Tumgik
#i hope you all can read the different colours
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SSOL, Bojan, and wishful thinking
aka thoughts on Sunny Side of London and a different view than what the band paints it as - a long ramble that resembles an analysis.
So SSOL has been described by the band as a song that captures and describes their concerts, and that the Sunny Side of London is not a real, physical space and rather something that represents their fandom as well as their concerts. Thus it is seen as a fun upbeat song, meant to raise your mood and feel included in something - to feel as if you are part of something fun. I, however, have a different interpretation of the lyrics.
Since London is known for its bad weather and rain, the title Sunny Side of London feels like it is referencing something that doesn't exist. Something you dream of and wish for, but don't actually have. In this regard, the lyrics are wishful. The lyrics wish for a place in which everyone can be as free as a dove, in which your money, sexuality, gender, skin colour or religion don't matter. Wishing for equality and for a place in which all that matters is your happiness and love for others. Looking at this from the perspective of a wishful dream, the lyrics turn sombre, as if painfully aware that this is not real and the place they yearn for does not exist. The lyrics wish for a sunny London and a beautiful day. But only wish, because it is not real, and is impossible to achieve. Or, like a sunny day in London, could be achieved for just small moments before it's all gone again, and what's left is a depressing and unaccepting place,in which you are not free. A representation of reality.
Additionally, the lyrics are often read and understood as being about the audience the band has - the fans that come to their shows. However, I think that the lyrics are about Bojan himself, much like Barve Oceana is written about himself. In 2021, Bojan said that during their concerts he is free as a bird because he is surrounded by friends who know him well, so he doesn't have to be ashamed of anything. This correlates to the lyrics of SSOL that are about hugging your best friend, being as free as a dove, and nothing except happiness and love mattering. In the same interview he said that when he is on stage he never feels like he doesn't belong or that he doesn't know what he is doing there. That is to say, the stage was a safe place for him - his own sunny side of London.
When looking at the recently shared image of the early version of SSOL lyrics, it seems like Bojan himself is even more present in the song than in the final lyrics. Overall, these lyrics are more personal to the band. The earlier version uses a lot of 'we' and 'us', while the published lyrics only use 'you'. This shows that while the finished song is aimed toward the listener, the first versions also included the band itself in the people who were at the sunny side of London. With lines like "It's a place for people like me and you / So if you feel like joining us too" it is clear that this is Bojan himself speaking, and he is also looking for the sunny side of London.
This takes a more depressing turn when considering when the lyrics were written. The song was written in August of 2023, less than a month after the concert during which Bojan suffered a panic attack. He has later said that since the incident the stage hasn't felt as comfortable to him, and that he has lost his safe space. Paired with the idea of the sunny side of London being something unreachable and wishful thinking, it seems as if the lyrics are mourning the loss of the safe space Bojan had. The lyrics are hopeful, aggressively so, as if trying to find a place of freedom while knowing that it is just a dream, and that the reality is much harsher. It seems like Bojan was trying to dream up a place in which he would feel safe and accepted, since in reality he had lost that.
In conclusion, reading the lyrics of the song as if the sunny side of London was something that didn't exist, the lyrics seem depressing, as if knowing such a good and accepting place could never exist. It also reveals Bojan's struggle with trying to feel comfortable on a stage again, since the lyrics seem to be for (if not about) himself.
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kokomyass · 4 hours
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JJK Characters ☆ That time of the month...
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JJK x Fem!Reader
Genre: ☁️
Trigger warnings ⚠️: swearing, crack
featuring: Gojo Satoru, Nanami Kento, Geto Suguru, Toji Fushiguro, Choso Kamo, Ryomen Sukuna
synopsis: in which, the jjk men are out buying you supplies for your period, some with more experience that others....
notes!: in sukuna's part, he is true form and has like a kinda palace thing going on yk....
a/n: thought of this idea, liked it and wrote it!!! I hope you enjoy 💜🍇💜🍇
~•☆•~~•☆•~~•☆•~~•☆•~~•☆•~~•☆•~~•☆•~
Gojo
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"Heyyy babe....so about those pads you wanted me to buy....you kinda failed to tell me that there are pads for every colour of the fucking rainbow!"
You had to use all your will power in you to not start laughing at Satoru through the phone, which would consequently lead him to hold a grudge.
"Satoru, I told you to get the ultra maxi pads with wings, remember? How difficult is that?" you nagged as you heard a frustrated groan through the phone.
"Well which colour is that? Cause there's no way I'm reading allat-"
"Gojo!!" you didn't usually call him by his first name it was an easy way to show your annoyance.
"Okay sorry!! Well, Y/N, there are like 5 different ultra maxi pads! How the hell am I meant to know which-"
"Satoru, with wings."
You heard the line go silent as you heard rustling assuming he had picked the pad up.
"So...um I found it....I'm gonna get myself out of this aisle because thanks to you I embarrassed myself in front of all these experienced women."
All you can do is giggle at Gojo's dramatic ass.
Nanami
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You hear the door to your house open as you lay in bed curled over from the pain your cramps are giving you.
You hear your husbands soft footstep approach your bed as you open your eyes slightly to see him bent over cupping your face careful not to wake you up to violently.
"Hello sweetheart, how are you feeling?" you hear his deep, smooth voice whisper out.
"Well...I feel like shit, but now that your here I wanna cuddle with you. It'll make me feel better."
Nanami chuckles as he sat on the bed, extending his arm out to let you cuddle with him.
"Just to let you know, I went out to buy some night and day pads, tampons just in case your in the mood to use them and your favourite snacks to keep you going. They are all here if you need." Nanami said, as he gently brushed your hair as he felt you squeeze tighter.
Nanami looked down as he heard sniffling later realising you were crying after looking down at your face.
"Honey what's wrong? Did I miss something?" Nanami's heart dropped.
"No, the absolute opposite. You always get everything right. Nanami, have I ever told you how madly I am in love with you?"
"Frequently."
Geto
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You had sent Geto out to do some period shopping and by that you meant shopping for pads/tampons and snacks.
When you were on your period, you were EXTREMELY snappy and emotional. This time of the month was one Geto feared all the time. One small thing could make you flip out.
"Hey babe! I'm home!"
You were sat on the couch wrapped in blankets as you watched TV.
"I got your stuff babe, snacks, pads and all..." Geto placed a kiss on your head before sitting next you. You took the bag from him searching for your favourite sweets.
"Thank yo-...Where are my skittles, Geto?"
Geto's heart dropped. He had completely forgotten to buy that and he regretted his life choices, but it was too late because you had already started crying.
"Ughh, I really wanted those skittles...why do you always forget Geto!" you sobbed angrily as Geto pulled you apologising profusely.
"I'll go out and buy more baby....I'm sorry...."
"NO. I WON'T WANT THEM ANYMORE!" you shouted at Geto as you stood up angrily walking to you bedroom as Geto sighed letting his head fall back on the couch, choosing to let you come to him in your own time.
Time Skip
You had guiltily shuffled out of the bedroom and sat next to Geto leaning into him as he let out a sigh of relief.
"So, you feeling better??"
"Yeah, sorry babe....I overreacted. My favourite sweet isn't even skittles..."
Toji
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"So babe, what size is your pussy again?"
Toji was a man with no shame and clearly no brain. He went out to get pads for you forgetting to ask what type you needed.
"Wh- Toji!! How many people are in that aisle!?" You heard Toji chuckle at your very valid question, given what he had just said.
"Princess, listen, that doesn't matter right now. Just tell me your fucking pussy size."
Before you could scold Toji and maybe educate him you heard another woman's voice through the phone.
"Um sir, just to let you know you are rather loud...and pad sizes are based on the amount of flow not-"
"Did I ask?" Toji spat.
The woman's mouth shut as she spluttered trying to say something back before Toji diverted his attention back to you.
"There is like ultra large....do you want that cause I know how big-"
"Toji don't you dare finish that sentence. Just get me large ones please...and for the record it is based on your flow, so you had no right shut that poor woman down like that."
"I call it what I want to call it, and that's pussy size."
Choso
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You currently had a stuttering Choso on the phone who was clearly pretending he wasn't embarrassed.
You had sent him out to get some snacks, hinting that it was your time of the month but you didn't ask him to get pads or tampons fearing it would be too much for him to handle.
"So....um...Y/N, do you....erm do you want me-"
"Choso, baby, please spit it out." you giggled at how flustered he was as it wasn't a common occurrence.
"Do you need...pads...?" he whispered the last bit so you could barely hear.
"What was that?"
"...pads...." you had made out that he said pads.
You let out a loud laughter that could be heard through the phone, shown by the fact Choso was hushing you.
"Y/N, stop laughing! Yes or no? If yes, what type?" you could tell he was trying to be vague.
"Choso you are so cute, yes I would like some please can I have some night pads? I have enough days ones."
"Okay! I got this....okay see you and love you!!" he cut the phone after chanting to himself that he had the power to pick one product off an aisle.
All you could do was chuckle and feel warm at how much he cared for you...even if it was embarrassing for him....
Sukuna
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You were giving Sukuna his daily massage in his throne room despite your cramps from your period. You didn't want to tell Sukuna that you were on your period because whenever you did he became a bit too overprotective in a murderous way....
However the cramps were unbearable.
"My Lord...May I be seated?" Sukuna's head whipped around and looked up and down your body before nodding slightly, tapping his leg indicating for you to sit there.
You sat down on Sukuna's crossed legs resting your head on his broad chest as you sighed squinting your eyes at the pain.
Two of Sukuna's arms were wrapped around your waist whilst the other two were on the floor. He tighten his grip on your waist as if he knew you were experiencing pain.
Suddenly a sharp knock was heard at the door.
"You may enter." Sukuna's gruff voice sounded out.
"I have the pads and tampons and foods you requested, Lord Sukuna." Uraume entered with a box placing them at your feet. Leaving promptly.
"It is your time of the month, is it not?"
You eyes widened as you looked back at him to see him looking down at you.
"Y-Yes my lord...how did you know?"
"I keep track in my own manner." you didn't even bother to ask how that was.
You knew Sukuna wasn't exactly the loving type, but you couldn't help but wrap your arms around his neck.
"Thank you, my Lord!" he places one of his hands on your back not saying a word just letting out a huff. After a while he mumbles out.
"It's alright woman...."
~•☆•~~•☆•~~•☆•~~•☆•~~•☆•~~•☆•~~•☆•~
a/n: I hope that was good and all those true form sukuna fans out there hmu 😜
love you!! 🍇💜🍇💜
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sultrybaby · 13 hours
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[TRAILER] A memoir of love lost [P.S.H]
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summary🦢 In which a cluster of old letters stand as the only testament of sunghoon's love for you, from birth to (quite literally) death.
genre 🦢 romance, angst, some fluff
pairing (s) 🦢 sunghoon x reader | reader x unnamed background character
warnings 🦢 main character death, MAJOR ANGST obviously, not exactly forbidden love but more unfortunate circumstances, domestic abuse, mentions of bleeding and punching (most of the above don't feature in this trailer, but in the actual fic)
w/c 🦢 approx. 500
a/n 🎀 I have read over this like 100 times because it's been so long since I posted smth serious. If there is actually some kind of typo here that I just missed I'm going to cry. Also based on the reception for this trailer ig I'll decide whether to continue this (I'm so close just some edits) or just stick to headcannons (I HAVE SO MANY GUYSSSSS) or maybe I'll do both??? 👀 Anyway I hope the trailer gets yall a bit excited heehee esp yall angst lvrs heehee luv u cutie wooties <3333
-🎀🦢🎀-
"So apparently, this house belonged to a young bachelor once," explained Mary to her all-too-curious daughter eveline, who sat wide-eyed like a little lamb on the floor of the new house the family had just moved into.
'Really?"
"Yes, baby," Mary chuckled, running her fingers through eveline's (or evie, as they lovingly called her) hair to brush the strands away from her face.
"Where is he now?"
"Oh I don't know sweetheart," Mary sighed, lightly amused at the disappointment on evie's face.
"But maybe there are some clues around the house! If you ever get the time,  you should explore. Who knows, you might find something…"
Evie's eyes twinkled in excitement at the prospect of having an adventure in this foreign pile of bricks that she now had to learn to call home. Perhaps this will create a sense of oneship with the house.
Determined to uncover the secrets of the mysterious young bachelor, little evie started on her mission to unearth every corner of the building. After toppling boxes, crawling through crevices, and occasionally bumping her head on random walls, evie finally uncovered a rather absurd looking block.
And that is the story of how Mary was gifted this curious looking box by her exhausted daughter, waddling excitedly to show her the discovery.
The box had an old-fashioned grace to it. It was clearly disintegrating; cheap, fading, yellowed white  paint hung off the corners, all dried up, waiting to be chipped off. It seemed as if there was some kind of locking mechanism in the front of the box which has long been broken. All it took was a simple motion for the mouth of the box to open wide, revealing a neatly stacked set of what one could assume were letters.
The first letter was different to the others. While the rest were prettily folded, this one had a texture much more rough- as if it had been crushed and then straightened again. And on it, in extremely feathery ink, was written,
Dear ____,
You are the sun and the stars and the rose and the beautiful sky. You are made of the serenity of heaven and the tempting evil of hell. You are everything created to be beautiful, and you also make anything beautiful by association. Every day and every night, in light, in darkness, in life, and even now in death, you make me realize why Orpheus would go to the deadly underworld just to get Eurydice back. I understand his pain and longing.
I know we parted ways hurtfully and there is no action I regret more. And in my attempt to tell myself I hated you, I failed in my life's purpose- to truly let you know how much I loved you.
This is a memoir of the love I lost, a love that was but a bubble in air- shining briefly with all the most beautiful colours, then popping abruptly. And this is just an attempt at preserving some of that wonder and beauty so that when my heart aches a bit too much, I can cry to the essence of your soul (which is funny, because you are too much, too great, to be put into words).
Lovingly,
Yours yesterday, today, and forevermore,
Park Sunghoon.
A love story- a tragic one, was etched in the letters following. In that little white box was the history of Park Sunghoon's love for this mysterious woman to whom he had devoted his heart entirely.
And so Mary started reading…
-🎀🦢🎀-
Tagsies <3
@gloomysunny @thomas-the-tank-engene @goldenhypen
@soobin-chois @one16core
@annoyingbitch83
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chaotickimchi · 23 hours
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Killing Your Darlings - A guide on writing death
(Inspired by some writing tips I saw on pinterest. I decided to try my hand at a “writing death” guide. Small disclaimer, these are suggestions or things to consider, there is no rule book on writing death and your story/characters will ultimately play a role in the shape and shades you colour in your scenes with.)
SHOW DON’T TELL?
How does your character discover the death? Is it really necessary to show the body to the audience? 
Consider this, which will have more impact on your character, watching someone die or getting a phone call and hearing the news from afar? Depending on your story, it could be more gutwrenching if your character isn’t there to say their final goodbye. Sometimes not showing the body can be more devastating. Don’t underestimate your readers empathy and imagination, if your characters have a very strong bond, severing that tie from a distance can be incredibly impactful. Just because your character dies, doesn’t mean you have to show the body. If that’s the case for you, then you don’t have to worry about describing the “death scene” at all. 
WHAT’S IN A NAME?
Writing a murder mystery or a battle? Well, I suppose your character will see a lot of shit, time to describe the Dead Darling. 
Corpse. Cadaver. Body. Remains. Carcass. The Deceased. 
Several words refer to a dead body and they aren’t all created equally! You wouldn’t call your character’s dear old granny a “carcass” for example, and how many of us use the term “cadaver” to describe human remains in a casual setting? Consider the context, who is speaking, what is their relation to the Dead Darling? The use of a particular noun can change the weight and mood of the scene, there’s a reason your local funeral director doesn’t go around saying “CARCASS” to grieving widows/widowers, it sounds harsh and nasty. Maybe your character is in denial and doesn’t even describe the Dead Darling as “dead”, instead they view them as “like a doll” or “impossibly still” or looking like they’re asleep. 
Context matters, so consider the relationship between the Dead Darling and the character and also the situation they are in. Take the following as a rough example; 
Detective Mc Dude has been called to a scene, he’s given a rough description of the victim over the radio as he drives to the scene. He arrives and to his horror, he recognises the body as that of his secret lover. His colleague joins him and fills him in as Detective Mc Dude tries to gather himself.  “Detective, the remains were found this morning by a jogger. We’ve yet to make an I.D …” Detective Mc Dude’s mind is reeling as he wrestles against his inner turmoil and the need to maintain his composure and act professionally. Later, he goes to the coroner to discuss the autopsy results. The coroner describes the injuries they have discovered on the corpse. Detective Mc Dude begins to build his case. 
