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stormgardenscurse · 1 month

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at your service—!

Summary: Maid headcanons for May! When you’re invited into a rich family’s mansion to solve a murder mystery, who will you trust?

Warnings: mentions of death, assassins, poison and murder due to the theme.

Characters: Riddle, Deuce, Jade, Jamil, Rook, Epel, Lilia

If you liked this, consider checking out my TWST Isekai Fanbook, now digitally available on my kofi!

Riddle

The maid who you thought hated your guts at first, but it’s only because of how strict he is with both you and everyone else! You’re in the manor of the Queen of Hearts’ descendants after all, so Riddle will not allow you to fumble!

Honestly speaking, you felt like you could be scolded at any moment around Riddle. He teaches you dining etiquette, how to address certain people, how to dance…

...And saves your life, after your investigation ends up with you being chased by a masked assassin. Riddle surprises you with his abilities in horse riding and after a dramatic escape (stealing a horse from a previously wrecked carriage) addresses you informally for the first time (without realising it himself.)

After that, you start to take walks with Riddle in the rose gardens and listen to his explanations of the manor's history. It helps a lot in understanding background politics, and the sound of his voice is actually really soothing.

Could you say that you’re friends? You certainly trust him now, but can you be sure his would loyalties will lie with you and not his superior, if your investigation starts to point fingers in an unexpected direction?

Deuce

Deuce is well-meaning, but you’re warned by the other maids that he has a track record with delinquency. Cleaned up by the head butler when he entered the Rose Manor to work, but rumors are hard bugs to squash.

And when you spot him speaking to some well-known thugs in town, well… You’re stuck between a rock and a hard place. Deuce has only been welcoming and earnest with you, and now you’re wondering if he might have some ties to murderer.

Some kind of friend you are, huh? But at the end of the day, you’re an outsider who’s been hired precisely because your employer doesn’t know who they could trust.

Your apprehensions have no time to take shape however, because one morning you notice that Deuce is wearing makeup to hide bruises on his knuckles and arms, and you’re overcome by the instinct to help him treat his injuries before suspecting him of anything else.

There’s no way he would hurt someone on purpose, right?

Jade

Prim and proper, Jade is someone who’s often by your side when you’re in need of assistance (as instructed by your employer), yet remains as one of the only people you cannot get a read on.

Just what is he thinking whenever he watches you scribble in your notebook, crossing out theories and names? Does he have something to add? Or might he actually be in cahoots with the murderer, keeping you away from the truth with his convenient position by your side?

As it seems with most things, it takes a serious incident to make the both of you open up. Jade rescues you from a poisoning attempt, but you don’t wake up in your usual room. Instead you’re in one of the empty studies, so that nosy witnesses during the dinner party can’t disturb your rest.

You don’t make sense, Jade tells you. But based on the way he’s calmly giving you another dose of medicine, he finds it fun rather than stressful. You’re glad. And now you know a tiny bit more about him.

He starts off the conversation by telling you he has a twin that works in a neighboring manor. But despite all the trouble Floyd gets into, Jade hasn’t felt as hopeless about a person than when you fainted last night.

Even with how weak you are in comparison to knights or trained assassins, you still fling yourself into mystery with a headstrong manner that makes his mouth quirk up in a smile.

Jamil

Shortly after that, you allow yourself to rely on Jamil for the investigation. He’s quite willing to help, and you can tell Jamil enjoys having something to puzzle out, demonstrating his own strengths and resourcefulness.

Early on, you realize Jamil is one of the only normal people here. In this noble household with its foreign etiquette and social expectations, you’re relieved that Jamil doesn’t expect such things from you, and even offers a space for something familiar to exist.

He brings you lunch once during your investigation of the gardens. And instead of sitting somewhere too exposed, Jamil leads you to a hidden corner with pleasant shading and a safe enclosure of hedges. It’s nice, and you speak casually to one-another. You discuss the town and best shops for food. You feel human again, rather than just ‘the detective’.

…But the more you notice these traits, the more aware you become that Jamil could easily be related to the murderer. The spark of someone forced to lie low in the shadows despite their brilliance can lead to drastic incidents.

But still, you want to believe in the Jamil who brought you out for a picnic because he noticed you’ve been feeling suffocated. You want to believe this friendship isn't a hoax.

Rook

Despite how you were intimidated by his extrovertedness at first, Rook has proven to be a genuinely friendly person and willing to help during your stay here. Which is more than you can say for the rest of the manor—which was nice and respectful, but see your job as a taboo. A ‘what if we get involved and become the next targets,’ type of thing.

You can’t blame them, but it makes you naturally get closer to Rook over the course of your job. You realize one day that despite how much you’ve told him, you barely know anything about Rook.

He’s quite mysterious, as one who sweeps the floors while whistling a tune, always with a smile on his lips as he tells you about how beautiful the building and gardens are. His physique is a bit too toned for someone who only does housework. You suspect he has some other role in the manor too, and wonder if it might be related to the mystery's culprit.

It doesn’t help that Rook seems very knowledgeable about hunting. He helps you figure out where the victim must’ve run and how long it took for the murderer to catch up with them. And sometimes, when you’re caught up in your thoughts and theorizing, Rook surprises you with his soundless steps.

Epel

Epel has always done his best to assist you, despite how he’s only worked here for a year compared to the other maids. He seems to be trustworthy and willing to help, on top of proving he’s reliable.

You find out that before you came along, there were already groups of maids and other staff who tried to piece together the mystery themselves. But in doing so, created distrust between them and rivalries of suspicion. He thinks that the culprit is definitely a staff member, but can’t be sure of who.

You don’t think he’s directly related to the murderer, but there are times when Epel’s mouth purses during a conversation you’re having with another noble, and you feel like he isn’t telling you everything he knows. Maybe out of privacy or because it’s personal—but when both of you seem to be the targets of an attack, you can’t ignore it any longer and are forced to interrogate Epel.

Now that he’s been helping you with investigations however, there’s definitely a target of sorts on Epel’s back. A few of the maids are unhappy that he might be spreading false ideas to you in favor of one theory or another. And he’s too prideful to shrink under their demands, so they haven’t been on talking terms for a while.

You can only hope that he isn’t indeed a poisoned apple placed before you, unknowingly used by the murderer themself.

Lilia

Very knowledgeable about the hidden rooms around the manor, you can’t help but be a little wary about the clever glint in Lilia’s eyes. He’s explicitly been assigned to keep an eye on you for the sake of the manor’s secrets, and you can tell he isn’t trained to be a maid, despite how it's the pretense he’s using to stick to your side 24/7.

You sometimes get distracted by the mystery of who Lilia himself might be. He speaks about knights familiarly, yet none of the ones at the manor seem to recognise him when you both pass by. He’s not very good at chores or cooking (to the point where you took over at some points out of concern for the upholstery and kitchen), so how is he still blending in with the other maids?!

Lilia’s saved your life twice now, and you slowly learn that he has weapons hidden beneath his maid dress. Also that he can scale rooftops and the town in less than a minute, but you don’t want to ponder on his scary amount of agility just yet.

Thankfully however, it seems that Lilia is only hired here on a contractual basis. His true, deep rooted loyalties aren’t close to this manor. Which means when the both of you find some very incriminating evidence, Lilia helps keep it a secret from your employer. The both of you are shouldering the weight of the mystery now, but Lilia promises he’ll keep you safe.

You hope there never comes a time where you have to worry about his safety, or that he’d stick his neck out for you more than he needs to.

#riddle rosehearts x reader #deuce spade x reader #jade leech x reader #jamil viper x reader #rook hunt x reader #epel felmier x reader #lilia vanrouge x reader #twst x reader #twst x you #twst reader insert #twst headcanons #twst imagines #twisted wonderland #storm writings

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emojellyace08 · 8 months

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Hello! How've you been? Can you please write jealousy headcanons for lookism men with a female reader? The reader and they are not in a relationship but they have a crush on her and they get jealous when she hangs out with her guys best friend? Thank you ❤️

♡♡♡♡ Jealousy "Hey, would you please focus on me?" (Lookism Men x Female Reader)♡♡♡♡

A/N: Sorry for the really late reply @serenesoulseeker but I've been feeling a lot better lately! (been trying to recover from a cold rn) And sorry for the inconvenience bc I have other requests to do and other important tasks (this has been sitting on my drafts for a while -_-''''') but I hope my writing reaches your expectations. Ty! Genre: angst to fluff Warnings: jealousy and neediness (a bit of possessiveness), not in an established relationship with the character of choice at first, (yandere on Samuel, Olly, and Jiho's part), slight mentions of assault (night club), mentions of physical fighting, shouting, toxic relationship on the last part (NOT CONDONING THIS IN REAL LIFE) reader is gender neutral!

Daniel Park/Jay Hong/Zack Lee/Vasco (Lee Eun Tae)/Jace Park/Duke Pyeon/Eli Jang/Johan Seong/Jake Kim/Lineman/Brad Lee/Jerry Kwon/Jason Yoon/Jiho Park/Young Jinyeong Park/Yuseong

Getting to know him for a very long time is a ride. You've been childhood friends with him and he's one of the people you cherish a lot. You always got each other's back. You often scare those little bullies away when they're taking their insults personally again just to make him insecure. And at times you got to scold him while patching up his bruises when he gets beaten up by those thugs, he just really wants to protect you from those types of people.

He may get wounded because of his hero complex getting in the way at times, but it's just him being him. You may come out as strong and bold at times but he knows you got that soft spot in you once he gets to know you better. You're both glad that you get to know each other. In times in rich and wealth, in sickness and in health, in both of your ups and downs you're always partners in crime. Spending his extra time with you shows that he really values you as you're with him. Despite having your own business and focusing on both of your perspective goals, that spark just never faded away. You're both thankful that your friendship stays the same, even getting better even when you're not with him at most times.

Your relationship with him even developed the more you stayed beside him especially when he's down like there's a dark cloud above his head. You don't have to be there for him always, yet you chose to. That triggered something he never felt anything before. Something warm and exciting. He usually never engage in romance since he's afraid of getting rejected and hurt. But he felt so much in ease and comfortable with you. When you tease him he usually doesn't mind it since he knows that you don't mean it and you actually see the good in him. It took a while for him to realize that he's been crossing the line that he's not prepared for.

He's enlightened, nervous, and anything between scared and happy. If he confesses to you, will like him back just because of his looks? Or will you turn down his offer or live both of your best lives as lovers? Will you avoid him? He's not sure. Though he will respect your wishes if you want boundaries. But he can't help but to feel jealous when you mingle with other people, especially with other boys. He knows that your kind and uplifting spirit makes the other guys ask for help when they need to so he doesn't really have a problem with you spending time with them as long as they don't do anything scandalous to you. He knows that he's not your boyfriend and vice versa, so there's no need to feel jealous. Right? But he can't really control it at times. He wants to pin you on the wooden table as he wants to tell you his feelings, "Hey, would you please focus on me?" but he can't seem to tell it on your face. He doesn't mean to pout when you won't pay attention to him. But he gets really hot and sweaty when you lean closer to him when you're helping him out with his homework! Or he can't help but to admire your cute face that you make when he teases you.

He's really insecure about what he's feeling and about himself. But after collecting his courage, he decided to talk to you and face that wall that he's been trying to overcome. He doesn't care if you even reject him anymore. He's trying to act tough and strong so that he can keep up with his image and to your standards. But I guess it's now or never.

You are chatting with him as you view the beautiful scenery of the sun falling down as the moon starts to appear on the pinkish-blue hue of the sky. The wind's blowing is soft and gentle as leaves softly rustle and danced on the atmosphere falling off on the tall and strong trees. Birds are flying on the sky as children flew their kites and sweet couples enjoy their quality time with picnics or sitting on the bench, just chatting and laughing at pretty dumb stuff. Despite the background sounds getting a bit loud, he really enjoys this moment with you.

"Hey Y/N," "Hm? "I want to ask you a question." his voice became stern as you gave him your attention. "Yeah, what about that?" you can see him getting a bit sweaty as he gulped, not trying to be so harsh or obvious. "Ehem, do you have s-someone you like?" he asked as your eyes widened in surprise. "Oh about that," "Yeah?" "I-I have someone I really like." You replied feeling your own cheeks grew hot as his mouth curls into a frown. He shouldn't have been hoping for you reciprocating his feelings. But he can't help but to get curious about this type of yours. "Okay, what is he like?" he asked with a hint of discourage on his voice, his eyelashes fluttering as he tries to stop his tears from falling down on his soft face. He never meant to be overdramatic, but his jealousy along with his insecurities and personal problems consume him at times. "Well, he doesn't realize it but he's really handsome, nice, talented, smart in his own ways. But that's not the reason I started developing feelings for him. He's so soft and gentle at me all the time, even being patient when I'm acting like a drama queen/king. But he's been so understanding at my problems even when I'm at fault at times. He doesn't give up on me and he actually made me a better person in some ways." you replied honestly as both of you avoided eye contact. "And I don't mean to offend anybody but," "Huh?" you faced him as you leaned a bit closer to him as he panics. It doesn't mean that he hates it, it's in fact the opposite. He can't help but to stare at your pretty face, but as the guy/someone who developed feelings first, he should be making the first move! "What if I told you that it's you that I like?" "E-EH!"

