#church of waluigi
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Siblings of sin, new to the church: he looks so scary! What's going through his mind right now?
(looking at Dewdrop in the library, staring into empty space forgetting the book in his hands)
Rain, suddenly appearing behind the siblings: you really don't want to know
Dew, internally: I wonder if Cumulus will let me play Waluigi this time in Mario Cart
#shitghosting#ghost#the band ghost#nameless ghouls#dewdrop ghoul#rain ghoul#i thought of this during work and it kept me through the day#might show the later aftermath#bug speaks
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Holidays 4.1
Holidays
April Fool’s Day
April Noddy Day
Arbor Day (Tanzania)
Atheist’s Day
Boomer Bonus Day
Boy Howdy Day
Captains Regent Day (San Mario)
Capture of Brielle Remembrance (Netherlands)
Chaos Energy Day
Civil Service Day (Thailand)
Dupuytren’s Disease Awareness Day (Florida)
Edible Book Day
EOKA Day (Cyprus)
Festival of Irritating Jokes & Childish Japes
Festival of Positive Threats
Flag Day (Mauritania)
Fossil Fools Day
Gardtide (Elder Scrolls)
Ghodejatra (Katmandu Valley, Nepal)
Gowkie Day (a.k.a. Gowkin' Day; Scotland)
Greek Cypriot Day (EOKA Day; Cyprus)
Hatching Day (in “The Dragonriders of Pern”)
Hornbeam Day (French Republic)
Hunt-the-Gowk Day (Scotland)
International Birding Day (Russia)
International Bull Terrier Day
International Fun at Work Day
International Tatting Day
International Tom Hanks Day
International Waluigi Day
Intolerance Day
Investiture of the New Captains Regent (San Marino)
Islamic Republic Day (Iran)
Kalends of April (Ancient Rome)
Library Snapshot Day
Lupus Alert Day
Margaritaville Day
Myles Day
Näfelser Fahrtfest (Glarus, Switzerland)
National Atheist’s Day
National Broadcasting Day (Indonesia)
National Connor Day
National Day of Hope
National DIY Day
National Greeting Card Day
National Jump in Muddy Puddles Day
National Love Our Children Day
National Loyal Day
National Lupus Alert Day
National One Cent Day
National Tom Foolerys Day
National Tree Planting Day (Tanzania)
National Trombone Players Day
Nature Day (Iran)
Nickelodeon Day
No More Dishpan Hands Day
One Cent Day
Odisha Day (a.k.a. Orissa Day; India)
Pigasus Award Announcement Day
Poetry and the Creative Mind Day
Poisson d’Avril (France)
Reading Is Funny Day
Semana Santa ends (Nicaragua)
Social Circus Day
Sorry Charlie Day
Spaghetti Tree Day
Take Down Tobacco National Day of Action [Date Varies]
Take Your Horse to Work Day
Tangible Karma Day
US Air Force Academy Day
Užupis Day (Lithuania)
White Rabbit Day
Youth Day (Benin)
Food & Drink Celebrations
Cognac Birthday
International Day of the Barista
National Sourdough Bread Day
National Soylent Green Day
Organic Restaurant Day
Prankster Day (North Coast Brewing)
Sliced Bread Day (a.k.a. Birthday of Sliced Bread)
Soy Foods Day
1st Monday in April
National Bake Week begins [1st Monday]
National Fun Day [1st Monday]
National IEP Writing Day [1st Monday]
Sweet Potato Day [1st Monday]
Tater Day (Kentucky) [1st Monday]
Weekly Holidays beginning April 1 (1st Week)
Golden Rule Week [thru 4.7]
International Pooper Scooper Week [thru 4.7]
Laugh at Work Week [thru 4.7]
Medication Safety Week [thru 4.7]
National Bake Week (1st Monday) [thru 4.7]
National Center Registrars Week [thru 4.5]
National Egg Salad Day (Monday after Easter) [thru 4.7]
National Public Health Week [thru 4.7]
National Raw Feeding Week [thru 4.7]
National Wildlife Week [thru 4.7]
Testicular Cancer Awareness Day [thru 4.7]
Independence & Related Days
Iran (Declared a theocratic Islamic Republic; 1979)
New Year’s Days
Assyrian New Year (a.k.a. …
Akitu (ܐܟܝܬܘ)
Ha b-Nisin
Ha b-Nison
Kha b-Nisan
Resha d-Sheta
Syriac (ܪܫܐ ܕܫܢܬܐ / Head of the Year)
British Financial Year begins (UK)
Festivals Beginning April 1, 2024
Idaho Craft Beer Month (Idaho) [thru 4.30]
Kalmyk Tulip Festival (Elista, Russia) [thru 4.30]
Silverburn Carnival (Edinburgh, Scotland)
Skagit Valley Tulip Festival (Mount Vernon, Virginia) [thru 4.30]
Feast Days
All Fools Day (Pastafarian)
Anne McCaffrey (Writerism)
Benny Rabbit (Muppetism)
Catherine of Palma (Christian; Saint)
Cellach of Armagh (Christian; Saint)
The Cruelest Month Week (Shamanism)
Dan Flavin (Artology)
Day of Fornax (Goddess of Baking Bread; Ancient Rome)
Day of Hathor (Egyptian Goddess of Drunkenness; also 1.23)
Edwin Austin Abbey (Artology)
Eris Day (Church of the SubGenius; Saint)
Festival of Fortuna Virilis (Ancient Rome)
Festival of Renenutet, and the Birthday of Neper (Ancient Egyptian God of Grain)
Fortuna Virilis (Old Roman women's festival to Venus, seeking good relations with men)
Frederick Denison Maurice (Episcopal Church (USA))
Gilbert de Moray, Bishop of Caithness, Scotland (Christian; Saint)
Hippocrates (Positivist; Saint)
Hugh of Bonnevaux (Christian; Saint)
Hugh of Grenoble (Christian; Saint)
Kanamara Matsuri (Festival of the Steel Phallus; Japan)
Lazarus (Christian; Saint) [Bulgaria; Girls]
Loki's Day (Norse)
Macarius the Wonder-worker (Christian; Saint)
Mary of Egypt (Christian; Saint)
Melito of Sardis (Christian; Saint)
Milan Kundera (Writerism)
Night of the Evil Clown Day (Church of the SubGenius)
Nuno Álvares Pereira (Christian; Saint)
Samuel R. Delany (Writerism)
St. Stupid's Day (First Church of the Last Laugh; San Francisco)
Tewdrig (Christian; Saint)
Theodora (Christian; Saint)
Ticino Pasta Harvesting Day (Pastafarian)
Veneralia (Festival to Venus; Ancient Rome)
Walric, abbot of Leuconay (Christian; Saint)
William Mulready (Artology)
Christian Liturgical Holidays
Easter Monday [Monday after Easter] (a.k.a. …
Anjo Festival (Portugal)
Annandag Påsk (Sweden)
Bright Monday
Dyngus Day
Egg Nite (Roman Catholic)
Egg Races (Switzerland)
Ellis Island Family History Day
Emaishen (Luxembourg)
Family Day (South Africa)
General Debauchery Day (Pastafarian)
Hallaton Hare Pie Scramble & Bottle Kicking (Leicestershire, UK)
Memorial Day (Republic of Georgia)
Otras Lieldienas (Latvia)
Peeps Day
Pomlazk (Czechia)
Seu Harvest Parade (Curacao)
Sint Veroonmars Soldier’s Procession (Lambeek, Belgium)
Smell-the-Breezes Day (Shamm en-Nisīm; Egypt)
Veľkonočný Pondelok (Slovakia)
Watering Monday (Hungary)
Wet Easter Monday (Poland)
White House Easter Egg Roll
Lucky & Unlucky Days
Shakku (赤口 Japan) [Bad luck all day, except at noon.]
Uncyclopedia Bad to Be Born Today (because it’s April Fool’s Day.)