While the example lacks a lot of detail and flourish, I do hope it helps illustrate how the weight shifts around with the use of different nouns throughout the example. The coroner in this example feels no attachment to the Dead Darling, this is their job, they see a corpse and try to gather evidence. Detective Mc Dude recognises her body, whereas his colleague sees the remains. Do you see the difference there? Mc Dude sees the person, her body, his colleague doesn’t know who she is or what her story is, he has less connection to her and he sees the remains, it feels more distant and impersonal compared to Mc Dude. 
This might be a bit of a head scratcher, the differences are very subtle but can become really pronounced when weilded well in a scene. My advice is to pay attention to discussions of death in real life or books/tv/films etc. Read your paragraphs out loud and see how they feel, sometimes you can intuit what fits and what doesn’t. You may notice things that surprise you, for example, news readers often say “a body has been found” or “the remains of a man/woman were found”, whereas you and your friends/family are more likely to describe a deceased loved one with “his or her body”. 
A detail as small as using personal pronouns can carry significant weight, likewise, the type of language used can convey a lot of emotion. His/her body can be used to create a sense of closeness or sympathy, corpse can suggest a clinical or distant view, carcass or remains could indicate a hint of barbarism or malice. That's not to say that “corpse” can’t be used sympathetically or that “body” can’t be used to convey malice, it’s worth experimenting with which types of nouns you want to use. 
YOU LOOK LIKE DEATH WARMED UP- OH WAIT
Death comes in many shapes, sizes, colours, smells, and forms. A character sitting at someones sickbed watching them fade away will have a completely different vibe from Detective Mc Dude discovering a stomach-churning murder scene. Unless the dead body randomly falls out of the sky, chances are your character might notice some context clues or details in the environment before we get to the body. This could be anything from the beeps of machines and the sterile hospital smell, or maybe there’s a blood trail on the floor and the sweet stench of death clings to the air. It’s rather likely you’ll set up a scene before you zoom in on the finer details of the body, what kind of things would catch your character's attention? 
Now your character has come across a body… What do they see? The glassy dead-eyed stare, mouth twisted in a painful grimmace, the massive gaping chest hole where the facehugger popped out- Wow, that escalated quickly… 
Think for a second, what might your character notice first; look of terror in the victims eyes or THE MASSIVE FUCKING WOUND IN HIS CHEST… I know, the blue lips and glassy eyes might feel like a great place to start, but I’m willing to bet a massive pool of blood would catch your character's attention first, they’d probably have to get closer to see the look of terror in their eyes! Consider the larger details if your character is further away and hone in on the finer details if/when they are closer.
Not all deaths are quite so … gruesome. Maybe someone died peacefully, closed their eyes, smiled, and slipped away in a dream. Describing the “look of death” doesn’t have to be all that far removed from how you write regular emotions and expressions, except in death these expressions get locked in or frozen in time. A dead body isn’t all that different from a living one when you think about it, so why would you reinvent the descriptive wheel? A living or a dead body could “wear a painful grimace,” let your character read whatever expressions they can uncover when they find the Dead Darling. 
Smells, sounds and other sensations. You don’t have to go ham with descriptions, sometimes less is more, it really is down to you, but another thing you might want to consider are the smells, and sounds going on around them. Maybe your character disassociates a little and you forgo the visual stimuli entirely and need to express death using other senses, maybe it happens in a very dark room, or maybe you just want to draw in other descriptive elements into your death scene. 
Sounds: Siren blaring and alarms bleeping, the faintest little ‘huff’ as they draw their final breath, the ominous death-rattle cough, piercing shrieks suddenly cut short, a gutwrenching crunch-squelch, the click of a switch and the poignant silence of the life support machine ceasing. 
Smells: bleach/disinfectant, latex gloves, blood/gore, rot and decay, sickly-sweet or vomit-inducing, smog/smoke and fire, the smell of the Dead Darlings perfume, the environment (e.g. outside perhaps the smell of death is swept away by the powerful salty-sea spray or masked by the stink of the sewer the body was dumped in…)
CONCLUSIONS
There’s still a lot to explore, but I hope this has given you some food for thought when considering death in your stories. There’s more to explore, such as what happens after death (funerals, burials, anniversaries), writing scenes where your character murders/is murdered, the various ways characters can die… Faking character deaths … like there is a WHOLE LOT but this just covers a few things I find helpful to consider or at least think about when I read/write stories or generally listen to how language works around me. 
Good luck killing you Darlings ;)
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delicatebluebirdruins · 11 months
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the Devil is in the Details
in inventory: email From: Mia Winters Sent: July 18, 2017 11:04PM Tuesday To: Ethan Winters Dulvey, Louisiana. Baker farm. Come get me.
simple to the point almost as if the sender was worried to much might alert Ethan to some thing. I know the common thoughts is Mia did actually send this but my main thought is when? as she is in the cell has been since late 2015 and the doors are locked
Jacks diary: rec room. for timelines sake these are Oct 2014
October 2 Reports say a storm's coming. I had a lot of trouble cleaning up after the last one a few years back. I guess it's time to reinforce the windows and shore up the roof. Maybe I'll get Lucas to help.
October 9 The water has finally receded. The house is alright, but the old house was badly damaged. Lucas is making a fuss about a huge ship that's washed up in the bayou. If that's true, I better report it to the parish. I'll go check it out tomorrow.
Travis memo: drawer in safe room
Dear Courtney, Those bastards are looking for me, but maybe this gives you a chance to escape. To escape, you have to find the reliefs shaped like dog heads. I saw one of the heads in the dissection room underground. Get it. It's the key out of here. Something's wrong with me. It must have been that shit they made me eat. If I'm gonna die, I'd at least like to go out fighting. I'm gonna get a hold of that shotgun I saw in the rec room and make them regret what they did to me. You need to get out of here. I love you, Courtney. Love, Travis
a guy doing his best to help his love get away (this is the guy who Jack mentions in the memo we also find in the rec room who caused the stronger shotgun to be broken)
how to unlock the door in the morgue
Lucas, I caught the guy who keeps trying to escape. I've locked him up in the leftmost incinerator so he can't get away again. Take him out when he's ready. You know how to open the door, don't you? Just remember: 3 a's and a handprint. Do what you want with his girl.
this is Travis this is what happens to him. My main problem is what happened to Courtney? the least thing is her turning into Molded but it takes a time
Mrs Baker: locked room attached to the rec room
How have you been feeling recently? It's been a long time since you came in for your last check-up. I'm writing to tell you that I've finished examining your X-rays. Those dark areas in your cranium are fungus-like structures that seem to be related to mold. The hallucinations and noises you said you've been hearing may be related to these growths. If your symptoms are due to a fungal parasite, it must be removed before it's too late. I don't mean to scare you, but I am seriously concerned for your health. Please come to the hospital as soon as you read this letter. As your doctor, I strongly recommend you undergo further tests. Crawford Lang, Dulvey General Hospital
But I find that fungus like structures bit interesting I can't remember who thought about it playing RE4R and what Ramon was doing but this is for them.
Zoe's notes: trailer
My body's feeling weirder and weirder. Soon I'll become like mom and dad. It's all her fault. Should I run? No, I can't. I'm dead if she finds out. That woman she was with, Mia, She knows something. If I had the serum I could cure myself. I have to find out more.
I wonder when this was written. I think its around the time Mia got locked up (because having a talk with someone violent can be a bit difficult) and I wonder if this was the cataylist for them trying to help people (I doubt it was Zoe doing it on her own. She still had to learn how to combine the d series arm and head to get the basic serum)
Margurites warning Old House bird door
Zoe, You tried to sneak up to the second floor again, didn't you?! Did you think I wouldn't notice?!?! Even after what happened to Eveline, you just keep talking about some strange medicine. And what are you planning to do with my altar? You better keep those sticky fingers off of it! Nobody touches my sacred altar! You think your father and I are idiots?! You spoiled pathetic child…. I wish youd NevEr been born. UnforGIVably pathetic yet always lookingDOWN on uS aNd trying to Leave our HOME! After EVERYthing WE'VE done for YOU… Pathetic PATHETICpathetic pathetic… If you EVER even touch my altar I'll slice off your chest and serve it up as potroast…
first the idea of Zoe trying to reach through to her parents but Evies control was too much for them
second these were written at two different times. the first half being Margurite being more like herself and the other half that just sounds angry? It seems more like Evie would say that to be honest
Margurites Diary
October 11 My ears have been ringing all day and I haven't been able to sleep since the child showed up. It's like Zoe says: There's something strange about the child, and the woman she brought with her.
-Evie has been at the Baker house for a little under a day (she arrived on the Oct 10th) so Margurites sleep schedule must be very regular for her to notice it being messed up.
-Its a interesting choice of words talking about how strange Evie and Mia are and who brought what (maybe Margurite was dreaming the ship wreck and how it got destroyed)
October 15 I'm seeing things, hearing things, can't stop feeling nauseious. I went to see the doctor in town and he gave me an X-ray. What's happening to me?
October 23 The child gave me a present.
October- I put the present in the secret room right at the back of the second floor, where nobody will find it. That arm is a sign of the child's trust. That arm will lead us to happiness1 And anyone who corrupts that happiness... I won't allow them to live.
1ahem cult cult cult cult. all jokes aside considering what we know of Miranda and the word choice in daughters
corruption meaning: to make someone or something become dishonest or immoral
Jim's letter: Wrecked ship bunk room 1st Deck (where the fuse is)
Dear Janet, Hey, how's it going? I guess half a year or so will have passed by the time you get this letter. Life is so boring here. Day after day, just the same old sea. Although there is one thing that's different. This time we have some passengers sailing with us, which hardly ever happens. It's a couple with a young girl. I think they're distant relatives of the captain. Imagine, traveling on a tanker instead of a passenger ship. They must be hard up! I tried talking to the little girl earlier and her dad shot me this nasty look. What's he so worried about? Now that I think of it, the captian said he didn't even have any relatives… Maybe I'm overthinking this. I miss you. Love, Jim
a little hint of time to how long the Annabelle was expected to be at sea (mentioned in my Mia and Alan post)
poor Jim I wonder how he died. I wonder how Janet is doing as she like every other person waiting for news on the crew was feeling. I wonder if anyone else was suspicious about Mia, Alan and Evie.
Giovannis Will Bunk room 1st deck
It's too late for us, but at least I can let the world know what happened here. I was on night shift yesterday, so I was taking a nap in the bunk room around noon. I was half asleep and I heard a kid, a little girl, laughing. Or was that all in my head? I woke up at 19:30: there was some sort of ruckus in the passageway. Drew, one of the engineers, came in and said there was something going on down below, maybe a riot. He looked pale in the face. He told me he was going down to check it out, but he never came back. It must have been around 19:50 when I heard the scream. I went to the laundry room to check and saw Clark being eaten by some sort of black-ish monster. The monster turned and started coming towards me, huge, shark-like teeth snapping in its jaw. I just screamed like a little girl and ran for it. Now I'm huddled up in the bunk room, shaking as I write this. There's a whole host of those creatures lurking in the passageways now. I can still hear screams now and then, but there's no way I'm going out there now. And that's it: I've written everything I know. Giovanni Finetti
depending on how you play the wrecked ship you can find before you play the tape. Giovanni was infected at some point because he heard Evie laughing
Orders 2nd floor safe room
Special Operations Division Director Alan Droney and Caretaker Mia Winters : Recent reports suggest that if Eveline remains at her current location, she is at a high risk of being stolen by opposing organizations. Your orders, therefore, are to transfer Eveline to our Central American branch for safe keeping until further notice. During transfer, be sure to adhere to the following protocols: Act as parental guardians for Eveline at all times to avoid suspicion. Manage Eveline's vitals via the Genome Codex provided. If the mission is compromised beyond reconciliation, dispose of Eveline
not to keep harping on the things but Alan is Mia's boss and Mia was low on the food chain not only is this an example of dehumanising Evie its also kinda dehumaninsing Mia because from indeed the description of a caretaker is: A Caretaker, or Janitor or a Site Manager, takes care of the security and maintenance of community buildings. Their duties include cleaning, performing simple repairs and maintenance tasks and performing security checks for the buildings in their care.
we don't know who the threat was (partially BSAA but the others? who knows)
avoid suspicion my ass I say this because there were better ways to deal with this sending someone who actually knew kids. Not acting weird when seen by other people on the ship Alan.
another moment of dehuminisation of Evie and they skip straight to "beyond reconciliation" which again makes me doubt they wanted Evie to get to where she was going
Email log salt mines
Sent: Friday, January 16, 2015 12:42 AM Thanks to you guys it's been about a week since my head's been clear and back to normal. And she STILL thinks she's got me! You guys really need to work on fixing that. Not only does she look like a little kid, but she's about as stupid as one, too. Mom and dad are still totally under though. I was wondering. Is the whole "family" obsession something you guys programmed into her? It's kinda fucked up.
so the Bakers were gradually taken over begining from 10th Oct 2014 so this is three? months later. How were the Connections searching for them or did he find a way to contact them from using the boxes containing the d series arm and head?
Sent: Friday, November 4, 2015 2:10 AM That bitch Mia is still somewhere in between Evie-La-La Land and reality. She gets pretty violent, so I locked her up in a cell. I thought maybe Eveline would get mad since Mia's her favorite and all, but she doesn't seem to care. She actually goes and visits her sometimes. She thinks Mia's her mommy. Like I said, your "bioweapon" is fucked up.
so a little longer between Jan and November. I wonder what act of violence was the catalyst for Mia being locked up for 2/3 years. I wonder what Evie was thinking "doesn't seem to care" because of her upbringing I would say it just seemed normal to her? I wonder if it was during these visits they learn of Ethan's existence?
Sent: Friday, September 1, 2016 1:10 AM Eveline's family obsession is getting out of hand. She's making everyone kidnap more and more assholes off the street to add to her freak show of a family. Maybe she's getting tired of Mia not coming around, but it's a pain in the ass for me because I gotta clean up the mess whenever someone new comes along. By the way, Evie's looking sick or something. Her skin is getting all wrinkly and she's getting grey hairs. Is that supposed to happen? It's almost like she's getting old all of a sudden.
Mia still holding strong against Evie's desires despite being in the cell. I wonder what was going through Evie's head when she wanted more people to join the family
Infection Report
This report details the symptoms that appear when the bacterium* that grows inside the E-Series infects a human. Be sure to read this document throughly before dealing with E-Series weaponized assets. Hereafter referred to as "mold". Initial Infection. The mold ingests nutrients from the subject's body to propagate itself, and slowly takes over cells within the body. As a side effect of this, the infected subject gains remarkable regenerative abilities. During experiments, we removed arms and legs from test subjects and found that they were able to coapt the amputated limbs in a matter of minutes. Mid-stage Infection: Once the mold reaches the brain, the subject's thoughts become "in tune" with those of the E-Series asset. If this state continues, the host will lose all sense of ego. Complete Infection: After every cell in the body has been taken over by the mold, the subject begins to lose their human form. Physical mutations differ from case to case, but all result in him or her acquiring incredible physical strength. Containing a subject at this stage would be extremely difficult.
Zombie Ant Fungus (information from Britannica) Once the fungal mass inside an infected ant reaches a critical size (usually about 16–24 days following infection), the ant is induced to leave its nest at different times than its regular foraging habits, and it fails to walk along established ant trails. Infected ants are generally unresponsive to external stimuli, including other ants... Carpenter ants in areas with zombie-ant fungus have evolved a number of adaptations to limit their exposure to the parasite. Carpenter ants in infested areas tend to be more arboreal than those without the fungus threat, suggesting that they avoid the forest floor to limit exposure to the spores. They also practice social grooming and can remove spores from each other’s bodies before infection can occur. The ants have also been observed to carry infected members of the colony away from the nest and from their usual ant trails on the forest floor to reduce the spread of spores to high traffic areas, and they are known to actively avoid the graveyards of infected dead.
nothing more needs to be said does it?
Report One (much of this is redacted) salt mine still you can read the full thing here. but i'm focusing on the bits that stood out to me.
