#i'm not a boy but gender is a construct anyway | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

orkbutch · 4 months

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i am a butch now but i don’t know whether that’s true or not anymore. i want to take T, but at what point am i actually just a trans man? have you question that line in the sand at all yet?

Oh boy.

I can only talk from my perspective on this, others may differ, and thats because "whats the difference between a butch on T and a trans man" is such a new sociological concept that its basically in the very beginnings of its infancy. its SO new, and neither Butch nor Trans Man nor Trans Masc have secure, well established roots as social identities or concepts. It may seem like they do and it may seem like there are rules or lines that are firm, but when you step back, zoom out, and consider them in the context of broader society (and especially compared to the idea of a Man and Woman), they do not. These are social contructs that are actually very early in their construction, and we are doing the constructing like, right now, within this ask.

That said, I can tell you why I don't identify as a trans man fairly easily: I don't care about men or the idea of a man. "Man" as a static concept is like... I don't know what that is. Its almost alien to me.

Now, to ramble that point out:

I have considered if I'm a man throughout my life. The closest I've been to identifying as a man was when I was in a period in my life when I considered that there was at least an aspect of me that was drawn to Manhood. Also, as I came to be read as a man in my public life, i supposed that in social situations when I was being treated as a man and I didn't correct people because I didn't care to, and I even enjoyed it somewhat and leaned into that role, I was essentially Being a Man (socially). So Man came to be a role I found myself in occasionally, and Manhood came to be a vaguely defined something that was intriguing to me.

But these moments of Man Feeling ended up being more like exceptions that proved the rule. Anyone can feel a bit like a man in the right circumstance, because gender isn't static; its something we can and often do play with, and phase through. I feel like music puts me in some heavily gendered spaces, like Everyone has a part of them thats a woman when they're belting along to "I'm Every Woman", yknow. Anyway.

I didn't feel like a man that much. I didn't feel like a woman that much either. I felt like a butch more frequently, because when I do things that indulged my masculinity, when I'm consumed by my love and attraction to femininity, when I think about the queers that I admire most, I felt butch, and was drawn to butches and interesting queer women. Leslie Feinberg, Frida Kahlo, Nancy Grossman, Patricia Highsmith, leather dykes and femme pro-doms, transgender queens... I've just never been that drawn to the experience of being a man. I've never been interested in men, frankly. Every man I've admired has been very much despite being men. Sufjan Stevens, Clive Barker, David Lynch, David Cronenberg, John Waters... great and usually queer artists whose gender is irrelevant because I like their work. The only man in that list who I have some personal affection for is Sufjan Stevens. He is an angel.

If I'm going to be a gender, its going to be the gender I admire. That I aspire to. I don't aspire to any man. Perhaps I aspire to a kind of body or a kind of masculinity, and sometimes men do that, but thats just a lack of other non-man representations of the thing I like. When I see in butches, it feels like a depiction of Me. Also WOW do I So Not feel like a man when I'm with my lovers. Sometimes I feel a bit like a man when I'm in a certain headspace while domming or if I'm having the rare T4T(masc) dalliance, but I feel very dyky when I'm with femmes. I just don't FEEL manhood. And I don't really care for man. Edit: I will say, there is a kind of Queer Man Masculinity that I definitely admire and aspire to, like that depicted by Tom of Finland or various other usually kinky gay art. But again, I don't see the Man part as important - its the masculinity. Btw, imo, there is no line in the sand as far as transition stuff. I'm very dysphoric about my body and that's never been about how I'm seen by others; it's my comfort in my own skin, and doesn't change my indifference to men or manhood. and that is my butch vs trans man ramble

#ask #trans things

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remuslupinslefteyebrow · 22 days

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The Infantilisation of Aziraphale and Why It’s Such An Awful Thing.

Hii there, I'm Teddy and um this is my yap because this is a very close to my heart subject as you probably will be able to tell upon reading. Sorry if theres any repeated points or errors, I did my best to edit it. Anyways, enjoy! <3

The infantilisation of Aziraphale undermines his whole personality as an age old being, one who is incredibly powerful, strong, and intelligent. Far from infantile, he's made rational decisions and at times let his emotions influence them, yes, but this is no way an excuse to chalk him down to childish. Infantilising Aziraphale also jeopardises his relationship with Crowley, someone just as old and intelligent as he is, yet he is rarely infantilised. Although Aziraphale’s decisions may be more ‘pure’ than Crowley's, influenced by his ideas of rules and obligation, pushed on him from his very creation, they don't display naivety or the foolishness depicted in many infantile decisions. (for the most part)

People often infantilise him to purposefully further the effeminate, ‘cutesy’ stereotype of gay men, specifically gay men that don't necessarily conform to society's very strict beauty constructs whether it be through age, appearance, nationality, disabilities all these things can affect it.

A lot of gay men face either infantilisation or hypersexualisation and the way some of the good omens fandom treats Crowley and Aziraphale is exactly this stereotype.

They strip down the personalities of crowley and Aziraphale to something that may be only a small fraction of their personality, like Aziraphale’s softness being turned into this shy, mouse of a person, relying on crowley for everything, helpless, pathetic, crowley’s sometimes suave, cool manner turning him into a ice-cold, smooth-talking often masochistic alpha male fucking sex god. Neither of them are these things.

The fandom also tends to deliberately remove Crowley's femininity which historically has been a large part of his character, just look at his portrayals throughout the years. Like why? All for the sake of some Colleen Hoover style fuck boy?? Hell to the fucking no.

They often turn Crowley into a total slut as well, mindless and perpetually horny, neither of those things is he, especially not mindless. He’s proven himself to be clever, cunning and wily, as per his demonic heritage, but tends to do things a little…. Undemonically.

Oh well.

Aziraphale’s femininity, his softness and joy, his purity isn't an excuse to reduce him down to singularly those things. He is a well rounded character, with so many layers of personality and history and all these things that if you take away these elements it's no longer Aziraphale. It might as well be someone’s random OC. (well technically he’s Neil Gayma- ahem i mean Gaiman’s oc but yk elementary, my dear Watson)

The points people tend to zone in on in their quest to baby their dear sweet Aziraphale who ‘must be protected at all costs’ are usually these:

His innocence, particularly about human culture (though admittedly he knows more about certain things than even crowley does)

His love of soft, sweet things

His emotional dependence on crowley

is reluctance to rebel against authority

His politeness

People forget Aziraphale is completely capable of defending and taking care of himself. He’s not your ‘uwu soft boy’ who needs to be looked after. No, he’s far from that. The whole ‘infantilisation thing’ is also just an excuse to dumb down and baby gender-nonconforming people which in itself is atrocious. As my very good co-writer Kris said, he’s “the angel of the fucking eastern gate for crying out loud.” He wields a flaming sword, can produce strong miracles and can resist temptation. Oh, did I mention he also helped avert a whole FUCKING APOCALYPSE??? AS IN. END OF THE WORLD. FIRE AND BRIMSTONE. OH NO, BOOHOO, WE’RE ALL GONNA DIE TYPE APOCALYPSE?????????? HMM?

