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#but i do not currently feel soft and happy when i think about season 2
morosexual-aziraphale · 10 months
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if anyone is wondering why I haven't drawn anything for season 2 yet it is because every time I try I just end up as a puddle of Feelings. it'll come to me
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honeipie · 14 days
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HOCKEY BOYS
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part 2; izuku midoryia x fem!reader
synopsis: the captain of japan’s hockey team has his eye on the coach’s daughter
( the smaller font is gonna be a flashback! )
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izuku midoryia, the black heron. people never really know what they are, and that’s what adds to his un-expecting nature. the black heron is most known for its unique methods for catching prey. the bird forms its wings to look like an umbrella, keeping out light from under them. the fish then mindlessly assume that this is shelter, some sort of safe haven. that is until the heron strikes, making sure that nothing is left behind.
he never wanted to get into any fights. if he had participated in one it’s likely because he had been roped into it trying to get katsuki out.
there were two reasons he didn't feel the need to fight. one, he just wasn't raised that way. if inko knew that he was picking any fight he could get she would drag him out of the rink by his ear. and the second was you.
"i don't like seeing you get hurt izu. especially when it's because of someone else" you had snuck back into the locker room once all of the players, plus your dad, had went home. the first aid kit sat by your side because he didn't let anybody else tend to him. he had said he was fine, but you weren't just going to let him go on in his current state.
"i know, i'm sorry" he mumbled under his breath, almost embarrassed that you had to see him this way "i just wanted to pull kacchan out of there. you know how he can be"
you placed a band aid on his cheek before placing your hand over it "i know you worry about him, but sometimes it's okay to let him fight his own battles. how will he learn if he never gets a chance?" his eyes gazed into yours and finally gave in. he let out a sigh leaning his head more into your hand.
"you're right. i'm sorry again"
you giggled at the sight of him. practically melting into you with the most apologetic tone. leaning in you placed a soft peck on his lips "it's okay my love. you're just trying to be the best captain you can be"
the kiss left him with a giddy smile on his face. he just loved you so much. it's not like he didn't want to make your relationship known to the world, he did. it's just your father was the problem.
yes, he was an amazing coach and mentor, but he played no games when it came to you. and yes, the two of you were both adults and could do what you wanted. it’s just that both of you knew that the news would probably piss him off for the rest of the season.
it really all started at one of the first practices you had attended, denki decided that it would be a bright idea to discuss just how attractive you were in the locker room.
"i mean did you even see her? she's gorgeous!"
sero chuckled grabbing his jersey "gorgeous, yeah, but she's the coach's kid, so messing with her is some dangerous game you're playing"
denki shrugged with a smirk on his face "i ain't afraid of a challenge" the locker room went silent after that comment. denki lifted his head up with a raised eyebrow "c'mon you can't tell me that you wouldn't want to get with her!"
"get with who exactly?"
the voice made denki's blood run cold. he gulped silently as he turned in his spot. he came face to face with your father who did not look happy. arms crossed, he took another step closer to him.
"get with who?"
“i- nobody-“
“i should shove you against these lockers right now. don’t ever speak of my daughter like that again do you hear me?” he looked up making sure to make eye contact with every single player in that room “this goes out for everyone. if one of you even thinks about getting with her then breakin’ her heart i swear i’ll make your career living hell. do you understand?”
a bunch of yes sir’s could be heard around the room. it was right on time, because you had just made your way into the locker room but with your back turned.
“everyone is decent right? i don’t wanna see anyone’s junk”
“you’re fine y/n” your dad shook his head as you turned around with a smile. in your hand you held a plate of cookies with labels on some of them “sweetheart, why would you bring those everyone’s on a strict diet”
you rolled your eyes taking off the plastic wrap “dad i know. that’s why i made the healthier cookies not the regular ones. they have flaxseed, bananas, oats, stuff like that!” you looked around the room with a happy smile “does anybody want one?”
the team looked down at the plate of cookies, then at you father. he nodded in approval which made them cheer in approval. you went around the locker room handing them each a cookie. when you got to izuku it was like the world stopped for a moment. freckles scattered across his face, and shifting when he went to smile.
his smile.
it was one of those things that you would never get tired of.
you’ve had a crush on him for a while, but had only seen him on television or from a distance. when your father said you could help out at the rink you’ve never been faster to agree.
“y/n?”
the sound of your name quickly pulled you from your daydreaming. izuku had been calling your name growing concerned each time you didn’t answer.
“sorry! i zoned out for a second there”
the smile made its way back onto his face hearing you were okay “good, i just wanted to know what the options were”
you explained everything that you had and he ended up taking one of the more plain cookies. deciding it was now or never, you made some conversation.
“you’re the captain right? how’s captaining?” what a smooth talker you were.
he chuckled a bit at your question “yeah, i am. captaining has been good. just hoping i can lead my guys to victory, y’know?”
you nodded along ready to leave before you embarrassed yourself any more, but there was one more thing you had to say.
“you’re doing great. the way you encourage your teammates and bring them all together is really inspiring. you can even tell the difference in the way they’re playing. just keep doing what you’re doing” with a smile you walked off going to hand off the last of your cookies.
red, everything was red. izuku had to turn his whole body just to make sure your father didn’t see the way he was blushing. the compliments you gave him were like cupid’s arrows to the heart.
katsuki stood next to him watching the whole interaction go down. with a shake of his head he sighed “you’re in fuckin’ trouble”
you had been “seeing” each other for a couple of weeks, but decided to make it official about six months ago. both of you being extremely happy and secure in your current relationship, and maybe when the hockey season was over you could really settle.
by the next game, izuku could take the small bandages off his face. there was no pre-game routine the two of you had, you didn’t need one. he knew you were there for him and only him, and you trusted him enough not to do anything. though you did keep a piece of him with you as he played.
usually you would wear a hoodie to games, so underneath you would wear one of his shirts. and don’t think forgot about you. izuku had carved your initials into his favorite hockey stick long ago. you decided on sitting in the box with the players on the bench, just on a separate chair. this game would be a big one, and you could tell by your fathers pacing back and forth.
“they’ve got this dad, don’t worry”
he sat down next to you with a heavy sigh “i know honey. we just can’t have anything go wrong” you gave him a pat on the back as you watched them line up. izuku had took his place with a focused gaze.
he was naturally a fun and playful person, but as soon as he stepped onto that ice, it was go time.
the starting sound rang out and they were off. speeding across the ice like their lives depended on it. you cheered every time a goal was scored making sure izuku could hear you above the others.
they were doing amazing in the first two periods. always up by at least three points. plus not even one fight insinuated from katsuki. it’s in the third period where you saw things start to get a little rocky. izuku was starting to slip. every time a certain player from the opposing team got near him he would miss a shot completely.
your dad whistled for him to come back over to the bench “kid the hell are you doing? get it together before you’re benched for the rest of the game, you hear me?” izuku gave him a silent nod, but you could tell that he was barely listening. you wanted to reach out, to ask what’s wrong, but all you could do was sit back and watch it happen. it was a good minute before izuku was let back on the ice again.
he had seemed to regather himself and was able to shoot a few passes, but once the player came back it all went downhill.
you could see your dad shaking his head out of the corner of your eye “dad maybe it’s just an off day. everybody has them-“
you had looked away for a second.
and when you looked back you saw izuku yelling at one of the players from the other team. the player had shoved him hard which gave izuku an opening. balling up his fists he sent a punch directly to his right cheek, but he didn’t stop there. he made sure to grab his jersey and pull him down to the ground with one hand and still tried to punch him with the other.
the refs finally stopped it when they saw the other guys nose was starting to bleed. two of them just had to pull izuku off the guy. he had been so distracted by what the guy said he didn’t even know he had kept going. you watched as they didn’t even drag him to the penalty box, but off the ice.
he couldn’t even look at you as he walked down the hallway back into the locker rooms.
“what the hell’s gotten into him-“
you didn’t wait for your dad to finish his sentence as you climbed over the small wall and headed down into the locker rooms.
“izu?” you saw him sitting on one of the benches head down and in his hands. there was some room next to him so you sat down gently rubbing his back “baby what happened out there?”
he didn’t talk right away, just trying to get his breathing back under control.
“they were just- just talking a bunch of shit. i didn’t care when they were doing it about me, that’s whatever. but somehow they know about me and you. the only people that really know is the team. i’m not sure how it even got to him”
it finally clicked. how he was playing, how the players kept getting close to him.
“you did it cause they were talking about me? izu you didn’t have to”
he shook his head “no, no i did have to. y/n you’re my girlfriend. if you think i’m gonna let some douchebag insult you when you’re not there to defend yourself then you’re crazy”
“oh izu” you cupped the other side of his cheek going to turn his head to face you. at first he wouldn’t meet your eyes, but it didn’t take long for his to find yours again “i am very thankful that you defended me like that. i would even say it was very, very hot”
this made him laugh, showing the smile you fell in love with.
“what i’m trying to say is thank you” you leaned in giving him a long kiss. when you pulled away you finally noticed the cuts and spot that was definitely going to bruise “i’ll get something to clean you up” you went to turn on the bench but stopped seeing someone standing in the doorway. the two of you stared in shock for a second before you got up “dad don’t do anything stupid”
he walked closer to the two of you, nodding his head towards the other hallway “the first aid kit hasn’t been refilled from the last fight. can you go find someone who can do that for us?”
“dad i don’t think”
“y/n”
“fine” you leaned down to kiss izuku’s cheek, but also whispered in his ear “i’ll be right back”
once you turned the corner, your father sat down next to izuku with a sigh. the green haired male looked down at his hands unsure what to say.
“son-“
“i love your daughter” he blurted out cheeks bright pink from embarrassment “really, really love her. and i know you don’t want anyone from the team dating her-“
“midoryia-“
“no sir, i’m sorry i have to finish this” izuku looked him straight in his eyes a small lump forming in his throat. this could either go amazingly well, or absolutely horrible. your father stared him down for a couple of seconds before nodding that he could continue “thank you sir” after taking a deep breath he went on to start.
“i tried to respect your wishes, i did. but every time i saw her, it was like i was drawn to her. i wanted to make her laugh because i love her laugh. and i wanted to make her smile more than anyone or anything. you raised such a kind, beautiful, and caring daughter that i just- just can’t imagine my life without. sorry if you think this is not manly of me, it’s definitely not how i thought this was going to go. thought i’d puff my chest out and do some big ‘it’s not your choice anyway’ shit but i’m not like that” he shook his head “you’re her father, and i respect that. i wanted to let you know how i really feel, and that she’s in good hands”
your father listened intently to izuku’s lovesick rambling. he noticed the way he smiled when he talked about you. along with some far off look in his eye. probably daydreaming about the future the two of you hold. lifting up a hand he clapped izuku on the back “i appreciate everything you’ve said. and i hope this doesn’t make it any less when i say this but.. i already knew about the two of you. maybe not dating but i could tell from every interaction the two of you had that something was going on”
izuku’s mouth hung open at the news. he just couldn’t believe that he had hid it for this long.
“i trust you. i trust you on the ice, and i trust you with my daughter. you’ve been nothing but good to her. so if you want my blessing you’ve had it for a long time. for what you two are doing now, and any plans you have in the future” with his other hand he tapped one of izuku’s fingers making his face turn a deeper shade of red.
“thank you sir. i’ve been thinking about it a lot lately and-“
“thinking about what?” you asked walking into the room with a first aid kit. eyebrows knit together at the sight of your fathers hand on izuku’s shoulder “dad please tell me you didn’t threaten him or something. i’m a grown woman and i think i should be able to be with whoever i want” you’ve been mustering up the courage to say that ever since you’ve retrieved the first aid kit. your father got up heading over to you.
“i agree”
“i can try to see where you’re coming from but- huh?” you stopped your practiced speech when he came over to hug you.
“he’s a good kid, and i can tell he loves you” he placed a gentle kiss at the top of your head “im sorry that i made you feel like you needed to hide this from me. your mother has told me countless times that we need to set boundaries and i never listened, but i am now”
you started to tear up, but quickly blinked them away “thank you dad. that means a lot” a horn sounded meaning that the brake was now over. he stepped away going back into the doorway before turning around.
“midoryia this doesn’t mean that you’re off the hook. you’re out for the rest of the game so get cleaned up” he pointed towards the two of you “but not together”
your face got hot and you grabbed the nearest jacket and threw it at him “get out!” he let out a roaring laugh that echoed through the halls until he was gone. shaking you head you sat next to izuku again “the audacity of that man” you mumbled going to open up the first aid kit but he stopped you.
izuku gently grabbed your one hand placing a kiss to your wrist. this made you giggle but you didn’t pull away “what’s with you?”
he then placed a kiss to the back of your hand “i’m just happy he found out. it’s like a weight lifted off my shoulders” you hummed in agreement.
“so what did you tell him?”
the last kiss was placed on your fingers. the fingers that intertwined with his own. the fingers that held his face every time you wanted his attention. the fingers that soon would be accented with a beautiful wedding ring.
“the truth”
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inhuman-obey-me · 1 year
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If the devs do this right for once, and we actually make it to the end of NB story-wise, do you think we'll actually get to go back to our real timeline and meet the og brothers again? As much as I love the time travel premise of NB and these past!brothers, I really do miss our dorks from the present and hope MC isn't stuck there permanently. I need emotional closure after getting ripped away from them so suddenly, damn it. At the very least, a hard mode story update on the others would be nice.
