#we love curating our online experiences

[emry-stars-art]

I think I’m gonna go again this week! I’ll be using the @/kedreeva style wip wednesday game (find the original rules here), but i don’t have separate wips so they’re still only scenes 😅

Closed! 🥰

The results this week:

sought out 👑 (1) (2) (3) (4)

keep an eye 🌊 (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

royal au gen - getting a feel for a full fic 👀 (1) (2) (3) (4) and out of sequence/extra: (x) (x)

First snippet from keep an eye:

“Finally overextended yourself?” Andrew asked. Wymack shot him a look.

“You can try to blame me for the fact so many of you are having crises at once,” he returned. “Let me know how that works out for you.”

“My crisis does remain ongoing. Who else besides this turtle you’re going to see?”

Wymack sighed. “This one’s not a crisis,” he admitted. “I just haven’t checked on the jellyfish in a while, I want to make sure it’s still around.”

Andrew pursed his lips a little. “Jellyfish.”

“Don’t give me that tone,” Wymack said in his own half-hearted fatherly tone. “You - hm. I… haven’t mentioned it to you, have I.”

“I see jellyfish all the time,” Andrew said. “So do you. Are you so desperate for something to rescue that you’ve moved onto the brainless?”

Wymack nudged him lightly, but he was still so much bigger that Andrew was knocked completely off course for a second. He ran into the whale’s side in retaliation. Wymack hardly reacted.

“I’ve already done that,” Wymack said pointedly, and Andrew narrowed his eyes. “No, it’s not just a jellyfish. There’s been a whole jelly mer around here recently, not even too far off.”

#not art sorry guys #once again to avoid the tiny onslaught just block the tag #emry wip Wednesday #we love curating our online experiences #one scene from royal au one scene from mer au #oops all mers specifically #so. I have like one thing this morning and then most of the day free #i will obviously be judging admission time by my own time zone #let’s go

[isabellehemlock]

Tips and Resources for curating your fandom experience across platforms

Hi loves,

I wanted to write up a curating resource post for fandom spaces, so here are some things I’ve learned along the way, and though only you can decide what your digital boundaries look like, I do hope that for anyone looking for them, this list might find its way to you.

For tumblr

How to make your DM’s only open to people you follow

How to make it so only people you follow, or people who follow you for a week can reply

How to have your ask box open, but closed to anon’s - no longer needed, there's a simple toggle button near the ask settings for whether to allow anons or not :)

Use the filtering function for your dash (this is also an option for a blocked user - who you might still see if a mutual reblogs them.  You can add their name to your filtered list, and then their post will be hidden on your dash).  This tip brought to you by @quiquimora tumblr resource post (great post if you’re new to tumblr)

For AO3

How to filter out keywords that might appear in summary or author notes, but not in tags (handy for when an author is trying to understandably avoid spoilers in the tags)

A script option for filtering (especially nice if there are certain tags you'll always avoid across fandoms).

Muting authors (a nice option if you don’t necessarily mind engaging with authors in comments, etc, but don’t want to see their content) - this secondary link includes a how to video you can now use the muting feature on AO3, no scripts needed :)

You can block authors now on AO3 as well, and here’s a tweet thread that shows you how, but also what it does, and doesn’t do

If you’d like to avoid certain ship pairings

How to use a few extra search symbols to filter out certain content

Quick tip: don't forget to save your curated search results in either a bookmark, or as a link on your mobile home screen - that way you can just do all the filtering once, vs typing it all over again every time you're loading up AO3

For twitter

Muting words/content

How to set up various privacy settings

For discord

Privacy & Server settings master list

Accessibility settings

Please feel free to reblog with your own tips!

Under the cut, a few extra tips for dipping into new fandom spaces:

Interact with reblogs and hashtags (this isn’t the end all to be all, but one way to showcase your sense of humor with commentary, or digitally applaud a content creator). People can get to know you a bit ;)

If you enjoy content creating, sign up for fandom events: big bangs, reverse big bangs, zines - a fantastic way to connect with several people at once sharing the same hyperfixation as you <3

Look up certain hashtags in someone’s blogs - not in the sense of digging up ten years of posts, but a quick search if you have squicks and triggers that someone might blog about a lot.  It’s not a judgment on them, for many might not follow you for the things you post about either.  It’s just self care to be aware of things you do not want to see on your dash and keep your following list to things that bring you joy - nothing says you can’t do the occasional reblog, or even connect with them on other platforms!

On the flipside - block liberally.  If you look up their blog and you both are on opposite ends of a spectrum on a topic?  Want to ensure they can never say such things to you in DM’s, etc?  Block.

And guess what?  People have the right to do the same to you.  Do not under any circumstances block evade.  This includes going to other platforms to engage with them if you know you’ve been blocked.  Just.don’t.do.it.please.

And if you've made it to the end, you get a digital cookie or hug of your choice 🍪🫂

#curating #filtering #curating your online experience #respect the inherent dignity of every person #respect your own boundaries - it's self care loves #use all the tools you need #can't curate the world - but we can curate our dashes #curating resource #filtering resource

[letitrainathousandflames]

Hey sorry to bother. You reblogged something from Lychgate who has an nsfw Twitter (dickgate) where he posts a bunch of really graphic clonecest. He’s a know fetishizer of clones and clonecest.

I truly, dearly hope you reconsider supporting him.

Hi! Thank you for the warning. I don't "support" him or anyone, per se - I see art I like and reblog it. I'm sorry, but I'll have to do a small rant. Firstly: do I fall in the "fetishizer of clones" category? Because most of what I do here is ogle over them and write graphic smut of them with self-insert reader characters. Anyway, moving on:

When I reblog art from the small internet artists here, I'm not raising a flag or promoting them or anything, I'm just... slapping some pretty/cool/funny art on my blog bc I liked it, y'know? My reblog of some person's doodle doesn't - and shouldn't - mean an immediate display of my agreeing with everything this person says and thinks.

In fact, we share glimpses of each other's thoughts, headcanons, opinions with a reblog and we move on to the next one. I have mutuals who like all sorts of things I don't - soup, hiking, the brithish royalty, hunting. I still reblog their stuff, and that doesn't mean our opinions on those topics align.

