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javierpenaspinkshirt · 4 years

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A Hundred Questions.

Mando x Reader - One Shot

Warnings: it’s fluffy and it’s soft and it’s a lil bit sweet. Loose Star Wars lore. Brief mentions of death. Dodgy formatting.

Words: 5.2k (woah, right?)

Summary: Mando is a touch starved man who just wants to be loved send tweet.

A/N: I wrote this while I was meant to be writing several reports for work so if you enjoy this soft rambling lmk so I can tell my boss I didn’t waste my whole day.

A Hundred Questions

It had been 6 months, you worked out, since you had met the Mandalorian.

He had landed on Jakku for supplies, knowing it was on an old trade route but also knowing it was only a mere few years on from the battle that had finally seen the Empire fall. He had assumed it would be largely empty and fairly quiet and he was right.

Mando had docked the Razor Crest in one of the bays you were overseeing that day. You’d had to stop your jaw dropping when you had seen him walking down the ramp of his ship towards you. You had seen a lot in your life, but never a Mandalorian. He had sauntered over to you and tipped a few credits into your hand.

‘I need some rewiring done’ his voice was gruff and tired, ‘will this be enough to get it done before I return?’

You looked at the credits in your hand, it was more cash than you had seen in years.

‘Absolutely’ you replied, ‘I’ll have her like new in no time’.

He nodded and walked passed you to leave. You turned to watch him go only to see what looked like a large green ear sticking out of the backpack the Mandalorian was wearing. You knew Mandos were often bounty hunters so you thought nothing more of it, only that it was none of your business.

You did your job and fixed up the ship as best you could. Your dad had been a mechanic before the war. He’d taught you everything he knew and though you had groaned and whined at the time, you were so grateful to him now. You had lost both of your parents and your siblings in the Battle of Jakku a few years ago. You had only survived because you had been underground working in the mines as the battle had begun. You and your fellow miners had hidden and waited out the siege. Eventually you had resurfaced to learn that the battle had been won by the Republic, but the fighting continued on for months until the last Imp dropped.

Mercifully you had survived the onslaught, but not everyone in your company had had your luck. Though you used the term ‘luck’ loosely.

The Imperial forces had arrived on Jakku months before the battle ensued, and in that time they had terrorised the locals. Your existence was an insult to them and they would assault and even kill residents simply for being there. But when the the last one finally dropped you couldn’t bring yourself to celebrate. You were on your own, and you had to get off this planet.

You had spent years working as a mechanic in one of the few lasting ship ports and had saved as much money as you could. You were hoping to be able to afford a small ship just to be able to get the hell away from Jakku and find somewhere, anywhere, else to be.

So when the Mandalorian returned from his trip for supplies you figured you would try and rinse him for a few extra credits. Every little helps, right?

He was walking with purpose towards you and the Crest, bag stuffed full of supplies and a tiny green child, like nothing you had ever seen before, waddling behind him.

‘Is it done?’ He asked, stopping to stand beside you and admire your handy work.

‘Yeah all done no problem, but I’m going to have to charge you for parts’ you wiped your hands on your overalls and put your hands on your hips to look up at him, hoping it made you look important and serious.

‘I’m not paying for anything extra’ the helmet turned to look down at you, ‘I asked for wiring, nothing more’.

His voice was low and gravelly. It made your stomach flip and you lost your cool.

‘Hey you asked me to fix what I could and I did, this thing is gonna fly better than it did when it was built, mate! I need the money for parts!’

‘Absolutely not’ was the only response you received before he bent down to scoop up the strange green child who was cooing at his feet, and began to walk aboard the ship.

‘Wait!’ You called, running up the gang plank to catch him ‘please! Please I need this, please! You don’t understand’ the desperation caught in your throat as you ran passed him and stood in front of him to stop him walking up any further.

‘Please’ you lowered your voice and looked around to make sure none of the other mechanics, or god forbid the boss, could hear you pleading, ‘please, I have to get out of here, I need the money’.

You couldn’t see his eyes, but you knew the Mandalorian was staring you down, making a judgment of you and deciding whether you were worth his time.

‘What are you like with kids?’

Your eyes widened, ‘excuse me?’

He held the little green child close to his chest and looked down at him. The baby cooed at him and made a little grabby motion at the helmet.

‘Can you look after a child?’

The truth was you’d never met a child you liked. You had had several siblings before the war and as the oldest you had often been stuck babysitting, and rather than hone any kind of parental instinct you may have had it had dragged it behind the barn and shot it dead. You adored your siblings of course, and you missed them endlessly, but you would rather have been their sibling than their surrogate parent. Children were your nightmare, but if the small green boy was your ticket out of here… Then you guessed you were going to have to learn to like him.

‘I can’ you agreed, ‘but I’m not a glorified babysitter y’know, I’m a mechanic and a damn good one!’

‘I know, you would be a valuable crew mate. I don’t need a babysitter, I need a mechanic and someone I can trust around the child’, his helmet dropped to look at the baby again. If you could have seen his face you would’ve seen the smile spread across it as he looked down at his little foundling.

‘Trust is very important to me’ you explained, ‘I promise I wont let you down’.

The Mandalorian straightened and sighed, ‘go grab whatever you need and meet me back here in an hour. If you’re not here, I will leave without you’.

Your eyes widened and you darted off the ship calling out behind you that you’d be back soon.

That had been 6 months ago. Since then you had been travelling with Mando and the little boy and it was the freest you had ever felt. You’d fallen into comfortable routine with your time split between him piloting and securing jobs and you maintaining the old ship, keeping her flying and keeping her safe. You shared taking care of the child and, despite your initial reservation, you had fallen in love with the little creature. He was different to human children, he needed more supervision than care and was capable of moving himself around the ship with alarming speed. He’d often sit beside you, fiddling with bolts or some of your tools while you fixed things and he’d watch with those big inquisitive eyes as you grumbled about the mess the wiring was in or rambled on with stories of your childhood. He made you miss your siblings but you pushed those painful feelings aside whenever they arose, instead choosing to tell the little one stories of happy times with your family, especially your dad. He would smile and cock his head as you spoke to him.

Occasionally Mando would listen from the cockpit if you were close enough for him to hear. You never really spoke to him about your family… but that was largely because he didn’t ask. Usually you’d sit with him of an evening once the child was asleep. He’d be in the pilot’s seat and you would sit behind him and ask him a hundred mindless questions. Sometimes he’d answer, sometimes he’d just grunt, but he enjoyed the way your mind worked. He had explained to you early on about the rules about his helmet and he had been relieved when you had immediately respected them. You would make the occasional joke,

‘Bet you’re a gungan under there’ you’d smirk.

Like he hadn’t heard that one before. But he didn’t mind because it was you. You would ask him about his armour, about the creed, you’d even once asked about his family. He’d revealed that he was a foundling but nothing more. You had got the hint and stopped your questioning.

This evening was no different. Mando had secured a job on some outer rim planet you’d never even heard of and you were only an hour or so away from landing. The child had nodded off so you’d left him in the cot in the hull where the two of you usually slept, leaving the door open so you could hear if he stirred from the cockpit.

You resumed your usual position in the co-pilot’s chair and started your usual barrage of questions. Mando grunted at most of them and answered a few.

‘So tell me then, Mandalorian’ you crooned ‘when was the last time you took the helmet off?’

‘This morning’ was the typically blunt answer.

‘Okay but when?’

He spun round in his chair to look at you, beskar glinting, ‘this morning when you were feeding the child’.

‘I’m gonna have to get sneakier if I’m going to ever catch a glimpse of you aren’t I?’ you chuckled.

He let out a gentle exhale. He knew you were joking, he trusted you never to look as you promised you wouldn’t. But he still felt a well of anxiety when you’d joke.

You sensed you’d gone too far and backtracked, ‘sorry I shouldn’t have said that, I was only playing. I would never, Mando. I promise, I owe you my life I’m not going to be the one to ruin yours’.

He cocked his head to the left gently and you hoped it was because he was smiling.

The truth was you hadn’t ruined his life. You’d turned it upside down a little but he didn’t mind. After the events of the last year, protecting the child, having to go on the run, having to face down Moff Gideon and almost dying… being out here with you and his foundling was the escape he craved. He had mentioned Cara to you briefly but he offered no detail as to the origin of the child or any stories about what had lead him to arrive on Jakku and meet you.

He wasn’t ready to talk about it yet and he knew you understood. Though you could question him for hours about all sorts of inane crap, you were good at taking no for an answer.

But the one thing you would bring up consistently was his helmet. He knew you were curious. You wanted to know who the man under the Beskar was and he understood that. He got to look at you all day, see the way you smiled at the child or the way your brow furrowed when you were thinking. He got to see your body, clothed of course, but he got to see the way your hips swayed when you walked or the way the muscles in your arms worked when you were lying down trying to fix something on the ship. You hadn’t even seen the colour of his skin.

He wanted to show you more of him. He had slowly and cautiously admitted feelings for you to himself but he wasn’t ready to admit them to you yet. In the last month or so he had started putting his forehead against yours, especially before he went to bed. You would get up to go down to the hull to curl up with the baby while he would stay upstairs in the sleeping quarters behind the cockpit. But he’d make a point of gently pulling you to him and putting his forehead against yours for just a moment. You never questioned it but he could feel the way your body would tense when he held your arms and then relax as he gently tapped the helmet against you. He didn’t think you knew what this gesture meant and he wasn’t going to explain it. But he hoped you were getting the hint without him having to say anything.

He was still looking at you, waiting for your next question of the night when there was an almighty thump and the ship shuddered violently. Without thought or hesitation you were out of your seat and down the ladder into the hull. The little one had woken up at the jolt and squealed as you scooped him up and ran back up to the cockpit.

Another clang and all the lights bar the dashboard control and the dodgy LED emergency lighting went out. The cockpit was dark save for the blue lights of the dashboard and the child squealed again and clung to your clothes. You sat down in the co-pilot chair and hung for dear life, holding the child as tightly as you dared.

‘Hold on’ Mando commanded as he threw the ship around, dodging what you could now see were meteors and space junk flying at the Crest at alarming speed. The planet you were headed towards was well in view now and you hoped to gods that Mando could get you there without doing too much more damage to the ship.

A few more minor knocks and a few hisses from the engines and Mando managed to land on a baron plain, covered with what must be ash, with no sign of a moon or sun and a dark cloud swelling.

‘This… is where the job is?’ You looked out of the window, holding the child up so he could see where his father had almost crash landed you.

‘Yes. Sorry I shouldn’t have taken my eye off the controls… the meteors knocked the lights and the heat out’ He flicked a few switches but to no avail and slumped back in his chair.

‘Can you fix it?’ He turned the chair to look at you.

‘I can but not until morning, its dark and I wont be able to see properly even with a flashlight. I’d have to go outside to see the damage but if I’m honest I don’t really wanna do that tonight… even with you standing guard’.

Mando agreed and stood up, ‘it’s going to be too cold for you and the kid in the hull tonight, you’ll have to stay in my quarters’.

A lump caught in your throat, ‘with you?’ You hadn’t meant for it to sound quite as eager as it did but it was out there now.

‘No’ was the matter of fact reply, ‘I’ll be here, I can sleep in the chair.’

‘No way, Mando, if you’re going on a job tomorrow you need to sleep, you can have the child in your room, I’ll stay here’ you stood up to make a point.

He sighed. The baby whimpered gently, he was cold. You held him close and wrapped him in the cloak you were wearing. It used to be an old cape Mando wore but it had been ripped and was way too short for him. You adopted it and patched it up and proudly wore it everywhere, it was your little piece of him. Now you used it to wrap the little one tightly to try and warm him.

The temperature outside was freezing and without the heat in the ship you would all be feeling the cold in no time.

Mando finally stirred, ‘I have an idea.’

You looked at him as he sunk down on to his haunches in front of you. He took hold of the loose end of the cape you were holding the baby in and took a knife from his boot. He cut a small length from the cape and held it out to you.

‘Take this. Go into my room, get the baby settled and get yourself comfortable. Then put this over your eyes and call for me’ he was so matter of fact about it that you didn’t question it, just did as you were told.

You had never actually been in Mando’s sleeping quarters before. It was a small room, no kind of decoration or homely nature to it, classic Mando. There was a single cot in the corner against the wall that you assumed he would make you sleep on, you knew him well enough not to fight him on that. You put the baby down on the floor, still wrapped in your cloak. His eyes were drooping and he was gently cooing to himself.

‘Getting sleepy, little one? You can sleep here, I’ll get you your blankets and we’ll make you a nice bed, yeah?’ You spoke to him softly and he lifted his little hand to you. You took his hand and gave it gentle kiss before zipping down to the hull to grab the blankets the two of you usually shared. It was freezing in the hull and you were grateful to Mando for insisting you slept in his room.

You went back to his quarters and swaddled the baby tightly. You put him on the floor at the foot of the cot so you could still hear him if he woke up but wouldn’t squish him or accidentally kick him out of the small bed in your sleep. He drifted off as you were positioning him comfortably, you thanked your stars.

You had grabbed a long tunic from the hull and changed into that, discarding your clothes and boots on the floor. You felt the cold and dived under the thin covers on the cot and put the makeshift blindfold over your eyes.

‘I’ve got the blindfold on’ you called, a slightly inappropriate thought raced to the front of your mind but you shoved it back before any damage was done.

You heard the door open and close and the gentle thud of Mando’s boots on the floor. The room was completely dark save for one small port hole on the far wall. You probably didn’t even need the blindfold, you couldn’t have seen him anyway! But you knew the blindfold helped his peace of mind.

You sat in the bed as you listened to the delicate, dull thuds of pieces of beskar being removed. You tried to guess what was what by the weight of the thud but you gave up after the third piece. Finally the quite clanging stopped and a heavy silence hung in the air.

‘You promise me you wont take that blindfold off?’ His voice was still modulated, the helmet still on.

‘I promise’.

There was a gentle hiss and a click and a quite thunk as he put the helmet down on the floor. You heard him move closer to you then drop what you guessed were blankets on the floor. You could hear him shuffling around, laying one blanket on the floor then covering himself with the other. He was still at last.

‘Good night, Mando’ you whispered into the blackness.

No response but an un-gloved hand reached up from his makeshift bed on the floor and gently squeezed yours.

Your whole body tingled. You couldn’t see him, or anything at all for that matter, but that was the first skin to skin contact you had ever had with your usually beskar-clad hero. You placed your other hand on top of his and squeezed back. That was enough for him and he removed his hand and you heard him wriggle a little until he was silent again.

What you didn’t know was that his heart was racing. He hadn’t felt the touch of another person for longer than he cared to count and it was all the more wild that it was you he had finally been able to touch.

But the memory of the last time he had had his helmet removed haunted him and clouded the joy he so wanted to feel. The flashbacks came occasionally; the explosion, the ringing in his ears and the blood. He’d had to tell Cara to take the child and to run for their lives. He had laid there in the rubble and dust, smoke filling the air and a droid, that would later go on to sacrifice itself for him, standing over him reasoning as to why it should take his helmet off.

In the end he had relented and allowed it to and IG had saved his life. But the trauma of the whole ordeal was still too fresh to ignore and lying on the cold floor of his room, completely exposed without any of his armour was almost too much to bear.

He wanted to sit up and slide himself into bed next to you and hold you, if for nothing more than comfort. He’d been alone for so long and suddenly he had a foundling, a family of friends, and a crew mate he wished was more than just crew. It was a lot to take in but you were pretty good at calming his nerves when he needed it. There had been a few instances when bounties had proven to be tougher than expected but you had always been there waiting for him to return, somehow knowing all the right things to say but you had never dared reach out and touch him, fearing it would offend or upset him. Really it was what he wanted most.

Sensing the restless body on the floor beside you you attempted to reach out and feel where he was. Your icy cold hand made contact with his bare shoulder and he hissed and shot away from you.

‘Shit sorry I didn’t realise you were so close!’ You whispered, trying your best not to laugh but a small snort escaped you and you clasped your hand over your mouth to prevent another.

‘What are you? Part Trandoshan? You must be cold blooded!’ his response was sharp but there was humour in it.

‘Trandoshan? Tall, fearsome, not a fan of Wookiees? You got me’ you giggled quietly again but stopped abruptly when you realised that was the first time you had ever heard his voice un-modulated.

You could hear him breathing slightly heavily from the shock and you took in every breath not knowing whether you would ever hear it without the helmet again.

He settled back down and calmed himself. The shock of the freezing hand on his arm had shaken him from his rapid thoughts of lava tunnels and enemy fire and left his heart racing again.

‘Are you really that cold?’ He whispered up at you.

You nodded but realised he couldn’t see you and rolled over so you were on your front looking down at him, ‘I’m from a desert planet, I don’t do cold! But I’ll be fine once I’m asleep’.

Mando formulated a plan but first he quietly sat up to look at the foot of the bed. He moved to his hands and knees silently and knelt down as he touched his hand to the child’s sleeping forehead. He felt warm enough, safely enveloped in the blankets you had wrapped him in and happily snoring in deep sleep. Mando smiled to himself.

Then, before you could ask a question or protest, Mando pushed you over to the edge of the cot and against the wall. His hands were warm as he gently scooted you over and awkwardly fumbled with the covers as he got in beside you. He was trying to be as quiet as possible but the bed frame creaked, only used to having to support one body.

‘You’ll wake the kid!’ You hissed.

He shushed you and flipped you so that your back was against his torso. He slipped an arm under your neck and draped the other over your ribs and pulled you tight against him. He reached up with the arm under your neck and gently checked the blindfold was still in place.

You smiled at his abundance of caution ‘it’s still there’, you reassured him ‘not that I could see you without it anyway, it’s so dark’.

He huffed gently and put his arm back down and held you close to him.

He was bare chest but radiating heat like a small thermal oscillator. You sunk into him not wanting to cause too much of a fuss in case you put him off and he went back to the floor. But you desperately wanted him to talk to you. You wanted to hear his voice and see what he sounded like when he laughed and you desperately wanted to know what he looked like. You knew you couldn’t see him and you wouldn’t ask to, but maybe you could feel him?

You began to wriggle as slowly as possible to avoid the bed squeaking too much and rolled yourself over so that you were lying on your other side, face to face with Mando. You made sure the blindfold was in place and put your hands down in the small gap between your bodies so as not to touch him with them and startle him with the cold again.

He still had an arm under your neck and the other now gently traced circles on your back.

‘Mando?’ you began.

He grunted back at you and you had to stifle another laugh. Even in the most intimate moment you’d ever shared his immediate response was to grunt at you.

‘Mando… can I touch you? Is that allowed?’

His breathing hitched and you felt him shift ever so slightly and you feared you’d done exactly what you were afraid of and crossed a line.

He moved his arm from your back and took your hands in his. His one hand was big enough to envelop both of yours and you had to smother another inappropriate thought before it blossomed.

‘Not until these are warmer’ he whispered giving your hands a squeeze.

You beamed at him and you hoped he could see you even just a little bit to know how happy you were at the possibility of actually being allowed to touch your Mandalorian’s skin.

He couldn’t see you, but your faces were close enough that he could feel the way you sucked in air in an excited gasp as he said it and he was sure you were smiling at him.

He carefully brought your hands up to his chest and rested them there, letting go and returning his hand to your back and pulling you closer still so that your bodies were touching, his chin resting carefully on the crown of your head.

You spent a few moments just taking in everything you could about him. His skin was soft but scarred. You traced scars and old wounds across his back and his chest. His shoulders were tough and knotted, muscular but tired from carrying the weight of the beskar pauldrons every day since he was little. Every scar told a story and maybe one day you’d be allowed to see them, not just feel them, and you’d be able to ask a hundred questions about how and where… but for now you just gently dipped your fingers into every mark that made him who he was.

You moved up to his neck and felt his heart rate racing as your hands edged closer to his face. You stopped just below his jaw and shifted your head up to look at him. As was normal to you now, you couldn’t see his eyes so you just stared where you hoped they were.

