#i would say web weaving but there's not a lot of web weaving happening

[wikipedie]

grief is like a really ugly couch

I think grief is like a really ugly couch. It never goes away. You can decorate around it; you can slap a doily on top of it; you can push it to the corner of the room—but eventually, you learn to live with it. ― Jodi Picoult, Leaving Time

#the mentalist #quotes #patrick jane #i would say web weaving but there's not a lot of web weaving happening #initially I also had a bit of an essay accompanying this but it disappeared because of a tumblr glitch + my own stupidity #and i'm too tired to write it prettily but i still wanna write it so it'll be in the tags #a cute little fun surprise for whoever cares about and reads tags #so i made a different post talking about jane's grief but i was upset i didn't have enough space for the couch (pun unintended) #and i was thinking this morning about this quote and jane's couch and how it could be interpreted as a physical manifestation of his grief #as well as his willingness to open up to people #1. i love grief; grief is important to me. grief is permanent and i have been aware of grief in a form of another (in my own personal life) #for a very very very long time. so to see it in this show is...significant to me. i cherish this #now onto the actual analyzing. of course they never intended the couch to be a symbol for grief; but it becomes so. #he leans on the couch when he opens the Red John files; for support most likely - and it's a beginning of the process of dealing with grief #he is the only one who uses the couch. everyone knows it as jane's couch #in S4E23 Cho uses it briefly to rest and Rigsby asks him if Jane knows he's using his couch #Erica tries briefly (also in S4) to sit on the couch but he doesn't allow her the space #in fact the only two people we see that use the couch are Teresa Lisbon and Dennis Abbott #and this is the part about emotional availability. he only shares the couch with people whom he trusts #With Lisbon twice even #the couch is grief and the couch is love; the couch is support #there's nostalgia for the CBI times but there's also more to it #and that quote makes me go absolutely feral because #'eventually you learn to live with it' 😭 eventually you learn to live with grief and eventually you learn to accept it as part from yself #andand he is happy to see the couch; he missed the couch #-> you are not free from your grief but in healing you learn that it's okay; you cherish your grief; it was there with you and for you #yea anyways i will never not go mad about grief and trauma and how it's portrayed and handled. #and i already have 2 more sorta-proper essays that i want to write on the topic asdgfhdhjk. yea i'm literally not gonna stop

[fideidefenswhore]

the downfall and execution of a tudor queen (2023) / the boleyns: a scandalous family (2021) / the king's pearl: henry viii and his daughter mary (2017), melita thomas / anne boleyn (tv miniseries 2021) / the mirror and the light (2024) / elizabeth (1998)

#web weaving #sort of? #i never feel like my edits really fit #they're more like collages #anyway...me on my island with the one other tudor fan that liked AB 2021 lol #'our expectations were low but holy fuck' sounds like a lot of consternation about a pretty...solid script? #what i loved most about it was moments like the above #the ability to summarize really complex dynamics borne of circumstance #in such a way that you can believe in the world and it serves as its own 'previously on' that a miniseries inherently lacks #esp when it only covers five crucial months #tl; dr there's a lot of smugness evident in many books of this genre #when it comes to anne's attitude towards her stepdaughter #bcus she was quote proven wrong unquote; becaues mary got quote the last laugh unquote... #when really. as per the quotes i've been posting #it doesn't seem like mary's reconciliation with her father was the idyll many have made it #thus we have anne's letter #and offer. knowing that others are offering her better futures #but saying this is the best future you could have. limited time only. #and it seems the future proved her right; not wrong (at least the immediate future) #bcs while matters; had she accepted; might not've been substantially better than they were under the auspices of a 'more gentle' stepmother #it also doesn't really seem like they would have been substantially worse #anne was right that her enemy's supporters wanted her disgraced and/or dead. she was right in that they wanted elizabeth disgraced #and/or dead. she couldn't have predicted what happened to herself in the exact matter it did- mainly bcus it was unprecedented #but it seems she had a pretty clear view of what mary was doing: playing both sides. attempting to ingratiate herself to her father while #also conspiring against him. and she knew it would have been better to have her on side #(and in a more jaundiced view: have her where she could watch what she was doing; who she was seeing) #but perhaps underestimated how impossible it would be to get her there in the first place #('on side' ; that is. not at court. although probably not that either. with the conditions she demanded) #but her fears of mary were not paranoia. they seem to have been grounded in realism #and a clear view of the situation at home and abroad

[suugarbabe]

I’m OBSESSED WITH UR FICS OMG- can u do a Mattheo or Theodore FIC x Reader based off of karma?! LOVERRRRR

Hii anon!

Sorry it's been a minute since you asked this :( I'm not super good at lyric fics but I did try my best so if it's shite dont come for me 😬

pairing: Theo Nott x reader

warnings: angst angst angst, no happy ending

You're talking shit for the hell of it

Addicted to betrayal, but you're relevant

You're terrified to look down

'Cause if you dare, you'll see the glare

Of everyone you burned just to get there

It's coming back around

You did your best to walk through the halls with your head high, but you could still hear the whispers of others around you as you passed. In the beginning it absolutely crushed you to know that Theo was saying awful things about you. You never thought the man that kissed you so softly, or wiped away tears from your cheek would be the one to inflict so much pain that the tears were because of him. 

The thing was, you were really happy with Theo in the thick of it, you didn’t understand where things were starting to go wrong when they did. About two months ago, when you were still together, Theo started being…distant. He all of a sudden wanted to study alone, was doing extra time on the quidditch pitch and going to bed early. 

You felt like you couldn’t be too mad at him for these things, end of term exams were coming up before winter holiday, and Theo was really serious about his studies. And to be honest, a lot of your study sessions ended up well…studying human anatomy (which was not a real subject at Hogwarts). 

And Slytherins quidditch team had gotten a new chaser recently, so Theo wanting to spend some extra time doing that didn’t seem off, he was essentially the lead chaser, and with good reason. You figured the combination of extra studying and extra quidditch was why he was so exhausting and going to bed early. 

You were definitely sad he was being distant, but were doing your best to play it off. Apparently you weren’t doing that good of a job as one night Theo had gotten particularly snappy with you. 

“What’s wrong with you?” he asked it without even looking up from his textbook. It was a rare occasion that he was actually studying with you in the common room. You shook your head, “Nothing’s wrong Theo, I’m glad we’re doing this together.” 

He left a puff of air through his nose, “W’dya mean, we always study together.” 

“I-I just meant you’ve been studying alone a lot lately, I’ve just…missed this with you,” you didn’t know why your voice was a little shaky. He wasn’t normally like this with you.

“You know you don’t have to be by my side all the time? I can have space to myself too,” Theo started packing away his things.

“I-I know, Theo, I wasn’t - I didn’t mean…” you trailed off, not sure what to say. 

“You know what, I'm just going to go to bed, guess I’ll see you tomorrow.” You watched him walk away from you, up the stairs, down the dorm halls. You don’t think he even noticed that he showed you zero affection before he left. Didn’t tell you he loves you like he always did, didn’t even kiss you. 

Spider-boy, king of thieves

Weave your little webs of opacity

My pennies made your crown

Trick me once, trick me twice

Don't you know that cash ain't the only price?

It's coming back around

You were starting to get used to Theo not really being there. It seemed like the only time he ever gave you attention was at meal times, and you figured that was only because his friends were your friends and vice versa. You dared not make any forms of PDA unless Theo initiated it. You stopped doing that last week when you felt him tense up grabbing his hand in the hall. 

You weren’t completely oblivious. You knew something was going on, but you just didn’t know what, or why. However two weeks ago you got the confirmation you never wanted. It happened later after dinner. Theo told you he had to go to the quidditch pitch to help train the new chaser again. However you happened to run into said chaser, quite literally, as you were headed back to the common room. 

You had turned the corner quickly, stuck in your head about everything going on in your relationship and not paying attention to where you were going. That’s when you slammed into a strong chest, arms grabbing hold of you so you didn’t fall down. 

When you looked up, you saw the face of the very person your boyfriend was supposed to be with. “W-why aren’t you with Theo?” 

He looked confused by your question so you continued, “Aren’t you supposed to be on the pitch with him? You’ve been training with him for like the last two weeks.” 

His face fell, “Sweetheart…we haven’t done any training together since I joined the team.” Your chest was tight, like someone had hold of your heart and was squeezing the blood from it. 

“I-erm, I have to go,”. You pushed away from him, walking quickly back to the dorms. He called after you but you didn’t hear him. It was like the blood squeezed from your heart was rushing to your brain making you deaf. 

You found yourself walking to Theo’s dorm instead of yours, wanting to confront him and not delay the inevitable any longer. 

But that’s when you caught him. Caught him right in the act. As soon as you opened the door you saw him, naked and tangled with someone else. His eyes locked with yours, and there was no remorse. 

You closed the door behind you, he didn’t even follow you. You saw the girl he was with go towards the girls dorm. She avoided your gaze. At least she felt guilty.

You stayed in the common room, hoping maybe Theo would try and find you. Try and give you an explanation, but he never came. 

'Cause karma is my boyfriend (karma is my boyfriend)

Karma is a god

Karma is the breeze in my hair on the weekend (weekend)

Karma's a relaxing thought

Aren't you envious that for you it's not?

Sweet like honey, karma is a cat

Purring in my lap 'cause it loves me

Flexing like a goddamn acrobat

Me and karma vibe like that

It was Enzo who found you that night. Enzo who asked you why you were crying and what was wrong. Who swore to you he didn’t know what Theo was up to and offered to hex him if it would make you feel better. 

You found yourself spending more time with him. It got your mind off Theo and he was treating you so kindly. 

Surprisingly Theo seemed bothered by your new interactions. But you didn’t care, he lost that right when he did what he did. 

When he started rumors about you being the one who cheated with Enzo instead of the truth, you were hurt. But Enzo was there for you, wiping your tears and letting you cry on his shoulder. 

He told you that it didn’t matter to him and he would stick by your side the whole way. So today, when whispers and conversations were still happening around you, you held your head high. 

You walked by Theo in the corridor, his eyes trained on you the whole way as you walked up to Enzo. He greeted you with a hug and a kiss to the top of your head. Your relationship was platonic, but you could see how to the outside person it may seem like more. 

You didn’t notice Theo come up to the two of you, “Taking my sloppy seconds, Lorenzo?”

You stiffened at his words, but Enzo was quick to defend you, “Seems like you’re the one who got sloppy Theodore.” 

You chanced a look at Theo, his jaw was clenched. Enzo didn’t stop, “Shame you were such an ignorant bastard. You never deserved her in the first place.”

Enzo put a protective arm around you, pulling you into his side. Theo opened his mouth to reply, but Enzo pulled you away, headed toward your next class together.  

Theo was left standing there, steaming. Karma was a bitch.

#theo nott x reader #theo nott x you #theo nott angst #theo nott fic

[codeopod]

Is This Allowed?

Post C3E89

Laudna and Imogen get another chance to talk once they are on their split-party mission, and Orym is caught in the middle. Yes this is titled from the vine, I wanted to play with Imodna from an outside perspective cause they definetely get lost in their own little world and romanticize things that are probably horrifying to onlookers, gotta love some untrustworthy narration. Enjoy!

Orym watched as the nerves settled in to each of his friends. The weight of the world would be enough to drive anyone over the edge, not to mention the weight of another smaller -but no less significant- planet.

They all carried it differently.

Fearne’s ears gave her away, twitching and following each little sound. Ashton leaned a little heavier onto his hammer when he stood for too long, and his brow was hardly ever relaxed. Chetney’s hands had developed a slight tremor, evidenced by his increased frustration while carving. FCG was hard to read, but his emotion wheel was nearly always verging on “exterminate” rather than “smiley” which was definetely something to keep an eye on. Imogen and Laudna were an odd pair, one crackling with light and the other weaving darkness, it only ever balanced out when they were touching, which they had been doing less and less of.

“So let me get this straight,” Ashton huffed, “we’re splitting up.”

“Yeah, that way we can cover more ground.” Imogen responded tersely. She had chewed off her pinkie and thumb nails and had taken off her gloves to continue, almost mindlessly as she paced the earthen chamber. They had already ruled out the assassination mission, against Orym’s hope that she at least be there for whatever happened. He, Chetney, Imogen, and Laudna were set on the infiltration mission, while the others were decided to join Ira for an explosive distraction.

“It’ll work out Ash, it has to.” He spoke up, squaring his shoulders. “You guys do what you do best, and we’ll do the same. Play to your strengths.”

Something flashed in Ashton’s gaze before he rolled his eyes with a laugh. “Right, the time-bombs vs the high-strungs.”

“I would say poor choice of words but you literally blew up.” Laudna chimed in, spindly fingers ghosting over her neck, Imogen glared at him from behind her.

“Shit, sorry Laudna.”

“It’s alright, it was funny.” She spoke over Imogens “Not funny.”

Orym sat vigil as Imogen curled in on herself, eyes glazed as she watched the violet flickering orb of her magical light dance between them. Their party had split off that morning to infiltrate and gather as much intel as they could before finally reporting back to Exandria. They were almost done, but the pressure had only increased. Especially now that they needed to spend the night in the underground network of tunnels near their target. They were meant to be back by now, and they would lose their telepathic communication soon without Letters nearby. It was all getting messy, but they had determined that it was safer to take it slow. Somewhere nearby, Fearne, FCG, and Ashton were waiting with Ira for their signal.

They are safe. Everything is stable. He reminded himself.

He had been first to offer to watch while the rest started their nights rest, but Imogen lingered as if her light was a fire that needed stoking.

You wanna talk about it? He spoke directly in to her mind to not disturb the others. It took her a minute to respond.

Bout’ how my momma might be dead right now? How if I close my eyes I might see her walk into that storm? How it’ll be the last time I ever see her. How I could’ve probably changed her mind but chose not to?

You couldn’t have changed her mind, not overnight.

Imogen looked at the ceiling, tilting her head back to suppress her tears.… I know it. That’s the worst part. She never would’ve chosen me over them. Not without a lot of talkin’ and time we don’t have.

War is full of ugliness and pain, I’m sorry you have to experience it, but you aren’t alone. You have us, we may be broken but we’re your family too, and we chose you. He gestured to the weathered grey fur of Chetney and to where Laudna lay curled up further away. Us and your spooky lady. We love you.

She smiled a little at that. Thanks Orym.

They sat in silence for a few minutes, listening to the soft snores of the old werewolf. Imogen’s eyes were noticeably drawn to the huddled form of her girlfriend just at the edge of the purple glow.

Can I ask how it’s going with you guys?

We’re alright. We talked earlier about everything and we probably still need to talk more but it’ll have to wait.

Yeah, I think a lot of us are holding out for a breather to delve into our stuff.

Some things are easier to postpone, my momma not so much, Delilah too, I just wish she wasn’t there all the gods-damned time.

Is it really constant?

Well, ‘ts what Laudna said anyway, she’s been getting stronger, she even spoke out loud to me and Fearne. Imogen grumbled. Cant stand it…knowing that ragged nasty old bitch is whispering horseshit in her ear and watching all our time together. Makes me not wanna do any…private stuff.

Orym snorted but paused and looked thoughtful for a moment. You know that’s exactly what Delilah wants, right?

Us not doing stuff?

Not just that, she needs Laudna to feel isolated…unlovable…it’s much easier to overpower someone with nothing to live for, she would definitely want to separate you two as much as possible.

Orym thanked every deity he could think of that he was friends with Imogen Temult and not at the receiving end of her power as she shot to her feet.

“That fuckin’ cunt.” She hissed out loud, turning to go to Laudna. Thanks Orym.

Orym chuckled and let his head fall back. “Yep.”

The glowing orb trailed after her, shifting its lavender spotlight onto the couple and leaving him in total darkness.

He couldn’t help but watch as they reunited; Laudna jolting upright to check on her, before furrowing her brow and pulling Imogen into her arms. Orym could only guess what Imogen could have possibly said that had Laudna wrapping around her like a spider keen on its prey. The darkness around them drew closer and the warlocks form blurred, growing in size and shuddering as her bones cracked and grew jagged bark. Her shadows licked and played around the perimeter of Imogen’s light, casting a ghostly lightshow accross the cavern wall near them.

His grip tightened on his sword hilt. He still wasn’t used to her unique display of power, and his gut often told him he was in serious danger even if it wasn’t aimed at him. He had started deferring to Imogen in those moments, to gauge the appropriate response.

The sorcerer slipped into the dark embrace without a seconds hesitation. She held on for a long moment before she drew away just enough to pull Laudna’s distorted face down to her own, hands stained black.

He nearly blushed at the raw intimacy of it all. The urge to reach under your partners skin and make a home amongst their bones was usually, he hoped, a purely poetic notion. They were in a unique position, literally, he couldn’t quite make out what was happening so he figured it wasn’t his business.

After a few minutes he glanced back to see imogen blushing and smiling like a smitten teenager, lips smeared dark, as she swayed into Laudna’s -now relatively normal- form. They were still impossibly close, but their magics had calmed, pastel purples blending into shadowy void. He heaved a sigh of relief upon hearing the lilting crone of Laudna’s laugh echo across the cavern. As they settled into their nest of blankets, Imogen’s residual dancing light faded to a dim glow before disappearing altogether, reducing Oryms perception to just his keen ears.

He really wished it hadn’t. It didn’t take long for the pair to start muttering and whispering again. He did his best not to eavesdrop, but it quickly took a tense turn, and he felt a deeply unsettling energy radiating from their direction. The normal darkness turned into something deeper, a chill skirted up his arms, and their whispers distorted to be unrecognizable and nightmarish. He wondered if Laudna had even noticed all the ways magic flowed from her, or if Imogen had grown so accustomed that she hardly took note. He was on his feet and stepping towards them when a voice broke above the din.

“No you fuckin’ aren’t!”

He nearly groaned. They were supposed to be keeping quiet and covert, not infighting. If this came to blows they would be in for a world of problems.

A light flared to life and shot towards him. He froze, preparing for his worst eventualities to unfold, until it stopped just above his head. It was one of Imogen’s, and it swayed slightly, seemingly attached to him this time.

Thanks , uh, could you guys k-

She interrupted him with a frustrated growl.

“Nope. Not messing with that.” He muttered to himself and sat back where he was before. Luckily, things slowly returned to normal, the room regaining its very faint light from the outside, and the couple quieting down for long enough that he knew they were finally asleep. He walked over and kicked Chetney lightly to switch watches with him.

Imogen wanted nothing more than to fall into a dreamless sleep, but she had a point to make first.

“Laudna?…hun? You awake?” She whispered into her lovers mind as she took a careful step towards the slight lump in their bedroll, shedding her outer layers that smelled like ozone and earth.

Laudna shot upright, concern pinching her features. “Are you alright darling?”

“Are you?”

“Can’t seem to close my eyes.”

“Well that never stopped you before.” Imogen teased.

“Imogen…?” Laudna regarded her with caution as the intensity in her eyes sharpened and locked on to her with a faint blush.

“I love you.”

“I love you t-“ The air burst from her chest as Imogen crashed into her.

“I love all o’ you.” She whispered. “Just as you are right now, okay?”

Laudna could only mumble incoherently, balking under the sudden attention as Imogen closed her eyes, happily tucked against her collarbone.

The cold seeped around them, Laudna’s aura enveloping her just before her arms followed suit. “I love you when you’re all creepy and dark.” Imogen took a deep inhale of petrichor and cedar, her hands sliding along the delicate architecture sprouting along Laudna’s spine as it shifted to accommodate her.

All Laudna could do was squeeze her eyes shut and try desperately to believe the woman in her arms.

“All your gore too.” Warm fingers traced ink across pallid skin. “You’re so beautiful Laudna, inside and out, an’ I would know cause I’ve seen it all.” She pulled her down into a slow kiss, hands smoothing her hair as twigs and leaves fell away to oil softened tresses. “I don’t love you in spite of Delilah, I love who you are in spite of her. You’re kind, and joyful, and crafty, and you love kids and you’re always eager to help cheer people up, even when everythin’ is just awful, and I’m gonna sundre that witch for ever thinking she could dim your spark.”

Laudna’s grip on her tightened with a strength that defied her willowy form. Imogen buried her head back into her now-soft skin and pressed a light kiss to her neck.

“I wanna have a farm with horses and two babies with purple eyes and black hair and a dog and some barn cats, and I want the worst thing that happens in a month to be us runnin’ outta eggs.”

Laudna gasped a breath as her ribs settled back in to place, her shock nearly choking her. “Imogen…” she cradled her face gently, dark eyes wide in awe. “I don’t know what to say.”

