#but I also powered through and didn’t say that

[milf-murdock]

Captain

Younger!Captain John Price x Reader

Summary:  Price just got promoted to captain, and then inadvertently discovers he really likes it when you call him by his new title. Like, he really likes it. How do we celebrate this new promotion and self discovery?? By fucking in an elevator of course! Warnings: SMUT!! So much fucking smut. Established relationship. P in V. Oral (male receiving). Fingering (female receiving). Fucking in an elevator ?? Listen this is just so fucking filthy. Porn with some plot. But also of course I had to end it with fluff because I don’t know when to stop.  I don’t fucking know how elevators work. We go with it. 

Also, check out this beautiful piece of art by @ wombywoo for the most beautiful Captain Price photo inspiration

“I knew you’d look good in these new dress blues,” you smirked, brushing off invisible lint from John’s jacket with your spare hand as you admired the glint of the many medals and honorifics that decorated your husband’s chest—including the three shiny gold stars that represented his new rank. Your other hand held a pair of high heels as uncomfortable as they were stunning and you had rid your aching feet of the offending items as soon as you and John were in the relative privacy of the elevator, heading up to your hotel suite. The swanky hotel was a little surprise of yours to John, knowing he wouldn’t want to travel all the way back home after a long day of ceremony and celebration.

You and John had just left the ceremony honoring his latest promotion to Captain. It was a night full of pride, honor, and maybe just a few too many glasses of wine post-ceremony, if you were being honest. 

“I was under the impression you thought I look good in everything,” John drawled, his lips twitching upwards, a hint of a smile gracing his face. 

“Oh is that so…Captain Price,” you playfully quipped and watched as John’s lips curved upwards even more, a slight flush creeping up his neck. 

You opened your mouth to comment again on his new rank, enjoying the momentary power trip–it wasn’t often you could incite this kind of reaction from your lover, when a soft ding  warned you that the elevator had reached your floor. You smothered your frown, taking a step off the elevator before stumbling over the silken hem of your gown. A strong hand gripped your elbow to steady you, another reaching around to rest firmly on your waist. Before you could attempt another step, a force abruptly pulled you backwards, your back pressing against John’s muscled torso. His warm breath caressed your neck as he dipped his head low. “Say it again,” he all but growled, his lips ghosting your neck in a way that sent heat straight to your core. You couldn’t help the slight arch of your back in response, noting with pure satisfaction the reaction you were garnering from John. You could feel his hardened arousal through the pristine dress slacks, and your cunt clenched in response. 

“Well now, love, here’s the thing,” you tease, pressing your backside against his hardened member and relishing John’s sharp intake of breath in response. “I don’t take orders from you.” You felt the rumble deep in his chest as he took the bait, his fingers all but slamming the keypad to shut the doors to the elevator. Confusion flitted across your face, but John didn’t even hesitate as he forcefully pressed the bright red stop button to halt the elevator completely.

A brief alarm sounded, followed by a robotic voice that was no doubt meant to sound soothing as it reassured passengers that the elevator had been stopped and help would be arriving soon. Understanding began to dawn as John released his hold on you, and you turned to see his familiar blue eyes peering down at you, ravenous. 

“If you don’t take orders from me,” John’s voice was low and steady, a hint of that tameless lust just under the surface. “Then please, do tell me, who do you take orders from?” He took a step closer, towering above you with a piercing glare. Reflexively, you took a step back. Well, tried to–the elevator door pressed up against you, and you weren’t  sure if it was the sudden coolness of the metal or the heat of your husband's gaze that caused the shiver that shot up your spine. 

“Well, that would be…” you  swallowed hard, wracking your brain for a name, any name. “Umm,”  you attempted to buy yourself time, but you felt as though every coherent thought you’d ever had eddied out of your mind, a ravenous need overtaking your entire body. All you could think about is John and how damned good he looked in that fucking uniform. As if reminding yourself, your eyes trailed downward, soaking in every last detail of his new dress uniform. Your gaze stopped short upon seeing the evident outline of his arousal and you instinctively bit down on your bottom lip to conceal your moan. 

John took another step to you, quickly closing the small distance between you two. You felt his firm grip on your chin, forcing your head to tilt up and meet his gaze. Passion burned in his eyes and you felt the last of your resolve melting away. Fuck being witty right now, you thought to yourself, I need this. As if he read your mind, John’s lips crashed against yours and your entire body ignited with need. Your fingers tangled in his hair and every inch of your body pressed up against him. John’s hands gracefully slid down your hips, cupping the upper back of your thighs. You took the sign for what it was, giving a little jump as he lifted you up and you wrapped your legs around his waist. He didn’t even break the kiss, just pressed your back against the doors of the  elevator, grinding his erection into your core. The friction was practically electric and you couldn’t help the moan that escaped your lips as you break the kiss. You leaned your head against the steel frame and John’s lips moved to your newly exposed neck, sucking and nipping the sensitive flesh. He took the thin strap of your gown between his teeth and  before you could so much as utter a warning, he ripped it straight from the gown. Without its integral support, the delicate satin of the bust fell down, exposing one of your breasts. 

“God damn it, John, that was expensive,” you chastised halfheartedly, your chest rapidly rising and falling as he once again ground into you. As if in apology, John peppered kisses across your exposed breast before taking your nipple into his mouth and sucking hard. Your complaints died in your throat as your body became alight with pleasure. As he continued his ministrations, he pinned you against the wall with his body, freeing one hand to gently slide your remaining strap down your arm, exposing the other breast in a manner completely opposite to its torn counterpart. John switched his attention to the other breast, gingerly taking your other nipple into his mouth. He took a moment to adjust your position against the elevator, one hand cupping your ass as the other hand slid between your bodies. For the second time that night you heard John’s sharp intake of breath as he brushed your bare self. 

“Are you really telling me you didn’t wear underwear to such a formal event?” he breathed out, barely concealing his moan at finding you bare and ready for him. “For fuck’s sake,” he breathed out, “you are so wet for me.”

You couldn’t help but let out a slight breathy laugh. “I told you I like the uniform,” you panted before your sassy remarks were replaced by cries of pleasure as two of John’s fingers plunged into your aching cunt. 

His name fell from your lips like a prayer. 

John. John. John. 

Your body was lost in the passion, his lips on your breasts, his fingers curling towards himself, hitting that spot that makes you see fucking stars. He’s relentless, devouring you–mind, body, and soul.  Before you knew it, you were on the brink of pure bliss. “John,”  you gasped, “I’m going to come,” you warned, though you knew it wasn’t necessary. Knowing your husband and all your years together, he knows exactly when you’re on the edge just as well as he knows exactly how to pleasure you to get you there. He is as in tune with your moans and sighs of pleasure as he is with his own heartbeat. 

His fingers picked up the pace, his thumb rubbing tight circles on your clit. “Come for me, my love,” John purred in your ear, and the low timbre of his voice combined with the heat of his words had you tumbling over the edge of pleasure, his name on your lips as stars crossed your vision. 

You slowly drifted back to reality as John pressed soft kisses across your chest, trailing up your neck and back to your lips. He set you down on shaky legs, supporting you with his strong grip. 

Having finally caught your breath, you took a second to take stock of the sight before you: John’s dark hair, once perfectly styled, now a mess, the ironed jacket now crumpled and partially undone, and worse of all, those brand new dress pants now clearly soaked through with a mix of  his precum and your juices. The sight had your mouth watering. You fell to your knees before the captain, hands reaching up to unfasten his belt. It fell to the floor with a satisfying clank, but you didn’t even flinch.Your tongue darted out to wet your bottom lip as you oh-so-slowly began to free John's cock. 

A low hiss escaped John’s lips as you took his bulging member into your hand. Your hand glided across the surface, eyes drinking in the veritable feast before you. No matter how many times you had been with John, his size always took you by surprise. The length, the girth, the thick vein that ran along the underside. Sliding back the uncut skin, your attention shifted to the deep red head, your thumb swiping a bead of precum from the tip. John’s gasp only encouraged you to lean forward and take the tip into your mouth, his fingers instantly tangling in your hair. Your mouth slid down his length, struggling to take as much of him in as you could. You used your hand to take whatever couldn’t fit in your mouth, and your mouth and hand worked in tandem to pleasure him. John’s quiet moans and growls of pleasure only spurred you on, and you worked to take more of him in your mouth. Only once the head of his cock hit the back of your throat did you stop, looking up at him with tears in your eyes, mascara trailing down your cheek. His loving gaze peered down at you, his lips ajar as he panted with need. 

The sight of you, on your knees before him, looking up at him from under your dark lashes, his cock resting in your mouth–it almost sent him over the edge. It took everything he had to pull himself out of your mouth. You sat on your knees, looking up at him as he closed his  eyes and took a few deep breaths to steady himself. A brief moment of uncertainty flashed across your face,  “Was it…not good for…” you trailed off, slightly confused why he stopped you. You weren’t one to brag, but you certainly hadn’t had any complaints before. Before you could even finish the sentence, John pressed a finger to your lips. “You’re perfect,” he breathed out. “I wasn’t going to last like that,” he finished, a small smile at the edge of his lips as he helped lift you to your feet. “And I’m not done with you,” he growled as his lips crashed against yours once more, but this time there was even more urgency in his kiss. He pressed your back against the elevator wall, sliding the skirt of your dress up your hips so he could lift you up again. Your legs wrapped around his waist, causing his throbbing member to brush up against your soaking wet cunt. Biting back a groan, John repositioned his hips to line up with your entrance.  With a growl, he slid home, your earlier orgasm helping his cock slide in with ease. You can feel and hear the groan deep in John’s throat as he bottoms out, the head of his cock brushing against your cervix. 

John’s forehead dipped to touch yours, his unsteady breathing matching yours. His hips froze as he waited for you to adjust. You waited a few beats, relishing the delicious stretch, before you gave a nod of approval. Supporting you with his hands, he pulled out, all the way to the tip, before slamming home. Your head fell back to the cool metal wall as you gasped in pleasure. John continued the action, hips colliding with yours, every thrust sending a wave of pleasure through you. Your moans got louder, joining in the symphony of your bodies slapping against one another, the soft beat of your body against the wall of the elevator as John railed into you. 

It was too much. Every thrust pushed you closer to the edge, and you didn’t think  you could take much  more. “Yes,” you cred out,  “Yes, Fuck me, Captain,” you pant out, extra emphasis placed on his title. John’s hips stuttered at hearing  that word on  your  lips  once more . With a growl he slammed into you even harder. “Again,” his voice so low it sent a shiver straight to your cunt. 

“Please,�� you begged, as his hips piston in and out of you with abandon, veritably nailing you to the wall with his cock. He hit that delicious spot deep within you and every thrust pulled  you closer and closer to  bliss.  “Captain,” you cried out before biting John’s shoulder as your orgasm crests, washing over you in endless waves of pleasure. You bit down harder than intended, but you don’t have time to regret it, not as John loses all semblance of control, thrusting into you with abandon. He thrust into you once, twice, and a final time as he came with a grunt of pleasure and his hips stuttered as he flooded you with his come. 

Your breaths were ragged, foreheads pressed against each other, feeling every twitch of his cock deep inside you. After a few beats, John withdrew, gently lowering you to the ground on legs that felt less than stable. He made sure to tuck himself back into his uniform and  adjust the remaining strap on your dress. You kept your grip on him, balancing yourself, as you felt his hot seed start to drip down your leg. An attempted step forward proved to be too much in your addled state, your leg threatening collapse as soon as you tried to step away from John. Without a word, John scooped you up into his arms, just like on your wedding night, before pressing a series of buttons on the elevator keypad. The elevator gave a small jolt back to life, and you found yourself thankful that John was holding onto you so tightly. Like nothing happened, John stepped off the lift and crossed you over to your suite.

You dozed in and out of consciousness in your blissed-out, post-orgasmic state, but came to as John gingerly laid you on the bed. He  helped slide you out of your dress, and you made a mental note to berate him in the morning for ruining your dress, already mapping out when he would take you shopping for its replacement. You watched in silence as John disassembled his uniform and set it out almost reverently before crawling into bed next to you. Rolling onto your side, you laid your head against his chest, listening to the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. “I am so  proud of you, Captain Price,” you murmured. His hand trailed slow,  lazy circles over  your arm and down your back, pulling you closer into him. “Everything I do is for you,” John replied, his voice barely  above a whisper. He pressed his lips to the top of  your head, “I love you.” 

#john price x reader #captain john price #john price #captain price x reader #captain John price x reader #john price x you #price x reader #captain price #john price imagine #captain john price x you

[morgana-larkin]

HMM,,, if i dare request an either chessy or melissa fic.. with... like them having a breast/lactation kink and when doing the deed- like praising reader and making them suck her tits ETC do whatever u feel is necessary with this if u even want to write it.... :) /// also inexperienced reader and/ or mommy kink....

Dare accepted! I also did a little surprise and did both of them! I don’t see Chessy as having a mommy kink though so I didn’t do that for her. So it’s quite long since I wrote about both and tried to make it as cute as possible. So good luck! Not edited in the slightest and I hope you like it!

On another note: you might have noticed that I added 2 other characters to my masterlist, adult Misty from yellowjackets and Moiraine Sedai from wheel of time. Send prompts for any character on my masterlist! I do it all, angst (with reluctance), fluff, smut, age gap.

Her Good Girl

Warnings: ok there’s a small list. Breast kink, mommy kink, praise kink, so much fluff, semi public smut, smut

Words: 6.9k (I have no regrets)

Melissa

“When are you gonna ask her out?” Barb says to Melissa one morning.

“Ask who out?” Melissa says, even though she knows exactly who Barb is talking about.

“She means y/n.” Janine pipes up and Melissa and Barb turn to the trio.

“Ya, I mean you guys are so flirty I’m surprised you aren’t already together.” Jacob says.

“It’s really obvious.” Gregory adds and Melissa turns back around and face Barb.

“What they said.” Barb says.

“I just, I’m not ready.” Melissa says. “Where is she anyway? She’s usually here by now.” Melissa adds as she sees the time.

20 minutes later they all get up to go greet their students and Melissa sees you’re still not here. They walk to their classrooms and then Melissa sees you coming in the front door in a hurry and your hair is wet.

“If you’re not gonna ask her out then at least put the heart eyes away.” Barb teases her as Melissa looks at you longingly and with soft eyes.

You end up catching up to them as you all make your way to your classrooms. “Hey you two.” You tell them.

“Hey hun.” Melissa says right away.

“Morning sweetheart.” Barb says after looking at Melissa with a smile and shake of her head.

“Running late this morning?” Melissa asks you.

“Ya, I forgot to set my alarm clock and woke up 40 minutes ago. Took the world’s fastest shower and didn’t have time to blow dry it.” You tell her. You then both say bye to Barb as you reach her class then you both continue on to yours.

“Well I think you still look good, wet hair or dry.” She tells you with a smile.

“Thanks.” You tell her. Unknown to you is where Melissa's mind is wandering right now seeing your hair wet. Things the two of you could do in the shower. Then Melissa takes a deep breath and tries to think of other things to calm herself as she feels herself getting wet between the legs and it’s not even 8am yet.

“Did you have a coffee?” She asks you and you shake your head.

“I’m gonna get a headache from the caffeine withdrawal until lunch.” You say with a pout.

“Well here, I still have half left. Take the rest of mine.” She tells you and hands you her mug.

“Oh no, that’s your coffee, you should have it. I’ll just power through until lunch.”

“Hun, I’m offering it to you. Just take it, I had enough for the morning.” She tells you.

“Are you sure?” You ask and she nods with a smile. “Alright, if you insist.” You say and you take her mug and take a sip. You hum at the taste of the caffeine and you smile.

“Do you want to go out with me?” She asks as you reach your classroom. You choke on the coffee and begin coughing. She pats and rubs your back until you stop.

“What?” You ask her, you didn’t know if you heard her right.

“Do you want to go on a date with me?” She repeats and you smile at her.

“Yes, I’d love to.” You tell her and she beams.

“How does this Saturday sound?” She asks you.

“Sounds perfect.” You tell her and kiss her cheek, she blushes and touches the spot where you kissed her cheek and smiles.

*7 weeks later*

It’s Saturday night and you’re both cuddling on her couch, finishing the movie. The credits roll and you reluctantly pull away from her and stretch and yawn.

“I should probably get going.” You say and stand up.

“Alright hun. Will I see you tomorrow?” She asks you and you nod. She gets off the couch and goes to where you’re gathering your things near the door. You stand back up and you look at her. You lean in and give her a quick peck, then you give another and another. Then you keep your lips on hers and end up making out with her. At some point you end up moaning and she pulls away. “As much as I would love to keep kissing you, your moaning is gonna make me want more.” She tells you.