He gave you a timid nod and you breathed in hard as you slowly moved your hands up to his jawline. There was stubble, maybe a few days worth. You wondered if he shaved often? His jawline was sharp and defined, you had imagined it as such. You gently moved your fingers along it, taking in every dip of his mandible that indicated an old injury, every mark you could feel that could have once been a wound, and enjoyed the knowledge that even a proud warrior couldn’t always be bothered to shave.

You left one hand at his jaw and moved the other up his cheek, stroking it gently with your thumb, and moved across to his nose. It was pronounced but fitted the shape of his face beautifully. You would have to imagine how striking his side profile must be. There was a scar across it and little ridge at the bridge that suggested that maybe it had been broken once. You weren’t going to ask now.

You carefully traced a thumb over his closed eye, his eyelashes long and his eyebrows unkempt but not wild – a little like him maybe. You moved up his forehead, more scars and bruising, you wondered exactly how much good that helmet did him. Finally you found his hair and you ran your hand through it and pulled ever so slightly. It was longer than you imagined but not so long that he didn’t care for it. The fact it was at the length it was meant he must cut his own hair, that was enough to pull a smile out of you.

He felt you smile against him and he winced slightly, afraid you were laughing at his messy hair or his bruised face. You rubbed your other hand against his jaw.

‘What colour is you hair?’ The question was tentative, walking on thin ice and unsure how far was too far.

‘Brown’ he whispered, the bass in his voice making your soul leap a little.

You moved your hand back down to his eyelid, ‘and these?’

‘Also brown’ the whisper was even quieter now.

‘Mando, I think you’re beautiful’ you said it as sincerely as you could. You meant it.

He didn’t respond, just lay there still as anything, holding you against him.

You rested your palm on his cheek, feeling the stubble under it as he moved his head to look down at you. He put his forehead against yours as delicately as he could.

You could have stayed there for a hundred years. Wrapped in his arms, his forehead pressed to yours, feeling his breathing slow as his heart rate settled, his skin against yours.

But he moved, and you were afraid that was the end until he took his hand from your back and used it to tilt your chin up towards his face.

You felt his lips against yours and it was like an explosion had been let off inside you. It was tentative and cautious but he held your chin firm, not wanting you to move away from him. His lips were soft, a little chapped, but so undeniably him. Firm but inviting, hesitant but wanting.

He moved his hand to tuck a stray strand of hair behind your ear, being careful not to knock the blindfold and broke the kiss. He put his forehead back against yours and stroked your cheek with his thumb.

You put your hands back on his chest and lay still with him. He would kiss you again but he would need a minute first. And that was fine by you. This was unchartered territory for him and you would give him as long as he needed. There would be time for a hundred questions later.

#the mandalorian #the mandalorian x reader #the mandalorian x you #din djarin #din djarin x you #din djarin x reader #mando #the mandalorian fanfic #din djarin fanfiction #din djarin fic #the mandalorian fic #pedro pascal #a hundred questions #the mandalorian fanfiction #dyn jarren #the mandalorian imagine

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if-you-built-yourself-a-myth · 3 years

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Check Ignition: Part IX

That Sobbe fake-dating Hogwarts au that one person asked for and I dove into headfirst

First part // Previous part // Next part

This fic is wrapping up and I love writing longform, so send me your new requests! (or ideas for oneshots, I love those too)

Robbe was ashamed to admit many of the things that made his apartment home. Here it was, the truth of it: everything here was in some way tainted by sickness. He didn’t talk about it while he was at school. He didn’t talk about school while he was here. It made sense to keep the two lives distinctly separate, save from a few consolation sessions with Jens and the occasional fact for Sander.

He bumped his shoulders on the narrow doorframe as he lugged his trunk inside, his mother right behind him. In the entryway, on a tiny side table, three bottles of prescription medication waited their arrival. Each had a sticky note designating the time of next dose. Past that, the hall led straight to a kitchen at its end. Three rooms—two bedrooms, one bathroom—broke off before then. Their living room branched from the kitchen, big enough for a couch and a flatscreen TV as well as a small-ish Christmas tree.

This apartment worked in a way that his friends’ magic-filled homes did not. Sure, when his father was around, they never did the dishes manually or resorted to blankets when the heating went out, but it wasn’t what Jens had. Perhaps that was why Robbe did not see Jens much over the holidays.

Robbe crossed the threshold to his bedroom and dropped his things on his bed. His thoughts returned, as they were wont to do, to Sander. Sander must be all alone at Hogwarts right now. Robbe didn’t know what to make of him.

“It’s Christmas,” said Robbe aloud to jar himself from that rabbit trail. He put away everything that mattered. Scattered everything that didn’t across the floor. There, now it felt like his dormitory at school.

Against his better judgement, he scrawled out something on a scrap of paper. Maybe if he could contact Sander, things would make more sense. Or maybe he was stupid. Either way. A simple tracking spell, an open window, and it would zip its way to its recipient at Hogwarts. He doubted he’d get in trouble for such a simple use of underage magic.

Happy Christmas. Sorry you have to spend it alone. Yeah, it totally didn’t sound sarcastic.

Robbe let the message go. He watched it disappear over the London skyline, dancing above the twinkling lights of the city. This view had nothing on the view from Hogwarts. After that, he was exhausted from exams week. He curled up on his mattress—the sheets on this one were a nice touch—and went right to sleep. There was time for life to happen tomorrow, and he didn’t fancy making conversation with his mother so soon into their two weeks of forced proximity.

***

Robbe spent most of the next days hiding out in his bedroom. Jens took care of his required communication rather early in their separation; the owl arrived at Robbe’s window before lunchtime the second day: Robbe, my parents invited Jana for Christmas dinner. She'd going to be there. Please inform me of your plans as soon as possible, so I can join you instead. Not really. I honestly think we're going to get back together. Wow, it sounds dumb as I write it. Have a Happy Christmas, if I don't write again before then, and make sure you eat all your vegetables. Love, Jens. Robbe hastily scrawled a reply and sent it right back: Jens, I never have any plans. You can come whenever you want to. Love, Robbe.

Around dinnertime on the fourth day, Robbe walked back into the hallway and down to the kitchen, where his mother poured hot chocolate powder in two mugs. She dumped a can of soup into a pot and set it to simmer on the burner, stirring occasionally, while she microwaved a measuring cup of water. Something rammed into the window at full force, startling her into dropping her spoon.

She put a hand on her forehead as if checking for fever. “Robbe, what was that?”

“Owl, Mom,” said Robbe. He tried not to be frustrated with her. There was just so much on his plate, and he wasn’t supposed to be here, because he was supposed to be with Sander at school. If Sander was doing okay.

Robbe’s mother had never gotten the hang of a magical household. Robbe didn’t have the right to be bitter about it.

“Should I open the window?” she asked.

“Yeah.”

His mother slid the window open. A barn owl flapped into the apartment building, despite their landlord’s explicit animal-of-any-kind prohibition. It landed on top of their refrigerator and ruffled its brown and white feathers. Clutched in its beak was a folded piece of parchment, tied with a long twine thread, sealed with a stamp of red wax. Robbe recognized the owl from the Hogwarts owlery. They were general-use.

He jumped up to take the note. Jens did not usually send two owls in one day. Aaron’s owl was white.

“I’ll never get used to that,” said his mother as the owl flew back out the window. An alarm on her cell phone beeped several times. “Oh, pills. I’ll be right back.” She rushed into the foyer.

Robbe surveyed the apartment in her absence. A sprig of mistletoe hung over the space connecting the kitchen to the living room. Several wrapped presents rested beneath the tree, one or two with his name in brightened cursive that he could see from this far away. He spotted the special picture ornament he made for his mother when he was little, the photograph of her and him riding on a swing in a public park. They used to get along.

He looked down at the paper in his hands and broke the seal.

There were no words written. Only a telephone number. Jens and Aaron did not have phones in their houses; muggle technology was useless in areas permeated with magic. Moyo owned one for clout purposes, sometimes, and this could be him—except, he did not use the school’s owls if he could help it. He borrowed from Jens.

That left one person who might want to contact Robbe.

“Alright, soup,” said his mother, reentering the kitchen. “Tonight, I was thinking we should catch up on TV. Honestly, I don’t know how you survive without it at Hogwarts.”

“There are other things to do,” said Robbe.

“Maybe, but not as exciting.” She took the soup pot from the burner and poured it into two bowls, which she then carried into the living room. They stored a small folding table under the couch. She set it up like a coffee table and left their bowls there. If they had any class, they might have the money to afford something made of wood, at least.

“Can I actually—” Robbe began. He gestured to the phone number.

“You’re spending your quality time with me,” said his mother. She patted the spot beside her on the couch. “C’mon. I’ve been recording everything. Oh, hang on.” She waited until he sat down to lean over. “What’s been going on at school. Tell me all about it. You never write.”

“You never got used to owls.”

“That’s an awful reason.”

“Nothing important happens,” he assured her. “I’d write if it mattered.”

“Nothing? No one special?”

“No, Mom, nothing you’d want to hear about.”

“You know I don’t believe that,” she said. “Handsome boy like you.” But she sat back and turned on the television. Christmastime here was TV shows, silence, dancing around one another. This was why Robbe would’ve liked to stay on campus with Sander, when Sander still wanted him there. If Sander ever wanted him there. They watched three whole episodes of Call the Midwife without saying a single word to each other.

Robbe’s mother was a good person. He knew she was a good person. She tried so hard to be things for him, to be involved in his life. He understood her illness wasn’t her fault at a basic level. He understood that he was wrong to be angry about an innocent, poking question that any parent would have likely posed.

But there was a part of him missing that she couldn’t give back after she’d taken it. What kind of parent leaves their fourteen-year-old in the house to care for everything while she lies in bed all summer? What kind of parent—

There was someone special, there was Sander. Sander and his mother were apart because they needed to be, because school and home did not mix.

Robbe rose from the couch during the credits of the third and motioned apologetically to his mother. He pointed toward the bathroom. On the way there, he snatched her phone from the kitchen counter. His fingers shook as he dialed the number.

Someone picked up on the second ring. “I just got home,” said Robbe. He didn’t know why he felt so bad about not calling sooner.

“You got my letter,” said Sander. Robbe’s heart turned into a dozen origami butterflies. He tried to catch them in a net and stomp them underfoot.

“Owls are cool,” Robbe said.

“How are you?”

“I’m good. How are you?”

“Good.”

The line went silent. Was that it? Did Sander send a whole-ass latter to hear Robbe’s voice for two seconds? Kind of romantic, yes, but it didn’t do anything to fix anything. Robbe couldn’t reconcile the way Sander spoke to him with the way Sander acted around him, the way Sander acted around other people.

This could have been their time. Two whole weeks of kissing, or whatever it was couples did went they were unsupervised.

“Listen,” said Sander. “I’ve been thinking.” His sentences took on a sort of pregnant quality, as if each contained multitudes more within it. Sander was fighting down dozens of others to say each one.

“About what?”

“About, um, you. I guess.” Sander cleared his throat. “You really liked me?”

“I guess so.”

“How is—how’s your mother?”

Robbe didn’t know where something like that would come from. “She’s fine for now. We’re watching Call the Midwife.”

Sander’s laugh sounded forced. “My mother likes that too. Is it… not good to be there?”

“Well, she hasn’t drowned me in a bathtub yet. You sound like you have something to say.”

“I was thinking we could just—talk.”

What the hell was this? “Sander,” said Robbe, doing his very best to sound like a prefect. “It was a Christmas card. If you have something to say—” He tried to channel the voice Jens used when he was disappointed after a Quidditch match, the kind of steely cool that could only come from a place of care. As it was, he knew Sander could hear the hope festering beneath his skin. He wants to tell me he loves me.

“I—I don’t have anything to say,” said Sander, but it was an obvious lie.

“Then I’ll hang up.” Robbe braced himself against the bathroom counter. Polished marble reflected his face almost as clearly as the mirror ahead. “I said I didn’t want to be friends. I can’t handle being friends yet.”

“No, don’t hang up.”

“Any more questions about Mom?”

Sander’s breath caught. “You don’t like me.”

“Not this again.”

“No, really, you don’t.” Sander spoke faster. “You said so. I don’t know, when it was fake, I thought—” He coughed. “I can’t go back to nothing.”

“I said I liked you,” said Robbe. “You don’t make any sense.”

“Yes, but—”

“Did you really send an owl back to talk me out of a crush? Or are you in love with my mom?”

“No, I—”

“Good.” Robbe knocked his toothbrush cup off the sink, sending it clattering to the floor. He heard his mother shifting around in the living room, poised to come check on him any minute. This conversation would have to end sooner rather than later. “I have to go. If you’ve still got something, spit it out.”

There were a few seconds of silence. Robbe could hear the beginnings of a sentence several times, nothing quite reaching the air.

“Okay,” he said. “Goodbye.” He tapped the end button. That might have been a little harsh, yes, but it was Christmas. The couch and Call the Midwife awaited. He rejoined his mother in the living room, leaving her cell phone plugged into its charger beside their toaster.

They watched another whole episode. It pained him to think of her loitering about the house while he was gone, rearranging the cabinets and recording television shows, even if he hated the thought of staying with her more. He didn’t get Sander’s interest… come to think of it, Sander was concerned about her during their make-out session in the workshop.

The phone started ringing.

“I’ve got it,” said Robbe, before his mother could get off the couch. This time, he took it all the way to his bedroom and locked the door to answer it.

Sander was quieter this time. “You called the number.”

“It would have been rude not to. You didn’t sign it. It could have been anybody.”

“You knew who it was.”

There wasn’t much to say to that, so Robbe waited instead of responding. Sander filled the gap after a while, in something even smaller than a whisper, something that sent shivers down Robbe’s spine. “I miss you.” A whistle sounded somewhere in the distance.

Too much. Ugh, why did Robbe think he could handle something like this? He did what he always did when Sander was involved: he was honest. “Look, you don’t make any sense to me. I hear from Noor that you’re head-over-heels in love with me, I hear from you that you’re back with Britt. Well, you’re not, so I’m hearing you’re a liar, too.” Robbe bit his lip to keep from getting choked up. “We barely even had anything, Sander, but I loved every second. You can’t keep pulling on my strings, okay? I can’t handle it.”

“I don’t mean to be pulling,” said Sander. Something ruffled against the receiver. “Your mother, though, she—”

“Good, then don’t bother calling again unless you have something new to tell me. Goodbye.” Robbe smashed the end button this time, scratching the screen protector with his nail. He promised himself he’d fix it later, provided no one got him trouble for his magical Christmas card to Sander.

Back into the living room. His mother lay down across all the cushions and monopolized the space. She pulled a crocheted blanket across her legs, her eyes glassy as she stared at the TV. Robbe flashed back to his worst year again—getting up for school and seeing her there, unmoving.

The last Christmas they spent together, her medication mixture made her violently ill at the slightest hint of indigestion. That could happen this year, it could. There was too much going on in Robbe’s life to deal with her right now.

They’d make blueberry pancakes together. She’d microwave soup for dinner. This was his life.

The phone screen lit up once more with an incoming call from the number as before. Robbe let it ring out. Another came. When he let that ring, another. He answered on Sander’s fifth attempt.

“Please don't hang up this time. Your mother is sick,” blurted Sander on the other end, almost as if he read Robbe’s mind. If his speech was unhinged earlier, now it was a runaway train. “She’s sick and you hate her and I’m sick so you’ll hate me. That was it.” He took a deep breath and the phone line crackled—Hogwarts wouldn’t have the best reception, would it? “I have liked you for forever, okay? That’s my something new.”

Wow. Okay. What the fuck.

“What?” managed Robbe.

“That’s what I needed to say. Before. You don’t like me because you can’t. It has to be over because it can’t ever happen.” Sander’s voice lowered. “I thought it might hurt you less if you knew. But I also can't sit around and pretend that nothing's wrong.”

Robbe rehashed every conversation they ever had in a second. He did not talk about his mother much in any of those—he tried to keep her out of it. She frustrated him to no end. Her stupid pills, the stupid genetics that doomed him to a future of dealing with the same problems, his stupid father walking out. If it wasn’t for her, everything would be fine. But he didn’t—he didn’t hate her.

Why would Sander think he hated her? What was going on?

The library, the offhand comment on Lexapro. The workshop, how he said he didn’t want to return to her because she’d ruin Christmas. The way he referred to her on his and Sander’s second astronomy tower rendezvous: “sick in the head.” Every little thought he had about her.

“It was always going to be like this,” said Sander. Wind blew against his end of the phone; Robbe had to strain to hear most of the words. “I thought when it was fake, it could be okay, because, well, you know, but then you kissed me and I just—There’s no hiding it forever, is there? It's got to come out.”

“What did you say about my mom?” Robbe demanded.

“I stopped it because it isn't what you want.”

More than that. Britt came to Robbe in the astronomy tower with a slip of paper and a warning of sorts—He isn’t going to tell you. And what had Willem said to his friends, when Sander was asleep the day after they kissed? Was that something that just happened? Were there times that Willem couldn’t wake Sander up?

Robbe knew what that meant. Britt’s voice echoed in his head. It’s hard to tell between what he wants and what’s a symptom. He’d thought it controlling at the time, and it was, but he also understood the feeling. When you loved someone, you wanted to keep them safe. Robbe was a certified idiot. Puzzle pieces falling into place.

Sander did not slow down. “You were going to stay here with me to avoid being there with her. But we’re the same. We’ve always been the same. It’s bipolar, Robbe, and it’s fine that you don’t want it. What matters is that I can’t live with nothing from you, okay? We can’t just not talk.”

Robbe’s hand went numb from gripping the phone so hard.

“I don’t want you to hate me. I don’t want you to hate me like you hate your mom.”

“I don’t hate my mom,” said Robbe. “I won’t hate you—don’t hate you.” He felt bewildered, standing in the middle of his living room, with this crisis happening a whole train ride away. What the fuck was going on? His mother raised her eyebrow at him from her position on the couch.

“You do, you said so. And you’d hate me. I didn’t want to upset you, I didn’t—” Something in the background blared, loud enough to mask the rest of Sander’s sentence. Wind? Rain?

“Where are you?” Robbe asked. Britt’s piece of paper—what did it say? He should have taken the time to set it aside, stupid stupid stupid—

“This was stupid,” said Sander, suddenly even more rushed. “I’m sorry. I should have sent another letter. I let Jens talk me into it—” Robbe waved his wand in the general direction of his bedroom—the Ministry of Magic could expel him for underage sorcery—and summoned Britt’s paper. Still a mess of cursive lines. Still blurry.

His mother made a face like, is everything okay? He nodded back.

“I’m putting too much on you,” Sander continued on the phone. “I don’t want to be another thing you have to worry about. That’s why it has to be over. We’re over. But I don’t want to never hear from you again. That’s not what I want.”

“Are you alright?” Robbe whispered.

“I’m fine. I’m, out--” Sander sounded a million miles away in a snowstorm. The end of the sentence got lost. "Moyo and Jens said you'd be here, and free, so...I'm in love with you. This is my something new." The line clicked dead, although Robbe couldn't tell if it was Sander's decision to end the call or fate had intervened. His arms dropped to his sides, the phone to the floor. Something sounded at the door to the apartment. A knock? Robbe remained rooted to the spot.

There wasn't a list he could put together for this situation. He did not hate his mother. Sometimes he hated her. He hated what her disorder did to her. He hated coming home and finding her somewhere, not doing anything, holding a glass of water without the will to bring it to her lips. He hated having to search all the cabinets for bowls when she reorganized their kitchen at three in the morning. Everything he said to Sander, he meant. Everything about her. That could be number one on the list. Number two, he loved Sander. Sometimes he convinced himself he didn't. He thought of his mother wasting away on their couch, lying about taking her pills, camping out on the bathroom floor during rough weeks. Home and school were supposed to be separate. He did not want to think of Sander throwing up blueberry pancakes after taking a handful of pills. He didn't know what he was supposed to do. He needed time to think.