HIS KINDNESS IS ALSO WORTH NOTING.

He's also proven himself to be perfectly capable of making his own decisions with his own mind, has proven himself to have a conscience, a strong sense of right and wrong that he formed partly alone, sometimes deviating from heavens set ‘code’ for beliefs and behaviour, has proven himself to be able to deal with the guilt and confusing emotions (to a certain degree) that come alongside with finding yourself deeply involved with someone that you know the very institution that created you despises.

Aziraphale’s sense of fashion and general propriety also furthers the ‘effeminate’ stereotype, making him seem overly vain and prudish, he can be these things, he can sometimes even be petulant, but this further proves his well rounded character as being shown to display a wide range of emotions.

Using direct quotes from the book here are some lines people may use to zone in on Aziraphale’s femininity, and then of course, you find another reason for his infantilisation. (Women are dumbed down and infantilised, OBVIOUSLY.)

Aziraphales effeminate qualities:

“Aziraphale spread his elegantly-manicured hands.”

“Tartan is stylish.”

“Angels had certain moral standards to maintain and so, unlike Crowley, he preferred to buy his clothes rather than wish them into being from raw firmament. And the shirt had been quite expensive.”

“Many people, meeting Aziraphale for the first time, formed three impressions: that he was English, that he was intelligent, and that he was gayer than a tree full of monkeys on nitrous oxide.”

Aziraphale has also been shown to be able to be thoughtless, careless and at times even selfish.

In season one, a dove used for magic dies in his coat pocket due to his thoughtlessness, though he ressurects it soon after its discovery.

I ALSO FUCKING FUCKING FUCKING DESPISE WHEN PEOPLE TWINKIFY AZIRAPHALE.

LIKE.

WHY.

His appearance goes hand in hand with his character. It HIGHLIGHTS elements of his character. He’s gluttonous. A quality we shouldn’t really see in an angel, but regardless we do. Because of this quality, he's plump. And? This doesn't affect his personality or character and is in fact still essential to it.

His vanity affects his appearance greatly. He’s said to have soft hands, ‘neatly manicured’. He typically doesn’t grow facial hair, opting for a clean shaven rather cherubic appearance. We know he greatly prides himself on his clothes, keeping them in pristine condition for hundreds of years, taking painstaking care with them. We see him greatly disappointed in season one when his jacket is shot by a paintball and he’s reluctant to wash or even magically remove it because he’ll ‘still know it’s there’, so in the end Crowley removes it for him, after which Aziraphale seems quite satisfied. He doesn’t mention about ‘knowing it’s still there’. Gay much.

We keep seeing qualities in Aziraphale that aren’t usually typical or desirable in an angel, adding more layers to his character and personality. If he didn’t have these things, he’d be like any other angel we see.

These angels aren’t necessarily cruel, or callous, or mean. They have no concept of such things. They simply follow orders to the extent they do not question or care what the thing is they’re being ordered to do. They don’t have an internal moral battle over whether this is right or wrong. They don’t believe that their actions could possibly be wrong or misguided because they literally take God at his every word. Get an order, complete it. Simple as that.

It’s because of the traits he’s developed by himself over time that make him so likeable. Do you honestly think he’d be popular at all without these things? Then how can he be stripped of these things so frequently people are starting to forget his original character completely? It’s such a shame.

In fact he really isn’t a very good angel at all. He’s far too human. But you see, that’s what makes him so powerful. He does have a conscience. It influences him. He has a sense of right and wrong. He rebels, because he thinks. He thinks and therefore he decides things are wrong. And he decides not to obey those things.

Off topic as I round my points up:

In reference to the appearance quirks of the angels, someone in a reddit post three years ago (user has been deleted) put it wonderfully:

“I believe that the gold make-up and highlights on Uriel and Michael’s face, Sandalphon’s diamond-studded grill with a crucifix, and Gabriel’s violet eyes were design choices to communicate their ethereal natures to the audience.

The way they did this with Aziraphale are his white outfits, gold angel themed jewellery, the cherubic curls, but most of all, his halo. The director put a lot of effort into always backlighting Aziraphale’s blond hair to give the appearance of a halo, as well as placing him in well lit areas. The result is that Aziraphale practically glows in every scene he’s in. Michael Sheen put a ton of light into Aziraphale’s smile as well, in a way probably no other actor could have done.

If we’re going to settle on something as an ethereal quirk for Aziraphale, it’s his radiance.”

Anyways, thank you so much for reading this giant yap, I’m very honoured.

anyways gang this is the other half of this post written by my very good friend, Kris. ( @anth0ny-c0wl3yy )

Enjoy! <3

#aziracrow #aziraphale #azirafell #good omens 2 #ineffable husbands #ineffable fandom #anthony j crowley #neil gaiman #professional yapper

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youngpeachenthusiast · 25 days

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this is going to be a post about my experience with my gender identity and there's definitely going to be some (a lot of) oversharing so uh... more under the cut??

sometimes i find myself reflecting on how my identity came to be, and the more i think about it, the more i think my mom is very wrong when she says there were "absolutely no signs".

while throughout my childhood i did present very femininely, i remember that ever since i was a little boy i secretly was convinced that one day i would literally just grow a penis. i understood that there was some kind of difference between the genitalia of boys and my own, but i thought it was simply a matter of time and my very own penis would grow in its own time. i started puberty very early on and when my clitoris started enlarging i thought "this is it, it's finally happening".

needless to say it didn't happen. and when a few months later we got our very first sex ed and i learned that i was inevitably going to become a young lady, well... i was devastated. i remember crying on multiple occasions to my mother because i desperately didn't want to go through puberty. having real proper panic attacks about it. i remember the first time a friend commented on my breasts coming in. i remember trying to bind with a headband only to be caught and punished by my mother. i remember getting my first period and doing everything in my power to hide it from her, because as long as she didn't know i could still close my eyes and cover my ears and pray that it would just go away.