Premieres
Alice’s Spooky Adventure (Disney Cartoon; 1924)
Alpine Antics (Oswald the Lucky Rabbit Cartoon; 1929)
Alvin’s Solo Flight (Noveltoons Cartoon; 1961)
America the Beautiful, sung by Ray Charles (Song; 1976)
Another Roadside Attraction Tom Robbins (Novel; 1971)
Bad Luck and Trouble, 11th Jack Reacher book, by Lee Child (Novel; 2007)
Baffling Bunnies (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1956)
The Beauty Shop (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1950)
Big Bad Bobcat (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1968)
Birds of a Feather (WB LT Cartoon; 1961)
Bird Symphony (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1955)
Blaze of Glory, by Joe Jackson (Album; 1989)
The Blue Angel (Film; 1930)
The Bone Ranger (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1957)
A Boy and His Dog, by Harlan Ellison (Novella; 1969)
A Brief History of Time, by Stephen Hawking (Book; 1988)
Buddy’s Theatre (WB LT Cartoon; 1935)
Champion Chump (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1966)
Chicken Jitters (WB LT Cartoon; 1939)
A Cold Romance (Mighty Mouse Cartoon; 1949)
A Confederacy of Dunces, by John Kennedy Toole (Novel; 1980)
Conjure Wife, by Fritz Leiber (Short Story; 1943)
Daddy’s Little Darling (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1957)
Daffy Duck’s Easter Show (WB Animated TV Special; 1980)
Death: The Time of Your Life, by Neil Gaiman (Comic Mini-Series; 1996)
Dodge City (Film; 1939)
Don’t Spill the Beans (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1965)
Echo Burning, 5th Jack Reacher book, by Lee Child (Novel; 2001)
The Enlarger (Mighty Mouse Cartoon; 1970)
The Female Spectator, by Eliza Haywood (Magazine; 1744)
The Famous Ride, featuring Hector Heathcote (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1960)
The Feudin’ Hillbillies (Mighty Mouse Cartoon; 1948)
The Flamboyant Arms (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1959)
Foiling the Fox (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1950)
The Enemy, 8th Jack Reacher book, by Lee Child (Novel; 2004)
General Hospital (TV Soap Opera; 1963)
The Ghost Monster (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1970)
Gone Tomorrow, 13th Jack Reacher book, by Lee Child (Novel; 2009)
Good Deed Daly (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1955)
Goodie the Gremlin (Noveltoons Cartoon; 1961)
Hard Times, by Charles Dickens (Novel; 1854)
The Heat’s Off (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1967)
Hero For A Day (Mighty Mouse Cartoon; 1953)
Hop (Animated Film; 2011)
Hound About That (Noveltoons Cartoon; 1961)
Hounding the Hares, featuring Farmer Al Falfa (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1948)
The Hound of the Baskervilles by Arthur Conan Doyle (Novel; 1902)
Howl's Moving Castle, by Diana Wynne Jones (Novel; 1986)
The Juggler of Our Lady (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1958)
Just One More Chance (Betty Boop Cartoon; 1932)
King Rounder (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1964)
Leviathan, by Thomas Hobbes (Book; 1651)
The Little Prince, by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (Novella; 1943)
The Lost World, by Arthur Conan Doyle (Novel; 1912)
Loyal Royalty, featuring Hashimoto (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1962)
Made for Love (TV Series; 2021)
The Mad Hermit of Chimney Butte (Animated TV Special; 1960)
Maid-Sama! (Anime Series; 2010)
The Man Who Laughs, by Victor Hugo (Novel; 1869)
The Man With the Golden Gun, by Ian Fleming (Novel; 1959) [James Bond #13]
The Meaning of Life (Film; 1983)
The Might Termite (Modern Madcaps Cartoon; 1961)
The Missing Genie (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1963)
Monkey Doodles (Noveltoons Cartoon; 1960)
Moth and the Flame (Disney Silly Symphonies Cartoon; 1938)
A Mountain Romance (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1938)
The Murders in the Rue Morgue, by Edgar Allan Poe (Short Story; 1841)
Nicholas Nickleby, by Charles Dickens (Novel; 1838)
Nobody’s Ghost, featuring Deputy Dawg (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1962)
On Her Majesty’s Secret Service, by Ian Fleming (Novel; 1959) [James Bond #11]
One Shot, 9th Jack Reacher book, by Lee Child (Novel; 2005)
The Orphan Egg (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1953)
Parade's End, by Ford Madox Ford (Novel; 1924)
Passing, by Nella Larsen (Novel; 1929)
Peanut Battle, featuring Sidney (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1962)
Personæ, by Ezra Pound (Poetry; 1909)
Person to Bunny (WB MM Cartoon; 1960)
Persuader, 7th Jack Reacher book, by Lee Child (Novel; 2003)
Pet Problems (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1954)
The Pickwick Papers, by Charles Dickens (Novel; 1836)
The Picture of Dorian Gray, by Oscar Wilde (Novel; 1891)
Play That Funky Music, by Wild Cherry (Song; 1976)
Poor Little Witch Girl (Modern Madcaps Cartoon; 1965)
Prescription For Percy, featuring Roquefort & Percy (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1954)
Running Blind, 4th Jack Reacher book, by Lee Child (Novel; 2000)
Sagebrush Sadie (Disney Oswald the Lucky Rabbit Cartoon; 1928)
Scouts to the Rescue (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1956)
Screwball Squirrel, featuring Screwy Squirrel (MGM Cartoon; 1944)
The 700 Club (Religious Propaganda Series; 1966)
Shaddup Your Face, by Joe Dolce (Song; 1981)
Sin City (Film; 2005)
Some Do Not…, by Ford Madox Ford (Novel; 1924)
The Sound of Music (Film; 1965)
Space Invaders (Video Game; 1978)
Spacewar! (Video Game; 1962)
The Stowaways (Heckle & Jeckle Cartoon; 1949)
Strange Companion, featuring Hashimoto (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1961)
The Stretcher (Mighty Mouse Cartoon; 1969)
Strife with Father (WB MM Cartoon; 1950)
The Sword of Shannara, by Terry Brooks (Novel; 1977)
Therapeutic Pink (Pink Panther Cartoon; 1977)
Time Gallops On (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1952)
Trash Program (Modern Madcaps Cartoon; 1963)
Trigger Treat (Modern Madcaps Cartoon; 1960)
The Trip (Noveltoons Cartoon; 1967)
The Tudors (TV Series; 2007)
2112, by Rush (Album; 1976)
25 O’Clock, by XTC, a.k.a. the Dukes of the Stratosphear (Album; 1985)
The War of the Worlds, by H.G. Wells (Novel; 1897)
Weather Systems, by Andrew Bird (Album; 2003)
The Winding the Willows, by Kenneth Grahame (Novel; 1908)
Without Fail, 6th Jack Reacher book, by Lee Child (Novel; 2002)
Wynonna Earp (TV Series; 2016)
Today’s Name Days
Hugo, Irene, Irina (Austria)
Anastazije, Božica, Mavro, Venancije (Croatia)
Hugo (Czech Republic)
Hugo (Denmark)
Harald, Harri, Harro, Herald (Estonia)
Peppi, Pulmu, Raita (Finland)
Hugues, Valéry (France)
Hugo, Irene, Irina (Germany)
Hugó (Hungary)
Dora, Irene, Ugo (Italy)
Dagne, Dagnis, Tautmilis, Teodora, Teofils (Latvia)
Dainora, Rimgaudas, Teodora (Lithuania)
Aron, Arve, Arvid (Norway)
Chryzant, Grażyna, Hugo, Hugon, Katarzyna, Teodora, Tolisław, Zbigniew, Zbyszko (Poland)
Maria (Romania)
Darya, Klavdia (Russia)
Hugo (Slovakia)
Hugo, Venancio (Spain)
Harald, Hervor (Sweden)
April, Arden, Argus, Diamond, Paris (USA)
Today is Also…
Day of Year: Day 92 of 2024; 274 days remaining in the year
ISO: Day 1 of week 14 of 2024
Celtic Tree Calendar: Fearn (Alder) [Day 16 of 28]
Chinese: Month 2 (Ding-Mao), Day 23 (Yi-Wei)
Chinese Year of the: Dragon 4722 (until January 29, 2025)
Hebrew: 22 Adair II 5784
Islamic: 22 Ramadan 1445
J Cal: 2 Cyan; Twosday [2 of 30]
Julian: 19 March 2024
Moon: 50%: 3rd Quarter
Positivist: 8 Archimedes (4th Month) [Euclid]
Runic Half Month: Ehwaz (Horse) [Day 7 of 15]
Season: Spring (Day 14 of 92)
Week: Last Week of March
Zodiac: Aries (Day 12 of 31)
Calendar Changes
April (Gregorian Calendar) [Month 4 of 12]
0 notes
Text
Holidays 4.1
Holidays
April Fool’s Day
April Noddy Day
Arbor Day (Tanzania)
Atheist’s Day
Boomer Bonus Day
Boy Howdy Day
Captains Regent Day (San Mario)
Capture of Brielle Remembrance (Netherlands)
Chaos Energy Day
Civil Service Day (Thailand)
Dupuytren’s Disease Awareness Day (Florida)
Edible Book Day
EOKA Day (Cyprus)
Festival of Irritating Jokes & Childish Japes
Festival of Positive Threats
Flag Day (Mauritania)
Fossil Fools Day
Gardtide (Elder Scrolls)
Ghodejatra (Katmandu Valley, Nepal)
Gowkie Day (a.k.a. Gowkin' Day; Scotland)
Greek Cypriot Day (EOKA Day; Cyprus)
Hatching Day (in “The Dragonriders of Pern”)
Hornbeam Day (French Republic)
Hunt-the-Gowk Day (Scotland)
International Birding Day (Russia)
International Bull Terrier Day
International Fun at Work Day
International Tatting Day
International Tom Hanks Day
International Waluigi Day
Intolerance Day
Investiture of the New Captains Regent (San Marino)
Islamic Republic Day (Iran)
Kalends of April (Ancient Rome)
Library Snapshot Day
Lupus Alert Day
Margaritaville Day
Myles Day
Näfelser Fahrtfest (Glarus, Switzerland)
National Atheist’s Day
National Broadcasting Day (Indonesia)
National Connor Day
National Day of Hope
National DIY Day
National Greeting Card Day
National Jump in Muddy Puddles Day
National Love Our Children Day
National Loyal Day
National Lupus Alert Day
National One Cent Day
National Tom Foolerys Day
National Tree Planting Day (Tanzania)
National Trombone Players Day
Nature Day (Iran)
Nickelodeon Day
No More Dishpan Hands Day
One Cent Day
Odisha Day (a.k.a. Orissa Day; India)
Pigasus Award Announcement Day
Poetry and the Creative Mind Day
Poisson d’Avril (France)
Reading Is Funny Day
Semana Santa ends (Nicaragua)
Social Circus Day
Sorry Charlie Day
Spaghetti Tree Day
Take Down Tobacco National Day of Action [Date Varies]
Take Your Horse to Work Day
Tangible Karma Day
US Air Force Academy Day
Užupis Day (Lithuania)
White Rabbit Day
Youth Day (Benin)
Food & Drink Celebrations
Cognac Birthday
International Day of the Barista
National Sourdough Bread Day
National Soylent Green Day
Organic Restaurant Day
Prankster Day (North Coast Brewing)
Sliced Bread Day (a.k.a. Birthday of Sliced Bread)
Soy Foods Day
1st Monday in April
National Bake Week begins [1st Monday]
National Fun Day [1st Monday]
National IEP Writing Day [1st Monday]
Sweet Potato Day [1st Monday]
Tater Day (Kentucky) [1st Monday]
Weekly Holidays beginning April 1 (1st Week)
Golden Rule Week [thru 4.7]
International Pooper Scooper Week [thru 4.7]
Laugh at Work Week [thru 4.7]
Medication Safety Week [thru 4.7]
National Bake Week (1st Monday) [thru 4.7]
National Center Registrars Week [thru 4.5]
National Egg Salad Day (Monday after Easter) [thru 4.7]
National Public Health Week [thru 4.7]
National Raw Feeding Week [thru 4.7]
National Wildlife Week [thru 4.7]
Testicular Cancer Awareness Day [thru 4.7]
Independence & Related Days
Iran (Declared a theocratic Islamic Republic; 1979)
