#also…. since i finally got to draw naruto in his 20s….. look.. look at his sun spots ^.^ just. just like kushina…. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

captnjacksparrow · 3 years

Text

SNS Dynamics - Sasuke's Perspective

Lengthy post ahead

On completing my rewatch of Naruto part I and part II, many things which never made sense started to make sense. One among them is the relationship between Naruto and Sasuke. I used to ask why Naruto is going so far for Sasuke. And why Sasuke is helping out Naruto even though he wants to kill him. And I used to think that Episode 478 was retconned to make the final battle ends in a draw and Sasuke somehow made to reconcile with the titular character. Yet, I instinctively felt, ‘Something is very different about them’. But on careful rewatch, all the clues which consolidate their relationship was there. The way they love each other is totally on a different level and the creator very carefully planned this from the beginning of the Manga.

Though I really don’t like the ending for making every characters into a child rearing machine at an age of 20 to make way for an abomination called ‘Boruto’, I still loved everything till Episode 479.

I wanted to discuss about both Naruto and Sasuke's perspective. But that cannot be accommodated in a single post. So, I decided to start with Sasuke. Since Naruto's side of SNS is very open and vocal, we clearly knew what is going on in his mind. But Sasuke's side is usually very subtle but much more intense than Naruto which makes it worth analyzing.

Before getting to that, for most of the characters in the Naruto universe (I mean 99%), Sasuke is a person who looks cool, aloof, rude, overbearing, blunt, genius and emotionless. And that’s the truth. Except for Itachi and Naruto. So when I say he is rude or arrogant, it is from the people’s POV. And since I always see myself in Itachi, I see Sasuke as that adorable innocent child who is very honest but forgiving.

I strongly feel that Sasuke has some innocent enchantment towards Naruto ever since he lost his family which later transcended into a bond which cannot be put under Friendship or Bromance. Enchantment, here I meant by, is not in a sexual way but more like the unconscious need to be in the presence of other person. Like walking beside each other eternally. Or even warming up next to a campfire near a chilly beach. You don’t want to fall into the fire but just enjoy the warmth. It maybe totally a platonic love like many claims to be. But his absolute disinterest in any other characters (even just as a friend) and the following traits he shows only to Naruto are clearly not just distinctive of platonic love either. It’s completely beyond platonic.

The following are the traits which Sasuke shows only towards Naruto, could have been avoided or delegated to other characters if the creator really wanted to assert their relationship as just friendship. There are lot of subtexts and emotions which I cannot accept it under the guise of bromance or friendship. It’s just not possible. If someone you like shows all these traits to another person, you should stop thinking about that person and move on.

The traits are :

Preferential Treatment

Attentive

Protective

My body moved on its own

One and Only

Powerful Eyes

Unconscious Closeness

Preferential Treatment

This is the very basic and first thing you show to someone whom you love. Meaning, I will treat this person much different from everyone else. When I was exploring this trait, I couldn’t stop laughing in many places. Because Sasuke is such a trolling machine who mercilessly trolls people who are in his way. He also inspire certain amount of fear which makes him even more unapproachable.

He has this cold bearing where people find it extremely difficult to manage or approach him. It comes off as very rude most of the times. One such example is Sai told Sasuke that he will get along better with him than Naruto. Sasuke put a Genjutsu on him for comparing himself with Naruto. LOL.

What's more funny is most people (Sakura, Orochimaru, Kabuto, Sai, Hinata) usually talk to him politely with honorifics like 'Sasuke-kun'. But he didn't give two shits about them and shitted them all mercilessly.

Here is the infamous proposal from Sakura in part 1.

Well she deserved this one to be honest. Throughout the entire conversation Sasuke never saw her face and responded very bluntly even though she was pouring her heart out crying. There was no visible distress or sadness from Sasuke’s side.

Whereas with Naruto, in the final Valley of The End, we saw him turning towards Naruto and answer him properly when Naruto asked the same question of what Sakura asked. There were so many emotions throughout the battle and Sasuke’s pain of leaving Naruto was clearly shown. Which explains the difference of where Sasuke keeps Naruto in his heart.

The following is the one from Chunin Exams prelims where Sakura is begging for him to quit with tears. The response is an usual 'Stay out of my business'.

Me: Sasuke!!!! Even I don't know how to approach you!!!! I understand you don't like to talk unnecessarily so you just shitted on Sai. But Sakura is your teammate, isn't it?

And then there is this little orange blonde who literally trolls Sasuke.

I really thot Sasuke was going to trash Naruto too, like he could have easily said, 'Naruto, you should also stay out of my business'.

But then

These words are something precious for Naruto. He wished for these words to come from Sasuke someday in his lifetime. But not at that time. And he was truly shocked and very excited. Believe me, when watching that scene, it was really great. But while making analysis like this, it’s absolutely hilarious.

This dynamics is similar to

Sakura: *cries unbearably* Sasuke-kun, I am worried about you. Don’t act so strong.

Sasuke: Shut up. Mind your own business.

Naruto: Bastard! She is worried about you.

Sasuke: Alright, I love you. Now shut up.

ROOOFFFFL :-D

I thought all these childhood bickers were over by part 1 and we will never see it in part 2.

Nope. I was wrong. Kakashi and Sakura were the scapegoats here.

Here's another round of applause from Naruto.

And I honestly cannot comprehend what was going on in Sasuke's mind and why he is really rude to Sakura and Kakashi. It seems he was really irritated by their presence or he maybe thinking they were useless or both.

When Naruto asks him something, he responds without any insults. What baffles me most is that during Infinite Tsukuyomi, Sasuke wanted to kill Naruto for his Revolution and awaiting his fated battle. And yet he answers him properly.

Can you see the pattern here?

He shits on people asking some question even with an utmost polite attitude but when Naruto asks the same question he was like "Alright Sweetie, Am gonna answer anything you want and say anything you like".

The following is the beginning of everything where Naruto can't even swear properly but still Sasuke couldn't even bother.

In short, the way he treats Naruto is quite different and hilarious when compared to the others. With his cold bearing, he absolutely has no need to put up with Naruto's outburst but he still accepts without a care every time. RIP to those souls who got the short end of the stick.

He must have an extreme tolerance towards Naruto's tirades to the point where he can never insult him back. And I also believe 100% that, nobody dares to make such frequent insults on Sasuke to his face except Naruto.

I know SK shippers jump in here to say Naruto is not the only one. But still the dynamics between Karin and Sasuke is simply a mirror image of Naruto and Sasuke, probably she reminded him of Naruto and hence made some exceptions for her because Sasuke never gives a damn about any other clan other than his own, but when Kabuto tells him Karin belongs to Uzumaki clan, he was shocked. I am pretty sure the only other Uzumaki member he knew is none other than Naruto.

Now, does this means he is in super love with Naruto? No.

But the way he treats every other characters and how he treats Naruto exclusively speaks volumes and this trope shouldn’t have existed in the first place. The creator should have made Sasuke treat both of his teammates equally which could’ve deflected the shipping angle.

Attentive

Am not talking about how attentively he analyzes his enemies in the battles. Of course, in that department, Sasuke flies high. This is about how attentive he is to Naruto to the point where he can deduce what Naruto thinks and how Naruto looks without the need to communicate with him.

I know Sasuke suspected Sakura was acting strange before Chunin Exams when she said 'Good Morning' with some hesitation. But the difference here is that Sasuke can identify Naruto without even talking to him.

Funny thing here is that Sasuke was sitting somewhere far behind from Naruto and yet he could pick up Naruto getting freaked out without seeing his face.

Who could forget about the famous ‘Where’s real Naruto?’ episode during Chunin Exams?. It would’ve been fine if this happened once. But the creator went ahead and made this thing happen twice under entirely different situations. And everytime Sasuke can find fake Naruto without fail. This scene conveys Sasuke is very observant towards Naruto’s appearance & fighting skills (the way he evades an attack).

Now, being attentive to someone is not a special thing which attributes to love. But considering Sasuke’s personality who is aloof and focused on his own world, knowing Naruto like the back of his hand is way too descriptive. Only someone who really understands the other person or constantly paying attention can find out such subtle changes. It doesn’t end here.

This is the battle between Gaara and Naruto. Where Naruto was literally confused about how to save his friends from Gaara who is much more powerful. And yet Sasuke can find Naruto’s mood just by seeing him.

Me: Yes, Sasuke!!! Gaara happened to pass by Naruto and forgot to kill him on a whim!!! So, Naruto is scared to the shit!!

Also Me: You guys always bicker with each other and are not best of friends. Sasuke!!! How could you analyze his mood just by looking at Naruto????

In Shippuden, There’s no inner monologue like the above, but whenever Naruto appears before him (Orochimaru’s hideout, Bridge, War arc), Sasuke gives his undivided attention to him. He even went so far as to advice him to pay attention to the battle. And I was like “Wait!!! you wanted to kill him... why pay attention to him at all? Geez”.

As much as you want to think that Sasuke doesn’t care about anyone, he does care about Naruto to the point where he doesn’t want him to be worried. How thoughtful just for a ‘teammate’.

How did Sasuke knew that Naruto would worry about him?, I wonder.

But all these things started from this

This boy has been noticing Naruto from way back when he was around 7 when he lost his family. Of course he would know every little things about Naruto because for some undefinable reason he couldn’t stop paying his attention to Naruto. A lineup of girls vying for his attention because of his cool appearance, whereas Sasuke simply loved Naruto without any reservations but because of his childish and warm personality which reminded him of his family.

‘I couldn’t stop paying attention to you’ and in some translations the words were ‘I couldn’t take my eyes off you’. Either way, these words are not for someone you see just as a friend let alone a brother.

Protectiveness

I can go on and on about how protective Sasuke is towards Naruto. I can write a separate post about it. This is the most important aspects of this ship which makes it sail higher than any other ships.

Of course, this is the Ninja world where people wants to protect each other and at the same time kill each other too. Sasuke protecting Naruto and Naruto protecting Sasuke is not too special. In fact, one of the weak and pathetic character like Sakura was saved once in every three episodes by Naruto or Kakashi or even by Sasuke sometimes.

And yet here I am mentioning protectiveness as the most important aspect of this ship. So what differentiates?

The way Sasuke protects Naruto is one of the intense thing I’ve ever seen. When I watch this series, I gained this immense ability to put myself in other characters mind just like Naruto. When I put myself in Sasuke’s mind whenever he tried to protect Naruto under different conditions, I simply cannot put their relationship under Friendship.

Here, Naruto is fighting Gaara in part 1 and Naruto was repelled by his own attack from the paper bomb. Sasuke being already battered by his curse mark bruise and he couldn’t move an inch. And yet he is shielding Naruto even though it is completely unnecessary because Naruto bumping into a tree log is completely normal. The creator even went under a lot of pain to draw that panel which took 40% of the page.

Now you may question, many characters even died protecting someone. What’s so special with just shielding?

Like Hinata jumping in for suicide before Pain, Iruka blocking Mizuki’s attack, Tsunade blocking Orochimaru, Neji dying as a ‘Love Cupid’ for hinata and Naruto.... I can cite many things here. What’s common among them all is that they were all perfectly capable of moving around and yet decided to save Naruto.

But that’s not the only point.

Is there any need for him to save Naruto? No.

Will Naruto die if he didn’t shield him? No.

Then why? He could have spent that energy trying to do something for Sakura rather than do a pointless shielding.

And then there is Kushina.

Naruto’s mom was already on the verge of dying as she had Kurama extracted from her body and Jinchuriki without a Tailed Beast will die. Because of Uzumaki clan’s strong life force, she could hold off for a bit longer. When kurama attacked Naruto, she shielded him with her body and saved her son from an imminent death.

Even though Sasuke didn’t die shielding him, but there is a semblance.

Both protected Naruto even when their body condition is worse. That is, Protect at all cost attitude.

I intended to put Land of the Waves arc here as it is very similar to what happens with Kushina. But that’s for an upcoming section.

Now, as a Mother her instinct to protect Naruto is very strong.

But who is Naruto for Sasuke? What makes his instinct so strong to protect someone who is not even related by his blood? Until and unless you love that person dearly you won’t do it.

That brings me to the next thing.

Yeah, it kind of looks ‘very friendly’ to give a 3 layered protection to someone who is already powered up like you and most importantly you want to kill him.(Can I say that looks really romantic?). Anyways my point is different.

What really happens here is this

It is a well established fact that Minato, the Yellow Flash is the fastest shinobi in Narutoverse. It wasn’t surpassed yet. He uses the Hiraishin No Jutsu to teleport at the speed of light. It was invented by none other than Tobirama Senju who is the fastest shinobi of his time.

We basically have two fastest shinobi in the battlefield here. And Minato being the fastest among them, definitely don’t want to blow up near his son for whom he died protecting him once. He wanted to teleport somewhere away and before he could do it, Tobirama teleported the bomb back to Obito.

What many fails to notice here is that all these things are happening in mere seconds. But Sasuke realized it real quick as usual and protects Naruto in an instant. How fast his instinct you may ask? Quicker than the two fastest shinobi on the battlefield and one among them is Naruto’s dad.

What I want to say is Sasuke’s protective instinct is quicker than Naruto’s father and similar to Naruto’s mother.

And you know, I questioned myself during the Chunin Exams arc “I think in the Zabuza arc, Naruto conveniently happened to be near Sasuke, So he protected him at the cost of his life. What if Sakura happens to be there? Would he have done the same? Maybe he would’ve died protecting her too.”

But all of my questions were thrown into drain by Sasuke as if he was able to read my mind. The answer is “Hell! I don’t care if she died. That’s her loss. I will not die for her sake.”

This is really confusing, hilarious and romantic at the same time.

Me: Sasuke!!! I understand why you want to save Jugo... Even though you abandoned him in the Land of Iron. LOL. What are you going to do with Naruto anyway when the whole world is blasted off?

He proved this again in the Kaguya’s Lava dimension too. Before you tell me that he saved Naruto because he needs him to seal off Kaguya, the previous scenario nullifies your argument.

And SS wankers shamelessly defending that Sasuke don’t want Sakura to die by Kaguya’s hands, that’s why he left her to die. Geez!!! Who the hell is Sakura to Kaguya anyway? Even if she were to die by Kaguya’s hands, it would almost look like how Obito died. It’s not bad at all. But falling into the lava pit, burning, screaming.... sssshhhh. Wake the f**k up!!!

Now how can you convince me that this is just Friendship? What’s more funny is Sasuke wanted to kill Naruto later at some point. Throughout the War Arc I was always confused as to why Sasuke even care about Naruto at all? He didn’t care about him ever since he left him 3 or 4 years ago and he doesn’t have to. After all everyone have their own paths to walk on.

