stfu-ariahna

[stfu-ariahna]

To my hard-headed barista...

The flush in your face when you’re deeply feeling an emotion. Happiness, sadness, anger. We all know that warmth. That feeling is just seamlessly flowing from your head. Long and frizzy due to your stress. Raging in its vibrant color. Signifies our relationship, something that’s slowly burning. Not ready for the flame to disappear in the air but also too scared to reach out and get burned. I feel like I’m so cold you’ll melt me if I let you in. I’ll evaporate and be flown away in the air from the smoke of your own flame. I’m blue and you’re red but I don’t think you’re ready to make purple.

#i dont fucking know #he makes me feel things #i hate men #love #someone kill me #i want him to kiss me #make a move dammit #first poem #first poetry post #poem #poetry #freewritting #freestyle #free write

[stfu-ariahna]

i’ve started replacing “i want to die” with “i feel overwhelmed” in my internal monologue, which is usually more accurate and more productive

[stfu-ariahna]

[stfu-ariahna]

How to win in 2021.

Your circle. Literally cull all the annoying friends, people that drain you, family members who are toxic. Become unavailable to them. This is so important because toxic energy has the power to bring you down and distract you from your main focus. More on that…

Your focus. Get crystal clear on your goals for 2021. Write dates, break your goals down into actions, affirm, pray on them, and give thanks for the blessings you’re about to receive.

Quit being the victim, see the wider perspective. There’ll always be something you need to work on within yourself, whether it’s jealousy, insecurities, laziness. Whatever it is. Learn how to unlearn your shit from the past, those traits need not enter this new year.

Keep your vibe high. You see how good you feel when you’re shaking your ass in the mirror to that song that hits you deep. That energy there. Tap into it everyday. Do whatever necessary that makes you feel on fire.

Be of service. Do you know how many people out there could be blessed with your gifts, feeding the homeless, writing regularly, sharing beautiful music, art, words, talents. The world needs you. So don’t forget to give back.

[stfu-ariahna]

SOPHIA WEBSTER Chiara Embroidered Butterfly Sandals, Nude In Pink.

[stfu-ariahna]

remember to let your feelings in. give yourself permission to let down all your walls, let go of your tensed chest and the tears stuck in your throat, cry, scream and feel everything. if you always have your guard up, to protect yourself or be strong for others, at least be vulnerable with yourself. your feelings matter and i learned that you need to let yourself feel everything without restraint in order to feel truly okay again. you deserve to be vulnerable with yourself and have a sense of home in you where you won’t judge and invalidate everything you naturally feel. you deserve to have a better relationship with yourself, and see your sensitivity and emotions as something to accept and embrace, rather than something to be mechanically fixed or shut away at the back of your mind. as long as it’s lodged there, unable to be expressed, it will always feel like there’s something wrong. give yourself the freedom to feel painful things and fulfil your pain’s natural course. you will allow yourself to process it and heal from it.

[stfu-ariahna]

Your life is only as good as your mindset. Check yourself often.

[stfu-ariahna]

Another night filled of anxiety and tears. Maybe it’s the medicine I’m on or maybe it’s me. Everything is still a huge blur. I just want to be okay. I just want peace. I just want a hug. Today I’ve had the most kindest soul pray for me and god I almost fell to the floor. Everyday is a struggle and I don’t want to give up but it seems so easy to do that than keep dragging myself along.

[stfu-ariahna]

Everything is repeating. I’m always crying or holding in tears. I’m drowning with anxiety when I’m around the people and friends who show me the most love and support. My days are muddled and just a big pile of mush. I’m hurting and I don’t know how to cope or even know what’s wrong. I want a hug, one that’s longer than a minute, a hug where I can just cry, please god.

#mental health #mental illness #depressing shit #depressing post #i'm sad #i’m stressed #don’t know what to do #don’t know what i’m doing #student #college #reflecting

[stfu-ariahna]

[stfu-ariahna]

deeply missing the rituals of elementary school

[stfu-ariahna]

yes im always a little sick to my stomach with anger and rage. why do u ask?

[stfu-ariahna]

Sometimes you need to fall apart so you can rebuild yourself the way you wish you had been.

[stfu-ariahna]

(Credit: notsosmalltalk.com)

[stfu-ariahna]

Got to the half way point of my goal of notes. Couldn’t finish since I was getting sleepy. But at least I kept it organized! :)

#coffeeshop #notes #midliners #study #student #college #university #biology #sophomore #coffee #coffeshop #cafe #studyblr #aesthetic #chill #calm #vibes

[stfu-ariahna]

Trying to study for my exam and midterm :)

#studyblr #study #vibe #chill #relax #coffee #ice coffee #coffee lover #student #college #university #exams #midterm

[stfu-ariahna]

It’s 12:02 in the afternoon, the weather has been cloudy for a couple of days and theres a high of 43 today. I have about 15 minutes before I have to rush to class and I’m in my local cofee shop. Its slow business as locals come in and out, I’m warm, cozy and relaxed. Jazz music is playing softly in the bacground. I have a huge crush on my barista, Patrick. He’s one of the few people I look forward to seeing in my daily rountine. I havent been here in weeks because they had to cut their hours. I woke up early just so I could see him. He’s says that he missed seeing me around. If he only knew.

#love #coffee #study #studyblr #coffeeshop #barista #college #university #student