Of course, I'm always grateful for warnings about me accidentally rebbloging content from a terf/nazi/homophobe/pedophile/scammer, etc, etc. because then I can erase said post and report the user who made it to try make Tumblr a safer community. Disagreeing on whether soup is good isn't the same as disagreeing on lgbt rights.

But when it comes to shipping... man, I don't really care, y'know? Since the clones are all adults, this falls to me in the "ship and let ship" category, and I really lack the mental energy to get into the whole debate of what artist is writing/drawing what about people who, at the end of the day, are still nothing but [adult] fictional characters.

Because here's the deal: who really cares about how or with whom these characters are being shipped? "The children"? They shouldn't be looking at art marked as 18+ in an account that says "no minors". People (like myself) with squicks/triggers/traumas? Tags and blocking systems exist precisely to aid you with that. I use them and I love it. People that Don't Like that ship and want everyone to stop shipping it because they said so? Tags and blocking, again.

I didn't mean to soapbox on your ask, anon, and I'm not even defending Lychgate here bc I don't really care enough about him or this debate to do so tbh.

But I want to emphasize that I only appreciate these kind of warnings when they are about serious, actively damaging stuff, like me accidentally spreading crypto-terf posts bc they're disguised as feminism, or me having some creepy teen groomer's pokemon content on my blog bc they made a funny joke.

I know your intentions are good, but shipping discourse of adult ships is, in my particular opinion, not that important. I don't even ship clones, nor do I care when I see works in which they are shipped. I'm just... detached enough to see they are fictional characters that anyone can get to play with in their own sandbox the way they see fit, and that's none of my business.

That's my stance on adult ships of - and I repeat it - fictional characters. Again, this is not a dig at you or any other person squicked/triggered by clone shipping, nor is a pro clone shipping post. In fact, I'm not pro or against anything when it comes to adult ships - i'm over 30 and way too tired to be screaming about any of this anymore as I did in my teens. Now I just wanna sit here and vibe.

Thanks for the heads-up, and for the opportunity for me to talk about this. Please understand that I mean all of this in the most polite and cordial manner, and expect the same in any further communication between us that may follow. Good night and have a great rest of week.

#fandom talk #shipping discourse #clone shipping #clonecest #long post/ #anon #lychgate #clone discourse #please if any of u disagree with my stance you can just go you don't have to send a rude anon on your way out #we all get to curate our online experiences you don't have to bully me into sharing your opinions you can literally just unfollow ok #i wonder how many people will straight up skip the bit where i say i don't care abt clone shipping just to scream at me #that i'm a dirty inc*st supporter or whatever #read the thing for the love of god #anon ask

[dteamain]

Everyday I wake up happy I get to sit in the tent but not partake in the circus, I get backstage passes too!

Today I was even putting up some posters outside the main attraction

jay you are so brave for associating with me publicly atp😭

anyway the shit ass anons should know that i send every single one to the girliepops discord and we all laugh and make fun of them and then have a good time enjoying dteam and talking fanfic and making memes and sitting in call all day giggling while they are miserable in my askbox

like we have so much fun they should try actually enjoying dteam content

#jupiterthirdstar #love my girliepops (gender neutral) #also guys jay was one of the masterminds behind the dteam comparison posts today #we truly curated our own online experience today

[mortalityplays]

You need more free art.

I quit my job yesterday. Well, actually I quit my job eight weeks ago, but they finally released me yesterday for good behaviour. Don't get me wrong, I love what I do - but I do it for the wrong reasons. Working for major charities, you learn very fast that 'I want to make the world a better place' is a phrase you use to ask people for money, not to give them things. I was an ass-backwards fit for that world.

You need more free art. I need more free art. Everyone has felt the shift in our media landscape over the last ten years, away from access and towards nickel-and-diming the human experience. That lack of access is making life and culture worse for all of us, across the board. Paywalled news sites leave us less informed, attacks on the Internet Archive leave us less capable of research. Algorithmic social feeds and streaming walled gardens trap us inside smaller and smaller demographic bubbles, where we are increasingly only likely to encounter ideas that have been curated for us by marketing departments. Hasty efforts to resist AI commodification have only led to more artists locking their work away and calling for even more onerous systems of copyright law. This is not good for us.

We all need more free art.

So what am I going to do about it?

This is a question I have been asking myself for years. It's easy to sit here feeilng frustrated and thinking 'boy I hope SOMEONE does SOMETHING'. It's harder to take action in a world where I still have rent to pay. But hard doesn't mean impossible. Sometimes hard just means time-consuming, frustrating and slow. And sometimes it's worth doing something time-consuming, frustrating and slow because...I want to make the world a better place.

I'm going to do this:

1. From April 1st, I am relaunching as a freelance writer and editor.

This is the one that will (hopefully) help to pay the bills. I am a very good and experienced editor. I've worked on hollywood movies, I'm a member of the Chartered Institute of Editors and Proofreaders, I have clients who have been coming to me exclusively for more than 10 years.

Alongside bigger contract jobs, I am going to refocus on offering my services to small-press creators at a reduced rate. That means you, graphic novelists. That means you, itch and amazon writers. I want to help you develop your work, the same way I help large organisations. You can learn more about what an editor even does and what kind of pricing you can expect here.

2. I'm also going to start giving shit away. Like, constantly.

Next week I'm going to launch a new free shop. If you're unfamiliar, a free shop, giveaway shop, swap shop, etc. is an anarchist tradition of setting up a storefront where anyone can take what they like for no cost. Offline, this often means second-hand clothes, tools, furniture, food etc. Online, I am going to be giving away digital art. Copyright-free, no strings attached. It will (eventually) feature everything from print-res posters to zines, poems, tattoo flash, t-shirt designs and anything else we come up with.

Yes, I said 'we' - while this is a curated collection, it will feature work from a variety of credited and anonymous artists and activists, all of whom have agreed to give their work away to the public domain. Some of it will be practical, some of it will be political, but a lot of it will be decorative or personal. This is, in part, a response to recent difficulty I had finding somewhere that would print a one-off joke poster for a friend that featured the word 'faggot'. Enough. No middlemen - no explaining ourselves. Just print our shit and enjoy it.

I'm very, very excited about this project. I'll have more to say about it closer to the launch, but you can expect it to go live on March 27th.