You told her you were a virgin 3 weeks ago when she asked you if you wanted to have sex and she told you to let her know when you were ready. You felt so lucky to have her, she was so patient and understanding with you. You leaned in and kissed her again and she pulled back after 2 seconds before it could continue. “I’ll see you tomorrow hun.” She tells you. You were about to put your shoes on when you looked at her again, her smiling at you and you realised, you’re ready now.

“Actually, I think I’d like to stay.” You tell her and she quirks an eyebrow at you. “I’d like to stay and keep kissing you.” You tell her and walk towards her and put your hands on her stomach gently. She flinches and looks shocked and then you start moving them up, towards her chest. She stops your hands by grabbing your wrists and looks at you, still holding your wrists.

“Hun, what are you doing?” She asks you and you smile at her.

“I’m ready, and I want you right now.” You tell her and she still looks at you.

“Are you certain? Like 100% certain?” She tells you.

“Yes, I want you to be the one that takes my virginity Mel.” You tell her and she smiles.

“Then come to my bedroom.” She tells you and makes you go first. You walk upstairs and as soon as you make it to the top. She spins you around and kisses you, and then picks you up and places your legs around her waist. She carries you the rest of the way to her bedroom and she gently places you on the bed. She goes to close the door and then makes her way back to you.

You scoot up a little further on the bed and Melissa crawls on top of you and kisses your lips. She grabs the hem of your shirt and then pulls back to look at you and you nod. She takes your shirt off and she looks at you. “God you’re so beautiful.” She tells you and you bring her back to kissing you. She trails down to your neck and kisses your neck then begins sucking on it and you gasp and arch your back. Melissa sneaks her hand under you and unclips your bra. She takes it off with your help and she throws it somewhere on the ground. She switches to the other side of your neck and she cups both of your breasts in her hands and squeezes them. You moan at that and she smirks before trailing down again to your chest and places kisses all over your chest before placing her mouth around a nipple. You grab her hair when she places her mouth on a nipple as the feeling is heavenly.

“Omg Mel. That feels so good!” You tell her and she smirks, you don’t see it but you feel it. After a minute, she switches to the other nipple and you buck your hips. After another minute of her swirling her tongue around on your nipple and sucking it, she pulls away and moves down. She takes your pants off with little effort and she places her fingers on your underwear then looks at you for confirmation again. You nod your head and she slides your underwear off slowly, just enjoying seeing your whole body without anything on it, and she’s the only privileged one to ever see it, and that makes her happy. She rubs her hands up and down your legs and thighs, just feeling your entire body. She lies down to place her mouth on your clit when you speak up. “Wait.” You say and she stops immediately and looks at you. “I want to see you too. I’m completely bare here and you still have all your clothes on.” You tell her and she grins.

“I know, that’s how I like it. But don’t worry, you’ll see my body as well. After I pleasure you first.” She says with a wink and you blush. “Are you ready?” She asks you and you nod. She wastes no more time after that, she dives down to your clit and starts swirling her tongue on it and you moan out at the feeling and you grab her hair again. She then goes lower to your entrance and you gasp. “Oh Amore, you taste so good.” She tells you then sticks her tongue in your entrance and you gasp loudly. She takes her tongue out then immediately sticks it back in again and repeats for a couple minutes. She pulls back and you whine, “have you touched yourself before?” She asks you and you look at her.

“Only with a vibrator.” You tell her and her eyes shine at that.

“So you’ve never fingered yourself?” She asks and you shake your head. “Oh Amore, I feel so privileged.” She tells you and you blush. “I’m going to stick my finger in but if you want me to stop then let me know ok?” She asks and you nod. “It might hurt a bit at first but that’s because you’re not used to it.” She says and you nod again. She starts playing with your clit and you buck your hips and she lined her middle finger up with your entrance and she slowly inserts it. You gasp out when she’s entering and then when it’s in all the way, you moan. It does hurt a bit but she stays there until you nod at her to tell her the pain stopped. She slowly slides it back out then slides it right back in again and you begin to moan again.

“Can you go faster?” You tell her and she smiles and speeds up. You gasp and grab her hair. While she’s still fingering you, she leans down to you and kisses your lips. Her thumb goes to your clit and you gasp in her mouth and she slides her tongue in and you moan. She slows down and slides a second finger in and you arch your back and gasp in the kiss again. You feel you're close to coming and your legs start to shake and Melissa notices.

“Oh baby, are you close?” She asks you and you nod. “Do you want to cum for mommy?” She asks and you don’t even flinch at the nickname she gives herself, in fact it turns you on even more.

“Yes I want to cum for you mommy.” You say and she grins.

“Then cum for me baby.” She tells you and you come immediately. Melissa slows her fingers down and gently pulls them out. You take a minute to catch your breath and Melissa comes back in with a cloth. When did she leave? She gently wipes your centre then looks at you with a smile. “How was that?” She asks you.

“Fucking incredible!” You tell her and she beams. She comes up to you and cuddles you. After about 10 seconds you go and straddle her lap.

“Something you want Amore?” She tells you with a quirked eyebrow.

“I want you.” You tell her.

“You just had me.” She teases you.

“I want to see your body and touch it and make you feel good too.” You tell her.

“Are you sure? You don’t have to, the first time might be a bit overwhelming.” She tells you and strokes your cheek with the same hand she used to finger you. You grab her hand and stick the 2 fingers she used in your mouth and lick them. She looks at you with so much lust in that moment, you think she might fuck you again. You moan around her fingers and she rubs her legs together. You remove her fingers from your mouth and you reach for her shirt and she nods before you take it off. You look at her stomach and chest and you have to wipe some drool off that slipped out and she giggles. You reach in the back and unclip her bra and you practically ripped it off. Once it’s off, you freeze and stare at her breasts. They’re so big and so soft looking, they’re irresistible, they’re perfect. “Go on and touch them if you want. I like it when people touch them and suck on them. It’s a kink of mine.” She tells you and you immediately cup both of them and then attach your mouth around a nipple and she moans. “Yes baby, just like that.” She tells you and you begin sucking on it and she grabs your hair. “Yes that’s it, suck mommy’s tit.” She says and you moan which makes her buck her hips due to the vibration on her nipple.

She practically traps your head there since she’s holding your hair but you don’t care, you feel like you can spend all day just licking and sucking her nipples.

“Baby, can you be a good girl and suck mommy’s other tit?” She asks you and you immediately pull back and attach your mouth on the other one and start sucking. “Good girl.” She says and you moan. She sees that you like getting praised, she thinks you might have a praise kink. You take her pants and underwear off after you pull back and you look at her completely naked and you blush. “Does my baby like what she sees? Do you like mommy’s body?” She asks as she strokes your cheek.

“Yes mommy, I love your body.” You tell her and she smiles.

“How about you stick your cute little fingers in me and put that amazing mouth of yours back on my nipples? How does that sound?” She asks you.

“I like it.” You tell her and you go to stick your fingers in and realise you have no idea where to put them. Melissa notices this and she guides your fingers to her entrance and you stick a finger in and she moans.

“That’s it baby, put another one in, don’t be shy.” She tells you and you stick another one in and you start sliding in and out of her. You think that she feels amazing around your fingers and you don’t want to ever pull out. She then leans down so her boobs are in mouths reach and you wrap your mouth around a nipple and you start sucking. Melissa starts moaning like crazy and it turns you on and you rub your thighs together. Melissa notices the action and looks at you with a smirk. “Oh, does my baby like the noises that mommy makes for her?” She asks you and you nod. “If you like I can fuck you with a strap after.” She tells you and you nod.

You go and suck on the other nipple and Melissa continues moaning and she is now riding your fingers while you continue to slide in and out of her, matching her rhythm. She grabs your hair and she starts shaking and you look up at her face while still sucking on her nipple.

“That’s it baby, I’m so close, rub my clit.” She commands and you obey. You bring your other hand in between her legs and you find her clit and start rubbing it. Seconds after she comes with a high pitched gasp. She takes your fingers out of her and puts them in her mouth and licks them clean. She moans when she’s licking the taste of herself off your fingers while looking at you. She smirks then gets off the bed and heads to her closet.

“Wait! Where are you going?” You ask her and she turns around.

“Don’t worry, just to my closet. I made you a promise didn’t I?” She says and you look confused. Did she? You can’t remember. She then pulls out a strap and puts it on and that’s when you remember. She walks towards you with it on and you wonder how she can look breathtaking no matter what. She climbs on top of you and puts her hands all over your stomach and chest. “So beautiful, and all mine.” She says softly and you moan. “Do you like being mine baby?” She asks you and you’re back to only being able to nod as you can’t find your voice. She wants to get you more wet to not hurt you as you only ever had a finger in you before and that was 10 minutes ago. She grabbed her smallest dildo but she wants to be cautious. She then remembers that you might have a praise kink, so she experiments with that. “Well, you don’t have to worry baby, you are mine, you’re my good girl.” She tells you and you feel all the wetness from your mouth shoot to your core at her praises. She checks your entrance and sure enough, you’re wet enough now. She lines the strap up and looks at you. “This might hurt a bit baby, but if it hurts too much then tell me straight away ok?” She says and you nod.

She then starts to slide in the tip and you feel it start to fill you. She slides more in and you feel yourself stretch to accommodate it. It does start to hurt a bit but not to the point of being painful, especially if it’s also mixed with pleasure. She slides in fully and you gasp.

“You ok baby?” She asks you, voice full of concern. It takes you a few seconds but then you look at her and nod. “Do you still feel a bit of pain?” You nod at that and she stays still, she does move a bit but only to kiss you. You start to relax and then you notice the pain disappeared and only pleasure remains and you start to squirm. Melissa feels you squirm and looks at you. “Am I correct to assume you want me to start moving?” She says and you nod. She smiles at you then starts sliding in and out of you.

You start gasping and moaning as you feel it slide out then immediately fill you back up. You look at her and of course it’s a goddess that’s making you feel this and you pull her head down and kiss her. Melissa is taken by surprise by it but isn’t complaining, she likes that you get a sudden urges to kiss her, it makes her feel wanted. She smiles into the kiss while she’s sliding in and out of you, then moves a hand down to rub your clit. You gasp into the kiss at the intense pleasure you’re feeling. With her lips kissing yours, her boobs squashed on your body, her finger rubbing your clit and the dildo sliding in and out of you at a fast pace. All that together makes you come fast and strong.

She slides out of you and removes the strap. She goes to get a cloth and cleans you up. You yelp at first due to sensitivity but she makes sure to be as careful as possible and then cleans herself up. She lays down next to you and you immediately seek her body out for comfort and she doesn’t hesitate to hold her arms out and bring you close to her, with your head on her chest.

“Do you like that hon?” She asks you once your body has stopped shaking.

“Ya I did.” You tell her with a huge smile. “Did you?”

“Ya, I loved it.” She says and you yawn. “Get some sleep, I’ll be here when you wake up.” She tells you.

“You promise?” You ask her.

“I promise.” She says and you get more comfortable and immediately fall asleep, Melissa stroking your head and finally feeling like she’s where she’s meant to be. She falls asleep with a smile on her face.

Chessy

You catch Chessy's attention the first time you came over to the house. You knock on the door and Nick runs over to answer it. When you enter with him, Chessy is walking over to go get Hallie and Annie for lunch.

“Hey Chessy, I want you to meet my sister y/n.” He tells her and she gives him a look. She knew he had a younger sister but didn’t know there was such an age gap. You look to be 15 years younger.

“Hi nice to finally meet you.” She says and you look over at Nick then stick your hand out to shake hands with her.

“Hi, nice to meet you too. Nick has talked about all of you and wanted to finally meet his household.” You say. “Nick, I didn’t know you talked about me, I’m honoured.” You tell him and he chuckles.

“Forgive me for asking, but it seems like there’s a noticeable age gap between you too.” Chessy says and you both look at her and smile.

“Ya, 16 years, but we love each other regardless.” Nick says and puts a hand around your shoulders and you giggle.

“Wow, quite a difference. Anyway, lunch is ready, and Nick mentioned you’d be coming over so there’s enough for you to have some as well.” She says and you smile at her.

“Thank you so much!” You tell her and she blushes. She then scurries away quickly to go get the twins. Nick looked at the interaction with interest. He knows that Chessy is interested in both genders and he knows that you’re interested in women, a bit older women too. You mentioned your type to him before and now that he thinks about it, Chessy fits it perfectly. He decides not to say anything as he’s finally getting to reconnect with you in person again after not having seen you for a few years.

A month goes by and since you recently moved to California to get to know Nick’s family more, you lived in an apartment building about half an hour drive away. You mentioned it to Nick when he says you could drop by more instead of a few times a month. You told him that it’s a lot of gas and you got an apartment to pay for and not a great paying job. He then offered to let you move into the house, rent free and after a little insisting and Chessy telling you that it’s a great idea, you accept.

A couple months go by and you and Chessy spend a lot of time together. The twins notice it and also notices the looks you give each other and of course one of them brings it up and embarrasses both of you.

“Are you guys dating?” Hallie asks you both and Chessy’s cheeks turn red and you choke on your juice as you were taking a sip and start coughing. Chessy immediately goes and gives you a few pats and rubs your back to help with the coughs.

“Hal, why would you think we’re dating?” She asks her and the twins look at each other.

“You mean you’re not?” Annie asks and you and Chessy both shake your heads.

“But you spend a lot of time together, you keep giving each other looks that our parents give each other and you’re constantly being touchy.” Hallie explains and you both look at the twins then you look at each other.

“Ok get out of here you trouble makers.” Chessy says and shoos them away. She then turns back to you when they leave. “Hey I’m sorry abo-hm.” she starts but is cut off by your lips on hers.

And that was the start of many kisses and a relationship.

3 months pass and it’s the summertime and Chessy planned a date with you after Nick gave her time off for it, not knowing you and Chessy are dating.

Chessy brings you horseback riding, you take one horse though and she brings you a good distance away from the house. It’s about a 15-20 minute ride. She then gets off and helps you get down and then ties the horse to a tree then sets up a blanket on the ground.

“Did you take me on a picnic date?” You ask her and wrap your arms around her waist and kiss her shoulder blade.

“Ya, is that ok?” She asks, concerned you might not like it.

“Yes, I love it.” You tell her and she turns around in your arms. You both are the same height so she easily kisses your lips and wraps her arms around your neck.

“You know what I love?” She tells you and you look at her curious, you haven’t said the L word yet, but you know you both love each other.

“What?” You ask.

“You” she says and you smile.

“Well I love you too.” You tell her and she smiles and kisses you again.

You both have a great picnic date as she made both your favourite finger foods and you dive into great conversation.

At one point you feed her a piece of fruit and the juice runs down to your arm a bit and she goes and licks it up right away. You let out a small moan and you jump at her and crash your lips together.

“Woah.” Chessy says and it takes her by surprise, so while she still is able to put her hands on your hips, she still falls back on her back, with you on top of her.

When you pull back, you both stare at each other and Chessy smiles up at you. “Hi beautiful.” She tells you and you blush.

“Hi, sorry about that.” You say at bit embarrassed.

“Hey, don’t be sorry. I liked the surprise.” She tells you and moves some of your hair behind you that’s blocking your face. You look at her and you see the care she has for you and it overwhelms you and warms your heart. You knew she cares about you and you always blushed when she did things for you as you weren’t used to it from a partner.

Chessy knew your past relationships weren’t the best and didn’t last long as you told her about them. When you told her then she wanted to show you how a partner should treat you, with respect and love. She let you set the pace as she doesn’t want to push or pressure you, you told her that you came close to having sex once with a partner but then backed out as it didn’t feel right.

You kiss her again and neither of you pull back. Chessy knows she should pull back now as she’s getting turned on with your body on her like this and you’re making out with her. She doesn’t pull back and accidentally lets a moan slip out and her cheeks go red as you pull back.

“Do you want to have sex?” You ask her confused and Chessy is wondering how you don’t know how you effect her.

“Yes, I have for about 2 months.” She tells you. “But I’m letting you decide when you’re ready and I don’t want to pressure you.” She tells you honestly and you look at her with such love.

You cup her cheek and she leans into your touch. “How did I get so lucky with you?” You say and she hums.

“I feel like I’m the lucky one.” She says. You suddenly look around and you see there’s no one around and then you take your dress off. Chessy looks at you and cheeks go red as a tomato. “What are you doing?” She asks and you smile. You know she won’t do anything unless you tell her you’re ready but you decide to tease her first.

“What you don’t like what you see?” You ask her and you drop your smile, to play the act.

“What? Of course I do, but hon, I don’t think you realise the effect you have on me.” She says and she accidentally moves her hips a bit and rubs her thighs together.

“Well what if I told you I want you to touch me?” You tell her with a lower voice and lean down and scoot down a little bit and push her shirt up enough to see skin. You then lean down more and trail kisses up her stomach.

