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cottonlemonade · 3 months

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Confessions After Hours

word count: 1124 || avg. reading time: 5 mins.

pairing: Akiteru x chubby!Reader

genre: fluff, friends to lovers

warnings: like one time swearing

synopsis: Akiteru accidentally confesses to you

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You looked outside the café windows for the fourth time in the last 5 minutes, it was past closing time, all the cleaning was done and your fellow part-timers had already left. So you just tried to find some busy work to have a somewhat legitimate reason to stall. The rain was getting worse and by now you were pretty sure Akiteru wouldn’t come.

It’s not like it was an actual plan, you reminded yourself, it was just kind of implied that he wanted to walk you home but no one could expect him to go out in this weather.

And so you hummed to yourself while carefully brushing down mint leaves and edible flowers with egg whites and sugar.

Your mood dropped a little when you checked the clock again. You had been looking forward to spending time alone with Akiteru.

Of course, you had little hope that he was interested in you romantically but that didn’t stop you from dreamily staring at him during study sessions or making a fool of yourself whenever possible - like running into a glass door when he smiled at you like last week.

When you laid the sugar coated decoration out on a baking sheet, a familiar figure caught your eye.

He stood on the other side of the road, waiting for a safe crossing. Quickly you walked over to the front door to unlock it and let him in.

“Ugh, wet.”, he commented, waddling in.

“Why didn’t you bring an umbrella?”, you asked incredulously when he pulled back his drenched hood and shook his soaked hair like a dog.

“We only have one and one of the others got it tonight.”, he explained as if that was normal.

You swallowed the start of what would probably be a rather long discussion about why it wasn’t smart that 4 roommates shared a singular umbrella and so instead opted for “You should get out of those wet clothes before you catch your death.”

He gave you an overly dramatic look of shock, clutching his soaked collar like a Victorian lady.

“Oh, grow up!”

Together you peeled him out of his hoodie (his t-shirt underneath was dry for the most part) and you considered the dripping bulk of fabric for a second, before making a decision.

Wringing out as much of the excess water as possible over the kitchen sink, you then opened the still warm oven from the banana bread you made earlier and placed the black hoodie on a baking sheet inside.

Akiteru watched you with crossed arms and then asked in complete earnest, “How long do you think it needs?”

“I don’t know, Akiteru. I have never baked hoodie before. I’d give it like 5 minutes and then I’ll turn it over. We’ll see.”

To warm him up you brewed him a big mug of coffee in the already cleaned machine. A gesture that didn’t fail to impress. “I have never felt this special in my life.” He wrapped his large hands around the steaming cup and breathed in the cozy coffee scent.

“Don’t get used to it.”, you said, smiling, taking a sandwich and a bowl of fruit you had prepared for him earlier out of the fridge.

“This café has such excellent service. Thank you.”

You pulled a folder of various papers from a shelf, turning pages as if to check things - he didn’t need to know that you were just pretending. “So, how is the Kei situation - still hating the club?”

“Not so much hating, I’d say indifferent, which somehow is almost worse.”

“How come?”

“At least hate would indicate a strong emotion.”, he said wisely, plopping a grape in his mouth and feeding you one, too, while you were “busy” tapping something on your phone’s calculator and writing gibberish numbers on a slip of paper. When his fingertips accidentally brushed your lips in the process your brain came to a full stop.

“But the spring tournament is right around the corner and I am almost sure he is actually starting to enjoy himself - a little.”

Another grape.

He took a sip of coffee and sighed.

“Your coffee tastes like a hug.”

Your eyes lit up. “I… that is the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me. You mean, like a good hug though, right? Not one of those half-assed one armed thingies.”

He spluttered into his mug and coughed to clear his throat.

“Yes, a good hug. Both arms, full body contact. I am talking full-on cocoon.”

With a bragging smile, brain still fried, you said “I’ve been told I give pretty amazing hugs like that.” proudly pushing your chin up.

“Oh yeah? Well then let’s see what you got.”

You thought for a second, then dropped your highly important paperwork back on the counter. “Let’s have a look at your hoodie first, don’t want it to get too dark.”

A moment later you stood across from each other stretching as if getting ready for a fight. “Alright, little one. Give it your all.”, he said and opened his arms.

He had been ready for a lot of things. He had held your hand before, when navigating through a crowd (only as friends of course), so he was no stranger to the tingles your touch sent through his body.

What he hadn’t been ready for was your head to be leaning against his chest and your hands gently stroking over his back. He returned the hug immediately, placing one hand on your back and one gently cradling your head, resting his cheek against your temple. A perfect fit. It was better than he had ever imagined. Where did they even make people as soft and heavenly squishy as you? For many hasty heartbeats he held you like this. Then you gave the smallest sigh and actually snuggled even closer to him. He couldn’t take it. It was too much. And so without thinking in one quiet breath he let out, “Shit, I’m so in love with you.”

He felt you stiffen in his arms and prepared for the worst. You lifted your head to look at him, your eyes sleepy like you had been about to doze off.

Akiteru loosened his arms so you could pull away like you undoubtedly were going to. But you didn't.

"I'm... I'm sorry that was really stupid.", he said quickly.

"Don't worry, I accidentally tried freezing a cucumber last week. You're good.", you said in a drowsy sort of way.

"What?"

He didn't know what to do. You hadn't pulled away. You weren't screaming or running away or hitting him. Instead, you got on your tip-toes, a hand on his chest and smiled, before you set the softest kiss against his surprised lips.

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#tsukishima akiteru x reader #Akiteru x Reader #haikyuu x chubby reader #Akiteru x chubby reader #tsukishima akiteru fluff #Haikyuu Akiteru #Haikyuu tsukishima Akiteru #tsukishima akiteru #chubby reader #haikyuu fluff

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thebluntstudent · 9 days

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FOUR ANXOUS THOUGHTS YOU MAY BE HAVING PRE-EXAM, AND WAYS TO RATIONALISE THEM ...

Also, a little commentary about panic attacks because I been there babs, in fact was there 30 mins ago~

°•☆•°

Tomorrow, I have an exam that I have been dreading for a long time. So naturally, today when I woke up a couple hours later than I was anticipating and opened up my notes to make the most of my last day of revising, I was hit with a flood of overwhelming anxiety and a panic attack followed suit.

I was struggling to move, I felt so overtaken by my thoughts- so I lay down, hugged myself, and did my best to calm down and rationalise my thoughts. This is how I got through it, and this is how I contended with a few of the emotionally-loaded thoughts that were driving my pre-exam panic:

Firstly, getting through it. If you are having a panic attack, don't try to push it down or ignore it- it sucks babs, but much like escaping a burning building by jumping through the fire, it's happening now and the only way past it is going through. So feel it. If you can talk to someone to support you through and ground you then do, and use whatever aids you to help calm the physical effects enough that you can start to fight that negative filter making you feel like the worlds biggest failure right now- you're not. You're a human, and if you didn't care about this exam you wouldn't be curled up in bed hyperventilating about it!

°•☆•°

Just physically calming yourself down doesn't help you fight the thoughts you're having that may be caused by or be the cause of your anxiety in the first place- so here are a few anxious thoughts I have had that you may also be experiencing and the rationalisation that helped me through them- in hopes that if you aren't doing okie dokie right now that maybe this will give you something to focus on and help you be the devil's advocate to your own anxiety too:

"I woke up later than I wanted to, I've lost important study time." So you slept through your alarm, or forgot to set one- fretting about lost time is only going to make you lose your mind and lose focus more, and the day before an exam you need as much rest as the night before. A few hours may feel like a lot of time, but you probably wouldn't have made the most of that in a groggy sleep-deprived state anyway. You're looking after yourself, you still have time, and that is okay.

"I have so much to get through, I'm never going to understand everything now." There is still plenty that you can do! I have been moderately unwell for 2 months and it has had a massive impact on my capacity to study consistently. There's a fair bit of content I know that I don't have enough time to understand at a first grade level- but I still have hours to lock down a little bit more confidence in preparation for the exam. Stop thinking 'I have to do ALL of this in the next 24 hours', start thinking 'what can I do to make myself feel a little more confident for tomorrow?'- as I mentioned in my last post, in just a 5-10 minute revision session you can go over a topic's worth of content via flashcards, and you literally have hours to go yet.

"I'm a bad student, I should have started prepping weeks ago/I should have done more." Hindsight is a bitch. Even if your reason for not studying before now is simply procrastination (which does not make you a bad student, it makes you a normal student- and also, a human being), mourning the time you've lost will not get you a top grade. You still have so much time to make yourself feel a little more prepared- you aren't a bad person, and you can still do something now even if you didn't a week ago! <3

"I don't even know where I'm supposed to start now, everything feels so overwhelming." take 20. Stop envisioning your subject as a whole (easier said than done, I know), and instead try to break it down into little segments of info you have to learn- you've already been taught the subject, so you don't have to learn the WHOLE thing in 24 hours. I like to write a list breaking down my module lecture by lecture, with three little check boxes next to it (though this depends on the subject you're doing): content, flashcards, practise. Cross off anything you've already done, pick one topic- one task you want to focus on and ignore everything except for that for however long you'll be working on it. It doesn't matter if you can't get through the whole list- every little section you do is another set of questions in the exam that you now have a better chance at answering. Isn't that a win?

This won't get rid of your anxiety like some magic solution, and it isn't always an easy task to dismiss your restless mind's accusations- but hopefully this is a little helpful for any fellow messy, anxious students out there who want the best but aren't in the best circumstances to get there <3 also, good luck!