This project was instigated in 2000 as one of several concepts for the company's NEXBAS (next-generation experimental battlefield superiority) initiative, working with technical assistance from H.C.F., to develop a bioweapon for neutralizing combatants en masse with minimal direct contact. NEXBAS was later folded, and all its assets diverted to this project. What makes this project markedly different from conventional weapons is its ability to turn enemy combatants into allies; converting hostile elements into willing servants... The resultant organisms were referred to as "candidate specimens" and graded based on usability, from the impratical and faulty Series A through D, to the perfected E-Series. A common appearance was selected for the bioweapons; that of a roughly ten-year-old girl, to ensure ease of blending in with urban/refugee populations... Eveline's control is exerted in a series of discrete stages, the first of which is hallucination. Almost immediately after infection, the subject begins to see images of Eveline (though she is not in fact there) and hear her voice (which is inaudible to anyone else). Auditions with infected subjects throughout the stages of infection reveal that at first, the phantom Eveline appears to be a normal young girl, sometimes desiring companionship or assistance. As time progresses, she begins making more and more extreme demands, including self-mutilation and attacks on other people. The psychological shock this induces helps to break down the mind's natural barriers to Eveline's brainwashing effect, and by the time mental control is achieved, the mutamycete infection has progressed throughout the body's cells...
1 H.C.F. is Wesker he was in charge of it for a time and it and he was behind the events of code veronica
2 this was Evie's sales pitch. Essentially Evie being dropped into a combat zone she would be able to stop the fighting (the regenerative factor was just a bonus)
3 from the way this is worded the other mutamycete experiments had different looks, but for the way they were going to use them a 10 year old child is best.
4 what happened to Ethan is he heard her first and heard her after getting the arm
5 we see all this happen with Jack when he stabbed himself and attacks Margurite and Zoe
Report 2
... The researchers have been calling these super-organisms the "Molded"; made of mold, and also molded as in "shaped". The name has a certain elegance to it. For the treatment of accidental infections, performing □□□□□ on samples of Eveline's body tissue produces a unique fungicidal serum. 1 Administering the serum to an infected subject will cause the mycelia to calcify, but if the subject's cells are already largely invaded, the serum will be fatal. 2 Since the treatment window is so small, the serum's primary use is therefore disposal of infected subjected, rather than a cure. In exploring the serum's potential, we found that subjecting it to □□□□□ would enhance its effects to extreme potency, becoming a compound we now call E-Necrotoxin, which □□□□□□□□□□□□□ in even tiny amounts. 3 What's been interesting to observe in Eveline's behavior is her obsession with the concept of family. In experiments, we found multiple occasions that infected subjects were compelled to act as her "mother" or "father", treating her as if she were really their daughter. Why did she settle upon family as the theme for her mental control? This is just speculation, but it could be that she instinctively understands that a family unit is better suited to blending into social groups than a lone girl. On the other hand…well, a sentimental sort might suggest she's making up for a perceived lack of "love" in her quarantined upbringing. A parent's love.
1 see this in the boathouse
2 say it with me the serum that Zoe was putting a lot of hope on is basic and wouldn't have worked either way (I didn't think of this at the time but this is why Alan didn't suggest getting the serum prepared for him when he was still alive)
3 I would say its both due to her own wants and what she can infer from around. And this also part of why Village is a little stupid at parts because of the picture we see with Miranda and Evie wearing what she was when getting on the boat so either Miranda didn't have much direct contact with the clone of her daughter or she did and for the sake of brevity the author of the report didn't mention her. I say its the latter. Miranda and the Connections at large are the worst either way.
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aroaessidhe · 10 months
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2023 reads // twitter thread
Court of the Undying Seasons
NA high fantasy
demigirl volunteers to be taken by the vampires instead of her friend intending to kill them for revenge, but quickly learns that’ll be impossible unless she becomes one
she has to get through her training to become a vampire or live as a human thrall, and quickly gets swept up in their world - and discovers a string of murders that could have dire consequences for them all
#Court of the Undying Seasons#aroaessidhe 2023 reads#ok i was kinda hoping this would be more me than most things in its genre niche....but is just kinda is that#why is the main couple a thing? what is the attraction? i feel like I skipped half a book. you’re gonna kill him right#just really did not get that at all lmao. ur usual dark fantasy romance i gues#it’s kind of pitched as ‘she wants to kill vamps!!!’ but like. she immediately learns that’ll be too hard and basically forgets about it lo#i feel like the courts being named after colours reads. well you know it reads like the stereotype of YA with different factions to choose#but I guess I get that if they were called by their alt names it would have been a lot of confusing info to keep track of#the mc being a demigirl is pretty subtle#if you’re looking for it you can see the trans coding#but if you weren’t I feel like it might just read as girl who’s slightly uncomfortable with her appearance…#which is fine I guess. but just so you know if you're picking it up for that#also picked it up for ace side characters but like…. it’s not rly like the authors other books#there’s vague mentions but tbqh I’ve forgotten who is supposed to be ace#(probably because I read like 6 other books between starting and finishing this)#also genderfluid side character who is like. treated as two different people when they’re girl or boy version?#which is sort of treated as a vampire thing but i thought it felt odd#anyway all in all not entirely bad just not for me at all lol
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bastille tmrw interview from 2016 for that one anon ❤️
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fayes-fics · 17 days
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Mirror, Mirror
Pairing: Benedict Bridgerton x fem!reader
Summary: When Benedict's wife tries on his clothes, things happen...
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Warnings: 18+ smut, minors DNI, cross-dressing, clothing kink, light biting, breast play, a smidge of intercrural sex, very mild exhibitionism, mirror sex, vaginal sex.
Word Count: 2.2k
Authors Note: Request fill for @d-caryophyllus (HERE) about Benedict being aroused by his wife dressing up in his clothing. I hope this fits what you were hoping for, my dear. Thanks as ever to @colettebronte for the beta read. Yes, the title is a nod to Season 3, lol. Err, enjoy! <3
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It’s early in the morning on a mundane Thursday when a somewhat daring idea forms in your mind. 
Fresh out of your morning bath, you dismiss your maid quietly when usually she would assist you with dressing for the day. As the double doors click closed discreetly behind her, you glance through the open archway into your bedroom; heavy curtains still drawn there, obscuring the sunlight. In the darkness, you can just decipher the outline of your husband sleeping soundly after a late night of carousing with his brothers.
With a little secret smile, you decide that, yes, now is the perfect time. He is asleep, and you have a few hours to spare until your first social engagement - a ladies' luncheon - so why not use the time to satisfy your curiosity?
You stride to your husband's side of the dressing room, opening his wardrobe doors and running your fingers over the items within—a symphony of wools, silks and cotton, all luxurious to the touch. While he is arguably one of the more flamboyantly dressed men of the Ton, with eye-catching jewel-toned waistcoats and colourful cravats, the basics of his outfit are mostly the same every time: dark trousers and a white shirt. A large part of you is envious of that easier choice. Sometimes, it feels like a veritable minefield being a woman during the social season, the looming threat of an unintended fashion faux pas simply by wearing the wrong colour to the wrong event.
Upon a chair, you spy the outfit he discarded when he came home in the early hours, not yet tidied away by your staff. You decide this shall be your choice, a frisson that they are already worn.
Dropping your bathrobe from your shoulders, you grab the pair of his trousers and pull them on. The finely woven wool feels plush on your skin, and there is an undeniable novelty in having fabric between your thighs. They are, however, almost comically long for you, and you have to bend to roll them up a few times around your ankles. Bemused, you briefly catch sight of your reflection in the full-length dressing room mirror, topless in oversized trousers. 
You snatch his white shirt and pull it on, pausing to tug the ruffled lapels up to your face and inhale deeply, enjoying the flood of scent there. His woodsy citrus cologne, yes, but also that undercurrent that is all him. That tang you cannot help but bury your face into, be it upon his pillow when he is away or his body while you cling to him, moving together in ecstasy. 
You fasten a few buttons, then tuck the shirt into the trousers and loop the braces hanging loose around your hips up onto your shoulders, once again inspecting your reflection in the mirror with a wry smile, twisting this way and that, admiring how different you look dressed in his clothing.
“Wife, what are you doing?” 
You almost jump out of your skin as that velvet tone, slightly roughened by sleep, calls out from across the room. You twist to see Benedict leaning casually upon the archway into the dressing room, shooting you a look that is pure menacing intrigue while looking like sin himself—all riotous bedhead, and, as your eyes slip further down, gloriously naked. It makes you swallow hard.
“I… I was trying on your clothes,” you stumble sheepishly, a blush creeping over your cheeks being caught doing something perhaps rather bizarre. 
“Any reason?” he queries, bemused, that crooked smile claiming his features.
“They just seem so much more practical and comfortable—especially trousers. I would like to wear such things…” you confess, turning back to the mirror to appraise your appearance again, watching him prowl towards you in the reflection. “Are… are you vexed with me, husband? For taking such liberties?” Your words petering out, mildly abashed.
A large, warm hand wraps around your shoulder, yanking you back almost roughly, making you gasp as your shoulder blades collide with his chest.
“The precise opposite,” he rumbles, his eyes meeting yours in the mirror, a sudden burning intensity that makes your lungs feel tight. 
Long fingers spider down his brocade brace, draped down your chest, lingering where the strap rests over your nipple, swiping his thumb in a deliberate tease, his face triumphant as you swoon back into him from just this simple touch. 
“My clothes look much better upon you than me,” he opines duskily, his lips tracing your temple as his fingertips push the brace aside to capture your nipple through the thin cotton shirt, making you inhale sharply. “Perhaps we should attend a party with you dressed like this?”
“That would be a scandal!” 
There is a vault in your stomach at the idea of attending a social event dressed in his clothes, even as you melt under his questing touch.
“Not in the more… bohemian… circles that I know of…” he contends; his breath is a warm gust in your ear as his other hand does the same, fondling both nipples now.
He waits until you meet his gaze in the mirror again, then lowers his lips to your neck and bites gently. His incisors a faint scrape, immediately soothed by a wide, wet lathe of his tongue. A little crest of victory as something sizeable stirs against the cleft of your bottom. 
“If I were dressed as you, then what would you wear, husband?” 
“Whatever you would like, my darling,” he offers between soft, damp kisses, a tingle running up your neck from his lips to the top of your scalp. “I could wear your clothing should you wish it. Or perhaps just your corset and underwear?” He nuzzles into you, taking a deep breath. “Our little secret…”
Something about his tone, the images he concocts, makes your blood run warm, your hand reaching up and diving into his luscious hair, tugging gently upon his roots so again he feels compelled to use his teeth, a groan bubbling up from within as he does. With a flick of his wrists, the braces fall from your shoulders, and he cups your breasts through his thin cotton shirt. It makes you sigh his name, asking for more, arousal coursing thickly through your veins—a yen to be taken right away. 
“The thought arouses you, does it not?” he correctly surmises, trailing his touch down over the shirt, brushing your ribs and belly to the fastening on the trousers, making short work of the buttons.
You nod demurely, biting your lip as you watch his dextrous hands in the mirror, his arms encircling you; it is almost as if he is removing them from himself. The air feels heady as he pushes the loosened fabric from around your frame, and it hits the rug with an audible thump.
Standing before him in just his ruffled white shirt with only a few buttons fastened, you feel his weighted stare in the mirror, lingering on the patch of hair at the apex of your thighs peeking out between the shirt sides.
“I shall prefer you keep this on…” he asserts, popping open a button over your chest so the fabric opens enough for him to slide a hand inside, tweaking your nipple and pulling you back into his frame, rutting his now solid cock against your bottom.
You turn your head to press your lips to his, imploring for more of his touch in a fervent whisper before seeking a kiss. His mouth is hot on yours, rolling his tongue with yours, endless caresses of your breasts as you burn so hot you rub your thighs together in delicious anticipation of more, already more than ready for him, your clit pulsing with each tease of his tongue.
“Here?”
You know what he is asking—if you wish to have sex right where you stand, in front of your dressing mirror, his shirt loose around your body, him naked behind you.
“Yes. Yes please…” you murmur into his mouth, rolling your body against him, telegraphing unmistakable need.
“The window is open,” he points out with a smirk, nodding towards a high window that allows in light to the dressing room but affords you not to be seen; it is open this morning to let in the summer breeze. “What if we are heard?”
“I care not,” you confess, exhaling jaggedly, knowing he likes you in this state, desperate and debauched, uncaring if you may be overheard in your pursuit of pleasure. 
Rubbing yourself upon him akin to a feline in heat, moving so his cock passes teasingly between your thighs now as you writhe. He groans and tells you not to stop, hissing his approval. So you squeeze your legs together tightly, allowing him to rut between them, the pass of his cock glancing maddeningly over your engorged clit.
His touch becomes heavier, hands mapping your body as his hips surge, and you see the red, weeping tip of his cock emerging and disappearing in the mirror, an intoxicating sight. You moan lightly with every pass, a tantalising swipe, not enough to bring you real pleasure, just notching your want higher.
He finally takes pity upon you, angling his hips differently and driving into you; you, moaning at the invasion so deep and encompassing, rocked up onto your tiptoes. Every time he has entered your body, it's always the same: a force that steals your breath and makes your eyes roll. His hands are a firm grip around your waist as he withdraws slowly back, then surges in again, capturing your earlobe in his teeth as he does.
As your eyes meet in the mirror, you idly wonder how many other wives are watching themselves being fucked by a handsome husband like this; a bright weekday morning, birdsong wafting in on the scented breeze, body wrapped only in his shirt. You suspect none are quite so lucky.
You moan his name and arch back against him, wrapping your hands around his neck and watching yourself being taken, relying on him to keep your stance steady as he starts to fuck into you in earnest, large hands sliding up to cup your breasts, engulfing them in his warm palms.
Unable to stop the noises you make, each pass hitting all the spots inside that make your toes curl into the thick pile of the rug beneath your feet, your pussy clenching around his invasion, making him growl and move faster, taking you harsher, an onslaught that is as pleasurable as it is powerful.
His mouth is a breathy litany of praise into your cheekbone, your eyes fluttering closed to focus on the carnal moment - the sweat, the skin, the ragged breaths, the meeting of your bodies so primal and glorious, but he has other ideas.
“Look at yourself,” he purrs dulcetly, your eyes reopening to do as he asks, to watch this unrestrained moment of passion, to see the little marks blooming on your body from where his fingers dig into your flesh as he pounds into you now, a flourish of colour on your neck from his thorough attention.
You plead for more throatily, pushing back as best you can against his thrusts, wanting him to make you scream, uncaring of any audience inside or outside your townhouse, only craving the sweet, blissful release he always provides.
Abruptly, he wrenches open the shirt you wear, one button pinging forward and tinking against the mirror before skittering across the floor, your naked body framed by his crisp white shirt, the ruffled lapels tickling the sides of your breasts, catching sight of his handsome face in the mirror contorted in a passionate tempest.
Then one hand slides down your front, you feeling it rippling in your belly and seeing it in your reflection before you until those fingers slide between your legs and hook over your clit with a force that steals the air from your lungs, a sharp stab of pleasure that makes your knees buckle, him pausing in his motions briefly to brace your weight, keep you upright.
Then it is a blur as he restarts his motion, his fingers dance on your swollen pearl, slipping silkily over his touch as he grunts encouragements. It feels like you are circling for so long, so close to something mind-blowing, but then he flicks harshly with his fingernail and bites your neck, and you are hurtling. Everything is loud and quiet at once, no doubt your voice calling his name as you tumble over the edge, clenching hard around him as your whole body shatters and rebuilds in a blissful puzzle. Dimly, as you float, you feel his entire body tense, and with a roar, he follows you over, a warmth blooming inside you as he reaches completion. 
There are a few moments of panted breaths as you both recover from the intensity before he spins you around and sweeps you into his arms, carrying you back to bed. There, he lays you down gently and proceeds to turn you into a molten, quivering pile, mapping your body with his lips and fingers until you are begging for him again, which he more than obliges. So much so you are almost late for your social engagement.
If there are a few derogatory looks as you swan into the ladies' luncheon with a blissful smile and a burgeoning mark on your neck from your husband's amorous intentions, well, so be it. You wouldn't change it for the world.
And it is also most definitely not the last time you dress up in his clothes…
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Benedict taglist pt 1: @makaylan @longingintheuniverse @iboopedyournose @colettebronte @aintnuthinbutahounddog @severewobblerlightdragon @writergirl-2001 @heeyyyou @enichole445 @enchantedbytomandhenry @ambitionspassionscoffee @chaoticcalzoneranchsports @nikaprincessofkattegat @baebee35 @crowleysqueenofhell @fiction-is-life @lilacbeesworld @broooookiecrisp @queen-of-the-misfit-toys @eleanor-bradstreet @divaanya @musicismyoxygen84 @miindfucked @sorryallonsy @cayt0123 @hottytoddyhistory @fictionalmenloversblog @zinzysstuff @malpalgalz @kinokomoonshine @causeimissu @delehosies @m-rae23 @last-sheep @panhoeofmanyfandoms @kmc1989 @desert-fern @corpseoftrees-queen @magical-spit @bunnyweasley23 @how-many-stars-in-the-sky @sya-skies
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redbullgirly · 4 months
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Can you do a Lewis Hamilton smau where she is basically like Barbie? I feel like since Barbie is a fashion icon and so is Lewis, it would be a match made in Heaven. I read your pinned post and tried to make a request based on your rules. Sorry if it isn’t good enough
HI BARBIE! HI KEN! [part 1, LH44 smau]
Lewis Hamilton x reader
Masterlist & Hi Barbie! Hi Ken! [part2, LH44 smau]
Summary: Lewis Hamilton is part-time Formula One driver and full-time fashion icon. And so is his girlfriend, Y/N Y/L/N, who's also known as a real life Barbie.
