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#it was a wild day in my household
pocketclowns · 1 year
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hope y’all like pancakes, meet amelia! 🥞
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famewolf · 7 months
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after I finished every story mission in ESO I thought to myself 'I think I'm going to replay Skyrim and use my old game guide and do every single quest in Skyrim'. and then Baldur's Gate 3 came out
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rook-specter · 10 months
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seriously, my dad's a fucking menace and he deserves to burn
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chika-nyan · 2 months
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Splats on the ground! Heyo buddos! Otome day probably on Thursday this week? Gonna touch base with work again, but I’ll likely be out the remainder of the week to fully recover from illness wheeze. Every day I’m getting better, 100% next week hopefully 8’U)b
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I just. I think I should probably snack more but a) that's Not What We Do In This House and b) I wouldn't dare so what's even the point of trying
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kermits-cup-of-tea · 10 months
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we are children
my brother and i
giggling in the back seat
of our new well loved car
putting coffee mug stickers
on the inside of the front seats
squeaky clean leather
covered in orange spots.
later,
we get in trouble
and forget why it was funny
the stickers stay up.
we are adults
my brother and i
strangers in the same room
of our childhood house
the coffee mug stickers still hold
on the front seats of my car
old and dirty leather
covered in orange spots.
its been years,
he still gets in trouble
and we no longer laugh
the stickers stay up.
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samwisethewitch · 23 days
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Homemaking, gardening, and self-sufficiency resources that won't radicalize you into a hate group
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It seems like self-sufficiency and homemaking skills are blowing up right now. With the COVID-19 pandemic and the current economic crisis, a lot of folks, especially young people, are looking to develop skills that will help them be a little bit less dependent on our consumerist economy. And I think that's generally a good thing. I think more of us should know how to cook a meal from scratch, grow our own vegetables, and mend our own clothes. Those are good skills to have.
Unfortunately, these "self-sufficiency" skills are often used as a recruiting tactic by white supremacists, TERFs, and other hate groups. They become a way to reconnect to or relive the "good old days," a romanticized (false) past before modern society and civil rights. And for a lot of people, these skills are inseparably connected to their politics and may even be used as a tool to indoctrinate new people.
In the spirit of building safe communities, here's a complete list of the safe resources I've found for learning homemaking, gardening, and related skills. Safe for me means queer- and trans-friendly, inclusive of different races and cultures, does not contain Christian preaching, and does not contain white supremacist or TERF dog whistles.
Homemaking/Housekeeping/Caring for your home:
Making It by Kelly Coyne and Erik Knutzen [book] (The big crunchy household DIY book; includes every level of self-sufficiency from making your own toothpaste and laundry soap to setting up raised beds to butchering a chicken. Authors are explicitly left-leaning.)
Safe and Sound: A Renter-Friendly Guide to Home Repair by Mercury Stardust [book] (A guide to simple home repair tasks, written with rentals in mind; very compassionate and accessible language.)
How To Keep House While Drowning by KC Davis [book] (The book about cleaning and housework for people who get overwhelmed by cleaning and housework, based on the premise that messiness is not a moral failing; disability and neurodivergence friendly; genuinely changed how I approach cleaning tasks.)
Gardening
Rebel Gardening by Alessandro Vitale [book] (Really great introduction to urban gardening; explicitly discusses renter-friendly garden designs in small spaces; lots of DIY solutions using recycled materials; note that the author lives in England, so check if plants are invasive in your area before putting them in the ground.)
Country/Rural Living:
Woodsqueer by Gretchen Legler [book] (Memoir of a lesbian who lives and works on a rural farm in Maine with her wife; does a good job of showing what it's like to be queer in a rural space; CW for mentions of domestic violence, infidelity/cheating, and internalized homophobia)
"Debunking the Off-Grid Fantasy" by Maggie Mae Fish [video essay] (Deconstructs the off-grid lifestyle and the myth of self-reliance)
Sewing/Mending:
Annika Victoria [YouTube channel] (No longer active, but their videos are still a great resource for anyone learning to sew; check out the beginner project playlist to start. This is where I learned a lot of what I know about sewing.)
Make, Sew, and Mend by Bernadette Banner [book] (A very thorough written introduction to hand-sewing, written by a clothing historian; lots of fun garment history facts; explicitly inclusive of BIPOC, queer, and trans sewists.)
Sustainability/Land Stewardship
Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer [book] (Most of you have probably already read this one or had it recommended to you, but it really is that good; excellent example of how traditional animist beliefs -- in this case, indigenous American beliefs -- can exist in healthy symbiosis with science; more philosophy than how-to, but a great foundational resource.)
Wild Witchcraft by Rebecca Beyer [book] (This one is for my fellow witches; one of my favorite witchcraft books, and an excellent example of a place-based practice deeply rooted in the land.)
Avoiding the "Crunchy to Alt Right Pipeline"
Note: the "crunchy to alt-right pipeline" is a term used to describe how white supremacists and other far right groups use "crunchy" spaces (i.e., spaces dedicated to farming, homemaking, alternative medicine, simple living/slow living, etc.) to recruit and indoctrinate people into their movements. Knowing how this recruitment works can help you recognize it when you do encounter it and avoid being influenced by it.
"The Crunchy-to-Alt-Right Pipeline" by Kathleen Belew [magazine article] (Good, short introduction to this issue and its history.)
Sisters in Hate by Seyward Darby (I feel like I need to give a content warning: this book contains explicit descriptions of racism, white supremacy, and Neo Nazis, and it's a very difficult read, but it really is a great, in-depth breakdown of the role women play in the alt-right; also explicitly addresses the crunchy to alt-right pipeline.)
These are just the resources I've personally found helpful, so if anyone else has any they want to add, please, please do!
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superhumanfoods · 4 months
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We need to talk about Sending Rocks.
You probably don't understand what that means. That's fine. It's a weird little example I made up, and I'll explain.
I'm the creator of the near-future cyberpunk podcast SINKHOLE. SINKHOLE is weird, short-form, nearly impossible to explain to people, and utterly unmonetizable. It's also got a very healthy listenership for something so esoteric. (I promise season three is coming; life just keeps happening, constantly.)
Because of that, I have a reputation as a weird little indie creator. And if I were to run a crowdfund, I could set up a donation tier that was literally just
"I will go outside, find a rock on the ground, and mail it to you."
and most people would find that funny and charming. I think, at worst, people might find it puzzling, but they'd still opt in out of curiosity.
A lot of you would let me send you rocks.
Now we need to talk about the re: Dracula crowdfund- about the zines. A handful of people got very upset about the perceived lack of quality present in the zines.
That caught me off-guard. To me, a zine should always be kind of janky. You should be able to tell exactly how far down the pile your specific zine was based purely on how committed to hitting the fold lines the person folding it was. Zines are handmade and should feel handmade.
So it seemed like people were complaining about the zines being zines, and I didn't get it.
And then I realized something: it's not about the zines. It's about the fact that they were coming from Tal Minear.
If Tal Minear ran a crowdfund and set up a donation tier that was just
"I will go outside, find a rock on the ground, and mail it to you."
I would give it about a day before someone found a way to turn that specifically into a talking point about how Tal doesn't respect the audio drama community.
Tal Minear cannot send rocks. The zine was never the problem. The way people think about Tal is the problem.
We need to talk about how this community keeps trying to reinvent classism based on nothing but vibes and follower numbers.
I'm going to tell you something you already know but probably don't want to admit: the independent audio drama scene is to the independent film scene what a fish tank in a dentist's office is to the ocean.
The biggest names in this community are just a step up from being nobodies.
If you went outside right now and spoke to the first person you saw on the street, the only non-BBC fiction podcasts you would have any realistic hope of them knowing are Welcome to Night Vale or Archive 81- and the latter only because it got turned into a Netflix show, which means that they might not even realize it was a podcast first. There's also a chance they'll have heard of The Magnus Archives, but it's not a guarantee by any means.
Now, this last one I've mentioned to a few people, and was surprised to get a lot of pushback. There seems to be this thought that no, of course everyone has heard of The Magnus Archives.
No. No, man.
You're doing the Homestuck thing. I hate to hurt you like this, but you're doing that thing people did where they assumed everyone had at least heard of Homestuck.
There are people in your life that have never heard of Homestuck.
The Magnus Archives was a mini-zeitgeist in which the fandom engaged in wild speculating, plentiful shipping, and lots and lots of aligning yourself with a specific Fear.
And it was never as big as Homestuck.
I'm sorry. Jonny Sims is not a household name. That's simply the truth.
He is also in this fish tank with us. As far as I am aware, he has not escaped to begin acting in feature films or begun voicing characters in massive video game franchises. Slay the Princess was pretty cool. It's not exactly fucking Assassin's Creed, though.
He doesn't even have a Wikipedia page.
And notice how my metric for breakout success involved going to other, better-known mediums? That's because a breakout success in this community involves getting a blurb on Buzzfeed or in Cosmo. There is no audio fiction podcasting elite. The idea is hilarious.
Even Markiplier doesn't count, because he's YouTube royalty. He's not famous because of The Edge of Sleep. The same is true of any celebrity. They're visitors. They didn't get their break here.
Tal Minear is not your landlord. They're a slightly bigger fish in the same tank as you that likes to poke around in the muck a bit more than you personally enjoy. And, well, you cannot argue that Tal's position as showrunner of re: Dracula justifies framing them that way.
Because the thing is, I'm not just the creator of SINKHOLE. I'm also the showrunner and head writer of Mayfair Watchers Society as of season two. Showrunning and writing is most of my income these days. Tal and I are very comparable in terms of the material power we wield. This isn't a secret.
And yet, a lot of you would still let me send you rocks.
Now the actually important thing.
We need to talk about how this exact illusion, this fanciful idea that there are real industry goliaths in this fishbowl, has already been used to justify the mistreatment of marginalized people.
When Tonia Ransom brought up the issues she had with how the AnonymousAD tumblr had characterized her crowdfunding campaign, this is the reason why people felt they could dismiss and ignore her. Because yes, she's a black woman speaking out about having been wronged, but she's also a "Big Creator," and therefore it evens out.
It doesn't even out.
A lot of the most successful creators you know in this space still have day jobs. I spent yesterday and today doing inventory at my retail job. I spent hours poring over shitty little badly printed tags and biting back swear words because our owner will not let us close, so there were still customers in the store, actively buying the things we were trying to count.
This Us vs Them shit has got to stop. It's nothing. It's a parody and a sham. If you tried to explain it to your grandmother, she'd give you the exact same reaction as if you had tried to tell her about drama in the Homestuck fandom.
Because it's the same.
And you don't get to use it to justify being shitty to someone who you know perfectly well would deserve your humility and understanding if you weren't pretending they were your boss.
Who can send rocks is not and has never been a reflection of real power or privilege. Deciding someone cannot send rocks is just a convenient excuse to disregard their perspective when it makes you angry or uncomfortable.
At best, it's tilting at windmills. At worst, it is punishing your peers for daring to defend themselves or speak out against injustice while being marginally more successful than you.
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kiwi · 8 months
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i cannot wait to tell yall about this WILD arg that some mysterious stranger is putting my household through. i wouldnt believe it if it wasnt happening to me
we make a monthly zine that accepts submissions, and someone emailed in this poem...
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right away we noticed the capital letters and put them together.
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Holy shit.
We thought it was cool, but had nothing else to solve. Then, the next day... A stranger asks one of our friends at their place of work if they know the editors of the magazine, hands them a beaten up envelope, and walks away.
On the outside is the name Malum Mors and the coordinates to a local fountain. INSIDE...
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It solves to say "caesar cipher," a kind of cipher where you move letters in a message a certain number down the alphabet. the sum of the three 3's gave us 9, but nothing to decode yet.
Again, we hit a dead end. THEN.... an account with no content followed us. In the description was this:
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Using the caesar cipher number, it says "What are you looking at?"
But guys. there is So. Much. More. its been so exciting and a little creepy, ill update this post once we write our article about this baffling chain of puzzles and riddles we've been getting
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bratzforchris · 2 months
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Moonlight, M. Sturniolo
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*:・゚✧*:・゚✧*:・゚✧*:・゚✧*:・゚✧*:・゚✧*:・゚✧*:・゚✧*:・゚✧*:・゚✧*:・゚✧*:・゚✧*
Summary: Matt's favorite way to unwind after a long week of work is to smoke and enjoy the benefits that come with having you as his girlfriend. Songfic; loosely based off of "Moonlight" by Kali Uchis
Pairing: Matt x feminine reader
Warnings: Smut, drug use (marijuana) and sex under the influence, p in v, oral (f receiving), fingering, masturbating (m), cowgirl, marking, dirty talk, pet names (baby girl, doll), really long
Word Count: 3k
A/N: This is not a want...it's a need. Anyway, enjoy some smut to start your Monday the right way ;)
*:・゚✧*:・゚✧*:・゚✧*:・゚✧*:・゚✧*:・゚✧*:・゚✧*:・゚✧*:・゚✧*:・゚✧*:・゚✧*:・゚✧*
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Friday nights were Matt’s favorite night of the week. After a long week of work and the Friday video going up, he could finally enjoy true, quality time with you. You two would make dinner together, talking about each other’s week and sharing both your high points and low points. That was nice, sure, but he enjoyed what came after far more. You would sit out on the back deck together, passing a joint back and forth and gazing up at the stars. Sometimes these nights were quiet and would end with you both tucked up into bed, passed out before midnight. Other nights, the weed would loosen your tongues, leading to playful banter and clothes strewn across the living room. 
✧˖°.
“Hey sweetie,” You smiled as Matt stepped into the kitchen, holding a brown paper bag. “How was your day?”
“It was fine,” Matt shrugged, coming around the island to wrap his arms around you as you stirred the pot on the stove. “Nick and Chris were good. We got the video up smoothly so…successful Friday, I guess.”
You turned towards your boyfriend’s chest, spoon still in hand. “That wouldn’t happen to be my favorite salsa, would it?” You asked, gesturing towards the paper bag in his hand. 
“Oh, I dunno,” Matt kissed your forehead playfully. “What do I get out of it if it is?”
“A kiss? Best boyfriend of the week award?”
“I’m the only boyfriend of the week,” he grumbled, a smile dotting his face. “But yes, it is your favorite salsa.”
You squealed as Matt set the bag down, immediately tearing into it. Your favorite salsa was locally made, only sold in the small bodega near the triplet’s old house on the outskirts of LA. Ever since you and Matt had gotten your own place in favor of furthering your relationship, the salsa had become more of a rarity, making you cherish Matt even more every time he went out of his way to get it. 
