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illuminatedquill · 3 years

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Extracurricular, An Analysis

Oh Ji-soo and Bae Gyu-ri

“Love is the ultimate outlaw. It just won’t adhere to any rules. The most any of us can do is sign on as it’s accomplice.” - Tom Robbins

You know the story. You’ve heard it before, right?

Boy meets girl.

Girl finds out that boy is running a side protection business for prostitutes.

Girl decides to blackmail boy into letting her join his business.

Classic high school criminal shenanigans ensue leading them into more dangerous situations where they are forced to make desperate decisions to stay alive.

Oh, and they fall in love along the way.

Oh? You haven’t heard this one before? Then let me introduce you to this delightful kdrama called Extracurricular.

I watched this one while waiting for the newest Hometown Cha Cha Cha episodes to drop and ended up binging the whole series in two days. There are many remarkable parts of this series: it’s a crime drama, first and foremost, that showcases high school teenagers caught in a cycle of violence and crime, abandoned by the society and adults that are supposed to be protecting them. There are no clear good guys and bad guys in this drama; everyone is cast in shades of grey. Our main leads, Oh Ji-soo and Bae Gyu-ri, run the prostitution business, and are both from broken family backgrounds. Their actions are morally questionable at best, but the top tier performances from Kim Dong Hee (you might remember him from Itaewon Class) and Park Ju Hyun make you cheer for them anyway. You want them to have a happy ending, despite the horrible things they do. The audience is always reminded that despite how clever they are in staying ahead, their actions have consequences, and they’re just high school kids. The drama never pulls it punches.

But, weirdly enough, it’s also a love story. And that’s the part the really sticks with me until now. (The chemistry between the main leads is absolute dynamite and I could watch ten episodes of them just verbally sparring with each other. They don’t even kiss. They’re that fantastic when together on screen.)

I’m writing this because this is undoubtedly one of my all time favorite kdramas and I have a lot of feelings about our main pairing, Ji-soo and Gyu-ri. I can’t call them a couple (wait, didn’t I just say they fall in love) because their relationship can’t be labelled simply as that. Think of it as something similar to the main leads in My Ahjussi. Two people who should have become soulmates, yet met at the wrong time.

This kdrama is not particularly happy, and while I do encourage people to watch this, I am warning that the subject matter is extremely dark. If you’re sensitive to scenes depicting sexual assault, graphic violence, or anything in that zip code you’ll want to steer clear.

Also, I’ll be diving into spoiler territory in this analysis. So if you want to go in clean, then stop reading here.

Still here? Awesome. Let’s dive deep into the messy, amazing pairing that is Oh Ji-soo and Bae Gyu-ri. First, let’s do a brief character background on our two main leads, starting with Ji-soo.

Oh Ji-soo is one half of our main pairing and this story starts with him. He lives by himself and has been essentially abandoned by his only parents; his father is a failed businessman who gambles whatever money he acquires on scams and his mother ran away. His apartment is small, sparse, but functional. He owns only a few outfits aside from his school uniform. The only unique item he owns is a pet hermit crab that he takes care of. His life outside of school is non-existent; he has no friends, no one to hang out with and do typical high school teenager activities with. He takes care of himself and lives only for himself and his “dream”: to graduate, attend college, get married, and have kids like a normal person.

But to do that, he needs a large amount of money. He has no other financial means to do so (his father is largely absent, as is his mother), so he decides, at some point, to start up this protection business for prostitutes. The drama doesn’t go into detail about the how and why he came to this conclusion that this was the best way to make a lot of money in a short amount of time, so you’ll have to suspend your disbelief from the get go. Considering the themes of the story (how youths abandoned by society tend to act out in extreme ways to make it in this world), it’s not hard to believe his desperation would drive him to make such a decision.

Ji-soo, despite his shady business, is actually a decent person. There’s a streak of humanity that exists inside him that refuses to go out, despite the increasingly dark and bleak events that start to overtake his life. He’s attached to his hermit crab, cares for his “employees” outside of them being tools to make him money, and doesn’t want to see anyone get hurt. He goes above and beyond what’s required to help out people at the risk of his own life (in particular, Gyu-ri, and we’ll get into that shortly).

What we learn from the first few episodes is that Oh Ji-soo is extremely smart and methodical in how he approaches his life. At school, he is known as a model student - quiet, top of the class in terms of grades, doesn’t draw any attention to himself, always follows along with what the teachers ask of him. Only his homeroom teacher, Mr. Cho, seems to consider his quiet style of existence to be concerning and tries to make him less socially awkward by pairing him up with another student in a new extracurricular club. This leads to the introduction of Bae Gyu-ri, Ji-soo’s longtime crush and future partner-in-crime.

Meet Bae Gyu-ri, the other half of our dynamic duo. Her introduction into the story kickstarts the entire plot, as one of her earliest actions leads to a domino effect that spells increasing doom and tragedy for our main leads. She messes with Ji-soo’s operation at a critical moment and she spends the rest of the drama doing her best to make up for the consequences that follow.

In my personal opinion, she is probably the best main female lead I’ve ever seen in a kdrama. Hands down, no other character exists (currently) that rivals her sheer cunning, wit, and badassery. Gyu-ri is Crazy, capital C, and is the chaos to Ji-soo’s control; the fire to his ice. Despite being the direct cause of half the events that happen to Ji-soo in the drama, he can’t help but need her because of what she offers. They make an incredible team. Her competitiveness, her need to win no matter the odds, helps them survive time and time again.

Gyu-ri is from the opposite end of the spectrum of Ji-soo; he’s dirt poor and she’s insanely rich (always nice to see a reversal of typical kdrama tropes). Her mother and father run a successful entertainment company. Gyu-ri is popular at school, friends with seemingly everybody, pretty, cheerful and gets along well with her teachers. Ji-soo, and the audience, believe from the beginning that she has the perfect life. It’s not hard to believe that she’s just involving herself in Ji-soo’s business because she’s bored and needs an outlet, at first.

We soon learn otherwise. Gyu-ri has more in common with Ji-soo than he initially realizes, in that they’re both trapped in circumstances beyond their control - it’s just that Gyu-ri’s cage is gilded, whereas his is not. Her parents are strict and have her life planned out for her, all without her consent or input, leaving her feeling frustrated and powerless despite her rich lifestyle. A suicide attempt hasn’t done much to change her parents attitude towards her, only serving to further their control over her life.

So, when she learns of Ji-soo’s operation she immediately seeks to angle her way into it. First, she tries to rip him off, believing that he’s an evil “pimp” and thus deserves it. But after spending some time with him, she changes her mind last second and decides to help him out instead.

And, now, let’s get into their relationship, which is one of the best (if not the best) aspect in the entire series.

I need to be upfront about something: the relationship between Ji-soo and Gyu-ri is not exactly healthy. I wouldn’t describe it as toxic - the circumstances surrounding them aren’t exactly the best environment to encourage open and honest communication - but it’s definitely not what should be considered ideal, especially for young adults, and especially for young adults who are dabbling in crime instead of studying.

So, why do I love them so much? If you’ve read some of my previous posts, you know that I loathe toxic relationships in kdramas, so I understand if you think I’m coming off as hypocritical here. Why do I like Oh Ji-soo and Bae Gyu-ri when I didn’t like, for example from recent history, (oh boy, here I go again on my Nevertheless BS) Park Jae-eon and Yu Na-bi?

First, Ji-soo and Gyu-ri are way cooler than Jae-eon and Na-bi ever could be. They run a criminal enterprise that involves having a high amount of intelligence, cunning, and daring to do so. Do Jae-eon and Na-bi run a criminal enterprise as a side business? No, they don’t, because they’re boring art students.

Secondly, Ji-soo and Gyu-ri actually progress in their relationship and change their views as they learn from each other. Now, granted, that progress isn’t towards becoming better versions of each other - quite the opposite. But at least they have progress. Jae-eon and Na-bi stayed in the same stupid cycle for the whole series and then decided that it was better staying that way as opposed to trying for something else.

Last, but certainly not least, Ji-soo and Gyu-ri are actually interesting to watch for me. The chemistry between Park Ju Hyun and Kim Dong Hee is explosive and they way they spar, exchange looks, and just generally exist around each other on screen is something I can watch forever. I’ve said this before but Han So Hee and Song Kang’s on screen chemistry, outside of their intimate scenes, really didn’t impress me.

Okay, back to Extracurricular. This relationship, man. It’s all I can think about (other than HomeCha’s Du-sik and Hye-jin, but that’s another post). Ji-soo and Gyu-ri are so good together.

I’ve noted before that Ji-soo is methodical in how he approaches his life; he plans out everything ahead, and rigs any situation as much as he can in his favor. It’s brilliant, but when a crisis happens, he doesn’t know how to deal with it effectively. He panics and flounders; becomes indecisive at a time when clear, decisive action is required.

Enter Gyu-ri. She quickly becomes the partner he never knew he needed. When there’s a situation, she becomes invaluable in her quick thinking and wit, coming up with solutions on the fly. It’s not perfect, but it keeps them just one small step ahead of whatever is coming their way.

The only thing preventing them from becoming unstoppable is the lack of communication and trust they have with each other. A lot of that has to do with how Gyu-ri entered Ji-soo’s business - she blackmailed him first, and, when that failed, she strong armed her way into getting him to accept her help. It’s implied in the drama that Ji-soo has had a crush on Gyu-ri for a while (since ninth grade, I believe) and in the first episode he actually gets the chance to spend time with her outside of school on a sort of quasi-date.

It goes sideways pretty quickly because of some shenanigans from his business, but not before she gets to know him and says some pretty touching words regarding his situation. Poor guy is head over heels - even after finding out that she’s the one blackmailing him, his feelings are only dampened, not extinguished. When he catches a glimpse of her family’s situation, he gains a deeper understanding of her and why she acts the way she does. Even more importantly, Ji-soo treats her the same after finding out this information which, to someone like Gyu-ri, means more than if he comforted her about it.

If you want to see a physical representation of how he feels, other than paying attention to his actions, you can see it in him keeping mementos from Gyu-ri. She has an interesting habit of folding bags into origami shapes and giving it to him. Even after the blackmail reveal, you can see that he continues to keep these in a container on his desk. It’s really cute that he keeps these, when it probably doesn’t even matter that much to Gyu-ri.

Towards the end of the drama, Ji-soo prepares to turn himself in to prevent Gyu-ri from being implicated in the crimes they committed. And it costs him almost everything to protect her. Ji-soo, the quiet, nerdy kid, puts himself on the line time and time again to protect Gyu-ri, knowing that it puts his life and his dream at risk to do so. And all for what? For some girl that he thinks doesn’t even like him in return?

Well, let’s talk about that. Because I’ve seen some comments that Gyu-ri was only using Ji-soo for her own selfish gain. And I can agree that was how it was at the beginning for her; she definitely was only interested in acquiring money, like Ji-soo was, in order to achieve her own goal of being free from her parents.

But, oh man, that is not what is motivating her at the end.

It’s actually pointed out relatively early by some of her friends that it’s obvious that she likes Ji-soo more than he likes her. Understandably Ji-soo is keeping her at arms length from him given the whole recent blackmailing, so it would make sense that it looks that way.

Further questioning reveals what she likes the most about him:

“It’s not like I’m crazy about him. He’s fun. And amusing. He’s smart. And there’s a certain charm he has. He also has a wolfish side to him. But he thinks he’s a puppy.”

- Bae Gyu-ri

But, as she gets to know Ji-soo better, you can certainly see that she starts to fall hard for him. As a cover story for why they hang out so much together during and after school, Gyu-ri states to everyone that they’re dating. The reactions across the school definitely imply that this is a shocking development, which means that Gyu-ri hasn’t dated anyone before. So why Ji-soo other than the reasons she herself states?

He challenges her, just as she challenges him. Gyu-ri may be the more dynamic, quick thinking of the pair but Ji-soo is every inch her intellectual equal - just in different ways. She doesn’t seem to be the type to be easily impressed, but you can tell that she’s definitely impressed by Ji-soo’s operation and how thoroughly set up it is. When Ji-soo is frustrated at the beginning by his setbacks, he blows up at another student (knocks him out in a crazy punch) and immediately walks over to Gyu-ri afterwards (who saw the whole thing) to inform her that she is now his partner in crime.

The look in her eyes, and the small smirk she has speaks volumes about her attraction to him in that scene. Smoldering.

And, oh yes, she’s prone to jealousy. Another classmate, Min-hee, gives Ji-soo a present out of the blue (it was supposed to be for her boyfriend, Ki-tae, but that’s another sub-plot) - all within view of Gyu-ri. It’s hilarious how she tries to brush it off. Later, for plot reasons, Ji-soo has to spend more time with Min-hee which only furthers Gyu-ri’s annoyance.

And her motivations stop being entirely about the money and more towards helping preserve the dream that she and Ji-soo share about being free. There’s a scene in episode 8 where it’s revealed that, due to a business partnership with a local gang (set up by none other than Gyu-ri herself in a desperate move), Ji-soo would have to drop out of school permanently to work on their behalf. Gyu-ri overhears this and, despite badly needing the gang’s help in sustaining their own business, immediately terminates the partnership.

All because it would interfere with Ji-soo’s dream.

Man, if that isn’t love.

In the following episode, Gyu-ri, and later on Ji-soo, is kidnapped by the same gang in retaliation for terminating their partnership. Ji-soo comes to her rescue but Gyu-ri is already almost free (again, she’s really, really badass) and is demanding that they bring Ji-soo to her instead of running for her life.

Surviving this latest attempt puts the two in a reflective, vulnerable mood and Gyu-ri asks Ji-soo why he keeps saving her. Ji-soo asks later on why she keeps risking her life to be with him. They don’t say the answer in words but in an almost kiss (yeah, you read that right - almost).

And then, if you aren’t already convinced, Ji-soo crosses his one last remaining line in an effort to keep Gyu-ri safe; he accidentally pushes a fellow classmate down some steps and, instead of helping her, leaves her to die after grabbing the evidence she has on him and Gyu-ri.

Extracurricular pulls off quite the magic trick here, hiding this well done love story in the middle of a serious crime drama.

The real tragedy is that Ji-soo thinks that Gyu-ri views this whole business, and by extension his life, as one big game. It’s something that she takes offense at, visibly becoming upset when he says that.

But even if that were true, he should be assured since Gyu-ri doesn’t like to lose.

As they hurtle towards the end and face up to the consequences of their actions, Ji-soo and Gyu-ri undoubtedly lose sight of their original goals and dreams. They do some fairly horrible things to stay alive and ahead of the police who are close on their trail. You can’t really blame them for doing what they did; in the face of a society that has abandoned them, what they’re doing is a logical outcome to gain what they want so desperately and deserve so much: the chance to be free to live like normal, care-free people.

I can’t say for certain that they achieve that. The drama is serious in consequences and, at the end, the net around them is drawing tighter and tighter. I won’t spoil the ending scene for you, because I highly encourage you watch this drama yourself but I will say this: Ji-soo and Gyu-ri seem stuck in an impossible situation with nowhere to go, and no one to help them, with a clock ticking down towards either death or discovery by the police.

But, all the same, I’m always the optimist. They’ve gotten through situations like this before and they can certainly do so again. Maybe not as bad as this one, but not too far out of their league. And, like I mentioned before, Gyu-ri doesn’t like to lose. Especially when it comes to Ji-soo.

Their relationship is truly dangerous, as Ji-soo himself notes. Them being together is the source of their problems; they’re too much alike now, as opposed to the beginning of the drama where he stated that they’re too different. Their love is the kind of love where both of them are willing to burn the whole world down if it means keeping each other safe.

I’m a real sucker for those kind of love stories. No one’s a hero here. They’re just kids in high school, doing the best with what they know.

Who are we to judge what is right and wrong? Especially when the one committing the acts are high school kids who don’t know any better and just want to save each other?

Do we have that right?

Do they really deserve that punishment? Shouldn’t we be pointing fingers at the society that forced them to act this way?

Extracurricular really makes you think about that. Is it really so outlandish and terrible what Ji-soo and Gyu-ri do to survive when the adults who are supposed to be protecting them, teaching them better, have failed in their duty?

Maybe they really did win at the end. Not so much in succeeding in their goals but in gaining something that not even regular people are likely to find - a partner, a soulmate, someone who will stand by you no matter what.

If you do watch the ending, and are not an optimist like I am, then all I can say is this: whatever happened, they were together at the end.

They were together.

#extracurricular netflix #human class #netflix #kdrama #oh jisoo #bae gyuri #park joo hyun #park ju hyun #kim dong hee

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here4theheartbreak · 3 years

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Breadsticks & a Boyfriend (kth/jjk)

AO3 Link Here!

Relationships: Jungkook x Taehyung Genre: smut, pwp Final Rating: Explicit Word Count (Chapter): ~3.4k

Tags (more added as needed): smut, PWP, strangers to lovers, rough sex, dirty talk, sex toys, face fucking, coming untouched, shy Jungkook

Summary: When Taehyung took a simple order of pizza, breadsticks, and a soda to a customer on a rainy day, he had no idea how good his tip would be.

A/N: This fic was written for the @bangtanwritingbingo Summer Bingo square Jungkook x Taehyung and also for @venusiangguk who requested TaeKook with prompt #11: “Is it an oral fixation or do you just not want to talk to me?”

The life of a pizza delivery boy was far more interesting than one would think. Though it was a lower end, minimum wage job, for someone like Taehyung, it was excellent. He was a natural social butterfly. Outgoing, bright, vibrant, always seeking to make new friends. This job allowed him to meet a whole variety of people. Who didn’t like pizza? Upper class, snobby elite individuals, right down to the barely surviving folks who managed to scrape together enough for a small delivery once in a blue moon – Taehyung loved meeting them all.

It was a Friday. It was payday. It was a good day. At least, until the clouds rolled in, darkening the sky and bringing thunder. And unfortunate torrents of rain. But a delivery boy doesn’t get a day off, and orders tended to only increase when the weather was this cruddy.

Taehyung didn’t mind. Not really. He could handle a little rain and he had a sturdy car.

The delivery was simple. A large pepperoni pizza, a small order of breadsticks, and a 2 liter of Coke. Simple. Probably a parent with a young child, a college age student, or a babysitter. Should be quick. Probably not a great tip for any of them, but that was okay; he’d had a big delivery to a house party earlier and had made a massive tip… And gotten a cute boy’s number. Taehyung was handsome, so it happened more than one would assume. The jokes about wanting to sleep with the pizza boy weren’t always jokes. Not that he’d ever go through with any of it. It was simple flirtation, it helped with tips. Taehyung figured he’d have to find someone pretty damn special to actually call them back.

The rain seemed to come down harder as Taehyung drove to the address on his GPS. He reached a cute little house with a nicely kept yard. It was a little bit of a walk from where he was able to park to the porch… The driveway would offer a little more protection and a little shorter distance… Normally he didn’t park in driveways; people tended to sometimes get a little angry – but considering the circumstances…

Taehyung pulled into the driveway, nosing as close as he dared to the garage door. He grabbed the pizza bag and covered it carefully with a plastic sheet before pulling up his hood and getting out. He raced from the driveway to the front door, relaxing only when he was safely on the porch. He knocked once, putting on a broad smile.