2.2 I forgot to mention the ACTUAL LAUNCH GIVEAWAY

To celebrate my launch, I am going to be giving away a ton of physical prints. When I went looking for my old stock to see if it was worth setting a new (paid) storefront up, I realised I had way more old work in storage than I thought. This will be announced in its own right on Monday, but this is why I've been hinting you should go follow my Patreon.

On April 1st, I will pick 8 random patrons (from across all tiers including non-paying followers!) and mail them a bundle of assorted prints and postcards. The prize pool includes A3 and A4 posters, packs of A6 postcards, and printed minicomics that I've previously sold for up to £12 each.

You don't have to be a paying subscriber to enter - this is strictly no-purchase necessary. It is purely and entirely a celebration of the concept of GIVING ART AWAY FOR FREE.

3. PORN, YOU PERVERTS

Because I still have to pay to stay alive, I am going to be subsidising all this free art with the introduction of Fuck You Fridays. Starting from March 29th, I will drop a new 18+ short story on the last Friday of every month, over on itch.io (yes I know my page is desolate right now, don't worry I'll get there).

The first edition, Go Fuck Yourself, is about, well - telling your boss where to stick it. Julia has had it with her millionaire man-child manager, and is just about ready to let him know what she really thinks. It's a short and steamy 5k words, with a gorgeous cover illustration by @taylor-titmouse, and you can pick it up for $3 starting from March 29th.

4. ANOTHER BIG SURPRISE

I'm keeping this one under wraps for now, but April 1st will also play host to one more (FREE) launch. If you've been following me for a long time, you might remember the other significance of this date (no not April Fool's day, though that is certainly thematically relevant to this entire effort). That's all I'll say right now. Watch this space.

tl;dr: I'm sick of paywalls and career ladders. I'm literally putting my money where my mouth is. More free art for everyone and I'm not kidding around!!!

#announcement #please reblog let's make this HAPPEN

[daenerys-targaryen]

apparently tumblr is being flocked by twitter users because the site is dying before our eyes so hi, I welcome you with open arms. this site is not perfect. has its glitches and issues.

some tips:

if you reblog a post and have something to say, keep your comments in the tags.

reblog content you enjoy. reply (if op allows) to posts you like.

you can only post / reblog / queue 250 posts within each 24 hours.

you can only follow 5,000 people

send asks to people who you want to befriend.

you will inevitably become mutuals with a swiftie and or a destiel shipper, accept it.

you can’t have group chats on here like you can on twitter (they tried and well, failed) but you can still make plenty of friends on here without being in a groupchat.

participate in fandom things.

block who you want for whatever reason. curating your own online experience is important!

we celebrate the ides of march and also november 5th 2020.

we start celebrating halloween in july.

do you love the color of the sky? i hope so.

remember: this is my turf and you are now in my homeland.

#leah rambles #there are things i'm forgetting but that's the jist #welcome xoxo #greatest hits

[feminist-space]

Article by Fortesa Latifi:

"Being the child of an influencer, Vanessa tells me, was the equivalent of having a full-time job—and then some. She remembers late nights in which the family recorded and rerecorded videos until her mother considered them perfect and days when creating content for the blog stretched into her homeschooling time. If she expressed her unease, she was told the family needed her. “It was like after this next campaign, maybe we could have more time to relax. And then it would never happen,” she says. She was around 10 years old when she realized her life was different from that of other children. When she went to other kids’ houses, she was surprised by how they lived. “I felt strange that they didn’t have to work on social media or blog posts, or constantly pose for pictures or videos,” she says. “I realized they didn’t have to worry about their family's financial situation or contribute to it.”

Vanessa, who requested anonymity to speak freely about her family dynamics, says she helped create content for huge companies like Huggies and Hasbro when her mom landed endorsement deals. When she reached puberty and began menstruating, her mother had her do sponsored posts for sanitary pads. “It was so mortifying,” she says. “I just felt like I wanted to crawl into a hole and never come out.”

Being part of an influencer family changed everything about her life, Vanessa says. “Sometimes I didn’t know where the separation was between what was real and what was curated for social media.” And her mother’s online presence indelibly warped their relationship. “Being an influencer kid turned my relationship with my mom into more of an employer-employee relationship than a parent-child one,” she says. “Once you cross the line from being family to being coworkers, you can’t really go back.”

...

Khanbalinov has had zero new offers since he took his kids offline. “When we were showing our kids, brands were rolling in left and right—clothing companies, apps, paper towel companies, food brands. They all wanted us to work with them,” he says. “Once we stopped, we reached out to the brands we had lined up and 99 percent of them dropped out because they wanted kids to showcase their products. And I fought back, like, you guys are a paper towel company—why do you need a kid selling your stuff?”

The law has woefully lagged behind the culture here, but there’s signs that policymakers might finally be catching up. In 2023, in addition to Illinois, three other states—New York, Washington State, and New Jersey—proposed bills to protect influencer kids. Contrast that with the flurry of legislative activity in just the first two months of 2024. Seven more states—Maryland, Georgia, Ohio, Missouri, California, Arizona, Minnesota—have introduced similar legislation. Some of the bills are going one step further to protect the privacy of the kids featured in this content. In some states, proposed legislation would include a clause that borrows from a European legal doctrine known as the “right to be forgotten”—it would allow someone who was featured in content when they were a child to request that platforms permanently delete those posts. None of the current legislation introduced, however, would outright bar the practice of featuring minors in monetized content.

...

The movement on this issue was glacial for years, but it finally feels like the ice has thawed. Much of that progress is thanks to activists like Cam Barrett (she/they), a 25-year-old creator (@softscorpio) who uses TikTok to talk about her experience of being overshared in their childhood and adolescence. Barrett doesn’t go by her legal name anymore because of the online history it’s tied to. “I love my legal name,” Barrett tells me. “I just don’t love the digital footprint attached to it.” Last year, Barrett testified in front of the Washington State legislature as a proponent of a bill to protect influencer kids. This year, they testified again—this time, in front of the Maryland legislature.

“As a former content kid myself, I know what it’s like to grow up with a digital footprint I never asked for,” Barrett told the Maryland House of Delegates Economic Matters Committee in February. “As my mom posted to the world my first-ever menstrual cycle, as she posted to the world the intimate details about me being adopted, her platform grew and I had no say in what was posted.” And yet, Cam says her activism has been healing.