The knocking came again, harder. Robbe walked over as if in a dream, barely touching the floor. He vaguely remembered Jens saying something in his letter about visiting, though this seemed short notice. He only said yes to the proposition because he knew Jens would never actually make good on the offer. Robbe opened the door to Sander, hair ruffled, eyes wild. Fucking Sander. What the fuck. Sander's brown roots were more visible than the bleach blond, even though they did not seem to be any longer. He wore the same leather jacket as their first date wrapped tight around his shoulders. In one hand, he held Moyo's broomstick— Robbe could recognize it by the scrapes on the wood. He had the same look on his face that he had that night in the dormitories when he was drunk and reaching out for Robbe. This wasn't happening. What the hell was happening?

"We need to talk to each other," said Sander, without pause for breath. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you about everything, and I'll ruin anything else, I know I will, but you have to tell me we can."

#sobbe fanfic #wtfock #sander driesen #robbe ijzermans #hogwarts au #fake dating #requested fic

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ravenaveira · 4 years

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Ok, time for my review of Kh3 Re:Mind Dlc

This is gonna be long, so be prepared, and yes there will be many spoilers so if you dont want spoilers of the game then you probably shouldnt read this, but if you dont care then stick around.

I will start off with my unbiased and critical opinion.

From the title menu alone you already know what this game is gonna be about. Kairi is gonna be center focus, or should say specifically Sokai, and Riku will be virtually non existent.

Now I know what your thinking, well duh its all about saving Kairi of course Riku wont have that big a role and she’ll be the main focus, and to that I say no shit sherlock I already knew that. My issue isnt that it was Kairi focused because I already knew that and still pre-ordered the DLC, but my issue is what this title screen represents and my fears were proven correct.

Let me elaborate

Riku is just as much of a friend to Sora as Kairi is, from the beginning of the series its always been Sora, Riku, and Kairi, thats the way its ALWASY been. But from this title screen I could tell Riku’s bond with them wasnt gonna be present at all and I was right.

I’ll elaborate further

I know Im jumping way ahead here but bare with me, at the end of the game after Sora rescues Kairi they travel the worlds together, Sora notices he is fading away which is why he goes to the many different worlds he has visited but now with Kairi, spending his final moments with her before he finally disapears.

See the problem? Sora doesnt involve Riku at all in his final moments being alive, he is just completely absent during his entire remaining life. Sora only spends time with Kairi during his final moments, Riku wasnt shown with them once.

I know some people say well we dont know how long Sora was alive before vanishing and he was probably the one who organized the party, but did we see that though? did we see any signs that Sora was alive for more than a day or two? did we see Sora talking to anyone like he was setting anything up? NO, it was all about Kairi and Riku was completely forgotten.

I can understand if Sora wasnt dying then it wouldnt matter how much time he spends with Kairi alone, but Sora was fading away ANY SECOND and he didnt spend any of his remaining time with Riku at all, even at the beach party who is Sora sitting next to alone with before he finally vanishes? Kairi. That is inexcusable and a huge insult to Riku and his bond with Sora, hes just completely excluded, that is unforgivable.

These new added scenes to the ending actually made it worse than the original version of it, before we didnt even know Sora was around for more than a day and just assumed they all had a beach party afterwards to celebrate getting everyone back and saving the world, but now we know Sora was actually around for an extended period of time and made no effort to spend time with anyone other than Kairi, not even his best friend Riku did he spend time with for his final hours, that is despicable.

Another major issue is how Sora keeps saying his journey started with losing Kairi in this game, as if Riku wasnt ALSO lost that day, as if Riku wasnt the reason Sora kept on his journey even after saving Kairi and sending her back to Destiny Islands, as if he didnt fall to his knees and bawl his eyes out finally reuniting with him, as if he wasnt content with spending the rest of his life trapped in the Realm of Darkness with Riku, as if for the entirety of the base game of kh3 Sora wasnt constantly and only thinking about Riku and how many things he wished he could show him.

Apparently in Remind none of that happened, none of that mattered, it was Kairi that was his main motivation, it was Kairi that started his journey, Riku wasnt involved in it at all.

That is a huge issue with this DLC, it treats Riku like a side character and of little importance to Sora, in the base game they handled them fine minus that on instance in the Keyblade Graveyard where Sora says ‘Alone, Im worthless’ even though Riku’s right there but other than that their relationship and bond was handled very well but in Remind? practically non existent.

Now onto the story aspect, if your not into time travel and have trouble understanding the many variations of it then your gonna have a bad time because it gets VERY confusing to follow, which is why you should never introduce time travel because it becomes way too complicated to keep track of and not only that you also have to worry about things like paradoxes, ripples in time, alternate timelines etc. Its a complete clusterfuck to keep up with and manage so time travel really shouldnt have been introduced in this series.

Chirithy tells Sora that no matter what he cant change the past again, yet there are times where Sora does just that so exactly what cant he change? for example, when Roxas appears he asks Sora to do him a favor which is essentially getting the X back from Xemnas in their names. Sora does several things to make this happen and even Kairi gets a couple swings at Xemnas this time but then the two of them are basically caught and restrained inside shadow balls [pause]

See the prob? this is a huge change to that fight, Kairi never took a single swing at Xemnas, she just stood there and got snatched up, Roxas never asked Sora for help getting the X’s back from Xemnas, and Sora and Kairi never got restrained by Xemnas and knocked out.

Chirithy explicitly said Sora cant change what happened and no matter what he has to accept it for what it is, yet here he is, changing what happened. Maybe you could argue well this is an alternate timeline, even if it is that makes all of this irrelevant and means it never happened because the true ending is the one where it didnt happen, making this semi useful Kairi moment really pointless because at the end of the day its not canon, her being useless is the true outcome, none of this matters.

That is extremely disappointing, so even if you alter the past for the better it doesnt matter because its an alternate timeline and that timeline isnt the real one making this whole redo pointless and time consuming for a short DLC that was an extra 30$ to play.

So the time travel is very confusing and even if you follow it, it ends up being very disappointing when you realize none of it matters.

Moving on to some of the tied loose ends, Im glad they explained why Aqua froze up after saying ‘We stand together’ and I like how we get to see how Young Xehanort came to have the beliefs that lead to what he did and also MOMs subtle influence on him succumbing to darkness.

He told Xehanort that he would outgrow the robe and no longer need it because if he was truly powerful then he’d be the one controling the darkness, this leads to Xehanort later begining to travel without the robe and being corrupted. So we know now that MOM also influenced that as well and is very sketchy, even more now than he was before since this action greatly influenced what Xehanort eventually does and all the pain he caused, all of which would have probably never happened if it wasnt for him.

But thats just my theory and what I got from it.

I liked that we got to see Namine for a brief moment where Sora basically brushes her off and completely forgets about thanking her, this is a plotline Im pretty sure at this point is just never going to get resolved. He just tells her to go to the Final World and walks off, which makes no sense because Sora was surprised to see her in the original playthrough.

Another change was Lingering Will dying to protect Sora, again this never happened because Sora was busy fighting alongside everyone in the maze while Lingering Will and Terranort were fighting away from them. After Lingering Will died for him then Sora is pretty much squeezed to death by Terranorts Stand, or atleast knocked unconscious.

So much about these are just so confusing as to how they are happening when Chirithy said the events couldnt be changed I just stopped questioning it.

But atleast this time its made clear that Namine is the one who sent Lingering Will to help everyone and how she did it, so now people can stop saying Kairi is the reason everyone survived because it wasnt, without Lingering Will they would have all died a second time.

Basically the first half of the DLC is just recap with some minor changes and additions to the cutscenes, you get to play as other characters like Riku [optional] Aqua [not optional] and Roxas [optional] but other than that its basically the same thing all over again for the first 3-4 hours of the DLC, that is ridiculous.

The new content finally starts when Kairi is shattered, funny how the game gets good after Kairi dies xD I’ll stop.

Anyway once Kairi dies is when we finally get explorable Scala, but not without having to endure an insane fight with tons of heartless and nobodies and yes its more complicated than you think. It doesnt matter how many heartless or nobodies you kill, they will keep coming until you kill this one red heartless with way more health than your average heartless has.

After that you can pretty much wander around Scala as you wish and this is the only time where you can buy items or food so make sure to do that if your low on items. If your low on money there are minor enemies there that you can kill to get some so take advantage of this opportunity because your not getting another one.

Your goal in Scala is to basically run around, solve a couple puzzles, and get 5 of Kairi’s heart shards, revealed to having to be 7 later on. Sound fun? besides being able to see more of Scala’s layout, not really. But its a good place to take a breather before getting back into the big battles ahead.

Unfortunately your actually forced to fight the armored organization again but thankfully you dont have to do the ENTIRE final battle over, just that one section which I appreciate but wish we didnt have to do any of it at all.

So after we’re done Scala we get in MY opinion the two best parts of the entire DLC. We get to see what was going on with the rest of the keyblade wielders back home and it was INSANE and extremely well done, everybody had a chance to shine.

When everyone was swept away and Mickey was down and out, it was amazing seeing Mickey push himself back up and slowly with what little strength he had take on all the armor organization BY HIMSELF severely weakened, yet still powerful enough to hold them off and stand his ground. He really showed us WHY he is the King, so THAT I really enjoyed. It was extremely well done and one of the most memorable parts of the DLC.

The next part was even more insane and well done, which is us getting to fight as all the keyblade wielders against the armored organization and even get some cool dialog and team attacks in between, it was just amazingly well done seeing everyone work together and switching between characters was just so epic and enjoyable.

Honestly I could play those two parts over and over again and enjoy it everytime, their just that good and the most memorable in the entire DLC.

Coming back with Kairi and killing Xehanort together with all the keyblade wielders including Kairi this time was satisfying to see but it excludes Xehanorts and Eraquses final words, I mean yea seeing Xehanort have a semi happy ending put off alot of people but at the same time, seeing Xehanort come to the realization that he was wrong about everything and giving the Wayfinder trio closure by seeing their master one last time and hearing his apology to them just held more weight to me.

Im not saying I think Xehanort should be redeemed as easily as he was, but I feel like excluding Eraqus and their final words made the ending feel hollow, just ok we beat the bad guy, happily ever after now. Thats pretty lackluster and unsatisfying In my opinion.

Finally the ending....

Heres where Im gonna be biased and give my personal thoughts. Warning if your a fan of Kairi skip to the very end of the review where I give my overall rating

I hate the ending, for the reasons I listed in the beginning but also many others. I get the main focus was gonna be Kairi since the DLC was about saving her, Im not mad about the obvious, Im mad about the execution.

The Sokai agenda was so forced and apparent its not even funny, they shove it in your face so hard yet when Sora is talking with Chirithy he still refers to Kairi as a friend, really? your shoving this pairing down our throats just to have Sora still friendzone her? Im not mad because I dont want them together anyway but I hate the games being played here, you either want them together or you dont, pick a friggin side Nomura.

And while we’re on the subject, I hate, HATE, how this game is so heavily romance focused when Kingdom Hearts was NEVER about romance to begin with, it was always about friendship and bonds. Not in this DLC though, no now its all about Kairi and being with her forever, traveling the world together, holding hands, all this lovey dovey nonsense nobody invested in the plot could give a rats behind about.

Sure people who are into Kingdom Hearts for the romance of course they dont mind, but Im pretty sure MOST people invested in this series are in it for the story, not some stupid pairing, and I HATE how much they shove it down your throat because it is just so forced and obvious what they were doing.

This was all damage control for Kairi, who has been a useless damsel in distress and dues ex machina in every single game shes been a part of. I repeat, EVERY SINGLE GAME SHES A PART OF.

Kh1 - Kidnapped, unconscious, Sora needs to die to save her.

Kh2 - Kidnapped, held hostage, Sora needs to find and save her.

Kh3 - Kidnapped, unconscious, is killed twice, Sora needs to die to save her.

Do you see what I fricken mean? Every fuckin game its the same danm thing over and over and quite frankly Im sick of it. You might as well say this is a Mario game because Kairi is princess Peach always gettin snatched up and Sora is Mario always going through insanely deadly trials to get her back, and then it happens all over again.

This DLC was damage control for that, instead of immediately getting snatched up by Xemnas she actually gets a few good swipes at him to no avail of course, and then she fights together with Sora against armored Xehanort, all of which is just damage control for her not doing anything in the entire franchise and pandering to her fanbase that are constantly screeching for playable Kairi and for her to do something.

It was also damage control for how non existent their relationship was and what a joke its been since Kh1. They arent fooling anybody because thats exactly what this was, otherwise why you have to try so hard to CONVINCE us how important she was to Sora? why did Riku have to get sidelined so much just to boost Kairi up? why’d Sora completely disregard Riku as a part of his journey? why did Sora not spend ANY time with ANYONE for his final moments alive? its so obvious why. The only way to convince anyone shes actually important and relevant is to play down everyone else or exclude them entirely.

Congratulations, you got your wish, good for you fandom, but at what cost?

The time they spent forcing so much Sokai could have been used to tie up way more loose ends than there were but nope, gotta squeeze in that Sokai, thats what yall really here for right? fuck off.

The two best moments of the game was so short lived its not even funny, this DLC was full of so much padding in the first half, forced romance and pandering for damage control they forgot to actually make this a decent DLC.

Since I recorded my gameplay from start to finish I can actually tell you the amount of old content vs the new

3-4 hours of mostly what we already seen with a few changes, I only died twice

1-2 hours of new content, probably less because I got lost and died alot

That is unacceptable, 30$ for only 10% new content? that is a robbery.

Not only that but the worst part is the Limitcut episode, databattles have always been optional for competative players who like the challenge. Now you are FORCED to fight these INSANELY hard bosses, all 13 in order to get the final bits of the aftermath of the story.

WE PAID FOR THIS, this wasnt free we PAID for it and yet we’re basically told ‘Hey if your a casual player and want the rest of the story? well you gotta fight 13 of these insanely hard databattles that used to be optional but now their madatory for you to get the rest of your moneys worth. Too difficult? cant do it? well too danm bad, get good or go home we got your money already so screw you guess you’ll never know’

That is a fucking robbery and a huge slap in the face to people who are invested in the story, not proving their the best by fighting insanely difficult battles no matter what difficulty your on. It wouldnt be an issue if this was always the case, but these battles were always OPTIONAL for competetive players to do if they WANTED to, but now its mandatory and if you cant do it then oh well middle finger to you.

I couldnt even beat Vanitas, I fought him first and then Luxord and I couldnt beat either of them so I just said fuck it and went on youtube to see what I paid to see for free. 30$ wasted on a game I cant even finish, your out of your fucking mind if you think thats fair and excusable.

Thats why at the end of the day I give it a 5/10, its not good but its not bad either, its just decent. But if you asked me if it is worth the time and money? fuck no, my advice? watch other youtubers play it and keep your 30$

If you want it just to play as some of the characters, experience the new content for yourself, and play the databattles then by all means get it.

But if you think thats not enough for you to spend 30$ for then dont get it.

Overall Re:mind gets a 5/10, useless padding for majority of the first half of things we’ve already seen and cant skip because theres new scenes mixed in, forced romance that nobody but shippers care to see, severely lacking new content, and unfair extremely hard mandatory databattles just to see the final aftermath of the story which is kind of important setup for the next game.

Fuck this DLC, this was my fist time EVER buying a DLC for ANYTHING and thanks to this its probably my last. So thank you Re:Mind, for ReMinding me why I never bought DLCs in the first place.

Ps - Im so glad playable Kairi was optional, thats one of the only things this DLC did right.

#kh3 remind spoilers #kh3 #kingdom hearts 3 #anti-sokai #anti-kairi

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reddogf13 · 4 years

Text

Escape: To Salvation Ch: 15

Blake X Val

Summery: Blake wakes up in the hell town known as Templegate. confused and alone he must fight through both his past and present for his future. however, hallucinations of festering demons haunt him along with something else more of mortal blood. now he must fight to keep his nightmares and reality separate or succumb to the deadly wilds. however is he truly as alone as he feels in this world?