“Hon, I-”

“I want you to touch me, all. over.” You punctuate at the end and you slide your hands under her shirt and they land on her bra before she grabs your wrists and pulls them out of her shirt. You could tell she’s almost at a breaking point and you push a little further. You lean down and suck on her neck and she gasps. She lets go of your wrists and pulls your head back.

“Hon, please I-” she then freezes when you unclip your bra and take it off.

“Do you wanna touch them?” You ask her and she lets out a whine. “Go on then, I want you Chessy.” And at that she snaps. She flips you both over so she’s on top and she dives right to a nipple and starts sucking. You gasp and moan as she puts that experienced mouth on you and finds out quickly what you like. You take the blue sweater off of her and Chessy takes her top off quickly. She then goes to your neck and leaves hickeys all over your neck and chest. “You know my brother will find out as soon as we get back home” you tell her and she smirks.

“He’ll be happy to know you’re being taken cared of.” She says and rubs her hands up your body, starting at your hips. You grab her head and pull her down to kiss you and you unclip her bra and throw it somewhere. You then undo the button on her pants and pull them down. They don’t go far as you both refuse to break the kiss and you move your legs to try and pull them down. It was rather unsuccessful but it did give her a great opportunity since her legs are now right in between yours. She breaks away from the kiss with a laugh at your attempt and kicks them off. “I know you teased me to see how far you could go before I break and believe me, you’ll pay for it next time, but for now, since this is your first time, I want you to enjoy this.” She tells you and in retrospect you probably should have listened but you couldn’t with her boobs right in your face.

You sit up and immediately put a nipple in your mouth while cupping it with your hand and your other hand around her waist to help keep yourself up. You hum as you suck on it and can’t believe how many times you imagined them and how they would feel and taste, and now you know.

“Do you like them honey? Do you like sucking on them?” She asks when she heard you hum. You nod as your mouth is occupied at the moment and she grabs your head. “Suck on them all you want, baby. Your mouth feels so good on them.” She says and when you give a rather hard suck on them, her mouth hangs open, lost in the pleasure. You spend a good few minutes just enjoying her breasts, licking and sucking on them and enjoying the noises she’s making.

While Chessy is used to her breasts getting attention, she’s not used to this much, and she’s loving it. The men she’s dated as only ever paid like 30 seconds on them and when right to her pussy, the women usually about a minute before right to her pussy. And while she knows you’re both soaking wet right now, she can’t help but feel how good it is to have this much attention on them, it’s a kink she never knew she had.

“Oh my good girl, you’re just in love with sucking on them aren’t you?” She says when you pull away.

“Yes, I just love how big they are. I feel like I can suck on the whole thing.” You tell her and she stops you before you do. She’ll let you next time but for now, she wants this to move along. If you’re anywhere she is right now then you’re soaking wet in between your legs.

“Woah there, baby. You can next time but right now, I’ve been wondering how you taste.” She says and you smile.

“Can I sit on your face?” You suddenly ask as she takes your underwear off.

“What?” She asks. Your question caught her off guard, she knows she’ll accept, she wants to taste you and doesn’t matter to her who’s on their back.

“I heard about face sitting and was curious and want to try it.” You ask and she smiles.

“Of course.” She says to you and you get up while she gets on her back. You go up to her face and you align your entrance with her mouth and then lower yourself on her. The first lick she does and you both moan. She thinks you taste amazing and you think it felt really good and you both want more.

She starts licking all over your entrance and eventually sticks her tongue in and starts sliding in and out of you. You gasp and fall forward but she catches you and keeps you up by holding your waist. You end up bucking your hips and grab and yank her hair by accident as the pleasure is just so good. You feel bad for pulling her hand but she just moans and you think that either she didn’t mind or she liked it. You try again and she moaned again and realised that she likes her hair being pulled. She lifts you up a bit to speak. “You can do whatever you want to me, baby.” She says and then brings you back down on her mouth. Only this time she goes to your clit and you really start bucking your hips. You think that grabbing her hair isn’t enough so you put your hands back and grab her nipples. You squeeze them and she moans which vibrates on your clit and you let out a hitch pitch gasp as it took you by surprise and it felt good. You keep squeezing them as her moaning brings you more pleasure and before you know it, you’re close.

“Oh Chessy, I’m so close.” And she gives you a thumbs up to tell you to let go and cum. You do immediately after and Chessy licks it all up. You then get off of her and collapse next to her.

“Did that take a lot of you, baby?” She asks when she sees you spread out like a starfish and breathing hard, and you just nod. She just scoots up next to you and puts a hand over your chest. You turn to face her and kiss her lips, moaning when you taste yourself on her and that gives you a wave of energy. You take her underwear off and then go back wrapped up in her arms. While Chessy thinks you took them off to be able to feel her body on yours to calm down, you actually took them off to finger her. You bring her leg and put it over yours, then you bring a hand down in between her legs and immediately slide a finger in her entrance. She immediately bucks her hips, gasps and brings a hand to your arm, and mouth wide open. She hasn’t had anything in her in a few years and it feels so good. You add another one and slide them in and out of her slowly at first. “Baby, can you go faster?” She begs and you smile.

“I thought you said I could do whatever I want to you?” You tell her and she whines. Fuck sakes, she did say that.

“Didn’t think you’d make me regret saying it.” She jokes with you between gasps. You take pity on her as she made you feel really good and you want to do that for her. You go much faster and she hangs her mouth open again and gasps like crazy. “Oh god, yes baby, that feels so good.” She says and you risk it and add a third finger in her and she falls back on her back, overcome with pleasure. You put your other hand on her clit and rub it while you lean down and suck her nipple. She ends up leaning on her forearms with her legs spread wide open for you and she starts shaking. “Oh god, oh god baby, I’m so fucking close.” She says and you go and suck her other nipple. She comes immediately as you start sucking. You pull out of her and put your fingers in your mouth and lick them. She looks at you as you do that and as soon as you moan at the taste of her, she pounces at you and you end up on your back and her on top.

She wastes no time in kissing you and immediately sticks two fingers in you and you moan into the kiss. She curls her fingers in you while fingering you and you see stars and have to shut your eyes. She puts her thumb on your clit and rubs in a circular motion and you do a huge gasp and start shaking.

“Let go baby, it’s ok, I’ve got you.” She tells you and you immediately come. She pulls out of you then licks her fingers. She didn’t bring any cloths so the blanket will have to do, and cleans you both up. She the lays down next to you to help you both calm down with skin to skin.

“Hmm, I really enjoyed that.” You tell her and she giggles.

“Well I’m glad. Cause I really enjoyed it too.” She tells you and you smile. You end up getting dressed, packing everything up and get back on the horse after about 20 minutes of cuddling and you head back.

On the way back you get in a little teasing mood and you slip your hand under her shirt to cup her boob and rub her clit through her pants and underwear.

“What are you doing, baby?” She says and makes no attempt to stop you even though she could.

“Teasing you.” You simply say.

“Baby, if you keep at it then I’ll stop this horse and take you against the nearest tree.” She tells you. And you pull away from her clit but you put both your hands on her boobs after unclipping her bra.

“I just love these.” You say and she hums and leans back a bit, leaning into your touch. You both make it back to the house, Chessy nearly took you against a tree twice, and you end up clipping her bra back on. She brings the horse to the stable, she gets off then she helps you off. Once you land on the ground though, you wrap a leg around her waist and kiss her. She picks you up and brings you up against the stable wall and continues kissing you.

“Oh my god! Not what a brother wants to see!” You hear and you both pull back and see Nick there covering his eyes with a hand. Chessy puts you down and goes to put the horse away properly and give him something to eat.

“Sorry Nick.” You tell him and then laugh.

“Ya, sorry boss.” Chessy says and walks up behind you, wraps her arms around your waist and places her head on your shoulder.

“I had a feeling you two were together but I did not want to find out that way.” He complains and you and Chessy giggle. “Are those hickeys on your necks?” He says then looks to the horse and the fact you were gone for 3 hours. “Oh my god, on second thought don’t tell me, I don’t want to know. But Chessy, she is my little sister, so if you hurt her then I will fire you.” He tells her and points a finger at her.

“Well I guess it’s good that I have no plans to hurt her.” She says and gives your shoulder a kiss.

“And y/n, even though you’re my sister, Chessy has been with us for many years, so hurt her and you’ll have to deal with me.” He tells you and you turn to Chessy.

“Well I guess I’m stuck with you then.” You tell her with a huge smile. She responds to that with a hard kiss to your cheek and tickles your stomach and you giggle. You break out of her embrace and run away from her tickles and she runs after you, both of you laughing. Nick watches you run both away and shakes his head with a smile. “Such dorks.” He says out loud.

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[scarlethexelove]

can you please write Y/N and Wanda also Natasha is not dead here (up to you thooooo) , and Y/N pretty much replaced Vision. But before these events Natasha has always been there for Wanda, (after Endgame) so she didn’t make a hex but still griefed about Y/N and Wanda making a big move for Y/N’s reincarnation but in a good way. After Y/N being back from the dead. She learns that her soon to be wife has already fallen for Natasha and her reincarnation just meant nothing and Y/N didn’t go on with her life and ended it just there.

Wands regretted everything until she lost herself and made a big mess with the universe (pretty much MoM) and overall Wanda regretting everything, and when she gets us back (it can be Wanda taking another one of us in an another universe) or her just making us alive from the dead *this all can be up to you author*

I love your stories 🖤

I'm Sorry

Pairings: Wanda Maximoff x Reader

Word Count: 3590

Warnings: Cheating (Allusions to it but really it is there), Angst, Major character death, Mentions of Murdering innocent people, Angry Wanda, Suicide by others, Not really a happy ending, tiny bit of fluff like very little.

A/n: This one was fun. I hope I did it justice. I may have changed a little bit of it but I hope you still like it.

NO ONE IS PERMITTED TO STEAL, COPY, OR REBLOG MY WORK AS THEIR OWN

Everything hurts. You have a splitting headache and it feels like you got run over by a MACK truck. Your face scrunches up in pain, the lights too bright even with your eyes closed. Sensory overload has you curling in on yourself. Hands come up to clamp on your ears when you hear a voice, but it’s so loud and muffled that you don’t even know who is talking to you. All you want is for all of it to stop. You had been an experiment but that experience doesn’t compare to what you are feeling right now. 

“Nat turn the lights off.” Wanda orders the older woman in the room. Nat flicks the light off as she watches Wanda brush some hairs back. You let out a whimper at the contact. It breaks her heart seeing you like this. When her hand brushes against your skin she can feel you. She feels your pain. Red whisps leave her fingers slowly seeping into your skin. Soon enough the pain starts to dissipate. 

Wanda crawls in the bed behind you wrapping herself around your frame. You feel a body pressed against yours and you immediately know who it is. “Wanda.” You whisper. You turn around in her hold and nuzzle into her neck. “I’m here sweetheart.” Wanda combs her fingers through your hair. You're so tired and she feels like home. You fight to stay awake but her ministrations have your eyes closing. “It’s ok detka get some rest.” Wanda whispers and kisses the top of your head. You finally let yourself drift off to sleep. 

A little over 5 years ago the team was fighting Thanos. Your powers let you see brief points into the future. You saw that if you died that Wanda would be safe. Thanos needed you gone to get what he wants but you also saw that in the end the Avengers would win. The event that sets that in motion was your death. So as much as it pained you you let it happen. To save Wanda, to save the world. Wanda could move on but the fate of the universe was in your hands. 

“Wanda.” Nat says softly from the corner of the room. She looks at you curled into Wanda’s arms. A sight she had hoped to never see again. “Natty, she needs this.” Wanda says softly, still stroking your hair as you sleep. Nat just nods. It hurts but she knows it is something that Wanda had to do. 

Your mind races. Your dreams are of your last memories. The fight with Thanos and how you let him kill you just in order to save everyone else. Your body shoots straight up as your chest heaves from the memories. You feel a hand rubbing up and down your back but you haven’t quite gained control. You mind questioning how you are here. Why are you alive? You should be dead. That was all your mind could see and you had accepted that fact but here you are. Tears stream down your face. “Why?” You're not sure what you are asking, who you are asking the question of. You feel so small. “Why what detka?” Wanda asks you with concern on her face. “Why am I here? I should be dead.” Your voice breaks and Wanda’s heart hurts seeing you like this. 

Wanda starts explaining everything that had happened while you were gone. Excluding some details. They had worked tirelessly to bring back those that were snapped away. Wanda and Nat become the de facto leaders of the Avengers. It took 5 years but they finally did. Once that was done they set out to bring you back. It took some time but somehow when Bruce had snapped his fingers he was able to bring you back. But somehow you ended up in a pocket universe in a deep sleep. They were finally able to get you back safely. All the information flooding into your mind is a lot to handle but eventually you understand. Somehow the universe had different plans for you. 

It’s been a few months since you came back. Most things are the same but something seems off. Wanda hasn’t been as loving towards you. Before she was always so touchy and wanting nothing more than to crawl under the sheets cuddling while watching some sitcoms. But now she barely even gives you a hug. Sleeping in the same bed has you feeling like she isn’t even there. She is a million miles away even if she is only right beside you. Your heart hurts not understanding, is she still mad at you for letting Thanos kill you. Anytime you try to talk to her she just brushes you off and says nothing is wrong. So you're left alone to your thoughts and worries.

Nat had moved into your shared home while you were away. The two women grew closer at the loss of so many others. You want to be angry and jealous that Nat gets more attention than you but you still trust Wanda hoping that she will come around eventually. 

You’re walking towards the kitchen when you can hear a hushed discussion between Wanda and Nat. You stop just shy of the door frame listening in when you hear your name mentioned. “Wanda you need to tell Y/n.” Nat says her body leaning on the counter and arms crossed against her chest. “Tell her what Nat?” Wanda counters. She sits at the table with a sad look adorning her face. “You know what Wands.” Wanda lets out a sigh. “I can’t do that to her Nat.” Wanda’s voice is low. “You can’t keep lying to her. You can’t keep lying to me. I love you Wanda.” There is a pause in the conversation before Wanda speaks up. “I love you too.” Your heart drops the moment the words spill from Wanda’s mouth. 

You’re quick to turn on your heels as the tears start to stream down your face. Holding in a sob as it all makes sense now. In your absence the two had fallen in love. You’ve somehow become the other woman in Wanda’s life. You don’t know how you didn’t see this coming. Your powers should have felt this but they hadn’t and now you’re left heartbroken. You push into your shared room focusing on pulling yourself back together. You can’t let them know that you know until you figure out what to do. 

The buzzing of your phone pulls you out of your despair for the moment. You see Fury’s name flash on the screen. You quickly wipe your tears and answer the phone. “Sir.” You say masking the waver in your voice. “Y/l/n I have a mission for you. Since you have been cleared for duty I would like you to head out tonight with Barton and Barnes. I have sent over the reports for you to go over. Good luck out there and glad to have you back.” The phone line goes dead as the man hangs up the phone. You open the report sent to your phone. You now see the flashes in your mind of how the mission will go. And that is where you see it. What you’re going to do. 

That night you enter the Quinjet greeted by the two men. Hugs and joy at your return. Your powers are always a significant help to missions. You three go over the plans for the mission. You lay out what you had seen in your vision, excluding one crucial part that the men don’t need to know. You know if they did they would try and stop you. But your heart aches and you put on a fake smile so that no one would expect a thing. 

Everything was set to go. A long message meant to play for Wanda after it was already too late. This would be your last mission. Wanda and Nat would have all that they could ever want. You wouldn’t be the burden that you know you are. They should have just left you dead if they were going to do this to you. So you made that decision for them. You weren’t going to come back from this mission alive. 

The mission was going perfectly. Playing out exactly as you had seen it. Bucky and Clint were together and far away from you. You snuck into the building off the side. It held some hostages that had been taken by Hydra. You snuck in taking out every agent that you passed. It didn’t take long for you to make it to the hostages. You were able to release them from their binds and get them out of the building safely. But you knew it wasn’t over yet. Bucky and Clint were waiting exactly where you told them too. Having each hostage run towards them for safety while you stood with your back towards the open area. 

You waited knowing what was to come soon. You could change the outcome but you didn’t want to. You didn’t want to be in a world where Wanda loved someone else. You waited with bated breath as the last hostage ran towards your teammates. You exhale the air in your lungs before a sharp pain in your stomach is felt. You grit your teeth turning around firing off a few rounds, but you're hit with another round to the shoulder. You can hear the muffled sounds of Bucky and Clint calling out for you but you push through. Another shot to the leg sends you kneeling on the ground. You push through the pain as you stand. A few steps forward as you unload your mag into the man. Another man appears with his finger on the trigger of his gun. You watch as an arrow sores through the air and hits the man directly in the chest. His finger squeezes the trigger as he falls. You’re hit with the array of bullets. Your body sways before falling to your knees then falling to the ground. The ground below you stains red as your body goes cold. 

