#i think i made a textpost about this before but now you get the image version

[tokyo-tower-symbolism]

Hikaren in the endings of the movie revues

#revue starlight #hikari kagura #karen aijou #i think i made a textpost about this before but now you get the image version #which isn't as neat as what I had in mind but is more textually relevant ig

[nat-20s]

We Don’t Need No Mournful Sounds

fuck it! *writes a fic based on my own textpost about Oliver briefly joining up with JMART post death* i don’t even generally think they died i just was plagued by Thoughts and Images

Read on Ao3

~*~

Jon wakes up.

This is unexpected. It had been hoped for, dreamed of, in his final breaths, but unexpected nonetheless.

What’s less unexpected is Martin’s hand in his own. Jon had known, with an aching deep certainty, that if he were to end up anywhere at all, Martin would be there with him.

Martin gives his hand a squeeze, breaking the stillness of the moment enough for Jon to let out a stuttering breath and finally look at the man he loves.

All of Martin’s edges are singed, previously white hair blackened with soot. His eyes are bloodshot, face is red, and hands are stained with blood. He looks terrible and broken, and he’s the most beautiful thing Jon has ever witnessed. Looking closer,  he finds that there are still tears silently making tracks down his face, and Jon assumes that he’s much the same, but no amount of tears can counteract the small smile blooming on his face. Squeezing Martin’s hand back in the hope that he can express even a fraction of the endless love he’s feeling right now, feeling forever, he manages to whisper out a. “Hi.”

The haunted expression of Martin’s face breaks with a laugh, or a sob, or perhaps some combination of the two. In less than a blink, Martin wraps his arms around Jon, pulling him as close as two people who remain separate entities can be. Face buried in his neck, Martin lets muddled words spill out of him, a messy inanity of I’m sorrys and I love yous and Never agains, making for a symphony of anger and agony and care. Jon rubs circles on his back, matching Martin’s frantic words with calm, gentle ones, mostly consisting “We’re okay.” Because it’s true, isn’t it? Wherever they are, whatever happens next, there’s still a something, and they’re in that something together.

Some unknown amount of time later, maybe minutes, maybe centuries, they reach some sort of stability. Martin pulls back, though he doesn’t let go of Jon’s wrists, and Jon is infinitely grateful for the continued contact. As he’s a little more able to process external stimuli, Martin blinks at their surroundings. Not much to see, if he’s being honest. It’s similar to the nondescript blankness of the tunnels, though they can make out any texture of stone, and their environment shifts and swirls in a familiar way, though where the familiarity comes from, he couldn’t say. Voicing Jon’s thoughts out loud, Martin asks, “Any idea where we actually are?”

“I, uh, don’t know.”

“Don’t know or don’t, y’know, Know?”

“Either. Both. I…,” Jon reaches out, just to confirm something he’s known since he opened his eyes, “the Eye is gone. Or at least, any tether I had to it is. There’s..there’s just me left. More intact than I would’ve expected, honestly.”

One of Martin’s hands slides from Jon’s wrist to his hand, lifting it so he can kiss the knuckles. “That’s..that’s good, yeah?”

Jon presses their foreheads together, deciding even the foot of distance between them is far too much. “It’s wonderful.”

The moment to bask in the joy of that freedom is quickly interrupted by the sound of approaching footsteps. Fear grabs a hold of both of them, their tensions indistinguishable from one another, but as Jon squints into the distance and the figure becomes clear, he lets himself relax.

“Hello, Oliver.”

Oliver catches to them near instantly, despite his seemingly leisurely pace.  He gives them both a pleasant enough smile, despite the fact that Martin has turned his head just enough to glare daggers at the man. “Jon. Martin. I would say it’s nice to see you two, but I find that’s rarely true in my line of work.”

Voice dripping in venom Martin grits out, “What do you want?”

Before Oliver can answers, Jon gives a gentle but chiding, “Martin.”

“What, Jon? Excuse me if I not exactly thrilled by his presence.”

Dropping his head onto Martin’s shoulder, Jon tells him, “Martin. We didn’t make it.”

“Wh-,” Martin’s glances back and forth between Oliver and Jon, before finally settling on, “Oh.”

After this revelation, Oliver adds, “For what it’s worth, I am sorry. I was hoping that by being unable to see your fates that you would outlast me.”

While Martin mutters a “That’s not worth much of anything” under his breath, Jon more audibly replies, “Thank you. We appreciate it. I..suppose you’re to escort us to whatever’s next, then?”

“Not exactly. More like I thought it might be nice to have company before our paths finally diverge. I am here for my end, not yours.”

“So, after the world was restored, you were-?”

Oliver holds up a hand to stop him. “No, no, not exactly. Benefit of belonging to the End, anyone that might have a desire to revenge themselves upon you is already gone. Well, except for Martin here, though I hope we can manage some level of civility.”

Oliver levels what some might consider a smirk at Martin, to which Martin gives a sneer before conceding, “Whatever,” before giving Jon a slight tug for them to get a move on. Jon, however, could never resist satiating his curiosity, and this seems relatively harmless to pursue, so he doesn’t let himself move with the tide that is a determined Martin. “So, wait, what happened to you then? If it wasn’t an automatic effect of the fears leaving or- or someone coming after you?”

“When the fears were taken elsewhere, I was given a choice much like your own. I could follow their lead, I could try the world without them, or I could walk along my own root. There’s every possibility that I would’ve survived the new world, but I was ready for my own walk through the final doorway.”

Jon studies him, trying to use intuition rather than raw power once again, but can detect no hint of sadness on the man’s features. Jon wishes he had that same level of peace, but while he can’t quite obtain, that primal fear of death still lingering, he thinks that having Martin with him even through the end, that he can at least understand it.

The three of them set off, simply picking the direction that most feels right on an instinctual level. They walk with the silence of people that are headed towards something both inevitable and inscrutable, before finally some of the curling void pulls away to reveal a door.

It is a deeply ordinary door. It is made of a whitewashed wood, and somewhat resembles the door to the safe house. In an actual location, it would be unsuspicious, even to the paranoid. Here, it makes fear course through him. Trying to keep the tremble out of his voice, Jon asks, “Is this for us?”

Oliver replies, “For you two, yes. I have a different destination.”

Martin chimes up, sounding much more resolute out of the two of them. “Well? You’re the ruler of the dead or whatever, got any idea what’s on the other side?”

Oliver makes a considering hum, then tells them, “I can’t be certain, that was never an insight I was granted. However, I know that your souls are so inextricably bound that whatever is there, is there for both of you. If I were to make an educated guess, I would say that my end will grant me rest, and for you two, time.”

As soon as he says this, they can hear noises from the other side of the door. Laughter and conversation with words that can’t quite be made out, but the voices behind the words, he recognizes. Tim and Sasha, the real Sasha, the one he can finally, finally remember. Martin gasps, and Jon knows he remembers too.

Oliver gives a wave and a very final, “Good luck.”

Jon replies with a genuine, “You too,” while Martin replies with a surprisingly cordial, “Uh huh.”

They watch until Oliver fades into the blankness. As soon as he is swallowed up, Jon pulls Martin’s hand to his scarred over heart and asks, “Ready?”

Martin huffs out a watery laugh and says, “Not even slightly.”

Together, they open the door.  

#tma spoilers #tma 200 #jon sims #oliver banks #martin blackwood #tma

[imagesbyele]

the theme I don’t know how to describe because it has too many things featured in it and it will take a year or 

aro-ace theme!

note that you are allowed to use the theme for whatever you want, change all colors, images (you want to make it a marvel thing? go for it! It’s personal and you want to use other flag colors? go pick those rainbow colors!), but my inspiration was, well, not having seen aro-ace themes before and wanting to make one. I didn’t upload background images but you have the option. Feel free to edit as you please, just don’t remove the credit or claim it’s yours!

as always in the source you’ll find the link to the post with static preview, code and instructions/extra credits.

theme is contained, responsive, super customizable. It’s free! But as always consider donating to my ko-fi as this was a lot <3  like or reblog if you use! (or just if you like it, if you want to!)

 this post will have: what you can edit from custom page, the widgets/scripts used with credits and some explanations. Asterisks * next to something will indicate that more about it will be said in the linked post. I’d apologize for the length but it’s due to how many things I added to the theme and that you should know about. 

now, what can you edit from your customization page:

-nearly every font and its color and size, so that if a font is by default bigger than others you can easily reduce the size. There is a select menu for the body font with all the fonts present in this blog, so you know what they are and can type the one you want for other eleents. I think I only left a couple to be edited from the editor, like your quotes posts if you reblog them a lot. This includes h2 as it’s what you use as ‘big font’ in your posts and h3 in case you want to personalize it and use it for something on purpose, as it has to be added to the html of the post.

-one of the new things:I used a gradient for the backgrounds of the big container, the sidebar and the posts container, but also of tumblr’s default music player (latter done initially following @octomoosey​‘s tutorial then messed with by me hence no album art).  See static preview posts. You can type the colors straight from the costomization page like this:

if you want one solid color you can just write, for example: black, black as it needs at least two. To bottom/To left/to top/to right change the direction. The only thing you need to edit from the html is if you want to go from linear-gradient (like you see in the sidebar) to radial-gradient (like in the big container which has green in the center and purple on the outside) and vice versa, if you want. 

-you can also upload background images of the sidebar, container and bigcontainer and select the optional blending with the colors, which can be none and you only see the images or something like screen or hard-color and check the results (bigcontainer as an overlay gif on Screen now)  -more typing: you can paste the symbol or the symbol code for the list items and the decorations around the post title, right now both being spades. *

-you can upload up to five background images if you enable the ‘changing background’ function otherwise only the first one counts. They will change when you refresh the page, thanks to @lmthemes​

-you can turn on and off the music box (player3 by @glenthemes​​ ), and if it’s enabled you can add two songs from the customization page (or go to the html editor and up it to four before it can get messy as it shows on hover), typing url, author, url of the album art, and song title. You already have We Are Golden by Mika as an example (takes a second to start due to the recording, watch out not to get scared if there is silence and then the first note)*

-optional searchbar in the sidebar with optional suggestions when you click on it (if you want them though you’ll need to go to the editor to type links and names, but you can turn it off and just keep the searchbar, like I said) also by glenthemes’ tutorials. 

-the separator between text posts image is also optional and if turned on, you can also turn on and off whether the image is the avatair/portrait of the person who made the post, with a link to the original if it’s a reblog, or if you want the image to be one you upload yourself, 50x50px and it should resize to fit in (also with a link, in this case to the post itself so you can open it from the top of the page). One is the toggle button ifshowtinyimage, and the other is ‘tinyimageisthesource’, if you turn that off you upload the image yourself. If you add a source to your posts, it will appear among the permalinks regardless.

more under read more!