New Year’s Days
Assyrian New Year (a.k.a. …
Akitu (ܐܟܝܬܘ)
Ha b-Nisin
Ha b-Nison
Kha b-Nisan
Resha d-Sheta
Syriac (ܪܫܐ ܕܫܢܬܐ / Head of the Year)
British Financial Year begins (UK)
Festivals Beginning April 1, 2024
Idaho Craft Beer Month (Idaho) [thru 4.30]
Kalmyk Tulip Festival (Elista, Russia) [thru 4.30]
Silverburn Carnival (Edinburgh, Scotland)
Skagit Valley Tulip Festival (Mount Vernon, Virginia) [thru 4.30]
Feast Days
All Fools Day (Pastafarian)
Anne McCaffrey (Writerism)
Benny Rabbit (Muppetism)
Catherine of Palma (Christian; Saint)
Cellach of Armagh (Christian; Saint)
The Cruelest Month Week (Shamanism)
Dan Flavin (Artology)
Day of Fornax (Goddess of Baking Bread; Ancient Rome)
Day of Hathor (Egyptian Goddess of Drunkenness; also 1.23)
Edwin Austin Abbey (Artology)
Eris Day (Church of the SubGenius; Saint)
Festival of Fortuna Virilis (Ancient Rome)
Festival of Renenutet, and the Birthday of Neper (Ancient Egyptian God of Grain)
Fortuna Virilis (Old Roman women's festival to Venus, seeking good relations with men)
Frederick Denison Maurice (Episcopal Church (USA))
Gilbert de Moray, Bishop of Caithness, Scotland (Christian; Saint)
Hippocrates (Positivist; Saint)
Hugh of Bonnevaux (Christian; Saint)
Hugh of Grenoble (Christian; Saint)
Kanamara Matsuri (Festival of the Steel Phallus; Japan)
Lazarus (Christian; Saint) [Bulgaria; Girls]
Loki's Day (Norse)
Macarius the Wonder-worker (Christian; Saint)
Mary of Egypt (Christian; Saint)
Melito of Sardis (Christian; Saint)
Milan Kundera (Writerism)
Night of the Evil Clown Day (Church of the SubGenius)
Nuno Álvares Pereira (Christian; Saint)
Samuel R. Delany (Writerism)
St. Stupid's Day (First Church of the Last Laugh; San Francisco)
Tewdrig (Christian; Saint)
Theodora (Christian; Saint)
Ticino Pasta Harvesting Day (Pastafarian)
Veneralia (Festival to Venus; Ancient Rome)
Walric, abbot of Leuconay (Christian; Saint)
William Mulready (Artology)
Christian Liturgical Holidays
Easter Monday [Monday after Easter] (a.k.a. …
Anjo Festival (Portugal)
Annandag Påsk (Sweden)
Bright Monday
Dyngus Day
Egg Nite (Roman Catholic)
Egg Races (Switzerland)
Ellis Island Family History Day
Emaishen (Luxembourg)
Family Day (South Africa)
General Debauchery Day (Pastafarian)
Hallaton Hare Pie Scramble & Bottle Kicking (Leicestershire, UK)
Memorial Day (Republic of Georgia)
Otras Lieldienas (Latvia)
Peeps Day
Pomlazk (Czechia)
Seu Harvest Parade (Curacao)
Sint Veroonmars Soldier’s Procession (Lambeek, Belgium)
Smell-the-Breezes Day (Shamm en-Nisīm; Egypt)
Veľkonočný Pondelok (Slovakia)
Watering Monday (Hungary)
Wet Easter Monday (Poland)
White House Easter Egg Roll
Lucky & Unlucky Days
Shakku (赤口 Japan) [Bad luck all day, except at noon.]
Uncyclopedia Bad to Be Born Today (because it’s April Fool’s Day.)
Premieres
Alice’s Spooky Adventure (Disney Cartoon; 1924)
Alpine Antics (Oswald the Lucky Rabbit Cartoon; 1929)
Alvin’s Solo Flight (Noveltoons Cartoon; 1961)
America the Beautiful, sung by Ray Charles (Song; 1976)
Another Roadside Attraction Tom Robbins (Novel; 1971)
Bad Luck and Trouble, 11th Jack Reacher book, by Lee Child (Novel; 2007)
Baffling Bunnies (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1956)
The Beauty Shop (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1950)
Big Bad Bobcat (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1968)
Birds of a Feather (WB LT Cartoon; 1961)
Bird Symphony (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1955)
Blaze of Glory, by Joe Jackson (Album; 1989)
The Blue Angel (Film; 1930)
The Bone Ranger (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1957)
A Boy and His Dog, by Harlan Ellison (Novella; 1969)
A Brief History of Time, by Stephen Hawking (Book; 1988)
Buddy’s Theatre (WB LT Cartoon; 1935)
Champion Chump (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1966)
Chicken Jitters (WB LT Cartoon; 1939)
A Cold Romance (Mighty Mouse Cartoon; 1949)
A Confederacy of Dunces, by John Kennedy Toole (Novel; 1980)
Conjure Wife, by Fritz Leiber (Short Story; 1943)
Daddy’s Little Darling (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1957)
Daffy Duck’s Easter Show (WB Animated TV Special; 1980)
Death: The Time of Your Life, by Neil Gaiman (Comic Mini-Series; 1996)
Dodge City (Film; 1939)
Don’t Spill the Beans (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1965)
Echo Burning, 5th Jack Reacher book, by Lee Child (Novel; 2001)
The Enlarger (Mighty Mouse Cartoon; 1970)
The Female Spectator, by Eliza Haywood (Magazine; 1744)
The Famous Ride, featuring Hector Heathcote (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1960)
The Feudin’ Hillbillies (Mighty Mouse Cartoon; 1948)
The Flamboyant Arms (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1959)
Foiling the Fox (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1950)
The Enemy, 8th Jack Reacher book, by Lee Child (Novel; 2004)
General Hospital (TV Soap Opera; 1963)
The Ghost Monster (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1970)
Gone Tomorrow, 13th Jack Reacher book, by Lee Child (Novel; 2009)
Good Deed Daly (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1955)
Goodie the Gremlin (Noveltoons Cartoon; 1961)
Hard Times, by Charles Dickens (Novel; 1854)
The Heat’s Off (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1967)
Hero For A Day (Mighty Mouse Cartoon; 1953)
Hop (Animated Film; 2011)
Hound About That (Noveltoons Cartoon; 1961)
Hounding the Hares, featuring Farmer Al Falfa (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1948)
The Hound of the Baskervilles by Arthur Conan Doyle (Novel; 1902)
Howl's Moving Castle, by Diana Wynne Jones (Novel; 1986)
The Juggler of Our Lady (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1958)
Just One More Chance (Betty Boop Cartoon; 1932)
King Rounder (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1964)
Leviathan, by Thomas Hobbes (Book; 1651)
The Little Prince, by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (Novella; 1943)
The Lost World, by Arthur Conan Doyle (Novel; 1912)
Loyal Royalty, featuring Hashimoto (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1962)
Made for Love (TV Series; 2021)
The Mad Hermit of Chimney Butte (Animated TV Special; 1960)
Maid-Sama! (Anime Series; 2010)
The Man Who Laughs, by Victor Hugo (Novel; 1869)
The Man With the Golden Gun, by Ian Fleming (Novel; 1959) [James Bond #13]
The Meaning of Life (Film; 1983)
The Might Termite (Modern Madcaps Cartoon; 1961)
The Missing Genie (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1963)
Monkey Doodles (Noveltoons Cartoon; 1960)
Moth and the Flame (Disney Silly Symphonies Cartoon; 1938)
A Mountain Romance (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1938)
The Murders in the Rue Morgue, by Edgar Allan Poe (Short Story; 1841)
Nicholas Nickleby, by Charles Dickens (Novel; 1838)
Nobody’s Ghost, featuring Deputy Dawg (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1962)
On Her Majesty’s Secret Service, by Ian Fleming (Novel; 1959) [James Bond #11]
One Shot, 9th Jack Reacher book, by Lee Child (Novel; 2005)
The Orphan Egg (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1953)
Parade's End, by Ford Madox Ford (Novel; 1924)
Passing, by Nella Larsen (Novel; 1929)
Peanut Battle, featuring Sidney (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1962)
Personæ, by Ezra Pound (Poetry; 1909)
Person to Bunny (WB MM Cartoon; 1960)
Persuader, 7th Jack Reacher book, by Lee Child (Novel; 2003)
Pet Problems (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1954)
The Pickwick Papers, by Charles Dickens (Novel; 1836)
The Picture of Dorian Gray, by Oscar Wilde (Novel; 1891)
Play That Funky Music, by Wild Cherry (Song; 1976)
Poor Little Witch Girl (Modern Madcaps Cartoon; 1965)
Prescription For Percy, featuring Roquefort & Percy (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1954)
Running Blind, 4th Jack Reacher book, by Lee Child (Novel; 2000)
Sagebrush Sadie (Disney Oswald the Lucky Rabbit Cartoon; 1928)
Scouts to the Rescue (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1956)
Screwball Squirrel, featuring Screwy Squirrel (MGM Cartoon; 1944)
The 700 Club (Religious Propaganda Series; 1966)
Shaddup Your Face, by Joe Dolce (Song; 1981)
Sin City (Film; 2005)
Some Do Not…, by Ford Madox Ford (Novel; 1924)
The Sound of Music (Film; 1965)
Space Invaders (Video Game; 1978)
Spacewar! (Video Game; 1962)
The Stowaways (Heckle & Jeckle Cartoon; 1949)
Strange Companion, featuring Hashimoto (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1961)
The Stretcher (Mighty Mouse Cartoon; 1969)
Strife with Father (WB MM Cartoon; 1950)
The Sword of Shannara, by Terry Brooks (Novel; 1977)
Therapeutic Pink (Pink Panther Cartoon; 1977)
Time Gallops On (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1952)
Trash Program (Modern Madcaps Cartoon; 1963)
Trigger Treat (Modern Madcaps Cartoon; 1960)
The Trip (Noveltoons Cartoon; 1967)
The Tudors (TV Series; 2007)
2112, by Rush (Album; 1976)
25 O’Clock, by XTC, a.k.a. the Dukes of the Stratosphear (Album; 1985)
The War of the Worlds, by H.G. Wells (Novel; 1897)
Weather Systems, by Andrew Bird (Album; 2003)
The Winding the Willows, by Kenneth Grahame (Novel; 1908)
Without Fail, 6th Jack Reacher book, by Lee Child (Novel; 2002)
Wynonna Earp (TV Series; 2016)
Today’s Name Days
Hugo, Irene, Irina (Austria)
Anastazije, Božica, Mavro, Venancije (Croatia)
Hugo (Czech Republic)
Hugo (Denmark)
Harald, Harri, Harro, Herald (Estonia)
Peppi, Pulmu, Raita (Finland)
Hugues, Valéry (France)
Hugo, Irene, Irina (Germany)
Hugó (Hungary)
Dora, Irene, Ugo (Italy)
Dagne, Dagnis, Tautmilis, Teodora, Teofils (Latvia)
Dainora, Rimgaudas, Teodora (Lithuania)
Aron, Arve, Arvid (Norway)
Chryzant, Grażyna, Hugo, Hugon, Katarzyna, Teodora, Tolisław, Zbigniew, Zbyszko (Poland)
Maria (Romania)
Darya, Klavdia (Russia)
Hugo (Slovakia)
Hugo, Venancio (Spain)
Harald, Hervor (Sweden)
April, Arden, Argus, Diamond, Paris (USA)
Today is Also…
Day of Year: Day 92 of 2024; 274 days remaining in the year
ISO: Day 1 of week 14 of 2024
Celtic Tree Calendar: Fearn (Alder) [Day 16 of 28]
Chinese: Month 2 (Ding-Mao), Day 23 (Yi-Wei)
Chinese Year of the: Dragon 4722 (until January 29, 2025)
Hebrew: 22 Adair II 5784
Islamic: 22 Ramadan 1445
J Cal: 2 Cyan; Twosday [2 of 30]
Julian: 19 March 2024
Moon: 50%: 3rd Quarter
Positivist: 8 Archimedes (4th Month) [Euclid]
Runic Half Month: Ehwaz (Horse) [Day 7 of 15]
Season: Spring (Day 14 of 92)
Week: Last Week of March
Zodiac: Aries (Day 12 of 31)
Calendar Changes
April (Gregorian Calendar) [Month 4 of 12]
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So I just found out today that back in the late 1840s-1850s, the early LDS/Mormon church came up with their own alphabet.