Even if I put myself in Sasuke’s mind and see Naruto just as a friend whom I want to kill, I wouldn’t go under so much pain to save him. I would feel like it’s better for him to die by something else rather than me. Because I can’t bring myself to kill someone I know well.

These scenes are not just put there by chance.

Such a strong reflex to protect someone is only possible when you consider that person’s life more than yours.

Does any other ship has such things to show? I’ll wait.

Yeah Sasuke protected Sakura from Orochimaru and Gaara. But he also went so far to wait for Karin and awakened a new power to protect her. So does this means he love those girls?? No. He was just showing a team camaraderie. But it’s funny that later, he tried to kill those girls knowing full well they are unprepared to fight him. While with Naruto, it always comes with a warning. Try to understand this difference. Which is exactly why I didn’t put Sasuke saving Naruto during his Chakra training, or falling from the waterfall and many more. Because they are just a team camaraderie.

I don’t even have to compare with other ships, did Sasuke ever protected anyone like this in the whole series?. These are the things which could’ve been avoided or handled in a different way, like there was no need to emphasize on saving Naruto alone while ignoring others.

My body moved on its own

I don’t need to explain this any deeper. There are many people who says Sasuke is incapable of showing his true feelings. He is cold, rude, aloof and stoic so he always hides his feelings for everyone (mostly this line was used by Sakura wankers who wanted to portray that Sasuke always loved Sakura deeply but never shows). But they fail to understand the irony that one of the most beautiful line in this entire series was told by none other than ‘Sasuke Uchiha’, “My body moved on its own”.

Yet I find Sasuke shows his honest and heartful emotions before the people he loves. If he can show that to Itachi and Naruto, why not with Sakura?

I know those wankers try to say Sasuke repressed all his feelings until Chapter 698, so he has some romantic feelings for Sakura too. Bullshit!!!

Even though he repressed those feelings in his mind, his body always betrays him in the end and his feelings pours out from time to time. That is what this section explores about.

Man, this is the most painful GIF I have ever made.

In his battle with Itachi, he was completely consumed by the feeling of revenge and hatred for his brother. But when Itachi approached him in his final moments with an intention (seemingly) to snatch his eyes, he still couldn't push Itachi away though he could have. Sasuke just looked into his eyes and let him do whatever he was about to do.

Why?, Because he loved his brother so much once that he don't know what to do but simply embrace that moment. These are the moments your mind says to close your eyes or even run away (he totally could have) but his body will not allow him to.

This is what I meant by your body betrays yourself. Even in your darkest moments, you cannot fake. You always show your true emotions towards the person you love. The more you suppress, the more it will burst out.

Here Sasuke’s hatred is glaring through his eyes because Sakura is persuading him to not do something he wants to (as always). His only motivation is to kill that man. His resolve is a real deal.

But in a matter of minutes after giving that long hateful speech with some heavy determination, when he saw that hungry blonde boy who was tied up for trying to steal food, Sasuke just acted on his own and served him food even though he was told not to which could jeopardize his career.

This bipolar dance is something to notice throughout the series and is always interesting to explore. When Sakura tries to dissuade Sasuke from something, he always retorts to insults or an angry stare. But when Naruto accidentally stands in Sasuke’s way, he always involuntarily helps him out.

In short, towards Sakura he was like “Even you cannot take that path away from me” but when turning towards Naruto, he was like “Well, I can risk everything for you at the cost of my path”.

This seals the real deal for SNS ship.

At this point, for us viewers, Naruto is just an orphan who has no friends but always carries his life with a positive spirit hoping that someday he will be accepted by everyone.

Unbeknownst the fact that he already has one person who was willing to die for him and putting all his dreams into fire.

Important thing to notice, It’s entirely at Naruto’s fault for them being in this situation. If Naruto had used a bit of brain to attack from outside the mirror, they wouldn’t have been in this situation. But still Sasuke plunged into the trap without any regrets. That’s the beauty of this scene.

What’s more thrilling is that the creator told us Sasuke loved Naruto in the very next chapter itself.

How?

By making Haku jump before Zabuza knowing full well that he is going to die which is not very different from how Sasuke shielded Naruto.

And not only that, but by making Naruto say “He really loved you”. I got to say the creator may sucks at writing Sakura and Hinata for God only knows for whatever twisted reasons. But when it comes to male characters like Naruto, Sasuke, Itachi, Obito... he was just amazing and on another level.

How?

By indirectly drawing parallels between Sasuke and Haku in a matter of successive chapters.

By dropping indirect hints and crumbs like these to tell us, the audience, the motivations of the characters.

I always had the thought why did he risked his life for a boy who always fights with him? This became more emotional when we get to know the real reason for why Sasuke risked his life much later in chapter 698.

Having faced all the turbulent things in his life, somehow seeing Naruto doing all those childish stuffs made him feel relieved. That warmth was what he needed at that time. He wanted to escape from it but couldn’t. That’s why he embraced his warmth unknowingly in his Team 7 days by constantly reaching out to him starting from asking tips, concerned about having breakfast and training with him to climb the tree.

Sasuke even come to like Naruto more than himself and that’s why he was willing to die for him.

This feeling is definitely not a bromance or friendship. It’s an innocent enchantment you hope to last forever. Which again explains why he tolerated Naruto’s insults and hostility all those times. Because Sasuke knew those childish things were the ones he got attracted to him ever since his childhood. Rather than saying tolerated, I should use the term enjoyed. He really enjoyed those moments being bugged by Naruto for no reason.

Because just like Itachi said to Sasuke once, ‘If you are excellent you become alienated and arrogant even though you were sought after at the beginning’ . But Naruto pestering him means he is very curious about Sasuke which no one else tried. He was adored by those girls for his coolness and revered by those boys for his excellence but nobody really tried to befriend him. But Naruto tried to befriend him through Rivalry. That’s why Sasuke unconsciously started to like him. This also explains why he roasted Sakura for badmouthing him even though Naruto attacked him and tied him up earlier.

If Sasuke can show all these feelings even though he was trying to suppress it towards Naruto and Itachi, Why can’t he show a single normal feeling towards Sakura??? Because there isn’t one. Except for an old Team 7 camaraderie where he saw her as an acquaintance and nothing more.

Many NH shippers claims, but Hinata loved her ‘Naruto-Kun’. She jumped in front of Naruto to save him from Pain, when in reality she just acted selfishly and couldn’t pull out the Chakra rods. Meaning she failed whatever she was about to do.

Another interesting thing to cite for NH shippers, they claim for Naruto, Hinata is the most important person his life. Since when? With that shitty movie called ‘The Last’ with shitty retconned stuff? In all the 699 chapters he always claimed Iruka Sensei and Sasuke were the important people in his life. And you know what? For Hinata to like Naruto, he has to jump in to save her from the bullies. But for Sasuke he just saved Naruto without any validation. He saw Naruto and liked his presence and just did it.

When you could accept that failed attempt as a love, why not accept Sasuke loves Naruto when in fact he succeeded in saving him and that too unconditionally?

This is one of the tropes which should have been avoided if the creator wanted Sasuke and Naruto to be just friends.

One and Only

This is something very special that is offered to that one person in his life. That is Naruto. Even Itachi knew it. That is the Power to influence Sasuke’s heart. This is the fact even Sasuke himself knew it and that’s why he wanted to kill him.

Now don’t compare this with the manipulation shit which Orochimaru and Obito were doing. It’s not that. Many Sasuke fanatics always blame Naruto that he is also manipulating Sasuke just like everyone. That’s totally wrong.

Manipulation is something you do by talking about some twisted facts and make the other person to do what you want to.

Naruto never did that. Ever. Whenever Naruto and Sasuke meet, they always talk about themselves and how they feel. Not the world, not Team 7 or anything. Which is exactly why Sasuke himself willingly left that space in his heart for Naruto when he left him in the Valley of the End which he badly wanted to destroy. Sasuke, of all people, know Naruto is also very honest.

Sasuke lost all his rationality when he went into darkness by stabbing Karin who was helping him in his battle with Danzo. She even replenished his chakra many times. He not only just stabbed her, after when he found her still alive, he decided to finish her off with his Chidori.

And then the pink haired bitch appears before him and started to concoct lies with malicious intent to kill him. This provoked Sasuke more and more to reach this point.

Believe me, when you are lost in darkness, all you need is a small light which can show you a path. Someone who can extend helping hands to lift you up with honesty.

Sakura, being a crass woman, riled up Sasuke further with full of nonsense.

If you want to picture the darkness,

This is exactly how Sasuke feels. He is in so much pain and don’t know how to face it or deal with it. So he started to destroy everything he sees. For him Karin, Sakura, Kakashi are all just some pebbles in his way and want to trample them as he goes. His entire life has become farce after knowing his beloved brother’s real pain and miseries. Now he has no one left from his family.

Until Naruto appears.

He may not be his family, but he is the only person left for him in this world. Which is established in many Naruto endings and even Sasuke himself accepts this with Sage of Six Paths.

But my Cherry Blossom queen really loved Sasuke, she only wanted the good of him. My question is ‘Then why the fuck she tried to kill him? She looked at Sasuke and find that he changed. She didn’t even bothered to find out what’s going on from his side.’ Then how is this considered as wanting only good for him?

Surprisingly Sasuke calmed down a bit, the moment Naruto appears and even started to respond to him which he didn’t before with Kakashi and Sakura. Deep down Sasuke himself knew in his heart that the path he is going through is Self-destructive. Just like Kurama tells Naruto ‘Destroy everything you see’ in the Pain arc when he sprouted upto Eighth Tail, Sasuke’s traumatic mind tells him to ‘Destroy Konoha’.

All he needed was someone to extend an helping hand to tell him what to do without any malice. Naruto did that. Just like what Minato did for Naruto in Pain arc.

After clashing Rasengan with Chidori ,they meet inside the White bubble space and Naruto talks to Sasuke which evoked all his past memories which he never wanted to awaken.

That’s why Sasuke was visibly shaken with Naruto’s words. Because those were the words which mirrors exactly how Sasuke feels too. He was surprised and shocked that Naruto also felt the same way without him ever openly confessing those feelings.

When everyone tried to kill him for his monstrosity, Naruto is the only person standing there seeing him as his friend. Just like how Iruka saw Naruto way back in 1st chapter.

Believe me, even at the depth of darkness, when you see the person you love so much, you will stop and rationalize.

That is exactly why Itachi left Sasuke in Naruto’s hands. He even admitted to Sasuke that his words will not reach him no matter what.

Sasuke may not have abandoned his ambitions at that point. But Naruto gave him a clear path. That is ‘Show all your hatred on me’ and then do whatever you want.

I know SS shippers will claim that back hug from Sakura changed his murderous behaviour during the Chunin Exams. Yes. That’s true. But right after that, when Sasuke was fighting Yoroi in a one-on-one combat, his Cursed Seal flares up again. He retracted that seal out of his sheer will and thought about both Sakura and Naruto who was freaking out without even knowing about the seal. So, it’s not only a Sakura exclusive moment. The creator even went ahead and drawn a panel asking Sakura to not say anything about the Curse Mark to Naruto. Why do that?

As far as I understand, Sasuke saw Naruto and felt the warmth of his family. He singled that out in chapter 698. When Naruto was placed in the same team as him, he started to extend his good side to his other team members as well. But the moment he decided to leave the village, he severed the ties with Sakura (was there ever one apart from considering her as a teammate?) by saying Thank You. Meaning, you helped me many times so thanks for all of that. What’s more pitiful is, he didn’t even look at her face for the entire conversation except for saying ‘You are really annoying’. There is nowhere in the manga where Sasuke singled out Sakura for making him feel anything and did something for her exclusively. It’s all in the context of Team 7.

If Sakura is the most important person in Sasuke’s life, he should have stopped the rampage the moment he saw her but instead he got riled up more and more. Which explains where Sasuke kept her in his heart. Literally nowhere. He threw her into the trash. LOL.

If Hulk can calm down after seeing Betty Ross and you call that love, why not accept Sasuke loves Naruto??

Powerful Eyes

You know, Even in real life, Our eyes always reflects our true feelings, just like how your body betrays your mind , your eyes even betray your body.

Just like how Itachi could never fake his evil brother act in his final moments.

Just like how Sasuke couldn’t turn away from Itachi when he was approaching him to seemingly snatch his eyes.

Uchiha boys being a romantic bunch, always expose their awakening/ reawakening/ evolving their Sharingan in a most distressed situation. Just like Madara and Sasuke exposed their brimming eyes for Hashirama and Naruto. But in this department, Madara is wildly romantic as always. LOL. Despite losing 3 brothers, he awakened his Sharingan only when he was breaking up with his ‘friend’. And Sasuke, he reawakened / evolved Sharingan when trying to save / breaking up with his ‘friend’. Such a Biological defect!!!!

Poor Sakura pathetically fails in this department.

Anyways this part is not about Sharingan anyway. It’s about how such a powerful eyes becomes powerless before those Blue Eyes.

Eye Symbolism is something I really enjoy exploring in this ship.

Like I mentioned earlier, Sasuke has never shown his emotions atleast starting from Part II. He usually never shows any positive emotions like happiness, laughing, pouting, love, excitement (although he has shown all these towards Itachi and Naruto) and is known for negative emotions like anger, annoyance, hatred.

Look at how Sasuke is glaring with hatred for her insensitive words. She deserved this to be honest.

Now, is there any need to show your fury towards Kabuto?

Since the beginning of the Shippuden, some facts have been established strongly:

1. Sasuke has changed by leaps and bounds in terms of his attitude and hatred.

2. Sharingan is pretty dangerous. Many characters including kurama acknowledges it. Sasuke is very adept at using his Sharingan.

Orochimaru maybe right. But he doesn’t know the weakness. LOL

His hatred has reached to a point where he couldn’t think anything rationally and started to kill everyone, just like how Naruto kicked Sakura in his 4 Tailed Kyuubi Mode engulfed with the hatred of Kurama. Meaning, to reach his goal, Sasuke will kill anyone in his path without any hesitation. This shot is the representation of this.

And yet when he saw those particular Blue eyes, he stops his rampage immediately and visibly shocked even. That’s the look of ‘why is that blue eyes here?’

You have every right to accuse me that I am over exaggerating this scene. I am not. Even I wanted to think that way too that I am deluding myself. The creator has only consolidated my view pretty strongly.

There’s no need to emphasize on eyes at all. The anime team has went under so much pain to animate this scene in a satisfying and compelling way.

What’s more? The creator even went under further extent to draw a whole page in the manga focusing on their eye contact after the Rasengan vs Chidori clash. Meaning, Sasuke has calmed down visibly and became very easy to reason with.