#study blog #study tips #studyblr #studyspo #study motivation #student #student tips #exams #exam season #exam stress #thebluntstudent

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studentbyday · 18 days

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week 1 / small commitments challenge

Summary: I was not focused on my challenge goals this week. I was preoccupied, thinking about the different paths I could take and weighing my options for the next couple of years. Not a bad thing, except I let the thinking invade every moment of my life I had to myself. That includes when I was supposed to be studying ochem and when I was supposed to be sleeping and when I was supposed to just be getting on with my day and doing mindless self-care stuff as quickly as possible so I can dedicate time to what's urgent. Yes, I needed to weigh my options and gather information across multiple days, but I did not have to go about it the way I did. It led to me becoming overtired and having difficulty sleeping which led to me being unable to get through my ochem goals which prevented me from doing anything else. The more tired I became as the week progressed, the worse it got. So my two new priorities for next week are: No. 1: Get enough sleep with a consistent sleep time (9pm be in bed, 10pm at the latest) and wake time (7am ideal but 8am bare minimum). Soothe yourself until you're calm enough to sleep. Like you would a baby (e.g. swaddle, massage/gentle touch, dark room, don't voluntarily subject yourself to anything stressful or overstimulating in the half hour before bed). That's how you stop and keep out of the overtired cycle. No. 2: Lots of meditation throughout the day! 5-10 mins when I wake up, minimum of 10-15 mins before bed (unless perhaps i feel less frazzled thanks to the meditation breaks which help me stay focused throughout the day? idk), and 1-2 minutes in between big tasks (those that take 2h or more) in order to reset my mind before I move onto the next task and give my brain a rest after processing lots of info on a deep level, so it can sustain that level of activity throughout the day and the rest of the week. I'm hoping that by prioritizing rest, I can succeed at my new study routine (which has also changed from last week as my priorities have changed...yet again) and work more efficiently and quickly while staying cool in mind! A chaotic breakdown of the week aka my sleep-deprived end-of-day gibberish where I try to make sense of everything that's happened lies below 😅

Monday: sleep deprived -> slow start to the day -> quite behind schedule. i listened to 1 and a half chemistry lectures, added to the notes from last week, read and annotated 1 of the 2 sets of notes i'm supposed to read this week, and answered all except 4 questions of a practice quiz on last week's material. asides from this, i did 1/3 of an Algebra 1 lesson, took a nap, and practiced driving.

Tuesday: later start than yesterday bc i wanted to get enough sleep. overall worth it, but that meant there wasn't enough time to get everything done and there were lots of distractions to field. i only did ochem and practiced driving today. i didn't even finish all the ochem i wanted to (i finished 1.5 lectures again, added to notes, started reading the second set of notes for this week, and answered 1/4 of the questions for 1 of 2 assignments for this week). i'm still trying to find a routine that works for this subiect bc it's really condensed (most weeks cover 2 lengthy modules at once 😭) and it's not a subject that's that easy to feel confident in just right off the bat...at least for me 😅 who knows, perhaps for the time being, i'll have to spend more than 4 hours on it a day until i feel confident in the fundamentals?? i also have lots to improve on in my lecture notetaking skills (i.e. trust my memory more and write down notes only AFTER i finish watching a lecture instead of attempting to write notes DURING the lecture and getting confused -> rewinding)

Wednesday: my problem this week is that i'm very distracted. still trying to figure out which path is best for me (i.e. to transfer uni or change program within my uni if that's possible...definitely probably shouldn't stick with my current program tho, that's one thing i've pretty much decided), asking around, doing my own research, trying to think of any combo of reasonable options i haven't explored yet (this is what i was doing for a lot of today). i really hate unresolved issues. they stick around in my head until it's resolved and even if i'm not actively thinking about it, i can still feel its presence in the back of my mind (and if it's big and concerning enough, it will keep bugging me at inconvenient intervals)! 😤 and this issue will stay unresolved until i have made a decision. and even then, i might still question it until enough time passes to show me that it was the right decision 😅 it's like...either i'm in "re-assess" mode aka "question every decision i have made and could make and predict to the best of my knowledge where it will lead me and do i like where it leads me?" mode (WHICH CANNOT ALL BE ANSWERED IN ONE SITTING SO HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO SCHEDULE THIS?!?! 😵‍💫😫), or "put your head down and do the work" mode wherein i'm in danger of losing sight of the bigger picture. i swing from one to the other whenever smth happens to make me realize i've stayed too long in one mode. (like in this case where i was feeling very annoyed with my current lifestyle, finally decided to say "fuck it" to my strong desire to stay within my comfort zone, and explored other options and their pros and cons which included grad school admission requirements 🤦🏻‍♀️). i'm grateful to have this many options, but today i got so overwhelmed by them and the deadlines by which i need to have made a decision and the fact that there's a lot of ochem this week to do which is more urgent but also not as existentially worrying that i decided to rid myself of the mounting anxiety with a cardio abs workout. 🥵😮‍💨😮‍💨 it worked...but now i am so pooped and don't wanna get up 😅 (update: i did get up and did a little more ochem)

Thursday: too tired to do all the ochem i wanted to (i did a little reading, a little bit of lecture watching, and finished the last 3 Qs on 1 of 2 assignments this week). i keep letting myself get overtired with my overthinking against my better judgment (like, especially after an intense workout the day before??? girl, you need to sleep!!!). anyway, i've finally pretty much decided to just switch programs at my current uni but i don't think i'll really believe i've made the decision (objectively! all on my own! using a weighted pros and cons list! 😁) until the end of this week. 😅 it will still be a more rigorous program, although not in the ways i expected (but still good!), and it will challenge me in all the right ways but i won't rack up as much expense (thank goodness! 🙏🏻) and it will be a shorter commute and i will get to spend more time with family which is just such a relief. i don't want to fall into the rat race mentality, tho sometimes i think i need to. but perhaps that's just FOMO and comparing myself against others in an unhealthy way. like, i don't actually want a rat-race/hustle culture type of life for myself if i have the option not to live one, yet i sometimes feel like i need to be a completely different person living a completely different lifestyle in order to really make it in this society...well, there are many ways to skin a cat.

Friday: ochem lab, watching another lecture, reading the ch, working on ochem assignment, and driving.

Weekend: sleepy. reset routine and family time. finishing up ochem submissions for this past week (done is better than perfect! 😤) and driving.

#studyblr #becoming that girl #but make it chaotic and more neurotic and a wip than you would think for a ''that girl''#chaotic academia #dark academia #studyspo #study motivation #study aesthetic #small commitments challenge #100dop #heydilli #astudentslifebuoy #mittonstudies #digital diary

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brwnicons · 1 year

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bro, i miss you so much🥹 but on your last posts, i decide to send a request and my apologise if i did the wrong way of sending request !!!11!!1! 🫶🏼

😡💔🫂📖 with Stede Bonnet !!11!! anyways have great day/night, sweetie (´ω`) you can do other request or ignore this!!

-🦈

☆ You sent it perfectly, thank you! I'm so sorry for stopping writing so suddenly. I abused too much of my hyperfocus states I grew so tired I couldn't write anything. However this time I'll be taking things easy and healthy! Btw I love sharks!! 🦈💛 ☆

😡💔🫂📖 + Stede Bonnet

1k followers event: Send me 3/4 emojis and a character and I'll try to write something <3

-> Resume: Stede and Reader have a fight and Lucius steps in to solve everything before either of you dumbasses throw yourselves off to the sea because it seems like you two can't be apart for more than 5 minutes. 1.8k words (~7 min)

-> Tags: GN!Reader, First Mate Reader, Stede Bonnet x reader, Blackbeard didn't arrive at the Revenge here, Angst?? It doesn't feel like it, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Lucius should be paid for his therapy service. Talk it through my ass, Mr Bonnet.

-> Warnings: None

Please tell me if you see any mistake!

The atmosphere is uncomfortable and the tension surrounding the galley could be cut with a knife. Nobody talked and everyone would slightly flinch at the sound of cluttering.

The fight you had previously had with captain Stede was heard in every bit of the ship and it had been so strange to see you both shouting at each other that everyone else were left petrified. And now? You were eating with the crew for the first time in months, with a frown on your face and handling the cutlery roughly, as if instead of stabbing some steak you were stabbing Stede.

Lunch went abnormally peacefully and without any argument and when everyone was finished you headed to were Roach was cleaning up the dishes and remains.

—Let me help you— You offered Roach as you took a plate and a sponge and started scrubbing. Roach only shrugged in response and stepped aside to give you more space.

As you were both working in silence, you were able to notice his ocasional side glances on your head and his sometimes hesitating breaths, as if he were deciding whether your situation actually was or was not none of his business. After a couple of minutes he sighed and decided to ask.

— Uh... you OK? That seemed like a pretty much intense argument. We expected you two to take out your swords and all.— He tried to brush it off with a bit of humor and a indifferent pitch but you caught that he wanted something. Maybe it was comforting you (something kind of odd knowing Roach's personality) or he was trying to get fuel for the crew's gossip. Your current mood didn't let you think of his intentions as friendly and so you glared at him and left the dishes in complete silence, leaving through the door right after.

What you didn't know was that a certain scribe had been intently watching the scene.

————

As the day progressed the deck's atmosphere began losing its previous tension and recovered its usually cheerfulness. You grabbed a broom and decided to busy yourself with some sweeping.

— Now, spit it. What the hell happened with you both before?—

You rose your head to meet Lucius' eyes next to you. He was sitting on the deck's stairs with his hands supporting his head.

— It's none of your business, Lucius— you turned to leave when you heard him stand up.

—None of- None of my business?! Dear, you've been nothing like yourself since that fight. You both never even fight!— he approached you and put his hands on your shoulders to make you look at him.

—Remeber when you helped me when Pete and I fought? About all the corny things you told me?— You looked down at the memory of asking Lucius to recall every time he and Pete cuddled or how happy he made him —Let me help you this time—.

You accepted your fate and sat down with him in the stairs, where you hugged him tightly.