For Cam and other influencer children, getting a paycheck won’t give them back what they lost—a normal childhood unobstructed by the cameras pushed into their faces. But it could be the beginning of some version of restitution. “My friends say I’m fighting for little Cam,” she tells me. “It feels very healing because I didn’t have anyone to fight for me as a kid.”"

Read the full article here: https://www.cosmopolitan.com/lifestyle/a60125272/sharenting-parenting-influencer-cost-children/

#children of influencers #influencers #children's rights #social media #fortesa latifi

[deirdra-hearts-nadia]

I've been thinking about the fandom for The Arcana, and I have come to the conclusion that it's weird as hell. In my 20+ years participating in online fandom spaces, I've never seen a fandom quite like this one. I've seen drama, sure, but the core of most fandoms is a large community of people who love the same media and come together to celebrate it.

The Arcana fandom is not like that. From the very beginning we're more fractured, more factional, more fragile than most. You just have to look around at all the posts lamenting the death of the fandom every 2 weeks to see that something is really wrong here.

And I think a lot of it has to do with the nature of the canon. I am not saying this to criticize The Arcana, the devs, Dorian, or my fellow fans. I have just noticed that, as a piece of media, this game occupies a very unique space that is reflected in the way its fans interact with canon and with each other.

Welcome to the TED talk ain't none of y'all asked for.

Part of what makes this fandom unique is the evolution of fandom as a whole in the face of new types of media. As gaming becomes more mainstream and games themselves become more complex, the way we engage has necessarily changed in response.

Books/ movies/ shows are slightly more static in terms of canon than video games; canon is what it is and how you interact with what is there is largely to do with who you are. Everyone has the same base material to engage with, and that results in a certain amount of constancy. You can't interact with The Princess Bride in a way that changes the movie, only in ways that change your own perception. There isn't a whole lot of room for OCs without rewriting canon, so fans tend to consume OC-based fiction and art with the assumption that it's likely to be self-insert wish fulfillment fantasy time. That isn't always true, but there is a reason the term Mary Sue was coined.

Otome games and other choice-based video games make a very different fan environment, because the way you interact with canon is completely different. You have to build a character in order to interact with the story, and your choices directly impact your experience of canon.

But most western choice-based games are in the context of a larger RPG universe, e.g. Fallout or Dragon Age. There is a lot more to the story than the romance plot and so there's a lot more world to experience, contextualize, and build upon. There's certainly plenty of unhinged ShepxGarrus erotica, but there's also an abundance of fanworks that engage with the plot, the worldbuilding, and the canon characters with relatively little of the player's character needing to be on the page at all.

By contrast, most otome games that make it to English-speaking fandom spaces are Japanese. The romance is the point, but we also start from a place of wariness of our fellow fans. Because there's a huge difference between "harmless weeb" and "orientalist fetishizing creepo," and you know going in that both ends of the spectrum are possible, there is an amount of caution. We curate our space, looking for the creators who align with our expectations and values before we ever begin to interact.

The Arcana falls in a very unique and odd space because it is an otome, but made by Americans, with an attempt at a diverse fantasy cast. It's intended to be for American/ English-speaking audiences and is marketed as such. But making a romance game in America is challenging. Our way of approaching online media, especially smartphone-accessible media, is super fucked up, right? We are constantly trapped between the dichotomies of moral duty (Must Protect The Children) versus appealing to the customer base (Boom Anime Babes with Tig Ol Bitties). Because this is a mobile game, the developers can't make money if the game is removed from the app store, so they want it to be rated teen at the most. But the enticing bit, the thing that captures a potential fan's attention, is the flirtation and sexy implications. So from the jump they're in a weird space purely because they chose to make a mobile game instead of an indie video game released on Steam or similar.

So now you have an inherently split audience: mature adults who know they're getting into a potentially explicit romance game, and young adults/teens who have grown up in a more insulated internet culture where normal words are replaced with Orwellian doublespeak, like "unalive" and "spicy time".

THEN you add in the fact that the developers tried to build a diverse fantasy world, which is a fantastic idea both from an inclusionary standpoint and a broader audience standpoint. But because they didn't employ any actual sensitivity readers (did they think they didn't need them because fantasy can't have racism? Did they justify it as not being in the budget? Would love to know what's going on there) they fell right into a lot of the classic traps. We've been over these time and again, so I won't get into them here. Suffice to say, there has been Discourse. The presence of those issues means that more experienced fans will see those things and call them out, and that criticism causes even more of a split: the zealous apologists versus the critics. And critics can fall into two further categories: those who love the canon and want to see it do better, and the bitches who just love having something to bitch about.

Unfortunately, this combination means that there are inherently factions to this fandom, with staunchly opposed approaches to the media. So even before you enter a fandom space, it's already wildly fractured simply because of the nature of base canon.

THEN add to that the fact that this game is a dating sim. And to engage with a dating sim, you have to build a character and make choices based on that character. Some people will approach this work as storytelling, and some will approach it as an escapist expression of self. Neither of these ways of engaging with canon is wrong. Enjoying a dating sim as Me But Better is fun and completely valid! Engaging with a dating sim as a storyteller collaborating with the developers is fun and completely valid! But the two approaches are opposed in purpose, and that can make it difficult for the two types of fans to engage with one another's work.

Storytellers will well and truly invest in building a character. They may even build out communities, countries, cultures, and languages to make their world all the richer. They are investing hours of blood, sweat, and tears into Their Craft, pouring themselves into an opus of quality fanwork. Unfortunately, this can sometimes lead to big feelings. Fan artists and writers may feel underappreciated if all they get out of their hard work is 2 likes and a gif of a wolf making AWOOGA eyes. They may feel that critique of their work is unwarranted, or that there's no point creating if no one will engage.

The romantics will engage with canon and fanwork from the perspective that "this is my fantasy romance time". Their OC isn't so much Original Character as Optimized Characteristics--that is, their perfect self. They are here for wish fulfillment fun times in the relative privacy and anonymity of the internet, and good for them! But that may mean that criticism of canon or their fan work feels excessively personal--it is very hard to detach the ego from the OC when that OC is a projection of your best self. They may view any critique as a personal attack as opposed to a good-faith attempt at engagement or conversation. This can lead to defensiveness, or to leaving the fandom outright if it feels too hostile.

