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hanazuma-inactive · 3 years

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defrost (nsfw) kaeya x top!male reader

pronouns: he/him

warnings: ice play!! slight degradation, orgasm denial/ edging, top male reader, bottom kaeya

a/n: this was edited by @kamihara, she really outdone herself in this one, professional kaeya simp lol

_____

“to think such an honourable knight such as you, the cavalry captain of mondstat, is now begging to cum. how shameful of you,” you let out a low chuckle as a provocative smile broke out on your lips, “i wonder what citizens would say if they saw their beloved and oh so admirable kaeya in this position?”

as a captain of the ordo favonius, you were a bright figure to the people of mondstat. a person who aided in saving the city from destruction, one of the heroes that defeated storm terror. of course, other knights had nothing but respect for you as your skill and talent was nothing short of impressive. many looked at you with a high regard due to your strength and position, this meant that many were intimidated by your presence and therefore fear approaching you.

however, there was one person who disregarded this and stuck by you anyways, kaeya alberich, the cavalry captain. out of everyone in the knights of favonius, you were the closest with kaeya. you enjoyed his company a lot, he was an interesting person who knew how to keep a conversation going, and while you're with him you could never find yourself feeling bored. he was as charming as he was cunning.

kaeya found himself enjoying your company too. the two of you have done lots of things together. going on missions, getting away with “knighty” duty, babysitting klee, and drinking at angels share. you know, all the fun things in life.

kaeya was a secretive person, and while you were curious about him, you respected his boundaries. perhaps this was the reason why he drew you in, besides his blaringly good looks of course.

there was no doubt that the man was attractive from head to toe. his silky navy blue hair fell down his shoulder with grace, his fringe complemented his smooth, flawless sepia toned face. his periwinkle eye held the sheen of a crystal, glistening as his long eyelashes framed it with poise. the diamond shaped pupils his eyes possessed could leave you in a trance forever. his open white shirt left his cleavage on display, contrasted with the black corset around his slim, slim waist. his slender legs brought him around with confidence and charisma.additionally, the intricate accessories he wore suited his personality well. all in all, kaeya was a pretty little thing.

all of this lead up to you harbouring romantic feelings for the cavalry caption. how could you not feel anything? he was perfect in every way.

the sound of kaeya’s voice snapped you out of your thinking. “y/n, any missions today?”

“nothing for you i don’t think, i gotta help jean with the paperworks though.” you sighed at the thought of a mountain of paperwork.

“great, well i’m off then you have fun doing whatever.�� kaeya smirked at you, poking fun at your dread.

he started to turn around and walk off but you had other plans.

“wait. kaeya-” you speak quickly.

“hm?” he hummed out.

“angels share? 9pm?”

a quizzical look washed over his face before he masked it with one of his cunning smiles.

“alright.”

little did kaeya know you had more in mind than just drinking with him tonight. today would be the day when you finally told him about your little crush on him.

night quickly arrived after a day of working with jean. you were pretty exhausted but still excited about what's about to happen later tonight. when you entered the bar, Kaeya was already waiting for you at the counter talking with the bartender, charles.

“ah, i see mr.l/n is here too. Your usual today as well sir?”

“yah that’d be nice, thanks charles.” you said as you took a seat next to kaeya

“you got it.” charles said as he left to go get your drink.

angel's share was the place you and kaeya loved the most. the kind of noisy background with people chatting. cyrus and jack talking about their gains for today, six-fingered jose still playing his lyre, the song was getting a little old but you didn’t mind, in fact if he changed the song you probably wouldn’t be used to it.

“so, what’s the special occasion for today? you usually don’t invite me to drink on weekdays.” kaeya said while swirling his drink and glancing over at you.

kaeya’s eyes always amazed you. you didn’t know the name of the grey-ish color but you could gaze into them forever. his smooth skin glowed under the dim lighting in the bar. you loved everything about the man, his dark blue hair, his perfectly shaped body, and the fact that you could see a little bit of his clothing. what kaeya said on the first day when you guys met was true, you did feel something for him.

“hm? can i not invite fellow knights to share a drink once in while without a special occasion.”

“well, not wrong there but…you seem like you have ulterior motives for tonight from the way you’re dressing.” kaeya said, smirking at you.

it was true, you purposely chose one of your best outfits today for kaeya, you wanted to impress the man not only from your combat skills, but also your looks. there was no secret you could hide from kaeya. he knew you too well and he always looked right through you. it could have just been kaeya’s observant nature but you like to hope it was something more than that.

“you’re right there, you really do know me too well, maybe i need to start hiding things from you a little huh?”

“you can try but i highly doubt it’ll work in your favour, mr.honorary knight.”

both of you looked at each other with a slight smirk as charles arrived with your drink. after drinking for a good while you could tell kaeya was getting a little tipsy. his movements were unstable, he shaked a little while walking and his eyes started to become hazy. what better time than right now to reveal your true plans for tonight, you were gonna fuck the shit out of the beautiful man. you wanted to hear him scream your name in pleasure as you break him, over and over again.

“why don’t we go somewhere else? y’know, somewhere more, quiet” you suggested while scooting closer to kaeya.

“i wouldn’t mind that.”

as soon as you heard those words you immediately got up and left with kaeya. your plan was going perfectly and the best part is about to come soon. kaeya wasn’t stupid, he was an adult afterall and he knew what you were trying to do. dressing up all sexy like that, getting drinks, going somewhere more “private”, what else could it have been.

the two of you arrived in your house and headed straight for your bedroom. kaeya has been to your house many times for many reasons and he knew where everything was so he didn’t trip or fall.

you placed a light kiss on kaeya’s lips while he laid on your bed.

“wait here~ i’ll be right back.”

this was where things would get, interesting

you opened your fridge to grab a small wooden bowl. the content inside was covered by a small white cloth. after grabbing that you went to grab some rope from a drawer you hid them in because you didn’t know what to say if someone saw those items in your house.

after bringing the items back you put them on the side and pushed kaeya down.

“what’re those?” he asked

(its a surprise tool that’ll help us later.)

“don’t worry about it sweetheart, just lay back and let me do the work alright?”

you brought a blush to kaeya’s face with your flirty words as he gave you a small nod, signalling you consent and approval. you kept invading kaeya’s mouth over and over again, you’re tongue so skillful kaeya was sure this definitely wasn’t your first time. the kisses ended after a while leaving both of you panting and a half an erection in your pants. wanting more, you began to take off kaeya’s uniform. his skin is so beautiful, you could also see his well defined body, just the perfect amount, not too buff, not too skinny. you licked your lips a little bit and looked up at kaeya with a smirk. when you put your mouth onto kaeya’s pink nipples, he squealed a little out of surprise but soft moans soon began to escape from his mouth.

“a-ah~ didn’t know you had this in you, honorary knight.”

“oh i know a lot more tricks that can make you feel good~” you teased.

as you continued to suck on kaeya’s smooth skin, you decided to spice things up a little bit. kaeya yelped as he felt a slight pain around his nipples. you remove your mouth to see a bite mark around it.

“to mark you as mine~”

“tch, you cocky little bastard.”

seeing the tent building up in kaeya’s pants, you decided to take them off and grant it some release. after you took off kaeya’s jeans you saw a small stain at the top of his boxers, showing that he felt good earlier.

“alright... this is where the fun part begins.” you said as you grabbed the ropes you initially put on the floor.

“restraining me? go ahead, let’s see if the honorary knight is all talk or he actually has something up his sleeve.” kaeya taunted

not liking his attitude, you forcefully tied kaeya’s hands behind his back and pushed him to the end of the bed facing you with nothing on but his boxers. now, the mighty kaeya alberich, is at your mercy.

“alright, we can do this in two ways. one, you listen to me, second, i don’t think you’ll like what’ll happen,”

kaeya raised his head a little and looked you dead in the eyes.

“i choose the second option”

you knew kaeya was the bratty type and it’ll only add to the fun to tame him. after hearing his choice you pushed kaeya back to where he was before and uncovered the bowl you had prepared earlier on the side. the bow was filled with medium sized ice cubes and it was till now that kaeya finally realized what you were trying to do.

“ice cubes huh? bring it on.”

“you asked for it~”

you grabbed one of the ice cubes and started to rub it on kaeya’s pecs, making circular motions and slowing moving towards the center where his nipples are.

“f-fuck that’s cold.”

you saw kaeya’s cock twitch a little when you first reached his nipples and you knew he was feeling good. moving on with your plan, you rested the ice cube on kaeya’s nipples and lifted his boxers where his cock is still covered but his asshole is exposed to you. right after that, you grabbed the lube that has been sitting in your nightstand and spread them on your fingers. without mercy you put 2 fingers into kaeya, trying to find his pleasure spot. sooner or later when kaeya started to let out tiny moans you knew you hit your target.

“feels good huh baby boy~”

“y-yah, and so what o-oh fuck~”

kaeya was sure feeling it, to a point where he started stuttering.

the constant teasing got kaeya close to his limit. he couldn’t hold it any longer. but you’re not gonna let him cum that easy are you? of course not, he needed to be punished for what he did earlier.

“a-ah y/n i’m gonna cum i’m gonna cum so hard- wait why'd you s-stop?” kaeya asked

“you decided to be a brat earlier didn’t you~? bad boys get punishment.” you said with a smirk on your face.

kaeya stayed silent, not a word coming out of his mouth, head hung low feeling embarrassed.

“maybe~ if you begged a little i might reconsider, don’t you think so, pretty boy?”

kaeya finally lost his composure at this point, all he wanted was to cum from your touch.

“fine... i don’t care anymore.” kaeya growled.

“p-please y/n.” kaeya looked up at you with pleading eyes. “i want to c-cum, i want to cum so bad. i should’ve been a good boy from the beginning… i promise i’ll be obedient from now on, j-just please, let me cum…” kaeya begged

“that’s what i thought.”

satisfied with kaeya’s begging, you decided to grant him his release. you added another ice cube to the other side of kaeya’s chest while stroking his dick through his boxers. of course you didn’t forget to keep teasing kaeya’s prostate while you were at it. all these different stimulations made kaeya lose his mind. the male came through his boxers all over the place. semen spilled on his own stomach and chest followed with moans so loud the entire mondstat could hear him.

after he settled himself down a little, kaeya waited for you to untie him. you exchanged a kiss with him while you were doing so, smiling at each other thinking about what just happened. neither of you cared about the mess that you made because you guys were tired. listening to the birds chirp, you fell asleep with the dark blue haired male on your bed.

the two of you woke up in the afternoon to the noises of mondstat. you woke up a little before kaeya and from your point of view he was literally a sleeping beauty. you stroked his hair a little bit, causing him to wake up.

"y/n…good morning handsome."

"right back at you."

both of you giggled a little while holding hands.

"hey kaeya?"

"yes y/n."

"i've been meaning to get this off my chest and i don't think there will be a better time to say it than now."

"well go ahead, i'm all ears."

"you were the only one that ever stuck with me in the knights, everyone was afraid of me due to my strength except for you. you listened to me, you talked to me, and if it weren't for you i probably would've quit the job at the knights already." you took a deep breath and let out the words kaeya were waiting for.

"kaeya alberich... will you he my boyfriend?"

kaeya gave you a small scoff as a reaction and a light kiss to your lips.

"what reason do i have to refuse such a perfect man?."

#genshin impact #genshin fic #genshin impact fic #genshin x reader #genshin x male reader #genshin x m!reader #genshin smut #genshin x male reader smut #genshin x top m!reader #genshin x top male reader #kaeya #kaeya alberich #kaeya x reader #kaeya x male reader #kaeya x reader smut #kaeya x male reader smut #kaeya x m!reader smut #kaeya x top!male reader #kaeya x top male reader

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tonguetiedraven · 2 years

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Fake dating BonRin? 😍❤️

This one is going to be a multiparter, because I've had an idea for a fake dating au for a while, and I can't seem to ever make a short story, lol. So here's the first part, which is mostly just set up ;)

Thanks for the ask! I hope that you enjoy the story <3

Caprizant

Part: one (you're here), two

— — — — —

“Ah,” Lewin lifted his head from the papers he was pretending to grade as they walked in the room. Which seemed strange, because Rin had heard Ryuuji gripe a lot about grading papers for Lewin, so he didn’t think Lewin actually graded anything. To hear Ryuuji tell it, Lewin just slapped a random grade on any paper Ryuuji didn’t go over. Ryuuji was the one that gave them their grades. He was more generous than most of Rin’s teachers, so he had no real complaints.

“Yes, sir?” Ryuuji asked politely at the same time Rin asked “What’s up?” He couldn’t manage polite around Lewin. The stink he put off always gave Rin an immediate headache, and the chapstick he’d rubbed under his nose could only block so much of it.

Lewin grinned in his toothy, kind of aggressive way. “How do you guys feel about doing a mission together?”

Rin’s gaze darted to Ryuuji, who thankfully also looked confused. This entire thing seemed a bit weird. They didn’t get asked about missions, they were assigned to them, and they’d done pretty much all of them together. Rin could only think of two or three times Ryuuji hadn’t been around, and most of those Rin wasn’t even supposed to be on. He’d just snuck after his twin.

Ryuuji answered before Rin could figure out how to answer the weird question. “Fine, sir? We’ve worked together before.”

Lewin barked out a quick and loud laugh. “Not like this.”

Rin gave Ryuuji another glance and was happy he looked just as concerned as he felt about that answer. Lewin’s excitement almost always ended in trouble for them.

“Not like what?”

Lewin motioned towards the desks in front of his own. “Sit down. This is gonna take a while.” Lewin waited until they were sitting before he continued. “Over the last month and a half, we’ve gotten fifty different complaints from students about a masked figure attacking them at night.”

“What?!” That was so many! That was at least one attack a day. How had they not heard about this?

“Yeah? Why ya sound so surprised? Crazy stuff happens on this campus all the time.”

“Excuse me, sir,” Ryuuji interrupted, looking irritated, “we might have a high level of demonic activity, but students aren’t typically accosted by masked figures.”

Yeah! This was a rich kid’s school. No one really knew about the Exorcist part. Wealthy people wouldn’t keep sending their kids here if they got hurt regularly.

Light shrugged like it didn’t really matter one way or the other to him. “The masked figure is tall, possibly taller than a human according to some of our witnesses, and thin. Despite its gangly appearance, it’s apparently capable of throwing a person through the air.”

How had they not heard about this? Who had gotten flung? That was terrifying.

“Do you know what kind of demon it is?” Ryuuji asked. He'd already filled half a page with notes, and Rin hadn't even noticed him pull out the notebook.

Light held up his hand to stop him. “I’m getting to that. Just hold on. Always gotta be so curious.” There was no bite in his tone. If anything, he looked fond. “The students being attacked were all in pairs. Groups of two only. Never any bigger than that. And specifically same sex pairs.”

Rin couldn’t help but notice that Ryuuji’s cheeks went a little pink. Had he missed something?

“They were all by themselves, and it was always late. In each case, one of them was laughing.”

This seemed like a weirdly specific list for a demon, but then again, most of the demons he’d met were pretty dang specific about what they liked.

“Sir,” Ryuuji interjected quickly, and yeah, there was no mistaking the blush on his cheeks, “what is it you’re wanting us to do?”

Light smiled, and it was far more frightening than it had any right to be. “Isn’t it obvious? You two are gonna date and get the Hannya’s attention.”

“Hannye?” Rin asked as Ryuuji spluttered out: “date?!”

“Yeah, date. Fake date. You know, undercover? And Hannya. A demon that feeds off of jealousy and creates it in others. You two are going to be a fake couple, attract the demon’s attention, and take it down. We’re not sure if it’s on its own, or if it’s being controlled by someone, so you can’t just randomly walk around the campus and hope it finds you.” He eyed them both. “The fake couple thing isn’t negotiable, so if you two say no, I’m asking Kamiki and Moriyama.”

Hell no! He wasn’t letting his friends be in danger. Not while he could stop it.

“I’m game,” he declared hotly.

“Uh, of course we’ll do it. Just…” Ryuuji swallowed and stared at the chalk board. “Everyone? Even our friends?”

Rin could feel his tail physically droop as a wave of shame hit him. He didn’t mind everyone thinking he was dating Ryuuji — why would he mind when Ryuuji was such a catch? — but that didn’t mean Ryuuji didn’t have a reputation as a hard-working and goal-oriented student who didn’t date. He was already hounded by other people’s unwanted affections everyday. Would it get worse if they thought he was actually open to dating people?

And Ryuuji might not be bi like him. Ryuuji might not even swing any way. Rin couldn’t really tell. He’d been shot down ages ago, and honestly, he’d just been giddy to have even one friendship at that time, so he just hadn’t pursued anything more because Ryuuji's friendship wasn't a thing he was game to risk.