Hahaha...if the devs do it right, for once.
(Loooooong rant & ramble under the cut)
That said, we should be returning, yes. If nothing else, the devs did promise in their pre-release AMA that "the story from lesson 80 will eventually continue in Nightbringer" so we're pretty sure that means we will return to the present...eventually being the operative word. Whether that means the current situation will get wrapped up neatly at the end of NB Season 1 haha OM wrapping up a season neatly? and then plop us back to normal time for Season 2 to continue as a figurative "lesson 81", or if it's going to take a full 4 more seasons to get there, who knows! ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ But eventually they have promised that the story will pick back up, so that should mean that we are not stuck in the past permanently.
Now, there's a few caveats to this -- the biggest of which may be that it's wildly unclear if they're going to follow through on an "alternate universes" approach to the current time travel, where the situation as it left off is untouched, as Nightbringer seemed to imply when he called this time a "world", or if they will do the "time paradox" singular timeline approach as Solomon warned us about. We personally are going to interpret it as the former until proven otherwise, but it's hard to declare it for sure, as both have been mentioned.
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That also means two different things for how things could go.
If it's a single timeline, then it seems clear we have already wildly changed the past with our presence, and we may return to find that things in our own time will be a different as a result. We did mention before that Nightbringer seems like a soft reset to the story because they wrote themselves into a bit of a corner with Season 4, and they could use this to retcon some of the more immediate directions they took and change course. Or, they could perhaps use it to introduce new problems which would set them up for things to solve in future seasons? And if things are changed, then we may end up with an unsatisfying version of returning where it still feels a bit off from the continuation we've all been waiting for.
That brings us to the other option -- alternate universes. This can just be an entirely different universe and timeline, which will have no impact on our own time, and we could return to things as they were and pick up from there. Now, the devs did emphasize that NB is meant to be welcoming and playable for new players as well as players of the original, which...probably means at least that they would have to explain a lot of things all over again? Though they haven't explained a lot of shit to new players, like the whole MC having the Ring of Light thing, so it's not like they're especially doing a great job of that! BUT, personally we really prefer this explanation.
First off, having them be entirely separate would really help to explain things like, again, Luke's many-millenia-early visit to the Devildom. And more than that, it seems like it could fit really well into where the story conflict is setting up to go: MC being presented a choice of siding with humans vs demons.
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Solomon, in Lesson 9-A, is presented with what is later revealed to be a test by Nightbringer, and there's some key wording in that test about what demons offer.
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And what has Nightbringer been saying? That they can bring MC to where they will be happy. "A place that will bring you more joy than any other."
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We know that he had wanted Solomon to choose his side, and that Solomon opted to reject both angels and demons to choose humans instead. His big question to Solomon, then, is what MC's feelings are -- although Solomon says that MC agrees, Nightbringer questions if he really knows how MC feels.
That brings up the interesting possibility that, if this world represents a demon (Nightbringer) leading a human (MC) to "happiness", then MC's original timeline could be the option that represents "choosing humanity" instead. If so, this could be a big test from Nightbringer to see how MC feels, just like he tested Solomon, and it could all culminate in a big decision where MC might be torn between choosing this world or the original one -- though, technically speaking, it realistically probably can't actually branch the story drastically, just coding-wise. But even so, it's possible that, like Season 2 with the dagger, they could still give us the option, and hey, that'd be some pretty interesting storytelling if that's the case!
However, that's all just guessing and speculation. More than anything, we simply do not know Nightbringer's intentions as of yet.
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It seems as though he may genuinely mean it when he says this is "what will bring us happiness," but he also mentioned that having us make the pacts here in past is what he wants as well. What does that mean for what his own goals are? Why does he want that? And considering that the whole reason we even want to make the pacts in this timeline is so that we'll have the ability to return to our time, it's pretty suspicious to use that to say we "want the same thing" as him. So we do not trust Nightbringer right now, but we don't have enough information as of yet and we'll just have to see what direction this is going to go.
As for a hard mode story update on our boys of the original time, though...unfortunately, we wouldn't hold our breath. There's a lot of really big stuff going on thematically in this past time we're currently in, and they likely won't want to distract from that with a jump to the present unless they're trying to make a point. If it does go towards a "MC has to choose between worlds" thing, there might be a slim possibility of it, just to give us a peek at the other option. However, again, the devs have stated that they wanted to make NB accessible to new players as well as fans of the original game, so we think it's pretty unlikely for us to get a story glimpse of them just for us to get to see how the characters as we knew and loved them actually are.
Also, the whole "MC misses their home and needs to make these pacts because they can't see their versions of the characters until they get back" probably hits a little harder if we really actually can't know how they're doing without us but that rests on the basis of narrative design, which Solmare clearly doesn't believe in, with the whole Ruri Tunes theming and all the backgrounds so far. And then there's the whole possibility that the entire concept of time travel means we may get returned just minutes after our disappearance or something, and that time isn't actually passing for them.......time travel is too frickin' complicated, y'all.
Anyway, all this to say, as much as we are totally loving all the new lore and theming and stuff we're getting in Nightbringer, we miss our OG boys too. Hopefully we'll get back to our original time someday.
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absolutebl · 2 years
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Hello! I am looking for a few good bl to binge!
As a gay man myself, I really like it to have truly good chemistry...some bls I watch the chemistry is ZERO and then there is not a good plotline to back it up either.
I like cute stuff...I like dark stuff...
I really liked Cherry Magic, Manner of Death, KinnPorsche, Kieta Hatsukoi, Seven Days (my first and favourite bl) , The Cornered Mouse Dreams of Cheese (that one hurt tho).
Any recomendations?
Hello!!! (I feel you on Cornered Mouse) and I am so happy to find another Seven Days stan. 
10 GREAT Chemistry BLs to Binge right NOW!
For the gays who can sniff a fake a mile away. I notice a decided lack of Taiwan on your list. Is that intentional? Do you not like their style? You're probubly right to avoid Korea. Still a few show up on my list but let’s start with... 
JAPAN 
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1. Old Fashion Cupcake (2022 - Viki)
It’s about a younger man with a long cherished crush on his boss (ten years older and going through a mid life crisis) who decides to save and seduce said boss with pancakes. It’s wholesome, comforting, sexy, and a very necessary narrative about still having hope, interests, and openness to affection at any age. It’s coming of age/queerness packaged in a subtle critique of expectations around masculinity and love and loneliness... and it’s beautiful. Full review.
Seriously GO WATCH IT, thank me later.
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2. My Beautiful Man AKA Utsukushii Kare (2021 - GaGa) 
You said you didn't mind a little dark, trust me on this one: the weird obsessive stalker angst will absolutely be resolved in the best way possible. You liked Seven Days so you don’t mind some traditional yaoi nonsense. This BL has the single greatest final episode of any I have seen since... honestly I can't remember when. It's brilliant.
One of the most Japanese BLs to release in the last decade, as weird and as messed up as any 2000′s yaoi: emo af and hella warped, entirely true to itself with no attempt made to modify its POV for modern sensibilities or current BL fandom. It used seriously old school problematic and kinky tropes, like whipping boy, for a truly uncompromising piece that also manages to hit up themes of communication, consent, and self acceptance. It’s a wonderful BL but uniquely dirty and harsh, in the best possible way - Japanese cinema, uncompromising. Full review of me losing my mind. 
This show won the Grand Prix “My Best TV Award” at the 16th Galaxy Awards.
TAIWAN 
Okay so the problem with the Taiwanese stuff, in general, is not chemistry but story. They are all over the place with story. And they can go very very VERY sappy.
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3. We Best Love 1 (No. 1 For You) & 2 (Fighting Mr. 2nd) (2021 - WeTV) 
Brilliant acting saved this show from a messy (pretty classically manga) narrative with a lot of angst. You have to buy in to a yaoi aesthetic with this one, accept that things move fast and occasionally confuse, but that everything will be okay. It’s the ultimate pining seme meets the ultimate tsundere uke. WBL successfully manages to combine the best elements of Korean, Thai, and Japanese BL as it exists right now. Couple that to the insane chemistry from the leads, and we have one of the greatest BLs of all time, cooking higher heat to a recipe I doubt anyone else will ever be able to replicate since only Taiwan is this flexible.
Like Seven Days I think the two parts exist together and should be watched as a pair. Unfortunately, to do so legally you need to join WeTV. I am considering doing this just to gank a clean copy of season 2, but... that’s neither here no there. You can watch season 1 for free in most territories, but you’ll need to go grey for 2 and 2 has some of the best acting and best chemistry I have EVER seen in a BL. It’s is brilliant. It’s all the leads though.  SamYu are magic, you can see why the internet lost its collective mind over them. 
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4. Be Loved In House: I Do (2021 Viki) 
A cute classy office set BL with a few plot raised eyebrows, but no other concerns. ALL THE TROPES plus a general sweet softness that’s pretty rare from Taiwan, who usually prefer to go hard.
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5. DNA Says Love You (2022 GaGa) 
An under appreciated gem. It’s a bit challenging to suffer through the paranormal investigators plot line, but at least it HAS a plot? When Amber enters the narrative he is so luminous it’s hard to tear your eyes away and the chemistry is on point with both couples (one LTR, one just starting out). DNA deserves extra marks for an upbeat approach to a queer story arc that other shows have systemically mishandled with sadness (in the guise of realism). There is a twist, which I found predictable, but knowing what would happen didn't spoil this show. The leads are engaging, and it’s full of queer found family representation and an unexpected amount of domesticity, plus it’s Taiwan, so the kisses are great. The last few eps really are special and life/love affirming - and the ending is big-grin charming. Full review. 
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6. HIStory 2: Crossing the Line (2018 Viki) 
Taiwan’s best example of classic BL with a sports romance foundation using some of the most prototypical (but fortunately least offensive) yaoi tropes. One of my first and still favorites from Taiwan. Kinda like the Seven Days of Taiwanese BL, everything is on point and very yaoi. (You might consider the companion piece too, Right or Wrong. It’s rougher going but very formative for BL + marriage equality.) 
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7. HIStory 3: Trapped (2019 Viki) 
If you don’t mind a bit of a shaky ending, everything else about this show is good. It has great plot, fantastic characters, and really excellent chemistry form both couples. Also FINE arse suits. If you liked KinnPorsche and want more Mafia BL with high heat it’s this one, Long Time No See, and Manner of Death. 
Basically this is the definition of enemies to lovers. This is a cop + the mafia man he is chasing but WAIT: they fall in love. Added bonus side couple = assassin and nerd cop ALSO falling in love. It’s great. All the leads are stellar. Its high heat, fun action, and a bit of a mystery drama but pretty about all of it. My only warning is that the main couple doesn’t entirely end up together, it’s implied, but... amorphous ending. 
KOREA 
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8. Semantic Error (2022 Viki) 
You might give this one a try. For Korea it’s some of the best chemistry the traditional studios have managed. And it is flawless BL. Truly, perfection for the genre. Korea hit it entirely out of the Parks with Semantic Error by doing a university set BL featuring everything we expect from BL just done exactly right. It has Korea's signature quality executed perfectly, and added bonus good story, great pacing, stunning visuals, and fantastic chemistry. You cannot ask for more from a BL, let alone a KBL. Full review. 
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9. To My Star (2021 Viki)
It’s is a touch quirky to get into, but utterly charming once it hits its stride. This is the ultimate grumpy/sunshine pairing plus the most appealing light-filled kitchen of our dreams. If you can wade through the dead fish kisses there is massive pay out at the end. There is a second season of PAIN, but it has more great chemistry. Up to you if you wanna wade in, but if you don’t mind messy.... (Full review includes my reservations about season 2.) 
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10. Some More (2018 GaGa) 
My last pick from Korea, this one is a Strongberry short, and it is SO very gay. About a city boy on a bike tour who gets injured and rescued by a taciturn, but (as it turns out) quite gay, farmer. Age gap, country mouse/city mouse, SO CUTE. Just too short.
Some other ones that are a bit more... complex? 
These will be chewy and more work to watch, like Cornered Mouse.
Long Time No See (2017 Strongberry GaGa)  - One of Strongberry’s few longer pieces and I don’t think this is strictly BL. It’s about assassins on either side of a terf war who fall in love not knowing they are on opposite sides. Or do they? Good fight sequences, mature characters, high heat, very suspenseful, AND an HEA. If you like KinnPorsche you will LOVE this show. 
Blueming (2022 iQIyI) - It’s a tiny bit dark and a tiny bit bittersweet, almost too honest to a university experience and first love for BL. I wasn’t into it at first, but the leads are solid and by ep 5 it got really good, becoming a narrative about self discovery meets understanding and accepting others people’s flaws without hurting them. Ultimately we witnessed two characters maturing because of each other and their mutual affection, without that affection becoming the conflict point. Instead, tension was built around other aspects of identity, popularity, and self-worth. While production values were a touch lower than usual for Korea, Blueming included decent kisses and other forms of intimacy and a satisfying ending plus there’s judicious and very elegant use of tropes, (which is expected for Korea). 
HIStory 3: Make Our Days Count AKA The BL That Shall Not Be Named) (2019 Viki) - Some of the best BL and best chemistry ever put on screen. Up until they move into together. Seriously, the moment they do, stop watching. Save yourself. 