Now after talking it through out you're going to be a lovey dovey couple. If you're the shy type you're going to be a blushing idiot around him and vice versa. Though after confessing to each other he wants to take things slowly and surely so both of you wouldn't hurt each other's feelings and waste your friendship, memories, and time at the end. He fully respects it if you want to focus on your studies, family, and with your future career but just remember that he's always here for you all the time even if you're lovers or not :) (but trust me he's going to be one of the most loving boyfriends in this verse so it's now or never ;)

Warren Chae/Zack Lee/James Lee/Goo Kim/Sinu Han/Jake Kim/Vin Jin/Young Elite & Tom Lee/Kuroda Ryuhei/Olly Wang/Yoojin/Gongseob Ji/Kwak Jihan &Jibeom

This f*cker is insane. If you met him on your middle school, high school or in your workplace one thing you know is that he's going to piss you off (in a really good and bad way). He doesn't usually engage with his love life, he might have flings and flirts there and then but he's not really emotionally ready for mature understandings in a couple relationship. And besides he doesn't really want to either, he has other plans, goals, and other businesses to handle before getting into a committed relationship. Having a crush is fine he guesses.

But meeting you for the first time is something that feels different yet familiar. Two things crossed on his mind. First, why the f*ck does he need a partner for his work/school activity? And second is that even if he didn't want to admit it but something about you looks interesting. You look like someone who's pretty chill, and even if you won't shut the hell up he has another bicker friend to make and chat with. So it's a 50/50 win.

But one thing he sure know he's wrong about. You're more than your skills, beauty, brains, and talents. Even if you're the introverted or extroverted type, one thing he knows is that you're actually helpful and reasonable. What he likes about you is that you're pretty realistic in some situations that most people can't handle with. And you might sound harsh at times but it's just you being honest and giving constructive criticisms. It might not be obvious that he likes you because of him making you loose your temper and patience at times, but it's just him being him (an annoying little brat). But whenever things get serious, you always got his back and vice versa. You and him are one hell of a disaster if someone or even many people tries to mess with your shit.

Even if he seems to act bold, cold, intimidating and monstrous, he's actually a bit of a scared cat when you bring up the topic of him getting a girlfriend/boyfriend. His body just tenses when you talk about someone who looks physically attractive to you or when they show you acts of good and kind-hearted services. At first he conflicts to his subconscious that it's just him acting like an older brother to you as he scowls and hisses at them like a possessive cat. He can't help but to raise his eyebrows and roll his dark looking orbs when you giggle about your previous crushes, even cringing and boasting that he's a better man than that wimp will ever be. "HAH?! HIM?! REALLY?! Jesus Christ Y/N I didn't know that you have a really bad taste at picking men." he smirks as he bites on his strawberry-flavored lollipop while laughing at your grumpy looking form with him obviously being taller and muscular than you. "You don't even know him! He's not only kind but he's also helpful and bonus points, HOT!" he chokes on his sweet while he lets now a loud guffaw that can be probably heard at the whole building. This bastard really knows to piss you off. But it's just him being jealous. He thinks to himself that he may not be the best in showing affection and even coming out as arrogant at times, but he'll definitely change his misdeeds and wrong doings just to be a good influence on you. He might flirt there and then just to see you getting flustered while smacking his arms to stop. But he wouldn't go too far to make you feel uncomfortable around him. Respect.

Whoever tries to touch you without your permission gets smashed on the face by him. He may not be your boyfriend but whoever pervert who takes it too far and doesn't know boundaries deserves to feel his stinging and even gut-wrenching attacks.

It was on a late evening when you wear your clothing of choice to hang out on your own on a night club. You messaged him that you're going out on your own to get a few drinks with him answering that it's best if he can accompany you if you don't mind. But you reassured him that you'll be okay and you'll come home safe and sound. How wrong are you on that part. A skinny looking dude kept approaching you for your number while you politely decline that you're fine with your own. But he couldn't just stop bothering you, the fight have even turned into physical if you asked me. He was about to slap you on the face but then your friend stopped his attack by putting pressure on his wrist making the drunk bastard groan and grit his teeth. "Oi you dumb fuck, is that how you treat a person?" "Why the fuck are you getting out of the wa-" Your eyes widened as he landed an attack on the poor guy, but he just deserved it since he's not being responsible.

Both of you have to get out of that place filled with stench of smoke and alcohol. You're not really on the right mind either as the *alcohol/drink of choice* is starting to kick in your system. You crying and wailing on his arms like a little toddler when your toy is taken away from you. "WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU FOLLOW ME HERE?! I ASKED FOR MY OWN TIME! I COULD HAVE PROTECTED MY SELF THERE!" you sobbed as you keep hitting him on the arms as he tries to make you calm down. "OI YOU REALLY THINK THAT I CAN JUST LEAVE YOU ALONE THERE?! WHAT IF YOU GOT HURT OR WHAT IF SOMETHING ELSE HAPPENED TO YOU?!" he was about to scold you more before you hit him again despite not being hurtful at all before you puked on his new bought shirt, ah what a dumbass you are at times. "SCREW YOU! YOU ALWAYS GET IN MY WAY! EVEN TEASING ME WHEN MY FEELINGS ARE ALREADY GETTING HURT! YOU DON'T EVEN CARE WE ARE JUST CO-WORKERS/CLASSMATES!"

He'll make sure to give you every detail about what happened that night and he'll apologize on his shortcomings, even being honest about his mistakes which you can feel a bit uncanny since it's not like him. "Sorry Y/N for being an asshole at times. Sorry if I offended you. I may not be sounding sincere right now but I'll try my best to make it up to you. We're partners in crime after all". Nonetheless, if you and him can make it work out and talk about your problems with each other you and him will make a great couple :).

Gun Park/Kwak Jichang/Taesoo Ma/DG (Kang Dag Yeom)/Young Charles Choi (Elite)/Daniel Park (post-training with Gun arc)/Johan Seong/Cheon Taejin/Magami Kenta

He's another one who doesn't really focus on his love life. He does feel that being alone can be lonely at times but one main advantage of being single is that he can have quality time for himself and he can keep an eye on his goals. But he can definitely feel a spark between the two of you the more he gets to know you better if he really likes you. He's just him chilling in his own world I guess.

He doesn't really get jealous? At all? He might have some moments of feeling disappointed when you're busy with your schooling/work or when you turn your attention to your classmate/co-worker but he just wouldn't speak about it unless if you're doing it intentionally he still definitely gets jealous.

He can simply control his emotions in times especially when both of you are out for business. He maintains his professionalism intact with him since acting like a crybaby about it would just make a ruckus between the two of you and he doesn't want an argument in the first place. He wants to keep each others' boundaries, love, connection, and self respect for one another so he'll just ask about your day while he listens to your rumbles in your school/workplace as long as you listen to him as well ;3.

He's also very honest about his feelings and what upsets him the most. He wouldn't be afraid to voice out his concerns most of the times. At times he's feeling very hesitant to talk about his or your issues since he's already mentally exhausted and he doesn't want to bruise your heart. But he knows that running away from something won't make anything better. So as much as it hurts your part, he's willing to give some constructive criticisms even if you're the sensitive type and he'll also listen to your point of view in situations while he also explains his side of things (he doesn't emotionally abuse you don't worry).

And your friend might feel a little glare or you might see a little pout on his face when you don't give him attention. He really wants to get showered with love and care even though his inferior is tough and strong. But he's still a human, feeling emotions like jealousy so expect for him to gently grab your chin while he looks at you with that demanding and fierce, yet soft and sparkly eyes to lock on you especially when both of you are alone keeping each others' company. "Hey, did you take notes to what I am talking about?" "E-Eh?!" "Keep your focus on me even just for today, I'm not emotionally free when I'm out for work. So listen to me right now."

But his demeanor will completely change once a fucker who knows that you're in a relationship with him tries to flirt with you. It's not even a feeling of jealousy at this point. He's going to feel rage once someone tries to touch you inappropriately. It's going to be a massacre if you don't convince him to stop since he doesn't have a beating for a while now. Your one of the people whom he only listens to so as much as he wants to teach that guy a lesson he'll consider sparing them, he might not want to see their face though after he tries flirting and taking advantage of you.

Samuel Seo/Olly Wang/Jiho Park (villain arc)/Vin Jin (at start of Lookism when he's still super toxic unlike today he's still an asshole at times)

Oh girl/boy, do I even need to start? -_-'''' 🚩🚩🚩.

Literally the definition of "pure" red flag inside out.

This guy has daddy issues, family issues, mommy issues, inferiority complex issues, literally any issue. He also (probably) has abandonment issues so he pretty much won't let you go if he feels like you're the "one for him".

Pretty creepy with the face that he makes when he gets excited for beating someone when somebody tries to get closer to you (especially his rival). He might take this as a big challenge to see which one deserves to be with you.

A literal gangster inside out. Y'all saying that you can fix him, are you Bob the Builder or smth? Like there's a literal whole construction site dedicated for him 😭.

He MIGHT change his values and goals once you taught him how to love and appreciate his self for the way he is but so far it's probably going to be a toxic relationship if you're also a really hard headed person.

He easily gets jealous out of the bunch even at the smallest things. No matter how many times you try to convince him that you're not flirting with your schoolmate/co-worker, once he lost his cool he'll be literally scary and monstrous. Literal shouting, screaming and crying will be heard on your room while he throws things on the wall when he loose his temper at you. *Sigh* Idk about it.

Definition of insecure (I don't know if I'm describing or insulting them at this point).

A literal ass most at times. Yikes.

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sammysficfactory · 1 year

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JJK men’s reaction to you calling them a whore/slut

characters: nanami, gojo, geto, and toji

notes: if you want me to go more in depth for a character lmk!

Nanami Kento

oh em gee

he is SHOCKED

have you no shame? no decorum?

“You look like a whore when you wear your suit without a blazer.” you deadpanned.

“Excuse me?” Nanami is thoroughly confused, hoping he didn’t hear you correctly. But he did. And who could blame you?

“You heard what I said.” You shrug.

he would never admit it, but he liked it

the way you said it so outright threw him for a LOOP honey

if he were a rich woman he’d be clutching his pearls

“Don’t say it like that. Just say you think it’s nice and move on like normal people do.” Nanami rolls his eyes at you. If you looked close enough you could see a light pink dusting the tips of his ears.

you laugh at him for being flustered

but you’re a good person so you suppress it a little bit

as you call him a whore more often he gets used to it

don’t get me wrong, it still flusters the hell out of him

but he’s accepted it as part of your relationship dynamic

Satoru Gojo

i can’t even lie to you

gojo would like it

“You look like a slut in that outfit.” You say in a nonchalant fashion. Gojo smirks.

“Do I look like a slut? Or do you see something you like.” he leans forward to you, the proximity of your faces distressingly close.

if you thought his ego was big then

i can promise you it’s 10x bigger now

“You want me so bad.” Gojo laughs smugly. You scoff.

“You wish.”

the truth is you DID want him

he was in that black tee and wearing sweats😩

I CANT BLAME YOU

despite the two of you being in a relationship gojo loved to tease you like you were still single

gojo probably bites his finger every time he thinks about the first time you called him a slut

every few weeks he texts you ‘remember that time you wanted me so bad that you said i looked like a slut? i do🤭’

he be swinging his feet back and forth as he types it out

Geto Suguru

if he’s nothing else, he’s definitely gojo’s friend

he’s a good sport about it

“You look like a whore when your hair is in a bun.” Geto does a double take.

“I- what?” He’s confused. One moment you were sitting in a peaceful silence with your boyfriend, and the next you’re calling him a slut?

very confused about the train of thought you took to get to that conclusion

but after a few times he gets used to it

and his replies are definitely something

“You look like a slut in those glasses.” you say flatly. Geto sighs,

“Come slut me out then.” he says, leaning back and spreading his legs slightly on the couch.

when you hear him say it for the first time you almost caught whiplash

you for the first time in the entirety of your relationship, were at a loss for words

it was BAD

you opened and closed your mouth like a goldfish bc you couldn’t find anything to say

you in fact do slut him out once you gather yourself

he’s smug asf for the next week

Toji Fushiguro

he’s shocked too

but his reaction was a lot different

“Toji, you look really slutty in that outfit.” You eye him up and down.

“Bitch?” he quickly apologizes for his knee-jerk reaction.

“Watch that bitch word, Toji! Deadass.” You narrow your eyes at him. He already knew how you felt about that word.

he saw his life flash before his eyes when he said ‘bitch’

he’s super smug too

he isn’t as bad as gojo or geto though

it becomes a running inside joke between the two of you

toji would do shit like send photos of his outfit and say ‘feeling extra slutty today’

and it might make you chuckle a little when he sends them

“You’re not going to the market with me looking like a whore Toji, go change.” you joked.

“Wow, are you slut shaming me right now? I thought you were a feminist.” He accuses you in fake shock.

“I’m getting women’s lick back.” you justify yourself.

does it sound kinda weird to other people? yes

but did you care is the real question

the answer is no

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ferris-the-wheel · 8 months

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TWST relationship headcanons!!

Info: Six months after you start dating the respective character.

Author's note: The characters were chosen by a friend at random (with no context). I'm also still on Chapter 6 of the main storyline and don't know much about the main Diasomnia characters' pasts, so these hcs will take place before then, I guess?

TW: Maybe a tiny bit of angst(?)

When you two first started dating, he was so happy that he couldn't sleep. He was actually surprised to find that he hadn't randomly fallen asleep during the day as he normally did.

After that, he'd spend a lot of time around you, concluding that it was because of you that he didn't fall asleep.

Since he's basically the adopted brother of Malleus, he undoubtedly has at least some money. He likes to buy you surprise gifts so that he can see you smile. which makes him happier as well.

He invites you over to Diasomnia a lot (encouraged by Lilia), which he's perfectly fine with as, as stated earlier, he likes spending time with you.

His favorite pastime is sitting somewhere where you two can see the stars at night like a balcony or somewhere where there are a lot of windows (though he prefers being outside).