The door opened a crack, and then a little further, and then all the way. And Taehyung, for what it was worth, forgot how to breathe.

Standing in the doorway was the most stunning young man he’d ever seen. The man was just a little shorter than he was, with shaggy brown hair that swooped down nearly over his eyes, parted enough to peek his forehead. He wore thick silver hoops in his ears, two in his right and one in his left. His plush mouth and round nose matched his face perfectly, and dark eyes drew Taehyung in almost immediately. The man’s beauty wasn’t lowered or altered in the slightest by the fact that he was wearing a sweater and sweats, his feet bare. He smiled softly, his nose crinkling up.

Taehyung beamed. “Hey. Pizza. You’re…” He glanced at the nametag on the receipt. “Jeon Jungkook?”

Jungkook nodded. He glanced over Taehyung shoulder, his small smile drooping. “Come inside,” he said softly, stepping aside.

“Oh, thank you.” Taehyung stepped inside just enough for Jungkook to close the door, and crouched to take out the food. He handed it over to Jungkook quickly. “Pouring out there,” he commented.

“Flooding,” Jungkook agreed.

Taehyung scowled at that. He turned, glancing out the window. As Jungkook had commented, the streets were nearly filled with water, pouring in rivets in certain areas. Taehyung’s body went cold. “Oh God, it got worse.”

“Doesn’t look safe to drive in,” Jungkook muttered.

Taehyung sighed heavily. He turned back and smiled as best he could. “I’m sure I’ll be fine.”

He turned to grab the doorknob, but Jungkook rushed forward, grabbing his wrist.

“It’s a flash flood. News said it was dangerous. You should stay until it’s lightened up.” His voice was soft and timid, barely above a whisper. Either he was terrified, or truly the shiest man in the city. But he seemed genuine in his concern, and Taehyung felt a strange peace come over him at that.

“I’ll call my boss.” Taehyung turned and pulled out his phone, dialing his boss’ number.

“Kim Taehyung! Are you safe? It got so bad out there, I was worried sick.”

“I’m fine. I’m at the last customer’s house.”

“I shouldn’t have sent you out in this mess. Can you make it back?”

“The roads are pretty flooded. I was calling to ask if I could stay out. Until they clear up. I’ll work extra hours tomorrow.”

“Don’t worry about it. Stay safe. Do you know the customer?”

“No, but he’s letting me stay until it clears up. I’ll let you know when I make it home.”

“Thank you, keep me updated.”

Taehyung hung up and smiled. “She’s okay with me not going back. Uh… Thanks for letting me hide out here until the weather lightens.”

Jungkook nodded. He looked down at the food in his hands and turned, setting it on his table. He turned back, chewing his bottom lip.

Taehyung blinked, unsure what to do. He watched Jungkook disappear through a doorway and then return, holding out a paper plate toward Taehyung.

“Are you offering me lunch?” Taehyung asked. Jungkook nodded, pulling open the pizza box.

“Thanks.” Taehyung kicked his shoes off and hung his hoodie before he stepped up, taking a slice of the pizza. “I’m Kim Taehyung.” He stuck out his hand. Jungkook smiled shyly and shook it. He opened his mouth to answer and then closed it, grabbing a breadstick and sticking it into his mouth instead.

Taehyung laughed a little.

He sat at the table, watching Jungkook eat.

“Do you live alone?” He asked. Jungkook swallowed the bite he had in his mouth and nodded, quickly adding more food to his mouth.

Their lunch continued in that manner – Jungkook would answer yes or no answers, always adding food to his mouth, a drink, or biting on something to keep his mouth too full to give Taehyung much of an answer at all. Despite the one-sided conversation, Taehyung was thoroughly intrigued by Jungkook. He wanted to know everything about him. Namely, why he refused to speak.

Despite his quiet nature, Taehyung could feel Jungkook looking at him whenever he looked away. A few times their gazes met, and Jungkook’s was intense enough that Taehyung found himself a bit flustered. For someone who refused to speak, he was certainly showing plenty of interest.

After lunch, Jungkook wandered over to the couch. He looked at Taehyung and patted the seat next to him. Taehyung smirked. He settled next to Jungkook, turning his attention to the television when Jungkook turned it on, flipping through the channels. He picked up the string on his sweatshirt as he did, sticking it into his mouth and chewing gently on it.

Taehyung chuckled a little. He relaxed back against the couch, glancing over at Jungkook every little bit. Even relaxed like this – the boy was stunning. His profile was nearly perfect. He could easily be a singer or a celebrity.

“What do you do for a living, Jungkook?” Taehyung finally asked.

Jungkook looked over, his eyes wide. He dropped the string from his mouth. “I— I’m computer. I program. Computers.” He stuttered.

“Wow, that’s cool,” Taehyung grinned. “You must be super smart, that’s such a cool job.”

Jungkook smiled shyly. He stuck the string back in his mouth, gnawing on it.

“I’m finishing up college myself,” Taehyung continued, looking back at the television. “For photography and media design. I absolutely love art in all forms.”

He glanced at Jungkook from the corner of his eye, catching the other eyeing him up and down. A slow smirk crossed his lips.

“You know, Jungkook… I’ve gotta ask.” He looked back at him and reached out, tugging the sweatshirt string from his mouth. “Is it an oral fixation, or do you just not want to talk to me?”

Jungkook’s eyes widened. He covered his mouth and tilted his head a little.

“No, I—I don’t not want to talk to you. I mean, I—” He squeaked a little, covering his ears.

Taehyung’s grin grew. “Are you really so shy?”

Jungkook lowered his gaze and nodded.

“Well you don’t have to be.”

Instead of responding, Jungkook slipped his finger into his mouth, chewing the skin around the side of his fingernail.

Taehyung reached out, pushing his hand down. He shifted over a little, staring until Jungkook looked at him.

“You’ve been checking me out all afternoon.”

“You noticed?” Jungkook squeaked. His cheeks began to redden in little blotches, chest rising a little faster. “I’m sorry.”

“Why?”

“It’s creepy,” Jungkook muttered.

“I don’t think so. In fact, I’m pretty flattered.” Taehyung reached out, hesitating a moment before touching Jungkook’s cheek with his hand. “Not often a stunning young man looks at me like that.”

“I didn’t mean to…” Jungkook whispered. He looked away, but didn’t pull his face away from Taehyung’s grip.

“I’ve been looking at you too, Jungkook.” Taehyung paused, letting Jungkook look at him once more. When he did, Taehyung continued. “We’re both adults. If you do have an oral fixation… Well…” Taehyung wet his lips, leaving the question unasked.

Jungkook’s eyes dropped down to his crotch, and Taehyung smirked.

“Yeah, that’s what I thought. Is that what you were thinking about?”

Jungkook didn’t answer. He bit on his lips, sucking them in until they formed a fine line. Taehyung pushed a little further, stroking his thumb over Jungkook’s mouth.

“It’s okay if it was. You just need to tell me. So that I know how to respond.”

Jungkook’s eyes widened just enough to be noticeable. He released the grip on his lips, then bit his bottom lip once more, drumming his fingers on his thigh. “What if I was?” He kept the same soft voice, but there was something else. A rough, needy tone that sent the blood straight to Taehyung’s cock.

“I guess I’d have no choice but to oblige your curiosity. I can’t deny a cute boy his wants, now can I?” Taehyung rose. He put his hands on his jeans, hesitating. “Is this what you were thinking about, Jungkook?”

Jungkook nodded, his eyes glued to Taehyung’s crotch.

Taehyung undid his jeans. He could not honestly believe he was doing this. He pushed his jeans and boxers down, letting them pool around his ankles. His cock was already standing at attention, mostly hard at the prospect of having Jungkook in any way.

Despite his shyness, Jungkook responded immediately. He sank to his knees and stroked Taehyung’s cock twice before opening his mouth. Taehyung pushed his hips forward slowly, letting his smooth tip slide over Jungkook’s tongue.

“Holy shit... Suck on it.”

Jungkook’s lips closed immediately and he began to suck, bobbing his head easily along the shaft. Taehyung’s toes curled. He buried his fingers in Jungkook’s soft curls, letting his head fall back. His cock hardened the rest of the way within seconds. Taehyung snapped his hips forward until the tip of his cock bumped the back of Jungkook’s throat. He looked down.

Jungkook gagged once, screwing his eyes shut. Instead of pulling back, he shifted, swallowing the spit pooling around Taehyung’s cock. He moved back a little and pushed forward. Taehyung felt his tip bump his throat again, and the convulsion of his throat, and then it relaxed.

Taehyung shouted when his tip slipped into Jungkook’s warm, tight throat. He began to pump his hips gently, not wanting to hurt Jungkook, but wanting to savor that tight, unique feeling. He pulled his cock free, marveling at how slick with spit it was, shining in the lamplight. Jungkook let his mouth hang open, drool spilling out over his chin and onto his lap. His cock was tenting the front of his sweats obscenely.

“You getting off swallowing my dick, pretty one?” Taehyung teased, slapping Jungkook’s cheek with his cock.

Jungkook nodded. He leaned back, pulling his sweats down around his knees. His cock wasn’t huge, but it certainly was hard, dripping precome the moment it was exposed.

“Can you come from this, sweetie?” Taehyung cooed. He rubbed his cock over Jungkook’s lips.

“Almost,” Jungkook whispered. “As long as I can finger my ass.”

“Do you have toys?”

Jungkook nodded.

“Go put one in for me. One that will help you come. I want you to squirt without touching yourself.”

“Yes, Sir.” Jungkook rose. He tugged off his sweats and rushed off. Taehyung stroked his cock lazily, Jungkook’s spit slicking the way.

Jungkook returned with a thick, curved dildo in one hand.

“Wanna stick it up my ass?”

“I’d love to.”

Jungkook crawled onto the couch. He let his head hang over the edge, and slung his back and hips up the back of it, folding himself up so his knees nearly touched his chest. The angle exposed, and spread, his ass beautifully. Taehyung spit against his hole, smirking when it fluttered and Jungkook giggled.

“I was fingering myself before you came,” he explained. “Just stick it in.”

Taehyung did as he requested, sliding the silicone cock past his tight rim. Jungkook moaned contentedly, his dick dribbling precome onto his upper chest.

“Jungkook...” Taehyung said, nestling the toy neatly between Jungkook’s ass cheeks. “Can you come on your own face in this position?”

Jungkook nodded.

“Let me know when you’re close... I wanna see that.”

Taehyung shifted, rubbing his cock over Jungkook’s lips once more before sliding into his warm mouth. The new angle let Taehyung watch his cock slowly slipping in, each bob of Jungkook’s Adam’s apple as he swallowed, easing the way for the sensitive tip to finally slip into his throat. Despite having been there earlier - the feeling still caught Taehyung off guard. He lightly rested his hand on Jungkook’s throat as he began to pump his hips. Much to his surprise, right at the start of his throat, Taehyung could feel a little bulge on each inward stroke. He rubbed it gently, gasping at the sudden pressure.

“Oh god, I’m really in your throat—“ he panted. He pulled back and Jungkook gasped in a breath. He grinned, his eyes shut.

“Where’d you think I was putting it?” He teased.

Taehyung slapped his bare ass, working the dildo deeper, and Jungkook moaned.

Taehyung slid his cock back into his mouth, gripping the base of the dildo. One hand rested over Jungkook’s throat, rubbing lightly each time he pumped his cock. The other he used to tug the dildo, not enough to pull it free from the clench of Jungkook’s rim, but just enough to tease.

Jungkook moaned around Taehyung’s cock, the wet gulping noises adding to the obscenity - and sexiness - of the situation.

Jungkook’s cock was leaking precome freely, dribbling clear streaks over his heaving, sweat slicked chest. He began to tap Taehyung’s thigh and pointed at his cock.

Taehyung pulled out, and Jungkook moaned loudly. He reached down, holding his ass open further, and pushing his hips up more. His cock twitched and throbbed visibly. Taehyung began to work the dildo quicker, angling it against where his prostate should be. Jungkook’s eyes rolled back.

“Stick it down my throat,” he begged. His voice was rasping and dry. He opened his mouth wide, sticking his tongue out.

Taehyung obeyed, sliding his cock in. Jungkook’s nose nuzzled against his tight, full balls, and he gagged, his cock twitching. Taehyung struggled to hold still as Jungkook began to swallow and moan around him. The squeeze was bordering on uncomfortable, but Taehyung barely noticed. Jungkook was moaning against him, the vibrations tingling up his cock and all the way to his toes. He almost missed the desperate tapping on his thigh for a second time.

He pulled out, and Jungkook jerked hard. He burped, his cheeks pinking up even more, and his cock began to spurt. The first rope landed on his chin, milky and thick. Jungkook tilted his head just enough and the next two spurted into his open mouth. Taehyung went forward, sliding his cock in. The final hot rope streaked over his shaft, making him shudder. He pushed his cock deep into Jungkook’s mouth, feeling the silky slide of Jungkook’s come as it coated his cock.

He began to pump his hips, chasing his orgasm. “Gonna come in your throat,“ Taehyung gasped, holding Jungkook’s head. Jungkook gave a thumbs up, moaning around his cock.

Two more pumps and Taehyung went still, grunting softly. His cock spilled into Jungkook’s throat, milked by the steady swallows, and urged on by Jungkook’s hands on his ass, holding him deep. The orgasm curled his toes, every nerve alight with pleasure. Each pump he knew he was spilling into the delicate, exposed throat of his pretty new friend. Jungkook’s breath was hot against his balls as he struggled to draw in air and not choke on the come. His own softening cock twitched weakly and dribbled onto his chest.

Taehyung pulled out only when he began to soften, and Jungkook shot up, coughing and gagging. Taehyung sat next to him, rubbing and patting his back. He reached up, wiping away some of the stray come and spit streaking Jungkook’s face.

“You okay?” Taehyung worried. Jungkook nodded, clearing his throat. He smiled sheepishly.

“I’m okay,” he whispered, his voice raspy. Taehyung rose and grabbed the cup of soda from the table, bringing it over to Jungkook. Jungkook rose just enough to pull his sweats up before slumping back onto the couch and taking the cup from Taehyung.

Taehyung fixed his jeans, glancing around.

“So that was… Something…”

“Were you pleased?” Jungkook asked softly, staring into the cup.

“Was I—Of course I was pleased, you were great. I’ve never had someone… So happy to do that. Do you really like it when people…”

Jungkook nodded again. “I don’t get the opportunity often. I’m too shy to really make friends, let alone proposition someone.”

Taehyung sat back down next to Jungkook. “Look, we just met… And I didn’t, obviously… Plan for any of this. So, you would be well within your rights to tell me to fuck off…”

Jungkook looked over, tilting his head a little curiously.

Taehyung smiled. “God you’re cute,” he sighed.

Jungkook giggled a little at that, lowering his gaze. “I already sucked your dick,” he said softly. “You don’t need to butter me up.”

“What if I’m buttering you up for something else?” Taehyung asked. Jungkook looked back up.

“Like what?”

“A date.”

Jungkook raised his eyebrows, making them disappear into his shaggy bangs. “A date? W… With you?”

“Yeah, with me. I like you. I want to get to know you better. What do you think?”

“I—” Jungkook seemed to freeze, pinching his lips together in a fine line.

“You don’t have to say yes,” Taehyung worried.

“No, I – I want to. I just… Why?”

“Because I like you.” Taehyung shrugged. “You want to?”

Jungkook nodded.

“Great. Uh… Well, I mean… Obviously I’m already over but… Maybe this weekend?”

“I’d like that.”

Taehyung grinned. He pulled out his phone and handed it over to Jungkook. “Your number, if you’re okay with that?”

“Yeah, of course.” Jungkook took it and typed it in. As he did, Taehyung rose, peeking out of the blinds.

“Looks like the flooding has gone down enough. I should probably get back to my work.”

Jungkook nodded. He rose, fixing his own pants. He handed Taehyung’s phone back.

“Text me so I can get your number… Drive safe, okay?”

Taehyung nodded. He pulled on his jacket and toed into his shoes. Jungkook moved up to him, looking shy once more.

“What?” Taehyung teased.

“Can I kiss you?”

“Can’t get enough of that oral fixation, eh?” Taehyung joked. He reached out, brushing his thumb over Jungkook’s bottom lip. “Of course you can.”

He pulled Jungkook into a gentle kiss, holding him close. It was funny, he realized, as they separated and he hurried out the door to his car. A simple twist of fate – a forced meeting – a simple call for a pizza on a rainy day – could change an entire life.

#thebtswritersclub #bangtanarmynet #networkbangtan #bangtansummerbingo #taekook #smut #jungkook fic #jungkook smut #taehyung smut #taehyung fic #taehyung x jungkook #jungkook x taehyung #jeongguk x taehyung #jungkook x v #kim taehyung #jeon jungkook #mywriting

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alitaimagines · 4 years

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“I’ve always been told, one day I’ll find someone who changes my mind but when they come along, I won’t think twice cause I already good thing with me, yeah I got everything I dreamed.”

note: still looking for more MHA and Haikyuu!! character suggestions!! this is a bit long but I had fun with it so that’s why. if you want another anime with this scenario, dead ass lemme know, I’ll do it.

them seeing you with someone else after your break up:

Sakusa Kiyoomi: you end up with Bokuto

the reason why you probably ended up with Bokuto was because of Sakusa’s germaphobic tendencies.

with Sakusa not really being into going out much, the options of where to go out on dates was v. limited. you would offer to just go to a park and walk around, somewhere in the park that didn’t have a lot of people in the park but he didn’t like the idea and shot it down.

it got to the point where you got tired of him constantly shooting down your date ideas and you were tired of having to bend over backwards for him and just broke it off.

was Sakusa hurt? probably. but you tried to let him down smoothly and even tried to remain friends but he didn’t like that and cut complete contact with you.

a few years passed when you ran into someone at a bakery. he had black and silver hair and the brightest personality you had ever seen. some stuff and things happened and you got his name and number.

Bokuto had told you that he played professional volleyball and your mind immediately thought of Sakusa. you didn’t pay much attention to it so when Bokuto begged you to attend one of his games, he gave you a spare jersey and front row tickets.

the professional volleyball scene was something someone had to experience at least once in their life. the crowd, the players, everything was turned up to eleven and it had been one of the funnest nights you had in a while.

you had waved at Bokuto a few times but Sakusa hadn’t seen the interactions. it wasn’t until after the game when you met up with Bokuto when Sakusa realized everything.

“hey Sakusa, how are you?” you asked him as Bakuto gave you a look, “you know him?” the owl eyed boy asked, “yeah, we dated in high school and bit in college but I guess you can see what happened,” you mentioned.

Sakusa remained silent as Bokuto waved off the small jealousy, “it’s nice to see you again,” was all Sakusa said before heading to go take a shower.

being that Sakusa and Bokuto had their social media accounts, he would see what went on that night and the photos he posted with you. videos of the two of you at a club with a few other players were on Bokuto’s Insta story but he couldn’t say anything. it had been years since the two of you broke up and it wasn’t his place.

did it sting? yeah but what was it to him. he just had to deal that his teammate was now dating someone he once loved and that was that on that.

Haiba Lev: you end up with Kenma

oh, your break up with Lev probably had to do with his modeling career. your schedules didn’t add up and the two of you hardly seen each other. it was a lack of time and it was a mutual break up.