status: complete

rated: M - fowl language, sensitive topics, and gore

previous chap: Escape: To Salvation CH:14

next chap: Escape: To Salvation CH:16

_____________________________________

~Ch:15 Admission~

Blake woke up in a wheezing gasping fit for air. Getting the attention from Val at the entrance over him panicking. “oh god. … how long was I out?” he asked between breaths. “only a few hours.” she answered. “dammit.” he breathed, getting frustrated. The increasing migraine and all around feeling of being ill making it all the worse. He's only dealt with this for a few days. The thought of suffering this for years being unimaginable to him. “No wonder everything went to shit so suddenly in these woods.” he thought as he caught his breath. “... deliverance … what a joke.” he mumbled, remembering the last bit of his dream. Looking back to the entrance toward Val. Seeing her again staring out toward the trees. “i can take over if you want to sleep.” he offered. “no.” she stated. “you should sleep.” he pressed a little. “i know.” she snapped. “... do you see something?” he asked. Seeing Val not taking her eyes away from whatever she stared at. He was given no answer to the question. “ … are you afraid?”he asked, thinking on how she was suffering the same as him. Maybe even seeing hallucinations just like he did before. “ I am not afraid of them.” she stated, barely heard by Blake. “do you … feel something else? … like what you mentioned in Templegate?” he asked awkwardly. Trying to avoid the creepy subject of lust. “no!” she snapped with a glare toward him. Her tone heavy with a sense of disgust as what he mentioned. “... is it the kids? … your notes say that's when the nightmares came.” he asked. “ … it was only on those ending days I got the nightmares. I felt I had to leave … but I was still stupidly naive about faith … about Knoth. I stayed and so did everybody else. I stayed … “ Val hesitantly started, finding it difficult to speak by the end. Stopping to take a few breaths before she started up again. “i stayed because of my kids … not blood … but I took care of them just the same. … they were my only happiness in that disgusting town. … then that dreaded day came. Knoth made an announcement that god warned him of that stupid illusion. The antiChrist inhabiting a kid. even the already born weren't safe to harbor. … he said they all had to go. They would be safer up above in heaven. ... They bought my comforting words of going to paradise. In a way i am sure I bought them to, to help feel better. The days leading up we prepared them all. Keeping them passive like sheep when you line them up in the slaughterhouse. It rallied everyone up through fear. We all waited and now it finally seemed like the end was on the doorstep. Knoth had me go first in front of every other parent in line. Only me … all of them … in two days … then it was over. Then the next parent and their children went. After that I was congratulated like a saint. … but I didn't feel like one. The nightmares came, getting worse each night … tried speaking to Knoth, as if he could sweep all the pain away.” a pained laughed coming out on the last sentience. “... i tried speaking with others. Knoth didn't like that at all. … only followers of the enemy would feel guilt. … the nightmares are to punish the wicked … only a heretic would hate following the lord's word. He went on and on about my negative thinking. The others stopped speaking to me, I was shunned besides a few others. They were parents as well with the visions of killing their children. We made that secret place by the lake shore to talk. If nightmares were to punish us, why were we praised after the deed we were commanded to do for the lord? That didn't go on long before I finally had enough of knoths voice speaking through those hanging radios. I left with a group of others determined to make him feel all the pain I did those last few days. I was going to become everything he hated, everything he didn't want me to be. I would bring to earth his worst fear just so I could know he would suffer. Even in the mines I could still hear the radios. Him announcing that he knew I was a sinner all along, going to work for the enemy. From that point he was looked at like a god who could see everything. All the greater the insult toward my old loyalty to the town.” she finished. Taking deep breaths to hold herself together. “i see my kids out there. … between the trees asking why. … but I can't answer why because no answers I can think of feel good enough to tell them.” she spoke, quickly wiping away some tears building up. “... there was nothing you could do. … Knoth would have had someone kill them if you refused. He wouldn't have had them be merciful about the killings either. It would have been impossible to run with over 40 kids into the forest. Knoth was already distrustful of you due to that voice in his head.” Blake tried removing some of her guilt. “... what are your nightmares?” she asked. “... a monster … from when I was young … he was a father like Knoth. he hurt someone I deeply cared for. I knew something was wrong, but I was too late to save her. I had to relive it so multiple people could help me. In the end it's like I never said anything. He got away with it all like he committed a small mistake.” he answered. “where's your monster now?” she asked. “don't know. Hopefully dead if he's not locked up for something else.” he spoke, a numb sensation washing over him about the subject. “let's hope that both our monsters are dead.” she breathed. “i am going to take a walk.” she spoke with a tired voice. “your not going to run again are you?” Blake asked. Val pausing a few steps away from the entrance. “maybe it's better if we separate.” she spoke with a melancholy tone. Blake started quietly at Vals facing back. “wed have to separate at some point.” he thought for a brief moment. “we can at least stay together till we reach the city limits.” he spoke. “hesitating on going our ways is going to bring trouble. It's a mistake to keep this going any longer.” she stated. “why?” he reflexively asked. “why?! Why do you think why?!” she snapped in frustration toward him. “this wont work. Drop it!” she added on. Turning forward to walk off into the darkness. “if you don't come back i'll come looking for you!” he shouted as Val left his sight. “hesitation is a mistake.” he barely heard her speak from the darkness. “... now what?” he thought. He didn't want to sleep for the rest of the night. Val went off, leaving him alone for who knows how long. “guess I should make plans for when we actually get to the town. … when I … get to the town.” he thought, looking down to the gravel mixed dirt. “should still have tons of money in my bank account. Take some out, get a hotel, real food. Call FBI however I can to expose Murkoff out here. Let FBI take over from there and that's about it.” Blake summed up in his mind. “...” he sat there in the quiet darkness, already getting nervous about where Val headed off to. “if she did leave, the longer I wait the more of a head start she has before I go looking. Should I wait 5 minutes or 10 minutes? Should I go now? Even if I do go looking, and it turns out she does want to leave, what would I say? Should I really beg her to stay? Just outright say I want her to come with me?” he argued in thought. “lynn would never forgive me if I did bring her. After what she did. I should be the one wanting to leave not begging her to stay.” he thought, looking up from the ground to the sky. “just til we're out of the canyon. Then we go. … its set.” he mumbled to himself. Half of him accepting the time frame while the other half felt sick at knowing a clock was ticking down now. “why can't I be happy with any decision I make? I always second guess myself. I could have always said or done more when I look back. I'll get over it … someday.” he mumbled again. “it's probably been about 5 minutes. I should go find Val and tell her about it.” he said while rising to his feet. Grabbing the fur to roll up for travel. Using the night gun scope to follow footprints she left behind. Finding her not far seated on a rock at the river's edge. “you couldn't have waited for me?” she asked as Blake approached. “it's been 5 minutes.” he mumbled a little. “it's only been 2.” she informed. “oh, … well i am used to staring at a watch for time keeping.” he chuckled. Getting no response from Val as she stared down at the slow moving water. “i thought of when we can split. Once were out of the canyon. I can just follow the river alone the rest of the way. It shouldn't be that hard, right?” he spoke, trying to sound a little cheerful, expecting the same reaction from Val at hearing the news. “it shouldn't.” she spoke, barely above a whisper. Not sounding very excited by the news. Blake stood by watching her for any kind of reaction. Trying to figure out exactly what she was feeling at the moment. “what are you thinking about?” he simply decided to ask. Being unable to separate any idea of what Val felt. “all the things my mother said. Trying to find the best solution to my future decisions.” she answered. “any of it helpful?” he asked. “not for some decisions. Most of her talk was about survival. Doing anything to just survive, but not so much about actually living happily. I assume because there was no happiness to gain in Templegate, it was all about reaching the next day. She couldn't even smile at me till her illness came for fear of punishment. She was caring like any mother, at least as much as Knoth would allow. She wasn't allowed to feed me or help me if I was hurt. She was smart in how she went around him. Leaving perfectly good food out and telling me to get rid of it. She never told me specifically I could have it, or asked what I did with it. She never wanted to talk about any “missing” food either. Helping me with sickness by telling me stories on how others treated themselves.” Val spoke. “when she started getting sick she hid it. Shoving aside what Knoth said to teach me as much as she could before she'd get too sick. Half the subjects were not normally talked about till working age of 12 years. She wouldn't let me leave the kitchen table the entire day. Studying different plants till I could name them just by a single flower or leaf. During the night the subject changed to animals. Preparing meat, handling, basic farm care for all beasts. Letting me practice carving on small animals like snakes. After she was gone the adults claimed the house. Living space was running incredibly low and I found the forest more comfortable after that point. … its also empty. … very void of any contact.” she finished. A long silence filling the air between them. She stood from her rock to face him with an expression of indifference. “want to walk ahead?” she asked, gesturing toward half the canyon with an arm. “you should sleep.” he spoke with a caring tone. “i'll sleep when we reach the end.” she stated. “now who's avoiding sleep. You kept telling me to sleep when I refused.” he stated back to her. Gaining a glare from her as she wasn't in the mood for being scolded about it. Turning away from him to stare out at the tree line. “you still see the kids?” he asked. “no, they've been gone a few minutes now.” she answered. A loud bang echoed down the canyon. The two stopping there conversation to listen for anything else. There was no other sounds following the gunshot. No yelling, screaming, or any howls from a wolf. “what do you think that was for?” Blake asked. “misfire, my guess. That was really close.” Val answered. “wait … there down here, still?” Blake questioned. “yes, why wouldn't they be?” Val asked. “the waves have been hitting us here. That means they've been affected by it too.” he answered. “do you want to go look?” she asked. “yeah, come on.” he gestured for her to follow. Needing to use the night scope less and less as the bright moonlight slowly revealed from a moving cloud. The two sticking close together as they approached the directional origin of the noise. Every little moving branch of leaves having Blake stumble his pace. Each glance of movement looking like a grouping of those wall watchers staring down. He took multiple deep breaths to calm himself. Anxiety rising over the hallucinations getting worse. The moving shadows across the bark shifting to look like the pulsating meat. “don't, don't, not now.” he mumbled indistinguishably to himself. Fearing he would see it any second to hunt him from around a tree. He looked up at one strange shape in the trees. Panicking backwards with a gasp as he saw the twisted human outline. Seeing jagged teeth just below a pair of burning yellow eyes. Val grabbing his arm to stop him from going any further. The momentary contact having the hallucination smear away. But not all of the figure disappeared. The dark human shape remained in the tree. Splotches of moonlight broken by shadow branches waving over the form. “hanged himself.” Val stated as the two looked up at the body. A black wire going from his neck to a large branch. Blake looking away as he felt sick at the imagery. After swallowing his stomach down he continued forward. Gun at the ready if need be. After seeing that he wasint sure what else they'd find. Walking up to a camp that was empty of life. Only a small glow from a dead fire with burning embers left in its place. Destroyed tents that were shredded apart. Blood stains soiling the fabric down to a trail across the dirt. The bright red liquid leading to another body with a knife protruding from its neck. Another body off to the side with a branch slammed through there stomach. Embers surrounding a dark part of the wood from possibly being pulled from a once burning fire. “looks like they attacked each other.” Blake spoke out as he cautiously explored the camp of bodies. “val wait!” Blake exclaimed as he saw her going into a, still standing, blood covered tent. Running in and immediately seeing the sight he saw had him flinching back. Standing at the doorway to stare back into the wilderness. “there's the gun.” Val pointed toward the body holding the weapon toward a mangled head. Brains and blood splattered against the back of the tent aside from a large hole from the bullet exiting. “you should get out.” Blake spoke with a sickened groaned. Keeping his head turned away from the inside of the tent. “only looking for supplies.” Val said as she checked over the bodies pockets. Leaving empty handed when nothing but plastic wrappers came up. The gun being empty with no more ammo in sight. “why'd they get like this?” Blake mumbled to himself as he slowly wandered the camp again. “some handle their demons better than others. They had a hard time facing all of theirs just like many others i've seen.” Val answered, despite his question not aimed toward her. Her gaze directed up at the towering trees above. Blakes gaze following hers to a mass of dangling bodies above them. “committing every crime against humanity can weigh on your shoulders.” Blake bitterly spoke up at the bodies. “our path is clear now if they're all like this.” Val chuckled at the bodies. “lets take our chance while its available then.” Blake shivered off the creepy feeling of the surrounded freshly hanged looking down. “gets us to the end sooner.” Val breathed out. Her slightly happy demeanor dropping. Following along behind him. The sight of hanging bodies leaving a lasting impact as the hallucinations returned. Pulsating trees of flesh, bodies in the trees staring down on him. Visions of that monsters silhouette stalking him from the shadows. He breathed through the panic threatening to rise as his body tensed. Knuckles turning white from the death grip he had of the rifle. His deep breathing that so many therapists suggested turning more into hyperventilating. “blake-” Val barely got out before Blake nearly jumped out of his skin. He'd gotten so deep into his paranoia he forgot she was following. “... why so nervous?” she asked with a calm voice. “ … nightmares … they seem to follow me everywhere.” Blake hyperventilated to the point of wheezing. stopping when Val punched him in the arm. “stop breathing like that or your going to pass out.” Val scolded him. Blake getting a quick hold of his breathing after the pain. “what are you seeing?” she asked him with a serious tone. “that man … that monster ... following me.” he breathed out. “is that all?” she spoke as more of a statement then a question. “is that all.” Blake mocked her voice with growing irritation. Val letting out a small laugh at the mimic. “your monster isn't here. It can't touch you so you have nothing to be afraid of.” she spoke with confidence. “easy for you to say. You don't see some mangled monster of bloody parts with teeth like a saw blade.” he said while rubbing away a growing headache. “nightmares can't touch you, no matter how much they try to convince you otherwise. Don't allow them to waste your life away.” she said. Walking a few feet ahead of Blake. “yeah, when I feel my intestines being ripped out i'll remember that.” Blake mumbled behind her. “you should.” she said while continuing on. Her tone shifting to aggravation as Blakes breathing picked up again. “why do you keep doing that?” she asked, annoyed. “i was told to do it to help keep calm.” he breathed out quickly. “either you were told wrong or you're doing it wrong. Its not working for you.” she said back to him. “dancing would give you a better breathing pace at this point. Why don't you do that?” she asked. “i don't know how to dance.” he said. “you don't know how to dance?” she asked with a raised brow. “i rehearsed some dancing for a play … when I was young. … I haven't done it since.” he explained. “i can help show you.” Val smiled as she turned to look at him. Taking a few steps backwards before stopping. “where did you learn to dance?” Blake asked, suspicious as to what Val considered “dancing” in her mind. She might merely be thinking of something sexual for all he knew. “opposite sexes weren't allowed to be alone together unless married. Any courting had to be done in public. Dancing was the main thing for a while till eventually Knoth forced everyone to settle for someone. He wanted his flock to grow quickly and the courting got all in the way. Yet marriage still had to be done. Being a deacon I wasn't allowed to dance or court. It was considered a distraction of duty. However my kids wanted to learn how to dance, so I taught them.” she explained with a smile. “and how do you dance?” Blake asked, skeptical still. “let me show you.” Val smiled with her hand out. Blake hesitantly took her hand after a moments thought about it. “take both hands, face each other, and leave space-” he went in his mind when he rehearsed the dance. Letting out a breath of surprise when Val pulled him close against her. “just stay close and we'll both go slow this time for practice.” Val informed happily. “s-shouldn't we leave room for Jesus?” Blake stuttered a little. The Jesus thing being a common subject in school to remind kids about space. without exactly going into details why close contact wasn't allowed. They even made sure by sticking a ruler between the middle space of the two dancers. “he can find his own dance.” she teasingly joked over Blakes words. “just follow me and take a step.” she spoke while slowly leading Blake for the first step. Blake letting out a nervous breath after doing so. “see, your breathing is better already.” she spoke with a smile as she lead him slowly further into the steps. “think so?” he spoke out nervously. Heart shooting up into his throat as his leg hit a branch, sending both falling to the ground. Blake letting out a groan of pain while Val laughed. “you dance pretty good for someone who doesn't. Just need to watch your steps better.” she smiled while getting up. Helping Blake up when she was standing. “i do better on actual floor then shifting dirt.” he hissed while wiping away some gravel embedded into his back. “i bet you do.” she said with her happy tone dying again. “shall we continue?” she asked, continuing on before he could give an answer. “why does she change so much?” he thought on Vals shifting between happy and just neutral traveling. The rest of the travel continuing on without another word to each other. Blake looking up at the clear sky changing from night to sunrise. Watching as the stars slowly disappeared. Everything feeling so much better past the canyon. Fresh air helping to clean the migraine he developed with the night terrors. The canyon clearing to a open forest space filled with trees under the morning orange glow. Morning frost around the river melting away. Birds singing between the trees with a few chased away by squirrels. The forest becoming more and more healthy the farther they got. Blake was about to ask how many more days till they reach the town, now that they were out of he canyon. Remembering it was no longer a traveling for the both of them. He went against asking anything. Preferring to follow her as long as she seemed to allow. Deep inside he had to accept something past his denial. “ … how many days. Now that w- … the canyons past?” he asked, avoiding the word we. “following the river to a waterfall will be two days walking. Climbing down into a bigger canyon to continue. Follow that with the river for 3 more days till the river begins to turn. Another day or two from the river bend will be the town.” she answered a bit quietly. The two walking on with only the songs of flying birds by the running river breaking the silence. The river running near a steep slope that slowly turned into a cliff drop. Two cliffs being near enough to resemble the earth cracking in two. Creating an opening leading down to a shadowy darkness that the sun could not reach. Blake swallowing at the thought of falling off it as he tried to see the bottom. “don't look too far over please.” Val spoke in mild teasing mixed with seriousness. Both knowing the events the last time Blake looked too far over a cliff edge. “yeah.” Blake merely spoke as he got far away from the edge. Walking a few moments longer till Val stopped at stepping on dry gravel dirt. She looked down to kick a rock into the river. Looking up to stare into the distance toward the far mountains. Keeping away from showing her face toward Blake. Both knew it was time to part. “... you want the jacket?” Blake asked awkwardly. Wanting to say something, but not knowing what he could say. Awkwardly standing behind Val, a little away, with no answer coming from her. She brought her hands up together against her face, shutting her eyes. Fighting with herself inside over some difficult decision. Taking some deep breaths before dropping her hands with a sigh. “what will you be doing in the town?” Val asked suddenly. “figure out where to take all this. Talk to the FBI.” Blake answered. “and after that?” she asked. “...” Blake paused at the question. a question he hadn't thought about too much. “return to my job … alone. That is if the government doesn't force me into witness in hiding. retire maybe, try and travel the world I guess.” he answered, having no idea what to say about his future plans. “try to make a family?” she continued asking. “ … I don't know. … in the far future maybe.” he answered. Finding Vals questions digging a little deep. “have anyone you'd like to be with?” she asked with a deep breath. “nooo. … Why are you so interested in questions now?” he asked back with a raised eyebrow. Letting out an awkward chuckle. “to gather answers.” she stated, fidgeting with her sleeve. “answers for what?” he asked with suspicion. “trying to ask if she can come along with me?” he thought. Val took a deep breath looking to the ground before speaking. “i … love you.” she admitted.

#outlast 2 #blake langermann #val outlast

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mellz117 · 4 years

Text

Hi! I’m Mellz and I’m starting up Kingdom Hearts 2 on the PlayStation 2!

Just below are links to the first parts of my previous Kingdom Hearts plays.

[ KH1 ] _ [ Re:CoM Sora ] _ [ KH Re:CoM Riku ]

It’s been a hot minute, like 3,155,763 smoldering hot minutes, which would be 6 years including leap years. Yeah it was 01/27/2014 last I touched this game, exactly 6 years ago to this day (01/27/2020) as of me starting up again. This was an accident.

Guide thingy: Things like long gaps between commentary and days will be separated by a line of dots like that -> ……

Text relating to an image posted will have a blockquote either above and/or below the image

Dialogue exchanges will also be separated by a blockquote

Ok I'm playing on standard difficulty, if I'm having a hard time, then I just suck. If you’re reading this and haven’t experienced KH2 for yourself, why are you here? Go away, there’s spoilers for things that aren’t revealed until later.

SO LET’S JUST JUMP INTO IT

……………………………………………………………………………………………

I always liked this fancy CGI opening. There’s a lot of things I missed last I saw it.

IT’S HIM. Look how cute he is!

So we start off with a recap of Kingdom Hearts via a dream it seems and our protagonist, my precious boy Roxas, wakes up his own home all alone because apparently DiZ didn't create a digital family for him. But KH is notorious for forgetting parents, so maybe they did. I’m not Cinema Sins so I wont ping this game for not giving Roxas fake parents lmao

In the next scene Roxas is more interested in his own hands than he is in his friends' conversation.

blurry ring textures, blurry checker pattern. Not everything holds up well on a flat screen TV

He hasn't been paying attention so he's just as confused as the player is at this point when he finally takes his attention off his hands.

This dialogue is so early 2000's. KH1 and CoM avoided this but with the urban setting of Twilight Town it's DEFINITELY noticeable and outdated. So rumors have spread about Roxas, Hayner, Pence, and Olette that photographs are being stolen, and THEY'RE the theives. Who is the operator of the rumor mill? Seifer and his posse. Also the actual WORD is gone too, they try to say “photo” but it just DOESN’T EXIST. This is where the game gets a bit odd.

TUTORIALS GALORE. I JUST WANT TO PAUSE AND CHANGE THE CAMERA CONTROLS STOP TELLING ME ABOUT MY NEXT OBJECTIVE but no no it’s telling me how to lock on, control my camera, context sensitive buttons, etc

This girl’s dress looks like shes wearing a bra over it

I like how the animal AI hasn't changed at all in this entire series. And by like I mean hate, KH3 doesn't change that. Sven is as boring as this cat we have to look at.

The gang heads to the sandlot where Seifer, Fuujn, Raijin, and Vivi like to hang out I guess? Vivi is a little, solid black, wizard dwarf amongst all these regular humans and no one bats an eye. This shit is normal. Seifer with his stupid Seto Kaiba jacket, shows up to further accuse Roxas and his friends of stealing photos, one specifically of Roxas flat on his face and Seifer standing triumphantly over him (which we’re actually shown later). "That was undeniable proof that we totally owned you lamers" he says in regards to it and challenges Roxas to a rematch.

A+ dialogue

Seifer. My dude, ya dumb-dumb. If you think for one second that I'm gonna let my boy lose to you, you are sorely mistaken.

“If you get on your knees and beg, maybe I’ll let it slide.” Seifer says and Roxas plays it slick, taking a knee and looking through a convenient selection of foam weapons. Battle ensues.

So of course I win because Seifer is a pleb, and Pence takes a commemorative ______ of Roxas's sound victory, but oh no! Something stole the camera right out of Pence's hands! Roxas gives chase, because apparently he's the only one who cares enough to do so, and confronts the actual thief, a Dusk type Nobody. Roxas is taking this creature encounter rather calmly. Like mild confusion at most.

I hate these things, they're creepy. When you do a reversal on them they like, plant their hands on the ground behind them and their legs wrap around their arms while they spaz out. Ughghdhahh

Of course Roxas's foam bat doesnt cause any damage to the Dusk, and suddenly a familiar giant key digitally manifests in his hands. DiZ is installing mods I see. I have a Keyblade mod in Skyrim, so we have something in common.

After we defeat the thief the next scene shows the gang at the usual spot with the recovered photos. Ok ok so was "photo" the only word deleted from the vocabulary or were any other alternative words taken away too? Like, if they could have said "picture" this whole time, they would have had much less stupid sounding dialogue exchanges. Whatever lmao.

“Tell us about the picture thief.”

“Not much to say. The pictures were just lying there.”

You liar. Tell them about how you fought a wormy, white boy.

Pence notices all the pics are of Roxas and speculates the picture thief wanted to take the REAL Roxas and Hayner is like

The best friendships are ones where you can take jabs at each other and know there’s no malice intended.

In the scene thereafter, the kids go their separate ways, the evening(?) sun assaults Roxas's eyes, and whenever he closes them he gets another vision? Idk what time of day it is it always looks the same.

God ok as someone who hadn’t played CoM before playing KH2 for the first time, I must have been SUPER lost regarding who DiZ and Namine were and why Sora is in the pod. More recaps of KH1: I don’t know why they found it necessary to redub over the old voices with the new actors in these flashbacks.