Trust me, even in your darker / vulnerable moments, your eyes will reflect your true feelings to the person you love. You cannot be stubborn.

Now did it stop here?? Nope, it happened again in the Final Valley of the End battle too.

Sasuke is usually confident of his Sharingan (rightfully so) and likes to flaunt his eyes just like Madara. He was very sure that he was going to win.

While Sasuke had a clear resolve to kill Naruto when he was showing his back, but the moment he comes close with those Blue Eyes, his heart even pounded strongly (in the anime), and lost the resolve completely which made his Sharingan retract itself unconsciously. Meaning, his eyes betrayed him.

It’s funny that not even a minute ago he was very proud of his Visual Prowess as an Uchiha and his victory is inevitable but the moment he saw those Blue eyes, he just lost. You think I am again exaggerating?. Nope!!!

Oh Dear!!! This doesn’t get more romantic than this. An inescapable gaze from those blue eyes he loved all along.

Sasuke!! What happened to your proud Uchiha eyes?. You just stole Chakra from Naruto, isn’t it? Hints like these are really heartwarming, to be honest.

My entire point is, every character from every arc hypes up Sharingan starting from Zabuza, Haku, Rock Lee, Orochimaru, Kabuto, Kurama and many more, but why put a weakness for Naruto’s eyes?

What I really loved exploring is the way Sasuke totally expressed everything through his eyes in Episode 478.

Sasuke shows his vulnerability towards Naruto with just his eyes. These are not something you show to everyone. Even when Itachi departed finally after releasing Edo Tensei, Sasuke looked sad, shocked and pained but didn’t cry. He accepted the reality of it. The last time when we saw him crying, it was after knowing the truth of Itachi, facing towards the beach and was weeping unbearably because there was no one else for him in this world. But this time, he is next to the person whom he feels truly loved and he doesn’t mind showing it with his eyes.

Well, on multiple rewatches, the clues for their love was already dropped in the 1st Valley of the End fight itself. Sasuke already lost his resolve to kill by balling his chidori fist rather than ramming through his chest. So the feelings inside the bubble are their honest emotions like always.

The pain on the verge of their separation inside the white bubble is clearly evident from their eyes even in their monstrous form. Even in the manga it was mentioned that ‘I can’t turn my back Vs I am not letting you go’

But what they really wanted to be from their childhood was this.

Look at Sasuke, how entranced he was on looking at that innocent boy. Now put yourself at Sasuke’s mind. Will you ever look at your friend like that??? Now, they are probably just 7 here, am not romanticizing. But Sasuke looks enthralled innocently.

But somehow, their paths separated them for who knows how long. But the pain in both their eyes is unbearable. Even the databook, mentioned that separating from Naruto is like ripping half of his body. Well, this proves it.

Now, if they really wanted to portray this as friendship, they never should have given Eye symbolism at all. They should have gone with ‘I was always jealous of you’ thing, like they portrayed in that filler episode 450.I would’ve gladly accepted it as friendship. Because that’s how friends behave when they are jealous and I wasn’t feeling any romance at all. There’s no need of that lengthy monologue on how he was always looking at Naruto and felt pain.

I am telling you, I won’t be looking at my friend like this.

Unconscious closeness

Remember, I’ve written in the beginning of the post that Sasuke enjoys the warmth from Naruto. Meaning, he likes that person’s presence unconsciously and want to be near him. Sasuke proved this many times.

This is the most intense and confusing section I have to dissect for this post. But it’s the most entertaining nonetheless, atleast for me.

Starting from the Land of the Waves arc, here Sasuke is speed walking to match up with Naruto.

Initially I thought, he is trying to be competitive. But instead of walking ahead of Naruto to show who is faster, he just walks beside him. I find this really hilarious and adorable. This just shows Sasuke likes Naruto’s presence so much so that he wants to walk beside him.

Now many SS shippers tries to make this scene for themselves, when it is clearly not.

If you notice Sasuke in the Bell Training, he compares his strength difference with Kakashi and determines to get stronger. Same with Might Guy, he compares Might Guy’s speed with his own Sensei. Meaning, he respects people with strength. Naturally, he should’ve asked her and Sakura would have given him tips wholeheartedly. Because she really succeeded in that training.

Why bother to ask a deadlast?

The only reason I could find is that he wants to befriend him in his own stubborn way. But Poor Soul!!! He didn’t get the tips anyway. LOL. But despite getting the short end of the stick, he never hold it against him. Just like he never held anything against Naruto when he tied him up in Episode 3. All he did was just flaunt how he escaped.

Pretty cool for a 12 year old kid. Because If I were Sasuke, I would hold it for sure.

Once again Sasuke proves how he can care Naruto in his own adorable way.

He could’ve said ‘I am going to train too” if he really intended to train. There is no need to say ‘Going for a Walk’ and ask Naruto about breakfast. This explains that Sasuke simply missed the boy’s prolonged absence and reached out to him in his own cute way.

Now all these doesn’t mean he was in love with him. It’s just a childish attraction which makes him act like that involuntarily.

I just added this GIF to compare with the next scene.

Now Shikamaru falling on Naruto in an unconventional way doesn’t look anywhere romantic. Instead it’s the opposite. They are pretty friendly here.

But Sasuke’s approach to Naruto does looks undeniably sensual and I couldn’t deny the sexual tension that brings with it. (Even when I watched it for the first time having no idea of shipping anyone, I lowkey got creeped and thought, ‘Sasuke!! What have you become? ’)

This scene is something even I can’t dissect. Because honestly I don’t know. Sasuke is a person who never appreciates physical touches nor does he initiates either.

I get this crazy femme fatale vibe when seeing Sasuke with his sexy costume landing at a speed of lightning with his hands wrapped around Naruto and taunting near his ear about what was he doing there? The only reason I could think of is that maybe he missed him for 3 years which made him go unconsciously so close near Naruto. It’s also funny that he could’ve shoved his sword into Naruto’s heart before landing and no one could’ve batted an eyelid.

Damn you, Kishimoto!!! Is this scene absolutely necessary??? What are you trying to convey? Why do you give Sasuke, a sexualized aura?? I understand you love this character so much and you want this character to be desirable among women. Yeah, you succeeded by making Karin behave like a woman in heat, the moment they met. But instead of letting her get close to him, you made Sasuke to say ‘You... Don’t get so close’ whereas with Naruto, you made Sasuke to go willingly touch him in a half hugging stance. Geez!!!

Here comes the most interesting part in this section.

It may seem irrelevant at the beginning but trust me, it will make sense later.

Before that, I would like to appreciate the creator and especially the anime team to bring the battle sequence so lively and different in its own way. If you notice the purpose of every battle that happened in Naruto series, each carries it own meaning and deliberately distinguished. How you ask?

The fight between Deidara vs Sasuke.

Logically Deidara should be dead in the Gaara retrieval arc itself. There is no point for him to chase Sasuke who killed Orochimaru to whom Deidara had nothing to do with. It didn’t impact the story in any way. But the purpose of that battle is to show how far Sasuke has grown up in those 3 years. The way he can use his Sharingan to analyze his enemies abilities and weakness so quickly and take multiple steps ahead, the way he can use Genjutsu and other incredible jutsus in his arsenal were a visual treat.

Now, let’s analyze Sasuke’s arsenal of Jutsus. He can do Teleportation Jutsu, a decent Genjutsu, Chidori Senbon (needles), Raikiri (Chidori sword which ranges to 5 metres), Chidori Nagash (Chidori from his whole body), Transformation Jutsu, Substitution Jutsu Shuriken Jutsu with wire works, Kirin, Gokakyu No jutsu, Sword fighting, basic Hand-to-Hand fighting (I’ve never seen him do it ever since the Chunin Exams with Orochimaru), Archery fighting, Susanoo, Amaterasu and all the Rinnegan abilities.

Based on the jutsus he learned so far and how he applies in every battle, it all confirms two things:

Sasuke is a Medium-Long Range Shinobi

Sasuke’s battles are usually based on his Cleverness

Let’s go for Naruto. He can do Teleportation Jutsu, Sexy Jutsu, Harem no jutsu, Rasengan, Rasen Shuriken, Oodama Rasengan, Biju Dama, Tailed Beast Mode, Kage Bunshin No jutsu, Sage mode jutsu, Frog Kumite, Better Hand-to-Hand combat skills (better than Sasuke), Transformation Jutsu, Substitution Jutsu and all his Six path abilities.

Compared to Sasuke, Naruto’s jutsu variety is very less. But for every 4 punches from Sasuke equals 1 powerful punch from Naruto. Analyzing all of them,

Naruto is a Close-Range Shinobi except for his Rasen Shuriken

Naruto’s battles are usually based on his Jutsu Timing and Unpredictability

Now, Let’s rewind back to 3 years and look at the 1st Valley of the End battle. That battle was cleverly choreographed which carried very intense emotional baggage. Things we never knew about those boys until then were openly admitted and acknowledged. That is, for Sasuke, Naruto became his closest friend. For Naruto, he always wanted to be Sasuke’s friend way back when he was 6 or 7. For both, they already have some unexplainable bond by just looking at each other and smiling secretly.

The theme of that battle started as Am going on my own path vs I can’t allow you to tread on that dangerous path and ended up with I want to break our bond vs I don’t want to.

Now, this posture represents, Naruto is the one who pursues Sasuke to stop him from whatever he was about to do. Meaning, Naruto is the one who is constantly reaching out and Sasuke as usual kicks him out violently, that is he is pushing him away. That’s the essence of the whole battle.

Considering all the battles in the Naruto universe, I categorize them as follows:

Best Calculated (and emotional) battle - Itachi vs Sasuke

Best Hand-to-Hand combat - Kakashi vs Obito (what a fight it was!!!)

Best Mega Powered Up battle - Hashirama vs Madara

Best Emotional battle - Naruto vs Sasuke (1st valley of the end)

Best Unpredictable/Entertaining battle - Naruto vs Pain

Despite having all the potential to fulfill the above categories, The Final Valley of the End Battle never bested in any of them.

As analyzed before, the boys have grown up to greater heights. I expected a battle between Cleverness of Sasuke Vs Unpredictability of Naruto

But what I observed was something so intense. That is Unintentional closeness.

This battle symbolizes one thing: I am going to kill you to get lonely vs I won’t let you kill me because you will be alone.

Being a long range fighter, I expected Sasuke to go for this.

If you have to kill someone you love, it is best to keep your distance. Sasuke knows this full well when he battled with Itachi. Except for some Sword fighting, he maintained a certain distance to fight Itachi throughout, until the very end.

But when fighting Naruto, all I got was this.

That’s when I finally understood that this posture means, the fight is very personal. Which means, Sasuke or Naruto won’t be fighting by sitting on top of each other with their enemies or anyone else. That’s just between them alone.

There was no analysis or cleverness from Sasuke’s side or any Unpredictability from Naruto. It was very bland and Sasuke looked clueless throughout the fight.

It started with some boxing style combat, including stealing hand seals and then some power punches. Very quickly it propels to Susanoo vs Tailed Beast mode. I expected some Hashirama vs Madara level power battle.

But all we saw there was this.

I mean, Come on!!! Man. Even the most Crazy and openly Romantic Uchiha, Madara himself never fought like this in Susanoo with Hashirama (Though Madara must be thinking ‘Damn Hashirama! I should’ve tried this with you’. LOL). Those mega battles carried variety of tactics.

Another thing I noticed was, Sasuke is the one who does lots of talking and constantly pursuing Naruto. Whereas Naruto is uncharacteristically quiet for the most part.

And finally it leads to this.

Sasuke was unconsciously getting closer and closer to Naruto which is the opposite of what he wants to do. Because of that very closeness, he couldn’t look at his eyes with his Sharingan and eventually got an uppercut. It’s like Sasuke was screaming, ‘Hate me’ and Naruto was like ‘Keep talking’.

Every jutsu he had for attacking from a long-range were forgotten. He didn’t even try to put Naruto under Genjutsu. I mean with his Rinnegan, he was capable of putting all the 9 Tailed Beasts into a powerful Genjutsu. Why didn’t he try that with Naruto? There was no Chidori Stream or Lightning Blade.

I can imagine Naruto doing close range fights with someone or even sitting on top of the enemy. Example, part I, Naruto head bumped Gaara. He was literally fighting with his Shadow Clones against a Monster so he had to get closer. Naruto monstrously punching Deidara not knowing the fact that it was a clay clone.

But Sasuke??? Can you imagine Sasuke sitting on top of the enemy and punching to pulp??? No way. Not a chance.!!!

In one way or other way, Sasuke was always in the close proximity with Naruto throughout the battle and touching each other which is totally uncharacteristic of him when compared to his other battles.

Every battle he ever fought was always at a distance which is the clear representation of his own character. He is calculative, analytical, precise and moves fluidly with a flair like a true Ninja unlike Naruto who is always reckless, noisy, powerful and clumsy.

Sasuke is someone who never lets his emotions get ahead in the battle, unlike Naruto. This is evident from the War when he was yelling at Naruto to stop worrying about Hokage as they were Edo Tensei who can regenerate. Even when fighting with Itachi, he calculated every move and attacked Itachi without any emotions except at the very end. Sasuke in this final battle forgot who he was and telling us viewers “Am just gonna get closer to Naruto and punch him hard”.

In short, Sasuke completely forgot all his battle tactics he had with Itachi and let his emotions get ahead of his cleverness and got himself closer to Naruto which eventually ended up weakening his resolve to kill him. This is what I meant by Unintentional Closeness.

Anyways, what I understood was, the creator didn’t put all this by without any meaning. It’s all very deliberate and drawn carefully.

Moving onto the final and the most defining moments of SNS.

When I watched this scene for the first time, I can’t comprehend the exact meaning. And I forgot about this later because of my excitement to know what happens next. But what I understood on my rewatch is that, the feelings exchanged here is very pure and innocent but distressing.

Sasuke already lost his resolve to kill by not ramming Naruto with Chidori instead balled up his fist. So he is not contemplating whether or not to kill Naruto.

Sasuke made every effort to leave Naruto and succeeded in it too. But somehow, accidentally, when faced with a person whom he considers so precious in such a close proximity, despite have a stinging pain in his arm, he is feeling the warmth he once felt. He just wants that warmth to prolong for some more time and he can’t able to evade it. So he totally gave in to that desire and feeling it unconsciously. Sasuke always watched Naruto (unbeknownst to him) and felt warmth, relief and weakness. This scene is the symbolic and innocent representation of all those feelings when he saw Naruto and he is exeriencing it for the final time.

Does this means, does Sasuke wants to kiss him? No.