-besides all normal colors and borders you can pick the color of the border/glow/shadow (call it as you want) of three different categories, or turn it off: the mainglow for big elements like containers and sidebar and sidebar images, the audios glow for players like spotify, regular one or soundcloud. Finally the images shadow when inside your posts. The latter is set on inherit because it means that if an image is also a link like your tiny-image it will be of the same color of your links and change on hover. That is something you can only change on the editor by searching for color:inherit and change it to what you want, if you don’t want to turn it off. 

-askbox colors have been changed with @eggdesign​‘s tricks! look for ask_form in the editor and try changing the number of filter there to see more effects. Also the askbox never shrink, a fix by @whateverhtml​ -pinned post has a little banner, styled like permalinks. 

-you can pick a color for top-info which are the date and notes. I left it empty because it automatically gets the default links color but you can pick it yourself. 

-turn on and off unnested captions looks for textposts and for all other posts (as people who use xkit to edit previous posts will get blockquotes anyway and may not like the final result) thanks to @annasthms​ code. -blockquotes are of alternating colors, by @bychloethemes​. You can obviously choose the same color if you want them to just have the one. You can also select the type of blockquote, if a solid line or dots or dashes.  -you can choose if your smaller sidebar image, sidebarimg2, is an image you’ll upload or if it’s your avatar/portrait by toggling it on and off. If you don’t want sidebar images and you don’t upload any, there are instructions on top of the html to delete the border so you only see the sidebar bg. (basically just delete their box-shadow) -speaking of which, your title will wrap around the second image like in the preview. If that doesn’t work for you you can try changing sizes and font or by going to the editor and changing the margin-top so it’s out of the sidebar image’s reach and can be a “straight line” again (in case it doesn’t fit and the long title is cut in the wrong place)

-you can turn on and off a copy link of the post button on the far left of your permalinks bar, so people can copy the permalink from dash - also by glenthemes.

-navigation links have two alternating colors, odd links right now are black, even links are white, and their hovers are the opposite of that. You can make them all of the same color, in which case you’ll need to look for .navilink a:hover and change the hover color for both. If you have custom pages and enable the link to show it will be automatically added. To change the cat icons just search for ‘cat’ and replace as pleased. To change the ask icon because maybe you don’t have them enabled look for ‘envelope’ with your ctrl + f. You can type urls and titles of navi links from the custom page, the first two are automatically home and ask, there are three more under the description. All icons from font-awesome have a black border so the white ones don’t disappear on light backgrounds, you can change that looking for .fas 

-you can select post-sizes: 400, 450, 500, 540. Whether the sidebar is next to the container or on top will depend on your post size and the screen width as at some point they may not fit. They always do fit on desktop though, and on screens that are smaller than 800px the sidebar is assumed to be on top and will have a max height of 300px (but you can scroll down). I couldn’t make the bigcontainer get bigger for giant screens as I can’t calculate the right size in which all post-sizes + sidebar will look good.

-lightboxes show images with a glow too. Speaking of which you get lightboxes as always, pxu photoset fix and video resizing fix all by @shythemes​ and with the bychloethemes fix. npf photosets fix by glenthemes. No href.li addition from tumblr when you add a link to a post by @magnusthemes​.

-soundcloud player is minimal and its play button is the same color of your permalinks icons thanks to shythemes tutorial. spotify is also minimal, instructions to change it are there. 

-tumblr controls are small and semi-transparent until you hover, also dark regardless, followed painthemes tutorial.

-chats are styled like imessages by ncrthlanes now deactivated, submit posts have at least the submitter’s url recognizable, reblogged asks also get a background for the answer as well as borders, link posts are styled as much as a link-post can be styled. 

-there are already links and similar things written to be an example in your customization page but in any case you get instructions in the editor and everything is divided in sections as much as possible. Also I’m here for any questions. 

#asexuality #aromance #aroace #lgbt #aro-ace #themes #free themes #free resources #evansyhelp #dailyresources #rp themes #rph theme #rpc #main theme #lgbtqia #dustyresources #onlyresources #completeresources #my themes #tumblr theme #rp theme #theme 08 #mine

[dam-mango-cheese]

ok hi I just wanted to come on here to say that this fandom really needs to get our shit together. it's not just about the toxicity and stuff, it's the rude and toxic things we've normalized to the point that we don't even notice when someone does it. so here goes a list of stuff we need to stop doing also I'm pissed rn sorry if I come off as rude. this is also not directed at anyone in particular so please don't take offense.

uh giving credit????? "giving credit who??" you may ask. well. let's start with artists. if you repost someone's art, pLEASE for the love of god give credit. it's not that hard. if you find art on google, pinterest, etc. and don't know who to credit, then don't post it??? it really is that easy. or you could do a reverse image search, if you don't know how to do that on your device, google it. if you don't know what google is?? go back to that rock you were living under before thanks.

moving onto the second part of the giving credit point. CHECK THEIR PROFILE BEFORE POSTING. many artists don't allow reposts. or sometimes they want you to ask for permission first. some artists also allow "normal" reposts but not for example in video edits. so please do check their bio and/or any highlights titled "important!" or something similar.

next we have the way of crediting. please do tag the artist in the actual post. so many people tend to just mention them in the caption. some even do it with the @/username instead of directly tagging them. I know for a fact most people prefer to be tagged in the actual post so please do. it's literally not that hard I don't see the problem?????

now pls remember to credit people who make textposts or memes too. an artist might spend more time on an artwork then your average meme maker spends on a post, but it's still important to credit them. even if we don't spend AS much time on our posts, doesn't mean we don't spend time on them. we take time out of our personal life to make posts for your enjoyment and if you think my post is good enough to repost you should certainly have the decency to at least give me credit tyvm.

now if you found the post on tumblr, twitter, etc. and don't know who to credit??? don't post it. or at least search their @ on instagram to see if they have the same/similar instagram username. you can also dm them on tumblr/twt/whatever and ask them if it's ok that you repost their stuff on instagram and if they have an instagram @ they would want you to use. if you don't do any of these at least write their username from another platform in the caption and mention to those who see the post on which platforms they can find whoever made the posts. that was a little messy but i hope it made sense.

i also wanna point out that the tagging point stands for memes, textposts, etc. too. it's really annoying when people can't bother to tag someone in the actual post. it's literally easier than tagging them in the caption what's the fkn problem?????

kinda like the last point but please tag both artists and other credits. like I'll see people who tag the artist on the first slide and then only tag textpist credits in the caption or just not credit memes and stuff at all???? like why?? if you know how to give credit to artists why is it so hard to do the same for other content?

finally moving on to something else. let's address the opinion stuff. this one's gna be short because my brain is empty rn. just let people have their own opinions. there's no need for you to go and state yours under someone else's post. usually all it does is to stir up drama, and believe me, no one wants that. this is especially to the people who can't state their opinion respectfully. if your opinion involves dragging someone else down or making them feel bad for what they think?? don't say it. don't. it doesn't make anyone feel better about anything and it's just rude and disrespectful. stop. thank you.

to the hardcore, toxic percabeth shippers: no <3. it's not cool of you to be 🤪the most hardcore percabeth shipper ever™️🤪. it's not a competition. it's just annoying. someone makes a perachel post??? big deal, none of your business. why does it matter that they ship perachel and you don't?? it's literally not a big deal let them have their opinion pls. someone says they ship pipabeth???? "NO PERCABETH IS THE ELITE SHIP FOREVER!!!!!!!!!!" 🤌throw your device across the room to release your anger🤌

now I've had this in my drafts for a while and one time I accidentally posted it, someone saw it before I had time to delete it and dm'd me to ask if all of this also applies when you reblog/retweet. obviously if you screenshotted someone's post or art all of the points above still stand. but if you just reblog or retweet, the original posters username will automatically showed and accessible so it's totally fine!

#yes i realize this is 90% about giving credit bc i literally could not come up with anything else #pjo #pjo fandom #percy jackson fandom #riordanverse #rick riordan #percy jackson #pjato

[inkofamethyst]

June 16, 2021

I think I’ve overestimated the importance of my opinion as a “blog” with eighty followers, none of whom are part of the DSMP fandom (that I can recall, especially since most of them are bots lol).  But it wouldn’t be my journal if I didn’t develop some sort of undue nervousness over something, would it?

Anyway I’m in the process of going through the entire discography of The Crane Wives by album in chronological release order.  I’m having an amazing time and I’ve ended up adding like 80% of the songs I’ve heard so far to my Current playlist.  I think there’s another three or four albums to go :)

Also I’ve been so active this month?????  Last year I posted a total of four times over the course of June but this year I’ve almost posted every single day this month??  What’s up with that?  OH LOL probably because I spent most of June in a weird catatonic state where I was flipping between CNN, FOX, and Instagram with all the protesting going on.  AND I ONLY POSTED ONCE IN JULY??? WACKK.  I didn’t post in August last year until August 20, 2020.  I say in that post “Life has been moving so slowly recently that there just hasn’t been much to record” which is interesting.  The thing is, I definitely did go on tumblr.  I only put images into my queue, so all of the reblogged textposts were posted manually.  It really must’ve just been a dead-brained summer.

Oh also,,,,,, saw a tiktok yesterday by a black girl which was like “being called cute is such a backhanded compliment because when people call me cute it’s like they’re also calling me weak and helpless” and that flies directly in the face of my own Cute Campaign and made me feel some kinda way.  Seeing all the comments agreeing with her made me feel some kinda way.  Imma take a deep dive into that real quick (no, not as deep a dive as yesterday,,,, leave me alone).

Alright.  I don’t really know how to start this?  Um,, No one’s ever said out of the blue that I’m attractive.  Like, my friends have, probably, sure.  But the only time I can think of someone thinking I was attractive was two drunk girls at a college party who said I looked pretty.  Yeah.  Don’t get me wrong, I do think I’m pretty most days, and that’s been enough for me in general, but I want y’all to know the background I’m coming from here.

For half a year, I’m sure you recall, I did this thing called the Cute Campaign.  It was meant to be a year-long commitment to putting more thought into the clothes I wore each day, and I made a commitment to talking a little bit about how cute I felt in my clothes that day.  This came after the realization that I’d been trying to achieve “Hot” as a descriptor but my imitation of ~sexy~ was admittedly poor because it’s not me at all.  See December 30, 2019 for a more thorough explanation, but that’s the gist.

The Cute Campaign was a great thing for me.  I personally think it... well, if you want a full look at my thoughts on it, take a look at April 9, 2020, but beware: it’s a bit of an anxiety rollercoaster, that post.  Anyway it helped with my self-image, I think, especially since I’ve had issues with ~gender~ (I’m a cis woman, but I get just enough little hairs on my jawline and neck to make me self conscious, my sideburns are kinda thicc, and I’ve been told more than once that I look boyish when I let my hair just hang in twists.  I am extremely protective of my femininity (so much so that I had a mini freak out over accidentally buying a men’s shirt a bit ago (it’s somewhere in this journal, but that shirt has since become one of my favorites))).  Making a point of calling myself cute every day was a huge thing for me, and it’s something I might return to in the future (I suppose it was sort of like a daily affirmation before I knew what those were, so I’d start my post out positively with the Cute Campaign and end positively with something I was thankful for).