Moving on. Roxas learns what the Keyblade is through his dreams. On his way to meet up with his friends, he tries summoning the Keyblade with a stick, when that doesn’t work he carelessly throws it aside and it hits this cloak clad man behind him. This dude is either completely unfazed by that is or so offended he can’t even say anything and walks away before he goes all Karen on Roxas’s ass.

We’re back at the usual spot and summer vacation is nearing it’s end. Hayner wants to go to the beach before school is back in session! You poor fuckers...

Same, dude. I’m waiting on my tax returns, looking forward to that.

SKATEBOARD

“TO DEFEAT THE HUNSSSSSSS!”

Pretzels at the beach? Salty and not refreshing. I got you fam, I’ll make enough money for a watermelon. Roxas is so poor omg... How much is 150 Munny in American currency?

Just BEAT the cargo with a foam bat. What’s IN the bag? Is it trash? Clothes? Is it potentially breakable? Next. Time to beat some bees!

So Poster Duty was my go-to job in this game in the past because you could get 100 Munny if you did well. But now that I’m older I realized how annoying it is. I had an efficient route planned out, hit as many of the 3 poster placements in that route, and be over and done with that in about 1:10....

But then Roxas goes aND DOES THIS!

FUCKING SKIPS THE ONE DIRECTLY NEXT TO HIM, DEFYING GRAVITY IN FAVOR OF THE POSTS BELOW

HE DOES THIS CONSISTENTLY!! I do have a live reaction to this but it’s too big for tumblr. I’ll have it up on youtube one of these days

Eventually I stopped sticking posters to walls and became a mailman until the game made me stop.

Black-clad man is back with his own stick! Oof, Roxas eats the pavement and is manhandled by cloaky boy. WAS THIS ROUGH TREATMENT REALLY THAT NECESSARY? You might wanna treat Sora's Nobody with a little more respect. AND YOU STOLE HIS HARD-EARNED MONEY! YOU BASTARD!

The gang is on the clock tower, very dangerously high up. Wtf what if someone falls?! Roxas feels so guilty about what happened and Hayner gets over this little fiasco pretty quickly and the next day he already has another fun plan.

……………………………………………………………………………………………

On his way to the station, Roxas crosses paths with Pence and Olette, the latter two freeze and Roxas meets Namine. Is her interest in Roxas linked to her desire to be Sora’s friend? A strange girl tells Roxas she wanted to meet him “at least once” and he doesn’t know what to do lol. Namine doesn’t stay long, leaving Roxas with his confusion. What is going through his head? A girl he doesn’t know seems to know him well enough to want to see him. Pence and Olette unfreeze after Namine is out of the shot. Pence and Olette have such a cute relationship, I’d love for them to be siblings. Pence goes shopping with her even if he might not want to. I can relate, I hate clothes shopping.

These Dusks don’t seem like too much of a threat tbh, they just kinda swagger slowly towards Roxas and grab his hand. Roxas hardly struggles to escape to the sandlot.

Chicken wuss

WE FINALLY GET SOMEWEHERE, we end up on the stained glass pillars in the Station of Serenity (?). Time to grind for like 5 minutes because this giant noodle boy already killed me once.

This thing really unsettles me. All the creature Nobodies do! They’re all twitchy and stretchy. DISGUSTING

DAMN THAT IS A HIGH FALL HOW DO YOU SURVIVE THAT?!

Upon defeat, this big noodle boy falls on top of Roxas and Namine saves him from being enveloped by darkness.

Namine really seems to like to silence him. First she shoves her hand in his face but that was too forward. This time she daintily places a finger over her lips and says her part. Black-cloak guy shows up, rough handles Namine a little bit but not as roughly as he did Roxas. AND SHOVES ROXAS INTO A PORTAL

SEIFER IS AN OPPORTUNISTIC SHITLET POSING IN FRONT OF HIS UNCONSIOUS BODY. Bitch you didn’t earn that. Hayner, Pence, and Olette see Roxas with Seifer’s gang, Hayner feels betrayed thinking Roxas ghosted him in favor of Seifer. He stays pretty salty about it for a good while

IM NOT WORKING ON THIS LIKE I SHOULD. ITS ALMOST A MONTH SINCE STARTING. In my next post we'll be "Struggling" to progress. Eh? Eh? Get it? Like the tournament?

I'm not funny.

Here’s the next part: [ _2_ ]

Below is a compilation of my live reactions and comments throughout this point of the game.

youtube

#mellz plays kh2 #Kingdom Hearts Series #kingdom hearts 2 #kh2 #PlayStation 2 #square enix #disney #mellz post

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elliesproblems · 5 years

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To Whom it May Concern: Chapter Five

Running from Certain Death

Entry: November 13th, 2017

I hate that she has become this all capable being of my nightmares. Like a mean girl at highschool who can make the whole building her army at the flip of a coin. It doesn’t matter who is right and who is wrong. Loyalty doesn’t always mean good. But she was an awkward person, and I doubted any mean girl could have the power to change anyone's minds in mass like she did.

It hurts to know that those you have come to trust can be a liability; that they are dependable as long as it doesn’t go against her grains. It’s been a year since it’s happened and still I don’t know why or how. Maybe it’s the not knowing that makes me think of her as all persuasive. I don’t know how she did it or why they all left me behind.

Maybe it’s the not knowing that feeds the paranoia of it happening again. I knew she was drifting, I knew she was unhappy, but I could have never seen it all coming. It was series of believing that it couldn’t get any worse only for someone to punch me in the gut around the next corner.

I’ve met the person that comes out when I’m on the cold concrete, and being stupid enough to believe that it can’t get worse. The girl that lived through it all; never saw the end of it. I shut it out and locked Jay alongside it. I got rid of it all to be able to breathe again. I lost it all, Jay included. It was as if I were orbiting alone, in the darkness; seeing them all together and happy, but never apart of it all. I’ve had my fair share of wanting to never be here, or wishing to not be alive, but they were always these abstract feelings. They were desires with no words to them.

It was then that I actually felt the first want to die; not in a ‘no longer exist’ way, but in a ‘I want to feel the pain fade away from my body, and never have to look at any of their faces again’ way.

Despite how angry I was with them, knowing that dying might very well be the only way for them to feel any remorse for blaming me. I was still more scared of the idea of wanting to prove a point with my blood than than the idea of them leaving me again. I was determined to prove them all wrong, but cowardice stopped me, and cowardice saved my life. In that long year, I learned to live without them all, and I made the biggest gap between me and all of them that I could manage, so the if she were to ever come back, none of them could hurt me. She could take them, there was no changing that, but at least this time I won’t need them. She did this to Jay but she could never touch me.

Sometimes I hate myself for still caring about how little they value us. It’s old news, but still an ulcer. Sometimes I try to save myself from it.

When it seems like I have nowhere else to turn and the only way to escape the walls that are both closing in so fast I can’t breathe, and the walls that are receding so fast that I could never catch up, it seems like the only option is to just punch your own ticket, and get the hell out of here.

It would be the only way for them to regret what they did; and it would be the only way for closure. They are all at fault and then they would finally have to wear the weight of it.

But I survived it the first time. Not a lot of me survived, but I'm here. Somehow. Now all that’s left is the fear of her coming back for round two, and I know that I will not last. I’ve come to terms with the weakness of my own mind.

I’ve learned that wanting to disappear from the hands of your ‘loved’ ones is an addictive emotion that feeds the destructive fire bleeding into my actions as I grow to always be angry with their failure to see right from wrong. I blame them the way they blamed me, but there is one simple solution to satisfy the want to end it all. It ties over the feeling I get whenever I look over a railing for a little too long or when I take three pills where I only needed one.

I can just disappear. I can drive off into the sunset and into the unknown because what I’ve known hasn’t been all that great. If this place that I am at is slowly killing me, then it’s only sensible to leave, kill the person I once was, and become another. I wanted to stand up and refuse to be someone I wasn't anymore. I wanted so badly to become someone she never met so I did. I wanted to become someone that wasn’t hurt by them, but I still was, and I never went through with it. I never demanded to be seen as someone else. I never had the funds before the feeling grew more violent and demanded more than a new persona.

November 13th, 2017

I’m too comfortable with how things are now, it makes me feel restless. I’m worried for the future and how many times I’ll have to compromise where most shouldn’t. I’m worried with how predictable I’ve become, and how I know my limit will be passed again.

I’ve learned to let go of T***. I was holding on for what was familiar rather than love. I’ve learned to be happy for him and the fact that his life is falling into place faster than anyone expected. But I worry for the possibility of her coming to the wedding. It’s haunted me enough quiet nights.

She has the ability to turn everyone against me, and even if she’s gone from my life, everyone I’ve ever talked to serves as a bridge to her. They’ll willingly bring her back, and I’ll lose what little footing I’ve gotten back,

I worry for how predictable I’ve become because I know what will become of me if she is given the second chance to do it again. Every foothold I’ve gained lacks the security and strengths of the friendships I once had. I’ve learned where they all stand when they look at me.

T*** will stay true until a better opportunity rolls around; I hope next time he won’t have to push me away to get to it. Even now, every missed meet up and late answers sends tremors through our poorly crafted makeup, made of nothing more than pretending nothing ever happened. He only came back once I learned to be content alone.

F**** will only pretend to be supportive, but will defend her no matter the cost. She digs for feelings, with only the intent to feed the information to her, congratulating her on a job well done. It’s only common sense not to trust F**** to have my well being in mind.

Dads support only goes as far as he can understand, and even then, there are a few things he won’t support regardless. He’s not as protective as I originally pegged him out to be. As long as nobody got physical or foul mouthed, he was willing to support her. Because he understood her side more than mine.

Mother was only fed F****s words, and she was easily the first to turn against me. I was made to appear crazy by the very person who drove me there.

I won’t be able to stand a second round even though it’s close approaching. She shows her face at the wedding, they all approach her with “I miss you’”s and “I haven’t seen you in a while”’s. They all know it’s because of me, and this time they won’t consider my well being. And if she can turn them against me the first time, when I believed that they were mine. I want to say I wont see the second time coming, but that was true for the first, and we all know, it will somehow always be worse.

I can’t outlive a second round. I hate to be dramatic, but I have to prepare.

I’ll be saving money to run off to Biloxi because I can’t kill myself if I’m in my happy place, right? I don’t know for how long. I might hide out there until I’ve become a missing person, or I may just live their until I emotionally level out.

And sure, it seems predictable, but none of them would waste the time to come looking for me anyways.

A note from the future, because sometimes your biggest fears are not as terrible as you think they are. Maybe there is a 'pleasantly surprised' to count on.

She is invited to the wedding. I knew in advance, T*** admitted himself that it had been a mistake, but the damage was done. She knew the date and the place, and had never been one for human decently to know she shouldn't have been welcomed.

The biggest surprise was that she wasn't.

T*** did not uninvite her. He didn't want to seem rude, he thought she would show up anyways, she was there when he got together with his now husband, he did want her there.

So I gave up. I didn't save anything because I was promised that I had nothing to fear, and I was part of the wedding, after all. He wanted me there. Just not badly enough. How could he be rude to her even through her putting him several thousand dollars in debt? How could he be rude to her even after all she's done to what he claims is his best friend?

I stayed home. I resigned my place, I gave up, I was not ready for the 'I miss you's and 'I haven't seen you in awhile’s, but I knew they were coming. I wasn't ready for round two, but I knew it was coming. I thought I knew, but I was wrong twice now.

Dad stayed home, F**** stayed home, E**** mom, all of them. I never gave a second to think that they would, but this time they stood by me. This time I wasn't on my own to be blamed.

#ellies log #elliesproblems #i love yall #to whom it may concern.#chapter five #osdd system #osdd #did #disasociative identity disorder

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ahmad36thorsen-blog · 5 years

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I thought I really could save transition organizations and a couple of dollars, however, I quoted actually every company for sale in doctor along with the lowest I found was 580 monthly for your same protections. Thats a distinction that is HUGEEE! If anything is wrong with my coverage, I am starting to wonder. I've had it a couple of year with no concerns, and my state that was not responsible had easily. I'm the sole policy holder, with no, my family is not with Nationwide often... What might lead to such a difference? Any suggestions?" Where can I locate information about feminine auto insurance? Is it really cheaper than for males? Where could I find details about female car insurance? Is it surely cheaper than for men? Automobile Insurance Aid...? I'm new-to this auto insurance point and I need help selecting which one is most beneficial. What do I need to request? Howmuch approximately is auto insurance? My parents used to pay for mine on theirs which was $134...I want to attempt to maintain that range around. Till I turn 21 to have it should I wait? Enable me please!!! :) Thanks Healthinsurance insurance? I'm currently included in the companyis health insurance (with dental) program. After I quit/keep present task, how can this medical health insurance insurance function? What choices do I've to the medical health insurance, before additional corporation employed me?" Howmuch would it not cost to cover a 2012 honda civic 2.2 diesel? Simply how much would it charge a 21year old man with a 3-year license to ensure a 2012 honda civic 2.2 diesel. Insurance quesion, help!? Cash value life insurance is more expensive than term insurance because a. it is usually sold to older people who have higher mortality. b. higher rates of interest are earned on term policy investments. c. whole life is subject to adverse selection. d. the whole life contracts include both a protection element and a savings or investment element. e. none of the above. Is this one C? Past efforts to address the growing imbalance between tax-paying workers and social security beneficiaries have included a. increasing the social security (FICA) tax rate. b. increasing the maximum income subject to the social security tax. c. increasing the normal retirement age. d. taxing part of social security benefits. e. all of the above. This one E? The Consolidated Omnibus Budget Reconciliation Act (COBRA) contains provisions that a. allow continuation of group health insurance by employees and certain dependents upon the occurrence of designated events. b. apply to all employers offering group health insurance to employees. c. require an employer to pay the cost of continuing former employees' health insurance for up to 36 months. d. allows terminated employees to continue their group health insurance for up to 36 months. e. all of the above. This one E? I would recommend that you visit this website where you can get rates from the best companies: http://insurancehqreview.xyz

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fiercyy · 6 years

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Take My Hand But Leave My Heart [3/?]

In order to protect Sakura from an enemy of Konoha, Sasuke buys her and binds her to himself with an ancient jutsu. She is not very understanding.

Read from Chapter 1

Sakura stormed out of the building and found herself at a loss. When she was upset like this, the best medicine was usually Naruto. His unwavering cheerfulness, his open and inviting self. She never had to wonder if he was genuinely interested in her problems or just humoring her. His artless love for his friends was so all encompassing that their smallest grievances were his.

But she knew how the conversation would play out. Naruto would defend Sasuke. He'd tell her that he must have a reason. He would coax her into softening her heart, giving him the benefit of the doubt. In essence, he'd side with Sasuke. That's not how Naruto would see it, but that's how it would feel.

It was the last thing she wanted right now.

For a second –and really, the thought exercise was just for her own amusement –she imagined how Sai would react to her presenting him with this problem. It briefly lightened her mood.

So deep in thought was she, that Sakura didn't see the solution until it had already thrown an arm around her shoulders in friendly greeting.

Karin and Sakura had become fast friends after she'd saved her life. In doing so, she'd earned the taciturn missing nin's eternal loyalty and unwavering support. In her own way, Karin loved Sakura as much as she loved anyone.

And she could always be counted on to commiserate and rage.

Karin took one look at Sakura- furrowed brow, red rimmed eyes and lips so pale as to be practically non existent-and decided that what she really needed at this very moment was to get a drink.

Twenty minutes later they sat in a scarcely populated bar, with six shot glasses between them and Sakura halfway through a summary of her situation.

"I will fucking kill him. You just say the word."

Sakura smiled and squeezed Karin's hand. "Maybe I could poison him."

The sudden zap she felt at the thought seemed to indicate otherwise.

"Is there anyway to break it?"

Sakura bit her lip. "...I didn't stay to find out."

"Temper temper," Karin chortled, sounding proud rather than chastigating. "Why'd he do it?"

She rolled her eyes. Who cares? The truth was, she did. Sasuke never did anything 'just because'. Deep down, she was sure there was some high and mighty reason. She knew he wasn't cruel. He was her friend, but more importantly, her teammate. He would always watch her back. But for now, she didn't need to sympathize with the enemy. She needed to be angry.

And knock back a shot or two.

As she did, a sharp zap of disapproval shot through her. She shrieked her frustration heavenward. "ARE YOU KIDDING ME WITH THIS?!" and then, just to show he couldn't control her, she tossed back another. "OW."

Then another. "FU-!"

"Sakura," Karin chortled, "what the hell are you doing?"

"Showing that fucking imbecile that I can do what I want!" She stole one of Karin's shots and knocked it back for good measure.

The bartender set another tray of shots in front of them. Sakura, throat hoarse from burning exclaimed (too loudly) that they hadn't ordered more. The bartender smiled and nodded his head towards a pair of men in the corner booth. They were handsome. One raised a glass and winked at her. Sakura blushed.

She felt a sudden sharp pain in her chest and her face crumpled.

When Karin asked her what was the matter, she lied and told her it was another zap from the bracelet. But the truth was much more complicated than that.

She kept expecting to cry. Karin probably expected that too, with the way she kept throwing her sidelong glances. But she wasn't out of anger yet.

Three beers deeper, Sakura was sobbing her eyes out loudly and publicly.

"I just- I thought we were friends, you know?" Karin kindly handed her a cocktail napkin to blow her nose in. "I thought- we were definitely- we were heading towards something. I'm not crazy, I know he doesn't lo-love me but-" hiccup "we're friends." She spat the word, embedded with all the layered meaning she could manage.

Karin patted her shoulder, "If he doesn't, he's crazy. And as your friend, I have to tell you: you can do so much better."

"Not anymore!"

Sasuke winced every time Sakura took a shot. It caused him no physical pain, but to know he had no way of stopping the retaliatory shocks was akin to torture. He'd wager it hurt him more than it hurt her.

To the casual observer, it looked like Sasuke was having a fit.

To an oblivious companion, it was mistaken for constipation.

"Listen man, you gotta check the bread for mould."

"Cease and desist."

"Fine, be that way. Your treat then."

"Sakura says the new book is good, you can afford it."

"I have no idea what you could possibly be talking about," Naruto delivered the line as the very picture of angelic innocence. "What book?"

Sasuke wrinkled his nose at having to voice the title. "You know exactly what I'm talking about."

"I cannot recall."

"Icha Icha ringing any bells?"

"None."

"...Did you consult a lawyer before this conversation? What is happening?"

"Sasuke," Naruto's uncharacteristically stern face drew them back to the matter at hand. "You couldn't have led with your reasons?"

Sasuke took a bite out of a soft boiled egg and refused to answer.

"If you'd just explained she would have understood."

"What difference would it have made?"

"She'd know it wasn't your fault."

"Of course it's my fault."

"What else could you have done?"

"..."

"You were trying to protect her."

Sasuke pushed his bowl away, no longer hungry. "She gets to be angry about this. It's a horrible situation. If she couldn't be mad at me, what would that leave her with?"

"That's twisted."

"That's kindness."

"What the fuck, no-"

"If I had told her, she'd have run off. This whole business is a waiting game. First piece of information I get, I'm heading out."

Naruto clapped him on his back."You'll fix this. I know you will." Laying enough change on the counter, he stood up and wiped his hands. "I'm gonna go. I've got a date. If I know Sakura, she's getting plastered right now." Sasuke's grim expression confirmed it. "It's probably the closest she'll get to reasonable for a while. You should talk to her."

As Naruto departed and Sasuke mulled over his words, he was struck by a thought. "You're having another dinner?!"

Naruto waved over his shoulder, "Not that kind of date," he shouted, prompting Sasuke's brows to rise.

Another zap shook him from unwelcome thoughts of Naruto's sex life.

To be frank, he didn't love Sakura's drinking habits. He didn't love her eating or sleeping habits either. He hoped this didn't mean she'd get shocked if she tried to order takeout. The disapproval stemmed from his honestly very sincere and legitimate worries over her health. Sakura had a tendency to overwork herself. She hardly ever ate anything green unless he made her.

He'd taken to making bentos for Team 7 training sessions for this exact reason.