But every symbolism of that being happening is there. It’s just all open to interpretations. The creator could show us how Sasuke fell on his knees and staring at Naruto intently but never intended to show when he got up and left. I don’t understand this twisted mind of the creator.

Added to that, Sasuke was about to say ‘Naruto, I....’ God only knows what he was about to say. But every possibility of Sasuke confessing and kissing is there.

I know the creator cannot approach this directly considering the situations he worked under. But is there any necessity for such an intense scene? Even the anime creators loved this scene and made their own version of making Naruto’s eyes wide open and even more closer.

I wont be watching my friend or sister like that.

That explains all the way back to this fated accidental scene.

There is nothing special about this scene. It’s all very clear that the kiss was accidental. It was really funny. But my point is why Sasuke never beat him to pulp or even push Naruto away like he did with Sakura and Karin? Why did he stood up for Naruto before Sakura? Why did he let go off Naruto even though he tied him up? Too many leeway for a single person in a single episode. And the most important part is, Sasuke thought it was intentional and remembers the taste. LOL.

Does this means he enjoyed the kiss? Not at all.

Most probably he was shocked to see Naruto in such a close proximity after seeing him from a distance for all those years. And he enjoys this as just another prank from Naruto in his own innocent way. But he won’t mind getting another one from Naruto either.

So, to conclude

I believe I made this post from an objective standpoint without making crazy theories and I don’t have to..... since canonical resources were plenty. Obviously my own bias will also be there which is unavoidable. But I tried to question the creative choices of why this scene even exist in the first place many times. Because those are the scenes which made the most impact inside me.

My first watch of Naruto gave me the benefit of doubt that ‘Are they in love? Nah... They are friends. Maybe I am just overthinking... but why does it feel different??’ and that too only after finishing episode 478. After rewatching it again and again, it only consolidated my view.

For Sasuke, his worldly ties are pretty thin and runny. He was always a loner from the beginning even when he had his family. He never bothered to make any friends nor did anyone tried to befriend him. He was pretty close to his family especially Itachi. When he lost everything, somehow he got attracted innocently to Naruto and started to like him. But beyond Naruto he never bothered to add anyone in his heart. He considered Kakashi and Sakura were like his acquaintances who helped him a lot and that’s all.

Then after using Orochimaru, he gathered some high skilled shinobi for killing Itachi. But he made it clear that there don’t need to be any understanding but just co-operation would be enough. But along his way, he just abandoned Jugo, Suigetsu somewhere. He openly said to Karin that she is nothing but a burden to him. When his hatred reached upto a maximum boiling point, he didn’t even hesitate to kill Karin, Kakashi or Sakura. But the moment Naruto appears he calmed down. The proof? He was shocked to see Naruto at first. Then Naruto calls, ‘Sasuke!!!’, to which Sasuke responds with, ‘What?’. Despite becoming a maniac, he could find it in his heart to listen to Naruto.

It took an Edo Tenseified Itachi to bring him some rationality to question his beliefs about destroying Konoha. When Jugo and Suigetsu appear again, he casually asked them, ‘What do you want with me at this point?’, I mean, Come On, Man. LOL. Even during the war arc, when things were about to blast off he only cared about Jugo (who helped him many times, so understandable) and Naruto (Geez!!! LOL).

Even after their final battle, the anime went so far as to create a scene where they were alone in a bright Konoha. But Sasuke looked very peaceful and listening to Naruto intently. When Naruto freaks out about Infinite Tsukuyomi, he casually laughs off and says ‘you still care about the world’. Meaning, he is happy there spending time alone with the person he loves. Doesn’t give a rat’s ass about missing anyone else. (How romantic!!!). Honestly, Sasuke wouldn’t mind if they were to stay that way forever. He would gladly listen to Naruto all day. But when Naruto disappears he freaks out and starting to make up his mind about joining his brother.

It’s very clear that the people he adores are Itachi and Naruto. Towards Itachi, it’s super understandable, because he is his own brother. But Naruto??? Why should the creator go so far as to make Sasuke adores Naruto even after breaking up with him?

And why make Sasuke possessive about Naruto’s life? When Obito was about to kill Naruto with that Black Orbs, Sasuke blocked him and said ‘You are not the One to sever the past, I am’. I understand the logic behind Sasuke’s possessiveness on Itachi’s life because he destroyed his family, childhood and even Itachi wants Sasuke to be the one to kill him. But why possessive on Naruto? He is not related to him by blood. Naruto never did anything wrong to Sasuke to warrant any hate either. You will become possessive on something only when you truly hate it or wholeheartedly love it. There is no middle ground. My point is why put Naruto here at all in the first place?? Believe me, If Sasuke never paid attention to Naruto in the War arc, I would be the first person to jump out of this ship.

Just to give you a basic example, Imagine you are living in a place far away from your family, friends and that loveable person. When Corona hits everywhere and forced Lockdown to travel outside the city, and the situation is getting worse day by day. Whom would you desperately reach out first? You would reach the person whom you are connected well in your family and that loved one. You will prioritize your friends only later. This is the Universal truth. Sasuke was seen showing that same instinct in the War arc towards Naruto whom he was not related by blood. And you all just want me to believe Sasuke sees him as just a friend?? Give me a break!!!

If all those traits I’ve mentioned above have been avoided to a greater extent, I would be happy to believe that they are friends. If not all, at the very least delegate some of the tropes to other people or share some of the tropes with other people along with Naruto. But dumping it all on Naruto alone makes me only curious and incredibly romantic too.

It’s no wonder, Naruto would go so far as to reach out Sasuke even at the expense of his life.

Oh, Did I forget about the cutest and most exclusive trope to SNS?

U-SU-RA-TON-KA-CHI, the most personal word which carries its own meaning and is only for Naruto. So funny that Sasuke has to spend a certain amount of energy to call Naruto using a 6 syllabic word rather than NA-RU-TO, a 3 syllabic word which is much easier.

Disclaimer: This post constituted everything from from Chapter 1 to 699 or Episode 1 to 135 (part 1) + Episode 1 to 479 (Shippuden) excluding fillers. Though Sasuke shinden novel was made into anime, I don’t want to consider that here. As much as I loved the prologue in that novel, I still don’t want to cite that here, as I consider everything after 699 is $$$$ making bullshit.

FUN FACT:

If you put yourself in any character in the Naruto Universe except for Naruto, and ask them, ‘What do you think about Sasuke?’. You know the answer from Sakura, she will say ‘Sasuke-Kun looks very cool and acts aloof, that’s why I love him’. Kakashi will say ‘My favorite student’. And all the other people will say somewhat similar, ‘He is an excellent Shinobi who belongs to the proud Uchiha clan and Naruto’s rival’

But Naruto will be the only person to say this.

“Lot of fun to be around” ....... LOLLLLL.

Me: No, Naruto!!! Clearly not. No one in your universe can have fun with him except you. Go and Ask Sai, Team Taka or your own Team 7. They adore him for being Cool and Talented. But Fun is not the word that equates with Sasuke unless there is no You, Naruto.

Thanks for reading :-D

#sasunaru #narusasu #sasunarusasu #sns #naruto #sasuke #naruto uzumaki #sasuke uchiha #anti sakura #itachi #anti sasusaku #anti naruhina #naruto analysis #naruto and sasuke arent brothers as they never shared a womb #if you see your friend with all these traits then you are no longer just friend

578 notes · View notes

aprito · 4 years

Text

hello <3 since i got these asks at the same time i decided to combine my thoughts on them in this post. yet another annoying sjw essay from yours truly on this blog

before i get into these i think i need to preface why im like. i guess overly hyperfocused on a certain unproblematic base (same age au / platonic canon) for them and avoid the ped0philic content like the plague lol

tw for pedophilia ment, rape ment if that makes you squicky. ALSO THIS IS LONG AND RAMBLY

as i’ve mentioned a couple times already, ive been into the ship since i was 12, back when it was very very common to not only post untagged (nsfw) canonverse content of the two in writing and in drawing but also non con and the like, so you can imagine how bad my first impression online was. thinking back on it ...as a child i found it disturbing but didnt really register how problematic it really was?? (i know, but i also lived in the middle of nowhere and had no one explain this to me)

skip to 2014 aka me coming back to naruto at 17ish and i had kinda become hyper aware of the fact that there was an increasing amount of people online who had come forward with explaining how fictional problematic content, mostly pedophilia, had been used to groom them into starting relationships with adullts. it was also a time where a lot of people didnt believe these victims, not registering how common it was for minors to be online friends with adults who had no boundaries and no qualms exposing them such content. not gonna get into my personal life here but i was lucky to not having gone through this myself. like... it kinda was my first time truly realising how fiction can EASILY be used to manipulate others irl (and yes i will not argue this, if you dont think fictional media can form and manipulate people’s opinions on attitudes, countries, cultures and virtues, pick up a book about the effects of propaganda media at least once please)

i, being young, still liking the dynamic but not really the romance, would point this out here and there in the fandom and get into fights with grown adults in their mid 20s who assumed i automatically hated the ship(s) and tried to restrict their freedom of speech or whatever, heard everything from the “age of consent doesnt exist in naruto” to the “sasori looks like a child what does it matter” despite people clearly playing on him being older and experienced. it made me so upset that people were just consuming all this content uncritically and exposing children to it tbh?? not really just sos but a lot of minor/adult ships in naruto in general. and thats where i sat down and thought, i do not want to be a grown adult talking down to children that point out how unsafe the fandom is. theyre absolutely right in drawing these boundaries and calling out adults who defend the uncritical consumption and creation of this content. i do not want to consume or create content that predators could use to groom minors, and i absolutely do want to let younger people in fandom know that i am respecting their comfort zones and want them to have a safe and fun experience. after all, naruto is not an adult show and i think a lot of people forget that!!!! i am not perfect in that regard but its something that i, at the age of 23, am very passionate about and strive towards to.

and i guess thats where same age au was born for me and i have been sticking to it ever since.

so finally we can move to the first question

aside from the fact that we both dont like canon sos, i dont think it would work out even if i wasnt prejudiced to it anyways. in all honesty, 35 year old canon sasori is not a redeemable character to me, given the fact that he’s easily amongst the cruelest villains in naruto (torturing and killing and taxiderming people for his own fun personal gain, never for a goal that served anyone but himself. how do you redeem having over 300 corpses in your backpack that you felt absolutely no remorse for killing). sasori was legit one of the only cruel villains that didnt had someone else pull the strings, which sends a clear message on kishi’s part, who absolutely loves to redeem villains LOL.

being that old, he obviously had already been very manifested in what he believed in, even if it was shakey, to the point where the first crack in that world view (sakura and chiyo protecting each other) immediately had him give up on his life all together. that, in my opinion, is not a man who’s going to know what healthy relationships would look like, regardless of it being romantic or not. 35 year old sasori to me has the same appeal as an expired can of tuna and he’s probably very happy 6 feet under. he’s supposed to be a failed gaara in that sense that he had no one to look out for him and therefore was never going to experience anything but a bad ending in life. its fine that hes dead honestly, it wraps up his short character development the best IMO.

adding to that, seriously, sakura was obviously interested in knowing why he was that way, and called him out for being seriously fucked in the head, but it’s weird to me that people assume she had any interest in actively rehabilitating him, let alone starting a serious romantic relationship with him. sakura who’s not only very, uhm, immature and straight forward when it comes to her romantic viewpoints also, as a big bootlicker, wouldnt soil her standing in the village by starting anything with a disgraced and far too gone criminal like sasori. shipping that version of sasori with sakura intimately is still going to set her up for a huge power imbalance that would be difficult to handle imo, even if she was the one in the fight ultimately exerting her power over him. i would still look at it and think damn she deserves better than having to play therapist for man like that lol.

additionally, even if you ignored all of this, you cant really ignore that sasori had already known her as a child, and that had been his first and most impactful impression of her. i dont think that sasori would look at 35 year old sakura and see her as a grown woman and not the little green girl she was in the fight. plus, you easily fall into predatory comparison territory between the “childish” and “womanly” and i have seen way too often in fic just being boiled down to her now being fuckable. a lot of of ships do this and i would just like to remind yall thats it not normal for adults to want to start relationships with children they have seen grown up or known as a child when they themselves were fully grown adults. therefore, maybe if sakura hadnt met sasori before it would be less of a problem? but that also obviously defeats the point of the dynamic and the reason he died in the first place. so yeah, it sounds kind of doomed especially if you were to make it romantic.

WHICH BRINGS ME TO THE SECOND QUESTION

let me preface this that im not fundamentally against age gaps, even if im not super interested in it. after all, colorblind had a 5 yr age gap (with sakura being 21), even if, say, i wrote similar fics today i probably would make it smaller lol. i think it can be handled well if both parties have enough life experience to deal with it, and the author is cautious of where the age gap starts, i think a 10+ year age gap would be fine in a scenario where the younger party (i guess sakura) was at least 25-27ish, meaning she has completed most of her most formative life stages and probably had been in relationships before, meaning she would be able to handle it without having to fear a huge power imbalance. the older the younger party is the less the age gap is going to matter tbh .TsukiHoshino and AngelOfDeath10 both handle age gaps in their fics really well imo, so i do not mind reading about them.

unfortunately, a lot of people in this fandom think making sakura barely "”””legal””””” (18, not even 20 which is hilarious to me because the source material is obviously japanese) because they both cannot stand her being past her “prime years” of being young fertile and fuckable to much older men as well as thinking a 20 year old is automatically old enough to handle that type of relationship. ive seen a lot of unironic takes that believe it will absolve them of callout posts if they throw around age of consent and “shes 18 now suckers!!!” enough lmfao. absolutely hilarious. aging a minor up without aging the adult down seriously reeks of predatory “cant wait until youre 18″ narratives and thats why i find it similarly disturbing as straight up pedo shipping.

ultimately, sasosaku is and will always be a inherently problematic ship in canon, which is why i think it should always be handled a little more responsibly in fandom spaces, ignoring or outright excusing the main problem factor, which is sasori, isnt going to convince anyone that the dynamic in itself is well written and interesting enough to explore in aus, like giving sasori the redemption most of us wanted him to have by aging him down to a point in time where he was still realistically going to allow being positively influenced, similar to gaara.

so really, what i think is well handled age gap and how most people handle age gap in the naruto fandom are two different worlds at times lol

tl;dr

canon shippers have never been anything but gross when i was younger and i didnt wanna be like that, even if youre “smart”enough to differenate, actual creeps dont really care and might use your content to blur the lines, sasori isnt rly redeemable so romantic canonverse realistically wouldnt make much sense and is still iffy, age gaps are fine if they are handled well, but given that the dynamic doesnt really need the age gap to still work im not that invested on making that an essential part of my shipping experience.

thank you for reading and hope this makes sense!