— I was just worried about the raids... Last time he got hurt and I was so scared and— You could already feel the tears building up and you hid your face in your hands. You could feel Lucius' hand on your back, doing soothing circles —I don't want to lose him, Luce! He gets so carried away he forgets about taking care of himself!—

— And... That's why you told him you would left and resign as his First Mate if he didn't stop raiding without thinking? —

—Yeah...— You sniffed and wiped off your tears with the back of your hand when you felt a thin object being put on your knee. You accepted the handkerchief with a sad smile and wiped your eyes properly.

Seeing your current state, Lucius abruptly stood up and offered you his hand.

— I'll go talk with him — He had a stern look that said that his opinion couldn't be changed because the decision had been already made.

You sighed in defeat and, accepting his hand, you stood up and shook off your clothes.

— Alright... But don't be too harsh, please—

Lucius smiled at your words and gave you a few pats in the back

— Definetly you're not the same y/n that was trying to stab a piece of meat during lunch — You looked at him tiredly, he hadn't answer your question. — Alright, I promise. I won't be too harsh with him. —

You smiled and he gave you one final hug before walking towards the Captain's cabin.

————

Lucius didn't even bother to knock and bursted open the door to the cabin. Any pirate captain would response to that disrespectful behaviour with the amputation of a finger at least. Instead, captain Bonnet seemed so busy weeping and sobbing in his bed, in a nest made of blankets and cushions, that he didn't hear neither Lucius bursting the door open nor his next approach.

When he was right next to his captain blanket-cocoon and Stede was still unaware of his presence, he cleaned his throat to call for his attention.

— Uh... Captain? I need to talk to you —

Stede gave a visible and violent full body flinch at Lucius' words. He turned his head to the boy next to his bed and quickly tried to act as if he wasn't crying just a second ago, his face still all piffy and red.

— Good lords, Lucius, you startled me! —

He took off the blankets and stood up with a quick jump. — Well, what do you need? I hope it's important, boy! I'm quite busy at this moment —.

Lucius huffed and approached the sofa. He sat on one edge and patted the spot next to him. — I'm here to talk about your fight with your partner. Now, move your ass here because I'm going to set some things clear —. Lucius' tone didn't admit rejection and after hearing a loud gulp from Stede, he had his captain sitting next to him, fidgeting with the edges of his robe.

— What do you mean you want to talk about y/n...? Have you talked to them? — Stede was no longer able to hide his nervousness. Yeah, he had gotten angry because his dear y/n had threatened with leaving if he didn't take care. But, still, he loved them and thinking about them being sad because of the fight made his heart break. He hadn't wanted to get so angry.

— Yes, I've been talking to them — Lucius took a deep breath and interrupted his thoughts. — I can't believe it! — He pointed at his chest — You're the one that always presses the whole "talk it trough" on us but then, you transform into a sad dog after a misunderstanding with your partner! It's ridiculous! —

— Well, I'm aware that I certainly haven't behaved‐ —

— No! — Lucius grabbed one cushion that was laying around on the couch and shoved it into his captain's face — Look! I've got the cushion so it's my turn to talk. Now, listen to me. You have fought with someone who was worrying about your health and well-being, because you're the only one able to lead a raid after having been stabbed in your damn stomach! They take care of you, they worry about you and you get mad at them because of an obvious lie?! —

Stede felt silent. He knew he had made a mistake the moment he saw you running under the ship after that fight. He had felt horribly after and as the coward he was, the only thing he did was sleep. And drink. Both to forget that he hurt you.

Lucius dropped the pillow on Stede's knees and crossed his arms.

— You may speak now –.

— Lucius... — Stede hugged the pillow tightly. His glassy eyes didn't allow him to see Lucius clearly — I'm so sorry we fought- I don't want them to leave! I mean- not because of my mistakes. — Lucius gave a hum of approval as he inquired him to keep going. Stede sighed.

— I love them so much, Lucius. When the possibility of them leaving crossed my mind I got so scared I could only shout at them... I certainly wasn't acting rationally... I let myself get carried by the heat of the moment —

— Keep going — Stede sighed again and decided to maintain his eyes in a loose thread of the pillow instead of holding Lucius hard gaze.

— Neither shouldn't I have been so reckless. We don't need the raids at this moment in time and I understand y/n is as worried as my well-being as I am about theirs. I should have had their feelings into account. —

Lucius grinned in success and clapped excitedly.

— That's good! Yes, sir! Now, how do you feel —

— Miserable —.

— Well, lucky you! I'm sure a certain someone has been happy to hear all this lament of yours — Lucius gave Stede a light punch in his shoulder that Stede answered with a instant "ow". He turned towards the cabin door and waved.

— I know you're there, y/n. You can come out now! —

You peeked out from behind the door and the moment Stede saw you he stood up a headed towards you.

— Oh, dear... — He dropped the cushion at the sight of your glassy eyes, not caring if he was already crying, and took hold of both of your hands.

— I am so sorry, y/n. I mean it. I am so sorry I hurt you. Please, I can't bear being apart from you knowing it was me who hurt you. Please, forgive me. I- —. You cut his spiraling of guilt with a tight embrace.

— Of course I forgive you, you silly —. You pulled apart to take his face in your hands — I shouldn't have said that I would leave. You know I wouldn't, I love you —

— Oh, dear. I love you too —. He hugged you again and you could smell the vanilla scent of his hair.

— Well, then. I'll let you two lovebirds to it. No need to thank me I see! — You heard Lucius' fake offended tone but before either of you could thank him, he dissapeared behind the door.

— He's quite a mediator... —. You giggled at Stede's thoughtful expression and hugged him again.

————

That night you picked out the book for the night reading. You fell asleep quickly, leaned on Stede's side. A soft blanket covered you both and although tiredness didn't allow you to distinguish his words, you could feel the deep rumbling of his chest while he talked.

And next morning, you woke up next to him in the captain's cabin. He had his head on your chest and his arms encircled you. He snored softly as the golden light from the morning sun made his hair glow.

How could you leave?

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madegeeky · 1 year

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@rosepetalrevolution: Now I wanna know what your complaint is!

(Re: this post about The Last of Us) Major spoilers incoming, y'all.

In an absolutely ideal world, there would have been at best an ep and at the very least a significant amount of time in-between what happened at the end of 8 (When We Are in Need) and the end of 9 (Look for the Light).

I think letting the knowledge of how rabid Joel goes in defense of Ellie fade a bit into the background would have made what happened in 9 hit in a more emotional way. As it is, you see Joel lose it at the end of 8 which is memorable (as it should be) but it means that you enter into 9 with that knowledge in the forefront of your mind. 9 is only 43 mins long (the shortest ep) which means that you only have about 25 mins of show before you see Joel go rabid again.

I feel like the moment where Joel just turns into a murder machine would have had more emotional impact if there was a beat where the viewer was like "Oh shit, what is Joel going to do....... OH SHIT". Because I feel like that's a little bit what it's like in Joel's head. I think, in these situations, he's fine until something in him just snaps and I think that having the player have that moment of knowledge also snap into place would be a great way to get the viewer into a really similar head space.

So, when I went to go try to figure out where we could have put ep 8, instead of right in front of 9, I come up with the problem that there just isn't anywhere else to put it.

7 has to come before 8 because I think putting Elli's flashback in the midst of Joel being hurt is perfect. The eps where Joel goes on a rampage can't take place before the end of 6, where Joel finally admits that he cares for Ellie. Ellie wouldn't have been able to push Joel into admitting this and I don't think Joel could have been pushed into without what happened in 4 and 5. I think 3 is important to giving us an emotional connection to people outside of Ellie and Joel, which has to be done early so as to not feel like it gets in the way of the story, as well as being a quick and dirty way to increase how much we like Joel. And 3 can't come any earlier because we need to have established Joel, Tess, and Ellie as characters before spending so much time on someone other than them. And everything that happens in 1 and 2 are things that have to happen in the first two eps of the show and now we're all the way at the beginning of the series and there's just nowhere else to put what happens in 8. And the story is way too tight for me to even consider putting a whole new ep with all new stuff in it in-between 8 and 9.

It's a minor complaint and I almost love the show all the more for giving me a minor complaint and then having the writing be so good that I just have throw my hands up in the air and say "Fine! Fine! You literally did it the best you could! I literally have no notes for you! Fine!"

#spoilers for doc #geeky talks #geeky talks tv

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whentherewerebicycles · 11 months

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here is a scruffy little angel! ok I feel pretty fragile inside from a week of bad sleep & an especially terrible insomnia experience last night but I am trying to be brave about it. two of my grad school friends I haven’t seen in forever are in town this weekend and I am v excited about that!!! I always get weird homebody inertia around social stuff but then I have a great time (like last night I really dragged my feet on hanging out with M&A in the park/getting dinner after and then it was so much fun) so I just have to commit to stuff even if I feel like socially hibernating. when it comes to most social things my instincts are not a reliable guide to what will actually make me happy. so tonight I will meet up with them for dinner/drinks and then tomorrow we will hang out at the lake.

here are some things I’d like to do with the day:

finish young mungo which is absolutely gutting ughhh so painful but so good. I kind of want to put up my hammock and read somewhere without distractions but can’t decide if it’s too much effort. mm tbd.

work on writing meme prompts (this has been v good for me it’s forcing me to dig into scene writing/revision which for whatever reason is the thing I’ve built up the most writer’s block anxiety around)

the house is a tip right now it’s not dirty really just super untidy and the clutter is making me feel on edge. I think I need to do a few song-timed bursts of putting stuff in its proper place and ugh I might actually start with that so my brain feels calmer about other stuff

fold laundry

long walk with dogs because I didn’t walk them at all yesterday… I can tell I am avoiding walks partly because it’s a bit hotter out and partly because I’m getting Walk Boredom with our usual route. I think I’ll drive them to the slightly farther-out forest (4 min instead of 2 min haha) because it’ll be cooler and kinda interesting/new. also if I’m feeling really motivated I could do a very short run after I drop them off at home—I’m talking like, 3 min run / 3 min walk times 3 short haha. gotta ease back into it somehow.

pick something to wear well in advance of leaving. otherwise I will get so stressed later on and will end up running way later than I mean to & being way more amped up when I leave. why are clothes so stressful to me literally no one cares and I feel like people care even less in this city than anywhere else I’ve ever lived lol

shower around 3:30/4 so I can be ready to leave between 5-6ish

mm okay that all seems good. I think now it’s time to get up and do my first burst of song cleaning… maybe I will do all too well 10 min version + I can see you.