“Everything is okay, I promise, I just figured some shit out and I wanted to tell you.”

“I-okay.” Laudna wiped tear tracks from warm freckled cheeks as her own dripped from her jaw. “I want that life too. More than anything. It would be my deepest honor to share that with you.”

“Then it’s decided.” Imogen hiccuped and laughed softly. “Did you still wanna sleep?”

“Will you join me?”

“Can I hold you?”

“Please.” Laudna’s voice was small, but her shy smile remained as she bumped their noses and prestidigitated the tears and ichor away.

“Aw.” Imogen mumbled. “I like when it stains me.”

Laudna laughed bright and carefree, pulling Imogen in for another kiss. “You’re strange, my love.”

“Oh I like the sound of that.” Imogen purred.

My love. Mine.

Laudna giggled, delirious with affection, and pulled Imogen down into their bedroll. Imogen rolled onto her back and tugged Laudna’s head to her shoulder, hooking her own legs over Laudna’s, fingers slipping into her hair to scratch gently at her scalp. Her other hand soothed along the arm around her waist until the usual chill had melted away under her careful attention. Laudna sighed again and sunk deeper onto her.

“Alright?” Imogen whispered.

“The children… our children, if we somehow figure out how to have them, rather than adopt, they might be different than you imagined.” Laudna whispered after a moment.

“What like purple hair and black eyes instead? Maybe we’ll get lucky and get one of each.”

“Or a…teifling.” Laudna added.

Imogen held her a little tighter. “Oh! That would be interesting.”

“You’re not opposed?”

“We could always adopt. But, I would be honored to have your little teifling babies, or hells, maybe they’ll be little patè’s- I don’t care one bit darlin- they’ll be ours.”

Laudna clutched at her chest and squeezed her eyes shut. “Okay!” She managed.

“Shit, was that too much?”

“No!” Laudna hid her face in Imogen’s neck. “This all feels like a wonderful dream that will only end in horrid dissapointment.”

“Why would you say that? We’ve come this far havent we?”

“It’s not real .” She began, “I mean -I’m not real- I’m not alive, anything good that happens is simply a nice sentence in my epilogue.” She spoke in a flippant way, whether it was because she believed it, or because it was too painful to say sincerely, either way it made Imogen’s chest ache. A chill traced her spine, and up the back of her neck.

“Don’t you dare say that. I am not a dream.”

“No. You’re far better than anything I could’ve possibly imagined.”

“Don’t get sweet on me after saying this ain’t real.”

Laudna flinched, “I’m a ghost, darling.” She whispered.

“No you fuckin’ aren’t!”

Orym cleared his throat from somewhere in the shadows. Imogen threw a glowing orb his way and turned back to Laudna. “You listen to me. Your heart beats. You have dreams and hobbies and passions. You have a whole-ass girlfriend sitting in front of you, kissin’ on you and talking about making a family. You. Are. Alive.”

“That life wasn’t meant to be mine.”

“Says who? You think you’re just meant to be a hollow shell for a necromancer to puppet? That’s why you were born? You think you haven’t suffered enough to earn a little good?” Imogen huffed and set her glare in the taller woman who was currently curled in on herself. “You think Letters isn’t worthy of love? A family? A future? Just cause his life came about a little differently? Cause he’s two old to feel as young as he does? Cause sometimes he gets the urge to do bad things cause a’ how he was made?”

“Of course not!”

“Well you’re no different.”

Laudna’s eyes darted around, welling up with cloudy tears. “Well, I never thought about it like that.”

Imogen shifted to hold her face, “You deserve this hun, all the good and the weird and the beautiful, you’re just as alive as any of us and shit, you’ll probably even outlive some of us.”

“I should hope not.”

“At least Chetney.”

“…I can live with that.”

They watched eachother in the near darkness, taking a moment to breath as the tension finally faded and the roar behind Imogen’s ears dimmed.

“I’m not letting you go.” Imogen reaffirmed.

Laudna smiled sadly but kissed her forehead. “I hope not, nor I, you.”

“Good.” The last of Imogen’s anger left her in a few hot tears that pressed into cold skin as they hugged and swayed for a long moment.

“Shall we try sleeping again?” Laudna murmured.

Imogen waited until she was almost sure Laudna was asleep before whispering softly. “I’m afraid I’ll see my momma walk into the storm.”

Laudna made a pained noise and cradled her closer. “I’m so sorry dear.”

“It’s alright, really, she’s easier to let go of now that I know more.”

“It’s very much not alright. It’s entirely fucked and horrible. But I’ll be right here the entire time you’re asleep, you won’t be alone for a second, I swear it.”

“Alright.”

#imodna #critical role #imogen temult #laudna #c3e89 #critical role spoilers #critrole #orym of the air ashari #cr orym #my fics

[thats-a-lot-of-cortisol]

I've been chewing on what fears the bg3 characters would be because I do that with almost every piece of media I like now.

Gale is the Beholding (hubris, pursuit of knowledge above all else, his ex can literally see everything he does in/with the Weave). You could make an argument for Desolation b/c of the orb but I think that's secondary. Wyll is the Hunt imo, but the Desolation works for him too- I think his situation is similar to that Hunter we meet whose name I'm forgetting, whose inciting incident has to do with the Dark. I thought the same thing about Karlach but I think she's Desolation instead of Hunt, both aesthetically and because she was actively betrayed and is, you know, dying. Shadowheart is the Dark. Halsin could honestly be the Lonely: he's pretty isolated from the people around him emotionally. An island unto himself etc etc. Lae'zel is the End imo. You'd think she'd be Hunt but End fits into Vlaakith's whole deal (victim of the End, avatar of the Hunt?). Astarion could be either the Buried (since that covers abuse as well, he was literally kept underground/out of the sunlight, etc etc) or the Hunt. I'm a bit undecided there. I don't know enough about Minthara to make a call on her and I don't want to just say Web because of Lolth. Slaughter, maybe? Since that fear covers war. Jaheira and Minsc are Hunt too, I think (there's a lot of Hunt but that comes with the territory when you're adventuring).

Gortash is Web and you cannot convince me otherwise. I think Orin is Slaughter but, honestly, Durge seems more associated with the Extinction to me because of Bhaal's end goal. The Desolation and the Lonely tag-teamed Ketheric's ass but he's an avatar of the End. Dame Aylin is an avatar of the Hunt, victim of the Dark, and Isobel is an avatar of the End a la the main End avatar we see (Oliver? I really need to re-listen...)

There's obviously a lot of overlap and bleed because there always is. I've been wanting to make art based off of this but it's not happening anytime soon so I figured I'd shout about it into the void a bit lol

#as far as tavs go: #dora is probably hunt? unclear #peri's stranger #corentin specifically is slaughter even though i know i said durge was extinction #candor is web tbh but a victim of the vast #io is...none? honestly? they were just a Normal Person before pre-tadpole #luka's end obviously #undecided about solace. theyre a victim of/marked by slaughter & desolation even though theyre a tempest cleric #buried? perhaps? im chewing on beholding for them too b/c of reasons i cant quite articulate rn #anyway #my post #jay rambles #bg3 #bg3 companions #bg3 characters #the magnus archives #tma #i dont think orins stranger despite being a changeling because that just enhances her killing #like. nicola's pretty damn murderous too but that's just bc she is #while orin uses her shapeshifting as a tool to kill *better* #idk if that makes sense #dribbles is stranger though (the real one AND the doppleganger. dont trust clowns kids)

[jeanniebug623]

🕸️🕷️ Weaving the Web 🕷️🕸️

Chapter 15: Truth Be Told

“Nice try, kid.” Quaritch said with a huff of fatigue and a bit of frustration as he took a seat next to where the kid was crouched and watched Wainfleet take his chances with the ikran. 

Spider ground his teeth slightly and glanced down then away. Any direction to not meet the colonel’s gaze. When he ‘forgot to mention’ some parts of the iknimaya process and bonding with an ikran, the kid didn’t expect Quaritch’s challenger to fling both of them right off a ledge. Spider didn’t just feel bad because, without the colonel’s protection, he would likely end up back in a prison cell. That would be the best-case scenario. A straight jacket and padded room in the worst. 

“Must’ve been one of my other sides that forgot...” Spider said to lighten the mood. He didn’t know what the recom considered discipline for almost getting him killed but the teen REALLY didn’t want to find out either. 

“Yea right.” Quaritch said with a scoff and sarcastic smirk. He was legitimately angry with Spider for not mentioning that the Na’vi would handicap the flying beasts first before attempting to make the bond. 

“For what it’s worth...” Spider said, finally having the guts to look at Quaritch’s disappointed gaze, “...you did something Jake didn’t.” 

Ok, so it was a poor attempt at making up for Quaritch possibly falling to his death but the slight perk in the recom’s ears told Spider he’d fed his ego a little bit. Not that he wanted the recom to think he was anywhere near the level of greatness Toruk Makto was, but he had to think of saving his own skin while he was still property of the RDA. 

“You didn’t use a yìmkxa.” Spider said matter-of-factly then continued when the word meant nothing, “A banshee catcher to...you know...tie the mouth shut. There really aren’t many who don’t use them...if they don’t, it’s just to show off.” 

Quaritch noticed how the teen’s voice got quieter and more awkward as it was clear Spider was trying to butter him up. The colonel had made it quite clear the consequences of causing any trouble the first time they left Bridgehead. But a lot happened since then. He was only dealing with one snarky teenager then...not said teen, a young child, and a psychopath. 

The colonel’s frustration tempered as he rested and looked back to the cheering of Wainfleet dominating the stone arena. He chuckled a bit and said, “Ya don’t say. There’re things even the great Toruk Makto can't do, eh?” 

Spider shrugged and let out an internal sigh of relief. He avoided an ass whippin’, right? Or maybe that threat was null and void now that he was so fucked up in the head? Some of the recoms acted like they were walking on eggshells around him; some acted like nothing had changed. He wasn’t sure what he would do outside of the situation. He barely knew how to handle it as it was happening to him... 

“I am...sorry.” Spider said, glancing at Quaritch then back forward when the colonel gave him a side glance. 

Quaritch stared at the boy in his side eye glance before leaning forward and saw the boy’s jaw was set tight and his brows were furrowed up. If he had pointy ears too, the recom was sure they’d be pinned back and showing genuine regret. When he smirked again, it wasn’t forced or sarcastic and he reached out to ruffle the boy’s hair. He pretended not to notice Spider flinch then try to hide it. No need to embarrass the poor kid any more than he had been... 

“Point for you, tiger, I’d be a fool to not expect you to try and knock us all off at least once...” Quaritch said. 

Spider smiled slightly and tried to hide that as well, trying not to lean into the giant hand ruffling his locs. Part of him tried to pretend it was Jake doing it. Like in some fantasy, he had been saved and everyone was happy he was back. And Jake was promising that he would never let anything happen to him again. Treat him like his own son for once... 

And yet...it felt like Spider had that with...his dead father’s recom? Maybe that was just his brain damage making him feel that way... 

But after everything Quaritch had done the last few weeks? Taking ‘legal custody’ of Spider so he wouldn’t be prisoner, being present at every major medical test, letting him stay in an apartment reserved for military leaders instead of some grunt barracks? Well...Spider also had to remind himself that Quaritch was the reason he was kidnapped and ended up in that stupid death machine in the first place. Still...if Spider was ‘nothin’ to him’ then why was Quaritch doing so much? 

“I reckon not everyone walks away from this, do they?” Quaritch asked, interrupting Spider’s thoughts as another of the squad started scrapping with an ikran. 

“Nope.” Spider said, watching Lopez get flipped right off the ikran’s back as soon as he managed to mount it. 

“And kids do this?” the colonel followed up with. 

“Like I said, younger than me. Just part of being seen as an adult in the clan. Becoming one of the People. Some of them never make it...” Spider said, his mood dropping with his tone. Despite all he had accomplished, as far as young hunters his age go, he would never follow in his friends’ footsteps. Though Quaritch took it in more the literal sense, which was also true... 

“So, parents send their kids up here to die?” Quaritch said, his ears pinning back. Something twisted in his gut that made him feel uncomfortable about a teen younger than the boy next to him taking on such a dangerous challenge. Then the twisting tightened when he thought about the danger he’d put Spider and the Sully kids upon finding them in the woods. 

No, that was unexpected and could have proved useful to finally getting Sully in the RDA’s crosshairs. 

COULD HAVE. 

“Not to die.” Spider corrected quickly, “To prove themselves.” 

“Ya ever seen a kid fail this test?” Quaritch asked with a raised eyebrow. 

“Yes, but he didn’t die. He came back when he was ready and did it again.” Spider said, shifting his feet closer together in his crouched position and crossing his arms on his knees. The position was guarded and Quaritch could tell the boy didn’t want to talk. 

“One of Sully’s kids...?” the recom asked quietly. 

“Yea...” Spider said plainly and buried his chin in his arms as he watched the squad continue to pair up with the ikrans. Something he would never be able to do. Spider would grow up, sure. Something about being considered an adult at 18? What the hell did a number have to do with proving oneself an adult? And what did that matter to his people? To the Omatikaya? Age had nothing to do with being one of the people...it was what they did in those years. And there was a lot that Spider could not do... 

The teen didn’t want to admit he was impressed with the recoms when they were all off the mountains and sitting around a campfire with their new partners snug on the cliffs around them for the night. Spider stayed quiet and just smiled to himself as he listened to the squad give each other a hard time over what they could have done better against the ikrans. 

“That’s bull and you know it!” Lopez shot back as he was on the receiving end of most of the hazing. 

“Seriously, brother, if you hadn’t tried to jump it so quick, you wouldn’t have landed on your ass.” Wainfleet jeered with a laugh. 

Spider watched the way the recoms spoke to each other. They goaded each other in a way no different than himself and Lo’ak. It sounded tough but was all in good fun. The comradery. The warrior’s brotherhood. They were practically a family. More of a family than he ever had. He tried to push that thought away. He did have people in his life like this...he really did. They’d just...left him behind. Well, Jake probably made that call so was he really surprised by it? He wasn’t Jake’s kid...and he wasn’t worth the risk... 

“Spider?” Quaritch said for the third time, concerned the boy was disassociating and one of the alters had stepped in without any of them noticing. He placed a gentle hand on Spider’s shoulder and looked into his eyes while asking, “You good, boy?” 

“Yea, why?” Spider asked. Traces of panic infiltrated his mind. Did he lose time? Did someone else take over? 

“Yea.” Quaritch said quickly to put concern out of the boy’s mind, “I asked you three times if you were still hungry, but you didn’t answer.” 

“Oh...sorry...” Spider said, sighing quietly in relief as he looked back at the fire. 

“Nothin’ to be sorry for, kid.” 

“I think I’m just tired...”  

“You should be after tryin’ to leave us behind in the mountains.” Quaritch said as he patted the boy’s head and nodded off to where their sleep mats were laid out away from the fire, “Off to bed now, son. Get.” 

Spider stared at Quaritch, long enough that the colonel looked confused. ‘Son’ was not a word Spider was used to hearing unless it was in the context of ‘son of the demon’. He wasn’t really that tired. His brain was too busy processing his shifting perception of Quaritch and the recoms. How could being stuck with people who were supposed to be ‘the enemy’ feel like such a safe place to be...? 

Eventually, he nodded and wandered over to lay down away from where the fire polluted his night vision. Laying on his back, Spider stared up at the starry sky and shifting colors from the aurora. 

“Everything ok, boss?” Wainfleet asked, interrupting the colonel’s thoughts and staring at the boy. 

“Yea, Lyle...” Quaritch said, running his hand over his chin, “Just tryin’ to figure out what’s on the kid’s mind. Can’t read him today.” 

“You could just ask him.” Wainfleet suggested. 

“I asked him if he was good. Said he was.” 

“He might think he’s good. Or it might be easier to just say he’s good. Don’t you remember being a teenager? Last thing you wanted when a parent asked what was wrong was to actually tell them the truth.” 

“Parent?” 

Quaritch and Wainfleet looked at each other in silence. 

“Well, you know...ANY adult asking a teenager what’s wrong...they’re gonna avoid talking about it.” Wainfleet said. He didn’t realize what he’d said until his friend called him on it. Regardless of the shock of the term used, the corporal clapped his hand on the colonel's shoulder as he stood. “I’ll take your watch, boss. Take the night off.” 

Quaritch watched Wainfleet take up arms and start the new two hour perimeter watch. He cleared his throat and looked back to Spider. He could see he wasn’t asleep. In fact, the kid was pointing up at the stars and slowly moving his hand around. He cleared his throat again to distract himself from procrastinating then went over to the boy. 

“Not as tired as you thought, eh?” Quaritch said as his shadow blocked the firelight. 

“Too bright with the fire...” Spider lied. 

“Ah, right...hate that...” the colonel sat down, continuing to block the firelight. “Better?” 

“Yea...thanks...” Spider said, resting his hand on his stomach. 

“What’s got your head in the clouds, tiger?” Quaritch asked, leaning his head back to look up at the stars as well. 

“Just looking at the pictures in the stars.” Spider said with a shrug. 

“The Na’vi got constellations too?”  

“Yea...” 

“Like what?” 

Spider rolled his head to look at Quaritch as he continued to see what he could figure out on his own. He couldn’t tell if the recom really cared about the stars, but he did care enough to come over and check on Spider. So, he might as well humor the conversation... 

“There’s Tuvom Taronyu and Taronyutsyìp right there...” Spider pointed to two clusters next to each other. “The Greatest Hunter and the Little Hunter.” 

Quaritch looked at where Spider was pointing but it just looked like shiny dots in the sky to him. His ears twitched back, and he shuffled down the mat so he could lay back to see it from the same perspective as Spider. It didn’t help much and he asked, “Not seein’ a damn thing, Spider, what am I lookin’ at here?” 

“There.” Spider pointed up and the colonel tilted his head to get a better look, leaning his cheek against the top of Spider’s head. “You see the spear in the Greatest Hunter’s hands? And the bow in the Little Hunter’s?” 

“Ehh...” was all Quaritch could say as he tried to see what the boy was seeing. He held up his arm between them. Spider leaned his head further into the gap between the recom’s head and shoulder to look up the direction of his arm. 

“More like...there.” Spider said as he reached over to grab ahold of Quaritch’s arm and moved it into a better position. As he re-explained, he continued to move the recom’s hand accordingly like he was tracing the stars like a connect the dots page out of a child’s coloring book. “There’s the big hunter. And the spear...is over their head. See?” 

“Ah, yea.” Quaritch said, genuinely seeing the full picture now. The teen continued to tell him about the constellation and then some. He pointed out animals and plants and Na’vi folklore. The fire had been put out and the squad went to sleep. The sounds of the forest echoed, but all Quaritch could hear at that moment was the boy next to him as spoke with such fervor and passion that they could forget about what brought them to this point in time. And what unpredictable future lay ahead for the boy. 

“There.” Spider said suddenly, pointing to a constellation that had peeked out from behind the floating mountains as the stars moved across the sky over the time they’d been talking. “That one’s mine.” 

“Yours? Don’t tell me they do that horoscope bullshit here on Pandora too.” Quaritch grumbled as he tried to figure out what Spider was pointing at. Then a thought crossed his mind...what was Spider’s zodiac sign? He may not have cared for it, but Paz did. 

“I don’t know what that is.” Spider said before quickly moving on and drawing over the stars with his pointed finger so Quaritch could get an idea of what the image was, “A lot of times, Na’vi kids will claim a star or a constellation as kind of a guardian. Something to watch over them when they can’t watch over themselves. You know, like when you’re asleep? That one’s mine.” 

“Kinda looks like a...” Quaritch tilted his head to the side and squinted. He really didn’t want to insult the kid by his interpretation. Considering how many countless stars were in the sky, this specific constellation seemed sparse. It had the least amount of stars after the boy traced over it again. He cleared his throat quietly when he felt the kid’s head bump against his shoulder to prompt him to continue speaking and said, “Like a little arrowhead...surrounded by little spindly legs. But it looks all by its lonesome.” 

Spider snorted at the description and tilted his head against Quaritch’s arm again, “I mean you’re not wrong...” 

“What’s your little guardian called?” Quaritch asked, smiling that he figured it out without embarrassing himself too badly. 

“Le’awtu Swirä.” Spider answered quietly. 

“And that means, smart guy?” 

“Lonely Creature.” 

Silence fell between the two. Quaritch found himself missing the boy’s endless astronomy lecture immediately. To the colonel’s relief, Spider spoke up to further explain. 