“The tacos are done!” You exclaimed proudly as you began to set out the spread. 
“I’m more interested in this spread,” Matt snorted, landing a smack to your ass. “Are those new leggings?” he had gravitated towards your kitchen table, sitting down in one of the chairs with that cursed manspread that would’ve looked humiliating had it been on anyone else. 
You looked down at the black leggings you had put on earlier in the day for this sole purpose. You’d just gotten them in the mail yesterday, and you knew they would drive Matt absolutely wild. He had a slight obsession with you in black. Nevertheless, you decided to have a bit of fun with him, smiling with a blush. 
“Later, Bernard. We’re about to eat.” You knew Matt hated his middle name, and you could only dream of the ways he would get back at you later for it. 
Sure enough, Matt groaned, burying his face in his hands. “I hate my middle name. It’s so stupid.”
“I disagree,” You giggled, fixing Matt’s plate. “I think MaryLou picked a lovely name.” You smiled, setting his plate in front of him and planting a kiss on his plump lips. 
You quickly fixed your own plate, setting down in the spot across from Matt. Taco Friday was a weekly tradition in your small household, as was sharing the week’s highs and lows. You listened as Matt talked about a recent milestone he had hit on his personal YouTube channel, but your eyes were more fixated on his lips. It’s not that you didn’t care about what he had to say; rather, you were just so overwhelmed by how purely handsome your boy was. 
“What was your favorite thing this week?” Matt asked you kindly after a while. 
“Oh um,” You blushed, pushing your empty plate away and standing. “Does this count?” You hummed seductively, straddling yourself across Matt’s lap and tangling your hands in the hair at the nape of his neck as you kissed him. 
Your boyfriend moaned into the kiss, grunting and shifting as your leggings brushed over his sensitive cock. “What happened to later?” he teased, a small smirk tugging at the edges of his mouth. 
“You’re just hot,” You giggled. “That’s all.”
You usually weren’t as bold as you had been just now, normally opting to let Matt take the lead on affection and sexual encounters. Something was different about tonight, though. You couldn’t keep your eyes off him as you two cleaned off the table, or when you stood side by side at the sink, tag teaming the dishes. 
The air thrummed with the sparks that were flying between you as you changed into one of Matt’s big t-shirts and comfortable shorts and him into a white shirt and plaid pajama pants. Even though it was early, you always liked being in comfortable clothes to smoke; it made the experience more enjoyable. 
You didn’t miss the way Matt’s eyes rinsed over your body in his clothes. Even after over two years together, it still made his head spin that you were all his. Every inch of your body belonged to him, and him to you. He loves your body, how smart you were, your adorable face, and the way you lit up from the inside with joy whenever you were happy. Like right now, as you grabbed your rainbow striped pouch from your nightstand and grabbed his hand, tugging him out onto the back deck. 
“This is probably my favorite time of the week,” You announced, smiling as you plopped down in one of the deck chairs. “I love the view.” You hummed quietly, gazing up at the darkening sky as the stars began to peek out. 
“I love this view more.” Matt cooed, tapping your nose. 
“You’re so corny.” You giggled, but blushed nonetheless. 
You opened your pouch, pulling out a blunt and lighter while Matt turned on the speaker, playing Mac Miller’s Swimming album. The lighter in your hands was a special one; it had become a custom gift your boyfriend had given you for your most recent birthday, with a picture of you both on the vinyl wrap. It had been a gag gift at first, but Matt smiled every time you two used it, simply because it reminded him of all the times you two had shared. 
“You want first hit?” You asked him. 
“Nope,” Matt told you. “Ladies first.”
“Such a gentleman.” You laughed, hanging the joint between your lips as you lit up. 
You inhaled for a moment, letting the sweet smoke fill your lungs, before exhaling and passing it to Matt. Even though there were only two of you, you had to say that this was your dream rotation if you could call it that. Matt was perfect in so many ways. He was in tune with all your moods and now was no exception. He had his eyes trained on you as he took a long drag, before turning his head and blowing a cloud of smoke towards the night sky. 
“I’m so fucking lucky.” he hummed, staring up at the moon as you took another hit.
“Me too.” You smiled, scooting your chair closer to him as the joint dangled between your lips. 
“Like…I live this fucking amazing life. I get to have fun with my brothers for a living and then I get to come home to my own house at twenty years old. I have my own house and a beautiful girlfriend,” Matt paused to look at you, suddenly shy. “And you support me more than anyone else ever has and I just…I’m really lucky and I love you.” he whispered, the weed already loosening his tongue, despite only having one hit. 
“I love you, Matty.” You whispered, pecking his cheek and passing the blunt back to him for another hit. 
Normally, Matt would protest anyone calling him Matty, but he loved you, and when you said it, it made his heart swell. He smiled, taking another long hit and blowing the smoke towards the stars. “I think I love you more.”
You smiled, curling into his side. You and Matt sat in silence for a while, passing the weed back and forth and enjoying the night sky and the music until Matt suddenly turned his head, looking at you. 
“You’re really fucking beautiful.” he smiled, voice and body overall more relaxed than they had been an hour ago. 
No matter how long you and Matt had been together, his words about how gorgeous or perfect you were never failed to make your cheeks heat up and the butterflies in your tummy take flight. You carefully put the lit joint out on a small ashtray that was laying on the outdoor table and then crawled out of your chair and into Matt’s lap, laying your head against his strong chest. 
“And I think you’re really handsome,” You hummed. “And sexy. Definitely sexy.” You giggled, still high from all that you had smoked. 
Your boyfriend held you on his lap by your hips, whispering sweet nothings to you as he kissed your lips softly, then moved along to your jaw. Each kiss was slightly more intense than the last as the moonlight shone down on you two, until Matt finally hit the sweet spot behind your ear, where he suckled softly, the scent of weed hot on his breath. Moaning involuntarily, you ground your hips against his lap, the ache that was blossoming in your growing as you felt his boner. 
“Do I turn you on? Making you need to get off on my leg, baby? Or is that weed talking?” Matt asked you, sneaking a hand inside your shorts. 
Just as he had suspected, you weren’t wearing any panties under the soft cotton, which allowed him to easily slide a finger between your folds. You whimpered as Matt left a trail of hickeys down your neck, rubbing soft, slow circles on your already-dripping clit. In between each new mark he added onto you, your lover would speak of all the things he loved about you and your body. Some of them were unintelligible in his smokey haze, others were little quirks you  didn’t even know he had noticed.
“Matt,” You whimpered, holding yourself steady against his shoulders as he fingered you. “Don’t be a teas…” Your words were cut off when he hit a particularly sensitive area, causing you to hiss with arousal. 
“I think we need to take this inside.” Matt chuckled, easily picking you up and wrapping your legs around his waist. 
He knew that he wouldn’t be able to control himself much longer. As much as Matt had grown in his letting go of anxiety over what other people thought, he really didn’t want your neighbors to watch you get fucked. That was for his eyes only. His cock was already threatening to burst with the need to just fuck you and feel every inch of your skin, of all of you, against him. 
Once he had successfully made it inside, still carrying you, of course, Matt began to kiss you with fervent need, not being able to hold back any longer. He didn’t break the kiss as he carried you into the bedroom, sitting down with you against him. 
“Oh doll,” he moaned, marking his love for you on your collar bone. “I can’t wait to eat that sweet little cunt until you’re absolutely dripping. Show you what happens when I get high, yeah? How much I think about you and your pretty pussy.”
You whined, gripping Matt’s hair in your hands as he pulled your (his) shirt over your head, admiring your bare breasts. He loved your tits, he really did, but that wasn’t what he was here for. Your boyfriend nipped at your boobs gently, making sure to leave enough of a mark for tomorrow. The soft flesh was turning pink with his hickeys as he sucked his way down your chest and tummy, laying you back against the bed. 
You were already arching and wriggling against the sheets before Matt had even gotten your shorts off. The sheer tone and implications of his teasing were making you wildly horny, eager to feel his tongue and fingers inside of you. Matt smirked when he finally, finally pulled the fabric off, eyeing the feast before him. You were already dripping, your thighs slick with arousal. 
He took his time to continue circling your clit slowly, teasingly, enjoying the way you whimpered and grunted. Once he began to pump a finger inside of you, it was downhill from there. You were grabbing onto anything you could; his hair, his biceps, his shirt, eager to just have him touch you more. Matt smirked at your eagerness as he thrust another finger inside of you, causing you to wiggle and whine. 
“Think you can handle my mouth, baby?” he asked you. “You know how much I love dessert when I’m high and this? This is the perfect dessert.”
Without another word he thrust his head between your thighs, eating you out at such a rapid, dizzying pace that your cunt was already clenching within the minute. Matt didn’t stop at just his mouth, though. His tongue was gliding over your clit while he pumped his fingers in and out of you, creating a sinfully filthy symphony of your little moans whimpers combined with him enjoying all that your pussy had to offer. 
“Matt…” You whimpered, panting with the need to climax. “Gonna cum.” you groaned, back arching. 
“Go ahead, baby,” he cooed in such an obscene way, it just turned you on more. “Cum all over my fingers and tongue.”
You didn’t need to be told twice. You immediately let go as your orgasm took you over, legs shaking and near-screams leaving your mouth. It was one of the strongest climaxes you had had in a while, leaving you greatly exhausted as white-hot heat released from your core. You fell back against the pillows, panting, as Matt lifted his head from between your legs. Your cum was dripping down his chin and his hair was a mess, but he didn’t seem to mind. He just licked his lips, a coy, wolf-like smile on his face. 
“You think we’re only going one round, baby girl?” he chuckled. “I haven’t even gotten you to cum on my dick.” 
Despite the roughness of your words, Matt placed a kiss on your forehead and lips, before pulling his own shirt and pants off. Not speaking again, your boyfriend began to jerk himself like there’s no tomorrow, head thrown back and eyes closed as his wavy curls fall across his sweaty face. You could tell by the look on his face that sinful fantasies of you were playing through his head, and that excited you as well, giving you more vigor for another round. 
Matt reached over to his nightstand, still palming his dick, and grabbed a condom. You heard the unmistakable sound of foil ripping, before your boyfriend rolled the rubber onto his cock. However, he didn’t immediately slam into you. Instead, he laid down beside you, looking up at you with lustful eyes. 
“Get on top. I wanna see that sexy face when I cum.” he groaned, his boner absolutely aching. 
Slightly nervous, but also excited, you climbed atop Matt’s legs and lined yourself up with him. You weren’t very versed in riding him, but when you did, it was always an experience. Matt nodded at you kindly when you began to pick up speed, whining with his eyes screwed shut as your hips bucked against his own. 
“Is this okay?” You asked seductively, but a hint of nervousness laced your voice. You were still rather high, and you didn’t want to do anything to make the wonderful night you two were having thus far miserable. “I don’t wanna ruin it…”
“No baby…” Matt hissed, throwing his head back. “This is perfect–oh god, right there, Y/N. Good girl.”
With his encouragement, you rode Matt faster, knowing he was close to his own orgasm by the look in his blue eyes. You were already sensitive from your first orgasm, and you always came quicker the second time. 
“Oh god,” You moaned. “Matt, I’m gonna…” You didn’t get a chance to speak again before you were clenching around his dick, your release taking over your body. 
The sound of you climaxing just revved up Matt’s hormones and he immediately came right after you, completely filling the condom. It was quiet for a bit, save for the sounds of you both coming down from your literal and sexual high, as you slid off of his cock, laying down beside him with a great sigh. Your boyfriend removed the used condom, tying it off and throwing it into the trash beside the bed, before scooping you into a spooning position. 
“That was great,” he yawned, naked body pressed against your own. “Can I say something?” he asked you shyly. 
“Always.”
“I feel less insecure when we have high sex…” Matt admitted shyly, voice trailing off at the end. 
“Honey,” You said firmly, but not unkindly as your head cleared. “I understand, but you know I love you regardless, right? You’re the best romantic and sexual partner I’ve ever had.” You smiled kindly, yawning as well. 
“Really?” Your boyfriend asked, a hint of hope in his voice. 
“Really,” You nodded. “I love you, Matt. You’re my sun, my moon, and all of my stars, babe.”
Matt blushed under the weight of your words, pulling you closer to him. “That makes me feel better, actually. Thank you.” 
“Don’t worry, hun. We’ll never lose our Friday night routine.” You placed a kiss on Matt’s cheek and the snuggled into his hold, ready to enjoy the rest of your favorite night of the week. 
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tags ♡: @aemrsy @jake-and-johnnies-slut @runasvengence @idek3000hi @oobleoob @faygo-frog @mayhem-72 @mimi-luvzyu @sunsetsturniolos @strnlvr @chrissturnswife @suyqa
note ♡: if you'd like to be added to my taglist, click here <3
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corroded-hellfire · 3 months
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As You Wish - Eddie Munson x Reader, Part 8
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Collaboration with the Dusty Bun to my Steeb @munson-blurbs 💚
Summary: The unresolved fight between you and Eddie continues as your birthday comes around and he still won't come to celebrate with you and your friends.
Note: I can't believe it's been over a year now since I started writing this series. That feels insane to me. I hope you enjoy this next chapter!
Warnings: alcohol, drunkenness, smut, p in v, unprotected (wrap it up), oral, f receiving
Words: 6.1k
[As You Wish masterlist]
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Today should have been perfect. 
For one, it’s your birthday, and it coincides with your off day from classes. You got a free coffee from the local café this morning. And your friends are planning a night out at the bar now that you’ve finally reached the legal drinking age. 
But it’s not perfect, because you and Eddie still haven’t spoken since your argument. To be honest, you’re not sure if he even wants to fix things. 
It’s all you thought about the whole day while you babysat Danny and Amelia Harrington. You force yourself to concentrate on the road as you drive to pick the older kids up from school, the youngest two safely buckled in the car seats. 
Ryan and Natalie walk out first, bundled up to fight off the heavy wind and animatedly discussing some intense second-grade gossip. Luke and Theo trail behind, play-fighting until they reach the car. 
The sliding doors have barely opened before Luke is climbing into the car and shouting, “HAPPY BIRTHDAY!”
You wince, massaging your ear with your forefinger. “Thanks, little man,” you say, and the rest of the group chimes in with their own cheers. 