Plus and Minus (2022 Viki) - There is something off bout this show that I can’t put my finger on. I liked it but... the separation is forced and it could have ben a lot shorter. Chemistry is good though. It’s about codependent besties of 20 years finding their way into a romantic relationship. A bit cheesy, with lots of domesticity and occasional dumb drama. (But gay boys and chaos bis? What can ya do?) It’s not groundbreaking but it is a solid sweet unassuming little show of a style that is perhaps a bit more Thai than it is Taiwanese but I’m okay with that. 
His the movie (2020 Viki) - His is about being a grown adult and still struggling with coming out as gay. It addresses the consequences of life choices disingenuous to identity. Nagisa turns up on Shun’s doorstep with his precocious daughter in tow. This is a touch confusing to Shun since they were each others first love. Shun has retreated from society, rejecting the world before it can reject him, already brokenhearted because without Nagisa he never had a reason to fight. Nagisa went the opposite way, tried to pretend to be something he was not and ended up with a daughter he adores and a wife who hates him. This movie is beautiful and the setting is unique and interesting but I'm not wild about the ending. Moody arthouse smackdoodle is going to pretend that "ambiguous" is somehow unique and special rather than bog standard commonplace for narratives of this type. Honestly, I think I mostly liked this because I have a mad crush on Miyazawa Hio (Shun).
The Pornographer series, specifically the first one AKA The Novelist. (2018 Viki maybe) - emotional manipulation, cheating, obsession, seduction, May/December (age gap AKA younger/older), kink, touch of necrophilia, and explicit. It’s your party you cna watch if you wanna. 
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Okay, what about Thailand? 
You don’t name many from Thailand (Just KP & MoD) which is the juggernaut  of BL and this is... telling. 
Thailand can excel at chemistry, but since they are pretty married to seme/uke they aren’t very “actually” gay. If you know what I mean? Also there is a common thread, especially with the pulps, where side couples have more and better chemistry than the leads. 
That said here are a few Thai BLs with great lead pairs that you might try... 
Bad Buddy (2022 YouTube) - I would be remiss if I didn’t mention this one. This was GMMTV’s flagship BL and it started 2022 on a BANG (okay no actual banging but you know what I mean), starring heavy hitters Ohm & Nanon in a pitch perfect university Romeo & Romeo masterpiece that will give you domesticity meets pain whiplash throughout and jet lag at the end. Some of the friendship and family dynamics are overworked, but it has great production values, killer acting, and some conscious effort to correct for half a decade of Thai BL’s anti-queer mistakes. Full review.
Dark Blue Kiss (2019 YouTube) - this one is a buy in to get familiar with the characters (I have a  how to watch guide here). But PeteKao are worth it. They are an LTR, but it’s on point. This is classic Thai BL with a university setting, great acting and complex characters, one of my favorite friendship groups, friends to enemies to lovers to enemies to lovers, multiple angsty af coming outs, including a long stretch of a secret relationship. High production values, good chemistry, BL side couple, not much queer rep, but lots of classic tropes and some great domesticity.
Dear Doctor, I’m Coming For Your Soul (2022 iQIYI) - This is a romance between a doctor trying to save his patients and a reaper who is both his enemy and (eventual) lover. Basically it’s the genius premise of a gay Doom at Your Service. High concept looks good on you, Thailand. It’s lovely to see KarnNat back on screen together and they are still great, and Karn is just painfully beautiful. Full review.  
Love By Chance (2018 YouTube & Viki) - of all the ones I put on this list I dithered over this one the most. The physical chemistry is a little off but the emotional and romantic thread between these two is truly remarkable. And if you think of Ae as Demi, it works. I love these two so much, I might not be sufficiently objective though. (MAME warning) AePete’s meet cute is one of the best ever put on screen. They are just so genuine and soft with each other, it’s hard not to love them from the first moment. Many of the side couples are... difficult, but you can’t fault the leads. They will remain in your heart a really long time. Now there is some abusive ex action, but it’s victoriously dealt with by our tiny crass love muffin hero.
Lovely Writer (2021 YouTube) - Thailand criticizes itself and the BL industry while simultaneously giving us classic seme/uke with great chemistry in a one-two punch of “we love it, but are we supposed to? and must we think this hard, yet enjoy it SO MUCH?“ This show won’t appeal or make sense to those who don’t already have at least some Thai BL watching experience. What Lovely Writer does, at heart, is reexamine Thai BL has done to queerness, but in a very gentle way that has more to do with Thai BL growing up than any actual queer authenticity. It’s not parody or pastiche, but it is critical and self reflective and trying to correct for some chronic mistakes. Whether it is ultimately successful in this matter is going to depend on the watcher’s relationship to BL and queer identity. But that’s what makes this show beautiful, interesting, and thought provoking. And I, for one, applaud the effort even if I didn’t personally connect to the characters.
Not Me (2022 YouTube) - GMMTV gave us a dark disestablishment narrative (in a time of civil unrest) with established queer award-winning director Anucha and starring the biggest guns of BL OffGun. THIS IS AN AMAZING THING to get to experience in the BL world - nerve racking but remarkable. But was it ACTUALLY BL? It certainly a lot of BL elements, but in the end that’s not what the show was about, or even what it was genuinely trying to be as a performance piece. Still an amazing moment in Thai cinema, certainly worth your time. Don’t worry, it all ends happily. Full review. How good is OffGun’s chemistry, really? I have questions. But you still might like it. (OffGun & The Evolution of Chemistry for a BL Pair) 
6 Thai BLs you suffer through ONLY for the chemistry
Seriously not a lot else to recommend these, but they are master classes in pretty boys kissing. Linked to my reviews when possible. These are mostly on YouTube. 
Cutie Pie 
Love Mechanics (either version) 
Love Stage!!! (the THAI VERSION) 
Secret Crush On You 
Why R U? 
TharnType - honestly this is the beginning of it all, so far as chemistry in Thai BL is concerned. If you want to know how KinnPorsche could even exist in this world, blame the success of this BL and MewGulf in particular. 
I’m not putting any VBL on this list because  the stories are just so incomprehensibly bad, but if you want to try one, do Mr Cinderella. 
So far as Pinoy BL is concerned, My Day is AMAZING on chemistry but also bonkers and very difficult to get hold of these days. 
More on this subject: 
11 BLs with the BEST Chemistry - putting aside heat levels, quality of production, and story
Giving Good Kiss in BL - Defining Chemistry 
Queer lens (from the director) and chemistry (from the actors) in BL 
BL Age Dynamics & CHEMISTRY on screen
HIGH HEAT BL 
(source)
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ilovetheriddler · 5 days
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The Carpal Tunnel Of Love.
(Gotham) Edward Nygma/The Riddler × F!Reader.
(Takes place in between seasons 1 and 2 of Gotham. Also, this is my first ever fanfic. So i hope it's okay!)
Word Count: Slightly over 700.
Contents: Unrequited Feelings, just a small bit of Angst.
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You honestly couldn't begin to even act like you had any clue as to what Edward was currently up to. Hunched over his desk, scribbling away on numerous scraps of paper... Actually, a concerning amount of paper. You pondered to yourself about what he could be writing down in such a gleeful frenzy.
Originally, you assumed that it had to be some new Riddles he had just thought up. But... the look in his eyes made you think it was something else entirely... He glanced up, finally noticing that you were standing in the doorway. He jumped up slightly startled, unintentionally sending his papers flying everywhere.
He quickly tried to gather them all up while attempting to ramble out a greeting to you.
"A-ah! I'm so sorry that I didn't see you standing there!"
You couldn't help but chuckle to yourself, not in a mocking way like numerous other did when it came to Ed, no. In a more amused and friendly way.
"It's fine, Ed. What exactly are you working on there?"
"O-oh! Um.. It's a bit embarrassing to admit, but I'm currently writing a love letter. Well, attempting to that is."
You felt your pulse quicken upon hearing this, You could practically hear your heart beat pounding away in your ears. Is this really it? Is this finally the moment you've been hoping for? When he confesses his love for you? A genuinely large grin crosses your face in excitement.
"Really?! A love letter? That's quite an interesting thing to be working on... If you don't mind me asking, who's it for?"
An embarrassed and goofy grin rests on his face as he scratches his neck. A bit reluctant to actually admit who this letter is for. But ultimately, he concedes and does so.
"Well.... It's for Miss Kringle, I've had feelings for her awhile now and... I think I'm ready to tell her that!"
You felt your heart both briefly stop and shatter upon realizing what he's saying. The letter isn't for you. He doesn't love you. He's in love with Kristen Kringle.... Oh. Of course he is... you attempt to put up a front of being happy and supportive of him. A fake smile is present on your face.
"R-really? I'm... really happy for you, Ed. You deserve to have someone love you as much as you love them. I hope it goes well for you when you tell her..."
"Thank you... I um... sure hope it does. So anyway, what are you doing down here at the GCPD?"
You felt your face heat up slightly once he inquired about why you were here. You sigh and pull an envelope from your bag, Handing it to him. He looks a bit surprised and confused as to what it's meant to be.
"Open it.... I made it just for you."
"Hmm? Really? Well, alright then. Thank you!"
He tears open the envelope and pulls the card out. It was a clearly handmade card. He opens it and sees the writing on the inside that reads, "You may have a lot of me, but you'll never have enough. There will be no more after the last one arrives. What am i?". A soft chuckle escapes his lips.
"A... Riddle?.... Birthdays, the answer is Birthdays."
"That's right.... Happy birthday, Ed...."
His eyes go wide once he realizes what today is. It's his birthday. He'd been so caught up with preparing everything to be perfect when he confessed to Kristen that it had totally slipped his mind that it was today. After a few seconds, a genuine and wide grin crosses his face.
"You remembered my birthday? Wow um... I don't know what to say, Thank you..."
"We've been friends for two years now, Ed, i couldn't forget your birthday even if I tried."
"Well... Thank you! I really appreciate that you'd go through all the trouble of making me a card. It really means a lot to me that I have a friend who cares as much as you do!"
A friend. That's... unfortunately, all you'd ever be to Edward, you feared. But, a part of you honestly didn't mind. As long as you were able to be by his side and be a part of his life... then I'd be worth it to you. Even if it did tear you apart inside each night that he would never return your feelings, or at least that's what you believed and you weren't willing to risk telling him, especially not now that you knew about his feelings for Kristen Kringle.
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hopetorun · 1 year
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"nights like these" for the meme!
before i dive into this, some notes: (1) this actually isn't something i would write because i do not feel like i have a read on one of the main characters or the vibes of the 2013-2022 florida panthers. (2) i'm so sorry if you personally aren't into this. (3) it got away from me so much of it is under a cut
anyway here is the story: it's september of 2022 in fort lauderdale, florida. florida panthers summer blockbuster acquisition matthew tkachuk is happy, and thriving, and ready to succeed in his new home, where he'll wear shorts and loafer mules 365 days a year. he has a great house that cost him basically his whole signing bonus and enough loved ones eager to visit that he'll never have to be banging around the giant house alone. he already has a sunburn.
there's only one small, small issue: he's 100% heartbroken.
(now for our purposes i don't think leon is the one who broke his heart. i think either johnny -- tragic unrequited love that johnny finally shut down? complicated relationship johnny broke off to flee to ohio? -- or just some guy he was dating who dumps him for some devastating reason that matthew handles with no grace at all internally and with perfect poise externally)
anyway, he's here now. new team. fresh start. he's going to make new friends and fill his life with rich new relationships and not miss what he used to have at all. one of those rich new relationships is going to be with his teammate and captain and definitely soon to be friend sasha barkov. he always wants to make friends but he's especially determined about this one.
what he doesn't know is that sasha is also heartbroken. his boyfriend? fwb? undefined something? jonny huby was up and traded with no warning and also dumped him. (see this is where i don't know enough about the vibes of the 2013-2022 florida panthers)
but sasha is friendly, and he clearly likes matthew, even if he's quiet and, matthew thinks, careful with his heart. but matthew's easy to like, you know? he's upbeat and thoughtful and generous and wants the people he's with to know he cares about them.
they get to know each other slowly, carefully, but still ... with maybe too much intensity. they do both have these major holes in their lives that they're looking for something to fill. late nights sharing a drink or a meal after the game that turn into really late nights, that sometimes turn into very early mornings. the season isn't going great, and they talk about that, but they also talk about their lives and their families and matthew's old team and what they think their current team could be, if they could get everyone healthy at the same time.
slowly, they start to spill about their past relationships, too. the nights don't get shorter. sometimes they crash at each other's places, just because it's easier. matthew likes not clattering around a big house by himself in the morning, likes the noise of sasha cursing under his breath at the fancy espresso machine taryn basically ordered him to buy and the soft murmur of the tv from the other room. it's what he wanted when he bought this big stupid house, to have someone (or many someones, a whole family) to fill it up with.
matthew is the main character of all star weekend, and he feels sasha watching him, and it feels like that has its own weight. every time he makes sasha laugh it feels heavier and more important and harder to think about too much. wanting things is how he got his heart broken in the first place. it's easier if he doesn't.
and then, of course, things start to go well and that makes it even more impossible to look directly at. he can't fuck this up now. can't rock the boat. but the thing between them, big and scary and intense and yet still easy, it's always easy, it felt like slotting into a place he was always meant to be from the beginning -- that thing, that doesn't go away.
matthew doesn't breathe a word of it until they finally lose. (conference final? cup final? is this concept i'm spinning on tumblr gonna get jossed in a month?) sasha comes over, maybe a day or two later, and they drink beers outside and nearly get caught by a thunderstorm and matthew kisses him while the rain beats against the windows and sasha doesn't sleep in the guest room that night
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I decided that the future looked too bleak for the Starstrike incident au, so here's so fluff as I work on the pain. Then, it's a downward spiral from here
Kade wasn't expecting to scare them.