“It’s not what you think...” Spider said vaguely. He took in a breath then let it out before continuing, “The Lonely Creature is one of the Na’vi’s greatest stories. It’s about an unknown creature that lives everywhere on Pandora. In the forest, the mountains, the seas, the deserts...everywhere. No one knows what it looks like, but they know it’s there.” 

“A whole pack of unknown critters?” Quaritch asked. 

“No, just one. But it can be anywhere it wants to be. Not knowing what the Lonely Creature is makes it accepted wherever it goes. The Na’vi respect the Lonely Creature because they don’t know what it is. They don't hate what they don’t understand. They need a reason to hate something...so they don’t hate what they don’t know.” Spider said, his eyes staring unblinking at his guardian in the stars. 

Silence fell between the two as stones sunk into Quaritch’s stomach. There were a lot of reasons for the humans and the Na’vi to hate each other. That was for damn sure. But he didn’t care about that. Spider was so expendable that there were no rescue attempts. If that didn’t say ‘hate’ in some form of the word, Quaritch didn’t know what did. But this poor kid didn’t deserve that... 

“Means more now than ever...most kids stop believing in them way younger than me...” Spider admitted sheepishly. 

“Yea? Why’s that?” Quaritch asked, quietly. 

“They don’t need stars to watch over them because they can connect to who’s here...they’re protected by who’s here...” Spider answered. A third silence. The colonel didn’t know if the kid was talking about parents or the clan or their great goddess Eywa. It seemed this Lonely Creature chose to stay lonely just to feel wanted, respected, and a part of something. Even if it that acceptance was based on how far it could stay away... 

“Am I ever going to be ok...?” Spider asked with a quiet voice, barely able to escape his tight throat. He didn’t feel as lonely as he used to. It was hard to when all he could think about was the extra personalities that he could not control. But they were there in his mind.  

“You’re already ok.” Quaritch said, struggling almost as badly as Spider was to speak. The boy didn’t answer but he heard him shifting until he was lying with his back to the recom. Quaritch contemplated his next decision, both for his sake and the boy’s, before sweeping his arm out and around the boy to pull him close. 

Spider may have been a little panicked mentally but allowed Quaritch to scoop him up in his arm to be pulled back against the recom’s side. The recom's arm was so long it could lay around his head and bend up at the elbow, so a large hand rested on the boy’s upper arm. Quaritch gave it a light squeeze and Spider found himself curling his head comfortably into the arm of the closest person he ever had to a father... 

Got to give a shout out to @naavispider for inspiration for their stargazing scene from chapter 12 of If You Ain't Playing Me. ✨

#atwow #atwow fanfiction #atwow spider #recom quaritch #spider quaritch #weaving the web #ao3 writer

[possessionisamyth]

Thought of Sherry and made myself sad because she was 10 (retconned from being 12) during the whole Raccoon City incident and didn't have her pseudo parents (Claire and Leon) for a week before she's being shifted into Simmons' hands.

I was thinking of what kind of lie and the strings of control Simmons would have to cast in order to make Sherry trust him. I can believe she was tutored the year the incident took place partially because they wanted to check her danger levels as a bioweapon and partially because she was a traumatized child so her mental state would need to be balanced before being thrown back into school. The best place for her would be private school the whole time. There's a level of control money brings, and Simmons would be able to pay off or make disappear anyone who might see something strange about her. He'd funnel her to private doctors and nurses for all her appointments where she might be out of school for a week here and there, but her absence and lack of work wouldn't be punished either because, again, money talks.

I can think of her as suspicious and untrustworthy of Simmons at the beginning because Leon promised to protect her, and she's hearing nothing from him. I'd think Simmons would extend an olive branch to keep that control and lie appropriately. If he says Leon abandoned her, it would incite rebellion, and he needed Sherry to trust him. He'd probably tell her Leon was paying for everything with his job so she could live a normal life. Her acceptance of this would come in tiny waves. She did hear other student's parents talk about how expensive tuition and supplies and uniforms are. She is getting the nicest toys whether they're limited edition or sold out before they appear in her room all wrapped up with a bow. She can decorate her room however she wants and anything she needs is provided quickly.

She can't see Simmons weaving the web where sometimes her gifts would read "From: Leon". It's not his handwriting, but Sherry wouldn't know. She doesn't get that an extended school vacation after breaking an arm which healed in a week instead of 6-8 weeks was a means of keeping up the air of normalcy to her peers. She's told over and over Leon's working hard to make sure she has the best of everything, and does she really want to stop him? Does she know what'll happen if she does? Suddenly it's like she's with her parents again. That if she makes too much of a fuss she'll cause problems for them. She'll cause problems for Leon. So she oh so gradually stops asking where he is and what he's doing and when she can see him. Besides, the excuses for why she can't know that information were getting old and tired anyway. "He just left the country", or "He's getting special training," or "He's moving again". It was like they weren't even trying to not lie to her.

Until Claire comes to visit. What better way for Simmons to cement the trust he needs then to let Sherry see the other important person in her life as much as she can? Which does work. When Claire visits on her school breaks and holidays, the lies do feel a lot more like the truth. Sherry doesn't expect Claire and Leon to be attached at the hip, but if Claire can visit while being busy with college, maybe Leon was as busy as Simmons said. It helps that Claire admits she also struggles getting in contact with Leon. So maybe Leon was almost always out of the country and getting training and working all hours since everything Sherry needed was so expensive. Maybe he was working so hard to make sure Sherry had the best life she could. Maybe she should stop trying to see deception that wasn't there and work hard herself to make sure Leon's efforts went to something good. So she stops asking for Leon except maybe around the milestone events like the 13th birthday and 16th birthday and 18th birthday, and highschool graduation, and college graduation, and by then? By then, all the little red flags of Simmons control hadn't registered until RE6 where the mask comes off.

She sees Leon for the first time in 15 years, and it's him telling her everything was a lie. Simmons was a traitor and never had her best interest in mind. Never had their best interest in mind, and too many things are happening for her to process the information. She just has to swallow it all.

What's worse is she probably would try her best not to beat herself up about it, but I don't know how well she'd succeed. The looping mantra of knowing at 10 years old she was right about the lies and fell for them anyway. Having the hindsight of an adult to notice every single time Simmons nudged her life this way or that way to make sure she did everything he wanted. Questioning how many of her decisions were her wanting to be better than her parents, to make Leon's effort worth it, to be as well-adjusted as she could be around Claire, how much was actually her and how much was Simmons' manipulation? How much of her choices and personhood were hers and not a result of what Simmons wanted her to be? Fingers crossed she took a long vacation after RE6, and a longer vacation to really comb through that contract Simmons definitely gave her for her current career.

#resident evil #sherry birkin #derek simmons #claire redfield #leon kennedy #re headcanons #re analysis #gets both tags because im trying to fill in gaps #anyways wheres my claire and leon get sherry fic where all 3 discover sherrys healing abilities and they panic together #sonic voice: Im waiiiiitiiiiiing

[otrtbs]

hi!!

thank you so much for everything that you’ve contributed to this fandom, seriously, your time has been invaluable. people treat fanfic authors like a writing machine, but no, this is just your hobby!!

i was wanting to ask about your writing process:

1. when writing, do you usually write most/all of your fic before starting to post it?

2. how much do you outline before starting to write?

3. how do you keep up with what seems to be a semi regular posting schedule (as in like, staying committed to a fic and actually completing it lol)

sorry if you’ve already answered any of these before :)

hey hey heyo!!! this is so sweet!!

it honestly depends! with ahb!, i had a very good direction and plan on where i was taking the fic so i knew each chapter before i sat down to write it! but winterlude was more free-form. i was like, i want these 15 things to happen over 4 chapters lets make it work! and then with the dinner fic, that's one that i am writing out in its entirety before i post it. because there's a lot of details and web-weaving that go into it, and if i drop a thread somewhere it'll make the whole tory unravel, so it has to be complete before anyone else sees it. so it really depends on the vibe/intricacy of the fic!!

most of the time i'll try to outline a solid timeline with beginning and then major points to the end in chronological order. (so with art heist imagine like: 1. james introduction. 2. job interview/acquisition 3. assembling the heist team 4. meeting the team 5. new hampshire training 6. practice heist 7. heist 8. art swaps (berlin/amsterdam/portofino/copenhagen) 9. regulus death 10. grieving 11. healing 12. ending) <- and then i would go in and fill in things like,,, how does a jegulus relationship develop amidst all of this? and then you get sub-plot points like the museum date, the drowning degas, the auction house date, etc. until you get a pretty good fleshed-out idea! and then as i write and have even more ideas, i can plop them down somewhere on the timeline (amsterdam coffeeshop meeting/last supper group dinner/ etc) . and before writing each chapter,,, i sort of break chapters down into mini-stories with their own beginnings, middle, ends. just to make sure something is happening in each chapter, and it has structure.

this is putting so much faith in me hahah!! my posting schedule ranges from twice in one week to once in 4-6 months. and sometimes i just delete works if im not feeling them anymore ah! but!! i will say, the biggest way i stay committed to completing a story is having an ending in mind that i'm excited to execute or get to!! like something on the horizon at the end of the story normally motivates me to write enough to get to that point. but it's also just okay to stop writing a certain story if you're feeling uninspired!! sometimes, when i'm feeling burnt-out with one story and i'm not motivated to finish it, i'll just leave it alone and go work on something i'm actually interested in for a while until i feel the interest spark up again!! (hence...months between uploads sometimes) 😋

#asks #hope this makes sense!! sorry for the ramble !!

[quaranmine]

Next steps for the AU:

-I have a couple of analysis-type posts to make. I love talking about this fic lol so I have a lot to say still. Included in this will be a review of art symbolism, setting as a character, and some selected real-life cases and research I ran across. I may also talk a little about fire symbolism as well as my fun fire-related words I purposefully scattered around (if you noticed me describe feelings as a spark a lot, it was on purpose lol.) I also may talk about a couple things that didn't end up happening, or did happen but almost didn't.

-This weekend I am going to revisit the fic chapters 8-12 to see if I can add more art to them. I had initially wanted more art pieces throughout the fic but the art would sometimes delay finished chapters for weeks (i have to both draw and color it traditionally, photograph it in good light, and then digitally edit it) so I started worrying less about it. If I do I will post those pieces and retroactively add them in the chapter.

-Speaking of retroactive edits, some earlier chapters of the story on AO3 have some issues with em dashes appearing smaller than they should be. This is corrected in my original document but I never got around to correcting the published chapters (i am always mildly worried the formatting will break lol.) When I do this I will also add cocoabats' cover into the first chapter. I also plan to retroactively edit some of my Fire Finder Math in chapter 3 because I think I made Grian's tower taller than it needs to be/at the wrong elevation. This won't affect the chapter outcome at all I just Need that to be accurate for myself

-I have a great many web weaving materials that I have slowly collected over the months that I would like to mess with again. I have been saving them in a #f tag on my main blog, but I didn't make any except for one because I wanted the full context of the story to be published.

-Going to upload the Letters from the Lookout drabbles into the AO3 series. Hopefully in the future I may add more. Or, I may not. We'll see. I also have a Scar-centric story called "Alpenglow" in my outline. based on its structure it may have multiple chapters, but it will not have any sort of through-line plot. It's selected scenes from his 8 years career as a lookout. I want to write this, but I don't know if it will be or not. With the main fic done I will be releasing my brain to work on other projects/ideas that I didn't want to get distracted by earlier. That doesn't mean it won't happen, it just means that it may not happen on a fast timeline.

#and as always i will answer any any ask or question about the story haha

[darkholme]

what do u think would happen if rick ever met bucky barnes. thinking of the fact he tried to fight zemo for revenge for buck's death etc etc

anon, i'm not exaggerating when i say that this is something that i've thought about daily since i got obsessed with rick and read the issue that casually throws out that he and bucky look like twins. i have a whole comic pitch that's centered around this with a matching spotify playlist and pinterest board. i have a pretentious web weave in my drafts about their potential relationship i'll finish and post one of these days.

i honestly don't think that rick at this point in continuity would actually want to meet bucky - he probably knows that he's alive and around, but wouldn't seek bucky out, wouldn't ask about him, would probably completely avoid him if at all possible. i really dislike a lot of modern misinterpretations of rick's tenure as steve's sidekick and wearing the bucky costume (looking at specifically bendis, PAD, and nick spencer), but i do think that rick being equal parts embarrassed that he was so adamant about wearing that costume, as well as being resentful of steve and steve's rose tinted memory of bucky, are very in character.

because the (completely one-sided) issue that rick has with bucky isn't with james barnes the person; its with the idea of bucky the sidekick, the child who died tragically and heroically, that rick would never live up to.

and i am so interested by that! especially because, by contrast, i do think that bucky would want to meet rick! i think he would want to meet the people that are important to his father figure, and i think that he would realize how much he and rick surprisingly do have in common beyond looking identical.

i'm being a little vague here just because i do have a semi-serious comic pitch that is my big dream to write, so i don't want to give away all my ideas. but yes! i think very much that they should meet and talk! i'm shocked that this hasn't been done in mainline continuity yet!

#asks #rick jones #bucky barnes #spoiler: it would involve a lot of screaming and crying on ricks end tbh

[seyaryminamoto]

The Shadows in her Reflection: Sokkla Saturdays 2023

Chapter 2: Spring

Rated M

On FF.net//On AO3

She was restrained, trapped in a dark web of tendrils that weaved through her arms, and legs, and…

She cried. Tears spilled down her cheeks.

Smoke and darkness swallowed her, and the pale glow she released dimmed, and dimmed, and…

Yue's desperate eyes locked onto hers, wordlessly pleading to be saved.

Azula gasped and sat up, chest heaving: again, one of those nightmares. Again, Yue haunted her in dreams in a way she couldn't understand.

"You okay?"

Over the past months, no one had been around to ask that question to her. Truth be told, no one had dared ask it for much longer than that. Her allies, the false Kemurikage, had never bothered asking that question… perhaps because none of them were okay. It might have been redundant to ask at all.

But it wasn't something redundant for him, her sudden, new companion who piloted the hot-air balloon in her stead. He was helpful, at least, in providing her time to rest better than she had in a long time… but she wasn't sure she felt all that comfortable near him, anyways.

"I'm fine. Just… a dream," Azula said, shaking her head. Sokka nodded.

"Well, now that you're up, we can have breakfast," he said. Azula grimaced.

"I'm not going to cook for you," she said. "And you'd better be grateful that I won't. I'd likely make us both sick."

"In all these years, you haven't learned how to cook?" Sokka asked, with a slight smirk. Azula scoffed.

"I may have lost my titles and my position in society, but deep inside, I will always be a Princess," Azula said, stubbornly.

"Which means you've been stuck eating whatever scraps you could find, steal, maybe buy on occasion if you had any money on you?" Sokka concluded. Azula shrugged.

"You know, people happen to drop money in the weirdest of places. Did you know commoners enjoy tossing coins into fountains?"

"You… you fished out coins from fountains and used them for…?" Sokka blinked blankly. Azula smirked.

"It was quite helpful. I for one welcome their generosity. It was like collecting a tax, only, everyone paid it willingly. Strange, wouldn't you say?"

"People usually do that because they're making wishes and they think they'll come true," Sokka said. Azula snorted and laughed.

"Fools that they are. Did they expect spirits to fulfill wishes by paying them actual money? Spirits are a lot more irksome than that. They don't fulfill wishes, they demand that you fulfill theirs, going by my experience... though it's worth noting, too, that Yue actually assisted me at collecting the coins ever since she took to invading my head."

"She assisted you?" Sokka asked, perplex.

"Indeed. She was reflected off every one of those coins, so she took to calling me, guiding me to the next one, and the next… and the next thing I knew, I was eating the best bowl of spicy ramen I'd had in years," Azula snickered. "I suppose that was a rare case where she was surprisingly helpful… even if she kept showing up in the bowl's broth later, too."

"It has to be so surreal… seeing someone that way," Sokka said, frowning. Azula shrugged.

"It's unnerving and stressful. But it makes no matter, my entire life has been exactly that for the past years and I'm still alive and kicking," she said, with a dry grin. "At any rate, enough about my strange experiences. What's this breakfast you're setting up, exactly?"

Azula was surprised to find Sokka had actually packed some food from the Northern Water Tribe upon his venture into the Palace to gather his things. She hummed appreciatively as he offered her what he described as mooncakes, and he handed her a cup of water to down the food, too…

Azula glanced into it with a pang of nervousness: never before had the dreams meant anything deeper. Every time she glanced into her reflection, Yue was there. She always felt the uncertainty of whether she would be or not when she had those unsettling dreams, where Yue appeared to be suffering terrible hardships…

But just as ever, Yue smiled and waved at her when Azula glanced into the water's reflection.

"I didn't poison it, you don't have to look at it like… oh. Oh, wait. Yue?"

Azula raised an eyebrow skeptically at Sokka, as though it was a given that she'd see the Northern Water Tribe Princess in the liquid. It had become such a natural matter to her that she could barely fathom Sokka forgetting about it. He seemed nervous now, swallowing hard and running a hand over his hair.

"You don't need to be so self-aware. She can't see you from that angle," Azula said, with a dry grin. Sokka scoffed.

"You try feeling less self-aware when the person you loved and lost is… potentially looking at you?" he said. "Also, when they're attached to someone who had nothing to do with them, instead of you…"

"I'd hand her over to you in a heartbeat if I knew how," Azula said. Sokka grimaced.

"I know, I know. But spirit mumbo-jumbo makes no sense," he sighed. Azula nodded.

"Truer words," she said, before downing half her drink.

"Oh, uh… good morning, Azula."

"Oops. Nearly swallowed you there, now, did I?" Azula said, pulling the drink back with a mocking grin. "Did you sleep well too? Any happier now that you're traveling with someone you actually like, for whatever reason you do?"

"Heeeey…"

"Well, I was doing that already. It's… well, interesting traveling with you, Azula."

"Interesting. That's a fine choice of words, Princess Yue," Azula sneered. "Admit it, my lifestyle is utterly nerve-wracking for you. I'm sure you're on the edge of your seat constantly, wondering if I'm going to get myself killed one way or another, sooner than later…"

"If she does worry about that, she shouldn't be that scared. Nobody's ever going to catch you, now, are they?" Sokka cut in. Azula smirked at him.

"And if they do, I'll make them regret it," she said. "You're only allowed to exist around us because… well, I'm sure Yue would throw a tantrum perpetually if I dared hurt you. It would be terribly irritating not being able to drink anything or look at myself in any manner of reflective surface without hearing her whine about whatever I did to you… sometimes I'm not even looking and she still so very kindly starts rambling to me anyhow."

"You know, as much as I'd love talking to her… I can't deny it would be a little distressing to see someone everywhere with water or reflective surfaces," Sokka said, with an awkward grin. "Can't imagine how it must be to take a leak and, uh… uh. Ew."

"You really have a worrisome imagination," Azula blinked blankly. "I, uh… shall endeavor to never look at any reflective surfaces whenever I need a bathroom."

"… Well, I don't talk whenever you're in the bathroom because I know you…"

Azula most certainly didn't need to hear whatever Yue would say next: she swallowed her drink fully, and with that, Yue's voice was extinguished. Despite himself, Sokka snorted and raised an eyebrow in her direction.

"Was she revealing something, uh…?"

"Something I most likely didn't want to hear? Yes," Azula said, with a dry grin. Sokka chortled. "She is shockingly naïve in some ways. I suspect she merely wants to be friendly and doesn't understand that doesn't work with someone like me."

"Or maybe that's just the way she is," Sokka said. Azula crooked an eyebrow. "What?"

"You actually think she's not covering up that she hates being stuck with me?" she asked. Sokka frowned. "Don't look at me like that. You're no happier about it than she must be…"

"Wait," Sokka said, raising an eyebrow. "You think Yue… doesn't want to be with you?"

"Why would she be, if she could be with someone she actually cherishes? Like you?" Azula said, simply. Sokka scratched the back of his neck. "I'm under no delusions that anyone would choose to be stuck with me. As far as I know, Zirin couldn't wait to see the back of me by the time she did her mutiny."

"I'm not going to pretend you're talking out of your ass because I know people have been hounding you and chasing you and you haven't had the nicest life…" Sokka said, crooking an eyebrow. "But do you really think nobody would ever willingly choose to be near you?"

"You're not exactly an example to the opposite, are you?" Azula asked, skeptical. "You're here because of her. If Yue weren't around, you'd only want to be near me to shackle me yourself. Much like Zuko would love to."

"I…" Sokka said, frowning.