Now, I suppose the main difference between the Cute Campaign and what that girl was talking about on tiktok is that I was calling myself cute with specific intent and I didn’t need to explain that intent because it was a conversation involving one person.  I note in my December 30, 2019 post that by calling myself cute I’m not taking away from the fact that I am also intelligent and calculating.  I just wanted a descriptor that made me feel comfortable, and it turned into an affirmation of sorts of my own attractiveness which frankly I needed.

So, I suppose, that begs the question of whether I would feel comfortable with a man calling me cute.  I think it depends on the context/tone.  I feel like I would be able to tell when someone is calling me cute in a condescending way as opposed to an adoring way.  I don’t like being condescended to lol.  I can imagine that I would be able to pick out that tone because it’s icky.  

But as I was scrolling through the comments (I must’ve spent a good three or four minutes down there because I was shocked that anyone would take “cute” to be anything but a compliment, but the majority of the comments were in agreement (I didn’t think it appropriate to express the fact that no one of note had used any term to call me attractive (though I did find one brave soul who said that lol))), I saw that different women had different ways that they would prefer to be called attractive.  For some it was “hot,” for others, “sexy,” for others still, “fine.”  Honestly?  Those words intimidate me lol.  But it was interesting to see nonetheless!  

I don’t know.  I wish I had some sort of a conclusion for this.  Maybe this line of thought ultimately amounts to nothing.  Another unstructured essay of no consequence for my journal.

I really do wonder why my activity levels are so different between this year and last year at this time.  Like, I must have been having thoughts, right?  Hm.  Maybe they were all just too painful to express.  Or maybe the thoughts were just the same things day in and day out.  Maybe both.

Alright so I’m listening through The Fool in Her Wedding Gown album right, and I know I said that I add like ~80% of the songs I hear to my Current playlist, but like, that’s mostly because I’m listening while reading the lyrics.  I tend to only add songs that I like the lyrics of because then I’m more likely to sing along, right, but honestly I love the sound of The Crane Wives so much that I’d probably add 90%-95% of the songs if I wasn’t reading the lyrics omg.  Like I’d just jam to literally all these songs even if I can’t pick out a meaning or story from the lyrics I just like the way they sounddddddd.  Folksy.  Dark cottagecore.  Femme Western.  Lady cowboy.  Makes me want a waistcoat.  And a horse.  That Western aesthetic, man.

I feel like I should just note that my area has been plagued by cicadas for the past few weeks and they are really just,,,,,, not the move.  They live to scream, have sex, and die.  Their screaming has been the daily backdrop for weeks and I can probably count on one hand the number of times I’ve left the house since they emerged from the ground.  I want them dead and their fat winged corpses washed away by an incessant summer thunderstorm.

OKAY!  The news you have all been waiting for: the ukulele arrived today!  I unboxed it (and it came with a ton of brown paper that I rolled up in the hopes that I would be able to use it for pattern drafting (ahem... Keystone Jacket, anyone??), but I might have to iron the paper flat bc it’s super wrinkly), and it’s really pretty!  Tuning it initially sucked because (I looked this up) apparently the nylon in the strings don’t have a ton of give at first and just need to be broken in before the strings stop going out of tune every five seconds (I’m not exaggerating).  The “case” is basically a bag tbh, but I honestly just needed something to carry it in for now, so I’m not too pressed, but I certainly don’t expect it to be particularly protective.

I watched a bunch of intro videos and I know the A minor, C, F, and G chords.  Lucky for me (an impatient, excitable, and ambitious musician), all of those chords are found in Tongues and Teeth :D Now, those aren’t the only chords found in that songs, but they comprise quite a bit of the song, so I was able to strum on downbeats and chord changes where those specific chords pop up.  Feeling confident that I’ll be able to play it by the end of the summer if not far, far sooner, and then I’ll have tons of time to perfect memorizing it.  I wonder how many songs I can have memorized over my long term memory?  

Hm.  Let me do a test real quick.

Back from my test.  Took out my picc and tried to play a bunch of marching band songs that I haven’t touched in two years, and I still have a pretty good grasp on them!  Granted, I played them for four years straight, but that’s still pretty cool!  My test basically shows that if I put in enough effort to committing the songs to my long term memory, I should be able to hold on to them for quite a bit.

Remember the other day when I was worried about figuring out how chords worked?  Well!  I watched a video on the chromatic scale and how to play it and that’s basically cleared up a ton of how the ukulele works tbh.  Definitely going to try to memorize note placements in addition to chord placements if I can.  Maybe I’ll use the chromatic scale as part of my warmup?

Anyway, my fingertips are sore bro.  Also I had to cut my nails down all the way which is not something I ever do so I guess I’ll be living with stubby nails this summer :/.  I need to pick up a nail file, then.  Maybe stash a few all over the place.  Another body-related thing: boobs.  Mine are in the way.  Like, you’re supposed to hug the ukulele to your chest, but I have bags of fat in the way and all the right one wants to do is rest within the little concave groove in the instrument’s body.  I mean can you blame it though?  I wouldn’t want to be crushed by a slab of wood either tbh.  I’d much prefer to be cradled.  I’m going to have to figure out a solution to that at some point.  Maybe sports bras will help.

Anyway, I don’t think I’ve talked much about the summer when I taught myself the saxophone, but I basically devoted an hour each day to messing around on it.  I had booklets and warm ups and cool downs and daily/weekly goals and all of that.  I was really disciplined because it was something I wanted to do.  I expect that this will be the same :)  This summer I think I’ll spend a minimum of half an hour in practice each day.  I think that’s reasonable considering the fact that I’ve got a job too.  I’m thinking about chronicling my progress weekly on my tiktok.

Um.  That’s basically it.  

Today I’m thankful that my ukulele came in and that it seems to be in working order!

[today-only-happens-once]

the only exception

Title: the only exception

Word Count: 4,549

Summary: College!AU, Musician!AU. Patton shows up to a music festival that Virgil—along with his twin brother, Roman—is headlining, hoping to surprise him. Turns out, it’s Virgil that surprises him first. Romantic Moxiety, brief background Logince. Song-fic.

Warnings: lots of fluff and softness and sappiness, mutual pining elements, declarations of love, description of crowds, cursing, discussion of anxiety, mention of anxiety attacks, kissing, Virgil “writes” a song that’s actually written irl by Paramore but ssshhh Paramore doesn’t exist in this AU, please let me know if I forgot anything.

A/N: Someone on tumblr once made a textpost that said “The Only Exception” was a Moxiety song, and weeks later I listened to it and realized they were right. And then I had this image in my head that wouldn’t go away for like. Months. And then eventually I decided to write this. It’s basically a song-fic. Crazy self-indulgent, heh. Also, I’ve never written Romantic Moxiety before, nor have I written a Patton-POV focused fic. So writing this was a whole boatload of new. I hope it turned out okay! Edited by yours truly, so all mistakes are mine.

You can listen to the song Virgil sings at the end here! 

Tags: @creativenostalgiastuff, @helloisthisusernametaken, @ren-allen, @quoth-the-sparrow, @princelogical, @random-pianist, @ravenclawicecream, @erlenmeyertrash, @milomeepit, @at-least-seven-pretty-potatoes, @rileyfirstname, @pinkeasteregg, @sassy-in-glasses, @vigilantvirgil, @generalfandomfabulousness, @lacrimosathedark, @thepoolofthedead, @monikastec, @heir-of-the-founders, @yourworstnightmare999, @artistictaurean, @kanejandkruge, @cdragontogacotar, @damienswifeolicitydallysgirl, @angst-patton, @savingshae, @noneed4thistbh, @awesomelissawho, @unikornavenger, @bopthesnoz, @spiralofsilencetheory, @finger-gunsss, @crownswriter123, @swlotakulady34, @gaylotusthatexists, @analogical-mess, @dolphidragon, @flix-net, @narniasfinestavengingsociopath, @friedlieb-ferdinand-runge, @bibbidy-bobbity-booyah, @procrastinations-my-middle-name, and also @randomslasher because moxiety! ^u^

…

Present. March. Junior Year.

Patton shoulders his way through the crowd as rock music blares loudly over the speakers. The late March air is cool, and the breeze tugs at the COLLEGE-PALOOZA MUSIC FEST banner hanging from the amphitheater’s stage. A few people he recognizes from his classes wave to him as they nod their head to the music. Patton slows as he finds a small gap in the crowd, not particularly keen on getting into the tightly packed mosh pit that had formed right in front of the stage.

The sun is beginning to set, casting the sky in a light purple hue. Perhaps ironically, it reminds Patton of the guy he’s actually here to see perform. Patton glances at the stage, but there’s no sign of him. He checks his phone for the time. The group was supposed to be on now, but perhaps he’d missed them already.

He looks at the guy beside him—leather jacket and sunglasses, holding a Starbucks cup—and asks over the music, “Which group is this?”

The guy takes a long swallow and then jerks his head towards the stage. “Planets Align. They had trouble getting the sound system working, so they’re running behind.”

Patton nods his understanding, smiles, and thanks him. Planets Align was scheduled to go on right before them, if the pamphlet he’d found on Virgil’s desk was anything to go by. He’d felt terrible at the time when he realized that the band Virgil had formed with his twin brother, Roman, would be headlining a music festival the same day Patton had already promised to help with a group project.

But the other members of his group canceled the meeting earlier today and rescheduled it for next week. So Patton really didn’t see any reason why he couldn’t come support Virgil. And if he maybe didn’t tell Virge in the hopes of being able to surprise him… well.

Besides, he had a feeling Virgil could use a nice surprise. He’d seemed really nervous about the festival when Patton was talking to him about it when he found the pamphlet. Virgil often seemed nervous, but… more nervous than even Virgil’s normal.

Patton smiles a bit to himself when he remembers when they first met.

…

September. Sophomore year.

“For the purposes of this research presentation, I will allow you to choose partners. We will need one group of three, but that certainly seems manageable.”

Patton glances around the stuffy lecture hall. It was only the third time the class had met, so Patton hadn’t had the opportunity to talk to many of his classmates yet. On top of that, it was a pretty big class. Patton had a feeling that he wouldn’t know everybody even by the end of the year. The professor waves her hand to indicate that they should select a partner and begin discussing the project.

Chatter rose up—most people leaning over towards people they were sitting next to, a few calling to friends across the room—and there was shuffling movement and the scraping of chairs as students milled about to find a research partner. Then Patton caught sight of a black and purple hoodie in the back row.