“I got you a gift!” Luke chirps, something crinkling in his grasp. He hands you a bright blue snack pack of mini Oreos. It’s opened and currently only contains a single cookie. 
You smile gratefully, trying not to laugh. “My favorite!” you exclaim, taking the lone Oreo and popping it in your mouth. 
Ryan digs into his backpack and takes out a yellow piece of construction paper. “I made you this card,” he says shyly. 
It reads, “Happy Birthday to the best babysitter in the world!” Below the printed words, he’s drawn himself, Luke, you, and Eddie. Your heart pangs when you think about that stupid fight, the one where you’d both let your insecurities run wild. 
If this is the end of the relationship, how will you break it to the boys?
You don’t have time to ruminate on that before Luke leads everyone, even baby Amelia, into a very off-key rendition of Happy Birthday to You. Even if Amelia can’t speak yet, her melodic mumbling and gurgling only enhanced the performance. They’ve barely taken a breath after the song is finished before Natalie and Theo are asking questions. 
“How old are you?”
“Are you gonna have cake?”
“What presents did you get?”
Luke, of course, pipes up with a request of his own:
“Since it’s your birthday, can we get McDonalds? I want a Happy Meal.”
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When you get back to the Harrington household—sans McDonald’s to Luke’s disappointment—you situate the two youngest in front of the television and pop Mulan into the VHS player for them. Once you’ve made sure Amelia is securely in her walker and Danny is cuddled up on the couch between his favorite teddy bear and his stuffed rhinoceros, you head into the kitchen to prepare a snack for the older kids.
The four of them seem to be doing alright with their homework as you put one bowl of baby carrots and one bowl of Cheez-It crackers on the table. Unsurprisingly, four small hands grab for the processed orange snack, bypassing the healthier option all together. 
For the next hour or so you flit back and forth between the dining room to help with homework and the living room to attend to any toddler needs or upsets. The time passes quicker than you would’ve thought, and you’re surprised when you hear the front door unlocking. You had known Steve and Nancy would be coming home early today to give you a chance to go out and celebrate your birthday, but the hour snuck up on you. 
The moment that Amelia hears her parents step into the house, she’s no longer interested in the avalanche that buried the Huns and has the urgent need for her mom to pick her up. 
“They weren’t too much trouble, I hope,” Steve says as he reaches up to muss Theo’s hair. The little boy just ignores him as he tries to figure out the math problem he’s been working on for the last five minutes. 
“Nah, not too bad,” you say. Trying to contain a smirk, you lean in towards Steve and speak in a loud conspiratorial whisper. “Except…these two,” you say, gesturing to Ryan and Natalie. “Evil masterminds.”
Natalie just hmphs and tosses her light brown hair over her shoulder while Ryan sticks his tongue out at you. With a chuckle, you walk over and press a kiss to the top of the eldest Munson boy’s head. 
“I’m gonna get going, okay?” you tell him. The truth is that you definitely have time to spare before you have to start getting ready for the bar tonight, but you want to make sure you’re gone by the time Eddie gets here. 
Ryan turns in his seat to look at you and opens his mouth, but before he can speak Eddie enters the house. Your body has had many different reactions to Eddie over the course of you knowing one another, but the one that comes over you now is completely foreign. Heat seems to rise to your cheeks, but it feels like your veins are made of ice and you could snap them beneath your skin if you moved too quickly. 
Eddie toes off his chunky black work boots by the front door and does a double take when he sees you standing by Ryan. He gives you a tentative smile and you give a small nod in recognition. Needing to focus on something else, you look back down at Ryan and gently move some of his growing honey colored hair off of his forehead. You can still see Eddie in your periphery though. He’s coming closer towards you, and it feels like every step he takes makes your heart race a little faster. 
Once he’s so close that you can’t avoid looking at him, you notice a small pink gift bag in his hands. Eddie’s deep brown eyes are looking down at it too, but you both raise your heads simultaneously and meet each other’s gaze. Pain and longing radiate off the two of you so strongly that even baby Amelia could probably sense it. 
“Happy birthday, Sweetheart,” he murmurs, offering you the bag. 
Slowly, you reach out to take it, the white tissue paper that sticks out of the top crinkling beneath your fingers. You give Eddie a polite smile and start to leave, but Luke stops you in your tracks.
“You gotta open it!”
A nod is the only response you can give Luke, not trusting your voice—or even knowing what you’d say. Biting your lip, you ruffle through the pristine white tissue paper and pull out a pair of earrings fastened to an earring card. They’re beautiful. Three tiny hearts stacked on top of each other, all purple and connected by silver chain links. The urge to put them on immediately is strong, 
“The hearts…one’s for Ryan, one’s for Luke, and one’s for, um, me,” Eddie explains bashfully as he slips his hands into his pockets. 
Your eyes fill with tears, a cacophony of emotions in each drop. 
“Thank you,” you say quietly, bending down to hug Luke and Ryan. You stand up and face Eddie, feeling the boys’ eyes drilling into you as they wait for you to embrace their dad like you always do. 
You lean in and give him a small hug, lingering for an extra moment. He smells of motor oil and sweat, but you can’t get enough. It’s a test of wills to tear yourself away from him. As you pull back, a tight smile forms on your face.
“I should get going,” you tell them kindly.
“Where’re you going?” Luke asks. 
You ruffle his hair lovingly. “My friends are having a birthday party for me. But I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”
“Or,” Ryan offers, dragging out the word, “we could treat you to dinner tomorrow.”
Luke grins. “Can we go to McDonalds?”
You can’t help but laugh. The boys bring you more humor and joy than they could possibly imagine. 
“You boys are too much sometimes,” you tell them. If you’re being honest, you would love to spend time with them and Eddie, even if it’s just eating fast food. Anywhere with the three of them becomes its own adventure. It breaks your heart knowing there’s still this friction between you and Eddie and you’re not exactly on speaking terms. You can’t dwell on it, though. Not tonight.
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When you arrive at the bar, it’s bursting with people. Groups have gathered to celebrate St. Patrick’s Day, clinking oversized mugs teeming with foamy beer. It’s much noisier than you’d normally prefer, but you’re glad for the excess sound to drown out your thoughts. 
Jess spots you immediately and waves you over to where she, Lily, and Paul are sitting in front of the bartender. As soon as you plop down on a stool, Lily places a sash around you. 
“It’s my 21st birthday? Really?”
“Well, it is!” she quips with a laugh. “Besides, people will totally buy you drinks if you wear this.”
She isn’t wrong. You take shot after shot, eventually losing track of the total amount. A tiny voice in your head reminds you not to mix light and dark liquor, but it’s too late for that. 
Your friends keep toasting to the ‘birthday girl,’ which prompts more people to cheer and offer to treat you to another round. By the time you get up to dance, your head is spinning. 
You sway along to Bon Jovi’s ‘You Give Love a Bad Name’ until you can no longer stand. Jess is kindly letting you lean on her, her arm wrapped around your waist, when you feel a soft tap on your shoulder. 
“Can I buy you a drink?” an unfamiliar voice asks, tone laced with sultriness. 
You turn around to see a guy about your age, a ten-dollar bill between his pointer and middle fingers. 
“Oh, I-I shouldn’t,” you start, but Lily jumps in instead. 
“She would love that.” She smiles at him, then whispers in your ear, “the best way to get over Eddie is to get under someone else.” She sticks out her hand to the mystery man and introduces both herself and you. I don’t want to get over Eddie, your brain thinks before drunkenly attempting to focus on what the man in front of you is saying now.
Mystery Man smiles. “I’m Stefon.”
Unbeknownst to you, one Wayne Munson is watching the entire encounter from across the bar. It isn’t his usual digs, but the guys from the plant invited him out for drinks to celebrate the holiday, and he obliged. 
He sees you take another drink with trepidation, a young man resting his hand on your hip. It seems like you’re barely aware of what’s going on, sending a queasiness through Wayne’s stomach that definitely isn’t from the alcohol. He’s used to minding his business, but when the guy puts his arm around you, he makes the decision to call Eddie from the payphone. 
Just under fifteen minutes later, Eddie is pushing his way into the smoky and boisterous bar, eyes anxiously scanning for you. A surge of relief floods his veins when he sees your beautiful familiar face amongst the sea of green clothing, but the feeling is short-lived when he sees you leaning on a strange man. 
It’s hard to tell if you’re aware that you’re leaning on him or not, because you’re talking to Lily animatedly. The man has his eyes glued to you, but he may or may not be on your radar. Your boyfriend isn’t waiting to find out, though. Eddie’s met your friend Paul who you’re out with tonight, so he immediately knows it isn’t him with you and Lily, so he shoves his way through the crowd and shoulders the mystery man out of the way and gently holds your arm to steady you. 
“C’mon, let’s go home,” Eddie says, speaking loudly to be heard over the crowd and music. He’s doing his best to be inconspicuous but you’re too drunk for that.
“Eddie!” You fling your arms around him in a hug and let out a loud and giddy laugh. Eddie feels a small surge of pride when you seem to forget all about the guy standing there—if you’d even remembered he was there to begin with. When he looks into your eyes, he can see the glassiness from the alcohol as well as glee that seeing him caused. “Eddie, what’re you doing here? You didn’t wan’ be here!” 
He takes a deep breath, inhaling a lung full of secondhand smoke. “You need water and sleep, baby,” he says, trying to be heard over the music.
“But it’s my party!” you whine, giving an exaggerated pout. “An’ you didn’t come ‘cuz you don’t love me.”
His brows shoot up as his heart falls. “I don’t love you?” Obviously, you’re drunk but that doesn’t mean it hurts any less.
“Nuh-uh.” You scrunch your nose. “Maybe you do, ‘cuz you’re here now.” Your frown quickly flips to a drunken smile. “We should dance! ‘Cuz you love me!”
Eddie tilts his head, giving you a skeptical look. “I thought you said I didn’t.” 
“But you came here to see me, so you do,” you explain as if it’s the simplest thing in the world. The fact that you’re swaying where you stand doesn’t help your credibility though.
Out of the corner of his eye, Eddie can see the man you were leaning on finally slink away. Apparently, he only needed to hear the confirmation that Eddie does indeed love you.
“Let me take you home, princess,” Eddie says, doing his best to keep the irritation out of his tone.
“That sounds like a line,” you say with a giggle that’s interrupted by a hiccup. 
“It’s probably the most chivalrous thing anyone’s said to you tonight,” Eddie says, looking around at the other men in the bar like they’re vultures, ready to step in and claim you for their own. “Come on, sweetheart.”
“Fine,” you lament with an over dramatic sigh. “But just cause you’re so cute.” You giggle again as you lean against Eddie. 
At least she’s leaning against me now, he thinks bitterly. Too exasperated for more words, Eddie just presses a kiss to the top of your head and laces his fingers with yours—tightly, so he won’t lose you in the crowded bar. 
Eddie catches Jess’s eye where she’s leaning against the bar and nods towards the door, letting her know that he’s taking you home. She nods in return and gives a thumbs up. Eddie scans the crowd to see if he can spot his uncle, but there’s just too many people.
“Hey, you’re not wearin’ green,” you say once you’re outside in the cool night air. The air feels fresh yet too silent after being in that stuffy place. 
“Hmm?” Eddie hums as he helps you into the passenger’s seat.
“No green! Is St. Pagrick Day though!”
“Your birthday is a far more important holiday,” he says as he closes the door for you. He doesn’t even consider if you heard the words or not, it was his inner monologue just coming out. 
The drive back to the apartment starts off with you chattering on, still feeling good from the drinks.
“It’s so cute that the boys wanna buy me MiDonal’s! They’re the sweetest boys ever. Where are we goin’? Oh, hey! You’re movin’ into your new aparment soon. Do you still wan’ me to—hey look, a dog!—wan’ me to go shopping for the stuff that you need? Eddie? Are you still mad at me? I hope not. I don’t like when we fight. I never wanna fight witchu. I love you! I never loved no one before, ya know. Just you! I was only bein’ such a pain in the butt because I wanna be by your side. Like partners. Wanna help you and have fun with you and do all the things with you. I hope you wanna be that with me too! Like Bonnie and Clyde! But no stealing or dying. Do you, hey, hey Eddie, do you remember that time a long time ago you said you liked that blue shirt I wore? Ya know, the one with the buttons and sleeves? Well, now it’s my favorite—”
Eddie glances over, concerned that your speech—that was highly amusing to him—stopped so abruptly. You’re just looking up at the streetlights as they pass, your eyes getting heavier by the second, the mesmerizing sight lulling you to sleep.
Eddie chuckles to himself and the rest of the drive is quiet.
When you finally arrive back at the apartment, you’re practically comatose in the passenger seat. Eddie half carries you up the stairs and holds you close to his side with one arm while he unlocks the door with the other.
Somehow, he manages to get you laying down on your bed without bumping into anything on the way. You look up at him with a sleepy smile that Eddie swears is the cutest thing he’s ever seen. 
“I’m gonna help you change, okay? I don’t think that dress will be comfortable to sleep in.”
You nod absentmindedly as Eddie grabs a pair of your pajama pants and an oversized t-shirt. Eddie is an expert at undressing you by now but it’s harder when your body can’t even hold itself up. The green dress gets stuck on your nose as Eddie pulls it off over your head and it makes you giggle, though it’s much softer than your laughter in the car. He slips your pink plaid pajama bottoms over your white lace panties and chuckles to himself as he sees he pulled a Rugrats t-shirt out of your drawer. An amused smile grows on his face as he shakes his head.
“Better?” he asks.
A big yawn accompanies the nod that you give him. Satisfied that you’re not going to fall over if he lets go, Eddie walks towards the head of the bed so he can pull your blankets down. It takes both of you working together to get you beneath the blankets.
Once you’re settled, Eddie shucks himself out of his jeans and t-shirt and climbs in bed next to you. Without any hesitation, you scoot over and rest your head on his chest. He wraps his arm around your shoulders and presses a kiss to your head.
Eddie isn't sure if in the morning, once you’ve sobered up, you’ll still be fighting or not. He doesn’t want to be, but he also knows the issues haven’t been resolved between the two of you. What you said tonight about Eddie not loving you definitely has to be addressed tomorrow—whether you were drunk or not when you said it, he doesn’t care. 
Soft snores begin to fill your room and Eddie smiles to himself. His eyes slip closed, and he holds you a little tighter against his body.
“Happy birthday, baby,” he says into the darkness.
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You wake up the next morning with a dull headache. It definitely could be worse, especially considering how much you’d drank last night. 