even not taking the relationship with my body into account, i was changing my name multiple times a month because mine didn't fit, and i just couldn't figure out what was going on.

all of this long before i even knew that something such as being transgender existed.

i was 13 when i first met a transgender person. as soon as i saw them and i learned who they were, i knew the answer. that was me. that had always been me, indubitably.

it took some time before i actually accepted that in no way i could ever stay alive and be a woman at the same time. when i finally did, that's when my life started getting better. years and years of self hatred found their answer in something so trivial as being a man.

so i think of my mother, who argues that "there were no signs" and still refuses to refer to me by my name and pronouns because she's convinced i'll change my mind (after five years of very much not changing my mind), and i do not know how to feel.

there were so, so many signs. i'm not sure i would even call them signs, it was just me existing after all.

and sure, early signs don't matter and i can still be trans even if nothing pointed to it in the slightest in the past. but also. the signs were there, and i'm very tired of pretending they were not.

i don't know why i'm here posting about all of this. discussing my early view of genitalia and all. i suppose i'm just looking for someone like me, who will make me feel less alone. the "girly girl" who always kept so much of his discomfort to himself.

i am honestly amazed that human beings can experience this kind of feelings over their body and social constructs and... everything, really. it does hurt like hell, sure. but it is incredible how deep of an experience i can have with something as simple as an organ of my body.

anyway. thanks for reading my oversharing. or whatever. goodnight!

#elliot talks #transgender man #transgender #trans man #trans people #gender identity #gender dysphoria #dysphoria #queer #queerness #lgbt #lgbtq #lgbtqia #lgbtq community #lgbtqia community #transblr #trans

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aberrant-angel · 24 days

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can i ask you to elaborate on what being ageless means? to you? i think it's really interesting (and i don't want to rely on google info i think it will be wrong) (i'm a little this is very genuine)

thank you for the question!

i think age shares a lot of similarities with gender/sex, which is something you'll get absolutely dogpiled for saying in the wrong company, but it's true. people mistakenly conflate chronological measurements of how much time has passed since you were born with the role you're expected to fulfill based on your perceived age, how you're supposed to talk, how you're supposed to dress, how people will expect your mind to work, etc. just like you are assigned a gender you are expected to perform, you are also expected to behaviourally and aesthetically perform your age as a role.

also just like with biological sex there's a bunch of weird essentialist pseudoscience surrounding age, for example the pervasive myth of "brain development" (often used as a justification for denying rights to younger people) like how people will claim your brain isn't fully finished until you're 25. it's all nonsense and has been repeatedly disproven.

for me, i don't really feel like i fit in with "adults", i don't really feel like i fit in with "kids", i don't feel "old" or "young" consistently, i don't feel like i slot neatly into anywhere on the range of ages you're supposed to be. i'm "mature" about some things and "childish" about others. sometimes i feel younger, sometimes i feel older, often i don't feel like any age at all and more like some kind of creature detached from human ideas of age. like, it's funny to call an animal "little boy" or "old woman" or that kind of thing, right? because there's an absurdity to it, because of course animals don't have a concept of age like that, just like they don't have a concept of gender in the way humans do either. it's largely a social construct, even if people are uncomfortable openly acknowledging that.

how i feel about my age all depends on context and my mental state. i've heard other people express similar sentiments to me, although they're usually scared to explicitly use a label like "ageless" (or "transage" or "chronosian" or any similar terms,) but neurodivergency, dissociative conditions, plurality, and trauma, (among other things,) seems to often play a role in it. the main thing that actually separates people by age is how much experience they have had the possibility to collect over the course of their life, but i don't even remember most of mine. did i ever really "grow up" in a normal way then? it's complicated. (kind of a tangent but people casually use phrases like "growing up too fast" or having "childlike development" etc. in a psychological context but then suddenly when someone acknowledges such things as a genuine part of their own experience, it's looked down on. very interesting!)

think about it like this: would people that don't know my age treat me differently if they knew i was 17? or if they knew i just lied in the previous sentence and i'm actually 25? or if it was revealed that all of these are wrong and my real age is 50? should it matter? i'm still the same person regardless. i just don't want to be constrained by other people's perceptions on me. like if someone treats me like an equal, or exposes me to "mature" topics, or thinks of me as knowledgeable, or any of these other things people do that are often based on a person's perceived age, that should actually be based on who i really am as a person and not something as abstracted as how many times the earth has rotated around the sun since i was born. (people make fun of astrology but still believe in age as a real thing lmao)

sorry for this massive half-coherent ramble but i have a lot of thoughts about it that i've never really sat down and laid out like this, i'm sure by the time i hit "post" on this i'll have thought of even more to add... anyway to anyone who says "you just don't want to identify with your age because you want to abuse kids" i'll say they sound exactly like the same people who tell me the reason i don't identify with my assigned gender is because i want to assault women in female-only spaces. i shouldn't have to defend my identity from bad-faith interpretations of it. (not that you're doing that anon, you were very nice and respectful, but i know some people will read all this and think that way) (also funny of them to automatically assume i'm not chronologically a "kid" lol. some people who experience age differently are legally minors)

#asks

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rollercoasterwords · 2 months

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Hey so I just finished reading James’ interlude (it was amazing by the way!) and the u portrayed his aromanticism was so fascinating, def one of my portrayals. I saw u answering an anon and u mentioned (correct me if I’m wrong) that his aromanticism kinda comes from him being the chosen one, and how stuff like gender and sexuality are socially constructed. This is such an interesting concept to me coz I hear that language getting thrown around a lot but I never really understood what it meant.

It kinda reminded me of a convo I had with my transmasc friend. He said that if he had been born a boy he probably would have been transfem. At first I was pretty surprised, but then I thought abt it and realised that despite being a lesbian, if I had been born a boy I probably would have been gay. This revelation really stumped me coz, for context, Income from a conservative religious background, so I’ve always latched onto the idea that being gay is smth innate, or how God made me. But after that revelation,, I was like,,, maybe I can be straight if I try hard enough?? Liking girls is not smth innate within me?? Idk.

Sorry for the rambling lol but reading ur works always gets me thinking deeper abt these kind of topics. Probs has smth to do with u studying gender studies lol.