#nonitxt #meta #another hot take from me #but seriously if you're offended over these #unfollow me lol idc #defending predatory content is not a hill im gonna die on in this life

36 notes · View notes

tangerinegod · 4 years

Note

Hello! I am sorry to bother you but I am a senior getting ready for college this year. I am in the US and I wanted to major in the same thing you did, do you have any possible tips for me? I still haven't even looked for colleges that would be best for animation majors so I figured if you were up to giving out any tips/saying any basic ideas if you wanted to/if you had the time to then maybe I'll have a better idea! I apologise for if I sound weird! I'm tried to word it correctly but I can't 😿

hi!! i’m totally down to share my experiences! someone else also had some questions so i’m going to put them all together in this post haha, hopefully this helps! it’ll get pretty long so apologies ahead of time but art school is a lot to think about so i wanna be as helpful as i can around it, its a lot of time and money. I’m gonna put it all under a read more cus it is really really long!

i wanna start off with the fact that I had the privilege of attending school in a financially stable environment, my parents were/are really supportive so w merit scholarship i only came out with around 20-30k in debt and i also had housing support my entire time in school. they were ok with me focusing on academics so i didn’t hold a retail job unless i was out of school like summer/winter break. Ofc though i regularly take commissions/do merch/cons to try and pay for all bills that arent rent cus i did want to be financially independent where it was possible. I also did try and work during the semester but everytime i did my body would deff start to breakdown from the fact that i didnt wanna compromise schoolwork with jobs.. so just read ahead know this experience is from a student who was able to attend focusing only on school work for most of the time!

the biggest thing is knowing art school is not required to become a professional in either freelancing or industry! there are a huuuge amount of online tools and classes these days that provide the exact same education and for cheaper too. i think it depends on what experience you prefer/can handle/want but it’s definitely possible to make art/animation art your living without higher education. the thing that college will for sure give you though is the ability to meet deadlines, work even when you dont want to, and connections with peers+teachers. i think the connections part is invaluable because you’re basically coming out with a network of people you already know and who know you!

also its good to know if you want to attend/can handle art school! it’s a lot of time and energy and students get burned out really fast. the best piece of advice i got before going was ‘if you draw every single day, even if its for only like 5-10 minutes or a doodle for a whole year you should be fine’ consistency is super key because you’re attending school to draw, and you’ll have to create work for stuff you aren’t excited for at some point or another. burnout is extremely real and the only reason i didn’t experience it was probably because i got super into drawing naruto fanart again inbetween sophomore and junior year! it helped give me something to draw seperated from school which is the only thing i was drawing for since i had entered rip. a heads up id also consider myself a workaholic so i fit in ok with the ‘art school’ environment but it is suuper unhealthy. if you are fantastic at managing your schedule then it’s definitely possible to take care of yourself! freshman year i got 8 hours a sleep a night and only pulled all nighters for some second semester finals at the end. sophomore year + up though i ended up prioritizing hw over sleep and like for sure, definitely shortened my life span. there’s another q down below where i’ll go more into detail but ya, be careful w ur work balance!

another tip especially for animation is knowing for a fact what type of animation you’re looking to go into, and what the school is offering. I didn’t think i’d get into art school at the time so i only applied to two places + decided if i didnt get into either id attend community to get credits out of the way while building portfolio. honestly? i did not do a lot of research LOL but like i did end up having the chance to tour and stuff! just know that each school will have a very different curriculum. The main differences are schools that prioritize 3D (cg animation, cg modeling, ect) and 2D/traditional (hand drawn, ‘oldschool’, digital or traditional based) this is a huge difference so make sure you do research for it! in most cases a 2D/traditional program will also offer 3D since it’s at the forefront of the industry animation wise rn. My school taught 2D but like hand drawn on physical paper 2D, frame by frame. while it was a good experience it’s super outdated because digital tools make it way faster + easier! i’d recommend looking for a program that is digital 2D over traditional 2D.

if after your senior year covid is still affecting campuses in the US to keep them shut down i’d recommend attending a community college to get credits and then transferring into school. one of the negatives is paying money for gened classes when ur not there for them; if you can get them out of the way sooner and cheaper there is absolutely no negative + you could graduate earlier or use the extra time for better work or to work a job!

these are all the general tips i think i’d give on like a broad basis of attending or not to think about? let me know if u have more q’s! someone asked q’s im answering below that go more into personal experiences + work culture so heres those:

- how many hours a week do u spend studying, in class, otherwise making art? like how much of ur life does it consume?

I was basically working on art.... 24/7! since i wasnt working a job at the same time i crammed as many credits as possible into my schedule so on avg i did 18 credit semesters (around 6 classes) art classes go for 6 hours and non art go for 3, so i’d spent around 30-35 hours in class a week! hw wise it varied on the class but combined it would be around 35-50 hours a week... im guessing? on average studio classes would have 8-10 hours of hw, maybe 5 for a light week, and gened classes 5 hours w them all combined. or this was probably how things were before junior year? junior+senior year i had thesis + everything else ontop.. i’d spend around 30-40 hours on thesis a week with other classes ontop of that bc my film was super long cus im a dummy!

- is it hard going to art school n realising that altho u were probably quite talented… so is everyone else? Like. all of a sudden. ur not special and everyone seems as good as u, you know? More generally, how do u deal with comparison?

kinda?? i think instead of the idea of like you vs others it feels more of like a competition at first to be the best. this varies hugely on school culture though; my animation year was really friendly with each other and get along extremely well, so my answer to this is v different than some others who attended different schools. i think that the idea of ‘comparison’ only lasts a portion of the first year because at some point you realize that it’s not a who’s better as much as its a ‘these are my coworkers’ type thing? like healthy competition 100% because we’re all working to improve but i think most of us learned pretty early on that viewing each other as peers going into the same workforce helped a lot. also at some point everyone develops their own style/starts to develop their artistic preferences so there isn’t a way to compare whos 'better’ anymore? i dont think there ever is tbh because style is appealing based off of an individuals preferences. If anything realizing everyone else is also amazing makes you wanna work harder ig? or thats how i felt! it’s inspiring to be surrounded by so many people who create such amazing work.

- is there a lot of workaholic culture? all nighter culture?

100000% there can be a workaholic and all nighter culture. i know people who avoided it and thats honestly fantastic because i fall super easily into that pit. sometimes i’ll pull all nighters on a personal project just because i really want to finish it... i am definitely considered a workaholic all the way through and its not healthy rip... i’d estimate at the worst i was pulling 2-3 all nighters a week and only 4-5 hours of sleep on the nights i didn’t? that was only for one year tho, after that i was like yeah ok this is really bad for my health in the long run LOL so i tried to cut it down to one all nighter a week and around 5-6 hours of sleep the rest of the week! by senior year my decision to cram in full semesters paid off and i was able to consistently get around 7 hours of sleep a night + no all nighters minus finals since my schedule was lighter despite thesis 😭 while there is that culture i don’t think people view it as like a badge of honor or something to be proud of anymore which is good, we mostly view it as a flaw of the art school system and something that needs to be fixed!!

- are you glad u did it? how did u know it was what u wanted?

i am glad i did it! i’m definitely in a limbo right now of if it was worth both my time, money, and my parents money rip but i think with what i got out of it i definitely wouldn’t be as far skill wise or knowledge wise when it comes to the art industry. i would say it was only worth it for be because i had so much support going in though so i was able to focus so much on improving. if i had only been able to put in part of the effort and not make full use of the resources provided i would honestly have a different answer..

i knew it was what i wanted when i realized i really couldn’t see myself pursuing a different profession happily! despite all the bumps and stuff im fully in love with drawing still and feel honored that it’s a field that can provide a living. my second profession choice was to go into culinary school? and third option i think going was into music cus i was also a band kid hehe.

- how do u cope with ur hobby becoming ur job? how do u deal with art going from something u do for fun to something u do on command constantly?

i think seperating work art from personal art is important! in my case im doubling naruto into being personal work so i have something to fall back onto that isn’t work related. its been a hyperfixation for 12+ years? so drawing it at this point is just like personal art imo. some people have hobbies outside of art and only draw for their job! i think after attending classes for so long the idea of hobby turning into job feels extremely natural? also i enjoy doing it so thats a huge plus!

sorry this is SO long but i hope i answered your guys’ questions! if you have more just lmk!

#anon #ask #long post #im so so sorry this is like long as shit #ill literally tell you guys everything though art school should not feel like a mystery esp if ur planning to go into it!#Anonymous

15 notes · View notes

kenkamishiro · 5 years

Text

Ishida’s Q&A comments from YJ compilation, Part 6

2014 is an interesting year since that’s when OG ended and :re began.

I said I’d finish this by the end of April, but clearly that’s not the case lol...I’ve given myself a personal deadline of May 10 which should give me enough time to finish it plus give enough time for people to send in their questions. I’ve also decided to make each part cover an entire year instead of half a year since I noticed I get more questions done that way.

For anyone who doesn’t know about the relevant Questions to Ishida contest, please read here. You can start from Part 1 here.

The recent set of zakki:re and interview translations take a lot of time and effort, so if you enjoyed it please reblog or leave a like. Thank you!

2014

No. 1

Just under a month left of this year! What do you want to do in this time you have left?

I want to go to the dentist.

Same here.

No. 2

What new feature do you want cell phones to be equipped with?

Shaking it to charge the battery.

It’d be great if I could charge the battery by just wishing for it.

No. 3

Only a few days remain of this year! What’s the best movie you’ve seen this year?

Life of Pi.

I was recommended it by a friend who loves movies. I enjoyed it.

No. 4-5

The final issue of this year!! What was the biggest news for you in 2013?

I got my wisdom teeth removed.

Got four of them pulled out.

No. 6-7

First issue sold in the new year! Please share with us your New Year’s resolutions!

Sleeping early and waking up early.

Good luck!

No. 8

What is the rarest item you own?

The handwritten recommendation I received from Togashi Yoshihiro-sensei.

I’ve got it on precious display even now.

No. 9

Already a month has passed since 2014 has begun! What is the tastiest food you’ve had this year so far?

The Chinese bok choy stir fry in my neighbourhood.

This year the grilled pork from this African restaurant has been the most delicious so far.

No. 10

What is your number 1 most unforgettable anime in your life?

Princess Mononoke.

This year it’s Devilman Crybaby and B: The Beginning.

No. 11

What is the most expensive purchase you’ve ever made?

An LCD tablet, I suppose.

The watch I bought for my editor to celebrate his promotion, probably.

No. 12

What place or object do you want to collect data for the most right now?

Tokyo.

Doesn’t matter so long as it interests me.

No. 13

Hinamatsuri is coming soon! What doll or figure do you want the most?

A half-naked figure of Darth Maul.

Yeah, I bought one. I also remember the one whose leg broke early on.

No. 14

What phrase do you often say without thinking?

When I’ve remember something I say, “Got it.”

When I can’t remember something I say, “Let’s seeee...”

No. 15

What game have you been the most addicted to so far?

Gunparade March.

Bloodborne, I guess.

No. 16

It’s that time of year when plants start budding! What’s your favourite plant?

Tropical pitcher plants.

I’ve never even thought about it.

No. 17

When you stop by a convenience store, what do you usually end up buying?

Drinkable yogurt.

Hot hojicha.

No. 18

Which drama have you gone completely nuts over the most?

Aibou.

Game of Thrones and Breaking Bad.

No. 19

It’s back to school season! What school meal did you enjoy the most when you were a kid?

Walnut buns.

This is when I was living in Koiwa in Tokyo, but I really liked the shortcake there that was called “Kamikoiwa Elementary School cake”. I wonder if they still have it.

No. 20

What’s your favourite four-character compound word that you’ve taken a liking to?

“Mumikansou” (dull and uninteresting).

I was just answering whatever for that. For me it would be “shirimetsuretsu” (incoherent).

No. 21-22

Vacation season is coming soon. What vehicle do you want to ride in the most?

A yacht.

I don’t think that at all.

No. 23

What is your favourite ingredient in sushi?

Engawa.

I do think that.

No. 24

This question may seem out of nowhere, but what do you think you were in your previous life?

A stray dog.

I answered whatever for that one.

No. 25

What materials have you found the most useful when making your current series?

Photos of Tokyo taken by my editor.

Myself, I think.

No. 26

If it was possible, what story would you want to enter the world of?

Star Wars or Hunter x Hunter.

I’d die.

No. 27

It’s time to change clothes for the season! What is your favourite costume or attire (that you can appreciate)?

I think cosplay is amazing.

The question and the answer don’t match up...but is this question trying to expose the authors’ fetishes or something?

No. 28

June 18 is Onigiri Day! What’s your favourite onigiri filling?

Hard-boiled egg.

It’s plum!

No. 29

Which works are you eagerly awaiting the sequel for?

I’m curious about how Star Wars Episode VII will turn out.

It turned out that way.

No. 30

The rainy season is in full blast...what do you eat when you want to feel refreshed?

Soumen.

Probably soba, though soumen is fine too.

No. 31

Which manga character do you want to be friends with?

Tsukiyama.

I can tell you like Tsukiyama.

No. 32

What foods do you eat at night without thinking?

Recently it’s been tofu.

Recently it’s been celery.

No. 33

What’s your favourite attraction at an amusement park?

I’m scared of roller coasters.

The food court I guess.

No. 34

What’s the name of a character who you feel has good fashion sense?

Ei Bi from Kingdom.

It’s because his helmet looks like a shrimp.

No. 35

If you became an entertainer/celebrity for a day who would you want to be?

Shitara from Bananaman.

“That’s right”, huh.

[T/N: Probably one of Shitara’s punchlines during the Bananaman skits.]

No. 36-37

Summer II 24 hour television! What’s something that you can keep doing for 24 hours?

Working on manga.

Hahaha.

No. 38

It’s summer vacation season! What independent research project do you want to do now?

Study anatomy.

Are you feeling ill or something?

No. 39

What’s a mascot character that you like?

Darth Maul.

Kumamon of course!

No. 40

Which foreigners are you paying attention to now?

Orlando Bloom.

The character Jane from The Mentalist.

No. 41

What’s your mobile ringtone that you’ve set up or want to set up?

A rotary dial.

Anything is fine.

No. 42

What quote or proverb do you want to try saying once?

I have the higher ground!

Human life lasts only 50 years, Contrast human life with life of Geten, It is but a very dream and illusion.

[T/N: First quote is from Star Wars Episode III said by Obi-Wan Kenobi. Second quote is said by Oda Nobunaga.]

No. 43

If there was a showdown where you thought, “This is a great match!”, what would it be?

[On break.]

Naruto vs. Sasuke in the valley.

No. 44

Yearly present! If you could accept something what would you want?

[On break.]