She wasn't entirely wrong: he had never given a second thought to Azula on a level that didn't relate to how dangerous she was. His first impression of her, back in Omashu, was nothing but confusion over facing a group of girls around their age, in charge of such a delicate operation like trading a child for a king. Then, she had broken out the blue firebending and from that point onwards, she was someone to fear, avoid, or fight should there be no other option. She always seemed wary of him in battlefields, no doubt aware of how dangerous his weapons could be… but ever since the war ended, she had fallen from grace and lost her way. No one had ever regarded her or treated her as anything but a problem to be dealt with since then… and it was clear now that such behavior had taken a real toll on the firebending prodigy.

"Lie to me about this and I will throw you overboard," Azula said, curtly. Sokka sighed, raising his hands.

"I won't lie. I wasn't exactly going to the North Pole with the idea of sitting down for tea and cookies with you," Sokka said. Azula smiled dryly.

"That's progress. A little honesty goes a long way," she said. Sokka snorted.

"Zuko says you always lie, though. Honesty is what you want now?"

"Zuko liked to say that whenever I was telling him truths he didn't want to hear, is more like it," Azula said, giving Sokka pause. "Such as when I told him our father was going to kill him under our grandfather's orders. Funnily enough, now he knows for certain that it was true and he still goes around telling his friends that I always lie. How about that?"

"Well… Zuko's not the sharpest tool in the shed, I'll admit that much," Sokka said. Azula smirked.

"If you're not just saying that to amuse me…"

"I'm not! I've always bickered with him over weird choices he makes, believe it or not," Sokka said. "It's honestly not that hard to see that he could've approached you the wrong way. But you also have to admit, you don't exactly make it easy for people to see who you really are, do you?"

"Why am I expected to do that?" Azula asked, amused. "You're always acting like a fool to mislead other fools into underestimating you. How is it fine when you do that, but when I…?"

"When you act like you would kill people willy-nilly, like you don't care about anything but a throne, when you manipulate your brother into making unhinged decisions with no regard for how that might just bite you in the ass later?" Sokka asked. Azula frowned. "I… I don't want him to reach a point where he stupidly chooses to do something he regrets to you, Azula."

"Why?" Azula asked. "What is it to you if he, I don't know, chooses to execute me alongside my group? Would make your life easier… ah, but I wouldn't be able to communicate with Yue for you. That's right."

"Not like you're doing much of that so far," Sokka said, raising an eyebrow. "You never tell me what she's saying, and when you do, it sounds like you're…"

"Lying? Only once in a while," Azula smirked. Sokka scowled.

"She didn't think I'm not as handsome anymore. You can't convince me of that," he pouted. Azula snickered deviously. "See? You were pulling my hair! Anyone can tell I've actually gotten better with age, Azula! I'm buffer, I've got some facial hair…!"

"What makes you think women like facial hair? Or teenage girls, in her case?" Azula asked. Sokka winced. "Also, heavily muscular men. If Princess Yue liked you lanky and beardless, why would you be any more appealing to her now?"

"You… stop making me second-guess myself!" Sokka squeaked. Azula couldn't hold back another cackle of devious laughter. "Seriously, you…"

She laughed in a rather wicked way… but somehow, it brought a smile to his face too. It was contagious, slightly amusing. She had a mean sense of humor… but even if she was mocking him, Sokka couldn't help but find it slightly funny, too.

"Anyway," he said, trying to stifle his smile. "If you give me reasons beyond Yue to think you're not a hazard to the world…"

"I am one, though. Proudly."

"Then… give me reasons to want to keep you safe so you can continue tormenting your brother?" Sokka asked, with a dry grin. Azula raised an eyebrow.

"Why… why would you want me to do that, exactly?" she asked.

"Because I want to prove a point here," Sokka said. Azula scoffed.

"Well, then… I ought to continue tormenting him because it's funny. That's the main reason for it," she said. "Someone with the temper and lack of restraint of my brother simply cannot have an easygoing, calm and quiet life. It would be terribly unfulfilling. He would always know he's lacking something… and that something is being teased mercilessly by his sibling. Simple as that."

"Okay… let me translate that," Sokka said, blinking blankly before rubbing his forehead with his fingertips. Azula eyed him skeptically as he seemed to work harder and harder on processing her words… until he finally delivered his grand epiphany: "Zuko is too much of a stubborn idiot and he's set in his ways, stuck on reading and interpreting you in one set way, and the only way you can be part of his life is to continue acting exactly as he expects you to. Thus, you continue to torment him as you have because you can take advantage of such situations to give him trouble that deters other people from stirring trouble too… you're protecting him in a rather twisted way. With you as the bad guy, the rebel against his righteousness, the Fire Nation indeed grows stronger because they're banding against you, rallied by Zuko. On a more basic level… you're just the annoying little sister because you don't know what else to be. But ultimately… you care about him, don't you?"

"How dare you…?!" Azula gasped, her face a mask of utter affront and outrage…

Her cheeks flushed slightly. Sokka smirked.

"You…! Shut up!" Azula snapped, the weakest possible comeback she could have offered him. Sokka's smile couldn't have been wider. "That's not what…! Ugh, you're impossible! Your mad interpretations about me are entirely out of place! I have a purpose! I have a right to do everything I have! It has nothing to do with Zuko being my brother or…! Just shut up!"

Sokka shrugged, saying nothing else indeed. Azula glared at him until she couldn't look at him anymore…

Five minutes later, she exploded, and Sokka had to hide his amusement behind a hand.

"Whatever mad fantasies older brothers may have, the truth is you're all pains that we have to bear with! You're our burdens, not the other way around!" she lashed out. Sokka shrugged.

"Maybe so."

"Don't just condescendingly say I'm right! Prove me wrong, damn you!"

"Right, right. That's what you do with Zuko, right? Say things to piss him off and…"

"Quit analyzing me! What do you think you are, damn you?!" Azula scoffed.

"Sometimes I'm, uh, Wang Fire, actually. I helped Aang talk through his problems once!" Sokka declared, proudly, though the grin waned before long. "Or, uh, I thought I had. Maybe I'm doing a better job with you, though!"

"A better job at pissing me off. Unreal. You have no business peering into my business," Azula snapped. "Whatever I do, however I handle Zuko, is not your problem. Or anyone else's."

"Thing is… he has the power to fuck up your life if he ever catches up to you. And he got kind of close this time," Sokka said.

"And I ask again: why would that be of any concern to you? Just because of Yue?" Azula asked, arms folded over her chest.

"Well…" Sokka frowned. "Maybe it really isn't just about her after all."

"Right. It's because you're worried about Zuzu…"

"Azula… this is the first time I've actually talked to you."

Azula frowned, glancing at him in confusion. There was no sign of mirth in his face anymore.

"You mean… the first time you've talked to me with no overt aggressiveness on either side?" Azula asked. "We've exchanged plenty of barbs and jabs at each other. I mocked you over your girlfriend in the underground tunnels, remember? What a fun day that was…"

"It sure was," Sokka said, eyebrow twitching… but he was quick to recognize her intent just as she smirked slightly. "You're trying to take back control. Trying to trigger an emotional reaction out of me. If I recognize it, then…"

"Could you stop?! What's the matter with you?" Azula lashed out. Sokka laughed, hands behind his head.

"This… this is actually way more fun than it has any right to be," he said. Azula snarled. "You're a challenge."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Azula said.

"I mean… it's like we're dueling when we talk. You know?" Sokka smiled eagerly. "Like everything you do or say could be a fake-out, and then you'll attack me through another front once I leave an opening for you to exploit. If I recognize the bluff, you back down and look for another angle. It's… interesting."

"Interesting?" Azula said: her heart felt slightly strange upon hearing that word again, this time from Sokka rather than Yue.

"You have to take some pity on me here, can you?" Sokka sighed, looking at her helplessly. "Do you think I ever have complex conversations with Zuko? Conversations with multiple layers that actually challenge me on an intellectual level?"

"Well… no," Azula admitted, with a cruel smirk. Sokka shrugged.

"The best I can get is Toph, basically, because she's always ready to give as good as she gets and she's got a damn good mind for insults. So at least that's kind of funny. But any bigger ideas, anything less material and corporeal and I lose her just as well, she tells me to shove it, and so on. My sister? Well, there's not much point in trying to get any productive results there because no matter if I'm right, in the end I'm somehow wrong, she wins and I lose. Simple as that."

"And your girlfriend?" Azula asked. Sokka froze. "What, no fun banter there for you either?"

"Heh. Not really," Sokka said. Azula frowned.

"That's an opening, you know? And you're doing nothing to cover it up. I'm being nice right now and giving you a chance to cover it up indeed… do it or I'm going for the kill, Sokka," she said, with a dry grin now. Sokka sighed.

"She gets mad at me, is all," he said. Azula's smile waned. "If I push any banter further, she doesn't know how to respond and… just gets mad at me. Conversation sputters and dies just like that."

"Huh," Azula raised an eyebrow. "Sounds… boring."

That Sokka smiled at her remark should have been an alarming sign, but Azula didn't read it as such right away. He shook his head though, looking at her eagerly.

"You, though… I have the feeling you could go for hours. And somehow, that sounds like fun to me," he said.

"You won't say the same things if I indeed go out of my way to bicker you for hours and you end up losing," Azula said.

"Might be worth it even if I do," Sokka smiled, leaning back on his seat and sighing.

"I suppose you didn't bring up the Avatar because arguing with him is akin to kicking a puppy…" Azula said. Sokka chortled and shrugged.

"That's probably a good way to put it. Though, make no mistake, he has a temper of his own. But he's very much an emotional, spiritual guy. He listens to anything I question and gets filled with wonderment over it but that's about it. Can't get much out of it either."

"Sad. You must be terribly lonely," Azula said. Sokka's smile waned.

"Guess… a bit."

She frowned, glancing at him in confusion. His eyes flickered towards hers too, a smidge of guilt in his eyes… did he feel bad for saying that, when she had been acquainted with far worse loneliness for far longer? Or…?

It struck Azula suddenly that he was choosing to travel with her, someone who wasn't a total stranger simply because they had been enemies for too long for that to be the case. As much as he might pry into her business, he had done very little of opening up, himself. Why hadn't his girlfriend joined him on this journey? Why wasn't she part of his investigations? Why hadn't he tried to argue with his friends, reason with them, so that they could be part of this confusing journey over Yue, too?

Was he as lonely as she was?

"Anyway, uh… sorry if I'm too annoying," Sokka said, with a tight-lipped smile. "I'm not trying to piss you off, believe it or not, I just… was having fun. At your expenses, yes."

"Which would certainly justify me pushing you off the balloon if I cared to," Azula said. Sokka chuckled and nodded.

"Yeah, it'd be fair. But anyway, uh… we're in this balloon indeed."

"Yes."

"Where are we going?"

Azula frowned: they were evidently floating south, but they hadn't chosen any destinations just yet. She frowned as she raised the cup she had emptied earlier, urging Sokka wordlessly to fill it again: she needed to talk to Yue.

The Moon Spirit was quick to smile brightly once she realized Azula had as good as summoned her anew. The utterly ridiculous situation didn't go lost on Azula, even now. She most likely would never grow used to this, truth be told…

"Where are we going?" Azula asked, bluntly. Yue's smile froze on her face. "You said you want to see the world? Well, tell me what you want to see and we'll figure out how to make it happen. But without any directions we're just going to float aimlessly and burn through our fuel, so… care to make matters clear now, Yue?"

"Right, right. I'm sorry. I didn't really tell you what my idea was, and you're on your way nowhere because of that…"

"I don't need rambling apologies, I just need an answer: where are we going? What exactly do you want to see?"

"Oh. Well. I actually… I've thought about it a little bit, while you weren't around, and I realized there's two things I'd like to do. First… well, I want to see a lot of the world, the cities and nations I never could visit while I was alive. But more than that… I want to see the other seasons. Spring, summer, fall… I've only ever known winter. So… that. That's what I want."

"You want to see… the spring," Azula recited, blinking blankly and glancing at Sokka, who frowned at the words. "That's the directive. What do you think we should do to fulfill it? It's not going to be spring up here for another six months…"

"Not in the northern hemisphere… but it is spring in the southern one right now," Sokka said. Azula raised her eyebrows.

"Huh. That's true," she said. "Then… somewhere in the southern hemisphere, but not your home. That's basically winter too, isn't it?"

"Yeah, the Southern Water Tribe isn't exactly what she'll want to see," Sokka said, with a weak grin. "A place with more… flowers, I guess. That's probably the main thing she'd like, right?"

"Is it?" Azula said, glancing at the cup. Yue smiled and shrugged.

"In the south… that would be, well, anywhere below Omashu? I remember the maps, I saw many growing up…"

"Good to know you remember your geography. But yes, that's basically it," said Azula. Yue bit her lip.

"Say… there's one person I don't know much about, but I'd like to. And maybe a good place to start would be by seeing her hometown."

"Uh… who are we talking about, exactly? And where is that hometown?" Azula asked, crooking an eyebrow.

"I mean… Suki. Sokka's girlfriend."

"Huh?!" Azula winced. "Are you… are you a masochist? Yue, why would you…?"

"If she's someone Sokka loves, then… I would like to get to know what kind of person she is. He's going to spend his life with her, isn't he? I… I want to be sure she's a good person. Someone kind, someone good, someone worthy of him…"

"I'm not entirely sure he needs or deserves any of that… but I can assure you that, in all my cruelty, I would never inflict that kind of punishment on him," Azula said, with a grimace.

"What's going on now? I can't hear any of it, Azula," Sokka pouted. Azula grimaced, glancing at him with uncertainty. "Why is she a masochist? What is she asking for?"

"She…" Azula said, breathing deeply and shaking her head. "Well, she wants to meet your girlfriend, apparently."

Sokka's wide eyes spoke for themselves. Azula shrugged, gesturing at the cup in her hand.

"I'm simply saying it's absurd, right? She's your ex, that one's your new girlfriend, why would you want to bring them together at all…?"

"W-well, it's not like you'd scream to Suki that Yue is in a mirror or a water pool or…" Sokka said, running a hand over his hair nervously. "But… wait, she really did say that? You're not just pulling my hair and saying something just to find a weakness to exploit, are you?"

"Oh. So that's what you think I'm doing?" Azula asked, with a sardonic grin. Sokka huffed.

"Well, it's not like you haven't lied about whatever she was saying before, or were you always completely truthful?"

"He's right, you did lie about how I thought he was more handsome before…"

"You… quiet down," Azula snapped at Yue, who huffed and pouted. "Whether I lied before or not, I am telling the truth now and you don't believe me. Who does that remind me of…? Right, that person you called an idiot just a while ago! What does that make you, I wonder?"

Sokka winced: indeed, every conversation with Azula was as good as a minefield… and he refused to step on mines. Even if he set them off, he wouldn't lose his way. He breathed deeply and nodded.

"I… guess I did say that. And it's still true. But come on, cut me some slack here," Sokka said, looking at Azula helplessly. "Why would she ever want to meet Suki, of all people? She can't even meet her properly, to begin with…"

"She said something about getting to know the person you're going to spend your life with," Azula said. Sokka's eyes widened. "And frankly, while I can understand not wanting to take me to Kyoshi Island out of fear that they'll come chasing after us and try to kill me, it's rather odd that you would be so apprehensive about visiting your girlfriend, isn't it?"

"It's… w-well… it's just not the best time, I guess," Sokka said. Azula hummed.

"If this isn't the best time, then when will it be better?" she asked. "Yue wants to see the spring, and she wants to see it in Kyoshi Island. Not doing it now means delaying it a whole year, doesn't it? And who knows if you'll have sorted out your problems by then."

"Yeah, I… yeah," Sokka admitted, grimacing.

"So?" Azula said, raising her eyebrows.

"Wait… problems? What does that mean? Azula… is Sokka okay?"

"I have no idea. He's trying to be mysterious, is my guess," Azula answered Yue, who gazed through the water in anguish.

"Is she worried about me?" Sokka asked. Azula shrugged.

"I suppose she is, but she's been worried about you for years as it is, as far as I understand. Nothing new under the sun."

Her words gave Sokka pause. Azula frowned upon acknowledging as much, reading in his expression that he was distressed over potentially causing Yue's distress, too…

"I'm sorry. There's no real problem, I just… I wasn't expecting this, Yue," he said, with a weak grin. "We can go. I'm sure… I'm sure Suki will understand. I'll make her understand."

The way he spoke carried over none of the confidence his words would have warranted. Yue, however, didn't seem to pick up on that: she smiled brightly, giddily, at a skeptical Azula. The Fire Nation Princess raised an eyebrow, scrutinizing Sokka, wordlessly asking if he truly was fine with this course of action. A new, pained smile suggested he had already made up his mind… and so, the firebender sighed and shrugged.

"Very well, then. We shall set our course for Kyoshi Island."

...

"I don't understand. She should be here by now! We've been in the city for almost a month already!"

"Zuko, maybe they deceived you. Those girls could have done that…" Katara said, with a grimace. Zuko scoffed.

"You're not about to say I should've brought Toph along to interrogate them, are you?"

"Wouldn't have hurt," Katara said, with a shrug.

"She's busy recruiting metalbenders all across the Earth Kingdom, isn't she?"

"Well, I think she's in Ba Sing Se right now? Last thing I knew, at least," Katara said.

"And she was only just returning from Omashu when I told you guys about Azula. And for that matter, you're all busy too! I can't just… pluck you out of your lives for months to no avail, can I?" Zuko groaned, burying his face in his hands.

He sat with Katara, Aang and Bumi in a room within the Northern Water Tribe's Palace. The Avatar played happily with his son, and he shrugged at Zuko's mournful groans.

"I'm having a good time. So is Bumi," Aang grinned.

"Sokka had to go, sure, but he left without a hitch," Katara said, with a sigh. "And with just that weird letter. And he hasn't answered the one I set to him in Republic City yet…"

"See? This is not sustainable! What if Azula is gearing up to attack the Fire Nation while I'm gone?!" Zuko exclaimed.

"You don't have to raise your voice just because you're worried, Zuko," Aang pouted. "Calm down. Katara… do you want to go find Sokka? Would that make you feel better?"

"Would make me feel better to find my sister, too," Zuko growled at him.

"You're not my wife, I'm more worried about her, sorry to say," Aang said, grinning at Zuko. He rolled his eyes, shaking his head and dropping it on his hand as Katara smiled warmly, if with a hint of mischief, at the Avatar.

"I don't know. We could try to go and come back, though? I feel like we can't leave Zuko alone or he's going to lose whatever sanity he's holding onto," Katara pointed out.

"Am I holding onto any?" Zuko asked, shaking his head. "Here I thought it was all gone."

"Huh. That would explain staying here forever, on a single lead with no evidence, across a full month, wouldn't it?" Katara said. "Guess you really did lose your marbles."

"If he did, I could lend him these…" Aang grinned, raising his trick marbles: Bumi squealed happily at the sight of them.

"Da! I want! Da!"

"Here we go! Marble trick, just for you, Bumi!"

Zuko groaned, watching them play, careless about Aang and Katara's playfulness with the child. He couldn't stop thinking about his terrible decision-making… about how Azula never failed to teach him the wrong lessons. He fell into every trap, every pitfall, every…

"Fire Lord Zuko, sir? Fire Lord Zuko!"

Zuko jumped up from the cushion he had been sitting on, as though something had bitten him in the ass. The Fire Nation soldier that barged into the room, pushing past the curtain that hung on its threshold, looked considerably upset about whatever he had to inform him of.

"Did you find something? Did you find her?!"

"My Lord… there are tracks. We just found them, they're most definitely old, but… a hot-air balloon was left outside the city, in a cavern, and then it seems to have been taken away again. It looks like…!"

"Like the one she stole?" Zuko gasped. "The proportions of the tracks you found, they match…?"

"They do, sir. We believe it was her."

"She… she did come here. She came here…!" Zuko exclaimed – Aang and Katara were no longer quite as calm and easygoing as before, rising to their feet too. "And she left again. She… b-but why? What did she…?"

"Wait," Katara frowned. "Wait, Zuko…"

"What is it?" Aang asked her, as the Fire Lord turned towards the waterbender. Katara's eyes shifted from side to side, a hand slipping through her hair.

"A month ago… Sokka left us almost as soon as we arrived, right? And he… he took a bunch of things with him. His luggage, it looked like, but also food, from what the kitchens reported?"

"You think he's chasing after her?" Aang asked.

"Well, it's either that, which I doubt, considering he just wanted to find out what's up with the moon, or…" Katara said. Zuko's eyes widened.

"She… she did not. She could not! She wouldn't…!" Zuko gasped, shivering. The possibility only struck Aang moments later.

"You think… Azula kidnapped Sokka?" Aang gasped.