Lev was hurt that you were no longer with him but he understood that his career didn’t make time for you. he was upset and Alisa tried to introduce him to other girls but they weren’t you.

Lev probably thought of you as his first and only love.

as for you. you rekindled your relationship with Kenma out of genuine accidents. you would end up at the same stores Kenma would be at and the two of you exchanged numbers. one thing led to another and he added you onto his team.

the two of you tried to hide the relationship for a while and it worked for a bit but you knew that the relationship was going to get more serious and it was best to rip the bandaid off before it became too late.

the fans of Kenma loved the two of you together. even if you weren’t together, you would end up on his streams every so often and just watch him play whatever game it was while answering questions, giving him playing advice, or even trying to learn how to the play the game he was playing.

one day out of pure curiosity, Lev checked out one of Kenma’s streams. he had a bit of down time and wanted to see how successful his former teammate was.

for a while, the stream was normal. Kenma was playing Minecraft and Lev was engrossed in the stream until he noticed the door opened. the stream went mute until a baby pink gamer chair was pulled up and you sat down next to him.

Lev’s eyes widened as you gave Kenma a kiss and offered him advice on his Minecraft word (I’ve never played it before so ignore my ignorance). Alisa was able to see Lev’s sudden change in mood and looked over to see what caused it. when she made the connection, she sighed knowing her brother was probably going to be upset for a few hours now.

she called off the rest of the photoshoot they were doing and told Lev to head home. all Lev could think of was how you would hold him the way you were holding Kenma. you ran your fingers through his long hair while answering questions from the fans.

Lev knew you weren’t a gamer. he tried to get you to play video games with him but you always denied but as he watched the stream, you would grab the controller from Lev and do something every so often.

fate was a dumb thing, Lev thought. the love of his life was happy in another relationship and there was not a single thing he could do. he knew he could always find another girl but none of them amounted to you.

Kuroo Testurou: you end up with Yaku

this man was a WHORE in college. am I wrong? No. I don’t take criticism. he probably dated you during your time in college and during that time, he thought of you as another fling but that wasn’t exactly your thought on the relationship.

the cause of the break up was probably because he cheated on you. you were done with him and you absolutely disgusted by his actions during your relationship.

the way you dealt with that was by you going over seas to teach. under some odd circumstances, you happened to land a teaching gig in Russia and there you met Yaku. you didn’t have the slightest clue that those two were friends nor did Yaku ever bring it up.

you found it odd how you ended up in another relationship with someone in the volleyball world but maybe that was your type. a relationship with Yaku was completely different than being with Kuroo. he prioritized your relationship and even offered to have you hold some position with the Cheegle’s so the two of you wouldn’t be apart for so long.

you admittedly accepted it and taught the kids of the players who happened to travel along with him. Yaku was over the moon because of it and not even a year and a half in, the two of you married. it was super sudden but you said yes and held the ceremony back home.

because of the ceremony, it was like an unsanctioned Nekoma reunion. Lev, Kenma, Yamamoto, Taketora, and of course, Kuroo attended the marriage. Kuroo hadn’t gotten the fancy wedding invitation with your photo on it but he texted Yaku a few days before for the venue address.

the ceremony was huge but the thing that stopped Kuroo dead in the tracks was the huge photo of the two of you in the front of the venue. it was from your engagement photoshoot and it was like Kuroo’s life had turned upside down. the two of you being together, nevertheless married, was not what he seen coming.

Nekoma players had a table separated for just them and their partners and when you both finally made rounds to thank everyone for coming, your eyes widened at the sight of your ex boyfriend sitting next to Lev. the two of you stare at each other, you with mild disgust and Kuroo with genuine surprise.

the both of you figured it was best not to mention the past between the two of you to Yaku being that it was your wedding and the mention of a past relationship at this point was useless. you put your pride aside and quickly thanked Kuroo for coming to the wedding.

what didn’t stop you was basically showing off your happiness with Yaku. this was your last hoorah before you completely shut Kuroo out of your life for good and made sure to kiss Yaku in the most civilized yet slightly sexual way.

Kuroo was happy for the two of you because he knew Yaku was giving you the life you craved with him at some point. Kuroo was not ready to settle down yet however seeing you happily married kind of kicked him into gear. his bachelor days would have to end eventually and in the back of his mind, he thought that maybe he made a mistake by fully pushing you away.

Oikawa Tooru: you end up with Kageyama

oh how fate worked in such weird ways, right? the two of you went to Seijoh together and when he left for Argentina, the two of you had to break it off. neither of you wanted to do distance and as much as that hurt, you were the one who made the first move and broke it up with him.

Oikawa was BIG HURT but knew this was the right choice. the two of you tried to keep contact with each other but considering he lived and played in another part of the fucking world, the time never worked out and eventually, you both just gave up.

okay so you met Kageyama when played with Schweiden. you were a reporter who happened to oh so catch the eye of Kageyama and he personally seeked you out after every game. what Kageyama thought would be a small fling was actually more of a crush.

Kageyama finally grew a pair and asked you out. the two of you dated for about the time he played for the Adlers and up until he went to play in Italy. he asked you to come with him knowing that you were probably the only one he could ever see himself with and you agreed.

the move to Italy was odd but you and Kageyama made it work. you got to know who his friends were in high school and that’s when Oikawa came up. when you broke the news that you used to attend Seijoh and actually dated Oikawa during your three years. he was admittedly surprised and even though there wasn’t any animosity, a pang of jealousy and hatred was still there and in the end, Kageyama snagged his girl and with that, he was hella proud.

again under weird circumstances, the two of you ended up in Japan for a a volleyball thingy and with that, Oikawa had to be in attendance.

you weren’t harboring feelings for Oikawa anymore and although you were 100% in love with Kageyama, seeing Oikawa made your heart race out of nervousness. you ended up dating his former enemy and you had no idea how he would take that.

after Kageyama introduced you to his former teammates and his best friend, all of you sat down to talk amongst each other. you heard stories on top of stories of how Kageyama was like at Karasuno but what you weren’t prepared for was when you finally met up with Oikawa again.

you and Kageyama were secretly making out in the parking lot after the dinner thingy. he had you pinned up against the car and literally initiating sex right there but what stopped the two of you was the familiar voice to the two of you. Oikawa had sang Kageyama’s name and when Kageyama looked to see his former enemy, Oikawa’s eyes immediately shot at you.

“are you the two of you?” Oikawa asked you as you nodded, “Kageyama and I? yeah, we are,” you replied extremely flustered, “how?” Oikawa asked again.

“we met when I played for Schweiden,” was all Kageyama said before he whispered to you to get in the car. you did what he asked and waved Oikawa off as the two men stared each other down.

no matter how much those two grew up, there would still be that small animosity between them and like Kageyama had previously mentioned, he won Oikawa’s girl and for the moment, Kageyama finally one upped him.

neither of them thought of you as some competition but Oikawa was still kinda in love with you so seeing you nearly having sex with Kageyama so openly, it triggered that small high school feeling.

tsukishima kei: you end up with Nishinoya

an odd pairing?? I know but when I was looking for gifs, those two oddly came up a lot together so I ran with it. okay back to what I was saying, you must’ve dated Tsukki in college, homeboy was not dating during his Karasuno years.

the two of you were probably going really strong together but when an opportunity arose for you to go to Italy to do some interning there, you accepted and Tsukki was less than pleased. he thought it was irresponsible of you to make such a huge decision without his mild input.

that decision caused for the two of you to fight like there was no tomorrow and broke up because of it. Tsukki thought what you did was irresponsible and you didn’t think it was that big of a deal. with that, you left for Italy and had no intention of paying mind to Tsukki or the argument.

you met Nishinoya at a market. the two of you were in the same city as you interned in the same place Noya was fishing for Marlins at. you were picking up a few things for your apartment and your roommate at the time wanted you to get her a fish for her to cook later in the day. when that happened, you caught Noya’s eye and the two of you got to talking.

his vibrant attitude was a complete 360 from Tsukki and even though he wasn’t exactly your type, you gave Noya a chance and managed to actually fall in love with him rather quickly. because of that, Noya managed to keep in contact with Tanaka and he found out. during that time, Karasuno was holding a get together for former players, brought to you by Daichi and Suga.

you thought of the reunion as a way to visit everyone back home while Noya just wanted to see Tanaka and a few others again so the two of you went. again, you had no idea that Tsukki and Noya knew each other and when the day of the reunion came up, the three of you were S H O O K. the entire team was tbh.

Tsukki probably never lost his smart mouth and when he seen that you were with Noya, you were ready to fight the 6′0 man without any consequences when he made a comment in passing. Noya had the mediate the entire interaction and said that the past was the past and you were with him now and Tsukki had no business in something that no longer included him.

in the back of his mind, Tsukki knew what Noya was saying was right but his insecurities and ego wouldn’t let him back down. Noya loved you and although Tsukki was technically his friend, he was going to pick you over Tsukki any day of the week and the three of you probably had to end up being separate tables.

because everyone was of age and there was alcohol being provided, you and Noya def got drunk along with Tanaka and admittedly Yachi and Hinata. the lot of you drank like there was no tomorrow and while Tsukki wanted nothing more than to continue his smart comments, he knew it was best to drop it and watched as you and Noya drank and danced together.

Yamaguchi was able to tell that his best friend was hurting in the inside but he knew if he said anything, he would earn a smart comment. every time you and Noya kissed, Tsukki would make a disgusted face or straight up gag but anyone could tell that Tsukki was HELLA jealous.

finally when the reunion ended, everyone who got drunk got sent to their hotels in cabs as you and Noya were basically blacked out and not even in the right stage to be driving home. you were hanging onto Noya as he placed kisses all over your face while you waited for the cab to arrive.

Tsukki wanted to apologize for his actions but by the time he got to you and Noya, the two of you were already in the cab, probably making out and trying to get home as fast as possible. his mind wandered to the nights where you and him would go home drunk and do exactly what you and Noya were probably planning on doing.

in the end, Tsukki knew there was no chance that you and him would ever become friends and in a way, he liked that. he was glad that you and Noya were living in another part of the world because it gave him enough time to get over you and find someone else. overall, the break up was rough but Tsukki knew that shit happens for a reason and maybe you weren’t meant to end up with him.

Akaashi Keiji: you end up with Konoha

oh boy, this relationship was odd from the start. when you were dating Akaashi, you knew his teammate held feelings for you but at the time, you didn’t pay any mind to him and stuck with Akaashi as you were basically enthralled with him.

the reason for the break up was probably college. both of you went to different ones and you figured it was just more beneficial for the two of you just to end it before anymore feelings got hurt in that process. it sucked but that was just the way life worked.

you ended up meeting Konoha in Tokyo. you both were in the pharma business and worked in the same building, just different departments. you knew that Konoha would befriend you the minute he found out you worked at the same place he did so when you found his office, Konoha fucking ASCENDED when you told him.

that day the two of you went out for drinks and that was assumedly the first date for the two of you. you found it odd how you ended up finding Konoha again but this time, there was nothing stopping from the two of you dating and Konoha made sure that he asked you out as soon as possible.

Konoha and yourself made enough money by working in medicine that the two of you lived lavishly once you moved with each other. the house was placed a few minutes out of Tokyo and the house was big enough to hold a house warming party when it was done getting remodeled and furnished.

you had pushed him to invite a few former Fukurodani members to attend the party and that included Bokuto, Akaashi, and Haruki to which they all came. Akaashi had heard from word of mouth that the two of you ended up together but he wanted to see it to believe it.

when the party came up, you were wearing a dress, pretty tight fitting in the areas you wanted to flaunt and you knew that Konoha was going to have a ball taking the dress off of you when the party was over. plus, Konoha knew how to wear a suit well and you were planning on doing the same thing to him.

as soon as the three Fukurodani members arrived, you sat them at the main two tables and made sure that you and Konoha would sit with them for the dinner. you wanted to catch up with your former friends but you were still a bit awkward around Akaashi.

the awkward atmosphere wasn’t really felt around Konoha nor Haruki or Bokuto but you knew you wanted to get Akaashi alone to thank him for coming and making sure that there was no hard feelings between you, him, and Konoha.

once you were able to get him alone, the two of you talked for a while and chatted about how work life was until Konoha found the two of you. while he trusted you completely, he didn’t have as much trust in Akaashi and decided to stay for the rest of the conversation.

Akaashi understood where Konoha was coming from as he did the same thing with Konoha back in high school but he was already kind of over you and had no intentions of stealing you back. in a way, he liked you and Konoha together. he had no idea why but he did like it.

he watched as you and Konoha would give each other pecks here and there but while he felt a pang of jealousy, ultimately, he wished the next time he seen either of you, he had that special someone in his life. just to show that he had moved on and that the three of you could start becoming friends again.

ALITA

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wrongfullythinking · 3 years

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Twitter and the “Public Forum”

There is a very large looming legal question about whether or not social media sites, such as Twitter, are “Public Forums.” Most would agree that they are not... at least... not yet. But the question is... should they be?

First, a look into why it matters.

In a public forum, all First Amendment protections apply. So you can say any number of very objectionable things (https://scholar.google.com/scholar_case?case=12634874511090553174) and be protected. In a private forum, this is not so. I can kick you out of my house for wearing an Abercrombie shirt, and you have no Free Speech/Expression reason to contest my staggeringly good decision-making.

Second, the public forum cannot be policed for any content that may be stated. This is why if you go to reserve time at a public park, you don’t have to tell the Parks and Rec department what your event is for. Just things like how many people, how long the event will last, etc. This is well-established and well-backed by many years of precedent.

Finally, there is the very serious matter of personal liability. In certain circumstances, officials can be held personally liable if their policies deliberately and knowingly infringe upon Bill of Rights protections (most often First Amendment protections). This means that you could literally sue for the property and assets of a person. (Also, this is why those of us who own either physical property [like a house] or intellectual property [like a book] buy “Umbrella Coverage” from insurances... I recommend State Farm, but that’s totally irrelevant and I’m not getting any kickbacks for that shill =P.)

But hang on... so if the government owns a billboard and rents it out to whomever can pay, can I rent it and post a naked lady?

You could try, and you might win! What you can’t do is post something obscene. And yes, whether or not a naked person is obscene is staggeringly controversial. There’s a 3-part test from the Burger court, a host of vague terms like “average person” and “contemporary community standards,” and “lacks serious artistic/literary/political/scientific value.” And then there are protections for children, a whole separate piece, as well as child pornography, which is always classified as obscene... except when it is not, like in the cases of naked cherubs in church windows. So, confused yet? We’re off topic, but I make this point to explain that even in public forums, where First Amendment rights are fiercely protected, there are still outstanding issues of content censorship.

So, is Twitter / Facebook / Tumblr a public forum?

At this point, the answer is no. They are privately controlled by companies, not owned by the feds or states or local municipalities, and thus can make almost any policy they want. The idea here is that the free market dictates the life or death of these platforms... and that idea tends to hold true! Tumblr itself is a good case-in-point, because it has lost millions of dollars in value due to bad leadership decisions, and at least partially because of censorship. There are countless examples of others... I remember when Yahoo! was the primary search engine of the internet and Xanga was the biggest blogging platform. While you can still Yahoo, I’m not sure there are more than a few hundred people on Xanga, if it still exists in any useful format. So, since places like this are subject to the free market, and thus can die... they should be allowed to make all the good or bad decisions they want about their content. Or at least, that is how the theory runs.

But really... ARE they subject to the market? Now we’re getting into the really interesting territory. If Facebook shut down tomorrow, would it be a problem? Maybe, but life would continue. But if Google shut down tomorrow? Well, millions of schoolchildren are in GoogleClassrooms right now, so that would certainly be a problem. It would at least cause massive disruption... and Facebook shutting down would cause some disruption. Likewise, Twitter controls so much speech that instead of publishing headlines from Newspapers, newspapers publish headlines from Twitter! The 14-year-old looks at that line like “well, duh” and the 44-year old reads that line like “wow, we’ve come a long way,” and the 84-year-old reads that line with just a sad headshake.

So, now we’ve joined one of the most controversial points of the last 20 years... the Fannie Mae “Too Big to Fail” problem. Basically, a set of banks and big mortgage companies (Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac) made a bunch of bad decisions in about 1995 - 2008. [As an aside, whether or not Fannie Mae {technically, the “Federal National Mortgage Association”} is actually a company comes up as an issue... it originated as a government program, but is today a publicly-traded company and has been since the late 60s, though it was delisted from NYSE and is only traded off-exchange]. And the government had to step in. You can read all about that issue at another time, the bottom line is that actually Fannie Mae has paid back more than it borrowed, but there was a ballooning of the debt ceiling by over 800 billion. Some people care about the national debt, some don’t, and again, not the subject of this commentary. The point is that it set a very odd precedent, whereas a company could make extremely bad decisions and then the burden would be placed on the taxpayers to fix their decision, because the company itself was a part of so many people’s lives. Would social media fall under this guidance? Unlikely, and I think we would all run from state-sponsored social media... but hey, what do I know.

So... get to the point. Should they be public forums, or not?

My two cents always comes down against censorship, especially censorship by entities that don’t have my best interests at heart... so basically, everybody else. I think that it is so easy to self-censor the internet at the personal end (for example, by installing filters and blocking services for objectionable content), that companies should not be unilaterally making these decisions, especially if those companies want to be venues for mass public communication.

Let’s go with another example... let’s say you wanted to call up your buddy and have a nice long phonesex session. Good for you. Or just chat with them about the latest Dr. Doe video (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QXgT8WXaPUY), because enthusiasm is important. Would you be okay with Verizon telling a robot to monitor your call, and then automatically hang up if you said “penis” too much? Or “Trump”? Or “Black Lives Matter?” What about “Nazi,” “Rohypnol,” “Mary Jane,” “negritos” [I’ve got your back, Mr. Cavani], “snowbunny,” or “Insane Clown Posse”? I think most people would be upset about any of those, and they would rightfully tell Verizon that they will find another provider. So Verizon doesn’t do that, although it could. But Twitter does do that. And the availability of another Twitter is in question. Will something succeed Twitter? Absolutely. But right now, Twitter is under no market pressure, so it is succeeding at taking off its platform any number of conversations that it probably should not be policing.

There’s also a social-justice side of this. So, let’s say that we all decide Twitter is a bad platform and move to something else. And that something else costs us 10$ a month. I wouldn’t notice this fee. Others would. So that’s an access issue. Or, let’s say that some people start migrating to a new platform, and they only tell their friends about it. That’s okay, right? Absolutely... but imagine that college student who is trapped at home in a pandemic right now who cannot get any viewpoints outside of what her parents approved of, and previously used Twitter to explore and challenge her upbringing. If she doesn’t get an invite to the new platform, is she just lost?

And that brings up the Pandemic. Many, many common public forums have been shut down due to the pandemic. This alone has caused serious controversy (see: BLM protests on crowded streets where state governors participated, while those same governors implemented executive orders enforcing 6-foot distancing in churches and stores), so the argument for Twitter censorship “but you have many other public forums!” is tough to substantiate during the COVID-era. And this is a HUGE problem. Historically, taking away public forums is always an early move of totalitarian regimes. Taking away rights to assembly and speech follows soon after. We’re now in Phase 2 there... and our governors keep assuring us it is temporary... while at the same time, encouraging Twitter to take off any viewpoints they don’t like, under the guise of “false or misleading information.” Soon, they start moving into the schools, and that leads to...