Tasty nuts.

No. 45

Autumn is decorated with the colours of black tea! What picturesque scenery/secluded area do you want to visit once?

[On break.]

I think this break period was when I was drawing :re...

No. 46

If you could visit the house of a celebrity once, whose house would you visit?

Gackt-san’s.

Celine Dion’s house.

No. 47

When you see the phrase “last boss”, who comes to mind?

Ultimecia from Final Fantasy 8.

Pepsiman from Final Fantasy 9 is also hard to discount.

[T/N: He means Necron, but JP’s nickname for him is Pepsiman because...he looks a lot like Pepsiman.]

No. 48

Any fantasy creatures you want to be real?

Vampires.

Gods.

No. 49

If you could get your hands on a 3-D printer what’s the first thing that you’d want to make?

A bone sample.

I wouldn’t make it because it sounds like too much of a hassle.

No. 50

Any works that had an amazing ending?

Hoshikuzu Nina.

Amen to that.

No. 51

It’s chilly, any drinks you want because of this weather?

Water.

Hojicha!

No. 52

What group or team do you want to join?

supercell.

The Marvel heroes.

previous || next

#Tokyo Ghoul #zakki:re #Ishida Sui #Ishida Q&A #Translations #my translations #i love how he mentioned jane #he watches the mentalist <3 <3

73 notes · View notes

eleanor-devil · 5 years

Text

Naruto Fanfic - Boruto: Sacrifices - Chap.29, Replenished Hopes

IMPORTANT: It would be very very appreciated if you reblogged it and left a comment. We get lots of likes/favs but almost no comments, so please everyone, leave a comment, it encourages us to continue.

We’re one chapter away from the end!

Written by my friend @mirage-05

Cover by @eleanor-devil

prologue, chap.1, chap.2, chap.3, chap.4, chap.5, chap.6, chap.7, chap.8, chap.9, chap.10, chap.11, chap.12, chap.13, chap.14, chap.15, chap.16, chap.17, chap.18, chap.19, chap.20, chap.21, chap.22, chap.23, chap.24, chap.25, chap.26, chap.27, chap.28, chap.29, chap.30

For more Boruto: Sacrifices stuff, click on this link

Chapter 29 - Replenished Hopes

Time was moving slow and steady... healing anything and everything it could. Being allowed this second chance, Mitsuki was savoring every minute of it, spending it with his friends, with his family... After he came home, Karin especially didn't want to leave immediately, despite the fact that staying in Konoha was becoming too much for them. But the woman didn't care about such trivial things because... His birthday was fast approaching. It still all felt like a blur, the day they celebrated Himawari's, and he had once again been invited to the Uzumaki household by an overly excited Boruto. Mitsuki couldn't help but smile when he thought about what his best friend could possibly coop up - he had learned from Sarada the full details about the blond's birthday, after all. He had the feeling that these birthdays will become a competition between him and Boruto. Two days before that arrangement, though, Karin took it upon herself to prepare a celebratory dinner (complete with the cake and everything) - both for him making through a very hard time and his special day. Being practically reborn, Mitsuki was glad for this opportunity with his family... because they were to leave town the following morning. That cast a gloom over all of them, no matter how light-hearted the setting was. That was another thing. Something was bothering the young boy, especially when he looked at his father and older brother. Not that he wasn't used to them being antagonistic towards each other... but that, he realized, was precisely the thing. That night, they seemed to be almost... ignorant of each other, and the coldness between them was almost palpable, like the room was coated in ice.

Mitsuki found himself honestly wishing that they would start bickering again, even on this day. But none offered the other an opportunity. It was like whatever that fueled their already edgy relationship was gone... and it actually bothered the boy more than seeing their animosity towards each other.