Ryuuji also hated lying, and it wasn’t like Rin was all that much of a catch. He had cooking, and really, that was it. His unavoidable link to Satan more than canceled out any positives he might have with his cooking.

If everyone thought they were dating, that would kind of have to include their friends. Rin was fine with that, but that didn’t mean Ryuuji would be. Explaining afterwards would be messy too, unless they just pretended to break up?

“Yep,” Light drawled. “Unless you’re sure it’s not something the Illuminati are doing that Shima’s helping with.” Ryuuji immediately scowled and Light nodded like that finished the conversation for him. “Good. Then I’ll let you two go. I’ll text you a map of the campus with the most hit spots. You two go on a date or something in the mean time.” He motioned for the door, and the dismissal was obvious. Rin got up and left the room, far more confused than when he’d arrived.

Apparently he had a boyfriend now.

#bonrin #aoex #blue exorcist #my tumblr fics #rin okumura #ryuji suguro #ryuuji suguro #bon suguro #bonfire #bonxrin #sugurorin #ao no exorcist #fake dating #just an introduction to the story #but I've got most of it plotted #and i almost never plot things #lol

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sup-hoes-its-me · 3 years

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Skinny Love (Kakashi x Reader)

A/N: hello again. I'm in love with Kakashi this mans makes me heart go wild I swear. Hope you like seeing him on ur dash lol. Shy reader who is too afraid to confess how she feels to Kakashi. This is only part one and is essentially just fluff. The second part will be all angst and sadness so beware.

Ps. It took me so long to get this one done. I was struggling to find the right words.

Word count: 4000

"Come on, sensei. You like him," Sakura laughed, poking her superior in the arm. The group of women stood outside the training grounds after a day of hanging out and working on their jutsu. On occasion Y/N enjoyed taking the girls out and spending time with them. It was a relief to be away from all that testosterone. If only for a short time.

She just shook her head, smothering down the embarrassment she felt creeping up her neck. Her stomach churned whenever she recognized her feelings for the man. It was just so intense. "I would never feel that way about a coworker, you know that, Sakura."

"But he's not just a coworker to you, is he? He's also your close friend," Ino hummed.

"Perhaps, but haven't I taught you that it's bad to let emotions get in the way of work?"

The blond rolled her eyes, turning to fully face one of her sensei, who she would argue was deeply in denial. "Seriously why does it even matter? Kurenai-sensei and Asuma-sensei literally had a baby together. You should definitely tell Kakashi you like him."

Y/N tossed her head back against the wall, sighing. "Girls, I really don't like him. He's just my friend. He's nice to me and I appreciate that, but that doesn't mean I want to date him or anything." Her voice shook and clearly she had been caught.

She was always so bad at lying.

"Whatever you say, Y/N."

"It's just something I'd rather not dwell on, Sakura. I'm sorry for being so private about it, but it's a sensitive subject for me," the woman confessed, rubbing the back of her neck awkwardly.

"It's okay! You don't have to apologize. We get it! Feelings can definitely be complicated."

"I-I," she started, about to explain herself, but instead she rethought what she was about to say. There was no reason to actually reveal how she felt about the man. These times were tough, and there wasn't any room for making things even more messy with relationship drama. Y/N was more than happy just pretending they were friends and nothing more. As long as she had him just to talk to, she would be fine. As long as he always made it back alive, there was no reason to complain.

"You're right. Feelings are too complicated," she muttered, feeling herself practically deflate as she did so. Y/N was beginning to think she was just the one making everything complicated when it didn't have to be. Skipping around and lying about her feelings. Kakashi wouldn't ditch her if she just said something, she was sure of it.

Just as Sakura was about to reply, the voice of the man in question chimed in from down the path, "Y/N, we were looking for you."

"Yes, the third wheel to our tricycle of youth!"

Y/N felt a smile grow on her lips at the sounds of those voices, especially Gai's exclamation of youth. He was awfully weird, she thought, but that was what kept him so interesting. She turned to face the men walking in her direction. "Kakashi, Gai! What's up? The girls and I were just finishing our training."

"We're going out for drinks and thought you might like to join."

"Sounds great. It's been a long time since the three of us went out. For some reason we never have off at the same time anymore."

"Yeah, it's a shame. Missions have taken over our lives lately," Kakashi said tiredly. It was true. They really never had a second to rest. It was beginning to take its toll. Those were the consequences of war though. "How have you been?"

"Good, I, um..." she began, her eyes trailing up to Kakashi's. He watched back intently, patiently, and she felt something in her chest flutter up. He was always so handsome, she wondered how she could go so long without seeing his face. She just wanted to leap forward and give him a hug, wrap herself up in his warm arms for just a little while. That wasn't an option though, so she settled on some simple words. "I've missed you."

His eyes softened barely enough to be noticeable but she saw. Her heart continued to flutter up in her chest and she sighed, clutching her hands tighter behind her back. No doubt the girls standing just behind her were hyper-analyzing all their interactions, especially after revealing they held an interest in the pair's relationship.

He didn't have the chance to reply though, as Gai was the one to chime in. "Why thank you. I have to say, I've missed you as well, my kunoichi friend."

"Thanks, Gai." Even if the statement wasn't exactly pointed toward him, she was happy she had been missed.

"No problem! Now I hope you young ladies don't mind if we take L/N off your hands."

"No no. It's not a problem, Gai-sensei. I'm sure our moms want us home for dinner anyway. It's getting late after all."

"Yeah, we'll see you later, Y/N-sensei." The pink haired girl waved ss they started to make their way in the opposite direction toward town. Ino paused for a moment though.

"Don't forget what we talked about. You really shouldn't be so shy; it's gonna be okay," she said softly. Y/N sighed, nodding her head as if to say fine. In reality, she wouldn't do anything different. She wasn't feeling very open to changing herself or facing any of her fears. "See you around."

It was kinda sad that Y/N found comfort and support in a bunch of 15 year olds. She was an adult, couldn't she talk to other adults about her problems. These girls were just so accepting and she didn't feel awkward talking about immature things like crushes. Any other adult would just be too wrapped up in their own lives to care too much anyway.

"What was that about?"

"Nothing, Kakashi. We were just talking about random stuff. You know how curious they can be."

"You go out there and fight rogue shinobi every week. How could you be shy?" The green beast asked.

"It's really nothing. They're always assuming things about me. I'm reserved, but I wouldn't say I'm shy, per se…" She stopped to think for a quick second, tapping her foot on the ground. "Actually, I would say I'm just more conscious of the things I say and do than most other people. Not a bad thing at all."

Kakashi nodded. "It's good to keep a level head."

"Exactly. I'm Level headed. Thanks, Kakashi."

"Now let's head off to the bar! Sake for everyone!" Gai cheered, throwing his fist up in the air. She nodded, walking up beside the pair as they started off toward the restaurant of their choice, which she hoped was her favorite one with the tastiest fruit juice drinks. She was willing to put out good money to have one good, tispy night of drinks and snacking. It had already been weeks since she had a night off, one time wouldn't break the bank.

She stood to the right of them, just beside Kakashi. Every now and then she found herself drifting just a bit too close to him, her natural gait leaning toward the left. At one point, she found her hand skim dangerously close to his and she snatched it away to keep herself in check. Holding his hand perhaps was a dream of hers but she wasn't going to actually try anything.

It wasn't that she was afraid of Kakashi. Quite the opposite actually. She cared for him so deeply it sometimes made her stomach churn when she thought about it. He was her friend for ages, ever since she could really remember. He was one of the only people she could sit with and feel completely enveloped in a warm comfort, free of judgement and deceit. Gai as well, but Kakashi was different.

Maybe he could be a bit of pervert, and even sarcastic at times, but he was never rude. He had changed over the years from being a know-it-all, little jerk to someone everyone liked and admired, a kind and brave soul.

Unfortunately, it took bouts of death and loss to come about this change, but she wasn't going to ignore it. He was the best man she knew, and it only seemed natural she fell in love with him. He would probably never feel the same way. He had better things to worry about and other women to long for. He didn't have his entire life to wait around for a shy woman like herself. That was okay.

As long as he was alive and well, she would be happy.

Maybe one day she would gather the courage to grab his hand, to run her thumb over his knuckles and feel the callouses against her skin. Maybe one day she would have the courage to confess how she felt. Not now, but one day when she was comfortable.

"You okay?" He asked, pulling her out of her deepening thoughts. "You're walking really slow and uh, your hand…" The man motioned to where she was clutching her wrist against her chest.

"Yes, I'm fine. Just uh, my wrist is sore from training." She worked her hand in a circle, pretending to stretch it out. He rolled his visible eye, knowingly.

"Sure. Always skipping around the real issues."

"I'm really okay. I was just thinking hard about something."

"Anything to do with what you, Sakura, and Ino were talking about?" he suggested, raising a brow.

She groaned. He always knew what she was thinking. It was definitely one of his best and worst qualities depending on the situation. In this case, she felt awkward as she was so lost in thought about him. She felt like a fool. "Maybe it was. But that was girl time and now it's drinking time. Different topics of discussion."

"Well, mind telling me what's got you so caught up? It's gotta be important."

"It's personal."

"Ah, I see. Well, that's fine. When you want to talk about it, I'm always around."

There was silence for a moment, her thoughts running wild in her head. He was so kind, it wouldn't be bad to tell him how she felt. He would let her down easy, surely. And Gai would be there to cushion her embarrassment, no doubt. He would make things less awkward somehow. She was sure of it.

It was crazy. No way she would say anything. Definitely not.

"I'm interested in someone," Y/N found herself blurting out before she could stop herself. She just felt so much pressure building up in her chest and the only way she could relieve that feeling was to tell him something, anything about the predicament she was in. She wouldn't tell him exactly how she felt and about who, but she could vent.

Damn, all this and she didn't even have her first drink. That man really did something to her.

The men stopped in their path, their heads turning their attention solely to her. She felt her neck and cheeks begin to heat up and her palms start to sweat. Why would she say that? Dammit. She really was a fool.

"Really? Who?" Gai asked. "He'd be a fool to reject you, of course, beautiful flower of the leaf! You do not have to worry!"

"Gai...it's really not that simple. He is, um, out of my league, I guess you could say," she muttered nervously, rubbing her palms together to ease her anxiety. "He's just well, I don't know, the perfect guy ever."

She could feel Kakashi tense at her side, and her eyes scanned over him. He didn't look out of the ordinary but his energy had definitely changed. Strange.

"No one is out of your league, don't you dare say something like that! If he doesn't let you down easy, I will use my fists of justice to defend you! Tell me who this mystery man is."

"This is what Ino meant when she said you were being shy. You aren't going to tell him, are you?" Kakashi asked, and she noticed the bit of annoyance in his tone. She wondered if he was just upset she was talking about such silly things when they were ready to start drinking. She felt embarrassed. They were adults. Adults don't talk about this kind of thing. He doesn't want to hear about the guys she's interested in, or how she feels about them. Maybe Gai would be interested in it, but not a cool guy like Kakashi.

"Of course not. Like I said, he would just reject me anyway, there's no point," she told them. "And Gai, I can't just tell you who it is. You know you're a loud mouth; you'd go around telling everyone." She really didn't believe Gai would do that to her. He was far too conscious of others feelings for the most part. She just couldn't risk Kakashi knowing. She would keep it a secret from him.

"Oh come on! Just tell us! I'll help you out, be your wingman!"

"Maybe I'll tell you another time. When I'm more confident in myself."

"Well, what is it that has finally caught out dear friends heart in a web of love? Tell us!" Oh man. He really was nosy sometimes. He meant well, but occasionally he just didn't know when to stop. Kakashi kept his mouth shut because he understood she was getting uncomfortable, that or he was growing annoyed as she suspected.

Regardless, it was nice to get some of this off her chest, even if it was risky business.

"I don't really know. He's smart and considerate, and very brave. He's handsome as well, that's a plus," she smiled, listing off the things she liked about the man standing right in front of her. It felt so exhilarating, talking about her feeling so openly. It was terrifying and relieving at the same time. Y/N exhaled as she thought about him again, "He just makes me feel happy when I'm in my worst moments, that's all. I mean, what else could I ask for?"

"I see! He sounds like a good guy. Can't wait to meet him," he laughed until his eyes widened and he leaned in a bit closer to her face. He pointed his finger at his chest and questioned, "Unless of course, I already know him. It's not me, is it?

She found herself smiling just a little, her lips curving up at the absurdity of it all. "No definitely not. You don't have to worry about that."

"I'm wounded, but I understand. My youthfulness is just too strong for you."

As she thought of something to say, she began to question just why Kakashi hadn't said anything really at all. It was strange of him, letting the other man do all the talking when normally he asked her questions and at least tried to engage. Maybe he was feeling tired or bored with the conversation. She had to change the subject.

"So uh, let's get a move on before all the good booths are taken, yeah?"

"Actually, I'm getting tired. I think I'll just head home for the night, get ready for my mission in two days," the white haired jounin sighed. They both looked over to him, surprised, but Y/N knew why he needed to go. She had upset him somehow. So much for a fun night between the three of them.

"Kakashi, come on! Don't bail on us now!"

She took a step back and her eyes trailed up to his, which were narrowed, not angrily just as if he had been hurt or confused she couldn't tell which. "Oh, are you sure?" Her heart was sinking in her chest seeing him so conflicted.

"Yeah. Got a headache, too."

"Ah, okay. Well, I'll see you around sometime?"

"Yeah."

"Goodbye, rival. Hopefully you are feeling better tomorrow and we can have a real night of drinking indeed!"

And with that, he left to his apartment, leaving the other two behind. She felt her stomach begin to turn uncomfortably, sick from the thought of Kakashi just leaving them like that. He seemed so angry, she couldn't help but think it was all her fault. It wasn't in his nature to act that way.

They had already spent so much time apart already that it was tugging at her heart strings. She felt like they rarely saw each other anymore. For him to be angry at her and leave, that meant they would just see each other even less than before. It seemed like a nightmare come true. She really did miss him, like she had said. She missed the fun they would have together and the conversations they shared. She just missed him and there he went, gone off again without so much as a real goodbye.

The woman clutched at her stomach, feeling the tossing and turning overtake her sense with nausea.

Suddenly, before she could contain herself, tears began dripping down her cheeks, and she sucked in her breath. Hot tears warmed her cheeks, and frantically she wiped them away from her cheeks. Her arms wound around her waist and she hugged herself tightly inward, almost as if she would turn into a ball if she could.

"Y/N, what's wrong?! What happened?"

"It's Kakashi," she whispered, trying to keep herself from crying anymore but it only got worse.

"Kakashi? Because he left? It's okay, we can go drinking another night or-or you and I can just go alone. No problems," he tried to say but it wasn't going to work. She didn't want to go to dinner with Gai and she didn't want to wait until tomorrow, or whatever the next time they would all be together. She was being stupid and selfish, acting like a spoiled little baby with all this crying. She just couldn't stop herself.

"It's not that. There's something I haven't told anyone. I don't know what to do."

"It's gonna be fine whatever it is. Just calm down."

"No, I can't. It's so bad, Gai. I'm in love with him, it's him, and now he's mad at me and I don't know what I did wrong," she confessed, feeling all the words slipping out so easily. How is it that such strong emotions could just cause her to think so irrationally and just let something like this happen? A bout of confessing every feeling she had to her friend who may or may not go and relay all this information to Kakashi. It was stupid. She was just being stupid and reckless.

He nodded carefully, moving to take ahold of her shoulders to steady her. "It's gonna be okay. He's not mad at you, I promise. I know Kakashi and I'm sure he really was just feeling sick."

"Gai, I just...I don't want him to ever leave me, even over something stupid like this."

"Trust me, you don't have to worry about Kakashi leaving you. He would never do something like that. You are one of his closest friends. There's almost nothing you could do to make him do that, especially if you always have good intent at heart. Trust me, you really don't ever need to worry," Gai explained trying his best to reason with her. "You two do everything together. He never stops talking about you! He would never let you go."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I am one hundred percent sure!"

"I-I need to go find him. I need to make sure he's not upset with me," she said as she pushed herself away from him. He waved to her as she started in the direction of Kakashi's apartment.

"Goodluck on your mission, Y/N, not that you'll need it."

______

Kakashi was just about to enter his apartment when she dashed up the stairs and turned the corner, going so fast she nearly slid into the wall. His eyes widened when he saw her, and he froze in his spot, not turning the key to the door just yet. Her face was flush and chest heaved. He could tell she rushed on her way.

"Y/N, did you run all the way here?"

She stood, catching her breath after just having run all the way across town to find him. Her heart raced as she looked up at him, and she clutched at the railing of the stairs for support. "I wanted to say sorry for whatever I said to make you angry with me. I didn't know I was being insensitive."