What was his name? Patton couldn’t remember, despite the ice breaker during their first class. He does remember the snort the guy had released when Patton had made a pun about his name when introducing himself. He also remembers the way he’d immediately ducked his head a second later when Patton grinned at him.

Patton gathers his things and squeezes through his classmates. “Hey,” he says. The guy in the hoodie looks up, seeming startled. “Wanna be partners?”

The guy blinks at him, then shifts in his seat and motions to the empty chair on the other side of his desk. “Uh, yeah. Sure.”

“I’m Patton, by the way.”

“Virgil. What, uh, what are you studying?”

Patton pulls his laptop out of his bag. “Oh! I’m an early education major. What about you?” As he asks, Patton casts a quick glance at the laptop in front of Virgil and notices the stickers on it: SANDERS in messy black scrawl, a thundercloud with a bolt of lightning, a small circle with a paint-smear style gay pride flag, and a few music notes.

“Graphic design with a minor in music,” he replies. Patton notices him glancing at the buttons on Patton’s backpack that he threw in the empty chair beside him—some about cats, some about dogs, a heart with glasses that he thought was cute, and a pride pin from last year’s Pride week.

“That’s pretty cool. You play music?”

Virgil lifts a shoulder. “With my brother, mostly.”

“Wow. That’s… really awesome,” Patton says, sincerely impressed. He’d always loved music, but really only dabbled in the ukulele. He’d always thought musicians were cool: having skills like that took a lot of work, and a lot of dedication. That seemed pretty admirable to Patton.

Virgil smirks. “If you say so.”

“I do. I mean it.” For a fleeting moment, Virgil looks taken aback by the insistence in Patton’s voice. “What do you play?”

…

Present.

“Roman is totally the hot one,” Patton hears a girl behind him say to her friends.

“Elliot thinks he has a crush on Logan Berry, you know.”

“He’s gay?” The girl sounds surprised, but not hostile.

“Ace, I think. Panromantic, if the stickers on his laptop are anything to go by.” Patton recognizes that voice as one of the girls in the LGBTQ+ club that Patton was secretary for.

“You have class with him?”

“We had English 100 together freshman year. Elliot’s in class with him and Logan, though, and says they want to gag literally any time the two so much as talk to each other.”

Patton grins to himself. Subtlety when he had a crush had never really been Roman’s strong suit. That was another place where Virgil was markedly different from his twin brother. Both Roman and Virgil had ways of keeping their distance from others, but where Roman put up a front of fearlessness and confidence and friendliness… Virgil seemed more likely to withdraw into himself.

Patton had learned that, and many other things about Virgil, slowly as meetings for the research project gradually developed into hanging out regularly and casually. Patton picked up on things about Virgil relatively quickly. He gets quiet and irritable when he’s actually anxious about something. He tends to catastrophize, especially when it comes to academics. He hasn’t yet learned how to accept compliments—something Patton didn’t let deter him from giving them. He hopes that the more he’s able to expose Virgil to them, the easier it will eventually get for him to accept them.

Patton learned that Virgil is fiercely protective, too. The fastest way for Virgil to overcome his anxiety about a situation is usually when it’s related to someone he cares about. He still remembers the fire that had alighted in his eyes when someone had started harassing Roman when he, Patton, Roman, and Logan had been heading back from a party on a Friday night a couple of months ago. Logan had been the one to diffuse that particular situation, but Patton hadn’t missed the way Virgil hovered closer to his brother and looked ready to fight when he’d seen the shaken look in Roman’s eyes.

But then there were the softer moments from Virgil, too. The fleeting moments when Patton saw something gentle and relaxed from him that a secret part of Patton liked to believe were just for him. They were a sign of trust from Virgil, and Patton had always cherished that trust precisely because it was so rare.

   …

April. Sophomore year.

“What time is it?” Virgil asks with a yawn. He’s sitting on the floor of his dorm, his guitar in his hands. His back is leaned up against the drawers of his desk. Patton sits on the floor across from him with his back against the cinderblock wall and his legs stretched out in front of him.

Patton digs his phone out of his pocket and checks. “Almost 1 in the morning.”

Virgil nods and strums a few chords softly. “You’re welcome to stick around, Patton, but… y’know. It’s chill if you’d rather go home.”

Patton shakes his head “I like it here,” he says. For reasons he is still figuring out, there’s nowhere else he’d rather be.

Patton watches him; he watches the way Virgil’s bangs fall in a soft sweep across his face, the dark eyeshadow smudged under his eyes, the slight parting of his lips as he mouths unheard lyrics. He always loves watching Virgil play guitar. There’s something about watching him hold the light brown acoustic instrument—like it steadies him, like it’s a shield that protects him—that Patton can’t help but love. Virgil seems to… breathe easier when he has a guitar in his hands.

“Virgil? Can I ask you something?” Patton says suddenly.

Virgil glances quickly at him, then back down at the guitar in his hands. Avoiding his eyes. “Yeah. Sure.” His voice sounds oddly tight to Patton.

“Why do you play music?”

The question seems to catch him off guard. Virgil stops short for a moment, glancing back up at Patton. His hands still against the instrument, his eyes flit away in thought.

Then—to Patton’s surprise—he sets the guitar aside.

“It… gives me a space where I can… connect, I guess?” He rubs the back of his head, glancing at Patton as if unsure whether or not his own words made sense.

“Connect?”

“Well,” Virgil pulls his knees up to his chest and rests his chin on top of them, “Yeah. I’ve never been good at… at the whole…” He waves a hand and sighs. “At the whole ‘words’ thing that’s required for making friends or helping someone or… whatever. I’m always afraid I’m gonna say the wrong thing, or make them feel awkward, or… shit, I don’t know. But music is different. It…” He huffs a frustrated sigh as the words escape him. Then he tosses Patton a wry smile. “See what I mean? Words aren’t really my thing. Music is different, though.”

Patton nods. He glances around at the MCR and Dear Evan Hansen poster on walls of Virgil’s side of the room. “I think I get it. Music lets you speak from where you are emotionally at a given moment, and people can come to you—or your music—to find that connection and community. It… lets you express yourself, and by doing that, lets you connect to other people.”

When Patton looks back at Virgil, he’s looking at him with something like disbelief. But there’s a softness and light in his eyes that makes Patton’s stomach flutter. “Yeah,” Virgil says eventually. “Exactly.” Patton meets his gaze with a small smile, even as he feels suddenly like Virgil can see all the parts of himself that he wants to hide.

The corner of Virgil’s mouth quirks slightly and he digs a small purple leather notepad out of his back pocket. He grabs a pen from the top of his desk and scribbles something down.

“Whatcha writing?” Patton asks curiously.

Virgil folds it and slips it back into his pocket. “Nothing, Pat.” He still has that soft kind of smile and look in his eyes even as he grabs his guitar and pulls it back into his lap.

…

Present.

“Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for Planets Align!” The emcee shouts into the mic as he runs on stage and the band waves as they exit to the cheers of the crowd. Patton applauds them and briefly considers moving closer to the stage before deciding against it. He’d never done well with tight crowds.

The sun has dipped below the horizon now, the sky darkening quickly. The lights from the stage bleed out onto the grass clearing, providing some lighting of the crowd itself as well. The air is a bit colder now, but Patton doesn’t mind. Besides, all the people around him moving and dancing have helped keep it from getting too cold anyway.

“Next up, the ones you’ve all been waiting for. Let’s hear it for… SANDERS!”

Patton lets out a cheer as the crowd screams. He sees Virgil’s twin brother—though you’d never know it from how differently they do make up and their hair—run on stage with his arms up to encourage the crowd’s response. The cheers get louder, and Roman grins and strikes a hero pose. He’s energized. Patton smiles at his evident excitement.

Virgil follows behind him, an electric guitar strapped to his back. Even from his distance from the stage, Patton can see him shaking his head at his brother’s antics. He gives a small, appreciative wave to the crowd. His eyes scan it, and a part of Patton can’t help but wonder if he’s looking for him someone.

Reasoning, though, reminds him that Virgil said he always tries to get a feel for the size of a crowd when he goes out on stage at a venue for the first time. It had started as a nervous thing—how many people might see me fail?—but as Virgil’s confidence in performing grew, it had mostly just become a habit.

“What is UP, everybody?” Roman says into the mic. He’s wearing a bright red leather jacket with a white shirt underneath, shiny gold skinny jeans, and red high top converse. “We’re so glad you could come out tonight. How about this awesome weather, yeah?”

More cheers. Patton watches as Virgil pulls the guitar from around his back with a smile. He’s in his familiar hoodie, purple shirt, black ripped skinny jeans, and his black sneakers with purple laces. At first glance, he doesn’t seem too nervous—Patton had long ago gotten in the habit of glancing at him to check if he’s okay when he knows Virgil might be getting anxious—but it’s hard to tell from this distance.

“My brother, Virgil, and I thought we’d kick things off with an original song. How’s that sound, guys, gals, and nonbinary pals?”  There’s louder cheering, and the two of them waste no time starting a song that Patton remembers from previous concerts of theirs he’d attended.

…

November. Junior Year.

Patton’s phone dings while he’s eating lunch in the student union and flipping through an education textbook to study for his quiz tomorrow on Vygotsky’s Zone of Proximal Development. Exams are quickly approaching, and Patton had always struggled to remember theorists’ names for some reason.

It’s a text from Roman. Is V with you?

Patton frowns and types back quickly. No. It’s Tuesday. Then he sends a second text. Why?

The student union is bustling with students breezing through to grab lunch before rushing off to the library or their class. Groups are clustered around tables to hash out the details of final projects as their deadlines approach in the next week or two. Exhausted English majors slump over their stale coffee cups and computers as they edit their final paper for the eighth time. Engineering students running on caffeine and spite chug another energy drink before hurrying off to the lab building. A couple others that Patton can see are watching Netflix in a desperate attempt to give themselves a break before plunging back into the grind of end-of-the-semester assignments.

Roman’s reply comes almost immediately. He sent me a single letter text which usually means he’s freaking out but idek where he is

Patton stands up and forgets his half-eaten sandwich, dropping it in the compost bin as he slings his backpack over his shoulder and hurries out of the building. Have you tried calling him?  He texts quickly.

R: Yeah. No response… just lemme know if you see him or if he texts you or something ok

Patton rolls his eyes. As if he’s just going to go about his day and not try to help. Especially if V might be freaking out. We’ll find him, Roman. You check the science center and I’ll check the music floor of Stokes Hall.

R: ok.

R: Thanks

Patton turns his ringer on at full volume and braces against the cold air as he hurries to the building beside the Student Union. The November air is biting. Students bustle with their noses tucked into their scarves and red fingers curled around coffee cups. There was no snow on the ground, but the grass still crunches under Patton’s shoes as he hurries across the quad towards Stokes Hall. His light blue beanie is pulled low over his light brown hair.