Anyways love ur work and have a good day <33

yeah i mean. i def think it's a good idea 4 everyone 2 spend time pondering & developing their own understanding of gender; ik mine has changed significantly over the course of my life & likely will continue 2 change as i grow older & learn more, etc.

i think one thing people tend 2 get stuck on is this idea that either ur born w ur identity (whether that's gender, sexuality, etc) baked in & have 2 discover it throughout ur life (bound up in the post-Enlightenment idea of a disembodied 'soul' or 'mind') OR it's all socially constructed, so it's completely made up/shaped by outside forces and we're all just playing pretend, etc. but that's really not what i mean when i say that i think of gender (& sexuality, etc) as socially constructed.

the best metaphor i have rn 4 explaining my own worldview is the idea of an accent. obviously, there is a material component to someone's accent: the shape of their mouth, their teeth--their ears, their hearing, etc. all of these physical & material factors influence how someone's accent might develop. but none of those factors really matter until placed within a social context--depending on where & how ur raised, ur accent will vary wildly, and it won't necessarily remain static throughout the course of your life. you & your family might have different accents; you might use a different accent to speak another language; your physical body might change in some way that affects your accent and the way u speak (stroke, hearing loss, etc). but there's no single, "true" accent inside of you waiting 2 be discovered and spoken. it's a socially constructed part of ur identity that develops throughout ur life, and can only be understood & have meaning attributed to it in a social context. and once u develop an accent, it feels as natural & as much a part of u as something like hair color, etc--it's not something u can just snap ur fingers & change, despite the fact that u weren't "born that way."

obviously, this is a metaphor, and there r many ways gender identity differs from accents--but i find it useful 4 helping illustrate in a tangible way what i'm talking abt when i say something is a "social construction." w james in wfrau specifically, what i was trying 2 say in that ask was not, again, that being "the chosen one" made him aromantic; rather, what i'm hoping 2 convey is that his experience growing up as "the chosen one" has fundamentally shaped his own understanding of his inability to experience/confusion surrounding romantic love (this is also why i avoid concretely labeling him as aromantic in the tags on the fic; it's not necessarily how he understands himself). he attributes this part of his identity to his understanding of himself as a "hero," i.e. someone who is not meant 2 prioritize any one person above The Cause/The Quest, bc his inability to grasp this concept of romantic love & reciprocate it does not align w normative understandings of love & so makes him feel ashamed & isolated & as though there's something "wrong" with him, & attributing this "broken" aspect of himself 2 the fact that he's meant 2 be a "hero" helps him reconcile w this piece of his identity that he otherwise doesn't understand how 2 qualify. again, i'm less concerned w whether there's some inherent "aromanticism" baked into him or whether he'd feel the same/identify the same way in different circumstances; what i'm interested in is looking at how this specific character has been shaped by these specific circumstances. hope that makes sense lol also ty glad ur enjoying the fic!

#ask #wfrau #ranting and raving #<- just since this got kinda long

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metamatar · 9 months

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need your thoughts on csm and particularly part 1 now that you're caught up

I think my immediate reaction on finishing part 1 was like

loved the art, loved the characters def feel like the story has a lot further to go thematically, only really picked up for me with the reveal of the gun devil

I now think CSM's strength in the early arcs is the patience of the construction of Denji as an everyman resisting the reality that the promised capitalist horizon he imagines is a lie.

now that you can tell the horrible direction my thoughts are going in I will continue under the cut, this is so long oh god. cw: canon typical violence, sexual assault etc.

Initially the repeated invocation of wanting to kiss a girl and eat a good meal as ultimate dreams and Denji being presented as an idiot for it felt like a cheap way for readers to get to root for him in a very Naruto sort of way yk? Poor orphan boy wants a basic life. This is disrupted right from the start ofc, starting with the Himeno's assault and Makima's whole deal. I think this construction becomes more valuable in part 2 when with Nayuta there is a very intentional attempt to construct a family, where the horizon is a normality that includes saving up for college. Nayuta's resistance to some of it becomes more interesting than just jealousy or protection imo.

I think the complications of the "workplace" as it functions for Denji in part 1, living quite literally under Aki's supervision with Power invokes the very familiar team as family stuff under threat. The explicit knowledge of how he has exchanged one debtor for another is v effective especially when they take care of Power. You have him and the readers being forced to confront that purpotedly transactional relationships do not exclude the sort for the simple honesty of care we idealise. And that the care will be weaponised anyway. Aki's abortive attempt to opt out is chef's kiss.

The reveal of the use of the gun devil by nation states might functionally be the first moment Denji is forced to acknowledge the complicated incentives of the Bureau. You get to link the exploitation of people to the more obvious rot in liberal institutions. Part 2 then ratchets this up with the discourses on propaganda and mass participation.

I thought the "Killing of Makima" involving the use of the Bureau insiders led by the old man leaned a little too much on their heroism, vibes wise but I also get why narratively that needs to be done. Which is why Kobeni is so important to me lol. The art and creativity on display at the end of Part 1 was like gorging yourself on one of those early pictures of Paradise. The apartment scene could get read as Makima's personal cruelty but I think it's just making explicit the cruel seductions of modernity etc etc. As a violation of Denji esp. it is almost complete, structurally taking the form of kink and the parody of care after. Mwah.

With that, the reconciliation of Denji's past and present when his past in debt bondage is also constructed with the societal complicity about domestic violence becomes delicious. Nayuta is reborn out of a cannibalism not really done in the service of personal survival and def not out of a commitment to self sacrificing heroism.

I'm excited for Part 2, Asa esp lets you get at some of the same neuroses Denji has as a teenager but from a gendered perspective. Her relationship with Yuko is some of the strongest bit of writing about bullying and justice I have read in a while. I've enjoyed the lead up to Fami and War's apocalypse so far, but their motivations are still a little inscrutable and fallback on devils, wyd? despite their sisterhood. I think Fujimoto's focus seems to be the public discourses around devils in this arc, so thats probably why it feels like that but I'm personally always interested in all of it.

#chainsaw man #meta #asks #idt these are like original thoughts but i actually have no idea where to read meta on these lines so this could be much more sharper #if it was in conversation with other people #oh my god i saw a textpost in the csm tag that went debt is exploitative but inevitable in a functioning society

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glbtrx · 7 months

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recognize that not everyone cares about their gender. Not everyone feel the need to find the perfect term that describes them. Sometimes you just accept that binary gender is a social construct, build by people for UTILITY, sometimes you just genuinely say "eh, I'm not feeling a girl nor a guy, but I've born with this body so who cares. it won't change me." sometimes you don't care (or you don't know and don't care to know) and it's ok; because sometimes anyway you won't let the gender society attributes to your body to affect your behaviour and personality. and sometimes you have to come to deals with people. sometimes they'll say "you're a boy, you're a girl" and even if that's just your body, you'll settle. and it's okay. sometimes they'll say "you're non-binary, you're trans, you're agender, you're cis". All right, if you think so. But honestly I'm me. that's all I care about. Give me a girl body, a male body or a neutral body, I don't need it, I don't need to know. and accepting that it's not laziness or submission. sometimes, all you need to know is that you're a human and you're alive.