Warnings: None... but a lot of pink XD. Also this story is set in December 2023, so no broken hearts over Lewis going to Ferrari... actually maybe just a little teaser.
Author's Note: Hi Anon! This request is great and thank you so much for it, it definitely is good enough! :) I had fun writing and creating this, even though at the end it's kind of different than what I firstly intended to do. The original idea was to make Y/N very Barbie coded, but at the end I'd say she's Barbie inspired and I focused more on the fashion icon part of the request. Though there's a sweet storyline about why her nickname is Barbie, so I hope you won't be disappointed! :)
lewishamilton posted on instagram
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lewishamilton A lot happened in 2023 season and there was also a lot of outfits 🤞🏾✨
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user1 MY GOD THIS MAN IS BEAUTIFUL!
yourusername this was definitely one of my favs 💝
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lewishamilton What can I say... pink is the color of real men 🫶🏾
yourusername but do i still wear it the best?
lewishamilton Of course ma'am
user2 I love them sm 😭
user3 can we talk about the fact they're the best couple ever?!
user4 so sweet🥰
user5 And the fact she's literally the only person he interacts with in the comments...
user6 You are the best Lewis, can't wait for another season 👏
user7 🔥❤️
mercedesamgf1 Did someone say Barbie and Ken?💘
user8 YES
user9 admin you're so real for this... they literally ARE our barbie and ken 🤭
user10 The only question is who is the Barbie and who's the Ken? xd
user11 lol imagine barbie lewis💀
user12 GOAT ⬆️♥️
carmenmmundt Me and goergerussell63 when?
gourgerussell I don't really think pink is my colour...😬
yourusername don't worry honey, if he won't wear pink w you i will 😘
carmenmmundt Oh I knew why you're my favourite Y/N 😘
georgerussell63 No wait I changed my mind darling!!
carmenmmundt Hmm now I'll have to think about it 🤔
georgerussell63 Y/NNNNN
yourusername 😌😚
user13 i love how he always manages to get y/n into his posts
user14 The power boyfriend Lewis has over me😩😩
user15 RIGHT?!
user16 he's just so... asdgsagfsgd 😫
user17 I literally need this version of him to live!!!
user18 i'm weak for bf lewis🥵
user19 Y/N looks SO GOOD in that coat
user20 I need to know how she does it
user21 fr
user22 The best driver and a fashion icon... damn he's got some talent 🙇‍♂️
yourusername posted on instagram
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yourusername great season and now it'll be even better winter break w my love 💋💞
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f1 Our own Barbie🤩
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user1 yeeeees
user2 Wait I'm new in formula one, why do we call Lewis Hamilton's gf Babrie??
user3 idk user2 she just gives off the energy 😆
user4 Actually I think Lewis himself once called her Barbie in an interview when there were rumors about them dating and then it just stuck with her 🤷‍♀️
user5 oh really?!! tbh i had idea he ever called he barbie himself... y/n is just iconic xd
user6 IT'S Y/N'S WORLD AND WE'RE JUST LIVING IN IT 🗣🗣
lewishamilton Can't wait to spend the winter break with you ✨
yourusername *mwah*
user7 pls I'm so excited for them!!
user8 the vacation photo dumps are gonna slay🤭
alexandrasaintmleux stoppp you're so pretty!🎀
yourusername nooo you are alex 🥹🫶
user9 they could never make me hate these two just 'cause they're dating the hottest drivers on the grid🫡
user10 The outfit in the second photo? HELLO?!
kellypiquet 🤍
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charles_leclerc I see you like the Monaco circuit very much👀
yourusername i see you're stalking my photo dumps very carefully charles leclerc 🤨
charles_leclerc Well I have a feeling we'll see each other more often soon so I have to get to know you better😉
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charles_leclerc Caught in the crime😂
user11 WHAT WAS THAT CHARLES?!
user12 omg I wasn't the only one to see it? I'm not delusional right?🫣
user13 idk what you saw 'cause i didn't but this interaction is so funny to me XD
user14 mommy- sorry... MOTHER
user15 ❣️❣️
user16 y/n & lew >>>>
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yourusername i'm barbie. he's just a ken (and he won some trophy for p3 in the championship... idk where it is) 💖💄
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user1 I live for Lewis leaving the trophy there💀
user2 and the way y/n basically confirmed this by saying she has no idea where it is😭
lewishamilton You're everything. I'm just Ken 🙏🏾✨
yourusername exactly... though you're the best ken ever 💞
sebastianvettel Isn't he more like Allan then?
yourusername ohhh true seb 🤭
user3 YOU WANNA TELL ME THE SEBASTIAN VETTEL SAW BARBIE
yourusername yeah we made him watch it and he cried during gloria's speech 💓
sebastianvettel I'm not ashamed about it.
yourusername and that's why i love u seb 🫶
user4 why aren't all men like sebastian???😩
user5 I love these three with all my heart y'all don't understand
user6 my fav driver watching my fav movie and crying during speech about feminism is my roman empire
user7 AAAHSDFHFGSDHSG😍
f1 If there was a prize for fashion icons, the Hamilton household would definetly win it! 🏆
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user8 not admin calling them hamilton household🥹
user9 Lol that would be the only fairly given trophy this year
user10 OMG I just realized that one day Y/N and Lewis WILL be both HAMILTON😭😭
user11 I'll tattoo the date of their wedding on my arm fr
user12 that's real dedication user11 💀
user13 TRUE DEFINITION OF A QUEEN... LOVE YOUUUUUU
kellypiquet Gorgeous darling!💖💖💖
yourusername we both babeee 💖🫶
user14 the IT wags casually supporting each other
user15 I love they're still friends even though their bfs are probably the biggest rivals xd
user16 not the shade about the trophy💀
user17 Waiiittt what happened?
user18 someone who was at the ceremony said lewis gave him the prize 'cause he didn't want it😭
user17 Oh and Y/N wrote in her caption she doesn't know where it is?
user18 exactly😭
user17 Whoops... I love her, she's queen for that
user19 and the fact fia tried to deny these rumors💀
user20 Absolutely love this look 🤍
user21 you and lew are just such a good looking couple
user22 THE DRESS I REPEAT THE DRESS🥰
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lewishamilton 🇲🇨 with the best company.
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roscoelovescoco Mom's look's so handsome's ☺️☀️
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lewishamilton Agreed
yourusername awww my boys are too sweet 🥹💕
user1 lewis complimenting his gf not w one but TWO accounts makes my heart melt
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user2 I want a man like him🤧
user3 WE LOVE ROSCOE CALLING HER MUM
user4 Lewis, Y/N & Roscoe are the best trio ever🥰
user5 parents and their son
user6 literally omg
yourusername wow who's that handsome boy laying on a couch 🥴😻
lewishamilton Handsome you say?😏
yourusername yeah, right next to u 🥰
lewishamilton Oh no, I should've seen that coming😒
roscoelovescoco Thank's mom's I'm handsome's boy's 😊👅
user7 these interactions give me the will to live
user8 I love the Hamilton family🥺
user9 lol y/n calling roscoe handsome xd
user10 The funniest part about this is that Lewis manages Roscoe's profile😭
user11 omg yes user10 not him playing being offended on his main and then being all sweet as roscoe...
user12 Love forever ❤️
user13 Y/N is so beautiful I can't believe my own eyes
user14 the two belong together forever 🙌🫶♾️💫
user15 fr
user16 If they ever break up I'll stop believing on love
mercedesamgf1 Mr. & Mrs. Mercedes
user17 pls give him decent car in 2024 to win another championship🙏
user18 The most iconic couple in history of motorsport 💅
user19 ❤️😍
user20 what's Ferrari doing in the likes?🤨
user21 lol calm down... he's literally lewis hamilton🤣
user22 No but it's weird... they never like other team's things
user23 and after the rumors during monaco gp too 🥸🥸
user24 I think this photo dump caused global warming... like daaammmnnn they're both so fine 🥵
user25 let's just say roscoe isn't the only one calling them mommy and daddy-
user26 lmao
user26 but true🫢
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yourusername barbie has a great day everyday... especially when she gets pink mercedes she wanted 🛍🤍
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lewishamilton Seems like Ken is good for something
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yourusername maybeeee
lewishamilton You want pink Ferrari too, don't you?
yourusername ☺️☺️
user1 ohhh to have a man like that
user2 OMG LEWIS PLS GET HER PINK FERRARI
user3 Yeah, Y/N will slay in that car😌
user4 i wanna be barbie too if she gets pink mercedes
user5 but first you'll need to have a ken like lewis hamilton
francisca.cgomes this barbie is so prettyyyy
yourusername love u! 💓
user6 Okay okay I NEED the bikini😫😍
user7 QUEEN
user8 Y/N looking gorgeous like always🫶🏼
user9 gold digger alert!!!!🤮
user10 Girl go away, you clearly know nothing about their relationship xd
user11 jealousy alert!!!
user12 the first pic does something to me 😩
user13 The most beautiful woman ever
user14 Lewis won lottery w her
user15 yes she's literally so pretty and they seem so happy together🥰
user16 fr I don't think I've seen him this happy before
user17 yeah he looks so much calmer and even younger when y/n is with him at event and gps...🥹
user18 Plus the OUTFITS?! I love them sm
user19 Where is Lewis 🙂?
user20 c'mmon he doesn't have to be in every post she makes🙄
user21 stunning as always 💘
user22 SLAYING AS ALWAYS
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Y/N’s interview
photo 1: Y/N: How did you and Lewis meet?
Y/F/N: Oh, you guys'll love the story!
photo 2: Y/N: It was actually in a toy store. Lew was there with his niece and I was there because... [laughs] Let's say I still like to collect dolls and lego, sue me.
photo 3: Y/N: Anyway, Lew's niece saw me, thought I'm a real life Barbie and wanted to say hi. [laughs] It was honestly so sweet that I didn't have the heart to tell her I'm just a normal girl.
photo 4: Y/F/N: So does she still think you're Barbie? [laughs]
Y/N: Yeah, I think so... She calls me Auntie Barbie! [laughs too]
photo 5: Y/N: But back to Lewis - I didn't recognize him and just thought he's really cute. We talked for few minutes, though then I had to leave and didn't have the courage to ask for his number.
photo 6: Y/N: But few days later he followed me on Instagram and I was just like - yes!
Lewis’ interview
Interviewer: Lewis, you recently followed a known influencer and model on Instagram. Is there something going on between the two of you?
Lewis: Are you talking about Barbie? Oh, shoot, sorry... [laughs] I mean Y/N?
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yourusername aesthetic life w the best man, cute son and lots of flowers 🌸💖
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roscoelovescoco I got's mom's the's flowers's 😊🌷
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yourusername thx roscoe baby!! 🫶 guess daddy will have to learn from you 😌🤍
user1 ... are we gonna talk about the fact y/n just called lewis daddy?
yourusername ... no please don't, you know what i meant 😭🙈
user2 Too late Y/N, the twitter girlies are going to go nuts about this (me included)
landonorris Awww look at that grumpy little dude 🥺
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pierregasly Mate are you calling the seven world time champion grumpy little dude?🤣
user3 lando tf-
user4 This is so funny for no reason😭
user5 Lewis being called grumpy little dude wasn't what I expected from this winter break tbh
landonorris ROSCOE
landonorris I WAS TALKING ABOUT ROSCOE GUYS
user6 💀💀
pierregasly Lol
yourusername why did you even think it was about lewis peirregasly ??🧐
landonorris YEAH MR. TRIPOD TELL US
pierregasly Goodbye...👋
user7 u and lew are so sweet
user8 MOTHER IS MOTHERING 😍
alexandrasaintmleux Shining like a star✨💖
yourusername and you're my sun ☀️💖
user9 I want a man who gives me so many flowers!!!
user10 yeah and they're beautiful and tasteful too
lewishamilton So lucky to have you darling! 🫧🫶🏾
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yourusername we're both so lucky lew 💗🫶
user11 and i'm lucky i was born in the same century as you so i can witness this love
user12 I LOVE Y/N & LEWIS🥰
user13 I'll ask again... When is he going to put a ring on it? 💍 C'mon Lewis you obviously love her sm
user14 Your guys love is so special ❤️
user15 if this is the content we'll be getting during winter break, i don't think i want it to end
user16 races are great... but boyfriend material lewis hamilton is better🤤
user17 REAL
THE END
Author's Note: Hi and thank you for reading! I'll be glad for likes, reblogs, comments, follows and any other ways of support. PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANT PART 2! I really enjoyed this version of Lewis and Y/N... and perhaps I have a lot of pictures that unfortunately didn't make it to the story because picture limit isn't very friendly. Love you and have a great day! :)
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jukednuked · 10 months
Text
lyney the type of guy to 'recharge' his magic by kissing you
lyney the type of guy who'd send one of his hat pigeons to deliver you a love letter (it turned into confetti after being read)
lyney the type of guy to let you carry him on your back because he's 'tired' (blud wants to be as close to you as possible)
lyney the type of guy who'd apologize to you by making a bouquet of flowers appear out of nowhere
lyney also the type of guy who'd value what you both have a lot, he'll get real serious if he senses any type of resentment after an argument
lyney the type of guy to teach you a magic trick or two, like how to steal someone's heart maybe?
lyney the type of guy who'd be so good at pick up lines that it's almost frustrating how he can make you feel like jelly in a split second
lyney the type of guy who'd never, ever let you come to his house in hopes of avoiding a certain harbinger (blud doesnt want you to get put in a meat grinder)
lyney the type of guy to massage your shoulders frequently because seeing you all satisfied makes him feel like he can take care of you
lyney the type of guy who'd jokingly bite you one time because you just look too cute (it will become more than one time)
lyney the type of guy who'd beg you to become his assistant in one of his magic tricks involving a box and a saw because lynette refused
lyney the type of guy who'd trace shapes on your hands whenever you feel upset and just want to sit in silence
lyney the type of guy who'd get real sad if he doesn't find you in the audience when he's having a magic show, might fumble over his words and accidentally make a snake appear rather than a cat
lyney the type of guy who'd tell you to throw tomatoes at him like he's a medieval criminal if he ever fails a magic trick
lyney the type of guy who uses the thought of you as a way to cope with his past
lyney the type of guy who'd show off his magic to you whenever you compliment someone else just for you to go wowowoww lyney!!
lyney the type of guy who conveniently always chooses you as guest of the magic show
lyney the type of guy to get you a matching hat just like his one, just a different colour
lyney the type of guy to have a diary<33 every page involves your name at least 1-2 times
lyney the type of guy to slide notes with angry faces drawn on them under your door whenever you forget to give him his goodmorning/afternoon/night/literally-every-part-of-the-day kiss
lyney is that guy
A/N: my sincerest apologies @strawberrylabs if you look closely you can see the blood, sweat and tears i shedded writing this😓🙏 i secretly wanted to switch it to the most gut wrenching angst mid way but im soooo nice
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hwajin · 2 months
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☆°. — ғɪғᴛᴇᴇɴ ᴍɪɴᴜᴛᴇs ᴘᴀsᴛ ғᴏᴜʀ | hhj
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𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: smut, fluff
𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: hyunjin x afab!reader
𝐰𝐜: 3.4k
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: unprotected sex, cumming inside
𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: this is barely proof read AND inspired by the bathrobe look in paris but also hyunjin in milan 🫶 hope you like it <333
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You could feel his gaze on you. On your figure, your body. On your whole. The clear sound of his 2B pencil dancing along the cheap, store-bought paper echoed quietly in contrast to the music playing somewhere in the back, from the radio, or one of your phones, or from outside your hotel room altogether — it didn’t much matter to you, for his gaze on your body, on your figure, on your whole was all that did.
You weren’t sure if he was aware that you were aware — his eyes on you, the pencil scratching against the paper; you knew you were the object for his current spurt of creativity. The object of his inspiration. The object of his works — his very own and personal muse. You knew, and the knowledge, the very thought alone, made you dizzy, made you lose track of the sentence you were reading in the tour guide provided by the hotel.