Not that Log leaving as soon as the dinner was done did any good. "Happy birthday, little brother," he said with a smile in place that he only reserved for him. "Make sure you don't give us a scare like this on your next one." He reached to ruffle his hair like he used to do when Mitsuki was younger, causing him to deftly duck away. "I'll keep in mind," the younger boy confirmed with a smile of his own, but soon he was serious once again. "Log... about father-" Log put up his hand to intervene. "Let's not go there. I don't want to dampen our mood." Mitsuki had a little frown in his features, which made the older brother snicker. "Don't feel so bad about it, Mitsuki. It's not like me and Orochimaru had a rosy past as it is." "Yeah, but it never quite came to this point..." "Eh, well. Things like these eventually come down one way or another." The younger boy still didn't look too happy with it. "Hey, I told you, stop worrying about it. And who knows, I might be seeing you a lot more often in the near future." "What's that even mean?" asked Mitsuki, baffled. "You'll find out soon," Log turned away, raising his hand in farewell. "Until then." And he started walking away into the night, leaving an appalled Mitsuki behind. ... He couldn't explain exactly why... but the departure of his family the following day was even harder. Even though he was unconscious or in the hospital most of the time here... the boy was feeling that their presence here was empowering in and on itself. He didn't exactly feel like he was ready to see them go. "We would stay if we could," Juugo tried to explain, an almost apologetic expression on his face. "But we're already putting Konoha's hospitality to a test." "Although thanks to your feat we did gain some ground in the village." Suigetsu said cheerfully, before clipping Mitsuki on the back, making the boy glad that his ribs had long since healed. "Way to go kid!" This, in turn, earned the Hozuki a smack up his head by Karin. "Do you even realize how obnoxious that sounds?!" Not waiting for a reply, the redhead turned to the boy and gave him a warm and almost crushing hug, as best as she could. "Do take care of yourself, Mitsuki, and stay out of trouble... I can't stand the thought of something happening to you, and besides..." there were tears in her eyes as she stepped back and put a hand on her huge belly, softly smiling. "I'd love to have you around to meet Miu, y'know..." Her motherly tone had made Mitsuki tear up too, but he couldn't help a small laugh when he heard her words. "So you guys finally decided on a name?" "Yep." Karin's smile was as bright as the sun. "I just realized that was a name I always wanted for my daughter." "It sounds beautiful," he reassured her, not that it would have mattered. "It means feathers, right?" "It does," Suigetsu said pridefully. "Feathers on a demon lantern..." The boy kept his smile as he shook his head, finding it somehow astounding that these two were in such harmony when it comes to their child. And then it was his father's turn... Mitsuki stared up at him for only a moment before striding forward for a hug, finding it much easier to do nowadays. "Thank you..." he whispered. "Thank you for being here... for giving me the chance to start healing... truly." "I never thought that would be something I was capable of," the sannin said, in a quiet but also soft tone that Mitsuki came to believe was only reserved for him. "Bringing the best out of me... as best as it could be of course... you accomplished no small feat, child." The boy smiled softly to himself, finally, years and years later... finding something in his soul that resonated with his father's. That realization, however... didn't come without an afterthought. "I meant to ask..." he slowly pushed himself away from his father, to have a better look in his eyes. "What happened to Log? Or rather... what will...?" The look in his father's eyes hardened for a moment, though it was so fleeting that the boy could easily think that he had imagined it, more so when he heard the impartial tone of his voice soon after. "I don't know what is going on through his mind... and I intend not to push it further. If he's not coming back with us... that's his decision." Mitsuki waited for a bit for him to elaborate. "That's it?" he asked incredulously when the man didn't. "You... you don't mind him going off on his own?" "I don't deny him his free will." was Orochimaru's curt reply, leaving Mitsuki trying to decipher whether he was as impassive as he let it shown. It seemed cold even for the sannin, especially after their own relationship took a turn for the better. What was it that was different with Log...? "Another thing is..." All traces of the earlier conversation left the sannin's face as an uncanny look settled in his eyes. "There is one more who can't wait to speak to you again." The boy was baffled for a moment. "But who...?" Then, as he kept staring at his father's eyes, gold and snake-like, it suddenly dawned on him. "Oh." he breathed, eyes wide. "You don't just summon your contract and then leave her clueless for a month." Now there was amusement in his tone. The boy had begun sweating a little - he had rarely seen Isis angry before, mostly in the presence of his pet snake, Koburo, and it wasn't really something he was looking forward to. Who would have thought that a summoning animal had such a colorful vocabulary? "You're right," he finally amended with a sigh. "I'm gonna talk to her first chance I got." The answering smirk didn't leave Orochimaru's face as he and the Taka started making their way out of the gates. Mitsuki kept gazing after them until their speeding forms became a blur, and then sighed again before drawing out blood and making the sign for summoning. It was a weird reunion - making the boy wonder whether snakes could go in for a hug or not. But then, he thought, maybe he should be glad not to find it out right then. "Mitsuki-sama!" Isis hissed in excitement as soon as she appeared, slithering on the forest floor in what appeared to be joy. "You have no idea how worried I was!" "I'm sorry," the boy said sheepishly, feeling a little touched that Isis cared about him to this extent... and was she this tall when he last saw her? "It's not that pleasant in the Ryuuchi cave, just so you know," the snake continued in disdain. Mitsuki couldn't help a small chuckle then. "Not in good graces with the bigger snakes?" The hiss now was in a more warning tone. "I can fend off for myself, thank you very much. Although that Garaga tends to get very annoying..." Mitsuki started laughing, and the richness of his tone took him by surprise. "You can tell me all about it on our way back." And so they headed back into the village, to his home, Mitsuki listening to her time in her birthplace eagerly. A few of the passerbys who greeted him took a moment to stare at the snake but no one bothered to intervene. Mitsuki knew that he probably shouldn't exert the amount of chakra that he was using right now, at least not for a while, but he just couldn't bring himself to send Isis back in such a short time after she spent a month away. "Next time you're not gonna be able to send me away. I'll be right beside you, protecting you." she vowed vehemently. They had reached his apartment suite. The boy came to a stop. He... really didn't expect another visitor today. The woman had heard their voices. She turned to them, adjusting the paper bag in her arms so that it wouldn't fall over. A smile spread across her face. "'morning, Mitsuki," she said lightly. "I was hoping to catch up to you before I head west." "Izumi-san..." he mumbled, still baffled, causing the woman to chuckle softly. "Really, how many times must I tell you to just call me Izumi?" Beside him, Isis's hiss was inconspicuous. "Mitsuki-sama, is this woman bothering you? Shall I bite her?" "Umm, no." Shaking his head to clear it up, Mitsuki addressed the kunoichi. "Why don't you come in?" It soon turned out that Izumi did not just drop in for a casual visit - inside the bag were all the ingredients necessary for a full-on breakfast. "I thought maybe we could have breakfast together." she said cheerfully. "Thanks... I would love that." the boy replied, not sure what else to say more. The situation still seemed a little strange, but he didn't feel awkward. He was somehow... used to this laxed attitude of hers after all, even feeling comforted by it. He had not seen Izumi-san too often, one more time in their field trip to Kirigakure, but that had never been the determining factor in their relationship. She was just such an easy person to get along with. "Please, let me help you-" "No, no, none of that." the redhead almost shooed him from in front of the kitchen counter, earning herself a glare from Isis that only Mitsuki noticed. "Consider this an early birthday celebration." "O-oh." Now came the being uncomfortable part - he didn't want to be an inconvenience to her. "You don't have to do that..." "Nope, I don't have to. But I want to." She put her hand on his shoulder, her eyes warm. "Because we are friends, right? And friends do look out for each other." He smiled, a bit timid but natural all the same. "You're right. But if there's anything I can help with, I'll do it." "You just sit down and make yourself comfy." It was kinda amazing how she almost acted like she was the one living here. Then she drew a little closer to him to whisper. "But do keep an eye on your snake for me, okay?" Mitsuki did let out a small laugh. So the woman wasn't oblivious. He made his way to the sofa, and found Isis curled up beside it. "Behave," he whispered to her in an undertone. "Behave? I'm on my best behavior!" Well... considering some of their fights with Koburo, Mitsuki had to admit that she had a point. It didn't take Izumi too long - actually, soon enough, the boy had started to smell something delicious. Was she somehow aware of his favorite dish? He was left mystified - and inexplicably warm, once again feeling as if he is on familiar territory with this woman. "Would you like some coffee?" he offered, raising his voice, just so he had something to do. Izumi peeked over her shoulder at him. "You drink coffee?" "Well... yeah..." he sounded confused. "I did gain a favor to filter coffee this year..." "I don't usually comment on people's choices, but... I don't know, Mitsuki," her smile was both sheepish and somehow stern enough to remind him of Karin. "You had a difficult heart surgery... filter coffee probably won't be the best idea." "Or we could do with some tea," he mumbled, mollified. She didn't have any objections to that, and they didn't talk much as Mitsuki busied himself with making the tea. He needed that - because otherwise, the thoughts in his head were going to jumble in a mess. He knew their intentions were good, so it was not like he was begrudging them for their attitude, but... it still didn't make it right when he already felt like he was failing so many people. There, he finally laid it out in front of him. While everyone around him lately treated him with great respect and reverie, as if he was some kind of a hero, he was... nothing short of terrified at how things looked up for him at this point. He remembered it like yesterday, the talk with Sakura-san and Tsunade-sama. They had tried to be nice about it, but no matter how they were delivered, the implications were still ghastly for him. He had suffered major damage to his heart, after all, and he had to go through a vigorous and complicated healing process, practically living in the hospital from now on. Both women were vague about how much his ninja life would be affected, but also made sure that he realized how important it was that he should draw back as soon as they sensed something was going wrong. Which was such a scary thought that he had started losing sleep over it. If he wasn't going to be able to become a ninja, to continue on the path... then what? What would become of him? All he knew, ever since he had been little, was how to be cunning, aggressive and deadly as a ninja. He didn't know - had no idea - how to become anything less. And more than that, more than feeling inept... "Here you go." "Hmm?" He was a little disoriented when he raised his head and realized that he was already sitting on the table, and Izumi had just placed a table of scrambled eggs in front of him. Had he become so automatic, so... robotic in his moves to not notice what he was doing? "Thanks," he mumbled, picking up his fork. They ate in silence for a while. The woman had even reserved some of the meal for Isis, who was happily nibbling at it on the floor. Mitsuki didn't know if the kunoichi did this on purpose, to gain some favors from the snake, because if that was her intention, it seemed to be working. "There is something bothering you." Izumi said after a while, not in a questioning manner. The boy realized that he wasn't keeping his expression quite as blank as he had hoped. "What makes you think so?" he asked evasively, not sure how he could even launch into his worries. The woman chuckled lightly. "Two things. One, a small crease immediately appears between your brows, indicating you are in deep thought. And two... you become too still. No one can stay that still for so long." Mitsuki raised an eyebrow, impressed somehow. "I didn't know that." "You would be surprised." The redhead's expression turned serious again. "So... wanna talk about it?" It took him a while to realize that he was absent-mindedly toying with the food. "I don't know how to tell what's on my mind..." "Give it a try?" Izumi put her fork down, bringing a hand under her chin as she regarded him carefully. "I can wait - I have a bit of a time." He looked up at her, curious now. "You leaving for Kiri?" "Yup. I have stalled my return a bit longer as it is... but never mind that now." Her gaze turned intense, but she didn't say another word. Mitsuki too put his fork down with a sigh. Something about that look... prompted him to speak, no matter how hard it was. "You want to know what the worst part of it all is?" he began, his hands finding their way to his teacup, just to have a hold on something, to ground him. "Everyone... everyone in the village started treating me like I'm special... they shunned me at first, when the orphanage was attacked, but then had a change of heart because I did something rash and landed myself in the hospital..." "And it bothers you that they were so prejudiced about you before?" the woman guessed. "That's not all of it..." No need to say how major a part it was. "But thinking back on it... people only began respecting me because I was able to do it... to save the village from a possible catastrophe... and now... now that might be taken from me..." "Taken how?" "It's not yet clear... whether I can turn back to my old life, y'know." His fingers tightened a little more around the cup. "It's still early to say, but... ninja life could be too much for me..." The woman didn't say anything to that, just listening. "And I... well I don't know... what I would do without it... it's everything I know, everything I lived with..." He shook his head slowly. "The thought that I probably snuffed all those chances out... It's much more than what I can stand." A small, knowing smirk played on Izumi's lips. "No, I never took you for a boy who could just stand aside and let the world roll by." "More than that..." His gaze was directed in her general direction, but he wasn't really seeing her. "You know... the whole reason I came to Konoha... why I wanted to become a ninja... was so that I..." his voice dropped to a whisper. He didn't even know if she could hear him anymore. "...that I give my father a reason to be proud of me..." Compassion began to replace the pensive look in the woman's eyes. "Oh..." she mused softly. Mitsuki dropped his gaze to his hands, not wanting to face that compassion. "That's... that's what bothers me the most... that I probably flunked my chance to make him proud in a moment of rash action..." Izumi didn't reply immediately, seeming to gather her thoughts. "Mitsuki-" she began a moment later, but he cut her off instantly. "Please don't tell me I should disregard these thoughts and just focus on getting better," he said, his tone a little irritated. "I already have that from the medics, my sensei, my friends... just don't. It doesn't make things better." "I was not going to say that." she amended. "I wasn't." she insisted when the boy simply looked doubtful. "But do tell me... how do you feel? What would you like to do instead?" There was no hesitation in his tone as he replied. "I want to prove everyone that I'm still on my game, that I'm still capable of this life." He bent a little down to pat Isis's head. Wasn't it already proof enough that he could keep her around for this long, without breaking a sweat? "Because the way I see it..." The redhead leaned a bit forward to try to look in his eyes. "All you have to do is to go out there and grab what you want, and don't listen to anyone else as long as you know and respect your limits." "My limits?" Mitsuki asked, confused. "It's just that, everyone will have a guess about what's hurtful or what's tiring for you, right? Like me earlier, with the coffee," she added with a knowing smile, making the boy to suddenly become a little awkward. "But you are the one living in that body and you know your own limits, how much you can handle. As long as you know the right moment to stop, I don't see a reason why you shouldn't keep trying." "You really think so?" It was such a different attitude to what he had been subjected to, Mitsuki was simply amazed. To take control of his own destiny... that was all he wanted, all he asked for. No one before had taken this approach with him though... Now he was seeing Izumi-san in a whole new light. "Well, you are talking to the person who defied her own mother in career choices," the kunoichi said with a small chuckle. "No one knows you better than you do Mitsuki... so don't let anyone stump on whatever you want to do with your life." "Even if it means I got to drink filter coffee?" the blue haired boy asked shrewdly, and then laughed at the taken aback expression on the woman's face. But she started laughing after a second, too. "You got me there. But first let's finish our breakfast, we will speak about this more later." "Gladly," the boy replied, a little amazed at how sincere he sounded. Maybe... just maybe there was a reason for him to keep his hopes up. ... And that was how Mitsuki found himself in the practice ground next morning, after some much needed sleep. Somehow, he was always sleepy lately. He was practicing basic shuriken jutsu... or well, it was supposed to be basic anyway. His infuriation kept growing, more and more with each throw. It felt like each throw triggered some dull pain in his chest, making his hand jerk in the last minute. And no matter how tiny that jerk was... the shuriken kept flying in odd directions. It was best not to mention that his bending skill had grown pretty much non-existent. He puffed his cheeks in an exhale, glaring at his target, as if this was its fault. Respect one's limits... but how was he supposed to do that, when even something as easy as shuriken practice had become a task...? Suddenly, he saw something flash in his peripheral vision. On instinct, he drew around and pulled a kunai from under his sleeve in one quick motion, knocking the shuriken thrown at him in the last moment. A soft chuckle made him glance in what had to be the direction of the throw. He met the warm eyes of Sarada, who still had her hand in the air, and the huge grin of Boruto. "See?" the Uchiha said joyfully, dropping her hand. "You are not out of shape after all." And then, without a warning, they both lunged forward. The element of surprise lasted for only about five seconds, and then the blue haired boy was keeping up with his friends. Sloppily, he would've said in any other situation, but he managed to evade most of their attacks, just receiving one punch on his arm from Boruto one time. The best part of it was... that he could tell their friends weren't holding back all too much. This was all in the context of sparring rules - Mitsuki felt his spirit rising with each moment. "There you guys are!" Momentarily distracted by the voice, Boruto slipped... and Sarada's fist connected. "Ouch!!" "Whoops...! Sorry..." Shikadai was descending the stairs to reach them, with what looked like a tablet computer in his hands. His usual carefree smirk was in place as he took the scene in. "Sorry about that," he said lightly. "But she was literally pestering me to come find Mitsuki and so..." "Hey!" A female voice resounded from the tablet. The Nara sighed in annoyance and rolled his eyes as he took the last few steps and reached Team Konohamaru. "Sheesh, calm down already will you? I found your boyfriend-" "Shikadai!!!" The scream was surely heard all around the training area as Shikadai gave the tablet to a baffled Mitsuki, who looked down to see a dark pink haired girl with big, brown eyes... and a very deep blush. "Where did you even- oh... hi Mitsuki," the girl said warmly, her eyes shining. Her blush receded, only leaving a light sheen of pink on her cheeks. "Hey, we're here too, y'know," Boruto said almost indignantly, but his tone was light. "Sorry," Shikadai's cousin, Natsumi said with a kind natured laugh. "But Dai told me Mitsuki was awake, and I just wanted to check in myself." "Oh... thank you." The blue haired boy smiled. "How are things in Suna?" "They're great," the girl said cheerfully. "But never mind that now... I-I'm just so glad..." she stopped for a minute to still her breathing. "I'm so glad you finally made it... It's been too long..." "I know... sorry about it..." Natsumi laughed softly. "What are you saying sorry for? Being brave and selfless? It was nothing I didn't expect from you..." And then a light blush colored her cheeks once again. "C'mon, let's give them a minute." Sarada told the boys, taking each of them by their arms. "Hey, come visit us again Konpeito!" Boruto called as he was being towed away. The girl on the screen rolled her eyes, but her smile was still intact. "Look who's talking about visits," she mumbled, and then turned her attention back to the blue haired boy. "And also... happy birthday Mitsuki! I hope you will have a great day." "Actually, I'm certain Boruto will see to it," Mitsuki chuckled to himself. "I wish I could be there in person but... academy..." "Well, there's always next year..." "That's a promise then," Natsumi concluded. "I have to go now, I have practice with mom, so see you around, okay?" As the video screen blackened, Mitsuki felt he was feeling even more optimistic than this morning... ... The day flew by too quickly after that. Before he knew it, he had joined the Uzumakis in their living room with Sarada and Sakura, them chanting the birthday song as Hinata brought the cake. "Alright, make a great wish!" Boruto said, his smile bright as the sun. "Thirteen is an important age, 'ttebasa!" Sarada, sitting next to him, nudged him light-heartedly. "Are you planning to say this every time we have a birthday?" "Well, there's nothing wrong with it!" the blond defended himself. "Not at all," Mitsuki laughed, content, feeling like he could stand to hear Boruto say that as many times as it would take. But he did exact a good amount of thought on his wish. Keeping this bond with his family and friends for as long as they lived... that sounded like a reasonable goal. Smiling to himself, he blew out the candles, receiving a round applause. Sitting there, surrounded by the people who obviously loved him, and eating delicious homemade cake, full courtesy of Sakura-san and Sarada, it indeed felt like his dream was within his easy reach. Boruto jumped to his feet immediately after they were finished with the cake. "Time for presents." "Where's the fire?" Naruto mumbled under his breath, but his smile too was huge and genuine. The boy really didn't expect much - he didn't expect presents at all, really - but... it warmed his heart to an extent he didn't know was possible. First was Sakura. Mitsuki's eyes widened in wonder when she handed him a... "I... but this..." he couldn't form a sentence, causing the pink haired woman to chuckle softly. "I was tipped off that you are interested in medical studies. I thought this might come in handy in the near future." He barely tore his eyes apart from the medic kit to stare at her. "Thank you..." "But you'll have plenty of time to go through it," Sakura continued with a knowing smile. "These two won't be able to wait out for too long." And it was Boruto and Sarada's turn. Whatever that was wrapped in the gift packs they had, seemed to be a little crudely packed, making it impossible to guess what it could be, and the boy tore at the packages curiously. And then he started laughing. They were hand-made photo frames, and each of them showcased pictures of him and his friends - but that wasn't the only thing that made them so special. Boruto and Sarada had both decorated the frames with drawings, and the blond's... lack of skill made his frame just as endearing as Sarada's perfect lines. "Thank you, both of you..." he said, still smiling. "And here is mine." With Hinata-san's voice Mitsuki turned to the woman. Instead of a package though, she was holding... what seemed to be folded clothes out for him. As he recognized the outfit on the top, a wondrous look etched into his eyes. He slowly traced his fingers on the two-toned blue fabric, feeling a... strange sense of reunion. "It was almost damaged beyond repair," Hinata said softly. "But I couldn't give up without a try and so... here we are." Something in her tone made the blue haired boy feel warm all over... like Hinata had just conveyed in her words how the Uzumaki family never gave up on him... "Hinata-san..." "Hey, try on your Uzumaki sweater too!" Himawari said with a big grin. "Hima, we're in July it's a little too hot for that," Boruto reminded his sister, but Mitsuki tried it on anyway. It felt soft and comfortable... like home... "Thank you very much..." he told the woman sincerely, not knowing what else to say. "Dad, dad, let's show Mitsu-nii our present now!" the youngest Uzumaki's excitement was hard to contain. "Yep." Naruto rose from his seat and looked at him. "Okay Mitsuki... can you come upstairs with us for a minute?" And so they moved the party upstairs... in a manner of speech. Mitsuki wondered what got everyone so interested about this gift. They stopped in front of the house's guest room. Himawari, right behind him, put her hands over his eyes, catching him by surprise. "No peeking," she warned cheerfully. He heard the door opening and then the light switch clicking. There was some scuffling, and finally Hima pulled her hands back with a, "Ta-daa!" He was looking at a fully-furnished room. Or well... more elaborately and personally decorated than any other usual guest rooms. Indeed, Sarada had just finished placing the photo frames on a shelf. "Well, we have the basics and everything... but your opinions matter the most." Naruto tried to explain, but the boy was still lost. "I... I'm not sure if I understand..." "Because this is gonna be your room, 'ttebasa!" his best friend said joyfully. "M-my room?" "Only if you want to, of course," Hinata said quickly. "But we would love to have you move in with us." "Because you see..." Naruto's eyes were soft, just like his tone. "We realized that we don't like seeing you return to that cold house all by yourself... so that's what we all want to offer you Mitsuki. A chance to return to your family at the end of the day." The boy was effectively rendered speechless. He was so taken aback that he couldn't even say if he was breathing at the moment or not. "I... I don't know what to say..." "Just say you accept it!" Boruto clapped him on the shoulder. "You know I'll just pester you endlessly about it, anyway." "And how's that giving him his own choice?" Sarada teased her friend. But it was already too late... One by one, images started to show up in front of the boy's mind eye. Coming home every night to the warmth of the Uzumaki house and to Hinata-san's delicious meals... Sitting at that desk, studying medicine as he was drinking his coffee... Himawari bringing in some cookies, bragging about the fact that she made them herself... Training or just goofing around the front lawn with her and Boruto... and welcoming Naruto home whenever they get the chance to see him for the day... "Family..." he mumbled almost to himself, feeling the warmth settle and grow around his heart. "That's right... you said you considered every one of us a family and now... let us be your family in Konoha." Mitsuki took another moment to get his emotions under control, worried that he could make a spectacle out of himself if he continued this way. "That..." he finally began, but had to clear his throat before moving on. "That's much more than I could ever ask for... and nothing would make me happier than living with you." "Is that a yes then?" Hima was practically jumping up and down with joy. The blue haired boy laughed as he ruffled her hair a bit. "Yep, Hima, that's definitely a yes." The celebrations didn't go too far this time - because Boruto had grabbed both Mitsuki's and Sarada's hands, pulling them behind him. "Alright then, let's go!" "Go? Where?" Sarada asked, mystified and a little annoyed. "To help Mitsuki pack up, duh! Tonight is his last night in that house, 'ttebasa!" As the friends kept bickering among themselves, the adults followed them downstairs, stopping just inside the door to gaze after them with soft smiles... ... It would turn out that Boruto's surprises were not yet finished. They didn't spend a lot of time in his apartment, after all, he didn't really have a lot to pack. Mitsuki had imagined going back to the Uzumaki household, but he should have his suspicions when Sarada pulled the faded old quilt from the bag of packed things, saying that they would probably need that. It was the quilt Karin knit for him before he left for Konoha. The boy had really not imagined... that their next destination was the waterfall. Mitsuki gasped lightly - it was just like how he had planned out for his best friend's birthday. The make-shift boat, the flag, the plunder... he chuckled when he realized even the parrot was there. Of course, the weather conditions had worn out everything just a little... but that made the atmosphere all the more perfect. "Happy birthday, Mitsuki," Boruto and Sarada both said, scooting a little closer to him. ... From that point, he had no idea how he came here. He was crouching behind a bolder, and he had the unsettling feeling that he was hiding from something... or someone. And one thing he knew without a doubt was that he was alone... all alone... A cold, terrifying cloud of uncertainty settled around his heart, making it thud loudly. "Come out come out wherever you are...!" he heard a voice just then, which made him cower in spite of himself. "Fucking snake brat... Takeru the cat will find you and fucking eat you alive, I swear on it!" The proximity, the animosity of the voice... Mitsuki knew he probably should start running away, or think of a way to fight back... but he was frozen on the spot, trying to fight the urge to cover his ears... A sudden, very bright light flashed, like that of a lightning... ... Sarada wasn't sure just why she woke up with a start, but she imagined it had been a few hours since they fell asleep, side by side, the quilt covering them. The sky had a purplish tint to the blackness, indicating that it was the early morning hours. She half raised herself on one of her elbows to see what might have woken her up. The first thing she noticed was that Mitsuki seemed restless. He was shivering, and there was sweat gathering on his forehead, while his expression was also distressed, even in sleep. The girl couldn't be sure whether she should wake him up or not... if he was having a nightmare, maybe this was the best course of action. But when she raised her hand to gently shake him awake... another hand clamped on her wrist. Boruto was also awake. As their eyes met, Sarada understood the blond's point of view clearly. He didn't want to wake Mitsuki up. It wouldn't exactly chase away the nightmares for long... Coming to a non-verbal agreement, the Uzumaki and the Uchiha just scooted closer to their friend, wrapping their arms around him, hoping that this would create some sort of comfort... ... The boy had run out of places to hide... they were approaching, he knew it. He wasn't going to make it out of here alive... The two men that were following him, on blond and the other brunet, were standing only a couple of feet away from him, both leering from ear to ear. The blond raised his hand and the lightning bolt appeared in it, making the blue haired boy flinch , trying to make himself a smaller target... But then, something he never would've expected happened. Suddenly, he wasn't alone. Like some sort of miracle, his best friends appeared right beside him, taking attack stances. "Don't worry Mitsuki, we fight beside you now." Boruto said, determination raw in his voice. "Shannaro!" Sarada exclaimed, her sharingan activated as she took out several shurikens. Another flash, and Konohamaru-sensei was there too. "No one messes with my students when I'm around!" he hissed through gritted teeth as he glared at the two assailants. And one by one, other people from Konoha and his home back in the hideout appeared... Log... Hinata-san... Karin... Izumi-san... and many, so many more... It was like all of his loved ones, the people who loved and cared about him, came here to his aid when it mattered the most... His attackers began backing away, panic apparent in their eyes and movements... Lord Seventh appeared just then, taking a protective stance beside him. "Protect Mitsuki at all costs!" his voice rang out clearly. The boy felt a lump forming in his throat with his words and presence... But the best was yet to come. He had just enough time to blink once... ...and then his father was standing directly in front of him, shielding him from view, tall, fierce and powerful... The scene was completed... With everyone there, ready to stand their ground with him... the boy no longer felt alone... ... The rising sun shone on the sleeping forms of Team Konohamaru, gently illuminating their peaceful expressions.