"She wouldn't have. She couldn't have, though, right?!" Katara asked, with a nervous laugh. "I mean, he picked up his stuff, so… so he had to be leaving deliberately."

"He did leave deliberately, but maybe she intercepted him halfway there," Aang reasoned, frowning. "Which means that Sokka isn't answering your letters because… he's not home. Wherever he is…"

"He's… where she is," Katara said, staring at Aang in horror. "Aang… my brother is Azula's captive? My brother is…!"

"That's… that's it. That's enough!" Zuko snarled, rage swirling inside him. "If this is truly what she's done, she's gone so far out of line that there's no line to speak of anymore! Forget it! We're going to find her, track her down now!"

"Y-yes, Fire Lord! We'll send word…!"

"To every corner of this planet. Every single nation!" Zuko bellowed. "Tell them she's a wanted criminal! Tell them she's traveling with the Avatar's brother-in-law! Send descriptions of them both… and tell them the Fire Nation will pay a massive reward to anyone who retrieves her, dead or alive!"

"D-dead?! Zuko…!" Aang gasped.

"I said… I've had it," Zuko snarled, shaking his head. "I'm done playing her games! I set the rules now! I'm Fire Lord, and she's not getting away with this for another second!"

Katara grimaced – she understood Zuko's anguish and fury… she couldn't, however, imagine ever giving out an order of the sort if her brother went off the rails somehow.

Which he might just have. It looked likely that Sokka's sudden vanishment might be connected to Azula's quick visit to the Northern Water Tribe, somehow… but a wretched, unwanted, guilty thought crossed her mind, and as much as she wanted to swat it away, it didn't go anywhere: what if he hadn't left in duress? What if her reckless, crazy brother had chosen to, somehow, hitch a ride with the Fire Nation Princess…?

There was no way he'd done that. He was busy investigating the moon. He couldn't have been so foolish, no matter if he was angry over how nobody took his problems seriously. He couldn't have joined up with Azula somehow just to get back at everyone for disregarding his concerns over Yue… or could he?

...

A journey on a hot-air balloon sounded far easier said than done. While the vessel was not exactly slow, it wasn't all that fast, either. They ran out of coal eventually, and they spent a fair few days looking for more supplies in the Earth Kingdom – Sokka knew a guy, it seemed he had friends everywhere, even earthbending friends in coal mines in the Earth Kingdom – before setting out anew, aiming to reach Kyoshi Island just as the springtime blossoms bloomed.

Sokka seemed to grow more nervous as they approached, but he held his own as they finally landed by the shore, in a grand cove where, as he explained, they might just witness some gruesome spectacles if the unagi decided to eat an elephant koi or two.

"Fascinating. The fishy princess shall be in the water to witness the carnage, too. Just the way she likes it," Azula mocked Yue as she stepped closer to the shore. Yue pouted, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Maybe the fishy princess can communicate with the fish and tell them not to eat each other," she suggested. Azula snorted.

"Go on, then. I'd like to see how that goes," she said.

"What was that…?" Sokka asked.

"She's biting back when I'm an asshole. Nothing much other than that," Azula said. Sokka chuckled.

"You know, it's weird but the two of you kind of make a fun team," he said. Azula scoffed.

"You take that back."

"I will not," Sokka declared, proudly. "You have about the most pointless things in common and you're completely opposites in just about everything else…"

"Wait. But I'm smart, aren't I? Are you saying Yue is stupid?" Azula smirked: in the water, Yue gasped, and Azula actually cackled at her reaction. Sokka scoffed, bumping her hip with his.

"Jerk. I didn't say that!" he said. "But the obvious points in common between you two is that you're both princesses and…! Uh, that's about it."

"Exactly, and if we're opposites in just about everything else…"

"She's smart too! Just, not in the way you are!" Sokka exclaimed, flustered, as he stalked out of the balloon's basket and approached the shore. "She's kind, and pure, and sweet, and you're mean, rude and… and…!"

"Spicy," Azula decided, smirking. Sokka's cheeks flushed. "What? It's the opposite to sweet, or isn't it? Maybe you wanted to call me salty instead? Acid?"

"You're impossible," Sokka groaned.

"Ah! That means you're possible, Yue! Congratulations!"

To Azula's utter confusion and surprise, though… Yue covered her mouth with a hand and laughed. Azula raised an eyebrow, not suspecting the girl would be amused by her bad joke.

"Well, I… I'm glad that amused you," Azula said. Sokka raised his head, glancing at her in surprise.

"You made her laugh?" he asked. Azula shrugged.

"She has a terrible sense of humor. Like mine, I guess. Or maybe ours. Yours is worse than mine, as far as I understand…" Azula said. Sokka smiled a little, glancing at the water again.

"Well, I'm glad she's happy to be possible. Guess we could go on playing that game later, but… for now, Yue, this is Kyoshi Island. As you can see, there are lots of trees with cherry blossoms this time of the year…"

Azula turned around to look too, just as Sokka was explaining. Yue seemed to struggle to see, but she smiled at every glimpse she got of the flourishing trees at either side of the shore they stood at right now. As much as Azula had expected Kyoshi Island to be nothing noteworthy – and the infrastructure of the towns she had seen as they flew over, towards the southern shore of the island, certainly wasn't –, the natural beauty of the place could not be denied.

"The first time I came here, it was, uh, fall? Maybe late fall," Sokka reasoned, brushing his stubble with a thumb. "And you really couldn't see how pretty it could be just yet. There was a fair bit of snow all over the place too, but most of the trees were pretty dry. I only got to see it like this when I visited later."

"Can you ask him… if he lives here?"

"Yue wants to know if you live in this place," Azula said. Sokka raised his eyebrows.

"Uh, no. I'm living in Republic City right now. Suki… well, she is here, or is supposed to be," Sokka said.

"Won't we go say hi?"

"Oh, this is burdensome," Azula rolled her eyes. "She asks if we won't say hi."

"Well, I thought… maybe later?" Sokka grinned awkwardly. "I figured we'd stay out here for a little longer and enjoy the view! I bet the unagi will show up soon and Yue can show you just how strong her control over fish is by then, right?"

"Right…" Azula said, glancing at the water again: Yue grimaced, and Azula smirked. "Or maybe she was just bluffing."

"I'm not! I… I was completely honest. I can… try?"

"Go on ahead, then, I dare you to…"

Azula couldn't finish the sentence when she heard a whistling sound in the distance.

Before she knew it, though, before she could so much as react, Sokka had tackled her to the ground.

She would have raged at him for it – she fell over a few rocks, and her knee had crashed against a particularly sharp one that had ripped her outfit, perhaps even drawn blood… but a glance to her left revealed around eight arrows, firmly sunken on the ground. They would have pierced their bodies if Sokka hadn't jumped when he did.

"What the…?!" Azula gasped: Sokka, atop her, pushed himself away from her while retaining a protective stance before her…

Turning to face a group of armed women in face paint, bearing dark armor upon their green uniforms.

Sokka snarled as Azula pushed herself up awkwardly: Yue, in the water, appeared to panic over the sudden attack, too.

"Are you okay? Azula…!"

"I'm fine. I'm fine…" Azula as good as mouthed at her, disregarding the pain of her knee.

"Brave of you to show your face around here," one of the Kyoshi Warriors said, startling both Azula and Yue: was she talking about her? Did Kyoshi Island issue a warrant for her arrest too? Or was she talking about…?

Sokka sighed, raising his arms defensively: the Kyoshi Warriors didn't lower their weapons.

"Where's Suki?" he asked. Azula raised an eyebrow: she recalled all too well when he had asked the same question to her, years ago… now, though, the tone with which he spoke couldn't have been more distant from what it had been on that day.

The apparent leader of this group of Kyoshi Warriors lowered her bow, though her hostile demeanor didn't shift yet. The others followed her example.

"She sent us to find out what kind of brigand had snuck into the island on a hot-air balloon. Guess we know now," the warrior said.

"Am I actually a criminal around these parts now?" Sokka asked, raising his eyebrows.

"Maybe you should be," the warrior growled.

"What the hell is going on?" Azula asked, pushing herself up. Sokka gritted his teeth, glancing back at her.

"Don't… just keep your head down. If they notice who you are…"

"Why does it look like they're ready to kill us, even though they haven't?" Azula growled.

"Well…" Sokka said, grimacing…

The answer to that question would be granted sooner than later, Azula supposed.

"Keep your hands up. You too," the warrior said. Azula scoffed.

"Please, do it," Sokka said. Azula rolled her eyes.

"I could set the whole lot of them on fire, just saying. I nearly did once."

"You don't need to do it again. Trust me."

"That's a tall order. I have no idea what's happening here, and I'm not sure I even want to know anymore."

Sokka sighed as the Kyoshi Warriors approached them: without further fanfare, they pushed Sokka and Azula to walk into a small road that eventually led to a humble fishing village, as far as Azula could tell… was that truly the backwater, rundown place Suki had been born to? Kyoshi's great home? It was laughable. Clearly, the Earth Kingdom had no idea how to properly honor its heroes…

They were embarrassingly paraded across the town, and as much as Azula did as Sokka had told her by keeping her head down, the unfortunate truth was that more than one person seemed to grow to suspect her identity rather quickly. None would do so faster than Suki herself, though…

Though the same was true, of course, to someone standing right inside the dojo she and Sokka were dragged to, where the older warriors had been instructing a new group of recruits.

"What…? No!" Ty Lee gasped at the sight of her, losing track of her mission at once. Azula cursed inwardly, rolling her eyes.

"Yue's already dead, but I think I'm going to kill her all over again for putting me through this…" Azula hissed. Sokka growled threateningly at her, and she responded by stomping on his foot.

"Ow! I…! Ugh, behave yourself! And… hey, Ty Lee! Nice seeing you again," Sokka said, with an awkward grimace as he inched away from Azula.

"What are you…?" Ty Lee gasped, hands over her hair. "Sokka, what are you doing here? And with Azula? That's even more messed up than just…! Goodness, we have to send word to Zuko at once, we…!"

"No!" both Sokka and Azula shouted at unison, startling the Fire Nation-born warrior.

"Look, I get how this looks, but this really isn't the time to overreact, Ty Lee," Sokka grimaced. "I know you don't understand what's going on, and I could explain if you let me, but…"

He trailed off when a dojo door, probably the one that led to the leader's office, swung open violently. Both Sokka and Azula watched with apprehension… as a shocked, confused, and ultimately furious Suki stepped into view.

"Sokka," she said. He swallowed hard.

"Hey," was his eloquent response.

"You… you showed up with…?" Suki said, glancing at Azula next. Her face shifted from confusion to disdain and disgust. Azula glared at her with no shortage of both things, too. "Well, isn't that rich."

"You certainly aren't, true," Azula said, with a dry grin. "This place could use a makeover or two. Might want to make a better first impression to first-time visitors such as myself…"

"Azula, stop being rude!" Ty Lee said, frowning. Azula responded with an eyeroll, making an ungodly effort not to raise her middle finger in the woman's direction.

"Don't worry… we sure will be rich, after Zuko pays us for capturing you," Suki said.

"Don't," Sokka said: to Azula's surprise, he stepped in front of her, and he breathed heavily as he gazed at Suki pleadingly.

He was… protecting her. Or rather, he was protecting Yue. Yes, that made far more sense… but he was still standing between her and a hostile party. That, in itself, was odd. A rather unusual experience Azula couldn't quite remember having lived through before. Usually, she was the threat others were protecting their allies from…

"Look… I know this is messy and I know you don't like it, but we need to talk. This is a lot more complicated than it sounds like, Suki," Sokka said. Suki offered him an unamused smile.

"I bet it is. As usual," she said, rolling her eyes.

"What would you rather do?" Ty Lee asked her, worriedly.

"I'll hear him out. Why not?" Suki said, with a dismissive smirk. "Might even help me be sure I've made the right choice all along and everything."

"Make any wrong moves and we will have no mercy," the warrior who caught them by the shore said. Azula scoffed, smirking at her.

"I'm all too aware of what Kyoshi Warrior mercilessness looks like… I can't say I'm scared," she smirked.

"You should be," the girl growled, her bravado failing to find its mark.

Sokka grimaced as he entered Suki's office: as much as they had been together for a long time, he hadn't actually visited this place all that often. Suki had been living in the Fire Nation, on the most part… then, she went to Republic City with him. A little over a year ago, she had returned home, permanently. He had merely visited her once since then… and it hadn't turned out quite as well as he would have liked.

So now, he marched into the room feeling the weight of a lost decade dragging him down to take his seat before Suki's desk. The Kyoshi Warrior Azula seemed to defy so much pushed her to take her seat by Sokka's side, and she didn't bother leaving afterwards, either. Azula scowled, glancing back at the door to find it closed… but there were at least seven Kyoshi Warriors inside the office. Most of them were looking at her, no doubt expecting they would need to subdue her… she wondered if Sokka would even try to help her, if it came to that. He might just back off and roll over, trying to make up for whatever he'd done to piss off Suki so much…

But that, in itself, was a whole other matter. Azula had sensed he wasn't being truthful about everything whenever the subject of Suki came up, but she hadn't anticipated anything quite like this. Had he cheated on her? Not that she'd blame him much, if he had. As averse as she was to betrayals, she had no love for the Kyoshi Warrior. Someone who treated her own boyfriend as a criminal probably didn't deserve much pity, anyway.

"Explain yourself," Suki growled, standing on the other side of the desk, refusing to take her seat. Moreover, one of her hands rested on her sword's hilt. Sokka gritted his teeth. "The last I knew, you were her prisoner. A campaign to hunt her down is underway, did you know that?"

"You… what? I was her prisoner?" Sokka frowned, glancing at Azula in confusion. She hummed, reclining carelessly on her chair.

"Let me guess… my dear brother picked up on the fact that I was, indeed, in the Northern Water Tribe. Your departure, by just leaving a suspicious letter, brought him and his friends to assume that I took you against your will," Azula said, with a wild grin. "Funny that he'd be so shortsighted. If I had wanted to take you that way, there would have been no letter to begin with."

"The wanted poster reached us barely yesterday," Suki said, spreading it before their eyes: Azula scowled at the sight of the unpleasant depiction of her facial features, which appeared to emphasize her mental instability with marks under her eyes and disorderly hair.

"Could've given me a smidge of dignity, the bastard," she hissed.

"I'm not entirely sure you deserve any, but frankly? You're not much of my concern right now," Suki said, surprising Azula. "You didn't take him against his will?"

"Nope," Azula said. Suki smiled unpleasantly… and then turned her attention to Sokka.

"Then I have no real qualms with her. If anything, maybe I should thank her," Suki said, dropping the poster and glaring at Sokka intently. "Otherwise, I guess I might have seen you again in, what, a decade? How long before you finally wrapped your head around the embarrassment you left in your wake, Sokka?"

"I…!" Sokka grimaced, covering his face with his hands. "Look, Suki, I'm sorry! I've told you so in every letter I sent you, but…!"

"You could have said it to my face. You should have said it to my face. And yet… even that isn't something you deigned to give me, is it?" Suki said: her voice gave away just how badly hurt she was. Azula blinked blankly, folding her arms over her chest and eyeing her uncomfortable traveling companion.

In doing so, her eyesight traveled a little further: a small mirror hung by the wall, an ornament, perhaps connected to superstition of some sort. Naturally, Yue's face peeked out of it, and she looked as confused and troubled by this sudden upset as Azula was. Sokka breathed out slowly and gazed at Suki with remorse.

"You're right. I fucked up, and I've been doing exactly that, constantly, for months," he said.

"For years, I'd rather say," Suki said. Sokka nodded.

"True. More accurate that way," he said. "But if you want to talk about this, don't you think maybe we ought to…?"

"Sokka, if I'm alone with you I might just end up beating you to a pulp. So no, I don't think so."

"Suki…"

"Let's go back in time for a minute and think about what brought us here, can we?" Suki said, arms folded over her chest. "You urged me to leave my job as Zuko's bodyguard so that I could move with you and live in Republic City. After many years of insisting on it, and by insisting, I mean basically every conversation we had, which weren't actually that many, suggested that we were only growing so distant because we weren't around each other constantly…!"

"Well, that's what I thought then! But…!"

"But what? By the time you finally had me to yourself, you realized you didn't actually want me at all?" Suki asked. Sokka grimaced.

"I got busy! A lot! It's not like being a council member in growing a city is easy, and honestly, I thought you'd want to involve yourself in…!"

"In the political side of things? Why, I didn't. I was ready to retire as a Kyoshi Warrior and start a life with you… and you weren't ready to do the same."

"Well, come on, now! How do you expect we would've gotten by if I had done the same thing? I would've had no job, no income, no way to buy a house or afford basic food…!"

"As if you couldn't have gotten a less demanding job: you don't even like politics!" Suki exclaimed, rolling her eyes. "You were miserable, grumpy, constantly in the shittiest mood and I got sick of it! More so once you started rambling about how the moon was acting up! Oh, the moon, everything's about the moon, we sure have time for the moon but not for the girl you actually were with…!"

"Suki, don't…" Sokka snarled: Azula glanced at Yue, who covered her face in apparent horror.

"And when I left because I was sick of it… you come to Kyoshi Island!" Suki smiled. "Just as I'm getting my life together, you decide you have to try to win me back somehow… and you sure tried, for two weeks you were the best you ever had been with me! You pushed yourself, you forced yourself to be the perfect boyfriend, of course you did! And then… and then, after the biggest festival, in which you even involved yourself, you organized a bunch of things, you helped make it the liveliest the island ever saw, you went down on one knee…!"

Azula's jaw dropped, glancing at Sokka in confusion: he was engaged? He had proposed to Suki? Why had he never…

"And said nothing."

Oh. Then he hadn't proposed after all.

"Suki, I'm…! You have no idea how bad I feel about it, you really don't, but…!"

"Don't give me your bullshit now," Suki said, shaking her head. "It was your chance to prove you wanted to be with me. That the moon wasn't the core and center of your entire existence, that you could love me for who I was and not just use me as some sort of rebound…!"

"How could you be a rebound after ten years of relationship? Suki, I loved you!"

"You did, now, did you? So why didn't you ask me to marry you? Why, Sokka, did you stop short of doing exactly that when you had the chance?"

Azula grimaced: it was hard to believe that Sokka had a problem of this magnitude… and that Suki apparently was completely correct to say that she had nothing to do with it. If the situation had any less importance, she might have joked around and asked for snacks with which to enjoy the argument… but even Azula knew better than to do that right now. Yue's anguish in the mirror actually moved a fiber in Azula's heart… the girl was anguished. She was terrified. When she had lost her way over that comet's appearance, when she had connected with Azula as she had… Sokka had seemingly lost his willingness to spend his life with Suki. Her problems, whatever they were, had caused his…

"Suki… no answer I give you will help," he said. Suki gasped, looking at him in disbelief. "I thought I was ready. I chickened out. And you know why I ran away?"

"Why, probably because the entire island would have hunted you down otherwise?"

"Because I would have done it again!"

Suki froze. Azula grimaced as Sokka rose to his feet, gritting his teeth, fists tight.

"I wasn't ready. I might never be ready. I wanted to be the man you deserved, I tried! But I failed. No man would chicken out at that stage when he's sure of what he wants in life. And I thought I was sure… but I wasn't. I hesitated. You don't deserve to be with someone who hesitates. Someone who doubts they're making the right choice when it should be the best choice they ever made."

"You… you were questioning that you wanted to marry me, then, right as you were on your knees?" Suki asked, with a dry grin. "Well, why didn't you think about that before going down on one knee indeed? Why couldn't you spare me the humiliation, the fury, and just say to my face that you were done with me?!"

"I… I was stupid," Sokka said.

"Understatement of the century," Suki growled.

"I never wanted to break your heart," he said. "But I… I didn't know I could walk away until I did it. I didn't think you'd want me in your life again after that."

"No kidding, I don't. I frankly don't," Suki said. Sokka gritted his teeth. "And you're here now with… the most absurd kind of company, hoping that I'll forgive you, maybe? Whatever you came here to do…"

"That's not why I'm here."

Azula winced: she glanced at him almost pleadingly, trying to get through to him. Sokka ignored her, and Azula shook her head: if he was hellbent on digging deeper once he was in a hole, she sure wasn't going to stop him…

"I… may have learned something about what was going on," Sokka said, gritting his teeth. "With… with the moon."

"Ha! Fascinating. And you thought I'd want to know that?" Suki smirked, derisively. "How very nice of you to drop by in person to do that. You could've written a letter to say whatever you found out instead…"

"This is… difficult to explain," Sokka said, gritting his teeth.