He’s wishing he had a scarf to hide his nose in—instead opting to try to tuck it into the sleeves of the sweatshirt tied around his shoulders—when he walks straight into someone.

“Shit! I’m so sorry—”

“Virgil?” Patton asks, immediately recognizing the voice. He looks up, and Virgil seems frozen for a moment. It only takes Patton a second to realize that his eyes are red and sunken slightly. His usual sweep of hair is a disheveled mess under the hood of his sweatshirt that engulfs his frame.

If Patton’s being honest, he looks… rough. Concern twists in Patton’s chest.

“I’m so sorry, Patton. I’m an idiot, I just wasn’t watching where—”

“Hey, it’s all good, Virge,” Patton says, quickly but sincerely. He places his hands on Virgil’s shoulder to anchor him. “Breathe.”

Virgil laughs but it’s humorless and shrugs out from under his grip. Patton frowns. “I’m fine. I know I look like a mess, but really. It’s fine now. I was just. Um. Coming outside for some air.”

Patton considers the deflection and decides to meet Virgil half-way. “I could use some too.”

“You don’t have to do that—”

“Honest, V. The cold air is kind of nice.” Patton slips his phone out of his pocket and sends a quick text to Roman. Got him. He offers a small, reassuring smile to Virgil.“ You wanna take a seat?”

Virgil meets his gaze, then glances away. He seems to think about it for a moment, then relents with a slight sag to his shoulders. “Sure. Fine.”

Patton wanders over to a bench across the pathway and takes a seat. He looks around as students rush quickly towards their classes, smiling brightly as a service dog trots dutifully beside his owner and pushes the button to open the door as the student hurries inside. He intentionally keeps his gaze from lingering on Virgil, even as he hesitates before sitting beside him.

Virgil waits until most of the students have rushed off before breaking the silence between them. “You aren’t going to ask?”

Patton glances over at him. “I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable, and you seemed reluctant to talk about it…. Should I ask?”

“No. Yes?” Virgil groans, zipping up his hoodie against the chilly air. “It wasn’t anything like. That bad. Y’know? I just get… anxiety attacks sometimes, and sometimes they get…” He trails off. Patton senses more than sees the way Virgil glances quickly at him. “Anyway. I’m fine now.”

Patton isn’t sure what to say. He’d known for a long time now that Virgil struggled with anxiety. That Virgil had anxiety attacks doesn’t exactly surprise him, and it definitely isn’t off-putting or anything of the sort. But Patton hates the way Virgil keeps trying to deflect… something. Judgement. Concern. Patton suddenly and fiercely wishes Virgil would just let someone care about him. Let someone love him.

Patton thinks maybe he already does.

“Virgil….” Patton says softly, looking at his hands folded between his knees, “It’s okay. You know that, right? You can talk to me about it. And I’m not gonna judge you or think you’re weird or that there’s anything wrong with you.”

“I… I’m fine.”

Patton lifts a shoulder. “Okay. But… it’s okay if you aren’t, too. And either way… you’re definitely not alone. You know? You know Roman’s there for you, but… but I am too. I care about you.”

In his peripheral, he sees Virgil look at him. “Patton—”

“There you guys are!” Roman exclaims as he jogs up to the two of them. Patton smiles at Virgil—who looks, for all the world, like the ground has shifted underneath him.

Patton wants to ask him why. He never does.

…

Present.

SANDERS has played through five songs, which means they’re nearing the end of their set. Patton is beaming. Virgil and Roman play off each other so well, and their music seems to be a blend of both of them in a way. They balance each other on stage. They’re fun to watch. Patton can’t help but think, though he may be biased, that if they really wanted to… they could make a career out of it.

But then they do something that surprises Patton, and apparently everyone else too from the way the crowd starts to murmur.

Virgil trades out his electric guitar for his light brown acoustic one. Roman grabs a wooden stool from one of the wings and sets it in the middle of the stage. Virgil adjusts the strap of the guitar around his shoulders, nodding his thanks to Roman.

“So I hope you all don’t mind if we close out with something a little different than our usual pace,” Virgil is saying into the wireless mic attached to him. “But I lost a bet against Roman, and that means I gotta do this.”

“If I lost I was gonna have to wear jorts for this concert. You all should be thanking me,” Roman quips back through his own mic. There’s a chuckle from Virgil as well as the crowd.

“Yeah, well. This is a song I wrote over the course of… probably about a year. It’s about someone very… important to me. He couldn’t be here tonight, but… he’s pretty great. Anyway, it’s a little different, so uh.” Even under the stage lights, Patton thinks he can see Virgil flushing slightly. “I hope you all like it.”

Virgil starts strumming and all Patton can do is watch him, transfixed by the sound of an acoustic guitar and the sight of Virgil under a spotlight on stage. It’s a much softer song already than any other song in their entire set. Virgil ducks his head slightly, his black sneaker tapping out the ¾ meter. And then Virgil starts to sing.

“When I was younger I saw my daddy cry, and curse at the wind.

He broke his own heart and I watched as he tried to reassemble it.

And my momma swore that she would never let herself forget.

And that was the day that I promised I’d never sing of love if it does not exist.

But darlin’ you are the only exception. You are the only exception…”

As Virgil sings, Patton can’t help but feel rooted to the spot. Virgil sitting and playing his acoustic guitar reminds Patton suddenly of that moment again back in Virgil’s dorm room. That moment of honesty and openness from him that always felt so rare. Patton feels like he’s experiencing that again, despite the crowd and the spotlights. Because this is not performance-Virgil, this is just…. Virgil. At his most honest. At his mot exposed. And it’s breathtaking.

Patton doesn’t even fully realize that he’s moving closer to the stage until he almost trips over a girl that’s swaying and holding her phone with a flashlight up in the air.

Virgil breaks into the second verse, and Patton feels his stomach fluttering all over again at the sound of his voice.

“Well maybe I know somewhere deep in my soul that love never lasts.

And we’ve got to find other ways to make it alone or keep a straight face.

And I’ve always lived like this. Keeping a comfortable distance.

And up until now I had sworn to myself that I’m content with loneliness,

‘Cuz none of it was ever worth the risk.

Well you are the only exception. You are the only exception…”

And a part of Patton—a part he’s afraid to admit to—suddenly starts to grow insistent with the realization that he might be really, truly, unequivocally in love with the person singing on the stage in this moment. The one with his bangs falling into eyes that had always looked to Patton to be a little bit afraid and a lot brave.

This song, this moment, is no exception to that. Music, for Virgil, had always started from some place deeply personal. It is what allows him to connect to others, after all. And Patton doesn’t know if the song is about him, but he wants it to be. Because that deeply personal space that Virgil is singing from resonates with Patton in a way that leaves only one thought repeating in his head. I love you, I love you, I love you.

Almost as if he hears the thought itself, Virgil looks up and starts scanning the crowd again as he reaches the bridge.

“I’ve got a tight grip on reality  

But I can’t let go of what’s in front of me here.” He’s scanning, scanning, scanning…

“I know you’re leaving in the morning. When you wake up,

Leave me with some kind of proof it’s not a dream. Oh…”

And then his eyes settle squarely on Patton, and Patton swears he hears the very faint catch of Virgil’s breath through the mic.

Patton gives him a small, faint smile. There’s a brief moment where uncertainty flickers through Virgil’s dark eyes, and then something sets firmly in them. As if he’s made some kind of split-second decision. Virgil stands up from the stool and starts making his way towards the stage stairs, continuing to play and sing as he does so.

“You are the only exception. You are the only exception….”

Patton loses sight of him as he steps down to ground level, the crowd blocking his view. But Virgil keeps singing that line over and over, you are the only exception, as if imploring Patton to hear it and understand it and know it is meant for him. As if perhaps Virgil has to repeat it himself to fully believe in its truth, but each time he sings it, Patton can hear the conviction growing. Far ahead of him, Patton can see people shifting around in the mosh pit in front of him.

Patton doesn’t move. He doesn’t think he knows how to.

And then through the crowd of people in front of him steps Virgil, still playing. Still singing. And Patton can’t help but notice his eyes look wide and scared and vulnerable—but unwavering—as he sings the final line.

“But I’m on my way to believing…”

He plays the final chord and stands there, looking up at Patton. He’s so close. The guitar and a few inches is all that separates them. Patton swallows past the lump in his throat and brings a hand up to cup Virgil’s jaw before leaning his forehead against Virgil’s and whispering.

“Can I kiss you?”

His eyes are closed, so he doesn’t see Virgil’s relieved, crooked grin. But he feels it when Virgil presses his lips to his own.

#sanders sides #sanders sides fanfiction #romantic moxiety #moxiety #romantic moxiety fanfiction #fluff #crowds #cursing #kissing #softness #sappiness #virgil sanders #patton sanders

[cilliansaccent]

The Peaky Designer - Cillian Fanfic, Chapter 16

Hello, welcome back. Below is the next instalment of my fanfiction!

Leave a like or a comment if you liked it, or if I can do anything better! Please, it would mean the world and to understand if anyone is enjoying my writing. Also, sharing/reblogging would be even better.

PLEASE READ:

I will not be including Cillian’s family as it’s kinda weird since he has children lmao. Just a mention of his parents and a previous lover.

I will indicate in a chapter if there is smut in the beginning and before the actual scene!!

I will add trigger warnings if there is any!!

There is a variety of levels of swearing during a chapter, I will not hold back, everyone swears.

The timestamp for the Fic is now 2016 and onwards!!

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Background: Gabrijela Babic is a Croatian girl from Sydney, Australia. She is born in the year 1991 on the 24th of December. She studies a Fashion degree in a University with a major in Game Design as well. Her teacher in the fashion designer class managed to nail an Internship on the set of Peaky Blinders with the shows very own Costume Designer, Allison McCosh. There, she travels to London for under a year to learn how to be one, working alongside the actors as well the man she admires, Cillian Murphy. But, her platonic feelings for the man begins to grow into something more, and she wonders whether she should pursue them or let him go for fear of her strict parents and her three older brothers…

Characters:

Swantje Paulina as Gabrijela Babic (swalina on Instagram)

Cillian Murphy

Word Count: 3,497

!!Warnings!!: Major sex scene at the end. 

Date: January 2017

Chapter Name: One Last Time

Brief Chapter Outline: Cillian and Gabrijela spend their last day together doing whatever they can before they end it with some heated passion...

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Cillian's brother dropped them at the airport before he bid farewell to them both. It was another early morning start but they had to get home as early as possible so Gabrijela could start packing and figuring out what to send via post. They checked in, wandered around the airport for a bit and ate before they headed through to the boarding gate. As they sat and waited, Cillian had his arm around her shoulder, his cheek against her head that rested on his shoulder. 