Milan was beautiful. You were working your way through page after page, taking in museums and cathedrals, art galleries you knew Hyunjin would die to see. One page, his gaze on you, long, intimate, longing. Another page, eyeing the ‘Pinacoteca di Brera’, putting in a bookmark to later show him, and you felt his eyes on you again. Unbudging. Persistent. He either was unsure of your anatomy, or simply enjoyed to stare.
“I can feel you staring, you know.”
You looked up, and your eyes momentarily locked with his own, dark ones. Sparking. Speaking, without words. His hair had dried a good bit ever since he’d stepped out the shower, the white bathrobe snug loosely around his naked body leaving only so much to imagination. You looked at him, smiling, teasing, and he stared back — aware, and smug. His eyes wandered down to his art again — faint strokes of your face adorning the page and you wondered what had moved Hyunjin to capture you in this very moment — it was mundane, the moment, and you didn’t look any bit different – or, better, for that matter – than you did any other day. You were reading a tour guide, lazy, tired, solemn — you wondered where he saw the beauty in that.
“I know. I don’t mind that you can feel it.”
A pang to your heart, and he looked up from his page again, after adding lines here and there which as though magically transformed into plasticity, into your eyes and nose and mouth. You were fascinated by his art. You grew bashful at his words. And you were enamored by his eyes, his face. His whole; the way he looked. Milan was beautiful — but suddenly you forgot all about the tour guide, about the trip here you had bought for his birthday. You forgot all about the sights and museums and art galleries, for he sat across from you, sight enough, creating the only art you ever wished to look at.
You were sure you blushed, your skin acquainting the same colour of the roses blooming on the table in a vase. You could smell them, their scent spreading all around and luring you into depths so captivating you wanted to exist in them for eternity.
Only now you noticed the red paint by your lover’s side, only after thorough inspection of him. He parted his eyes from your own with a grin and continued on his drawing — on your drawing, ultimately, because you knew he’d gift it to you after finishing touches —; his hands reached after the brush laying beside his paper, and with a dip into beforehand-prepared water he activated the red colour, and let it swim across white paper. You couldn't take your eyes off him. You couldn’t take your eyes off the way his hands controlled the paint on his canvas, how the pigment drowned and spread and melted against the grey lines of pencil. Taking everything in, swallowing details, yet enhancing the object of the art, enhancing features of your face. Your cheeks suddenly shone red now on the white paper — and maybe it had been his aim after all, to make you shy, to make you bashful. Reality materialised onto paper, into art. Love did, for every brushstroke, every further pigment of red paint on white canvas meant love, for every further gaze of his, for reference or his own enjoyment you weren’t sure, meant adoration.
It took Hyunjin far longer to finish the painting than he had intended it to. Not because he was struggling with it — drawing you in all shapes and forms was a second nature to him by now —, and not because of exterior reasons altogether. Yet he sat and painted, away and away, adding a line here, colour there, watching you go back to the tour guide; he was sure that it could not possibly take you so long to finish it. That you were spending far too much time on each page, that you were eyeing Hyunjin far too often after every other sentence you read. That it wouldn’t possibly take you so long to inspect sights and places — but that you and him were set on the same mission, seemingly, on the same, interior goal. Finishing the tour guide, completing the painting — meant ending the moment. Ending the tranquility, discarding, ultimately, from admiring the other in the golden light of the slowly setting sun, shadows of trees and buildings casting paintings on your faces. The moment would end, the sun would set, would stop drowning the ebony furniture in your hotel room in golden showers, snow-white bed sheets in warm rays.
You looked up; Hyunjin looked at you, inspecting, one second, another, before he went back to his painting, as concentrated as he had stared at you. You let your eyes wander to somewhere behind him — you looked out the western window, which blind’s didn't do well in saving you from the blinding sun, though you wouldn't have wanted them to, admired the sunset, the city that laid in it, the foreign neighbourhood, the white sky. Maybe Hyunjin caught beauty there — the rich sun on your face. Your sparking eyes, your gleaming expression. Almost sacred, solemn. Meant for only the two of you.
You caught glimpse of the broken clock on the wall behind him, showing fifteen minutes past four — it had been showing fifteen minutes past four for the past two hours now. Or for the past three? How much later was it now, ever since you had settled into the hotel room? The sun had long started to set behind the horizon, though it had stood at its highest spot when you had first entered the single bedroom for two; yet maybe no time had passed at all. Maybe in his presence love was eternal, unending.
You stood up. You had been looking at Hyunjin for far too long; had been only looking at him, inspected his every move, reciprocated his every long, fixed stare, shuddering beneath it simply. You had studied his ever-drying dark hair, his ever-parting bathrobe, his naked collarbones, his paint-laced fingers. The way he stared you down, the way he left you vulnerable and naked with as much as a gaze – and you felt touch starved. His eyes burned on your skin, though it wasn’t sensation enough to satisfy you – you needed more of him. You would always need more of him.
Hyunjin’s eyes followed your figure as you made your way over to him. Without a rush, walking slowly; you bore all the time the world had to offer in your palms, it felt. You walked slowly, yet the scent of the red roses you passed filled Hyunjin’s senses in the breeze your movements created. The floral sensation all around him, your nearing body, your leisure attire, your hazy eyes – he was convinced this moment alone, the sight of you, the golden sun as though casting a halo above your figure, drowning you in warmth and beauty and love, this moment alone was entirely enough to eradicate each and every of his needs, any wish he’s ever wished and any promise he’s ever made; for this moment alone, and your heaven-sent presence was enough to fulfill all. Needs, wishes, promises. If it was you he could look at for eternities, if it was your body he’d have the privilege of holding close for the end of times he would never dare to ask of anything else.
The red paint on Hyunjin’s paper slowly dried out as you finally stood before him. It wasn’t, Hyunjin thought, the roses on the table in a vase which sent their scent across the room, after all – it was you. You smelt of roses. You smelt of vanilla, of red paint, of smoke, of Milan, now that you stood before him, now that he looked up at you, from beneath glasern eyes. You smelt like you, and you smelt like him; traces of his scent and his touch and his promise on your skin, and Hyunjin basked in it.
You didn’t waste much time before you made moves to take a seat on his lap; and not only did Hyunjin realize your attempts momentarily, he also embraced you without as much as hesitation. He found himself drowning in the feeling of your weight on him, allowing you to swallow him whole, allowing you to let your eyes explore. You let them wander from his face to his neck, from his protruding collarbones to his pointy shoulders – the white bathrobe was almost mocking now, doing so little in covering the man that it was nothing but ironic.
And you felt his hands on you, your body. Secure, sure of their position on your hips. Tall fingers, spacey palms; you felt their entirety on your body, and your red heart picked up its’ speed at that.
And you touched him, too. Your hands, cool and soft, found home on his face, each palming a cheek, closing him in. Your thumbs caressed his flush skin, tickled near his eyes, reached towards his parted lips, his hungry lips. Hyunjin looked at you, let you touch him, his face. Let you look at him. Let you make him wait on the kiss he so badly needed, let you bask in him, for he enjoyed nothing more than that.
Your eyes met, and you weren’t sure who granted the first smile, but both your mouths turned upwards, curling into softening features. Roses, red paint, Milan outside the window; though this moment contained of only you and him, and the broken clock, fifteen minutes past four, timelessness. You showed your teeth, your eyes squinting with your smile, and Hyunjin’s were the same.
“Hi.”
A whisper against quiet music and honking cars, angry passengers outside, and Hyunjin reciprocated with a chuckle. Then, a whisper as soft as the prior one, “Hi.”; and he pulled you in. Or maybe he reached for you, longed for you. Or maybe you both moved only enough for your lips to connect, finally, in soft passion. Vigorously, though not in haste, not in roughness. Forcefully, rather, impatiently forceful as you let your tongue dart out of your mouth so it could explore his, and it didn’t take the man as much as a minute to welcome you in, to invite you into himself. And you let your tongue dance with his own, in a waltz, or something faster than that, something less rhythmic – something freer. Your hands stood ground on his body, fingers digging into his shoulder as his dug into your flesh, in covered flesh by your aching hips. Your mouths moved against one another sloppily, and teeth dragging across lips, tongues easing off the sting right after, wet, loud, swallowing any sound which slipped past your throats. Quiet, still timid, breathy sighs which tasted of chocolate and shaky moans which were barely audible against exterior noise. You saw stars behind your eyelids – if because you squeezed them shut so tight it hurt, or because Hyunjin’s touch on your body, the bite he had just placed on your lower lip, and the way he pulled away right after, only for a second, less than that, to admire you with a smile before diving back into you, you weren’t sure, but there were stars all the same. Stars, and Hyunjin, darkening Milan behind the hotel room windows. Fifteen minutes past four. Timelessness.
Hyunjin pulled you closer. Impatience, or simply the need to have you nearer, more flushed against his body than you already were. His hands lay strong on your body, and he pulled you in, your cores coming in contact, hot, ignited, searching for more than this. Than clothed touches, more than the faint feeling of his erection against your sex. More than his hands in your hair, entangling long, warm fingers there, more than his teeth bruising your lips. You’d always want more – and you were glad that Hyunjin was no different. For his hands wandered, and his lips with them, kissing and nibbling where his fingers danced upon – your neck, your shoulders, then, your chest, unbuttoning your shirt one by one, not without a kiss to your skin with every further act of undressing. One button, a kiss, a gaze up to you beneath his lashes, a faint smile, a smug grin at your scrunched brows and staggered breath. Another button, another kiss, and his gaze fell back to your chest, watching your ever-exposing body, so impatient in his seat yet so unrushed. Taking his time. Feeling your bosom rise and fall against his lips, hearing your breath, your sighs, your heartbeat. Feeling hot – your skin was burning, your body was, and Hyunjin with it.
Your shirt was discarded onto the floor. Long forgotten, along with your shorts; Hyunjin’s bathrobe lay leisurely around him, half-opened, only carelessly shoved off his body yet not having borne enough patience to fully free him from it. Though neither of you cared. You let the fabric hang off the chair you were sitting on, the softness of it the only thing touching your skins besides each other's skin. You were closer now, much closer than before, though you barely deemed it possible. You sat right atop Hyunjin’s erection, his right hand resting against your inner thigh – he wasn’t touching yet, only teasing to, and your body grew hotter yet, needier. Your hips searched for friction, your fingers dug into Hyunjin’s scalp with a force which made the man groan out in deep satisfaction, and you kissed him with a fervor enough to move oceans – and he drowned in it, gave into you, kissed you back as feverishly, as messily.
He touched you, too. Finally, eventually, and you muffled a loud moan at the unexpectedness of it. Two fingers against your clit as Hyunjin’s tongue entered your mouth, as he forced your tongue to push against his own – to which you obliged, gladly. You moaned into him as you reciprocated his kiss, grinded your hips into his touch, into his hand. He answered with a sigh, with fingers which increased their speed, with a bite against your lower lip. It ought to hurt by now, your lower lip, with the way he was nibbling at it, though you believed that your body was immune to feel pain in relation to your lover. So, he bit away, nibbled on the sweet spot of your neck, on the lobe of your ear only to moan right into it, to send shivers down the entirety of your body, and you let him. And there was no better feeling, you believed.   
You disconnected your lips from his. There was a second where his mouth searched for yours, where his body hadn’t yet registered the emptiness your parting left, but then he looked at you, leaned back in his chair, eyes glassy, fingers circling around your clit slowly, mindlessly. As though it was a bodily reaction, an instinct. As though he wasn’t actively aware of his movements at all. His breath hitched in his throat, and he looked a mess – pupils blown out, eyes dark as night, hair disheveled, mouth red and puffed and bruising. There were faint love bites blooming on his neck already, ones that would turn a deep red, or a deep purple by the next morning. The sun had almost set behind the horizon, was casting its’ last, weak rays upon the planet – and those last, weak rays of golden light seemed all to land on the man beneath you. He shone, almost golden himself, chest and cheeks flushed red, and he was glowing. Glowing in the way he looked at you, glowing the smile he granted you, genuine, true. He waited on you, waited on a kiss, or on something else, something more, maybe. Yet he let you stare at him, let you admire him in the last, weak rays of sunshine that seemed to have been saved up for him, solely – and then you kissed him, unable to resist wide eyes and longing mouth, and he kissed you back. Touched you, and you let your hands wander down his body, not missing a single line on it, not missing an inch before your hand palmed his crotch. You could sit and kiss him forever, could bask in him and his body for eternity – but you were impatient, too, especially when it came to him, to your lover. When it was him, you lost control of yourself, of your body, of your soul. It belonged to him entirely, all of it.
He let you sink onto him. Hyunjin let you bury your face in the sweatiness of his neck, in its’ sensitivity, let you groan out into his ear as you felt him bottom out entirely. He let you adjust to him, and you let him hold you, against him, against his body, your heart against his own, chest to chest. You let him whisper sweet nothings, promises, and confessions, and entire worlds. You loved his never tiring tongue in moments of intimacy – he talked and talked and talked, words sweeter than honey could ever be, and sounds more sinful than anything you’d ever known.
You screamed out when he moved. Thrusting his hips into your own, up and deeper inside of you, and you struggled to keep your composure. Your arms snug tightly around his body, around his neck, pulling him impossibly closer – you melted into one as he kept moving into you, both hands keeping a steady position on your hips, to hold you in place, or to grant you stability, or to grant himself some. And the room erupted into a symphony of your voices, of your moans and grunts and sighs, whispers and whines of each other’s names. Your senses filled with everything that was him – his voice, deep and longing and loud in your ear, his hand bruising your flesh, groping at you so harshly you saw stars, his scent, his golden body, his mouth on your skin. Everything was him, his erection so very deep within you that it almost hurt, though not quite, his right hand which suddenly found its’ way to your clit again. Drawing figures eight there impatiently as his hips grew frantic, slowly losing rhythm.
Your body ignited. It was hot, it was wet and a mess, and it was fifteen minutes past four. The broken clock on the wall behind Hyunjin capturing you two in its’ timelessness, in its infinity. It had stopped solely for you, for your love, for your souls. Your eyes closed shut when Hyunjin bit against your neck, when his teeth grazed your skin just deep enough to not break it, to not draw blood, and you came against his body in shaking waves, with a broken moan which was swallowed by the man in an instant. You felt him fill you up as he groaned into the kiss, as he let his tongue enter your mouth in lazy manner, careless now of sloppiness, of the lack of coordination. He held you close, he thrusted into you tiredly, he let you hold him. He let you kiss him, just as tired, just as lazy, basking in him, in his taste, in his scent.
Milan was beautiful. Night began to drown the city in darkness, buildings and trees, cars and people and the world losing color, quieting down. But it was still fifteen minutes past four – and you sat in Hyunjin’s hold for an eternity longer, in hushed giggles and shy confessions, and loved each other throughout the entirety of the night.
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luveline · 10 days
Note
bombshell finds tickets to a russian movie thing sitting in spencer’s desk at work and they’re about to like run out (?) so she presents them to spencer and asks him on a date and pretends that she didn’t just pull them out of spencers desk in that bombshell way
You’re looking for gum. If Spencer were at his desk, you’d politely beg for a stick and he’d give it to you, but he’s not here, so you must search. 
You sit in his seat, slinking down as he does with poor posture, your kitten heels hitting the spine of a book kept under the desk. Your dress’ skirt rises up your thighs, the fabric at your neck pulls, but you have bigger problems. You’re feeling the weird franticness of unspent energy and only a stick of gum is gonna fix you. 
He has a drawer full of things, neatness traded for space. Blue and pink paper clips in an arrowhead shaped box. Push pins of all colours, their box more ordinary. He has a travel book on indigenous North American birds with stamps held between the pages, a plastic bottle cap, train stubs from Quantico to the station outside of his apartment and a bottle of ibuprofen missing half of its contents. 
Your fingers dig around for the familiar shape of a packet of gum, hesitating thoughtfully against the thread of a thicker cardstock. 
You pull a cream envelope from the desk and, perhaps wrongfully, unveil the contents: two tickets to see any Russian flick at the foreign language theatre free of charge (if you buy a large drink). They expire tonight. 
You press them to your chest and spin in Spencer’s chair without any regard for whoever might see you slouching. Across the office with his hair out of his face and a smile bordering lackadaisical stands your favourite. He even has a pencil in hand. He likes to underline things in the books he reads for your benefit. It’s the pencil that decides your next move. 
You stand up, brushing down your nice dress that he seems to like, a black cotton with thin pinstripes settling nicely just above your knees. You check your lipstick in the black reflection of his sleeping monitor, buzzing. 