𐐔𐐯𐑅𐐨𐑉𐐯𐐻
It was called the "Deseret alphabet" (if I'm remembering right, "Deseret" was also an early name used for the territory that we'd call Utah now, along with at least parts of what would end up becoming several surrounding states back before the current borders were drawn), and part of the goal was to have each letter represent one sound rather than the chaotic mish-mash of "every letter can make every sound, pretty much" that English using the Latin alphabet has going on. It also just looks kinda neat, so... that's at least two things going for it!
It's also interesting that letters whose name sounds like an existing word can be used in place of it rather than writing the whole thing out. Technically this is a thing in English with "I" and "A," but in the Deseret alphabet it also applies to a number of other words since, for example... the letter representing a B sound is named "Bee." So you'd literally just write "bee" (like the insect) as "B."
Which lead me to notice something.
𐐑
The letter P... or "Pee" (yes, Pee) ... is almost the symbol on Waluigi's hat.
I thought it was an exact match at first glance, but sadly it turns out that "Pee" has the branching part facing the opposite direction.
So Waluigi's hat symbol (an upside-down L) is actually closer to a capital Gamma from the Greek alphabet.
Γ
Oh well.
The thought that Waluigi was running around with a hat that literally just said "PEE" on it (and it's even yellow!) in an obscure language invented in the 1850s by Mormons was funny while it lasted...
#language#constructed language#deseret alphabet#mormon waluigi#the letter pee#sadly the symbol doesn't quiiiite match...
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Waluigi VS. Kermit Cell
#church of waluigi#waluigi meme#waluigi#waluigi time#nintendo memes#nintendo art#nintendo#dragon ball art#dragon ball z kakarot#dragon ball z#dragon ball#dbz kakarot#dbz#perfect cell#cell games#cell saga#meme art#manga meme#memes#meme#shitpost art#shitposting#shitpost#anime art#comic art#art
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“Waluigi is Athanasius kin”
—my roommate, with a take i never expected to exist or hear
#m#smash#ssb#church history#waluigi#this is the weirdest collection of tags ive ever made#athanasius#athanasius of alexandria#history#super smash bros
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Marco + Eva Religious Symbolism Effortpost: Three Key Moments/Motifs
“I Believe in Higher Powers, Yeerk”: Eva, Marco, the Protoevangelium, the Woman of the Apocalypse, and Related Iconography
The Protoevangelum is a Christian term for Genesis 3:15, towards the end of the Garden of Eden narrative. God says to the serpent “I will put enmity between you and the woman, and between your offspring and hers; he will strike your head, and you will strike his heel.” (NRSVCE)
Protoevangelium--”first Gospel”--is a specifically Christian term and is emphasized most in Catholic theology, in which this is said to be the first glimmer of Satan’s ultimate defeat by Christ, “the offspring of the woman.” The serpent strikes the offspring’s heel (the Crucifixion) and the offspring strikes the serpent’s head (Christ “saving us all from Satan’s power”, as the Christmas carol says.) Indeed, in earlier Bible translations based on St. Jerome’s Latin Vulgate, “he will strike your head” was “she will strike your head”--an error that nobody noticed for centuries because it wasn’t particularly important to the Catholic understanding of the passage, which has it refer to both Christ and Mary. Sin enters the world through Eve, and then the remedy for sin enters the world through the “New Eve” who sets right what Eve Original Flavor put wrong. Or who finishes what Eve Original Flavor started, if you’re into felix culpa theology, which I am. Anybody who’s paid attention to the lyrics of “Battle Hymn of the Republic” will also have heard “let the hero born of woman crush the serpent with His heel” in that context.
Anyway here’s Wonderwall Eva (note her name!!) and Marco killing Edriss 562 in Animorphs #45:
"Die!" she wheezed, eyes fixed on a small gray spot an inch from the edge.
Visser One!
<Mom, stop!>
She fell forward, arm extended, clutching...
"Die!"
The Bug ship flew in over the pool, blocking us from Dracon fire, hovering low just feet away.
My mother's face was distorted. Real human tears ran from her cheeks. Rage, pain, joy...
And then her hand squished the parasite.
But the slug was still alive. . . .
"No!"
I slammed my foot on the still-wriggling worm. And it was clear...
...it was clear that Visser One's journey had ended.
(Marco’s POV)
A final note on this: the image of the woman crushing the serpent’s head is especially important in Mexican Catholicism in particular.
Figure 1: Antonio de Torres’s painting “Virgin of Guadalupe”, showing the Virgin Mary closely matching the description of the “Woman of the Apocalypse’” from Revelation 12, trampling a snake (it’s there under her dress; in other versions of this image it’s a lot easier to see) and being held up by an angel.
Visser One’s “Crucifixion”: Eva Got Infested for Our Sins
I’m tempted not to elaborate on this at all because I’m so proud of the section subtitle but @nikosheba said she was specifically interested in my take so here goes.
The orthodox theology of Western Christianity (i.e. Protestantism and most of the Catholic Church) explains that Jesus’ crucifixion and resurrection weren’t only necessary for human salvation as a moral example or demonstration of God’s power, they actually involved Jesus taking a punishment (from God/Himself, Satan, or both, depending on the specific theological theory) that otherwise humanity as a whole would have taken. The famous “blasting rope to Waluigi hentai” tweet comes from this; Jesus dies and goes to hell not because He deserves it but because anybody who would masturbate to Waluigi does and Jesus can take it better than they can.
Figure 2: A tweet in which a gentleman named Sebastian Castillo observes, correctly, that “it’s catholic canon that in the garden of gethsemane jesus christ saw every sin committed by human beings which means that he watched a guy blasting rope to waluigi hentai and still decided to sacrifice himself for humanity. absolute legend”
Eva doesn’t get infested and almost killed along with her infestor/torturer/rapist “for humanity”, exactly--it doesn’t even preserve any of her son’s innocence, not that she (or he) shows any evidence of wanting it to--but it is a horrible, plot-driving, character-motivating experience that she’s presented as weathering a lot better than most of the younger characters could have, which I think is similar conceptually. (In-universe, Garoff or somebody might have decided on the crucifixion punishment as something Edriss’s host would have found particularly insulting, yet symbolically fitting--which is also an ironic punishment for Edriss herself with her tendency to LARP as the women she infests.)
Fear and Trembling in Santa Barbara: Marco, Eva, Abraham, Isaac, and the Inherent Homicidality of Family Hiking Trips
(@visseredriss made the post that turned me on to this so, you know, thanks for making #30 even more upsetting than it already was, I guess!)
In Genesis 22, Abraham infamously arranges a hiking trip with his son Isaac so that he can sacrifice him to God at the end, which he doesn’t go through with (although an angel provides him with a ram to sacrifice instead). In Animorphs #30, Marco infamously arranges a hiking trip with his infested mother so that he can shove her off a cliff at the end, which he doesn’t go through with (although Jake does it for him because this is a very normal series of funny animal books for ten-year-olds.).
The story in Genesis is understood a little differently in (modern) Christianity and Judaism. The usual modern Christian understanding focuses on Abraham as the active protagonist of the story and presents it as a test of faith in which the “reward” for faith is the suspension of the test. This is, in my opinion, a misreading derived from Kierkegaard’s Fear and Trembling; the early Christian interpretation was closer to at least one Jewish interpretation, in which the protagonist of the episode is Isaac, the faith tested is his (in being willing to die) rather than his father’s (in being willing to kill), and Abraham going through with it is unlikely from the start because God has previously promised that Abraham will have grandchildren through Isaac. (St. Paul’s Epistle to the Hebrews claims that Abraham was under the impression that, even if he did kill Isaac, God would simply raise Isaac from the dead--but then, St. Paul would say that, wouldn’t he?)