She scrolled through her Instagram, she remembered he had caught her on her fandom account and she was red-faced when she showed him what she posted. It was a multifandom account, and she posted various textposts, fan art and the like of her favourite books or TV Shows. "Still makes me chuckle you posted such old photos of me with those funny captions or whatever you'd call them." Cillian murmured. She rolled her eyes, "Shut up. I was and still am a dedicated fan!" "Well, now you are more than a fan to me." He pressed a kiss to her forehead. "Mhm." She tilted her head back and kissed him softly before she resumed her scrolling. But before she was going to tuck her phone away she came across a photo in the explore section of the app. "Oh, good god." She whispered in shock, "Cilly look." She showed him a photo of them both. It was more distanced but blurry so you couldn't make it out who she was really. It was when they were waiting at the airport coming to Cork. "Who took it?" He looked at it, frowning. He knew she wouldn't post anything of their relationship online, they had a talk about it and she was super respectful about it. "No idea. Just says someone had taken it. Maybe it's from Twitter." She felt worry ease into her. She hoped there weren't other sneaky photos of her and Cillian online. She never really said she was going overseas to her online fanbase either, just to her close friends back at home and the ones she made at Uni. "I'm sorry." He said as he ran his hand up and down her arm. "What for?" She looked up at him, confused as to why he would apologise. "For that." He gestured to the photo, "I should have been more thoughtful of those things." He began to let her go. "Cillian, no. Hey," she took his hands as she faced him, "I knew that something like this would happen on the end. I don't want it to ruin what we have." She didn't want him holding back on her when they were out in public. "I don't want you to be plastered all over the internet, either." He squeezed her hands. "I mean, my face is already on the internet. My accounts are not private." She shrugged. "I'll take a look on Twitter but... It doesn't bother me much. Unless you don't want the word going out about you being with someone." "I don't really like the idea of people being too into someone else's life. I'm just concerned about how it would be interpreted by everyone." He said. "Mm. I agree. They can be quite cruel. I've seen how people can react to their idols being with someone else... But again, Cillian, I don't want to like... Not be romantic when we are out in public. I want us to be just us, holding hands and all that. I couldn't care less what online haters would think about." She cupped his jaw. "Are you sure?" He asked. "I am. I can handle it. Besides, if there is an issue, who cares hm? They don't know us." She kissed him lightly. "If you say so." He said as his arm went back around her and they resumed their position. He would still be worried either way.   It was time to board and they detached themselves from each other and picked up their bags. They lined up with the other people, holding hands. She would not let the online images hurt them. When it came to showing affection, she didn't want to hide it. "Um, excuse me," Someone tapped Gab on her shoulder. She turned to see three girls looking at them keenly, "Are you dating Cillian?" She asked, eyes darting to their held hands and to Cillian who also turned to see them. They seemed quite surprised at the sight of Gabrijela, she could see it in their eyes. Cillian had replied instead, "We are. Why do you ask?" "There are rumours online, uh, photos popping up. The fans are uh, going crazy about it. Kinda a big deal, cause no one um... well expected..." She trailed off when Gab and Cillian turned away to get through the gates. Gabrijela gave Cillian a little giggle as they stepped through and headed down the hallway. "Seems like more photos." He said, frowning deeply. "It's fine Cillian, don't stress." She squeezed his hand. They got into the plane and took their seats, this time he was beside the window. The whole ordeal started up again but Cillian comforted her, and she settled faster with his gentle and caring words. She cuddled him throughout the trip, the turbulence was pretty bad as they went through a storm. He wrapped his jacket around her shoulders and made the scarf that she stole from him as a pillow on his shoulder. But after an hour and a half or so, they landed safely and got off the plane. The girls that spoke to them before seemed to follow them. "We got a bit of a party following us," Gabrijela said to Cillian as they headed towards the many taxis that waited. He glanced over his shoulder and chuckled, "It seems so." He hailed down a taxi and got their stuff into the boot before he held open the door for her. "Tough they won't see much anymore." She laughed and got into the car and he got in after her. It was nice to be back home now, they headed upstairs and she laid on his bed, "Ooooo," She groaned, "Cillys bed... So good." She giggled as he crawled up over her, laying down on her but not enough to crush her. He kissed her neck, "You miss it?" He asked. She giggled, "Yeah I did." She turned so she was now looking up at him. She leaned up and kissed him, "We gotta keep moving though. I have to go back to the apartment to pack up the remaining things there and clean up." He nodded and got off her. They had a quick bite before they headed over to her apartment. They packed up whatever she had left behind into his car before they cleaned up the place. She threw out most of the old food that was left behind. The apartment was just like how she came to it. She had taken off the sheets to and left them as a neat pile. She left a wonderful card and a wine behind for the owner of the apartment before she finally said goodbye to the place. Heading back to Cillian's home, she spent it packing up her stuff. But she kept most of her souvenirs in her suitcase all wrapped up in clothing. She didn't want to send it via parcel. She had packed the majority, leaving out her new set of clothing for tomorrow. Every other bits and piece was easy to just shove into her carry-on. Cillian came up the stairs to see how she was going, "Damn you are quick," He said. "Yeah. Just need a scale to weigh the bag." She said. "Got it." He went to the wardrobe and pulled out the scale. They weighed and she had some more room to add a few more clothing in. Now she had two small piles of clothing to send off. "Let's head to the post office now." She said and they headed off. They did what they had to do, and she made sure she was to pay for the fees of the parcel. Since it was a nice day, Cillian decided to take her out to St. James' park to have brunch. He had a blanket in the back and they headed in a nicer part of the park, a little secluded. They set up and Cillian went to a nearby cafe he liked to buy them food. In the meantime, Gabrijela spoke to her dad on the phone and listened to him ask if she had everything packed and whatnot. He would call her in the morning before she would leave as well. She laid back on the blanket, a hand over her tummy. She listened to the hum of the city and the voices of people around her. Cillian returned with a bag, "I'm back. Bit of a hold-up but I'm here." He grinned as he sat down beside her. She sat up, "Thanks babe," She smiled and helped him take the stuff out. "Whatcha get?" "I got us both eggs and bacon, I got you hot chocolate as well. I also got capers for myself." He said. "Thank you," She leaned over and kissed him deeply. "Love you." "Love you too," He said and pecked at her lips before they both dug into their food. They finished up and Cillian disposed of their rubbish before he came back and they laid back together. She snuggled close to his chest, his arm around her shoulders. "I'm gonna miss this," She said, stroking his chest. "Same." He played with her hair, running his fingers through it. "You gonna miss me?" She looked up at him. "Of course I will. So much." He cupped her face. "I will make sure we can talk as much as possible, video and all." She said, leaning up to kiss him. "Sounds good." He murmured, kissing her back. They held each other for a bit like that, totally in their own world as they kissed slowly. They finally broke apart and packed up before he went back to the car to leave the blanket and came back to her. They took a walk around the park and Cillian listened to her talk about how she was going to dread going back in for the last year of her University course. "I've been doing good in my game design as well, so I might see if I can get into that." She said. "Not costume designing?" Cillian asked. "Dunno, I enjoyed it but... I was quite stressed. I don't like the feeling." She laughed softly. "But I'll see." They came back to the car and headed home. When she stepped through the door, Cillian closed it and then pulled her against him. She gasped, "What are you doing?" She laughed as he began to pepper her neck with kisses. "Kissing you." He said, his hands resting on her hips before they snaked up to cup her breasts. "I think you want more than kisses, babe." She moaned softly as he gripped them tightly. She was pushed up against a wall, "Cilly." He kept fondling her breasts, then began to unbutton her blouse and discarded it aside. She smirked and pushed her ass against his crotch, then began to grind against him. "Mmm babe, you like that huh?" She purred. His hands returned to her hips, "I do. Keep doing that love." He watched how she moved against him, his hands now moved back up her sides before he turned her around and kissed her deeply, his fingers tangling in her hair. She moaned as she gripped his shirt, lifting it up before she pulled it over his head. "I want... I want you to use something on me." She blushed, running her hands down his soft skin along his arms. "Yeah? What is it?" He kissed her again. "It's in the bedroom. Let's go there." She took his hand as he picked up their shirts and headed upstairs. She opened up her suitcase and pulled out a black bag. Then she held out an eight-inch long vibrator that was a sparkly purple. "I'm going to be honest, I've never seen them in person." Cillian laughed as he came over, taking it from her. "No?" She raised a brow, "Then where did you see it? In porn?" She brushed past him and laid on the bed, smirking. "Maybe." He chuckled and turned to her, "So you want me to tease you with this?" He turned it on. "Yeah." She nodded, parting her legs despite still got her pants on. He brought it to her crotch, and held it against her and watched how she let out a moan. "Mmm, let's take off these pants first." He said as he waited for her to take her jeans off and throw it aside. He got on the bed, kneeling between her legs as he returned the vibe to her core. She sucked in a breath, gripping the sheets. He had it on a low setting, stroking her up and down through her panties. "Ah..." She laid back, eyes closed as she enjoyed the feeling. "Cilly..." "We should turn it up now, don't want you to enjoy this too much." He said and turned it even higher. She gasped, bringing her legs up. "No, keep them down." He pinned them between his thigh and calves. She whined. Cillian continued to tease her, letting the tip roll over her clit which caused her back to arch then he dragged it back down and then inserted the toy into her. He pushed her leg open with one hand, eyes flicking from her core to her face. "God, Gabrijela." He loved the pleasure on her face, the need and desperation in her eyes. "Cillian! Please! I'm close!" She whined, twisting the sheets in her hands. "Not yet, love. Hold on for me." He said and pushed the toy in and out of her. He let go of her legs and leaned down, and wrapped his lips around her clit and began to suck hard. Her hands shot into his hair, the vibrations of the toy was intense and he kept pushing it against her g-spot. "Fuck! Cillian! Cilly!" She bucked her hips, her screams loud as she came, arching right off the bed. He kept going till she was done, groaning softly as he pulled the toy out, seeing how slick it was with her climax. "Fastest climax ever." He chuckled, kissing up her thigh to sit back. She panted, "I need you in me, Cillian. Oh god." She shook her head. "Mm, but you asked me to use this on you. So I will." He mused, "Lay on your side." She moved to her side as he got behind her, an arm went under her head and locked around her chest. He brought the vibrator back to her clit and began to tease her once more. "N-Not right after a climax! Fuck!" She stayed still for him, she wanted to be good for him. But she couldn't help but buck her hips. "Be still, love. Don't move too much." He kissed her neck, sucking on a spot. She whimpered, clinging to his arms that were around her, god he was relentless as he continued to prod and poke her sensitive clit. But then he decided to push it into her and she arched her back a little. "Cillian!" He claimed her lips once more and kissed her as he thrust the vibrator inside her, she was super slick so it moved in and out swiftly but he could feel when she clenched her walls the vibe got stuck. Gabrijela reached up and dragged her fingers through her hair, "I need you, Cillian, I want you inside me. Please." She begged, rolling her hips. "Yeah? How bad?" He tugged on her bottom lip. "Really bad, Cilly. Please don't make me wait." She could feel his hard cock press against her ass through his jeans. He let out a grunt and got her to hold the vibrator inside her as he pulled off his pants. Then he was back up against her, and removed the vibrator, "Tuck me in, love." He nibbled on her earlobe. She reached between her legs and found his waiting cock, "So hard, baby." She giggled and positioned him to her entrance. Then she tugged him and he was inside her in one swift movement. They both moaned in unison, "Hold your leg up, Gab." He kissed her neck then to her shoulder. She lifted her leg up and he placed the vibrator back on to her clit. She cried out softly, and he felt her walls tighten around him. "Mmm fuck, Gabrijela. Do that again." She nodded and clenched her walls, she could feel every hard inch of him, especially when he started to move. "Shit." She gasped. He kept his eyes focused on her face, enjoying how tight she was and how he managed to drag those cute little sounds from her. He thought about how lucky he was to have her as his girlfriend. He had wished for someone to come into his life and here she was. Here they were, making love. He loved her, truly, he loved her. He could not bring himself to think of any other woman but her. And his heart would hurt when she was no longer warming his bed. Gabrijela looked up, seeing the pure love and devotion in his eyes. "Cillian, I love you." She said through a moan, "I love you so much! Oh!" She could feel her climax start to build again, and this one was gonna be a big one. "I love you too, beautiful. Oh fuck, I love you!" He kissed her hard, pounding hard into her, the bed shaking a little. He will miss her. So he threw aside the vibrator, turning it off and laid her on her back and pushed right back into her with a groan. Her legs locked around his thighs and her arms around his back, her nails digging into his skin. "Fuck! Mark me Gabrijela, fuck." He cursed and kissed her again as her nails scraped down his skin. He moved fast and wild, all he wanted was to please her. Make sure she would feel this for days when she would return back to her home. "Mine!" He cried out, "You're mine, Gabbie." "All yours baby. I'm all yours." She cupped his face and kissed him passionately but it was messy as from his fast thrusting. "I'm gonna cum, Cilly. Oh god, don't stop. Oh please!" Cillian worked hard, panting hard, his moans loud and cracked occasionally before they got faster and faster before his climax tore through him like wildfire. She screamed out his name as she came with him, she felt his warm load fill her inside up as she clenched and locked him in as she finished with him. After some moments they calmed down, but he stayed on top of her and inside her. His head was tucked into her neck and kissing her flushed skin. She ran her hands up and down his back slowly, admiring the curves of his spine and the divots of his muscles in his shoulders. "My handsome man," She whispered, her fingers returning to the nape of his neck and playing with the soft curls of his hair. He let out a soft chuckle, "My beautiful woman." He said as he raised his head to look at her. "My love." He touched her cheek, stroking her skin with a thumb. "I love you with all my heart, Cillian." She said, leaning into the touch. He gave her that breathtaking smile and they kissed for some time, and when they managed to get their breath back they got back into lovemaking. It was slow and gentle, then hard and fast with many different positions. Any position that had her against his body. After they have worn each other out, they bathed and then spent the rest of the afternoon together in his home. He pulled out his guitar and sang for her, then made her the best dinner ever, watched a cute romantic film before they drank red wine in front of the fire. They never parted from each other, every minute they wanted to be close. And despite being worn out, they made love one more time in front of the fire. She rode him till he came twice in her before he lifted her up and carried her to bed. He laid her down and they cuddled naked, she faced him and snuggled into his chest. Today was a wonderful day, and she would remember it forever. "I love you," She said in the dark. "I love you too," Cillian replied, kissing her head before they both fell asleep holding each other.