Wanda felt a change in the universe. She cries out causing Nat to panic next to her. Wanda clutches her chest in pain. She felt this twice before. Once when Pietro died, the second when you died fighting Thanos. She had never wanted to feel that pain again but here she is feeling it. The world stops turning at that moment. Not again she thinks tears streaming down her face. 

The doorbell rings but Wanda doesn’t hear it. Nat tries to console the younger woman pleading for her to tell her what is going on. It continues to ring when no one answers until Nat gets up and finds out what is going on. Wanda sits sobbing on the couch. Nat walks back in with a folded paper with your hand writing on it. Wanda scribbled on the top. 

Wanda sees this snatching the paper from her hands and quickly opening it before reading the words delicately written across the page. 

My dearest Wanda,

You’re reading this because I’m gone. I’m sorry to do this to you

but I can’t live life like this. I know that you no longer love me.

I see the way you look at Natasha and I know she is now

the love of your life. I want you to be happy. I saw this coming

and I could have changed it but who am I to keep you from the 

one you love. Don’t mourn for me, just live your life. You don’t

have to worry about me anymore and you can be happy, that 

is all I have ever wanted for you. But my love I can’t live in

a world where you love someone else. So this is goodbye.

Love,

Y/N

Tears hit the paper blurring the words in front of her. Wanda’s heart shatters into a million pieces. How could this have happened? How could she have thrown away all that you two have? She is absolutely disgusted with herself and with Nat. This isn’t how it was supposed to go but she was blinded and now her eyes are finally open but now it could be too late.

Through the tears Wanda gets up making her way out the door and immediately taking off towards the compound. Her magic lifts her into the sky as she flies as fast as she possibly can to the one place she knows you would be. Praying that maybe it was all wrong, maybe you can be saved. Nat calls out for her as she leaves her alone standing in the yard. 

The ground cracks below Wanda’s feet as she lands hard on the ground. Anger and guilt pumping through her veins as she walks towards the building. Her magic slamming doors open as she makes her way to the med bay. Your body is already lying there. Bucky and Clint talking outside the room. Windows lining the wall as they keep looking back at your body. Wondering what they would tell the angry redhead but they didn’t have to wait too long. They spot Wanda fear and sorrow on their faces. “Wanda we can -” Clint is cut off. “Save it.” 

Wanda makes her way into the room. The boys walked away looking like kicked puppies. Wanda’s breath picks up as she sees your still body encased in a black bag. The top half of it unzipped revealing your pale skin and blood staining your suit. You look so peaceful like you could be sleeping. Wanda cups your cheek, a light jerk of her hand when she feels how cold you are. She lets her magic slip out the ends of her fingers going into your head. Fresh tears streaming down her face. “I can’t feel you.” A sob wracking her body. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry love you never deserved any of this.”

Wanda silently sobs as she sits next to you. Your hand in hers as she just stares blankly at your body. The door clicks open a while later. Wanda doesn’t turn to look. “Go away.” Her voice is hoarse from all the crying but she doesn’t care. “Wands.” Nat whispers. “I said leave.” Wanda’s voice raises as her head snaps towards the door red swirling in her eyes. Nat knows she is just upset so she doesn’t back down. “Detka.” She whispers. “Don’t you dare detka me.” Wanda stands letting your hand drop off the side of the bed. “This is all your fault. She is fucking dead because of you.” Wanda seethes. “Don’t put that blame on me Wanda. You're just as much the problem.” Wanda stalks towards Nat red surrounding her body and slamming her into the window, a crack forming behind her body. “Don’t you fucking dare blame me. It should have been you. You should have died back then. I would still have her. She is more of a woman than you will ever be. I let myself be blinded by you. Blinded by the love you gave but I didn’t love you. I don’t fucking love you.” As hard as Nat can be, Wanda's words cut deep. Tears shine in her eyes as she holds back a sob. Wanda sends Nat’s body flying through walls until she lands outside. Wanda follows as she does so. Releasing Nat’s body which is now battered and bruised. She then flies off into the night. 

It’s been months since anyone has seen Wanda, held up in a small cabin in the middle of nowhere surrounded by mountains. Some have tried but they always get blasted out so they stopped trying. She has been lost to the Avengers and they aren’t sure they could ever get her back. The day they lost you they also lost her. 

Wanda’s black tipped fingers comb through a book. A very dangerous book. The more she searches the darkness in her soul grows and the blacked tips grow. She has tried everything in the book to bring you back to life but none of it works. She had another attempt today, something new, something hopeful but it ends with a magical outburst throwing everything in the cabin. She continues to comb through the pages ignoring the disarray around her. She closes her eyes and lets her magic do the work. It’s not long before she finds something new. She thought she had seen all that this book had to offer. All that the Darkhold had to offer to the Scarlet Witch. 

You are sitting in your living room, two small boys cuddled into each of your sides as you watch a movie. Empty bowls of ice cream sitting on the coffee table that you have your feet propped up on. You laugh as your son Tommy tries to mimic you. You other son Billy giggling along. Tommy huffs and crosses his arms. “Not funny.” He mumbles. You can’t help but ruffle his hair which makes him swat at your hand causing you to chuckle. “One day buddy you will reach it.” You kiss the top of his head. All of you falling back into the silence, the only sound is the movie playing. 

Your mind flashes to a vision of Wanda but not your Wanda standing in the middle of your living room. Her face twisted into something you can’t even imagine in your wildest dreams from the woman you loved. The pain that she has caused to get to this point. As your world comes back to you you are met with a star shaped portal in the middle of your living room. What was once an image in your head now in front of you. 

Wanda’s hand wraps around the young girl's throat in front of you. “What did you do?” She seethes. The two boys next to you are terrified. You quickly stand and tell them to run but Wanda’s head snaps towards you. The couch you were once on is now thrown at the stairs blocking the way. You push your boys behind you in a protective manner. Wanda’s eyes trailing the boys curiously, a small warm spot forming in her heart seeing your protective nature. She didn’t expect to find you with kids but she always wanted a family with you so it can’t hurt. 

“Wanda!” You yell at her. Wanda is startled by the anger in your voice. You have never yelled at her like that. “Let the girl go.” You demand of her. Her hand slips from the girl's neck as she coughs on the ground holding her throat. Wanda starts stalking towards you but you back up with your boys behind you. 

Billy tugs on your shirt a little trying to get your attention and you quickly look back at him. “Is that Mama?” His voice sounds so small. Your attention quickly turns back to the woman in front of you who has stopped. You can see tears in her eyes at Billy’s words. “That is not your Mama.” You shake your head. You can see the hurt on Wanda’s face as she gets closer to you. “I can be.” She says a crack in her voice. 

You start to walk towards the woman but your boys try to stop you. You motion that you will be ok as you stand in front of Wanda. “You could never be my Wanda.” She falls to her knees, her hand on her chest as she looks up at you. “I can see your hurt and your pain but you have caused so much more and for what.” Tears rolled down her cheeks. “I did it for you.” She whispers. “I would never want you to do this for me. Wanda you murdered people. Good people.” Wanda stands back up and moves towards you, her hand reaching out to cup your cheek. You back up away from her touch. “I wanted you back.” You scoff and shake your head. “After seeing what you did I could never want you. I miss my Wanda but you are not her and could never be.” 

Wanda’s face twists in anger. You try to back up again but she is quicker this time. She grabs your wrist in her hands. “Wanda that hurts.” You whimper as she digs her nails in. “Too bad. I’ll make you love me just you see. Now that I have you back I will never let you go again.” There is a panic that rises in you. “We will have the perfect little family.” She looks behind you. “Won’t we boys?” They are too scared to say or do anything just holding onto each other for comfort. 

Wanda keeps one hand on you as she turns around. Her wrist flicking as America is thrown back through the portal. It dissipates from the middle of the room before she turns back to you. You struggle to get free but she is stronger than you remember. She clicks her tongue and looks at you, her hand finally reaching to cup your cheek. Red whisps leave her fingers as they sink into your mind. “All mine now.” She replaces every memory and thought of your Wanda with her. Changes the fear to love. You’re hers now and no one will change that. Her magic soon flowed into the boys having the perfect little family. She would tear the world in two to keep you and the boys forever. 

#syd answers #wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff #wanda x reader #wanda fanfic #wanda marvel #wanda #wanda x you #wanda x y/n #wanda maximoff fanfiction #wanda maximoff fic #scarlet witch #wanda maximoff angst #wanda maximoff x fem!reader #wanda maximoff x you #wanda maximoff x reader angst

[honeywiththemoneyloa222]

WHO AM I??

Hi baby

I’m going to talk a little bit about myself

I don’t wanna reveal too much

My face and everything else will remain anonymous for safety and privacy💕

Name:

My name is Honey(yes this is my birth name lol)

You can call me by my name or honeybee

Or even honeycomb

Do NOT call me beehive 😡

Unless it’s related to Beyoncè💕

Age: 23

Topics:

I discuss the void state, Law of assumption,Reality Shifting (I haven’t talked about this yet but will if you need more info)

And All kinds of Manifestation methods

How to talk to Honey!!!

Just dm me any questions I don’t take asks anymore so if you have any questions just feel free to dm me

Ethnicity/Nationality

My mom is Afro Peruvian, Indian,and Haitian

My dad is Jamaican

Sooo

I’m black hehe🤟🏾

I don’t do these I’m super private it’s soooo weird omg

What do I like??

Music food animals

Did I say music because

MUSIC!!!!!!

My favorite artists

I love all kinds of music

Even death metal occasionally

I like Harry Styles,Kid Cudi,Lady Gaga The Beatles,Ice Spice and many moreeeee

I also love movies

Literally almost any kind

But anyways

Let’s talk about something more interesting!!

Now that you know me(kind of)

I want you to know about this technique I discovered

It’s not new at all

In fact ppl on here have already talked about it I’m just late

As usual 😔

Anywayyyyyy

There’s a technique I want you all to try

It’s called the

“Wim hof breathing”

Method

No methods are needed But if you really want one

Then here you go pookie

(Found this on a website but it won’t let me copy the link😔)

WIM HOF BREATHING METHOD

Find a comfortable position.

Breathe in deeply through the nose or mouth and through the belly to the chest. Then let the breath go unforced.

Exhale through the mouth, then immediately breathe in again.

Take 30–40 such breaths in short bursts.

Take one final, deep inhalation then let the air out and stop inhaling. Hold the breath until you feel the urge to breathe again.

Inhale very deeply to full capacity and hold for 15 seconds, then let it go. This completes the first round.

Repeat the whole process, steps #2-6, 3-4 times.

After completion take time to meditate and enjoy the state of deep relaxation

After the very last step you should be a deep trance like state you should be really relaxed

I recommend that you let your next subliminal play

Which should be

Either a theta or epilson wave track or pink noise

Make sure your desired subliminal that plays after is Not a guided meditation you wanna still be in a trance

Start affirming in that point

And don’t stop

Just feel how relaxed you are feel that powerless body but powerful mind

Your body is at ease your soul and mind collide in such ways that allows you to breathe freely without any stress no harm

In the void state

Your main goal should be getting peace

Because if you’re entering just affirm

You’ll likely put it on a pedestal you’ll get frustrated and give up

It is not a wish granter bitch

It’s you

Baby you are powerful

Baby you are pretty

Baby you can tap in the void

And make the bring the 4D to your 3D and make it your home

Don’t use the void as a wish granter

Use it for peace

Don’t treat the 3D like the enemy

Treat it like a friend

After all it exists the way it does because of your assumptions

Whether you say this is hard or this is easy

Sugar, you’re right either way

Because if you assume something then that’s how it’ll be

If you think you’re pretty you’re pretty

But if you think you’re broke

Then you’re broke

If you think you’re rich

Then you’re rich baby

You could have wings

Superpowers

Be the biggest singer or rapper in the world

Star in the next Dune Movie

Be best friends with Ariana Grande

Be a Scientist

Be smarter than Albert Einstein(I mean was he actually super intelligent if he lacked common sense)

You could be get a bigger butt!!

I mean didn’t necessarily have a pancake ass

But I definitely didn’t have a Nicki Minaj

BUT I DO NOW!!!!

And bestie you can too!

Plastic surgery who???

Do we look like a Kardashian-Jenner?? I think the f not🙄

The void is our plastic surgeon

You wanna a smaller nose?

Got it

Tig ole biddies?

Got it

Nicki Minaj butt?

Got it

Floor length hair?

Got it?

Whatever you want to change about yourself

Got it!

And for the last time babies

You ALWAYS ENTER THE VOID EVERYTIME YOU SLEEP

Mentally just be

Physically sleep

In that moment baby

Forget the 3D and its fuck ass bob

Because the 3Ds not your enemy but its your puppet

You’re a ventriloquist CONTROL THAT MF

The 4D is you

The void is you

Quit saying what you can’t do babe

You CAN BECAUSE YOU ALREADY DID AND YOU STILL DO

“HoNEy I StiLL didNT gET inTO tHe vOiD”

YES YOU DID!!!!!!

You did it

You just didn’t know

Bro the void is just recognizing you’re asleep

And getting in contact with your mind

Which is where you already go when you go to sleep

So ha

Billie

There’s your answer

When we fall asleep

That’s where we go

The mf Void State

The only thing your cute ass has to do baby

Is just be aware

When Neville Goddard says just “BE”

Bitch just BE

That’s it

Be aware

Like that SpongeBob episode

“Be the crane”

Be the Void

It’s just you love

So why you stressing

Why complicate something YOU created?!

Baby girl make it make sense

Own your power bitch

I love you My darlings

Month is almost over

Bring me my success stories

Or I’ll be your sleep paralysis demon 😈

(Just kidding)

Or am I;)

NOW BITCH LOOK!!!!

YAYYYY

Imma keep pressuring you to listen to this(NOTE YOU DO NOT NEED SUBLIMINALS)

But I like this one🫠

Wrong emoji

I can’t find that cute one at the moment I’m rushing cuz I wanna eat my burger!

SLADE:

https://youtu.be/oKU8YIicYQg?feature=shared

THIS

because it’s soooo peaceful

Slade is the best

BYE BITCH GO GET THAT DREAM LIFE NOW!!!

I love you ⭐️💕

#law of assumption #law of attraction #void state #void #law of manifestation #manifesting #manifesation #subliminals #loassblog #loassumption #reality shift #desired reality #reality shifting #dream life #desired life #loablr #loa success #loa blog #loa tumblr #law of the universe #manifesting affirm and persist #robotically affirming #affirm and persist #affirmation #meditating #guided meditation #meditation #void success #Youtube

[glossamerfaerie]

One aspect of Gwynriel that really excites me is religion. The other protagonists don’t seem to take religion or rituals very seriously? Everyone respects the Mother and acknowledges her power (and the Cauldron), but we haven’t explored faith among the fae. Feyre has a terrible experience with Ianthe (a sadly accurate depiction of corruption within organized religion). But we know that not all priestesses are like power-hungry Ianthe. Nesta is understandably indifferent even though she later has an experience with the Mother during Nyx’s birth. Rhys and Cassian seem respectful but we’ve never seen them pray or attend services. It’s giving “only attending church during Christmas” level of religious commitment.

Azriel, on the other hand… we haven’t had much canon insight in his head, but I firmly believe that Azriel is more religious than his brothers. Like he’s not the type to attend temple services, but he probably thinks about faith and the Mother regularly. Clearly he has contemplated mating bonds and who creates them — maybe he’s prayed for a mating bond? Maybe his mother raised him to be more religious. In HOFAS, after Nesta takes the mask off in a close call, Az’s very first instinct is to thank the Mother. Possibly that is meaningless (like how an atheist can say “thank god”) but idk. Az seems to have more faith than his brothers.

“The Mask fell from Nesta’s face, clattering on the stone.

Nesta swayed, but Azriel was there, catching her, bringing her to his chest, scarred hands stroking her hair. “Thank the Mother,” he breathed. “Thank the Mother.”

A few chapters later, Az describes the Cauldron and what happens after death.

“Bryce nodded to the carving. “What’s the big deal about a cauldron?”

“The Cauldron,” Azriel amended. Bryce shook her head, not understanding. “You don’t have stories of it in your world? The Fae didn’t bring that tradition with them?”

Bryce surveyed the giant cauldron. “No. We have five gods, but no cauldron. What does it do?”

“All life came and comes from it,” Azriel said with something like reverence. “The Mother poured it into this world, and from it, life blossomed.”

Later in the conversation, Az explains what happens to souls after death.

“When you die, where do your souls go?” Did they even believe in the concept of a soul? Maybe she should have led with that.

But Azriel said softly, “They return to the Mother, where they rest in joy within her heart until she finds another purpose for us. Another life or world to live in.”