However, Kierkegaard’s exegesis is, as much as it pains me to say this about a character I love, Typical Marco Bullshit, and I would not be at all surprised if the parallel between Kierkegaard’s Abraham and Applegate’s Marco being willing to “suspend the ethical” to pursue what they see as a pre-moral imperative (obeying direct commands from God; winning the war against the Yeerks) is there for a reason. Even if it wasn’t deliberate, if you’ve taken an intro to existentialism (or even intro to Western philosophy) course you’ll have encountered Fear and Trembling; it’s there in the back of your mind, and “so then he led his favorite family member up the mountain to kill them in service of greater aim, and his reward for being willing to do this was that he ended up not having to do this” is never going to be an entirely accidental plot/thematic point.
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(Wario heard the commotion and saw the two nightmarish animatronics. In response, after affirming they where enemies…well…everyone was surprised at what happened next.)
Waluigi, for some reason dressed like a Carnival Barker: Place for bets for who wins, people, place your bets! One side of a pair of nasty animal bot bozos and the other is our stellar friend Wario! Place your bets!!!
(Some of them did, but most where just confused. Later, at the time Nightmare Bonnie got back up, the nightmarish rabbit robot could only watch as Wario reacted by grabbing Bonnie by the legs, and then spinning him around until he threw the robot rabbit an insane distance away, yelling out “Get out of here!” as he did so. The same fate befell Nightmare Chica, with Wario instead telling the nightmarish chicken robot to “Have a Rotten Day!” when he threw her. It was…not what was expected, but two threats where now dealt with (with some scrap that flew off as Wario twirled both of them around to mess with to boot), and it at least took place outside of the mountain. The impact site of the nightmarish robots, however, was somewhere that was passively pulled in (later, it would be determined that Exdeath is to be blamed for that), and would prove to have…well, by the standard of this world, the things that where a Grimm threat to this passively pulled in world wouldn’t be a direct issue, but given they could be modified by people of this new world and in the merged world it was pulled into people like Shockwave existed, it would lead to interesting results, the only clue of what was to come being a young lass with silver eyes briefly spotting the flying animatronics. Meanwhile, havoc did ensue as Entropy, no longer in disguise, fought the new security forces, who somehow took the fight to a testing chamber that could take the impacts of a fight. Didn’t stop Odalia from finding the conflict to be needlessly chaotic)
(A.N. Since it seems like you’re familiar with RoosterTeeth, I’ll let you guess what I subtly introduced in an abnormal way. Really, could Wario hammer-throwing an animatronic to the introduced place not be anything but abnormal)
(Note: I'm familiar with the series you're mentioning but I'm more familiar with a certain battle between reds and blues)
*Entropy had discovered that not only could Church change the shape of the gauntlets into various weapons but could fire currents of electricity as well...He then sees his potential ticket out of here, a frenzy whisp having been captured and used for study*
Entropy, after absorbing both the new jury rigged cooling system and frenzy whisp: Let's have some fun~...(Frenzy!!!) *He then morphed into a beastly shadow creature and began tearing his way out of the facility while killing a few unlucky workers as well*
Jorge: Uhh...This isn't coming out of our check is it? (Odalia, while incredibly annoyed: You let an incredibly dangerous bot of our origins escape while causing needless destruction to our facility...What. Do. You. Think?...) Uhh...No?...
(Meanwhile with the silver eyed lass)
*She had curiously decided to check on what that was and saw...two heavily damaged robots of unknown origin...The rabbit attempted to attack but was shot in a panic by the huntress*
Ruby: What was that?!?
(Meanwhile with the heroes)
Jackrow, after going outside to check on how far they went: Huh...Maybe they can be helpful for our cause!...Wait when did those areas get here? I would've remembered seeing a high tech city earlier...
*Multiple Grimm were captured by both The Decepticons and The Gray Horde to study and experiment with*
RXQ, secretly watching The Gray Horde capture multiple Beowulfs: The boss isn't gonna like this...
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im building a waluigi church in my friend group's smp
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Things my friends have said out of context:
-”so i know this is heresy, but i bought muffins”
-*at a dog, in that ‘i’m talking to a dog’ voice* “do you smell PESTILENCE?”
-Them: “WWPD?“ Me: “What does that mean?” Them: “What Would Pterodactyls Do?”
-”Shrek is a good boy.”
-*about the movie Shrek, said without a hint of irony* “I hate that movie! It ruined Smash Mouth! No one takes Smash Mouth seriously anymore because of that green bastard, fuck Mike Myers dude!”
-”I HAVE 3 WEAKNESSES: WEENIS, WOMEN, WALUIGI!”
-”Starscream’s landing gear penis”
- “REJECT HUMANITY, EMBRACE THE CRAB, CRAB IS GOD!”
-”We could make a religion out of that and just fill a church with horseshoe crabs.”
-*on the phone with her mom* “Yeah, Mom? The anti drug guy at school doesn’t know anything about weed and I yelled at him, can you come pick me up?”
-”You don’t have the testes to be the besties.” *smashes rock with hammer*
-”Thanos, Shrek, and Lord English are all related”
-”SHREK IS A LIBERTARIAN!”
-”Thanos would be that asshole business major relative that tries to sell you bitcoin at family functions and tries to play the devil’s advocate.”
-*pointing aggressively at a toad* “H E, H E, H E!”
- “I love you, but the way you park your car is a war crime and a menace to society.”
-”MY WIFE IS IN A CREVICE!”
-”it’s gay pride month, tell me what a twunk is!”
- “I am this close to going cottegecore.”
-”oH, IS IT BEE DAY, LUV?”
-*on the phone* “I found this bird that might belong to you and he is unwell?”
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𝕔𝕚𝕝𝕝𝕚𝕒𝕟 𝕜𝕖𝕝𝕝𝕪 → 𝕙𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕔𝕒𝕟𝕠𝕟𝕤
cillian can’t drive. he doesn’t have a liscence and has no interest in getting one. he bikes pretty much everywhere and when he doesn’t bike, he walks.
cillian can’t see for shit, he’s had the same pair of glasses since 7th grade but won’t wear them because they make him look like a dork. he won’t wear contacts because he thinks touching his eyes would be gross.
cillian’s favorite band is weezer. his favorite weezer song is el scorcho bc of course it is.
cillian went through a period of time where he started every morning shift by downing a 5 hour energy and eating a churro. he paid for neither of these things. how he’s even still alive is a mystery to me.
cillian really desperately wanted to be a cool skater boy in middle school but he absolutely sucked at it. he suffered a lot of skinned knees the summer between sixth and seventh grade.
the majority of cillian’s wardrobe is made up entirely of finds at good will. he owns a lot of dumb t-shirts that say shit like “church of the holy mother annual barbecue 2016” or “women love me, fish fear me”
he’s had the same pair of beat up nikes since junior year and he’s never bothered to replace them.
one afternoon while bored and stoned, cillian figured out how to set a custom ringtone for his contacts. jude’s ringtone is handy by weird al. cillian thinks he’s funny. ( @judetaylorhq )
cillian’s phone screen i cracked as fuck but he refuses to replace it because it still works.
in a vain attempt to impress his dad, cillian decided to get a tiny tattoo of a shamrock on his ankle when he turned 18. his dad did not give a shit.
they used to call him “garbage can” in high school because he would finish anyone’s meal for them.
cillian prefers weed over alcohol and doesn’t drink alcohol nearly as often. he has a pretty low tolerance and gets drunk very quickly.
cillian’s alcohol of choice is fireball but when he’s out and feeling “fancy” he’ll order the dumbest novelty drink on the menu.
cillian always mains as waluigi in mario kart. always.
cillian’s favorite band is weezer. his favorite song by weezer is el scorcho bc of course it is.
cillian’s favorite flavor of gatorade is lemon like aka yellow.
cillian unironically likes the band sugar ray.
cillian’s favorite tv show is it’s always sunny in philadelphia.
cillian’s favorite movie is ace ventura pet detective.
cillian’s favorite flavor of slurpee is cherry.
cillian’s candy of choice is sour gummy worms.
cillian hates rich people.
cillian hates “the man.” “the man” is pretty much anyone who tells cillian what to do.
cillian is a big sucker for flavored lip balm. his favorite flavor is strawberry.
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My Hella Mega Acknowledgement Acceptance Speech
Which I will orate upon acknowledgement by the Hella Mega Tour during the Boston show
There once was a thing named Zwamby
or should I say I was set free
I love Billie Joe
Pete Wentz is my hoe
And Weezer means nothing to me
I’m Zwamby.
My pronoun is it.
I’m less of a gender
and more of a forced to be reckoned with.
My given name is Louise,
but Zwamby is who I truly am.
I am known by Green Day fans as whatshername,
Fall Out Boy fans as
Wilson,
and my mother as
a pain in the butt.
I was a sleeper agent for the revolution,
but every time I try and start one,
they throw me in McLean’s.
McLeans’s?
More like McLame’s!
Can’t spell infamous without
famous.
Can’t spell notorious without
nooot.
Let me take you into the ZPR,
zipper for short.
It stands for Zwamby’s Parallel Reality.
I used to think that
Pete Wentz from Fall Out Boy
was God
(Talk about “a loaded God complex.”)
Billie Joe Armstrong from Green Day
was Jesus
and Rivers Cuomo from Weezer
was the Holy Ghost
I’ve recently come to my senses. That's impossible! Rivers Cuomo was a recent development in the zipper, I will confess, and I never really bought it. Even delusions can be wrong sometimes. I now know that all of us
(except for Rivers Cuomo)
Just kidding
*in a funny voice*
even Rivers Cuomo
Are all actually demons.
In the ancient Greek sense, defined as
“a supernatural being whose nature is intermediate between that of a God and that of a human being.”
Merriam-Webster Dictionary.
Demigods, if you will.
Billie Joe was my first husband in this life but Pete Wentz is my Ultimate Soulmate and
current husband; Rivers Cuomo is just a swell guy
I cocked it, and I’m about to pull the trigger.