There’s two Tylenol and a bottle of water on your nightstand, none of which you remember putting there…
You shift positions and see Eddie curled up on the pillow next to you, wearing just his boxers. Soft snores punctuate the rise and fall of his chest. 
“Eddie?” you whisper, eyes wide. 
He stirs and stretches, giving you a small smile. 
“Morning, baby.” He presses a soft kiss to your forehead. “How’re you feeling?”
“Um, just a headache. Not too much of a hangover.” You’re working to figure out exactly why he’s here. 
He grins. “Must be nice to be 21,” he jokes. “I have one beer too many and I’m out of commission for a week.”
You’re too focused on the maybe-boyfriend-shaped elephant in the room to laugh at his joke. Instead, you take a deep breath and muster up all of your courage. 
“Did we, um…”
Eddie pulls back. “No. Nope!” He shakes his head. “I brought you home and we fell asleep. I promise.”
You nod, relief flooding your body. “Okay. Okay, good.” You swing your legs over the side of the bed. “I’m gonna take a shower.” 
“I’ll make some breakfast, okay?”
“Yeah. Okay.” 
You get out of bed and stretch your muscles before heading towards the door. But first you stop and look back at Eddie. “I didn’t do anything stupid last night, did I?”
“No,” Eddie assures you. “Your knight in shining leather got there before anything could happen.” He flexes his muscles dramatically, which causes you to chuckle as you step out of your room and into the bathroom. 
Eddie puts his clothes from yesterday back on and heads out to the kitchen. He makes pancakes, and you come out of your room freshly showered and dressed just as they’re ready. 
“Smells good,” you say, rubbing at your eye. The shower helped wake you up, but your body is still tired from last night. 
You and Eddie sit down across from one another and start eating in silence before you can’t take it anymore.
“Um, where are the boys?” you ask, desperate for some semblance of an interaction.
“Harrington’s,” Eddie answers before shoving a mouthful of syrup-covered pancake into his mouth. “Steve and Nance said they got them, I should go to you.”
“And, uh, why did you show up? I mean, did you change your mind about celebrating with us or..?”
Eddie sighs and shakes his head. “Wayne was, um, actually at the bar last night with some guys from his work. He saw some assholes starting to get handsy with you, so he called me.”
“Oh.” You stay quiet as you move a few pieces of pancake around on your plate. 
You had hoped Eddie had changed his mind and wanted to spend your birthday night with you after all, but he was only there because his uncle called him. 
Eddie bites his lower lip, hating the tension in the air. The two of you used to sit in comfortable silences with one another, so this is excruciating.
“Look, sweetheart,” Eddie says before pausing to clear his throat. “It’s not that I didn’t want to spend time with you. Because I did. I do. I always do. I just, I don’t know, thought I’d bring the party down. I didn’t want you to feel like I was supervision or some shit like that. And I wasn’t sure how I’d meld in with your friends.”
“Eddie,” you start before taking a deep breath. “I never think of you as some authority type figure. You’re just Eddie. Like, yeah, maybe you’re twelve years older than me, but I don’t really feel like there’s this chasm between us or anything. Do…do you?”
Eddie’s silent for a moment, making sure he picks his words carefully so as not to give you a wrong impression. “When it’s you and me? No. When it’s us and the boys? No. But when it comes to you hanging out with your friends, I guess I feel, I don’t know, like I don’t belong.”
“Belong where?”
He sighs and twirls one of his rings around his finger as a nervous twitch. “When I see your friends it’s this reminder that I’m not your age. It feels like all the shit that I try not to let bother me is unavoidable as I see you with guys it would be more socially acceptable for you to date. Or seeing your girl friends going off to do things with their boyfriends that I can’t because of my job and kids. It makes me feel selfish.” His eyes mist over for a second. “Like I’m keeping you from that.”
“Eddie, no one is keeping me from anything. Especially you. You act like I don’t have a choice or say in this. I’m pretty sure you didn’t kidnap me and rope me into an arranged marriage or something.” You give a small smile, hoping to ease some of the frustration radiating off of him. “I don’t want someone my age. I don’t want someone younger. I don’t want someone older that isn’t you.”
“I know that,” Eddie says. “I swear, I do. I guess I’ve had a number done on me, though. Got beaten down enough that the insecurity comes second nature. It’s not your fault, you shouldn’t have to pay for things that she did.”
“Can I beat her?”
He chuckles and seeing him smile makes a genuine one grow on your own face.
“She’s not worth it,” Eddie says with a shake of his head. “But I see where you were coming from with being upset. It probably did seem like I just didn’t want to go out with you and your friends. I’m sorry. I also get where you’re coming from with the court stuff. Wanting to be by my side. Princess, you have no idea how much that means to me. Honestly. I just…I don’t want you to have to be in the middle of all of that.”
“I know,” you say, lowering your eyes back down to your plate. “I’m sorry, too. I was overstepping when it came to Brittany. That’s your ordeal, you get to call the shots when it comes to that. I only want you to know that you have my support. In whatever way you need it.”
He reaches across the table and slips his hand into yours. “I promise to tell you in what ways I’ll need your support through this whole thing.”
You nod and give his hand a small squeeze. The air around you feels lighter and it’s as if weights have been lifted off your shoulders. 
“Are—Are we okay?” you ask, wanting to clarify.
“We’re more than okay,” he reassures you as he returns your hand squeeze with one of his own. “But there is something else we need to talk about.”
“Sure. What?”
He sighs and gently taps your entwined hands against the tabletop. “Last night…when I got to the bar to pick you up, you, um, you said something. I know you were drunk but it still hurt.”
Immediately you feel mortified. Did I really…?
“I thought you said I didn’t do anything stupid?”
“Well, this was saying something stupid.”
How bad was it that it’s making him stall like this? “What did I say?” You wince, afraid to hear what you might’ve said in your inebriated state.
“You, uh, you said that I didn’t love you. That I didn’t come to the bar with you and your friends because I don’t love you.”
Your eyes are immediately flooded with tears. The heartbreak and shame you feel for uttering something so absurd cuts you deeply, and you push yourself out of your chair and walk around the table to Eddie. He scoots back so you can perch yourself in his lap. 
Gently, you cup Eddie’s face in your hands and stare into his eyes. “I love you. I love you, I love you. Please always remember that. Sober, drunk, high, or otherwise in an altered state…I love you. I am so sorry I said that to you. It amazes me that somehow you love me, but that doesn’t mean I doubt it for a second.”
Eddie nods and wraps his arms around your waist. Your shirt rides up a little and his syrupy fingers rub against your skin—but you couldn’t care less.
“You’re mine,” you tell him. “I’m yours. Simple as that.”
“Simple as that,” Eddie agrees.
The two of you sit there together for a few silent minutes before Jess’s door creaks open and she shuffles into the kitchen, looking far worse than you felt when you woke up. She gives a half-hearted wave, as if even that small movement was too much for her. 
Eddie smiles and nods his head towards the kitchen counter. “I made a stack of pancakes for you,” he says.
Jess heads towards the counter but pauses to put a hand on your shoulder. “If you don’t marry him, I will,” she vows. 
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Deciding to play hooky from school and work didn’t take much convincing for you or Eddie. You’re not feeling great, and he’s more than happy to take care of you. 
You’re washing the breakfast dishes while Eddie stands behind you and wraps his arms around your waist. “Y’know,” he murmurs just under your ear, “I had another birthday surprise up my sleeve.”
He pulls you closer, and you try—and fail—to focus on the task at hand. “And what’s that?”
He smirks and presses soft kisses into your neck. “Well, I bought a bottle of champagne,” he says, “and I figured we could have some drunk sex?”
You snap off the water and dry your hands, spinning to face him. “And where is this bottle of champagne, handsome?”
Eddie blushes slightly. “Um, at the Harringtons’ place,” he admits. “But we could still do the sex part, if you’re feeling up to it.”
You press your body to his, grinning widely. “Bedroom?”
“Hell yes.”
Clothes are shed instantly, leaving a trail that leads to your room. You lay back on the bed and Eddie climbs on top of you, slotting his leg between yours and kissing you softly. 
“Let me take care of my birthday girl, hm?” he coos, nibbling on your ear. He chuckles when you whimper, two of his thick fingers trailing downward towards your pussy. “Oh, you poor thing. Needy already?”
“Mhm.”
He grins, scooting back and pressing his lips just above your clit. His tongue grazes your folds, over the sensitive bud, and he sucks on it gently. You moan when he positions your legs on his shoulders. “Keep making those noises, baby.”
You eagerly oblige, whining as he slips his middle finger into your pussy, tongue remaining trained on your clit. The overstimulation has you grinding against his face, desperate to get some relief. 
He wraps his free hand around your thigh and squeezes it, bringing himself even closer into you. Muffled, barely audible fucks and tastes goods escape his lips, driving you even wilder. 
“E-Eddie, I’m gonna cum!” you mewl, fingers digging into the bed sheets. He continues lapping at your cunt until you’re screaming his name. 
Eddie pulls back, face shiny with your slick. “Need you,” he growls, and his painfully hard cock bobs in agreement. 
He crawls up your body, pressing kisses to your soft flesh as he makes his way towards your neck. Teeth gently graze the side of your throat, and it sends a shiver down your spine. 
Taking advantage of your legs spread openly before him, Eddie settles himself between them and lines his cock up with your soaking entrance. It feels like it takes an eternity until he finally bottoms out, making you feel so full and revel in that exquisite stretch. 
Sweat breaks out along your hairline and it melds with Eddie’s as he rests his forehead against yours. The bed beneath you shakes as your body rocks with your boyfriend’s. A slight tilt of his hips has your hands scrambling against the lilac sheet below you, desperate to hold on to something—anything. Eddie wants you to hold on to him, though. His pale toned arms seek out your own until he slips his hands into yours and threads your fingers together. Never breaking eye contact even for a second, Eddie holds your hands up above your head, staring down at you with a blissful expression on his face. He’s not smiling, but there’s a light in his eyes and the way his lips part just slightly only adds to your enjoyment. 
“I love you, sweet girl,” Eddie says, voice low and husky in the small space you’re both occupying. “Don’t ever forget that.”
“L-Love you, too, Eds.”
“You’re so beautiful,” he says as his hips roll up against yours. “You have the cutest nose. I hope any kids we have inherit that from you.”
With every thrust of Eddie’s hips, he lists another thing he loves about you.
“Your lips are so soft. Sometimes I get torn between kissing them or staring at them. And your laugh? God, you have no idea what that does to me. It’s so infectious and bubbly and completely genuine. One of the best sounds in the world.”
There’s nothing else in the world right now other than Eddie’s voice and Eddie’s body. All that exists is the two of you, staring into one another’s eyes as pleasurable groans and whimpers fall from your lips. Sweet sighs and shared breath connect you both, adding to the already dizzying intimacy. You stare up into those large brown eyes and for that moment everything is perfect in the world. The moment belongs to you, and nothing will ever take it from you. 
Eddie leans in to press a soft, slow kiss to your lips. He pulls away only far enough for you to fix your gazes on one another’s eyes again. His hip thrusts are becoming increasingly erratic, a sign that he’s nearing his finish. 
Curls sway back and forth around his face, like a curtain keeping you two separated from everything else. 
More than anything, you know what’s going to have you reaching your high is the locked stares you share. Eddie looks so intently into your eyes, as if he’ll find answers to all of his problems in them. It’s sexier than any words either of you could possibly vocalize. The look says so much more than your voices ever could. 
“I’m close,” you tell him in a rough whisper. Your fingers tighten on his and Eddie’s hips rock slightly harder into yours.
“Me too, baby.”
The urge to close your eyes floats over you as your impending orgasm gets closer by the second, but you refuse. Even blinking is too long to look away from the eyes of the man you love. Eddie agrees, never taking those brown beauties off of you as he feels his release closing in.
“Eddie,” you whimper, more just needing to say his name than anything else. “Oh, Eddie, Eddie, Eddie.”
“I know, my love.” 
“Gonna cum, Eds,” you slur.
“With me, yeah baby?”
“Yeah,” you breathe out more than speak. 
All it takes is two more thrusts before Eddie’s spilling into you. Him coating your walls with his release is enough to have you falling headfirst into your euphoria as well. 
Both of you ride it out together, trying to squeeze every last drop of enjoyment out of it that you could from one another. By the lazy smiles you give one another as you try and catch your breaths, you’d say that you both enjoyed it very much.
Eddie leans down and presses a sweet but sensuous kiss to your lips before begrudgingly pulling out of you. Neither of you like it, so you’re quick to cuddle up to one another, desperate to have your arms wrapped around the warm skin of his middle. 
“That was…wow,” you say after a few minutes of companionable silence. 
“Very wow,” Eddie agrees, rubbing his hand up and down your arm. “Y’know, there’s something else I’d like to add to that list, now that I have blood flowing to my brain.”
“Yeah?”
“Your heart,” he says, kissing your forehead. “Just when I think it can’t get any bigger or warmer, you prove me wrong time and time again. The kindness and generosity that you have is something I’ve never seen in another person. You’re so amazingly you and I’ve been enchanted by it since the day I met you.  Sometimes I feel like this is all a fairytale except the prince is the one constantly swept off his feet.”
“The princess is too,” you assure him through increasingly labored breath. “Very, very swept.”
Letting your suddenly heavy eyes slip closed, you tuck your head beneath Eddie’s chin and revel in his touch. A nap with you in his arms sounds like heaven right now, but Eddie knows there’s something he has to say before he forgets.
“Baby?”
“Yeah?” Your sleepy voice brings a smile to his face.
“Luke asked me to bring over McDonalds.”
“C’mon, let’s go hit the drive-thru.” 
You move to get up, but Eddie keeps you right where you are.
“Not yet. Naps first. Food for gremlins later.”
You chuckle and press a kiss to his bare chest. 
“Naps first,” you agree.