#gender #lgbtq #agender #non binary #trans #rambling #glbtrx

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cypriathus · 9 months

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For those who stumble upon my account... Hello and how are ya? This is my very first time using Tumblr! You can refer to me as Banana Cat, Yume, Dreamy, Floof or JJ. I'm a genuinely curious individual who sometimes gets obsessed with stuff that I eventually want to get engaged with or stuff that I have no intention of trying out, but I'm very fascinated by it. I'm also just a silly, creative Canadian who's trying to get the most out of life.

My general pronouns are she/her, but I genuinely don't mind you referring to me as they/them and he/him. I will not specify my age publicly due to privacy reasons. If you want to know, just shoot me a DM/message.

Some of my hobbies include writing, drawing, listening to music, reading novels and manga, watching YouTube, occasionally watching movies, TV shows or anime, and baking once in a blue moon. For those wondering what kind of art I do, I've primarily been doing a lot of digital artwork as of now. However, I have been using traditional mediums (acrylic paint, markers, coloured pencils, and regular ol' pencils) for many years now. You can find most of my current artworks that I have shared on my Instagram account (@cypriathus). Before we move on with other stuff about me, some of my interests include psychology, sociology, criminology, law, biology, outer space, mythology, folklore, legends, religion, history, internet mysteries, and lost media.

I listen to a myriad of music artists including:

Muse

Evanescence

Set It Off

The Raven Age

My Chemical Romance

Citizen Soldier

Clarence Clarity

Fall Out Boy

Finger Eleven

Get Scared

Avenged Sevenfold

Infected Musroom and so much more

I have watched a lot of anime and there are still some I need to get around to watching eventually. Some of these anime include:

Cat Soup

Ergo Proxy

FLCL

Perfect Blue

Tokyo Godfathers

Neon Genesis Evangelion

Kaiba

Haibane Renmei

Outlaw Star

Now and Then, Here and There

Serial Experiments Lain

Summer Wars

Belle

Angel's Egg

Most Studio Ghibli movies

Cowboy Bebop

Metropolis

Steamboy

The Tatami Galaxy

Mind Game

Maquia: When the Promised Flower Blooms

Devilman Crybaby

Mononoke and so much more

Non-anine movies and TV shows that I remember watching:

Breaking Bad franchise

Seven

American History X

Coraline

ParaNorman

Mad God

Schindler's List

Final Space

Cliffhanger

Del Toro's Pinocchio

Tetsuo: The Iron Man

Possum

The Mask

The Wedding Singer

Labyrinth

The Dark Crystal

Midsommar

Hereditary

Scarface

Monty Python and the Holy Grail & Monty Python's Life of Brian

Silence of the Lambs

Popee the Performer

Mr. Stain on Junk Alley

And many more

Some manga and books that I have currently read are:

Homunculus

Chainsaw Man

AKIRA

The Girl from the Other Side: Siúil, a Rún

The Ancient Magus' Bride

Dandadan

Trigun and Trigun Maximum

Bibliomania

Heads

Goodbye, Eri

Look Back

Yogen no Nayuta

Eden: It’s An Endless World

Keyman: The Hand of Judgement

Shigahime

Rojica to Rakkasei

BLAME!

Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind

Animal Farm

The Green Mile

Salem's Lot

Lord of the Flies

The Catcher in the Rye

To Kill a Mockingbird

The Complete Tales of H. P. Lovecraft and more

Do not interact with me if you're one of the following:

Pedophile

Anti-LGBTQ+

Racist

Sexist/misogynistic

Ageist

Ableist

Someone who invalidates a person's pronouns, gender, and/or identity

Someone who supports, participates, tolerates, and/or justifies any of the above.

That's most of the stuff you need to know about me as of now. Anyways, as I mentioned in the description, I plan on using this blog as a way to share various ideas in regards to my own little multiverse. I'm open to listening to your ideas, sharing new ideas, and even constructive criticism! I hope you enjoy your stay here and I can't wait to share my ideas with y'all!

I have a side blog where I roleplay, make moodboards, and post stuff that ain't related to my work: @floofgryph

Links:

Writing request rules

Story plots and major worldbuilding

Main protagonists

Deities

Infernal beings

Angels (TBA)

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gender-trash · 5 months

Note

I had to go to a department seminar today for a requirement and the talk was 'Modeling, Estimation, and Control of Quadrupedal and Humanoid Robot Locomotion in Non-Inertial Environments' and it was interesting but I kept thinking 'darn, I bet gender-trash would love this' It was essentially, hey can we get a robot to walk in a straight line while on a rocking ship?' and the answer was 'lol. sorta kinda' anyhow I hope you have a nice evening :)

:0 this is really cool!! i looked up the person giving the seminar (yan gu) and found this video linked from one of the papers she coauthored:

youtube

(n.b. that i just skimmed this paper and am definitely not bothering to work through all the math, but) the key assumptions this makes are that 1) the robot can perceive or otherwise know the movement of the surface relative to itself (in the lab they use fiducials stuck to the treadmill, and hint vaguely in the paper that integrating sensor data from the ship or whatever would be plausible in a real-world deployment, which -- PERSONALLY i am much less confident about, as someone who has been socially adjacent to industry work on robot integration with elevator controllers, but whatever, it's research, i'm willing to cut them slack on that) and 2) the walking surface is planar (for the biped the surface position is determined from forward kinematics assuming the robot's feet always make full contact with the surface when it does a steppy; i read the quadruped paper much less thoroughly but given how careful they were to select a gait that always has three feet in contact with the ground i'm assuming the same condition holds).

DEFINITELY a big improvement over "let's assume the floor does not move :)" control, and i don't mean to be critical here, i think it's perfectly fair for a controls paper to leave the software integration/perception challenges up to Future Work to figure out! this is just how i personally analyze robotics research -- there's always a bunch of assumptions involved to make a robot problem tractable, some of them more realistic than others, so the most important thing i want to understand about a new research thing is what assumptions they're making. (for example, a lot of navigation research assumes no sane person would design or construct a building like the stata center...)