"No doubt. Because I can't see how it involves Azula in the least," Suki said, harshly.

"Would you feel better if I explained that part myself…?" Azula offered. Sokka shook his head.

"Thanks, but no thanks," he said.

Azula shrugged: that was about all the generosity she would offer him… no doubt, he expected her to tell the story in such a way as to make matters look worse than they were. She might have done that out of sheer amusement over chaos… but she wasn't quite sure she wanted to stir the pot of Sokka's estranged relationship with Suki any further. Her personal inexperience with relationships made these waters particularly awkward to navigate…

"Something's actually happened to the Moon Spirit. We don't know what," Sokka said, firmly. "But Azula… somehow has become the host of Yue's spirit? To a fault?"

"She… what?" Suki said, glancing down at Azula in confusion. Azula blinked blankly, offering her a dry grin and a small wave.

"That doesn't make any sense," Ty Lee said, stepping closer and staring at Azula intently. Her intervention soured Azula's smile all over again. "That can't be true, Sokka, she only has her usual awful aura, no one else's…!"

"Maybe Yue's aura is as awful as mine and that's why you can't see it," Azula said, with a dry grin.

"Is it, really?"

The reflection of Yue in the mirror might have spoken… but Azula saw her silhouette awkwardly reflected on Ty Lee's dark breastplate, instead. She huffed, shaking her head – of course Ty Lee would decide everything was a lie. Someone as dishonest as her, judging others over dishonesty, was certainly a dark joke...

"It's not as simple as what you think. I don't mean that Yue is like… inside Azula as literally as that," Sokka said. "She sees her in mirrors or reflective surfaces. Like metal, or water, or…"

"She's in your armor right now, actually," Azula said, grinning in a most unpleasant way at Ty Lee, who winced and looked down at her breastplate. Yue swallowed hard and waved, even, but nobody could see it besides Azula, as always.

"You… you're joking," Suki said, looking at Sokka skeptically. "You're not seriously trying to tell me you believe that…!"

"Azula knows things she can't possibly know otherwise," Sokka said, looking at Suki helplessly. "Things I… never told anyone."

"Ah. Of course," Suki said, with a dry grin. "I bet it's got to be real fun, sharing stories about your first love with Azula. No doubt she's very understanding and empathetic and… and everything I never was, apparently, huh?"

"Suki, you didn't exactly make it easy for me to open up to you either, so as much as I'll own up to my shit, please own up to yours," Sokka snapped. Suki scoffed. "I can't get over what happened with Yue just because it'd be more convenient if I did. It's something I'm bound to feel guilty over until the day I die…!"

"Then tell Azula to convey all those concerns to Yue, why don't you?" Suki said, sarcastically. "I'm sure Yue will tell you it's all fine, she forgives you! She has no trouble accepting you again after you spent ten years with me, surely! But me, I'm the jealous fiend who can't even fathom her boyfriend having a first love that wasn't her… because, you know what, maybe that really is what I am! Because you were mine! Because I met you first, and somehow you latched onto her in a way that you never did over me!"

"Suki, if I'd just broken things off with Yue, this wouldn't be the mess it is," Sokka said, fiercely. "I didn't just end a relationship: she died in my arms! How do you expect me to just get over something like that?!"

"I don't know, but clearly, I'm out of line. And I'd like to extend that to being out of your life, next," Suki said. Sokka closed his eyes, shaking his head too. "It's a damn formality to say it at this point… but it's over. I'm done with this. I'm done with you. I'm sick and I'm tired of this nonsense… and I can't stand another second of being second place to a goddamn orb in the sky. I'm done."

"Fine," Sokka said. Suki scowled at him. "It's over. Find someone who can give you everything you want, Suki. You deserve that much."

"I'd say so do you… but you don't know what you want to begin with. You're bound to just take Azula on some ridiculous journey that will break her so she'll end up fully possessed by Yue and then… then you'll get to be with her again! Is that what your plan was, by any chance? Because considering how obsessed you are with her…!"

"Could you stop talking about her, about me, that way?!" Sokka exclaimed. "I'm not a monster, Suki!"

"Hard to tell lately," Suki snapped. Azula winced upon hearing those words. "You've done enough breaking my heart as it is. Might be it was about time I did it right back. Honestly, I'm glad you came. I'm glad I could say all of this to your face. Goodbye, and good riddance."

"That's… that's it?" Sokka asked, with a dry grin. "You're letting us leave, just like that?"

"Ah, right. She's a wanted criminal. I'll let Zuko know she was here, if that's what you…"

"No! That's exactly the opposite of what I… Suki!"

"Why shouldn't I tell him? In fact, why shouldn't I restrain her so Zuko can collect her, and then I could feed you to the unagi? That might actually make me feel better," Suki said, with a dry grin.

"Well, goodness… someone's trying to give me a run for my money," Azula said, staring at Suki with wide eyes. Her words actually gave her pause. "Feeding your boyfriend to the unagi? Or ex-boyfriend, as the case might be… that's something else entirely."

"I'm sure you'd relate if you'd ever had a relationship like this. But that would require finding someone who could stand to be in close proximity to you for longer than five minutes," Suki said. Azula smirked.

"Well, Sokka and I have been on this journey for well over a month now. Sounds like I've had more intimacy with him than you in recent times, huh?"

Suki's glare was fierce… but this time, Sokka didn't step in to stop Azula from saying outrageous things. Instead, he stood in place, brow furrowed, clearly displeased and disappointed.

"We're not here because we want to mock you or ridicule you. In fact, now I realize why it looked like Sokka never wanted to come here in the first place," Azula said, with a dry grin. "We came here… because Yue wanted to see the spring. To see the world she never had a chance to when she was alive. And she can't just pass over from me to someone else, because trust me, I've tried to make it happen and it hasn't. So, if Sokka wants to fulfill Yue's last will, he has to do it with me, like it or not."

"If any of this is true, and I sincerely struggle to believe it could be…" Suki said, glaring at Azula. "Why here? It's spring in a lot of other places in the world. You didn't have to bring her here, if she's even there at all and you're not just conning Sokka somehow…"

"Frankly, if I wanted to con someone, I'd pick someone a lot easier to deceive than this annoyance," Azula said. Sokka grimaced: was that a compliment or an insult? Was it both? "It'd be too much work, don't you think? But at any rate… we're not here because Sokka missed Kyoshi Island's spring: it's because Yue wanted to know what this place was like. She wanted to know… what Sokka's girlfriend was like."

Suki froze in place: she didn't believe any of it… but Azula's words gave her pause, even so.

"One hell of a first impression you've made, I dare say," Azula smirked. "Guess she'll be happy to know there's no more competition over Sokka's heart anymore, if nothing else. And of course, having the unagi eat him means she'll meet him in the Spirit World that much sooner and they'll get away with being together forever while you're…"

"Shut up!" Suki snapped.

"Azula…" Sokka said, eyeing her pleadingly now. She shrugged, raising her hands innocently.

"I'm just saying…"

"What is any of this to you, though?" Ty Lee asked: Azula's mood darkened again as she glared at Ty Lee.

"I could very well ask you the same thing. Doesn't even make sense to me that you're here at all, in Kyoshi Island, but it's even less logical that you'd be in this room right now… nobody called you in, so you can very well leave so neither of us has to bear with being in each other's presence for longer than necessary. That's about as civilized as I'll be with you."

Ty Lee gritted her teeth, tearing her gaze away from Azula. The fallen Princess scowled before turning her attention to the irate Suki again.

The leader of the Kyoshi Warriors let out a cry of frustration, kicking at her desk in irritation as she covered her face in her hands: she had too much information to process, too much anguish to work through. Clearly, she didn't want to do it right now, in front of them.

"I… I'll let you go. Both of you," she said. Sokka's eyes widened. "I don't… don't care how true your damn stories about Yue may be. I don't. I'm done with this, done with you, and you're going to get lost and not return until I finally feel like I can exist anywhere near you again, Sokka. And I will tell Zuko…"

"Suki, please don't. I beg you, as much as you may hate me…!"

"You have one day before I send word," Suki said. Sokka froze. "Nobody… nobody will bother you until then. Get out of this island, go wherever you care to, and stay away from me. That's all you need to do. Am I clear?"

"You… yeah. Loud and clear," Sokka said, frowning: it hardly felt like generosity… but that certainly was as good as he'd ever get from Suki by now. "For what it's worth, I'm sorry it came to this."

"No, you're not."

Azula's chest tightened: she'd heard those same words once before, just after she offered an apology of that nature. It had been false, when she spoke it… it wasn't, in Sokka's case. In neither case, however, it changed that the person they spoke to had refused to believe them by principle alone.

"Get out. And for your sake, leave before I regain my senses and have you chained and locked down for Zuko to take you to face his justice," Suki said, glaring at Azula.

"Very well," Azula said, raising her hands defensively and standing next to Sokka. "Let's walk back-to-back, shall we? I'm not sure I trust them not to try to stuff us full of arrows again. Though, do tell, what exactly would you have told Zuko if your troops had killed me by accident?"

"What makes you think that would have been a problem?" Suki said, raising an eyebrow. "I suppose I'd have to answer to Katara if I killed her brother, but you?"

She handed Azula the wanted poster. Azula's heart pounded with anxiety as she pulled it open, not focusing on the picture this time…

Wanted: dead or alive.

Her eyes widened. A burst of fear, one she had experienced sparsely, bloomed a lot more powerfully than before. Sokka clasped the poster, gasping upon reading its contents.

"Feel free to take it," Suki said, dismissively. "I don't particularly care to collect paintings of Azula. Just get out now, I… I can't look at either of your faces anymore."

Sokka gritted his teeth. He urged Azula to get going, placing a hand on her shoulder and guiding her away. He reached the doorway, knowing all the Kyoshi Warriors were watching him, and he cast a final glance at Suki.

She held his gaze for one moment. Regrets, pain, confusion poured between them… things had soured beyond belief, beyond repair. One day, perhaps, they might be friends again. One day, perhaps, they might build bridges, if just small ones. But as far as their relationship was concerned, there would never be another chance for them. Unlike Zuko and Mai, and their countless breakups and returns to each other, this was it for Suki and Sokka.

"Goodbye," Sokka said, finally.

Suki might have expected something else. Something more vindictive, something more cruel… but that was cruel enough to make her snarl, covering her face with her hands as she wept at the loss of the one man she had truly loved. He walked away without offering her any comfort. Not that she would have taken it, if he had offered any at all. He had a destiny that didn't involve her, Suki had suspected and feared as much for a long time… but now she was entirely certain of it. Their relationship would never recover from a blow as harsh as this one had been… and that would be for the best. She had already known they were over… it was as good as a formality to confirm as much.

But to think he had been with Azula for over a month… to think he could stand to be with someone as dangerous, as unhinged, as wild as her, but not Suki? When he finally had tried, he had wound up running away. Why? What had she done wrong? Why had she lost him? Why…?

She glanced at the mirror Azula had constantly glanced at. Fear reared its head again… as she wondered if, perhaps, Yue had wanted to find out whether Sokka's girlfriend was worthy of him or not. If their twisted story was true at all… then she would likely conclude the opposite, instead. Suki had envied Sokka's bond with Yue, resented it… she had never been able to understand or accept it. She had wanted to be his first love… she had wanted to be his only love. Her failure to accept Yue, to show Sokka that he could trust her, that he could talk to her about the Princess of the Northern Water Tribe, that he could open up to her and she'd embrace it… was that why they had failed? Was that why their love had crumbled? Was it her fault? Or was it his?

Was it simply that they just weren't meant to be?

The town wasn't much to look at, Azula thought so again as they marched through it and out into the wilderness anew. It was already growing darker by the time they returned to the same shore where they had nearly been shot full of arrows: Kyoshi Warriors watched them from afar, as though to ensure they would indeed leave, as they were supposed to. Azula glared at them before focusing on Sokka again. He sighed, approaching the water anew… and dropping on his knees in the sand. A heavy frown decorated his face as Azula sat beside him, legs crossed.

"I… didn't quite expect that to turn out so poorly," Azula said. "But I did read from your behavior all along that you didn't really want to come here."

"I didn't. I also didn't think failing to propose to your girlfriend was a capital offense in this island, but what do I know?" Sokka said, dropping heavily on the sand, falling on his back. "I didn't tell you because… well, who wants to admit something that embarrassing in the first place? But I honestly didn't know for sure that it was over, simply because we never made it official that it was…"

"Running away from your lover for about a year sounds a little official to me," Azula said. Sokka sighed.

"It's complicated, okay?" he said. "There's… a lot more baggage here than you think. For one thing, well… the truth is I wasn't ready for a relationship when I got together with Suki. Yes, it started as a rebound, without a doubt, and I thought it'd be good for me. But then you captured her and I kind of took for granted that you'd have killed her, so…"

"You did?" Azula asked, raising an eyebrow. "Is that why you started crying when I told you she wasn't dead?"

"Well… it meant I had failed her. I hadn't tried to save her, had I?" Sokka sighed. "I never even thought about doing it. And then? After Zuko joined us, I… I asked him where important prisoners would be taken. Which is how I wound up at the Boiling Rock."

"Ah, yes. Fun times," Azula said, bitterly.

"I know that place has to be a nightmare to think about, for you," Sokka said. "But on my end, the truth is that I… I didn't go to the Boiling Rock to find Suki, Azula. I was looking for my dad."

Azula froze. She blinked blankly, glancing at Sokka in confusion. He covered his face with his hands, groaning in irritation.

"I wanted… to find him and make up for how I'd failed him. He got captured in the invasion, and I felt so guilty and… and when we got there? I didn't find him, but I found Suki, at first. I rolled with the punches, you know, but… a part of me always wondered if she'd have wanted me back at all, if I ever told her the truth."

"Did you never tell her…?" Azula asked. Sokka shook his head. "Huh. My, my…"

"It sounded like a bad idea at every point in time. Things were never going as well between us as they might have looked like," Sokka said. "At first, because I basically never really needed to be with her, and it was just fun to come across her whenever our paths converged, you know? Like… like your picking coins out of fountains, maybe."

"Pfft. So Suki was a lucky coin lying on the pool before you?" Azula asked, amused. Sokka groaned.

"Sounds like an awful metaphor but most of all because it still… feels true," he sighed, pushing himself back up to a sitting position. "I decided we could do better than that eventually, right? That's why I spent so long trying to convince her to come join me in Republic City. But… things weren't exactly great after she moved in, you know? She had her way of doing things, and I had mine. And the conflicts we got into weren't exactly fun. She always had her way in the end, but always got so upset when we clashed to begin with and… it felt awful. Like I couldn't do anything right. And maybe I couldn't, but maybe I just stopped trying… because I was sick of working for something that never made sense. I constantly found myself thinking… is this what I was looking for? Is this what love is supposed to be like? And… and I guess after she got sick of it and left, I convinced myself that it had to be. That I had to prove I would be there for her. So, I came here, and I tried my damn best. I did everything her way. I never questioned anything again. I agreed with everything she said, and I…"

"You were killing your own spirit just to ensure hers would thrive?" Azula concluded. Sokka gritted his teeth, closing his eyes tightly too.

"And when it came down to it… marrying her meant doing that for the rest of my life," Sokka said, glaring at the horizon. "I thought… it wasn't fair, was it? And on top of that, the moon had started acting up. The real reason why she left Republic City exactly when she did? It's because I was worried about it. Instead of offering to help somehow, or providing comfort, or… anything? She just… got jealous, I guess. I don't know why she never could wrap her head around my relationship with Yue. It might be my fault because I never opened up about it in the first place… but she didn't exactly make it easy either."

"Why?" Azula asked, raising an eyebrow.

"The first time I nearly kissed her, well… I had told her I lost someone I loved. I meant Yue," Sokka said. "She said she could relate because she liked someone who 'went away'. She was obviously flirting and talking about me and… and it felt like all she wanted was to be with me, which, you know, that's flattering! But she never really stopped to understand why I wasn't ready. It… it didn't seem to matter much that I wasn't. And I forced myself to go for it because… I thought it'd help. I thought that I might learn how to move on if I was with someone else. But I didn't."

"You've been with her for all this time while feeling… like you can't truly be yourself with her, then?" Azula asked, folding her arms over her chest. "Well, that almost makes it sound like I'm far better off staying single as I have been all this time. Beats having to deal with that kind of nonsense. I have enough problems in my life as it is."

"I'd tell you you're missing out, but unless you actually can bond with someone who's ready to go the distance for you, and for whom you'd do the same? Yeah, maybe it's not," Sokka sighed.

"Is… is that what you and Yue were like, then?" Azula asked. She glanced at the water, and she saw Yue's refracted reflection in it. It was hard to judge her reactions from this angle, so close to the water…

"Honestly? I don't know," Sokka admitted, with a sad smile. Azula raised an eyebrow. "I know I was ready to do anything for Yue, far faster than I was for Suki. I didn't need to talk myself into doing it, it came out naturally. But… I don't know if she felt the same way. I don't know if she ever really loved me to the point where she'd do anything for me. Maybe… maybe I wouldn't have loved her as much, if she had."

"Wait, what?" Azula blinked blankly.

"She loved her people, Azula. She loved her city, her hometown, her family… I wasn't the only one who lost Yue when she became the Moon Spirit," Sokka said, gazing at the darkened moon again: it hovered before them, in the twilight sky. "And if she had not made that sacrifice just because she wanted to be with me, well… the world as we know it would have been ravaged by the Ocean Spirit and we'd all be dead, likely. So… she made the right choice. I wasn't the right choice for her… just as I'm not for Suki. I probably never was. She's better off without me."

"Well… I'd rather say you're better off without her," Azula told him. Sokka smiled a little, looking at her in disbelief. "Truly, though… someone who stifles you to that extent should not be your partner. I would never stand for it."

"You're too headstrong for that. I ought to learn a thing or two from you," Sokka chuckled.

"Finally, someone realizes that. You're certainly smarter than most, Sokka. Congratulations," Azula smirked, and he laughed even louder.

That he could laugh at all after a break-up was quite surprising. Perhaps ending that relationship was more akin to loosening a heavy weight upon his shoulders… Azula bit her lip, nudging him lightly with her foot by swaying it to the side, bumping it into his boot.

"Are you alright with this?" she asked. "All of it? It almost feels like… you were ready for the break-up to happen by now. But if you're not feeling up for this weird journey of ours anymore…"

"I thought you'd be more upset to know we're being hunted now. Especially on those terms," Sokka said, glancing at her with unease. Azula scoffed.

"Well, Zuzu has decided to come out and play, I suppose," she said. "Not that I'm all that worried or scared. He's about as threatening as a tadpole. At worst he'll spread some disgusting disease on me, but…"

"You're sure you want to underestimate him to that extent?" Sokka asked. Azula scoffed.

"Underestimate?" she said.

"He has the power of his entire nation behind him," Sokka said. "And he's in good terms with the other nations' leadership too. He has a terrible temper. And I don't know if his patience has really run its course by now."

Azula frowned. She glanced at the wanted poster she was still holding: the art was outrageous, the threat of death was preposterous… but was it that genuine? Did Zuko truly not care whether she was alive or dead anymore?

"Do you really think he… he's reached that point now?" Azula asked. Sokka gritted his teeth upon hearing genuine fear in her voice. "I mean… I could fight him. I know I could. I'm stronger than him, always have been, but… I suppose, if he catches me off guard? Or, of course, if he reaches out to you in secret and convinces you to turn on me…"

"He would fail," Sokka said, simply. Azula huffed.

"So confident and certain, are you?" she said. "Why should I trust that you'll never turn against me?"

"Well… for starters, I don't want to," Sokka said. Azula raised her eyebrows. "Like I said, our conversations are about the best ones I've had in… well, maybe ever. Might be the only thing that rivals this is when me and my dad discuss anything we're both really interested in, but that's different anyway…"

"So, I have to live on for you to talk to me. I could do that from the inside of a jail cell, now, couldn't I?" Azula said, skeptically. Sokka smiled.

"You could. But then you wouldn't be able to take Yue on this crazy trip and we'd all be poorer for it," he said. Azula huffed.

"Of course. Well, I suppose I owe you something after all, fishy princess," Azula said: Yue grinned from the water, as good as clapping enthusiastically, and Azula smiled before shaking her head. "Be as cheerful as you want to be… the truth is you're sorry for how things turned out here, aren't you?"

Yue's enthusiasm reeled back, and she sighed.

"I… I didn't know Sokka was going through something so difficult. I guess neither did you, so… we had no warning. We really didn't. Say… you should scold him for me."

"Scold him?" Azula repeated. Sokka raised his eyebrows as Yue pouted.