How his teammates had survived without him, he'll never know.

And it wasnt that he disapproved of drinking in general. He imbibed occasionally. He understood the need to unwind, especially for people as stressed at Sakura and Kakashi. But Sakura had inherited many things from her master and he worried that Tsunade's drinking problem would be among them. And she got so emotional when she drank. He didn't know how to deal with that. Especially when she kept touching him, as she was wont to do only when she was plotzed.

A frown pulled at the corners of his lips.

He threw money down on the counter and talked himself in and out of finding her.

Eventually, his worse nature won out and he followed the invisible thread that tethered them together now.

He found her ten blocks from her apartment, half her weight supported by Karin.

Shockingly, his former teammate didn't seem surprised or perturbed to see him. She practically tossed his other former teammate into his arms. "Help me out, would ya?"

He took over the burden, holding her up with his good arm.

"I'm too drunk to try and kill you, but res'assured I'll try if you touch her," Karin shoved a finger up his nose in a strange attempt to intimidate him.

Sasuke wanted to die.

"You couldn't even if you wanted to and I am touching her. You handed her to me."

"Shut up."

With a heaving sigh Sasuke hitched Sakura onto his back and began the tedious process of herding Karin to the bridge she lived under.

Once there was a door safely between Sasuke and a manslaughter charge, his throbbing headache began to ebb.

Sakura was a pleasant weight on his back. Occasionally, she would rouse and murmur in his ear, funny things like death threats and her hopes for the fictional couple in Icha Icha Trials.

The cool night air and empty streets offered him a welcome liminal space between himself and the morning.

Chapter 4

a/n: Hope I've been able to take you all somewhere unexpected so far. Thanks for reading!

#sasusaku #sasuke x sakura #naruto #sasusaku fanfiction #sakura uchiha #sakura haruno #sasuke uchiha #take my hand but leave my heart #my fic

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groundramon · 6 years

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Homph I finished tri and I wrote down my thoughts as I was watching because I had too many funny shitposts and nobody to share them with bc charlie hasn’t watched tri yet

PS i wont be reblogging tri spoilers (besides MINOR stuff like, digivolutions of already confirmed digivolution lines or non-spoilery shitposts, but I’ll try to tag shitposts as #tri spoilers anyways [digivolutions specific to tri ill tag as well but not ones that were already basically confirmed]) for a while so ur safe here! I’m just gonna like everything/most things because then I can rb em to hisyaryumon lmao (also u should check out hisyaryumon....its me n charlie’s digimon blog)

EP 1:

- ok. alright. ok. good. they’re dealing with kari’s emotions now instead of just. nothing. ok. alright. cool. Still dont like how obscure/”artsy” they’re being with it, this is digimon not kagerou project, but ok.

- Also. I stand by tk and kari being one of the few good straight ships in digimon. just saying.

- kari: this is my fault... me: god damn it shut up you little brat also me: god relatable ALSO me: ill take whatever display of emotions i can get

- I love how nobody believes tai is dead like. They’re upset and worried but they’re also like “nah. he cant be. that fucking asshole just left us in our time of need” (actually only matt is the last one)

- Gabumon i would die for you also im crying and I think that’s the first time tri managed to make me fucking CRY

EP 2:

- I had thoughts but then the 02 kids happened and I entered another plane of reality. I don’t feel real right now

- the only one I can remember is evil!gennai being a dumbass and being like “SUFFER AND SQUIRM YOU PATHETIC HUMANS AS YOU FIGHT OVER THE LAST SEAT” 1. humans are KNOWN for their ability to care for others you dumb obvious fuck and 2. is. is the entire tube going? because that tube can fit too people if they squish. This isn’t a joke I’m serious it can.

- oh yeah also when i saw whomstever the fuck his name is (adult guy who i love but fuck names) and he was all bloodied i was like “its a cold day in hell when i see blood in digimon” (I think there was blood in an earlier ep but shh idc)

EP 3:

- didn’t nishijima start off as a fucking life coach to these kids. What the fuck he was supposed to help them find a career not emotionally scar them by bloodily dying in front of one of them

- im realizing that the reason hackmon was always in his cloak, in the shadows, standing still is that they cannot animate him in any normal position for the life of him. I drew him with better anatomy when i was 14 and didn’t have a tablet. No seriously, look:

I didn’t say it wasn’t bad, you guys are just underestimating how bad the anatomy on this poor creature is. Why cant ppl draw dracomon or hackmon correctly imma cry

- ordinemon has the best reaction faces

the best part about these two screenshots is that they literally cut one to the other, first the first one to the second one and then it cuts back to the first one. They were really proud of these stupid ass expressions.

- I started overcoming my dissociation shock from the second episode and my hypercritical mind was analyzing the shit out of everything that happened (it is Not happy) but then evil!gennai called kari and evil goddess and idk if he’s exaggerating to make her feel bad or if she’s literally a fucking god of chaos and destruction and either way im like

she did kinda like. Watch wizardmon die, watch tai die, watch gatomon get absorbed. The dark ocean is just a metaphor for depression and honestly if 02 wasn’t all over the fucking place I think Kari would’ve had some pretty decent development in it. Actually you know what, I’m using that as an angle to approach Tri at now, wish me luck bc i might actually give it more leeway now

EP 4:

- I’m not dissociating but I forgot to say anything again and I already forgot what happened

- Cant believe mei is fucking dead

EP 5:

- I like to imagine that Tai got there like a few minutes ago, but he was like “well damn guess yall figured it out without me. alright ill just. see if I need to do anything” and then meicoomon was Still Bad so he waited for when she struck just to make the most badass entrance possible. Fucking extra ass bitch

- I forgot to write anything again but uhhh I wasn’t satisfied so anyways lets just get into the Juicy Details

Originally I was actually planning to be kinder to Tri than I expected. Was very invested during it. ‘Round the end of the last ep I realized hmmm no this isn’t working out. Where are the 02 kids. You should’ve brought them in to save the day. That would’ve been SO cool and SO fun. Fucking cowards.

god I’m kinda tired so I’m going to address a couple things I still had problems with, note that this isn’t everything it’s just everything I felt comfortable yelling about without rewatching past eps. Like I forgot nishijima was all bloodied and presumably died in the last part until they brought it up and I was like “????” ALSO DID THE LADY WHO WAS HIS PARTNER OR W/E KILL HERSELF WITH THE GUN SHE FOUND, I JUST REALIZED LITERALLY AS I WAS TYPING THIS THAT SHE FOUND A GUN AND THEN I THINK IT CUT TO BLACK AND I’M

DID SHE FUCKING KILL HERSELF WHAT THE FUCK

anyways my problems:

1. They did joe. really dirty. I’ll write a more proper rant on this sometime later (mostly bc charlie is MUCH better at talking about joe than I am) but basically I can tell you that his character development in the movies squandered his OG character development. He’s basically an entirely different person. Like Tri joe isn’t bad, besides being largely neglected (yes he has a whole half a movie to himself, no that doesn’t make up for it all), its just...not OG joe. He’s a fine character just not the same character, and its NOT fine when you put the two together.

2. THEY DID THE 02 KIDS EVEN DIRTIER IM SO BITTER sorry you nostalgia-blind, money-hungry fucks at bandai, but the 02 cast is PART OF THE ADVENTURES UNIVERSE. The only people who hate 02 are ones who like the characters but hate the mess of the storyline at the end, or are completely irrational and elitist about their love of the digimon series and would greatly re-evaluate their opinions if they watched the original series and 02 back to back. They couldn’t even show them in some kind of group montage at the end??? Standing in the background when they call Mei??? Why couldn’t they call mei from a home phone also, but that’s a less important problem idc that much. It was a cute scene besides the lack of 02 characters. Whatever. AND THE PROBLEM IS LIKE kari and tk? This entire time??? Were like “oh they disappeared. oops” instead of being frantically searching for their lost friends??? Like i get tk and kari probably have fucking ptsd and can’t express any emotions because they watched important people die in front of their eyes at an incredibly young age but also 1. they didn’t address the ramifications of ptsd, so fuck that theory/excuse and 2. THAT??? WOULD ONLY MAKE THEM LOOK HARDER??? and put on a brave face as they look, but inside they’re so scared and so worried. Not just “oh sweet, they were found/saved, theyre in the hospital but that’s fine” like WHAT theyre fucking assholes if that’s what they’d canonically do lmao. God I am SO bitter over the ENTIRE thing with the 02 kids, it would’ve been BETTER if they were deleted from the fucking canon entirely. Would I have still been bitter? Yes. But at least I wouldn’t be madder at TK and Kari too.

3. I stand 100% by the notion that Digimon is not and will never be cut out to be an adults’ franchise. It wasn’t designed for adults, and it can’t be skewered towards adults. These particular characters were designed for kids to relate to and find entertaining. They do not work when placed into an adult setting. Like, can you imagine a character like Ed from FMA going to the Digimon world? I guess in a way that’s just Marcus but like. Just imagine the FMA cast in Digimon Adventure. It doesn’t work. Digimon Tri is basically that except real. Also Data Squad was darker than Adventure so my joke doesn’t even work.

I guess my primary point is that Tri isn’t mature enough of a setup for an adult audience. It puts a focus on being “complex” and “philosophical” instead of working within Digimon’s constraints and making something good and adult out of that. Like! Digimon is a fucking TOY COMMERCIAL. Don’t give me messages about the futility of human life. I want bad puns and emotional characters. That’s what Digimon has ALWAYS been, and ideally always will be. Tri could’ve made itself more mature by dealing with the ramifications of the Digital World’s events, how it affected the kids psychologically and dealing with healing old scars. It would’ve been a more mature take on a story we loved and would use things we loved about the story already - the fact that it took so much time exploring characters’ emotions and was surprisingly mature for the time - to make itself better. You need to take the aspects that drew adults to the show and amplify them, not just slap on a complex story and unfunny dialogue and be like “oh this is fine, right?”

It’s not that Digimon can’t exist as an adult property, its just that if it repeats what Tri did, it’s got no merit and in my eyes the franchise is dead. If it survives I guess I’ll be happy that people can still enjoy it but I find it unsustainable and unsatisfying to fans of the older series. Tri is just a fuckfest of highly specific nostalgia that tries too hard to appeal to old fans without capturing what made the original series so magical, and in part thats because the original series WASN’T FOR ADULTS. I don’t know about the Digimon Story games, bc they’re T-rated so perhaps they’re a better take on an adult Digimon story than Tri? But you either need to make your own characters and lore specifically for an adult-oriented Digimon season, or perish. Also, please make it a series and not a group of movies. Getting four eps every 6-9 months was hell.

I stand by saying Appmon is a more faithful Digimon season than Tri to Digimon’s original spirit. I believe it holds more potential for success than Tri and better embodies the spirit of the older Digimon seasons. It’s dumb, its corny, it has horrible puns, but I LOVE it because it also has a deep dark story and emotional moments. If you dislike Tri and you agree with things I said that make it unlikeable, I highly recommend giving Appmon a chance - if you watch a few episodes and think “oh yeah, I guess this is decent” you’re going to like it. It’s everything Digimon has always been and hopefully always will be, just with a different concept. And hopefully the end of the series doesn’t leave a sour taste in my mouth and I have to redact this statement haha since I’m not done with it yet, but I’ve heard good things about it so I’m hoping not so.

Overall, if you watch Tri, don’t get your hopes up. It resolves everything okay-ish but it’s a pretty forgettable anime on its own and simply doesn’t work as part of the Digimon franchise.

I am, however, pretty interested in what evil!gennai said at the end about Diaboromon and Daemon. It raises interesting questions about the timeline too. We know Daemon is in the dark ocean, so perhaps that’s a hint at a future project? (They did confirm a future project btw, in conjunction with tri being over) But what about Diaboromon? I dont believe that Our War Game (I think thats what its called?) took place after Tri, based on the outfits and ages and stuff, but I also don’t remember the movies that well. Could Diaboromon still be out there too? It’s interesting.

However, because of the lackluster performance of Tri, I don’t have my hopes up and I really hope that this “next project” goes in a different direction. Although I guess if they include the 02 kids, I’ll be somewhat less salty...

Side note, did they ever explain why the gennais went evil? Like ? That’s a pretty important thing. The gennais helped SAVE the human world in 02. And I get that apparently Tri is ignoring 02′s ending but still. It’s shitty, because Gennai was still a good guy in the original too (and also they cant just keep is younger look and act like 02 never happened) MAYBE its something I missed but I dont think so. God there’s just. So much wrong with Tri. I’m very displeased and very bitter and I wanna get back to Appmon asap.

It’s got good moments, its got bad moments, I dont know, I don’t care. There’s nothing wrong with you if you like it, there’s nothing wrong with you if you don’t, and there’s nothing wrong with you if you flip flop and are split like me. I just wish Tri fulfilled its potential instead of becoming a boring mess.

#stormy speaks #digimon

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jalilaloui · 4 years

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60 Funniest One-Liners That Will Leave Your Friends Laughing

BECOME THE SITCOM HERO YOU'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO BE.

We've all experienced that awkward moment of silence. It happens even during a gathering of old friends. there is a lull within the conversation, and no-one knows quite what to mention . you would like to save lots of everybody from the awkwardness, but your mind may be a blank. you do not want to blurt something silly, because that just makes the instant all the more awful and cringe-worthy.

But if you had a game-plan—a foolproof joke, a one-liner, say, that would suck all the strain out of the room—why, you would be a hero! you would be the Chevy Chase circa late-'70s of your social circle, the one who might be counted on to mention the right thing at the right time to form everybody feel a touch less uncomfortable and silly. If only you had planned and had a couple of one-liners in your back pocket, ready for whenever you needed them… Relax, we have got your back. Here are 60 funny, clever, and oh-so-smart one-liners that are perfect for any occasion. Commit them to memory, and you will have your friends laughing so hard they will not even remember why the conversation had lagged within the first place.

1- "I always take life with a grain of salt. Plus, a slice of lemon. And an attempt of tequila." 2- "I do not have a beer gut. I even have a protective covering for my rock hard abs."

3- "I read recipes an equivalent way I read fantasy . i buy to the top and that i think, 'Well, that's not getting to happen.'" 4- "Money talks. But all mine ever says is goodbye." 5- "Knowledge is knowing a tomato may be a fruit. Wisdom isn't putting it during a salad ." 6- "Life's sort of a bird. It's pretty cute until it poops on your head." 7- "I'm skeptical of anyone who tells me they are doing yoga a day . That's a touch of a stretch." 8- "I do not have a girlfriend. But i do know a woman that might get mad if she heard me say that." 9- "A computer once beat me at chess. But it had been no match on behalf of me at kickboxing." 10- "I have tons of growing up to try to to . i noticed that the opposite day inside my fort." 11- "Give a person a fish and you feed him for each day . But teach a person to fish, and you saved yourself a fish, haven't you?" 12- "We have enough youth. How a few Fountain of Smart?" 13- "A clear conscience is typically the sign of a nasty memory." 14- "My therapist says I even have a preoccupation with vengeance. We'll see that ." 15- My first experience with culture shock? Probably once I peed on an electrical fence." 16- "Worrying works! quite 90 percent of the items I worry about never happen." 17- "I do not have an attitude problem. you've got a perception problem." 18- "Money can't buy you happiness? Well, check this out, I bought myself a cheerful Meal!" 19- "The easiest time to feature insult to injury is when you're signing somebody's cast." 20- "You don't need a parachute to travel skydiving. you would like a parachute to travel skydiving twice." 21- "Letting go of a beloved are often hard. But sometimes, it is the only thanks to survive a hiking catastrophe." 22- "A positive attitude might not solve all of your problems. But it'll annoy enough people to form it well worth the effort." 23- "Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back." 24- "Build a person a fireplace , and he'll be warm for each day . Set a person ablaze , and he'll be warm for the remainder of his life." 25- "Knowledge is power, and power corrupts. So study hard and be evil." 26- "Isn't it odd the way everyone automatically assumes that the goo in soap dispensers is usually soap? i prefer to fill mine with mustard, just to show people a lesson in trust." 27- "I wont to be indecisive. Now I'm unsure ." 28- "Women shouldn't have children after 35. 35 children are enough.

29- "Going to church doesn't cause you to a Christian any longer than standing during a garage causes you to a car."

30- "It's never an honest idea to stay both feet firmly on the bottom . you will have trouble putting on your pants.

31- "Change is inevitable—except from a slot machine ."

32- "Why does someone believe you once you say there are four billion stars but checks once you say the paint is wet?" 33- I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it." "What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a 34-"southern fairytale? A northern fairytale begins 'Once upon a time…' A southern fairytale begins 'Y'all ain't gonna believe this'"

35- "The last item i would like to try to to is hurt you. But it's still on the list." 36- "There are three sorts of people: those that can count and people who can't." 37- "I am not a vegetarian because i like animals. i'm a vegetarian because I hate plants." 38- "At every party there are two sorts of people: those that want to travel home and people who don't. the difficulty is, they're usually married to every other." 39- "If Walmart is lowering prices a day , why isn't anything within the store free yet?" 40- "The easiest job within the world has got to be coroner. what is the worst thing that would happen? If everything goes wrong, maybe you'd get a pulse." 41- "I have all the cash I'll ever need—if I die by 3:00 p.m. this afternoon." 42- "A TV can insult your intelligence. But nothing rubs it in sort of a computer." 43- "When tempted to fight fire with fire, always remember… the hearth department usually uses water." 44- "You are such an honest friend that, if we were on a sinking ship together and there was just one life vest , I'd miss you such a lot and mention you fondly to everybody who asked." 45- "The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese." 46- "This is my step ladder. I never knew my real ladder." Some cause happiness wherever they are going . Others whenever they are going ." 47- "It's not the autumn that kills you. it is the sudden stop at the top ." 48- "Feeling pretty pleased with myself. The puzzle I bought said 3-5 years, but I finished it in 18 months." 49- "Just burned 2,000 calories. that is the last time I leave brownies within the oven while I nap." 50- "My boss goes to fireside the worker with the worst posture. I even have a hunch, it'd be me." 51- "Don't trust atoms, they create up everything. Did you hear about the guy who got hit within the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it had been a beverage . 52- "I was hooked in to the hokey pokey… but thankfully, I turned myself around." 53- "When I lose the TV controller, it is often hidden in some remote destination." 54- "Most people are shocked once they determine how bad i'm as an electrician." 55- "My first job was working in an fruit juice factory, but I got canned: couldn't concentrate." 56- "My mathematics teacher called me average. How mean!"

57- "Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they open their mouths."

58- "The problem isn't that obesity runs in your family. the matter is not any one runs in your family."

59- "Knowledge is power, and power corrupts. So study hard and be evil."

60- "Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars but checks when you say the paint is wet?"

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lightoftheveilfire · 6 years

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Happy holidays @wardenkader from your Secret Santa! I had so much fun writing this for @santa-age‘s Secret Santa exchange. I hope I did Annais Hawke justice, and portrayed her relationship with Sebastian well!

Sera stood outside of the War Room and kicked a small stone that had come loose from the wall. She was feeling left out, it had been her intel after all. Why was she excluded but Varric was invited with open arms? Had she been imagining everything? Was Inky pulling her leg? Getting ready to leave her?

The door swung open and Little Lady Prissypants stuck her stupid smiley face through the door. Was this it, were they going to tell her they didn't need her? That her information was worthless? This was it, she was getting kicked out of the Inquisition.

"Sera, would you mind joining us for a moment?" She asked motioning inside. Inky was standing with her arms folded, so serious, always so serious in here. General Uptight looked angry as per usual.

"I'm sorry Varric but we just can't spare the man power right now, it's out of the question." He said.

Varric disregarded Cullen and turned toward Inky, her beautiful Inky who hadn't smiled once since she walked into the room. Something was wrong.

"Common Inquisitor, we can't just abandon her! She's to important!"

"To important to the cause or to important to you?" Cullen responded sharply. That was harsh, even by Sera's standards.

"Enough." Inky said, finally turning to look at Sera "I need to know how confident you are in this information."

"Look I told you what I know. Some guy in Kirkwall overheard something and that's it. Dunno what more you want."