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indycar-series · 2 years
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vent in the tags
#tw depression#i cant keep living in the vent channel in slub crub so im gonna vent in the tags#honestly been pingponging between feeling emotionally numb and feeling like a complete waste of space too much lately#i know this latest round was partially triggered by the monthly blood but i need to stop lying to myself about being ok#part of me wants to get help because in my current state i am doing a piss poor job of taking care of myself#but another part of me just wants to drop out of school move back home and waste away#i barely eat 1 meal a day anymore and dont have the energy to do basic household tasks#and when i do have energy the paralyzing fear of being perceived by other people keeps me from doing what i need to do#my lawn is starting to get overgrown because im terrified that my neighbors will see me mowing#and my roommate has mowed the last 3 times and its my turn to do it#i dont feel a real drive or sense of purpose and dont know what i wamt to do with my life#and honestly i wake up dreading every day#therapy doesnt help because ive figured out how to lie to therapists and medication sort of helps but doesnt stop the thoughts#im terrified of being honest with people because they'll see how much of a mess i am#honestly should have ended up in a psych ward months ago but im still out in the wild#i want to keep working toward a motorsport career but im lost and no leads are turning up results#part of me just wants to give up#i dont know what im supposed to do from here#i know i should talk to someone but i dont trust anyone irl with any of this#because if i tell one parent they'll just gossip to the whole family#if i tell my psychiatrist he'll just up my meds and tell my parents#and i only have 1 or 2 real irl friends neither of who i will admit any of this to#i just want to stop feeling empty inside all the time and actually move forward towards a life that will satisfy me#what that is i have no idea#anyways that was a lot sorry if anyone read all that
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lundenloves · 10 months
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dad!simon masterlist
welcome to emotion, come in, I'll pour you a cup of tea and explain what you're about to go through.
by signing this form i agree that (a) i will not threaten lundenloves or others due to dad!simon delusions (b) i am responsible for my own confusing thoughts 1.1 do i want this man to be my dad? 1.2 or do i want to fuck him? (c) i am responsible for my behaviour if reading while on my period, explosive ovaries are possible.
signature r3ader authors’ signature lund3nluv
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one-shots/two-shots → ¹ fatherhood I 1.1k | f!reader [ simon’s mind is racing when you go into labour during one of his deployments. he can’t seem to speak about it, nor stop worrying. not until he receives the phone call. ] → ² fatherhood II 1.3k | f!reader [ simon meeting his daughter for the first time. no other words are REQUIRED omf. ] → ¹ chaotic riley household 1k | f!reader [ being a father comes with the rush of a monday morning, and it's something simon has far from perfected. ] → ¹ taking his kid to base 1.3k [ his one day off was shared with another little someone, taking her to his base because he is an absolute fucking stresshead about work and just had to get something done early. soap and price cameos, the crowd goes wild. ] → ¹ baby's first words 1k | f!reader [ your baby speaks her first word to her father. was it a word or was it a noise? simon declines to answer. ] → ¹ i meet my father when he is a child 1.7k [ his daughter in her 3am feels bro. feeling like shit because he feels like shit pretty much - disgustingly upsetting if you have father issues. ]
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longer requests
→ bad arguments 1.2k [ a bad deployment leaves simon in an awful mood, his daughter has had enough and snaps. the big three words, and not the three you're thinking! why! ] → 141 meeting his first daughter 1.6k | f!reader [ the 141 boys meet his daughter for the first time, definitely a fragile moment of madness - to say the least. ] → working through a miscarriage 1k | f!reader | ⚠︎ [ you and simon lose your baby. ] → family ties 2.3k | ⚠︎ [ in which simon’s son enlists behind his back. ceramics are smashed, threats are thrown and feelings are hurt behind nonchalant expressions. ]
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head-cannons
→ one | two | three | four [ what's swooshing around my brain surrounding dad!simon. usually at like fucking 1am when i'm on the brink of death. ]
blurb requests
→ his daughter stops making him birthday cards
→ simon comes home to his girls after deployment
→ finding out his eldest daughter has a boyfriend
→ dad!simon on petnames for his girls
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taglist? fill out this form. if you would like to be removed from a taglist, pm me.
requests are also open! here is the info. be aware that with dad!simon requests i’ll only write the ones i feel i’ll be able to depict best. i’m not very good at ooc writing for him! (overly soft, cuddly and attentive) no one @ me.
are you lost? back to main masterlist
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cattythespy · 2 years
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zeltqz · 1 year
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the ask was for a sanzu x fem reader nsfw and they’re both getting high together in the car and they do the thing where they bloke smoke in each other’s most and one things leads to another. But I thought it would be funny of on the middle of their sesh, ran calls and idk you could decide if he answers or not. Lol
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— mile high club
ø contents: smoking, smut, possessiveness, fluff, takeomi slander ish bc i hate the mf, friends to lovers, mutual oblivious pining, akashi brothers' mentioned beefing
o word count : 7.1k.
ø notes: is it even a sanzu fic if i dont include some sort of tension and psychological explanation to do with the neglect he faced from Takeomi? no? ok anyway...
@wenumsmol 🫶🏾
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The sun sets over the streets of Tokyo when you park the car in the garage of the Akashi household, having dropped Haru off at home since you’re now his designated driver because his license got suspended for reckless driving.
“We’re here.” The car shuts off when you turn the key, both hands resting on the wheel like the professional, respectable driver you are. “Now get out of my car.”
Sanzu groans from the backseat, laying flat on his back, hand splayed over his forehead, the cold heat from his hands doing wonders to soothe his burning headache. 
“Oi.” Over your shoulder, you peek at him, fighting the urge to poke him awake. “I said we’re here.”
“I know.”
“ So…get out?”
“I don’t wanna.”
“You don’t—” You bite your words, stopping yourself to give yourself time to take a deep breath, soothing your bubbling frustration before it erupts. “You don’t want to enter your own house?”
He raises a long, slender finger, pointing insistently out the window. You follow his gaze to the back corner of the garage, Takeomi’s bike perched on its stand. 
“Ohhh,” you realise, unbuckling your seatbelt to turn and face him fully. “Well..you can’t avoid him forever.”
He removes his hand from his forehead, eyebrows knitted, forehead creased as he glares at you. “Watch me.”
“I’m serious, Haru.”
“So am I.” He’s sitting up, face stern and serious, you swear his green eyes practically glow in the dark as they catch the edge of the yellow tint garage light. 
When it comes to Takeomi, Haruchiyo mainly plans on avoiding him at all costs, dodging him around the house, wearing headphones at full volume just to drown out the sound of his brother’s voice, not coming back home for days on end, rather spending the night at yours or Mikey’s house.
He’s developed different coping mechanisms : talking to Mikey is a big help, though Mikey isn’t one for therapeutic advice, he’s still willing to lend a helping ear and listen to Haruchiyo rant on and on. It’s not much help though, only hearing responses like ‘ hm ’ , ‘ oh ’, and ‘ah’,  maybe if Mikey has a little energy left in him, he’d nod occasionally, but that’s about as much help as you’d get. 
His second coping mechanism is you,  someone he’d befriended a couple months back and kept you by his side secretly ever since, using you as a personal chauffeur and a therapist, but more importantly a best friend. Someone who’d be there for him without judging him and his dirty secrets; someone who likes to be around him not because they’re scared or intimidated, but because they enjoy his presence. 
He cannot be in the right state of mind when talking to his brother, not wanting to remember their interactions in the morning, so he relies on getting stoned or drunk to wipe his memory. It’s a potentially dangerous mechanism, but Sanzu enjoys the adrealine rush of trying something new, enjoys the out of body experiences, the fuzzy feelings, the wild imaginations and visions that make his world look colourful rather than monochromatic. 
“Haru.” You call his name with that sweet voice of yours, one that makes his heart warm. “You can talk to me about anything, okay? I’m always gonna be here for you.” 
He’s looking down at his lap, mouth twisted in a way he always does when he’s deep in thought. You can’t help but wonder just what’s going through that brain of his, knowing fully that up there is a mess of unorganised feelings and emotions he’d never been able to fully process.
“Haru. Is everything oka—”
“You know what I want?” He cuts you off, changing topics with a bright smile. 
His decision to switch topics isn’t something that offends you, knowing that he takes time to fully open up and you’re willing to wait as long as he needs. “What do you want, Haru?”
“I want weed.”
“There’s no weed, wait. What are you doin—” He moves quickly, his lean body brushing past yours, balancing a hand on your lap for leverage as he reaches inside the glove compartment pulling out his stash. “What the hell! You stashed your crap in my car?!”
“Of course I did.” He cackles at the dumbfounded look on your face, moving to the backseat. “Where else would I put it?”
“Uh—I don’t know? Your room? Anywhere but my damn car! I got pulled over the other day. What if I had gotten caught and they searched my car?”
“Did you?” He shrugs half heartedly, opening the ziplock bag. Almost instantly the car smells of marijuana, your nose wrinkles as you try to process it. 
“Well, no…but that’s not the point!”
“Shhhh,” he shushes you, taking his time to roll his blunt, all the while you’re glaring at him. “Stop pouting. You should be thanking me.”
“For what?”
“This.” He licks the joint to seal it, lifting it towards you like it’s his artistic masterpiece. The smile on his face screams child proud of their school project, diamond scars stretching cutely as his smile only widens. “It’s strong. Try it.”
“It better be.” You snatch it from his hands, holding it between your teeth as you manouevr yourself to the backseat to seat beside him. 
His chin is heavy on your shoulder as he watches you light it, wanting to be as close to you as possible not only to get a whiff of that perfume he loves that you practically drown yourself in, but to see your initial reaction to the weed. 
The smoke burns your throat before you could fully inhale, coughing violently whilst pounding on your chest to ease it. Haruchiyo grabs water from the front, tossing it to your lap as you erupt in a series of coughs. “What is that?” 
“I dunno.” He eyes the joint between his two fingers, looking oddly fascinated by it. “I just heard it was strong.”
“No shit.” It hurts when you talk, still feeling the ghost of smoke searing your oesphagus. 
His spare hand hooks onto your legs, and you yelp as he swings them over on his lap, slender fingers rubbing up and down your thigh as he smokes. “You’ll get used to it.”
“I don’t wanna.” You shift upwards on the seats, sitting on his lap, wrapping an arm around his shoulders to rest your forehead against the side of his face and shoulder. The scent of his cologne is overpowered by the marjiuana, but it’s still visible, dipping your face between his neckline and sighing. “This one is too much.” 
“Are my eyes red?” His jaw moves when he speaks, and it tickles as his smooth skin brushes against your cheek.
It pains you to move from your current position, his warmth and scent are soothing to you, but you shift back, turning the car lights on to see better. The corners of his eyes are red, and he’s struggling to keep them fully open. 
“Yeah, they are.” The urge to brush his cheeks is tempting, and your fingers twitch and hesitate by your side.
“Hey hey, wanna see somethin’ cool?” When you nod, he shifts upwards, his hand grabbing to hold onto your waist to ground you before you slip off his lap. 
The sudden contact had you stiffening, blood roaring in your ears as his strong hand held your side. You watch him perform a trick, his diaphragm contracting as he inhales, lips pursed as he exhales, several rings of smoke following suit. Your brows raise in surprise, ready to praise him when he sucks it all back in with one huge breath, the rings dismantling in the air. 
He turns back to look at you, chin high in the air, eyes tinted red gleaming as he grins at you, cheerful and animated. You can’t help it, reaching out to cup his soft cheeks with one hand, tracing over the outline of his lips, the shape of his scars with your thumb. 
It’s like he’s frozen stiff as your fingers feel up his face, and he blinks at you as you look at him with those soft eyes of yours. “You’re so cute, Haru.”
His eyes dilate; from the light in the car, or the strong weed you don’t know, can’t tell. What you can tell is that from his silence, his mind is running wild, thoughts bouncing across his brain from left to right, mirroring the way his eyes dart over your face, your lips, and the curve of your nose.
“So are you.” The words spill out from his lips faster than the blush creeps onto his cheeks. He looks away, embarrassed, clearing his throat before smoking from the joint again. “I learnt it from Ran. That useless lazy fucker is sometimes helpful.”
“Ran, huh?” Your fingers find themselves latched to the front strands of his hair tucked into a ponytail, twirling it on your fingertips. “He’s the tall one, right?”
He chuckles, short and amused, voice muffled from the joint between his lips. “All my friends are tall, ya know?”
“Well maybe if you let me around your friends, I’d be able to identify them.”
“You’ll live without ‘em,” he says, blowing smoke in your face, snorting when you cough and swat the smoke away, then try to hit the side of his face, only for him to catch your hand in time. “Your reflexes suck ass.”
You struggle to shift your hand from his grip, frowning at him. “I’m not a ninja.”
“I can teach you to be one.” 
“You a sensei, now?”
“I’m anything and everything. Like Batman.” 
He smiles when you laugh softly, the sound making him feel lightheaded, paired along with the weed flowing through his veins. “Batman is rich, though. You’re not.”
“I can steal money, all is good.” His hand, warm and hot, slides under the hem of your shirt, leaving a searing trail behind his movements that burns into your skin. “I’ll buy you anything once I get rich. Promise.”
He’s been subtly leaning closer as he speaks the whole time, but you don’t notice until his forehead brushes yours and you’re both staring at each other, daring the other to move closer.  “ Anything? ”
Green eyes fall down to your lips, not even trying to look subtle. “Anything.”
Fuck, at this angle you look so pretty, staring down at him with those dreamy eyes of yours, looking at him like he’s the most precious thing in the world. He always feels like that around you, another reason why he loves getting high around you. It forces him to be vulnerable around you, letting the feelings he’s been shovelling down refsurface.
Though it’s risky, and there’s nothing more he fears than rejection, he’s always been a risk taker. You make him feel good with your words, your presence, your voice, the silly moments you two share alone in his car, your room, his room. 
Your lips are what he favours the most on your face, always glossy with whatever flavour lipbalm you wear that day, and he physically fights the urge to kiss them just to guess it. His eyes are drawn towards your lips like a magnet. The way you bite at them when you’re focused, chew on the skin when you’re nervous, lick them when they’re dry, he notices, and wonders how soft they truly are.
“Do…do you wanna kiss me?” Your question catches him off guard, brows knitting in confusion as he wonders if he’s been speaking his thoughts aloud this entire time, but in truth, he’s been making his intentions obvious as he’s been staring at nothing but your lips the entire time.
“Huh? Don’t be weird.” He instantly facepalms himself mentally, fighting the urge to turn back time to take back his words, but it’s too late when your brows rise, lips parting slightly in surprise before looking down at your lap with a slight frown.
“Oh, sorry. That was weird, wasn’t it?”
“It’s fine.” His heart stings in his chest, he can feel it clenching painfully leaving nothing but a hollow feeling in the depths of his stomach when he realises you’re upset. “Why’d you ask that anyway?”
Maybe he can shift the narrative, find out a way to spin the conversation back to kissing. He still has a chance. “Have you never kissed anyone before?”