He's such a good boyfriend, I mean, he was raised and trained as a knight. If someone is giving you trouble, expect Silver to give them a very stern talking to (with or without Malleus beside him as incentive).

He's a very calm and comforting presence, making you feel better if you're feeling down and cheering you up.

I don't think he'd mind PDA, but I feel like he'd be a bit more reserved with it, so he'd settle for holding hands while you're walking or stuff like that.

He's very pleased that you agreed to date him, but also very sad. He feels like a bad person because he knows that by dating you, you'll eventually grow old and die while he'll live on. He thinks he's depriving you of a "normal life" with another human.

You've worked very hard to convince him that he's the one you want to be with and that you don't want anyone else.

He spoils you A LOT. He'll splurge a shit ton of money on fancy dates, gifts, and other things. He spoils you to the point where you have almost no empty floor space in your room, so you had to ask him to stop spending so much on you (though you felt bad about this because of the expression on his face).

Aside from that, he's extremely loyal to you. Despite your reassurances, he thinks that at least if he's going to deprive you of a mortal love, then he's going to pride himself in being the most loyal boyfriend (hopefully husband later) ever.

He's very happy that Lilia approves of you and that you two get along. He enjoys walking in on you two hanging out and genuinely appreciating each others' company. He's also very grateful that you help prevent kitchen disasters by monitoring babysitting Lilia while he's "cooking".

I don't really think he'd exactly know what PDA is or what qualifies as PDA, so he'd just walk up to you and either a) act as normal or b) be a bit affectionate such as a kiss (on the lips or cheek, he doesn't care) or he'd wrap his arm around you. If you aren't a fan though, he'd refrain from doing so.

His personality made it very hard for you to trust him in the beginning, as he's very sly, but you eventually learned to trust him more. He'd be happy if you were rich but he'd empathize if you weren't. He doesn't care if you have a lot of money a lot, as he definitely isn't rich either.

If you give him something (especially food), he'll be extremely happy. He'll be even happier if you give him enough to feed his community back home. Give him some donuts and he'll be in heaven, literally wondering what a crook like him did to deserve someone like you (just for giving him donuts).

He may feel bad dating you since you can give him things like food and other presents while he can't really afford to buy things for you or take you anywhere. He does extra tasks for Leona in exchange for money, but you wouldn't let him spend it on you and told him to save it or give it to the people back home.

Therefore, he shows his love by hugs, stealing quick kisses on your cheek, goofing around, and snuggling (if one of you is in the mood). He'll randomly grab your hand while you're walking or carry things for you in the hallways, little things like that.

I think he'd be impartial toward PDA, he'd base it off of your preferences. If you aren't a fan of PDA, he'd dial it down to when it's just the two of you. If you like PDA or don't mind it, he'd be doing the things above (cheek kisses, hand grabbing, hugs, etc.).

How you managed to even talk to this dude in person, that's a mystery. You probably met on the internet and wound up meeting that way. But now that you're in his life, good luck trying to get out. He isn't used to people showing any form of affection toward him (or human interaction in general), so once you become what he considers a friend, he's not letting you go easily.

Once you start dating? Oh yeah, you are never getting rid of him. Not to say he's clingy (that's a lie, he's a bit clingy), but he'd be texting you constantly wanting to know if you want to game or Netflix and chill.

He's not exactly a romantic but you don't mind (or hopefully you don't if you're dating Idia). He isn't a big fan of physical touch, so quality time is likely the way to go. I hc that he's a very snuggly person despite this, when he's in the mood. I think he's a little spoon (he's too awkward to be big spoon).

He's like, the most loyal guy ever (I mean, he never goes anywhere and doesn't talk to almost anyone). You would never have to worry about unfaithfulness with this guy, he's wayyyyy too attached to you now that you've infiltrated his little gamer den (and his heart).

PDA? Banish the thought from your mind. This is Idia, he doesn't leave his room unless absolutely necessary. If you wanted any PDA from him, you'd have to fight all the phantoms in Tartarus/the Underworld (and maybe not even then) for him to want to do anything like PDA. If PDA is a must on your list, Idia is not your guy.

Hiii! How you guys doing? I hope you enjoyed this post. I'll post part 2 innn..... three? four days? Hope you don't mind. You can send whatever requests you want (as long as they follow my rules)! Bye~~!!! 🧡

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londonspirit · 7 months

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Our Flag Means Death’s season-two finale has it all. There’s a declaration of true love between our favorite criminals, Stede Bonnet (Rhys Darby) and Ed, a.k.a. Blackbeard (Taika Waititi). There’s also a heartbreaking death (RIP, Con O’Neill’s Izzy Hands), a pirate wedding that ends with the words “You are now officially mateys,” and some big-time fight scenes. “Mermen” packs a tight punch in only 30 minutes. The episode is both thrilling and satisfying, so even if Max makes the grave mistake of not renewing the series, fans will feel closure in a way that they didn’t with season one’s sendoff. And Our Flag Means Death creator David Jenkins already has some fun ideas brewing for a third season (and beyond!). The A.V. Club spoke to Jenkins about his plans to evolve Ed and Stede’s relationship, potential spin-offs, and how everyone on the show is handling its passionate fanbase.

The A.V. Club: First of all, how dare you kill Izzy Hands? Was that always the plan when you mapped out season two?

David Jenkins: [Laughs] Yes. I felt that Izzy had reached a point where he broke through a lot of his major patterns. It was fun to give him a season where he got to do everything and where Con O’Neill got to do everything. Well, I won’t say everything, because Con can do light years beyond what I think he can do, and I do think he can do anything. We wanted to show the depth of that character. Izzy is one of my favorites. He’s like middle management who is in a sort of love triangle [in season one]. He got his wish at the end of the first season by breaking up his boss and his boss’ lover. He got punished as a result, and he had to come out on the other side, which felt like a good journey.

AVC: Despite everything that happens in season two, including Izzy’s death, the finale ends on a happy note with Ed and Stede living together. Why was it important for you to show that?

DJ: Season one ends on such a tough note for them. As you said, after what they’ve been through, they should get a moment of happiness. I won’t say however fleeting. They are going to have challenges ahead. They’re both not the most mature yet. I think that’s the fun of it, to leave them in a place where it’s a good kind of stasis. They’ve sent the kids off in the car, so to speak, and now they’re going to have to really grow if they’re going to start an inn. It won’t be easy, but I like that they’re going to try.

AVC: “Mermen” has all the elements necessary for a season finale. Did you partly add all that as a way to provide closure in case this is the end for OFMD?

JD: What’s important to understand is that you never even know if you’re going to get a second season. Maybe if you get picked up for two right away, and even then, but especially right now, who knows? I think with season one’s end, it was a gamble to leave it the way it was. Everybody stomached through it. Now if it turned out they didn’t want us to make more, I just didn’t want to have another story where the same-sex love story ends in tragedy, unrequited love, or if one or both of them are being punished.

AVC: I actually love that about Our Flag Means Death. It reminds me of Schitt’s Creek in a way because the love story just exists and is perfect; there’s no questioning it as right or wrong.

JD: That’s such a nice compliment because I also think Schitt’s Creekdoes that really well.

AVC: You’ve previously said you want Our Flag to have only three seasons. Is that still true or do you feel like the show has scope to continue beyond that?

JD: I feel like Stede and Blackbeard’s story is a three-season story, but the world of the show could go beyond that. It’s a really rich world with so many stories to tell and really good performers to tell it. I do want to see how Ed and Stede become a mature couple in the next season. They’re a couple who is like in their late twenties right now as opposed to being teens at the end of season one.

AVC: So if OFMD continues in some other form, are there characters you’d like to focus more on or other historical references you’d like to include?

JD: Yeah, a lot, because it’s such a rich ensemble. How do you not want to see more of Joel Fry, Samson Kayo, Ewen Bremner, Nathan Foad, or Vico Ortiz? Any one of them could carry their own show. It’s fun to think about that and the storylines we can do with them, mixing and matching all our characters. Vico is incredible, for example, and I especially love watching them in an action sequence. This is a weird comparison, but there’s a Harrison Ford and Sigourney Weaver vibe they put out. I’m such a fan of what they do.

AVC: You also really like parallels and coming full circle as a storyteller.

JD: Yeah, I do.I knew I wanted to start season two in the Republic of Pirates and end by coming back there. Stede goes on an amazing journey between the episodes. He’s thrown out of there initially, but then he comes back as a hero. I like the symmetry of that. And then the Republic of Pirates gets destroyed; it dies. It’s not just Izzy; it’s the place too. It was important to have a home, this stronghold for everyone, be destroyed. But the characters are not crushed. They’re going to try to move on.

AVC: One of season two’s new characters is Zheng Yi Sao, played by Ruibo Qian, who quickly becomes an integral part of the crew. What was the casting process like for her?

JD: Ruibo is an amazing find. One of our incredible casting directors, Cindy Tolan, she had Ruibo in mind immediately for that part by the time it got to her. And we had looked and looked before talking to Cindy. Ruibo has her own fascinating story because apparently, she had a couple of strong premonitions that she’s going to play Zheng Yi Sao. She had a modern take on the part without it being strained. She’s incredible. She’s a trained theater actor with a lot of chops. She has to go toe-to-toe with Taika and Rhys. She did it with such grace.

AVC: Season two takes Blackbeard on an interesting turn of denouncing being a pirate. But in the finale, it’s almost like he’s reborn as one, especially with that gorgeous shot of him coming out of the water. What was the thought process behind this arc?

JD: Thank you. Blackbeard is a guy in recovery when he comes back to the ship when he’s wearing the jumpsuit. He’s trying to hang on and find some kind of footing. Who is he if he’s not a pirate? Meanwhile, Stede is on his way up and wants to experience the rockstar life of a pirate, while Ed as Blackbeard is over it. It was an interesting tension of, which one gives up their dream? A lot of times in relationships questions can come up, like who is going to give up on their dream to take care of the kids? Obviously, no one wants to, but someone ends up giving up more than they want to at some point. What’s wonderful about a mature romance, and what I’d want to see more of in season three, is Ed and Stede making these tough decisions.

AVC: Stede and Ed’s relationship has led to a passionate, vocal fandom, which you didn’t have as you were writing season one. While working on season two, how did you avoid doing fan service and focus on meaningful storytelling?

JD: I never anticipated the strong reaction to season one. It’s incredible it happened. Everybody is buoyed by it in the cast, crew, and the writers’ room. To be perceived on that level with such enthusiasm makes us want to make more of it. A lot of the things the fans love are not different from things the writers love. We are fans of the show. We’re writing fanfic, but it’s called fic when we write it. The big thing for us is to make sure we’re writing beats for the characters that feel true and have moments where all of us go, “Ooooh, we have to do this.” If the beats stay true, it won’t feel like we’re simply pandering.

AVC: How do you break down those beats for Ed and Stede’s relationship as they go from wanting to take it slow to sleeping with each other this season? And where do they go next?

JD: It’s challenging with them because most rom-coms end with couples getting together. They don’t then stay with them and say, “We’re together now, but it’s turbulent; how is that going to work out?” We thought, “Okay, let’s look at our relationships in the room. What have we encountered? Who’s been dumped? Who has had to forgive somebody?” These questions were fun for the second season. I think for the third, it would [be], “Okay, who’s had a relationship for over 10 years? What things do you have to work on?” It’s fun to watch two people like Ed and Stede go through this experience.

#our flag means death season 2 #ofmd s2 #ofmd s2 spoilers #spoiler #our flag means death #ofmd #david jenkins #interview #av club article

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runa-falls · 1 year

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cat and mouse - 1

Pairing: Miguel O'Hara x Supervillain(?)!Reader

Warnings: none -- oh you get thrown into a vat of radioactive liquid, but it doesn't hurt too bad.

a/n: when you think of another fic idea in the middle of writing your other WIP :D

Summary: Every time you try to convince people it was an accident, you immediately get ratted out to the Spider. But really, it was! You don't know why you're being hunted, you didn't even do anything wrong. Yet.

w/c: 716

part 2 part 3 part 4

masterlist

----

Here’s a riddle:

“What do you get when you push an unemployed woman into a vat of radioactive liquid?”

Apparently, an unemployed enemy of the state.

You were never the kind of girl who grew up ripping the heads off of your Barbies, or a woman who falls in love with a guy at the insane asylum. You just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.

As soon as your head ducked under the burning liquid, you thought you were dead. So you let go and stopped struggling. But really, is there anyone in history who hasn’t survived being pushed into a vat of something?

For example, there's Electro with the eels, and Sandman with the, uh, sand, so you really shouldn’t have been surprised when you woke up with more energy than you’ve ever felt before, though your back was killing you.

Opening your eyes, you noticed you were splayed over a sidewalk, clothes barely covering you as most of the fabric disintegrated in the power plant. Then you saw fire. Lots of fucking fire.

With a quick turn of your head, your eyes followed the trail of destruction all the way back to the exploded building where the accident happened. And before you knew it, you were in cuffs, being questioned by the police.

It’s easy to break out of jail, especially when you can burn right through the iron bars. And it’s easy to lose the cops too when you can scale buildings.

Despite your increased strength, agility, and sensitized hearing, there are several setbacks to being a random woman full of radioactive energy. Your hair, for one, is completely orange. Who knew radioactive juices acted like cheap boxed bleach?

You constantly have to re-dye it back to your original shade and use tons of hair oil to keep it from frizzing up but it only really lasts for a day or two. Talk about having awkward one-night stands…

Unfortunately, your hair is the most recognizable feature of yours so civilians started to call you “Blaze” like some sort of Fantastic Four character. You hate it.