#cillian murphy #thomas shelby #peaky blinders #fanfiction

[theinsanecrayonbox]

Digging your tabletop pride icons! I like the filter effect they have! :-) Do you by any chance have a textpost of the characters and their sexual orientations/gender identities? I recognise some of your characters, but not all of them, and there are pride flags I've never seen before, so I'd like to learn more. :-)

well thank you. it was just a bit of photoshop work.

i do not have a list of that made up yet...so lets do that now lol

let me preface this though with two points.; 1) i am 1 of 2 females who play regularly in my dnd group of 6 (sometimes 7) people, the other is Dixon. so i am usually the only female in the party itself. i have only ever played 2 (and a half) male characters in the 6/7 years i’ve been playing; every other male character i do in my tabletop group arts are story characters, not player characters. i am also 1 of 2 (sometimes 3) people in the group under 40. romance isn’t really a big part of our storytelling...no matter how hard i try to put it back in there ^^; 2) i identify as quoisexual myself, so all my characters have that to some degree in them just because i’m the player and you bleed into your characters that way. i also use goggle as a helpful tool to learn about all the different identities, so my knowledge and interpretation is fallible.

ok so list now;

Paige-Cupioromantic, meaning does not feel attraction, but desires that type of relationship i went with this, because Paige....well...is Paige lol. as one player once said “it feels wrong trying to date her, because she acts so young and innocent” and to be fair, she isn’t really out here looking at people as romantic partners. she wants friends, she loves her friends. also you know, mortal embodiment of an eldritch horror terror, so...

Cizma-Fraysexual, meaning has strong attraction until a relationship is formed and then the attraction fades she’s the opposite of Paige, and this is mostly based on her “relationship” with InkShade honestly; she believes she’s madly in love with him, but he refuses her, so she pursues him more. i think if he gave into hr advances and reciprocated, she’d realized her feelings weren’t what she thought they were. i admit, this one’s new to me so my interpretation could be very wrong, but that’s how i feel it fits Cizma.

Ada-Quoisexual, meaning has trouble distinguishing between romantic and sexual attraction as i said above, my default is this, so if i don’t know a character’s leanings it’s their too (yes jelena is my icon and is this too fyi). BUT in fairness, it suits Ada because of how she was raised; she has very little idea how to properly people here. and she is developing some sort of a relationship with Til. also, her first dice bag was my pride bag with this flag.

Gauzra-Lithoromantic, meaning has desires of attraction, but does not want them reciprocated again, kind of supposed to be in opposite to Ada, and seeing as i still don’t know Gauzra’s personality this could change...but from my interpretation of her right now, this feels right. plus the flag goes with her color scheme.

Rosalba-Demisexual, meaning does not feel attraction until a strong bond is formed at the time i was playing Ro, this was how i identified primarily, but it still suits her i think. if you met Rico after meeting her, you would never know WHY they were a couple, but those two kinda fought against two life times to be together (three if you count the accent into godhood). Ro’s also never been good at getting close to people, but once she did, you’re stuck with her.

K’nessan-Nonbinary, meaning does not identify with a binary gender scale; Marsic, meaning is attracted to masculine qualities ok, ok, *technically* since Ness is a hermaphrodite they should be inter-sexed BUT they do prefer the gender neutral pronouns (followed by the masc; never use “it/that’ or you will die)...and their color scheme matches the flag, so... ^^; i also included in the list the Marsic because Ness does have a preference for male partners

Nemo-Asexual, meaning has no desires for attraction Nemo is nothing but a hero, so that pretty much screamed ace to me...plus it matched her color scheme

Mekala-Aromantic, meaning has no desire for attraction i wasn’t really sure about her, since you know 2 failed campaigns in a row didn’t give her much room to grow, but i could see this working. she’s not really looking for anything, more searching her past. 

Jass-Bisexual, meaning attracted to both males and females Jass is my sabretooth, so my sabretooth headcanons are canon for her lol. we only saw her have a relationship with fantasy!Deadpool in the game she was played, but hey

Tesla-Electio Aroace, meaning has no desire for attraction, whether sexual, romantic, or tertiary  i admit, this one is completely new to me, so my interpretation could be very wrong, but the idea that this is one that is uninterested in any form of attraction suits my viral android very well. again, she has gone on record saying that “the biological imperative for emotions is distractive” (more or less) which is especially funny since she was played in a valentines game where the goal was to let Cupid infect a town with horniness to make babies; Tesla was the only one unaffected and actively trying to stop that. so yeah.

Theo-Pansexual, meaning is attracted to any gender yeah, Theo’s just out there doing and being anything

Sean-Bisexual, meaning attracted to both males and females; he however has a stronger male preference i admit, one reason why Sean is bi and not just gay is for the “half and half” joke...but yeah, he started the game with a boyfriend, he would kill everyone for his boyfriend, he woudl die for his boyfriend.

Vitanya-Gynosexual, meaning attracted to feminine qualities still learning new things as we do this, but since Vita has had little development (but will be getting more) i’m kinda aiming to have her be a bit more into girls...we’ll see how that pans out

Lokaj-Androsexual, meaning attracted to masculine qualities originally i had him as something else, but when i saw that description i liked it better, since he ended up with Arkos and all

Arkos-Transgender, meaning identifies with a different physical gender than the one assigned at birth; Gay, meaning attracted to men going more off the latest version here than my previous one for this. but yeah, he’s just straight up trans here, not intersexed, and his tribe is cool with it. plus being a tribe means not enough money to get magic to physically change anything...but he’s ok with that. in his tribe it’s less what you have and more how to act.

Rikkar-Bisexual, meaning attracted to both males and females mainly because he did have a fiance...even though they weren’t super into the idea, they weren’t against it either...but he’s far more into Ark

Tarn-Lesbian, meaning attracted to women she has been a loud raging lesbian since day one, and nothing will ever change that. not even one continuity having her in a forced, bested in trial by combat, marriage to Starlord basically. she will only go for a dude if he’s a dragon...and he’s gotta be a hot dragon...and even then it win’t lasting dude.

Reyzah-Abrosexual, meaning one’s attraction is constantly changing or fluid Reyzah started as a knock-off tarn honestly and never got to thrive too much. but compared to her siblings, she was always the one learning and trying to figure herself out, so this fits well.

Margus-gay, meaning attracted to men Margus, similarly to his sister, started off as quiet nervous gay, and by the end of the adventure he had himself a doppleganger husband and confidence to boot, so yeah, my baby boy grew up good. admittedly a lot of his self-confidence issues were more from his half-orc heritage, BUT that fed into the “no one would wanna date me cause i suck” mentality. so yeah.

Nikkos-Asexual, meaning feels no desire for attraction he’s Margus’ twins, and was always intended to be some sort of ace. the joke being the Ironbrood kids are a full set; likes girls, likes guys, figuring things out, likes doughnuts. i waffled over making him a more defined type though...but since i’ve only played him for like one session as a background character, i’m not sure where he’s at. so general ace is fine. he loves and supports his siblings, and is best uncle to Margus’ kids anyways, so s’all good.