The way Az talks about the Mother, with reverence and confidence, makes me certain that he’s more religious than his brothers.

Then, of course, we have Gwyn — a literal priestess who was raised in a temple. She still attends daily services and sings for the choir. I’ve wondered if what happened in Sangravah shook Gwyn’s faith. Maybe she thinks the Mother exists but isn’t a benevolent deity. Maybe she’s bitter that the Mother didn’t save her servants from Hybern attacks. She definitely feels shame and unworthiness — Gwyn no longer feels like she has a right to wear the Invoking Stone. Working through those feelings will be a major aspect of Gwyn’s arc.

“You asked me once why I don’t wear the hood or the Invoking Stone. That stone is a sign of holiness. How can someone like me wear it?”

Within the temple, Gwyn also faces prejudice and discrimination from her fellow sisters. Ianthe isn’t the only asshole within the organization (cough Merrill cough). I’m sure that some people in Sangravah were cruel to Gwyn’s family because of their nymph heritage. I don’t know what SJM has planned, but I feel that religion will play a major role in the Gwynriel book. I wouldn’t be surprised that, like Nesta, Gwyn has a firsthand experience with the Mother. She will definitely use the blue invoking stone for healing (a nice parallel to Az’s blue siphons).

“It’s an Invoking Stone.” Gwyn unfurled her fingers, revealing the gem within her hand. “Similar to the Siphons of the Illyrians, except that the power of the Mother flows through it. We cannot use it for harm, only healing and protection. It was shielding us.”

I’m also curious to see Gwyn and Az discuss their religious beliefs together. Maybe Az gets permission to join the dawn and dusk services. The man barely sleeps, he might as well watch Gwyn during her religious commitments. The shadows are NOT going to pass a chance to hear their girl sing (or watch her glow). Maybe Nesta can talk Az into singing with the choir. 🥹

Nesta could only gape at the lovely melody, the voices from the front of the cavern leading it, lifting higher than the others. Gwyn sang, chin high, a faint glow seeming to radiate from her. The music was pure, ancient, by turns whispering and bold, one moment like a tendril of mist, the next like a gilded ray of light. It finished, and Merrill spoke about the Mother and the Cauldron and the land and sun and water. She spoke of blessings and dreams and hope. Of mercy and love and growth.

Idk, maybe I’m wrong about Az being religious. But it feels like such a wasted opportunity if we don’t learn more about the Mother! At the very least, I do see Az attending the dawn and dusk services if he’s not on a mission. 🎼🩵🎶

#gwynriel #my acotar thoughts #pro gwyn #gwyneth berdara #azriel #gwyn x azriel #nesta archeron #hofas spoilers #house of flame and shadow #acotar #a court of silver flames

[bicheetopuff]

(Ch. 336)

You know, this panel has always made me a little curious. Every other time we saw Izuku sparring with Katsuki (before the war started at least), he’d use blackwhip to defend himself, hence ‘catch-a-kacchan’ so I found it weird how Izuku didn’t even try to grab Katsuki. For like 100 chapters prior to this, he used blackwhip for everything and would eventually just leave it out incase he needed it quickly kinda like how Hawks utilized his feathers (when he had them) so I kinda just made a mental note about how weird it was that Izuku chose to evade instead of defend when he easily could’ve.

I also found it weird how quickly Izuku wanted to change the topic along with the distress on his face. I thought it was just a cheap and ooc way of explaining Todoroki’s new power quickly but, since it’s now confirmed that Izuku has PTSD about Katsuki’s sacrifice, what if Katsuki’s cluster move triggers that trauma response too?

The next time we see cluster used with Izuku present, Izuku actually does respond with blackwhip.

(Ch. 404)

He doesn’t use it in defense though, he uses it in almost possessive way by securing their hands together with it. But also, he doesn’t speak for this entire chapter. It could be explained away by the side effect of using gearshift and him not being able to breath but before now, he’s been more focused while in distress and was also speaking just fine before. Though, in these panels, and through the entire chapter, he seems almost delirious and in shock. He’s not even reacting to the lack of oxygen anymore.

He even starts ignoring Shigaraki in these moments. He’s stunned and mesmerized but now I’m starting to question whether he’s amazed or scared out of his mind for what might happen. With that uncertainty, all that I can say confidently is that he’s distracted.

(Season 7 ep. 4)

Arguably after chapter 404, he stops thinking straight and, honestly, gets a little sloppy. A few chapters after this, is when gets danger sense stolen and starts getting truly injured. He makes the decision to give away OFA and loses his arms. He reverts right back into his “I don’t care what happens to me” mentality that his class has been trying to get him to grow out of for a while.

He wasn’t mentally prepared for something to go wrong in this fight. He wasn’t mentally prepared to be pulled away, leaving Katsuki with Shigaraki. I thought it was just iffy writing that he’d mentally regress after Katsuki woke up instead of before but, it honestly makes a lot more sense now. He cared about what happened to himself because he needed to stay alive to ensure Katsuki’s revival. Once Katsuki woke up and he watched him fight AFO, he started being reckless again. He went back to viewing himself as nothing but a vessel for OFA because he believes OFA is the only thing that can beat AFO, hence why he trusted the vestiges when they said “we can fight him from the inside” (which I think was a silly decision. It’s noble in theory but it amounted to nothing because Izuku can’t win in this regressive state of self sacrifice anymore. Or at least, he shouldn’t since it’s such a big part of his arc.).

And now, with the most recent chapter with most of his classmates present it seems like he’s regretting that decision because he’s being reminded that people care about him. They showed up to support him regardless of already being hurt because he can’t win on his own. Eri mutilated herself to help him and if that doesn’t tell him that fighting without the intent of not dying is stupid, idk what will.

(Ch. 421)

He was about to just throw himself back into the fight with the same mindset as before if Aizawa didn’t stop him. He looks frustrated because he realizes the weight of what he’s been doing and how looking up to AM and the previous vestiges shouldn’t be his role models right now considering all of their fates. He’d just be continuing OFAs curse like Katsuki’s been worried about for a hundred something chapters.

In conclusion, this post was very unfocused but I can’t wait to see Izuku kick ass and for Katsuki to show back up because with the impact he’s had on Izuku, I DESPERATELY need them to talk. Most of this post may have very well been a stretch but, let me be delusional please.

#bnha #bakugou katsuki #midoriya izuku #boku no hero academia #bnha spoilers #bnha 421 #also rereading some of these chapters made me realize that katsuki changed fate just like Izuku did when Nighteye looked into the future #I think we’re all being far too normal about that #oh Katsuki’s gonna show back up btw #he literally has to for what’s happening to make sense #same with iida and Uraraka #bakudeku #bkdk #I’m sorry but this last memories episode chemically altered my brain and made think of Izuku’s character so much #he’s just a kid #bnha meta

[plumeriacosmos]

WAIT i also want a polin au where the featherington sisters have a close relationship, maybe because they all understand what it means to be all daughters of a less than popular barony. With a neglectful dad and a mom putting pressure on all of them, they turn to each other to confide their worries and stuff. It’s just an overall sweet relationship. They don’t show affection in public, since their Mama tells them it was unbecoming to show affection in public. Portia loves her daughters very much, she just has some issues regarding showing affection.

They all probably figured out that Pen is LW, with their relationship being so close, it was easy to figure out who LW is. They didn’t confront or stop her, mostly because they saw how much pride and fun Pen is having with it.

Prudence and Philippa, as the two oldest, dotes on and are protective of Pen (Felicity too if we wanted), because they understand that Pen loves deeply. They can see it through her actions, her kindness and her people pleasing (i.e. her relationship with Eloise). That’s why they’re so concerned when they noticed how much Pen adores Colin, and subtly discourage her from holding those feelings. They know the Bridgertons are bad news to them. They all might be part of the Ton, but they’re different compared to their families.

Prudence always watches Pen and Colin like a hawk, which is kind of why she’s not really married yet. She wants to make sure that Colin doesn’t do any funny business to Pen. So when Pen confesses about what she heard Colin say at their ball and (and also confesses about Eloise and the LW business), Prudence was livid. Was about to march into Bridgerton house and everything. But Philippa, the voice of reason, points out that they don’t have any power compared to the Bridgertons. So Prudence doesn’t and instead starts scheming on how to best protect their little sister.

They also say little lies to Portia, just so Pen can finally wear what she likes. Portia finally gives their opinions some value, since they’re married women at this point. They know Pen hates her clothes, and finally not being under their mother’s thumb, they can finally help Pen in some way.

Anyway, the next season, Pru and Pip finally decides to show just how close they are. Finally married (and recruiting their husbands into being protective of Pen), they do everything they can to run interference whenever Pen is about to have some time with Eloise and Colin.

What they don’t realize, is that Pen is also greatly adored by the Bridgertons, and so clearly wished and expected Pen to join them soon (once Colin pulls his head out of ass LMAO) so they also try to interfere when Pru and Pip tries to take Pen out of talking with Colin.

Honestly, i just want a Prudence and Anthony stand off as both the eldest Featherington sibling and the eldest Bridgerton sibling. I think it would be funny.

#sunnie thoughts #bridgerton #polin #polin bridgerton #bridgerton tv #penelope featherington #colin bridgerton #polin au #i actually like the thought of all featherington sisters as close #like maybe in one universe #they have a close bond as the bennet sisters #i think pru and pip will be like jane and lizzy in this au #scheming and planning to protect their precious penny #oooh #its penny vs pen #the nickname wars #penny for the featheringtons #pen for the bridgertons #pen is probably oblivious to what pru and pip are doing lol #she trusts her sisters #el and colin arent tho #they noticed the way prudence glares at them #or when philippa stares at them in disdain #and theyre ngl theyre kinda intimidated #they all thought pru and pip are kinda dumb and airheads #but what they dont know is that the two are not so dumb when it comes to their sister’s feelings #i just want protective featherington sisters play #😔

[heycasper22]

Acotar long theory - Rhysand & Gwynriel.

Spoilers all SJM books

Rhys Knows about about the mating bond between Gwyn and Azriel.

This is a theory that I can really get behind anyway and here's why. 

Staring out with SJM retconning the events surrounding the raid on the temple in Sangravah. In ACOMAF Rhys states he had to wait for confirmation from Azriel that Sangravah had been raided, Mor also appears to be shocked by this news so we can take for granted that Azriel was either there or obtained the info to pass on to Rhys.

In ACOSF however SJM changed this to Azriel definitely being there, first and slaughtering all the Hybern soldiers, then Mor a few minutes later and then Rhys arriving in person. 

This is actually the part of the recton that I find the most interesting. That Rhys himself turned up. Sarah could have retconned it so Azriel then Mor and Cassian winnowing in together with less tampering with what she originally said. Rhys often delagates tasks/missions to others.

Having Rhys present leads me to believe that there would be some purpose in his being there, Mor I think could be accounted for as a female presence to help the priestesses. Gwyn even specifies what the characters do, Azriel kills, Mor heals but not what Rhys did. 

So what purpose could Rhys have had in that scene?

Was he put there just so that he was already introduced to Gwyn and could snipe at Nesta when he sees them together in the training ring? He already knows why all the Priestess are at the HoW library, he could have sniped at Nesta wether or not he knew her personally or not. 

For this I'd like to look at some examples of Rhys talking about his own power, the particular way he describes what he was doing with his power while UTM

"I made a web between all of them, actively controlling their minds every second of every day, every decade, to forget about Velaris, to forget about Mor, and Amren, and Cassian, and Azriel." - ACOMAF

"anyone flying or traveling near Velaris would see nothing but barren rock, and if they tried to walk through it, they’d find themselves suddenly deciding otherwise." - ACOMAF

“Amarantha didn’t know they existed. And when someone tried to tell her, they usually found themselves without the mind to do so.” - ACOMAF

We know that it is in Rhys' wheelhouse to make people forget and importantly to make people switch tack when their mind strays towards a subject he wishes to remain a secret. Imagine you wish to tell someone something but suddenly all it slips away and now you're just wondering if you left your oven on. 

So if you will, go on this journey with me, and we say for instance, a mating bond snapped into place for Azriel and Gwyn upon their first meeting, how truly, truly terrified might she have been in that moment. After everything she'd just been through.  

Gwyn says that Azriel "slaughtered them all" 

Could his rage have been something to behold even for Rhys to know what it was? As Ruhn can tell when Hunt goes into a Mates rage in HOSAB?

Could Rhysand have snatched Azriel's mind in that moment, and made him forget? Just tied a little knot in his mind and held onto it all this time?

I suppose a good question is would Rhysand do that, because we know that he could. 

In ACOWAR there's a scene that's brought up frequently in regards to ships and has been gone over quite thoroughly but I'd like to go over some bits and pieces that interest me for this theory however.

The conversation Rhys and Feyre have before leaving for the Hewn City chapter 24.

Feyre feels guilty for entering Lucien's mind without consent, albeit she did this because of her deep concern for Elain. 

'Would you have done it? '

'Rhys considered. Yes. And I would have felt just as guilty afterward.'

Rhys confirms he would go into a friend's mind, and that he would feel guilty for doing so.

He then goes onto assuage Feyre's guilt, determining that she had a good reason to do what she did.  A 'for the greater good' sort of reasoning. 

We see this reasoning resurface in Rhysand in ACOSF where he makes a poor choice in hiding the real risk of Feyre's pregnancy to her. He didnt wish to upset her, and wanted a solution to hand before he informed her. This isn't necessarily about the really poor choice he made more that he believed he had sufficient reasoning. 

To go back to ACOWAR ch24:

Feyre asks if Rhys thinks Lucien and Elain are well suited, he doesn't really give and answer except to say that Lucien is loyal and fiercely so, and then we get this interesting choice of words:

“So is Azriel.”

“Azriel,” Rhys said, “has been preoccupied with the same female for the past five hundred years.”

Not in love with Mor, but preoccupied, distracted by. 

Then immediately afterwards Rhys, who never really tells Feyre what to do, basically asks her not to get involved in Azriel and Mor's business. As though he really takes no issue with his brother being 'preoccupied' with Mor. 

Rhys also does not offer any comment about Feyre's thoughts on Azriel and Elain as a couple. 

As for Azriel's ACOSF bonus chapter, a lot of people where mad at Rhys, either for him interrupting an Elain/Az kiss and meddling in their business or just for the simple fact he seemed to be 'throwing his weight around' a little bit. 

Rhys' surface level explanation of this as a Ruler makes sense, but let's look at a potential different angle. 

"What if the Cauldron was wrong?"

Rhysand blinked. "What of Mor, Az?"

Azriel questions the Cauldron and the first thing Rhys does is to bring up someone he knows Az is preoccupied with, a 500 year distraction to keep him chasing his tail. 

"The Cauldron chose three sisters. Tell me how it's possible that my two brothers are with two of those sisters, yet the third was given to another"

Rhys' face drained of color. 

Rhysand does not pale easily. From my checking, that descriptor for him seems to be reserved for if something really upsets him or freaks him out (like Feyre talking about her death)

So for him to drain of colour, that sentence has to have really really bothered him, guilt perhaps at something he has done? 

We know a mate bond can never truly be broken or go away, but for the males it can "drive them mad" 

Could this be concern over Azriel's mental state not just because of the rash decision to kiss Elain where anyone including Lucien could see, but for what Rhys thinks might happen to a mated male when he does not remember that he is mated or who to?

"You believe you deserve to be her mate?"

This could be Rhys looking for that reasoning, has he done the right thing or made a huge mistake. 

"Allow me to make one thing very clear. You are to stay away from her." 

This seems pretty extreme, unless however you alone understand how truly messy things could become, aside from all the explanation he gives about Lucien, including the blood duel (Which is odd for Rhys to mention as he knows Lucien is Helion's son) 

Gwyn is Nesta's friend. Azriel is already physically spending time in Gwyn's presence, perhaps Rhysand is hoping he'll be able let go soon. How mad you might be at your brother being so close to everything he ever wanted and him fucking it up, even if it you had a part to play in it. You would put your foot down. Hard. 

"So you will leave Elain alone. If you need to fuck someone, go to a pleasure hall and pay for it, but stay away from her."

Where is the: 'Hey brother I know how you must be feeling but dont worry, there must be a special someone out there who loves and deserves you, get out there and look!' ?

The options he confronts Azriel with are, hey what about the girl we all know you're never going to get with or failing that, pay for a sex worker? Seems like Rhys might actually be limiting Azriel to people he believes he won't form an serious relationship with doesn't it?

"Snarl all you want."

"But if I see you panting after her again, I'll make you regret it."

This actually stuns Azriel out of being angry, Rhys doesn't do this sort of thing normally. 

So if you add this up with Rhys saying Elain would have the full support of the Night Court should she wish to reject her mating bond, why would Azriel have to stay away from Elain forever? If that's what she wanted and he wanted. 

Something so out of character for Rhys it shocks Azriel, just to set up a forbidden love trope? 