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agentnico · 4 months

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Orion and the Dark (2024) review

Woah, Jacob Tremblay under went some plastic surgery or something, as he looks mega-different! Was watching an interview with him and Paul Walter Hauser talking about this film, and the kid has hit puberty big time. Now looks like an annoying moody teen. If they reboot Twilight, we’ve found Edward.

Plot: The thing Orion fears the most is the dark. When the embodiment of his worst fear pays a visit, Dark whisks Orion away on a roller-coaster ride around the world to prove there is nothing to be afraid of at night.

What starts as a pretty basic by-the-numbers animated film about how every aspect of life can be scary quickly morphs into something that celebrates the unpredictability of it whilst exploring how balance is essential. The main kid Orion - he’s basically Beau Is Afraid for kids. He gets freaked out by everything, and honestly he was just really sad to watch, and Tremblay is almost too good at portraying the character’s inner fear, making me wonder how much of the real Tremblay is present within Orion. We are treated to an amusing scrapbook montage of Orion’s imagined worst case scenarios, after which the film briskly jumps straight into the nightly events where Dark comes knocking, featuring a delightfully narrated introduction by Werner Herzog. Paul Walter Hauser makes Dark so loveable, turning a concept that is scary for some into a gentle giant with his own doubts and insecurities. The interactions between Orion and Dark are entertaining and amusing, if a bit inconsistent, as every time you think they’re becoming friends, Orion goes back to his fears. It’s all easy digestible family friendly entertainment, even if there were a couple of surprisingly dark, pardon the pun, jokes included throughout.

However it is in the last 20 minutes when the movie does a mad 360 degree turn and switches genres into this crazy multi-generational escapade, as such in the last 10 mins me and my fiancée were questioning momentarily what just happened. Look, as a collective package Orion and the Dark is a basic animation that takes a lot from other movies of its kind, but those last moments or so jarringly mad and out-there that we were shook. That is until I saw who has a screenplay credit and then all made sense. That’s right, one of the writers of this film is Charlie Kaufman. As you may know, Charlie Kaufman’s films scratch at your head and mess with your mind, as his writing fundamentally deconstructs the ways in which it plays with and incorporates narrative structure of the story itself. In a nutshell, his films are surreal and weird, hence why Orion and the Dark’s ending makes all the more sense.

The animation style itself is fun, somewhat similar to Mitchell vs the Machines’ 2D to 3D blend, and a pleasing colour palette with the dark blue and purple environments, however you can tell this is a cheaper budget from DreamWorks, as many times the backgrounds looked too plain and simple, and even the character designs of the nightly entities were not that original or creative. In fact aside from Dark, all the other night sprits were really bland and unmemorable, and one of them was voiced by acting legend Angela Bassett, so that’s saying something.

Overall Orion and the Dark is enjoyable for what it is, but doesn’t really make a strong impression aside from its last mind-bending 10 minutes, and knowing now of Kaufman’s involvement I feel like this movie had the potential of going weirder from the start, but instead is really by-the-numbers and forgettable, and will not be seen as the cure to nyctophobia.

Overall score: 5/10

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liennalei · 2 years

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What ruins the RTC revival

So i’ve been brainrotting over RTC these last weeks and. watched both bootlegs. while the original holds a dear place in my heart, the revival simply isnt as good. So Im going to rewatch it and write down the reasons why.

DISCLAIMER: LONG POST

AN: please watch the show before reading this. it wont make sense otherwise.

Also. R! is used to talk about the revival character. Likewise, O! is used to talk about the original character. Cause holy shit they are completely different characters.

1. Humanoid Karnak. i refuse to elaborate.

2. “Virgil shall play— the bass”. I loved that delivery, and now it’s gone

3. When explaining the rules about the armrest, Karnak goes a bit too fast, which ruins the comedy for me

4. “I assure you, none of the calls you are about to receive will have life altering consequences (pause. looks down) except for one of you”. THE PAUSE IS GONE. THE PAUSE WAS WHAT MADE IT FUNNY.

5. THE CHOIR FACES THE PUBLIC.

I will elaborate. In the original version, the choir is on the other side of the stage, facing backwards, and only face the public when dead. This helps establish that the stage is the afterlife. THIS VERSION DOESNT DO THAT.

6. R!Mischa looks old. The entire cast looks old, but R!Mischa looks like a 40 year old. Thats a grown ass man sir.

7. No Penny foreshadowing in the newspaper.

8. The segment of "something doesnt feel quite right–" is gone. I loved that segment. I feel its fundamental to introducing us to the characters.

9. No friendly banter between Ocean and Noel during the song :(

10. RICKY ISNT SUPPOSED TO SING YET. Even if hes already dead, the others arent supposed to know he can already talk.

11. On the subject of R!Ricky. The crutches are gone. What the fuck. I know why but i hate why.

12. R!Ocean is the one asking "where are we?". And its not scared, its not confused, its just... a question. O!Constance's delivery is far better.

13.

DEMOCRACY ROCKS!

I hate this delivery. R!Ocean's "Democracy rocks!" was perfect: preppy, upbeat... this singy-songy democracy rocks sucks. O!Ocean wouldve never.

14. I hate R!Ocean. I refuse to elaborate.

Sike! I will. She's doesnt look the "overachiever golden girl" part. I dont mean her looks, i mean her attitude– she seems normal. She seems like a normal girl, shes not even half as annoying! Thats what made O!Ocean great– her being annoying yet lovable!

15. Mischa doesnt grab his crotch :(

Okay i must elaborate. The crotch grabbing may seem weird but its part of the gangsta persona. The psoture this Mischa adopts is simply... not it.

16. That was emasculating...

After the "i am naked child in the wilderness" introduction, O!Mischa says "that was whack". Not emasculating. Hes surprised that hes said that, but he doesnt say that it doesnt represent him. He knows he is vulnerable, and he embraces it. R!Mischa seems embarrassed of this side of him. WHICH IS NOT MY DEAR MISCHA.

17. Instead of giving the discourse, Ricky simply says "Level up". There is no character.

18. On the topic. The choir realises he can speak only now. There is no "The twilight zone" moment, no "It certainly appears that way. Badass" moment. Fuck this.

Sidenote: we're at the 13 min mark

19. R!Jane Doe is less autistic coded. Shes just creepy. Inherently bad.

20. "Playing games where people"s lives are on the table is

Super illegal"

This delivery makes no sense. Why would she say it like that. Why would she move her hips alongside that line.

21. This monologue's delivery is shit. It reads like a comedic monologue, and not a "debate team" monologue.

22. The improv thing. Why would you add that. I mean i know why but why.

23. "IT TAKES TWO WINGS TO FLY–" R!Ocean is a theatre kid in the bad way. O!Ocean was a debate team kid. O!Ocean was better and more in line with the character

24. Instead of singing the "Oh nooOOOooO" she says "Nope. Nope." Why. Oh, I know why!

25. This Ocean can't sing. Im sorry. No offence, but this actress isn't fit for this role. Her voice doesnt adjust to Ocean's registry.

26. Instead of the euphoric "WHAT A RUSH" we get a full of soberbia "What a rush~". R!Ocean is meaner.

I have to note R!Constance is one of the few good things in here. Her delivery is great and her dialogue is good.

27. "And then i got to get on that ride. Thanks" got replaced with a line that makes Ricky seem like an incel

Okay i know that ricky IS horny but hes NOT an incel. "No one wants to make out with the tambourine guy". O!Ricky wouldnt complain about that. He complained about riding the cyclone and DYING.

28. Instead of trying to get a hug, Jane tries to offer up her doll. I just loved that part :( it gives her character.

R!Noel is also good. Not as good as O!Noel, but good. The nativity scene is awkward, but it fits. So im not counting that.

And the transition from Noel to Monique is amazing.

29. But, as much as I like this Noel's acting... the singing is mediocre. It sounds like a karaoke performance. It looks like a karaoke performance. It feels like a karaoke performance.

Its been half an hour. I need help.

31. The dance during "THAT FUCKED UP GIIIIIIIIIIRL" changes and its worse.

32. Again, I hate R!Ocean

33. Every Story's Got a Lesson. Again, she cant sing.

34. The porno bit is gone. It gave Ricky some depth.

35. The Saw V bit is gone too. It was so funny :(

36. The improv thing..... sucks. Constance lets to, and she is supposed to be the restrained girl until her song. It breaks the character. It ruins the surprise.

37. The transition to Mischa's turn is rough as fuck

38. Mischa's backstory here makes him seem like an asshole. The original was this sad story, this one is just angry. Its reductive.

39. He says "Mostly positive feedback" as a bad thing, says it /neg. Doubting. O!Mischa was amazed, loving, said it /pos.

40. It was HILARIOUS when he said "Good for hot dog (raises index, as in "1"), but not so good for Ukraine (raises middle finger too, as in "2") so THANK YOU FOR KILLING MY MOTHER (leaves middle finger up)". GUESS WHAT. THATS GONE AS WELL.