“I have!” The pout is back on your face, but not from being sad; he can tell the difference, so he sighs in relief. But still…the way your lower lip juts out slightly has him fighting the urge to tug and bite at it. “I’m not a virgin, idiot.”
He doesn’t bother trying to hide the surprise on his face, and you notice. “What? It’s that hard to believe someone would fuck me? Am I that ugly or something?” 
The effects of the weed start kicking in,  now you feel yourself getting emotional over nothing.
“I never even said anything.” 
“You didn’t need to. I’m not stupid, Haru.”
He flexes his jaw as he glares at you, trying to shovel his anger down. The argument is pointless, so he stays silent, bringing the blunt back to his lips. He inhales it for longer this time, and it can’t possibly be healthy for his lungs, but he doesn’t care.
“What time is it?” you ask, and his hand squeezes your waist tighter, stopping you from squirming from his lap.
“Why do you need the time?”
“Because I gotta get going at seven.”
“...why ?”
“Because…” you chirp, shifting to face him with a huge smile on your face, “I’ve got a date.” 
When you bite down on your lip, he can’t even be bothered to look down at it, or notice it. It’s silent in the car as you wait for Haru to be your best friend/wingman that hypes you, ask you for his name, height, age, job, personality, whatever. But he’s silent, face unreadable, and the tension in the car rises thick when he continues to stay silent; your excitement fades along with your smile.
He knows he’s been silent for too long, now everything is awkward, but he can’t find the right words to say. Congratulations? It’s just a date, what do you expect him to do? Find you wedding rings? 
His brain isn’t co-operating either, not in the right state of mind to process his words like a filter, so he says nothing before he says something he’ll regret.
“...Anyway,” you have to choke your words out, refusing to show your slight embarrassment, “hurry up and get high, so I can leave and get laid.”
“I am high.”
“Then I can leave.”
“No, you can’t.” He glares back when you glare at him, but he can’t find it in himself to control himself any longer. Maybe it was a bad idea to get high in a confided space with you, on his lap, with your face so close to his. 
“Why can’t I?”
“...’cause he’s a loser, and you don’t wanna get laid by a loser.”
You snort. “He’s the only loser available, so maybe I do want to.”
“What if…there’s another loser available?” He goes stiff and still when your eyes flick up to his face, looking concentrated at him eye to eye as if you were trying to decipher his words. “Me. I’m the loser.”
“You?” He simply nods and you do the opposite and shake your head. “You’re not a loser.”
“Yeah, I am.” You shift on his lap when he shrugs, leaning his head back against the headrest, and you watch as smoke leaves his lips as he exhales. 
His senses are intensified with the drugs, your fingers tickling their way up his shoulders, along his neck, to behind his head, lacing them between his soft hair. Leaning down, you hold his face in your hands and kiss him.
The moment your lips touch his, he feels like the world paused, and he’s dying to find whoever has control over the remote of his life so they could press play and he could embrace you like he deserves. Or, maybe he’s dying, and whoever is up there allows him to imagine just one night with you before he fades into nothing.
It’s real, all real. The tender slide of your lips against his are real, the sensation of his teeth sinking into your soft plump lips, biting, and nibbling at it is real, the gentle moans he eagerly draws from your lips when his tongue swipes against yours, wet, messy and sloppy is real. 
“Fuck—” you whisper along the swell of his lips, pulling away to examine his face.
He looks gone, shallow half-lidded eyes looking up at you with blown wide pupils, mouth half open as if he’s forgotten how to close it. 
“Haru, you there?” Your knuckle traces along the side of his face, stopping under his chin, lifting it to look up at you.
“Yeah yeah, ‘m here.” 
Your giggle echoes in his ears, and he’s never been harder in his life, cock pressing uncomfortably tight against his pants. “Good, because you look wasted right now.”
“Just, fuck— stop talkin’. C’mere.” He pulls you down for a kiss with a hand at the back of your head, sloppily working his mouth against yours. He tastes like weed, the smell strong but it doesn’t stop you from licking into his mouth, desperate to drive the strong taste away and replace it. 
Big, strong hands wander the length of your back, slipping under your shirt, cold hands hugging you tight, tight to his body that you can’t help but arch into him.
A sound that comes from the inside of the house has you pulling away, turning to face the window, and he trails his lips down the length of your neck. His nose pokes into the flesh of your neck as he sucks deep, red hickeys onto the plane of your neck, breathing heavily as he savours the feeling of your soft feeling of your skin. 
He could get used to this; the weed makes him feel like your skin is ten times softer, or maybe that’s how it generally feels and you’re just perfect, so soft everywhere. 
“Tak—take this off.” The words are lost to your neck as he sucks along the column of your throat, rogue hands wandering along your chest, up your shirt, kneading your tits through your bra.
“Okay, okay, wait —” When you pull backwards, he follows, leaning up from the seat, lips attached to your neck by the hip. “Haru. If you want to see me naked, you’re gonna have to let me remove my clothes.”
“Just…wait a min’ longer…” He sucks harder, and you shudder as shivers race down your body at the feeling of his teeth nibbling at the sensitive part of your neck. When he’s satisfied, he pulls away, admiring his handiwork. “You look so sexy like this, fuck.” He’s tugging your shirt off, throwing it behind you, uncaring of where it lands. 
Warm hands roam your stomach, your sides, sliding up further to wrap around your throat. “So beautiful ‘n sexy, just for me.”
“You already said sexy.” He hums absentmindedly, obviously not paying attention if the way he’s squeezing the fat of your breasts were any indication. 
“You’re sexy times two.” He grins up at you before pulling your bra cup down, and you inhale sharply when it brushes down your nipple. “No, no actually. Times infinity.”
You flush hot at his words, especially when his lips brush against your ears, biting down against the shell. He’s sweating from the heat in the car plus the heat from both your panting bodies. 
“Don’t you think we should—ah fuck—” He tugs you upwards on his lap, your clothed cunt grinding against his hard cock, hands curling into fists behind his neck. 
“We should what?” His musical chuckle vibrates along your ear, sending cold shivers down your spine, forcing you to arch to chase the feeling away. You squeal when he bites down along your ear once more, smirkingpleasantly at the soft, squishy press of your tits against his chest.
“We should go to your room. I mean there’s not much room in here.” Your neck aches from the angle you’re sitting at, neck bent at an awkward angle to avoid hitting the roof of the car. 
There’s not enough space in this crammed car to fit yourself comfortably. Haru, on the other hand, is more than comfortable, seated on the seats like a king that’s blessed the majestic view of your half naked body atop of his. 
“I got an idea,” he says, not giving you a moment to wonder what he’s thinking before he’s lifting you from his lap, plopping you onto the seats. Your forearm darts quickly to cover your chest when he pops the car door open, lips pressed together tightly as he walks to the front seat, yanks the door open without a care and readjusts the seats back, pushing it till there’s enough room between the wheel. “This space big enough for ya?”
You tilt your head past the seat, surveying the space with a keen eye. There’s enough room for you to kneel down and take his cock in your mouth without a fuss or a struggle. A bed sounds nicer though, the thought of sinking into his soft mattress as he fucks you crosses your mind, but it’s overpowered when you remember his siblings are home and you’d rather die than let them hear you.
“Seems good,” you shrug, sliding quickly out the car; the cold air from the garage AC hits you smack in the chest, hardening your nipples momentarily. 
“Ah, ah wait.” Haru pulls you back before you could climb on top of him. The cute way your tilt your head at him, confused, makes his heart do a triple beat for a moment. “I wanna try somethin’.”
“Okay…” 
It’s stressful the way he’s manouevring you along the seat, pressing your back into the front seat as he shifts to kneel between your legs. “Hold your legs up for me.”
You swallow hard, unable to taste your saliva with how fast your nerves are racing. Doing as he said, you bring your hands under your thighs, holding them up as he tugs your pants down, struggling to get them past your bent knees, glaring at you when you choke on your laugh, muttering out a quick apology. 
“Don’t apologise now. You’ll be beggin’ for it later, trust me.”
His confidence is over the roof right now, evident in his strong posture, shoulders back as he leans forward, swiping a finger along your folds with ease. 
“You’re really wet.” Your slick catches on the tip of his finger, and you want to hide your face between your hands when his pink tongue darts out to lick at it. 
“Could you maybe not do that? It’s awkward…”
He hums when he looks at you; now it’s his turn to tilt his head at you. “How else am I supposed to eat you out then?” His hands press themselves between yours under your thighs, and your back aches from almost sliding down the seat in this awkward position. “You want me to skip the prep? Fuck you into the seat right now?”
“I mean—” It sounds like a good idea, but then you remember the length and thickness of his cock through his pants and swallow excessively. “Prep please.”
He smiles at you, the car light reflecting off the side of his face as he dips his face closer, digging his fingers into the swell of your thighs, nose pressed against your folds and sniffs so hard it’s like a vacuum, your clit tingles with the need to have his tongue in you. 
“This gonna sound so weird, but I really don’t give a fuck but…” he moans as he licks along your slit, a long, wet stripe from the bottom to the top, “you taste so good, fuck—”
“Haru stop…” He seals his lips around your clit, fingernails digging into your thighs as he sucks hard, numbing your clit with the continous flicks of his tongue moving at rapid speed. “Oh my go—”
Your hands fight the urge to fly to his hair, pull him closer to grind his nose against your stubborn clit, but you remember his instructions, to keep your hands on your thighs, keep you spread open for him. 
He’s devouring your pussy like a starved individual, flicking his tongue rapidly, slurping the wetness that drips from your puffy folds. You try to close your legs, try to squirm away from the ticklish feeling of his wet tongue trying to squeeze its way through your cunt, but it’s intoxicating, and overwhelming, especially when his finger tickles against your hole.
It’s fascinating watching it go in and out, and Haru dreads pulling his mouth away from your cunt but he needs to watch your face as his finger slides knuckle deep inside you. His bloodshot eyes twinkle as he watches your slick coat the length of his finger, translucent liquid dripping down his knuckles to the seat. 
“You always get this wet?”
“I don’t know…” It’s not often you finger yourself, so the experience is first hand. You’re also partially amazed that your body managed to produce this much slick from a single finger. “Wait, wait, right there. That feels so good—”
“Here?” His finger curls inside you, itching the side of that spongy spot. 
“No, no—not there, wait—” Your hips shift to the side a little, then it’s like something switches inside you, hands shaking against your thighs as he spreads you out with a second finger, applying pressure to that spot that has your moans increasing in pitch. 
His cock twitches with the need to replace his fingers, sink himself deep inside you, watch your eyes cross as you melt in pleasure. He leans forward, slurping, sucking along the sensitive hood of your clit.
Your body feels numb, voice coming out as breathy pants as you tilt your head back to hit the headrest, giving into the warm, fuzzy feeling deep inside your abdomdem as he fingers you to your climax. 
He knows that you're close when your walls cling and squeeze his fingers tight, barely giving him enough room to move them. His own tongue slithers through your folds, lapping up the leftover slick. The taste of you is better than he’d expected, and he thinks he could live between your legs for the rest of his life. 
There’s a swell of pride swirling through his chest when he feels you lose yourself on his fingers and tongue, your teeth pressing into your bottom lip painfully as you jolt and sit up from the effects of your orgasm. Your hands forget holding your thighs up, gripping onto his hair tied up loosely in a ponytail and tug him forward, craving the warmth of his mouth sealed around your clit as your world comes tumbling down.
It takes a couple moments for you to get yourself together, still holding painfully onto his hair before letting go. He presses ticklish kisses along your thighs, licking at the wetness spread along them. 
“That was—” You swallow, trying to find the words since your brain isn’t co-operating. “That was so good.”
You look all cute when flustered, face heated and flushed, your pretty lips left open as you pant heavily, desperately trying to catch your breath. 
“Think I found my new addiction.” He grins up at you, big hands squeezing the fat of your thighs as he kneels up between your legs, wrapping them around his waist and leans in for a kiss.
Your hands cup his cheeks, holding him close to you as he licks into your mouth, forcing you to taste yourself on his tongue, giving you a moment to gather your nerves because you’re going to need it. 
“I’m ready,” you mumble into his mouth, feeling the shiver that races down his spine.
“Bet, okay. Hold on.” He draws back, big hands spreading your thighs apart.
You look at him through your lashes as he sheds his shirt, tossing it behind you. His body is lean, capacious, abs faint but visible and your mouth waters, hand flying out to run down his stomach. Your touch is so light, his muscles flinching away from the ticklish feeling. Everything you do to him makes him feel so good. 
He grips both your hands, pinning them above the headrest. “Keep ‘em there,” he says, unbuckling his belt, sliding his pants down to his knees. He grabs a condom from his back pocket, ignoring your humourless stare.
“You planned this?” You gesture at the condoms with your head. 
“Better be safe than sorry.” He bites the end of the wrapper, pulling the condom out, rolling it slowly down his shaft. 
Your eyeroll is cut short when the tip of his cock angles itself at your entrance. He can see the way you’re dripping, the slick smeared along your thighs. 
Warmth engulfs the head of his cock as he slowly pushes it in you, and he hisses, biting his lip to stop himself from thinking how good you feel, how tight you’re going to squeeze his cock, how he’s going to cum inside you—
You’re panting, the tip of his cock stretching you out, almost screaming when it pushes past, the thick head making you dizzy it carves a path inside you. “Ah, Haru that—” He pushes deeper, and his eyes roll back when you clench around him.
Haru swears, gripping onto the base of his cock, squeezing it to stop himself from cumming too quickly, pushing through the urge to shove the rest of his length inside you. He stills halfway, needing to take a moment to compose himself, his mind fuzzy and warm, and he feels lightheaded. 
He has to close his eyes, knowing if he looks down, seeing his cock between your legs, halfway inside you, he’d cum in an instant. 
“It’s okay, you don’t have to wait—I can take it,” you pant, hips desperately trying to rut forward. “Please…”
He takes a moment to swallow, groaning lowly, as he pushes the rest of his cock inside you, trying to ignore the tight suction of your walls. The moment he bottoms out, he’s falling forward, dipping his face between your neck and shoulder and moans, the sound desperate and needy, causing your pussy to clench and quiver around him.
You wrap your legs around his waist, arms wrapping around his head as you hold him closely, enjoying the feeling of his breath tickling your shoulders. “You okay?” 
It’s funny how you’re asking him this instead of the other way round, and a part of you feels pride in the fact you could make someone this desperate and needy without effort. 