He had just wanted to say hi, that's all.
He took a left and found the staircase hidden in a corner, the Not An Exit sign. The only indicator class 2 of the Rescue Bots Academy was even there. Kade thought it was odd that the children were always so quiet when they were brought into town. No one ever tried to sneak away or talk to anyone outside their minders, and the occasional hushed whisper to the bot next to them.
Kade brought a duffle bag with a few big stuffed toys in vacuum sealed bag inside it. He knew they didn't have much, and class 1 seemed to like having something to hold when studying. Kade ended up so wrapped up in what he might have to say to get them to understand what the toy's were, that he forgot to be careful, swinging open the hydraulic assisted door with a carefree push.
Kade immediately felt at least six pairs of piercing eyes cut through the common room, pining him to where he stood.
This wasn't class 1.
They were scared of him.
Kade took the bag off his shoulder, not looking away as the young bots shook off the urge to freeze for dropping whatever they were doing and staring a Kade. At least two of them looked about ready to bolt.
"Hey, hey, I'm sorry. I didn't think this through, waltzing into your safe space without knocking or at least talking with Heatwave first. I'm Kade, I am a firefighter who has worked on the island for almost ten years. I moved away to train more human firefighters, and when I heard you guys have been through a lot, and you aren't the first set of kids I have known that's lost everything, so, I had some bot friends of mine make you something to hold onto. They are in bags currently, and they will fluff up once you take them out. They are very durable and soft. I am gonna go now, I can see that I am making you guys uncomfortable. Again, I am so, so sorry forehat happened. See you around." Kade left, closing the door behind him softly.
Starstrike grabbed a book off the coffee table and poked the bag. When it wasn't, in fact, a hidden grenade, she opened it up and took out flattened, clear plastic wrapped packages, the contents a pastel rainbow, with a few different tans thrown in there. She opened the first one, finding a yellow bunny, its fur softer than anything she had felt before. She hugged it, then remembered not only her doll, but the other students. She dragged the bag over, a nagging feeling in her spark whispering that the bag could still explode, still infect, still -
The bunny was big enough that she could unpick the seam on its belly and have a romper for when winter comes.
A little, ancient part of Starstrike hated the inevitable change of seasons.
Then, keeping her baby the doll warm will be more and more tiresome. Is that what they wanted? Her to be so busy with her baby school that she couldn't argue or help her flock?
It was working.
Now, the rest of the week will be devoted to stealing thread and hiding removed fluff.
At least her flock family was happy.
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lesbianlotties · 6 months
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20 questions for fic writers
thanks for tagging me @lilolilyr !! ily <33
1. How many works do you have on ao3?
120 works!
2. What’s your total ao3 word count?
oh i didn't want to be outed on this but... 1,262,993
3. What fandoms do you write for?
i have written for 18 fandoms! currently i'm only writing for yellowjackets. but i might write more for ronance, i could update the warrior nun fic. and who knows, maybe a new season/movie will get me writing wednesday and the old guard again!
4. What are your top five fics by kudos?
Aftermath Kudos: 3,605 - aka "holy shit a lot of people were reading wednesday fanfic huh??"
make my menace into someone you'd adore Kudos: 2,179 - ronance coworkers enemies to lovers my beloved!
through the grief can't fight the feeling of relief Kudos: 1,381 - very soft warrior nun fic
five times Deena and Sam met in secret (and one time they didn’t)  Kudos: 1,154 - ngl i didn't think fear street fics got these many kudos but this was a lovely time!
Elvis cloned by aliens (you never know...) Kudos: 912 - it's literally insane to me that a one shot got this many kudos! (let's get it to 1k? 👀)
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
yes!! i think like 99% of the time. i just love it so much. i love saying thank u because i'm genuinely SO thankful for every comment. and i have a feeling if i reply it might inspire people to leave more comments. and also sometimes it's a chance to just talk more about the fic! which i love doing, there's nothing like getting to talk about it
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
hmmm i don't love writing angsty endings, as you'll see by the fact that i wrote these two super angsty endings and then i went and wrote a sequel/alternate ending for both ghsjfdghkdfjg but anyway there's:
I'm sorry (it should've been me) - nancy tells robin she loves her but she's too late (in the rain)
If I could hold you for a minute (darling, I'd go through it again) - laura lee reincarnated as the bear and you know what happened to it
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
oh most of them lmao hmm i think i’m going to go for these “everyone survived post canon and they move in together to be happy and heal as a family” Extremely Uneventful Subject for tog and Who would I be without you, without them? for yellowjackets
8. Do you get hate on fic?
hmmm no i think that’s never happened! the closest thing might have been someone suggesting i always killed certain character when it’s the entire opposite. or the funny alternative, when someone literally only mentioned the men in the background of the story in every single comment they left lol but even those were mostly nice comments!
9. Do you write smut?
i do yes! not much and i only yielded and started writing it recently but i’ve loved it so far lol four of my most popular yj fics are smut, one of them is one of my favorites ever, and there’s that one ronance fic i posted on anon first… iykyk
10. Do you write crossovers?
i’ve done two! Immortals and Librarians for tog and gunpowder milkshake and (Red) Room For 8 for ocean’s 8 and hill house
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
not that i know of!! hopefuly not
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
yes! 【翻译】Being with you (Makes the flame burn good) by R_H_Felidae_Athena
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
i have tried but they haven’t been posted/finished yet :(
14. What’s your all-time favourite ship?
okay so that’s a Tough question. judging by amount of fic written it’s robin and nancy, my current favorite is lottie and laura lee, but i also just rewatched bly manor and let me tell you, there’s no one at the level of dani and jamie <3
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but probably won’t?
there’s too many 😭 going as far back as the ocean’s 8 days there's the haunted house one, then fear street enemies to lovers, my warrior nun fic, yellowjackets coffee shop au, and all the ideas i haven’t even started ghsjfdghjf
16. What are your writing strengths?
oh don't do this to me. i literally never know what to reply to this. i... well i'd like to think i'm good at characterization and maybe dialogue!
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
hmm i think i have a serious lack of discipline that means i only write when the mood is right and i will never stick to a schedule or plan or routine lol and okay i'll admit it, i might be too lazy to do the research necessary to write certain things/stories so i just avoid them 😭 but in my defense it's because too much research for academic reasons made me allergic to it
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
hm. i did this somewhat regularly with the old guard and in one ronance fic but looking back i don’t love it very much, it’s just okay i guess. this is just for me personally!
19. First fandom you wrote for?
ocean’s 8 hgsjdfghjf closely followed by the haunting of hill house
20. Favourite fic you’ve written?
VERY very tough question!! they’re all my babies and i couldn’t possibly pick any fav- actually i have a few! but i’ll keep it to 3 special ones that funnily enough are far from being my most popular ones (pls read them i worked so so hard on them)
God's very simple and love shouldn't burn - aka my lottielee manifesto! 
If you rewrite your life, may I still play a part? - stranger things, nancy wheeler choose your own adventure fic!
my heart (is like a haunted house) - tog, andy falls in love with quynh’s ghost
tagging: @natscatorrcio @dufrau @eskawrites @scorchedhearth @sapphicscience @yee-hawlw @reesesfastbreak (if you want to! no pressure!) and pls pls anyone that sees this and wants to share say i tagged u!
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loxare · 10 months
Text
Good omens 2 ep 1 thots under the cut!
CROWLEY LOOKS!!! SO HAPPY!!!!!! MAKING HIS NEBULA!!!!!!!!! I'm so sad he got the wind taken out of his sails. And I know exactly how much trouble he got in just for asking a few questions. Theory: God is omniscient, and as such knew Crowley needed to be a demon to save the Earth. It sucks, but it's growth for both him and Aziraphale, who needed to learn to duck around the rules, and growth tends to hurt. I'm just sad Crowley got hit that hard
Aziraphale only valid landlord???
Crowley ornithologist?????
Wait, why is the mail getting delivered to the Bentley rather than Crowley's apartment? What happened to his plants? Is he just never in his apartment so it's better to deliver to the car?
Record shop coffee shop ff slow burn
John Hamm's john & hamms are on display
This is unrelated to GO but I made wonton soup to eat while watching this and it is very good. Mmmm
Those poor tomatoes
Aziraphale's music interrupted by nudity and amnesia
Oh god heaven still hurts my eye holes. So shiny
No one tell naked amnesiac Gabriel about the existence of twins
Someone get him some pants. Aziraphale please get him some pants not just a blanket. What if he stands up?
Trailer ship bait line is a good line. Aziraphale thinks of Crowley and goes all soft
"The thing" is probably the box that was doing a lot of heavy lifting to keep this show PG, that was also dropped when the door opened and left in the street. Someone should probably go pick that up before someone else takes it
Ah. Good, it's still there
Oh her name is Shax. Neat! I love Crowley's hair swirlies. The ones on top. They're nice
Gabriel's Jim's terrible short term memory will absolutely be remembering Gabriel and not retaining anything else
The reaction to a bit of litter in heaven is killing me
So Crowley is one of those coffee drinkers. Also, if I were the record shop lady, I'd bake Aziraphale a thank you cake
Getting tired of writing out all the names, sk they're just A and C now
Oh no, the coffee shop lady is taken. Poor record shop lady
Blanket toga is not a substitute for clothes
I thought "ask him properly" would lead to some magic angel stuff, not asking more aggressively
ARGUMENTS. I feel like A is playing on the time last season when C left, saying he was going to go to another galaxy (Andromeda?) and then ended up regretting that. To clarify, I'm currently paused so I haven't heard C's response yet so this entire paragraph could become moot
I feel like C's going through some stuff that he hasn't told A about
Man drinks six shots of espresso, spontaneously combusts, gets struck by lightning
The relationship and circumstances around these two shop keepers is so fanfiction. If they don't get together, I hope they can spend the time trapped in this coffee shop bonding and becoming besties. Also, there should be a manual override for the security system. Not having one is stupid, because of things like this. What if they were trapped in the record shop instead, and there was no readily available food? An internal manual override is crucial
I like Micheal's sleeve cuffs
Ooo, disabled angel!
Muriel I hope you get some confidence. And also I want your skirt
Small bit of litter confuses and confounds angels
Oh, wonder why Beelzebub got recast. (Don't go out of your way to look it up I don't care enough to check myself and definitely not enough to inconvenience someone else)
So. The conflict here is that C could give up Jim, get a promotion and that's a problem taken off his hands, but A would be mad at him. Or, he could do not that and risk both him and A getting erased from existence entirely, which will uh, make it so the apocalypse last season did not get stopped. Oh boy
Oh this coffee shop lady does not care for records. At all
Crowley "my bad" actually made me die laughing so that was excellent and also my ghost is now typing this
Oh I do not care for the tone of Lindsay's texts. At all. Nina you deserve better. I do like the format of the texts coming up though. The paper and red pen makes it seem a lot more personal and angry and uh. Not good.
One of those said "remember what we said about mutual respect" and blowing up your partner's phone angrily because they're late isn't respect, which is necessary in the "mutual" bit of mutual respect. I would personally be concerned that something had happened. Maybe walk down and see if they're alright. Assume that their phone had died maybe, idk
A: glasses on. C: glasses off
"You were right" does not contain the word sorry and oh good, A knows that. Oh there's a dance? 👀
Why. Why do they do that. This is hilarious, but I feel like it makes it more difficult to apologize for things if there's a humiliating dance involved. Which also still doesn't contain the word sorry
Jim go back upstairs. Also, why does he still not have clothes?
See, in the trailer, Muriel didn't recognize Gabriel, and I thought that was just because they've never met. Interesting to see that, no, there's an active reason for that
Being persona non grata with heaven means A isn't allowed to do miracles anymore? Or just that the miracles he does are more heavily scrutinized?
Ah, the old "immediate proof that the last thing said was completely wrong" trope. Also, weird seeing heaven with a red filter
Ah. Bit of warning for people sensitive to flashing lights. I don't think this flashes fast enough, it's a hard cut between red filtered heaven and white heaven, with a second or two between each cut. But like. Go carefully. It only lasts for a bit and there aren't too many interesting visuals during it. Right after C says "no one will have noticed a thing", stops when Uriel asks for the alarm to stop
Oh A. Can't stay out of trouble to save his life
All in all, I liked it a lot! I'm looking forward to the hijinks A&C get into, I really want to know why C's mood is so foul rn when he was generally cheery at the end of last season, or as cheery as he gets, wondering about all the empty boxes. One empty box is fine, but two? Suspicious. Hoping Nina dumps Lindsay, has a nice long recovery period where she can enjoy being herself, and then gets together with record shop lady, whose name I will remember sometime probably. But I'm out of soup, out of tea, and out of excuses to not pull nails from my wall, so I'm gonna go do that now
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differentlyweird · 2 years
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Okay so as a former Rini, and a Portwell Stan I have to get this out in the open. Here’s what I think of the three main ships in the show so far.