SCIENCE!!!

So, to talk about what rigorous debate means, we need to understand a bit about Science. And specifically, the philosophy of science, what scientific discourse looks like, and why review and critique are parts of the scientific process.

Point 1: “Scientific consensus” is hogwash. Yes, we all agree that the Earth orbits the Sun, and the Sun itself moves, but beyond that, there isn’t much scientific consensus. If you see an article that starts with the phrase “Expert say,” you can go ahead and close your browser window right there. The rest is bull****.

Point 2: The limits of science are boundless. Any specific scientific paper is, by necessity and the peer review process, very strictly bounded. “Whether or not a vaccine is efficient” is an entirely different paper than one titled “Whether or not 80-year-olds with lung cancer should get the vaccine,” and both of those are different than “How the US should achieve herd immunity, and if it is even possible for COVID-19 before significant mutations cause current immunizations to be ineffective,” and all three of those are different from “Do we need to vaccinate our cats from COVID in order to reach herd immunity?”

Point 3: There is no “finalized” science. The answers are never finished. What is “cutting edge” science today is out-of-date tomorrow, barbaric and backwards by the end of the year, and grounds for an abuse lawsuit by the end of the decade. The best examples of this are from Psych treatments.

Point 4: I get very worried when anybody starts to censor scientific content... especially those without any qualifications. Okay, so this one is a personal sentence (note the “I”), but I’m going to go ahead and guess that Twitter robots and interns flagging posts don’t have any idea the difference between sensitivity and specificity, the background as to why the FDA has never approved an mRNA vaccine previously, the difference between statistical and clinical significance, and how to read a limitations section. The people who are qualified to do so are peer reviewers... and in the case where those fail (which happens!), the rest of the writer’s peers. And we do that. Anything published is open to critique, which leads to the final point, that...

Point 5: Critique and Review are THE MOST IMPORTANT PARTS of scientific publishing. If a piece is published without review, it is called an “opinion” and not science. Even more worrisome than the censoring of unpopular papers is the censoring of the opinions of scientists on the papers of their peers. Should someone publish a paper where I believe they overstretched their claims, it is a HUGE part of my job to call that out. For an agency like Twitter to be able to say “you don’t have the right to say that they overstated their claim, because expressing a concern about a vaccine is against our Terms of Use” is a very big problem for science.

The flipside is that you get into the part where now a company can, through its policy, dictate what science gets done. For example, lets say I wanted to examine an unpopular question... and I’m a social scientist, so there are plenty of those, but say I wanted to do something semi-controversial but apolitical. I’ll say my research question is “How do the happiness of those in committed multi-year polyamorous relationships compare to the happiness of people in similar economic and social situations but in closed marriages where additional intimate partnerships would be viewed as grounds for relationship termination?” There are plenty of ways I could conduct this study and I’ll spare you my methodological musings, but safe to say there are platforms who would not want me to publish my results. And that’s fine.

But let’s say that I did publish my results, and a commenter took to Twitter. And their response was “I read your paper, and I see your conclusion that those in committed multi-year polyamorous relationships score no differently on a happiness scale than those in the closed marriages. However, I disagree with your use of this scale, because it was tested on populations of retirees, and most of the people in your sample are in their late 20s or early 30s.”

That is an EXCELLENT and VALID critique. And let’s say that Twitter was heavily into the social justice and had a policy that said “you can’t say negative things about polyamory.” And they deleted this person’s comment. Now, Twitter has interfered with the scientific process. That comment IS PART of the dialogue and that dialogue is part of Science. Yes, there are other places that those comments could be made, and not be censored... but we should not be encouraging that censorship ANYWHERE. And Twitter has vastly overstepped the line on this point. Random Twitter employees have no business removing professional critiques about a study, even if there are other platforms for those critiques.

Other Thoughts

1) Generally, you can’t prohibit meetings in a public forum based on prior behavior. Thus, “X group was violent in the past” is not a reason to prohibit X group from accessing a public forum for speech. So there’s no saying “Proud Boys were violent once, so no Proud Boys on Twitter” if it were to be declared a public forum.

2) I’m really not aware of any large precedents for taking a private company and declaring it a public forum. That may seem redundant (obviously, if there was precedent, this wouldn’t be such a hot-button issue), but it bears specific mention.

#twitter #public forum #legal #science

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taeguboi · 4 years

Text

BTS as... ‘ordinary’ employees

Okay so when I say ‘ordinary’ I mean as in not famous basically. This is more what I just have personally imagined them doing and I think I’ve lost that somewhat ‘realistic’ touch I used to have a few years back when I was more of an avid writer for this blog and could have an idea of their actual personalities, current likes, etc. This is also in no way a reflection of what I think they are and aren’t capable of so please don’t scream at me if your bias has a ‘lower’ role than you might have expected.

Sorry I do like to blabber on before these things, don’t I?

I hope everybody is staying safe anyways and happy imagining!

BTS as... Masterlist here

Pawn Shop Sales Assistant

learning everything about every thing

if you have an object to sell for cash

he probably knows everything about it

or at least like a lot about it

his career is in early days right now

because it’s a family trade

but he learns from the best

but asks not to be favourited over other staff just because he’s the manager’s son

like you know he wants someone to tell him if they think he didn’t get a good deal for that ring

no special treatment please

sometimes uses a bit of the old charm to get a good deal

many girls like that

some of the guys not so much

especially the boyfriends

whoops

meets his wife there

she’s a fairly regular customer

buying good finds from charity shops

or finding stuff in the house

and taking them to the pawn shop to get by and save up a little

they really click

after like the 11th visit he finally plucks up the courage to ask her out

“so, uh... I clock off soon and I was wondering if....

uh....”

and he gets quite flustered because he really likes her

“... would you like to maybe grab a coffee with me?”

and she sort of teases him to fluster him

“I don’t like coffee”

“Oh erm....”

“Just kidding”

and inside he’s like “don’t DO that to me!”

fast forward a few years and he’s got a kid with her

but anyway back to joon as an employee

has many many friends in and around the industry

just people over the years who he’s needed to contact to double check some stuff about an item

sometimes there’s the odd nutter who comes into the shop

like any shop really let’s be honest

but oddly enough, Namjoon has a calming effect on them

maybe he’s just really patient

maybe he has great negotiating skills

but if someone kicks off at one of his colleagues

it’s resolved in under ten - fifteen minutes

he reasons with people who are shocked to find out that their gold isn’t actually real gold

or negotiates with those who thought they had something worth more

or sometimes just has to outright sass back at the aggressive ones

but most people find him to be an agreeable guy

banter with his dad / manage

rand although he gets on with everyone there

there’s that one colleague that just becomes his best mate

and this mate is also in on the banter

but again, there’s no staff feeling left out or not getting the same treatment

it’s a family business

and anyone that helps them along the way is family too

Jin

Sales Assistant

in a big supermarket

stacking shelves

helps customers that can’t reach the higher shelves

such a gentleman

lovely customer service

some wish they could give him a tip

but he wouldn’t take it most of the time even if it was allowed

he doesn’t need to be paid to show basic kindness

it’s just manners really

but he doesn’t fully realise how much he goes above and beyond

very patient at explaining stuff to people

he’ll repeat directions 10 times if he has to

and he helps the elderly make smarter shopping choices

not that his manager knows that though

because he’s supposed to focus on building up bigger transactions

but what can he say

he’s just a people person

empathy and understanding levels are like 1000/10

a good bean

wish you could be served by him all the time

people purposely queue up at his lane when he’s on tills

because he just provides a friendly smile

and pleasant conversation

“how was your day?”

and he’s not saying it because he has to

he’s genuinely interested in what everybody has to say

takes forever but becomes a supervisor

some of his workers often mistake his kindness for dumbness

is that a word, ‘dumb...ness’?

but actually he more than knows what he’s doing

cashes up faster than anyone else ever

has solid ideas to help both business and customer

and whilst it’s a bit difficult getting them out there to higher people

they go for it

from ideas about what customers have previously asked for that the store doesn’t - didn’t - have

to community projects courtesy of tokens from shoppers

even a park that gets set up nearby is named after him

he may seem like just a sales guy to an outsider

but really he’s the heart of the local community

Suga

Tech Support

the funniest you could come across

you know, if you were listening in to the way he deals with some

just pay attention and there won’t be any problems

sometimes he’ll have those days where he’s like

*sigh*

“Have you tried turning it off and on again?”

totally not an IT Crowd reference oops

but seriously that can work like half the time

used to work in some dull office

but took his work to his house

he can basically work wherever and whenever he wants now

as long as he’s got a laptop and a connection

that is the one change he made in his life that made him a lot happier

because although some might turn their noses up to a job like this

it suits him down to the bone

and he doesn’t really care to change career paths any time soon

is up to date with all the tech trends

owns one of everything

well most things

he even has like a drawer of many phones

it’s like a museum of the company he works for lmao

has this spare room that he turned into an office

which definitely could be mistaken for a man cave

the ultimate problem solver

in work and in life

like he can get a phone call about a super complex problem

and he knows what to do just like that

or a mate has a problem with some relationship

and the reply he gives them is just wow

and he’ll have just made their problem sound a lot less stressful or problematic

loves to help people in and out of work

he understands that the people he is helping might be at their worst moment in their work

or it’s an older person desperately wanting to contact family

he doesn’t just solve the technological problems

he calms you at the beginning of the call

he motivates you at the end and wishes you luck

he talks you through the technology in layman’s terms so you can understand what it is you’re doing

and that attitude continues in his social life

he’s the sober friend when you’re crying in the club toilet drunk

he’s the friend that comes knocking on your door because he hasn’t heard from you in a while and he wants to check everything is okay

he will drop you a phone call the day after to see how you’re hanging

or just because

just because he’s an absolute sweetheart

J-Hope

College Tutor

the type that is fairly laid back

but won’t take any shit

so go through your assignment at your own pace

just don’t take the mickey

like he will understand that you might have some personal shit going on

and he’ll extend a deadline under special circumstances

but don’t push your luck by lying to him

happy to have banter with the students

makes lessons fun

but also productive

actually the most productive class(es) of anyone’s day

he’s just one of those tutors you’d love

because he’s engaging

and there’s that one other tutor that no one really likes

because this other guy is boring, dull, basically almost jealous of the students and their ambitions

and although Hoseok won’t say a bad word about his colleague

he can teach you more in half an hour than the other guy does in the entire year

and when you pass the unit he won’t even take credit for the significant part he played

really fucking modest

but he really is one of those teachers that builds lives

keeps quite to himself generally though

has just a small group of friends outside of the college

it’s important to him to keep professional and personal life different

just an overall cool guy

very fair

some say a bit boring

but he’s just sensible really

no one from colleges knows he has a wife

some girls swoon over him and speculate he could be single

and usually he’s oblivious to / ignores any flirting

he’s just here to do his job

he’s here to educate

and he’s here to help you

and he’s happy to help you

Jimin

Dance Instructor

yes, it’s a bit of a typical idea, sorry

but come on

dishy dance teacher whilst you try to learn a style of dance

some students may or may not purposely so bits wrong

because they know Jimin can sometimes be quite physical in his teaching

“Okay, no worries, let’s go back to that bit... It goes like...”

and he’s just behind you to guide you

nice

has his own dance school

holds sessions in the local community centre every weekday night

Monday: contemporary

Tuesday: Street Dance

Wednesday: Musical Theatre

Thursday: Tap

Friday: Ballet

the little un’s are in from 4pm - 5pm

preteens 5pm -6pm

teens / young adults 6pm - 7pm

and finally the adults at 8pm

it sounds like hard work

but dance is all Jimin knows

he’s more than used to is

his stamina is so good

and once his business as a teacher gets up and running

he can afford to put on shows

to showcase all the hard work his students have done

every year, some time in spring

the nearest theatre in town

it’s not as successful as, say, the pantomimes at xmas

but there are plenty of family and friends of the students interested

parents come to watch their kids

adults come to watch their friends

and so on

He has so much faith in everyone

and is proud of every little achievement

at kid’s tap class he’ll be like “wow Sally! that’s amazing! you did a pick up!”

or “keep it going Amanda, you can do it!” at adult ballet

but it’s not just dance achievements he’s interested about

the things you do in your life matter too

sometimes he can be like a therapist

pulls you aside after class if he doesn’t think you were quite as on it as usual today

“are you okay today? you seemed distracted”

yes by your beautiful presence

just kidding

kinda

and you can just tell him

he’s always there to listen if you need to talk about something that you don’t want to tell friends or family

he’s there for anything really

like maybe a teen is struggling with exams

and his encouragement really contributes to them pulling through

“you passed maths! I’m so proud! I knew you could do it!”

and there’s always the big squeezy hug that follows

he loves everyone

everyone loves him

no one can say a bad word about him

like seriously, no one can

Vintage store owner

Tae always wanted to own a shop

ever since he was a kid

he didn’t quite know what it was that appealed to him

but just the idea of running a store that’s your own

that’s the dream he worked towards

ever since school

weekend jobs

errands for neighbours

he saved every penny

and invested it on the cute little building

on the block before the high street

Not like a charity shop

well some of the stock is second hand

but that’s because it’s real vintage

actually not just vintage, further back than that

like some of his stock can be referred to as ‘antique’

anything that has history

everything in his little shop has a story

the decorative chandelier that belonged to a middle class family in the early 1900′s

a vase made in Japan that someone brought back from touring the country years ago

velvet upholstery that could have been part of a noble household in Europe

glassware from the 70′s with intricate design

just cool stuff

you could spend hours in his shop

knows a lot about antiques, collectables, etc

blink and you’ll miss if you want something there

if you see it and you love it the first time you go in

you better buy it

because it’ll be gone even by this evening

his knowledge makes him a brilliant sales person

because the way he delivers the information about an object

just makes you want to buy it

so as you can imagine, sales are always good

everyone within a couple miles radius probably has something in their home bought from Tae’s store

Jungkook

Firefighter

because phwoar

lmao sorry

wait, no I’m not

can’t you just imagine it though

the uniform

the muscles

okay sorry not sorry

a true hero

like sure, all of his colleagues are too, of course

but he goes that little bit extra

takes more risks

he doesn’t let much scare him

passionate about what he does

can mean he gets a bit extra in other aspects of his life

because he knows the dangers of literally anything

like you leave the hairdryer plugged in a few minutes after using it and he’s like

“NOOO!”

*dramatically, almost full takes a leaping dive to get there, unplugs it*

adrenaline rushes

he lives for those

a very can do attitude

feels amazing after rescuing anyone from anything

it could be a cat in a tree, evacuating people in a flood, or a person from a house fire

if he has helped them, it’s all rewarding

just good at everything

the job of course prepared him for lots

but he’s just like REALLY good at everything

first aid pro

ultimate calming skills

navigation and driving - smooth

excellent judgement

even the science behind it all, he knows more than enough

all that jazz

he often gives lessons to younger people

because it’s important that incidents can be prevented

he’s very popular when he makes appearances in schools

because all the girls fancy him

obvs

some guys too hahaha

and I don’t just mean the ones that are quite sure they might be gay

anyways

pretty close to being a real life super hero

like he has to work at unsociable hours

but everyone in the area knows him

there’s hardly a street he walks down without someone saying hello

and even when they’re experiencing some of the worst possible situations

he just brings smiles to people’s faces

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beiingalive · 4 years

Photo

* ⌞ʾ⁎ ⊰ zoë kravitz, nonbinary, they/she/him ⊱ i think i just saw BOBBIE SONDHEIM walk across trafalgar square, singing to TO BE SO LONELY ( HARRY STYLES ). you know, the THIRTY year old LAWYER? people claim that they are just like BOBBY from COMPANY. it must be because they are CHARMING and NONCOMMITTAL as well… though i could be wrong. all i know for sure is that they live at CHICAGO apartment.⌝

❝ they always look like they’re keeping score

who's winning , bobbie ? ❞

name: roberta sondheim. nicknames: bobbie, bob, bubbi, booboo. age: 30. date of birth: october 9th, 1989. hometown: new york city, ny. current location: london, england. apartment: chicago. occupation: divorce lawyer.

pinterest: xx. playlist: xx.

→ 𝕙𝕚𝕤𝕥𝕠𝕣𝕪.

♡ roberta “ bobbie ” sondheim is the first and only child of george sondheim and eileen jones. they were born and raised in new york city , something that is clear the instant anyone meets them — they’re from new york, nothing really interests them. they grew up in a big, beautiful apartment in the upper east side with a lovely view of central park. bobbie’s childhood was uneventful — both their parents worked ( george was a lawyer, eileen a real estate agent ) , so bobbie was raised by several nannies who took care of them when their parents weren’t there — they keep in touch to this day.

♡ bobbie was a few months short of thirteen when their parents announced they were getting a divorce. it wasn’t exactly a surprised — everyone could see the marriage had gone stale. the divorce was mostly amicable — they got joint custody and split up the major holidays. george moved out their home and into an apartment that was just a few blocks away. bobbie’s teens were split in two.

♡ it wasn’t long before both of bobbie’s parents remarried. george fell for a partner at his law firm, katrina — eileen fell for raúl, a recent widower she was helping find a new place. both katrina and raúl had children from their past marriages ( katrina had to boys, both in college — raúl had two girls, ages two and four ). bobbie gained two step-parents and two sets of step-siblings. the’ve never been particularly close.

♡ before and after the divorce, bobbie lived a comfortable life. they weren’t spoiled, but they never wanted for nothing. they grew up with money — bobbie was always aware of their privilege — but they never abused it. they were happy with what they had, they were comfortable. they never demanded more than what they got.

♡ in school, they got along with pretty much everyone. they were popular, but never belonged to any clique — they simply floated between them, being friends with everyone, but never getting too close to any one person in particular. that aloofness got them a lot of attention from boys and girls alike. they dated around, but never really got serious with anyone ( a habit they’ve carried onto adulthood ).

♡ bobbie was a great student without having to put too much effort into it — they coasted through. when the time came to start applying for university, they realized they didn’t know what they wanted. they weren’t passionate about anything. they got good grades and enjoyed most subjects ( except for math ). they were in the debate team, they wrote for the school paper, they ran track. they played tennis, they played the piano, they’d even had a few lines in the school’s production of a midsummer night’s dream. still, there was not one thing bobbie could envision themself doing as a career.

♡ they knew they wanted to leave new york — despite how much they loved the city. living the rest of their life surrounded by their entire family wasn’t very appealing. they decided to move to london based solely on the fact that they’d visited once when they were sixteen on a class trip. this is one of the few solid decisions bobbie has made throughout their life.

♡ at the time, bobbie was dating a fellow classmate — dean wheeler. it was almost serious. they dated for most of their senior year, and even went to prom together. they promised to keep in touch after graduation, but that didn’t really happen. it was clear bobbie had lost interest, and they both just moved on.

♡ bobbie got an english degree while trying to figure out what they actually wanted to do. eventually they decided to study law — their father was a lawyer, so it just made sense. after graduating, they started working at a small law firm and made enough money to buy themselves a nice, comfortable apartment. nothing excessive. just comfortable. they’re pretty happy with where their life is at the moment.