"I told you I was sick," he replied, but she knew better. And he knew she did. He wasn't dumb. They knew each other better than that and there was no pretending.

"I could tell that was a lie. I know you were angry and I felt terrible."

"Were you just crying?"

She exclaimed back, holding a hand over her heart to maybe try and ease the racing heartbeat, "Maybe. What about it?! I was hurt that I'd offended my friend, isn't that tear-worthy?" She took a few more deep breaths through her mouth, letting the air fill her up and calm her down. "Why were you so upset?"

"It's not important."

"No, no. It's important to me!"

The man paused, thinking over his next words carefully. He very well knew the real reason he ran away from their conversation like a coward. He actually thought it was obvious. It wouldn't hurt for her to know. He sighed, "If you really want to know. It's because I was tired of hearing about your love life. It's not exactly an entertaining subject."

She knew it but admittedly she would be lying if she said she didn't feel her heart break a little at those words. He didn't care about her feelings enough to just sit there and listen to her talk for a couple minutes? Was she that annoying? So many thoughts ran through her head, and each one made her sad. "I just didn't want to go a whole night with Gai talking about it," he added. "It's nothing to do with you."

"I'm sorry. I really shouldn't have brought it up."

"It's fine," he brushed off her apology. "I'm the one who asked about it in the first place."

"Why- why wouldn't you want to hear me talk about other men? Why would that be a sore subject for you?" She asked, her curiosity spiking up through the roof. It was strange, the whole situation. He had never backed down from a personal chat before, only this time.

He felt like a deer caught in the headlights suddenly. How was he supposed to reply to that without blowing his cover. "I just don't like the whole romance thing."

But they both knew that was a lie. He read romance for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. But if he wanted to keep his secrets, she would let him. There was no need to pry. She just hoped he would trust her enough in the future to explain what he meant. Secretly, she wished that it was because he was jealous. That he didn't want to hear about another man because he wanted to be that guy, her lover. It was a wild thought, a hopeless theory meant to be thrown out, but she could fantasize.

"Kakashi, we're still good? As friends and all? You'll go out with me and Gai another time then?"

He nodded, his lips quirking up into just a tiny smile. It was characteristic for her mind to go straight to the worst case scenario. He replied, "Of course. Like I said, it's not that bad. Don't worry about it."

"Okay. I'm glad. I really thought I messed up this time."

"I don't think there's anything you could do to make me hate you," he sighed, leaning his shoulder against his door frame. "The day I let you go is the day I die, Y/N."

She smiled, closing her eyes and finally taking a relaxed breath. It was done. He wasn't angry at all. He still cared for her and everything else she could hope for. As long as they could remain friends, it was all gonna be okay. She laughed, "That's what Gai said. Should have listened to him, huh?"

The both nodded and suddenly they were enveloped in a peaceful silence for a while. She stared down at her feet and he watched her quietly, admiring the way she could be so miserably shy yet so adorable at the same time.

"Do you wanna go catch dinner? Or uh, just drinks like we originally planned, if you want," he asked, running his hand through his hair. Her eyes brightened at the question, and he'd be stupid not to notice the new shine in them.

"Do you want to go find Gai first?"

"Actually, how about it just be you and me this time? We'll catch Gai tomorrow morning for breakfast instead."

"Two meals in two days...I'm not made of money."

"It's on me. Don't worry about it."

"Oh, jeez. So nice of you, Kakashi. Thank you! Where are we going?" she asked happily, walking up to him and rolling back in the balls of her feet.

"Wherever you want to go."

"I feel like I'm getting the special treatment. I'm so excited," she cheered, pulling him in the direction of the stairs by the edge of his sleeve.

He just smiled. It was all he could do. He had the most beautiful woman in the entire world in front of him ready to go on a not-exactly date. They were only friends, and she reaffirmed that today when she mentioned she was interested in someone else.

But for now he could pretend they were a thing. That they were dating and that she loved him and he could openly love her back. He would take her out to dinner and kick at her ankles under the table just to annoy her. And he would take a sip of her drink and pretend it was too sweet for him and watch as she struggled to drink a sip of his liquor.

And after he walks her home that night, he would hug her tight to his chest and he would think about kissing her, to pull down his mask for just a split second and press his lips to hers, but he would refrain. It just wasn't the right time. Maybe there would never be a right time either, and that was okay.

As long as they could have nights like these, as long as he would feel her in his arms, he was more than happy. He was in love.

Part Two is up.

#kakashi x reader #kakashi imagine #kakashi hatake x reader #kakashi one shot #naruto one shot #naruto imagines #naruto x reader #writing #one shot #x reader #kakashi #naruto #kakashi hatake #naruto fanfic

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mittensmorgul · 3 years

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As Above, So Below

I’m still trying to pinpoint exactly why the focus on “heaven is fixed and actually a paradise now!” is just so deeply unsatisfying to me. And I think I need to preface this with a bit of backstory about me, because I think that gives the rest of this essay some relevant context.

I know this isn’t relevant to my main point here, but this is a metatextual and thematically identical example of the exact thing I’m gonna lay out, because context is always helpful. So please forgive this seemingly irrelevant detour, because I promise it will be relevant by the end.

(plus, would it really be an Essay By Mittens™ without at least one baffling tangent? no, it would not!)

Tangent time!

I think everyone that follows me knows how skeptical I was... or should I say how WARY I was of the way Eileen was returned to the narrative this season. We were warned in the PREVIOUS EPISODE how much Chuck was attempting to interfere in their lives. I was accused of some very nasty things, of hating the ship, or hating the character of Eileen, or of hating Sam and not wanting them to be happy. No amount of pointing at obvious warning signs in the text, no amount of yelling about Sam’s God Wound or the absolute klaxon warning that the wound had become “quiet” and his Chuck-O-Vision Nightmares had apparently stopped seemed to matter. I was declared “wrong” and told to shut up.

And then 15.09 happened, and basically everything I’d been wary of was shown to be what actually happened, but there were still unresolved issues. Eileen doubted her own feelings and walked away. She doubted what was actually real. And at the time, I said many times that I would be thrilled to see those issues resolved by the end of the season, and for her to truly know that what she’d felt growing between her and Sam was real. And by the end of the season, despite my personal horror at her previous situation (and having that personal horror compounded by the fandom literally gaslighting me and attempting to bully me into ignoring this basic actual plot detail of this specific growth process which... in the context of what my personal objection was to accepting her return at face value in the first place having been personal trauma associated with gaslighting and manipulation...) by the time 15.18 aired, I was 100% convinced that Sam and Eileen had fully chosen each other, and felt the traumatic pain Sam suffered during that text conversation with her during the snap. She NEEDED to come back, because she had been set up to be part of Sam’s Win. They were clearly each other’s future.

The show literally put in all the work to make even *me* feel this to be True and Right and Good. And then after that point we never even hear Eileen’s name again. We never were told that she was even returned at the end of 15.19. Sam, who had been so entirely devastated by her disappearance in the previous episode that he couldn’t even process it was apparently hit with an amnesia hammer and just... never even thought about her again through a long greyscale life with a blurry baby Dean factory vaguely in the background of a single scene of his life. I can’t credit or justify how after an entire year invested in making us all truly care about Sam and Eileen and the happiness they found in each other if only the cosmos would allow them to choose each other in the end would just... erase all of that in the series finale.

Which brings me to the second tangent, which is specifically about *me,* and how I feel about the cosmic order in the television show Supernatural. Because I feel a lot about it. Probably more than most people ever did. And this is also important to understanding the main underlying point I need to make here.

Something I’ve been most looking forward to, for YEARS, about Supernatural eventually ending someday was writing a book, or a thesis, or even just organizing and compiling all my observations into a cohesive narrative specifically about the cosmology of the Supernatural universe. I’ve been cobbling together my observations and realizations about the nature of heaven, hell, purgatory, the empty, the alternate universes we’ve seen, and yes, even the cosmic function of the mundane level of the story as told by events that transpired on Earth. So of everyone watching this dumb show for the last 15 years, I don’t actually know anyone who cared more that I did about finding a satisfactory resolution and transformation of every plane of existence-- the mortal world AND the “afterlife realms” we’ve experienced on this show. And in the wake of the finale, I feel cheated out of that. Because in the end, it wasn’t about the triumph of free will and a flip of the script, it was just more of the same.

And now that I have those two preliminaries out of the way, I’ll finally get to the point. :’D

(hooray, it didn’t even take 1k words to get there for once!)

The “main stage” of Supernatural has always been Earth. It’s always been “Humanity.” At the very start, we meet two men whose lives had always been dictated to them by higher powers. At first, that “higher power” was their father who raised them in his vengeance mission, who trained them to hunt the supernatural. It was the inciting incident of the entire series, after all, their realization that forces outside of their control had irrevocably altered the course of their lives. It had forever torn down what they’d trusted in family, in personal safety, and would become something they couldn’t outrun or fight back against for long before another wave of cosmic discord would settle over them once more.

We watched this story play out in ever increasing spheres of cosmic significance, until Gabriel laid it out on the table for them in the simplest possible terms (in 5.08).

GABRIEL: You do not know my family. What you guys call the apocalypse, I used to call Sunday dinner. That's why there's no stopping this, because this isn't about a war. It's about two brothers that loved each other and betrayed each other. You'd think you'd be able to relate. SAM: What are you talking about? GABRIEL: You sorry sons of bitches. Why do you think you two are the vessels? Think about it. Michael, the big brother, loyal to an absent father, and Lucifer, the little brother, rebellious of Daddy's plan. You were born to this, boys. It's your destiny! It was always you! As it is in heaven, so it must be on earth. One brother has to kill the other. DEAN: What the hell are you saying? GABRIEL: Why do you think I've always taken such an interest in you? Because from the moment Dad flipped on the lights around here, we knew it was all gonna end with you. Always. A long pause. SAM and DEAN look down, then at each other. DEAN: No. That's not gonna happen. GABRIEL: I'm sorry. But it is. GABRIEL sighs. GABRIEL: Guys. I wish this were a TV show. Easy answers, endings wrapped up in a bow...but this is real, and it's gonna end bloody for all of us. That's just how it's gotta be. ***

And isn’t that all even 1000x more painfully ironic that it all still happened even 10 years later? It was always going to end with them. And lol, “I wish this were a TV show” because if it was then it wouldn’t have to end bloody.

But this… was a Major Acknowledgement that the meta level of this story was consistent, and was telling us something important. It demonstrated that the Cosmic Structure Itself was the cause for Sam and Dean’s “destiny” in this story. But that’s not what the point of this story has ever been.

Nobody (including me, who is literally obsessed with this aspect of the story) has ever invested themselves in the narrative of Supernatural because they cared about the fate of the cosmic order over and above the fate of the characters who had committed to overthrowing it all, to “tearing up the pages” and writing their own destinies. I mean, we became invested because Sam, Dean, and Cas as characters took us by the hand and invited us to come along with them as they battled against fate for the good of EARTH and HUMANITY.

And certainly, Heaven being a horrific sort of eternal replay of the “highlights” of individual souls greatest hits, where free will didn’t apply as everyone was just boxed away into their individual holodecks to serve as some sort of giant Heaven Battery powering the furtherance of this narrative, this “cosmic order” that had become so powerful it dictated the events and manipulated the lives of people who still existed in the ostensible realm of free will and human life on Earth… that couldn’t stand in the end. But what the narrative (and people I’ve seen attempting to justify the finale as narratively sensible) seems to have forgotten was that all of that was Chuck’s construct to begin with. That without Chuck holding his kingdom in Heaven together, the walls of all those soul cubicles ceased to even be relevant.

After spending their entire lives to this point constantly fighting their way to the absolute pinnacle of the As Above, So Below narrative and pulling the plug on the original creator himself, Humanity should’ve triumphed. And I’d argue that it DID, through Jack restoring the missing essential “humanity” to the divine condition. And, silly me, I thought they’d achieved the promise of “paradise” heralded by Jack’s birth at last, and truly “flipped the entire script of the narrative.”

Ever since they thwarted the original apocalypse, I had hope that they would continue to achieve the same result right up the ladder. Metatron trying to fill the role of Chuck Junior hit his own narrative wall in TFW, while Dean’s battle with the Mark of Cain, and Cain telling him he was “living my life in reverse” and would succumb to destiny by killing his loved ones in the “reverse order” to Cain’s own path to downfall cemented this for me. Dean not only failed to kill any of his loved ones (you didn’t kill your own brother. why?), he SAVED them. He didn’t fulfil the prophecy in reverse, he subverted it. He UNMADE it.

Perhaps I was thinking on too grand a scale, that the ultimate inversion wouldn’t be “God is overthrown and replaced by more of the same,” but “God is overthrown and the entire order of the universe is restructured from the bottom up rather than the top down.

I’d hoped against hope that the conclusion of the narrative would be “As below, so above,” with the fundamental power of human love becoming the new foundation of the cosmic order. It never even occurred to me that “taking back the narrative to rewrite it for ourselves” was not the ultimate goal of Team Free Will, or the ultimate expression of their biggest win.

This whole “well heaven really needed to be rebuilt, there was still work to be done!” seems… irrelevant to me if they’d truly won free of the cosmic narrative. The entire structure of the universe-- including Heaven and Hell-- should’ve defaulted to the paradise state that Jack was literally born to bring to fruition. Wasn’t that the point of his entire role in the story, ultimately?

And if that wasn’t the case in the end, why did we never learn the fate of Hell? Was it just… irrelevant and unchanged after this? Or just… abandoned as a concept entirely? It’s just strange to me to put such a focus on heaven being the sole sphere of import in the end that it undercuts the essential humanity of the narrative for me.

The story itself had kept Heaven on a back burner for years, only occasionally mentioning that the structure of the place was falling further and further into disrepair with a dwindling force of angels struggling to keep the walls in place at all, that it seems like it could’ve been an afterthought at the end of the series rather than a focus so large it required the death of both main characters to make sure we all understood that Heaven Had Changed Now. Because TFW had never been fighting to make Heaven right. They’d been fighting to save the world itself, for humanity to all have a chance to live their lives as their own.

And we didn’t need to see that in the final hope they might get their own lives on Earth to explore. In the end, the fundamental narrative that Life On Earth was dictated by the cosmic structure of creation was never fully subverted. And for me, that’s the main reason I just… can’t accept the finale. It wasn’t a victory of free will and humanity, in the end it was just more of the same.

I appreciate the attempts to take the essential bones of the story we did get and apply a different polish to the surface of the skeleton, but to me it still feels like we’re looking at completely different beasts in the end. Like… to me this was as jarring a revelation as those drawing of modern animals reimagined as dinosaurs entirely based on their skeletons. Like, all along the narrative told me I was looking at a swan. They told me this skeleton they’re building out from is definitely a swan, without a doubt. I know what a swan looks like-- a graceful feather-covered bird with magnificent wings. I trusted that in the end it would be at least remotely swan-looking. And then the finale ended up looking like this

and I just don’t even know where everything went so wrong. Or maybe all along I just assumed they actually knew what a swan looked like, but weren’t sure they could actually pull it off and settled for whatever the heck this is instead. Either way, I’m actually kinda grateful to the finale for being so entirely disappointing on every level, because otherwise I probably would’ve tried to adopt the monstrosity of it anyway. And I’m really, really glad I don’t have to.

#spn 15.20 #spn cosmology #heaven hell purgatory and the empty #and this is why no amount of narrative defense of the finale is capable of making me feel any better about it #i admit i thought too big... but it was all right there in the narrative to see #oh well at least all i have to do to hold on to my grandest notion of the universe is throw out the finale :'D

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ecoamerica · 1 month

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youtube

Watch the 2024 American Climate Leadership Awards for High School Students now: https://youtu.be/5C-bb9PoRLc

The recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by student climate leaders! Join Aishah-Nyeta Brown & Jerome Foster II and be inspired by student climate leaders as we recognize the High School Student finalists. Watch now to find out which student received the $25,000 grand prize and top recognition!

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bigskydreaming · 3 years

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You're asked to choose one and only one or DC's future stops existing immediately. your choices:

1. Jason Todd the anti-hero who seldom works with only a couple of the bats he doesn't hate, for example Dick and Cass VS. Jason Todd who came back with healed body but broken spirit, folded back into the Gotham gang and learns to be part of the society again.

2. Tim Drake who makes all of his mistakes as canon but realizes he's been wrong and apologizes to people VS. Tim Drake back in his first iteration, a cute little brother character who is a reader insert and a fun teenager.