41. The pause before "Autotune will never die" is gone too

42. To put it simply, R!Mischa didnt slay. O!Mischa slayed.

43. Why does Ricky have a box in his head. What the fuck. I know why but why.

44. It takes too fucking long for Mischa to get his. Uh. Thingy around the waist (fajín in spanish).

45. The Talia projection on the sheet/skirts is bad. Im sorry. Its just bad. Not as creative, not as perfectly-timed...

46. I miss the bit where Talia appears in Mischa's chest. As if it were his heart. It was so emotional yo

47. The dubstep part is not as good. I loved the circle with the fortnite dance.

48. Mischa is off tune by the end of the song

49. THE PART WHERE OCEAN IS SPED UP IS GONE.

50. The transition to Ricky is shit. Its just "yo why dont you go next"

51. R!Ricky not smooth. Ocean is weak to her knees for no reason.

52. The backstory changes for no reason???? Hes not disabled he just wont speak????? There truly was no need.

I'll admit it: this man Can Dance

53. UNDERWEAR JUMPSCARE. WHAT THE FUCK.

54. R!Ricky is less autistic coded. Hes just WEIRD. Inherently bad.

55. The space jesus line is delivered badly

56. R!Jane Doe doesnt fly.

Thats my only complaint, and its justifiable. R!Jane Doe is one of the few things done right here.

57. The New Birthday Song is less awkward in the beginning. Less like theyre making it up on the spot and more like they all knew it already.

58. I just realised the bit of LOVE CONQUERS ALL IS GONE.

59. Retroactively, NO PART OF "DO YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT WOULDVE HAPPENED IF TALIA AND MISCHA HAD MET?" . That was so poetic,,,,,, and now its gone,,,,,,

60. Ocean's breakdown isnt much of a breakdown.

R!Constance. Wow. I love her. She is the only other good thing in here.

61. I HATE R!Ocean

62. R!Ocean doesnt elaborate on why it shouldnt be her. She isnt self aware as the original.

63. The final montage doesnt show us her entire life. Sure, it shows her POV, but theres no old Penny.

64. Karnak breaks and talks normally afterwards.

65. They dont smile profoundly as they disappear. Thats the saddest change.

My final thoughts

It is a great show. This is not a decent show. Most of the songs sound off, except for Sugar Cloud and The Ballad of Jane Doe, and the acting is mediocre at best.

Maybe it’s not as bad. Maybe the original is so good that it simply can’t measure up to it.

Heck, maybe i’m conditioned after having watched it thousands of times. Hate and love are two sides of the same coin: perhaps, had i not loved the original so much, i wouldn’t have hated this rendition as profusely.

Regardless, I did not like the Blue Bridge version.

Your lucky number is 7. Be sure to Ride the Cyclone.

#rtc #ride the cyclone #karnak #ocean o'connell rosenberg #constance blackwood #mischa bachinski #noel gruber #ricky potts #rant #Im sorry for the long post but i simply love this show too much #rtc fans you shall be fed today

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amplifyme · 1 year

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I'm on the "keep the miracle pregnancy" side-- but C'MON CC. You had all of S7 to lead up to his finale, admitted the whole crew/actors knew it was leading up to Requiem's twist, had Amor Fati spaceship (and possibly En Ami chip), so much time and build up you could have done aaaaaand no. You literally threw up your hands, gave us a post-humous IVF timeline that can't fit in S7, gave no explanation for Scully's pregnancy and had everyone dancing around it. 1/2

The best moments of S8 were Doggett and Skinner friend bits and MSR (of course)-- and the MSR was only as good as it got because DD had his micro-expressions and most of Empedocles was add-libbed (even in the scripts it said something along the lines of "they'll know what to do here" or "they do something in this scene.") I HATE Essence/Existence. If I feel all soft and snuggly, I'll cue up Essence's monologue, some of Mulder/Doggett, the babyshower, and SKIP to the last 5 min of Existence. 2/2

The polite person in me wants to say "sorry for the rant" but the petty side of me says "direct all annoyance at CC, he started this." And that's another thing! CC has every right to torpedo his own series; and I'm pretty hands off and will just say "that's not canon", dust my hands off, and move on. But to then turn and point the finger at fans, who were invested (and continue to be in part) in his work and blame them? Wild. ANyWaY, thanks for letting me rant~. ;DDD 3/2

Hey, I’m always up for a good rant myself! 🤣

I’ll support your support for a miracle pregnancy, even though just the thought of it makes me break out out in hives. I’m a believer in live and let live, and the idea that there is no right or wrong way to be a fan. Having said all that...

To put it bluntly, Chris Carter shit the bed when it came to pretty much anything post-Je Souhaite. There are certain moments in what came after that I enjoy, but I can only do that if I’m able to view them as AU, something completely separate from the series I came to know and love. And it’s not just that I object to the mangled storylines and characterizations, or the blatant retconning he had to do to untangle the mess he himself created. It’s that’s so much (IMHO) of what I loved about the series and these remarkable characters wasn’t there anymore. Everything was dumbed down and simplified and painfully pedestrian. I didn’t recognize anyone anymore. Frankly, I didn’t care to.

You’re correct that CC had every right to torpedo his own series. But here’s the thing: you’ll never convince me that he will ever consider the notion that he’s the one responsible for its steep decline. I think he still believes that everything he touches is golden and he makes no mistakes. Now most of us, if we’re self-aware enough, learn from our mistakes and alter our behavior going forward to integrate those lessons learned and at least try to do better the next time. Instead of doing that, CC gave us IWTB and the My Struggle episodes in the revival. Not just one or two, but four of them, each more badly written and nonsensical than the last. And he still thinks they’re masterpieces of film making and writing. But I guess if you’ve been fed a steady diet of ego-stroking and consume only positive press over a few decades, it becomes difficult to pull your head out of your ass and take a good look around.

As an aside, I took on the challenge, this new year, to finally watch S9, none of which I’ve seen - with the exception of The Truth. I made it as far as Mulder taking a shower in his black boxers and Scully’s, “He’s gone. He’s just gone,” explanation before I bowed out. I can’t do it. I just can’t. More power to everyone out there who enjoys what came after S7. I wish I could see what y’all do, but I can’t. Neither my eyes or my heart are up for the task.

#ask and answer #xfiles #amp rants #love the great kahuna for giving us mulder and scully #but will never forgive him for what he did to them #they deserved so much better

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howuart · 2 years

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HELLO IT IS ME DOUBLE LIFE ANON BACK AFTER LIKE A WEEK OF DISSAPPEARANCE. I AM SORRY FOR BEING GONE FOR SO LONG BUT I COME BEARING HEADCANONS.

also, sorry for getting third life and last life mixed around! AND for forgetting about the boogeyman in L.L. that's like one of the coolest/most important things about it and i just straight up forgot lol :,). shoutouts to that one person in the notes section of my first ask for correcting me!!

ANYWAYS, onto some ideas i had for the soulbound au (im kinda smushing together Third Life, Last Life, and Double Life for a super fun funky experience) im only really gonna be talking about nya & zane, kai & pixal, and lloyd & morro bc those the only soulbounds of which you are 100% sure of

edit: quick interjection as im like 40 mins into writing this to say idrk how far you are in the show, but theres some s8 spoilers in the latter half of the kai and pixal section, so please be careful of that!!

• i think that whenever you're in the presence of your soul bound, just know somethings up. its like a weird feeling you have. and whenever you see them or they see you, you both realize 'oh hey were bound arent we? cool!'

• ^ or not cool depending on your opinion of your sb (looks at morro and lloyd)

anyways, nya and zane!!

• i think these two had a really funny first meeting. the ninja obviously first met nya when they were rescuing her, and i cant help but laugh at the idea of nya brushing right past her brother and the guy who obviously wants to hit on her to go talk to the quiet guy whos just looking at her, amazed.

• they obviously told the others what was happening like 5 seconds later, but those were a VERY confusing 5 seconds. especially for kai

• they are (to me, at least) the perfect definition of a platonic soulbound. i feel like interviewers would go up to nya and be like

• "so we've heard that you're soulbound to one of the other ninja! just between you and me, is it jay or cole? or is it a familial bond with kai?" and NO ONE believes her when she says its zane. IF she even tells them. she might not even answer those kinda questions tbh

• whenever zane dies every other season, she knows he's not REALLY dead. wouldn't she be dead then, too?

• i feel like that adds a whole other layer to Zanes season 3 sacrifice, cause he'd know he'd be taking nya down with him, yet i am FAR too mentally unstable over the thought of that to get into it <3<3

okay, kai and pix time!!

• start-of-season-3-kai, who just finished reprimanding a 6 year old for shoving gum up their nose, seeing this techy nindroid walk out and suddenly Getting It: O h

• instead of zane being pixals sentience-awakening, i believe her seeing kai for the first time would shake her.

• Pixal, upon realizing her soulbound is the elemental master of fire: THAT'S WHY I OVERHEAT ALL THE TIME???

• as for their dynamic. c'mon. we saw how they were in the car scene. kai is unhinged and pixal has him on a child leash

• HOWEVER Kai has proven to be very smart multiple times in the show, and pix would 100% go to him to ask questions she doesn't under the solution to. most of the time he doesn't know either, but be occasionally does!

• their dynamic (again, to me personally) could either be platonic or romantic? kai is the typa guy to just casually flirt with his friends, and as we saw from that one s8 scene with Pixal and lloyd, pix sometimes does that, too!

• overall i think these two would be very healthy and kai would be ECSTATIC when pix gets her body back as samuri x. 100% would hug the life out of her

okay. fluff over. now onto the disaster that is lloyd and morro as soulbounds

• when lloyd first walked into the muesuem and saw the (possessed) nightguard, he knew something was.. off.

• he didn't get that floaty feeling that the others described when they found their soulbound, but he did feel. something.

• morro felt the exact same thing, but he refused to acknowledge it. why would he? the thought of him and Lloyd, the Green Ninja, being soulbound is so preposterous that it's almost funny

• then, whenever morro jumps out of the nightguards body, there's a horrifying moment where he realizes what's going on

• lloyd, not knowing the extent of Morro's villainy, is super excited!! he found him, his soulbound! the person that'll be by his side through it all!! yeah, he's a ghost, so that's a little weird, but who cares? he found him!!

• then possession happens. then the the rest of the season happens.