→ 𝕡𝕖𝕣𝕤𝕠𝕟𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕪.

zodiac sign: libra. personality type: esfp — the entertainer. enneagram: type 9 — the peacemaker. temperament: sanguine. moral alignment: true neutral. primary vice: lust. primary virtue: charity. element: air.

♡ bobbie’s a charmer. they can make anyone fall in love with them within meeting them. they’re persuasive and almost always get whatever they want from other people. they’re a fantastic conversationalist, a great listener, and just being around them makes people feel good. they’re very social and can make friends with almost anyone.

♡ people fall in love with bobbie very easily. this is something bobbie isn’t always aware of. the sad thing is that isn’t not always reciprocated. they flirt with everyone ( sometimes without even realizing it ) , even when they’re not interested in pursuing anything.

♡ they can’t say no, so even when they’re not interested, if someone makes a move, they’ll go along with it. eventually the other person will notice and end it.

♡ when they are interested, they’re just not good at expressing it. they don’t know how to let their feelings known when things start to get serious. when it’s time for bobbie to become vulnerable and intimate, they grow distant. they never quite know how to end things, either. bobbie has a nasty habit of letting relationships grow stale and waiting for the other person to do the inevitable.

♡ their relationships often overlap, due to the fact that bobbie is incapable of being upfront with someone they no longer has romantic feelings for, and is also terrified of being alone.

♡ bobbie’s romantic life is a never ending cycle. they flirt with everyone, making them fall in love. they become disinterested, and instead of doing something about that, they wait for the other person to dump them. wash, rinse, repeat.

♡ secretly, they’re a hopeless romantic. they’re scared of intimacy, but they crave it. they yearn for that person who will make all their fears go away. they want to find that person they can be completely open and vulnerable — the problem is they never let things go that far. they get scared when things get too real.

♡ they act like they’re perfectly fine with the way their life is right now — and that’s the problem. everything is fine. just fine. they’re not unhappy, but they’re not completely happy either. they’re just okay. content. comfortable. the crave something more, but they’re too scared to take a risk and do something about it.

♡ romantic disasters aside, bobbie’s a great friend. if you’ve secured their friendship, they’ll never let you down. they’re always just a call away. they’ll make you laugh, they’ll be your wingperson, your babysitter, whatever you need, they’ll never say no.

→ 𝕔𝕠𝕟𝕟𝕖𝕔𝕥𝕚𝕠𝕟𝕤.

♡ FRIENDS: we’re starting out easy here, people. bobbie’s a very friendly person. they can befriend anyone, so this is incredibly open. they’re non-confrontational and a people pleaser, so they’ll get along with anyone. the circumstances of how they met can be entirely up to you.

♡ FRIENDS FROM NEW YORK: bobbie lived in nyc until they graduated high school in 2006. these friends probably wouldn’t be the closest, since bobbie was still pretty young when they left, but it would still be cool to have a couple of buddies from their high school days.

♡ FRIENDS FROM UNIVERSITY: bobbie studied in london from 2006 - 2013 ( approximately, i’m bad at math ) , so these are people they could have bonded with either while getting their english degree or in law school.

♡ FIRST FRIENDS IN LONDON: this could overlap with their friends from uni, since these are the friends bobbie bonded with they they first arrived in the uk and helped them settle in.

♡ FLINGS / FWB / HOOKUPS: this one is extremely open. bobbie flirts with everyone, so the possibilities are endless. your muse could have dated bobbie briefly, slept with them and never got a call back, they could be someone they sleep with casually, or anything else under the sun.

♡ EXES: bobbie’s dated a lot, but they rarely let things get serious ( maybe your muse thought things were getting serious, but those feelings were one-sided ). whether things ended on good or bad terms is totally up to you. bobbie avoids drama at all costs, so chances are they kind of ghosted your muse until they got the message.

♡ ALMOST-SERIOUS EX: this would be someone bobbie could see themselves getting serious with, but never took that step to make it official. they thought about it, but just never had the guts to tell the other person how they really felt. things eventually ended, as usual, and bobbie just moved on with their life.

♡ COLLEAGUES: bobbie’s a divorce lawyer, so your muse could be another lawyer that works at the same firm, someone who’s gone up against bobbie, or just another lawyer they bump into sometimes.

♡ NEIGHBORS: bobbie lives in the chicago building, so if your muse lives there and you wanna say they live right next door, hit me up !

♡ ❝ SOMEONE TO HOLD YOU TOO CLOSE ❞: it’s a cheesy name, i know, let’s move past that. bobbie clearly has commitment issues ( and intimacy issues, and many others that would take too long to list ). still, a part of them longs for that person they can truly be vulnerable with. they want love, they’re just too scared of the sacrifices that come with it. this person is someone who can finally break their shell and make them fall in love. this would obviously develop based on chemistry but i just wanted to throw it up here.

#musicalhqs:intro #→ intro !#( bobbie s. ) / * interactions .#( bobbie s. ) / * texts .#( bobbie s. ) / * muse .#( bobbie s. ) / * aesthetic .#( bobbie s. ) / * visage .#( bobbie s. ) / * playlist .

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talesofpanem · 5 years

Text

Feed the Beast

Author: @hutchhitched

Rating: T for too much angst

Summary: Peeta needs help, and he hates asking for it.

Author’s note: Seriously? Did I just give myself another WIP? Don’t @ me, people. I didn’t mean to.

___________

“This isn’t working.”

Effie Trinket walked into the kitchen, and Peeta, master baker and proprietor of Mellark’s Bakery, released a frustrated little huff. She wrinkled her nose in disapproval, and he worked hard to keep his middle fingers in place instead of flipping them both at her. He knew exactly what she’d say.

Manners, Peeta!

“Well, well, well,” she chirped in her clipped, efficient way. “Things seem to be going poorly for you this fine morning, don’t they, darling?”

“Don’t start,” he snapped and shoved the ball of dough he’d been kneading aside. It wasn’t working. Something just wasn’t right, and he couldn’t figure out what the problem was.

“When are you going to admit you need help, Peeta?” she asked a little more warmly. If he didn’t know better, he’d suspect a small note of sympathy. He hated that with a passion, misplaced sympathy for things that would never be right again.

With a sneer, he responded, “I don’t need help. I’ll figure it out.”

She clucked her tongue and stared at him coolly. “Will you, though? You’re a stubborn man, Peeta Mellark, and, at some point, you’re going to have to admit that you don’t have it all together.”

Beyond frustrated, he wiped his hands on his apron and flinched when the phone rang. He hardly needed anything else to go wrong this morning—not today, not when he only had a few days left, not when nothing was going right.

“Mellark’s. Ms. Trinket speaking. How can I help you?”

She held the phone out to him, and he took it, unsure who was on the other end.

“Mr. Mellark?”

“This is he.”

“This is Mr. Heavensbee, the principal from Panem ISD. I’m sorry to bother you at work, but your daughter…”

“What’s wrong?” he sputtered. “Is she okay?”

“She’s fine, sir. I’m sorry. I should have led with that. Only, she’s feeling a little under the weather. Would you be able to come get her?”

“I…” Peeta started to protest but realized he had no other option. His daughter was sick, and he couldn’t leave her at school where she could infect other children. Besides, if she was sick, he wanted to get her well. It didn’t really matter if he was under a deadline, if his entire life’s work was at stake. He needed to be a dad today, except he really couldn’t. “Yeah, I’ll be there to get her in a few minutes.”

“Thank you, sir. We’ll see you soon.”

Peeta hung up and closed his eyes. He needed a moment to ground himself before he could face the world. How did everything get so messed up in such a short time? Two years ago things had been working exactly as they were supposed to, and now… Now was a certifiable disaster waiting to happen. Like, say, next week.

“Primmy?” Effie asked.

“Yeah,” he sighed and ran his hands through his hair, making it stand on end in short ashy blonde tufts. “She was fussy this morning. I should have known better than to send her to school.”

“But you needed to work,” she offered softly.

“I needed to work. I still do. Need to work. I’m almost out of time.” He fought a rush of anxiety and swallowed hard. He couldn’t afford to lose it. Not now.

“Peeta, let me get you some help.”

He wanted to protest. Everything in him fought to say no, but he was at the breaking point. He couldn’t handle it all, and he wasn’t doing anything very well at this point. It wasn’t working, and he needed that to change quickly. He had to be able to feed the beast.

“Yeah, okay,” he agreed miserably. His shoulders slumped, and tears pricked his eyes for a few seconds before he blinked them away. “I’ve got to go pick up Primmy. Can you watch things here?”

“Go,” she ordered imperiously. “I’ll keep it all going. Who better?”

“Who better, indeed?”

Effie was a godsend—brilliant, efficient, talented, and gifted with the ability to organize anything. If anyone asked him what the definition of administration was, he’d say it was Effie Trinket. Thank all the deities she was on his side.

Thankfully, the drive to the school wasn’t too long, so he didn’t have time to fall into much of a funk. He had a bad habit of sinking into his thoughts and letting them ruin his mood much too often. He was an extrovert by birth—not one who thrived on noise and boisterous behavior, but one who genuinely enjoyed being around other people, getting to know them and discovering interesting stories and experiences each had. Unfortunately, life hadn’t granted him those opportunities lately, and circumstances were such that he rarely had time to socialize anymore. Even his role at work called for isolation in the kitchen rather than interacting with the customers out front. He didn’t want to admit it, but he was lonely, desperately lonely, for good company.

“Hi, Daddy,” his daughter grumbled miserably when he got to the school. Her blue eyes, so like his, gazed at him from a flushed face, and his heart twisted a little.

“Hi, munchkin. Don’t feel so good, huh?”

She shook her head and pouted, her bottom lip trembling. “My throat hurts. And I feel all hot and icky.”

“That sounds terrible.”

“It is. Make it better, Daddy.”

He grinned at her, awestruck again by her spunky personality. In his eyes, she was so much like her mother, but almost everyone said she reminded them of him. He wasn’t sure he’d ever had as much gumption as his six-year-old did.

“Let’s get you home, okay?”

She nodded and nuzzled into his shoulder when he lifted her. She was still so tiny for a first grader, and he wondered if she’d hit a growth spurt soon or remain as small and fragile as her mother had been. He swallowed hard at the thought of his late wife and pushed the memories aside. He didn’t have time to grieve. Besides, he’d already done that. He needed to get home and get back to work.

“Daddy?”

“Yeah, pumpkin?”

“Can I have ice cream?”

He chuckled softly and gazed at his daughter. She knew exactly how to work him, and he didn’t even bother to try to say no.

“Of course, sweetheart, and then I’ll drop you off with Uncle Haymitch.”

“You’re not coming home with me?” she asked, her voice shaky.

He brushed the hair off her forehead and cupped her cheek. “No, honey. I’m sorry. I wish I could, but I’ve got to—”

“Feed the beast.”

“You’re a smart little girl, you know that?”

She nodded and grinned at him. “I do.”

Shaking his head, he turned back to the front. He steered out of the parking lot and toward her favorite ice cream place. Two scoops later (fudge ripple for her, caramel pecan for him) and he pulled into the driveway at Haymitch Abernathy’s house. Curmudgeonly and foul-mouthed, the older man was one of his oldest (and longest-lasting) friends. He hated most people, but he loved Primmy like a pig likes mud—at least he’d said that once.

“Uncle Haymitch!”

“Primmy Mellark! My favorite girl.”

“You always say that,” she giggled.

Peeta caught his friend’s eye and pled silently. Clearly, Haymitch hadn’t checked his phone and seen the text asking for a favor. “Slight fever. Sore throat. It’s just a few hours, I promise.”

“Don’t worry about it. I’ve got her.”

“Can you make sure she eats something besides ice cream? Something healthy, at least somewhat nutritious.”

“I’ll take care of it. A nice nourishing meal coming right up.”

“Thank you. Really.”

“Go feed the beast.”

Peeta swallowed and called to his daughter, “’Bye, Primmy! Love you!”

He felt like he weighed 1000 pounds by the time he returned to his kitchen. Effie had worked miracles in his short absence. Damp towels covered balls of rising dough, cookies cooled on the countertops, and the industrial mixer whirred with another batch of batter. His eyes shone with gratitude, and he briefly considered worshipping at her high-hell clad feet.

“You’re a lifesaver. You know that?”

“I am,” she affirmed and crossed to him. She untied her apron and patted him on the arm. “Your help will be here in thirty minutes. You have time to eat something. There’s a fresh pot of tea ready for you.”

“My help?” he yelped. “Effie, I don’t—”

“You do. We already discussed this. You agreed an hour ago. You do need help. Now, chin up. Smile on. Go eat. No arguments.”

Grumbling, he walked to his office and found a carefully crafted sandwich waiting for him next to a steaming mug of tea. He flopped into his chair and pushed several pages out of the way. Proof after proof. Stacks of them. All of them staring at him, judging him for his inadequacies.

He was so tired. So very over trying to take care of everything by himself and failing. He wasn’t supposed to have to do this alone. He was supposed to have help. She wasn’t supposed to be gone. She was supposed to be his partner. They were supposed to do this together. So many things were supposed to be and weren’t.

Tears pricked his eyes as he stared at the desk. The unfinished cookbook, the working title “Feed the Beast,” mocked him. The sandwich, which should have been scrumptious, tasted like sand, the tea cooled into an unappetizing brown blob as the worries of the world settled on his shoulders and then pressed down so hard it hurt. His chest ached with repressed sobs.

Peeta whipped his head up at the sound of a tentative knock at the door. He scrubbed his face quickly with the palms of his hands and hastily swiped moisture from the corners of his eyes. When he was at least partially composed, he swiveled to face the door and promptly felt like he’d been punched in the gut.

“Excuse me. Mr. Mellark?”

A woman stood in the doorway, haloed by light. He wasn’t sure if he couldn’t actually see her or if his eyes were playing tricks on him, but all he could make out was a silhouette of a petite body, lithe and shapely that made something inside him sit up and take notice.

“Th-that’s me. He. I. I’m yes.”

She moved toward him with an extended hand, and he blinked. Gray eyes, olive skin, dark hair in a thick braid, and a confused expression on her face. He clearly could not have been more of an idiot.

“Okay? I’m Katniss Everdeen. Effie Trinket called me and said you could use some help.”

“I could?” he blurted and blanched at her stricken expression. “I mean, I could! I really could.”

“Yeah?” she asked. When he nodded, she shook his hand. “Great. Then I’m your new chef. When can I start?”

Trying not to sound overly eager and at all insane, he answered, “Right now.”

#tales of panem #talesofpanem #week 18 #nourish #hutchhitched #submission

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the-canary · 5 years

Text

Paris Holds The Key (To Your Heart) - B.B

Summary: An improtu trip leads to something else (Reader/Bucky Barnes).

A/N: this is for @writingsoftheloser writing challenge. This went from focusing one place to both Paris and Versailles, so I hope I can do them some justice. Big thanks and love to @redgillan for her help.

Prompt: French Revolution

Feedback is always appreciated.

It’s weird when Bucky first settles in with the new version of the Avengers, there are still tell-tale things that make him feel out of place compared to all the other new superheroes and their own stories. So, it takes him a bit longer to get used to everything -- he wakes earlier (when he sleeps at all) to take his time in the gym and get breakfast.

It’s quite, and sometimes he gets to run with Steve and others --much to his frustration but delight-- is make breakfast with Sam. However, as the world settles in once more and the Avengers reconnect with the newly formed S.H.I.E.L.D to tackle on the rest of the world, there are more people coming in and out of the compound.

It takes Bucky a good while to get used to everything, sometimes he wakes up even earlier and it’s one of those nights when he first hears it.

This week’s episode is brought to you by...

“Are you sure this is a good idea, Buck?” you frown as he gives you a mischievous sort of grin, though it isn’t reaching his eyes. You are fully aware that the last mission in what used to be Sokovia was hell for him, for both of you actually but you weren’t the former (unwilling, of course) HYDRA agent that had seen files on the kids they had held like Wanda and her brother once.

Some time ago, he would have gone back to the quinjet in silence, strapped in and hung in the darkness of his room for days -- you weren’t sure why but this wasn’t that type of mission or he was being very good at hiding it from you, which he wasn’t.

“I had plans,” he remarks slowly but surely as he stares at the ground. All pretenses falling at your patience, though it had taken time for you to get this far compared to the annoyance you had to meet back in one of the kitchenettes of the Compound, “Got a week free, outside of the whole end of the world deal.”

“Where did you plan on going?”

“France,” he answers back and it makes you pause. Why did he want to go there of all places?

There are a lot of things you want to ask, but Bucky will stay an enigma until he’s ready, so instead, you smile and pat his right hand. It causes him to look at you with a timid smile.

“Well, let’s get you there, old man,” you smile and Bucky smiles softly.

He doesn’t tell you until you are halfway there that he had gotten the break for the both of you, much to your surprise and confusion.

“What are you listening to?” he finally decides to ask a month in of watching the nameless agent as you sit on one of the high chairs. A book and writing set in front of her. The voice of the man is clear as talks about his historical and social facts about the subject.

“Oh, Sgt. Barnes,” you exclaim a little flustered before hitting pause on the broadcast, it’s the only thing that comes close to what he thinks it is, “I’m listening to a podcast called Revolutions.”

“Podcast?” the word sounds strange on the tip of his tongue, though he is sure he had heard Steve and Sam throw it around when it came to something with ‘calming meditation’ and how Steve simply couldn’t get into it, “About war?”

You hum, trying to figure out how to explain it, “Sort of, but not really. More of what lead up to it. Historical, cultural, economic stuff like that.”

Blue eyes keep watch on you, as you swear you’re trying not to fumble right then and there, “I could start it from the beginning if you want?”

“That would be nice,” is all he says, as he takes a seat across from you.

And that’s how you Bucky Barnes came into your life.

The first morning you are confused with what you are supposed to do with your free time. For all your love of anything historical, you didn’t --due to your chosen career path-- really have time to explore the country you were sent to on missions. It was usually the mission followed by immediate extraction and maybe, Bucky knew that.

However, he wasn’t in his room when you knocked early in the morning. Thus, you end up walking around the area where your hotel room is situated. Hotel François was near the central attractions of the city, but near a bit more secluded area near a small park. In your walk (because you totally aren’t checking out the whole parameter), that’s where you find Bucky -- sitting down and taking pictures of the birds surrounding him.

“Bucky,” you want to laugh at the sight of him with so many birds at he throws food from the clear bag at them, “What are you doing?”

He grins before taking another picture and looking up at you. He had probably already known that you were near him. Bucky presses the screen on his phone before responding, “Taking in the familiar sights while getting us some breakfast.”

Bucky motions to the paper bag filled with an assortment of bread alongside two coffee cups before patting telling you to sit next to him as well. You do so and take the cup with your usual order plastered on the white paper cup. You give him a grateful smile, as he goes back to feeding the birds.

“What exactly are you planning for this trip anyway?” you can’t help but ask, as blue eyes meet yours. He seems a bit more bashful than usual for a second.

“‘S was more for you than for me, doll,” he explains as your eyes widen with shock, “And easy break and I know how you always talk about visiting.”

“Bucky,” you feel like your voice is about to crack any moment while staring at his sparkling blue eyes that he thought this much for someone like you, “Seriously?”

“As a heart attack,” he answers back in one of the ways that Peters has taught him how, which causes you to laugh before he goes back to taking pictures of the birds.