3. JayKyle VS DickKyle.

4. Jason Todd with a sword VS. Damian Wayne with a sword.

5. Chris Kent VS. Jon kent.

Okay but which DC future? Its omniversal future? Its hypertime future? Its multiversal future? Its Elseworlds future? Its dark multiverse future? Mwahahaha your threat is useless because the sheer wtf of DC's continuities, timelines and conflicting declarations of what to even call their multiomnihyperverse makes it impossible to target simply A future! DC's overly unnecessarily complicated nature renders it functionally immortal and impossible to ever truly destroy, take that Darkseid.

I mean. But anyway. Whatevs:

1) I honestly do prefer the idea of Jason someday fully reuniting/reintigrating into the Batfam as a whole, because fuck it, the found family I'm here for is the one where they actually act like a family....I just think it takes actual work to get to that point and I get irey when people are like we're here! We found it! And its like meanwhile, abusive dynamics still abound. Mmm. No thank you. But even though I've been on a huge Jason and Dick and Cass kick for like, forever, I do still aim for him having a dynamic of his own with the rest of the family.

Like the thing is, I hate playing the favorites card in families, and I think the emphasis on so and so being Bruce's favorite child or so and so being this kid's favorite sibling, etc, like it really does feel like to the detriment of the whole family, because once you start validating the idea of favorites, ESPECIALLY in a found family that is CONTINUOUSLY growing....I think you're kinda shooting yourself in the foot because you're kinda creating a situation where either no future new additions to the family can EVER be Bruce or one of the kids' 'favorite' or else you're innately positing that said fave status is conditional and even a current fave of Bruce or a sibling can be bumped down the ladder by the addition of a later arrival....

Which is LITERALLY the entire essence of the eternal conflict between Dick and Damian and Tim fans. Its not even that Damian is Dick's favorite, allegedly, its that prior to Damian's very EXISTENCE, fans felt comfortable declaring Tim unilaterally to be Dick's 'favorite'.....and then all it took was the addition of a single family member who had specific NEEDS in regards to Dick's attention and focus, largely because of his age and needing a legal guardian while Tim was old enough to literally jet set around the world on his own.....and like, everything went up in flames in large corners of fandom.

So I'm just like, death to the fave family member myth, its just incredibly counter productive to the idea of found family as a whole especially when it usually only exists to prop up a preferred character as better than others via the proof of see, these other characters say he's their fave or whatever...but also like, its not even necessary?

Because the thing is, you can have Jason reintegrated into the whole family overall, and still prioritize your personal narrative FOCUS on characters you like more than others, like say Dick and Cass.....because of course its natural for even people in the same family to have entirely different DYNAMICS with different family members....and these dynamics don't have to come with a ranking system in order to prioritize which ones you just focus on more in a story. Because its not necessarily that Dick has to be Jason's fave brother, y'know, just for Jason to prefer spending time with Dick simply because he's more comfortable with him due to knowing him longer or being more secure in the idea that Dick doesn't judge him based on their greater shared history.

This doesn't mean that Jason doesn't care for his other siblings, that he can't have strong dynamics with them as well, its just about finding a reason for why these two specifically might be in a story without the others that doesn't demand putting a definitive ranking on which one Jason considers his FAVE. Just like Damian doesn't have to be Dick's FAVE just for them to have the super close canon relationship they have, even relative to the other siblings, because there's everything needed in canon already to establish that the mere fact of Dick essentially RAISING Damian for a year, and being the first one in the family to really take a chance on Damian, like, this lends itself naturally to them maybe more naturally gravitating towards each other than other siblings due to comfort level and familiarity, etc, but it doesn't have to be like....oh but yeah, I just like Damian more than you, Tim, y'know?

So my answer on this one is a total cop out of both, both is good. Jason totally reintegrated back into the family, but with dynamics that still lend themselves fairly easily towards story lineups where its just him running missions with Dick or Duke or any other one or two specific family members even if for no other reason than they gel together best in the field, y'know?

2) Hmm. I honestly really do love and miss 90s Tim Drake and just....don't see him in a lot of what I read these days. I'm like no, why did he have to go, he was doing so well! BUT I'm also on a big accountability kick, and like, I'm so steeped in fics where Dick GROVELS for forgiveness for every little slight he's ever done real or imagined, with every character but Tim in particular, so its like.....I'm not gonna lie, I really have a preference these days for seeing stuff where its literally anyone actually owning up to shit they've done to Dick and apologizing or groveling or making it to HIM, like, completely unconditionally. In the same manner we usually see Dick apologizing, glossing over any reasons he might have had for doing what he did or feeling the way he did, and saying oh it doesn't matter, putting the entirety of his focus on what HE did and why it was wrong no matter what and he's sorry.....that's what I would kill to see from more fics, just in reverse.

Because so often even in the all too rare fics where we DO see other characters apologizing to Dick for shit, its watered down with Dick volunteering that oh he messed up too, it was a two way street, and its like no! This is Pettiness Hours! I want the unconditional apologies! Give me the groveling! From anyone, I don't care at this point, lol, just show me characters actually PUTTING IN THE WORK to make it up to Dick for harm they've caused him, even if completely unintentionally or via neglecting his feelings or considering the repercussions their actions or words would have on him. Aaaaaaand, frankly, Tim's a good place to start there, because of how one sided all the takes on their conflicts have been for so many years. I mean, if people need a place to start, Batman and Robin Eternal gets enough praise it can't be pretended that people in fandom don't know that story exists, so how about some stories where Tim says he's fucking sorry for punching Dick in issue #4 or #5 of that one, and it was uncalled for and he was clearly just looking for an excuse to unleash some more of his resentment and upset for the Spyral/Forever Evil stuff, and family deciding that its totally okay to punch Dick whenever they're mad at him and need to work off some aggression so they can then finally forgive him (for now) is a trend that needs to die in a fire post-haste? I mean just as an example.

But the thing that kills me about fanfic trends is like....the sameness of so much of it. There's SO much room for variety and diverse takes, and like....I don't actually hate Tim! I'm just cranky because of the imbalanced nature of most content out there for literal years at this point. Push the pendulum BACK in the other direction, create some balance by showing the flip side of things.....and that leaves a lot more room for me and others of like minds to then be more amenable to - and even interested in - other stories that don't scratch this particular itch, but don't need to, because other stories are doing the scratching by then, y'know?

And THEN like, at that point, I would be ALL FOR more stories that are just callbacks to classic 90s Tim who I adore, with his skateboarding and his EARNESTNESS and his go-get-em spirit and also the gumption. All the gumption. I like that Tim. I do miss that Tim. But like, for the moment, like, I want accountable Tim because I am tiiiiiiiired of groveling Dick and tbh at this point its not enough for me to just see people move past putting Dick in that position and just have mutually respective and doting brothers Dick and Tim having adventures together......nah, first I want some reciprocation. Ngl. Gimme the apologies for actual mistakes actually made.

3) DickKyle. Easy question, c'mon, you gotta know that. LOL. ;)

But yeah, I've been shipping these two off their like, two shared pages from way back in the Obsidian Age story years before Jason even returned, let alone was in Countdown together with Kyle, so like, its no contest. I don't mind JayKyle, I certainly prefer it to JayRoy tbh, but there's not a ton of appeal in it for me, particularly in how its usually depicted, because like....the entire basis of JayKyle is that they DO have stories together and spent a whole year worth of weekly issues traveling the multiverse together in Countdown.....but there's like, practically no trace of their actual dynamics from that series or any specifics of literally any issue from that entire comic in most fics I’ve read, so its like.....idk, it tends to come across as more generic, not in the sense that it cant still be interesting, but more in the sense that it feels like just someone paired with Jason just because history between them EXISTS without any interest in exploring what that history actually IS....and at that point, its like, well there's no reason TO prioritize that ship over DickKyle for me personally, when like, I have a shit ton of headcanon reasons for why those two in a pairing specifically. *Shrugs* My logic. Its not for everyone, but it works for me.

4) Jason with a sword or Damian with a sword? I don't understand the question. Both. Both is good. All the characters should have swords. Swords are awesome.

5) Chris Kent vs Jon Kent - oof. I adore Jon, I really do. I love his dynamic with Damian, I love a lot of their specific stories, the parallels between them as friends and Bruce and Clark as friends....its all very bien. But I gotta give this one to Chris, because I'm always gonna have a soft spot for him because I'm a sucker for all abused kid heroes, and I just miss that funky little dude so much. There's so many stories we didn't get with him and were just ripe for the picking, but nooooo, DC's like lol you can't have nice things, here we just rebooted the entire multiverse and now Clark and Lois never adopted the son of Clark's worst Kryptonian rival and raised him with tender love and care awww does that make you sad, were you invested in him, WELL TOO BAD, HE'S GONE NOW AND BASICALLY NEVER EXISTED, NOW GIVE US YOUR MONEY ANYWAY MWAHAHAHAHAH.

Yeah. I'm still not over that. Probably will never be tbh, so I with great grudge-bearing do affirm that I'm gonna go with Chris on this one and like, he is a Priority for me and I'm still very keen on the idea of him and Duke being besties for random reasons that might not make sense to anyone but me, but eh, whatever.

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sir-subpar · 3 years

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Double Agent (Panstick) Part 1

*Inside job AU: An au where Dave was purposefully Helping Henry throughout the series. Like a double agent. Someone on Tumblr proposed this idea to me and I decided to write/draw stuff for it.*

Henry sat in his cell, as two officers approached him. Rupert and Dave.

"Oi you! You're free to go!"

"Haha! Not really. But you got a package. Don't get your hopes up, we already checked it. Didn't we Dave?"

"Huh? Oh! Yeah of course I checked it. If I didn't check it I would lose my job and I don't wanna lose my job! Hehehe…" The two walked away, Henry opened the package, then looked up to see Dave wink at him before leaving the room. Henry smiled, Dave always had his back. His hero.

…

Henry crouched behind some bushes outside the museum with his newest goal: the Tunisian Diamond. Henry pulled out his phone, shooting Dave a text. Dave was inside near the history exhibit, when he felt his phone buzz in his pocket. Dave checked his notifications to see a message from Henry.

Henry: I'm outside rn gonna sneak in.

Dave: idk Henry… I might have to catch you if you break in ;)

Henry: lol

Dave: Don't worry, I gotchu <3

Henry: thx see you soon :)

Dave chuckled, putting his phone in his pocket. He glanced around the room, he glanced at his coworker. He had to distract him if Henry was gonna get in. Time for his "incompetence" to shine again. "So, why'd you decide to be a security guard?" Dave asked. Kurt rolled his eyes, "It's a job that pays, that should be enough." He replied rudely. Dave cringed internally. Great. Why couldn't he have been partnered with someone more chatty? Despite his minor annoyance, Dave continued. "Haha yeah… I get that. I used to be a policeman, but it didn't really work out. There was this one prisoner we had in holding…" Dave rambled, if he just kept talking, Henry could get through easily. "My coworker used to tease him a lot. But that's not important I guess. Anyway, he was there for like a month. One time he got this package, like some prisoners do. So I gave it to him, but I uhh forgot to check it. There was a cake in the box and there was something in the cake so he used it to escape. And then I lost my job." "Ugh. Please. Shut up." Kurt said, clearly annoyed. Before Dave could respond, a model plain slammed into the back of Kurt's head. Rendering him completely unconscious. Dave looked across the room, there was the man of the hour, Henry himself, who had somehow created a huge hole in the wall. Dave felt somewhat relieved that he didn't have to keep talking to his rude coworker, but he couldn't break character just yet. "Oh no! I gotta warn somebody!" Dave smiled at Henry briefly, then started running towards one of the support beams in the building, then slammed into it, falling to the ground. Henry rushed to Dave's side, worried that he might've actually gotten hurt. "Don't worry about me, I'm fine." Dave winked at Henry, then closed his eyes. Henry smiled and gave him a quick peck on the forehead before running off to finish his mission. When Dave "regained consciousness" he was surprised to find that his boss wouldn't fire him despite the fact that Henry's heist was successful. He couldn't wait to see Henry later, he was probably ecstatic.

…

Dave walked to Henry's hideout, he was the only other person who knew where it was. They usually spent a lot of time together in that hideout. It was their little corner of the world, a safe space just for them. Dave knocked on the door. "Henry! It's me! Can I come in?" The door opened. Revealing the thief. "Well if it isn't my knight in shining armor." "Hi Henry!" The two hugged each other, it had been a while since they had hung out like this. Dave kissed Henry on the cheek. "So what's your plan now?" Dave asked "Gotta lay low for now." The thief replied. "I guess I'll be visiting you here more often then, huh?" Dave said in a slightly flirty voice, wrapping his arms around Henry's waist. "Looks like you will." Henry chuckled, returning Dave's embrace. "C'mon, let's eat some dinner. You're probably tired."

…

Dave was true to his word, he did visit Henry when he could. He was happy to do so. It got easier over time, as news of the Tunisian Diamond faded in relevance, being replaced by stories about some big band of criminals. Eventually Henry was able to visit Dave at his apartment in town, instead of Dave having to go to the forest. Henry walked through the intricate plants in the jungle, annoyed when a branch hit him in the face. Getting to and from the hideout was always a hassle thanks to how remote it was. But it was a necessary evil. After a long time of walking, he finally arrived at the place Dave called home. His legs were sore from the long walk, he just wanted to sit down and cuddle with Dave. He knocked on the door. "Davey! I'm here!" Henry waited for his love to open the door. And he waited. And uh, waited. No response. He knocked on the door again, feeling uneasy. "Dave?" Still no response. Maybe he was at work? Henry decided to give Dave a phone call. He probably just went to the store or something. Henry selected Dave's phone contact, waiting for him to pick up. It went straight to voicemail. He tried again, and got the same result. No response from Dave. Now he was worried. Why wasn't he answering? Henry, feeling panicked, knocked on the door. "D-Dave? Are you there!? DAVE!" No response. Where was he?

#henry stickmin #double agent dave #henry x dave #dave x henry #dave panpa #panstick #henry stickmin x dave panpa

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thespoonisvictory · 3 years

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“Techno and Wilbur make Cave Better” Key Conversations

Hi, so I’m doing a big Pogtopida Wilbur analysis rn, mainly of this stream, and I basically decided to transcribe all major events, conversations, and quotes for the masses, to reference during said analysis.

This was such a good stream to look at, and there’s some really interesting stuff to analyze, as Wilbur interacts with almost every portion of the story and develops his character in a really interesting way. I definitely recommend watching the stream if you want to understand Wilbur’s character, or at least read this. If you like to write meta, have fun with this oh boy.

Major quotes and full conversations are bolded for clarity, timestamps are added, and names are shortened when writing dialogue. If the character is not tagged Wilbur is the one speaking (W = Wilbur, TU = Tubbo, F = Fundy, S = Schlatt, and TO = Tommy).

“Hey Techno. I’m in a better mood today. I’m in a better- do you know I’m- I’m over fucking losing Manburg y’know.” 11.08

“The revolution is coming. the only difference is I’m not gonna be sad while doing it. I’m gonna be happy, while revolting.” 11.20

“Hey Techno, do you wanna see how over Manburg I am, dude? How over L’Manburg I am? You ready for this? *reveals Pogtopia skin*” 11.25

“That filthy, dirty, coat. I didn’t wash it once, I’ll be honest with you, Technoblade.” 11.40

*Techno shows him the farm, Wilbur is concerned but a little frightened by the amount of time he’s spent on this lol*

“First, I think, I wanna make this place look nicer, cause I won’t be able to work in this cavern if it’s just like, if it’s natural generation, y’know?” 14.33

*they join vc with tubbo*

“Tubbo’s one of the few people I trust, Technoblade. Like, I’m still figuring you out right now, but, at the moment, Tubbo seems to be pretty on the ball. He seems pretty keen on the whole spying thing.” 16.13

“See the thing is, Tubster, can I call you Tubster? Cool, cool. See the thing is Tubbony, I need help, today. Tubbo, do you know anything about super smelters.” 16.53

*they meet up in Manburg to go to Pogtopia, Wilbur doesn’t feel safe coming too close*

“Tubbo. You’ve lost the revolutionary gear. I’m so proud of you man, I’m so proud of you. We’ve finally moved on. It’s the next part!” 19.32

*Wilbur is visibly upset by Tubbo wearing the suit, despite it being a “disguise” and him saying Schlatt’s name, however*

“I was sleeping last night, before I changed my clothes, and I thought to myself, I thought to myself Tubbo you’ve done so much for our great nation.”20.17

“Have you heard of the Sunk Cost Fallacy?” *Wilbur explains the fallacy* “So, in that logic, I think you are physically incapable of giving up. I think you’re physcially incapable of giving up L’manburg. Because you’ve put in so much effort! You’ve put in so much work, y’know. So that’s why...” 22.12

*Wilbur shows Tubbo Pogtopia*

“Pogtopia isn’t a nation, as much as Tommy seems to think it is. We’re a commune, now. Don’t call me Mr President anymore, Tubbo, you’ve gotta call me, uh, Wilbs... In the commune, we’re all equal, we’re all comrades. We’re all equal” 24.24

*Wilbur compares them to Russian revolutionaries*

“Except with this Russian revolution, we’re not all gonna die. And also the nation we’re gonna make afterwards will not fail.” (oh god I’m sad) 25.15

*they talk about the super smelter, wilbur and tubbo are wholesome :(*

W: “Welcome to the commune, welcome to Pogtopia. Now, I know what you’re thinking, you’re thinking Wilbur- Wilbur-”

TU: “I think it looks lovely”

W: “oh, see I thought you were gonna say ‘Wilbur Wilbur this looks like shit’, and I was gonna say ‘yes Tubbo, yes it does look shit’”

TU: “I mean, you obviously- I don’t think you’ve seem Manburg lately.”