This is going to get a little iffy but I’ll keep it clinical.
On the winter solstice of 2017, I lit five candles in a pentagram formation and copulated with two astral projections; Billie Joe Armstrong and Pete Wentz. Remember, we’re in the zipper, so we can't make babies. But I also didn't really know if it was really them, so we'll call them Wete Pentz and Jillie Boe
I did not copulate with Civers Ruomo.
A couple of days before my next period, I bought a three pack of pregnancy tests.
I peed on one, and it was negative. However, Wete Pentz’s voice in my head kept insisting I was pregnant, so I knew that that test was what The Man wanted me to believe, and I peed on the other two. It’s important to mention that I was abstaining from the real deal and just sticking to astral projections because they, frankly, did a better job than your average person, and because I was going through a lot emotionally, having been hijacked by Zwamby for the second time. Instantly, it looked like the Wete Pentz one and the Jillie Boe one were duds. However, within the time window, because there's a Time Window for pregnancy tests, they became positive.
“Two out of three ain’t bad.”
Interestingly enough, Champion by Fall Out Boy was released earlier that year the day after the summer solstice of 2017. In Champion, Pete writes “I’m calling you from the future to let you know we made a mistake.” Can you guess what the mistake was? It was a baby! Therefore, the zipper overlapped with reality!
It was real life. It is real life. I was pregnant. Without having actually copulated.
Somehow I knew it was
the antichrist
aka
Wajesus
(like Waluigi).
Honestly, all the antichrist is
is “a person or force seen as opposing Christ or the Christian church”
Oxford English Dictionary.
And if you think there isn't corruption and evil in the church, you’re delusional. Anyway, Wajesus is a good thing!
Unfortunately, due to the over 2,000 mg of psych medication, the pack a day, and the binge drinking, Wajeezy didn’t stand a chance. But it happened! The astral ejaculate conception happened. On the winter solstice of 2017.
Every single human has the capacity to astral project into the fifth dimension, which is: everywhere, everything, and everyone on different planes, pocket dimensions, parallel universes, and alternate realities beyond linear time (like the zipper).
All fanfiction is real somewhere.
We access the fifth dimension if we are any of the following:
drugged, dead, delusional,
unconscious, and/or imaginative.
D-D-D-U-I
Socrates was right, there is a higher plane of innate knowledge that we can access, and I’m on that level. Plato’s cave is just an allegory for the spiritual shift between the fourth dimension, spacetime, and fifth dimension, which I just explained, keep up. E=mc²? More like E/c=mc because energy and mass are inversely related by a factor of the speed of light thus they're on the same scale and dark matter is just photons at absolute zero.
I busted out of Plato’s cave with a cannon, and I had my third eye ripped open with a crowbar.
I’ve seen the truth,
I’ve seen it all,
and this is not how life should be.
We are enslaved by capitalism,
we are oppressed by the powers that be,
and we are ignored and imprisoned by those who claim to protect us.
In Massachusetts,
they can chuck you in a mental hospital
for 3 days
for no reason other than because they said so. We need to fight back.
We need to be on the right side of history.
As Billie Joe says,
“I don’t want to live in the modern world.”
Yeah, neither do I.
But we can fix this!
The government isn’t going to like what I'm about to say, but what the heck has this administration ever done for me?
And what can they possibly do TO me?
Lock me up in jail
for civil disobedience?
Kill me
for starting a riot?
Death is but a sweet release from this suffering.
If you want to die
because the world is so tragic,
here is a reason to live!
To fight!
To win!
We need change!
We need freedom!
We need a revolution!
“Are you smelling that shit?
Eau du Resistance”
Consider me a threat to the system!
“I don’t care!“
The revolution is LIVE!
Spurch
#hella mega#hella mega tour#hellamegatour#zwamby#fpwh#the zipper#demons#demigods#antichrist#wajeezy#pete wentz#fall out boy#fob#billie joe armstrong#bja#pw#green day#rivers cuomo#Weezer#acceptance speech#mania#delusions#delusional#delusion#folie a deux#oh Pete#we can do this
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Holidays 7.21
Holidays
Blessing of the Waters & Whitstable Oyster Festival begins (Kent, England) [ends 7.31]
Coldest Day Ever Day (Lowest Recorded Temperature Day)
First Day of the World (Egypt)
International Drug Users Remembrance Day
International Waluigi Day
International Zine Library Day
Invite An Alien To Live With You Day
Kazanskaya (Russia)
Lake Superior Day
Leo zodiac sign begins
Liberation Day (Guam)
Mary Wilson Day (Detroit, Michigan)
Melon Day (French Republic)
Monkey Appreciation Day
National Be Someone Day
National Craft for Your Local Shelters Day
National Edward/Eduardo Day
National Law Day (Argentina)
National Little Black Dress Day
National Meow Day
National No Makeup Day
National Pyjama Day (Australia)
National Race Photos Day
National Tug-of-War Day
No Pet Store Puppies Day
Racial Harmony Day (Singapore)
Sapporo Summer Festival begins (Japan) [Until 8.20]
Schoelcher Day (French West Indies, Martinique)
Summer Kazanskaya (Russia)
Take a Monkey to Lunch Day
Tim Duncan Day (Texas)
Twin-O-Rama
Uterine Fibroid Awareness Day
Veterans Administration Day
World Body Painting Festival begins (Austria) [Thru 7.23]
World Day of the Dog
Zero HIV Stigma Day
Food & Drink Celebrations
Belgian Fries Day
California Craft Beer Week begins
Legal Drinking Age Day
Make Your Own Pop Tart Day
National Crème Brûlée Day (also 7.27)
National Junk Food Day
National Lamington Cake Day (Australia)
Third Friday in July
Big Sky Games begin (Montana) [3rd Friday]
Gentse Feesten begins (Ghent, Belgium) [Friday before 3rd Sunday]
Lindenfest (Rhineland, Germany) [Begins 3rd Friday]
National Park & Recreation Professionals Day [3rd Friday]
National Property Managers Day (Australia) [3rd Friday]
Pflasterspektakel Linz (Street Musician Festival; Germany) [3rd Friday thru Sunday]
Sherwood Robin Hood Festival begins (Oregon) [3rd Friday; ends Sunday]
Tolpuddle Martyrs Festival begins (Dorset, UK) [3rd Friday; ends Sunday]
Wrong Days in Wright (Wright, Montana) [3rd Friday & Saturday]
Independence Days
Belgium (from the United Netherlands, 1831)
Feast Days
Alan Moore Day (Church of the SubGenius; Saint)
Albert John Luthuli (Episcopal Church)
Arbogast (Christian; Saint)
Barhadbesciabas (Christian; Saint)
Carista (Day of Peace in the Family; Pagan)
Carlos of Brazil (Brazilian Catholic Apostolic Church)
Carlos Schwabe (Artology)
Daniel (Catholic Church)
De Foe (Positivist; Saint)
Drukpa Tsheshi (Buddhism; Sikkim, India)
Feast of Damo (Daughter of the Greek sage Pythagoras, keeper of the secrets of philosophy)
First Sermon of Lord Buddha (Buddhist; Bhutan)
Lawrence of Brindisi (Christian; Saint)
Lovis Corinth (Artology)
The Lucaria (Festival of the Grove to Sucellus, Gaulish God of Alcohol); Ancient Rome) [also 2.1 & 7.19]
Praxedes (Christian; Saint)
Primavera Sauce Day (Pastafarian)
Scotty McSock (Muppetism)
Shabbat Chazon (Black Sabbath; Judaism) [4 Av]
Victor of Marseilles (Christian; Saint)
Lucky & Unlucky Days
Sakimake (先負 Japan) [Bad luck in the morning, good luck in the afternoon.]