“Why are you taking pictures of the birds anyhow?” you question after going halfway through your pastry. Bucky lets out a chuckle before showing you his phone as you see who he has been messaging -- Sam and Clint.

“I didn’t know you were in Paris too.”

You can’t help the chuckle snort that leaves your mouth at the what he has written and while for now, you decide to simply walk around and take in the sights -- you have to admit it is a calm and fun morning with Bucky at your side.

“Why are you so interested in revolutions from centuries ago?” Bucky asks, though the revolution that they podcast seems to be focused on as of recently, it closer to when he was born and went on when he was young, but even then that had been more than 100 years ago.

“Circumstance,” you answer back, looking up from your book about a certain Mexican outlaw, “I wasn’t really in a position to learn about all these things until much later. There’s always something new I wanna learn about.”

Bucky nods, understanding more than you would ever know, before pressing play on the newest episode once more.

Bucky isn’t really surprised by your first choice to visit the following day. It seemed like the biggest tourists attraction in the whole city, aside from a certain Tower but you haven’t said anything about going there.

He watches from a little way back as you jump from room to room, reading and looking into all the details of the paintings in front of you, though your eyes tend to linger a little more on paintings from a certain area.

“James,” you state because you are sure his nickname might draw some sort of unneeded attention, “Come look at this one!”

However, looking at the bright smile on your face with those sparkling eyes, Bucky is sure he had the best seat in the building to see something beautiful right in front of him -- if only he could tell you that to your face.

By now, Bucky is aware that you cling and dig to anything that gets your immediate interest. You go from listening to Revolutions to the creator’s older podcast about Ancient Rome, though he finds you falling asleep from time to time -- you had even bought his book and would’ve met him if it hadn’t been for a last minute mission.

However, there was always one specific part of the podcast that he realized you always went to, regardless of how long ago it had ended. He finds himself asking that question one night, as the podcast moves forward once more talking about Lafayette.

“Didn’t know actually,” you answer with shrug but a light smile on your face, “It just reminds me that there people, besides us, struggling for all this...even if it was centuries ago.”

“You sound like a romantic, doll,” he can’t help but remark, which causes you to let out a soft but awkward laugh.

“I guess I am,” you answer back while touching the back of the spine of the book you were just reading, “But, I think you have to be in this line of work, even just a little.”

You grin at him before calling it a good night, and Bucky swears his heart skips at that moment.

The week quickly passes you by and between “holding hands not to get lost” and an accidental picnic by the river near the Parc des Buttes Chaumont, you aren’t sure how you are supposed to feel about the whole trip. At first, you had thought this whole trip had been about Bucky and he wanted to so in a country he hadn’t seen since the wartime, but everything that he seemed to be up seemed do be out of your dream bucket list.

And while, Bucky was a good friend, you weren’t sure if you were just overthinking the whole situation or if he really was feeling something close to what you had been feeling for over a year now.

There really wasn’t one way to test it out, Bucky was a closed chest and he was even harder to read so instead of letting it bother you more than it should. You decided to ignore it the easier way you knew how.

“Bucky,” you ask him in the early evening, the day before you are supposed to be leaving, “Let’s go get a drink.”

“Anything you want, doll, ” he laughs, though you swear that his eyes linger a bit too long on the dress that you still had from the one mission before this one with Bucky.

However, you remember less from the night than he does as the smell of flowers and fennel along with Bucky’s face when he first takes a sip of the drink are the only real things that pop up in your mind.

You don’t quite remember the magnet (I <3 Paris) you had placed on Bucky’s arm before he had returned to his own room, or how he kissed you softly on the forehead before you passed out completely.

You didn’t know, but Bucky felt just the same as you did for him.

“So, who's your favorite historical figure?’

“Wouldn’t you like to know?”

Despite the minor headache and complaining that you due to get up so early, Bucky has one final stop that he wants to show before getting back to New York. You grab your backpack with a groan and follow out of the hotel, a few blocks down and into a small bus with a light overcast as you slowly make it out of the city.

“Where exactly are we going?” you can’t help but ask 30 minutes into the drive, as the terrain has clearly shifted into something else completely different from the city of lights. However, Bucky just shakes his head and keeps looking out the window, trying to keep his own nerves in check.

“Bucky,” you gasp out as you stare at the familiar golden gate that leads to the much larger gardenscape and building as a whole. Yes, you had always talked about going to Versailles but it always seemed like a pipe dream due to all the work you always seemed to have.

Bucky had heard you talk about it from time to time. He had even sat you watching Marie Antoinette with you, but this whole trip was something completely different and that’s when you knew.

“I think I love you.”

Both of your eyes widen at the sudden declaration, but as you turn from looking at the beautiful piece of history in front of you to the handsome man right across and you can’t help but giggle just a little.

“It would be like to fall for a handsome piece of history, huh?” you state softly, as Bucky cups your cheek.

“It would be just like you,” he answers back as the ride slowly comes to a stop.

And walking through where you are allowed to throughout Versailles is like a dream come true, especially when Bucky won’t let go of your hand the entire time.

And maybe, a few years down the line, you’ll come back to the city -- to look a place you didn’t go to the first time with a lock at hand and complete nervousness over the black vet box you had found by mistake in Bucky’s room a few days back.

“Mon cherie,” it rolls off his tongue easier than the last time, but you can notice that slight quiver in the end. It had taken a long time and a very long road, but you knew him so well.

At that moment, Bucky nervous as hell -- because above all else, he was certain that you were the one that held his heart, all thanks to a podcast and an impromptu trip.

#vi1khistoricalchallenge #Bucky Barnes #bucky barnes x reader #james bucky barnes x reader #james buchanan barnes x reader #bucky barnes fanfiction #james buchanan barnes #james barnes #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes au #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes fan fic #series: short stories #fabiola trying to write

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southside-vixen · 5 years

Text

Fire and Ice (Sweet Pea) 8

Chapter 8. In Your Dreams

AO3

Adrianna Rivera has just made a difficult move from Arizona to the southside of Riverdale. With the history of her life in Phoenix behind her will she be able to find a new family in the Southside Serpents? Or will a certain tall, dark, and rage inducing Serpent cause issues?

The next morning Adria was still wracking her brain trying to figure out what went wrong last night. Tormenting Sweet Pea had always been fun, and easy for that matter. He would get on her nerves and she would return the favor twice over. But last night was different and she couldn’t quite figure out why. Toni hadn’t brought up her exit last night which led her to believe Sweet Pea didn’t say anything about it either.

Then again, why would he?

“You doing okay over there?” Toni asked, her head propped up on her arm. She looked like she was fighting off a hangover, not unlike Adria “You’ve been making faces at the ceiling for a half hour.”

“I’m fine.” She replied, not taking her eyes off the spackled ceiling. She couldn’t figure out why anyone would use spackle. The texture just made the ceiling look pointy and off. “I think.”

“Do you…want to talk about it?” Toni asked, tentatively. This was the first time she’d seen Adria so off. Ideas flew through her head. She watched Sweet Pea exit the bar with Adria over his shoulder. Maybe something happened when he brought her home.

“Not really.” Adria didn’t quite know what was wrong herself. Only that something felt fundamentally wrong. Something she couldn’t quite put her finger on.

The following week went by the same as usual. Adria was back to herself minus the nagging part in the back of her brain trying to figure out what the issue was. It was Wednesday when the announcement happened. They were closing Southside High down for good.

The reception to the announcement was mixed. Half the students would be going to Riverdale High and the other half would be going to other schools in the district depending on location. Sunnyside Trailer Park was in the area headed to Riverdale. Surprisingly enough Sweet Pea and Fangs were ecstatic, Toni was fairly excited as well. New books, new classrooms, actual working computers. All perks of the new school. Although Adria enjoyed being able to underachieve she was looking forward to having bathroom stalls with doors on them.

Adria walked out the front doors of Southside High, bidding a mental farewell to her makeshift home after everything fell apart. Toni sat on the front steps with Jughead, the two lucky assholes had a free last period.

“Oh hey, Ads.” Toni smiled “I was just reading Jughead’s new work. He wrote it on his new typewriter that Betty got him” she flashed Jughead a look before looking back at her friend

“I said no comment.” Jughead sighed, letting out a small chuckle “How have you been Adria? It’s been a while.” It had. She had seen Jughead around but he seemed preoccupied and they hadn’t really talked since the library.

“Good and bad. Kind of sad this place is closing down since it was starting to feel like home, but then again clean bathrooms so who am I to complain?”

“What, hold up. What?” Toni looked shocked, it was entirely possible they didn’t hear the announcement since they were outside for last period.

“Woo!” Adria wasn’t able to say anything before Sweet Pea and Fangs burst through the door with a group of Serpent boys behind them “Say goodbye to this hellhole!” Sweet Pea laughed

“Where are we going to go then?” Jughead looked confused, he had been at Southside even less time than she had so it had to be more jarring for him

“Riverdale High.” Sweet Pea explained “Along with Topaz, Rivera, and pretty much everyone else at Sunnyside. Think of all those Northside heads we’ll get to knock” He and Fangs started throwing mock punches at each other and Adria couldn’t help from roll her eyes. Toni seemed to have the same sentiment.

Jughead however seemed more than shocked. Like this was the last thing he could have wanted. Odd since she could have sworn Toni told her that he transferred from Riverdale. He could just fall back into place.

Toni opted to continue hanging out with Jughead to help him read through whatever thing he was writing this time. Adria rode home with Fangs and bid each other goodbye at their front doors. Not like that would stop either of them from bothering the other later if they felt like it.

“Ness?” She shouted to no response. She checked out the window again and sure enough her car was in the driveway. She searched the few rooms that the trailer contained and found nothing. Adria took a deep breath and braved the descent down to the basement, spider webs and all, to find Ness and FP.

“Adria!” She looked up from her work, startled to see her niece “You shouldn’t be down here. If social services finds out…”

“Relax, Ness. I’m not a narc” she scoffed “Just here to tell you the news.”

Ness looked at FP and then back to Adria “Well since you two haven’t formally met, FP this is my sister’s daughter Adria. Adria, this is FP. Leader of the Serpents.”

“I’ve heard a lot about you Adria.” FP came over and shook her hand “All good things I promise” he let out a bit of a chuckle

“Likewise” Adria smiled back “I know your son from school.” Adria turned back to Ness “Speaking of school they just announced that effective immediately everyone at Sunnyside is to be transferred to Riverdale High.”

FP let out a heavy sigh “That’s my cue to leave. I’ll need to talk to Jughead about all this, he won’t be happy. I’ll talk to you more about business later, Ness.” He turned to make his exit “It was nice meeting you Adria”

“You too”

Just like that FP disappeared out the door leaving only Ness and Adria. “How do you feel about all that?” Ness asked “I know it’s a lot of moving around in a short period of time. Riverdale high isn’t too bad of a drive. Definitely not walking distance though.”

“I’ll ride with Fangs like I usually do when I don’t walk with Toni. I’m sure Toni can get a ride with Sweet Pea.” Adria shrugged.

Ness laughed “The parents definitely won’t like all the riff raff riding in on motorcycles to corrupt their perfect children” she rolled her eyes “Just prepare yourself for some backlash. It’s not you, there’s just a lot of tension in this town between the north and south side.”

“So I’ve been told” Adria leaned up against a table “I’ve survived worse gossip about me I’m sure.”

“I’m not too worried, you’re tough as nails. Just like your aunt.”

---------------------

The next morning Adria stared at the outfit she picked out for the first day at Riverdale High. She glanced over at Toni who was sizing herself up in the mirror, looking equally nervous.

“This is going to be terrible isn’t it?” Adria asked

“Most likely.” Toni let out a heavy sigh “I’ll be surprised if one of the guys doesn’t get himself suspended today from getting in a fight.”

Adria threw on a high waisted denim skirt, an old serpent tee that she tied at the bottom, and a pair of old motorcycle ankle boots before throwing on the worn down leather jacket Ness gave her.

“Let’s get this over with then.”

The ride to Riverdale High didn’t take nearly as long as she would have liked but at least she arrived with Fangs, Toni, and Sweet Pea. They met up with a few other Serpent teens in the parking lot and all walked through the doors of Riverdale for the first time together.

The day went about as well as she hoped. A few of the students set up some sort of welcome desk for locker assignments and class schedules. However it didn’t take long for the real Riverdale High to show its ugly head.

“Here’s the school spirit I so fondly remember” Jughead said from beside them. Coming down the stairs was a tall red headed girl, dressed head to toe in red followed by a brawny brunette boy and a group of cheerleaders and boys in letterman jackets.

“Reminds me of how I used to be in Phoenix.” Adria whispered to Toni

“Cheryl.” The girl leading the welcome table said, the same one from the night at Karaoke who ran off “No one invited fascist Barbie to the party.”

The red head, Cheryl, smiled back at her “Wrong, Veronica. No one invited South Side scum to our school” she then turned to face the Serpents “Listen up Raggamuffins. I will not allow Riverdale High’s above average GPA to dip because of classrooms overcrowded with underachievers.”

Adria could feel the rage coming off of Toni, it was starting to seem like she would be the first to start a fight and not any of the guys. But Adria would be right behind her. She had never been in a fight before but that wouldn’t stop her from backing up her best friend.

“Why don’t you come over here and say that to my face.” Toni stepped forward to close this distance between her and Cheryl. Adria fell right in line beside her.

“Happily, Queen of the Buskers.” Cheryl closed some of the distance herself

“Okay everyone. “ The red head known as Archie stepped in between the two “Let’s just put our Northside-Southside differences aside.”

“Did you forget” The brawny brunette standing next to Cheryl stepped in “That these greasers were at your door ready to kick your ass?”

“We’re happy to finish what we started” Sweet Pea stepped in, looking for his own fight.

“We’re not here to take orders from someone who waved a gun around in our face” Adria interjected, starting to feel her anger swell up as well. It wasn’t long ago that she would have been Cheryl. A queen bee ready to step on anyone who didn’t worship the ground she walked on. It sucked being on the other side of it.

“That’s enough pomp and circumstance.” The man who she assumed was the principal stepped into the hallway “Go to class. Now.”

Soon enough everyone started dispersing, but Adria looked at Toni. Where were they supposed to go? They never even got their schedules.

When everyone finally figured out where they were supposed to be, they all went their separate ways to their first class. Adria was cursed with having math. Sure enough, people stared at her and the other serpent in her class. They not so quietly whispered and passed notes and she was already over it. She wasn’t sure how she would tolerate a day here let alone the rest of high school.

The minutes ticked on until they turned into hours and by the time lunch came she met up with Toni, Fangs, Jughead, and Sweet Pea in the student lounge. Thankfully there were only a few Northsiders scattered about and most of them she recognized from the registration desk that morning.

They were making casual small talk about classes and the like until the girl named Veronica appeared with a large smile on her face. One that very much looked forced.

“We haven’t formally met. I’m Veronica Lodge” She held out her hand to Toni, who shook it

“Of the Park Avenue Lodges” Jughead interjected, making himself sound hoity toity.

“Toni. Topaz.” Toni said, forcing herself to smile a little as well

“Ah like the gemstone.” She smiled again “And you are?” she held out her hand to Adria

“Adria Rivera. Of the Mexico City Riveras.” She attempted to mimic Veronicas tone as she shook her hand. Veronica’s smile faltered for a moment, while the other Northsiders around her were clearly frowning. She could feel they were slightly afraid of her now. Good. Let them be.

“Adria. I’ve heard about you from Betty.” She said. Jughead must have told Betty about the dangerous cartel girl. “Seems we have a lot in common. My dad just got out of jail.”

Adria raised an eyebrow. She’d have to ask Jughead about that later.

“Well..” the girl beside her started “Im Josie…formerly of the Pussycats…now just Josie.” Her sadness was apparent. Although Adria wasn’t sure if the Pussycats were a band, some sports group, or even some sort of weird gang.

Then again she hung out with kids in a gang called the Serpents.

“All of you. Out here immediately” She didn’t even notice the principal come in but his voice sounded serious. And angry. The lounge filed out to the front hallway to notice a snake tag over the school seal. The Serpents looked at each other confused. It couldn’t have been any of them.

“As you can see Principal Weatherbee” The brawny brunette from earlier said “They have to tag their turf.”

“Can you be any more transparent, Reggie?” Veronica groaned, clearly annoyed with the situation as well. The boy nodded at her after a second of thought. Adria wasn’t sure if he knew what transparent even meant.

“That’s it. From this moment on there will be no gang activity.” Weatherbee was firm “All gang paraphernalia including Serpent jackets are banned.” There was some protest coming from the crowd behind her “And all tattoos are to be covered. Anyone who doesn’t comply will be suspended.”

Adria supposed it couldn’t get any worse.

-----------------------

After school they all went to the Wyrm to try to decompress. Classes were definitely harder and the teachers actually expected something of them. The stares and blatant hostility toward them wasn’t helping either.

Toni and Jughead were arguing about the new school circumstances while Sweet Pea played arcade games. Adria didn’t catch much while she stared into her social media accounts but something about ‘discrimination’ and ‘what’s next, mind control?’ She could practically hear Toni rolling her eyes.

She continued to scroll through Fangs’ snapchat which had some brief pictures of him hanging out with the girl from FP’s retirement party. It felt like soon she would just be left with Sweet Pea since Toni was hanging around Jughead more and more.

She contemplated finding her own ‘special friend’ but dismissed the thought almost immediately. No one here caught her eye. Sure there was no shortage of good looking guys at school and in the Serpents but no one sparked her interest. Maybe she was just cursed to be alone.

“Guys, I gotta go. My dad’s calling.” The strange number showed up on her phone again and her eyes immediately lit up. At least she still had one man in her life. Adria waved the group goodbye and talked to her dad on the walk home. Of course it was more bad news. The prosecution was dragging everything out to find more evidence and he still wasn’t any closer to getting out. His lawyers were working overtime and it seemed like the state was throwing everything they could at him. It was apparent they were making an example of him. They couldn’t touch any of her uncles in Mexico so they would show them what happens if they screw up on US soil.

It was completely unfair and Adria was suffering for it. The initial hope of being back home before the spring was gone. She was quickly losing hope that she would even make it back before she was 18. Although she had friends here now so surely it couldn’t be that bad. But the more she wanted to be here with her new friends the worse she felt. This wasn’t her life.

------------------------

Hours passed since her phone call with her dad left her with more bad news. Ness hadn’t returned home yet so she resigned herself to eating frozen potato skins and watching the home improvement network.

“That paint color suuuuucks.” Adria groaned, taking a sip of whatever awful beer Ness had in the fridge. She let out a deep sigh “This is more fun with Fangs.” She flipped through a few more channels, shoving potato skins into her mouth. At least with Ness and Toni gone she didn’t have to worry about how she looked.

Her channel flipping was interrupted by a knock on the door. The knock alone was concerning enough. Ness and Toni didn’t need to knock since they both had keys. She was also pretty sure last time Fangs showed up he just walked in. Did Sunnyside have girl scouts? There was an abundance of weed downstairs. Some samoas and tagalongs would go well with the munchies.

Adria shook the crumbs off her shirt and answered the door. Unfortunately for her the person there was far too tall to be a girl scout.