Wilbur’s tone becomes serious, maybe angry “I haven’t seen Manburg lately. Why do you rub this in.”

TU: “What- no- I didn’t mean it like that-”

W: “No- I heard you man-”

TU: “No, it’s really gone quite in the opposite direction-”

Wilbur’s tone cheers up a bit. “Oh- it’s bad? It looks bad?

TU: “Yeah”

W: “Oh, that’s brilliant, that’s great news, Tubbo, thank you, I-, that means that when we go and fix it- let me show you...” 27.40

*Wilbur wants to add more people to Pogtopia, tells Techno to get more food*

*Wilbur talks about possibly exporting “Pogtopia Potatoes” to L’manburg, and poisoning them. This is never brought up again though and isn’t treated seriously*

“I wanna make sure it looks nice for when the gang gets on.” 31.35

*Schlatt joins the game, and joins vc. Wilbur is immediately panicked, telling him to make an alibi*

“How’s running L’man-Manburg going for you?” “It’s going great.” “Yeah, it’s a lovely place isn’t it, nice situation.” 34.30

*this continues a bit, Wilbur is very obviously not a big fan of this conversation. Schlatt talks about demolishing things. Wilbur’s tone is soft and somber*

W: “Oh- What are you demolishing.”

S: “The Elton John house.”

W: “Oh- that was-”

S: “I reckon we’ll take the rocket down as well, and maybe uh-”

W: “oh- ok”

S:“what is this thing, whad’you call this thing, Tubbo?”

T: “This is that cAHmrvan van”

W: *quietly* “the camARvan”

S: “The cAHmarvan?”

W: *quietly* “The camARvan”

S: “That’s a stupid name, I reckon we put a big apartment building right over it.”

*Wilbur moves away from his desk in shock, the conversation continues, Wilbur is shocked by the dress code being suits as Schlatt insults the revolutionary uniforms, leaves vc*

“Techno- I fucking hate him, Technoblade. He’s the fucking worst, you get it, you get it don’t you? He’s everything- he’s everything I cannot stand.” 37.32

*Wilbur talks about dismantling the oppressive government, and quotes Spongebob. They chat for bit, both misunderstanding anarchy dear god*

“One thing I really want to make sure of, cause as much as I’m still not entirely trustful of Tubbo, because he said it was a disguise... Tubbo said that he was wearing the suit as a disguise, right. Turns out that’s true. Turns out it’s the dresscode. So, Tubbo lied to me, which is not the best start for our political relationship, but y’know it’s cool, at least he’s actually online today, unlike- unlike one of my right hand men.”40.26

“Whilst I’m not entirely trustful of Tubbo, I would- still don’t wanna see him get hurt by Schlatt” 41.19

*Wilbur rejoins Schlatt’s vc. He’s still really bitter about being removed from Manburg. The whole Schlatt has diamonds in his furnace conversation happens. Schlatt asks where Niki lives, and Wilbur immediately leaves vc*

“Techno we need to get to the docks, this is your first mission under us, please comrade, please. armor. armor. We need to get to Manburg quickly, this isn’t a drill, this is first thing. We’re not gonna attack we’re just gonna watch, and then see what happens.”45.06

*Techno is mining, and Wilbur says he’ll get there on his own time before leaving. Wilbur arrives in Manburg and is disgusted by the apartment buildings, venturing in while Techno has no clue where Manburg is*

*Wilbur goes into Niki’s bakery* “I think Schlatt’s just mugged Niki” 49.14

“Which is why I need you here, Technoblade. You’re kinda my last resort.” 50.00

*Wilbur looks over Manburg and watches Niki, Fundy, Schlatt, and Tubbo interact. They join Niki’s vc, Techno isn’t keeping hidden well and Wilbur is stressed. Wilbur is trying to balance both of them and making all the calls.*

W: “Niki I’ve gotta go, Niki I’ve gotta go, I promise- I- look- if- we’re in too much of a hot position right now to take in everyone from every sort of like person we need into our new cave. So you’re gonna have to hold out in Manburg a bit longer. Is that ok?”

N: “Of course. I will.”

W: “Mm k.”

N: “Take care, Wil.”

W: “Thank you.”

W is obviously distraught at leaving her behind, but leaves vc. 55.05

Techno isn’t in vc, and Wilbur just softly goes “Comrade Technoblade? Is he- I’m on my own. I’m on my own.” 55.38

*Tommy joins the game and Techno joins vc* “I thought he was gone, no it’s Tommy. I didn’t think he’d be coming on, I didn’t think he’d- oh thank god!”

*they join vc with Tubbo Punz and Schlatt. Techno offers to “initiate order Kennedy” and Wilbur freaks out*

*Fundy joins vc*

S: “Fundy- Fundy- I y’know I wasn’t gonna do this so early into my reign, but I think you should have a promotion. I mean this is just such a good idea, this is just such a good idea.”

F: “You’re being very generous here Schlatt.”

W panics. “Don’t give him promotions, he’s too young, he doesn’t understand, he’s- he needs to learn more. No- he needs to learn more, I should know he’s my son.”

S: “I’m promoting him.”

F: “Wilbur, Imma need you to shut up for a second.”

W: “Don’t you speak like that to me, Fundy. Don’t forget where you came from, Fundy.”

S: “What’s the relationship between you and Wilbur, Fundy?”

F: *sigh* “Wilbur, he’s just a founder, and I was born here, and nothing else. It’s literally everything there is to is to it.”

W, softly and sadly: “You know that’s not-”

Schlatt interrupts: “See, it’s so great to have natural-born citizens of Manburg, taking the country direction into their own hands. I mean, I really over this purple stripe, instead of that ugly blue one.”

*Wilbur has hand over his mouth in disbelief and sadness

F: “I must agree.”

*F and S continue to talk*

W, seemingly on the verge of tears: “I don’t know who you are anymore, Fundy, I don’t know who you are anymore.” he leaves the vc and joins Tommy.

“I couldn’t be there anymore.” 1.01.36

*Immediately, Tommy tries to talk to him, while Wilbur is obviously angry and upset. Tommy is waiting for his command to burn down the flag.”

TO:“I’m stood here, by the flag with a flint and steel, Wilbur.”

W, panicked. “Tommy control yourself, control yourself, it’s not worth it.”

TO: “Do I take my shot?”

W: “Tommy do not take your shot.”

TO: “Wilbur he disrespected you!”

W, even more panicked: “He disrespected me, yes but we’ve talked about this Tommy. Tommy, if we cast the first stone-”

TO: “Wilbur, I wanna do it Wilbur.”

*now Tubbo shows up, holding a book*

W: “Tubbo, what is that book?”

TO: “I wanna do it!”

TU: “It’s, um, it’s nothing much, it’s not really anything worth worrying about.”

W, softly: “What is it. Why are you holding it.”

TU: “It’s- Schlatt has given me- It’s the papers Schlatt made me. Yeah, it’s what he, yeah.”

W: “Give it to me.”

TU: “Are you sure?”

TO at the same time: “Wilbur tell me now Fundy’s coming up. Do I light the fires of victory, of independence?”

*W is reading the book MANBURG TO-DO*

TU: “Uh- I’m gonna need that back”

TO at the same time: I could do with a clear yes or no, this isn’t a- as much as silence is-

W interrupts, suddenly angry: “Tommy burn that place to the ground. Burn that place to the ground and try to as many people trapped in it as possible.”

TO laughs

TU: “I’m gonna need that book back- oh- oo.”

*W throws the book back*

TO: “Wilbur do I kill your son?”

W, no longer distracted: “Keep him alive, Tommy.”

TO: “Again- I could do, I’m actually-”

W: “Tommy, we’re comrades here.”

TO: “Wilbur, take one look at Manburg, cause it ain’t no more!”

W: “Tubbo, take me to Manburg.”

TU: “Ok.”

TO: “I could kill Schlatt and Big Q right now.”

W: “Keep them alive, we need them alive Tommy.”

TO: “Can I just shoot em once?”

W, exasperated: “If you want.”

TO: “Yeah, I did. It’s more of my own self fulfillment.”

W: *sighs* “We’ve cast the first stone. Our little ravine is now, it’s now in a difficult spot.” 1.03.30

*Wilbur meets Tubbo at Manburg and they head back to Pogtopia*

TO: “The flags gone, and your son is corrupt.”

W: “I know he is, and I don’t need reminding of that, Tommy.” 1.06.30

*Schlatt joins vc and tells Tommy to leave Manburg, and leaves again. Wilbur tells Tommy again not to burn down the forest, and is legitimately upset at the idea. He says it’s the thing they’re fighting against. Techno rejoins vc*

“Tommy, if you don’t fix the mistake you’ve made here, I don’t know if you’re the best fit for Pogtopia.” 1.10.46

*Wilbur asks Tubbo and Techno if they’ve checked the forest, but they’re both busy*

W: “Alright well I’ll go and looking for the fucking forest, I guess. I have to do everything around here.”

*Tubbo and Techno protest.*

W: “No no no, it’s fine you two are doing much harder work than I am.” 1.12.37

*Tubbo and Wilbur talk about how Quackity isn’t happy under Schlatt, how he’s protesting a lot of Schlatt’s measures.*

“He’s a man who I thought, really cared about his nation, but, hey y’know, I’ve been wrong before.” 1.13.55

*the conversation shifts to Fundy, and Wilbur recounts what Fundy said, clearly upset. Tubbo is shocked by this*

“It’s ok, it’s ok, y’know, cause, it’s fine! I- y’know, bonds are formed in blood, not family blood, the other blood, the blood where you stab shit. Yeah, that’s where bonds are formed.”1.14.55

*Tubbo, Techno, and Wilbur chat more, Schlatt joins vc for a bit. Tubbo and Wilbur keep up the bit that Tubbo is loyal to Schlatt until he leaves. Tubbo says explained his absence to Schlatt*

“Tubbo, you’re- see with Technoblade, right, I have no doubt that Technoblade is on my side, right. Cause with Technoblade, with Technoblade, right, I know that he wants blood, and he wants war. Cause that’s how Technoblade works y’know. He just wants to fight and he wants to kill bad guys, right. Yeah, look at him, he a little libertarian- little anarchist, right. So here’s what I’m saying, right: you however- little, I can’t tell if you’re cozying up to Schlatt to help spy, or if you’re cozying up to Schlatt because you quite like how he treats you. I mean look, Tubbo, I’ll be the first one to say it, I didn’t always treat you the best, on L’Manburg, and I know I didn’t, I- I- I was somewhat of a distant ruler- I pretty much only- don’t agree that fucking excitedly, man- look I wasn’t the best ruler I know I wasn’t. Well I think I was a good ruler, but I, I- Tubbo I don’t know if you are just prefering his rule over mine, and I feel like I gotta win you over.”

TU seems to disagree, but says ok.

TU: “Well I’m making this farm, I wouldn’t be putting in this much time if I wasn’t.”

W: No I know, I know, but that’s probably what’d you be saying to Schlatt as well if you were doing work for him.”

TU: “That is- that is very- yeah that is very true, actually.” 1.25.07

*Tubbo says his excuse is that he was pregnant in the name of being transparent. They discuss plans for the farm, and the stream ends*

Wilbur, raiding Niki: “Now, Niki is currently probably the last person who I know is on our side,, who I know is definitely on our side right now. And she, basically, is just sort of trapped in Manburg, cause I can’t get her out, cause we’ve got Tubbo out that’s fine, but I can’t get Niki out for a while. She’s being taxed and she’s being watched very closely by Schlatt. More closely than Tubbo, weirdly, and Schlatt is just being a horrible person to her as you know. So I’m gonna need you to go over there and I’m gonna need you to give her some love. “ <3 1.31.52

#wilbur soot #dream smp #dsmp #dsmp analysis #technoblade #tubbo #tommyinnit #meta #long post #transcripts #this took so long my hands hurt

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not-using-this1 · 3 years

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So I made another oneshot...I know it’s terrible lol.