He’s watching you when you turn back. You hide the tickets behind your hip and begin a light walk to his side, the chug of the printer a constant hum you can feel in your shoes. 
“What’s up?” he asks. 
You tilt your head toward your shoulder ever so slightly. “Can I ask you something?” 
“Sure.” He squints. “You’re acting strange.” 
“Suspicious,” you correct. 
“That, too.” 
“How come you let me hold your hand?” 
Spencer doesn’t hide his surprise at your question very well. His eyes turn deer in the headlights, then down to the printer. “What do you mean?” he asks. 
“When we first met, you wouldn’t shake my hand. And that’s okay,” —your smile is loving in the hope that he finds your question as the curiosity it is and not an interrogation— “I’m just wondering what changed.” 
“I was distracted.” He’s talking about the first time you took his hand, the two of you on the way to the office. “You stopped me from being late.” 
“Right, but I should’ve asked and I didn’t. And now we hold hands all the time.” You take a half step back. “I’m not trying to embarrass you, I’m just wondering.”
“Nobody’s held my hand in a really long time. And you’re mostly clean.” 
“Mostly!” you laugh, giving him a guilty smile. “I’m super clean, I just forget how gross door handles are sometimes.”
You have embarrassed him, in a way. It’s really not what you meant to do, not when you’re about to ask him on a date. 
Ever since you started your official position at the BAU, you and Spencer have grown closer, but there’s a difference between flirting because he’s lovely and flirting because you want him to be your boyfriend. (Not that he knows what you want.) You shouldn’t have started with the hand holding thing. 
“Spencer.” 
“Yeah?” 
“Will you go on a date with me?” You present him with the movie tickets. “Got these, they expire tonight…”
“Are those from my desk?” he asks, taking the tickets from you to look over closely. 
“I’d love to go with you, unless you’re gonna take someone else, which is fine.” You embarrass yourself a little, even though you’re not, hoping it makes up for the hand-holding investigation. “Yeah, they’re from your desk. Sorry. I really wanted a stick of gum, my– my nervous energy is through the roof today.” 
Spencer frowns at you again. “How come?” he asks softly. 
“I don’t know. It just happens sometimes.” 
And that’s nothing you’ve ever admitted to him. Your perfect mask is broken, and Spencer doesn’t look at you any differently. “Do you actually wanna go to the movies?” he asks. 
“Only if I’m not stealing you away from somebody else.” 
“There’s no one else.”
Spencer abruptly turns his attention to the printer, where he collects his copies and shuffles them into a straight, neat pile. 
You recover quickly, though inside your heart is a stuttering mess. “I should hope not,” you say. “Okay. Awesome. I’ll bring hand sanitiser and you can hold my hand through the previews.” 
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milkyhoneybee · 8 months
Text
Unethical magic friend who uses you to solve their problems without asking you or considering your comfort
They ran out of milk for their morning coffee? They snap their fingers and suddenly your tits are massive and leaking milk. They take what they need and don't bother changing you back until they remember hours or days later, even if you try to remind them they just wave you off saying 'sure, sure, I just need to finish working out this summoning circle' and get distracted again
Sometimes they read something in a book that gets them horny or there's something they couldn't figure out, or they just pass someone in the market who takes their fancy, so guess who's helping them recreate it? You lose track of the amount of times you've been turned into the current object of their desires-- you don't even remember what your original hair colour was at this point, though you think you're mostly the same as you were when they change you back... but, enough subtle differences over time can build up...
Not to mention the times you've ended up with tentacles or horns or fangs or a foot long tongue, genitals of every configuration, or been transformed into slime and used just for their pleasure, or, more humiliatingly, been used in some test or experiment, or used to get spell ingredients
You would leave, you think, even if it didn't usually feel so good you lose control of yourself, but you didn't realise how binding a mage's "friendship bracelets" were when you first accepted it when you became friends, and now even if you do go anywhere, they can summon you back without trouble
They just conjure you some souvenir or some kind of 'treat' if you complain, and you feel your cheeks flush with the patronising nature of it. None of your complaints are ever taken seriously
Sometimes they'll summon a demon or other creature either for information or for some task, and you've ended up being used as payment or to placate them. You start drooling and going weak at the knees whenever you smell succubus milk or incubus cum from the amount of times you've been exposed to it already-- you're honestly worried it'll become an addiction before too long...
The one time you tried to sabotage one of your friends spells, hoping they'd get a taste of their own medicine, and while at first it was satisfying seeing their look of panic when the magic went awry, it didn't last long...
When you looked at their spell book and saw they were trying to create an armour spell as strong as dragon scales, you figured out just what your interference had caused, watching those glistening sapphire scales spread along their growing, shifting limbs, long claws growing in, a tail stretching out behind them, horns and wings starting to form
Unfortunately, your friend was still conscious enough to realise it was you that had caused the issue, and they had no qualms about 'punishing' you for it
Increasingly they grew larger and stronger than you, long maw full of sharp fangs and a wicked tongue grinning as they pinned you down under one paw. The tongue that shoved itself inside you was larger than some of the cocks you'd taken before, making you squeal and writhe, body shaking when the edge of claws sent little trickles of blood down your thighs and sides. They pressed you down harder into the floor, growling like a thunderstorm and started fucking their tongue into you. Suddenly, their haunches were over your face, their serpentine body much more flexible and longer than their human one, and your eyes widened at the sight of the cock hanging heavy and flushed, pushing past the split of scales between their legs
Even trying to keep your mouth closed didn't save you, your draconic friend simply smothering you with their cock until you were forced to take a breath, and after letting you get a little air, they took the opportunity to ram their cock straight down your throat. You can't fight back at all as they fill you from both ends, feeling like a toy being hollowed out
Their cock is covered in ridges and the slick confines of your throat drag against them in a way that, from what you can still manage to piece together due to the lack of consistent air, must feel good. They even get their tail wrapped around your throat, making your watering eyes roll up as they tighten their hold
You pass out, of course
Thankfully, they must have pulled out before the lack of air completely did you in (though you have no way to tell, perhaps they could still cast necromantic magic in dragon form?) but you come to in fits and starts, finally piecing enough of yourself together when you're being held in both of their front paws, your hole stretched and leaking around their cock as they bounce you up and down its length
From the way your belly sloshes, and how sticky your legs are (not to mention the rest of you, you assume), you can guess they've already cum in you a few times while you were out cold
When the draconic mage finally finishes with you, you're left slumped over, face half laying in a puddle of cum and you don't think you'll ever not smell like it or if you'll ever taste anything else again. You don't know if you can even talk any more from having your throat so thoroughly fucked. Not to mention if your holes will recover after being stretched out and absolutely ruined on that massive dragon cock...
Of course, leaving them a dragon doesn't seem like a good idea for anyone. Once you get enough energy and brain cells to rub together, and manage to clean up a bit, you get herded over to their spell book. They eventually nudge you and manage to gesture, growl, and, at times, roughly manipulate you, until you can brew a potion to change them back
Once they're back on two legs? 'Well, that was fun, wasn't it?'
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americaswritings · 6 months
Text
Voices of Roses and Ruin | Part II
Warnings: I haven't read the book (yet), Coriolanus thoughts, mentions of poverty, mentions of violence
Summary: Coriolanus thought he would never see you again after you won the Games and he got banished to the districts. But when he does, he is left to question whether or not he can imagine a life with(out) you.
Words: around 2k
Pairing: Young Coriolanus Snow x reader
A/N: You all asked for it so here it is: Part 2! Thank you so much for all the love on the first one. It truly blew me away!! I really hope you like this part just as much. I tried to capture Coriolanus inner conflict here. Also there will be a third and final part! :)
Can be read as Lucy Gray x Coriolanus Snow here
Part I | Masterlist
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He hadn't thought he would ever see you again. Not after the gamemaster had sent for him once the games were over and he had found the evidence against him placed on a table.
Evidence that he had helped you, although the rules forbid it.
He had known. There was no denying that and it was below his dignity to pretend so. There was nothing he could say. Nothing he could do except stare at that evidence and wonder if it had been worth it.
If you had been worth it. Ruining his life.
As he had watched you crumble under his painfilled screams in the arena he had been sure to have ruined yours, but now he figured it might have been mutual.
It was what happened in the games, was a part of it. Only he had never been one and there was a sick feeling inside of him as he thought of how he had been used, had used you, had used resources to save you despite the knowledge that it crossed a line.
It was easy to watch the games and all the ways they manipulated people. Turned children into killers and brought out the deepest, darkest parts of humans. How they got manipulated in turn, by the gamemakers and the capitol. Even their mentors. And sometimes how they manipulated the public and the capitol in an act of quiet revolution.
It was oddly fascinating in a way, to see through those lies and perceptions and untangle them. Like they were all pieces on a chess board and he just had to watch them push each other around, taking out one by one.
But to find out that he had been a part of it too, that he had been played made him feel like just another pawn.
But you had won. Even if he would pay the price for it now, he had gotten you through the games. It filled him with pride and a little...relief to know that he had kept his promise.
He hated not knowing if you were safe now, but at least he had held his word. If something happened to you now, it wasn't on him.
But then why was there no comfort in that thought?
Why did there seem to be no comfort ever again, with you gone and his life torn to shreds. All his hopes and dreams crushed within one night.
Had it been worth it?
It didn't matter if he had done it for the scholarship or to save you. But then why did he suddenly feel filled with doubts?
All his life there had only been two colours: black and white. There was no grey, because he firmly believed in wright or wrong. He thought it pathetic when people weeped over the games and how tragic they were, yet found the uttermost entertainment in them.
The games served a purpose and they promised him one of his own, a university career, so he served them. It didn’t matter what he thought about it.
But now he seemed captured in between those two opposites. He knew rationally that it had been wrong to manipulate your chances so you could win. And he saw now where it had gotten him.
But wouldn't he do the same again?
Being with you, gazing into your eyes and wishing you were by his side was wrong. You came from two different worlds and the odds were against you. But then how had he turned into this man, thinking about a woman, letting his feelings guide his decisions and cloud his judgement?
And it went beyond the grey.
When you had stepped into his life you had introduced colours to it he had never seen before.
Red, not the university red, but the colours of your lips, the blood driping down your arms.
Blue, not the lifeless district blue, but the dress you had worn when you had sang during your interview and he haid laid in a hospital bed, mesmerized by your every word and sound.
Brown, the colour of dirt and poverty, but seemed to exist in uncountable shades on you.
And now that had all been ripped from him, just because he had played smarter than the other students.
His days as a peacekeeper were as dull and lonely as he had expected. He kept his gaze narrow, his weapon close and he didn't let his mind wander.
Because then he would mourn all he had lost and it would turn to anger. Fury. A turmoil of emotion he didn't know how to handle.
Sometimes he wondered if his life had only existed in polarity before and you had shown him spectra and ranges he had never learned to balance.
And it made him mad. At you. Because how dare you show him what love and lust felt like, how light it made him feel and how there seemed nothing else to exist in his thoughts anymore, only to rip it all away and show him the other side of it. The loss and the grief, the uncertanity and fear. The lacking.
Sometimes he wondered if he was going mad. Here he was damned to a life in the districts, a simple life, despite knowing he had been born for big things. It was in the name. Snow lands on top.
He pretended to be numb and hollow on the outside, but inside of him raged a storm of emotions that broke him bit by bit. Soon there would be not much left of his pride. To his sanity.
He had convinced himself he wasn't thinking about you anymore.
That his dreams of you were just evidence of his growing madness. And that the hopelessness he felt when he persuaded himself you were likely somewhere far away and not thinking of him anymore didn't exist.
But all the lies he had build opon came crashing down when he caught a glance of that blue, that red and brown and he knew. Knew without a doubt.
His hand was locked around your wrist before he could think about the movement and he dragged you away and into a dark alley, his big hand clasped over your mouth to swallow your screams and his body trapping yours against the wall.
His gaze flickered around to make sure no one saw you, then he allowed himself to look at you.
Your eyes were wide open, staring at him in a mixture of shock, fear and disbelief. Carefully he lowered his hand, his hand tangling in your hair. He had always wanted to do that.
But he didn't step away. He needed to make sure this was real, that you were real. “You're here."
You swallowed, eyes flickering over his face and then the uniform. You frowned, then carefully touched his head. "Your hair- it's gone."
"Not completely."
"It's short." You smiled and he felt his lips curve into one as well, all previous anger swallowed by the reality that you were here. That he hadn't lost everything. He had you know.
"Why are you here? Why are you one of them?" He ignored the way your tone changed and you practically spit out the word. "They found out how I helped you. It was against the rules."
He couldn't keep to himself any longer, not after he had fantasised about you for so long and his hand travelled over your neck, your jaw, cupped your cheek.
Finally, you were his.
He would have leaned down and kissed you, but the look in your eyes stopped him. "I thought you were hurt. I- I thought you were dead!"
Tears were shimmering in the soft light that the moon cast over your face and he caught them and wiped them away with his thumb when they spilled over your cheeks.
"It wasn't my voice in the arena. They used the birds to-" "I know that!" You let out a breath. "But everything they said- you said that to me. Word by word."
He waited silently for you to continue. "But then the screams-" "They weren't real", he tried to soothe you, but you shook your head. "But if everything else was, then...", you trailled of, but he knew what you thought anyway.
"They manipulated you. That's why they used my real words against you, to convince you that it was really me, my voice, so that you would believe everything."
"So they didn't-" You looked at him with so much fear that he almost smiled. "They didn't do anything to me. I sat there watching like I did the whole time."
"But then...how they did to it? And how did they listen to us all this time?"
He knew what you were really asking. Had he known? Had he known about it, but never thought it important enough to mention or worse had he intentionally not told you, because of his own motifs?
Shaking his head slightly he let out a sigh. "I don't know", he admittted. "How do they do anyting?"
You looked at him a second longer before nodding, deciding that you would trust him.
His hand ran down your arms now and he noted in satisfaction that you shivered under the touch. He was sure it had nothing to do with the cold.
"Where were you? After you won?"
After he had yelled at the game master to let you out. Many times.
"Here and there." You shrugged, but he wanted to know more. Needed to know more.
“That's not enough."
Would it ever be? Now that he was in the district and you were here too. Was that enough?
It wasn't the big house, the uniform and status. It wasn't Tigris smile. And it wasn't power.
It was just you and him, a whole lot of dirt, hunger and sickness. Lacking. Was that a life he could settle for?
Until now this had only been a station in his life. He would get back to the capitol and claim what belonged to him or else he would not see a future for himself.
But now things were different.
"I didn‘t know where to go. I thought after the games my life would be different, but I am still here and everything's the same except that I'm a killer.“
You closed your eyes and an expression of pain crossed your face. He let out a breath as he tried to soothe away the frown. "Don't say that." "But it's true." You looked at him with loathing in your eyes.
"You gave me the tools to kill and I used them. We’re both guilty."
"So? Everyone is. It's what needed to be done." He didn't get your fuss. All that mattered was you and him and you had gotten that.
"I would still make the same choices." "You would?" He nodded. "You matter more than them."
You frowned, heaviness in your eyes. "I don't." "To me you do."
It was true. He didn't know much, didn't understand these new feelings, but this one thing he could promise you was the truth.
Closing your eyes you leaned your foreheads against each other's, finding a glimmer of peace in each others presence. "To me you do too."
It was barely above a whisper, but he opened his eyes to search yours. For a moment you were locked in each other's gazes, but even though it felt like it in this moment, you would never have all the time in the world.
Cupping your cheek a final time Coriolanus closed the distance between you.
Your lips were dry and tasted a little like salt where the tears had touched them, but he savoured the feeling. Your body was trapped between the wall and his and he wanted to explore every part of it, make you completely and utterly his.
The kiss was all shades and ranges of colour he didn‘t know existed and he only knew he wanted more of it. It was addicting, this new feeling that only you seemed to hold the key to.
When you broke apart a sad smile hung on your lips. Before he could ask you about it you cast your eyes down. "They are talking about us. In the capitol. When they used your voice and I...fell for it- they made it into a whole story."
He closed his eyes. He had considered that possibility, yet he hated how he felt the control slipping from him. He had always contained an image and now he felt like other people were deciding it.
"They will forget about it." "They won't. You know it. I can't ever go back."
When he opened his eyes again he saw shock and understanding in yours. "But you...want to go back", you concluded and he didn't deny it. It had always been the scholarship for him, the way up.
He was a Snow, born into greatness. It was his duty to claim what should have been his all along.
You ducked away and took a step to the side, bringing a distance between your bodies he hated.
"This is not my life." You knew that, didn‘t you? Or had you expected him to give up everything for what…love? This feeling of lightness and colour and sweetness?
Even if it gave him a flicker of lust and the power he yearned for, it was not the same.