(also, really makes you appreciate how average humans can walk on wildly pitching ships with zero perception, just pure IMU, surface contact sensing, and proprioception/kinematics. take a moment to be grateful for your cerebellum :p)

anyway -- thanks for the pointer, i always love seeing awesome new controls-y stuff! anon, i assume you know most of this stuff already, but for followers interested in learning more about controls for leggy bois, i always recommend russ tedrake's underactuated robotics class -- he has his very well-written lecture notes and several years worth of lecture videos all available online. thanks prof tedrake i love you <3

#the trashcan speaks #6.832blogging #they fucking renumbered everything but you know what i mean #professional robot torturer

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inklessletter · 11 months

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I was going through Pinterest, saving pictures of Steve as references for future drawings, and although I noticed the vast difference in the style and aesthetics of the character from s3 to s4, I have just realized that what the makeup and characterization department did on Steve is the most astonishing Mulan effect.

Beyond the sailor outfit, that it is itself an almost childish element, Steve in s3 is all soft edges, and baby highlights, and long lashes, and pouty lips; whereas in s4 the clothing, the camera angles tend to emphasize other elements, like his jaw, or the obvious mention to the chest hair, again with the tight jeans, or his arms... and so on.

It is the very same effect when Disney animators had to depict Mulan as a girl, or they had to depict them as a man (and yes, I know, I'm deliberately avoiding words as masculine and feminine because those constructs are based on traditional gender roles that I don't believe in), they did it by drawing them with all soft edges, pouty lips, round face, and when they identified as Ping, suddenly grew a jaw, and their lips were a lot smaller.

The Mulan effect is real in Steve Harrington, that boy slay.

(Gifs for visual support)

Yes, I've picked similar gifs and the difference is huge.

He's still a babygirl to me anyways but seriously, kudos to the whole makeup and characterization department in the show, they did amazing (and to Joe Keery himself, he's a great actor, and such a dream)

#stranger things #steve harrington #disney #mulan #the mulan effect #joe keery #characterization #god he's a beautiful man

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sherifftillman · 8 months

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thanks to @pollenallergie i haven't stopped thinking about older!tom grant for days now, and while any fics i could write about him need to be put on the backburner for now (there's one that's been in the pipeline for a While now), here's some headcanons of my interpretation of what lil tommy g is like as an adult:

(under the cut bc long)

(also as i'm writing this i may or may not be planning fics that happen at each stage of the timeline)

(also x2 before any of u weirdos start hopping into my ask box, this is in no way trying to overshadow cassie's version of him, i'm just throwing my own ideas into the void. i love cassie's tom, and then in a separate universe, i can have my tom, too. also he's p much every guy i've ever pulled except he's way more romantic than any of my exes, so this is more self-catharsis than anything else LMAO)

okay so tom's timeline post-canon:

after his lil summer gigs at the caravan park, he moved back up north to derby and got a job at a construction company that's owned by an old family friend, like his dad's childhood best friend. it was always a given, even when he wanted to pursue a life living down in cornwall, he just couldn't stop associating the whole place with ruth and heartbreak and all manner of things that weighed heavy on his heart. and fuck that, right? he's got his whole life ahead of him!

he spends his first few years as a legal adult the way all british lads do - by spending at least two nights a week at some kind of pub, bar or nightclub. he can pull, of course, but the convenience of still living with his parents gives him an excuse to put off going any further with anyone. cassie's anon who suggested bi tom, i'm kissing you so hard on your forehead rn bc he'd literally spend like almost a year being just shy of his Hoe Phase, making out with anyone who wants to, regardless of their gender, but only while he's at the club, he never lets himself go further.

until that one night when his parents are away and his mates know full well that he's got no excuse and they're very obviously egging him on. (this would probably be the first fic in the series)

he moves out from his parents' place into a flat with a friend he's made outside of work, and that's when his lil slut era truly begins. (maybe a series of blurbs for this?) he lives with a friend he's made outside of work (any gender, it's not relevant bc bi!tom and his flatmate are 100% Best Buds For Life but also if neither of them find anyone worth pulling on a night out, they'll go back to the flat and fool around together anyway)

in his working life, tom absolutely thrives at the construction company. mostly bc he's known the workers his whole life, so he can have plenty of banter with them, but also, more importantly, he knows just enough IT skills to be able to help the owner with digitalising all the admin stuff. this means tom rises the ranks to supervisor pretty quickly, and everyone loves little Boy Wonder himself. he hates being in the office though, he's always out on site wherever the company's got jobs going. he's hands-on, he wants to help, he doesn't want to be a Big Boss Type

okay, from now on, this is the part in tom's life where he meets you, the person who ends up as his endgame. so this is a different character to those i might write about in his hoe phase, probably time skip a few years of tom taking a break from slutting it up and just casually dating until he knows exactly what he wants to give and take from a relationship.

and then he meets you. it's summer, and your work bestie has invited you over to her place to meet her boyfriend and her non-work friends for the first time. you're a little nervous, but you remember that she has a dog, so if all else fails, you can just go full Party Dog mode and switch everyone else off

it's not that you don't like her friends from outside of work, you just have way less in common with them than you do her, and it feels awkward trying to put yourself in conversations without her there, and she's all over this new fella of hers, so you go to your failsafe to find that someone else has had the same idea as you

tom's come along as support for his best friend, who's dating your work bestie. however, since the boyfriend is being walked like a dog around the whole party being introduced to everybody, tom isn't as sociable and was promised there'd be a Party Dog there, so he's gone looking, himself.

you guys bond v quickly over being Party Dog People, spending the night narrating different groups as though you're david attenborough and taking it in turns to let the dog comment in silly voices you both make up for it

stupidly, you don't get his number, or even his last name. one thing you'd learned about him is that he doesn't really use social media, which you can tell from the instagram account you find from several hours of snooping lightly browsing, which was last updated when he'd gone on a lads' holiday to ibiza several years ago, and only features group shots in which he's tiny and his face is mostly obscured with sunglasses. which means you've got to try and convince your work bestie to invite you somewhere that her boyfriend's friends are gonna be, too

thankfully, this is nice n easy, bc tom's been planning the exact same on his end. you guys get so lost in conversation all night that you almost forget to ask for his number, until you're rolling down the window in the back of the Uber you've ordered and he's hanging halfway through it to make sure he studies the screen so that he can make sure that everything he thinks he's saying matches up with what he actually is