As mentioned some were pissed at Rhys for all this.

But SJM likes to do this to us, she likes for us to BE ANGRY at characters, and then give us an explanation that breaks our heart or at the least helps us understand later down the line. (If I factor in my long Elain theory we might even be thanking him for interrupting!)

Because Rhys would have done this for Gwyn, not for Az, but to protect her, to try and offer her some peace while she heals.

If this theory where true, I'd like to imagine that he had a conversation with her and let her know that full stop that Az wouldn't try and pursue her unless she was ready wether that be 2 years, a decade or never. 

But again what we have seen is Rhys being down right horrible sometimes, if he believes it's for the greater good, then we usually get the actual explanation for it later. 

Further on in the BC Azriel obviously interacts with Gwyn. 

"For a heartbeat their gazes met. He blocked out the bloody memory that flashed, so at odds with the Gwyn he saw before him now" 

Did he block it out? 

Or did he just get too close to remembering everything.

Did Rhys yank on that leash?

"I just. . . I know you like to be alone." 

Gwyn most definitely could have perceived that about Azriel, but in theory she also could have asked someone who knows him to tell her about him. 

'Azriel dipped his head in a sketch of a bow. something restless settling in him. Even his shadows had calmed. As if content to lounge on his shoulders and watch.

But--- sleep. He needed to at least attempt to get some.'

'He wouldn't go so far as to call Gwyn a friend, but...'

These buts... These sort of... interrupted thoughts, paired with sense that Azriel isn't entirely sure why he's doing some things. It does give the sense of other forces at play.

I know some people like to go in for the Gwyn is lightsinger theory, personally I don't (I address this in my long Elain theory) Especially with the points at where these thoughts are cut off. 

I know some also like the 'fake bond' theory like Aelin/Rowan/Lyria. Maeve of course having similar powers to Rhys, I'd find it much more likely however that Rhys would use his power to 'hide' a bond for good, than to fake one, for evil. Or even to fake one full stop. 

Mating bonds are powerful things though as we see in ToG even with an altered mind Rowan is still attracted to and still falls in love with his actual Mate.

Does Rhys really have the power totally control everything about Azriel's bond to Gwyn now that he's actually interacting with her? Perhaps they'll fall in love before Gwyn and Rhys fess up to having known all along.

One would think though that Rhys trying to keep a hold on such a powerful and primal force might affect Azriel though...you would expect to see something more than interrupted thoughts, something more physical like oh, I don't know...

Headaches? 😉

Again this is just a theory, theories are fun and we all like to rummage through the text and try and figure stuff out through this long wait. I can't believe it ended up being this long even though I really tired to stick to the topic at hand! Plausible or not plausible? If you got this far, thanks

#gwynriel #pro gwynriel #acotar theory #anti elriel #anti e/riel

[fanficshiddles]

The Redbridge Hunts, Chapter 51

‘I did it because having you alive and hating me, is better than not having you alive at all.’

Claire’s heart broke at hearing Chris’ words. Judging by the look on Loki’s face, she had a feeling that his heart did too…

Loki said nothing at first, his mouth was open in shock at Chris’ admission.

‘You… you knew I didn’t want to be turned.’ Loki said gruffly.

‘You were dying in my arms, Loki. I loved you, so much. More than anyone else. When I first held you as a baby, I knew I’d do anything for my little brother. I was not about to just let you die.’ Chris yelled at Loki and turned away, his back to them.

Loki looked down, Claire saw the pained expression on his face.

‘If you just stopped killing innocent people, like dad did. You terrified me that day.’ Loki said quietly.

Chris turned around. ‘It’s not that easy. I’m addicted to the feeling I get when my victims are scared, the rush of power and the taste of their blood, it’s fresher and rich, I can’t help it. You’ve never been able to accept it, but I don’t care.’ Chris growled low.

Loki pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. ‘I get it, Claire’s blood is the most delicious thing in the world, but I can control myself. I can stop without killing her. You could too, you don’t need to kill them after!’

‘I don’t care about them. Their lives are just fleeting in comparison to us, it will happen sooner or later. Whether I’m here or not. Vampires will overtake.’

‘Would you say that if your soulmate turns out to be human?’ Claire asked.

Chris glared at her. ‘I don’t have a soulmate.’

‘You do, somewhere.’ Loki said. 'Every vampire has a soulmate.'

‘I’ve been to every single town and city in the world, spent weeks at each place, searched in clubs, bars, restaurants, everywhere. A soulmate for me doesn’t exist.’ Chris snarled, though his voice broke a little near the end.

‘Tell Loki what you told me about your job.’ Claire said softly.

Chris clenched his jaw and narrowed his eyes at Claire, then he looked at Loki with a sigh. He put his hands on his hips.

‘Fine. You want the truth? Look, I’m sorry for kidnapping Claire. For trying to hurt you. I was jealous when Claire first came along, that your soulmate literally just walked right into your life when I’ve spent centuries searching for mine. Then when dad told us about the school board wanting you to have my job, I snapped. I love that job, I love my students, vampires and humans. Seeing them thrive and grow, getting excited for being accepted into Universities or Colleges that they applied for, getting jobs that they’ve dreamed of. Helping the young vampires work their way through their first few years where their instincts are at their strongest. The thought of it all being taken away… especially by you, just made me see red. You’ve got everything I want, but you wouldn’t have if I didn’t turn you. Being a vampire isn’t so bad, is it? Better than being dead, surely? Yet you’ve never forgiven me for making that decision, to save my little brother in the only way possible.’

It was then Loki’s turn to get emotional. Claire saw the realisation wash over Loki’s face, his eyes began to water as he stepped backwards until he was leant against the table for support.

‘I… I didn’t realise you’d been searching for your soulmate. I also didn’t realise how much it affected you when I was hit by the car… I’ve been a fool… You’re not wrong, being a vampire is better than death. I just… I just didn’t see it at the time and was so angry and scared at the same time, it clouded my judgement. I’m… sorry, for not being thankful that you saved me. For not ever listening or giving you a chance.

I looked up to you so much, Chris. As my big brother. You were always there for me, looking out for me. When I was told about you and dad being vampires, I was crushed. Though I did come round to the idea, when dad explained about the blood bank… but then I learned that you didn’t agree with it. I was scared of you, the way you just drank from humans and killed them without care. That was a side to you I had never seen, didn’t want to see. I didn’t want to become like that, so when you turned me, I was terrified about doing the same. I've got your blood literally running through my veins, not just as brothers.'

Chris eyes widened a little at Loki’s words, his stance softened and he wasn’t quite as guarded anymore. ‘Scaring you was the last thing I wanted to do, I never wanted you to see me like that… I didn’t even want to tell you about us being vampires but dad was insistent about telling you the truth. That’s why my relationship with him dwindled even more, he just went ahead and told you anyway. I was scared of it causing a rift between us, and rightfully so. That’s exactly what happened.’

‘I would have found out sooner or later. I was beginning to wonder why you and dad never aged.’ Loki sighed and paused for a second. ‘I don’t want to take your job. You didn’t listen to me when dad told us. You are good at it, I know that. I was all for telling the board I didn’t want it and that you should remain the head teacher, until you went nuts and tried to kill me. That’s the first time I’ve genuinely thought you were actually attempting to murder me.’

Chris looked down. ‘I know. I’m ashamed to admit that I think I was, I just saw blind rage. I can’t excuse it.’ He shrugged and looked back up at Loki. ‘I can’t change who or what I am. But part of who I am, still cares and loves his little brother. Always has done. Always will. Even it that means being hated, at least you’re alive.’

Loki and Chris stared at one another for what felt like the longest time. Then, eventually, Loki stood up straight and walked towards him, Chris wasn’t sure what he was about to do at first. Though Loki opened his arms and hugged him tightly. Chris was frozen on the spot for a minute, his brain took some time to process what was going on.

Though the moment Chris put his arms around Loki in return, both of them instantly felt a relief of sorts, the love and bond they once had when Loki was younger came flooding back. All the good times and memories.

When they let go from the longest hug, they both had watery eyes. Though as they both took a step backwards, Claire was sat on the chair at the side, in floods of tears at the scene. They both turned their heads to look at her and chuckled.

‘You guys… That was… so beautiful.’ She sobbed and pulled her cloak round to wipe her eyes.

Chris rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. ‘Well… I’m away to go back to the hunt before it’s all over. I’m sorry, Claire. For kidnapping you and scaring you.’

Claire stood and walked over to Loki, still wiping her eyes. ‘I… I understand why you did. Though not to say it wasn’t scary at the start, but I’m glad that something good has come out of it in the end.’

Loki nodded in agreement, he put his arm around Claire tightly and kissed the top of her head.

‘Though if you ever hurt or kidnap her again, brother or not, I’ll beat the shit out of you.’ Loki growled at Chris.

Chris smirked and as he walked by, he patted Loki on the shoulder. ‘Sure you will, lil bro.’

Loki felt a strange sensation in his heart. It had been a long time since Chris called him that, he used to always use that nickname for him. It made him smile a little as Chris headed out the door and took off.

Claire wrapped her arms around Loki’s waist and hugged him tightly. Loki pressed his face into her hair and he breathed in deeply.

‘Let’s get you home.’ He hummed and squeezed her tightly.

#tom hiddleston #loki #loki x ofc #loki fic #the redbridge hunts #chris motionless #vampire loki

[blacklegsanjiii]

Rest in peace Perona her efforts will not be in vain… she’s having the formative sapphic experience of Definitely flirting with someone but them being too oblivious to ever pick it up so they’re just stuck in a friendship hole.

And the boys with Zoro 😭 they’re not doing any better . They miss their brother…!

Though thinking about it with what you said about not really believing in soul marks in regards to Zoro and zosan being implied to be soulmates, I feel like if that ever came up they’d tear him a new one . Zoro is entirely decked out in threes. The swords, the earrings, he prefers doing things in sets of three (new thing he didn’t know about himself that the brothers point out to him actually) , so is their three just not good enough for him??? Huh ???

Though also that leads me to ask. How are zosan in this au? I imagine they’re kinda turbulent in their usual way, but it would be fun to know more 👁️

- Wine

THIS IS SO LONG WINE! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME??

(thank you this is very fun)

Perona will never be forgotten! Mihawk will also make sure she knows her failures are not her fault, but that it is quite funny to see her fail. Perona argues that it's easier for him and Sora just because they have soulmarks. Sora then tells them about their first meeting and that it was a whole event and she's surprised the guards didn't kill him. Mihawk argues that he would have just kidnapped her then and there and killed the guards if they wouldn't release him. Sora just frowning at him with crossed arms. Mihawk stares back and points out it was an entirely valid option.

Where as 124ji miss their brother and whine about not being able to talk to him or get any updates on him for two years. They look at the hilts and braids on Zoro's swords and think of their brother and his mark. They ask Zoro about his mark and he shrugs and shows them. It's a school of all different types of fish in the bluest blue they've seen but it's on his back. They ask if they know who his soulmate is because they know. They can tell who it is but Zoro has no clue and doesn't care really. So they don't tell him. When Mihawk finds out he asks Zoro why he thinks denying himself will make him stronger at some point during their training together. Zoro says he wants to focus on fulfilling his dream and making sure Luffy becomes the king of the pirates. Mihawk sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose and points out he didn't get become the greatest until he was in his thirties, after he saved Sora and started raising all the kids. Zoro shrugs and says that doesn't know what that has to do with him and Mihawk says it's a waste to ignore the power of having something to protect, that having that person, that family draws a strength greater than just wanting to be the the greatest.

Zoro shrugs and 124ji bemoan their brother going through soulmate rejection because they remember the rose colored view of soulmates Sanji had. Zoro looks at them with confusion and Niji says they were right about it when they were younger. Zoro asks what they mean and they point out the three swords, three earrings, that he does do things in three so what is about Sanji that he doesn't like so he rejects his soulmate. Zoro is staring at them. Because they're clearly fed up and they're talking about how they were right when they were younger about his soulmate not loving him as much as they do. Zoro argues he's never even seen the cook's soulmark and Mihawk chides his sons to be quiet. Zoro didn't want to know or be held back by his soulmate after all.

Zoro of course is thinking back to the cook asking him about soulmates in Cocoyashi after they saved Nami and her village and what he told the cook who nodded and stayed quiet. The agression and snide remarks. Of course it had to be the cook. Zoro always found Sanji when the blond got lost in the woods and always tailored food to him. So now Zoro, who's kinda been a dick to his soulmate for months and he's staying with his family and planning to kill his dad. The blond who has been telling people he knows his soulmate but they're not together, won't ever be together. The blond who sometimes gets a faraway look in his eye before going back to give his all to care for the crew.

Also like Sanji has to absolutely have game if Zoro "rejected" him. With all the flirting he was doing as a teen hoping to find his soulmate he has gotta have so much fucking game. So Zoro is with Mihawk and Sora and their kids and Perona as he running through the gambit of emotions of what happened up until Sabaody and he just looks like when Perona hit him with a ghost on Thriller Bark. Perona is yelling at Zoro that he's been so fucking dum and not cute because only he could reject his soulmate who is a one way ticket to Mihawk.

#black leg sanji #roronoa zoro #vinsmoke sanji #zosan #zoro roronoa #hawkeye mihawk #dracule mihawk x sora #dracule mihawk #mihawk x sora #vinsmoke sora #vinsmoke reiju #vinsmoke ichiji #vinsmoke niji #vinsmoke yonji #1234ji #vinsmoke brothers #vinsmoke family #vinsmoke siblinga #answers #soulmate au #sanzo #loved!sanji #perona

[lovezbrownies]

(MYandere! Superhero x GN!Reader)

Masterlist

(Decided to make an oc strictly non-sexual, so he is asexual, I noticed I've been making a lot of sexual fics lately and wanted to change it up :) have fun! Also made my posts prettier )

Synopsis: You don't check the news often enough, so when civilians were warned against walking near or through a certain area you were none the wiser... Giving your stalker a chance to save you from doom.

Luminary x Reader.

Warnings: Mentioned stalking, kidnapping, not edited at all :(.

You had a routine. Get up bright and early for your 7 AM office job, get to work, come home at 2 PM, relax for 2 or so hours, then go out for a short walk at the park near your apartment. You never really deviate from your usual walking pattern, yet today you felt adventurous– Ironic, of all days to be adventurous and wander off to a new path that same exact path ends up being infested with blood-lusted slime creatures from the dark abyss of this world.

Obviously you thought something was off but you just could not put your finger on it! Sure it was creepy how as you kept walking the area got quieter, lonelier, darker, but you just thought that there was some superhero nearby and everyone wanted a picture with them, that has happened before. Or maybe today just wasn’t your day, your natural ‘hey this feels dangerous let’s turn back’ system may be experiencing some difficulties… And now you find yourself running faster than you have ever run in your life. Leaping away from the hungry monsters attempting to catch you and devour you.

These slimy demons had popped up a few decades ago, a few years after the sudden appearance of super humans. No one knows where either came from, how they sprung, or the exact science behind their sudden appearance. But now they’re here, not a lot of people get blessed with super powers, and those who do immediately get enlisted, either by their own will or their parents force them to when they’re young. Some people don’t enlist even with superpowers, some people have such rare superpowers that they’re forced into the work field, those people mostly being healers and supernaturally intelligent people.

You were none of those, a normal average human, with a normal average job, and a normal average routine. And here you were, endangering your life, for your stupid physical health. Not like you’d have any of your physical health after this, you’re going to be in a monster’s stomach in about 5 minutes. You already were slowing down, the constant zig zagging decreasing your stamina fast. Looking back at the monsters chasing you.

What you didn’t expect was to stumble over an exposed cable, falling flat on your face, your ears start ringing, blocking out the noises of your own panting and whimpering as well as the monster's evil noises. You immediately huddled into the fetal position, as if it would minimize any of the tormenting pain you’ll be feeling soon but… nothing, no ripping of the skin, no crushing of the bones, no hearts being slowly devoured by evil monsters. None of it. 

Yet you kept your eyes clenched shut, maybe the monsters are confused with your stupidity that they just stood there processing before they finally have at it. Slowly the ringing in your ears subsided, and you heard nothing, no growling monsters or anything, nothing other than your own panting, as well as… footsteps? The sound of a sly chuckle startles you, causing you to crack open your eyes and you were greeted by the shining bright smile of the world famous superhero, Luminary.

Luminary– A man of unnaturally strong power, he was invincible, untouchable. You liked him enough for saving the city many times before but didn’t really idolize him, superhero or not he still was a human with human emotions, whatever people say about him online can still affect him. So you kept to yourself when it came to superhero affairs. But from the short snippets you’d see online you had a lot in common with him, shows, interests, hobbies. You always thought that it was all a carefully crafted lie to make him seem more relatable to the average plebeians, or whatever who knows.