She Cares Pt.1

Yelena Belova x fem!reader :)

~~~~

After coming back from a mission, Y/n is told by Natasha that Yelena is in the med-bay in the tower, as during a mission her arm was badly burnt and got shot in the shoulder during her and Nat' mission. Y/n, worried (although Yelena just hates everyone except Y/n but she hides it) goes to see her. Yelena surprised by that, she tries to put a new bandage over her arm and shoulder but Y/n ends up helping with her.

Natasha Tells Y/n this because she knows she cares about Yelena and Yelena cares about her.

———

Mission finally over. You let out a sigh of relief, when you, Clint and Steve had finally landed the quinjet at the Avengers Tower. It was mainly just a recon mission. You were their back-up which they did need once or twice. Luckily none of them got majorly hurt. You did pick up a few bruises and minor scratches but that was about it. "Thanks again for being our back-up, Y/n." Steve called out just as you walk off.

Entering the tower, you were greeted by Sam who just waved at you as he played the video-game in the living quarters as per-usual when he had a day off. "Glad to see you back in one piece" he called out before turning back to the game. "Thanks, I do try." you chuckled a little before walking down the hallway. You really needed to get out of your mission gear and have a shower, get into something comfortable (the mission gear was comfortable but not as much as you'd like it to be). Just before you could get to your room, you were met with Natasha, casually wearing sweatpants and a tank top.

If you had to guess the first time you met Natasha and she reccomended you to Tony, you'd never guess she worse such casual clothes but here you were, in front of her. In all honesty, you didn't even know why she reccomended you because you have quite dangerous fire powers, but you came to learn that it wasn't just the powers but the way you fought without them (hand-to-hand wise and weapon wise, you only ever used your powers for emergencies).

"Hey, glad you came back in one piece." She greets you with a smile. Her smiles still surprised you, no matter if you knew her before joining the Avengers. But you were glad she was smiling. "You too Nat. How was your mission?" You asked her. You remembered that she left on a mission two hours before you this morning with Yelena. "The usual, spy mission. Except, Yelena isn't doing too well." Natasha mentioned.

The words 'Yelena isn't doing too well' worried you, regardless if Yelena practically hated everyone here and rarely talked to any of you except Natasha; well there were a few times she'd talk to you but it was only brief. You even made her laugh a few times once. You hadn't a clue why but you never felt intimidated by the blonde russian like most of the others do. You felt safe around her and also attached. Trying to hide how worried you are didn't work very well and the redhead caught on so quickly.

"She's in the medical room, probably changing her bandage now. I was going to go but you can, if you'd like. I'm sure she won't mind you." What Natasha says is true but you never once thought that Yelena actually liked you no matter if you made her laugh, you sometimes frustrated her to. "But, she doesn't like me." You responded with. Natasha rolled her eyes at you and sighed "What makes you say that Y/n? Yelena 'doesn't like' a lot of people, but you aren't one of them, trust me. You made her laugh and even smile, remember." You knew that Natasha was also correct about that.

You thought about it for a while and yes, you were worried about her. So thanking Natasha silently for telling you; you practically legged it to the elevator, going to the floor which had Tony and Bruce's labs on it but also the medical room. You thought about going to greet them when you saw them, but you figured that they'd be busy and plus you really wanted to know if Yelena was alright.

Entering the med-bay rather quietly, you spotted Yelena sat on one of the tables, trying to sort out the two bandages she had around her, one on the left shoulder and the other on the right arm. "Hello Y/n, what do you want?" That halted all your plans to sneak up on her (which ideally was a terrible idea in the first place). You should of known better than to sneak up on a spy. Walking towards her without a care in the world, you stopped in front of her. "I just wanted to know if you were okay, Natasha told me." You spoke truthfully.

Yelena scoffed "Why would you care?" Her russian accent heavy. Wow you thought to yourself, you're just genuinely concerned is all and she's just being a bitch about it. You wanted to know why she was so angry (although you could guess it, considering she went through what Natasha did as a child). "Because you're part of the team." You answer.

Yelena laughed slightly at your answer, she sighed and tried to continue to take off the bandages to replace them. You could tell it must be painful because she whinced the slightest bit. "Oh please, I'm only here because Natasha made me, Fury wants to keep an eye on me. In case I decide to kill you all." Knowing that was something Yelena would of course say you chose to ignore the sentence.

"You can leave." She added, still trying to get the bandages off herself. You sighed "I was gonna ask if you needed help, but clearly you don't." You say as you casually started walking away from the blonde spy. You heard Yelena spout a curse word in russian and turned back to look at her for a second, she was really struggling. Rolling your eyes you walk back over to her, grab two new bandages from the cabinet and turn to her once again.

"Stop being so stubborn and let me help" She glared at you, quite angrily for a good minute before she even decided to let you help her out, "fine."

Taking the large bandage that covered her right arm first, she let out a rather painful sigh, when you saw the damage you were horrified, an entire burn covered her arm, you mouthed an 'I'm sorry' at the russian before proceeding with some anti-bacterial cream that helped with the burns, which she passed you on the table she was sat up on. Lightly dabbing it on the burn over her skin. Yelena was good at hiding pain, but this time it really hurt. "How did that happen?" You asked her.

"Natasha was being stupid blew up half the factory, that caused the burn on my arm. The bullet wound was my fault." She added, her voice rather soft this time. "You can bandage your arm up, right? I'll get your shoulder bandage changed." You add.

Yelena agree's and starts bandaging the burn back up, you on the other hand change the bandage on her shoulder where the bullet wound was. It must of been a pain to get the bullet out because she saw how big the stitches were, luckily she didn't need to take the stitches out for another two weeks. You decided against a large bandage and put one of the bandage plasters on it instead, which was big enough. "There all done, letting me help wasn't so bad now was it?" You chuckled.

Yelena put her thumb under your chin, making you look up at her. In reality you were only two inches away from her height but since she was sat up on a table you had to look up at her. "I'm only going to say this once, thank you." She gave you a smile but it quickly disappeared.

"You should really get those scratches on your face checked out, don't want to ruin that pretty face of yours. But I gotta say, you look badass with them." Yelena suddenly blurts out. She smirked at you "You think I'm pretty?" You asked her amused by her previous statement.

"Don't push it Y/n. Sit up here, I'm returning the favour." She replies. You nod your head and sit up on the table, while she grabs something to clean the scratches on your face. You smiled, you couldn't believe that Yelena thought you were 'pretty'. You had thought about complimenting her back, you really didn't want to push it but in the end you said fuck it.

As she sat up on the table with you, turning you to her so she could clean your face, the dried blood on your busted bottom lip.

"You're not so bad yourself, Belova."

She didn't reply back, she just smirked and continued returning the favour to you.

#yelena belova #yelena belova x reader #yelena belova x fem!reader #yelena belova x you #she cares about y/n #marvel #oneshots #I can’t write at all #lesbian Yelena belova #black widow

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thelovelyghostwriter · 3 years

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do you think kuraneon is gonna be canon in the official hxh universe and what must have happened?

Whether or not they would be canon is up to Sir Togashi himself. While he does have romantic elements in his previous works like Yu Yu Hakusho and Ten de Showaru Cupid, it's not as explicit in HxH (e.g. Meruem/Komugi).

If you asked me this before knowing about the KuraNeon Marriage Theory (will give a link in the reblog later on) and KuraNeon paired up in mobile games, I would have said "0% chance" because we do not see them interact on-screen (even if I had shipped them since I first laid my eyes on Neon).

However, it is kinda sus that Kurapika became a Nostrade Family Young Boss; with Light and Neon nowhere shown. The more "accepted" theory is that Light is unable to continue and Neon is dead (although I do have rebuttals about Neon being dead - that's another conversation). I do wonder why he had to keep their mafia family name - there is no reason to if he truly let them wither. But from Light's last appearance in a manga panel, Kurapika did reassure him that he'll handle everything and you see the Nostrade mafia family organisation doing well under Kurapika. Which is also why my friend went to bring up that plausible KuraNeon Marriage Theory.

I know that a lot of people think they don’t interact, but that is on-screen. After York New City arc, we don’t see Kurapika until way later, however him being in charge as the Nostrade Boss indicates that he stayed with the Nostrades. God knows what they did while living under one roof.

Another thing that is major sus is the mobile games. Even non-shippers are baffled why KuraNeon is a thing. Kurapika and Neon are seen dressed as Hikoboshi and Orihime in two sets of the mobage cards; a romantic couple that is known in a Japanese legend and celebrated on 7 July (Tanabata Festival). They are even shown writing on coloured papers in one of the cards + Kurapika holding a bamboo - these coloured papers are used during the Tanabata festival where wishes are written on them and hung on bamboo. It is believed that the reunion between the two lovers Hikoboshi and Orihime are so joyous that they grant the wishes of the people. As far as I know, the only pairing that gets to have a Orihime/Hikoboshi theme in their cards is Machi/Hisoka; and we do see Hisoka/Machi having a soft spot for one another in canon (in the current arc, Machi does patch him up after his defeat and Hisoka spared her).

Hmmm.. I should make a post about this whole Tanabata thing actually. Asides from that, they are also the v-day banner in 2019 for the games and she gave him a cake during the valentine’s day event, to which showed a scene of him thinking about what to give her back (and low and behold, Kurapika’s White’s Day card featured him with a gift and him wearing the same outfit of the scene where he thought about what to give her).

In a separate mobile game, they have a special attack together. Their mobage cards have identical backgrounds and themes. Therefore, it isn’t just one mobile game that does this. It makes me wonder why the official team devs do that when this pairing shipping sub-fandom is really small and many even dislike it.

Even as a shipper, it also baffles me why devs do that when they have little screentime together (gotta be more objective here). If you do consider the KuraNeon Marriage Theory or consider that they might end up together in the manga, it makes sense why the official hxh game devs pair them together. And I am unsure about the source - but I think for Japanese manga production of non-manga material, you need approval from the writer? All the more to be suspicious of the mobile games that contains KuraNeon above every single pairing out there.

Hence, if you ask me, there is a chance of Kurapika/Neon being canon. How that might happen is a little tricky and depending on the type of portrayal they will be (I have four interpretations of this ship on my pinned post lol).

I’m not sure if you only define canon as the vanilla/romantic type, or it also includes one that is a little twisted. I've noticed that hxh has friendship and family dynamics that are already complicated and not as wholesome as one would think. I do believe that if KuraNeon were to be canon, it would be the latter interpretation.

There are actually a few things that are needed to be considered for it to happen: 1) Neon’s fate - she needs to be alive (or maybe not) Now, a lot of people believe she died because Chrollo’s book speculates that she does. However, we don’t see her dead body. It’s literally just Chrollo’s interpretation. This is contrasted by Kurapika that states that the previous Scarlet Eye owners did not need to be killed (and the “daughter of a mafia leader” is one of them). If the daughter of a mafia leader is truly Neon, then it brings a question of who should you believe more: Chrollo or Kurapika? (Imo it’s super interesting how these two guys who are enemies have different narratives on the same girl).

Of course, there was this potential discrepancy I found while re-watching this arc. The Scarlet Eyes that Kurapika bidded for 2.9 billion was a fake. They thought it was stolen when Squala took it with him and died - but it was actually that Kortopi’s Gallery Fake copy disappears after 24hour. So technically, the Eyes is with the Troupe. Now, assuming that Togashi has not forgotten this detail (I believe he still remembers), I do think that it is possible that since Chrollo is the type to get bored of the stuff he steals, he will just sell it and it will be obtained by the later owners. As for “the daughter of a mafia leader”, I’m sure it’s Neon that Kurapika is referring to - be it him mentioning her as merely a previous owner despite the set of Scarlet Eyes being “stolen” or she bought another set. (There is a chance that is not Neon, but another daughter of a random mafia leader, but what are the chances of another daughter being like that?)

I guess I just wanted to point this detail out because many people readily believed Chrollo’s book (it was not even himself). He stated that he did not know when it disappeared.

As for that “Hisoka killed Neon” theory, while it is believable and interesting, the only thing that is doubtful for that is that a) Hisoka could not have gone off to kill Neon in such a short period of time, b) that would be an insult to Kurapika’s capabilities if she was under his care, c) the fortune-telling ability doesn’t bother Hisoka. Pakunoda and Hisoka had a short conversation about the fortune and both of them acknowledged that the future changed. Hisoka wrote over his fortune despite having a good one to manipulate the events in hopes of fighting Chrollo - that is an indication of his belief that he writes his own future, and therefore which is why I argue that the fortune-telling ability never bothered him.

As for the “Kurapika killed Neon” theory, I think... they all need to get one thing straight about Kurapika: as much as possible, except for the spiders, he doesn’t kill (or at least dislikes to kill). He stated that none of the owners had to die even if two preferred to die. If there’s a way, he will not shed blood. Besides, Kurapika doesn’t actually hate Neon - contrary to popular belief. There wasn’t a single manga panel that indicates his hatred for her; or even annoyance. It was only the time where Mellody mentioned that he will kill her if she stands in the way, but Kurapika, as much as mentioned before, doesn’t kill if there is an alternative way.

I have yet to fully explore possible reasons why Neon’s ability disappears from Chrollo’s book if she’s still alive (my friend thinks it’s related to Kurapika’s dolphin ability). However, there are many rebuttals to the theories on how she died.

But yeah, I think for it to be canon, Neon has to be alive. Unless... they were already canon and he sailed to the Dark Continent and she died slightly before that event (tbh I rather not have this).

2) Kurapika’s fate - he needs to live

Number 2 is a condition is if they aren’t canon yet before he sails to the Dark Continent.

One thing that confuses people is that they think that just because Kurapika is under the Kakin Employment, it means that he is no longer affiliated with the Nostrades. The Kakin Employment contract is temporary - he is still affiliated with the Nostrades (and their business is bodyguarding, take note). As for him being in the Zodiac, he is still the Nostrade Family Young Boss - being part of the Zodiacs is like some political committee.

I know there are rumours (I say rumours cause I don’t see the interview script by my own eyes) that Togashi once indicated that the Phantom Troupe and Kurapika will all die. I do think that Togashi can kill one of his main characters, but there’s one thing that makes me question whether he changed his mind: Nitro Rice from the Dark Continent.

The Nitro Rice is a thing in the Dark Continent that prolongs one’s life - a direct solution to Kurapika’s Emperor Time problem. I think if he does last until they reach the Dark Continent, he has a chance to prolong his lifespan that he has lost while using Emperor Time.

Now, if he indeed gets to survive, manages to complete his mission, there’s another problem he will face: a will to live. Because currently, all he has ever lived for is bringing justice to his clan. Beyond that, what can he live for? Which kind of makes the ending for him to happily live with someone (be it his friends or having a family) a suitable one.

3) Neon’s development

Neon is seriously misunderstood among the fandom - even her personality. I’ve seen a lot of Kurapika x (other character) ships where Neon is the 3rd party in fanfics; and it is a one-sided love.

However, Neon is actually an emotionally detached person while Kurapika is the one that gets attached to people, even if he initially avoids them. Neon has what psychologists will call “Avoidant-Dismissive Attachment Style” while Kurapika has “Avoidant-Fearful Attachment Style”. This is rightfully so due to their different backgrounds. I actually believe that between the two of them, Kurapika will be the one who falls first or if this is one-sided, Kurapika is the one that likes her because of their attachment styles.

Neon has zero friends, is materialistic and lacks sympathy for dead people (the complete opposite of Kurapika). She believes in focusing on the present and the living (it’s actually a pretty good principle to live for). She needs to learn how to be more attached to people and learn compassion - which she actually is seen as being capable of. She was surprised that Eliza broke down and cried, and even forgo bidding physically. I think this is an indication of her starting to feel sympathy for people and perhaps being more mature - cemented by the fact that she lost her powers.

Therefore, I do think she needs to learn how to warm her heart up to people (which she might have already started to after the York New incident) if she were to feel something for Kurapika.

4) Kurapika’s view of her

Okay, this is one factor that is either you take it the vanilla way or the kinky way lmao. I actually wrote a Cognitive Dissonance Theory for Kurapika on my Tumblr post for this one (will try to link it in the reblog).

Kurapika’s initial belief is that flesh collectors are scums who should be arrested, yet he is surprised to see that his flesh-collecting employer is a girl of his age. I think there is already dissonance in his mind there once he met her.

Contrary to popular belief, Kurapika doesn’t hate Neon (there’s no single manga panel that ever once showed he detest her or feel annoyed with her; as compared to other employees of hers). In fact, he does quickly understand that Neon is being exploited by her father - to which he corrects Basho about the situation. In the manga, when he woke up after the fever, he says her name (in the 2011 anime, it was “Boss” but in the manga, it’s “Neon”) and immediately asks about her; which indicates that he is concerned for her. Of course, she is his employer but in that situation where he is bedridden and not working, him asking about her won’t be just due to him working as a bodyguard.

However, this doesn’t show that he has feelings for her. It only proves that a) he doesn’t hate her, b) he does care about her. He needs to see Neon as more than just a flesh collector for him to like her; on top of spending time with one another. He needs to see (if he hasn’t already) that she is a girl his age that has a different predicament than him.

This is the vanilla way I guess.