the Uber driver gets a little peeved about this and is like "listen mate just get in so i can drive off" and tom sheepishly complies, ending up riding all the way home with you. you'd feel rude if you didn't invite him in, though a little part of you is sad that tom's just probably gonna be another one night stand bc you really liked him. you get another drink for the two of you once you're inside, he suggests the two of you watch something for a bit for some background noise. naturally, you cuddle up, and that leads to kissing - a lot of kissing. but he doesn't try it on any further. you both end up falling asleep on the couch until you wake up to the sight, sound n smell of him making himself home in your kitchen, cooking you breakfast

you guys have this sort of, slightly more than friends, not exactly friends with benefits, relationship that he isn't out here jumping the gun trying to define, so neither are you. you're trying to stay casual with it, to keep up with him, even though your work bestie keeps pushing you for more bc she doesn't believe that that's just what you guys are, but she's not making any hints that tom's suggested taking things further, and so neither will you. (would it be an rj fic if there wasn't a comedy of errors thanks to basic miscommunication? lol)

either a significant amount of months pass, or valentine's day approaches, and tom gets you a gift. it's not any big grand gesture, but it's something that v much pertains to something you really love. a hobby, an interest, some silly little objectification of an inside joke) you feel bad, of course, and he insists that he's just a gift giver by nature, it wasn't done with the intention of getting anything back. but after many minutes of bargaining, he relents and allows you to invite him over for a homecooked meal. this is when you guys talk it all out, explain that both of you have felt a Spark but didn't want to Assume so you'd been dialling it back to protect your friendship with each other. naturally: tom ends up spending the night, but not a lot of sleeping happens, if you catch my drift

now in terms of what the dynamic is with you and older!tom:

he's still the menace he was in his younger days. you head into the office to give him the lunch he forgot to make bc he'd been running late too busy eatin something ELSE amiRIGHT and his coworkers tease you for being so in love that you'll bend over backwards for him and you know as soon as they've said that, that any second tom'll be leaning in once they're looking the other way to mutter in your ear about how you certainly were bent over backwards for him last night

speaking of, remember how he hated being in the office? not once he starts dating you. any excuse he can get to have you in there with him, whether his colleagues know or he's snuck you in, he's there

i also think that. okay i'm also co-opting @mypoisonedvine's idea of tom having a housewife kink, but hear me out. so, you know there's that saying, if you joke about a kink long enough, you'll end up into it? i think something similar-but-not-really happens to tom. where he works with a bunch of older men with "traditional" values, they're always making jokes about being in trouble with the missus, or about whether he can't stay after work bc you've got the dinner on and you're expecting him home. and tom isn't afraid to call them out on it, to tease them right back that it sucks for them that their partners aren't into them, but he's just built different. but the more he vocalises against being into the idea of you being a stay-at-home wife, the more taboo it becomes. which means the sexier that idea becomes. which means soon enough, he's dreaming about you, looking after the house while he makes sure he can look after you. it becomes obvious after a while that he's got a specific fantasy in mind for you, so he eventually tells you, and you're into it, too. especially considering construction pays pretty decently once you're up the ladder like tom is, technically you're one let's do it away from making your fantasy a reality. but there's just something about sensationalising something so easily obtainable, but not giving into it, that makes it all the more exciting for you both

i don't think either of you fully make your minds up about whether you want to start a family or live the dink (double income, no kids) life forevermore and use your money to spoil each other. i think you guys spend most of your twenties and maybe some of your early thirties just enjoying life, travelling the world, indulging yourselves, until eventually you settle down. a lot of yours and tom's friends, especially the ones who have already started families of their own, question why you wouldn't want to start young, grow up with your kids, and then enjoy your later years without the responsibility. but you and tom have talked it through, and his mindset has always been that you don't stop being a parent once the kid hits 18, and that he's always thought life was for living, not for saving up for a future that never ends up coming because you're forever saving up for it

i've written way more than i initially intended to LOL but yeah, i might make this something? i might not? idk. but this is my tommy. <3

#tom grant #tom grant x reader #tom grant imagine #tom grant reader insert #older!tom #older!tom grant

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plasmasimagination · 5 months

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Greetings ! I saw your match up event and I don't know if you're still up to it but I'll give it a shot anyways !

Fandom : Honkai Star Rail

Characters I don't want to be paired up with : Blade, Sampo (sorry boys)

Ahem, I'm an ISFP who's rising sign is Scorpio, moon sign is Aries and solar sign is cancer.

I absolutely adore writing, reading and exploring outside, urbex is the best thing I've ever known in my entire life. I'm also trilingual ! I just like languages so I'm studying them, probably to travel later although I might just change and get a bachlors degree in psychology just so I can help people. I also love swimming, favorite sport ngl. I forgot to mention, my pronouns are she/her and I'm bisexual though I lean a little more towards women (bless them).

In terms of personality I'd say I'm pretty shy and quiet with strangers but once I know them I'm a goofy dumbass and seem pretty extroverted because I become rather chatty. People have mentioned how intimidating I look, I'm about 5'8 and fairly fit with broad shoulders. So some have approached me out of curiosity and because I look mysterious (their words not mine). Though I'm a big teddy bear, my love language is physical touch and quality time after all.

Aside from my height I have middle length wavy (mb fluffy too ig) brown hair and brown eyes. I wear glasses or else I can't see crap. My clothing style is rather tomboyish, I prefer brown and beige colours and wear pretty simple things (tho I make them stylish).

Some details about myself are that I really like a good challenge and annoying the heck out of someone, some say I seem a little sadistic with my teasing lmao. Despite being chatty I'm rather laid back and quiet.

Have a good day btw ! I hope it was enough.

HELLO THERE SWEETHEART YAYAYA, so you didn't mention which gender you want to be paired up with so i just decided to give you uh...both? Bisexual problems frfr anyyyywaaays, matchup go!

March 7th!

Okay okay I know you might be asking why and stuff, so first off, who are you to question my way? (/J) and second here's why!

I always like to pair up introverts and extroverts together so they can balance each other out

And you two would fit so well, like-

Intimidating girlfriend that looks like she could beat your ass, and cute smol girlfriend protected

IDK I JUST FIND IT ADORABLE

You might say that you see her more as a friend but I think you two would start off as friends and then turn into something more

Also two chatty cuties would be a blast to be with one another, like I like to imagine march would enjoy chatting with you even if it's just random ranting about insignificant stuff and then be excited to hear your opinion on the insignificant stuff😭

Welt!