Jelena-Quoisexual, meaning has trouble distinguishing between romantic and sexual attraction i know i said up in Ada’s that Jelena was this too, but here i am saying it again since she’s my actual icon and not in the reffed to image set. i haven’t played her, so this could change...but i’m very self projecting on her during quarantine to begin with, so yeah she’s quoi until proven otherwise ^^;

so hope you found this informative...and that my information isn’t too terribly off ^^;;;

#kp answers asks #dnd stuff #pathfinderstuff #my ocs #my writing

[thesunshine-hunk]

What about writing Hunk showing Lotor earth things and Lotor does the same for galra things? They're two cuties and they should do cute stuff together

Ok so, before you start reading this. I’ve mention that the age gap between Lotor and Hunk makes me uncomfortable. I didn’t actually think about the age gape stuff until this month (I realize a ton of shit late sry) So this fic I wrote is taking place ten years after the war, when Hunk has had his space puberty and he is living his dream. At least he is an adult. And yes Lotor is alive ofc. I hope you enjoy this, it is late now and im tired so excuse for the mistakes 

“What are you laughing at?” Lotor asked as he took a seat beside Hunk. It has past ten year since the war was over. Lotor had been visiting the Earth plenty since then. He had been getting closer to team Voltron as time passed.

It didn’t surprise the team when Hunk was the one Lotor was closest to. Lance would even sometime act like Lotor stole his ´best-friend´ spot.

“It is just a meme post.” Hunk laughter sounded like melodic to in Lotor´s ears. He stared to long at Hunk than he needed to, but it didn’t seem like Hunk minded it.  “M-Meme?”  The laugher stopped, but it was still a smile on Hunk´s face. “Yeah, meme. It is like an image or  a textpost that is really funny, and it goes viral through the internet.” Lotor looked even more confused than he was a second ago.

That was how Lotor and Hunk ended up spending their whole day in the sofa, Hunk showing Lotor memes. Hunk has never seen Lotor laugh so much in the ten years they knew each other. He didn’t realize how much he adored to see the other man sitting close to him, leaning towards the phone he was holding. Lotor was so close that Hunk could smell the shampoo he used.

“This is unbelievable!” Lotor let out a chortled laugher. The video he was showing Lotor wasn’t really funny, but Hunk couldn’t help but chuckle. “Yeah, the cat is really cute too.”

Hunk was starting to run out of memes to show Lotor, and they both decided to watch a movie instead. It didn’t take long for Lotor to fall asleep on the other man. It wasn’t the first time Lotor had fallen asleep on Hunk, but it was the first time Hunk was feeling a warm feeling in his stomach. It was a tickling feeling and it made Hunk feel to embarrassed to look at Lotor.  “It is probably nothing…” Hunk thought, as he tried to fall asleep, but totally failed. He instead stayed awake, listening to Lotor´s sleeping breath and humming a song low.

– 

Lotor has countless time asked for Hunk to visit him.

When Hunk finally had time, he visited Lotor. They both were currently on a Galra fleet, heading towards who-knows-where. “Hey, I thought we were going visit a planet or something?” Hunk tried to keep up with Lotor, as they both were walking down the halls. “Yes, we will but first I have to show you something.” Lotor said with a smile on his face. Hunk recognized the look as the ones Lotor had when he was giving other gifts. The yellow paladin let the other half-galra guide him around the ships. It didn’t take long before they arrived at their destinations. When the heavy metal doors slide open, Hunk immediately recognized the room as Lotor´s bedroom. Hunk couldn’t help but feel a little shy as he stepped inside the bedroom.

Lotor walked over beside his bed and grabbed a glass dome which was on his nightstand. Hunk – being the curios guy he is – walked closer to Lotor, until he was standing in front of him. “What is this?” Hunk asked, as he watched a dark purple flower floating inside of the glass dome. “It is a Galra flower, the only one in the universe left.” Hunk didn’t noticed he had whispered until Lotor whispered back at him. He gently touched the glass as he pulled his gaze from it to Lotor. “What is the name of the flower?” For some reason, it felt like Hunk was pulled forwards to Lotor. The other man whispered something in the Galra tongue. “It means ´the one who is left standing in the blood´.” Lotor explained to the yellow paladin.

Hunk felt a hand on his cheek, and his heart stopped for a tick. “What a beautiful name for a beautiful flower.” Hunk could feel the breath of Lotor, and it sent goosebumps through his body.

“Just like you…”

#ok this legit sucked lmao #voltron #voltron: legendary defender #hunk garrett #hunk vld #prince lotor #vld lotor #lotunk #asks #headcanons #fics

[steinfeldofrph]

↱ GIF MAKING TUTORIAL ↲

as requested by a lovely anon, here is a tutorial on how i make my gifs. this probably isn’t the best way out there and you don’t have to use this way but it’s helped me make at least 20-50 gifs in an hour depending on how fast your computer/laptop is so let’s get right in

note: i am sometimes not the best at explaining so if you need any more clarification on anything, please message me

you will need (or what i used):

photoshop cc 2017 (you can download the one i use here but if you have a photoshop that supports gif making you should be able to follow along decently)

PotPlayer (can be downloaded here)

a video from a torrent, download, youtube etc

a windows computer/laptop

a psd (this tutorial WILL NOT cover colouring)

this action that i created (more about it in the tutorial) - DO NOT STEAL/REDISTRIBUTE/CLAIM AS YOUR OWN

what this tutorial will cover:

how to cap

where to find videos

how to use a psd

save settings

easy way to make a gif quickly

some tips

and this is the gif i created:

PLEASE LIKE/REBLOG IF THIS HELPED YOU

1. okay so firstly you need to find your video. i use websites, torrents and youtube clips. if you want to know what torrents i use etc please hit me up OFF ANON. so once you have your video downloaded (a tutorial on how to download torrents can be found here, you will need potplayer opened so open that and it should look like this.

2. awesome! once you have that open click those three bars on the top left hand corner and this menu should pop up

3. if you have a video downloaded then you click “open file” but if you want to use a youtube video click “open” and then “open url” and just enter the youtube url and voila you’ll have the youtube video opened! so i’m going to be using this youtube video so i’ve put the url in now so now my potplayer looks like this. TIP: use a 720p or 1080p video for the best quality. to change the quality in youtube videos, click the gear at the bottom (not all videos allow you to go higher than a certain quality so keep that in mind)

and if your video has subtitiles and you don’t want them then go back to menu, click the subtiles bar and uncheck “show/hide subtitles”

4. now we go to the part which you want to gif so go and find it i’m going to be using this scene

5. now click “cntrl g” and this screen should pop up

now at the top where it says storage, just change it to the folder you want to save the caps in and you can just use the same settings i do!

now i tend to go back just a few seconds before the actual scene and then click start! now potplayer is capping the scene you want and once it’s over you click stop!

6. potplayer has done capping and this is what my folder looks like. 

i know what you’re thinking “woah sofia that does not look like the scene you were talking about earlier” and you’re 100% right! now we are going to delete the caps we don’t need so click the first cap on the left and hit control and scroll down until you see the scene you originally wanted to gif. and if you’ve capped scenes after the scene you wanted gif do the same at the bottom as well!

so after i’ve done all that, this is what my folder looks like!

7. now that does look like the scene i’m giffing! now we can open photoshop! so open up your photoshop and go to file >> scripts >> load files into stack (here’a visual representation)

and now this box will come up:

8. click browse and find the folder in which you put your caps in. then select the first image, click control and scroll until you come to the end of what you want to gif (i wouldn’t recommend exceeding past 70 frames personally) and click okay and wait for the caps to load. once they’ve loaded (you’ll be able to click the ok button) and well... click the okay button. 

9. now just wait for all the caps to load!!

10. okay now that all of your caps are loaded your photoshop should look like this

11. remember that action i was talking about at the top of the tutorial? well we are going to use that now so load it into photoshop (a tutorial on how to do that is here) so now that your action is loaded the actions menu should look something like this:

12. see that play button? the one shaped like a triangle? click that but make sure the “by steinfeldofrph” is highlighted so the whole action is played!

now you’re probably thinking, “um sofia what does it do tho?” and here’s what it does: crops the gif, resizes it to 268x140px, applies a sharpening action, and changed the frame delay to 0.07 and looping options to forever. of course if you don’t like those setting you can very much change them but it may be a little tricky but if anyone needs a new action made, please let me know and i’ll gladly assist!

13. so this is what our photoshop looks like now:

(i changed the timing to 0.06 and it’s really easy to change timings, just clikc one of the mini arrows on the frames, select “other” and insert whatever timing you want! generally people tend to use 0.05-0.09 but it’s all personal prefernce in my opinion)

14. at this point if you’re happy with your gif, you can save it and if you want to know how to save then just go past these few steps but if you want to apply a psd and all, keep reading! so now i open the psd i want to use. you do this by going to file >> open and then finding the psd file wherever you saved it. once that’s opened your photoshop should look something like this:

(yes that is the exact same gif)

15. your psd file will have a folder so select it by clicking it once, right click that folder and select duplicate folder and this window should come up:

and select document: “untitled 1″ and the click ok! now if you go back to untitled 1 aka your gif you should see it’s now this:

so our gif without the psd was:

but with the psd it looks like this:

just brighter and less dull! so now we are going to save!

16. go to file at the top bar and go down until you see “save for web and devices”. if you’re a photoshop cc user then it’s file >> export >> save for web (legacy)... now this screen should show up:

17. and these are my save settings:

18. now before we click save we need to check the file size. if you want to upload it as a photo or part of a gifset, 3MB is the limit however if you want to post it into a textpost, the limit is still 2MB so keep that in mind. to check the limit you just go to the bottom left hand corner of the screen that looks like this:

and see that number below GIF, we wanna check that so as long as it’s below 3.00M or 2.00M, you’re good to go and if it’s in the k’s it’s below 1MB so you’re still good! well my gif qualifies so i just click save and i find the place i wanna save it in and voila one gif saved and ready to go!

some tips from me:

you can take this a step further and load multiple scenes as untitled-1, untitled-2 etc to as many as your computer can handle, extend the action so it records you saving your gif in a location/folder but your should only do this if a) you don’t want to apply a psd b) you are confident you don’t want to change timings c) your psd is actually an action so you can colour within the action and just click save d) you save the psd in a folder that is your main folder and just empty it out every time you’re done with a set of gifs otherwise you have to record it saving every time in a new folder

like i said if you like to colour yourself or have a fave psd that works on nearly everything, record that as an action and play it after you’ve cropped, resized atc to save you even more time

if you want help on doing either of those let me know 

i know it seems long but once you get the hang of capping the actual gif making is pretty short!

happy giffing and once again if you have any questions, please message me no matter how stupid you think it is and since i am not the best explainer because trust me, someone else probably has the same question but they are way too shy to ask me so you’re doing them a favour!

#itsphotoshop #yeahps #completeresources #gif tutorial #rph #mine* #tutorial*