You were star struck, ironically enough you wanted to act normal around him but you couldn’t even form words. Luminary’s shining smile still pointed towards you. He held out his hand, intending for you to grasp at it and use it to steady yourself up. “Hello there! I take it you haven’t seen the news this morning, huh? Haha! No worries, your trusty hero is always there to save you.” You just sat there gaping up at him, the personal embodiment of a star. 

Maybe it was the exhaustion, the shock, or the superhero in front of you, but you fainted, completely collapsed, thankfully you didn’t hit your head since you were already lying down.

Luminary had watched you run for your life from the creatures earlier. But he couldn’t care less of them, his eyes were on you, the person he’s had a crush on since the 11th grade, you never knew of his existence but he didn’t care, he’ll eventually weasel his way into your life but right now he’s content on stalking you. Or so he thought, until you endangered your life and almost got yourself killed when you tripped.

Seeing the once in a lifetime opportunity to weasel his way into your life. Luminary picked you right off the dirty ground, his heartbeat accelerating, every little part of you he touches feels like electricity. Years of one sided obsession and just now is he making contact with you, practically committing himself to abstinence just for you. Luminary felt like a schoolgirl as he giggled at the sight of you resting your head on his shoulder.   Luminary’s flight home was delightful, you smelt amazing, and you even snuggled into him in your sleep! He could just explode! Once he entered his humble abode, Luminary placed you on his bed, his eyes practically turning heart shaped at the thought of late night cuddles with you…

#x reader #yandere x reader #oc x reader #yandere x darling #gn reader #yandere oc #yandere oc x reader #yandere hero #yandere hero x reader

[juggalomary]

did yall miss me. i hope you did bc im returning with a bang. anyways here’s this. warnings: mcd, child abuse. up on ao3 within a few days

A new day, a new disaster, that’s what soap would say. He was always an optimist. Never heard saying anything about how they were likely going to die on suicide missions. Even though it was so valiantly obvious. He has to be watching from his overwatch position right now.

Ghost was glad to have him on his 6. They’d been switching places more often, soap on overwatch and sniping the people trying to end his life. He never called out to him about these people. Sometimes they’d just end up dead.

He always knows it was soap though, who else could do that so accurately. Soap was the best of the best. He’s not going to let ghost die. He’s not that selfish, never was.

Soap was the best of the best, most morally sound. He held his religion above many temptations. Infil was filled with chatter most of the time, except for soap, running his thumb over rosaries and whispering to a power long forgotten by the other men.

Exfil, a shell shocked soap would sit silently, or wail for not his mother, or ghost, but for someone, god maybe, to end his suffering. He was already going to hell, that’s what a priest told him at 15. He confessed and was told his punishment.

Never repeating that confession to anyone else, in fear of rejection. At 16 he carried his older cousin's casket in between the pews of that same church. He got home and told to man up. He turned 17 and enlisted.

That led to right now, soap covering his 6 and ghost shouting for help. A bullet lodged into his spine, blood gushing from the wound. His screams would’ve revealed his position if he cared anymore. There was no way he would get out of this. He just needed to get to a position he could radio to exfil from.

The enemy must’ve heard his screaming for Johnny, there was no response from soaps end. He must’ve been comprised.

The thundering footsteps we’re getting louder needed to move.

He pulled his hands above his head, chin resting on the ground. Looking up from under his eyebrows he saw about 20 meters until cover.

Pushing his arm to unbend he grabbed for purchase on the grass. He needed to pull himself forward to get to cover. His legs proving useless he grabbed a handful of grass and pulls. It rips.

He keeps trying to pull himself forward, but with every futile grasp comes a handfull of dirt and roots. The footsteps grow louder. He can’t die like this.

He screams in pain and frustration. Johnny is comprised, he’s comprised. It’s a solo mission, he needs to call exfil there’s no price here to scoop his useless self off the floor. He could cry. He won’t cry.

He grabbed a rock and pulled himself forward a foot. That’s okay, he’ll to cover soon. He’ll stay awake, he’ll stay strong. He will not cry.

Another idea comes to mind. He pulls 2 knives from his kit and stabs one into the dirt to use as a sort of handle.

One foot at a time he drags himself to the tree line. Sitting up to access his radio he leans on a tree.

He calls laswell. He needs exfil. He needs to leave. He’s losing blood, but he can’t feel it, he’ll pull through.

His eggs were twisted in horrible ways, he didn’t feel that pain, but he also couldn’t move them. He’ll be okay, he can just rest his eyes for a few minutes. His eyes were far to tired.

Nothing from soap. Nothing from laswell, there’s no point in staying awake, he’ll wake up to the radio transmission.

His eyes fall open again.

“-nom, SIMON! COME IN!” A young woman was on the other side of his radio.

“Mom? Mom I’m scared, I don’t want you to leave me here with him again.” It seemed he was crying.

“Simon who’s there, I’m coming, we need to know where you are.”

“Mommy I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to. I’m in the woods mom. Please don’t let him find me. He had a bat mom.” Drearily weeping through the radio was not something that elete SAS lieutenants do. But his mom was back, he missed her so much.

She tried her damn best, especially since he was stuck with his bummy ass father. She tended to his wounds whenever she was sober. She took beatings for him when he was too young to know he’s a man and he should be taking it. She wiped his tears whenever he came crying. Somehow it wasn’t enough.

He still had his tooth knocked out, he still was given drugs before he realized what they were. He still had to see that sex worker die. He still has to kiss that snake.

Haven forgotten about that snake until right now the hissing in his ear was not of any relief. It should’ve, it would mean his radio was working. His hands were too heavy to really hit the button to turn it on though.

Tears were not allowed though. The snake was in his ear, not biting his lip, his mom was talking to him. And Johnny would be back soon.

“Ghost, Simon, do you copy.”

“Mom I’m not alone anymore”

Crunching could he heard, a dark figure approaching him. He had a pistol. He shot the gun, but the bullet shot right next to his ear. He let himself relax, foolishly.

The man in front of him was his father, but his face was skewed. One part of it was his father, and the other half was of price. The side with price reached out and told him to calm down and stay awake. Then price was gone and it was just his father.

He was screaming, not Simon, Simon would recognize who was screaming and it wasn’t himself. A blow landed on his head, he saw it but didn’t feel it. His father was standing there, his mouth was moving but he wasn’t saying anything. Then he hissed like a snake. Mouth open he saw the snake that bit him all those years ago, he started screaming for real this time.

The snaked closed is mouth and then said something in Spainish. This man was none other than a cackling manual roba. Scalpel in one hand he laughed. The scar on his ribs flared up as he was called every insult under the sun. He was told to not fear as, it would feel so nice soon.

Turning his head out of the grasp roba has on his face he was met with Vernon’s rotting skeletal face. There was dirt in his eyes, ears, mouth, nose. He was buried.

“GHOST!”

“Mom? Save me.”

“Ghost who’s with you right now.”

He opens his eyes, praying he can see at the end of this all. Scratched corneas would end his career, and his career is all that he had left.

In front of him, soap was sitting, thumbing his rosaries and mumbling a prayer. Without greeting he looks up. “Simon, I’ve missed you.”

“Ghost. I repeat, who is with you?”

“Johnny. Bye mommy, I’ll see you soon.”

With his final goodbye to the only person to truly love him, he can rest.

“Simon, I loved you too.” A Scottish lilt was the last thing he heard before the world went silent. He laid his head on the tree and closed his eyes. He hoped that Johnny was in the next 7 minutes. And price and Gaz. Maybe he can finally see them again too. Laswell will join them at some point. Then they can meet her wife. Maybe she’ll have kids after retirement.

He hoped he was happy.

-

Ghost was found 2 days later. Soaps rosary in his pocket and tear tracks running down his face wiping off the eye black.

Task force 141 was together, earthly and in spirit. Buried in the national cemetery one next to the other.

#fanfic #ghoap #simon ghost riley #john soap mactavish #soapghost #ao3 #cod mw2 #call of duty #ao3 crosspost #kate laswell #agnst #heavy angst #main character death #don’t like don’t read

[aclockworkfilmsnob]

While Dune is (still) often misread as a tale about a hero doing the right thing, to view it solely as a warning of charismatic leaders is also misleading.

At least for the films, Paul isn’t really a bad guy for most of the story. Sure, he acts on impulse and is sometimes selfish. But he’s a kid. He’s lived a sheltered existence his whole life. The only friends and family he’s ever known were taken away from him in one fell swoop.

He clearly knows that exploiting the fremen is wrong and is even critical of his father (easily the most morally-sound Atreides in the series) for what he interprets as manipulation. He resents what his mother and the Bene Gesserit did to manipulate them into waiting for a messiah and constantly makes it clear that he doesn’t believe in these things.

Yes, he fancies himself a leader and a hero. But it’s not because he wants to be a God. He wants to be like his father. Noble, kind, heroic and honorable. But he never received the proper training. He sat in on one meeting at a time when he wasn’t even sure he wanted to be Duke.

His biggest enemy, aside from the Harkonnens and the Bene Gesserit, is the ignorance that comes from his youth. The same thing happens to Chani. Paul tells her he can’t go South. He knows what will happen if he does. But she, despite being very intelligent in knowing the danger of an outsider like Paul, believes that the power of true love will get them through any conflict.

Like Jessica, Paul becomes corrupted by the water of life. Any selfish intention he had before is accentuated by the poison. By this point in the film he’s basically a supervillain. In many respects Paul is just as much a victim of exploitation as the fremen are. He had no choice in how Jessica raised him. He didn’t choose to become a target for the Reverend Mother, who purposefully turned the Harkonnens against the Atreides because he was deemed to dangerous.

Paul is a bad guy by the end of Dune Part 2. It’s scary that people don’t see that. His “lead them to paradise” line after he digs his army into a deeper hole than he could have ever imagined clearly demonstrates that he intends to use fear and promises of peace to motivate the fremen to do whatever he wants. But he doesn’t get to this place because he’s always been evil to the core. He got there because he too was a victim of circumstance.

Anyway, that’s all I have to say. Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

#dune #denis villeneuve #Paul Atreides #film analysis

[blizzardstarx]

oh heres aura lore + Angel and Taqqiq rp lore + Raptor and Jack rp prequel lore @castiels-destiny

Aura was born as Storm (?) in the Mountain Pack, and he had a best friend named Lightning. Long story short, his friend betrayed him and framed him of a murder, and Aura kills him, but then gets killed by another wolf in his pack.

They become a spirit wandering around the spirit world, seeking revenge on Lightning, and meets a group of powerful spirits that take him as their apprentice, and he gets more and more powerful, and leaves once his apprenticeship is done, tracking down Lightning and fighting and killing him.

They fight Angel in the spirit world, and they fight for some reason? It was dumb, but Angel beats him and gets another chance at life, as Aura and Angel were like the top two most powerful spirits, eventually starting at the house where Taqqiq met Angel

However, Aura has to face the Trials of Death (lmao it was kinda based on the Hercules myth) and through one of his trials, they help Talon escape his eventual doom in the lab, of which Harpy had a vision of. Aura gets to return to his pack in the mortal realm, but time has passed and he doesn’t know anyone, leaving to help other wolves, and defeat his rival, Angel, whenever they would meet. (they meet again (aura talon and harpy were together and met them) in the Angel and Taqqiq rp first part, but this is wayyy later)

Aura adopts a pup named Blizzard! And he also hangs out with Talon and Harpy sometimes, im pretty sure they live together

They find Taqqiq (when she was a young fox pup) I think? but she runs from them cause she has trauma with wolves, as a pack had killed her parents and was on her tail, and she escapes to Angel’s house, which she didn’t know he was there

LOTS of stuff happened in the Angel and Taqqiq rp and 90% of it was on my old account sadly and in the server i met my friend in, which the channel got deleted (other than auras backstory)

pretty sure my friends oc Angel’s lore has changed a lot but in the recent Raptor and Jack rp there were the Holy Three, Jack, Angel, and Ghale (all my friend’s ocs) that were basically demigods, but Angel disappeared because he was fighting Aura

damn this timeline confusing asf

okay so Creature School rp (few years later) -> Raptor and Jack rp (few years later) -> Angel & Taqqiq + DWW Part Ones -> DWW Part 2 -> Angel & Taqqiq Part 2

angel mentions to taqqiq once about the DWW after he returned from giving Quint redemption and Wildcat resurrecting him (angel had left taqqiq for a while)

oh also i forgot to say why Halfmask was with Raptor and Quint, he wanted a new job other than being a spy lmao but he was still technically spying for the Light Tribe as the job had suspicious activity

also heres my power list lol from most powerful to least

uh. move Lux to above or alongside Halfmask, it would be quite embarrassing if the leader of the Light Tribe was weaker 😭😭

oh btw axel from creature school featured in the angel and taqqiq rp

there was a crimson cult or some shit in the raptor and jack rp

angel bursts theough the ceiling to execute jack LMFAOOOO because of the holy three code but raptor stops him

#blizz’s nonsense #Aura!!! #what do i tag this 😭😭😭 #Wildcat!!! #Halfmask!!!

[illdowhatiwantthanks]

Postpartum

Amelia Shepherd x fem!reader Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI (NSFW), sex, oral sex, hella eating out, fingering, etc., mentions of anatomy/body parts, some explicit language, post-pregnancy times (please let me know if I've left anything out!) Word Count: 2.0k

Summary: You're six weeks postpartum, and your doctor has cleared you for sex, but you're worried that it might not be the same anymore. Amelia assuages all of your worries. 😉

Request Info: This was requested by an anonymous user, but the request itself accidentally got deleted! The user also requested that the reader be an ortho surgeon and a third twisted sister. Whoever you are, I hope you find this, and I'm so sorry to have lost your original request!

“You’re good to go,” your OBGYN declared, finishing up your 6-weeks postpartum checkup.

You raised your eyebrows at her. “As in, good to go?”

She laughed. “Good to go, as in cleared to resume any and all sexual activity as you feel ready for it.”

You nodded and repeated it to yourself. “Good to go…”

But as you left Grey-Sloan, making a quick stop at the ortho unit to say hello to the nurses and the other attendings, you couldn’t help but wonder if you really were good to go. Sure, you missed sex with Amelia. You missed her body, missed connecting with her in that way, but you were also so self-conscious. You hadn’t had any major tears or anything, but you had shoved a human head out of your vagina less than two months ago. It was bound to be different down there. It felt different. What if sex didn’t feel good anymore? What if it never did? Or, even worse, what if it looked or felt different for Amelia, and she didn’t like sleeping with you anymore?

You decided to text Meredith and Cristina about it, as you so often did about any and everything.

Y/N: You guys I’ve been cleared for sex

M: Yay!

C: Good for you bitch

Y/N: I’m kinda scared tho…

M: Aw, why?

Y/N: Does it hurt after? Or like idk was Derek weirded out?

C: It feels like I could have been left out of this conversation

M: Shut up Cristina we’re being supportive! And no Y/N it didn’t hurt. You just have to take it slow and do what feels good at the time. And stop if it doesn’t feel good.

C: You don’t have a dick to deal with so you should be okay

M: CRISTINA

Y/N: I mean tbh we have several

M: Ew she’s my sister I didn’t need to know that…

C: I need to know more…

You shook your head and smiled. You decided that you might as well try, if Amelia was up for it. And there was no question that Amelia was up for it. She’d powered through like a champ, but before this, the longest you’d gone without having sex was two weeks and that was only because you’d been brought in as a specialist on a case at another hospital.

When you walked into the apartment, everything was quiet–a rarity at your house these days. You crept through the rooms, looking for Amelia and Pippa, and finally found them in the nursery. Amelia held Pippa to her chest, bouncing her softly as she slept, little chubby cheeks pressing out like she was blowing bubbles.

You placed a hand on Amelia’s back and kissed her on the cheek. You nodded toward Pippa, eyebrows scrunched.

“I just can’t bring myself to put her down,” Amelia whispered. “How was your appointment?”

“Good.”

Amelia stared pointedly at you. “Good good?”

You nodded, smirking.

If Pippa had not been tiny and fragile, Amelia would have tossed her into the crib like a football.

She placed the baby gently on her back in the crib, then crashed into you with the force of a tidal wave–or six weeks of no sex.

She pushed you into the hallway wall, shutting Pippa’s door behind her, and pressed into you, her mouth and hands desperate. She ran her tongue up and down your neck and back to your mouth and yanked your shirt over your head. God, you’d missed this. You’d missed her. Even though she’d been right here next to you the whole time. She groaned as she pushed herself into you, and you smiled into her kiss.

At this rate, Amelia would be finished before you even had a chance to make it to the bed.

“No, no!” she whined as you pulled away, her blue eyes pleading desperately with you.

“Come to bed, Amy,” you teased, taking her by the hand and leading her to the bedroom.