Inky groaned as Cullen shot her an incredulous look, he wasn't a fan it seemed. "My ravens wont be able to get through in time Inquisitor, we have to think of something else." Leliana cut in.

"Varric..." Inky said giving the dwarf a pained look.

Before she could respond he cut her off, "Look Inquistor she risked so much to help us and now we're just going to turn our backs on her? I thought the Inquisition was better than that."

"That's not fair! We don't have the resources to spare. You know how dangerous the red lyrium is and we just found the biggest source around. We can't wait." She responded sharply.

"Wait? Is the problem the storm? I can get to Kirkwall and back in a jiff if you need." Sera said, finally understanding why her Inky seemed upset. A winter storm was going to be rolling in from the south and heading north any time now. They were about to try and take Emprise du Lion and so they wouldn't be able to sacrifice any people, and Leliana's ravens would not survive the storm. Unless someone quick with connections left immediately Viscount Annais Hawke wouldn't get word of the plot on her life in time to stop it.

"Are you sure?" Inky asked softly, "I can't ask you to put yourself in danger like that."

"You don't have to dumb dumb, I know what I'm doing." She was worried, Inky was worried about her Sera.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Sera couldn't help but groan as she thought back to that conversation in the War Room. Had she really known what she was doing? In Hindsight, crossing the Waking Sea in the middle of a winter storm seemed like a huge mistake. She had been just trying to impress Inky, show her that she can do something right. Instead she was just going to freeze to death on this damned boat.

That was until land was sighted. It had been three days with the wind whipping around her, the salt-water cutting through her clothing. The captain kept saying that they would make it but Sera was certain she would die there and never see Inky again.

She bounced down the plank on to land practically jumping for joy when she hit the snow-covered ground. She didn't care about the dirty looks she was getting as she threw herself down to make a snow angel.

The winter storm that Commander Uptight had been so so worried about for his men had clearly caught up to her, and look, she was still alive. Clearly more talented than his dumb tin cans.

Varric had told her how to find the Viscount's keep so she decided it would be faster to find Hawke and warn her than it would be to find to the Red Jenny in Kirkwall, so off she went to Hightown, hopefully it would be half as fun as in Varric's dumb books. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- "What do you mean I'm not allowed in you giant ass?" She said, about to attack the guard at the gate who was preventing her from entering the Viscounts keep.

"As I said, they are preparing for the Satinalia festival so no one is allowed in. He responded, not budging for the angry woman.

"I am with the Inquisition and I have an important -" She said.

He just shook his head holding in a laugh, "look I'm sure if the Inquisition had anything of importance to say, they would have sent someone... else."

"Why you arrogant shite!" She said reaching for her bow, ready to make him regret the moment he decided to underestimate her.

" 'Scuse me Ser," a voice with a weird accent said behind her, "What is it exactly do you needed to do?"

She rounded on him, her hands falling from her bow. Hopefully he would see reason, "I have a message for Viscount Hawke from the Inquisition, and I need to tell her now yeah!"

He looked at past her at the guard "Let her go, I'll handle it."

"Oh you'll handle this alright arsehole." She growled as she followed him inside sticking her tongue out at the guard for good measure.

He pulled her back into an empty office before standing behind a large desk and gesturing for her to sit in the chair. Sera wasn't sure who this twat thought he was but she wouldn't sit if he wasn't.

When it became evident that they would both be standing, each with one keeping a hand near their bow, he spoke "So, what is this important message."

She studied him closely, dark hair pushed back behind his ears, average height, nice clothes, probably some noble arse who thought he could speak for Hawke. Well she wasn't fooled.

"Look, as I told tin can out there, I will only give my message to Hawke."

He studied her just as closely as she studied him, and as his eyes narrowed she noticed just how blue they were. He was dressed smart but was doing the Viscount's grunt work, an over eager aid maybe? A page?

"Unfortunately the Viscount is busy at the moment, as you can see Hightown is in a bit of an uproar over the party tonight."

"Look you stuffy, smooth talking, dick I don't care if you want to make yourself seem bigger by going around Hawke but I know her and I wont talk to anyone else." She said starting to get frustrated.

"I appreciate your tenacity but I think you may have misread this situation."

"Yeah? Misread this you -" She said as she started to lift her hand to flip him off.

"I am her husband and have been tasked by her personally to deal with these sort of things while she handles the nobles for the night."

Oh, her husband? Wait, didn't Varric say something about that? Some Chantry brother, and oh that would make sense of his nice clothing.

"Yer what now?"

"I am Sebastian Vael, husband of Annais Hawke, the Champion and Viscount of Kirkwall. If you have something to say, you can say it me. I am in no way trying to 'undermine' her as you said and I would really like to see anyone try such a thing with her."

Sera stiffed at that, suddenly matching the man in front of her with Varric's description, "Alright Buttercup you've met Hawke but the other person you should look out for is the Choir Boy, tall-ish you know for you I suppose but shorter than she is by a lot. Blue eyes, a depiction of Andraste in a very noticeable place. You wont be able to miss him."

"Alright... Choir Boy... Say you are her Husband tell me -"

"Varric sent you right? Tell him he still owes me ten gold for that last game of Wicked Grace and I expect him to deliver it in person." He said giving her a small smile.

"Oh yeah and Buttercup, I owe him some money too so if he asks you to pay up, don't." It was him, he could help! They could do it! They could save Hawke and Inky will be proud of her!

Over the next twenty minutes the words poured out of Sera's mouth telling him everything, from the way Inky looked as they said goodbye, to how Varric was doing, to all the information she had learned about the plot.

"And so we think it'll happen tonight, I mean yeah that makes the most sense. You have a bunch of stuffy people in masks she wont see it coming." Sera finally finished.

Sebastian was nodding along, clearly deep in thought, "Yes that does make the most sense. She has upset a lot of the nobility here given her rather... lenient view on the mage rebellion."

"So she'll stay back right? And we're good and I can go home yeah?"

He just laughed at that, "You clearly do not know my wife very well. She would not stay back from anything. If you want to leave you can, but I could use your help keeping an eye out for her at the party tonight. There are only two guards we can trust that won’t for sure have been paid off, so in total there will be four people we can trust. We'll have to be positioned strategically..." He said before drifting off and pulling out a map of the keep and looking over it thoughtfully.

"Wait, she's still going? You wont even ask her to say home?"

He just laughed again before responding, "Oh I shall ask, I shall plead with her in fact. But if I know Annais she will go anyway, her rule has been threated and so have the mages of Kirkwall. She will not stand idly by and let the guards deal with this. She is a strong and powerful woman and we would discredit her by doubting her."

Sera shook her head understanding; she would never be able to talk Inky out of something like that too. "Well Andraste's tits, I better find something to wear." ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Sera once again stood outside of the Viscount Keep, this time in a clean yellow shirt with an official invitation in her right hand. Just one of those stupid nobs try and stop her now.

A different guard let her in this time, giving her a dirty look before throwing open the door. As soon as she was inside she was swept up and taken into the ballroom by a very eager servant. The entrance to the Keep had changed dramatically since the morning. Every candle was lit, and there were wreathes and holly wrapped around the banister on the stairs that led to the ballroom. There were large red flowers placed in most corners and everything seemed to shine. They seemed to really be going all out for this party; nothing like this had ever been done at Skyhold.

Once in the Ballroom she was able to get a good view of things. It looked almost to small for the crowd, and the decorations seemed to have been hastily put up, as if it was done at the last minute. In comparison to the Foyer this room looked tacky.

Sera realized why she had been given a bad look from the guard, most of the guests seemed to be decked out in their absolute frilliest clothing and masks, everyone except the Viscount herself.

She noticed her the second she walked into the ballroom. She had seen her in Skyhold once, but here in Kirkwall she seemed even more imposing. Tall, so tall, with short blonde hair that was starting to turn white in a few places. She seemed so serious, maybe it was because Sebastian had decided to tell her everything, or maybe she was just that sort of person. She was dressed in all black except for the white gloves on her hands, and she had also forgone a mask. No frills, Sera liked her already.

A hand grabbed her elbow, startling her. She swung around ready to pummel whatever stupid noble thought she was a servant. A hand wrapped around her fist and before she struck anything important as she came face to face with Sebastian.

"Oy, don't go sneaking up on people like that or you'll lose that pretty face of yours Choir Boy!"

He just laughed, "You would have to be a lot faster to do any damage don't worry."

She growled but before she was able to respond he continued, "I filled her in on everything. Her friend Aveline the Guard Captain, and her husband Donnic are keeping the masses away from her so whoever it is wont be able to strike up close. She has a taste tester up there so she wont be poisoned. That means that it will have to be a ranged attack, probably will come when everyone is distracted by her welcome speech so it is up to us to recognize whomever it is before they shoot."

"Got it, you take the left side of the room I'll take the right. And Choir Boy, don't hesitate."

He shook his head and before disappearing into the crowd said, "You underestimate me."

Sera laughed before moving over to the food table. Sucker had let her take the half of the room with the wine and sweets. The table was decorated much like everything else, lots of sparkly lights, holly, and red flowers. The sweets were all in the shape of stars and the wine glasses had beautiful designs etched into them. They really had gone all out for this shindig.

Annais stood and started to try and quiet the crowd, Sera knew she would have to start paying attention but she wanted to grab a bite to eat first.

A young elven boy was refilling some sort of meat pie looking things before whispering, "Red Jenny prefers the honey cakes."

Her head shot up at that, "What?"

"Yes, over there. He prefers the honey cakes." He responded motioning at a noble in the center of the room whose hand was shoved deep in his pocket. She nodded at him before trying to wade through the crowd.

"Thank you all for coming out in the middle of this horrible winter storm. As tradition dictates, for Satinalia we shall choose a fool to be ruler of Kirkwall for the night!"

She had started her speech. Sera locked eyes with Sebastian from across the room and motioned towards the gentleman who was now pulling throwing knives from his pocket, clearly waiting for the right moment.

Sera started to panic, the crowd was too dense and the room to small to move. Neither of them was going to make it in time.

"And so it is my great pleasure to introduce you all to this years town fool as voted on by the people of Kirkwall from all walks of life."

As she continued he started to push his way to the front of the crowd, he was close. Sera hoped Annais had quick reflexes, because that was their only hope.

"Bador Kelly! Frequent patron of the Hanged Man and occasional shop keeper!"

His hand slid into position, here it was. Annais better be ready to dive.

Before Sera could yell, or warn her at least an arrow shot through the crowd, making a sickening thumping sound when it made contact with the back of the mans neck. Screaming erupted in the room, and the party devolving into complete chaos. Sebastian was standing in front of the only door, a bow in hand. He had shot him to protect his wife. Sera had no idea where he had gotten a bow from, but now she knew what he had meant when he had told her not to underestimate him.

A crack rang through the room, silencing the screaming. Annais had slammed her staff on the floor sending a calming feeling throughout the room. When she spoke her voice was steady and measured, no more of the fake excitement that she had shown when announcing the fool.

"Guards, will you please remove the body. My guests, if you will please join me in the Great Hall we can continue the remainder of the party there." She gestured for the guests to follow her towards the door, black skirts sweeping around her feet.

Sera jumped and tried to run over to Sebastian, but unfortunately the whole party was now trying to make it towards the door. She watched as the tall woman at the center of everything made it to her husband before they all disappeared off into the rest of the castle.

By the time Sera finally made it out of the murder room (as she was now going to forever call it) the party was back into full swing in the Foyer and the Great Hall. Both rooms had been decorated with such care and seemed to be much more fitting for the party. She realized that they had planned to catch him in the Ballroom and then move everyone elsewhere.

She found the couple talking softly at the head of the largest table in the Great Hall.

"Oh and here she is, the Inquisition agent I was telling you about." Sebastian said, ending whatever conversation they had been having until she had walked up.

"I seem to owe you a lot, thank you Sera." She was even more imposing up close and the small smile that graced her lips made her knees go weak. She was so much taller than any other woman she had ever seen. Her blue eyes seemed to cut right through Sera's skin deep into her soul stripping her bare. No wonder Inky had liked her so much when she had visited. She was the only woman who would probably be able to go toe to toe with her in a fight.

"You should really be thanking the servants of Kirkwall, yeah. Keep treating your people right and they'll have your back." She responded as the band started up behind them.

"Please sit, enjoy yourself while you're here." Annais said before whispering into Sebastian’s ear again.

Sera dug into the feast in front of her, excited for stuffed hog in the middle of the table.

"If you'll excuse us," Sebastian said standing and reaching a hand out for Annais, "I think after a long night it is time for a dance."

Sera watched as Hawke smiled and let him lead her to the floor. The two slid easily into each other’s arms, clearly experienced at dancing together. Annais was quite a bit taller than Sebastian but he still managed to sweep her off of her feet as they twirled gently across the dance floor. They didn't take their eyes off of each other as they spun, totally lost in the feeling of being together after a long hard day.

Sera felt a growing knot of jealousy building up in her stomach, dreaming back to the Winter Palace a month earlier where she and Inky had done the same thing. Not a care in the world of who was watching, or the chaos that had just been quelled. Just feeling safe in the arms of her lover. She could tell that was how Annais and Sebastian felt as they danced the night away, sharing soft kisses every now and then, and ignoring the rest of the party.

Sera decided in that moment that she didn't care how important it was, she would never leave her Inky's side ever again. As soon as she got home she would not waste one more moment before telling her how she felt. They would never miss another dance together ever again. She would end up just as happy and Hawke and Sebastian no matter what.

As she leapt up from the table and ran out of the room the couple yelled after her, "Wait where are you going?"

She looked back at them and grinned, "Going back to Skyhold to do something I should have done a long time ago."

#santaage2017 #Sera #Annais Hawke #sebastian vael #I had so much fun writing this #I hope you like it!#my writing #dragon age

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surayajasmine · 6 years

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15 Things To Live By When In High School

I decided to make this list of things that I should have done before, during my first year in high school and take it into account sincerely. Anyways, I think it’s important that I share it with everyone.

1: Forgiving is SO important. And, I don’t mean the meaningless, insincere type of forgiveness that you say to your friends, just because it makes them feel better about themselves. Sometimes, you need them to feel guilty about what they’ve done and learn to gain that trust to redeem from their mistakes. And, forgiving people makes you stronger, mentally, and it gives you a sense of maturity, instead of holding unnecessary grudges.

2. Happiness isn’t CONSTANT. What does that mean? Well, it means that being happy all the time, in front of your peers or crowd in school, is okay. But, if you’re feeling down, there’s no need to hide it, because we all have our bad days. Let it out if you’re feeling down. No shame in releasing some steam. Just make sure to get back on track ASAP.

3: To care OR not to care. Why would you want to spend your high school life, pretending to be the cool and snobby one, and pretending to not give a shit about others? At the same time, why would you even pay attention to those who talk bad about you? What I should have done in school is to actually care about those who matter to me, who are kind to me, who help me in any way. Those people are the ones worth caring about. It’s hard to ignore the buzz in the background about you, but, trust me, taking the high road makes you the better person, regardless of how much it stings. Eventually, what goes around, comes around. Karma will give them a taste of their own medicine.

4: Parents play a HUGE role in your life From what I’ve known, plenty of my schoolmates aren’t close to their parents, or maybe their parents disagree with them on something. Guys, believe me when I say this, your parents are almost always right. I used to think that was freaking ridiculous, until I considered the consequences of my actions from their point of view. Imagine this; Your child, only daughter, sneaking behind your back to spend the lunch money you gave her on shopping, and seeing boys behind your back. If we were the child, we’d think it’s nothing harmful, it’s just shopping and dating. But, from your parents’ eyes, you are spending their hard earned money on items that you don’t need, and you’re betraying their trust. To earn our parents trust, is to understand their situation, talk to them, be honest (seriously, guys, it’s so important), respect their choices, and think rationally and maturely. Someday, we’ll have kids of our own and what we do now, could potentially be a reflection of ourselves when we misbehaved during our teen years. Don’t push your parents away. And, do what you can to bond with them. Family is first.

5: CLEAN, clean, clean. Do whatever it takes to maintain a good appearance and surroundings. Deodorant, brushing teeth and face wash are a MUST. Firstly, why would you not wear deodorant to school, where you’ll be spending nearly 7-8 hours in such an environment. Your body odour is a big no-no. To not brush your teeth is very disgusting, cause your morning breath definitely doesn’t smell like Chanel perfume, so, never skip brushing teeth, even if you’re running late. A messy appearance isn’t the way to go. Try your best to have a good overall cleanliness. Shave, brush, shower, etc. After all, you’re a teen and you undergo some insane hormonal changes. Best to look good and feel good.

6: REST your mind and body. We’re growing teens, therefore, sleep is so important to us. Yes, I like sleep as much as the next person, but oversleeping isn’t good either. I know people who don’t get enough rest every night, so, when school starts the next day, the coffee fiesta has begun, and the dozing off students.

7. LEARN TO SAY NO. They force you to take some illegal shit and it’s against your values and morals. Say no. They want you to be their lap dog and cover their asses for them when they’re wrong. Say no. When someone pushes you around, and thinks they can get away. Hell nah. You own it darling and show em how it’s done.

8. COOKING is a lifesaver. Okay let’s be honest here, I’ve had my disasters in the kitchen too many times. Like I’ve accidentally burnt instant noodles in the microwave. (don’t ask me how. I was only 7 years old and hungry af). Cooking will go a long way. You will find yourself one day cooking for yourself in college, in the kitchenette. It’s best to learn how to cook at an early age, at least get some basics of some simple recipes to help you when you’re off to universities or whatever. Even when you move out into your own place, you have to make use of the kitchen, and not always buy food or order outside. You gotta spend wisely. Start cooking even in high school. You’ll learn and master it, trust me, you will need it.

9. Spend your CASH wisely. Just because you have pocket money, or your parents give you lunch money, or even your own earnings from a part time job, doesn’t mean you HAVE TO SPEND IT. You see that top that you really like? But costs an arm and leg? Don’t splurge on it! Save that dough up for some other good shit that you really need. Like money to get a place of your own someday. Or some cash to get you by when things are rough. Or even money to pay for your own college funds. Things are hella expensive these days, and we have to think of how to save it, so we can use it for the right times.

10. GET A PART TIME JOB. Yeah, I can’t seem to emphasise this enough, but, you guys are on the road to adulthood. And, to NOT have the experience of what a working environment is like… That’s criminal. It’s good to have some exposure to what the real world is, for instance, booking appointments for clients, doing some hard labour, etc. You have to start somewhere. Corporate world is all about hiring young adults with experience. But, if you don’t have the least idea of what a working world is, it can be difficult to find a job that is suitable for you.

. 11. Not everyone you are FRIENDS WITH WILL LAST FOREVER. As harsh as it may sound, it’s the truth. Just because you are friends with them now in high school, doesn’t mean it’ll work out when you guys graduate and ship off to other ends of the world to earn that degree. Nope. You will grow apart after sometime. You will notice the distance of the conversations you share. It’s normal and there’s nothing to be scared of. Some people just don’t vibe with you, or maybe you realise that you deserve better. It’s okay.

12. Enjoy high school while you can. I’m going to be a senior soon and, it made me realise how much I’m going to miss high school. Ya sure. It sucked so much for me at certain points because people can be a bunch of dicks. No surprise there. But, where else are you gonna get an experience of high school? I’m gonna miss the high school food the most, cause it rocks. I’ll miss the insane practices I had to go through every day after school. You wont get anything like this when you’re an adult. So, being in high school has its ups and downs. But above all, there is some fun in it. And, you may not notice it now, but when you approach your last days of high school, it’ll hit you.

13. BE KIND High school is not a Mean Girls movie where you can just put everything in a Burn Book. Yeah, okay, that person pissed you off, but to go out and have vengeance on that person and get yourself in trouble too? Nope. Don’t be that person. As hard as it may seem, you have to be kind to the people you don’t want to be with at all. Even if they’ve hurt your feelings. Or even threw you aside like you were nothing. It’s painful. But, it’ll give you the strength to pick yourself up and move on and grow into the gorgeous human being. Patience is key.