“I’m good…it’s just…fuck , you’re so tight.” He forces himself to inhale deeply, eyes squeezing shut painfully to compose himself. He shivers at the feeling of your nails raking up and down his hair, scratching at his scalp addictvely. “You’re good though, right? It doesn’t hurt?”
You shake your head, smiling softly at him. “Nah. The seats a little uncomfortable but…that’s about it. You can move, Haru.”
“It’s uncomfy? Oh…” You almost want to cry when he pulls out, but he’s lifting you from the seat, switching your positions, slotting you back down on his lap. 
“You want me to ride you?”
He nods, biting his lip when you grab onto his cock, seating yourself down on his cock. 
“Oh my god—” You feel so full, his thick cock stretches your walls, whimpering beside his ear when he rolls his hips sensually, pressing his cock deeper inside you. 
“ Holy shit , you’re so tight.” Your pussy drives him into a frenzy, eyes threatening to roll back at the way your cunt squeezes him so tight, clinging to every inch of him. 
He swears, voice low, sounding wrecked as you begin riding him a little faster, slowly lifting your hips up and down. The obscene squelch of your pussy grasping pathetically around his thick shaft has him biting his lip so hard he might draw blood. 
“ Haru.” You wail his name, collapsing onto his chest, shuddering when his hands, rough and warm, grab onto your hips to slow your pace down. 
“Yeah?” His voice is quiet, like a whisper, so he clears his throat and tries again. “Yeah? What’s wrong?”
“Lemme move—” You trail your lips down his neck in an attempt to soften him, waiting for him to let go of you so you can move faster. There’s a nudging spot inside you, an itch that needs to be scratched. Your attempt to move is shut down again, frustration building up and up the longer you feel his cock twitch inside you. “Haru please…”
“If I let go, you gotta promise to take it slow.”
“But I wanna make you feel good.” You whisper along his lips, tugging at it with your teeth. He groans into your mouth, and shifts for a moment, his cock follows suit, twitching desperately for some friction. “Wait, do that again.”
“This?” He rolls his hips upwards, rolls your hips backwards and forwards, and you drip a little wetter down his leg, wetting his thighs. 
“Yes. Do it again.” 
He starts a steady pace, steady enough for you to feel the way he’s deliberately aiming at that spot in you that makes you squirm around. 
“I’m so close.” He says beside your ear, his voice lingering in your head, clouded by the feeling of his hands roaming your back, scratching at it with every bounce you give him. 
“Me…me too.” 
He’s tense, gritting his teeth when you clench around him. You shift backwards, unslinking your hands from around his neck to grab at his knees, using them as leverage to support yourself as you roll your hips in circles.
He can feel the energy buzzing between you both, can feel the tingling sensation on the edge of his fingertips, the drugs running through his veins has the regular feeling of sex intensifieid, and he swears he can feel every inch of you. 
Everything is so hot right now, the temperature in the car, the feel of your hands braced against his knees, the way your nails dig into the bone, the way your tits bounce in his face as you fuck yourself on his cock. 
You clench when you cum, and he leans forward suddenly, grabbing your hips to lift you up, slamming you back down with a loud moan, hips jerking as he cums inside you. 
You’re shaking, trembling at the feeling of his cum spurting inside you, the wet sensation is ticklish, cold shivers running down your spine. 
“You feel so fuckin’ good,” he mumbles again, holding you down to feel your greedy walls sucking him in further. “Holy fuck, I could stay here forever.”
“I need a shower.” You say once you come back to your senses, groaning softly when you lift yourself up and off his cock, the wet squelch following after echoes throughout the car. 
“That’s so hot.” He mutters, eyes wide with fascincation as he reaches out to thumb at your clit, enjoying the way you shiver and let out a soft moan as he rubs it in circles. “Holy shit that’s so hot. You’re so hot.”
“I kno—” It’s distracting when you can feel his cum dripping out from you slowly making you lose your train of thought , the drip of it is anticipating until it forms a small pool between both of your bodies. “I know.”
“You hesitated.” 
“I didn’t.”
He removes his thumb, wiping the wetness from it along his tongue, tasting you, and you feel your face flush at the action, burning hot when looks up at you, the corners of his mouth dragging up slowly. “You did.”
“Shut up.” 
Sanzu’s reaching towards the backseat for his stash, and you laugh at how his arm barely reaches it, flailing it uselessly around the air. 
“You’re not gonna reach it, Haru.”
“Watch me.”
He grunts and groans like he’s lifting heavy bricks, and you start to take pity on him. “Dude, just give up.”
“No.”
 If there’s one thing about Sanzu it’s that he’s determined, but not in the way you think. It’s more the stubborn version, always trying to do the impossible, ignoring you when you tell him it’s not possible, then sulks when he fails. 
He clicks his tongue, shifting you down on his lap so he has more room and this time successfully grabs at it. “Told you. Always hatin’ on me.”
You giggle, faint and shrill, leaning forward to rest your head against his shoulder, watching him dug through the contents of the bag, his slender, skilled fingers professionally rolling another blunt. 
It’s silent in the car again, you two both bask in each other’s presence. Both of you refusing to discuss what happened earlier, not sure if those sudden feelings you felt were because of the weed or if there’s something else deep inside, a false truth you’ve refused to make terms with, or shoved them aside for another unknown reason unbeknownst to you.
Your head is racing with thoughts, pictures of Haru wondering where you suddenly felt these emotions towards him came from. The thought of sharing him with anyone else angers you, but it shouldn’t because you’re both friends. The thought of him laying in a car with another girl on top of him angers you, makes you feel bitter and resentment towards this imaginary woman your brain fabricated inside your head.
It’s like your body is working against you. 
Stupid weed. 
Haru’s gone for the second time today, and for the first time in what felt like ten minutes—in actuality it was only three—you look up at him. He looks like he’s falling asleep, those chubby cheeks of his so promising, so soft, you can’t help but shift upwards, pressing soft kisses against them.
It should be weird to him  that he doesn’t question your sudden out of character movements, but then again you both did just have sex not longer than five minutes ago. 
His phone rings at the backseat, pulling you away from his neck where you were sucking fresh purple hickeys onto and he groans when your ass brushes aginst his cock. It’s been slightly hard the entire time, still not over his recent orgasm, but not strong enough to maintain itself to stand tall. 
“What’re you doin’?” You freeze as your hand hovers over his phone. 
“Your phone’s been ringing non-stop. It’s irritating.” The caller ID is Ran, and part of you wants to answer it so you can know what he looks like. It’s been nudging at your brain the entire time, trying to figure out which one of his friends is who, trying to put the pieces of the faceless group of boys together to solve the puzzle. 
“Just ignore it—okay then.” You answer the phone away, turning the camera away from your naked body onto Sanzu’s face. You squirm around, trying to find where Sanzu threw your bra and shirt as the two engage in small talk.
“What do you want?”
Ran snorts on the other end, his voice deep, familiar, and husky. “Don’t needa get all pissy, you big baby. Takeomi wants to know where you are.”
“What the fuck does that have to do wit’ me?”
“Call him, or somethin’. I don’t fuckin’ know?”
Haru sniffs, nose wrinkling when the smoke he blows out invades his nostrils. “Tell him I’m busy.”
“Being a fuckin’ junkie?” Ran snorts, petty and bitterly, voice now laced in sarcasm. “So productive.”
Haruchiyo rolls his eyes at the same time you put your shirt back on, reaching under your shirt to fix the straps of your bra. “I’m doing more than getting high, you slug. I’m with my friend.”
You had tuned out the conversation from the beginning, your main priority being your clothes, but at the mention of ‘friend’, he jostles his leg, catching your attention. “Say hello.”
“Uh…hello?”
“Oh? Who might you be?”
“I’m—” Haruchiyo ends the call before you could even get the first letter of your name out. “What the hell?”
He lazily shrugs, tossing his phone into the backseat without a care. It hits the edge of the seat, before hitting the floor with a mild smack. Two noble fingers grasp at your chin, redirecting your gaze from his probably broken phone to his face. 
The kiss is passionate, and long, his wet slide of his tongue laving itself inside your mouth. Your face grows hot when his lips wrap around the length of your tongue, sucking the moisture from it, replacing it with his own. It’s messy but you don’t care, happily drinking the mixed saliva from his mouth. 
His sharp teeth sink into your lips, stopping you from pulling away, kissing you with fervour as his heavy head spins, and bright flashes of colour appears behind his closed eyes.
“I’m so hungry,” he gasps out when he finally pulls away, wiping the saliva from his mouth with his forearm, giving you back the breath he stole from your lungs with that kiss.
“You want me to drive you to McDonalds?”
He grins up at you, that stupid adorable look on his face that has your heart warming in your chest. “Is this your way of asking me out on a date?”
“It’s my way of forcing some food down your throat before you die of starvation.”
“What if I was thirsty instead?”
“McDonalds sells drinks, dumbass.”
“ Or… ” He places his hands on your hips, pulling you forward on his lap. You yelp at the motion, hands flying to the headrest behind him to stabilise yourself. 
What he’s insinuating is lost to you for a moment, only becoming obvious when his hand snakes down to your pussy, thumb nudging insistently at your clit. His eyes dip down to your chest, your nipples still hard and poking through the thin fabric of your shirt, then drags them back up to your face and smiles.
“You’re so horny.” Your eyeroll is fabricated and fake, part of you deep down wants it too. 
“You like it though.” It’s true, and he knows it too. The defeated look on your face is all he needs to know when he moves to open the car door, nodding his head outside. “Let’s go to my room now.”
1K notes · View notes
jiminjamms · 30 days
Text
sex therapy :: 28. perfect timing
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chapter tags/warnings: therapist! toji. manipulative! naoya. toji defends you. naoya 100% has anger issues. infidelity/adultery. extremely strong language. corruption. family drama.
word count: 3.8k
notes: hugs to everyone! been a while, and my busy days at work (plus straggling mental health) have not been doing me favors. writing, reading, and interacting with you all have been bringing me joy. i spent extra time on this chapter to make this piece what i hoped it would be. enjoy. likes, comments, and reblogs are much appreciated. xoxo
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Toji loved working on Sundays.
With his colleagues off, Sundays were the only day in the week when Toji could be the sole person in the therapy office. He appreciated the slowness that came with working on the weekends, allowing him to balance his time for scheduled appointments with unoccupied windows used to strategize and decompress.
He relished in the lull. The tranquility. The peace.
But alas, the serenity was cut short on this particular Sunday, as someone barged through the entrance like a wild boar, causing a rambunctious racket as the front door flung open with immense force.
The doorknob clanged against the wall, and Toji—sitting behind the reception counter—looked up from a patient file on his computer screen. 
With both curiosity and annoyance, he peered above his monitor. 
The black tips to blond hair. The sharp brown glare. The permanent frown. 
Who else could this have been but Naoya Zenin, presenting himself in the flesh?
The incomer’s expression consisted of nothing but antipathy as he bared his teeth at the doorway, his hands balled into fists by his sides. Based on how he glared upon seeing his older cousin, anyone could safely conclude that this man was beyond livid. 
Must he pester me on the weekend? Toji thought as he mentally shook his head, clucking his tongue faintly in disapproval. He had not seen Naoya ever since his official departure from the Zenin Corporation and household, which was months ago. From his recollection, the manchild before him had a fickle personality, bursting into immature fits that easily made someone younger (like his son Megumi) seem like the actual adult around. 
Given this, Toji legitimately did not understand how you had been putting up with Naoya as your husband. 
As for himself, Toji did his best to ignore the new presence, clicking his mouse as he resumed analyzing the file on his screen. He did not wish to spare a moment longer than necessary tending to the human tornado on his way. If Toji had wanted to deal with Naoya in person, he would have confronted him long ago. Rather, he had decided strategically to watch his cousin wreak havoc from afar to avoid interacting with his burdensome family. Everyone in the Zenin household, except for Mai and Maki, was not worth the aggravation that came with mere association. 
Now, especially with today’s booked schedule, Toji would not be able to make an exception to soothe Naoya’s upcoming tantrum.
On the other hand, Naoya had no better choice than to drag himself to his older cousin’s doorstep.
Had circumstances been any different, he also could not bother to see Toji again. He hadn't talked to Toji in months. Why would he? After many years of neglect and inferiority, Naoya finally achieved everything he wanted. 
Or so he thought. 
This was why, to face his estranged relative again—after recently learning that you had been seeing him for weeks—was a grand ego blow to Naoya, who could not accept the possibility that he was losing his reputation’s very foundation to the man he had envied all his life.
Recognizing the indignation that fumed from the current Zenin heir, Toji seized the opportunity to inveigle his cousin and greeted him with a cheer.
“Good morning!” he beamed, raising his hand in salutation. The scar by his lips flexed from his grin. “Do you have an appointment?”
Naoya scowled awfully.
"Great to finally see you again, Toji Zenin."
Immediately, the said man’s smile fell at his cousin's overly casual tone. "Woah, there,” he shot back. “Show some respect, will you? First, my last name is Fushiguro. Do not refer to me as Zenin. Second, calling me by my first name is bad manners. I'm older than you, kid."
Without question, the comment irked the blonde. Of all people in the universe, this was Naoya Zenin in question, a hubristic man who hated humiliation and the need to concede. His demeanor hardened with resentment while he struggled to maintain his composure.
"Fine, Mr. Fushiguro."
Toji quirked another smile.
Theoretically, he had no problem demanding more but decided to be nice by saying, “That’s better.” He locked his computer as he shifted his attention, crossing his arms as his back rested against his chair. “I haven't seen you in a while. Remember the days when you used to work here, too? Good times, hm?" All rhetorical chit-chat and pleasantries and, as expected, there was no response. "Well, I have only a few minutes to spare, after which I have business to attend. So...what brings you to visit?”
Another ironic question, as Toji already knew the answer. 
Over the phone, he had spoken with an irate Naoya who demanded to speak to his wife and have her back home. Despite his insufferable treatment toward you, the Zenin CEO could not stand how his apartment remained empty the past few nights, meaning he hadn’t gotten his dick soaked by his lawful spouse like he should be doing.
But then again, Toji thought, he already has a mistress to satisfy himself with.
Meanwhile, Naoya might as well be digging holes into his cousin’s skull from how his glower fizzed with malice. He opened his mouth, only to promptly purse his lips again to choose his reply carefully. 
“Did you make her see you?”
Quite a question.
Toji blinked rapidly through an empty stare. 
Where did that come from? 