1. Rini breaking up for good was honestly the best thing for both characters. Of course their journey throughout season one is very important, especially they way it ended. It showed that Ricky had grown and changed and is now able to express his emotions. if I’m being honest I thought that they were going to be endgame but looking back their development from the very first episode to when they break up it is very prominent both individually and together that they wanted different things and were faced with different opportunities. In the end they needed to let go because they were holding each other back from the people they were growing into.We see the chemistry, love,and friendship these two have. We see them grow and change constantly, unfortunately they just grew apart while on their individual journeys but I don’t feel as though their storyline wasn’t finished. I feel very happy about where they currently are.
2. Rina - in preparation for season three I went back and watched season one and two back to back. I can admit where the building for this ship began in season one. It’s had a steady growth and even though it’s been rocky you can see where Ricky and Gina are growing and changing. You can also see the different highs and lows of their relationship, and I will admit I definitely see the potential and the appeal in this couple. You see their understanding of each other and their respective situations. As well as an understanding of each other as outsiders. I think their friendship is beautiful and their connection is deep.Usually I go for ships like this one. These are usually the ones that I want to watch and root for but for some reason I don’t want to do that in this case. I just feel that with where the characters are I don’t think that they would fit well in a long-term relationship not to say that they wouldn’t fit well in a relationship at all it’s just that I don’t see longevity. Again this is new for me because typically I do root for couples like this. I just feel like they’re never on the same page in terms of the feelings for each other romantically. I’ll admit I shipped them in season one but I just feel like they are hurting each other more in the process of their friendship knowing that they have feelings for each other but never on the same page.
Portwell - like I said I usually root for ships like rina,
So when I started shipping portwell it was all very new to me. You don’t really see the antagonists (i’m referring to EJ and Gina in season one, also antagonist is used very very loosely) end up together much less grow and open up to each other. I have loved Gina from the start but I hated EJ in season 1. Then in season 2 we see Gina learning to trust people and EJ doing better after atoning for his wrongdoings. They have this very natural easy-going dynamic even from season one when they didn’t like each other and just wanted to get the leads in the play. They have been a team since season one and in season two we see their friendship start to blossom. It was really refreshing to see a storyline done like this because usually we see 1/2 of the ex antagonist either end up with one of the main protagonist or just end up dropping their “partner in crime”. So to see EJ and Gina not only improve in all aspects of their character but to become friends who understands a part of each other that is really hard to explain and understand to anyone else. I feel that they provided kindness, softness, and acceptance that for a lot of relationships that we see in TV shows and movies it’s not framed that way. Usually we see relationships that are hard. Ones that you have to fight through obstacles and pain to obtain. I liked the fact that with portwell it just flowed naturally. It shows that there are different dynamics to relationships they don’t have to involve hardships . Now I’m not crazy I love angst, pinning, and a slowburn as much as the next person. However, that’s not the only way to write an engaging successful couple. Just because theoretically EJ and Gina would have this easy time getting together doesn’t mean that they couldn’t face obstacles and angst and still end up together. It doesn’t mean that they’re boring Just that not every relationship is like that it’s realistic and generally speaking I wish we saw more of it in media.I don’t know they just intrigue me a lot more because their feelings are so pure and their journeys are not typical to what your usual protagonist are like. They have an edge and a past, leading them to be more interesting in their transformations . I think with who the characters are and what they’ve been through portwell feels like a soft love that they both deserve.I know they’re probably going to break up and that Rina is going to be endgame. I just wish that we could’ve seen more of EJ and Gina‘s relationship and development as a couple before that happened. I think they have the potential to be a great long term couple of the show. I think they’re special, maybe it’s because I’m not a teenager anymore but I think that soft relationships like this deserve a chance. But hey sometimes that’s just the way things are and if you ship rina and are happy then who am I to rain on your parade? To my fellow portwell shippers yes they could’ve been done better but at least they were canon for a little bit and we always have Ao3.
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bellewintersroe · 1 year
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USHFJFJF NO WORDS CAN EXPRESS MY JOY FINDING AN ACTIVE BoB BLOG, YOUR WRITING IS AWESOME!
My first time properly requesting a ship (romantic and platonic if that’s possible?) I’ll try my best to keep it concise!
My pronouns are she/her. I have straight, dark black hair that grows a little over my shoulder and dark brown eyes that only shines under really bright light.
I’m an MBTI type INFP, enneagram type 9w1– though on topics of interest I could become highly analytical and slightly more willing to engage in debates.
Though I am an introvert, if I am faced with an unfamiliar environment without knowing anyone, I will initiate conversations with people if they pique my interest (usually I talk to one person, really, I’m pretty reserved still). Initially I’ll usually express curiosity (and soft-spoken to the extreme level, I sorta have anxiety 😭)
I pretty much have a golden retriever energy and am really fond of joking around once I grow fond/smitten with someone. I try my best to actively be open-minded. I also ramble a lot about things I’m interested in, say, a character in a book I finished recently.
My hobbies are drawing, reading, and listening to relaxing music! My favourite season is probably autumn.
I am fluent in 2 languages (English + Vietnamese) and am learning French and German fundamentals.
Currently I am gearing towards biochemistry in general, but if I can, I would love to work in the pharmaceutical field or the medical field, as I enjoy helping people get back on their feet (directly or indirectly I haven’t quite figured out yet).
Thank you for your patience! I sort of went off on my own there for a bit, I hope it’s enough info! 🎉
ahhhhh thank you so much for your request!! I’m so happy there’s so many of you enjoying these! Thank you for the amount of detail in this <3 <3
I ship you with… Warren ‘Skip’ Muck!
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First of all, I feel like Skip would be in complete awe of your eyes. Let’s say you meet one day in Toccoa, it’s a beautiful day, but it gets a whole lot better when this tall, dirty blonde haired man accidentally bumps into you.
he doesn’t do it on purpose, but he’s sooo glad he did, and when he takes a step back to apologise, he’s suddenly lost for words when you’re just gazing back to him all beautiful and your eyes are GLOWING in the Georgian sunlight.
”oh my god have I just bumped into an Angel or?” I don’t think Skip would physically be able to hide his attraction/ crush from you. Even if you were good friends for a while, his feelings would be so obviously out there.
he’d probably recognise how intuitive you are, I feel like Skip can be the same; so when he notices you speaking more often about topics you’re passionate about, he purposefully brings things up to have a debate/ find a way to speak to you.
thinks you’re soooo super duper smart and agrees with you on literally anything. He’s a liberal man, wants to hear your opinions / intuitions on absolutely everything and anybody.
Can tell when you’re a little anxious and supports you through this, cheers you on even if you’re just having a conversation with somebody. “It’s okay, babe, carry on.” Or, “I’m listening, babe.”
Feel like he’d call you babe more than he would your own name. You’re his babe.
So proud of you, shows you off all the time.
‘Yeah well my girl speaks TWO languages, and she’s that smart, she’s gonna save all your sorry arses one day’.
he’s SO proud of you, like the feeling is overwhelming, loves showing you off, talking about you and your accomplishments.
would seriously be your biggest supporter and number 1 cheerleader.
I feel like Skip can’t get enough of you, you’re so smitten and he can see that himself, he loves cuddling and having you to himself when you finally get some alone time.
deffo admires tf out of you, you’d glance down and he’d gaze up to you with this gentle smile and eyes literally sparkling.
the golden retriever energy deffo shows in your relationship, you’re so excited to be with each other, and you both grow that comfortable I feel like you become a pair of weirdos that have all these inside jokes and gags- nobody else understands.
I think you’d be the perfect person to support him after the war (let’s pretend he was just wounded OKAY). He’d need the mental support and you’d offer that endlessly with so much encouragement and understanding.
your curious nature means you’d always get to the bottom of his sadness/ low moods. I doubt they’d last for long though, if you talk to him about something you’re interested in, legit anything at all, he’s smiling like a dork in your direction.
listening to relaxing music together, especially closer towards nighttime / before you go to bed would be such a therapeutic routine for you both.
Probably tries to draw whatever you have/ copy it just because he knows it makes you laugh. He BOTCHES it, even though he’s tried his hardest.
these probably end up on the wall or the fridge and let’s say Luz or someone comes to visit theyd probs be like; “I didn’t know you had kids?! What a shit drawing!!”
its all fun and jokes. Your relationship would be so fun, and so full of consistent love.
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stephanieromanoff · 1 year
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Angel to wispy for the ask game 😘
Oh my 😂 okay
angel; do you have a nickname? I have several. Here people either call me Stephanie or Steph, and irl people call me Be, Beba or Betine.
awe; how old are you? 21.
bloop; spirit animal? I think it’s wolf.
blossom; favorite book/movie/song? Fav movie is Mamma Mia, book is Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo, and song currently is Lift Me Up by Rihanna.
blush; what was your stuffed animal as a child? A bear.
breeze; most precious childhood memory? The day my cousin (who I consider the sister I’ve always wanted to have) was born.
bubbles; do you have a best friend? I do, more than one.
buttercup; showers or baths? Showers.
butterfly; dream destination? Mexico.
buttons; are you religious or spiritual? No.
calm; favorite scent? Home.
candlelight; what did you dream about last night? I have no idea.
charming; have you ever been in love? I don’t think so.’
cozy; eye/hair color? My eyes are dark brown and my hair is currently ginger.
cupcake; favorite flower/plant? I don’t have one.
cute; what did you get on your last birthday? Alcohol and a card.
cutie pie; most precious item you own? My lesbian flag.
cutsie; what makes you happy? Being around people I like.
daisies; describe a moment when you felt free. When I traveled with my cousin.
daydream; how do you want to be remembered? As someone who made a difference.
daylight; favorite album of all time? I don’t have one.
dear; zodiac sign? Scorpio ♏️
delightful; concerts or museums? Concerts
dimples; have you ever written a letter? Yeah
dobby; dream job? Criminal psychologist
doll; how do you like to dress? Stylish and comfortable
dovey; any paranormal/magical experiences? No
dreams; do you want or have any tattoos? I do, 6
drizzle; do you believe in aliens? I believe there’s other beings around the universe
euphoric; talk about someone you love. One of my best friends. She’s been there for me since 7 grade and though we’re very different from each other she’s still like a sister to me
fairy; do you have a pet? I have 2 dogs
fluffy; ocean or mountain? Ocean
forever; where do you feel time stop? Idk
froglet; are you a good plant owner? I don’t really like plants lol
garden; how many languages do you know? 4
gem; who are your favorite tumblrs? You wifey
giggles; what is your aesthetic of choice? I don’t really have one
glittery; do you like anons? why/why not? I like when they’re polite
glow; list the top 5 things you like about yourself. I like my eyes, that I’m always on a good mood, I’m very optimistic, I like my hair and that I’m usually very calm
heart; silk or lace? Lace
honey; coffee or tea? how do you take it? Tea. No milk and no sugar.
hugsy; do you enjoy people watching or bird watching more? why? People watching ig, I’m not really into birds
hunnybunch; what sounds help you sleep? Rain
jewel; what's your favorite kind of weather? Not too hot or too cold and sunny (if I need to leave my house)
jiggly; what do you usually like to do on weekends? Watch movies or shows and hang out with friends
joy; do you laugh loudly or giggle more? I usually giggle
kinky; do you blush easily? Yeah because I’m pale af lol
kisses; what romantic cliché do you wish for most? Having a family with my future wife
kitty; what's your favorite time of the day? Afternoon
ladybug; what's your favorite artist to listen to when you're sad? I don’t have a preference on music when I’m sad
love; what is your favorite season and why? Spring because it’s more beautiful considering the flowers and stuff, and also because my birthday is on spring
lovey; what is your favorite flavor of macaron and ice cream? I don’t really eat macaron, but my favorite ice cream flavor is strawberry
magic; what are five flaws you have? I’m lazy, I procrastinate a lot, I can get angry very easily depending on the person I’m angry at, I get annoyed by people very easily as well and I don’t trust easily
moonlight; do you prefer soft pastels, warm neutrals, or cool darks? Cool darks
munchkin; what do you look for in your significant other? Loyalty and someone who is fun to be around
paddywack; how would you describe a perfect date? With someone I really like doing something I really like
pebbles; how do you spend free time by yourself? Listening to music
precious; what is something valuable that you learned in your life? I have to learn how to say “no” more often. It will definitely save me from uncomfortable situations.
pretty; do you like to cook or bake more? Bake
prince; how would vou describe vour handwriting? I feel like my handwriting is pretty if we’re comparing with kids handwritings, but too childish if we compare with adults
princess; do you play any instruments? if not, are there any you wish you could play? I used to play piano and guitar, and I wish I still played piano and learned how to play drums
prinky; how do you relieve stress? Listening to music
pumpkin; what is your favourite kind of fruit/ vegetable? My favorite fruit is strawberry and I don’t have a favorite vegetable
rainbow what was the last line of the last book you read? I don’t remember
roses; what is the most significant event in your life so far? My high school graduation
smile; what is one thing that has greatly affected you? Figuring out I’m a lesbian
shine; art or music? Music
shimmer; do animals tend to like you? Dogs yes
smitten; do you collect anything? Funko pops
smoochies; how many pillows do you sleep with? 2
snuggle; what is your favourite candy? Brigadeiro
snuggly; do you have a camera? if so, what kind? No
sparkle; do you wear jewelry? Earrings and sometimes a necklace
spooky; sunrise or sunset? Sunset
sprinkles; do you like to listen to music with headphones or no headphones? I prefer without headphones
starlight; what was your favourite show as a child? Wizards of Waverly Place
soft; describe your favourite spot in your house. My bedroom
soothe; digital or vinyl? Digital
squeezed; who do vou miss right now? My friends from uni
sugary; what traits do you value most in friends? The same I value in a romantic partner: loyalty and being fun
sunshine; do you prefer for things to be practical or aesthetically pleasing? Practical
sweet; do you find it easy to open up? It really depends on who I’m opening up to
sweetie; do you like kids? if so, do you ever want to have any? I love kids and I’d love to have some
thimble; is there somebody you look up to? who are they? My mom
toot; what is something you find unique about yourself? That I try to see the positive side of things in every situation
tootsie; what kind of friend are you? I’d say the clumsy one
treasure; what was something that made you smile today? Seeing my favorite cousin
velvet; are you an early bird or a night owl? Early bird
whiffle; if you could have a magical power, what would it be? Teleportation
whimsical; do you prefer doing stuff at home or going out? Doing stuff at home
whiskers; do you usually wear makeup? No
wiggly; are you a messy or tidy person? Tidy
wispy; do you like the place where you grew up? do you think you will live there when you get older? I don’t dislike it, and yeah I’d live here when I get older
Thank you for sending this, wifey 💚
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hobbitsetal · 2 years
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5 Movies, 4 Songs, 3 Essentials, 2 Books, 1 Quote
Tagged by @senadimell; thank you!!