14. Go easy on the PARTIES. Everyone loves a good party. Including yours truly. But, you have to put some limits on how hard you party. Don’t overdo yourself and don’t do anything you are forced into. It’s a big no-no. There’s a thing called partying too hard, and it will take a toll on your mind and body. It’s terrible and I’ve witnessed someone going through a tough time the next day in school. It was horrible. Go for the parties that are worth going to. Like birthday parties. Christmas. New year’s. Just as long as you are aware of your surroundings, but still having the time of your life. Be a good but careful party animal.

15. A GOOD PLAYLIST CURES ALL. You sure as hell don’t wanna go through the bad days of high school with a terrible playlist. The wrong song can set your mood from 100-0 in no time flat. Listening to Coldplay has definitely helped me survive dark days of heartache and perked me up on a good day. Make playlists for different situations like studying, exercising, relaxing, etc. (However I do not recommend putting a sad playlist when you are in the middle of a breakup. That’s gonna make you feel worse.) But, do put songs that perk up your day. As well as songs to release your frustration. And don’t be afraid to dance or sing along to the songs. Why else would you make such an incredible playlist?

Those are pretty much my tips and advice on high school. And, it might not work for everyone else. But I hope it does. It did work out for me. I’ve been through some painful shit in high school, but thankfully I am doing well now. It’s not only to help you with high school, but it’ll shape your character into the better version of the person you are now. That’s all from me.

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foreign-feelings · 7 years

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WARNING - Long post

I see a lot of stupid fucking shit on facebook but this is by far the most outrageous classist white people bullshit in a long time. The below was posted to a persons facebook that I went to school with. While I believe there should be limits and regulation to government help this is just appalling!!

“PUT ME IN CHARGE . . .

Put me in charge of food stamps. I'd get rid of Lone Star cards; no cash for Ding Dongs or Ho Ho's, just money for 50-pound bags of rice and beans, blocks of cheese and all the powdered milk you can haul away. If you want steak and frozen pizza, then get a job.

Put me in charge of Medicaid. The first thing I'd do is to get women Norplant birth control implants or tubal legations. Then, we'll test recipients for drugs, alcohol, and nicotine. If you want to reproduce or use drugs, alcohol, or smoke, then get a job.

Put me in charge of government housing. Ever live in a military barracks? You will maintain our property in a clean and good state of repair. Your home" will be subject to inspections anytime and possessions will be inventoried. If you want a plasma TV or Xbox 360, then get a job and your own place.

In addition, you will either present a check stub from a job each week or you will report to a "government" job. It may be cleaning the roadways of trash, painting and repairing public housing, whatever we find for you. We will sell your 22 inch rims and low profile tires and your blasting stereo and speakers and put that money toward the "common good.."

Before you write that I've violated someone's rights, realize that all of the above is voluntary. If you want our money, accept our rules. Before you say that this would be "demeaning" and ruin their "self esteem," consider that it wasn't that long ago that taking someone else's money for doing absolutely nothing was demeaning and lowered self esteem.

If we are expected to pay for other people's mistakes we should at least attempt to make them learn from their bad choices. The current system rewards them for continuing to make bad choices.

AND While you are on Gov't subsistence, you no longer can VOTE! Yes, that is correct. For you to vote would be a conflict of interest. You will voluntarily remove yourself from voting while you are receiving a Gov't welfare check. If you want to vote, then get a job.

Now, if you have the guts - PASS IT ON...”

the so many levels of fuckedness are unreal.

because being poor means I've made mistakes and bad choices.

So let me get this straight? Me, myself, personally, a young 19 year old girl in an abusive relationship is raped and becomes pregnant because I didn’t have the insurance to have or afford birth control.

I grew up christian and am told that I am a murderer if I have an abortion so I have the baby.

I work my ass off at a retail job to save all my money and my car breaks down so I have to spend my savings on a car that I don’t know if i’ll be able to make payments on so I can keep my job. Not to mention my job will not offer any sort of savings or pay for maternity leave.

I apply for WIC. I’m living with my parents and paying them rent but because i’m living there. WIC will allow me to buy milk, block cheese, dry beans, some vegetables, fruit juice and formula. I try to survive and live off this “WIC DIET” and my OBGYN says im not healthy and my milk supply will stop if I don’t eat more variety of food and nutrients. I have to start working overtime to afford my babysitter, my groceries, my medicine from my childbirth, and my car and insurance. WIC is not enough to sustain me so I apply for food stamps and I get a lone star card and can actually afford to buy produce and other foods.

Im healthier, my baby is healthier. Im able to pay all my bills on time but my parents are tired of their daughter living in their home with a crying baby. I apply for government living (Section 8 housing) I provide everything I have and I am accepted and given a move in date. I can barely afford to live in the apartments and have bills ect. so I find a better paying job.

Because I have a better paying job my food stamps are taken away and my child no longer applies for government help bc of his age and my income.

I understand wanting to make changes and regulations. I understand there has to be rules in place. The system is broken though and it punishes people who ask for help. Not to mention people find out you're getting government assistance in ANY WAY and you’re looked at like a lesser being. (At least where im from.)

The system WANTS you to stay broke and poor. You try to use their help to get you by until you can do better and you’re practically punished for it.

Just because someone is struggling doesn’t mean they should live their life without entertainment or material things. If they have a lot of overtime and have all their bills paid why shouldn’t they splurge on a game console or a nicer TV? If I got a bonus for meeting my quota why can’t I purchase a nice computer/laptop? Why can’t someone use their hard earned money towards feeling better about themselves and giving them a simple pleasure. Just because someone is poor doesn’t mean their life should be void of all pleasure or happiness. That is a foolish outlook and down right evil imo.

I suppose someone could argue that I shouldn’t have gotten pregnant or I should’ve had an abortion or I shouldn’t have been in a relationship with an asshole.

Yeah all of those things may have prevented me from struggling but there are people out there that are sick, handicapped, deformed, mentally ill, autistic and all other kinds of situations that can’t get a job or keep a job. My Uncle is deaf, considered autistic and is deformed. He faces prejudice every place he goes to look for a job. He had a job at a grocery store for a long time but that wasn’t a good environment for him. He got a warehouse job and was harassed mercilessly until he was forced to quit. He had a job at a prison but they treated him with disrespect and he was “laid off” for a bullshit reason. He is now almost 50 and living off social security bc he can’t get a job and people wont hire you if your deaf without a hearing aid because of safety reasons. At least in Texas anyway. And he can’t get his hearing aid because he doesn’t have insurance without a job. Fucked up right?

People that have never had to struggle or don’t know someone who has struggled will never understand. They won’t understand. I didn’t fully understand till I was in it. I’m glad I did because where I am now and how far i’ve come and how hard I've worked for it has made me a stronger person. It’s turned me into a more grateful and thankful person than what I was as a teen. It’s also made me more compassionate and less judging of others in “bad” situations.

I don’t have the fucking patience for shit like this. I have never unfriended someone so fast in all my god damn life.

If you think like this just fucking unfollow me.

I don’t want anything to do with that shit attitude. Thanks.

#personal #rant #poor #class #classist #governement assistance #so unbelieveable #there's a lot more wrong than just the things I pointed out #but my brain can only handle so much bullshit at one time #please feel free to add

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themusingsofacurlyhairednerd · 7 years

Text

All My Friends Are Heathens; Part 9

{ Part 8 }

{ Master List }

Summary: Octavia attempts to get the gang to start their own society in the woods in order to ditch school, Lincoln spills the beans about Bellamy having a date, cars are stolen, Clarke’s failing at being the Mom-friend... the usual delinquent nonsense ;)

*Delinquent group chat*

TheSuperiorBlake: who wants to abandon all adult responsibilities and create a Amazonian-like society in the woods with me??

i-make-it-go-boom: is this a Wonder Woman scenario where no men are invited BECAUSE SIGN ME TF UP

Murphy is getting on my last nerve

Jaaaaaasssssppper: Wonder Woman was a spiritual experience, I’ll dress in drag and do the hula if you let me in

Guns&Roses: Make him do the truffle shuffle

TrashPrince: U FALL ASLEEP THROUGH ONE SKYPE CALL AND SUDDENLY UR RELATIONSHIP IS ON THE ROCKS

Trikru: OCTAVIA MY LOVE MY LIFE YOU WOULD LEAVE ME??? WHAT HAPPENED TO FOREVER? OUR HAPPY ENDING?? :’( :’(

MillertheKiller: Lincoln, babe, don’t cry

I’ll be ur boo

TheSuperiorBlake: paws off Miller!!!

NurseGriffin: I’m listening

Greenbean: BELL UR GIRL IS TRYING TO LEAVE U OCTAVIA IS BREAKING UP OUR FAMILY

TheSuperiorBlake: everyone is invited you meatheads I just don’t want to study

Jaaaaaasssssppper: Cool cool

is booze involved then?

HeadbandWonder: ah come on! I don’t want to share a tent with anyone that smells like a gym locker :’(

NurseClarke: Guess we’re all sharing a tent with Bellamy ‘cause the rest of u guys smell like old socks

Bellamy smells like a forest after a light rain <3

TheSuperiorBlake: that’s oddly specific

MillertheKiller: Speaking of the freckled wonder... r shirts optional? Bellamy has abs that need to be appreciated

Trikru: that’s Clarke’s job

Iliad: Listen you toadstools I’m in the middle of a meeting

If you’re going to compliment my physique at least wait until I’m available to appreciate the praise

Jaaaaaasssssppper: I vote to kick Bellamy out of our Amazon club he uses too many big words

TrashPrince: Seconded

Trikru: He can’t join anyway

He’s too busy with his new beau ;)

Greenbean: DAD HOW COULD U CHEAT ON MOM LIKE THIS???

Guns&Roses: WAIT IT’S NOT CLARKE?????????????

MOM SAY IT ISN’T SO????????????

Jaaaaassssppper: UR TEARING THIS FAMILY A PART U MONSTER

TrashPrince: I’M THE GARBAGE CAN OF THIS FAMILY YOU CAN’T JUST WALTZ IN AND TAKE MY PLACE LIKE THIS!!!

TheSuperiorBlake: IF IT’S THAT TRICK ASS BITCH ECHO AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL MAKE THAT PIECE OF SHIT DISAPPEAR

Iliad:

Meeting!!!!!!!!!

i-make-it-go-boom: Mom did u know about this???

Greenbean: r u sad?

Jasper and I will make u brownies

And give u hugs

Jaaaaaasssssppper: we’ll wrap u in blankets and take care of u mom UNLIKE SMELLAMY YOU SHITBRICK

NurseGriffin: guys I’m fine

TrashPrince: LIES

TheSuperiorBlake: u guys leave her alone

She’s in the first step of recovery: Denial

NurseGriffin: I’m not in denial you meatheads

MillertheKiller: only someone in denial would say that

TrashPrince: As someone who has gone to therapy several times, I can say with all authority that mommy dearest is indeed in denial

i-make-it-go-boom: as a certified mechanic, I’m obligated to fix this AND FIX IT I SHALL

BELLAMY BRADBURY BLAKE GET UR EFFECTS IN ORDER BECAUSE I’M ABOUT TO BITCH SLAP UR SORRY ASS INTO NEXT YEAR!!

TrashPrince: GRAB UR PITCHFORKS MEN

MillertheKiller: I’LL LIGHT THE TORCHES

Jaaaaaassssppper: LET’S KILL THE BEAST!

Greenbean: wut?

Jaaaaassssppper: I thought we were quoting that beauty and the beast song

i-make-it-go-boom: I GET TO BE THE ONE WHO BREAKS DOWN THE DOOR WITH A BATTERING RAM!!

TheSuperiorBlake: this convo really got away from me

TrashPrince: #knockbellamyintonextyear2k17

Guns&Roses: FOR NARNIA AND CLARKE’S HONOR

HeadbandWonder: let’s hit him where it hurts!!

TrashPrince: I’m suggesting a mob and all u want to do is kick him in the junk?? UR uninvited from our mob Harper

HeadbandWonder: I MEANT THE LIBRARY THE TRUE LOVE OF HIS LIFE U DONUTHOLE

TrashPrince: fine ur re-invited BUT UR ON THIN ICE

*Operation Fake Out*

NurseGriffin: listen i know you’re in a meeting and everything, but we should probs tell them we’re “dating” before they kill you

Iliad: Oh I’m not actually in a meeting

I went to get us coffee, I was gonna stop by your house and surprise you, but I didn’t realize until I got there that I left my wallet back at the library. -_-

I just said I was in a meeting so I didn’t have to respond to their idiocy

NurseGriffin: awwwwwwww!! <3 who’s the best fake bf ever?

Iliad: Chris Evans probably

Any of the Chris’s really

But I’ll happily take second place ;)

Anyway... once I get my wallet I’ll bring you coffee and we can talk about when we’re going to let them “catch” us on a date.

NurseGriffin: Just make it fast, Murphy’s trying to start a mob

Iliad: Copy that, Princess

*Delinquents*

Trikru: u know what would be more fun than a mob?? Inviting Bellamy and his gf to dinner so we can get to know them

i-make-it-go-boom: pass

MillertheKiller: hard pass

besides I already broke the driver’s side window on bellamy’s rover

NurseGriffin: U WHAT?????

TrashPrince: WE MUST DEFEND CLARKE’S HONOR

MillertheKiller: Can’t talk I’ve stolen the rover Bellamy can’t escape

GET HIM BOYS AND BADASS LADIES WHO GENUINELY TERRIFY ME

TheSuperiorBlake: Miller is the leader our amazon society doesn’t deserve but desperately needs

TrashPrince: NOT ALL HEROES WEAR CAPES

NurseGriffin: pls tell me this isn’t real

i-make-it-go-boom: come pick me up!! I’ll repaint it and change the plates so the cops can’t find it

Jaaaaaaasssssppper: Monty and I will wipe away all fingerprints

But within a month will have to ditch the car at the Mexican border, change our names, and start brand new lives in Canada from here on out you will call me Reginald!!

Guns&Roses: I want to be Harper

TheSuperiorBlake: I call dibs on being Murphy I’ve always wanted to be a sarcastic asshole with no concern for anyone’s feelings

TrashPrince: u r a sarcastic asshole with no concern for anyone’s feelings

TheSuperiorBlake: feeling real attacked right now

Trikru: square up Murphy

NurseGriffin: listen here children of Satan

Jaaaaaaaassssppper: rude

TrashPrince: fair

NurseGriffin: Being Bellamy's car back and leave money for the broken window in the glove box OR SO HELP ME I WILL CALL ALL OF YOUR MOTHERS

TheSuperiorBlake: jokes on u I don't have a mother

Guns&Roses: this just got real sad real quick

NurseGriffin: don't bullshit me Octavia Blake

We all know Indra is ur step-mother

TheSuperiorBlake: INDRA IS MY BADASS FAIRY GODMOTHER WHO TURNED ME INTO A KICKASS WARRIOR PRINCESS WHO DOMINATES THE SOCCER FIELD UNDEFEATED U COW I WONT STAND HERE AND WATCH HER BE DISRESPECTED LIKE THIS

NurseGriffin: GIVE BELLAMY BACK HIS CAR

MillertheKiller: NOT UNTIL U ADMIT U LOVE HIM

Greenbean: speaking of the freckled wonder...

He's taking this rather well

TrashPrince: Doubtful

He probably had a heart attack in the middle of his meeting He's probably being resuscitated as we speak

*Operation Fake Out*

NurseGriffin: Bellamy, the platonic love of my life

U beautiful cinnamon roll

my pseudo lover

Iliad: Is this about my rover?

NurseGriffin: Oh so u are still getting the group messages?

Iliad: Getting them? I crawled into the back of my car to grab a book I needed to return while I was back at the library and APPARENTLY MILLER DIDN’T SEE ME AND HAS STOLEN MY CAR WITH ME IN IT!!

NurseGriffin: OMG

FOR REAL??

Iliad: No I just like being a drama queen

OF COURSE I’M FOR RHDKWNFIJINWIFJUP

sorry, I hit my head on the seat when miller hit a speed bump

NurseGriffin: I’m calling Kane

Iliad: Please don’t. I don’t want to have to explain why Miller’s blood is all over my car.

NurseGriffin: Bellamy I love you, but I’m not waiting for you to get out of prison if you murder Nathan.

Iliad: After all we’ve been through??

I’m hurt Clarke

NurseGriffin: Our fake relationship is not built to survive prison

Iliad: You’re supposed to be my ride of die!

NurseGriffin: ur about to die riding in your stolen car without a seat belt

*IceIceBaby direct messaged Iliad*

IceIceBaby: why is ur car speeding through the school parking lot like it’s a Fast & Furious moment?

AND WHY WASN’T I INVITED TO RUN FROM CAMPUS SECURITY IN THIS EPIC MOMENT DUDE!!

Iliad: because i’m not driving my car

IceIceBaby: damn dude

ur missing out then

I’ll put the video on facebook for u

Iliad: my hero -_-

*Operation Fake Out*

Iliad: Clarke listen

Miller is driving my car so fast I can hear pieces falling off

Campus security has been chasing us for eight blocks

The entire Arkadia police force is probably gonna be here any second with a helicopter and I will inevitably be shot out the windshield like a rocket in the next few minutes

So in case I go out like a human bullet, there’s something I gotta tell you

NurseGriffin: Is this about the time u cheated off me in math?

Iliad: That never happened

And if it did, I wouldn’t waste my final breath on it

I’ll pay for that *hypothetical* sin in the afterlife

Iliad: I really didn’t want to tell you like this

I had it all planned you know

We were gonna go to the botanical garden and I was going to sit you down in a secluded little spot and tell you... which sounds kind of cliche now that I’m saying it.

I don’t know, I guess I always pictured it surrounded by flowers so I could tell you they didn’t compare to you

NurseGriffin: what’s happening right now?

Are you proposing to me?

Iliad: Clarke I’m in love with you

For real

I kinda, sorta, suggested the fake date thing so you’d see I could be a good boyfriend and maybe, you know, wanna date for real.

NurseGriffin: u tried to trick me into dating u??

Iliad: Not mfhrnedifnrkfkj

NurseGriffin: O MY GOD BELLAMY ARE YOU OKAY????

BELLAMY??

*Delinquents*

MillertheKiller: ABORT MISSION

ABORT MISSION

OH MY GOD I’M GOING TO DIE

SAVE YOURSELVES!!!!!

TheSuperiorBlake: what’s happening?

Iliad: MILLER DROVE MY FREAKING CAR INTO A POLE TO AVOID CAMPUS SECURITY

WHILE I WAS IN THE BACKSEAT

HE’S NOW RUNNING DOWN THE BLOCK SCREAMING

HE HAS 5 SECONDS BEFORE I TEAR HIM LIMB FROM LIMB

maybe a little longer, I hit my head really hard and then threw up climbing out the back window

NurseGriffin: why aren’t u answering my texts u jackass???!!!

i thought u were dead!!!

u can’t just tell me u love me and then not respond to my texts!!!

Greenbean: BELLAMY TOLD U HE LOVES U????

Guns&Roses: wait, but aren’t u dating someone new???

Trikru: i was trying to tell u that he was going out with clarke but NO ONE WAS LISTENING!!

TheSuperiorBlake: YOU KNEW AND DIDN’T TELL ME???

Trikru: i mean he never actually admitted anything but i had my suspicions

TheSuperiorBlake: all the guys minus jasper and monty are uninvited from the Amazon society

Lincoln especially

TrashPrince: WHAT DID I DO??

TheSuperiorBlake: i don’t know

and i don’t care

NurseGriffin: guy!!! not now!

Bellamy are u ok?

Iliad: i can smell colors

everything tastes like blood

NurseGriffin: where are u? I’m coming to get u

Iliad: don’t know

everything is spinning

MillertheKiller: two miles outside of Arkadia

can u get me too?

NurseGriffin: walk u cretin!!

u almost killed Bellamy

this is ur punishment

NurseGriffin: Bellamy stay where u are! I’m coming to get u!

Iliad: oh is it time for our coffee date already?

NurseGriffin: no ur going to the hospital

Iliad: not as fun but probably for the best

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