Unfortunately all of these factions cause rifts in the community. This sometimes turns into fandom vigilantism, where people begin to see any fan who doesn't wholeheartedly agree with them as an enemy. I've seen friends experience bullying and cruelty over their OCs and their art. I've seen predators use the isolated nature of the fandom to further isolate and prey upon already vulnerable individuals. I've seen some really shitty stuff.

But I have also seen beautiful community flourish. I've made friends who feel more like family than my actual relatives. I've seen people work through struggles and overcome deliberate attempts to tear us apart, finding forgiveness and friendship along the way. I've seen myself and others grow because of the community and inspiration we found here. And I saw all of that because I found my people. And I hope, Arcana fandom, that the rest of you can find your people too.

#the arcana #oops i did a ted talk #fandom discourse #the arcana fandom

[chubs-deuce]

Hello!!! Love love LOVE your Charlastor and Hazbin artwork; your art is amazing!!

I have a feww questions if you’re comfortable with answering them (no worries if not) :D

I love hearing people’s music recommendations, so I was wondering if you listen to music whilst you draw and if there’s any songs in particular that make you think of the characters and/or the ship?

Also, I get a bit nervous posting about Charlastor because of some of the hate it gets in the fandom and because some of my irl classmates who follow me don’t like the ship (and don’t know I like it), so I was wondering what your general mindset is when you post your art online, but also what your mindset is like when posting Charlastor art, knowing what the fandom can be like?

Finallyy, I wanted to ask if you’ve read Under My Skin by whamagram on AO3 and if you have, what are your thoughts on it? It’s a mature slowburn Radiobelle fic and only has a few chapters out so far, but it’s updated pretty regularly and has become my new favourite at the moment! I highly highly recommend it because it’s super well-written, really witty, and really understands the characters. It’s all about Charlie nursing Alastor back to health after the final battle in season 1 and it’s just so well done!!

Again, just want to say that I really really love your work and thank you for sharing it! I especially love how you draw expressions and the way you draw characters and their emotions feels so real. Seeing your illustrations inspires me to keep practicing with my own art!

Omg thank you so much for this lovely ask?!!

I'd be more than happy to answer all of these actually! :D

I am, in fact, the kind of person who looooves finding songs that fit certain characters or ships and make whole playlists over time if I find enough of them, so here's some that made me think of Charlastor (links are all spotify):

- Glass Piano, by Kathleen

- Daisy Bell, and specifically this scuffed computer sung version bc it hits better

- bored like me, by dodie

- Ended with the Night, by Caravan Palace

- I Don't Want To Set The World On Fire, by The Ink Spots

- I Can't Decide, by Scissor Sisters

I have yet to really find more songs specific to the characters as individuals tho lol

----------

As for your next question...

This isn't my first rodeo in the unpopular non-canon het presenting ship club, so there's a few things I like to remind myself of when I feel that people pleaser anxiety sneaking up on me:

1)

if people truly wanted to avoid content of the ship, they'd block the tags. Maybe kindly ask your friend to block the charlastor and radiobelle tags bc you want to post about them? This way they're not forced to see what they dislike and you get to have your harmless fun. If they're opposed to this, question why. It's not your job to curate *their* online experience, they do have all the necessary tools at their disposal.

2)

I consider the source material like a toy box. You can play with the dolls in it like the packaging intended for you to, but there's no rules dictating that you can't play *your* way if that's more fun to you.

Canon is in my eyes the preferred suggestion, but not the law - don't we all just smush the heads of dolls together making kissy noises in our minds at the end of the day?

A lot of people sadly treat shipping like it's a battle for author validation, when in reality it was always just a way to playing with hypotheticals and exploring the world and characters canon offered us in new and interesting ways... I hate the attitude some people have about canonicity. Imo, as long as you're not acting like your non-canon ship should be canon and shit on other ships in the process, you're not doing any harm.

Now... Canon sexualities and having contrary headcanons are a tricky road to travel because there's so much emotional investment in the canon representation of often overlooked or mishandled minority groups, and this is the biggest anti argument I've seen get thrown around, since Charlastor as a ship not only splits up the canon lesbian pairing, but also alters Alastor's canon sexuality to make the ship work.

What's important here is that you handle it respectfully - i.e. don't be a dick and go around acting like your preferred ideas are better and should be canon or whatever. Attitude is important, respect canon for what it is and embrace the fact that your ship is not. It's not a detriment! It just means we have to make all of our own content lol.

I personally headcanon Alastor as demisexual/demiromantic not only because it still fits under the aspec umbrella, but also because I myself am both of those things and enjoy messing with the characters and narrative using a dynamic I have a lot of personal experience with! It's fun to hit someone as haughty and stubbornly emotionally detached as Alastor with a flurry of unexpected, unwanted feelings and struggling to navigate them.

Do I want that to be canon? Absolutely not! I'm just having fun with my imaginative toys in my own corner of the internet lol.

Also for the record, I think Chaggie is cute and they should absolutely stay together, I just don't find them interesting enough to explore further in the realm of fanfiction and art :'D

Ultimately I'm a strong believer of "I can post whatever I want forever", if anyone has an issue with it and the given tools at their disposal aren't enough to deal with it, they're free to unfollow and/or block me! I don't need anyone's approval to have harmless fun with my artistic and writing skills where I don't bother anyone, and that's imo always what should be at the core of creating just about anything.

----------

OH ALSO I KNOW THAT FIC AND IT'S SOO GOOODDDD I DROP EVERYTHING TO GO READ IT WHENEVER A NEW CHAPTER DROPS

I try my best to leave comments under it wherever I can too bc it genuinely scratches like every itch I have about this ship so well-

The comedy is on point, the dialogue feels so solidly in-character and the pacing and the overall concept just work perfectly!!

10/10 concur as a great recommendation lol

----------

QWQ again, thank you so much for taking the time to type out this lovely ask, I really do appreciate it and the compliments also absolutely made my day!!

I hope you keep having as much fun with this ship as I am, take care!! <3

#chubs answers #charlastor #radiobelle #long post

[sgiandubh]

Hi, I don't know if you understand me or go through this, I would like to know your feeling about it.

After all this circus (which I can't take anymore and after a few years in the fandom) I can't stand Caitríona anymore. I swear I try, I swear I try to get excited about her projects. I swear I try to understand her reasons, her anger, her antipathy towards us all these years. For a long time I managed to suppress this sad feeling I feel for her, but now it screams. I can not anymore.