You also can’t get a job because you’re the most wanted woman in Nueva York. So you resort to “borrowing” some money from rich people who definitely wouldn’t notice or care. And then you got caught.

“So it’s been you this whole time?” The low voice makes you jump. You weren’t expecting anyone to be home. “So you’re the one stealing hundreds of dollars from innocent civilians?” The Spider-man slowly walks out from the shadowed corner of the office, making the moment as dramatic as possible.

You quickly close whoever’s laptop you were trying to get into before holding your hands up in a dumb attempt to act innocent. He looks unimpressed by your ‘sneaky outfit’, eyes pouring over the black turtleneck and faded black jeans. Look, it’s not like you had a closet full of options.

You frown, “They’re hardly innocent.”

“Hm,” He slides the laptop toward himself, opening it up to see how far in you got. You didn’t. You were about to give up and leave before he interrupted you. “How so?”

You scoff without thinking about it, “You think a person can make billions of dollars without taking advantage of people?” Apparently, your words amuse him, and a small smirk quirks on his lips. The light of the computer reflects against his cherry red irises. He’s… pretty.

“All I know,” He shuts the laptop and finally looks up at you, dropping any hint of his previous smile. “Is that you blew up a power plant, escaped prison, and now live off of the money that you’re taking from others.”

“C’mon Spider-Man, it’s only a couple of bucks. I don’t have a job–”

“No kidding.” He shakes his head and takes a second to think about something before offering you a hand over the desk, almost like a peace offering. “Here’s my proposition: you come with me and we can get some dinner before getting you back to where you belong.” You quirk a brow upwards, suspicious of his change in tone. “Come on, it’s late. I’d rather avoid the fighting part.”

“Back to…where?”

“Prison, honey.”

That was the start of your cat-and-mouse relationship with the one and only, Spider-Man.

#miguel o’hara x reader #miguel o’hara #miguel o’hara x you #spider-man across the spider verse #cat and mouse

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likealittleheartbeat · 3 months

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hey! i really enjoy your analysis of aang and zuko's relationship, and i was just wondering if you have any thoughts on this:

when aang considers what he's afraid of the most, he doesn't just see zuko - he sees the blue spirit. why do you think his fear is linked to that mask? zuko was the most amicable towards him when he put that mask on, and was hostile every other time.

Ooooh!! This is such a rich and meaty question!! And it's something I've wondered about but never dove into before.

I guess there are a couple of questions we need to explore. One, do we want to begin to analyze this from Aang's perspective or the series' themes, which, when put together, should offer us the fullest idea of what the intent might be? If we begin with Aang's perspective, then the next question we need to next ask what is Aang's view of Zuko and/or the Blue Spirit at this point in the narrative? My worry about beginning at that intimate level is that we might miss possible connections that a thematic understanding might facilitate and may, like many fandom analyses, leave it at a character level when, in fact, the characters exist to serve larger philosophical purposes, especially in a show like ATLA.

So, we'll return to those questions about Aang after we visit some questions about the broader themes here. We know for a fact that the team did a lot of research into Eastern philosophies that they had to then pack down into 24 minute episodes, preserving a surprising amount of complexity not in the words but in the actions and visuals. The 2 part Crossroads of Destiny episode is probably the most evocative of this practice. The four-way fight scene is celebrated for the way it masterfully shows character development through fight choreography. Then, Aang's crystal chamber he forms to master the Avatar State is a direct reference to a statement about pre-enlightenment in one of the foundational texts about Japanese Zen for American Buddhists, "The Three Pillars of Zen." The rapid explanations of the seven chakras with Guru Pathik might seem like a a skimming of Tantric beliefs based on the brief statements and processing, but it's another prime example the way ATLA suffuses meaning beyond the script.

What more can be said about the Earth (also called the Root or Muladhara) Chakra, then, that the show might reflect without stating it explicitly. Guru Pathik explains that the Earth Chakra "deals with survival." Is there any subject more prescient than that for our protagonist, the single survivor of an otherwise all-encompassing genocide? Other accounts of this chakra that I can find explain that it's at this chakra that one can observe that their base needs are being met--enough food, enough water, etc. There seems to be a subtle witnessing to the effects of PTSD here then. With this chakra untouched, unopened, and out of balance, Aang within his mind has been living in a state of emergency without knowing it, believing himself at a core level beyond his consciousness to still be under immediate threat even in moments of peace like his meditations throughout the opening of his chakras. "Your vision is not real," Guru Pathik points out, not to say that no danger exists for him in the world but to illuminate the immediate reality surrounding his person.

The memories and visions that flash during the sequence hint at how fear conceals deeper realities and thus possibilities. I'll start with the clip of Katara sinking away from the first episode of Book 2, "The Avatar State." The Earth Kingdom General performed this cruelty after many other attempts to force Aang into suffering to gain the Avatar State. Believing he lost another person he loved, the state was triggered despite the actuality that Katara was unharmed. The fear of her loss overwhelmed Aang, and even her safe return could not assuage his traumatic response. The Blue Spirit incident forms a striking parallel to this event, in that case. Aang felt himself helpless and in danger only to discover the opposite: the seemingly malevolent force freed him from danger. Further, that Blue Spirit Mask concealed Zuko who, by the end of the series, will be revealed (to himself and) Aang as an ally and a friend. The shadowy image of Ozai, then, connected with these two fear-inducing semblances, can be seen then as perhaps the ultimate foreshadowing of Aang's ultimate success in pacifying Ozai. Put in the context of this chakra and the other two visions, it frames the Firelord as a facade meant to induce terror and distance, when in reality, life and humanity still lay behind the horrifying megalomania.

Concerning the Blue Spirit element specifically in the series, I want to explore one more factor within the series before getting back to Aang's character relationship in this moment. Blue has a running symbolic theme within the series that seems especially relevant here since it played a huge role in a highly symbolic part of the directly previous episode, "The Earth King." As Zuko rides out his psychogenic fever induced by releasing Aang's bison and abandoning his Blue Spirit mask, he is confronted in his dreams by a blue dragon voiced by Azula and a red dragon voiced by Iroh. I felt really confused by these two would-be shoulder angels for the longest time (literally until I was sorting my thoughts out to write this) because Azula's blue dragon is the one who entreats Zuko to rest, which even in Grey Delisle/Azula's clearly threatening tone--she even ends the temptation by saying "sleep just like mother!"--seemed to be what Zuko needed to do as opposed to the red dragon's exhortations to get out. I could see how sleeping might also refer to accepting his upbringing without thought, but why blue? The layers upon layers of possible meaning overwhelmed me.

I posit that blue in the series, especially when put in relationship to red/orange, as it is in the dream sequence, the dynamic between the water tribe and the fire nation, the fire of zuko and azula (especially the final agni kai), and the energy-bending of Aang over Ozai in the finale, ought to be read as Yin (making red/orange yang). Yin is passive, retractive, and receptive, which makes the invitation to rest by a blue dragon make perfect sense. Yin is also feminine in nature, hence the association with both Azula (whose blue fire and lightning becomes especially interesting to explore under this understanding) and Zuko's mother in the dualistic dragon dream. If you know anything about yin and yang, you know that it's key tenet is ever-changing coordination of yin and yang within one entity and with relationships between entities rather than the privileging of one above another. The two dragons in Zuko's dream, while seemingly in opposition to one another, are actually seeking, like the bumper stickers say, "coexistence" of their dispositions.

Now, back to Aang's vision of fear over the Blue Spirit. The red that overlays everything is specifically a reference to the Earth Chakra, which is symbolized by the color red. But the fact that he has one fear of Katara, the pinnacle of blueness/yin in the series, dying, and another fear of the Blue Spirit, a de-flamed (read: emasculated) Zuko attacking him that are then overlayed by this Earth Chakra red, a color otherwise used to portray yang (masculinity, activeness, expansion, and repulsion) and the fire nation in the series, suggests that his fears are specifically about within holding onto yin nature (symbolized by his grasping for a disappearing Katara) without being entirely overwhelmed by it (in the image of the fear he felt as the Blue Spirit approached his imprisoned body). And all those fears are intensified when living in such a patriarchal, or yang-skewed age and society, which gets depicted through both the final image of Ozai, the ultimate patriarch within this world, and the red coloring.

I promised I would get back to the characters, and after that hopefully illuminating thematic expansion, we can hopefully get at the core of what's going on here for Aang personally and what it might mean for him to be picturing Zuko with the Blue Spirit mask as a fear. I want to put this moment into context with Aang and Zuko's relationship at this specific moment. Aang hasn't seen Zuko since he watched him cry over his uncle in the ghost town after Azula struck him with lightning as a diversion. That was ten episodes prior (and more than 6 months time if you were watching the show in real time as it premiered; May 26th-Dec. 1st). The next time Aang sees Zuko, two episodes later, they are glowering across a crystal prison cell at one another with antipathy as they're embraced (a gesture I can only remember from the fantastic black romance film Love & Basketball, and in a gay context that is clearly referencing that moment in L&B, in the Norwegian teen romance series Skam). Right before this scene, Aang readily agrees to co-rescue Zuko and Katara with Uncle Iroh despite Sokka's protestations. Nothing seems amiss with Aang, no obvious belligerence toward Zuko until he sees him. Zuko has barely seen the airbender this whole season, and the one moment they encountered one another, Zuko was attacking Aang's attacker rather than him. Why is Aang expressing anger toward Zuko in the crystal chamber then? It's a rare expression from Aang even when we look at their more antagonistic interactions from the first season.

Here's where this vision of the blue spirit Aang envisions as he opens his earth chakra might enliven his characterization and his relationship to Zuko. We get two pieces here. His attachment to Katara and the queer implications of his partnership with the Blue Spirit/Zuko. And they are inseparable.

I don't feel that I need to especially dive into the attachment to Katara since it's been a pretty big component of discourse within the fandom, both in general analysis and more specifically relating to the (literally historic) shipping wars between zutara and kataang that emerged after the series came out originally. What I'll say here is that the first vision that Aang has as he addresses his root chakra points to his fear of losing her and what she represents pretty explicitly and, as I suggested earlier, also provides its antidote in the realization that accepting/surrendering the fear of impermanence reveals its simultaneous illusion. Katara wasn't actually harmed and wasn't truly lost when the general subsumed her into the ground. Aang has to let go of her as a permanent fixture that he'll always be able to see and know entirely (not, as many have interpreted it, let go of loving her). He'll also have to let go of saving her and the world of so many others she represents, which is as much a pressure and role Katara and others put on him as Aang yolks himself to.

Part of this acknowledgement of Katara's impermanence as a living being and a romantic possibility is addressing the others in her life who pose both danger and attraction for her. Zuko embodies both of these things simultaneously. The aggressive stare Aang launches at Zuko in "The Crossroads of Destiny" can be understood through this lens. The Eve Sedgwick's concept of the triangulation of male homosocial desire between romantic rivals was one of the foundational ideas of queer theory. It's so well-established as to be a meme among the tumblr crowd. The show even references the history of these literary homosocial tropes in "The Avatar and the Firelord" as Sozin and Roku's tight-knit youthful friendship is slowly rent apart at the event of Roku's heterosexual marriage, which thus begins the imperialism of the Fire nation.

Except that Roku and Sozin aren't romantic rivals. And Zuko's obsession with Aang begins sans Katara. And, as you pointed out, if the romantic threat is Zuko, it ought to be Zuko in the Earth Chakra vision instead of the Blue Spirit? Well, those all exist because ATLA is not a tragedy for homosocial relationships, and it's hard for me to explain how groundbreaking that was.

You see, the show theorizes homosociality differently. If Aang is required to let go of Katara, he has no pivot point, no object (because women shouldn't be objects for male fodder!) to connect with and compete with a rival male, so he has to look directly at the desire of another male for him and, therefore, face the fears that he might have similar desires. I said above that the Blue Spirit is an entirely de-flamed Zuko, which I then paralleled to emasculation. One could even go farther to call it a kind of symbolic castration (Firelord Ozai losing his firebending at the end of the series certainly demands this kind of reading). These aspects ignite fears about lacking masculinity which then cause reactions, which make men avoid accepting any thoughts and behaviors associated with vulnerability and homosexuality invoked within themselves or by others.

I think Aang, in his way, is confronting these fears but not from the angle of someone raised within a homophobic or misogynistic culture. His openness to Zuko and the potential of connection to him is ripe from the first time they meet--"you're just a teenager" connects them without any intermediary. He comes to understand the rigidness of the environment he's in, though. He feels like he's being forced to choose between a yang/masculine role he plays with Katara, who at this point in the series though growing out of it and certainly not a fault of her own making still sees him as her savior and depends on him to save her and the world through metaphysical mastery and the repulsion of evil, and yin/feminine role he plays with Zuko, who finds Aang in and forces him into positions of elusion, surrender, and passivity, while requiring his compassion and forgiveness. When the Blue Spirit comes swinging his swords (read that with all the innuendos you want lol) at a shackled Aang, it's the ultimate expression of Aang's potential for submissiveness because, not only is he entirely helpless but the one who could harm or save him in that scenario is another who is not participating in the expected power of fire/yang/masculinity.

I think everything in the show says this is attractive to Aang--that he remains with Zuko immediately after their escape from the fort, that he reflects on the Blue Spirit as he opens his chakras, that a reference to the conversation that followed their escape that Zuko makes halts him in his tracks when Zuko asks to join the team. Zuko's Blue Spirit persona means a lot to Aang, a scary amount, and my point is that it's this fear of the meaningfulness of their encounter as two men who are not the masculine paragons they are supposed to be which Aang faces as he opens his chakra. As much as he wants Katara, he wants Zuko. He fears he'll lose Katara and he fears he'll lose his life to Zuko. These are the dichotomies he's tackling as he processes the Earth chakra.