The darker and more saucy interesting interpretation would be him thinking it’s okay to objectify her just as much as she objectifies his clan’s eyes (that’s another post I gotta do for another day - but hey, this interpretation is paralleled to Tserreidnich/Theta).

5) Spending Time with one another

I think as mentioned, it is already a given that Kurapika and Neon had spent time together under one roof off-screen while we see Gon and Killua on-screen during the 3 arcs. However, I think Neon cannot suddenly become less detached and Kurapika cannot want something more than his mission at the moment; so I do think that even if they had spent time before Dark Continent Exploration arc, Neon and Kurapika needs to spend time together after he comes back (that’s if they haven’t banged before he sailed to the Dark Continent like they did in my fic lmao).

So yeah, I think these are generally the five things that I think should happen if they were to be canon.

I don’t know why I was compelled to do a long-ass post of this, but I hope this answers your question. I can go on and write a report about this but Imma stop here for now.

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moonlightpastime · 3 years

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Hmm gonna throw Mistaken for Couple + Sleep intimacy Zakkura your way for whenever you might want to play with it. :3 (Also possibly revealing my secret identity with this prompt lol)

Oooooooo! Delicious lil combo indeed.

(also sorry. it’s me. of course this turned into basically a mini-ficlet on it’s own lol)

Hmm...okay. Imma be a basic, trope-y bich then lol. Scenario I’d probably play with in a canon-ish setting would be Cadet!Cloud and Zack kinda bumping into each a couple times- maybe brief mission overlaps or something after Modeoheim? And since they’d hit it off so quick that just continues. And of course people take notice. For one thing it’s weird for a First Class to be hanging around and all. And sure Zack’s got a reputation of being pretty chill and outgoing. What surprises the other Cadets is Cloud. Because Strife’s always been stand-offish and stuff.

So of course the rumours start flying. And there’s the mix of usual nasty ones “Sleeping with Fair to climb the ladder.” ect. But there’s also some squad-mates of Cloud’s who don’t think that’d really be the case. Maybe there’s something more genuine there- though it’s still a bad idea considering Zack’s basically one of their CO’s.

So one mission comes along and Zack kinda meets up with the tail end of this little sortie that the cadets were off training in. It runs later than they planned so they all just decide to camp it out and head back to HQ the next morning. Being the country boys they are- and with that ‘weird’ chemistry Cloud and Zack are pretty quick to get things organized and get a legit pretty cozy camp.

Only a sliiiight problem in that they don’t actually have enough space in the trooper tent. Meant for a four man squad, not five. So of course, SOLIDER Fair slings his arm around Cloud’s shoulders and says, “Then I guess this guy’s bunking with me.” since Zack’s been packing his own small tent for his mission. Cloud flails and blushes a bit. “O-oh. No I can do watch duty.”

Zack just rolls his eyes and jostles the blond. Puts on his friendly ‘commander’ voice. “We’ll do it in shifts Cadet. Just like always.” So they work out a quick schedule. Couple hours each so they can all get some rest after their busy training. Cloud’s got first shift since he ‘volunteered’. Zack takes the last one- because he’s slightly evil and loves being the one to wake up/break down camp.

Of course once they turn in, Zack isn’t really tired- always too much energy- so he wanders over to keep Cloud company. He’s sitting a way off from the camp. Away from the fire they decided to keep burning. Tends to help deter monsters anyway. Zack nudges Cloud with a knee as he comes up behind him.

“Aren’t you cold man?” He asks. Eyeing the wind tugging at the cadet’s clothes. Cloud shakes his head. Something almost wistful on his face.

“This is nothing compared to home.”

“Nibelheim right? That’s out west ain’t it?”

“Mm.”

They shoot the shit for a while, before Cloud gets a little flustered. Tells Zack he should rest since he’s waking up the earliest. And Cloud needs to focus on his job. So Zack puts on a little show of stretching and yawning- and NO. Cloud is NOT staring. He’s keeping WATCH.

Eventually Cloud gets tapped to head to bed. Hesitates for like an HOUR outside the tent. Or at least that’s how it feels like to Zack who of course isn’t sleeping. Scares the living day lights outta Cloud when he finally scoots over and tugs open the flap. Grinning up at the cadet, one eyebrow raised.

“You coming?”

Cloud shuffles in obediently, takes another age getting outta his boots, gloves combat gear. Just leave him in those baggy navy fatigues. The space is still pretty small, but Zack figures it’ll be fine. Cloud isn’t exactly a big person. (not that he says that. Out loud.).

Eventually Zack whines at him enough to get the other settled down anyway. The bedrolls really aren’t the most comfy thing, but they’d found pretty even patches of ground to set up their tents over so it could definitely be worse. Zack wiggles his closer to Cloud’s when the other very, very stubbornly won’t move himself. Logically it’ll keep them warmer and Cloud’s gotta be at least a little cold from watch right? Just makes sense. They tussle a bit, before Zack actually gets Cloud to relax again. Even crack a smile and it makes Zack’s chest feel warm. Cloud’s the first one yawning. Long, very busy day and he doesn’t have the same ridiculous energy as a SOLIDER (pointed look at Zack.) So Zack quite bugging him- as much- and they both settle in. Can hear the distant crackle of the fire and the two squadmates talking quietly outside. Thanks to his enhancements he catches little snippets of their conversation on the wind.

It surprises him a bit. Hearing people speculating him and Cloud are a ‘thing’. He shrugs it off more or less because he’s been around enough to realize Cloud’s kinda isolated. Honestly he feels bad for the people who don’t give the blond a chance. They’re missing out. Bit time, in Zack’s opinion. Cuz Cloud’s nice. And smart. And honestly just fun.

Warm too, now that the night time chill’s starting to fade from his skin. Zack snuggles up closer to soak some of it in and share his own. Habbit. Jungle kid after all. Prefers the heat to the cold any day.

He’s not really tired, not yet, still got that vague adrenaline pumping through his veins. Always kinda is. But there’s something kinda...mellowing about Cloud. Gives him something to focus on other than that constant itch to ‘get up, move, do something’. It’s nice. And pretty cute how Cloud’s hair falls in his face when he shifts. Can tell the other’s drifted off for real now. All those senseless little twitches and sounds. Used to freak Zack out a little bit when he first got enhanced. How he could catch the rhythm of someone’s heartbeat if he tried. But Cloud’s is nice.

Zack wasn’t really expecting to sleep that night. Usually has a tough time of it when he gets sent on missions that are way too easy. Takes a lot to tucker him out. But the next thing he knows he’s catching a voice. Snapping out of sleep. Something kinda soft brushing his face. Tickles a bit.

“U-uh. Sir?”

Hm. Cadet sounds weird. Almost nervous but Zack’s used to that. People act odd around him. SOLIDER status and all. Even Cloud gets kinda jumpy about it sometimes. But not as often as others.

“It’s nearly four a.m. Sir.”

“Oh right. Thanks. Go catch a few winks. We’ll be oughta here before long.”

“Sir!”

The tent closes again in a faint rush of chilly air and Zack yawns.

Gets a mouthful of hair for his efforts and sputters a bit. Blinks open and.

Oh.

Huh. Well that’d explain the extra warmth. He’s honestly not sure from the tangle their in if he’d moved in the night or if it’d been Cloud. Maybe a collaborative effort. But Cloud’s all tucked up against his front. One slender hand curled in the front of Zack’s heavy shirt. Zack’s got Cloud all wrapped up in a mix of their bedding and his arms. He’s done that since he was a kid. Grabbin’ up pillows and stuff to cuddle.

He thinks he prefers having someone to snuggle up with instead.

It’s super dark out. That weird hour before the sun starts to come up. Still enough to make out that funny little wrinkle of Cloud’s nose as the other grumbles in his sleep. Zack chuckles, leans back a bit so he doesn’t end up with another mouth of hair.

“You’re okay Spike. Get some more sleep.”

Takes a bit of careful shifting and wiggling to get them somewhat untangled. Doesn’t really succeed in keeping Cloud asleep either. Blue, blue eyes blinking open heavily. Makes a little mumble that could be Zack’s name. All confused and tired. Makes the SOLIDER chuckle again.

“At ease.” He says with a grin. Maybe a bit softer than his usual. If Cloud was like, actually awake, he’d grumble at Zack for real. Running joke with them. Started the first time Cloud thought he had to be all ‘formal’ and stuff around base. Dumbass.

They’re...friends.

...right?

#moonlight writings #prompts #asks #ficlet #final fantasy vii #ffvii #Zakkura #Cloud Strife #Zack Fair #ubububu I love these boys too much ^^"#hope this was at least SORT OF an answer to the prompt lol #thank you for the ask!

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aceofshitposts · 2 years

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Fanfic Year In Review

I was tagged by @themandylion or well my main was eeeh semantics How many works do you have on AO3? i have a WHOPPING 12 whole fics up on my ao3 account. astonishing, i know What’s your total ao3 word count? total? 24, 979 words. just this year? 12,448 How many fandoms have you written for and what are they? this year has been all about batman [finger guns] Are there any new fandoms you want to write for? eh not really atm What are your top 5 fics by kudos? Lost In The Details, May The Tide Welcome Us Home, Of Explosions and Ice Cream, A Moment's Notice, Lay No Flowers Upon My Grave Which of your fics do you want more attention for? oh man i don't know hahaha, i'm grateful for any attention and also at the same time wish to not be perceived at all or ever Do you respond to comments, why or why not? i do! or i try to anyway. like i said i'm super grateful for anyone to leave a comment on something i've written so i try to make sure people know i appreciate it! What sorts of things do you normally write? there is nothing i like to do more than poke my fingers into holes in canon and see how i can fix that. i love restructuring canon or decontextualizing it although i admit i don't post a lot of that lmao i also love working on AUs! especially ghost stories What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending? oh lord, i tend to avoid unhappy endings as much as possible but there was a kingdom hearts fic i wrote once that isn't on my ao3 :P What’s a fic that pushed you out of your comfort zone? ohh uuuh honestly i'm gonna say lay no flowers and not bcause of the content but more because i am really bad at chaptered fics because it's really difficult for me to write something long Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? i have never seriously written a crossover although i entertain the idea of them often lmao the craziest would probably be the time my friend and i went ham in our dms for vanitas (kingdom hearts) x draco (the franchise we no longer name) Have you ever had a fic translated?. i have not! Have you ever co-written a fic before? long long time ago. haven't had the opportunity to again since What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will? there's a few in my wip folder that i probably won't finish despite every intention to. noteable shout outs go out to the continuation of may the tide welcome us home and the 5+1 jaytim secret dating i keep trying to chip away at that cheetah requested 😭 What are you currently working on? a civilian jason coffee shop type au and a reverse jaytim au ;) What are your writing strengths? i consider myself pretty good at setting the atmosphere :) What are your writing weaknesses? dialogue and keeping my focus honestly lol sometimes i get really caught up in the whole 'x says y says' kind of stuff which i always feel like makes my writing feel stiff. gotta remember i can just leave it haha What was the first fandom you wrote for? Most recent? the very first? that'd be pokemon way back on the serebii forums where my writing career was almost cut short by a mod that made it her mission to criticize every young/new writer so harshly they'd never want to write again (what no i'm not bitter at all) the most recent would be batman What’s your favorite fic you’ve written? favourite?? oh goodness uh- honestly i have a big soft spot for this destiel fic i never finished haha but y'all probably want something you can actually read so hmm i think A Moment's Notice What fic are you most proud of? right now i think that'd have to go to Chart A Line since it's a gift fic and i really do like how it came out and that kiichi liked it!!

i will politely tag @heybabybird and @penumbra-twist if they want to do it :)

#astrix thoughts #thanks for the tag!!

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vailaerilgallantra · 3 years

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I can't watch live but I'm gonna be able to see the vod tomorrow so I thought I'd write a little wishlist for what I'd love to see in the finale! Obviously not everything is possible and the cast has their own wishes and directions for their characters, but I just think these are ways I'd personally love to see the character's stories wrap up! (Not including any one shot potential for the future of course).

First up; Fjord!

I mean he's gotta go see Vandran, that's a given, mans kinda been stranded somewhat on an island for a while and I think Fjord needs to tell his father figure about what he's made of himself in their time apart.

Also SABIEN!! I dont think I've said it but Fjord x Sabien frenemies to lovers to enemies where Fjord has been tracking him down?? Very good stuff. Though I can see "The Gang Invades Dark Tow... Again" as a great one shot to go find him.

Along those lines, they may combine that finding Sabien with making sure Ukotoa never gets out in one big Fjord-centric one shot

Jester;

First and foremost, we gotta see the result of leaving Marion and the Gentleman alone for a while, obviously!! And if it didnt work then maybe a second try or some extra encouragement for our sweet little tiefling.

There has to be some sort of moment with Artie. Idk what exactly but I think a sweet moment of recollection of what they've been through together would be sweet.

Start up the detective agency, they've got the potential totally!

Caleb;

In case it isn't obvious, Shadowgast endgame supporter here.

Though I would also like to see some acknowledgement of Blumentrio past because we never got any of that in the game.

A moment with Yussa because they could have had a real student and pupil type deal with Caleb overcoming the trauma of Trent with someone who seems like would actually care. We didn't really get to know Yussa much, but I have a whole internal idea of what he's like in my head lol.

And then there's the icky-thong.. Without a doubt they're going to deal with that in a one shot at some point, so I dont think much will come of it in the finale. But if it does, I imagine they'd probably go give that knowledge to the cobalt soul and it would get dealt with pretty quick since its finally a way for them to begin the destruction of the Cerberus Assembly.

Veth;

Honestly, Veth's story has been ready to end so other than the detective agency, it's just making a life with her family which is pretty much guaranteed.

Yasha;

Yasha is also pretty set for the end game because she got her best friend back already and she has a great girlfriend, so the only thing I hope for is for her to have some final send off to Zuala. Whether if that means finding her actual grave, or making a shrine to her, either works. So long as she delivers her those flowers, I'm happy.

Caduceus;

I hope Cad gets to rest. That's about it honestly, the poor lanky boy has been through a lot and he needs to go back to his introvert life at the grove. With visits to his friends of course, but his mission is done, he can retire now.

Molly;

You know still in shock we got them back tbh so I have NO clue what my wishes for him are.. Other than the gang catching him back up on what's happened and just.. I guess helping him get back to his chipper 2 year old self.

I think they all just need some family time with their lavender tiefling and then they take turns exploring the world with him.

Beau;

I've always had a hard time reading Beau and what she wants, but I think that the staples are that she wants her family safe and that she wants to get rid of corrupt bastards from the system so it can perhaps function well. So I think her continuing to work for the cobalt soul is pretty guaranteed.

But also, I would love for her to be involved with TJ and to just.. make things better for him than it was for her with that family since their father hasn't changed and I dont think their mother will step up for them ever.

Essek;

It is to nobody's surprise that I have wishes for Essek too lol.

Other than Shadowghast endgame, I just... I hope he learns to forgive himself and decides to stay with the M9. I know it's unlikely he'll completely abandon the dynasty, but I hope he does. He loves those idiots and they love him. I just want him to be happy.

#critical role #Mighty Nein #Fjord #jester lavorre #caleb widogast #veth brenatto #yasha nydoorin #caduceus clay #mollymauk tealeaf #beauregard lionett #essek thelyss #CR Final Episode #cr finale #wishlist

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atinybitofau · 4 years

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W O O Y O U N G ⟼ office au

WHERE YOU TWO WERE PAST LOVERS

a/n: my writers drought has ended bois lol

• “B-But sir.”

• “Don’t but sir me.” he wags a finger at you. “You need a vacation, y/n. I can’t have you working night and day coming in here looking like a complete trash bag.”

• you stare at him,

• at your boss in complete and utter disbelief.

• “Excuse me?”

• “Y/n.” Wooyoung shakes me in my chair, not necessarily as aggressive as he did months ago. “I’m saying this as your boss. And not as your past lover—“

• “You mean sex toy.” you correct making him roll his eyes.

• “Whatever you want to classify yourself— fine. I’m saying this so you could get some rest. You work too hard for me.”

• you raise an eyebrow at him.

• knowing Wooyoung for too long.

• you can’t believe he’s being so kind.

• after all,

• he did only use you for sex.

• “Are you sure this isn’t your subtle way of saying you need to get a good fuck and don’t want me around?”

• “Ugh.. yes?”

• Wooyoung feels bad.

• actually feels bad for being THAT guy.

• the guy that fucked you without feelings.

• no strings attached.

• but he just can’t like you like that.

• he’s only seen you as you are.

• his hot-as-fuck secretary with a rather obedient personality.

• “Wooyoung. As much as I appreciate your concern,” you jokingly smile pushing him away. “I don’t mind you finding sexual release elsewhere. I couldn’t care less. What we had is over. Plus, I’m here to work. Not to pine for your dick getting shoved down my throat.”

• he’s always found you quite enticing nonetheless.

• albeit, sometimes infuriating—

• but someone he felt comfortable talking to.

• “But still.” he leans against your desk pen in his mouth and arms crossed over his chest. “You deserve a break.”

• you sigh resting your head on the back of your chair in thought. “Maybe I do.”

• yeah maybe you do.

• work’s been a load.

• so has the overwhelming amount of papers.

• plus...

• Song Mingi has been trying to ask you on a date since last September.

• which he’s been doing for 4 months now.

• “So.. when can I start?”

• your vacation’s great.

• you think that maybe Wooyoung’s right.

• that you really did need this shit.

• how nice it felt to sleep and drink without knowing you’d have to wake up early the next morning.

• “Hey beautiful.”

• you lean against the doorframe smiling at a beaming Mingi.

• “You’re here early.”

• “Wanted to take you out for breakfast too.” he smiles as you let him in. “Did I bother you?”

• “No.” you sigh. “But I’ve gotta get these reports to Wooyoung before he has a panic attack at the office.”

• Mingi was his best friend.

• this could end bad or good honestly.

• but let’s hope Mingi doesn’t find out.

• let’s hope he doesn’t already know.

• “That’s okay. I’ll go with you. How does that sound?”

• terrible.

• “Perfect.”

• you think Mingi is too though.

• he’s such a good guy.

• not competitive and far from what Wooyoung wants from you.

• he even holds your hand the whole time on the way to work.

• talking endless amounts about his work travels.