Calm collected and reserved

A complete opposite of march yet still a fit for you

This time two introverts together, who enjoy each others company

He prefers to listen to you talk rather than talking himself, but he does enjoy making small comments or chuckling at your stories

Very interested in your writing hobby

Will ask you to show him the newest thing you wrote, he gives constructive criticism but also praises, a tiny bit ;)

Your annoying won't work in him because he will just see it as your personality (ouch) and will sit there with a small smile on his face

Also enjoys different languages and will be fairly impressed by your knowledge, sometimes will ask a thing or two about a certain thing he's unsure of

Doesn't mind your displays of affection, quality time and acts of service are his so he's completely content and happy with spending time with you

About physical contact, he's rather not the one to initiate it, but if you do it first he'll have no trouble ab it

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seducemefanficsandheadcanons · 3 months

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Request/Disclaimers

Please never be shy in making request and messaging me. I'm always looking for friends in the seduce me fandom.

I'm always taking request for one shot's unless I post otherwise,

Rules and Disclaimers

This is a Seduce Me the Otome blog, so I won't be writing for outside fandoms. Mainly because I don't like trying new things but also because I'm not in any other fandoms I feel comfy writing about.

I will not write detailed rape or pedophilia. If someone wants a character to have a history/recovering from the trauma of it, that is okay. BUT I will not write about the actual scenario. If the character is SA during the story, I will add something like passing out or just a time skip.

I will not write incestual relationships between the boys.

I will write fluff, nsfw, angst, trauma, self-harm, alcohol and marijuana use, grief, etc. That doesn't mean I'll be any good at it. I will always put a trigger warning on the posts that have this content.

I'm a bisexual female, so I'm not confident writing for a male MC, HOWEVER if you request gender neutral, I will try that.

6. If I do a one shot and you would like me to continue it, just ask. I may be able to, I may not be. It depends if I see the story going any further.

Please feel free to give constructive feedback on my work. I am far from a great author (yet), but I would love to get there.

Please be patient. Sometimes I struggle with certain requests, so if I don't get it done quickly, please don't think I forgot or ignored your request.

If you want to do your own continuation to my work, just ask.

ANYWAY, I love you<3

#seduce me the otome #seducemeotome #seducemetheotome #fanfic #seducemefanfiction #I don't know what else to tag this

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missingspaceships · 9 months

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was thinking about ken in the barbie movie and also the love interests in the animated barbie movies (specifically the twins from diamond castle because they are a delightful example of this) and like. there was a good commentary on gender's place irl going on there of course! but it's also just a wonderfully accurate representation of being a kid inventing a story with a love interest (which in turn probs says stuff about how we socialize kids about gender and romance)

like i'm just thinking about how when i played pretend as a kid or wrote my first stories there often were central love interests but less because i was really super interested in romance and more because i thought stories were just kind of supposed to have love interests in them. and that's why ken doesn't do anything! because little girls are aware enough to know that a female character is Supposed to have a boyfriend who loves her but not enough to know what that means or to actually want what it entails. ken wants to stay over "because we're girlfriend-boyfriend" but neither he nor barbie knows what they actually intend to do! that's just the script so they follow it!

and like i get all the "he's just ken" stuff and i get why it's fun but i also think it ends up glossing over the reason WHY ken is kind of airheaded and purposeless. and it's not because kens (slash men) are just useless in this universe, it's because the kids playing with the dolls don't understand why ken is there. they're told there needs to be a boyfriend but they're not told what boyfriends do or why a girl would want one (because kids are allowed to be pressured into gender roles and certain forms of sexuality but not like. actually informed about what those things mean or how to experience them in an empowered way). and since kids' imaginations create the reality of barbieland, and THEY don't know what the point of ken is, KEN doesn't know what the point of ken is.

and a lot of people are talking about ken's character as a reversal of the way women are typically portrayed in movies and that's definitely true. and in addition in light of what i was just saying i think there's something there about how like. if a person is always presented to you as a one-dimensional character you will struggle to identify with them. and that's not me saying ken's himbo vibes are in any way the same as years of insufficient representation of women in media. i just mean like. maybe if boys and girls were allowed to see each other as people instead of counterparts in some bizarre pageant they don't understand they would get along a lot better. gender sure is a construct huh

anyway i love that ken's personality works on a meta level and serves the themes of the story but also just makes sense according to established in-universe mechanics i think that's very fun

#side note but the animated barbie movies were so good at knowing what a little girl's imagination was like #the devoted but vaguely empty love interests #the plethora of animal sidekicks #the magical friendship necklaces the solving problems with song #somehow they really Knew how tiny me's logic worked #barbie #barbie movie

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bloodonmybarbieshirt · 10 months

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Gonna share a little personal experience of the mildest transphobia from the weirdest source.

I was intentionally dressing to not pass. I'm scared of my stepdad's reaction when I come out, so I was dressed as butch as I had remembered to pack to go visit my stepdad and mom while I was in town. (The rest of my family knows and is some level of ambivalent "you do you" supportiveish).

I finish up there and go out and in various ways I find myself at an unfamiliar aquarium supply store. I was waiting for an attendant to finish up and some tall white guy with a good haircut standing next to me goes "nice boots, man". I go "huh, guess the not passing fit works" and then realize, hey, I like my boots too! So I start happily trying to nerd out about boots with this guy, talking about the boots themselves, the construction, the buying experience vs other, better constructed brands (I was wearing red wing iron rangers, a "respectable but not special" high end boot. I wear a women's 11 wide and large, dark boots make your feet look bigger). After about 20 seconds I realize this guy knows absolutely nothing about boots, but he is politely bemused and seems to be enjoying the talk so why not, guess I'll keep talking with him. He keeps somewhat friendly-ly talking about men's fashion and boot construction and we bitch about how there are no good cobblers near here and how we both travel for that sort of thing.

Then about a minute in I notice his tattoo on his right inner arm. It says "proud boy" in a font that looks exactly like the bellingcat font. Then it all clicks - I look like a not PERFECTLY well passing trans woman, he's literally a proud boy, he was trying to test the waters to see if he should hate crime me and I limbo'd under it being socially okay to be weird about my gender by just unironically loving men's fashion as a woman.

Either that or I'm misinterpreting his literal proud boy tattoo.

I paid for my mouse and left and then my truck broke down twice on the drive home. Ah well, it's a living.

Anyways here's a photo of the "trying to not pass" fit taken from my stepdad's weirdly large and well decorated bathroom. No I'm not sure how my stepdad hasn't figured it out yet.

#mtf #red wings #trabsphobia #maybe?#author rambles #don't get me wrong I'm definitely relieved it went like it did #I'm just also so confused by the whole interaction y'know?#goodyear welt

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