Tycho Brahe Unlucky Day (Scandinavia) [27 of 37]
Umu Limnu (Evil Day; Babylonian Calendar; 34 of 60)
Unglückstage (Unlucky Day; Pennsylvania Dutch) [20 of 30]
Very Unlucky Day (Grafton’s Manual of 1565) [34 of 60]
Premieres
Appetite for Destruction, by Guns N’ Roses (Album; 1987)
Bad Case of Loving You, by Robert Palmer (Song; 1979)
Barbary-Coast Bunny (WB LT Cartoon; 1956)
Barbie (Film; 2023)
Blind Faith, by Blind Faith (Album; 1969)
Clerks II (Film; 2006)
Clueless (Film; 1995)
Come Together, by The Beatles recorded (Song; 1969)
The Daily Show (Late Night TV Series; 1996)
Dirty, by Sonic Youth (Album; 1992)
Do the Right Thing (Film; 1989)
Dunkirk (Film; 2017)
Fleabag (TV Series; 2016)
The Girl Without Hands (Animated Film; 2017)
Landing on Water, by Neil Young (Album; 1986)
The Lord of the Rings (Novel; 1954)
Monster House (Animated Film; 2006)
Oppenheimer (Film; 2023)
Ozark (TV Series; 2017)
The Princess Diaries (Film; 2001)
Rescue Me (TV Series; 2004)
Scooby-Doo! And Kiss: Rock and Roll Mystery (WB Animated Film; 2015)
Shag (Film: 1989)
Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band (Film; 1978)
The Shootist (Film; 1976)
The Slick Chick (WB LT Cartoon; 1962)
The Soft Parade, by The Doors (Album; 1969)
Stormy Weather (Film; 1943)
The Story of Doctor Dolittle, by Hugh Lofting (Novel; 1920)
The Treasure of the Sierra Madre, by B. Traven (Novel; 1927)
UHF (Film; 1989)
Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets (Film; 2017)
What Lies Beneath (Film; 2000)
Today’s Name Days
Daniel, Daniela, Julia, Laurentius (Austria)
Danica, Danijel, Lovro (Croatia)
Vítězslav (Czech Republic)
Evenus (Denmark)
Tambet, Tulev (Estonia)
Hanna, Hanne, Hannele, Jenna, Jenni, Joanna, Johanna, Jonna (Finland)
Rodolphe, Térence, Victor (France)
Daniel (Germany)
Dániel, Daniella (Hungary)
Cesira, Lorenzo, Vittore (Italy)
Dabris, Daniels, Meldra, Melisa (Latvia)
Danielius, Lionginas, Rimvydas, Rimvydė (Lithuania)
Jane, Janne, Johanne (Norway)
Andrzej, Benedykt, Daniel, Paulina, Prakseda, Prokop, Stojsław, Wiktor, Wiktoriusz (Poland)
Daniel (Slovakia)
Daniel, Lorenzo, Práxedes (Spain)
Johanna (Sweden)
Ernesto, Vic, Vick, Victor, Vik, Viktor, Vittorio (Universal)
Alma, Erna, Ernest, Ernestina, Ernesto, Ernie, Wesley, West, Westin, Westley, Weston (USA)
Today is Also…
Day of Year: Day 202 of 2024; 163 days remaining in the year
ISO: Day 5 of week 29 of 2023
Celtic Tree Calendar: Tinne (Holly) [Day 12 of 28]
Chinese: Month 6 (Ji-Wei), Day 4 (Geng-Chen)
Chinese Year of the: Rabbit 4721 (until February 10, 2024)
Hebrew: 3 Av 5783
Islamic: 3 Muharram 1445
J Cal: 22 Lux; Oneday [22 of 30]
Julian: 8 July 2023
Moon: 13%: Waxing Crescent
Positivist: 6 Dante (8th Month) [De Foe]
Runic Half Month: Ur (Primal Strength) [Day 8 of 15]
Season: Summer (Day 31 of 94)
Zodiac: Cancer (Day 31 of 31)
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Holidays 7.21
Holidays
Blessing of the Waters & Whitstable Oyster Festival begins (Kent, England) [ends 7.31]
Coldest Day Ever Day (Lowest Recorded Temperature Day)
First Day of the World (Egypt)
International Drug Users Remembrance Day
International Waluigi Day
International Zine Library Day
Invite An Alien To Live With You Day
Kazanskaya (Russia)
Lake Superior Day
Leo zodiac sign begins
Liberation Day (Guam)
Mary Wilson Day (Detroit, Michigan)
Melon Day (French Republic)
Monkey Appreciation Day
National Be Someone Day
National Craft for Your Local Shelters Day
National Edward/Eduardo Day
National Law Day (Argentina)
National Little Black Dress Day
National Meow Day
National No Makeup Day
National Pyjama Day (Australia)
National Race Photos Day
National Tug-of-War Day
No Pet Store Puppies Day
Racial Harmony Day (Singapore)
Sapporo Summer Festival begins (Japan) [Until 8.20]
Schoelcher Day (French West Indies, Martinique)
Summer Kazanskaya (Russia)
Take a Monkey to Lunch Day
Tim Duncan Day (Texas)
Twin-O-Rama
Uterine Fibroid Awareness Day
Veterans Administration Day
World Body Painting Festival begins (Austria) [Thru 7.23]
World Day of the Dog
Zero HIV Stigma Day
Food & Drink Celebrations
Belgian Fries Day
California Craft Beer Week begins
Legal Drinking Age Day
Make Your Own Pop Tart Day
National Crème Brûlée Day (also 7.27)
National Junk Food Day
National Lamington Cake Day (Australia)
Third Friday in July
Big Sky Games begin (Montana) [3rd Friday]
Gentse Feesten begins (Ghent, Belgium) [Friday before 3rd Sunday]
Lindenfest (Rhineland, Germany) [Begins 3rd Friday]
National Park & Recreation Professionals Day [3rd Friday]
National Property Managers Day (Australia) [3rd Friday]
Pflasterspektakel Linz (Street Musician Festival; Germany) [3rd Friday thru Sunday]
Sherwood Robin Hood Festival begins (Oregon) [3rd Friday; ends Sunday]
Tolpuddle Martyrs Festival begins (Dorset, UK) [3rd Friday; ends Sunday]
Wrong Days in Wright (Wright, Montana) [3rd Friday & Saturday]
Independence Days
Belgium (from the United Netherlands, 1831)
Feast Days
Alan Moore Day (Church of the SubGenius; Saint)
Albert John Luthuli (Episcopal Church)
Arbogast (Christian; Saint)
Barhadbesciabas (Christian; Saint)
Carista (Day of Peace in the Family; Pagan)
Carlos of Brazil (Brazilian Catholic Apostolic Church)
Carlos Schwabe (Artology)
Daniel (Catholic Church)
De Foe (Positivist; Saint)
Drukpa Tsheshi (Buddhism; Sikkim, India)
Feast of Damo (Daughter of the Greek sage Pythagoras, keeper of the secrets of philosophy)
First Sermon of Lord Buddha (Buddhist; Bhutan)
Lawrence of Brindisi (Christian; Saint)
Lovis Corinth (Artology)
The Lucaria (Festival of the Grove to Sucellus, Gaulish God of Alcohol); Ancient Rome) [also 2.1 & 7.19]
Praxedes (Christian; Saint)
Primavera Sauce Day (Pastafarian)
Scotty McSock (Muppetism)
Shabbat Chazon (Black Sabbath; Judaism) [4 Av]
Victor of Marseilles (Christian; Saint)
Lucky & Unlucky Days
Sakimake (先負 Japan) [Bad luck in the morning, good luck in the afternoon.]
Tycho Brahe Unlucky Day (Scandinavia) [27 of 37]
Umu Limnu (Evil Day; Babylonian Calendar; 34 of 60)
Unglückstage (Unlucky Day; Pennsylvania Dutch) [20 of 30]
Very Unlucky Day (Grafton’s Manual of 1565) [34 of 60]
Premieres
Appetite for Destruction, by Guns N’ Roses (Album; 1987)
Bad Case of Loving You, by Robert Palmer (Song; 1979)
Barbary-Coast Bunny (WB LT Cartoon; 1956)
Barbie (Film; 2023)
Blind Faith, by Blind Faith (Album; 1969)
Clerks II (Film; 2006)
Clueless (Film; 1995)
Come Together, by The Beatles recorded (Song; 1969)
The Daily Show (Late Night TV Series; 1996)
Dirty, by Sonic Youth (Album; 1992)
Do the Right Thing (Film; 1989)
Dunkirk (Film; 2017)
Fleabag (TV Series; 2016)
The Girl Without Hands (Animated Film; 2017)
Landing on Water, by Neil Young (Album; 1986)
The Lord of the Rings (Novel; 1954)
Monster House (Animated Film; 2006)
Oppenheimer (Film; 2023)
Ozark (TV Series; 2017)
The Princess Diaries (Film; 2001)
Rescue Me (TV Series; 2004)
Scooby-Doo! And Kiss: Rock and Roll Mystery (WB Animated Film; 2015)
Shag (Film: 1989)
Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band (Film; 1978)
The Shootist (Film; 1976)
The Slick Chick (WB LT Cartoon; 1962)
The Soft Parade, by The Doors (Album; 1969)
Stormy Weather (Film; 1943)
The Story of Doctor Dolittle, by Hugh Lofting (Novel; 1920)
The Treasure of the Sierra Madre, by B. Traven (Novel; 1927)
UHF (Film; 1989)
Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets (Film; 2017)
What Lies Beneath (Film; 2000)
Today’s Name Days
Daniel, Daniela, Julia, Laurentius (Austria)
Danica, Danijel, Lovro (Croatia)
Vítězslav (Czech Republic)
Evenus (Denmark)
Tambet, Tulev (Estonia)
Hanna, Hanne, Hannele, Jenna, Jenni, Joanna, Johanna, Jonna (Finland)
Rodolphe, Térence, Victor (France)
Daniel (Germany)
Dániel, Daniella (Hungary)
Cesira, Lorenzo, Vittore (Italy)
Dabris, Daniels, Meldra, Melisa (Latvia)
Danielius, Lionginas, Rimvydas, Rimvydė (Lithuania)
Jane, Janne, Johanne (Norway)
Andrzej, Benedykt, Daniel, Paulina, Prakseda, Prokop, Stojsław, Wiktor, Wiktoriusz (Poland)
Daniel (Slovakia)
Daniel, Lorenzo, Práxedes (Spain)
Johanna (Sweden)
Ernesto, Vic, Vick, Victor, Vik, Viktor, Vittorio (Universal)
Alma, Erna, Ernest, Ernestina, Ernesto, Ernie, Wesley, West, Westin, Westley, Weston (USA)
Today is Also…
Day of Year: Day 202 of 2024; 163 days remaining in the year
ISO: Day 5 of week 29 of 2023
Celtic Tree Calendar: Tinne (Holly) [Day 12 of 28]
Chinese: Month 6 (Ji-Wei), Day 4 (Geng-Chen)
Chinese Year of the: Rabbit 4721 (until February 10, 2024)
Hebrew: 3 Av 5783
Islamic: 3 Muharram 1445
J Cal: 22 Lux; Oneday [22 of 30]
Julian: 8 July 2023
Moon: 13%: Waxing Crescent
Positivist: 6 Dante (8th Month) [De Foe]
Runic Half Month: Ur (Primal Strength) [Day 8 of 15]
Season: Summer (Day 31 of 94)
Zodiac: Cancer (Day 31 of 31)
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Walpurgisnacht
Hey @beerecordings @florenceisfalling, you remember that silly conversation you guys had a few days ago? I did a thing!
2017
“Do we plan to have a bonfire tomorrow?” Henrik asked, glancing up from his book.
“Huh?” Sean replied. “I mean, I guess we could. Any reason?”
Henrik looked confused. “Did I not get the date correct? It is the thirtieth tomorrow, isn’t it?”
“Yeah, and?”
Henrik sat up, closing his book. “Do you not do Walpurgisnacht in Ireland?”
“What, like the big baddy from Madoka Magica?” Jackie piped up from the couch.
Henrik pinched the bridge of his nose in reply. “Gott gibt mir kraft.” he muttered. “No, Jackie, not like the anime. Saint Walburga’s feast. Hexennacht. Whatever you want to call it.”
Sean shook his head. “Never heard of it. But yeah, sure, I’m always down for a bonfire. What exactly are we celebrating?”