“Hey. Can I come in?” Sweet Pea asked. Adria sized him up, trying to figure out his motive. She couldn’t think of any reason why he would show up without Fangs forcing him to.

“Ness and Toni aren’t here.” Adria explained

“We need to talk.”

Adria’s eyes narrowed in suspicion, but for some reason she let him in anyway. The pair stood awkwardly in the living room as they waited for the other to say something. Anything really. The silence was quickly driving her crazy. How many beers did she have again?

“Sweet Pea, why are you here?” Adria rubbed her temples

“FP’s party the other night. You were acting weird so I came to make sure everything was okay.”

Surprising. Very surprising.

“Yeah, I’m fine. No need to worry about me.”

He stopped for a moment and just stared at her before letting out a small sigh.

“Okay enough with the bullshit. We both know why I’m here.” Adria raised an eyebrow at him before he continued “I see the way you look at me”

She was immediately taken aback. She opened her mouth to speak but immediately shut it again. What in the hell was happening?

“I have no clue what you’re talking about. I don’t look at you any different than Fangs or Toni” She argued

Lie.

Sweet Pea let out a small chuckle and moved a few steps forward. Adria struggled to maintain the distance by moving a few steps back

“You mean all this time I haven’t been catching you staring when you think I’m not looking?”

“Let’s get one thing straight, I don’t stare. Maybe you’re delusional because you’re the one staring at me.”

Lie.

The distance continued to close and Adria felt herself up against the wall with nowhere left to go. Why did the trailer have to be so damn small?

“So you’re saying that you don’t want me right now?” He stood maybe a foot away from her at this point, the glint apparent in his eyes. Adria felt her heart rate pick up the pace to the point where it felt like it was ready to beat out of her chest.

“Not in the slightest.”

Another lie.

“How is it that you come from a family of liars and I still can’t believe a word you’re saying right now?” He moved to brush a piece of hair that fell in her face. Carefully tucking it behind her ear, letting his hand linger there. He knew exactly what he was doing and it was driving her crazy.

“That’s because-“

She was immediately cut off by his lips on hers and the flood gates broke. Adria wrapped her arms around his neck and entangled her hands in his hair. She needed to be as close as possible. His tongue grazed against her bottom lip and she immediately let him in. Why did she fight this for so long?

She felt him smile before he pulled away and looked down at her.

“I bet you wish you weren’t going to wake up now.” His smile was as confident as ever

“What?” She asked

------------------

Adria shot up in her bed as her alarm went off. She looked over at the clock. 7 Am. She immediately collapsed back into bed and shoved the pillow over her head, letting out a small muffled scream. This couldn’t be happening.

Adrianna Luz Rivera does not catch feelings.

#sweet pea #sweet pea x reader #sweet pea x oc #riverdale #fanfic #fireandice #holyshitimfinallydonecrossposting #thank god #slow burn

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neverplannedonnewsies · 6 years

Text

A Walk in the Park

Just love Davey, what can I say? I’ll try and branch out to new characters soon guys, but I hope you guys like this slightly self-indulgent fic for now ;)

Davey x reader pairing. No warnings.

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“Y/N! Come downstairs at once, Mr. Inglesworth is at the door!”

You sighed, regretful setting aside your book and accepting your gloves and hat from the maid. Your mother clucked over you, brushing at your dress and worrying that your hair was not tidy enough. You dutifully followed her downstairs where Mr. John Inglesworth was waiting. He had been attempting to court you for several months – attempting because you wanted nothing to do with him. Certainly he was rich, handsome, everything you were supposed to be looking for in a husband, but you just didn’t like him. He had been nothing but courteous to you, but it was just a feeling you had, the way he’d phrase his remarks that had you reluctant to spend time in his company. He was also rather arrogant which did not help.

Your parents, however, were absolutely enamored with him and insisted on pushing you together at every opportunity. Thus today’s outing for a stroll around Central Park.

“Miss Y/L/N, what a delight it is to see you. And if I may say, you are looking particularly radiant today.” You smiled wanly as he bowed over your hand and placed a kiss upon it. Your skin tingled with annoyance and you quickly pulled on your gloves to resist the childish urge to scrub the back of your hand.

With a last goodbye to your mother you took hold of Mr. Inglesworths’ outstretched arm and he swept you out the door. Your residence overlooked Central Park, the close proximity being the reason you had insisted the outing take place there. You figured you could stroll for a little while, and if Mr. Inglesworth persisted in being irritating you could plead a headache and be done with him quickly. He began with his usual chatter, talking about only topics that interested him and bored you to tears, until he briefly mentioned, “I heard tell of a female reporter writing for The Sun. And not just the social pages, but front page stories! It’s a disgrace it is.”

You gritted your teeth in annoyance – that headache might not end up being fake after all.

“I think it’s wonderful,” you said, trying to keep your composure.

“Oh you females would naturally want to stick by one another but surely a woman of your status cannot possibly condone that sort of behavior.” He didn’t seem to actually expect a response to this, which was good because you had been about to say something very rude. You decide the best way to survive this outing would be to say as little as possible – not difficult with the amount of blather coming from Mr. Inglesworth. Just when you thought if you had to hear him speak one more word you would scream, an interruption blissfully came your way.

“Care to buy a pape, sir? Ma’am?” The question came from a nearby newsboy – though boy probably wasn’t the right word as he was a least the same age as you, if not slightly older. He was also rather nicely dressed for a newsie, and cleaner than most of the poor boys you saw running around hawking the headlines. Mr. Inglesworth didn’t seem to notice any of this though and merely snarled, “Not from the likes of you, you street urchin.”

Mr. Inglesworth began pulling you rather roughly away, as though being in proximity to someone from the working class would prove dangerous. The newsboy’s face became carefully blank, but you could see the anger behind his eyes. You dug in your heels and stated loudly, “Actually, Mr. Inglesworth, I would care for a paper. Please be so kind as to wait a moment while I purchase one.”

Mr. Inglesworth frowned, but stiffly said, “Very well.”

You turned to the newsie who now had a mischievous glint in his eyes, and asked, “Any good stories today?”

“Yes ma’am, there was quite the fire down at the docks last night, and there’s also an editorial on Roosevelt’s recent bill proposal.” He was educated too, it seemed.

“What’s your opinion on Roosevelt?” You asked this just to annoy Mr. Inglesworth – he detested Roosevelt, and you suspected this newsie would be in favor of him due to the recent strike.

“Oh he’s a brilliant man. I actually met him when he put his support behind the newsboy strike.”

You raised your eyebrows, impressed – if he had met Roosevelt that meant he was one of the leaders of the strike. You started to ask him more about it when Mr. Inglesworth gave a loud, aggravated sigh and said, “Miss Y/L/N I believe we should continue on – don’t want to deny this chap time to sell his newspapers” and gave a very insincere smile.

Annoyance flared up in you again, however this time you were forced to acknowledge that in this one instance Mr. Inglesworth might be right. You didn’t want to hurt the young man’s chances of selling all his papers. So you bid the newsie farewell with a smile, tucked your newspaper under your arm, and continued on with Mr. Inglesworth.

Spirits buoyed by having you to himself again, Mr. Inglesworth continued with his relentless chatter, and you tuned him out by thinking about the handsome newsie with the strong cheekbones and soft hands. You tuned him out so effectively, however, that you were caught completely off-guard when Mr. Inglesworth began sprouting off nonsense about how beautiful you were, how wonderful life would be as his wife, and promptly got down on one knee and asked you to marry him – in a public place!

“Do stand up,” you hissed, cheeks turning red at the sight of people staring. He obliged you in this instance, but kept a firm grip on your hands.

“I know this is a bit unorthodox, but I have already asked your father for his blessing and he has granted it, so I thought it best to get on with things. I’m thinking a spring wedding, though I-“

“Mr. Inglesworth!” you burst out.

“John, please. I believe at this point we can dispense with formalities,” he chuckled in what you were sure he thought was an indulgent manner, but merely came across as condescending.

“Mr. Inglesworth,” you said in a firmer tone, “While I appreciate very much the offer of your hand I am afraid that I must decline. Please accept my sincerest regrets.”

He appeared stunned, “You…decline?”

“Yes.”

“That’s not possible.”

“Given that it just happened, I assure you it is.”

“But it is not possible! I am a gentleman of as high a stature as you could hope to marry! Your father has already given his approval, you cannot-”

“I believe the lady said no,” a quiet voice interrupted. “And a gentleman would accept her word.”

You both turned to see the newsie from earlier standing there, looking determinedly at Mr. Inglesworth. He was clearly trying to keep the situation calm, but held his body stiffly as though he was preparing for a confrontation.

Mr. Inglesworth swelled, getting ready to shout and you quickly stepped in, “John, people are staring. If you make a scene this is likely to get into the gossip columns. Please just go.”

Your remark seemed to remind him where he was, and how poorly his image would suffer if the rest of New York’s high society got wind of this. Shouting at a woman would never be viewed positively, no matter what the circumstances. He shot you one more venomous look and strode quickly away.

“Are you all right miss?”

You sighed with relief, “Yes, now that he’s gone. Thank you for stepping in.”

“You had him pretty well handled; I just thought you could use a bit of moral support.” Now that you were alone he had become wonderfully relaxed and seemed almost an entirely different boy than the one moments before.

“Well thank you all the same, Mr…?”

“Jacobs. My name is David Jacobs, but you may call me Davey if you’re comfortable with the ‘informality’.” You grin broadened and you said,

“Very well, Davey. You may call me Y/N if you wish.”

“May I walk you home since your escort so unceremoniously abandoned you?” he bowed and offered his arm, making you laugh and gratefully accept it. You could not help but notice his arm was more well-muscled than Mr. Inglesworth’s had been. This walk in the park certainly had taken a turn for the better.

“So tell me, what was Roosevelt really like?”

“Oh he was just as brusque and loud as you read in the papes, really takes charge of a room. My friend Jack is normally so sure of himself but he nearly fell apart after shaking his hand, it was so funny…”

You continued on, listening in interest as he told you about the newsie strike and the rest of his newsie brothers, all too soon ending up back at the doorstep to your family’s townhouse.

“It was a pleasure meeting you, Davey. And thank you again.”

“The pleasure was all mine, Miss Y/N” Davey said as he bowed over your hand, placing a soft kiss on it and looked up at you with a slightly goofy smile which you returned.

“Will you be back in the park selling papers tomorrow?” you asked hopefully.

“Absolutely.”

You watched him walk away, you heart doing an extra little thump when he turned to look back at you as he walked down the street. Your hand still tingled when you turned to go inside, but this time it was a wonderful feeling.

#davey jacobs fanfiction #davey jacobs fan fiction #newsies fanfiction #newsies fan fiction #newsies #david jacobs #davey #davey x reader #david jacobs x reader #mine #davey jacobs x reader #a walk in the park #fan fiction #fanfiction #i just love davey #i want a davey #jack kelly

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rkxblue · 5 years

Text

happy #rkfifth !

i told myself i wasn’t going 2 do this b/c ... i’m lazy bean, but here we are anyway! let’s get it!

but anyways starting off rookies was kind of like a vacation to me, rp wise. before rk i had my own rp that lasted a while but during 2013, there was just some drama between members that i constantly had 2 deal with and honestly it was like ... dragging me down, making admining seem like a chore and i loathed logging on to the main b/c i knew there would be some shit w/ these certain people that i had to deal with. so seeing rk in the tags being a different kind of idol roleplay ( and shout out rk for being a trendsetter ) /and/ the fact that reserves were filling up so quickly for a new rp, i quickly sent in a muse.

and it was a little ... idk at first. i did feel out of place considering most came from a different rp in the beginning and i wasn’t, and on top of me being v awkward w/ talking 2 people on instant messengers, there was a bit of time where i felt like i didn’t fit in and almost dropped like 2 weeks after i joined, LOL. luckily at the time a lot of things were going on which helped w/ plotting and meeting new muses, and everyone was super friendly and nice and that’s what kept me here!!!

so then rk turned from a vacation you didn’t want to leave from -- i ended up slagging off p majorly on my responsibilities as an admin at my own rp for a while because i was having such a good time at rk -- it rly brought back my love for rp and muse and tbh if you look back at rksunyoung’s archive back in 2013 - early 2014, i don’t think i’ve ever written as much on tumblr as i did back then, LOL. rk has definitely had it’s ups and downs and i’ve dropped both of my muses before -- but it wasn’t too long before i was bringing them back because there really isn’t a place like rk within krp. that, along with the dedication between both members and admins, is why it’s lasted so long and is still thriving with a super active dash after five fucking years. that’s crazy!! i think i remember mei saying something similar on twitter -- but when i see old rp friends and they ask “omg ur /still/ at rk???”

so it’s obvious to see why this rp went from feeling like a vacation to a home, right?? it’ll always have a special place in my heart ♡

anyways moving on to my characters too -- when i first brought rksunyoung, now miss rkxblue, i never thought that she would last more than a couple of months, much less be involved with so many things within rk’s history!! it’s ... p wild to think about, especially since i’m someone that has a hard time committing to hobbies and such. it’s been a fun ride watching her go from someone who was wild and reckless and had a problem with love and a little bit of anger issues to someone whos a lot more well rounded, a soft idiot LOL. she even finally got herself the sweetest boyfriend after four years of being shipless on the rp, which i still can’t wrap my head around because denying herself love and believing that it doesn’t exist was one of her /things/ for the longest time. the list of stuff she’s done is so long and now that it’s lead to her finally debuting it’s ... scary yet exciting for her, to be honest, she thought she’d be a trainee forever!! i’ve had a lot of ups and downs with her muse as well, to the point where there was like years ( i think ) of inactivity on my end and she should have 4238972389 more points than she does atm because of that. i do feel sorry for her b/c that was just me being lazy ofc, but in the end i’ve gotten my shit together on her and have been pumping out replies p consistently this year and plotting w/ trainees which has done wonders for her muse. and although hyomin was literally /the/ perfect fc for her considering her personality, the fc change 2 yura has also helped majorly with my muse and it’s been so much easier to plot and reply and even with her characterization too.

as for miss rknvna!! she hasn’t had as much development as sun, aside from her tumultuous rls with a former song minho and being a royal trainee during her first run, and that’s mainly been due to my laziness again jfkafl;a. the good thing tho is that i’ve finally been able to experience life as a rookie with her, considering the times my girls have become trainees were v quick ( sun’s first time was like a week or two after the rp opened, then 3 months after i rejoined w/ her, and nana became a trainee only a month after she joined the first time ) so it was nice to experience the freedom that came with being a rookie!! since 2018 has been sun’s year, i’m going to focus on nana for 2019 so that she can branch out more!!

i guess before i move on i should give shoutouts to all my other rkmuses throughout the years whose lives were so short that i can’t even remember their urls LOL -- my song jieun, park kyungri, goo hara, and choi jinri muses!! i’m sure there’s at least one more that i’m forgetting, but they all lasted around 2 weeks so...

but i also want 2 thank rk for allowing me to be more social as well!! i’ve said this in the last anniversary post i wrote 25238957 years ago but i used 2 have a phobia of sorts when it came 2 instant messengers, so i didn’t rly have one when msn was popping and therefore, didn’t talk 2 many people ooc wise in rps. i made an aim when i came to rk and just ... diving in and talking to people helped out a lot with that, even if i do still get anxious from time to time w/ just simply messaging people. :(

i’m a shy individual ( and for some reason its only exacerbated online??? idk fam ) and unconsciously rather private as well, so that definitely hinders me from making friends as much as i would like to, but it’s a day by day process!! it’s something i’ve come 2 terms w/ as of late and will seriously work on within the next year! but even w/ me being the way that i am, i’ve been able 2 meet a couple of people that have made my experience in rk just a little bit brighter so a ( very brief ) shout out 2 them ~

to maria ( @rkjinkis ) : my sweet angel!!! i’m so glad that rk brought us together because you’ve honestly become one of my closest friends from this rp and in general tbh!! ur so super sweet and caring and a blessing 2 my life, just as much as jinki is to ahyoung’s!! i’m sorry that sun is too independent for her own good but she’s working on it okay!! baby steps!! i love how genuine u are and how we can rely on each other through thick and then, and honestly i want the world for u and more. i love love love LOVE u so much, and i’ll make sure u never forget it!! thank u for being my friend and my source of happiness!!! ♡ ♡ ♡

to hamin ( @rksoohyun ) : despite the fact that we knew each other from snu it was rk that actually got us 2 start talking and i’m so grateful for that!! u literally are the cutest girl in the entire world and ur just as outgoing irl as u are online; seeing morning musume ( a group i thought i would never see live ) w/ u was truly a highlight in my life!!! and ofc soohyun will forever be nana’s fuckin child and she’ll always be rooting for her happiness!! i love u u sweet buttercup and i can’t wait until ur back so i can talk 2 u again!!! ♡ ♡ ♡

to mei ( @rkariel ) : man i admired u for the longest b/c i’ve always loved the way u write and ur characterization of tiffany / ariel, so when years ago nick told me that u were actually paying attention to the minana plot and threads i was so shook i nearly tripped over myself LMFAO. i’m happy that we actually started talking b/c of that tho!!! it’s so easy 2 write w/ u and i honestly have so much fun regardless if we’re just talking about our characters, getting carried away on dash or twitter, or hurting each other w/ headcanons!! ariel has become nana’s rock p much and w/o her i’m not sure how she would of fared her time w/ mino w/o her and their discussions!!! i hope that we can become closer in the future!!

to razel ( @rkcheri ) : hiya boo!!! ik we don’t rly talk anymore but i still wanted 2 mention u b/c u were one of my first friends in rk when i felt kinda lonely, and that was definitely one of the reasons i was able to stick around!! i loved writing w/ u b/c ur writing style was always so unique that i could actually point u out whenever we were in past rps together and it’s an honor 2 even write w/ u fjkalf;a. i’m sorry that sun is such a shitty friend and i’m looking forward 2 the day jihyun kicks her ass about not telling her about jinki b/c she deserves it LOL. but just, thank u!!!!

to amy ( @yienrk ) : are u surprised ur on here?? HAHA we don’t talk too much either but i do appreciate u checking up on me whenever i’m down and just generally being supportive and nice!!! also i’m in awe about how knowledgeable u are about idols in general ( i remember one of our first convos being about how sixteen came 2 be and the collapse of all of jype’s trainees and such ) and i love yien and nana’s supportive relationship too!! i can’t wait 2 see how they develop, and i hope 2 get closer 2 u in the future!! ; u ;

to eclipse girls ( @rkariel , @rkaudrey , @rkhaseul , @rkjennie , @rkyeri ) sun couldn’t of asked 2 debut w/ a better group of girls and i’m so glad that they harmonize w/ each other so well!! i’m excited 2 see what debuting brings for them!! ♡ ♡ ♡

and a shoutout 2 snu crew too ( piper / hoonji, nanu, @rksang, @rktomu, @rksoohyun , @rkjinhwan94, @rkpcy ) : even tho ik majority of u probably won’t see this i’m still tagging and talking about y’all anyway!!! i have so much fun reminiscing w/ u guys whenever we can, and i’m happy that i’ve grown closer too u all as well!! i’m sorry i was such a shit admin back in the day, and what brought y’all together was bad circumstances, but i’m glad it’s something that we can all look back on and laugh at now. i miss being together w/ all of u at once but i hope y’all are doing okay!!!! ♡ ♡ ♡

and naturally, the admods too!!! thank u guys for putting up w/ all my shit whenever i was in a slump or i sent in points late or fucked up the points ( honestly kyle u are such an angel for real LOL ), and for just keeping the rp in tip top shape!!! ur the back bone of rk and we couldn’t of made it this far w/ each and every one of u and ur contributions and dedication 2 the rp!!! i’m super proud of u guys and am proud 2 call u my admins!!!! ♡

and ofc shoutout 2 everyone that i’ve ever plotted and threaded w/ in the past and present -- i’m super shit at replying 2 those in general so thank u for being patient w/ me even though i don’t deserve it. i don’t know how else 2 end this b/c i’m also super shit at ending things so uh.... happy fifth year anniversary rk!!! here’s to many more!!!