Aang eventually opens the chakra, but that's only to say he acknowledges and surrenders his fears to a destiny and understanding beyond his control, not that he necessarily learns how to address and solve all the conundrums contained therein. We know he chooses his attachment to Katara at the end of the episode to obtain power over the Avatar state but perhaps we could've been clued into this choice by noticing he has not chosen Zuko with that initial glare Aang gives him. Aang hasn't found a way in his chakras or his heart to hold both Katara and Zuko at once, so he chooses Katara and expresses a newfound jealousy and rivalry toward Zuko (not that Zuko's at his best behavior at this point, but it's Aang who initiates the exchange).

By the end of this season, Zuko abandons the Blue Spirit mask and Aang loses his life for prioritizing Katara and a yang-centric mastery of the Avatar state. The next season involves all three of the protagonists finding more internal balance between yin and yang for themselves and accepting mutually reciprocal feelings for one another that allow them to escape the kinds of patriarchal tropes that have dominated Anglo- literature for centuries. The ability of this brief sequence to highlight so many of the series' central revolutionary themes speaks to the depth of the show and the way it invites the audience to think about rich subtext rather than pedantically hammer us with morals will just continue to be the gift that keeps giving from this show.

Thanks so much for asking! Didn't know how much I missed doing a deep dive into this kind of stuff.

#aanglove #zukaang #atla meta #the guru #guru pathik

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absolutebl · 11 months

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This week in BL - I am all over the place, But Laws of Attraction is Phenomenal af

July 2023 Wk 2

Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs. Organized by which ones (in each category) I’m enjoying most.

Ongoing Series - Thai

Laws of Attraction (Thai Sat iQIYI) 1 of 8 - Icky picked it up but it’s not airing for me until Sundays so I held this post specifically to watch and talk about this show. Stars the pair from To Sir With Love with the same production team. IT’S SO GOOD Y’ALL. A morally corrupted trickster lawyer with a tragic past, sad eyes, and a beautiful smile that he uses like a weapon. Meets paladin martial arts instructor from other side of the tracks (who is out, at least to his baby sister). Corrupt police. Spoiled rich kid evil. Ambitious politician. Tragic death. Terrible subs.* This show is very like Manner of Death but so far it is a much better/tighter story. It’s NOT BL but it is fucking phenomenal. And you shoudl watch it. Not wait to binge it. WATCH IT. On a global scale this might be the best thing currently airing featuring gay romantic leads. Its really fucking good. It’s Lawless Lawyer but more complex character motivation and gay af. Fuck yes please and thank you. FINALLY. Triggers for violence, beatings, death & torture depicted on screen. Like MoD they are not holding back. (* A lot of the familial names they are using are not gendered in Thai but translated as such, like “nephew”. This one is gonna go down a lot easier if you know some Thai.)

Step By Step (Tues WeTV & Gaga) ep 12fin - 2 years pass and no one’s hairstyle changes? Srs. Them meeting again = hella AWKWARD. Both still pining & hurt. NO SINGING. The reconciliation scene was great. I enjoyed that on the “do over relationship” they went with phi/pom (instead of the super formal khuns). So cute and so much more relaxed. Also lots of neck kisses! Charming final ep. It’s only flaw being they dropped the side couple, but I wasn’t really into them anyway. Ultimately? This is what Boss & Babe should have been and could we please have Up lead out another BL? I miss him and he only gets prettier. Full review below.

La Pluie (Sat iQIYI) ep 12fin - I adore the tiny little baby GL thread that we almost got. And I wish we had had more of it throughout the show. The side couple turned out to be good too. Emotional crying kisses are my favorite. Sunshine netted himself an earnest serious romantic boy, we likey. As for the main couple? Well... Tai’s search story arc was dull and dragging in a final ep and it felt bloated and slow as a result. It was a good confession reunion with Tai figuring all of his shit out, not surprising but fine. Kind of a a weak final ep. Full review below.

Hidden Agenda (Thai Sun GMMTV YouTube) ep 1 of 12 - JoonDunk are back and we have all seen this a million times before, but Thailand never executed a successful formula it didn’t want to repeat a million times over, drunk bathroom and everything. Welcome (back) to Thai BL (and back and back and back). Basically they just added glasses, a new 1-shared-brain-cell friendship group, and different uni departments. Ah GMMTV, forever trying to recreate the magic of 2gether. But also I’m enjoying it. I’m a simple person. (Hi Jamie! Still in college since 2018 I see.) Anyone else notice that Chinese phrase that they did not translate for us? Mmm hum. Cute. Still... NO SINGING.

Low Frequency (Sat iQIYI) ep 2 of 8 - Thames is in coma and getting slagged off on the socials. It’s moving a bit slowly but the premise is interesting despite the poor quality of the execution.

Dinosaur Love (Sun iQIYI) ep 3 of 8 eps - Major trigger for self harm depicted on screen in part 2/4. I skipped it. Then there is assault and verbal abuse. I told you Ultimate Troop is NOT to be trusted.

Be Mine Super Star (Mon Viki) ep 2 of 12 - Look, I don’t really mind this show but I also don’t like second hand embarrassment and I sense a metric butt ton incoming.

Be My Favorite (Fri YouTube) ep 8 of 12 - I was not best pleased with this episode. Ya’ll round the tumblr-sphere seem to be enjoying it but I have officially hit the wall on Kawi. There is not enough booze for me to cope with his shizz. I may be alone in this. But gotta say how I feel... Unlike him. Trash watch here.

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Tokyo in April is... AKA Shigatsu no Tokyo wa (Japan Thurs Gaga) ep 5 of 8 - Poor Ren, he feels compelled to take on the burden of protecting everyone from sexual assault because he blames himself. And he can’t even talk to his boyfriend about it. Oh fuck me the pair of shoes at the door. And neck kisses? TOO MUCH. Argh. Japan. Why must you hurt so good?

Stay By My Side (Taiwan Fri Gaga) 3 of 10 eps - It’s a very cute show. All the tropes and archetypes with no fuss or attempts to be clever, just executing them (sometimes over and over again). Even hiccoughs as a result of flirting! I haven’t seen that one in ages. The show feels old fashioned as a result. Nostalgic. I’m good with that.

Tie The Not (Pinoy YouTube) ep 6 of 8 - Sad boys still sad now drunk. (Noooooo shoes on bed! Argh.) Finally kisses! Also good ones for a large portion of this ep. Plus hair pulling. And verse rep! And after sex convo. Then side dishes have a whole proper gay ax covo about top/bottom. Everyone say thank you Philippines! get down with your queer selves!

Stupid Genius (Vietnam Fri YouTube) ep 6fin - I believe this was the final episode. It was cute. This is a standard sort of semi-crappy VBL high school drama. Enjoyable in its floppy friendliness, weirdly like a queer after school special promoting education. Dead fish kisses but fine for what it is. 7/10

Minato's Laundromat Season 2 AKA Minato Shouji Coin Laundry Season 2 (Japan Thu Gaga) 2 of 12 eps - Activate cohabitation trope. They okay bfs. Minato not as frustrating this week, but still frustrating for me and Shin. Next week = cute outfits and dumb miscommunication yay!

Vian the series (Vietnam YouTube ) ep 11 of 12 - again it didn’t show up on my dash in time for this. I’ll pop it into next week.

It’s airing but ...

House of Stars (Thai Mon iQIYI) 12 eps - I bounced at ep 3. Will binge if told it is worth it at end.

Stay (Pinoy YouTube) 7 eps - It’s mostly English & set in LA (shudder) so I’m not bothering.

Stay With Me ... NO I WILL NOT! And you can’t make me.

Ended This Week

Step By Step Series Review

This was Thailand’s answer to The New Employee, and everything I loved about that show I loved about this one. This was an office romance between stern boss and sweet subordinate that felt more authentic to an office environment than previous Thai BLs of this ilk. And that authenticity added tension to the narrative and character development (how novel). Now that might be because it has western source material, or it might be because it is actually kind of old-fashioned (it’s been years since I worked as an office grunt). I also really enjoyed the brothers’ relationship, and kinda wished they hadn’t attempted (and failed) to give said brother his own side BL. That one flaw made it a 9/10 for me. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED.

La Pluie Series Review

This BL takes to task the fated mates trope and what it means to have love chained intimately to predestination. It’s about how faith in destiny before choice diminishes the authenticity of emotion, relationships, and connection. This is a high concept to examine through the lens of a BL. By activating + examining the soulmates trope this show is challenging a foundation of romance: the idea that there is one person meant to be your one romantic partner all your life. This means that we, as viewers, spend much of the show worried about it having a happy ending, and that’s the source of both its brilliance and tension: would the narrative have the strength to truly challenge its own romantic core? But, ultimately, all this elevated complexity was executed in a somewhat shaky manner with the narrative derailing into some serious pacing issues and characters manipulated by miscommunication. However, with good chemistry and decent acting all around, plus some excellent high heat and representation of consent and a few other rare tropes, this one has to (like it’s sibling show My Ride) earn a 9/10. I enjoyed it even as it made me think, so despite its flaws: HIGHLY RECOMMENDED.

Next Week Looks Like This:

Starting:

7/19 Wedding Plan (Thai Wed YouTube & iQIYI) - It's Mame and she's coming for our GL. She's such a misogynist IMAGINE what we will get with a GL side dish? It's going to be absolute carnage. To crane your neck as you drive by the car wreck or not? That is the question. Me? I'm wallowing in the guts. Trying to decide to trash watch or not...

7/20 Jun & Jun (Korea Thu Viki) - From 2022 I CAN’T FUCKING WAIT! So excited for this one.

2023 forthcoming BL master post (see comments, some are inaccurate, NOT KEPT UPDATED)

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

FYI roselle juice is made from hibiscus (a flower) so technically neither a tea nor a juice. (Hidden Agenda)

Tie the Not = all the verse rep this ep. I love this for them.

The giggling was SO DAMN CUTE (Step by Step, na?)

We all guessed it but it was still fun. (Stupid Genius) Also miracles of miracles, two actors who actually look like they could be brothers play brothers.

First time I’ve seen faen translated as significant other. (Laws of Attraction)

THE PAIN! (Tokyo)

(Last week.)

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zahri-melitor · 7 months

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Some more coherent thoughts about Gotham War, now it's settled on me.

(Spoilers below cut, for length and as it's still only Wednesday)

It's not a huge surprise, but Selina's whole 'train henches to steal from the rich non-violently!' ended up being a complete side issue that only existed to get the plot moving. Nobody's conception of this plot, in two years time, will really include this detail, despite the thousands of words spent arguing how ridiculous it was.

Yes it remains a poorly thought out plan on Selina's part (she's never heard of earning money legally) but the narrative also frames it as long term ineffective from the very first issue and knocks it down on multiple occasions.

DC editorial definitely tried to dress this up as a full family event, but realistically it was a Bruce, Selina and Jason event, written by their three current writers, with solid bit parts played by Tim and Dick.

Vandal Savage remains ridiculous and ready to sacrifice anyone and I appreciate that about him. As a villain he was just the right level of stakes for this event.

I enjoyed getting to see Scandal, even if her fans would say she got done dirty here. Scandal usually has enough sense not to believe anything Vandal says, and I admit I was somewhat waiting for some level of twist here as to why Scandal was all for immortality at this point in time, but it never came.

I still agree it felt a lot like three separate plotlines intersecting, but I think they managed to land the event successfully (while leaving some nice loose threads). I actually appreciate they didn't overreach in their goals.

It still finished out with two separate plotlines: Bruce and Selina and Jason; and Dick and Tim and the rest of the family. Structurally this again reminded me as much of Resurrection of Ra's Al Ghul as Batman #138 did; the main plot and then the far more interesting Dick & Tim sideplot which is what I go back to reread. (Chip Zdarsky is clearly also a fan)

Also promisingly for an event yes, it did actually shake up the status quo and push the participants off in new directions.

So Bruce is now doing the Loner Batman thing (in that he's locked out of the fam computers/comm lines), Selina is officially 'dead' (what is with all these fake dead people with titles, Penguin is too right now), and Jason has what's effectively permanent fear toxin response to stressful situations. Also, apparently, we are getting Dick and Barbara back 'running' the Batfam while Bruce is on the outs.

As far as Bruce goes, what has been really notable in this event is how much Chip Zdarsky loves early 2000s Bat comics and their dynamics, and particularly Joker's Last Laugh. There's a lot of structural things about how this event was shaped, what specific characters did, and emotional beats that feel very JLL as someone who's read it at least half a dozen times. It's not the only influence, but it's a pretty prominent one.

Bruce ending the event in a position where he's effectively not working with most of the other Bats actually tracks reasonably well over to Batman & Robin, to my surprise. It makes sense that it's just Bruce and Damian and they're focusing on homelife and domestic relationship details between the two. It gives Bruce an excuse for why he's closely focused on Damian there.

I will admit I have not been reading Catwoman, but from the event it seems they're spinning her off to keep moving her back into a more antihero position. Tini Howard clearly has a direction she wants to take Selina.

I actually think this has pretty interesting storytelling potential for Jason. It means that he has to stay calm, or has to overcome his own fear to achieve things. It gives him a goal? Matthew Rosenberg clearly seems interested in using it for his Jason storytelling and he's got Jason right now, so...

I'm personally delighted by how much Tim Zdarsky wrote into this storyline. He used the space more to show off Dick and Tim's brotherhood and what Tim is good at, rather than push the Tim side of the Zur story we're all expecting to occur (there's that waiting Zur-Robin costume). Means he's planning it for Batman as a title itself rather than getting it tangled up here.