5 MOVIES
In no particular order:
1. The Secret of Kells. The animation, the music, the accents--I am utterly in love with anything by Cartoon Saloon.
2. Song of the Sea. you know what, it gets its own entry, because it's just so darn enchanting. Cartoon Saloon is a gift to the world.
3. The eminently quotable The Princess Bride
4. The Man From Uncle. It's fun, it's classy, it's so sexy and stylish...
5. Hoodwinked. I quote that movie so very much
4 SONGS
1. Bloom, by the Paper Kites. Soft, sweet, yearning (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w4XdnD5c334)
2. Budapest by George Ezra. Not only do I vibe with it, but also it makes me think of Cahan Windlow from my novel (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wQ5k_fvscJk)
3. Subway Song by Julianna Zachariou. It's just cute (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kAIeQY5o8gE)
4. Short Change Hero by the Heavy. Makes me think of my oc Redmond from that stupid unfinished novel, plus it's just good dark n stormy vibes (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9u9ymiSmtXY)
3 ESSENTIALS
3.  Coffee. One, maybe two cups, in the morning~
2. Hugs for my health
1. My fuzzy cardigan, or sunshine, or a space heater, or literally anything to keep me warm and happy
2 BOOKS
Ooh, let's see...most currently? Andrew Peterson's "Adorning the Dark" and Naomi Novik's "Spinning Silver."
1 QUOTE
"The reason that the rich were so rich, Vimes reasoned, was because they managed to spend less money. Take boots, for example. He earned thirty-eight dollars a month plus allowances. A really good pair of leather boots cost fifty dollars. But an affordable pair of boots, which were sort of OK for a season or two and then leaked like hell when the cardboard gave out, cost about ten dollars. Those were the kind of boots Vimes always bought, and wore until the soles were so thin that he could tell where he was in Ankh-Morpork on a foggy night by the feel of the cobbles. But the thing was that good boots lasted for years and years. A man who could afford fifty dollars had a pair of boots that'd still be keeping his feet dry in ten years' time, while a poor man who could only afford cheap boots would have spent a hundred dollars on boots in the same time and would still have wet feet. This was the Captain Samuel Vimes "Boots" theory of socioeconomic unfairness."
~ Sir Terry Pratchett, Men At Arms.
tagging @starwarmth, @thisbibliomaniac, @ofsaltandsmoke, and @rainofarrows!
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twwpress · 2 years
Text
Creator Spotlight: Week 4
Welcome back to our TWW Creator Spotlight! For every spotlight, we’ll ask each featured creator the same ten questions as well as select questions submitted on twitter. This week, we’re chatting with @sapphiccjcregg // jedianniescrambler on ao3. Emma creates lovely fics and edits, and we’re thrilled to feature her this week!
1) What are your top 5 desert island TWW fics?
The Journey of Wells and Roads by kennedygailparker
My absolute favorite fic ever. Post canon, absolutely gorgeous. This is my season eight and no one can convince me otherwise.
https://archiveofourown.org/works/20657867
I hold with those who favor fire by internationalprincess
This was the first Amy/Andy fic I read and it’s just so good. The blueprint honestly.
https://archiveofourown.org/works/146182
 States of Union by Iamsherlocked07
The secret married hurt/comfort of my DREAMS.
https://archiveofourown.org/works/31008557
 summer, highland falls AND extracts, a six act play, and a tango by crossingdelancy 
Everything by crossingdelancy is beautifully written but I especially love these two.
https://archiveofourown.org/works/34995025
https://archiveofourown.org/works/32778259 
2) Do you have a favorite character to write/edit? Favorite ship(s) to write/edit? Are there characters or ships you'd like to write/edit more of?
I love writing Amy Gardner, she’s so funny and I don’t know what this says about me but I feel like it’s really easy to get into her headspace.
CJToby is definitely my favorite tww ship to write for, along with cjandy and abbey/amy, the latter two I always mean to write more of! 
 3) Tell us about your creative process (setup/location? Night or day? Snacks/beverages? Computer/phone/notebook? Music or silence? Anything else you want to share is welcome!)
I don’t really have a set process for fic writing. It usually happens on my phone between doing other things. Sometimes I’ll go to a coffee shop to finish writing a book review and end up procrastinating by writing fic, but that’s as close to an actual process as I get. (And always music over silence!) 
4) What video editing/writing advice do you have for others who may be reading this?
Just write! The only way to get better is to keep doing it, over and over and figuring out what you like and what you don’t like in your writing. Also developing your own voice in storytelling is important, there’s nothing worse in my opinion than a narrative voice that sounds average and mediocre.
 5) From where do you usually draw your inspiration? (Other forms of media, music, tropes, etc?)
Honestly everything? Sometimes it’s songs or random tweets or photos. Most of the time it’s brainstorming with Sam. There’s a trope/kink/au generator I use sometimes when I need that extra kick though. 
 6) What is the fic/edit you've written/created that you're most proud of and why?
still got love for you. I think is my favorite fic I’ve written. I love how it turned out, it just feels so soft and cozy when I reread it. 
https://archiveofourown.org/works/32699131 
 7) What's the fic trope/concept/AU you'd read 1000 of? What's the fic trope/concept/AU you'd write 1000 of? And/or, are there any editing tropes/artists/themes you can't get enough of?
I have a soft spot for marriage of convenience/arranged marriage fics and I would definitely both read and write 1000 fics of that. But looking back at my past posted fics I seem to have written more than one “only one bed” fics haha 
 8) Is there anything you'd like to try writing-wise/video editing-wise that you haven't yet?
Technique wise not really? I’m working on a quasi epistolary fic for another fandom, and it would be kinda fun to write one for tww if I came up with the right plot to suit it. 
 9) What's your go-to Starbucks/coffee shop/other drink order?
Iced chai (or matcha) with almond milk! 
10) Do you have any current projects you'd like to promote or anything upcoming you'd like to tell us about?
I’m quite happy with my parent trap au (and your eyes look like comin’ home / https://archiveofourown.org/works/40186941) which I posted back in July as well as my most recent fic (come in with the rain / https://archiveofourown.org/works/41303256). I have several fics in progress that I need to finish but work has been really busy and I have been far too tired afterwards to write lately. I hope to post four more fics by the end of the year though- I currently have 96 published West Wing fics on ao3 and I’d like to make it 100. For sure I’m working on a fic about Ellie and another cjtoby au. 
 Submitted questions:
From @mlea7675: What’s your favorite AU you haven’t tried yet?
I love a classic coffee shop au and have written them for other fandoms but not tww! It’s definitely on my to write list. 
From @jessbakescakes: What's a line you've written that you're really proud of?
Serious line answer: California didn’t suit her. Ohio, Washington, she was at her best in a wool coat, the cold chill never cutting through her warmth.
Much less serious line answer: CJ did remember, distantly, that she found him handsome in that older, put together kind of way. She always felt like he looked as if he did his taxes on time and gave really good head. But it wasn’t like she devoted a lot of time thinking about this particular neighbor.
From @thefinestmuffin: When did you start writing? Have you written in other fandoms? What's your favorite thing about your OTP?
I started writing fanfiction when I was 13, before I knew what fanfic even was! Then I didn’t start writing West Wing fic until July 2020 after my second watch through. I’ve written for a lot of other fandoms but the most for TWW, Once Upon a Time, The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina, and Unreal.
I think my favorite thing about CJ and Toby is their mutual respect for each other, and how they seem to get each other on a level no one else does. Their relationship seems to mirror Sam and Josh, and Jed and Leo. 
From @S4MWILSON: craziest au you’ve created? favorite au from someone else? most and least favorite tww ships? which tww character deserves a spin off most? most overrated + most underrated tww episodes? favorite thing about cjtoby? funniest part of tww? ship you’ve never written but would like to?
Craziest AU: I’m working on a western au which has been fun! I’ve also written a cjtoby art thief au which was also pretty out there.
Favorite AU from someone else: I love Sam’s (iamsherlocked07 on ao3) bookshop au, Takes One to Know One!
Most Favorite Ship: CJ/Toby Least Favorite Ship: CJ/Danny
Character that Deserves a Spin Off: Ainsley Hayes!
Overrated Episode: I plead the fifth! Underrated Episode: my personal favorite episode is The US Poet Laureate which does not get enough love. 
Favorite thing about CJToby: (answered with thefinestmuffin’s question above)
Funniest part of tww: definitely a toss up between the Toby and Sam walking to breakfast in Mandatory Minimums and the CJ/Amy/Will scene where they’re definitely not hazing Amy.
Ship I’ve never written but want to: Andy/Amy!!
Thanks again, Emma!
If you’re interested in being featured for a future spotlight, please drop us a line here on tumblr, on twitter, or email [email protected].
xx, What’s next?
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lemondropdancer · 3 years
Text
Grounding Techniques
Mental Distraction Techniques
Pick a category of objects and try to think of as many objects as possible that fit within that category (e.g., types of dogs, cities, types of trees, crayon colors, sports)
Pick a letter and think of emotionally positive or neutral words that begin with that letter
Pick a color and look for things of that color. Notice differences in their exact shades
Say or think the alphabet backwards or alternate letters and numbers (A1, B2, C3, D4, etc)
Count backwards from 100 by 3s, 6s, or 7s or count up by prime numbers or perfect squares
Play "fizz-buzz" with yourself. Begin counting to 100 (or over!), but replace any number that contains the number 5 or is a multiple of 5 with the word "fizz" and any number that contains the number 7 or is a multiple of 7 with the word "buzz." For example, 1-15 would be "1, 2, 3, 4, fizz, 6, buzz, 8, 9, fizz, 11, 12, 13, buzz, fizz." When you mess up, compliment yourself and start over
Think of the words to your favorite song or poem or think of facts related to a specific theme
Pick a word or your name and see how many other words you can make from the letters in it
Describe an every day event or process in great detail, listing all of the steps in order and as thoroughly as possible (e.g., how to cook a meal, how to get from your house to your place of work or school, how to do your favorite dance)
Read something technical or meant for children or read words backwards to focus on the process of reading and not the words
Watch a children's television show or movie or watch cute or funny videos on Youtube; it might help to have a playlist already prepared for this
Look at a current news article that is not likely to be upsetting or distressing
Distract yourself with Tetris, Solitaire, Sudoku, word searches, or other puzzle games
Reorientation Techniques
Say or think to yourself: "My name is _________. I am safe right now. I am _____ years old. I am currently at _____________. The date is _____________. If I need help, I am with ________/can call _________. Everything is going to be alright."
List reaffirming statements ("I am fine. Everything is going to be okay. I am strong. I can handle this.")