You gently removed her clothes and pushed her onto the bed. “You first,” you said.

She grabbed at your face hungrily as you leaned over her, kissing you with all the fervor of someone who’s love has been lost at sea for several years. She gasped and arched her back as your hand grazed over her clit.

You couldn’t help but smile at how needy she was, her hips bucking into your hand as you held it still, cupping her heat.

“Y/N, don’t fucking tease me,” she scolded, her voice stuttering. “It’s been way too long for that.”

“Oh, you don’t like that?” you said, smug. It was not often that Amelia was this powerless in bed. Usually it was the other way around, so you were enjoying this moment.

She grabbed your face, rough, and then soft as she ran her hand through your hair. “Just finish me already so I can get inside you.” She pulled your face closer, her breath hot in your ear as she whispered. “I’ve missed the taste of you.”

You’d never switched gears faster. No more power trips, just getting Amelia off as quickly as possible.

You kissed and licked your way down her body, intoxicated by the way she pushed into you and pulled you closer. By the time you reached her center, she was panting and glistening and you knew it'd only be a matter of minutes before she was absolute putty.

You pressed soft kisses into her inner thighs, then closer and closer until she was nearly bursting with the want of you, so that when you finally, finally, wrapped your mouth around her clit, she nearly lost her mind. You held her hips in place as she moaned, licking your way through her, around her, inside of her until she was shaking in your arms, hips rolling to meet your tongue. And for the final touch, you slipped two of your fingers inside of her, curling down and around, just how you knew she liked it. Her hands were gripping your hair so hard you thought might pull it out. “Y/N!” she gasped, her breath coming out in short, sharp moans as she came on your fingers. You smiled as you buried your face in her, guiding her through her high and back down again.

“Holy shit,” she breathed, her chest still heaving.

“Good?” you asked, already knowing the answer, as you wiped your mouth.

She nodded, still struggling to catch her breath. “Give me a second.”

You lay down next to her, feeling wildly pleased with yourself, especially when Amelia rolled over on top of you and pressed her mouth into yours, moaning as she tasted herself on your lips.

But as she worked her way down your body, anxiety shot through you.

You grabbed her hand. “Amy, wait…”

She looked up at you, concerned.

“You don’t have to,” you said, avoiding her eyes.

“I know I don’t,” she replied, still looking at you curiously. “I want to. I’ve wanted to for months.”

“I think…” you stuttered. “I think I’d really rather you didn’t.”

Amelia’s eyebrows furrowed. “Hey,” she said, laying down next to you and propping herself up on her elbow so she could see your face. “What’s going on?”

“I’m just not ready.”

“That’s fine, but you seemed super ready about two minutes ago.”

You didn’t respond, fiddling with an edge of your comforter.

“Y/N,” she said, brushing your hair behind your ear. “Tell me what’s going on in that pretty head please.”

She took your hand and you played with her fingers for a moment before answering.

“I’m scared you won't like it.”

Amelia looked genuinely shocked. “You’re what now?”

“I got messed up down there,” you mumbled. “What if it’s not like normal for you?”

“Oh, babe,” she said, caressing your face. “You’re not messed up. You could never be messed up. You’re you and I love you. I love all of you.”

You stayed quiet.

“Honey,” she continued, more emphatic now. “Your body made a whole human. A human that is sleeping in the bedroom down the hallway. A beautiful, precious human that I love with all my heart and hope with all my heart stays asleep for a while so that I can get in there. She had her time. It's my fucking turn."

You couldn’t help but giggle a bit.

“Listen,” she ranted, excited that your mood was brightening and trying to make you laugh more. “I’m like the Lewis and Clark of vaginas, okay? The wilderness must be explored. I gotta get in there and get the lay of the land. And it might be new, right?”

You nodded, grinning and blushing.

“But new doesn’t mean bad. Lots of times new means better. So just… let me do my exploring, okay?”

“Okay,” you acquiesced.

Amelia was gentler with this attempt, slow and steady and worshipful as she moved down your body, taking her time especially at the place where your uterus still bulged, where new stretch marks had drawn their way across your abdomen. And when she got to your center, she was gentle there, too, mindful of your anxiety, mindful that it might take your body more time than usual to warm up.

She was loving and slow and obsessive, sighing with pleasure as she placed kisses along the inside of your thighs, on your clit, all over you. Amelia’s careful touch had washed away most of your anxiety, leaving behind your flushed face, the shuddering of your body each time her skin met yours.

And when finally, finally, she had you wet and whimpering, she dove in like a woman starved.

“Amy,” you breathed, lightly holding her head in your hands as you threw your own head back, your hips rising to meet her. You could feel her smile against you.

“You want more?” she asked, and you knew she meant, Do you want fingers or a strap or a toy or anything like that?

You shook your head. “No, just–” Your breath caught in your throat, replaced by a moan as the knot in your lower abdomen tightened.  “Just keep going.”

If there was one thing about Amelia, it was that she could eat you out forever. You’d been afraid that would change, but clearly your fears had been unfounded. She was insatiable.

“Amy–” you exclaimed, arching your back as your body approached the edge. You couldn’t even get the words out, just “Amy” over and over.

She reached up to grasp one of your hands in hers as you fell apart around her, Amelia lapping up every last bit of you.

You breathed heavily, watching as Amelia emerged from between your thighs, grinning like an idiot, her face an absolute mess.

You laughed as she wiped her face. “I take it your expedition went well?”

“God!” she exclaimed, flopping down beside you. “I missed you.”

“We literally have not been apart for weeks.”

“Okay, well, then I missed your vagina.”

You giggled, rolling over a bit to kiss her on the cheek. “You’re a dork.”

“Yeah, but I’m your dork,” Amelia retorted, pulling you in for another heated kiss.

You were interrupted then by a loud, crinkly wail through the baby monitor.

Amelia groaned, but you could see a smile creeping in. She stood and stretched. “I’ll go get her.”

“Amelia!” you hissed, throwing a pillow at her. “You can't bring her in here! We’re naked, and it smells like sex!”

“She’s six weeks old! She won’t remember!” Amelia nodded at you. “Go take a shower. Relax. Then we can switch. It's almost time to feed her anyway.”

You lay in bed a moment longer, waiting to hear Amelia on the baby monitor.

“Hello!” she cooed, her voice crackling through the speaker as Pippa continued to cry. “Hi, pretty girl! Oh, I know. I know. You want Mama? Let’s go see her. Oh, you love your mama, don’t you? Mommy does, too.”

You smiled, your heart full as you listened.

“We loooooove Mama, don’t we? Yes, we do. We love her so much.”

#amelia shepherd #amelia shepherd x reader #amelia shepherd x fem!reader #amelia shepherd drabble #amelia shepherd fluff #amelia shepherd smut #amelia shepherd one shot #amelia shepherd fanfic #grey's anatomy #grey's anatomy fanfic

[jennyboom21]

In 2023 actor Sophia Bush made headlines when she filed for divorce one year after a storybook wedding. By the fall it was public knowledge that she was in a new relationship. With a woman. The internet seemed to be foaming at the digital mouth for a scandal, but to those who knew her, it was clear she’d never been more herself. Here, in her own words, Bush speaks to the power of finally learning to listen to her intuition.

In April of 2022 I was close to calling off my wedding. Instead of running away, I doubled down on being a model wife. In 2023 my now ex-husband posted a lovely tribute to our first anniversary on Instagram. When I saw it, I felt the blood drain from my face. Fans and friends were telling me how exciting this milestone was and how happy I looked. I felt nothing. Things hadn’t been easy at home, but everyone says marriage is hard, right? As the day wore on, I felt mounting pressure from strangers online waiting for me to post something—what a strange part of public life to have to navigate—so I sat myself down and chose a picture.

It was a black-and-white photograph of us running away from the camera. Yes, I see the bittersweet irony now. I wrote a really nice story about the people in that picture. Except it was just that: a story. I typed something about how incredibly happy I was and tried to drown out the familiar voice in my head. Make it look easy. Make it look perfect. If your smile is shiny enough, maybe no one will notice that up close all of your teeth are broken. But sometimes broken is just broken.

I hit post. And then I walked into the bathroom and threw up.

I believe in people and ideas so deeply—and those feelings are often so powerful to me—that I hadn’t realized I’d spent the last two decades moving through life showing up for others but often turning my back on myself. This time things felt different. Maybe it’s just cold feet, I told myself. Maybe I was too sensitive. Maybe this was the feeling you get when you settle down later in life and have to make space for another person. There have been moments in my life when it feels like the universe is screaming at me to pay attention. This was one of them, but I didn’t listen.

I kept repeating the adages we all know so well: Relationships are hard. Marriage takes compromise. You know the rest. And so I got married. We threw one of the greatest wedding weekends ever. We had an amazing time with our closest friends and family. It was truly one of the best parties I’ve ever been to, and we raised a ton of money for charity. I don’t regret any of that.

But after the wedding I found myself in the depths and heartbreak of the fertility process, which was the most clarifying experience of my life. It feels like society is finally making space for brutally honest conversations about how hard and painful any fertility journey is, but I kept mine private. I was trying to get through months of endless ultrasounds, hormone shots, so many blood draws that I have scar tissue in my veins, and retrieval after retrieval, while simultaneously realizing the person I had chosen to be my partner didn’t necessarily speak the same emotional language I did.

As I lost track of how many examination tables I had lain on alone, I felt something in me seismically shift. Six months into that journey, I think I knew deep down that I absolutely had made a mistake. It would take my head and heart a while longer to understand what my bones already knew.

And that’s why, when I got an opportunity to do a play in London, I had to go. I had to get out of our house. I had to get onstage. I had to get back in my body. Maybe that could shift things. Maybe that would jump-start the joy I’d been chasing. The play slowly began to put me back together. It was grueling, and it was also the most exhilarating experience. I loved every second of it.

But the book doesn’t lie. The body does, in fact, keep the score. When half of our company went down with a virus, everyone recovered fast except for me. I continued to decline. I would put every fiber of my being into my performance onstage, and then be packed in bags of ice as soon as the curtain closed. I spent multiple nights in the hospital, I was pumped with endless amounts of fluids, I underwent cardiac testing and organ monitoring. It was clear that my body was screaming and I had to listen. It was hard for me to accept. I was part of a team. But I needed to go home, where my doctors (and, truthfully, my health insurance) could get a better handle on my symptoms. My time in London was over. So was my marriage. It all came crashing down at once.

During the summer of 2023, I moved back into my empty home in LA. I was separated and preparing to file for divorce, and groups of women in my life started opening up about issues they were going through in their own homes. It seemed like every week there were more of us, including [former US soccer player] Ashlyn [Harris], whom I’d first met in 2019 and who was in the process of figuring out her own split from her wife. She’d been such a kind ear for those of us who opened up about our problems during a shared weekend of speaking engagements at a fancy conference in Cannes, and soon it became clear that she needed our ears too.

For those of us who had no solution in sight or Hail Marys left, having this community changed everything. We really wrapped one another up in support. It was tragic and hard. But it was also beautiful. There were moments of incredible sadness because no one signs up to get married thinking it’ll end. The days when we knew people needed to laugh, we sent inspirational memes and silly TikToks. We read books written by great therapists and shared emo quotes from poets. Our “Begin Again” Amazon shopping list, which we created for the ones moving out and starting over, has now been forwarded to so many other women.

I didn’t expect to find love in this support system. I don’t know how else to say it other than: I didn’t see it until I saw it. And I think it’s very easy not to see something that’s been in front of your face for a long time when you’d never looked at it as an option and you had never been looked at as an option. What I saw was a friend with her big, happy life. And now I know she thought the same thing about me.

It really took other people in our safe support bubble pointing out to me how we’d finish each other’s sentences or be deeply affected by the same things. When you’re so in the trenches of hardship—plus you have the added weight of having to go through it on a public stage—it can be hard to see anything but what’s right in front of you.

It took me confronting a lot of things, what felt like countless sessions of therapy, and some prodding from loved ones, but eventually I asked Ashlyn to have a non-friend-group hang to talk about it.

And that meal was four and a half hours long and truly one of the most surreal experiences of my life thus far. In hindsight, maybe it all had to happen slowly and then suddenly all at once. Maybe it was all fated. Maybe it really is a version of invisible string theory. I don’t really know. But I do know that for a sparkly moment I felt like maybe the universe had been conspiring for me. And that feeling that I have in my bones is one I’ll hold on to no matter where things go from here.

But there was a lot that quickly turned ugly too. People looking in from the outside weren’t privy to just how much time it took, how many painful conversations were had. A lot of effort was made to be graceful with other people’s processing, their time and obligations, and their feelings. What felt like seconds after I started to see what was in front of me, the online rumor mill began to spit in the ugliest ways. There were blatant lies. Violent threats. There were accusations of being a home-wrecker. The ones who said I’d left my ex because I suddenly realized I wanted to be with women—my partners have known what I’m into for as long as I have (so that’s not it, y’all, sorry!).

The idea that I left my marriage based on some hysterical rendezvous—that, to be crystal-clear, never happened—rather than having taken over a year to do the most soul crushing work of my life? Rather than realizing I had to be the most vulnerable I’ve ever been, on a public stage, despite being terrified to my core? It feels brutal. Just because I didn’t want to process my realizations in real time on social media and spell them out for the world doesn’t mean the journey wasn’t long and thoughtful and exhaustive.

It’s painful to be doing deep work and have it picked apart by clueless strangers. Everyone that matters to me knows what’s true and what isn’t. But even still there’s a part of me that’s a ferocious defender, who wants to correct the record piece by piece. But my better self, with her earned patience, has to sit back and ask, What’s the fucking point? For who? For internet trolls? No, thank you. I’ll spend my precious time doing things I love instead.

I don’t believe it’s my place to discuss details of Ashlyn’s circumstances or her children, but I will say that I am absolutely in awe of her relentless integrity. The way she prioritizes and centers her kids, not only in her life but in the core of her being, is breathtaking to behold. Falling in love with her has sutured some of my own childhood wounds, and made me so much closer to my own mother. Seeing Ashlyn choose to not simply survive, but thrive, for her babies has been the most beautiful thing I’ve ever witnessed a friend do. And now I get to love her. How lucky am I?

I sort of hate the notion of having to come out in 2024. But I’m deeply aware that we are having this conversation in a year when we’re seeing the most aggressive attacks on the LGBTQIA+ community in modern history. There were more than 500 anti-LGBTQIA+ bills proposed in state legislatures in 2023, so for that reason I want to give the act of coming out the respect and honor it deserves. I’ve experienced so much safety, respect, and love in the queer community, as an ally all of my life, that, as I came into myself, I already felt it was my home. I think I’ve always known that my sexuality exists on a spectrum. Right now I think the word that best defines it is queer. I can’t say it without smiling, actually. And that feels pretty great.

Would I have liked to make the public part of this journey a choice for myself, and not have it taken from my lips and set ablaze by gossip blogs and bottom-feeder online bots? Of course. I’m very aware, though, as we discuss bullying and harassment and being outed without consent—that I’m incredibly lucky this happened in my adulthood. I really love who I am, at this age and in this moment. I’m so lucky that my parents, having spent time with Ash over the holidays, said, “Well, this finally looks right.” I know it could have gone differently.

We’ve all learned about kids who have taken their own life after being outed or who have been killed simply for being who they are in a place or time that is threatened by their expressed joy. I am so lucky to be here, now. I have real joy. It took me 41 years to get here. And while I marvel at it, I will also make space for people’s pain. But I will not carry anyone’s projected shame. When I take stock of the last few years, I can tell you that I have never operated out of more integrity in my life. I hope that’s clear enough for everyone speculating out there, while being as gentle as I possibly can be.

After the news became public, my mom told me that one of her friends called her and said, “Well, this can’t be true. I mean, your daughter isn’t gay.” My mom felt that it was obvious, from the way her friend emphasized the word, that she meant it judgmentally. And you know what my mom said? “Oh honey, I think she’s pretty gay. And she’s happy.”

I finally feel like I can breathe. I don't think I can explain how profound that is. I feel like I was wearing a weighted vest for who knows how long. I hadn’t realized how heavy it was until I finally just put it down. This might sound crazy—but I think other people in trauma recovery will get it—I am taking deep breaths again. I can feel my legs and feet. I can feel my feet in my shoes right now. It makes me want to cry and laugh at the same time.

It is so, so scary to do the brave thing, to say, “I’m just not happy.” Especially if you’re in a partnership and you have to say it first. But if you do it, you get the chance to be happy. To find your joy. I turned 41 last summer, amid all of this, and I heard the words I was saying to my best friend as they came out of my mouth. “I feel like this is my first birthday,” I told her. This year was my very first birthday.

#sophia bush #her gf is an ass but I’d be hypocrite with any hateration #happy lesbian visibility week #coming out #the celesbians are restless