"We deserve his honesty. We're all in this together, aren't we? If… if he's troubled, or in pain, or anguished, he should tell us about it. It's only right. If we can help him sort it out, we will. If we can't, well… we'll just sit in silence with him and let him know he's not alone."

"Huh," Azula said. "Well, Sokka, it appears you pissed her off."

"I… what?" Sokka said. Azula chuckled as Yue scrambled to contradict her.

"Fine, it's not quite as bad as that… but she says you need to come clean about complicated, difficult, troubling things," Azula said. Sokka gazed at her in confusion. "She says we'll help you sort it out. Now, I don't know who exactly told her she could make that kind of decision for me, but she appears to be making it anyway…"

"Oh, please! You're sitting with him by the beach, talking out his problems, talking about yours! Even if I hadn't said anything about helping Sokka from now on, you'd already have done it without my prompting you!"

Azula had no answer for that. Yue didn't often lash out, but it was even rarer when she could leave her speechless too. Sokka blinked blankly, recognizing Azula was reacting to something… not realizing what it was, however.

"What happened now?" he asked. Azula grimaced.

"She's, uh, accusing me of being dishonest about that last thing, I suppose," Azula said. "Didn't really notice I was being quite so nice to you. No worries, Sokka, it won't happen again…"

"I wouldn't mind if it did."

"Hence why it won't."

Sokka chuckled, shaking his head and relaxing on his forearms again. Azula glanced at him wistfully, somehow uncertain about their silence now, even if it shouldn't have bothered her.

"I… never realized things between you and Suki weren't all perfection, even though it makes enough sense that they weren't," Azula said. Sokka shrugged.

"Eh… happens at times. Not everyone can be like my sister and Aang, clearly," he said. Azula sighed.

"Clearly," she repeated. "You've had worse luck with these things than I have, feels like."

"Why? Never had a boyfriend who turned into the moon? Or one you dated liberally and weirdly for ten years only to realize you actually made no sense together, leading you to run away right before a marriage proposal?" Sokka asked, with a bright, sarcastic grin. Azula snorted.

"Never had a boyfriend at all, rather," she said. Sokka's eyebrows rose. "I've never really… had anything of the sort. So it's difficult to fathom your point of view, I'd say. It doesn't make a lot of sense for you to be this devoted to Yue after she died, as far as I can tell. You get nothing out of it. You cut things off with Suki and you seem to think it'll be for the best for her, too… I would dare say she's not entirely certain of that, considering her last-minute leniency. Apparently, you're a better catch than you appear to be."

"Why, thank you. That's about the nicest thing you've ever said about me," Sokka said, with a dry grin. Azula bowed her head towards him.

"I do try," she said, mockingly. He laughed, shaking his head. "My point is, though… judging by what you've been through, it feels like it's not worth it. You're putting in efforts that will yield no results… Yue can't come back, can she? Even if you help her experience and see everything she couldn't… there's no true reward for what you're doing, is there?"

"Love isn't about rewards," Sokka said. Azula frowned. "At least, not for me. When I love someone, I want what's best for them. I want them safe, happy, healthy… at peace. If Yue has been anguished over my life, over how I've handled my romantic partners, over how I've been suffering over what's going on with the moon? I'd definitely like to appease her and help cheer her up. I don't know if I can get my life together… but if it'll help her find peace of her own, I'd love to do it."

"You want a decent life… for other people's sake, rather than your own?" Azula asked, skeptical. Sokka smiled awkwardly.

"Guess you're about to call me an idiot for that, are you?"

Azula grimaced, though she didn't say anything this time. Sokka raised an eyebrow. Her gaze drifted towards the water… then she shook her head abruptly.

"I was told… that what you've described is not love. So perhaps you've deceived yourself all along… or those who said that to me were mistaken, but that seems unlikely."

"What?" Sokka said, pushing himself up fully. "What does that mean?"

"It means… that kind of devotion is something I'm familiar with," Azula said, with a shrug. "You give and you give, you do everything for the other person with absolutely no concern as to whether your efforts are reciprocated or not. And if it kills you, if it destroys you? That's the least of your concerns. It's worth it, you think… and then some smug know-it-all pretending to be a medical expert shows up to tell you that all those things are terribly unhealthy and that that's not love at all, that you are not loved, that you were never loved, and that what you were doing wasn't love either. So… I'm sorry to say that you might be as lost in life as I am. A sad place to be in, isn't it?"

Sokka frowned, sitting upright properly again. He seemed to mull her words over for a moment, and Azula eyed him skeptically as he did.

"You're talking about your father, aren't you?" he asked. Azula winced, tearing her eyes from him again.

"It's not just him," she said. "My… my nation, altogether. I… I did everything I could to fulfill my duty. None of it went against our code, our belief system. But in comes Zuzu, breaking every precept, every doctrine, allied with our long-time enemies, pretending to be the answer, the beacon that the nation should follow… and they do exactly that, without questioning it just because he has a crown on his head. No one… no one fought for me. No one protested my treatment. No one demanded that I, the truly loyal child of the Fire Lord, was given any dignity. I was stuck in a damnable straight jacket, fated to rot in that damn place until Zuko… until he needed me for his own ends. And to hell with what I wanted, what was good for me, what I deserved, what I was owed…! None of it mattered. None if it has ever mattered. I'm just… the annoyance to be rid of. The pest that assails and burdens the poor innocent people with her antics and her madness. Why… why did I do any of what I did during the war? Why did I follow my father's beliefs and constantly fulfilled his expectations when he discarded me just as well? He must be brimming with pride over Zuko right now… the son he made stronger by treating him like a pebble in his shoe, a problem to be rid of. And Zuko came back, over and over again, to prove him wrong. Which is exactly what he wanted, worth noting… he just expected Zuko wouldn't go as far as to betray him, but even so, he must be thrilled that his firstborn would claw for power by any means necessary. Just as he did."

"Any means necessary?" Sokka asked.

"He didn't win our Agni Kai," Azula said, with a dry grin. "He would have, make no mistake… but he became Fire Lord because I got locked up in an asylum, not because he defeated me lawfully. The one time he had a chance to do it, I… I attacked your sister, as I'm sure you know. I knew I was losing, I shouldn't have been. Sozin's Comet was powering me, so… it was infuriating that Zuko would have control while I was losing mine. So, I tried to reclaim control. When your sister, for whatever reason, walked into the battlefield… I knew I could throw him off by attacking her instead. So I did that. He got burned when he jumped between my attack and your sister. The Agni Kai's winner is the one who burns the opponent. That's the basic rule. That's why my father defeated him, and he didn't even fight back that time. And… I burned him too, with lightning. And then your sister defeated me. And even then…"

"By that logic, Katara should be Fire Lord," Sokka concluded. Azula scoffed.

"What?"

"Well, you burned Zuko, she beat you, she wins the Agni Kai in the end. How about that, I'm the brother of the real Fire Lord," Sokka said. Azula's lips curled into a disbelieving smile.

"That's not what I… what?" she said. Sokka snickered.

"We should definitely bring it up to Katara. She'd demand her dues, you know she would. Fire Lord Katara, married to Avatar Aang… and Zuko deposed. Does it sound funny, at least?"

"Funny… and entirely unreasonable," Azula admitted, with a chuckle. Sokka smiled sadly at her.

"I'm sorry," he said, startling her. "No one… no one ever really bothered hearing your side, did they?"

"Well… why would anyone?" Azula asked. "I'm just… a nutcase who needs to be diagnosed, tossed into a cage and left to rot there. I'm a threat, a menace, a problem to be rid of. If given so much as a foothold of power, I will evidently use it to take revenge on everyone who ever wronged me, see? So… you should stop being so nice to me. It'll only backfire on you. You'll wind up regretting it…"

She said the last words with a mocking, sing-song voice that did nothing to hide the gravity of what she was talking about. Sokka grimaced, gazing at her with remorse.

"Guess… guess I'll try to brace myself for it, in case you do decide to do that," he said. Azula frowned, eyeing him skeptically. "But considering you haven't thrown me overboard off the balloon so far, and we've been traveling together for quite a while now…"

"Your terrible cooking sometimes tempts me to do it, just so you know," Azula pointed out. Sokka scoffed.

"Like yours is much better," he said. "Maybe, out of the three of us, Yue is the one who would have cooking skills, wouldn't you say?"

"Her?" Azula smirked, glancing at the water. Yue grimaced, flustered and uncertain. "She begs to differ, looks like. Besides, she and I are royal. You're the commoner. You're the one who should know how to…"

"Look, I can roast whatever I hunt or fish, but that's as far as my culinary talents extend," Sokka said, though a spark of an idea came to mind over Azula's previous words. "Though… just so you know? Back home, I'm kind of like a prince, myself."

Azula scoffed: in the water, Yue's eyes brightened upon hearing words she had first heard from him, so long ago. The Fire Nation Princess glanced at the Water Tribe one, finding her giggling sweetly over what Sokka had said. Azula blinked blankly before turning towards the smug non-bender…

"You're not," she said, curtly. Sokka scoffed.

"Am too! I'm the Chief's son, I'm privileged over everyone else, and that means I didn't need to cook to save my life because someone else was doing it for me for most of my childhood," Sokka grinned, proudly. Azula's jaw dropped. "So, see? For all that matters, I'm as royal as either one of you."

"Fancy that: we're the royal losers," Azula said: Sokka yelped, and Yue gasped. "No, but, really! I'm an actual Princess, and I lost my title, the throne that was granted to me, my nation, and I'm now a hunted criminal, aren't I? You… you're not really a prince and you're pretending to be one over weird motives, but even if you were somehow, you're on the run with me now and you most likely have nowhere better to go or nothing better to do if you're here… and Yue is seemingly a stowaway in my head, stuck in every reflective surface I ever see. Instead of living it up in golden palaces and gilded cages… we're on the weirdest trip I've ever been on, instead, and living like anything but royalty."

"The Royal Exiles…" Sokka said, with a slow smirk. Azula's eyes widened. "I like the sound of that!"

"You don't have to give us a name! Besides, I'm the only exile. You're just… weird. And Yue is, uh, gone," Azula said. "Figure out a better one that properly represents all our experiences or don't do it at all."

"Ugh, I'll have to think it over, but this is tricky, damn! You help me!" Sokka said, poking her ribs with a finger: Azula winced, hands instinctively in a defensive kata, and Sokka only smirked at her reaction. "Oooh… someone's ticklish."

"And someone's got a death wish. Don't you dare do that again, or you're going to pay for it," Azula said: as usual, the infuriating man with her only seemed to take her threats as challenges, going by the proud smile on his face.

"We'll see about that," he smirked, teasingly. Azula huffed.

"The Forsaken Royals," she growled. Sokka raised his eyebrows. "Why not?"

"That sounds very depressing," he said. "I want something more uplifting than that! Exiles at least sounds like we're on our way to have adventures and…"

"Misadventures, rather. The Royal Misadventurers?" Azula smirked. Sokka scoffed.

"I think we're a work-in-progress. Maybe that's what we ought to call ourselves," he said, with a slight smile. "I don't really know if there's something that binds us all together… but I guess it would be Yue, huh? She's the one who got attached to you, for whatever reason, and I joined this ride because of that."

"And for some reason you still haven't decided you've had enough of me and my malice… you're certainly an odd one, Sokka," Azula decided. "The Odd Royals…"

"Huh. That's a valid name, because we'd need one more member to be the Even Royals, after all…"

"You…!"

She snorted and burst out laughing. Sokka smirked proudly at the sound, watching as she rolled to the side, trying to keep him from seeing how embarrassingly she was laughing at his simple, foolish joke…

"T-that was… not funny. Not at all…" she said, returning to herself, a hand still over her mouth. Sokka smirked, nudging her foot with his this time.

"I think that is one thing we have in common, actually," he said. "All three of us. We laugh at bad jokes, even when we don't want to. Well, you don't want to, I don't mind laughing no matter who made the joke…"

"Because you're unrefined. I have some dignity to preserve," Azula said, smirking.

"Do you, now?" Sokka smirked.

"Well… maybe I'm not doing a great job of it right now, but I do," Azula said, her smile waning as she glanced at him. "You… are feeling better now?"

"Oh…" Sokka blinked blankly, frowning upon hearing the question. "Weirdly enough, yeah. I… heh. It felt pretty awful when it happened, and don't worry, I'm scared enough of Suki's wrath to know we'd better get going soon. But… maybe I should've just called it quits forever ago instead of letting it drag out. Strange, though, that just sitting here with you for a little while was… well, that helpful. Thank you."

"I… well, I won't make a habit of talking you out of your bad funks. So don't expect it to happen again," Azula said. Sokka smiled.

"That you did it now was enough, I think. You don't owe me anything," Sokka said. "If anything, I'm the one indebted to you. All the unresolved feelings and conflicts I had over Yue… you're helping me sort through them even if just by telling me about how she's doing. And you ended up helping me with Suki too, even if you didn't deserve getting dragged into it. I'm sorry that you did."

"Well, I'm not sorry to see the last of her, if I just did," Azula said, with a dry grin. "She'll always hold a grudge on me for defeating her back during the war. Which, yes, I'm sure you resent me for because we were enemies back then, but…"

"You know what?" Sokka said, with a slight smirk. "Since we're sharing terrible truths about how awful we are…"

"You… huh?" Azula blinked blankly. "You're not about to say you're glad I…"

"No, but I will say… one time she made fun of me and the others for losing fights as many times as we did, and I may or may not have shut her down by bringing up that she lost against you," Sokka said, with a guilty grin. Azula gasped, covering her mouth with a hand. "Yeeeeah… not my finest moment, true. Maybe that's when our problems really started, huh? Well, no, never mind, that was after the Boiling Rock after all…"

"You… used me to win an argument against your girlfriend?" Azula asked, with a devious smirk. "Careful, now. You're going to start growing on me, Sokka, and I don't think either of us wants that…"

"Azula, we've been stuck with each other for the better part of a month: we've grown on each other like weeds by now. Too late to worry about that at this point," he said, with a careless shrug.

"And you… don't mind that?" Azula asked. "Do I need to remind you of who I am? The scary criminal Princess who would set the world on fire if her mental state allowed her to…?"

"Honestly?" Sokka said, looking at her earnestly. "I get the feeling I'm only just getting to know who you really are."

Azula frowned. There was no hint of mirth in his voice, or his countenance…

"Those things you said… they're elements of you, but not the full picture," Sokka said, with a shrug. "And I barely even know how genuine any of it is anymore. For someone who apparently is a terribly dangerous criminal with no restraint, you sure have showed plenty for all this time."

"Just because Yue would be all too upset if I did anything that might hurt you," Azula said, rolling her eyes. Sokka smiled.

"Then may she protect me long enough to grow even more on you, to the point where you won't want to hurt me anymore by your own volition," Sokka grinned. Azula winced.

Did he understand what those words meant? She doubted it. He was a normal person, ultimately, regardless of his attempts to establish that he was like her, like Yue…

Azula sighed, shrugging in defeat. Sokka chuckled, reaching out to clap her shoulder gently.

"Come on, then. Let's get out of here before Suki changes her mind and starts hunting us right now," he said. Azula huffed.

"It sure is terribly inconvenient, traveling with a wanted criminal. Wanted for crimes of heartbreak and emotional distress on a Kyoshi Warrior… and somehow that makes you a far more serious menace than someone who's kidnapped children, stolen over half the assets in the Palace's safe chambers, torn the hulls of battleships just before they set out on important missions, among many other ordeals that cost the Fire Nation far more money and expenses than anyone ever could quantify…"

"What can I say? I'm truly that dangerous," Sokka said, lowering his voice menacingly, teasingly. Azula laughed, despite herself, shaking her head.

"What a pair we make. Uh, trio, rather," she said, glancing at the water. Yue, of course, giggled at Sokka's teasing words.

Azula couldn't quite help but smile, even if she feared she shouldn't have reasons to do so. There were more than enough reasons why Yue should have attached herself to anyone but her… but maybe after this conversation, after picking up on the main thing Sokka didn't have in common with them, Azula had started to suspect just why the Princess had chosen her, if she had chosen her at all.

Azula's people, her nation, had forsaken her. In their own way, Yue's had done the same thing. Whether they loved them or hated them, ultimately, they were Princesses who had given their everything to a cause that had destroyed them. They had become sacrifices, pawns in someone else's game, ready to die if that was what it took to keep their campaigns alive, strong, thriving. If Azula's father had asked her to sacrifice herself fully for him, she would have hated herself for hesitating. She would have hated herself for thinking it wasn't fair. She would have forced herself to go through with it… no matter the cost to her person.

Yue had made the sacrifice by herself, for no one else could do it in her place. Just so, the world had moved on without her, just as it had without Azula. Sokka was the strange, single person who hadn't given up on either of them. Maybe he hadn't cared one bit about Azula until this ordeal had begun… but now, there was a sincerity in his words, his attempts to understand her, that Azula simply couldn't overlook.

But could she be right to suspect the true source of that connection between herself and Yue? Could she be right to believe that Sokka should not look to bond any further with her… for neither she nor Yue were fated for anything but loneliness?

Maybe that was why they were stuck with each other. Maybe they were walking in each other's shoes, in a twisted way. Maybe their only chance at humanity, at reclaiming the possibility of a mundane, simple life, was the tall, kind, humorous and thoughtful man who opened the balloon's basket door for her to step on it, first. Azula nodded in acknowledgement, and he followed her aboard before beginning the work to take to the skies anew.

She might never find peace. Yue most likely wouldn't, either, regardless of her attempts to do so through this strange journey. But if this was the closest either of them would ever get to friendship, companionship, to staving away loneliness and experiencing so many of the blissful things they had been deprived from? Azula intended to take it. She wasn't a good enough person to spare Sokka from the anguish and suffering that would most likely follow after trying to help someone like her, to no avail. She would cling to him, make the most of him… and once she was ready, she'd simply have teach herself how to let go, just like everyone had let go of her, so long ago. Just like everyone but Sokka had let go of Yue.

#sokkla saturdays 2023 #sokklasaturdays #sokkla #sokka #azula #I had never quite written a breakup as messy as the one taking place in this chapter I think #at least not for fics? as far as I recall? #I usually go much more subtly with these things #:'D #but the situation required it (?) #Sokka really needed the moral support going into that mess even if he didn't realize it #even if it's moral support from someone(s) who had zero clue of what was going on #also while I'm absolutely writing Zuko being an ass #I can't help but find him funny in this story #it's just weird how I hardly ever can take him seriously even when he's pulling out death threats and such #I dunno maybe it's just me (?)

[lusty-kopfkino]

Spider-Man Prompt 4 - The Spider in Spider-Man

Spider-Man acts way more like a spider than people think.

*I just love the idea of Spider-Man acting more spidery.

I can see him with all or some: fangs, venom, likes dark places, likes being on walls, real webs, spins webs, kills tiny animals, etc.

I've seen people make Peter friends with spiders, and that's cute and all, but I feel like it doesn't fit with spiders; they are loners. (20 out of 50,000 live in colonies) Peter was bitten by the Araneus Oscorpeus, which is a fictional species. I read somewhere that it is a genus of the orb-weaving spiders. They have venom and make "spiral wheel-shaped webs," so that can be what type of webs he is most likely to make, and these spiders are "beneficial to the ecosystem and help control insect populations." I feel like that fits so well into his character; maybe he not only wants to save people because of Ben but also because of his spider instincts.

*PS I got lots of that info from Google, so if it's wrong blame Google (even if it is wrong, this is fiction anything goes)

I see some people make Peter the same level as other spiders(to develop a connection or something?) They probably don't do it intentionally. It always felt wrong to me; I don't like it(but if I want to read a cute story of Peter being friends with spiders it's okay with me; I'll read it).

Spiders are predators, but they are so small that it isn't that important/scary to us; if you made them human-sized, that would be scary. I imagine it to be a lot like cats and pretty much any of the other feline species. I would pet a cat and want to pet a lion, but no way in hell am I going to even get close to a lion.

So I would like to imagine that any living thing that is smaller than Peter gets an instinctual sense of danger when he is really hungry or fighting someone like Spider-Man. Even humans because spiders have eaten other spiders, so maybe anything smaller or equal in size to him.

Ok so anyway, I saw somewhere that if a forest suddenly goes quiet it means a predator is around, so if Peter goes in one the same thing happens. I would like to think that he is banned from going on any stealth missions that have lots of wildlife; not because he is bad at stealth, quite the opposite in fact, but because it would be too obvious when suddenly all the bugs and birds stop making noise.