"It was the only way to become the second-best Robin". Yes, this is Tim getting to show off his core competencies - he probably is the only Bat other than Bruce who would have extensively studied all the trophies. Dick would remember a lot of them simply because a lot of the trophies are from old adventures, but pretty much all the others are not particularly retrospective, respect the past sort of members of the group, while Tim has always been surrounded by the shadows of the past. I loved this note.

I haven't talked about Babs yet! She's in green, in glasses, sitting down at her computers with a novelty mug, directing everyone, answering to Oracle. That's her! That's my Oracle!

I do think Bruce expecting Dick to take over running the Batfam right now is a big ask, given he's also running the Titans as the main superhero team on the planet and handling Bludhaven, but Tom Taylor's writing both those books so I don't expect to see the stress catching up with Dick there. Benefits of writer choice right now, I guess. Also personally 'Babs and Dick organise everyone while Bruce has a breakdown elsewhere' is one of my favourite Batfam dynamics so you know, I'm pretty excited if we actually get to see this play out.

New Lazarus Pit in Gotham! This won't be a problem at all.

#z canon read throughs #gotham war #gotham war spoilers #tuesday spoilers #newish comics

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perfectlyfinespacebacon · 8 months

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everything now netflix

some spoilers!! and apologies for the long post.

i honestly really enjoyed it! it was almost like a skins/euphoria but imbued with like a heartstopper/sex education vibe in the sense that it dealt with serious teenage issues/mental health but light enough that it doesn't weigh down on you. my character thoughts:

mia was so infuriating almost at all times. obviously under the circumstances, it makes sense but there's this level of likeability that was missing for me. maybe it was the writing or the acting who knows but in my mind it's like this: im making an albeit an unfair comparison to effy from skins or even rue from euphoria, but they were battling their demons and making all the wrong choices but there was still this level of “i want to root for them” that's missing with mia personally.

in a similar vein with alison, she is meant to be this popular rich mean girl archetype who surprises you but obviously in the first half of the season she's supposed to be kind of unlikeable but i found her very endearing. as for the relationship, alison and mia DO NOT belong together. like at all. i am not rooting for them. alison in a way forced a relationship with mia and then also mia was like too scared to say anything about it. its clear that alison liked mia waaaaay more than mia liked alison. like carli says in the last ep as well, “to learn to not be a fantasy to each other”, alison needs to take mia off this pedastal she has for her. i'm very interested to learn more about her character outside of mia though if they hopefully continue the show. i have a feeling that we are supposed to think that she and cameron hooked up at the end or something but i'm rlly hoping its a red herring.

carli is also a character i would love to learn more about. she definitely has more chemistry with mia and i love her for standing her ground against mia, as she needs to help herself before she can be in a healthy relationship. but i will say it was pretty shitty stringing cameron along.

speaking of cameron, i didn't quite expect to like his character as much as i did. in a way his arc in the season is battling toxic masculinity as he kinda seems to come off as this laid back, bro kinda guy but he cares and loves so deeply. it wasn't right calling bec a "sket". i'm not british but obviously its like equivalent to slut, and im very glad he owned up to it. i'm also really interested to know more about his family and stuff.

i love bec as well. she deserves all the happiness in the world. im glad she was able to air out her things with mia, albeit in a very treacherous way and i also love how her mom was supportive of the abortion. i'm honestly kinda tired seeing the mom kicking out the daughter for getting pregnant trope so it was nice to see a mom just being supportive. bec is just such a wonderful friend and mia honestly has a lot to make up for. re not telling mia about her and cam, it was honestly frustrating seeing mia be so petty. i understand that its a big secret and she felt like everyone was hiding things from her but its also right to have secrets amongst friends, idk that really stuck out to me.

will for me had the weakest arc as in it wasn't the most interesting to me. don't get me wrong, i love the character but it just wasnt giving a whole lot to me. i recognize him as more than the comic relief but also at the same time he was stirring the pot in a lot of the arguments / blowups the group had, consciously and unconsciously. though i will say will x theo <3 but comedic duo of the century is will x alison. the little song they did for mia's birthday is stuck in my head.

tldr; great characters and great show. it's really hard to find a show about teens as a 25yo living in a 16yo body that i enjoy and don't find annoying. i just love how each character was able to be so nuanced despite being an ensemble cast.

but knowing netflix's track record it's gonna get cancelled because a) it's good b) has wlw content... but i really hope not.

#everything now #everything now netflix #mia polanco #becca #cameron #will #alison #carli #sophie wilde #niamh mccormack #jessie mae alonzo #harry cadby #lauryn ajufo #noah thomas

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asexualbookbird · 5 months

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BEHOLD! BOOKS I READ IN 2023!

A handful of rereads, a lot of new favorites, and I put a huge dent in my physical unread piles! I'm pretty happy with my reading year to be honest!

BEST OF 2023

Nettle and Bone by T Kingfisher - If I haven't talked about it enough please read this. An absolute DELIGHTFUL start to the year, which is odd to say of a book about abusive spouses and dead sisters. Like. I wanted to reread it right after finishing it, and will probably reread it this coming year, I loved it so much

The Untethered Sky by Fonda Lee - also heart wrenching but listen, there are BIRDS! Giant birds!!!! A strange pick me up during a bad time, but it WORKED!

To Shape A Dragon's Breath by Moniquill Blackgoose - Oh what a marvelous read, a delightful adventure, I look forward to book two!

Provenance by Ann Leckie - don't hate me, but I think I might enjoy this more than the Imperial Radch trilogy. It's really what I wanted from A Memory Called Empire, and it was so much fun to see the Radchaai from a different perspective!

The Liar's Knot by MA Carrick - DEROSSI VARGO, MY BELOVED! But also, this has such rich worldbuilding. Every time there's a Pattern reading in a scene, the authors did their own reading in real life and put the results in the book. They came up with multiple calendars for the world. And it never feels overwhelming, everything is integrated so naturally! Ren heists an entire family for her and her sister. A lovely brick of a book :)

Where the Drowned Girls Go by Seanan McGuire - I think this might be my favorite Wayward Children book so far, I'm glad these books are bite sized because I want to read them over and over <3

The Raven Tower by Ann Leckie - WHAT A FUNKY LITTLE BOOK!

WORST OF 2023

Black Wings Beating by Alex London - birds would not fucking do that. Why are we following the most insufferable of the characters. Why is everything about him, even the parts about his sister. Blegh.

Ninth House by Leigh Bardugo - this canNOT be the same book tumblr couldn't stop talking about for months. I know I shouldn't judge a book by its sequel, but I know about the glowing demon dick. Come on. Also, like, the whole book was building up to rescuing someone and then THEY NEVER DID! wtf lol

Tress and the Emerald Sea by Brandon Sanderson - Snooze. Yawn. Snore. One of the most boring books I've read. I was right to avoid Mr Sandwich and his books.

Whalefall by Daniel Kraus - I feel bad because someone hyped this a lot and was excited about it, and so I was excited about it, but it read like it was written specifically for a movie in mind. It's just Daddy Issues™️in the ocean.

This does not include rereads, of which Name of the Wind was one. Yes, I still loved that one. Still fun, still weird that it never felt long despite being a BRICK. Proof I don't hate long books because they're long, I hate long books that don't have to be long. Which is why the Dishonorable mention goes to Priory of the Orange Tree lol Get edited, beloathed.

Anyway! Onwards to 2024! :)

#bookbird babbles #books #booklr #reading wrap up #yearly wrap up #yearly wrap up 2023

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ircn-dad · 2 years

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Sometimes I think about Tony's life before Iron Man and I just feel bad for that man.

He spent his entire childhoods in a house where he wasn't loved for who he was. His dad didn't payed attention to him and mentally abused him (idk if in the MCU he was physically abused too, but I wouldn't be surprised if he was), his Mother- even if she wasn't bad and was lovely- always tried to justify Howard's action towards him (during the BARF scene we can see an example of her actions). Living in a house like this, where you feel no one is at your side is exhausting. Where everyone expect from you the best, and even if you try it, you won't ever be enough for your parents.

He entered at MIT at only fourteen, so that means (I guess) he never went to school with his peers. At seven years old he enters at the Philips Academy and it's a secondary school. Despite his outgoing behaviour, I don't think a little kid is comfortable around people much older. I don't think he even had real friends before going to MIT because even if he was more mature than his age, I don't believe a lot of teenagers or pre teens were ready to befriend with a kid.

So, no friends at school and not a good relationship with his family. He must have felt lonely for 14 years, and when he goes to MIT he decides to change. He puts a mask on and begins his new behaviour. He starts going to parties, to drink and to act cool around people to be liked and appreciated. I remember reading some fake testimonials that Marvel made to honorate the release of Iron Man 3, testimonials about how some ex students remembered Tony at MIT and two of them said:

“No one really knew him, he was just a rich kid. Everyone wanted him around, though, because he'd always bring something fun for the party.”

“I remember him at after-parties on Thayer Street. He was up later than anyone else. But you could always get a ride home with him, because he always had a car.”

No one knows the real him because that's what he does: he hides him self behind parties, fun and this kind of stuff to just be noticed by someone. Some people might say that he just wants to be at the centre of the attention, and yes that's true and it is a bad thing, but ever wondered why? Imagine being a kid, who has no friends, who's father hates you and you feel like no one will ever love you, until you find a way to be finally appreciated. You found a way to have someone who notices you after years of loneliness. I can't speak for everyone, but I would have done the same thing.

He keeps doing this for years and years. He lost his parents, he lost Jarvis and he has to take responsibility for his father's company at 21. He doesn't want that, he just wants to have fun and to distract him self from the reality because half of his life, at the time, was just empty, with no one taking care of him. So he practically leaves the company to Obadiah and he just spends more than 10 years trying to fill that void.

Why do you think he was a playboy?

Now... I don't know if that could be possible in the MCU, but in the comics he was assaulted at fourteen by a woman who was way older thank him That was the first time ever he was touched by someone like that, and even if he was a genius I wouldn't be too surprised (again) to find out he was taking refuge from his problems in s*x. He probably thought that was love, that the only reason someone could really love him was to make s*x with them and to make them feel pleasured (we could apply this logic even if he wasn't assaulted). I can think of other fictional characters who are Playboys (Barney Stinson from "how I met your mother" for example) in which is heavily implied that the only reason they act that way is because they need to feel loved.

Ten years of doing this, and you think he would be able to recover? Ofc no.

He has Rhodey, He has Pepper, He has Happy (and he has Obadiah but we don't talk about that man in this house), He has moneys, fame, he can finally have fun, he can drink and have all the women he wants. His life seems perfect, but we all know that's a lie.

He has everything, but he still has nothing, as Yinsen said.

And Tony, after being kidnapped for three months knows that. He knows his whole life was empty at that point. He said it him self when Yinsen asked him if he had a family out the cave. He just said no, he thinks no one is waiting for him to come back. For 38 years of his life he had nothing to live for, and even though we know how much his friends cared about him, he's not aware of that because he thinks they care for the mask he created for him self when he was young. At the age of 38, he still thinks no one could ever love the real him, because he doesn't love him self.

That's why I hate when people says he's immature, narcissistic and egocentric. Is he aware he is a genius? Yes. It's not bad to know that, especially when everyone expected him to be one since he was born. But that doesn't mean he's narcissistic. He acts like he's better than everyone else, but in reality he feels like the worst person ever. How can a narcissistic person think how their girlfriend deserves so much better than him? (As he said in Iron man 3). How can someone be egocentric and then puts other's life before him every single time, or when he's one of the few who cared for everyone, and who was ready to sacrifice himself for a world who never loved him? How can people even assume he thinks he's better than everyone when he admits himself he's just a man in a tin can?

If you can't see that during all the movies that he covers him self with an armour- not iron man, an INVISIBLE ARMOUR made of humour, sarcasm and fake self-esteem- to protect him self from further pain, then I suggest you to rewatch the movies.

Tony Stark is one of the most human and well written characters in the MCU, it's sad that not a lot of fans (and almost everyone in the marvel universe as well) can't see that.

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bluejayyz · 2 months

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Doodle World Awesome Squad from my Mind Palace 👾👾

Design Explanation Paragraphing under the cut !!!! Where I really talk about the how and why of it all ^<^

So excited to post this !! I do hope ye all like it, I was super excited seeing people like/reblog my last post as I've felt a little awkward posting Doodle World art just due to not knowing anyone else who played the game eeeekk.. BUT these are my 'headcannons', I guess you could call them; for the main Doodle World group !!!

> Suzie : The shortest of the group at 5'2"!! Due to the body type used for her in-game, I have always pictured her as being on the bigger side!! Her hair is like a Jellyfish cut, if you guys are familiar with that. Or.. well that's how I interpret what is happening. And I think she looks totally cutieful <3 I draw her with blue eyes for reasons unknown to myself, I have just always given her blue. Her pants are worn/faded at the knees and slightly frayed at the end. Her footwear is closer to boots than runners!! She is in-game, shown to be closer with the player, and that stays to be true in my version of them also.. I think they would have matching friendship bracelets...

> Quincy : Second tallest at 5'7.5" [didn't originally care about the .5, until it was a way to one up the player]. Got rid of those awful glasses he wears... please take them off Quincy.. gave him regular white frames specs instead!! He is a little blind. Also grey-ish eyes?? Again no reasoning. Is on the slimmer side in my mind, not much muscle, because I believe he was a sheltered, rich kid who didn't have to do much- until this adventure, of course. His outfit also doesn't make much sense for travel because well.. I don't think he really expected all this running around we have been doing. His shoes are bright white, and his jeans look brand new. His shirt is pressed !!! ..He has grown on me a lot I can't lie, I never disliked him, though.