• knowing you’d be interested.

• the employees at work seemed to be stunned by Mingi’s arrival.

• another CEO hand holding with you.

• none other than a notorious best friend of your own boss.

• “Woo, I have those reports you needed me to bring.”

• “Oh thank god, you’re here. I was about to— Mingi?”

• Wooyoung’s disheveled.

• looked like a whole trash bag without you working at your desk.

• and yeah he’s regretted ever giving you the vacation.

• wishing you’d still be his eye candy and doing half his job for him.

• “What are you doing here man? I haven’t seen you in a hot minute.”

• you look between the two.

• nerved by the sweet interaction.

• you don’t know why.

• but it felt like an ex boyfriend facing your new secret boyfriend who also happened to be his best friend.

• when that’s not even close to being the case.

• when you shouldn’t care at all what Wooyoung feels about it.

• “I’m taking y/n out on a date today. Been trying to ask her but she’s been so busy, she didn’t have the time.”

• Wooyoung stops.

• feels like hell froze over at his reply.

• ice cold.

• untamed by his jealousy.

• “W-What?”

• you hand Wooyoung the papers you need to drop off and pull Mingi away before he notices.

• not sure why he reacted like that either.

• “Um. We should go, huh, Mingi?”

• Mingi smiles at you and returns his hand in yours, eyes gazing down at you fully blasted.

• “You hungry that much?”

• you forget that Wooyoung’s even there.

• smiling at Mingi as he holds your hand.

• cause this was on the list of what you’ve been needing on a vacation.

• someone who would actually treat you like a woman and not like a toy.

• but Wooyoung’s about to combust.

• thinking he’s going to kill Song Mingi.

• and he can’t explain why just—

• can’t stand the fact another man has you wrapped around his finger like that.

• not when it should be him.

• “Why didn’t you fucking tell me Mingi’s been trying to snatch y/n all this time, San?”

• his adjacent friend who stopped by chuckles. “Hello to you too, cock sucker. What stick went up your ass that you have to yell this early in the morning?”

• he pulls at his hair, elbows on his desk when he thinks about it again. “The fact that Mingi walked into my goddamn office this morning. Hand holding my secretary for fucksake! That’s what stick got shoved up my ass. And that you and the guys have probably been planning my demise.”

• San rolls his eyes. “You’re lucky I haven’t told them about your scandalous affairs with her in the first place. What’s it matter to you anyway? You just wanted a good fuck from her, right?”

• wrong.

• but he thinks he knows San’s right for the most part.

• “Right! But that’s why. I can’t just share my sex toy.”

• San dead pans at Wooyoung.

• disgusted that his best friend was a complete idiot.

• “Has it ever occurred to you that y/n is a human being with feelings? And that she has all the right to date Mingi if she wants? And that you shouldn’t give a shit for that reason alone if that’s the one you’re gonna come up with.”

• Wooyoung’s a jackass.

• for not only using you as a sex toy.

• but for fucking around with your feelings.

• “Shit.”

• San sighs. “Yeah shit. Mingi is the last person in our group who’d ever use her the way you did. So if that’s what you’re worried about then—“

• it’s not though..

• it’s really not.

• “Would you believe me if I told you I liked her? For more than just sex. That I see her for more than just that? That I actually like talking to her, being with her 24/7. And that I don’t always want to pin her to her desk every time I see her?”

• “No.” the older shakes his head with a faint smirk. “Absolutely not. Because if I were you, instead of sitting here moping about someone else getting your girl, I would run out of here and tell her that. Change her mind about you before she actually does fall for someone else.”

• Wooyoung nods at San. “Thanks man.”

• “Go get her tiger.”

• San’s smiling like the little devil he is as Wooyoung runs out.

• shaking his head in victory.

• before texting Mingi,

• destroy-man-whore-Wooyoung is a go. I repeat, mission destroy-man-whore-Wooyoung is a go.

• “Everything alright?” you ask Mingi when he receives a text, mouth partly stuffed.

• he smirks at his phone before smiling at you. “Peachy keen, baby girl.”

• you eye him weirdly and think..

• Mingi’s been off since the office.

• staring at his phone for the past hour.

• he’s been nice and all but you can’t help but feel he’s lacking.

• like, the teasing you get from Wooyoung.

• the jokes.

• the undoubtedly horrid insults.

• you enjoyed those.

• because it made the relationship entertaining despite the intention.

• Wooyoung was just someone you felt comfortable with.

• maybe more than just a fwb or a boss.

• “Mingi, do you think I’m dateable?”

• he swings your arms from side to side, enjoying the small crowd of people as you walked back to your place.

• “Course.” he acclaims. “You’d be lucky to be anyone’s girlfriend.”

• “Is that why you’ve been trying to date me?”

• he chuckles at that with a nod. “I guess you can say that.”

• you do think Mingi’s not right for you.

• that maybe..

• you need someone with Wooyoung’s caliber to make your life as coordinated as you make his.

• as his secretary it was something you had to do.

• now it was just..

• something you want to do.

• you feel a weird ache in your chest when you think you want Wooyoung to return it.

• that not in a million years would you expect to think you wanted Wooyoung like that.

• “Mingi.. I had fun on our date and everything. But I think— OH MY GOD WOOYOUNG WHAT THE HELL?!”

• you pull at your boss’ sleeve shirt.

• in attempt to get him away from Mingi after he lands a solid punch on the side of his jaw.

• the older looking at the smaller stature man in shock.

• “Okay.” Mingi cranes his neck. “Okay pipsqueak. We get it. You don’t want me to date y/n but don’t ever fucking punch me again.”

• “Then don’t ever fucking lay a hand on her again.”

• you stare in bewilderment.

• fascinated you must admit.

• for Wooyoung’s bravery and possessiveness.

• “What the hell, Wooyoung?”

• “Shut up dumb bitch, I’m trying to be a man right now.”

• you scoff rolling your eyes and let him continue anyway.

• “Okay, now look Mingi, I don’t know if you knew this but me and y/n have been having an implicit relationship—“

• “A sexual relationship that’s clearly over.” you correct making him shove his hand over your mumbling mouth.

• “— yes our relationship and I don’t appreciate you trying to interfere. That only I will be the man to sweep y/n off her feet. Not some gentleman scumbag who’ll treat her like a princess.”

• “Ex-fucking-cuse me?”

• you gargle again when Wooyoung covers your mouth more.

• “I will do whatever it takes to be what this woman wants. Because not only do I love her but I appreciate her with every god damn muscle, fiber, cell, bone in my body and that I’ll give her anything she’ll ever ask for from here on out. So save the effort. I’ll do it for you instead.”

• you’re impressed.

• god forbid Jung Wooyoung has ever been good at the boyfriend department..

• or anything that involved actual romance.

• but you’re touched nonetheless.

• that Wooyoung wanted to do those things for you.

• after claiming you were just a pawn of his sex life.

• “Well.. I think you two definitely need some alone time to talk. And I need some ice for what you did to my jaw. So I’ll leave you to it then, Woo.”

• Mingi flashes you a hinting smile.

• watching him reach for his phone in his front pocket.

• then you realize what he’s actually been doing.

• promising yourself to thank him and whoever was involved for it later.

• “Wooyoung, what the hell was that about?”

• you taunt your boss.

• in the most subtle way possible.

• because he’s someone that you’d spend the rest of your life with.

• as his employee.

• as a fwb.

• as a friend and anything more.

• his girlfriend?

• “You just get me.” Wooyoung completes his thoughts, hand loosely dropping onto your shoulders. “God, y/n. Knowing you would be with another man.. was scary. I thought that it was the sex I liked. That you were so hot and comfortable that I thought that was it. How the hell am I supposed to know I’d fall in love with you?”

• you stare at him.

• lust ridden and tongue tied.

• wondering why you hadn’t realized the same thing.

• “Maybe because you’ve only ever wanted one thing in your life. Sex.”

• “You right.” he agrees with a sigh. “But now that it’s passed, I want something else.”

• you giggle letting him slowly push you into your house, kicking the door closed behind you.

• “Don’t get cheesy on me, Woo.”

• “Just this once, hear me out.”

• you’re breathless as he pins you against the door,

• his hands curling around your waist for the first time in months after you two stopped being lovers.

• face perfectly carved into yours.

• like two pieces of completely different puzzles.

• miraculously fitting together like you two were made for each other.

• “I want you, y/n. Not just for the sex anymore. But for everything you’ve got. Teach me how to love.”

• “You think you could learn that from me?” you playfully cringe, lips playing against his like a fiddle. “Something you could only learn on your own?”

• “Maybe you can’t teach me.” he whispers as he molds his lips with yours. “But you could still try.”

• “I thought this was supposed to be my vacation, Wooyoung?”

• “Okay then.” he hums against your lips in approval. “Let’s make this less work and more pleasure.”

• “I like the sound of that.”

@atinybitofau

here me out, it’s actually a good song okay lol. believe me!

#wooyoung #jung wooyoung #ateez wooyoung #ateez #ateez preferences #ateez reactions #ateez scenarios #ateez imagines #ateez oneshot #wooyoung reaction #wooyoung scenarios #wooyoung imagines #wooyoung oneshot #wooyoung au #ateez au #office au #requested

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kkysolo · 4 years

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Stuck on You / Chapter One

You curse him for it, sometimes. Loathe him for it - for how he’s made you, his parents, his friends feel. How he’s broken them. Reduced all of you to nothing but fickle fragments that pass through time and space with little awareness, with little recognition, of what’s happening to them. At least, that’s how you feel. But the bitterness, the fury - it doesn’t last long. It never does.

Prologue

Pairing: Ben Solo|Kylo Ren/Reader Setting: Alternate Universe - Cyberpunk, dystopia, modern, gangs. Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence, war, gang violence, emotional hurt/angst, codependent relationships (eventual fluff, smut, romance).

A/N: Tense change from past to present because we’re shifting into the present timeline of the story. Also, if you’ve read any of my other work, you’ll know I tend to write in second person omniscient. I love a bit of head-hopping, keeps us on our toes, lol. It won’t appear in this chapter, but bear it in mind for the future.

Chapter under the cut, and also here, on AO3.

Summary: The year is 2084.

Despite its advances, society has collapsed on itself. The world is crooked, damaged, dying. Rezoned into new territories, separating the elite from the unworthy. Civilization is crumbling at your very feet, and in the midst of it all, your best friend, Ben Solo, has been missing for three years. You desperately cling to what’s left of him, hoping that he’ll come home, praying that things will fall back into place.

And then he does. And they don’t. Because life is different when you’re a scoundrel in the midst of a class war.

Now: 2084, Spring

You’ve always hated spring.

They used to call it the season of new beginnings, and new beginnings were good. But that was before. Now, starting over is nothing more than an expected, quotidian task each time the Empire rezones the land. Which is often. Too often to ever feel at home. Too often to ever really feel as though there’s a new beginning to be had.

“It was the right thing to do, you know,” Rose smiles sympathetically in that way that she does, the kind of way that doesn’t make you feel pitied, but loved. “Hm?” “Breaking up with Jon.” “Oh,” you hadn’t actually given the situation much thought. He’d already retreated the back of your mind, an unimportant speck among an ocean of stress. “Yeah, I know.” “Because you didn’t love him.” “I know.” “Because you love Ben.” “Rose,” you hiss, your head flying around the dimly lit room. Because that’s all it is, really - a room. They’d outlawed bars (at least, in the rezoned areas) six months ago. Your shabby little makeshift basement bar - ran by Ben’s mother, nonetheless - was an illegal, yet necessary sanctuary. “Would you stop? Someone will hear.”

“Oh, stop,” she scoffs, taking a sip of highly illegal (and cherished) gin and lemonade. “As if everyone here doesn’t already know.”

“Well it doesn’t matter now, does it?” you mumble, twirling a bottle of beer between your hands. It’s a good one, not badly brewed and watered down. Leia, she gets the good stuff. How she gets it, you aren’t sure. “It’s not like he’s around.” “He’s not dead,” Rose affirms. “He can’t be.” “What makes you say that?”

Because you believe it, too, you do. He can’t be dead - couldn’t possibly be gone. Because Ben, he’s strong. He’s good and he’s kind and he’s funny and brave and men like him don’t just die unknowingly. Men like him go down in glory - of that, you’re sure.

“Because it’s Ben,” she shrugs. “He’s supposed to be running this place one day.”

You nod, still dragging your bottle across the uneven wood of the table.

“It’ll be awkward, though,” you sigh. “With Jon.” “You think so?” “I mean, yeah,” you lean back in your seat. “He’s still with the Resistance, I’m gonna have to see him all the time.” “Yeah, I mean, maybe missions will be awkward but,” she shrugs. “He’s not an idiot, surely he knows to, you know. Stay away.”

You hum in agreement, taking a swig from your bottle. Ben would like this beer, you think. It’s bitter, like he likes.

“Sweetheart,” Leia is behind you now, a gentle hand on your shoulder. “Could I ask a favour?” “Of course.” “Could you watch the place for me tonight?” She has that apologetic expression on her face she so often bears, and it pains you to think of her worrying to ask you something. “Han is home from his mission tonight, and I’d just love to see him, honey.” “Leia, of course,” you place your hand atop hers. “You deserve all the time together you can get.”

And they do. They’d separated for several months after Ben’s disappearance, neither of them able to cope with the weight of it in a manner that allowed them any semblance of intimacy, any notion of peace. But they’d rekindled as much as they could of their relationship, and despite Han’s long missions, continued to work on it.

“Thank you, honey,” she smiles softly, squeezing your hand before turning to a demanding patron. She gives so much of herself to so many people, you wonder how there’s any of her left.

When Leia finally bids you farewell, you’re already shuffling around behind the badly crafted bar, held together precariously by planks and rusted nails. You’re not sure who built it - though you expect it may have been Poe - but you’re surprised it’s still standing after only one week of use. You pull another bottle of gin from a box on the concrete floor, and you scoff at the icy feel of it. The wicked cold from the exposed ground has kept it remarkably cool. You hope you’ll be able to shut the refrigerator off, in that case. It’s far too expensive to run.

“Here,” you pour Rose another glass. She sits at the bar now, resting her chin in her palm. “Perk up a little, you’ve gotta keep me company.”

Rose sticks her tongue out playfully.

“Did you get settled in your new place?” She speaks into her glass and the sound of her voice vibrates through the liquid.

“Mhm,” You sigh, pouring a drink for yourself. It’s your second move of the year already - the Empire having pushed you out of every zone you’ve ever called home. When they come, ships and tie-fighters blackening the sky above you, you’re herded like goats to whatever new (and smaller) zone they deem suitable for nuisances such as you. For peasants such as you. “You?”

“Meh,” she shrugs. “I wish they kept me with you this time. I hate being by myself.” “Me too,” you murmur. And you do. You really do. “But it is what it is.”

You glance to your left, eyeing the stacks upon stacks of boxes that pile up against the wall. All labelled ‘bottles’, ‘glasses’, ‘coasters’ in Finn’s terrible handwriting. There’s one that sits at the bottom, labelled only ‘our stuff’. Back in the old bar - the real bar - you’d had CD players (the old kind, from decades ago - you couldn’t afford anything else). You’d had string lights and flowers and Sabacc tables. You’d decorated the walls with photos - of you, of Ben, of the resistance. Of the people who owned and worked at the only establishment for fucking miles that conceived any happiness. And it was beautiful. It was perfect.

“When’s Poe back?” Rose hums. “I think he’s coming back with Han tonight,” She takes a sip of her drink. “Why?” “I really wish he’d move those fuckin’ boxes,” you grit. “Hide them in the back or something, but I can’t stand the sight of them.”

Rose nods sympathetically.

“He will,” She turns, then, as the sound of rain pummels against the ground outside. Though it’s a basement, there’s still windows, the kind that sit more toward the ceiling, the kind that are awfully awkward to open. She squints at them, and your eyes catch how she leans closer to get a better look.

“You alright?” You lean toward her, resting your elbows against the bar. You can hear how it creaks with the pressure. “Y-yeah I just,” she drags her eyes away, bringing her attention back to you. “I just thought I saw someone outside.” “There’s lots of people outside,” you smile. “There always is.” “No, I know, but they were like…” She looks back to the window. “They were crouching, looking in.”

You sigh.

“Hopefully not an inspector for the Empire,” Rose turns back to you as you speak, and you smirk at her reassuringly. “That Armitage Hux prick has always had it out for me.”

She laughs in that airy kind of way that she does, the kind of way that makes you bubble with gratitude - because you know her. You’re fortuitous enough, privileged enough to be around such a light, such an ethereal soul. You often wonder what you ever would have done without her. You often wonder if you’d have survived it - survived this, survived the loss of him, without her.

“Maybe if you wouldn’t rile him up, he wouldn’t hate you so much.” “But it’s just so much fun to piss him off,” You grin. “He gets so flustered.”

You stay like that, laughing together, until well after midnight. You’re glad for it, the distraction. You need it, even now. Even after all this time. Being alone - with your thoughts, with the gaping hole that sits inside your chest - doesn’t get any easier. They say time heals all wounds. You wish it would. It’s only made yours worse, only further infected it with spores of him, that burst and spread the ache right down into your bones. You curse him for it, sometimes. Loathe him for it - for how he’s made you, his parents, his friends feel. How he’s broken them. Reduced all of you to nothing but fickle fragments that pass through time and space with little awareness, with little recognition, of what’s happening to them. At least, that’s how you feel. But the bitterness, the fury - it doesn’t last long. It never does.

When you trudge inside your new apartment (though new doesn’t seem very apt, perhaps crumbling would fit better), you feel him. He’s never been there, of course, but you feel him nonetheless. You feel him everywhere. In everything. And it haunts you - he haunts you. And he has no right to, because you know he’s not dead, he can’t be.

You run through your nightly routine, finally readying yourself for slumber. You hope you’ll see him there, when you close your eyes and drift from hell into harmony. You hope you’ll find him nestled in the crevices of your subconscious. Because you know he’s there. He’s always there. And when you unlock your front door, when you prop open the windows before crawling under the sheets - you hope he’ll find you here, too. Nestled under the covers, waiting for him.

And when you fall into deep sleep, into a dream - or a memory - of long ago, a dream of smiles and laughter and his honey-brown eyes, you don’t hear the door as it creaks and clicks open. You don’t hear the windows as they fall shut, the frigid breeze no longer assaulting the room. You don’t hear the footsteps, nor do you hear the breathing - panicked, rushed.

When you’re asleep, you find him. And when you’re asleep, he finds you.

#can you tell that i just REALLY fucking love rose tico #i literally would sell my soul to be her best friend lol #anyways #moving along #my writing #stuck on you #ben solo x reader #ben solo x you #kylo ren x reader #kylo ren x you #ben solo #kylo ren

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