On the other hand, I still support Sam, even more than I should, because he, along with her, plays the main role in the narrative and is not a saint. I think these feelings would be the signal to leave the ship. I no longer admire her, I no longer miss her, at least on social media, I no longer even want to see her face.

I feel bad for feeling this way, I don't know what to do. Have you ever felt like that? And before you start offending me, I'll tell you: I'm not anti, only or whatever. I am someone who paid a lot of attention to this narrative and ended up hurt, very hurt by them, by her specially…

Dear Feel Bad Anon,

I was just about to go to bed after a very, very long and dense day, but your question stopped me in my tracks. Story of my life, really: that banging on the dorm's door at midnight ('it's vile X, we just broke up, help') - ah, the memories. So, I will not let you down.

First of all, thank you for this ask. It is a genuine one, I know it. It takes a lot of honesty to write it down without cackle, hysteria and the everlasting 'they owe me' refrain (no, they don't owe anybody anything, because, Anon, do you owe anybody anything when you are that much in love? I am sure you don't give a hoot about Aunt Y and Neighbor Z, Anon, and fuck them and their curiosity, eh?). And, my goodness, you really do sound exhausted, here.

Take a good look at this pic I took in Mandalay (see post below) of a Yama Zatdaw (Ramayana) puppet show:

All these public ten years are summed up in here: the puppeteers (TPTB), the puppets (S&C) and the convenient prop ( T) in the middle.

Where are the private ten years? I could think of this Amarapura pic, taken the day after the puppet show:

And that is ok, Anon. It's them. Their lives. Their love. We are just peepers through a keyhole, in here: let's try and do it gracefully.

You don't like C anymore? S couldn't give a damn about how you feel, Anon, and forgive me if I sound brutal. He loves her and he already did the unthinkable for her. C does give a damn about you, however. Not because she cares about you, but because she probably thinks your intelligence and your questioning endanger her narrative and put at risk all the negotiated perks. This is why she thought intelligent to bark at you and publicly insult you: by a simple zealot reflex, her part of the bargain. It has nothing to do with her private truth. You are disappointed by a puppet, not the real C. Or, using this time Plato's Allegory of the Cave, you are mad at the silhouettes reflected on the walls of that cave, not at the people whose reflections you see - those people are outside the cave.

Get out of that mental cave, Anon. Stop racking your brains off trying to give definitive answers that cannot be honestly given with the amount of information we have. Stop obsessing about a visibly curated social media presence, online times and all this shit - they mean very little, especially at this point in time. Trust your heart and your intuition. Trust your life experience. Trust yourself, not me. All this side of the fandom can offer you is based on our own life paths and street smarts. Do I think it's legit? Of course, otherwise I'd not be here or I'd be a pervert. Do I think that together we'd be a step closer to what really is? Oh, by all means. But you are the only sovereign master of the course, here. You are the only one able to choose between believing or rejecting, staying on deck or jumping ship.

I chose to be interested in the puppeteers, Anon. The paper trail. The minute intricacies. The boring details Mordor does not want to see or doesn't know how to translate in simple English. That is really what keeps me going and that is something I will never publicly trade. The more I look into it, the clearer the picture is. Oh, for sure, I take great pleasure in seeing and discussing the script inconsistencies - don't we all? But to me and as I see it, this is the tip of the iceberg. The bar I set myself for public happenings, statements and all the shit show is very low. It avoids undue disappointment and even allows me to be relaxed about it. Not always. Not a perfect strategy. But it is my way of managing it and so far, it works.

Take at least a day off Tumblr. Think of it as detox. I can guarantee you will see it way clearer. I wish you well, Anon. And I really hope my long, long answer helped at least a little bit.

#anon #fandom #shitshow

[idon-kno]

HEY YOU!!!!

Yeah! You! The dork who is feeling feelings about the latest pd episode!

I'm Anti! And I've got the coolest prime defenders server ever!

https://discord.com/invite/XHHY5w3GfY

Are you feeling like you are about to explode with information? TALK ABOUT IT HERE!!!

It's a wonderful little place where you can talk to others who love prime defenders!

We have everything! Fan artists! Fic writers! Cosplayers!

Not fully caught up?

No problem! We have a liveblogging channel for folks who aren't fully caught up yet!

(Warning- spoilering text about pd is actively discouraged in every channel other than liveblogging. Enter at your own risk, there are spoilers in every channel other than liveblogging)

Our VCs are insane. We have created multiple abominations in this place.

We have small spaces for the other jrwi campaigns but they aren't the main focus of the server.

New to discord or feel nervous about joining? I pride myself in making the server a place that isn't overly complicated or overwhelming.

(disclaimer- half the server will say hi to you upon joining. This is normal. We get excited.)

Unfortunately I will say that we do not and will not create a blacklist for any topics. It is a public space and it is not other people's responsibility to curate anyone else's online experience. If you are worried about something that triggers you is a common topic, please! DM me and I'll tell you if the trigger is commonly brought up and you can choose if the server is a place that you feel safe and comfortable staying in

JOIN!!! (IF YOU LIKE)

https://discord.com/invite/XHHY5w3GfY

Mallard Frogway (the server pic) by our lovely @ollylotl

#jrwi #jrwi prime defenders #prime defenders #jrwi show #jrwi pd #just roll with it

[nailgunstigmata]

i couldnt fall asleep and spent the last few hours watching tiktoks of people pretending to be wolves so i probably cant articulate this well rn but i think theres something deeply sad about how much of not just fandom but life in general is done with ironic detachment nowadays. a kind of plausible deniability of feeling anything at all. and i catch myself doing this too!! its just a lot easier to not be vulnerable and earnest online. baring ur soul in front of anyone is terrifying because ur always giving them the opportunity to hurt u when u do it

like even with this post a part of my brain is going ok its not that deep omg but like. maybe it is that deep. maybe the things we do and say and the way we navigate the world matters even in an online space about a sitcom. maybe everything can have meaning and we should be careful of what we are saying and listen to other people and try to be nice to each other because theres already plenty of cruelty in the world

and again i have the internet socialised part of my brain screaming at me that this is cringe and nobody cares but again thats stupid. like thats stupid. nobody is being held at gunpoint to read my dumb rambles and if people mock my words thats their personal failure and not mine. u just have to kinda not listen and be earnest anyways and be comforted by the fact that this mindset of self denial isnt healthy for anyone. u cant be detached and happy those two things are mutually exclusive and irony is a thing that can genuinely poison you. like im speaking from experience i literally have the same kind of brainrot and i think that most people have it, especially gen z since we grew up on the internet and started curating the way people perceive us online way too soon. like yeah theres a point where u only know the self that exists to be perceived and that sucks i think.