• a remorseful and tentatively redeemed morro, knowing that if he lets himself drown he'll kill lloyd in the process, ruefully takes his masters hand

• he's around. he's not really a part of the group. he's just there to make sure he's not why lloyd suddenly dies

• morro'd 100% protect lloyd if he was ever in a life or death situation. he'd say he did it to protect himself, but that's a lie

• after Lloyd processed everything that morro put him through, he might try to reach out? like it or not, and trust me; they both HATE IT, they're soulbound

• would take a long, painstaking, heartwrenching journey, but they might be able to be proper soulbounds. after a long, long time

• maybe.

• ...they're 1000% a power duo tho. working together, they could kick your ass blindfolded while bound and gagged to a chair

OKAY THAT'S ALL I HAVE FOR NOW. well. this is all im putting down for now. ive been writing this 4 like an hour and am terrified of tumblr crashing mid-submisson, but i have more (general) headcanons if you'd like to hear them :)

Don't worry about spoilers I know everything, well except crystalized I don't want to be spoiled for that. And also HI! I missed you anon!

yeah like first you see them and it's just like sparkles all around and then eye contact and you rush at each other and just start chatting! Like for Nya and Zane nya just jumps off the Dragon while Kai's about to explain his plan and she just goes to the and they both yell 'YOU!' with so much excitement that it just confuses Kai. Jay's just heart broken she likes Zane??? like he loves zane and all but zane?? really. and then they're just like this is my soul bound!! and Kai's super happy for his sis but he's like 'sis gtg save wu common have fun soon' and Jay's happy he's still got a chance! plus Zane's helping him.

yeah Nya doesn't give the interviewers much ground just like 'yeah the rumors are true but like I"m telling you who' and just leaves it at that.

Yeah Every time Zane dies she just like no he's still here, I have a few sketch Ideas I'll get to soon. and season 4 is different cause they know he's alive so while they hold a memorial for the people but they also promise to find him.

So the beginning of season 4 lloyd's still gonna get them all but they're all looking for Zane and Kai's looking for both Zane and Pixal cause he know's something happened to her but hasn't gotten to telling the others yet, been busy looking for them.

So lloyd gets everyone cause he got a lead, Chen's invitation. And he shows them told to only tell the other elemental masters. Garmadon still figures out though.

And the rest of the season is mostly the same but when they find Zane Kai's like 'pix??" Cause he can feel her even though she's not quite there, no body and all.

Nya ATTACKS Zane when they see each other during the fight, and freaks when he goes missing not long later, 'I just got that idiot back!" Kai's also worried about PIxal but less cause 'she's smart she knows her limits... I hope'

And I just realized both Smith's are gonna be with Zane a lot since pix is in him so they are just a trio (quartet) you see together a lot.

Right! like Kai even right after zane's staring at her cause he got stuck in the door lol just pushes him and like zane and Nya just kinda yells "You!?" and pix stares back in shock like I'm a robot I dont' get a soul bound right???

And they chat for a bit and then they split cause she's busy and Kai has to go see borg, they promise to talk when they get back.

Zane's probably a bit jealous at this.

And when she's evil kai doesn't like it and Jay and cole have to drag BOTH Kai and Zane.

Not sure if I want Zane to be outside with the technoblades or kai. ughs decisions decisions.

And when Pixal is out fighting the ninjdroid army it's both Kai and Zane out there, It takes them longer to figure out how to break the glass cause kai's smart and the others aren't. as smart or good on their feet. Jay and Cole aren't gonna figure it out. rip them.

They still get the power off though

xD Zane has to deal with pix being hot a lot but it's ok cause he's ice still bothersome though.

OH! But with Zane and Pix sharing a heart the Smith sibs are also connected now!! And when she's in him, it's faint but the two(smiths) defiantly feel it.

Yeah I don't know if I want Pixane or Hotwire in this au. ugh hard choices.

Yup hug zane hug Kai<3

Yeah I just imagine Morro throws the Realm crystal and grabs at Wu's hand. Not gonna die today!

Yeah I was thinking Morro went to the monastery and saw it burned down, he's upset I mean that was his home. so he starts to rebuild it, somewhat not too sure how to do that.

But then Lloyd's the leader and doesn't know what to do he's trying but he's still a kids. So morro tentatively offers advice sometimes the two being on better grounds since morro helped cole and the two are both human now. Cole and morro are working on the waterphobia. so bonding with lloyd's brothers

Morro helping with his knowledge on ghosts during day of the departed helped him get more into the group (he doesn't like this though and prefers to stay back when they go on missions. but he's around got to make sure lloyd doesn't die.)

And Morro really wants to find his dad. he's with Nya and Lloyd.

And then lloyd has a crush. oh but I need to rewatch that season before I talk about it cause I forgot a lot of stuff. so I'll get to that later.

Yeah! I'd love to hear more headcanon! I love making this little au with you! you're sparking lots of Ideas in me<3

And I was also trying to pair up the other's and thought what about Echo and Jay? and it hasn't left so do with that what you will.

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ckneal · 1 year

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Hey! Thanks for the tag, @nalivaa! I'm so sorry it took me so long to get around to this. Things have been so busy lately.

Three ships: Am I allowed to count midam and midamoul as one? I feel like every midam concept that comes to me these days has an optional midamoul add-in. The line is like an illusion that only exists in some lights--every fic idea has a parallel ghoul version! None are safe! Meanwhile, when I have time to read lately, I've mostly been reading WangXian fics, so that should probably be my second ship. And then for my third. . .You know the book Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea by Jules Verne? I just finished it the other day, and the whole time that I was reading it, I just kept getting the feeling that Captain Nemo very clearly has a crush on Pierre Aronnax. Right up until the last chapter or so, it just seemed like some sort of Beauty-and-the-Beast-Under-the-Sea stuff was happening. So much so, that I actually started writing out a concept for a midam/midmaoul parody of the story on more than one occasion, but never got around to posting it.

First ever ship: Oh man, I guess Spuffy? Spike and Buffy from Buffy the Vampire Slayer? I wasn't producing content for it or involved in the fandom or anything, I just watched the show and wanted these two characters to get together. Which is what shipping is in my mind.

Last song: "Sweet but Psycho" by Ava Max. The line "her people say run don't walk away" makes me think of Joon-Woo from Vincenzo, and it's been stuck in my head for weeks. Currently reading: Well, I just finished Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea by Jules Verne, and I'm about to start reading the novelization of the Doctor Who 50th anniversary special, which I've heard really good things about.

Currently consuming: Officially, I'm watching The Owl House right now. But, I've had so much on my plate lately that I haven't really been able to watch more than an episode of it. Instead, I've been watching 1 min long youtube videos of this adorable woman who makes her husband bento lunches every day, because they're so sweet and the lunches are so pretty, and I can usually force myself back to work after watching about 5-10 of them in a row.

Currently craving: Not to dwell on my stress levels too much, but some down time would be amazing. I miss working on things for fun so much. (Though, you know, I would settle for an adorable bento box lunch.)

It’s been a little while since I was tagged in this, so I feel a little awkward tagging anyone else, not knowing who’s already done it. If anyone sees this and wants to fill this out though, please consider yourself tagged!

#ask game

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gillianthecat · 2 years

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The Devil Judge: Episode 16

I just finished The Devil Judge and something about this show compelled me to take copious notes - it had emotional intensity and layers of mystery. These are long and rambling, so they're likely not of interest to anyone else, but since I spent all that time writing it I decided, why not post it. Perhaps someone will find it interesting.

Below are my moment-to-moment reactions, predictions and analysis as I watched episode 16.

eps 1&2 ep3 ep4 ep5 ep6 ep7 ep8 ep9 ep10 ep11 ep12 ep13 ep14 ep15 ep16

I wrote about my initial impressions, up to episode 5, here and here.

This is cleaned up only slightly. I followed the spelling given in the Viki subtitles. I mostly don't explain what I'm reacting to, so this will probably only make sense if you've seen the episode recently. Occasionally I give timestamps.

ok. here we go. deep breaths

oh god my heart. these two. their faces.

oh god. is one of them going to die? "even if it costs me my life." do they have to bury the gays even when they won't admit they're gay? It is still hard for me to imagine what a happy ending could even look like here, even if they were allowed to be in love.

Ga-On now has no power, he has to beg a low level police officer to intervene, just like an ordinary citizen.

Is he going to end up in jail too? or maybe he's trying to get himself arrested so he can bust Yo-Han out from the inside?

starting to feel like a rat trapped in a maze. what doesn't Seon-Ah control at this point? I hope she doesn't get flattened out into just a conspiracy mastermind at this point.

I'm confused about the timeline here. I thought Prof. Min had been a supreme court justice for a while now? and it seems he'd known Seon-Ah for many years. How long ago did Ga-On become a judge? Based on my research I'm guessing any time from age 24 on, and now he's 30, so it's been 5 or 6 years?

but now it's looking like she only tried to rope Prof Min into her plot when Yo-Han began planning the public trials. Which is just within the past year or maybe two?

(8:15) either way, it's looking like Prof. Min truly is a moral person who got tricked by Seon-Ah because he wanted to stop the televised trials, which seemed dangerous to him (same, dude). My first reaction is that he's pretty naive, but he doesn't see the same Seon-Ah that we get to, so perhaps she's just that good at fooling people.

They're having it both ways: he was conspiring with the enemy AND he's a moral center in this universe. Surprisingly that actually works for me.

"Whatever it takes" a theme of this show - everyone has made this promise and then asked if it was worth it

I'm predicting she's misjudging him here. i still believe he's one of the few not motivated by personal ambition. he has no interest in being chief justice, he's interested in right and wrong

"Someone had to become a monster to stop Kang Yo-Han" With Prof. Min's face sideways reflected in the table! I think this is the first time they use the reflection framing for him? now that we know he's also participating in the games of power.