“Ah, I have not been to church in awhile, but I believe she battles against sickness and pests. I vaguely remember something about oil. Today it is mostly an excuse for hoodlums to make problems for everyone. Graffiti, vandalism, you know.”
“Oh, so like how Halloween is back in the States?”
Sean glanced at Chase. “I thought you guys just did the candy thing?”
Chase scoffed. “Hell no, Halloween is all about eggs and toilet paper once you’re old enough.”
Henrik shook his head. “You Americans. But yes, I suppose it is similar. For a select few.”
Sean raised an eyebrow. “Careful, all that condescension will get to you one day. I still don’t see what any of this has to do with bonfires.”
“Sean, I thought you were raised Catholic? How do you not know this?”
Sean threw his hands in the air. “There’s a bajillion saints, Hen. No one person can memorize all of them. Why the fire?”
Henrik frowned suddenly. “Ach, my brain is shorting out. Hexen. What is that in english?”
“Hexes? Spells?” Chase supplied.
“No, no, the people.”
“Witches?”
“Yes!” Henrik leaned back. “Witches. The bonfire is because in the old days, they would burn...ah…” he turned awkwardly to the corner of the room by the bookshelf.
Marvin had a shit eating grin spanning ear to ear. “No, Schneep, by all means, continue.” he said teasingly.
Jackie sat up with a gasp. “We should have a witch hunt tomorrow!”
“Uhh, it won’t be much of a ‘hunt’.” Marvin said. “You all know where my bedroom is.”
“And technically the actual feast isn’t until Sunday.” Henrik added.
“Okay then, so we make some rules. Like, not until after breakfast. And no hiding in your room all day.”
Marvin stood still for a few moments. Then he shrugged. “You know what? Fuck it, sure. First one to hug me on Sunday gets...I dunno, I’ll take you out for drinks or something.”
“Wait, first one?” Sean asked. “Are we all doing this? Why?”
“Family bonding!” Jackie yelled.
“Sure, ‘cause nothing says ‘family bonding’ like trying to tackle each other for an entire day.” snorted Chase.
Jackie turned to Marvin, grinning even wider than the magician had been moments before. “I’m gonna hug the shit out of you on Sunday.”
“Try it, spandex.”
2018
When Jameson walked into the kitchen with the breakfast dishes, Jackie and Chase were using the breakfast bar to stretch. He shook his head, dropping the dishes in the sink.
“Is there any reason for the calisthenics, gents?” he signed.
“It’s May first.” Chase replied, his voice muffled by his thigh.
“And?”
Jackie bent backwards to face him. “We do this thing for Wali- Walspi- fuck.”
“Walpurgisnacht.” Chase said.
“Right. That.”
“I’m sorry, I still don’t follow.” Jameson signed. “Isn’t that the German May Day? When they have campfires?”
“We do it different in this family. We’re having ourselves a good old fashioned witch hunt!”
Jameson blinked. “What?”
Chase stood up from his spot on the floor. “First one to hug Marv after breakfast wins. No serious damage or drawing blood. No weapons, super strength, or bribery. Other than that, all bets are off.”
“Jack won last year on a technicality, but this year, I’m ready!” Jackie declared.
Chase rolled his eyes. “It wasn’t a technicality, you’re just a sore loser.” He glanced back at Jameson. “Marvin shifted into a cat for most of the day. He was hanging around out back, and Sean went to cuddle the cat without knowing who it was.”
“...I see.” Jameson signed slowly. “Well, what about me? I can do magic as well.”
Chase and Jackie froze. Then their faces broke into matching smiles. “New rules,” Chase said. “First person to hug Marv and Jamie wins.”
Jameson’s eyes widened, then in a blink, he vanished.
“Hey!” Chase yelled, running into the living room. “No time jumping! That’s cheating!”
Jackie’s laughter coming from behind him was borderline maniacal.
2019
“Henrik!”
“Aah!” He lurched forward as the sudden noise woke him up. “Was?”
Chase and Jackie were standing in the doorway. Jackie winced as he saw that Henrik was still in bed. “Shit, sorry Schneep, I forgot you had a late shift last night.”
Henrik waved a hand. “It’s alright, I slept enough. Is everything okay? What do you two need?”
Jackie plopped onto the bed while Chase pulled over his desk chair. “We need a game plan.”
“....for what, exactly?”
“The thing! Waluigi night! Witch hunt!”
“Neither of us managed to win last year,” Chase added. “We need to make sure that doesn’t happen.”
Henrik blinked a couple times. “You did that without me?”
“Is that bad?” Jackie asked.
‘No, no, I’m just surprised. I didn’t think..” He shook his head. “Game plan. Right. Did you change any of the rules while I was gone?”
“Jamie counts now too, you need to get both of’em to win.”
Henrik sat up straighter. “Alright, so first things first…”
=:=:=:=
By the afternoon, all three of them had managed to hug Jameson, who was now reading in the living room. But no one had seen Marvin since breakfast. The others figured he’d just upped the ante this year, but personally, JJ was starting to worry a bit. Marvin had seemed impish when they talked yesterday, like he was planning to spend the day taunting them. Popping in and out, always vanishing at the last second. Not disappearing completely. Jameson finished his cup of tea and stood up. Marvin’s room wasn’t off limits to him, so what was the harm in checking on him?
He passed Chase on the stairs. The American was whacking his cap, trying to brush cobwebs off it. He smiled at Jameson. “Nothing in the attic. You two really brought it this year.”
JJ smiled back. “I’m just going to see if Marvin’s in his room,” he signed.
“Gotcha. If you find him, could you give him one of these for me?” Chase asked, flipping the bird. Jameson laughed, and climbed the rest of the stairs.
He passed Jackie’s room, which had loud music and thumping sounds coming from within. Sounded like he was working out to let off some steam.
Jameson knocked thrice on Marvin’s door, the signal he used to identify himself when out of sight. There was no reply. He frowned, trying again. On the third knock, the door creaked open, with no one behind it.
That was definitely worrying. Marvin never left his door unlocked. His room had too many unstable spells and in-progress potions, it was dangerous for any of them to randomly burst in.
Jameson carefully stepped in. He continued knocking, to no avail. The only light source came from an open laptop. The light wavered as the screen glitched and shifted. Jameson’s eyes widened as he read the message.
D͇̖o̼͍͚ ͘I̪ ͙̭w͇͈̺̘̭͓̻͞i͚̲̫̪͙n̛̦͍͎̣͚͔ ̙t͇̱ḫ͇̖͝e̹͕̣͕̭͓̞ ̹̹̩͍̲ẉ̣i̙̪̪̤t̲̱̱̱̞͈͖͡c̸͖͚̦̼h̟̻͕̙̙͕ ̷h̘̩͕̭̤͎͖un̸̘̖̰͇ț̯?̰
He grabbed the computer and ran downstairs.
=:=:=:=
After that, the hours flew by in a flurry. Jackie managed to track the signal provided, but it took him until after supper to do so. Chase spent most of that time comforting an (understandably) distraught Henrik, who had numerous panic attacks and more than one shutdown. That left Jameson to do nothing but pace and fret, caught up in his thoughts.
“How? How did he manage to subdue Marvin, of all people?!” Henrik yelled from the living room.
“I don’t know,” said Chase.
Jameson didn’t know either.
The next thing he knew, the four of them were standing in front of an abandoned warehouse on the outskirts of town. Jackie checked his phone. “This should be it. Okay, we’ll pair off. JJ, you and Schneep try and find Marvin while Chase and I distract Anti. Got it?”
Jameson nodded, slightly perturbed. He hadn’t seen Jackie this serious in months.
Jackie turned back to the building. “Alright, so first things first…” He paused, then his eyes widened. “Get down, now!”
It looked like a bomb had gone off. The windows were simultaneously blown out as fire poured out of them. Sparks filled the air. It might have just been shock, but Jameson though the embers floating around them looked like feathers.
The entire building was ablaze in a matter of seconds. All of them just gaped, frozen on the spot. Eventually, Chase snapped out of it and ran toward the entrance. “Marvin!”
Out of the door stumbled a figure. He walked a few steps, then swayed forward into Chase’s open arms. Chase slowly walked him over to where the rest of them were standing.
Marvin was a mess. His hair was haphazardly chopped into different lengths. Most of it was singed, and there were still a few small flames that Jameson patted out for him. His clothes were torn, and bruises were visible through the holes. There were a few nasty looking gashes on his chest. His tattoos were still glowing from overuse.
He smiled dazedly up at the group. “Sorry guys, I think I got the day wrong for the bonfire.”
Henrik made a noise that was halfway between a sob and a laugh. “You’re right, the bonfires were supposed to happen yesterday.”
“Ah well, never was very good with dates.” He leaned further into Chase’s shoulder. “Congrats, man. Where d’you wanna go for drinks.”
Chase’s grip on Marvin’s arm tightened. “Let’s focus on getting you better first, okay?” He motioned with his head for Jackie to support Marvin’s other side. “Jameson, go bring my truck around.” he whispered.
JJ nodded as Henrik rushed forward with his bag. The doctor leaned in, feeling around for breaks and assessing the cuts. Marvin slowly nodded along to what he was saying, clearly out of it.
The drive home was somber. Marvin started dozing as soon as the truck got moving, and the rest of them sat in silence.
Eventually, Chase spoke up. “Aw, don’t look so bummed Jackie. Maybe you’ll win next year.”
There was another stretch of silence, then all of them burst out laughing.
#writers of jack#writersofjack#jacksepticeye egos#septic egos#marvin the magnificent#jackieboy man#chase brody#henrik von schneeplestein#jameson jackson#fanfiction#my writing
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Kermit's Bizarre Adventure PART 3☆Wahdust Crusaders
#jojo memes#jojo meme#jojo#jojo fanart#jojoke#jojo's bizarre adventure#meme art#nintendo art#anime art#art#jojo shitpost#shitpost art#shitposting#shitpost#waluigi meme#church of waluigi#waluigi#kermit memes#kermit the frog#ness#earthbound meme#earthbound#gordon ramsay#gordon ramsay meme#obama#obama meme#jojo part 3#stardust crusaders#doge#shibe doge
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