mocking others vulnerability is fun and safe but it cant make you happy. the only thing that can is being genuine and open and vulnerable. its scary but its the only way. what im trying to say is that the live laugh love girlies were kinda onto something (minus the christian fundamentalism) and we are gradually spiraling into a world in which nothing is real and everything is a commodity and the only way to save ur soul is to be genuine and earnest with people u love and with the world in general. lets cling to our humanity as capitalism alienates us and keeps us trapped in a perpetual cycle of dissatisfaction so we can consume and be consumed forever and ever while giving just enough to keep the engine pumping. im not saying that actively trying to be earnest is the antidote for capitalism but i do think it helps salvage our humanity. and i do think its the only way to be happy

#like yeah idk ill always be a person that feels things deeply and gets emotional about dumb things #and ive learned to grow a hard shell over my feelings that im still trying to whittle down #and even now its like. why am i saying over dumb things? why am i doing that to myself #theres no such thing as being emotional over a dumb thing because being emotional is never stupid. its good and important #this isnt sunny fandom specific just something ive noticed online #idk. and even in person. tho its worse online ofc because #further detachment via screen etc #i should sleep

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

incredibly low stakes and online aita post; ☁ to find it later.

aita for blocking a person on discord without telling them why?

so, i like the occasional online rp, and was hankering for a new one, so i found a tumblr blog that posts people searching for rps to do. i interacted with a post that seemed interesting, and the blogger and i talked briefly in ims. they seemed okay, and they liked me, so we shared discords to continue talking and plotting our rp.

as the conversation progressed in discord, i started getting some bad vibes from this person. nothing too bad, just things i kind of disliked. for instance, they shared some political opinions that we did not see eye-to-eye on, details of how they lost their virginity, and would get upset if i "took too long to respond". mind you, this is the first time we met. there were some smaller things as well, vague preferences or how they worded things that irked me, but not as big of deals. basically, this stuff kind of piled up as the convo progressed, i decided i wouldnt have fun rping with them, and i ended up blocking them.

i did not communicate to them that any of the stuff they were doing bothered me. i did not encourage them to overshare information about their political preferences or sexual experiences, nor did i tell them afterwards that it made me uncomfortable - although i did try to change the topic of conversation. i simply stopped responding for while, they send in several messages trying to egg me to respond (to the tune of "are you there???" "??????" "hellooooo???" "dude, you cant just ghost me like this" "i see you online") over the course of around 20 mins., and then i hit the block button.

shortly after that happened, they started messaging me on tumblr again calling me "petty", "immature", and telling me to "eat shit and die". i then blocked them on tumblr. lmao.

so! i get i might have been the asshole because i didnt communicate with them well enough. however! i am a big fan of curating online spaces. i love blocking people. i also love it when other people block me, if they dislike me, because i dont want to interact with people i dislike, nor ones that dislike me. i have been in their shoes before (being blocked by some random person online who i had just met basically) and my reaction to it is "lmao". i genuinely dont care that much. i then get on with my life because i dont think it matters. i get feeling super bad if you were good friends with the person and knew them for a while, but we werent. we had just met. i dont think the level of betrayal was high enough to make me blocking them a huge emotional turmoil. i wouldnt have given this a second thought until they sent me the messages calling me a pos afterwards.

if it helps any, this all took place earlier tonight. i liked the post this morning, they reached out to me this afternoon, we talked in tumblr ims for about 10 mins., then discord for about 1 hour, i stopped responding for 30 mins. whilst they spammed me with requests to reply, i blocked them, then about 5 mins later they sent me the tumblr ims. i knew them for only a few hours. also we are both over 18, although im older by about 4 years and, frankly, i think their immaturity showed in our convo lol.

so, aita for blocking a person without telling them why beforehand? thanks for reading ✌

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

[lauramkaye]

PSA

If you mock someone for some harmless* thing that brings them joy, you are being an asshole.

*seeing something on social media that you don't enjoy is not harmful. It is your responsibility to use the tools available to you in order to curate your own online experience.

Cynicism, mockery, cruelty, apathy - these are corrosive, and they damage the people that use them just as much as the people they are used against. The more you try to chip away at someone else's joys, the more you damage your own ability to experience joy. It's a process of corruption.

So often, the things we are most inclined to mock and attack in others are reflections of the parts of ourselves that we are most ashamed of. The cruelest people are often the people that hate themselves the most, who fear themselves the most, and are desperate to direct attention on others to save themselves from being the targets of the same hatred that they so freely spread.

Just as it's easy to learn these patterns of behavior, you can also unlearn them. Do it in phases.

When you see something and want to say something about how cringe/embarrassing/whatever that thing is:

Think whatever you want, but don't post about it.

Once you've broken the habit of reflexively posting, practice thinking "I don't enjoy X, but that person does. That's okay, I don't have to do/enjoy X just because someone else does."

Next thought to practice: "I may not enjoy X, but that person does. Good for them to have something that they enjoy."

Next thought to practice: "It's nice to see positivity and excitement and creativity. Everyone deserves to have hobbies they love."

And then: "What is it about X that they like so much? They seem to be drawn to the bright colors/happy endings/emotional tone/pretty people."

And then: "You know, I think I might like Y for similar reasons that they like X. I prefer a neutral color palette and subtle textures while they seem to like very bright colors and bold textures, but we are both enjoying the aesthetics of the art. Well met, fellow art enjoyer. I'm happy each of us was able to find some art that fits our taste."

And then sometimes after a while: "You know what, I haven't thought about this in a long time, but one of my friends used to make fun of this hot pink sparkly notebook I had when I was in school. I really loved that notebook, it made me feel happy to use it, but after my friend said those things I threw it away, and then I started making fun of other people with similar ones so my friend would think I was cool. It's sad that something that made me happy once got turned into a weapon I used to make other people unhappy. I'm glad I don't do that anymore."