Ga-On. You're just careening around this world like a pinball now. You lost Su-Hyeon, then you thought Yo-Han had betrayed you, then as soon as you found out he hadn't, he was sent to jail and you discovered your mentor, your moral center had betrayed you instead. I feel like you must not even know which way is up anymore.

he's a reactive character - that's his role in this narrative, but they make it work so he doesn't feel passive or stupid or without agency

oh god, the bandage on the hand. the framing continues to emphasize the intensity of Y & G's connection.

(14:05) Seon-Ah's in pink again as she enters the den of power. Pink because she's feeling safe and in control? and the first time we've seen her in pants and not a short skirt? I feel like she's dressing more for herself now because she feels secure enough in her power.

Cigars again. Last time we saw a cigar someone died. a servile president Heo. He's in the fall part of his rise and fall. This actor is great - the role could easily feel like a caricature, but he somehow manages to make him seem like a plausible human being.

Our Two Representative Businessmen are acting more and more like cackling hyenas. hmm, interesting theory that Seon-Ah has here.

oh yeah, i keep forgetting about this Dream Village plot. I think it's because it's never really felt like it's the reason why Yo-Han is battling these guys? the show is either still keeping his motivations mysterious, or is just confused about them.

Ah, the wives! I was just thinking we hadn't seen them in a while. I hope they're going to be doing their own plotting.

oh god, this is creepy. This is getting very dystopian.

Ga-On's note to Elijah. It's so sweet that he wants to comfort and reassure her. and yet it's just reminding me I'm pissed that this plot twist doesn't make sense. and is a confusing explanation of Yo-Han's behavior

brave boy, preparing to go into the dragon's cave to rescue his prince. He's lost all his protectors and now he has to become the schemer and protector.

I keep thinking about Yo-Han's motivation. They haven't yet sufficiently connected the dots between 'wants to protect Elijah from the guilt of killing her parents' and 'devotes his whole life to a complicated plot to take down the shadow government, committing many immoral acts along the way.' Like, he was always an outsider, and an adrenaline junkie, and walked the line of becoming the monster that everyone thought he was. He was always an ends justifies the means person. I guess I'm struggling because the big church fire reveal was framed as giving us the key insight into Yo-Han's personality and motivations. but it was just a small detail, really. most of what explains his behavior either we already knew or they haven't told us yet.

Is he devoted solely to the few people he loves, and let the world burn? He's literally said this before. and a lot of his actions support it. but his complex plotting seems only to make sense if he cares about humanity at large, or about an abstract idea of justice. If the foundation isn't responsible for the fire, than revenge can't be the reason he's going after them. and i believe that he's not interested in personal power for his own sake, he's not like Seon-Ah. or in money or fame like the Two Representative Businessmen and Prez. Heo. The only other explanation he's stated (although it's always been ambiguous if we should trust this) is that he cares about humanity and justice. which is literally the opposite of "let the world burn"

So. Is there going to be another reveal that the foundation was somehow to blame for the fire? Or does Yo-Han blame them because the only reason they were at the church was because they tricked Isaac into a donation? It's a tenuous connection to motivate a 10 year revenge plot, but I could believe it fit's Yo-Han's character. He apparently killed that firefighter just for stealing a watch off Isaac's dead body. But the problem is he hasn't said this, and he's explained a lot of reasoning by now. and it's so slight a connection it needs to be overtly explained for me to buy that's the reason.

maybe it's a structural issue? I think they're trying to tell two different stories - an intimate domestic story and a sprawling political story, and Yo-Han is the connection point between the two. but the two stories have different requirements for the character's motivations, and the writers haven't fully integrated those contradictory demands. I think it's theoretically possible to make it work, but very challenging

But, patience. I'm sure they'll tell us more, and there's a chance it will even make all these contradictions make sense.

life in prison. People from Yo-Han's past are trying to come back and haunt him now that he isn't protected. I'm not worried though. even if he dies it won't be at the hand of these bit players.

(24:30) ok. adventure heist time. Ga-On has smuggled himself into the medical center in a box. what horrors await us?

i don't' know if it's intentional, but all this plastic sheeting is evoking the false mansion that Seon-Ah built for the kidnapping

well, this is disturbing. I'm guessing it's all vibes, and there's no logical medical/research explanation for what we see, but the vibes are effective.

perfect timing on the espionage Ga-On! almost like you were the protagonist of a movie

WOW this is an interesting choice in the middle of a real life pandemic where people aren't trusting vaccines. (apparently vaccine conspirecy theoreies are not a major problem in South Korea, but still)

https://www.mdpi.com/1660-4601/19/16/9914/pdf?version=1660218026 (opens a PDF)

Ga-On put your cap back on! These people know what you look like! I can't see how he's filming, but presumably he is.

(min 29) somehow this cartoonishly evil conversation works. It seems like it should feel over the top, but i guess i believe in the evil of billionaires, and their honesty amongst themselves.

laughter, music and slowmo, echoing that first dinner party he attended with these hyenas

they're definitely making it seem like the Two Representative Businessmen are holding the cards here.

gasp! I jumped. but yay allies! Ga-On, I hope you're filming everything.

Seon-Ah looks genuinely shocked and appalled. But what did she think was happening at the dream village? It's always tricky in stories, to depict the conscience of an ambitious schemer who's done plenty of evil herself. How do you make it feel real that there are lines she won't cross?

Oh no, the girl from the orphanage is here. Her grief over this one individual feels realistic. She sees herself in this girl. And she's already been seen to have emotional connections to individual people (Jae Hui and Yo-Han)

ah, so Min Jeong Ho accepted the Chief Justice position. What is he thinking? Has he been corrupted or does he still think he's doing good with this? "doing good" was not how Seon-Ah sold it to him, though

(37:49) I don't believe it though. Besides the fact this is not the kind of story they're telling, that didn't even show him die. But, what did happen then?

this music, their music, playing over Ga-On's face. It still makes me sad even though I'm pretty sure he's not dead. and we see Ga-On in reflection, hmm. Does that mean he's behind this fake-out, or just that there is scheming afoot in general?

Seon-Ah's reaction. her face. the wine. she did love him, in whatever form of love/obsession that was. and the way they're cutting between Ga-On and Seon-Ah's reactions. hmm.

(also that was the most colorful outfit we've seen on her, or anyone, yet)

hyenas in their yellowing den.

i'm wondering - As these rich men take more and more power back, their meeting places get smaller, less stylized and more "realistic" if that's the word. those early shots from above of that stylized table in those stylized grey rooms. whereas this feels like the kind of ugly expensive old fashioned rooms where the backroom deals really happen. and the lighting gives everything the same yellowish tint that most of the shots from the blue house had. It's the lighting for people who don't care how they look because they don't need to impress.

I don't know how to interpret this yet, because I still can't predict who is going to "win" in the end. although I guess my gut is saying it's going to be the Two Representative Businessmen, cause i can't see a way out, storywise.

(40:40) What is Min Yong Sik doing here? If i'm remembering correctly, this is the first time that one of our Two Representative Businessmen has come up with a plan independently (on screen, i'm sure they have lots of plotting happening that they don't show us). This feels significant, like they're no longer background characters.

um, this shot of the back of her head in her desk chair while she's holding a cigar is making me nervous. That is way too similar to the final frames of Minister Cha. like, these are very explicit parallels.

unformed gender thoughts on women and cigars, and the hyena trio's misogyny. which also didn't really get shown until about halfway through the series.

all four of them look confident that they have the upper hand. Who is right?

Seon-Ah even orders her assistant to get her a gun. Is this going to be a re-writing of Cha's story, or an echo?

I'm excited to see what her plan is! I assume she's not going to straight up shoot the president on live tv.

Oh Jin Ju, the secret weapon in this scheming, one we wouldn't have expected from her silly beginnings. I love this for her. and somehow despite the odds, she managed to feel like a real person.

uh oh, what is Ga-On planning? Why does Oh Jin Ju need to leave? my immediate thought is: bomb? and is he acting out of rage and despair because he thinks Yo-Han is dead? or does he know that he's not, and this is part of a bigger plan. I can't see how they could be working together, but they have a lot of secret friends that keep emerging when needed. oh right, he was going to reveal the truth about the medical experiments at dream village. Is this how? is he bravely soldiering on with his work of exposing evil, despite his grief?

oh wow. he's been suicidal since Yo-Han got arrested. This was planned before Yo-Han's (alleged) death. no wonder he looked so blank faced at the news. but i don't think he's actually going to die. We have 45 minutes left. and i don't think it's that kind of story. (she reassures herself)

the plan sort of makes sense from a p.r. standpoint, i guess.

but also, Ga-On. you've been so broken down. There's been so much other plotting going on that I sort of forgot about your grief, but your grief is huge.

FUCKK! I was genuinely not expecting that! (47:40) but this is the perfect way to get us out of this predicament.

also so fucking romantic. This is not platonic. there is no need to shove him up against the wall to disarm the bond. Yo-Han's James Bond smile, his hands on Ga-On's chest. the slow mo, the way they look at each other. the way they can't stop touching each other. That embrace!! (probably the closest thing we're getting to a kiss)

Also, Yo-Han has shifted the tone to confident and humorous. it's heist movie vibes. So I'm starting to feel hopeful we'll get a happy ending for these two after all. it may not be a logical victory, but i'll take it.

Is he bluffing? Who cares? He's hot.

oh, i thought that was the plan they made, they were going to use the fight to smuggle him out somehow. or even switch places with the dead guy. but the warden was shocked.

I see that Yo-Han is not fully reformed. still unbothered by killing this guy. In fact, he looks a little high off of it. That's less disturbing now that I know it wasn't premeditated. I'm glad actually that he's staying a bit feral, a little amoral.

and Yo-Han adapted and came up with the same plan as me. (everybody is getting smuggled out in body bags)

The plot is flying at us fast and furious now. it may not make sense, but it's gonna keep moving. and I'll place a bet on our boys winning. I don't know how this tonal shift is going to fit with Seon-Ah's storyline.