> TJ : Tallest of the group!! 6'0"!! He has always just felt tall to me.. maybe that is crazy. He has wider shoulders that sort of replicate his in-game model, as opposed to Quincy, I do believe TJ has worked out/exercised at times :P His outfit is more relaxed, I debated with sweatpants for a while, I do think baggy jeans suit but either or make sense to me. The knees of his jeans are slightly worn, his hoodie is definitely bigg and comfy, and his shoes are definitely made for maximum comfort and running around. Hair change going off model simply because I like this style a lot more, and I think it suits him really well, and then brown eyes !! He also has thicker eyebrows than Suzie and Quincy, no major reason I just think thick eyebrows rock !!!1

And finally, not really necessary;

The Player! Or in this case

> Jay : Standing at 5'7" to replicate myself, Jay is a mix of me and my roblox avatar in looks. She has broader shoulders, which are very much hidden under the baggy hoodie. She also has thicker eyebrows, matching TJ. His outfit is similar to Quincy's on the pure coincide of that is what my avatar was wearing when I first joined Doodle World and finding it funny, I've kept the matching rival outfits since. Despite the similarity to Quincy's clothes, Jay's are very much perfect for this adventure (the main reason being the jumper shirt combo is fake!! It is one item of clothing... he has been lying to you). The jeans are baggy, worn, faded, and fraying in places- but the extra pockets really do come in handy at times. Also a glasses wearer!! As I'm very much far from 20/20 vision.. and of course; train track braces !!! Let's goo !!!!

Well, that has been an absolute ramble session !! I hope that made sense if you did read all that. I mainly just wanted to explain how I see the characters and my reasonings, if any.. behind why. Especially if I want to post more artwork of them all :D!!!

#art #bluejayyz art #doodleworld #doodle world #doodleworld fanart #doodleworld art #doodle world roblox #doodleworld quincy #doodleworld suzie #doodleworld TJ #my headcannons #eeeekk so much funn

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diodellet · 1 year

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hypothermia (capitano x fem!reader)

Note: Characters depicted and featured are based on Herbarium (I imagine that this short fic takes place sometime in part IX. whopperflower) so go and read that before you read this fic!! content warnings: -afab/female!reader, yandere!capitano -dubcon (darling isn't in the right mental space at the start of the act but grows to enjoy it) -chastising self-talk and emotional turmoil from darling's abusive backstory (last reminder to read Herbarium^^!!) ++oral, hair pulling, riding, size difference, lots of lovey dovey hurt/comfort feelings and some nude intimacy in the bath word count: 5.1k words minors do not interact

The pad of your index finger toys with the edge of the page, turning it this way and that, while making sure not to leave a single crease or wrinkle on the paper. How many times have you reread the same line, skimming it again and again yet never quite absorbing the material? Your attention, despite itself, drifts back to his earlier words.

"The Maier son is dead."

How many were dead because of you? How many had he injured in the name of protecting you? You don't dare to glance away from the book you had sat in your lap. Nor do you dare to raise your head. You continue to feign the fact that you were interested in the story in front of you. Some story about a peasant girl attending a ball, reuniting with her first love who became a knight at the same time enamoring a rich nobleman who—

You don't jump at the sound of him calling your name. Instead you stubbornly keep your attention down, on the girl being tugged back and forth between the two men, the narrative likening her to a hapless butterfly, flapping its wings and only growing more trapped in the spider's web, dizzy from the sweet allure of the flower's nectar—

Capitano calls your name a second time. His low voice rumbles from within his chest, making you shudder involuntarily. It is all you have as a warning before one of his hands lands on your shoulder. The other plucks the book you were reading out of your grasp. "Hey—" You startle, stretching an arm out to take it back. The tips of your fingers graze against the edges of the leather cover, only to fall short out of reach.

Your eyes meet his. "Do I have your attention now?"

The retort dies on your lips and you shut your mouth, instead opting to frown. To make your displeasure visible. His palm is warm, an ever-present heat beckoning you to look at him. To lean into him. To respond, at the very least. Anything to dispel the chilling realization that you were alone.

The Maier son is dead. Your ex-foster parents are dead. You are alone in this land of ice and snow. No home, no more family rooting you in Mondstadt. You only have your husband now.

He isn't frowning, per se. You remember how the air turns cold when he's staring down insubordinate recruits, when he's mildly inconvenienced by Tartaglia's cheekiness, or even when he's gotten fed up with your petulant avoidance.

But this emotion coloring his features...

...he almost looks concerned for you. Maybe you're just not used to him taking off his mask within the walls of your home. But it's making you painfully aware that you're being seen.

Your gaze bows down to look at your clenched fists in your lap. "I'm listening now." You internally wince at the curt tone your voice has taken. This isn't how you were supposed to show gratitude to the person who has done nothing except provide warmth, safety, a home you could call your own.

"It can wait." The past few days have felt like a haze and his gentleness cuts through the fog clouding your thoughts. It's almost comforting, yet at the same time, your mind reminds you that he was responsible for—or maybe at the very least, that he might've played some part in the death of your ex-foster family. "Have you been thinking about the Maiers?"

"No," you say quickly, reaching out to grasp his hand. Your grip tightens, a plea for him to believe you. Your sleep has been far from peaceful, soured by bits and pieces of nightmares you can barely remember. How can you not think of your former family after being delivered such news?

Capitano's eyes widen by a mere fraction, before settling back into his neutral expression. "Don't be mistaken." The way he punctuates your name sends a shiver down your spine. "They might have fashioned themselves as a family, whether that be on paper or in front of others. But their treatment towards you was unbecoming and downright cruel of one. They do not deserve such a title anymore."

Panic clutches your throat. Has he seen through your words? You need to rectify that now.

Now, you stupid girl!

Instead, you swallow the words you wanted to counter. "I'm sorry...I'm—I think I'm just..." You don't know what else to say. Guilt wells up from within your stomach, a second 'sorry' lodges itself in your throat. You should have been grateful.

Ever the patient man, Capitano places his other palm atop yours.

You belatedly realize that it was easy to forget that you were in the care of a man who held more than just political renown. He was equally capable of extinguishing your life with his own hands if he wanted to. The way his hands dwarfed yours in comparison is a blaring reminder despite the warm gesture.

"Capitano, will you—" At the sound of his name, his hand shifts, encompassing yours in even more heat. It's dizzying.

Would you come with me? Stay with me? You want to ask, yet the words won't leave your throat.

Your fingers flex, letting the rough lines of his callused palm brush against yours before you pull away. "...nevermind, I'll—" you swallow, the next words leave your lips in a rush. "I'll go now."

[...]

The walk to your shared bedroom from the office does little for your buzzing thoughts. Your side of the bed is cold. Even after burrowing under the sheets, shivers wrack your frame as your meager body heat adjusts to the temperature.

He didn't allow you to run away that quickly though, stopping you in your tracks with a single call of your name before sending you off with a chaste kiss against your knuckles and—

...returning to his paperwork.

In hindsight, you think you should have asked for your book back.

Now alone, your mind spirals back to your earlier conversation with Capitano. He has and continues to see through you. You, with all your faint blemishes and little imperfections and scabbed over wounds—

You squeeze your eyes shut, what were you even trying to say before you left? At this point, you were no different from the hapless maiden in the storybook. No, you were worse, you might as well have waltzed into the spider's lair and narrowly danced out of its grasp before succumbing to the elements.

What were you trying to tell him? That you wanted him to soothe and comfort you? To take you to bed and to make you forget about your former family?

The train of thoughts continues in such a manner, twisting and looping back in on itself, leaving you on the cusp of sleep and awareness. Faintly, you register the edge of the bed dipping with a new entrant's weight. He's sitting next to you, laying a hand on your resting form.

Was he saying something to you? You can't make it out over the rush of blood in your ears. A stuffy sensation clouds your mind, leaving you vulnerable to his touch.

You hear the sound of your name being called, feel the heat of his palm sliding down the curve of your hip. Your building nervousness seizes your throat, but you adamantly force your body to remain still.

The edge of your dress hikes higher up, past your knees, past your thighs. Your eyes fly open at the sensation. Now bared to the cold, goosebumps prickle along the skin of your legs. In spite of that, a stubborn heat gathers in your cheeks, traveling down your spine, pooling in your lower stomach. Capitano nudges your legs apart, his hands settle atop the waistband of your underwear.

"You were awake." He observes—no, he knew all along—that you were feigning sleep.

Weakly shaking your head, you correct him, "I just woke up." It's a bad lie, but your other option was confirming what he already knew. The heat of his palms haven't left your sides, his fingertips dip beneath the soft fabric. "...are you going to continue?" you ask him.

A part of you hopes he wouldn't. "Would you like me to?" Your pulse speeds.

Wordlessly, you raise your hips, allowing him to fully slip off your underwear. It's not quite an answer, but it's a response that he takes in stride. After setting your underwear aside, he pulls your hips flush against him. His hand grazes against your crotch and your breath hitches.

Pulling away, the tips of his fingers are covered in clear arousal, thin viscous strings clinging to the ends of the digits. You move to close your legs, but the larger man has his other hand resting on your knee, keeping you exposed. Open to his ministrations.

His gaze is boring down on you, freezing you in place. And despite the trepidation coursing through you, a small—nonetheless needy—part of you wants him. The only reassurance he gives you is the slow stroke of his thumb against your knee.

The Captain doesn't spin his words with empty fluff and roundabout double-meanings. The same can be said for the way he touches you. Spread them wider.

Taking the cue, you scoot back. Letting him lean closer to you, letting him into your space. He presses his lips to the sensitive skin, trailing gentle kisses along your leg. The intimacy of the gesture isn't what makes you flinch. You can't help the quiet pained noises tearing from your throat when you feel the graze of his teeth. Red imprints—you are sure they will bruise—obscure the scars that marked your legs.

Capitano runs a hand along your inner thigh, the pads of his fingers moving closer and closer to your leaking cunt. As if he were attempting to soothe the trembling that seized your frame. He's close—too close, his breath ghosting along your core elicits a choked gasp from you. You press your lips shut, clap a hand over your mouth for added measure. The insistent heat clinging to the back of your neck creeps higher, setting your cheeks alight.

"W-wait," you weakly protest. "I can't keep my voice in—"

He stops short of making contact with your sex, gaze flicking up to meet yours. His other hand pushes a lock of his hair out of his face, tucking it behind his ear. "If my precious flower is overtaken with pleasure, then she should be as vocal as she likes." His words are muffled as he drags the flat of his tongue up against your slit.

The effect is instantaneous, your head thumps back against the mattress. You can barely hear his next words over the sound of your heartbeat in your ears. "Don't hold yourself back, my dear." Capitano's voice takes a low, dangerous tone. It's all you have as a warning before he seals his mouth over your clit and sucks hard.

Your fingers find purchase on the crown of his head, digging into his scalp. Now uncovered, moans and gasps freely pour from your lips. Your hips buck against the stimulation, aching to bring yourself closer to Capitano. You feel one of his digits prodding at your entrance, effortlessly slipping inside and moving in tandem with his mouth. It doesn't take long for him to find that sensitive bundle of nerves, doesn't take long for that building heat in your lower stomach to coil tighter and tighter, edging you closer to release—

Your first orgasm washes over you, making you cry out. Your grip on Capitano tightens, pulling at his hair and eliciting a deep groan from him. The sound seems to reverberate through your frame, making you moan in response. Through the haze of your vision, you see his demeanor is languid as he continues to envelop your clit in warmth. His eyes are closed in bliss, and his other hand idly runs along an old scar making the back of your thigh. The movement of his fingers inside you slows—not that the speed mattered in the first place, the size of two of his fingers, every movement is—enough to send sparks of pleasure throughout your lower half, drawing out your release for longer.

But when the wave of pleasure runs its course, he doesn't release you from his hold. The heavenly warmth enclosing the nub tips into overstimulation.

"Capitano...it's too much..." Your words are airy from trying to catch your breath, yet your hips continue to cant against him. Greedy for more in spite of what your nerves were yelling you. "...h-hurts..." Tears gather at the corners of your eyes.

He gives you a moment of reprieve and releases the nub, leaving it shiny with spit and red from stimulation. You can feel it throb with your heart's pulse. Capitano doesn't leave you unattended for long though, his arm wraps around your waist and pulls you closer to his mouth. His tongue replaces his fingers, slipping into your entrance and coaxing out more of your arousal. You feel a mix of his saliva and your slick dripping and spilling onto the bed sheets.

"Hnn...Capitano—" you whine, trying to twist out of his grip.

The slow, tantalizing drag of his tongue along the length of your slit is intensified from his earlier ministrations, making you tremble. He hikes one of your legs over his shoulder to gain more access to your cunt.

"Just let me pleasure you," he tells you. You keen as his fingers press more bruises into your thighs. The way he says your name sends a rush of heat down your spine. It's as if you aren't some mere plaything in his hands. Capitano's touch, his words, his warmth—gentle and encompassing—it all makes you feel treasured. He puts his mouth on you again.

No matter how much you writhe, you are left helpless, caged in between the pleasure he's giving you and the mattress of your bed. Even if he isn't focusing on your overstimulated clit, every slight graze of his tongue against the swollen nub makes your toes curl. Your moans pitch higher, growing louder as you reach your peak for the second time. The only thing you can do is squeeze your thighs together, pull him against your core as you come.

God, it hurts—but why does it feel so good?