Then you get yourself another pink sparkly notebook. And you use it. And you let it make you happy. And a little sore place in your heart that's been festering heals.

#cringe culture is dead #taste and morality are not connected #the things you like do not define you as a person

[theresattrpgforthat]

I saw in the tags of a recent post you mentioned wanting to talk about safety tools—would love to hear your thoughts, especially re: learning and teaching them!

Hello friend!

Oh my gosh, where to start. I love safety tools and I think they can really enhance the game experience, especially when you are trying out tabletop games with a group of people you don't know very well. While it's great if you have a solid group of friends that are all interested in playing games together, a lot of tabletop gamers have to find a group first, and then make new friends along the way.

Entering a new environment is already scary, and entering an environment where you are expected to pretend to be somebody else is even scarier. You're showing a group of strangers a little bit of who you are - and they're doing the same thing. Not only that, improvising a narrative as you go has the potential to visit a wide range of topics - many of which might accidentally trigger a traumatic memory or an innate fear. (I might be preaching to the choir, but best to lay some ground work.)

So, safety tools. I usually layer a number of them into my games, because each tool serves a different use. I usually begin a new game or Session 0 with a quick review of each safety tool, including the X-Card by John Stavropoulos, Lines and Veils by Ron Edwards, The Open Door Policy as introduced by The Gauntlet, and something we call Check-Ins, which are a combination of tools found in Thirsty Sword Lesbians, as well as the Script Change safety tool by Beau Jágr Sheldon. Check-Ins work as follows: if a player is unsure about whether or not the thing they want to try is ok with the group, they can check in. The group then has a chance to rewind, alter play, or give the player a go-ahead. In return for checking in, the player who asked the group is rewarded with a point of XP. For our group, we have decided to edit the Lines and Veils to include Lures as well, Lures being elements that the players are excited to see in the game.

If the group is a group that has played with me before, or if we are playing multiple sessions in a campaign, I'll ask the members of the group to tell us about a safety tool that we use. Sometimes players will even bring forward a safety tool that we haven't used before! Each player who can tell us something about the safety tools we use at the table is rewarded with a point of XP, or something else useful to use in play. We also try to provide examples of what using a safety tool might look like for folks who aren't familiar with the concept.

Not every safety tool works with every group. I would love to use the Support Flower, for example, but I mostly run games online, and haven't found a good way to implement it. But there's many more options than just the ones I provided! If you would like to see a comprehensive list of possible safety tools, I recommend the curated list as provided by TheGiftofGabes on Itch.io.

#asks #safety tools #mint speaks #what I really love is that my friend group is starting to use safety tools outside of games as well #we don't feel obligated to stay if we're not feeling comfortable #so we'll just use the Open Door for any gathering #and sometimes if we're talking about something that is upsetting for someone #that person will say “I'm X-carding this conversation” #and we just move on

[wingzie]

Hi.

Your experience as a Jikookers is the same as the experience of Taekookers. Extreme shippers fighting and having meltdowns on the TL make a lot of people equate the unit name with these behaviors.

Sadly the first thought that came to my mind when Jimin mentioned JK is that tkk would make a scene about it. Instead of just feeling relief they are doing well, or just comfort we're getting news, I felt dread. And the worst is I was right.

I'm really struggling with the state of the fandom now, especially twitter fandom. People say you just have to curate your online experience and most sane armys are just taking a break from SNS and everything will get better once the guys start coming back from MS. I'm not this optimistic.

I've been thinking finding fellow ARMY irl could be better. But there's still a good chance to meet someone you would block straight away online.

I'm not a very social person. I used to come online to find people remisniscing, celebrating, sharing.. There's always been hating but now it feels like it's only hating (and comparing numbers). There was a clear shift from COVID on. It's not just solo endeavors and MS. You said it, how the way to handle things has changed.

I don't know how to fend off all the negativity any more than I know how to casually meet ARMY offline. I dream of an ARMY community manager, of a campaign about mental heal, abusive relationships (how many think they know better than the members what's good for them and think they are actually showing love and support when they are just being abusive), how to make the parasocial relationship a positive thing, etc.... A lot of these people who make ARMY spaces unbreathable actually need help.

Hi Anon! I'm sorry you feel this way. I feel like some Army experienced feelings of anger or betrayal since the Festa Dinner, which has made them unfairly lash out on the members. Some cannot cope that we lost an aspect of control, but this has always been the members decision and we have to accept that with respect. As I said in my other post, the heart of Army is massively the same. Just this morning I saw a Tweet about the Purple Ocean from Muster and it reminded me of the Flashlight project during PTD. There will ALWAYS be discourse online. That is the reason for it's existence. I am in other fandoms and they all suffer from the same issues since Covid and Elon. However, for every "bad" person or post, there are plenty of good ones out there. If you look for then. I mentioned to someone yesterday that it's like when people always leave awful reviews for a bad meal, but very rarely mention when they have a good meal. That's why I always try to find a balance. Both Jimin and Namjoon have told us over the years to not engage with negativity and I have always taken those words to heart. Things in online spaces have changed, but I guess I am more of a fighter and optimist. For each negative post I see, I spend more time posting/repositing posts that spread positivity or praise. I see no point in boosting some random February 2024 account sprewing hate. We have to be responsbile or our own spaces and I DO think things will improve once Jin returns. There's still that shared joy and excitement whenever a member posts or content comes out. It's just that the negative is less contained than it used to be. As for events offline. My first event was for a local screening of one of the concerts. I then attended a few events for members Birthday's. With the HYYH anniversay coming up, maybe you could look into seeing if there's any events for it? It's also Sope's Birthday soon and I plan to go to events for each of their Birthday's, so that could also be an option. However, if you dont' feel comfortable going in person, then that is perfectly acceptable. I'm sure there will be no judgement! We all have our own ways. For example, I always buy a mini cake for each members' Birthday haha. Though I had some negative experiences offline, there have been some really good ones. That's just how things are and then you can take the steps to protect yourself afterwards. I'm actually going to another event with the same group I mentioned before. If it doesn't go well, then I will just leave. If things have improved, then I will stay and enjoy myself. I understand it's not easy though, especially when we have certain expectations. Please do look after yourself though and feel free to DM me if you wish to discuss further. Much Love Wingzie/Becca