#boruto #naruto #sacrifices #mitsuki #sarada #orochimaru #log

8 notes · View notes

inhalareexhalare · 6 years

Photo

youtube

Memento mori.

Nynaeve recommended this before, and I loved it and am remembering.

It suddenly started raining.

Karu also said,

"I think I'm gonna be a terrible dad"

Out of nowhere.

We'd just been talking about his gig today about half an hour ago.

I feel a bit down that I can't seem to find the motivation to keep my work space organized, but I think that's because I put it down too much in my priority list. Dr. Seth told me to take one day off of work, to do housekeeping duties, to express how important it is to her.

Awesome.

From Karu:

Wala lang. I remember Aang being a terrible dad [It's nothing. I remember Aang being a terrible dad]

Aang was a terrible dad according to the old airbender guy from Legend of Korra

Apparently it was Katara that took care of the children cause Aang was busy being the Avatar

Kinda like how Naruto is busy being Hokage

Aang's airbender kid was also obviously favored over the non bender and the waterbender

To Karu:

Hahahahaha I see I see

We won't know until we get there, and we'll never know if we don't keep trying :)

God gave man a partner for a reason, so don't start thinking you're on your own

Outside family, there's also a reason why we're a team, remember? :) No man is an island, and no man is big enough to carry out a vision

I am technically your secretary, so don't hesitate to call for me. In fact, I'd love to help

We're still a small ship of a small crew in such a big sea, so of course it's gonna be busy

The burden gets lighter as more pillars are added, and as these pillars are slowly built with strength over time

...we teach the youth what wonders life can do :)

2018-11-07 12:00 Philippines Wednesday

BOOODLE FIIIGHT!!!!

I ATE TONS OF MEAT! Pork. Chicken. Fish!!!

I feel like I got closer with Ms. Charree.

It was the right choice to return to her side when she was left alone coincidentally. She's sociable, but also shy in many ways.

This is always a fun tradition in the Philippines hahaha! I still have a hard time eating rice with my hands though. My hands don't understand how to do it naturally.

“Privileged ignorance”

Born and bred With spoon and fed

Yes. I am one of those sheltered kids. It's one of the reasons why leaving home was particularly radical to the family tree. It seemed the natural thing to do though when words couldn't get through...

Though I think I could have tried other approaches to help them understand my thoughts. I'd never recommend leaving home abruptly.

It first assumes that you cannot trust your family. It also leaves things on a bad note.

Explorer's motto: always leave things better than when you arrived in there.

You'll have no power to fix things, but you always have the option to be kind and give love to others.

I thank God for sharing his strength and giving me courage today. I was able to smile sincerely at Dr. Seth, at Ms. Charree, at Ms. Len, Jun, Marg, and Deanne, and Cecilia—and I realized how much a tiny gesture can help lighten up someone else's day.

2018-11-07 13:00 Philippines Wednesday

youtube

Don't stop believing.

Cecilia dragged me into the Brothers' House tour with the rest of the gang. I suppose greeting them all the way to the other side at the boodle fight before returning to Ms. Charee was the right choice.

My intention to be a friend came through!

The brothers are so cool! So human. They make the most of life because they have confidence in the love of Life.

Skating, biking, childish jokes, friendships, rivalries, ambition, doubts, faith, laughter...

Being a brother, one of them said, is not about being worthy as a person, but instead about how God is worthy and all his greatness.

How very true!

To whoever’s out there:

No matter where you are in your life and no matter what position you are put into; whenever that nagging feeling comes—"do I deserve this?" remember that you ask a wrong question.

The question is always whether the cause is worth it or not. Answer that, and you'll know what to do and where to put your energy into.

We do not choose our calling, but we choose our faith and meaning.

Life always puts you where you need to be. Your sole resource is what you believe in.

Don't stop learning, don't stop growing. Be open to new ideas, but also stand up for what you believe in.

2018-11-07 14:00 Philippines Wednesday

It's funny how a person's confidence level can only either increase or decrease as the number of group mates fluctuate.

For me, my leadership instincts work better in small numbers. Big crowds tend to overstimulate me and I go quiet to reserve energy.

The commonality among everyone, I think, is that the extent that individuality is compromised is positively correlated to the number of people (that is part of the group) present.

2018-11-07 14:28 Philippines Wednesday

Don't you get it? The anomaly is us—the consciousness, the ego; entities aren't supposed to think about themselves.

Organisms act according to their survival and self-interest, but they think about and react to outside threats (or opportunities) and predators (or friends). They don't flee (or fight) thinking, "how do I defend myself?"

Rather, they think, "how do I survive from this predator?"

Get it? The focus is on the foreign object.

The same way we flail even after hours of practice just because we become overly conscious of how to do things instead of focusing on the goal which would have naturally assisted us in accomplishing it (since we already did practice and it should all have been muscle memory).

We are minor creatures, swayed and small-mindedly occupied with our shadows. No different from a cat that is enamored by a mere laser point.

This thought occurred out of nowhere. But I remember a video that can show you stuff about performance anxiety:

youtube

Still, studying the self has shown exactly how studying the self made us ineffective. Pop quiz. Do you call this a paradox, or an irony?

I rather think it's more of an irony.

2018-11-07 19:00 Philippines Wednesday

Mah keyss.

The girly not-key looks so girly and so unlike me that I like it. It says "Open your mind!" on the tiny pink heart of it.

I think this was an excess Christmas gift when I was in late elementary school days or high school and it used to be a keychain, not a key, but look what I did to it haha

I really like how Ms. Siomai smiles back at me sweetly when I greet her and when I thank them for the meal with my own smiles.

I know she's just being polite, but she seems like she can be an easy-to-talk-to friend.

God always provides enough for his people.

Thank you for this meal.

2018-11-07 20:00 Philippines Wednesday

Peak Meeting adjourned!

Exciting big quests.

“Calm Spell”

I feel sad for some reason, almost to tears But this ain't nothing And it sure as hell ain't everything.

Keep your cool. It's okay. Take it slow.

Focus.

Yana's soul is fuzzy. Like, cozy fuzzy.

She

Tries to reach out to me. In bits, in chewable pieces.

I can feel Her.

Karu and I are out to get the second half of our dinner.

We finally established at tonight's Peak meeting the curfew—23:00. Thank God. Thank you, Ira and Moira.

I don't usually draw that way by the way. I am pretty flexible with art style. The problem? I'm no practitioner. I'm just an on-and-off hobbyist. I'm not even sure I'd count it as a hobby anymore. I used to draw a lot, but then I realized my true love was words.

2018-11-08 00:32 Philippines Thursday

I cried.

A lot. From about 01:00 to 02:38.

I didn't know whether I'd write about this or not, since it's pretty much an inconvenient coincidence that caused it, but here I am.

After the meeting, Karu and I walked outside to get food, right? While walking with him, I wrote that previous entry above this.

Karu had lots of ideas and stories. He cut himself off at least twice, saying instead that I should finish my entry first since I lose my ideas pretty fast when another thing catches my interest.

Turns out he's the same. Walking together, I kind of sensed his slight frustration. But I didn't make room to dive that thought because I wasn't done finishing my thoughts for the entry yet.

We reach stoplight after stoplight, and he suggests that we can get food from a carinderia (small eatery) instead. Cheaper, healthier.

But I still wasn't done analyzing my thoughts for the entry. I kept typing and told him I leave it up to him, and that I'm good with whatever.

Then I noticed we were heading towards the convenience store instead. Only then was I done with the entry. He got my full attention.

We look at sandwiches. They seemed the best option in there.

But we only got 70 pesos. A sandwich that was even worth our time is at least 39 pesos.

I kept suggesting to him that I can go walk back to the house to get more money and he can wait in the store since I knew how much he disliked the action of going back and forth for such trivial things (even things that matter to him).

But he kept saying that my suggestion made no sense. That we had enough.

That confused me. I tried suggesting the 30-peso hotdog sandwiches. Then he said he didn't feel like eating anymore.

He entrusted the money to me and so I walked inside the convenience store while he remained outside and sat on the sidewalk.

I tried to assess the situation, and I thought maybe he liked the 39-peso sandwiches better than hotdogs, but he didn't want to make me have to resort to a hotdog sandwich just to fit the budget.

So that's exactly what I did. Maybe he'd like the sandwich. He didn't feel like eating anymore but we both knew he needed it.

And we head back home and as expected the first thing he did was light up a cigarette at the dirty kitchen.

It was quick, so I could tell he didn't want to be around people. Job, Ira, and Zenith were around.

Entering our room that I occupied was the lesser evil.

After taking our bites, he finally shared why he's so pissed.

He made his own logical assessment of his emotions.

"You are annoying sometimes."

Firstly, he said, he forgot the ideas he wanted to tell me about. Secondly, for some reason he also wanted me to make our decision as he gave suggestions on where to eat. Lastly, he really just wanted to have the time with me to walk and talk to each other.

This was the first time anything like it happened so I was deeply affected. He left the room for water and I took the chance to cry by establishing the threshold: the point where the tears are about to overflow. I wouldn't let it, and distracted myself with other thoughts until I got my neutral face back and cried silently until I reached the threshold again.

He got back, lied down, and we turned the lights off.

When I couldn't restrain my now willingly hidden tears, I turned my back against him and lied on my left side.

My tears overflowed, dying to spill everything. Everything. I did it all silently. I cried hot tears soundlessly.

He clicked his tongue, as he always did when he got pissed. Either it's because he thought I was just leaving things unfinished and going straight to sleep, or his musician ears caught the irregular breathing of my tear-soaked lungs (figuratively). (Fuck musicians.) After a minute maybe, he apologized for "getting pissed."

I wanted to say that it wasn't something he should apologize to me about, but I couldn't say a word. I knew my voice would betray my tears.

I cried some more in the quiet and then finally got the leaning-positive shade of my personality back when I was satisfied with crying my shit out. I lied down on my right this time, facing him.

I asked if he needed the blanket that was accidentally on his pillow, and he gestured a yes by lifting his head. I had a bit of trouble unfolding it, since it was in a messy fold, and was surprised that he helped me.

His hand traveled under the sheets and took my left leg so it was laying over his, as he usually did to show affection. I couldn't muster the balls to hug him as I usually did to return his affection and he sensed it, taking my left hand to let it rest on his left shoulder.

He asked me what was making me feel bad, since according to his understanding of the situation, no one was to blame. It's not wrong to want to write my journal entries. It's not wrong to want to walk and talk with your wife.

After multiple hesitations and anxiety over his patience (he repeatedly asked me what's up with such gentleness), I finally said that it's because I vowed to be a wife and a partner. But all I am is a failure. He touched my face and confirmed my tears.

It's good that I got to deal with the self-obsession somehow, as I realized halfway how my thoughts are beginning to be overly critical and close-mindedly inward. Still, I felt sad.

I felt too guilty to get over this emotionally-perceived mistake.

He said I have more "successes" than "failures," the complete opposite of him. He asked me to mount him (nothing sexual, although it did come to that later when I promoted it HAHA) so I could hug him more naturally.

I wanted to tell him he's wrong, but all I could do was shake my head to our darkness-adjusted eyes, because my voice kept breaking. I'm bad with crying.

He comforted me, saying he couldn't stay mad at me even if he wanted to, unlike his signature temper.

We basically ended on a kind note, but I still think we didn't end with the good we could have. We ended good in a way, but we still have obsessive dwellings on our respective egos. He still thinks he's a bad husband most of the time, and I still think I'm a bad wife most of the time.

We must find a way to get out of this rut. Replace the mode of thinking. It doesn't help anyone.

Also, as a note, Karu didn't know exactly how we got there either. To that conflict. We're usually more flexible than that. I'm just realized after the fact last "night" that he just came from a gig.

That could actually make sense, but I'm not ready to conclude yet.

#memento mori #parenthood #boodle fight #don't stop believing #poetry #vision #group dynamics #ego #self-obsession #performance anxiety #Bloody Roar #anxiety #spell #quote #cry #chrono3

1 note · View note