay much service to Tsuburaya's personal life outside of providing context or important details, nor should it. After all, Master of Monsters is already a deep dive into the man's life overall. So while details such as his change in name and conversion to Catholicism are mentioned, they're not the focus point; the movies are. And of course, as major of a player as Tsuburaya was, he is not the only one given the spotlight in regards to their contributions. The Yagi brothers are regularly mentioned for all their monster creations, Noriaki Yuasa of Daiei is regularly talked about, even Tomio Sagisu and his weird Cat obsession. And the list continues to grow and change as new talent emerges, becoming famous in their own right.
By and large Screen Writers, Producers, DPs, pyrotechnics, prop and set builders, and various other units are brought up and given background information whenever possible and always a name to those behind the magic. The information is detailed, yet concise. The sheer dense nature of the book comes from how much is covered and the broad scope of covering every notable Tokusatsu production until the end of ‘79. (I generally can read a novel in about 4 days, this took two weeks)
Quite frankly, it's refreshing to see so much condensed into one space for so many seldom talked about figures in the industry, where they got their start, ended up, etc.
Equally refreshing is a wider focus on not just DaiKaiju films or just one studio, but a plethora of Toku from various genres, production teams, and how the industry shifted over time– to say nothing of the influence major Hollywood films would have on the medium.
War films, historical films, disaster movies, even Yokai films, occult films, space films, psychedelic horror, all are covered. And because the book goes in chronological order, the topic is always changing. 1965 kicks off with None But the Brave, then it’s The Retreat from Kiska, followed by Frankenstein Conquers the World, Zero Ace, and then over to Spy Catcher 13 on Television. It's not just about Godzilla, Gamera, and Ultraman. It's also Watari The Ninja Boy, Goke, Wind Velocity 75 Meters, The Bullet Train, Zero Fighter, ESPY, and Japan Sinks-- the film that inspired Shinji Higuchi.
We’re not just focusing on monsters and Super Heroes, even if that will always be the bread and butter of the medium, nor is it even just Japanese films. As long as a Japanese crew was involved in some capacity, however limited (i.e. Inframan) it’s covered.
This is by far the most appealing part of the book for me personally. Not only is its information a goldmine, but it can perhaps serve as an even broader introduction to more than just your typical idea of what Tokusatsu is.
The comprehensiveness and thoroughness of the information contained makes this both a captivating history lesson, and valuable resource to rely upon to gain a better understanding of Japan’s film history– at least in regard to the medium in question… With one exception that I have to get into, and boy do I really hate that I have to do this because 99% of this book is really great.
As mentioned, a large amount of the book revolves around Tsuburaya and those around him, those who could carry on his teachings, and those who would go even further with what practical effects can do. I'm very pleased to say the book doesn't just stop being engaging with Tsuburaya's passing, it's very much interested in where and how the industry gets on without such a prominent figure. Carrozza clearly has a deep love of miniatures in particular, you can tell by the enthusiastic writing this is his favorite aspect of Tokusatsu as it is with most people, and it plays a part in how much information is present. Because of that Tsupro, Toho, and even Daiei have a lot more readily accessible information to their history, just in general. It's why something like Spectreman can have four and half pages of production information, but you're lucky to get one or two on Ninja Arashi. What is there to say about something like that?
That's not to imply any of this information is easy to get, by no means. It's very hard work, particularly to sift through and condense everything- not to mention filtering possible contradicting stories or dated sources. But some things are easier than others. I will say it's impressive the amount of info that's presented for other studios, particularly P Productions and even Toei. They're given adequate attention, even in the early days. The back of the book features a full bibliography of all the sources and citations for this information, and a vast number of books pertaining to Tsupro, Toho, Daiei, even a few on P productions. Given their long and vast histories, it's not too surprising that there would be dozens upon dozens of books on the subjects.
However, Toei and more specifically Kamen Rider are the odd ones out with the least amount of books, which also isn't surprising.
But this does lead to what is quite possibly the most egregious part, which is Kamen Rider '71's segment.
Now, just to be clear, I don't wanna dunk on Carrozza. What he's done is truly magical and I am deeply appreciative of all that's here. But this part is flawed, and it's putting wrong information out there.
There are some good aspects. The book mentions early production concepts that are often glossed over, like how Tiger Mask was partially the inspiration, and even early concept names like Maskman K, Kamen Tenshi: Masked Angel, and Cross Fire. It covers Masaru Igami, Shinichi Ichikawa, and Shozo Uehara being brought on as writers. Although there's no mention that both Ichikawa and Uehara left to work on Return of Ultraman due to conflicts with Producer Toru Hirayama, while Masayuki Shimada and Hidetoshi Kitamura would take their place.
What is noted is that many of the concepts under Cross Fire were maintained, which is true. The Scars that show up when angered, Ruriko Midorikawa as the daughter of a dead professor, the Spiderman. All of that was under Crossfire-- Shocker as a villain organization goes back even further. A surprising amount of the concepts were attributed to Toei's creative department, even the scars which ended up only appearing in the manga.