This man loves his vengeance. (52:20)

(53:15) I had a sudden image of the 7 of them trapped inside the court room and killing each other off, gladiator style. we know (assume) there's at least one gun in the room. it would be a convenient way to get rid of them all, but i don't think it's going to happen. a) it leaves Ga-On and Yo-Han too uninvolved. and b) i just don't think its that kind of story. But I would buy one or two of them dying. the president? Chairman Park? Chairman Min still has a scheme afoot that i'm expecting to see play out.

of course. This is cute. and obvious now that it's happening. return to our roots - the public trials.

The wives finally get names! (or perhaps the subtitles finally give the names?)

yeah, i think they would react with a little more composure? or at least pull themselves together quickly. they're used to being in the public eye, to maintaining an image. i guess they are drunk

but mostly i expect this is how the show is going to resolve the unresolvable - the satisfying theatrics of a trial, the powerful conveniently acting like idiots, and just ignore what happens to the country after this power vacuum opens up.

although i wonder what's going to happen with Seon-Ah's Chekhov's gun. I'm betting someone will die. If forced to guess, I would say her, even with this tonal shift.

(58:24) this moment though. this moment with Ga-On and prof. Min. it works, it's poignant, i can feel the history and the heartbreak.

but i guess we've gone to a black and white thinking type of world. Prof. Min needs to stay the bad guy, so that Yo-Han can be the good guy and Ga-On's choice is justified. The frustrating thing is that it still makes sense for Ga-On to choose Yo-Han even if both are morally grey. but that doesn't wrap things neatly in a bow. It could be that what we're seeing here is just Ga-On making that choice, but it feels like this is also the show's point of view.

Yo-Han just really wants to get the public to collectively murder somebody.

I feel like he's not actaully going to set off the bomb, the tone is too cheerful for that. but who knows at this point.

i was right about the 'trapped in a death room' vibes.

At least this time we're not pretending he's a legit judge. but we've gone back to a conveniently credulous public that will do whatever is necessary to move the plot along.

but Seon-Ah's face. this whole time

I should stop trying to find logic in places where I know it doesn't exist, but it seems like people can vote as many times as they want? How is that democracy? (shushshush, we're here for the vibes. for Yo-Han looking like a badass. stop thinking)

He's going to the courtroom?

Min Yong Sik is muttering to himself. OH! he was scheming with Yo-Han since that meeting where he suddenly became an individual? That's why he suggested the celebration here? I wonder what he thought the plan was?

But why do any of them ever agree to do anything with each other? it always seems to end in betrayal.

Drama! but he's not suicidal. The tone of this doesn't match that at all.

Ga-On is freaking out though, understandably.

oh, it was a threat against chairman Min, not a promise. that makes more sense.

i love a long-legged Yo-Han leaning against his bedframe.

I assume this part is all filmed and broadcast as well?

ooooh. and they're connecting it back to the church fire as well. unfortunately it's just a reminder of how flimsy that plotline turned out to be.

It's still powerful imagery though. the lights are going on one by one. the rachmaninoff over the slow mo fighting and hair pulling that echoes the chaos in the classroom flashback. the switch to that tender violin music and then the footage from the church fire. Yo-Han's face as he stands there unmoving. his face! his "hyung"

(1:09:02) and this is their final faceoff. black vs. white. waiting unmoving on opposite sides of the room as the power brokers fight like desperate children, not even noticing Seon-Ah.

about 20 minutes remaining.

and THAT was the correct use of Chekhov's gun. perfect timing

Yo-Han's little smile. I think he does love her, a little, in a way. he knows they are kindred spirits.

this faceoff. "Is it the two of us, in the end?" "Come with me, Seon-Ah."

I think this ending is working for me after all. bringing us tightly back to our main relationships.

"Come with me, Seon-Ah." and that slight smile. oh, I'm getting chills. maybe i was wrong, maybe he has to die for Ga-On to be free? I don't know!! This is getting intense again. their faces. her slight smile. the tears in both their eyes. they see themselves in each other. wow. both completely ignoring the people around them begging. eyes fixed on each other

and it's not a performance of sexuality. all their previous interactions had this layer of pretend sexual seduction. but this is just them, stripped bare at the end, seeing themselves in each other's eyes.

exhale. i'm both shocked and yet was also expecting that. She was given too many exact parallels to Minister Cha. But why did she make that decision?

(i'm getting concerned that all three of our major women have died (and all by gun))

the last lines of the song, right before she shot herself, were"I cannot stop it anymore, it swallows me whole. save me from myself" was that what she was doing, sacrificing herself to save Yo-Han? she jumped out the window before for him (so far as they've explained) "damm it, this is bullshit" she said before she put the gun to her head.

oh god, the broken plate. and his kindness. heart wrenching

more thoughts on her "you know, i always loved you, young master" later

this overhead shot. her white dress (she wears white to murder) Yo-Han's face. his sigh.

and as soon as the Yo-Han & Seon-Ah relationship is resolved, Ga-On comes rushing through the door. less than 20 minutes to resolve everything.

I don't know whether to believe him. it really depends on which story they're trying to tell. A[repentant?] Yo-Han, ready to die for justice and because he thinks he's done with his work, feels compellingly intense. and it gives Ga-On the chance to save him. or to lose him. and even with Elijah his love has been the sacrificial kind, not the stay with her kind.

but it just doens't feel like who he is. he's not suicidal. and he would not let Ga-On stay there to die too. that just feels absolutely out of character for any version of him.

Once again I wonder, is this being broadcast to the nation?

"I will go with you." "You will be the hero. For the devil, I will be enough." wow what lines. I guess he's genuine? and they're going for emotional intensity over plot and character logic? i'll buy in, these guys do intensity so well.

holy fuck

and the intensity delivered. I'm actually crying right now. I wanted to see them together. elijah. my babies. Even though two minutes ago I was complaining that it makes no sense, it's still emotionally devastating. my god. Ga-On. What are you going to do? you've lost absolutely everyone. I want to hope that it was a trick, we didn't see him die, just the ceiling falling down. but... ah, who even knows at this point

the full circle symbolism of him destroying this courtroom at the end.

Ga-On sitting on the curb. Oh Jin Ju's kindness. him wandering that house alone. I keep crying.

I want to have hope for a twist, but I'm scared.

remembering the times when one of them was shirtless. their history. (yeah this ain't a platonic relationship)

[long exhale] oh. this memory of the cards. and Elijah wasn't there. I'm starting to have hope. Hope is a dangerous thing. oh fuck.

(1:21:55) holy fuck, yes!!! YES!! this blueprint. I think I'm allowed to hope now. Are my dreams coming true? Is this happy little family going to hide from the evil world together?

they really just wanted to fit all the endings in there.

ok, whew. i didn't really think elijah would have committed suicide. but for a second there I was kinda worried.

What is this "just the two of us" nonsense, Yo-Han? you're not going to bring your boyfriend? you left him hints.

ok, we're wrapping everybody up. The housekeeper. Judge Oh..

send Ga-On to Switzerland at the last second, show. or have Yo-Han pop up somewhere unexpected to surprise Ga-On. please don't let me down. you don't have to make them gay. just let them be together. Ga-On is alone now, you've gotten rid of everyone else in his life, you can't leave him without his new family. please don't let me down. we've made it this far.

structurally though, i think it's likely. We have at least five minutes left and we're saying farewell to the supporting characters. and i really don't think they'll leave him alone, this is turning into a happy ending type ending. and an alone Ga-On is a melancholy ending.

oh, i guess they've gotta try and wrap up the political stuff too. a sober meeting in a sober room (one we've never seen before) and a sobor new group of people (whom we've never seen before) we'll pretend that starting over with all new politicians will make things ok so our heroes are free to leave the stage.

(1:29:58) hmm, maybe I read that one slightly wrong. It looks like there will be infighting and power games among this new group. we do get an inspiring hero speech from Ga-On about justice and responsibility. and a brief defense of Yo-Han

I guess another possible ending is he becomes the hero he was set up to be from the beginning, and stays to work tirelessly to reform the judicial system. But even then I think we'll see a text message or something from Yo-Han in the final seconds.

I really want him to go to Switzerland though.

ok, Ga-On yet again asking the questions that are on my mind. "It's the same, nothing has changed. What should I do now, to help create a world that doesn't need Yo-Han?"

wait. Is this it?! Is this how they're making my dreams come true?! not to mention Ga-On's dreams!

oh fuck yeah! who cares if it makes any sense, this is amazing! that salute at the top of the balcony! they're having Ga-On run to his love!!

oh my god. their faces. the tears in their eyes. the love the connection. it maybe looked a little like a goodbye, like a one final taking him in before he's gone forever. But. i'm going to choose to believe it was taking him in after you had almost lost him. because Yo-Han's little nod just before he walked away? i'm going to interpret that as a "follow me"

ok. ok

I guess they're going with an open ending. They had Yo-Han walk away and Ga-On stand there staring after him. So viewer's choice. It could be that it was their last farewell. Ga-On stays and works to reform the government.

But. they gave us enough for me to believe that Ga-On follows him and they end up together, somewhere, whether it's Korea or Switzerland, whether Ga-On still keeps working on reforms, or he retires and becomes a hermit with his new family.

Look, Yo-Han has already returned from being lost at least three times. He's gonna pop up in Ga-On's life again.

fucking homophobia. I don't know what forces were at play that led to them making what is very obviously a romance and then censoring it. but the romance side did manage to give us an ending that felt happy with only a little squinting. so good job them.

I could probably write a lot more words about the themes and storytelling of this series. But I'm just gonna take some time to recover from that emotional roller coaster of the final 30 minutes, and bask in their love.

eps 1&2 ep3 ep4 ep5 ep6 ep7 ep8 ep9 ep10 ep11 ep12 ep13 ep14 ep15 ep16

#the devil judge episode 16 #kind of like liveblogging #the devil judge reaction #the devil judge #the devil judge spoilers #reaction by gillianthecat

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