Because even if your love was strong enough, it would never exist without hunger, worry and a job below his worth. And he was tired, so tired of living like that.
That was why he had taken on the mentorship in the first place. Why he had even gone to such lengths to get the public to pay attention to you and then to save you.
For a different life. A better one. A life in the district was far from it.
Your eyes flickered around as you took in your own district. The one he had spent his last money on just for the possibility to see you again.
And you were standing right in front of him, yet you seemed even farer away now than you had in the arena.
"But it's mine."
Silence settled between you as both of you considered the meaning of your words.
"So all of this...for nothing? You say all these things to me, that you won't let me die and that I'm different and then you break the rules to save me only for what?!"
You shook your head furiously. Desperately. "So you can go back to the capitol and pretend this never happened?!"
He should have felt outrage, but for the first time since he had been sent to the gamemaster and learned his fate he felt numb inside.
"No."
You stared at him in bewilderment, your face a portrayal of the storm of emotion he had felt trapped inside of him for so long. "I would never pretend", he took a stride towards you.
“You changed me. And I think I changed you."
His hands found your face again and to his own surprise you let it happen. "We belong with each other."
You stared at him, a deep sadness in your eyes as you silently shook your head.
"Only not in this world", you whispered, ducking away from his touch and disappearing into the shadows without another word.
He stood there, staring at the spot you had vaished, a part of him leaving with you.
Part 3
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HI SWEETIE I HAVE A REQUEST!! i hope you dont mind!
so, bucky and f!reader, maybe married and they have a baby together. after that time of recovery reader is a bit shy of her own body cause it's been a while since they did it and she isnt back at her pre-pregnancy weight and bucky is absolutely like mind blown by her beauty? like, nearly drooling? and please can you add body worship on this?
i seriously hope it's okay for you, but if it's not please ignore this!
HII BBY!! I love love love it. thank you for requesting, hope you like it💌
DEFLECTION.
​bucky barnes x fem!reader (married & parents) — comfort
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word count. 1031
disclaimer. the hair colour and type has no significance to the writing. the gif just suits the theme of this fic. also please read the ask carefully
Only a few short months ago, you gave birth to a healthy baby girl - a daughter you shared with your husband, Bucky. Very quickly she became the sole focus of your attention, neither of you having much time to do anything like you used to. 
Consequently, your sex life had taken a hit, and not because of the significant decrease in quality time, but instead something far more complex.
So far, motherhood has been a slight struggle to adjust to - the differences in your life between then and now are almost stark. You've been trying to adapt to all the changes that come with it, the main being your new body. You've been feeling shy and insecure with your new shape, often feeling like the weight will never drop off to what you looked like before.
It was hard to digest the change.
You were in the bathroom to freshen up, your eyes looking back at you in the mirror almost pitifully - your gaze travelling down, honing in on your stomach through your once baggy tee.
"They're here," Bucky calls from the other room, his voice putting a hold on the thoughts in your mind.
You step out of the bathroom, meeting your husband and daughter by the front door, a pink baby bag slung over his shoulder.
He notices the downcast direction of your eyes, seeing the way you tried to pull away from his attention. "Everything okay?" he asks you, rocking his little girl in his arms, bouncing her when she makes a noise.
You hum, walking closer to say goodbye to your baby - running a finger over her soft cheek. 
He doesn't believe you, though he waits for it to be just the two of you before he can question it. He doesn't want to create a situation before your parents arrive to pick up your daughter. They offered to have her for a few hours to give you both some respite.
The second the door closes, and it's just the two of you again, he turns to look at you - his brows curled up inquisitively.
"Now, what's really going on?" he asks, referring to all those times you shut yourself off from him - primarily that one a few minutes ago.
You turn away, heading to the kitchen to get a drink. "Going on with what?" you deflect, trying to avoid the topic.
He follows you, standing behind you at the sink - his arms wrapping around your middle, chin resting over your shoulder. 
But he's too close to where you don't want him, so you flinch at his touch, moving his hands away from your tummy and stretching the hem of your top - pulling on the fabric.
Bucky rips his hands from you, your avoidance of his touch making things whirl in his mind. "You don't like that anymore?" he asks, stepping aside to face the side of you.
"I do... just— just not right now," you reply, taking a quick sip of water before moving across the kitchen - heading towards the fridge. "Tired, feel gross," you shrug, trying to ease the tension you accidentally created. 
"That's not it," he softly shakes his head, eyes focused on you even though every glance goes unreciprocated. "It's something else."
"Just need a nap and shower," you partially lie, pulling out two apples, handing him one.
He doesn't accept your attempt at deflection, instead turning it down. "No, it's something else," he continues, his eyes glued to the side of your face. "And you're afraid of saying it."
"I'm not," you softly protest, voice quiet.
"So it is something else," he mutters, the unknown confession of you making things easier for him, harder for you.
You're cornered. You sigh and nod faintly, closing the door of the fridge. 
"What is it? Please talk to me," he reaches for your hand, fingers wrapping themselves around yours. "It's just the two of us, no distractions... what's been going on?"
"It's hard to get used to," you start, pausing to think of what to say next.
"What is? Being a mom?" he asks, noticing your focused gaze on the baby stuff on the counter. 
You nod, pausing once more. "Not just that," you exhale, shrugging. "Everything's changed."
"With us?" he asks, hand tightening in yours. 
"With me," you correct, looking down at your hand in his. "I've changed, and I'm not used to it... I don't like it."
"How have you changed?" he questions, trying to prompt more answers from you. 
"My body has," you softly reply, trying not to squirm at your confession. "My boobs, tummy, my hair. The weight is taking longer to come off than I thought, and I feel— I feel like a..." you go quiet, not wanting to finish your sentence.
However, Bucky's not done coaxing words from you. His face softens when you finally meet his gaze, his features inviting and knowing. "Feel like a what?" he whispers.
"I don't know," you shrug again.
"'You are not your thoughts'," he says, reciting those words you've said to him countless times after his nightmares. Though now he's repurposing them to someone else who needs them, you. "I repeat that saying in my head all the time. Do you know who taught me that?" he asks, his gaze honing in on you - trying to stop you from looking away.
"Me," you whisper. 
"That's right," he nods, bringing his spare hand to cup your cheek. "You need to use that same kindness to yourself. And right now," he starts, pressing a kiss into your lips. "You have never looked more beautiful to me."
You softly frown, the rest of your features relaxing.
"Your body gave us a daughter," he smiles. "You made her. You may or may not get your ‘old body back.’ But the one you have now is perfect too.”
"Thank you," your voice cracks, the sweet words of your lover soothing all the doubts in your mind. You envelop him in an embrace, arms hugging around him in the ways you've recently longed for. "I mean it."
His arms wrap around you just as tight, one hand running up your spine. "So do I.”
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wheeboo · 2 months
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hi (i love you) | xu minghao
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SYNOPSIS. in which you take a trip through random glimpses of your growing relationship with minghao. PAIRING. xu minghao x gn!reader (ft. a mention of jihoon, and gyu and seokmin very briefly) GENRE. fluff, strangers to friends to lovers, established relationship, college au WARNINGS. hao is a year or two older than reader, drinking and reader getting drunk, kissing, terms of endearment at the end, the last scene is a lil suggestive WORD COUNT. 5.5k
notes: yes. this is literally just a compilation fic of them saying hi. ty zanna @slytherinshua for reading this over for me <3 there's like significant time skips between each section - just a lil sum to keep in mind cuz i dont wanna cause confusion or anything 😭😭😭 i find hao the hardest member to write for, so i hope i was able to characterize him well here!
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i. "hi." (fallow is the colour of dryness to my mouth when your eyes met mine.)
There's no way in hell you're going to let yourself be lost on the first day of university.
It's embarrassing enough accidentally waking up past your alarm and having barely any time to freshen up as much as you would like, so right now, you couldn't afford another disaster.
Taking a deep breath, you double-check your schedule and the layout of the campus on your phone, trying to match it with the signs around you. The different buildings and hallways of the campus seem like a maze in of itself, and you can feel the slight panic course up your veins. A sea of students rush past you, seemingly confident in their strides towards their own classes. A defeated sigh leaves you.
All you had to do was find the stupid art hallway.
You clench your phone tighter, your iron grip practically burning a hole through the screen. The campus map app wasn't making any more sense now than it did a minute ago. Frustration stings painfully at your eyes, but begging the earth to swallow you whole wouldn't get you to class any faster, so you force yourself to scan the crowd. There's bound to be at least someone who knows where it is and is willing to help you.
And so, your eyes catch sight of the first figure appearing conveniently in your peripheral vision𑁋a boy, dressed in a casual fallow-coloured flannel with a backpack casually slung over one of his shoulders, earphones in his ears, and peering down at something on his phone just like you were doing minutes ago (though he seems to be having a much better time than you)𑁋which was somehow enough for your feet to bolt you towards as if it had a mind of its own.
You feel the root of your nerves creep up your legs and branch up to your neck as you approach him, realising at this point, there's no turning back now. You tap him lightly on the shoulder, bracing yourself for a possible eye roll or annoyed sigh.
His eyes widen in surprise before settling on you, and at that moment, something strikes hard at whatever rehearsed lines you had in your head. It was all gone in a simple snap, from a simple look from him𑁋soft yet sharp brown eyes framed by dark lashes peering at you with a hint of surprise, fluffy dark hair showering down his neck and forehead a little, a dainty pair of silver earrings glinting at his ears. His whole face seems to hold a warmth that somehow eases a bit of the knot in your chest, but certainly not the one in your throat.
You open your mouth, but all the words die on your tongue. The air hangs heavy with a sudden awkwardness, and you can practically feel your cheeks burning. Maybe you should just turn around and pretend this never happened.
But then, you notice the way his lips lift up just slightly, and it makes your stomach do a flip. He glances down at his phone for a second, takes off his earphones, then brings his attention back at you.
"Hi," is all he says, and maybe, just maybe, your heart stops a little bit. It's just a simple word, but the way he says it𑁋all soft, quiet, a tad bit hesitant𑁋makes the fabric of your shirt feel tight on your body.
You didn't notice you were clenching your fists until you force them to relax at your side, clearing your throat in the process.
"Hi," You manage back nervously, surprised at how breathless you sound. "Sorry, I-I don't mean to intrude. It's just... Do you happen to know where the art hallway is? I'm trying to find my photography class."
You watch the way he tucks a loose strand of hair behind his ear, unveiling more of a view of his piercings. He gazes briefly behind you at the clusters of other students gradually spilling into different hallways, hushing the space where the two of you stood. Then he returns his attention back to you, his expression softening slightly.
"You're not that far off," he comments, seemingly amused. "I was just heading there myself too."
"Really? That's a relief. The campus map is awful and confusing, and I swear this place was designed on purpose for you to get lost in, you know? And being lost on the first day is just..." You quickly shut your mouth up from your rambling, letting your voice fade into an embarrassed chuckle instead.
Your gaze falls to the ground for a moment, and when you pick your head back up to look at him, you catch a glimpse of the small curve that he has at his lips, barely a hint of a smile playing there. It's a small detail, but suddenly it feels like the most important thing in the world, and it throws your train of thought completely off track. He doesn't seem bothered by your little habit of rambling (admittedly, because of nerves), thankfully. Instead, he lets out a soft laugh, the sound washing over you like a warm summer breeze.
You can't help but sheepishly grin back, feeling a certain lightness bloom within your chest that probably has nothing to do with the weight of your backpack suddenly seeming lighter as well.
"It's okay," he reassures, voice as quiet and gentle as his gaze. "Everyone gets lost here sometimes. I've been there."
He starts walking, and you hesitate for a second before falling into step beside him. There's a small part of you urging to get to know him, as if this was the only opportunity to do so, but all the words you want to say sound clumsy and loud compared to the easy peacefulness that surrounds him.
And honestly, it feels... nice.
The hallway he leads you in is perhaps more than just a simple art hallway, the intoxicating scent of oil paint and clay blend together in the air. Paintings by students and faculty of every style imaginable line the walls, some bursting with vibrant colours, others muted and contemplative. Sculptures poke out from odd corners, and bulletin boards are overflowed with announcements of upcoming exhibitions and workshops, even though the year just started.
"Welcome to the art hallway," he beckons you casually and welcomingly, as if only this portion of the campus was a separate entity than others.
You let out a breath you didn't realise you were holding in. "Thank you so much. Wow, this place is, um..." You stop yourself from continuing on, zipping your mouth shut. "I owe you. Oh, I'm Y/N, by the way. If there's anything I can𑁋"
"There's no need." He waves a hand dismissively at your offer, and for a second you feel something inside you sink, but the small hint of a smile to his face chases that feeling away just a little. "And it's Minghao... yeah. I'll see you around."
Before you can say anything more, you watch as he turns himself around and swiftly enters inside the room standing right behind him. A painting class.
(You are eight minutes late to class when a near-clear picture on the wall catches your gaze. It looks like a picture of Minghao standing next to a particularly vibrant painting of abstract art, and your heart swells just a little bit more.)
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ii. "hi." (laurel is the colour of the grass that you lay on with me, gazing up at the same sky together.)
There was a time during Minghao's first year of college where a friend of his𑁋Lee Jihoon is his name𑁋called him crazy and bonkers for spending majority of his day outdoors rather than inside. Obviously, Minghao didn't exactly care, nor was it insulting in the slightest knowing Jihoon's stubbornness and tendency to stay holed up in his room buried under piles of music textbooks.
But he would be lying if he said he didn't appreciate the outdoors more than anything else, like from the way the sun kisses upon his skin, the gentle breeze that caresses his face, and the colours of nature that found him at his lowest times. Minghao thinks that's how he got into painting and art in the first place, though he didn't dwell on it too much. It all just came natural to him. He likes to think it that way𑁋that it found him instead.
The scenery of the campus is his oasis. He can do his own thing while others are walking through their own lives. He can sit outside for as long as he wants until dusk settles in and paints the sky with hues of orange and pink, or until the stars twinkle above and remind him that he's just an utter speck in the universe.
Today is no different.
Minghao finds himself sprawled out on the grass near the art building, sketchbook propped up against his bent knees, brow furrowed in concentration as he tries to capture the way the afternoon sunlight filters through the leaves of a nearby tree in his line of sight.
A low breeze runs through the air, stirring a few strands of hair across his forehead. He brushes them back absentmindedly, just as a sound cracks into the quietness.
"Hi!"
Minghao shoots his eyes up, slightly startled from the unexpected greeting. He catches sight of you slowly approaching up to him, a hesitant smile gracing your lips as you stop a few feet away.
"Hi," he replies, voice soft as he notices the way you're fiddling with something behind your back. "Vending machine did its ol' thing again?"
"Can you always read my mind?" You murmur, teasing annoyance biting at your words, but you can't contain the smile to your face either way. Maybe he can read your mind, but he's just skimming over it instead. "I can take it if you prefer to die from dehydration."
Minghao chuckles lightly. He glances down at the water bottle in your hand, then back at you, lingering for a beat longer than necessary. There's a flicker of amusement in his dark eyes, but also a hint of something𑁋maybe surprise, mischief, or perhaps a touch of shyness.
(You don't catch the way he subconsciously pushes the other water bottle he had stashed earlier deeper into his backpack.)
"Thanks." He accepts the water bottle from your hand, his fingers brushing against yours for a second, and takes a quick sip to cool his slightly parched throat.
Then he sets the water bottle down beside him, patting the grass next to him invitingly.
Without a word, you take a deep breath and lower yourself down onto the grass next to him. You catch the scent of the fresh paint lingering on his clothes and blending with the earthy aroma of the grass beneath you. The sunlight catches on the side of his face, highlighting some strands of hair flying in the breeze and the silver earrings reflecting in his ears.
There's a small groan that leaves you when you get yourself to lay fully down on the grass, using your backpack as a makeshift pillow. Minghao just peers in your direction curiously, a faint smile playing at the corners of his lips as he watches you settle in.
"You know," You sigh, letting out a contented breath as you spread your arms out a little, fixing your eyes up towards the sky. "This is actually really nice, hanging outside and all, but I am so out of shape. You pick the worst spots."
Minghao's smile widens a fraction at your words. He shifts his own gaze to the sky, observing as the clouds drift lazily overhead, fingertips kneading at the laurel-coloured grass below. The soft yet vibrant green reminds him of a new set of paints he recently bought.
"I think you'll survive lying on a patch of grass, Y/N."
"Not if I get up and there's a goddamn earthworm crawling in my ear, Hao."
"Just don't fall asleep, and you'll live."
You let out a giggle, though you wouldn't be lying if you said that the warmth hitting your body was making you feel just the tiniest bit of drowsy. "No promises there."