Now the book doesn't get into all those fine details, it starts and stops at "Many concepts from Cross Fire were maintained" which is fine. Gotta keep things condensed and a lot of that information is superfluous for this type of book. We don't need to get into Crossmask: Kamen Rider or Hopper King. That's too much of a deep dive.
Where things take a turn is in regards to the design aspects. A popular and incorrect over-simplification of the story involves Toei wanting a Skullman show or something like it, but then it was decided that would be too violent so Ishinomori came up with the Grasshopper look. Another is the inverse where Ishinomori wanted a Skullman show and Toei said no to the premise/design.
Both of these are wrong with an inkling of truth in them. But the book presents a tale I've never heard.
The way it's told here is that Toei wanted a Skull motif to replace Crossfire, but Ishinomori felt it was redundant since he just worked on the Flying Phantom Ship in '69. He created over 50 designs and his son Joe picked the Grasshopper, which played well into some environmental themes Ishinomori was pushing for. There is ZERO mention of Skullman made just a year earlier, which is such a bizarre missing piece and the only version of Kamen Rider’s creation that I know of with no Skullman.
As with the others, there are true parts in there.
The actual tale is that Ishinomori wanted something downright grotesque and felt that Crossfire's design was limiting. Ishinomori proposed the Skull motif to Toru Hirayama, who in turn relayed it to fellow Producer Yoshinori Watanabe, who despised the proposal. Watanabe felt it was too derivative of Skullman and wanted something original, while the Broadcast Station, MBS, felt it was too scary for their family friendly time slot. Ishinomori made over 50 designs, liked a Grasshopper one best because it was still creepy and helped play into an environmental theme of nature fighting back that Ishinimori was fond of.
There was still doubt around the design, but Ishinomori's son, Joe, went through the designs and picked the Grasshopper, so it was sent for approval.
Now, this book mentions that Hirayama felt the insect design was weak as bugs are small, but eventually came around. Although it's claimed by Hirayama in his own book that it was MBS' Tetsu Shouno, who felt the insect design was weak, while Hirayama defended it. Hirayama did however have some reservations about the design possibly scaring children. When the helmet was finished, it was shown to a little girl, nearly driving her to tears, much to Hirayama’s horror. But it was too late to change.
The rest of the book’s segment is largely what seems speculative, like The Hulk being an inspiration because...transformation? One part also mentions that they originally wanted the character to Grow a la Ultraman, but Ishinomori talked them out of it- I've not been able to find anything to support that. The closest I know of off hand was many years later in Kamen Rider J, which Ishinomori was supposedly against with exception to if it was treated like a one off miracle at the end of the movie. That doesn't mean it’s not true to ‘71, mind you, but I can't say that's an unheard of gem of information, given the flaws elsewhere.
What's weird is everything following is fine. The analytical section doesn't really get into the human themes of the series, but it rightly points out the grittier overall tone and appearance of the series, noting the first 13 episodes are among the best of the era. Specific designers at Equis are also mentioned, including Akira Takahashi, Tsutomu Yagi, and Masamitsu Sakuma. Information like that isn't often discussed, it's just a shame that so much the preceding info is garbled if not outright wrong.
But it's also not all too surprising as information on Kamen Rider has always been extremely muddled, and there aren't a ton of solid resources in comparison to other productions, despite how notable the franchise is. I think the best example of that might be that goddamn Zone Fighter has more detailed information on the production side than Kamen Rider does (Though it doesn't hurt that Zone Fighter is more effects focused than Rider to begin with).
In stark contrast with the rest of the book's well researched material, Rider feels like the information is half remembered and lacking the details of other productions. Even when we get into V3 which has much more readily available information thanks to airings in Hawaii and a DVD release, it has a fairly sparse section on the production end.
And there may be some truth to the half remembered details part. One of the books listed as a source is Fujioka's The Truth about Kamen Rider and Takeshi Hongo, published in 1999. And I would not be shocked if some of the information contributed to not only the odd information contained here, but the general murky history overall. There's a solid chance Fujioka's recollection may have forgotten some details, or gotten some wrong.
I would've hoped that another book cited; Toei x Ishinomori would've corrected that, but there's no telling how detailed that book gets.
Regardless, other works like 2007's The Men Who Made Kamen Rider tell the story above, in addition to Toru Hirayama's 2012 bio: Crybaby Producer's Last Words - 50 Years of a TV Hero's Steps. Neither of course are in the bibliography. Even if we were to very generously assume that Hirayama's book was incorrect or embellished, I think it would be worth mentioning and getting into the varying scenarios instead of relying on a limited source when the information is out there, just not utilized.
It's a shame because I do truly feel this is an invaluable book with solid information, especially for lesser known productions, one that also gives a look at how trends would shape the industry. Hell, I finally have a name and photo for the damn machine Toei used for all its composite shots; the Totsu ECG system.
I still highly recommend the book to anyone interested in Japanese special effects, a ton of love was poured into this. But I also can't overlook that a major franchise has a mess of garbage information that only further clouds the murky waters. I hope this is corrected in a 2nd edition or at least updated info is mentioned in Vol 2 due in March.
As is, do not cite or rely on this as a source for Rider history, it's the one spot I can definitively say is bad.
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