He would also have really good scary killing intent(based on scariness) so he is really scary when he is mad. If one day he is in a bad mode, which is rare for him, let's just say the bad guys will be in for a bad time(not because of the beating they will get but because of how scared they will be)

I encourage you to look at more things that spiders have/do so you can add it to Spider-Man's character.

#spiderman #peter parker #fic ideas #fic prompt

[theres-whump-in-that-nebula]

It's been a while since you've posted about Crime and Punishment but do you think Raskolnikov had a point about his theory? Ofc it's not like you can just kill people if you're special, because everyone thinks they're better than everyone else, but it is true that the law isn't always the best way of doing things. What do you think?

Feel free to ignore this ask if you want. I'm re-reading it so thinking about it again.

Hm…

Obviously the law of the land doesn’t always work, and some parts of it are absolute dogshit. And yes, some intelligent people advanced society by killing others.

However! The murder of another should not be done just because one thinks he “has the right” I listen to a lot of true criiiiimmeeeee I listen to it at niiightttt

I like the girl talk viiibes okay I swear I’m done

Raskolnikov — if I remember correctly — largely portrayed intelligence as an inherently positive trait; as indicated by his “genius” or “Napoleon” categorization of intelligent, innovative people. He is the most incorrect person alive for assuming that. Being highly intelligent only means that you have more power than the average person; and the more power one has, greater is the chance that they will misuse it. Necessity is said to be the mother of invention; you are mentally incapable of intentionally inventing a weapon of mass destruction if you’ve never thought you needed a more efficient way to kill people. The only way one would want to work on a more efficient way of killing people is if they identified killing people slowly as a “problem.” This identification of the “problem” and the justification for “solving” it both arise from some high level of critical thinking.

There are two ways of arriving at a wrong solution: one is because you didn’t think critically; the other is because you’ve weaved such a web of mental gymnastics that you’ve begun to see your intricate work as beautiful, and are unwilling to part from it because you’re proud of it, and it makes you feel enlightened. This is precisely what happened to Raskolnikov.

He was very intelligent; but his intelligence caused him to do some stupid things. And he was not ruthless enough to deal with the consequences of his stupid actions, which is why he called himself a “louse.” True stupidity is not a lack of intelligence; true stupidity is the misuse of high intelligence. Raskolnikov was not a louse because he was so hesitant to carry out his murder plot that he fumbled it; Raskolnikov was a louse for doing something that ruined all the credibility he may have had to use his intelligence in a more beneficial way.

The most powerful people with the broadest reach are either extremely intelligent, are aided by those who are extremely intelligent, or were born or bought into a palatial empire created by someone who was extremely intelligent, which is now maintained by their descendants or heirs.

Basically what I’m trying to say is that before attacking a very harmful, powerful figure in any capacity; it is crucial to determine if the prospective victim has any real control over the situation they’re contributing to. If they do, their death will likely have a more positive impact on society than if you kill a figurehead, mouthpiece, or nepotism baby who doesn’t make any real decisions that affect society, and leaves the real brainstorming to someone behind the scenes.

Picture this: A giant octopus is attacking you, and you only have a single harpoon to use against it. It would be very easy to stab that harpoon into one of its tentacles; but if you do that, the octopus can still attack you with its other tentacles because it, and the central body, are intact. Your harpoon is spent and you are eaten because you lost everything you had to defend yourself. In order to incapacitate the entire beast, you should aim for one of its eyes. This way, it will be in too much pain and disorder to continue its attack, and may swim away.

That being said, if you are going to murder someone for the greater good, let the target of your plot be someone with a wide reach and a lord of followers, whose death will scare people into doing the right thing; or at the very least, scare them into being unwilling to continue doing the wrong thing.

The pawnbroker was not that kind of target. Was she an asshole contributing to a lot of suffering and poverty in her area? Yes. But she was not the root cause of the poverty. Even if Raskolnikov had actually distributed her wealth to those who needed it instead of hiding it in a shed, the system of oppression causing such disparity between the rich and the poor would have still been in place, and Rodya still would have been caught and regarded as a deranged killer of pregnant women and little old ladies.

Ideally, Raskolnikov should have murdered a lawmaker who was oppressing the poor through their legislation, and made his motive for doing it clear. But of course, that wouldn’t have been realistic for him to do in his living situation; he was poor himself and had no connections to influential people.

If Raskolnikov were to truly have made a positive impact in the long-term; he simply should have burgled her house in the middle of the night, without killing her or her sister, and donated the money to an orphanage or other charitable group. Even if he were caught and punished for his crime, he would have looked less like a demon-possessed man, and more like a Robin Hood figure. No one wants to imitate an axe murderer unless they’re completely evil and/or out of their fucking mind… but many, many people young and old have fantasized about being Robin Hood and living a life of virtuous crime and danger. This may have garnered respect from others who had similar views, with a higher societal standing than he; because who could get mad at a young, attractive college student for wanting to help the children? 🥺

(Not that being young or attractive makes you more worthy of praise… I’m just saying he should have used his tall, dark, and handsome looks to his advantage because unfortunately much of society is comprised of jerks who only have sympathy for the conventionally-beautiful).

Simply stealing from the rich and giving to the poor, without any murder, would have created an underdog for the news to write about and people to root for— it would have give them a rallying cry, and inspired others to do their own activism.

In short, I think Raskolnikov is partially right— killing a corrupt person in power can be (under certain conditions) a great way to benefit society! But it is more advantageous and beneficial in the long run for everymen to engage in acts of protest, network, and collaborate with each other to achieve greatness and lasting societal impact; rather than simply viewing oneself as a god among men who has a license to step on anyone who gets in their way. Aside from being a painfully-obvious, slow train wreck of an example of the Dunning-Krueger Effect, it’s just an awful, entitled, lonely, way to live— and fascist-adjacent at that!

One point of his I disagree with is that certain people are predisposed to be “extraordinary” or “lice” because they either have the guts to carry through their plans or they don’t. Most people are hardwired to be “lice” because of the psychological phenomenon known as The Bystander Effect— “If we’re in a group and something’s wrong; then someone else will handle it.” If everyone thinks someone else is going to handle it; no one will. That’s just basic human psychology which can be broken with teaching people to assume no one will help unless they do something.

So to answer your question after taking about fifty-seven detours completely unrelated to the topic like a fucking maniac: YES Raskolnikov had a point about the right thing not always being legal; but he limited himself in primarily thinking of murder as the illegal act in question.

#crime and punishment

[jotunkhiicha]

“…Al’Kamakas are a race of celestial beings who place their embryos in stars so that their children may feast and grow strong, risking the collapse of these cosmic bodies just to survive.”

~Professor Elvitania Essentendum on the Celestial Envoys, Al’Kamaka.

Owed To My Jailer.

“Life is not a question of ‘can’ or ‘can’t’; you simply must believe.”

Who had said that to her?

Why does she remember it now, upon the laboratory floor while she lay, lathered in viscous liquid from burst test tubes?

Did it… happen again?

These voices, they blend and mould like kaleidoscope visions; they are akin to whispers in her mind and they chain her down onto this floor.

“…vitania… again…”

It seems familiar, this strange wisp that flutters on the corner of her comprehension.

She can feel the discomfort of the liquid oozing into her clothing and upon her flesh, pressing her down into the metal floor of the ship. She can smell burning flesh but she doesn’t know where it comes from; is it her own flesh or the discombobulated remains of her beloved projects? She can hear footfalls that also reverberate through her being, thundering through the metallic floor and into her bones; vibrating off of the organic structures to induce fear. Her heart yearns for her to open her eyes and look upon the dreaded spectre, come to take her and all her pride.

Will it be an amalgamation of all her creations, of all the creatures inside of Apostate Fissures or will it be her demons given form?

…or is it something else entirely?

“Vita?” A voice calls her familiar nickname.

Is it her beloved goddess?

The temptation is there, lurking and awaiting her to bite upon the bait.

“…Phaixue-Li?” Elvitania mumbles through the webbing of her own inertia.

She hears the thud of something heavy hitting the floor and the clang of something metallic following its master. Then, she hears the clacking of heels against the same metallic floor she lays upon and, this time, she opens her eyes.

She does not see her Goddess.

She does not see her jailer.

She sees—

“Hey, Vita. It’s Nora.”

The Devil.

Elvitania squints at the figure kneeling beside her that plays with the black solution consuming her, deftly weaving her fingers around it, and perhaps playing with it a little too provocatively as she brings it to her lips.

Widening her eyes, Nora hums as she tastes the liquid. “Al’Kamaka essence? Now where did you get one of those, Vita?” She tilts her head and her grey suit is dirtied by the liquid as she kneels beside her, gently brushing the hair out of Elvitania’s face.

“Come now. Don’t be shy. We’re friends.”

Elvitania blinks softly and the desire to resist this spectre comes off her body in droves, like water slipping off of the roof tiles of her childhood home. “Apostate Fissures.”

Nora chuckles approvingly. “My, my. The truth really does live up to the hype. Aren’t you just a crafty little lab rat?”

She, deep inside her soul, wishes to be wrestled free from the Devil’s gaze, but she cannot find it in her to move her muscles.

“…Let me go.” Elvitania manages through gritted teeth and bloodied lips as the liquid seeps into her flesh, down into her muscles and then, before the rapture, into her bones.

Nora sighs and leans ever closer. “I can’t do that, Vita. I made a deal with someone with a lot more power than your will—and I never say no to having a God owe me a favour.”

It dawns upon the scientist that this leaching Devil has come to fulfil a desire, a request and a compulsion. It felt like the gaze of the impure and she wished to cover herself in curtains and roll down hills until no one finds her.

She wishes this were a dream, that this horrific nightmare knew an end and she would awaken somewhere far, far away—

“Elvitania?”

#short story #writing #oc #random story #writers on tumblr #original story #space #cosmos #science #stars #spotify #original character #my characters #Nora #novella

[tjreidwrites]

I used to have a movie review website. I also posted those reviews on Instagram back in 2020. I want to give some of those reviews new life on here. I’ll start with my favorite superhero movie, Spider-Man 2.

SPIDERMAN 2 REVIEW (2004)

Let’s be honest. The first Spider-Man back in the early early 2000’s was a fun time. Maybe a bit overrated though, right? Sam Rami takes what worked in the first installment, and adds amazing story telling, better action, better special effects, and truly realized characters into the fold. This is the first example of the way a superhero movie should be and holds up today. Nothing has been quite like it.

Spider-Man is revealed to be a burden in so many ways to Peter Parker. So much so, that its ruining his life. This movie does everything right when it comes to characters and character development. So many superhero movies before this took so little time with the people behind the mask. I remember even as a kid first viewing this movie, being taken on a emotional roller coaster I wasn't expecting. Peter’s problems become very real to us. The amount of time he spends as Spider-Man forces him to put his actual life on the back burner. This movie is charming, thought provoking, action packed and heart breaking.

Otto Octavius (Alfred Molina) is working on a dangerous experiment. He needs materials only Harry Osborn can provide. His experiment will either prove fusion can work as a cheap source of energy, or destroy all of New York. To handle all the moving parts, Octavius creates four super powered tentacles that are built into his spine and have intelligence of their own. The chip at the head of the contraption is designed to help him keep control of his thoughts. When the chip is destroyed, we welcome Doc Ock.

Peter Parker’s inner battle is easy to become attached to. He can't love Mary Jane, because her life would be threatened 24/7 from Spider-Man’s enemies. We watch as she gives up on Peter, who can't make time for her. Peter has a lot of heart felt moments with Mary Jane as well as Aunt May (Rosemary Harris), who has a lot of screen time. All while Peter has to deal with Harry, who likes Peter but hates Spider-Man with every fiber of his being. We want Peter to just tell Harry the truth about what happened in the first film, but sympathize with him for not knowing how.

FINAL THOUGHTS

Toby Maguire nails this role. Its true. Say what you want about the first film being cartoony, campy, this one Toby shines. In this movie, he is the true Peter Parker. He did everything right. This movie does an immaculate job keeping the dialogue just as interesting as the action. Sure, some sentences are just cheesy enough to remind us that we are watching a movie, but it works. The drama in this movie steals the show every time you watch.

Every character in this movie takes what happened in the first one, and grows as individuals so much. Mary Jane, Harry, Peter, Aunt Mae all have character arcs that pay off massively. Sam Rami nailed the mechanics of Spidey’s web slinging throughout the city. No longer looking cartoony, but instead honing in on the special effects of the time, and looking amazing on the screen.

I’ve watched this movie countless times and know I will watch it even more. The storylines weaving in and out, and the weight of the situation being more real than any superhero film before its time, they knocked this one out of the park. I love this movie and on an overall scale, It has to be the best superhero movie of all time. I think there's an argument to be had on the topic, but there isn't anything wrong with this film.

#book blog #movie review #spiderman #spiderman 2 #marvel #marvel mcu #writing #new writers corner #blog #moviegifs #movie write up #writers on tumblr #filmedit #film #filmisnotdead #superhero movies

[jeanniebug623]

🕸️🕷️ Weaving the Web 🕷️🕸️

Chapter 5: Waking Nightmare

Quaritch stood by the wall, sat on the floor, paced the room...but he did not leave Spider’s room. The boy had fallen asleep easily with two minutes of saying he was tired. Neither of them knew just how tired.

Six hours of watching the kid sleep and dismissing his men when they offered to share the watch, Quaritch heard the quietest groan come the bed he’d leveled out so Spider could sleep as comfortably as possible while still in the four-point restraints. Spider – or should he say Miles – had asked a cryptic question before falling asleep. 

“Will you be here when he wakes up…?” 

Quaritch held his breath as he approached the side of the bed. Who was waking up? 

Spider groaned again, much louder this time as he tried to roll over. Of course, he went nowhere and came to in a dazed panic. He clumsily tried to pull his limbs free and looking around in the dim room franticly. 

“What the hell is going on...?” Spider asked himself, not even aware Quaritch was standing there. 

“Spider?” Quaritch asked, sensing relief when the boy looked in his direction. His bioluminescent design caught Spider’s attention, but he didn’t look any less upset. But at least he’d responded to the name. 

“What the hell is going on?”, he repeated, this time directed at the colonel, “Why am I tied up?!” 

“Just a precaution, kid.” Quaritch said quietly as he moved over to the bedside, crouching down to be on his eye level, “How you feeling, tiger?” 

Spider stared at him like it was obvious how upset he was. But it only lasted a few seconds. He closed his eyes tightly and laid his head back flat. He let out a sigh and his breath shook on the inhale before letting it out again slowly. 

“Spider...?” Quaritch asked, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder. Even though the boy didn’t turn to look at him, he didn’t try to bite him either so the other side of him that went by Miles wasn’t who he was talking to. 

“Ma Eywa...it all fucking happened...” Spider’s managed to tighten his eyelids even more and spoke cracked voice, “...did I hurt anyone? Like...bad?” 

“Nothin’ an ice pack and a few stitches can’t fix.” Quaritch said. He could feel the tiny human frame shaking upon hearing the confirmation that Spider’d attacked someone. Quaritch kept his voice quiet and calming, maintaining contact so he felt something other than padded restraints and a starchy hospital blanket. “Spider...do you know what happened?” 

Spider shrugged awkwardly against the limited movement the wrist cuffs offered and shook his head. His next exhale came out shaky as he suppressed a lot of guilt and overwhelming emotions. He bit his lip hard. Quaritch was afraid it would split when he didn’t speak. 

“Hey...” Quaritch said as he gave the boy’s shoulder a light squeeze, “Trust me, kid, there’s nothin’ you could say that’ll make me walk away right now. But I need to know you’re ok. So I can at least get you out of those cuffs...” 

“I don’t...” Spider said with a tight throat, “I don’t know...it’s, like...?” 

The recom stared at the boy as he struggled to find the words, but he didn’t say a damn thing. He was not going to rush him. Whoever this alternate personality was clearly was NOT someone Spider was proud of. 

“Have you ever...” Spider started, as he opened his eyes narrowly at the ceiling then rolled his head towards Quaritch, “You know, like...when you have a bad dream? And you wake up but you can’t tell if you’re...um...you know, actually awake?” 

Ever since meeting this wild child in the forest, Quaritch had never seen him look anything less than strong and defiant. But now? He looked vulnerable and uncertain. And he didn’t want to insult the kid by thinking that. He nodded thoughtfully at the question. Yes...Quaritch had MANY waking nightmares over his years. 

“You feel like you’re dreaming?” Quaritch asked to clarify. 

“Kind of...?” Spider asked, not sure of himself, “It’s more like when you try to go back to sleep...and you just go right back into the dream. You don’t know if you’re awake...or if you’re in control...” 

Fucking hell... 

“Spider...” Quaritch said, realizing he’d gone rigid and stopped pulling against the restraints when the colonel confirmed he’d acted violently. Like he was too dangerous to let loose. But Quaritch was not afraid. “I’m going to undo these straps, alright?” 

Spider took in a deep breath and let it out. Internal struggle was all over his face. He didn’t want to be tied up but he’d hurt someone. Sure, he’d been fighting against the soldiers who’d dragged him from one cell to another. Jerked away from contact when one of the recoms got too close. But a doctor or nurse or whoever was trying to help him? He’d never attack someone for genuinely trying to help... 

“One at a time, ok? You’ll tell me how you feel.” Quaritch said as he leaned his long arms down to the boy’s ankle furthest from him and undid the tight cuff trapping his leg. “You good?” 

“Yea...” Spider said quietly. He felt the other ankle cuff released and pulled his stiff legs up a bit to bend his knees. 

Quaritch leaned back to his crouching position next to the bed, staring at the kid’s profile before going to remove the wrist cuffs. The boy Miles that he was dealing with earlier had very manic traits. Obsessive eye contact, unpredictable responses, antagonizing verbalizations. The colonel had seen his share of crazy and seen those symptoms before. Spider, on the other hand, looked upset and remorseful for what Miles had done. 

“It’s ok, Spider.” Quaritch said. Making sure to say his chosen name instead of a nickname. 

“It’s not ok...I-I...” Spider bit his lip again, drawing specks of blood from his teeth, “I don’t like it. I don’t like him. He doesn’t...feel right.” 

Quaritch felt a shard chip off his frozen heart. Despite his very feral behavior, this kid had a big heart that didn’t like unnecessary violence. He obviously would fight tooth and nail for those hybrid Sully kids but out of defense. Spider had a good and loyal soul; Miles had an untethered, rageful one. 

“When did you start to notice Miles?” Quaritch asked. Spider looked at him confused so he elaborated, “Seems to be what he wants to go by...” 

Spider rolled his eyes at his own inner demon on the loose but answered to the best of his knowledge, “After the third time...I think.” 

“Third time in the neuroscanner?” Quaritch said with a growl, his ears going back and tail curling. 

“Yea, I think so...” Spider said, closing his eyes again to try and block out that particular waking nightmare. 

“Spider, II was not aware you’d been subjected to that machine other than the times I was there.” the colonel said quickly, trying to temper his anger from his conversation with Ardmore. 

“Does it matter?” Spider asked, opening his eyes to him. And damn it...did the kid look hurt when he asked... 

Quaritch felt an unfamiliar form of guilt that made him shut his trap real fast. No, it probably didn’t. Spider was still a sixteen-year-old boy who just happened to have been raised by the enemy and caught by the RDA. What part of that made such extreme forms of interrogation and mental torture allowable? 

The boy didn’t wait for an answer. Maybe no answer would be good enough. He looked back at the ceiling, his eyes darting around like he was trying to figure out how to deal with his alter ego, who went by a name he tried so hard to erase. His voice was quietly and cracking again when he asked, “What’ll happen to me now...?” 

Despite the still lingering guilt, Quaritch’s ears perked up with determination as he reached across Spider’s body to undo the cuff furthest away then straight to removing the last one. 

“We get you the help you need.” Quaritch said with a determined tone. 

“We?” Spider asked as he let the recom’s strong hands help him sit up. 

“Damn straight, kid.” Quaritch said, keeping a bracing hand on the kid’s back. “Can’t ask for better resources between the medical staff and former Avatar program science pukes on how to get the brain working proper.” 

“What if I can’t be fixed?” Spider asked, nervous of failure and tempting Miles to come out. Part of him wanted to just run away into the forest like he had from day one but deep down? Now he was afraid to...High Camp technology was outdated and Na’vi medicine might not help a human like him... 

“I’m not damaged!” Miles’ tone of Spider’s voice echoed in the back of Quaritch’s mind. 

“Then we figure out how to make it so you control him.” 

#atwow #avatar the way of water #spider quaritch #miles spider socorro #recom quaritch #atwow fanfiction #weaving the web