Ask yourself where you are, what day of the week it is, what day of the month it is, what month it is, what year it is, what season it is, how old you are, and other present-focused questions
Notice things in your surroundings that indicate to you that you're safe or that you're in the present (e.g., locks on your door, electronics that didn't exist when you were younger, the presence of trusted people, a phone so that you can call for help if you need it)
Describe your surroundings in detail, including sights (objects, textures, shapes, colors), sounds, smells, and temperature
Name five things that you see, four that you feel, three that you hear, and two that you smell or taste, and then name one good thing that you like about yourself
Pick four or five brightly colored objects that are easily visible and move your focus between them. Be sure to vary the order of your gaze and concentrate briefly on each one before moving to the next
Think about a fun time that you recently had with a friend or call that friend and ask them to talk about it with you
Sensory-Based Grounding Techniques
Run cool or warm (but not too cold or hot) water over your hands or take a cool or warm bath or shower
Spritz your face (with eyes closed), neck, arms, and hands with a fine water mist
Spray yourself with your favorite perfume and focus on the scent
Feel the weight of your body in your chair or on the floor and the weight of your clothing on your skin
Touch and hold objects around you. Compare the feel, weight, temperature, textures, colors, and materials
Keep a small object with you to touch or play with when you get triggered. Good examples include a smooth stone, a fidget toy, jewelry, or a tiny plushy
Bite into a lemon, orange, or lime, suck on a sour or minty candy or an ice cube, chew cinnamon-flavored gum, or put a few drops of Tabasco sauce on your tongue. Notice the flavor, scent, and texture
Eat something or drink warm tea, coffee, or hot chocolate, and describe to yourself the taste and texture in great detail
Place a cool wash cloth on your face or hold something cold like a can of soda
Listen to soothing or familiar music. If possible, dance to it
Hum, sing, recite poetry, or make up a silly poem or story as you go
Pick up a book and read the first paragraph out loud
Hug another person (if interpersonal touch isn't a trigger). Pay attention to your own pressure and the physical sensations of doing so
Hug a tree! Register the smells of being outside, the wind, and the sights around you
Movement-Based Grounding Techniques
Breathe deeply and slowly and count your breaths
Grab tightly onto your chair or press your feet against the ground as firmly as you can
Rub your palms and clap your hands or wiggle your toes within your socks. Pay attention to the physical sensation of doing so
Stretch out your arms or legs, roll your head on your neck, or clench and unclench your fists
Stomp your feet, walk around, run, jump, ride a bike, do jumping jacks, or do yoga
While walking, notice each footstep and say to yourself "right" and "left" to correspond with the foot currently moving
Squeeze a pillow, stuffed animal, or ball
If you have a soft pet (dog or cat), brush its fur and stroke it. If you don't, brush your own hair slowly and without pulling too much
Color in an adult coloring book, finger paint, or draw anything that comes to mind without worrying about quality
Write whatever comes to mind even if it's nonsense. Try not to write about whatever is upsetting you until you're more capable of doing so without increasing the upset
Write a list of things that make you happy or look for cheerful pictures to make into a collage
Pop bubble wrap or blow and pop actual bubbles
Dig in the dirt or garden, jump on a pile of leaves, or splash around in puddles or mud
Rip up paper or stomp on aluminum cans to crush them
Imagery Techniques
Picture yourself breathing in relaxation, calm, positive feelings, or strength. Picture yourself breathing out whatever is upsetting you. It may help to pair this with imagery of breathing in soothing colors (usually blue, purple, or green) and out more intense colors (usually red or black)
If you need to relax, envision a soothing white or golden light slowly moving up your body, warming and relaxing every part of you that it touches. You can also think of it as protecting you from negativity or from harm
If the problem is intense or uncomfortable emotions, physical sensations, or memories, picture them being surrounded and neutralized by a bright and healing light, temporarily placed in a mental box to be stored for later, or dialed back by an internal controller of intensity
If you have a clear mental picture of what's upsetting you, mentally change it to something silly or harmless. If you're a fan of Harry Potter, cast a mental "riddikulus" to banish the negativity
Picture yourself calm, focused, and able to tackle whatever problems you're facing. Focus on how that would feel in the moment. What would your expression and posture be like? Make whatever changes you need to in order to make your reality reflect your goal
How to Make a Grounding Box
Get a box or basket
Personalize and decorate it with construction paper, wrapping paper, ribbon, stickers, drawings, paint, photographs, glitter, sequins, or anything else that you like
Keep within it:
A list of grounding techniques that you know work for you
A list of positive affirmations and happy memories
A list of the contact information of trusted friends or family who are willing to help and support you
Small sensory objects such as: scented candles, perfumes, or lotions; hard candies or gum; soft fabrics, a stress ball, a stuffed animal, or a fidget toy; happy pictures of you with friends; a CD with relaxing music or meditation tracks. Try to cover all of the senses
A list of possible distractions such as books to read or movies to watch
Small portable distractions such as a pack of playing cards, a small game, or a joke book
A list of comforting things to do such as taking a bubble bath, snuggling up in bed, or meditating
A small journal or notebook
In the Case of a Flashback
Tell yourself that you are having a flashback and are safe now
Remind yourself that the worst is over, and you survived it. What you're feeling now is just a reminder of that trauma and does not fit the present moment
Remind yourself of when and where you are, who you're currently with, and who you can contact if you need help (use the reorientation-focused grounding techniques)
Breathe deeply and slowly. Count your breathes and make sure that you're getting enough air
Use other mental, sensory, movement, and imagery techniques in order to distract yourself, calm yourself, and reorient yourself within the present
If possible or necessary, go somewhere where you can be alone or with a close friend, where you will feel safe, or where you feel protected or shielded
If there is anyone who you can trust or who will support you, reach out to them, let them know what happened, and let them know what you need, what would be best for you, or what they could do to help
Be gentle with yourself and take the time to really recover. If what helps you to recover is to color, take a bubble bath, hug a stuffed animal, or watch a children's movie and if it would not be disruptive to do such things at that point in time, embrace those options whole-heartedly
If possible, note or write down what triggered the flashback, what techniques you tried to use to disrupt the flashback, and what techniques helped
10K notes · View notes
softiem · 3 years
Text
you used to paint his skies (pt. 2)
pairing: Bokuto Koutarou x GN!Reader
overview: The one in which Bokuto is still swearing up and down that he loves you, but the nagging feeling in your chest is too strong to ignore.
word count: ~4.3k
content warnings: mentions of cheating, swearing, MSBY!Bokuto, mildly suggestive scene at the end (no nsfw), our baby Bokuto kind of loses it at the end, don’t let the fluffy interludes deceive you again
notes: I’M SO SORRY FOR LITERALLY BEING DEAD FOR 6 MONTHS,,, Here’s the second part to “you used to paint his skies” :D (I think this is better than part one — at least I hope so). Some people asked to be tagged for this second part, so those will be below. Thank you for reading, darlings ʕ ´•̥̥̥ ᴥ•̥̥̥`ʔ <333
part one.
––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––
“Baby?”
Faint sniffles came from Bokuto, whose head was currently nestled on your lap, the two of you strewn across the sofa. His arms were wrapped tight around your waist, as if he were afraid that holding you any looser would cause you to disappear from his arms. His voice was quiet, meek — nothing like the loud, boisterous ball of energy you’d grown to adore, to cherish.
To fall in love with.
Now, here the both of you were, a pile of cracked and fragmented pieces of the love you once shared, desperately grasping at whatever you could salvage from the mess.
You hummed a response.
“Are we gonna be okay?” Bokuto turned his head, his eyes staring up at you — wide, teary, and filled with a broken sense of hope.
In an attempt to avoid breaking down a third time, you cleared your throat. You still couldn’t look down at him, into his eyes that seemed to praise your very existence, even after the pain you caused.
“Please.” His voice cracked.
“Let’s not talk about that right now, Kou-Bokuto.”
He bit his lip roughly, enough to bite into the skin and draw a slight trace of blood. Choking on a weak sob, he nestled his head into your stomach once more. He couldn’t stop you from calling him that name anymore; he’d lost that privilege.
What could he have been asking for? For you to simply just call him your Koutarou again? For you not to leave him and stay in his arms? For you to kiss him and wipe those tears running from his pretty eyes as you tell him you’ll love him forever, no matter what?
Quite honestly, Bokuto didn’t know what he was asking of you; he didn’t know what he wanted from you.
The only thing running through his mind was the fact that he’d just ruined the best thing to ever happen to him.
You.
You, the love of his life. He knew you like the back of his hand.
He knew how, despite your small tendency to be romantically constipated, you tried your best to love him — even to the point of using stupidly cheesy pet names for each other.
– – – – –
“Please, baby!” Bokuto had your hands tightly grasped in his. “I swear, if you do this for me, I won’t ever ask you for anything else for the rest of my life — okay, that’s a lie because I really want ice cream after this, but you know what I mean!”
“Kou.” You drew in a breath. “I’m saying yes to the ice cream later, but those are the cheesiest pet names I have ever heard of.”
You saw the way Bokuto visibly deflated as he heard your soft rejection of his idea.
For the rest of the night (after stopping by the store and getting yourselves two tubs of ice cream, of course), the two of you sat cuddled up on the sofa half-paying attention to whatever B-list movie was recommended to you. Occasionally, you would hear Bokuto let out a deep sigh, most likely to try and guilt trip you into doing what he asked of you earlier.
Turning your head to face him, you grinned at the little pout on his lips as his eyes bore holes into the TV screen.
“Hey, Kou.”
Nothing. His attention stayed glued to the TV. The only sign that showed he’d heard you was the deepening of his pout.
“Koutaro, pretty boy. I’m talking to you,” you giggled.
Still nothing. You racked your brain for all of the possible ways this could end — every one of them resulted in the same thing.
Sighing, you brought up a finger to poke at his cheek. “Hey, dovey.”
If Bokuto were a dog, his ears would have stood straight up and his tail would have started wagging as he whipped his head around to look at you.
“Say that again,” he demanded, his eyes wide and sparkling and the corner of his lips twitching, just barely restraining a smile.
When you didn’t reply, his fingers prodded at your side — a promise to tickle you if you didn’t humour him right now.
“Say it again! Who am I?”
“You’re my dovey.”
“And who are you?”
You struggled to fight the urge to curl up into yourself as you answered him, “I’m your lovey.”
“And what are we together?” Bokuto brought his face closer to yours, his eyes going back and forth between your eyes and lips.
“We’re lovey dovey.” You completed it with a pair of awkward jazz hands.
With that, Bokuto’s face split into a blinding smile as his laughter rang through the living room. He brought you tight into his arms and buried his face into the crook of your neck.
“Yes! I knew you could do it, lovey!” Your cheeks grew warm as you were subjected to his rain of kisses on your face. 
Pulling him in for one last kiss to your lips, you whispered, “I love you so much, Kou.”
– – – – –
He knew how he was always the first thing on your mind; you’d put him as your first priority without fail, no matter how busy you were, even when he hadn’t put you as his.
– – – – –
Bokuto stared up at the crisp, white ceiling — hospitals were never a fun place to be in. He was broken from his thoughts when the door to his room burst open, revealing you in your ever-ethereal work clothes rushing toward him.
“Babe! Are you alright?” Stopping at the side of his bed, you brought his hand up to place a kiss on his knuckles.
Bokuto let out a light laugh as he intertwined his fingers with yours. “Yeah, it’s just a sprained ankle. Nothing to worry about, honey.”
“What do you mean ‘nothing to worry about’? Your coach said that you’d have to be out for two weeks!”
“That’s not too much! It’s not like I’ll be missing the whole season, angel.”
“But, Kou, you also have to–”
Bokuto stopped your worried rambling as he pulled you down, giving you a soft kiss on your lips and cheeks. He gave you a smile.
“Stop worrying, baby! Everything will be fine because I have the cutest, smartest, and kindest nurse to help me recover, right?”
“And who’s that?” You sent him a teasing look as your hands shuffled through your pockets looking for your phone.
“You, silly!” He paused before staring up at you in concern. “You are going to take care of me, right, baby?”
“I don’t know about that, Kou. Work has been hectic lately.” You pulled out your phone.
“But I’m injured! And I’m your boyfriend too! You can’t just leave your injured boyfriend alone to fend for himself! Baby!” Walking away from his bed, you exited the hospital room, tapping away on your phone.
A few minutes passed before you returned, seeing Bokuto sulking in the hospital bed, a familiar pout on his lips.
Your eyes softened as you gave him a smile. “Guess who just got two weeks off?”
– – – – –
The foundation of your relationship was built upon the fact that the two of you knew each other like no other; you loved each other like no other.
So how had everything culminated into such a mess?
“Bokuto.” You felt the way his body stiffened as you called his name.
“Yes,” he hesitated, “honey?”
“Do you remember what I told you a couple years ago? About what I thought of love?”
Feeling a prickling sensation in his nose, Bokuto squeezed his eyes shut, forcing out a few tears that had collected on his eyelashes.
His voice came out hoarse and weak as he whispered, “I could never forget.”
– – – – –
The sky was enveloped in a cloak of darkness, but not even the onslaught of exhaustion could prevent the two of you from leaning back on the picnic blanket to stare up at the shimmering stars.
“Baby?” Bokuto turned his head to where you lay beside him. You hummed in response, half of your attention taken by the stars.
“What do you think about love?”
You raised an eyebrow, rolling onto your side to fully look at your boyfriend.
The moonlight casted harsh shadows on his face, but the way he looked at you — eyes sparkling with curiosity and the corners of his lips curled into a light smile — softened the darkness surrounding the two of you.
“Where did that question come from?” You raised a hand to lightly trace over the curves and slopes of his face; your thumb caressed his cheek as he leaned into your touch.
“Answer my question first, and then I’ll tell you.” His eyes turned into little crescent moons as he smiled at you. “Deal?”
You pretended to think about it for a few seconds. “Hm, three kisses please,” you said, wiggling three of your fingers.
Bokuto laughed, indulging you with a kiss to both of your cheeks and a final kiss to your lips.
“Okay, okay,” you giggled. “You asked me what I think about love?”
He nodded.