“‘See me?’” he had to clarify.
In one smooth motion, Toji stood from his seat, his chair bouncing back slightly when he did. With his arms still folded over his chest, he meandered around the counter area that separated the client and employee zones in the reception area, stopping mere steps away from the younger man. 
Then, he repeated, “See me who?”
Naoya did not appear amused in the slightest.
His hazel eyes all but narrowed from vexation. The paroxysm of negative emotions on the blonde’s face made him appear ready to snap. Like a button ready to blast everything around him, he was close to letting his wrath take over. “Did you send my wife your therapist information just so that you could talk to her and figure out how to get revenge on me?”
What an oddly specific accusation.
“Why would I do such a thing?” It was more of a statement than a question, and Toji could see how his nonchalance profoundly irritated the other man. “She found me like how all my other therapy clients find me. But me reaching out to her personally merely to spite you? No. That's only some shit you would think to do. Unlike yourself, I'm not that petty."
Toji was blunt in his response, he knew.
In his defense, he would rather cut to the chase than beat around the bush. 
He no longer headed the Zenin conglomerate, but he still had a therapy practice to manage and a family to look after. With his packed schedule, every second mattered and he wasn’t the type to waste his time lingering around and dealing with non-important business matters, such as the grouchy kid with him.
His observations definitely blew a fuse within Naoya, though. 
"Excuse me?!" In two sharp steps, he closed the distance between Toji and himself, jabbing a finger into the other's chest. Bold. “You’re fucked, you know that? You’re so damn fucked," he hissed, and the edges of his mouth contorted into a derisive sneer. “You…You’re goddamn obsessed with Y/N, and you don’t even realize that! Give me a fucking break. You only give two hoots about the bitch because she’s my wife, but you don't actually give a shit about the woman herself.”
At that, Toji immediately swatted the hand from his pec.
“Incorrect, I do,” he retorted, his tone firm. “But do you care about her?” and he didn’t need to hear a response for that one, so he went on. “No, you do not. You know what? I found her situation sad because every time your wife talked about you, she told me about how you neglect and can’t satisfy her. This entire time, I was sorry for her precisely because I know the person you are. Fine, you call her your wife. What that means is she's not just a pussy for you to play with. You can’t just pick and choose different parts of her. But where were you when your wife was crying?” He paused briefly, letting his words sink into his silenced cousin’s head. “Where were you, hm? Where were you when she was upset? Anyone with eyes could’ve seen that she’s been having a hard time! But where?” and Toji gave Naoya one pointed glare. “Where…was her husband?”
In the sheets with an older woman.
Of course, that very husband would not admit that aloud, especially since he had yet to realize that his older cousin already knew about his affair with the other’s ex-wife. Instead, Toji saw Naoya twist his lips into a deeper frown.
“I have a company to lead,” was the excuse he spat out, and he ran both hands through his light strands in evident frustration. “I can’t believe our family thought that you were a capable leader. I, however, saw right through your facades, alright? Despite all your fucking degrees and licenses, you left the Zenin Corporation as a shithole for me to manage.” 
“No, I had set the company to run efficiently,” Toji retorted, keeping his levelheaded demeanor. “You turned the Zenin Corporation into—in your own words—a shithole. You decided to fire everyone I had hired. So currently, your managers are inept, your shareholders are unhappy, your daddy is getting angry, and the most convenient person to blame is me.” He shrugged dismissively. “Rookie mistakes. E for Effort, I guess. Luckily for you, Y/N is a good way to cover up the competence which you lack. Thus, she’s only useful when you deem her as such.”
Naoya scoffed, and his shoulders rose and fell with each enraged breath. “Because you don’t understand what a burden she can otherwise be. Besides, I can treat and use her in whatever way I please!”
He might not display this visibly, but Toji felt disgusted. 
“Don’t talk like you own her. That’s disrespectful. She's a person, not an object.”
"What—" Naoya paused, and his eyebrows creased in annoyance. "Who the fuck do you think you are? That woman is my wife.”
“Then treat her like one,” Toji shot back. While matching Naoya's hostility with his own, he could see the latter's eyes widen at the remark. Not that Toji paid him any mind, and he continued staring at his younger cousin with an unfazed demeanor that showed how willing he was to defend. "She might be your wife, but she is not your property.”
As if Naoya would care. 
Rather, he clenched his hands into tight fists by his sides. “You need to stay away from her. You’ve had your chances with marriages. Y/N is mine and not yours. I swear, if you talk about her with your gross lips again, I'll—" He stopped, as he wasn’t quite sure what would be a good threat. “I’ll—”
“You’ll do what, kid?” Toji interrupted, knowing just how pissed Naoya would get from every reminder of who the older person was and who the actual successor to the Zenin inheritance should be. “I’ll keep her since you can’t. You call her a burden, but I don’t find her to be one. I don’t know about you, but I like her. Have you ever had a civil conversation with her? She's sweet and quite interesting to talk to.”
The continuous comments unsurprisingly make Naoya bristle further.
“I said don’t talk about her like that!” he snarled. “Here you are, bossing me around and telling me to treat her better, but listen to how you talk about the woman! Holy shit, you're such a fucking creep.” 
“Me?” Toji repeated, appalled by his bravery to say those words. “Mind you, boy, she is the one who wanted to talk to me first. As her concerned therapist and the more mature adult, I believe I must listen to her complaints and make her feel better, especially when she keeps whining she’s not being fucked good.”
Naoya breathed heavily, his chest undulating while he boiled with rage. Yet, as the younger, more naive, and less physically adept challenger, he could not make himself fight back against the other man. “You...You don’t know shit, Fushiguro.”
Immediately, Toji arched a brow. 
“Really?" Was that supposed to be an insult? "I don't know shit?" This was hilarious! "Oh, boy. I know a lot of fucking shit alright. About ‘your wife’ or whatever you want to deem her, there is not a single chance in hell that she’d ever think about calling you her husband anymore.”
Naoya stared back, rather stupefied. 
In any other situation, he would simply take the remark as a cheap way to rouse him. Of course, talking about you would be the easiest route to do so. This time, though, Toji’s suspiciously happy visage as he retraced his steps to the counter and positioned himself comfortably against the surface had him uneasy. 
He did not like what the other man insinuated. 
"What...do you mean?" As much as he tried, Naoya could not hide how affected he appeared. “Our marriage is none of your damn business.”
Toji shrugged. "Marriage? What marriage? I don't see the rings on her finger, kid. Heard she tossed them. Apparently, you made her upset enough for her to take them off."
Without a better way to retaliate, Naoya clenched his teeth to signal his displease. “Ring or not, she’s still my wife,” he spat. “Plus, I do not want my wife around a womanizer like you.” 
Instead of taking umbrage from your husband’s words, Toji tossed his head to the side and let out a deep, harrowing chortle. “Wow! You’re one to talk," he rebuked. "The whole household used to joke about how you brought a different girlfriend to each of our family dinners. At the moment, you’re married, and what? You want your spouse to come home, but you then drive her away. You want her to be a good partner, but torment her when she does. Please, you are embarrassing yourself. Why don’t you make up your fucking mind?” With his emerald gaze returning to the younger man, Toji then added, “Now, if you excuse me. My next client is arriving and I have an appointment."
Still, Naoya was not ready to let the conversation end. “We’re not done. You think you’re all ‘high and mighty.’ But, you’re low, Toji. So, so low. Your last wife was a divorcee, and now you’re a motherfucker into married women, huh?” 
"So were you." 
"What?"
"Baby?"
And, in one go, all signs of life drained away from Naoya swiftly at the new voice. 
No fucking way, his expression seemed to read as he craned his neck around in rigid and robotic motions. Naoya had to blink twice to confirm the woman by the door before he placed his arms down and froze.
Mari, who returned the man’s aghast expression with perplexion, had her dark brows crinkled. “What…Why are you looking at me like that?” 
Even with Naoya’s face presently angled away, Toji could see his eyes widen at the ludicrous question. Yet, they both thought the same thing: did she forget where she was?
“What are you doing here? I did not expect you,” she continued. “But, I’m here for an…an appointment.”
Her voice trailed off.
When the woman finally seemed to remember that Toji was also there, her dark eyes rounded in alarm. Wait, her expression seemed to say as she very, very slowly dragged her sights to the man by the counter. Once her eyes met Toji’s, her jaw fell slack before she promptly slapped both hands over her gaping mouth. 
With the two visitors transformed into Medusa's stone statues, Toji took great gratification in the perfect timing. This coincidence far exceeded his expectations because he honestly did not anticipate ever being in the same vicinity as Naoya and Mari, yet here he was. Presented this chance, Toji pushed his bottom lip out in fake thought and furrowed his brows, pointing at Mari then Naoya then at Mari again. 
“Seems like you two know each other?” he asked in mock confusion, his finger swinging between the pair. “How come I didn’t get invited to the party? Has something been going on between my baby cousin and my ex-wife?”
No response.
So, he continued.
“What? Were you two spying on me or something?” (He knew the answer was yes.) “Or…wait,” and his voice dropped to a dangerous low, “Don’t tell me that you two…have been having an affair?”
Naoya—realizing the trap they had been set up in—swung his arm forward, prepared to defend them with whatever good lies he could spin (which Toji knew that he had a talent for), only for the woman to speak up first.
“We’re acquaintances.”
The manner in which Mari snapped caused Toji to pop a brow in surprise.
Oh? he noted. His suggestion on their illicit relationship appeared to strike a particular nerve. Even Naoya could sense the danger in his mistress’s overreaction as his eyes widened in horror. He tried to give her a warning expression, but she failed to see him. 
By the way, did Naoya, know that Mari—well—wasn’t very streetsmart? 
Maybe, but he likely prioritized keeping her in his bed to pay her absent wits any attention.
At this, Toji could not pass on the excellent opportunity to simultaneously provoke the two people who betrayed him. 
“Just acquaintances?” he pressed.
“Yes.” 
In another curt response, Mari pressed her lips into a firm line and shot Naoya a ‘shut the hell up and play along’ look, thinking she was slick when Toji only felt second-hand embarrassment from how utterly blatant the communication had been executed.
Pretending to nod along, Toji added, “Interesting. Because I never knew acquaintances called each other ‘baby.’”
Checkmate.
But the woman must not be thinking, as she sensed her inevitable defeat but hurriedly explained herself by saying, “It’s not what you think, Naoya and I haven’t had sex since—”
“Stop,” Toji interrupted before she could finish her sentence. That statement truly crossed the line. The lady must be inane. To talk about her dirty deeds with his relative as if that was appropriate! Clearly, she was oblivious to common sense and proper etiquette, given how she was desperate to try to save some face, resorting to the most crass justifications as if that would ameliorate the issue. Toji felt ashamed to think that he used to be married to this woman for years. While he noticed a fit of pique boiling within him, he ultimately let the ill feelings go. “I never asked about your sex lives. I don’t want to hear about what you two have been doing.”
Plus, the tabloids have shown him enough already.
Nonetheless, Mari’s face brewed with annoyance. She folded her arms firmly and tucked her chin outward. “Well, if that’s the case, then when and where I’m riding your cousin's dick should not matter!”
“Oh my fucking lord, stop talking already!” and this time, it was Naoya who spoke, shouting into his hands and cupping his face from sheer exasperation. He had been stunned speechless for a while but could no longer contain himself. When he picked up his head, he growled with rage as he raised a shaking finger at the woman. “You,” he seethed. “You’re saying all the wrong things! Holy fuck, bitch, how fucking blind are you? Unbelievable!” He leered to the side as if shaking off part of his rage, only to add on, “Just…Just shut the fuck up!”
The sudden, scathing comments soured Mari's mien in seconds. “Wait, but babe—”
“No.” Naoya cut her off right there. “Don’t ‘babe’ or ‘baby’ me with your bullshit anymore. Can’t you fucking see the atrocities you have fucking committed in the last ten minutes? You’re literally ruining my life! Even Y/N wouldn’t be stupid enough to say all the crap you just said! I should’ve never approached a dumb whore like you.”
While Toji had his eyes widened from silent bewilderment, tears began to roll down the woman's cheeks.
“That’s a lie!” For what must be her first time, she had to face the reality that, despite all the pleasure and company she offered Naoya Zenin after his tough days at work, he was an egotistical sociopath and a married man. "That's not what you've been telling me. You know I’m the only person who can make you happy, not the actual whore whom you have at home! These last few months, you would’ve been absolutely miserable without me!”
“Is that a threat?”
“It’s a reminder,” she hissed harshly. “You had said so yourself.”
At this point, Naoya found himself in the middle of a living nightmare.
To think about his wife who had been avoiding him for days, to see his loathsome cousin watch the scene like this was some sort of Netflix episode, and now to witness his mistress ridiculing him like a fucking fool.
“God dammit!” he roared. With animosity overwhelming his sanity, Naoya—who was already on the verge of destruction—only saw red as he lurched forward. He used his arms to sweep everything, all things, anything he could reach from a nearby tabletop onto the floor: a ceramic vase that shattered into shards, magazines that flew in all directions, a framed photograph that clinked upon descent. He didn’t stop there. Like a mid-tantrum toddler, he kicked angrily at the mess, sending paper and broken pottery flying in all directions without much regret for his actions. 
In fact, this was cathartic for him. Because the very thing he wanted was to make his cousin's world wretched, just like how the latter had done to him. 
“I'm going to find Y/N and bring her back to me, but if either of you…” the blonde warned several moments later, regarding the therapist and the woman with a deathly fire burning in his auburn eyes, “if either of you do more shit to ruin my life in the meantime, I...I will make you regret.”
With that, Naoya stormed off in a huff, releasing all the profanities that have manifested his anger throughout his life. Mari followed soon after, chasing after him in sobs.
Finally, as for Toji, well, he...was stunned.
He blinked thrice in the same second, processing what he had just seen.
He drew in a deep breath...
...and he chuckled.
He knew he looked crazy, laughing to himself in an empty and currently deranged parlor. However, Toji had not felt this triumphant and optimistic in years. He saw a hopeful gleam for himself, for his family, for his colleagues, and for you.
He picked up his phone with a languid grin, scrolling through his contacts and sending over a quick text when he found your name: Guess what?
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end notes: Throughout this fic, Toji and Naoya obviously have a very complicated and terse cousin-ship. For weeks and months, I have been thinking about how to orchestrate this scene, where we see them together for the first time...and with Mari too. Likes and reblogs are appreciated, and let me know in the comments how you all are doing!
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