Stars explode behind your eyes. Your frame trembles with the aftershocks of your orgasm. The insistent heat that has been consuming your lower half pulls away. Without it, you're reminded of how empty you feel, in spite of being brought to release twice. It's as if you've become twice as vulnerable to the cold. But you can still feel his palms caressing the sides of your legs. The weight of Capitano's gaze on you makes you turn your head away, bring one of your arms up to obscure your face, the expression you were making—or it would have if he didn't catch your wrist

"Don't hide." It's the first request he's demanded from you. And you reluctantly obey, lowering your hand from your face, bring yourself to hold his gaze with your own. His hair is mussed up from your attempts to ground yourself. His expression softens for just a fraction of a second, eyes staring intently at you. You tense up as you feel his fingers interlock with yours. Of all things to send your pulse into a frenzy, it's this miniscule gesture—his insistence on being considerate.

How ironic, that it doesn't feel patronizing nor overbearing.

"Are you alright?" Capitano asks you. He wipes at his mouth with his free had removing the remnants of your arousal. For some reason the sight makes you shudder involuntarily. Butterflies are swarming in your stomach, choking out your words.

You can only muster a small nod as a response.

His thumb strokes the backs of your fingers. “Focus on catching your breath first.” Capitano gives your hand a squeeze before moving to rise from the bed. Possibly to draw a bath and to clean you up. A pinprick of dismay cuts through you at that thought, you’re empty and cold and you want—

Before you can think twice, your hand reaches out.

“Wait—” Capitano freezes at your touch. You’re shaking, but it isn’t because of the cold.

Swallowing, you pull yourself into a sitting position. Even the sensation of the bedsheets against your throbbing groin is enough to elicit a hitched breath from you. You clamp your mouth shut and fight the urge to shift your hips. How could you still crave more after that?

“W…will you let me…return the favor?” The last three words come out in a whisper. A part of you braces itself to repeat the question, but you thankfully will not have to. Your gaze glances downwards, at his ignored arousal straining against the fabric of his pants.

The silence of the room—his silence from scrutinizing you as well—is deafening. “...If you insist,” he relents.

Embarrassingly, your legs refuse to cooperate with your attempt to crawl towards him. You end up almost falling into his arms, collapsing against his chest. Stubbornly avoiding his gaze, your fingers fumble with the buttons of his shirt. They also refuse to cooperate with you, coming undone much too slowly. With the way you’re sitting in his lap, you can feel his erection against your bare lower half.

He calls your name. Your cheeks are blazing at this point. He grasps your wrists, making you pause. "You're rushing." If you didn’t immediately gratify his needs, how could you call yourself his spouse? This wasn’t enough.

"But, don't you…doesn't it hurt?" Only after have the words left your lips do you realize how naive you sound. Your fingertips linger on the end of a faint scar peeking out from the sliver of skin you were able to bare. Just like you, he holds a canvas of old wounds, injuries that have probably hurt a thousand times worse than what you went through.

His hold on your wrists does not hinder you from continuing to undress him. What does surprise you though is the quiet puff of amused laughter emanating from him. You pause for a second time to gaze at his face. The faintly bright expression, a glimmer of mirth in his irises…

At the rare sight, your pulse stutters in your chest.

“Your earnest determination is more than enough to satisfy me,” Capitano reassures you, lips drawn in a fond smile. You snap yourself out of your stupor and go to unbutton the rest of his shirt before he can catch you staring too intently, trying to commit the close-up sight to memory.

The sound of his laughter in your ears again tells you that you failed.

Your eyes stay pointed at his now-bare chest, run your gaze along the scars that you have uncovered. Lightly trace a finger along the line spanning from the base of his ribcage to his side. An injury sustained several months ago, possibly from a weapon with a serrated blade—the skin is uneven, didn’t heal as seamlessly. Your gaze flicks up to gauge his expression, if he was growing impatient.

But why? You didn’t have to look and double-check though. Underneath your other palm, his chest rises and falls with steady breaths.

Your hand moves to his side, an older scar this time—a stray arrow that grazed him, he didn’t realize that the wound was bleeding until long after the battle had ended. There are more scars marking his back, his legs, especially his hands and forearms. Accidents on the battlefield, vicious beasts, sudden betrayals, time was kind enough to leave some of them as faint white blemishes. As for the others—reminders of his early carelessness, inexperience, and overconfidence—he had eventually grown to accept them as part of his person.

But for you, seeing them again was just like seeing them for the first time.

“...I’m sorry…” The apology spills out from you. You can’t bear to imagine the weight of what he carried during each instance of pain. “...about earlier…I’m sorry.” For being insensitive, for ignoring you, for being ungrateful.

“I should be saying that to you.” Capitano’s fingers brush over a faint white line marring your wrist. His touch is kind, so much kinder than your previous partners. “You’re in pain.”

“Mine? No…” You shake your head. “These—they’re different, they’re…” you trail off. The words ‘unimportant, deserved, ugly’ dance on your tongue.

He lifts your chin with his hand. “Are they also not proof that you fought? That you survived?”

“Survived, maybe.” But you weren’t strong like him. Just cover them up, you want to say. Just take my body as you like and give me bruises in return. You don’t want to look at them. You don’t want him to see them.

Though, that choice wasn’t yours to make.

You swallow down the discomfort as his hands move to the hem of your dress. “Raise your arms,” he says in a soft voice. You obey and let him pull the garment over your head, baring the rest of your body. You feel him press his lips to the crown of your head. Goosebumps pimple your upper back, your arms come up to cover your chest out of reflex. He sets your dress aside and also removes his shirt.

The heat of Capitano’s palms finds your waist. “Let me see you.”

You make a weak sound of protest, but lower your arms and place them against his chest. It’s not that you aren’t able to support yourself, you’re sure that he can hold you up with one hand. Rather, it is the feeling of your arousal dripping along your inner thigh in spite of your mortification. The weight of his gaze is trained on your vulnerable form. Bashfully, you meet his eyes.

…it almost feels like adoration, a warm but ultimately unfamiliar sensation. You want to shy away.

Capitano’s hand moves lower, his thumb brushing against your clit. Your hips buck at the sensation. Breaking eye contact, you squeeze your eyes shut, suddenly overwhelmed at the budding pleasure between your legs. No, this wasn’t right, you were supposed to be pleasuring him.

Your eyes fly open. “N-no…wait, let me…” Somehow you find your voice. His hand stops stimulating the nub but you still have to hold yourself back from grinding against the pad of his callused digit. With a shaky hand, you free his cock from the confines of his pants. At your hesitant touch, you can feel it twitch in your palm. The throbbing heat is dizzying. His grip on your hips tightens for a fraction as you line up the tip with your entrance.

Biting your lip, you lower your hips and let him penetrate you.

He says your name, concern lacing the word. “While I appreciate your attempt to be assertive, you are going to hurt yourself…”

“It’s—hnn… not a problem…” You sink down a few more centimeters onto his shaft. Despite your dismissal, a pained keening noise leaves your throat. How were you able to take him the first time?

“My love, you’re too tight.” Capitano’s palm caresses the side of your face, as if attempting to soothe the crease on your features. Risking a glance at him, you note that he almost looks unfazed at the feeling of your attempts to fit him. “You need to relax…”

If he was so concerned, then why was he—your breath hitches as you feel him grow harder.

His palms return to your sides, fingers pressing lightly into your waist and keeping you from taking more of his cock. Your knees are trembling and you don’t need to look to see that you were only able to fit less than half of its length. But even then, you can feel your entrance already stretching to its limits to accommodate its girth. You feel tears springing to the corners of your eyes.

This was embarrassing, no, more embarrassing than that, your cunt continued to traitorously leak in spite of the overwhelming stimulation.

He presses his forehead against yours. With this proximity, you can feel his breath fan across your lips. “You’re rushing again…slow down…” He is going to leave bruises along your waist. Despite his level-headed voice, you know he’s almost at his limit. You brace a hand against his shoulder. Taking a deep breath, you try again—

So what if it hurts? Just start feeling good already, you’re about to say. But all that leaves your throat is a small whine. “K…kiss me, plea—” Capitano’s lips meet yours, eliciting a soft moan. He doesn’t stop there, his hands reach up to stroke your nipples, sending more sparks of pleasure through your chest. The added stimulation makes your hips buck, shallowly fucking yourself on his cock. Taking more and more until he bottoms out.

The fullness of his length inside you combined with the sight of your joined hips stirs more heat. “Does…it feel good?” you ask, after pulling apart. You bring yourself to glance at his face and feel your pulse come to a standstill.

The look in his eyes—dark with lust, fully and absolutely captivated—captures you. “Yes.” Every breath he takes is measured, the only thing he can do to keep his self-control from snapping. “You feel absolutely divine, my beloved flower.”

How did praise come so easily to him? You feel your cheeks flush. “But I haven’t… started moving yet…”

Capitano’s hand brushes against your lower stomach, before pressing down. Even without exerting that much force, a strangled moan escapes your throat. Your cunt spasms at the sensation. “And yet, you’re tightening around me like a vice…”

Your nails dig into the skin of his shoulder as he lightly pinches and rolls your nipples in between his fingers. Capitano’s words continue, filling your head with him. “...trying to pull me deeper—mm!”

You surge forward and pull him into a deep kiss, swallowing the rest of his words. You run your fingers through his hair, smoothing out the tangles and savoring the silk-like texture against your skin. The painful sensation of trying to fit him has completely dissipated. Uninhibited, you grind against him, and in turn, he meets every cant of your hips. Every brush of his cock against your folds pulls moans and gasps from you, messing up your rhythm.

Starved of air, you break apart to catch your breath. Your legs buckle, no longer able to hold up your weight. But it does little to hinder Capitano’s own need for pleasure, he bounces you on his lap and continues to drive his cock in and out of your cunt. With each thrust, it almost feels as if he was reaching deeper and deeper into you, pushing into your womb.

Your release comes hard and fast, making you seize up and clench down on him. Capitano’s pace grows erratic, you feel his length twitch before spilling his come inside you.

Suddenly, your back meets the mattress of the bed. Your legs twitch as he pulls out, letting his seed drip from your cunt.

Your eyes catch that his erection hasn’t flagged. Another jolt seizes you as his cock rubs against your entrance, lightly spreading your folds and smearing the clear arousal. “A-aren’t you done?” You still haven’t caught your breath, you don’t know if you’re able to take even more—

“I’m afraid I haven’t had my fill yet.” Capitano leans closer to you, bracketing you in his arms. His hair falling past his shoulders comes down like a curtain, seemingly closing you off from the rest of the world. You can only see his expression, pupils dilated with pleasure and ragged breaths pouring from his lips. If looks could kill, it would have been death at first sight for you. “Would you allow me to indulge myself, my darling?”

You wrap your shaking arms around his neck, pull him closer to you and bury your face into the crook of his neck. Let him enter you for a second time.

How many deaths would that make this?

You realize that the trembling of your frame isn’t born from fear, but rather anticipation for what he would do.

So when did you learn to meet his gaze unflinchingly?

[...]

The hot water is a godsend, especially in a land of perpetual winter like Snezhnaya. The heat seeps into your frame. It will do wonders for the impending soreness after you get out of the tub. You can also chalk up the flush in your cheeks to the temperature, and not because of Capitano’s inhuman stamina, not because of his continued insistence on pleasuring you as well, and definitely not because of the way he almost brought you to another climax as he cleaned you up before helping you into the tub.

One of your hands wipes at your face in an attempt to dispel the building fluster. He was going to have to carry you around again. You sink and let the water come up to cover your shoulders, drawing your knees up to your chest and idly stare at the slowing ripples of the water.

“Don’t fall asleep in the bath.” Capitano’s voice brings you out of your thoughts. He closes the door behind him. “You’ll overheat.”

Straightening up, you protest. “I’m—urk—awake!” You wince at the roughness of your voice, bringing up a hand to rub at your throat.

“Good.” His expression gives way to concern. “I’ll prepare some tea for you.”

“N-no, you don’t need to.” The effort it takes to speak at a normal volume is too much, you elect to whisper instead. You shake your head and reach out for him. At the light brush of your fingertips against his wrist, Capitano’s hand envelops yours. “Will you join me?”

“Let me clean myself first, I’ll be with you.” He promises with a press of his lips against the crown of your head.

You stare furtively at his back as he moves to the shower. Count the minutes until the sound of running water stops. When he steps out, he meets your gaze, catches you staring at his well-endowed form, the droplets of water running down the lines of muscle—

Embarrassed, you duck your gaze and scoot over to make space for him in the tub. The water level rises at the presence of another person.

“May I?” Capitano’s hands hover short of making contact with your shoulders.

“...mhm.” You make a soft noise of assent, lightly flinching at the weight of his touch against your bare skin. His thumbs rub soothing circles into you, your eyes flutter shut and you lean against him. The steady thump of his heartbeat is comforting.

…It almost feels like home in his arms.

A/N: this one's for u bestie @jessamine-rose, MERRY CHRISMISS! thank you for infecting me with brainworms by osmosis (derogatory) and ty also for beta'ing this fic haha i was dying at the romantic-y chivalrous character of capitano had fun writing capitano's darling and subjecting her to his wholehearted love and devotion

to the rest of my readers, you should deffo follow her!! she's got some divine yandere fatui longfics to peruse and a bunch of heart-pinching hcs/imagines, i guarantee yall are in for a treat!! i hope you liked reading this! dont be afraid to reblog and yell in the tags or yell abt my writing in my askbox!!🥰🥰

#mdni #the capitano agenda #genshin impact #il capitano #yandere capitano x reader #fem!reader #dellet-writings

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