“Well,” you sighed, turning back to face the midnight sky above you, “I think that love is like the sky — the sun, to be specific. It’s always changing, and everything is so unpredictable about it. There’s so much potential for destruction in what the sky holds. But, there’s always one constant. Do you know what it is, Kou?” You looked at him.
“What is it, angel?” His golden eyes glimmered, as if they were holding stars themselves.
Adjusting your position on the picnic blanket (you curled closer into Bokuto, who wrapped an arm around your shoulders), you continued, “It’s the sun. No matter how much it rains or snows or whatever weather catastrophe is happening, the sun is always going to be there. Sure, you can have multiple suns like those Star Wars planets, but…” you trailed off, looking into his eyes. “... I think I’m happy with my one sunshine.”
Bokuto, ever the romantic, pulled you into a nearly-bone-crushing hug as he laughed into your shoulder. After peppering kisses to your neck and jaw, he pulled away to look at you. He sported the brightest smile, but something sparkled behind those eyes of his.
“Baby?”
“Yeah?”
“I think you’re getting cheesier than me.”
You groaned, leaning away from him, “Shut up, Kou!”
He giggled before placing a gentle kiss on your lips.
“Now let’s get home before these mosquitoes eat us alive, honey.”
“And then you’ll tell me where you got that question from?”
“Of course, honey! I never break a deal!”
– – – – –
How could he forget what you said? Every word you’ve ever spoken to him, he’s grasped onto like a lifeline, as if they would be your last. He was so close to bursting — so close to pulling himself off of your lap, looking into your pretty eyes, grasping your shoulders, and yelling at you, screaming at you, asking why you would think he could ever forget anything about you. How dare you think he could ever forget anything about you?
But he couldn’t do that. Not to you. Not anymore.
He didn’t realise that you’d gone silent — his world had gone silent — until your sniffles broke his reverie. His arms tightened around your waist as his head nuzzled into your stomach once again; it was a broken act of comfort.
“Honey,” the edges of his voice cracked as he called out for you. “Talk to me. Please. Don’t… don’t stay quiet.”
Being met with another bout of silence was almost excruciating. Bokuto was struggling to keep himself together, to keep his head above the water before he drowned in his thoughts of losing you.
He launched himself up from your lap, grabbing your face with shaky hands. He had tears running down his face once again. His face was blotchy, and his hair was a mess. He was a mess.
“Please, lovey,” he whispered. If you stayed silent just one minute longer, he’d collapse. He was sure of it. Fighting the urge to just sit himself in your lap, pull you tight against him, and beg you not to leave, Bokuto settled with caressing the skin under your shirt.
Finally, you broke the silence.
“I forgot to tell you one thing that night.” You moved your hand from where it was resting in his hair back to your side; he tensed at the loss of your touch.
He swallowed, his anxiety began to pile up once again. “What’d you forget, baby?”
“Even though the sun” — your voice cracked — “is a constant, sometimes it can be too much. Burn too bright and dry up everything underneath the sky. Sometimes...” you paused to take a deep breath, trying to swallow back the lump that was growing in your throat. “Sometimes the sun can do even worse harm than anything the sky could do.”
Bokuto could feel the gradual increase of his heartbeat. He shook his head, his fingers involuntarily digging into your skin. No, no, you didn’t mean that. You couldn’t mean that. If you did he… he didn’t know what he would do.
“I’m sorry, Bokuto,” you murmured, “I can’t stay here any longer.”
You tried to pry yourself out of his grip, but he wouldn’t relent. His arms were shaking as he pulled you even closer into him. He was whispering something to himself.
“Bokuto, I’m being serious.” You tried to keep your voice stable but failed miserably — it all came out shaky, your tone uneven. “Let me go.”
His whispers grew louder until you could finally understand what he was saying.
“No, no. This isn’t real. I love you. I love you. No, don’t leave. Please don’t leave. I love you.”
You called his name. Once, twice, thrice. As you called for him, his whispers grew to full-blown cries.
“Bokuto!”
“I’M SORRY DON’T LEAVE ME!”
But the only thing your eyes chose to focus on was the trail of red and purple leading down his neck.
You felt a prickling sensation behind your eyes, a feeling that had grown familiar to you in the past few hours.
Bokuto caught the wandering of your eyes down his neck, a faraway mist muddled the irises he loved gazing into; he realised what you were staring at, forcing down a choked sob. He clenched his jaw, violently cursing himself for making you feel like you weren’t enough, like you weren’t the one keeping him standing straight.
Like you weren’t his sun, moon, stars, and whatever else you filled the fucking sky with.
He gently moved your head, trying to get you to look back into his eyes and away from the bruised mistake that marred his skin. His thoughts only filled with one thing — “Come back to me, baby.”
Waves of relief crashed against him once you met his eyes.
“Baby– Angel– I’m so– I don’t– Please–” Bokuto struggled to keep his thoughts straight. Not when you stared at him with an iciness that pierced his heart every time he looked back into your eyes, hoping to find even the smallest trace of love left for him.
He let out a rough sigh, frustrated with his inability to speak through the racing of his heart. His hands, still cupping your face, lightly squeezed your cheeks to ground himself. He looked back to you, his eyes swimming with even more tears, trying to send a message to you that he couldn’t put into words.
You looked away from him, focusing on the ticking clock on the wall as you gnawed your lip. A question had been running through your mind ever since he cracked into your resolve to leave and pulled you to the sofa, laying his head in your lap.
Your eyes turned back to him.
“Can you tell me something, Bokuto?”
“Yes, yes, baby, of course. I’ll do anything you want.” He eagerly nodded, a small spark of hope sparkled within him.
“Why’d you lie?”
He felt as though you just dumped him into one of Atsumu’s god-awful ice baths.
“What’re you saying, angel?” His eyebrows furrowed. “I’ve never lied to you.”
“Earlier,” you croaked. “I asked you earlier how long you’ve been” — you couldn’t say that word; it’d hurt too much — “messing around.”
A glint of recognition passed his eyes.
Continuing, you forced your voice out, even though it grew weaker the more you tried to hide your pain, “You said that it was just this once. That wasn’t the whole truth, was it?”
Fuck. Bokuto took his hands away from your face, opting to grasp one of your hands in his. He gave your knuckles a kiss before looking back at you, his eyes teeming with unadulterated guilt and desperation.
“I-I knew them before this ever happened. We met at one of the team parties, but you weren’t there because you were at work.” He saw a glimpse of darkness shadow over your face, and his heartbeat picked up again (not that it ever really settled). “But we never did anything! Not until last night, at least.” His voice grew quiet at the end.
“And never once did it occur to you to tell them that you were taken?”
Bokuto’s lips started trembling — no doubt he’d begin crying again. He looked down, trying to avoid your glare, but his grip on your hand never loosened.
“Please, baby. I’m so sorry,” he choked out, “I’m so fucking sorry. I fucked up in the worst way possible. But I promise you, I never did anything with them before. We just talked at that one party. I promise you that. I promise, honey.”
The look in your eyes became even colder, even more distant; something akin to hatred was present as well. No, this couldn’t be happening. His worst nightmare was coming true. You’d finally learned the truth and were going to leave him. You might have called him your sunshine that one night two years ago, but, to him, you were his oxygen — without you, he was truly nothing. Just a corpse of a man, not worth wasting a breath on.
He was losing you. Again.
“I’m leaving, Bokuto.” You roughly pulled your hand from his grasp, ignoring his cries for you to please stop, to listen for just a minute longer. “Don’t you dare try to look for me.”
Bokuto whimpered, following you to where you were trying to pick up your bags in your haste of anger. Once again, he tugged at the straps, trying to steal them away from you, but his arms grew weak at the scowl pointed his way.
His breath quickened, and his heart raced. He was panicking, grasping at straws to have to rethink your choice and stay with him so he could apologise for the rest of both of your lives. He’d spend the remainder of eternity begging for your forgiveness if only you’d just stay with him.
But he couldn’t say a word. Not with his blinded panic, and definitely not with the terrible, agonising look you were giving him as you stared back at him.
Was this how you felt when he’d walked out on you last night? Hopeless. Defenseless. As if you weren’t even worth a grain of sand underneath the other’s shoe.
“Lovey, I’m sorry!” Bokuto cried out one more time, hoping that he’d reach out to whatever small piece of love you still held for him. “I said I’m sorry! Please just forgive me, don’t leave me. Please! I’m begging you! Whatever you want me to do, I’ll do it a million times over. Just, please,” he quieted to a whisper, just barely reaching your ears, “stay with me, and we can get through this together.”
His face crumpled as he heard your responding scoff.
“There’s no more ‘together’ for us, Bokuto.”
Your words stung — well, they stung as much as a gunshot or a knife to the heart would sting. He pressed on, desperate to get you to hear him out.
“I’m your sunshine, right? Your dovey. Your babe. Your pretty boy. Your Koutarou. Right?” He gripped onto the hem of his shirt, balling his hands into fists. “No matter what you call me, I’m yours. And I always will be. Even if you leave me right now, I’ll never stop looking for you. You know why?”
You stayed silent.
“Because I am just as much your sun as you are mine.”
His words echoed in your mind — that twisted, gnawing feeling came back in your gut. You knew that if you stayed for one more minute, it’d be over for you, and you’d go running back into his arms that always held you so tightly. Into his arms that smelt like home. Into his arms that made you feel like you were on top of the world as long as he was by your side. Into his arms that held onto another once the two of you reached a rough patch.
You made your decision.
“Koutarou…” His head snapped up to look at you, his eyes wide and glittering with a false sense of hope. “I’m sorry. I have to leave.”
There was another feeling growing within Bokuto. It was ugly, festering in the deepest parts of his mind — coming from a place that refused to acknowledge his faults. This feeling, it blamed
you. Why would you hurt him like this? How could you hurt him like this? You said he was your sunshine, your dovey, your Koutarou! How cruel could you be to lead him on, calling him ‘Koutarou’ again? You said you loved him!
“Don’t leave me!” He raised his voice. This feeling was taking over him, and it was angry. “If you leave, I’ll-I’ll…” His voice trailed off as he tried to regain control of himself.
Your brows furrowed. He still had the energy to yell, huh?
“You’ll what?” You took a step toward him. He looked away from you, trying to avoid your burning gaze. “Tell me, Koutarou. What will you do if I leave?”
He shook his head; you knew what that meant — “I won’t say it.”
“You’ll go back to them, won’t you?” you scoffed. “Have fun, Koutarou.”
Adjusting the straps of your bags, you gave him one last glare before moving toward the door once more.
That feeling came back in Bokuto’s mind, and it was stronger than ever. Pounding against the walls he built up, it roared, telling him to make you regret hurting him, make you think twice about leaving him. Bokuto was panicking, his will to beg you to stay was growing weaker as the feeling inside him became increasingly angry at you for causing him so much pain.
He knew he’d regret the next words he’d say to you, but that realisation came a second too late.
“I’ll never forgive you!”
You froze. Turning back around to face him, your eyes narrowed. “What?”
“If you leave me, I’ll never forgive you!”
His eyes were burning into you, a raging fire behind them.
“You’ll never forgive me?” you spat.
As quickly as the fire grew, it was extinguished as Bokuto’s expression morphed into one of shock.
“Wait, baby, I didn’t mean it! I promi–”
Dropping your bags by the door, you strided toward his figure. Pushing him against the wall, you pulled him in by the collar, melding his lips with yours.
The kiss was rough, angry, desperate — an amalgamation of everything you’ve felt in the past few hours going back and forth with Bokuto.
You pushed yourself into the space between his legs as he finally recovered from his shock and tried to match your tempo, his hands pulling you close into his body. Your teeth clashed together, and you had half the mind to bite his tongue in your mouth, but you held back.
Raking your fingers through his hair, you pulled his head back, ignoring his small, pained whine. The offensive mess of red and purple blotches still covered the expanse of his neck. A scowl grew on your face.
Bokuto yelped as he felt your lips latch onto his neck, sucking your own bruises over the ones already existing from his escapade. You were rough, unrelenting in your nearly-primal way of claiming him.
Trying to ignore your satisfaction from hearing his whimpers of your name, you pulled away, looking at your series of marks covering the ones from his other lover. The two of you were left panting — him trying to meet your eyes and you trying to avoid looking at him at all costs.
Leaning into his ear, you placed a gentle bite on his lobe. He tensed ever-so-slightly.
“You’ll never forgive me if I leave?” you hummed.
His hands that were under your shirt, roaming across your back, froze.
“B-Baby, wait, I didn’t–” He tried to plead with you until your next words completely shattered what was left of his broken, battered heart.
“I think I can live with that.”
You quickly backed away from him, evading his attempts to grab at your waist to stop you from leaving, and picked up your bags by the door. Looking back at him one last time, you nearly broke your facade.
After all he’s done, you still loved your Koutarou — no matter how much you tried to convince yourself otherwise — and seeing him on his knees, sobbing, begging you not to leave for the umpteenth time, your will was wearing thin.
“Goodbye, Koutarou.”
The slam of the front door echoed across the remnants of his shattered heart and all he had the strength to do was cry. Pulling at the strands of his hair, he sobbed, begging into the air, weeping with no one to listen to him.
Without you, his world had no sky; everything was bathed in the shadow of your absence.
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tags: @katelyns-stuff @random-fandom-girl-24
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