The silence that lingers between you and Minghao isn't uncomfortable, but it's not exactly filled with chatter either. It's a comfortable silence, with the distant sounds of other students laughing like white noise and the occasional rustle of a breeze flying past your ears.
It's always like this when you're here together, a quiet that feels more familiar than the few months you've known him. Whether it's your little study sessions at the library, or when you hang out with him after hours in his painting class, it's familiar being around him. The thought settles around you like a well-worn blanket, a comfort you didn't know you craved until you found it here.
You glance over back at Minghao, who seems to be focused back on his sketchbook. He taps his pencil against his bottom lip in concentration. There's a small smudge of charcoal on his nose that you pinpoint, just hardly noticeable, but it makes you want to reach out and brush it away with your thumb.
The bold thought makes your stomach churn.
"Lay down with me, Hao."
The words leave you before you can stop them, surprising even yourself. A blush creeps up your neck, warming your cheeks as you continue watching Minghao. He's still focused on his sketchbook, but the tapping of his pencil against his lip has ceased. He looks down at you, eyes widening slightly in surprise before softening into a gentle smile.
"Lay down?" he asks, a teasing lilt in his voice.
"Y-Yeah," You stammer, suddenly wishing you'd phrased it differently. "I mean, if you want. The sky looks better from here, you know?"
Minghao just tilts his head to the side as if in contemplation, before closing his sketchbook and shifting his position. He tosses his backpack right next to yours, laying himself down on the grass and stretching his body in relief. The grass crinkles softly beneath him, his arm briefly brushing against yours, and you can feel the warmth radiating from his body as he settles in, peering up at the sky with you.
He's painted the sky many times, but for some reason, it feels different looking at it right now, and he isn't entirely sure why.
"What's the weirdest colour you've painted with?"
The sudden question makes Minghao sit up slightly, leaning on his elbow to face you better. The corners of his lips are pulled up in the hint of a smirk.
"Goose turd green."
His eyes detail the way your face contorts in slight disgust, before nothing but laughter tumbles out of you, and Minghao thinks he'd never get tired of hearing that sound.
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iii. "hi." (vermilion is the colour that seeps through my cheeks when the alcohol beats me and i think about you.)
"Y/N𑁋jeez, how much did they drink tonight?"
"I don't even know𑁋woah, hey! Hold them steady, wait..."
"I'll take them back to their place," Minghao tells the other two boys struggling to keep you from falling over in their hold.
Mingyu and Seokmin stare at him for a second, exchanging a glance with each other before guiding you into Minghao's hold carefully. Minghao secures an arm around your waist, loosely at first, before tightening instantly because you're just about to fall out of his grip. He bids the other guys goodbye, then sets off with you towards your dorm.
"Are you alright?" he asks, even though he knows the answer already. "I told you before that you should know your limits."
You giggle, a wobbly, off-key sound. "Oh, I feel peachy, thank you so much."
Minghao just sighs, shaking his head slightly as he adjusts his hold on you, making sure you're steady on your feet.
The walk back to your dorm is painfully slow. Streetlights cast an orange glow on the sidewalk, painting long shadows that seem to dance alongside you. You lean heavily against Minghao, head hanging down to the ground, your footsteps unsteady. The world seems to tilt and sway with every giggle that escapes you.
Your vision is a bit blurry when your dorm comes into sight. Relief washes over you, and you lean even heavier into Minghao, practically melting into him by the time you reach your door and it swings open.
He steps you inside, moving you past the shoe rack by the entrance and towards your bed, and you flop down on the plush mattress with a low groan, nearly dragging down Minghao on top of you.
He catches himself just in time, a hand landing on the mattress beside you with a soft thud, and suddenly he's hovering above you, his breath catching with the sudden closeness of his body pressed up against yours. However, it just makes a laugh bubble out of your throat from deep within your chest, and with half-lidded eyes, you find yourself staring dazedly up at him.
"Wow, hiiii, you're like..." You drawl your words and tap aimlessly at his shoulder. "You're like... so pretty, you know? Have I told you that before?"
Heat creeps up Minghao's neck. He blinks down at you, eyes trailing over your face and cheeks which were stained a soft shade of vermilion from all the alcohol earlier. A small, surprised airy laugh escapes his lips.
He opens his mouth to respond, but nothing comes out. And even after pulling away from you, you continue, voice thick with inebriation.
"And your smile? Oh, don't even get me started," You slur, a goofy grin plastered on your face. "Those big, cute eyes you have? They, like, make the whole world look... sparkly."
"Y/N, you need𑁋"
"And whenev... whenever you paint," You continue, voice trailing off away. The world seems to be spinning a little slower now, the grin to your face faltering for a moment, replaced by a furrowed brow as you try to focus on the thought. "Yeah, whenever you paint... you get this... this really focused look on your face. Like the world fades away and all that's left is the canvas. It's kind of... hot."
Minghao could simply only stare at you. He knows he should probably get you settled into bed and leave, but his feet seem rooted to the floor below. His gaze flickers up and down your face, then back up to your eyes, searching for any sign of what you just said being a joke. But all he sees is a genuine, albeit slightly hazy and inebriated, fondness.
"You think so?" he finally manages to ask.
"Yeah," You mumble knowingly as if instinctive, eyelids drooping closed a little further. "Makes you look, uh... determined. Like you could𑁋like you could paint the stars out of the sky or something."
Minghao cowers his head down for a second, before looking back up at you, crossing his arms together bemusedly. "Do you want me to paint the stars for you?"
You give a dreamy nod. In your cloudy mind, the idea sounds incredibly romantic, like something out of a dream.
"I think..." You start once again. "that would really make me like you even more."
Minghao feels his lips twitch, somewhat hopeful yet also reluctant, before letting out another sigh.
"You need to go to bed." He walks back over and helps pull the covers over you. "I'll leave you some water and meds to take in the morning, okay?"
A pang of disappointment shoots through you as he pulls away, a sleepy pout crossing over your features. You watch him with heavy eyelids, the room tilting ever so slightly with each passing beat of your heart.
"Wait," You murmur, grabbing weakly at his sleeve.
Minghao turns back around. You're looking at him, eyes a little more focused now, a hint of a playful smile on your lips, and shooting him a look that means business.
"Don't forget the stars, okay, mister?"
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iv. "hi." (pewter is the colour of the clouds when the earth can't hold it in much longer, and the words burst all at once.)
It hits you on a random Wednesday near the end of the month during an exam on English Romanticism that you simply can't stand this anymore.
You're avoiding Minghao, purposely attending more study sessions that your classmates offer and taking up more shifts at the small café across from campus that you applied for a while ago to make some extra bucks. You know you're avoiding him, and he probably knows it too, and it's all your fault𑁋you're letting him get away and slip through the cracks between your fingers.
Minghao's art had been selected for a prestigious exhibition out of town, and he was set to leave at the end of the month for this internship just as summer is starting, and the thought of him being gone brings a hollow ache to your chest. It's becoming unbearable each passing day, each millisecond that passes knowing you've been so stupidly immature to push him away when he's quite literally been the best thing that has happened to you.
You may never understand how Xu Minghao𑁋this sophisticated, well-mannered, and endlessly talented artist𑁋had managed to wriggle his way into your heart so effortlessly, but there he was, occupying every crevice and corner with his gentle smiles and soft laughter that seem to flip the world over. He was just this sentient, living breathing form of peace that you can’t seem to let go of.
When another boom of thunder shatters outside, you think, screw this.
Screw avoiding him. This wasn't how this story was supposed to end.
You're quick to shove your belongings back in your bag the moment your class ends. The rain has calmed down a little when you step outside, which only seems to fuel the determination within you.
With a deep breath, you pull your jacket tighter against your body, and start to spring across campus. The rain might be getting heavier with each passing minute, but you don't care. All you care about is getting to Minghao before the storm within you bursts too.
Reaching his dorm building, you're merely a shivering mess, hair damp and plastered to your forehead and clothes clinging uncomfortably to your skin. You barely have the breath to push open the heavy doors, collapsing against them for a moment to catch your breath.
But just as you're about to push open the door, a figure blocks your way, and you peer up to see Minghao standing in front of you. There's an umbrella clutched in his hand, and a puzzled look etches across his features when he takes sight of your disheveled appearance in front of him. You could only gaze at him.
"Hi," You say breathlessly, as if you've been holding on to the singular word for dear life.
Minghao just blinks a few times, unsure if he's looking at you as if you were crazy or if he's just imagining you.
"Hi," he finally responds, voice all gentle and slightly hesitant.
You glance down at the umbrella in his hand. "Are you going somewhere?"
Minghao opens his mouth to respond, also looking down at the umbrella in his hands as if magically appeared there out of thin air, then a bashful look crosses his face.
"I forgot some supplies back in class, so I thought I'd grab them before the storm gets any worse," he explains somewhat lamely, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. "But I𑁋Are you... are you okay?"
You give a loose nod, then shake your head dismissively right afterwards. Gosh, you're losing it.
Minghao clears his throat. "What are you doing out here in the rain? You're going to get sick𑁋"
"You know I-I like you, right?" The words stumble clumsily over your tongue, shattering whatever fragile tension was building up between you two. "And you probably knew that already, to be honest, because you always seem to know me better than I know myself. But the thought of you leaving just... scared me, and I panicked and pushed you away."
A lump forms in your throat. Minghao's expression is practically unreadable in front of you. There's a mix of surprise, a hint of something that could be hurt, and something else you can't exactly decipher.
You let out a dry chuckle, embarrassment crawling up your face but you try to ignore it as much as you can.
"I-I know I sound crazy right now," You say, forcing a smile that seems more like a grimace. "But I... I couldn't let you leave without knowing how I feel. So yeah. I like you. A lot. Maybe more than that. I don't know. It sort of scares me, honestly."
You wait a few moments, simply standing there in the falling rain while anticipating just anything from the boy standing in front of you as if the world had come to a pause. His silence stretches suffocatingly long, nothing but a cloud swirling in those beautiful eyes of his.
Then he looks down at the umbrella in his hand for a moment, then back at you, his gaze lingering on your soaked clothes and shivering form. And just before you can spiral into a wave of panic, Minghao steps forward close to you. Without a word, he unfurls the umbrella and holds it over your head, tilting it slightly to ensure you're fully covered from the rain.
"Let's get you out of this rain," he says finally, low and calm. "You're freezing."
"I..." You start, then stop, giving a muted nod. "Okay."
Minghao leads you back inside his dorm building and up to his room, the warmth seeping overwhelmingly into your bones. He ushers you into his space, the door swinging shut with a soft click behind you.
You've been inside Minghao's room before, but it feels different now, more intimate somehow. The air hangs heavy as you awkwardly perch yourself on the edge of his bed, careful not to let the water dripping off you land on his sheets, and you watch as he quietly makes his way to his closet and disappears behind the hanging clothes. A moment later, he emerges with a soft, oversized hoodie and a towel in hand.
"Here." He holds out the towel and hoodie towards you. "Dry yourself off and change out of those clothes."
The softness of the towel against your skin is the equivalent to luxury as you meticulously pat down your hair and face. You shoot glances at Minghao across the room, seeing him busy himself at his desk, back turned to you, a low hum escaping his lips.
You slip on the oversized hoodie, the familiar scent of Minghao washing over you and instantly relaxing your jittery nerves. The sleeves hang past your fingertips, the material engulfing you in a comforting warmth.
"Feeling a little better?" Minghao asks, turning around to face you after a few minutes. You hardly notice the way his gaze sweeps over your form, lingering on the way the hoodie basically swallows you.
A shy, self-conscious look crosses your features. "Yeah, um... Thanks."
Minghao returns the smile, though there's a hint of something else in his eyes𑁋perhaps relief or maybe even a touch of fondness. "Always."
That particular silence passes again as you both sit in his room, the only sound the soft patter of rain against the window. You fidget nervously with the sleeves of his hoodie.
Then, you let out a sigh. "Look, Hao𑁋"
"Do you want anything to drink?"
The offer zips your mouth back up, leaving your unfinished words hanging in the air. Is he... trying to brush away everything that has just happened in the last fifteen minutes? All just like that? You nearly want to scoff at the thought, but you bite at your bottom lip instead, a pang of disappointment settling in your chest.
"Honestly?" You lay your hands flat on your lap. "I'd kill for a hot chocolate right now."
Minghao just chuckles softly. "Okay," Then another long, considerable pause. "Are you working at the café later on?"
The thought of working right now makes you cringe internally. "No, thank goodness. My shift actually got swapped with someone else. Lucky break, I guess."
The corners of Minghao's mouth lift up subtly. He glances back out the window, seeing that the rain had become much lighter and cleared up significantly, revealing the sky in a palette of muted greys. His gaze returns to you, a thoughtful expression painting his features.
"Let's go then," he asserts firmly, rising up to his feet.
You raise an eyebrow at him. "What? Right now? To the café?"
"Mhm."
"But you can't𑁋we can't just𑁋"
"It's a date," Minghao affirms, cutting your words off promptly. "My treat."
His words catch you off-guard, and for a moment, you're at a loss for words. Your mouth hangs down to the ground, warmth crawling up the cheeks just like the hot chocolate you desperately crave right now. You can feel your heart pounding furiously out of your chest and whatever tension coiling in your stomach dissipating away.
"A... date?" You squeak out, voice coming out small and weak.
Minghao's lips purse together in a thin line. "Unless you have other plans𑁋"
"Oh no, no, no," You blurt out, finding yourself already breathless for no reason at all, struggling to keep the giddy grin forming on your face at bay. "A date sounds perfect, actually."
Relief floods over Minghao's features. He lets out a little giggle, the kind that always makes your insides do a little happy flip.
"Good," he responds simply. "I'm glad."
"Do I get to pay next time?" You ask teasingly as you stand up. "If there is a next time, at least."
Nothing but amusement dances in his eyes.
"We'll see about that."
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v. "hi." (calamine is the colour staining your cheeks and your lips against my ear.)
Minghao's lips are on yours before you have the opportunity to breathe in the air of relief of the hotel room.
It's not hard for your body to melt into him instinctively, the kiss soft yet desperate, tender yet urgent. You find your fingers kneading at the silky material of the suit that he wore, and his hand coming to rest on your lower back. Both of your feet move in mere unison together before you feel the edge of the bed nudge the back of your knee.
When the two of you pull back for a minute to breathe, all you can do is faintly chuckle.
"You act like you haven't seen me in years," You tease, letting a hand come to toy with his tie. "Did you miss me that much?"
Minghao's gaze only flickers between your eyes, your lips, and down the outfit that seems to hug your body just perfectly, before settling back up to your face. His own face is close enough to yours that you swear you could pinpoint the flecks of stardust in his irises. He's simply staring at you with nothing but adoration, his gaze so intense like he's trying to memorise every little detail etched on your face, even if he's already done so many times. He's painted stars on your skin with his fingertips, lips, whispered words, and his heart.
And then he's kissing you again, more softly and slower this time, the weight of his body following your own as you fall back down on the bed behind.
Missing you is more than just an understatement. Being separated from you felt like this physical piece of him was missing from his chest. His art had been reaching the rightful hands of museums abroad just as he deserves, and you had gotten used to him travelling for days on end to attend exhibitions and workshops.
You jumped on the first opportunity to be able to visit him. And now, with you in his arms and your lips pressed against his, Minghao feels like he's finally whole again.
His mouth pulls away from the sweet spot to your neck, trailing a soft path back up to your lips, giving you a small kiss before pulling back to look at you. You hear the way his breath hitches in his throat, the feeling of his hand coming to interlock with yours at your side, the metal of the ring on his finger meeting your skin.
You peer up at him longingly, lovingly, a tiny smile playing at the corners of your lips.
"Hi," You whisper, a breathless laugh escaping you.
Minghao's gaze softens even further, his thumb tracing gentle circles on the back of your hand as he leans back down.
"Hi, dearest," he murmurs back affectionately, adjusting himself so that his mouth is near your ear, barely grazing against the shell as he whispers, "You're beautiful."
You could only giggle as he retreats himself away slightly, but you tug him by the tie again to bring him back down. "Yeah? What else?"
There's a thoughtful look that crosses over his features, his cheeks painted an ethereal shade of calamine pink, mirroring the flush of warmth that spreads across your own face. You've always grown accustomed to Minghao's fairly quiet nature, however it doesn't take much to read over even the most imperceptible shifts in his expressions. Whenever words seem to be too shy or hesitant to come out, the stars in his eyes speak for him.
Minghao just lowers himself even more, the ghost of his lips hardly brushing back against yours.
"I love you."
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