#❛ ▼ ‧ ‧ ‧ ‹‹ misc • OOC ››#rkfifth #* this is a hot mess but i hope y'all can follow fjkalfja;

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kpopfanfictrash · 7 years

Text

Dichotomy

Author: @kpopfanfictrash , as part of the Bound series with @underthejoon

Creative Content Contributor: @m00nk1ld FOR THIS FREAKING AMAZING MOODBOARD. I actually yelled out loud, the first time I laid eyes.

Rating: 18 + (explicit sex, road head, denied orgasm, dirty talk, hate sex)

Word Count: 14,566

Summary: You hate him. He hates you. It’s a fine line though, isn’t it – between love and hate? (Arranged Marriage!AU)

Everything sparkles under the light.

Seen from above, there’s a cold, dark sheen to the floor. The ballroom is elegant, designed to make an outsider feel small but you’re no outsider tonight. You’ve always been a part of this life and it’s this fact which makes you down the rest of your wine.

A string quartet plays in the background, the music soft and introspective. It’d sound is gentle, unlike the laugh of your husband. His is anything but, cutting easily above the eaves of the room. It’s odd, to think that word to yourself: husband. Especially when used in relation to wife.

You don’t feel old enough to be married. Though can anyone feel old enough to be married without a choice? The question is rhetorical, it exists without an answer because you know the answer is no. From the top of the balcony, you watch Taehyung speak to several important businessmen. Among them is his best friend Jimin, you recognize the sandy blonde hair from here. Taehyung doesn’t look at you, which you suppose is typical. Before now, you were together for most of the night and this is the first moment you’ve had to yourself since arriving.

Already, you know your father will be tapping his watch. He’ll glance your way, then at Taehyung, as though to say – not good enough. As though to say, try harder. You need to act as though you’re in love, convince everyone else – even if you can’t manage to convince yourselves. Heaving a sigh, you turn away from the room. The staircase downward is white, unlike the color of the floor. The white bleeds into the handrails, inked stains which twist and wrap along the railings. You count down in your head, descending into the room.

Ten – more seconds of silence. Nine – more seconds of not smiling. Eight – more seconds until meeting his gaze. Seven – more seconds before he looks down. Six – more seconds until you’re beside him. Five – more seconds until he grabs your hand. Four – more seconds until your palm starts to sweat. Three – more seconds until you’re wondering how you should stand, where you should look, what you should say. Two – more seconds until you swallow your pride. One – until you don a mask of composure.

When you reach Taehyung you smile, slipping your right hand into his. His fingers wrap automatically around yours, loosening when he realizes you’re present. His gaze drifts sideways and upon seeing you, he stiffens, before becoming the perfect picture of composure. “Y/N,” he nods, leaning in to brush cold lips to your cheek. “I missed you.”

Jimin smiles, lifting his glass and you nod at this, before surveying at the others. The entire point of tonight’s function is to see and be seen. Your father explained this to you very carefully beforehand. Your father – the mayor. Taehyung’s father – the chief of police. This whole marriage was orchestrated to solidify power; to relieve a city whose streets are rife with tension. It was appeasement for the mounting frustration of the people towards the government.

When you first heard the idea, you thought it ridiculous. The first time your father explained, you actually laughed out loud. Talking soon became persuasion though, and when all else failed, he begged. After that came the threats.

A glass of champagne is pressed into your palm and you stare into its depths and remember. You remember the crying, the yelling before eventually giving in to a broken promise. Taehyung stood by all the while, silent in the corner, as though he wished to sink in on himself and never return. As though he had already separated each moment before him, strung them back together in a new order and avoided the problem entirely.

You both said yes. You both said yes, and here you stand. Taehyung’s left hand held by yours; together, but separate. You’re next to one another, with no idea what the other is thinking. No idea what the other feels, what they want, what they need. Neither one of you cares though, at least not enough to ask.

The obligatory part of the evening is over, leaving you with the requisite socializing and mingling. Something which should also be ending soon, although who knows if it will. Taehyung is more social than you, often likes to stay late at these events. He could want another hour and, thinking this – you glance in boredom at the edge of the room.

You’re surprised when he leans down, lips brushing the shell of your ear. “Ready to go?” Taehyung murmurs.

You nod. When a waiter passes your side, you set the near-empty glass down on his tray. Taehyung shakes hands with Jimin as you smile; first at him, then at the other man in the group. Taehyung keeps his expression pleasant, voice deep and casual. You stand to the side, thanking the gentlemen for their generous donations. All the people you’re thanking are men, all of them cut from the same kind of cloth. God forbid, your fathers try to enact some diversity among their sponsors.

Taehyung’s arm slips through yours, pulling you towards the door. To everyone else, you seem like the perfect picture of marriage. An intricately crafted love story, one which appeared on the front page of each newspaper the day you became engaged. Taehyung, the city’s golden boy, son of the chief police officer. You, the darling of the political scene, known since you were in pigtails and hanging on the coattails of your father.

Now, though, the two of you are grown. Taehyung leads through the crowd, his one hand clasped protectively over yours. He doesn’t look back, and you don’t look at him. Instead you nod at your father, waiting until he waves goodbye. Your mother stands by his side, glancing worriedly at Taehyung before waving farewell.

You ignore them both, exiting into the lobby. It’s kind of her to worry, you suppose but in your mind it’s too little, too late. It’s not that Taehyung is a bad guy, really. He’s just not your guy. He hasn’t been, ever since high school. Ever since the two of you stopped being friends.

“Did you bring your coat?” Taehyung queries, bringing you back to the present.

Blinking, you realize you’re standing at the coat check. “Yes,” you arch a brow. “We came in here together, remember? You’re holding my ticket in your suit pocket?”

“How am I supposed to remember that,” Taehyung grumbles, fishing around in his coat. “Aha!” he declares, pulling out the two stubs. “These two,” he smiles pleasantly at the coat man, sliding them over the counter.

The gentleman nods, taking the tickets. Before he leaves, he glances at you and you wince, recognizing the coldness in your tone. Taehyung seems to realize this as well, smiling meekly while sliding one arm over your shoulder.

He drops a kiss to your collarbone, chuckling. “Sorry, darling. I would forget my head, if it weren’t screwed on straight.”

You smile, though the gesture is terse. “Don’t worry, sweetheart.”

Pacified, the man walks away and as soon as he’s gone, Taehyung releases his arm. He steps aside, looking down at his shoes because normally, the two of you are better than this. Typically, you’re better at fooling the attention of the public. This was a lapse.

Fiddling with his keys, Taehyung smiles when your coats are returned. Taking yours first, he helps you into it while you fasten golden buttons up to the edge of your chin. It’s easy to pretend, when he acts like this. It’s easy to imagine different circumstances, ones where Taehyung is a dutiful, attentive husband who loves his wife.

His wife, who’s just not you.

Your stomach turns when Taehyung leads you away, pushing open the front doors and stepping into the night. The car is already parked at the bottom of the stairs, Taehyung having handed his ticket to the valet minutes prior. As soon as you leave, a man rushes forward with the keys to your Audi R8, which Taehyung accepts gratefully to fasten onto his key chain.

“Thank you,” Taehyung smiles, sliding a tip into his hand.

It’s drizzling, chilled rain damp on your skin walking out to the car. Taehyung opens the side door first, helping you in – like he always does. He waits until your skirts are rearranged before shutting the door and lowering himself to the driver’s seat, glancing at you before pulling out into traffic.

“Ah,” Taehyung exhales, loosening his tie. His other hand he keeps firm on the wheel. “That was fucking exhausting.”

“Yep,” you mutter, leaning back to stare at the rain. “Not helped, really by that fuck up at the coat check.”

In the glass of the window, you see Taehyung’s jaw tighten. “Yep,” he grunts and when he switches lanes, he moves faster than necessary. “I love having such a supportive wife. It’s what I always dreamed about growing up.”

Shifting in the seat, you roll your eyes. “Dreams do come true, don’t they? I always dreamt I’d marry some sycophantic pants-wetter, who once cheated off my AP History exam.”

“Hey,” Taehyung yelps, glancing sideways. “I was fifteen! And I’m not a sycophant,” he grumbles, petulant. “You’re the sycophant.”

“You probably can’t even spell sycophant.”

“Yeah? Well, can you spell this.”

When you glance at him, Taehyung is holding up his middle finger.

“Nice. Classy.”

“You started it,” he mutters.

“Good fucking lord,” you exhale, sliding farther in your seat. “It’s like we’re still in high school.”

Taehyung turns up the radio, and that’s that. It’s his jazz playlist, meaning he’s done talking to you for the night. Taehyung knows you don’t particularly enjoy jazz, so this is his way of saying he doesn’t give a fuck.

Staring outside, you know it wasn’t always this way. Taehyung once was your best friend. All through elementary school, middle school, the first two years of high school – the two of you were inseparable, could barely be parted. It made sense, you suppose, given the amount of time you two spent together.

Whenever your fathers had meetings or rallies, there was Taehyung. At first, the two of you played together in playpens. Then on playgrounds. Then in basements, in bedrooms, sprawled out on couches while surfing the internet and arguing loudly over nothing.

You and Taehyung always argued, it’s one of the few things you ever agreed upon. Taehyung was loud even then, overly opinionated – so were you, but only once you knew someone. You never had a problem telling off Taehyung, though. He was just so honest, unflinchingly so. His bluntness and kindness was an unusual combination, one which typically inspired the same conduct from you.

That was back when you were friends. Your relationship unraveled a long time ago – sometime around the third year of high school. There were a lot of things which led to the break, though right now only two come to mind. Both of them occurred when you were sixteen, young and impatient, just starting to recognize boys could be something more than friends in life.

Your female best friends were Allison and Kelsey. Looking back on those friendships, you know them to be anything but. They were friends of convenience, nothing more since the three of you lost touch after high school and never looked back. Since you moved into the city, you honestly haven’t even considered looking them up.

The first breaking point was when Kelsey went on a date. It was a boy named Jinyoung, although he never called her afterwards. The date went to Kelsey’s head, made her act as though she knew things the two of you possibly couldn’t. She liked to lord this over both you and Allison at lunch.

“You know,” Kelsey sighed, expressing that youthful wisdom all teenagers have. “You should just ask him out, Allison. Guys are into that sort of thing, trust me.”

Trying to control your smile, you took a bite of your sandwich. In your opinion, asking someone out seemed like a person-by-person scenario. Blanket statements like, ‘guys like this,’ were always untrue; people couldn’t be so easily described. Kelsey wouldn’t be argued with though, couldn’t be because she had experience and you didn’t.

“For example,” Kelsey looked at Allison carefully. “You should ask out Taehyung, Ali. It’s so obvious that you like him. Do something about it!”

“I do not,” Ali gasped, hiding behind her trapper-keeper. “You’re just – don’t be stupid, Kels. I don’t like Kim Taehyung like that.”

You hadn’t been paying attention to the conversation before, but when Ali said Taehyung’s name, you choked. Kelsey slowly looked at you, watching you awkwardly swallow. “Taehyung?” you gasped, eyes watering. “Like – my Taehyung?”

“Yours?” Kelsey arched a brow. She looked – to put it nicely – like the proverbial cat which ate the canary.

When she said that, your face heated up. “I mean,” you backtracked. “He’s not mine. Of course, Taehyung isn’t mine. I just meant like, my friend. My friend, Taehyung.”

Both Kelsey and Allison looked at you.

“You sure?” Kelsey mused. “I don’t know. You do look at him a lot, Y/N. You stare at him, more like it. Doesn’t she look at Taehyung,” she queried, turning to Allison.

With a rather guilty look, Allison nodded. “Yeah. But like, they’re friends,” she smiled, attempting to be nice. “Taehyung and Y/N have known each other forever – since they were in diapers. Of course they’re not into each other like that. He doesn’t see her in that way.”

“Right,” Kelsey laughed, nodding. “He’d never.”

They moved on to a new topic – what Allison would wear to attract Taehyung’s attention – and you stared down at your sandwich, suddenly not hungry. The bread was stale, the lettuce wan and you blinked at your table, struggling to ignore the way your hands shook.

Gently, you slid them under the surface. Honestly, you rarely thought about boys in that way. In the way Kelsey and Allison spoke of, about getting dressed up and made up and taken out. There were moments though, times which always seemed to happen with Taehyung. He was different – ah, that sounded bad. You always knew he was different, but the fact was never important to you. He was male, nothing more. It was a non-essential piece of information which didn’t affect your friendship. He was just... Taehyung, he was your friend and he was a boy.

Recently you’d begun to wonder though, if there was something more. Sometimes his hand lingered too long, pulling you up from the ground. Oftentimes he stood at your locker, stared at you in a way which made your stomach twist round in knots.

Once, he buttoned up the top button of your uniform. “Do you want pervs to see?” he’d scolded, taking a step closer.

He was so close to you that you froze, unable to breathe while his gaze dipped from your eyes to your lips, then back up.

Sometimes, you thought about that day. The warmth of his body, so close to yours and the way he smelled, like aftershave and a boyish scent of cologne. You recognized the smell of aftershave, because it smelled like something your father would buy. It was a smell you never thought you’d recognize, never thought that you’d like but on Taehyung, you did.

You thought about this often, how his fingers slowed on that top button, how he attempted to stretch one moment into several. The way he let go, disappeared and you went to your homeroom, he went to his. Ever since then, the touch of his fingers on yours – you had been wondering.

“Why not?” you interrupted.

Allison and Kelsey looked up, surprised. “Why not?” Kelsey’s forehead furrowed. “What?”

“Yeah,” you blurted. “Why, uh – why wouldn’t he look at me like that?”

Allison and Kelsey exchanged a look. Allison seemed vaguely peeved by the question, and Kelsey shifted to face you head-on.

“Well,” she mused, cocking her head. “You’re in the friend zone. Guys like Taehyung only see people in two ways: girlfriends or friends. You already chose your list – chose that long ago. You can move from date-able to friends, but not the other way around.”

When she said this, you frowned. “That doesn’t sound right. Why?”

Allison only laughed, as Kelsey sighed. “Why, do you like him?” she asked, not very kindly. “Y/N, with an unrequited crush on her best friend. Awkward,” she tutted, “since I overhead from Jimin that Taehyung has plans to ask out Ali.”

“Really?” gasped Allison, while your eyes widened.

Though you remained silent, your head was spinning. Taehyung and Allison made no sense. He’d never even mentioned her, let alone said that he liked her – but then you hesitated. Jimin was Taehyung’s other best friend, so if he said he liked Allison, it was probably true. The thought made your stomach churn, words stuck in your throat.

Allison squealed, demanded to hear more details but you were still focused on Kelsey. You stared for a moment, horror sinking into you. If Taehyung liked Allison – you nearly laughed at the thought. What the hell were you doing? You must have misread things, when you thought that he liked you. All this time you’d been thinking of him, and he’d been thinking of your friend.

“I don’t like him,” you declared, overly loud. “I was just confused, that’s all.”

“You sure?” Kelsey tilted her head. “You don’t like Taehyung, not even a little? What if,” her gaze flicked up, over your shoulder, “he asked you out on a date? Would you say no?”

Your cheeks felt like they were on fire. You knew Kelsey was goading you, being a jerk to you on purpose but couldn’t help your reaction.

“Yes,” you ground out, spat through your teeth. “I would say no. Taehyung is my friend, nothing more than that – he’s literally the last person on the planet I would date. He’s not my type at all. I could care less if he asked me out.”

“Huh.” Kelsey leaned back and shrugged. “Fine. I guess you don’t like him.”

You just glared, breathing heavily – until the chair beside you dragged backwards and Taehyung flopped down, throwing his navy pencil case onto the table. He looked your way, offering a smile and watched unblinkingly while your heart sunk to your shoes. For a long, horrible moment, you imagined he’d heard. You thought that he had and, even though he didn’t like you that way – the thought alone was horrifying.

Then Taehyung grinned, the gesture casual – and your shoulders sunk down from your ears. He didn’t know, didn’t hear Kelsey insinuate you liked him. Crossing both arms, Taehyung propped both his feet on the bench and nodded, “What’s up,” he said to Kelsey and Allison.

That was the first moment.

The second moment came a week later. The end of school bell always rang at 3:10 PM and although your locker was a few hallways down from Taehyung’s, the two of you always met at his to walk home from school. Your parents insisted on this, since the subway was dangerous, even during day.

As soon as the last bell rang, you gathered your things from your locker and began the long trek down to Taehyung’s. He wasn’t there and, frown tugging at your lips, you began searching the neighboring hallways. You found him outside the guy’s locker room, surrounded by a group of boys he didn’t normally hang out with.

His shoulder was touching the cinderblock wall and Taehyung ran one hand absently through his hair. Walking closer, you clutched your books tight to your chest, about to tap him on the shoulder – when you saw what he was looking at and your hand fell to your side. You forgot the situation entirely, squinting your gaze through the crowd.

They were looking at a locker, the entire inside of which was covered in some sort of diagram. A pyramid, each row containing a girl’s face. The guys were arguing about it loudly, some of them rather heatedly.

“No! Jenna should be above Margot, below Jordan,” Jeff shook his head. “How can you even argue? Jenna has the whole ‘girl next door’ thing going for her – beyond hot.”

At this, Lou scoffed. “Please, ‘girl next door’ is overrated. If that vibe were so hot, then Y/N would be rated number one.”

At this, several guys laughed and you recoiled upon hearing your name. After following Lou’s finger down the map to the board – you finally found your name three rows down from the top. Eyes widening, you finally understood what you were seeing.

A ranking. It was Hawthorn High’s Hot One Hundred, based on the sole factor of fuckability.

“Yeah,” Bruce laughed, shaking his head. “Y/N is like, you know, I’d bang her. Sure, I would. But I’d fuck Allison ten times before that.”

Cheeks coloring, you took a step back. Hearing him say that about you was like a punch to the gut and you looked down at your body, wondering what about it was wrong. Maybe you didn’t dress super trendy or know what to do with your makeup – you were pretty though, you thought, or that’s what you’d been told.

“Let’s ask Taehyung,” Jeff declared, turning. “You’re her best friend. Who would you bang – Y/N or Allison?”

Taehyung hesitated.

You couldn’t see his expression from where you were standing, but he ran a hand though his hair. Taehyung only did that when he was either nervous or lying.

“I,” he started to say, then stopped. “Fuck.” Taehyung exhaled. “You can’t ask me a question that.”

Lower lip trembling, you swallowed – hard. You no longer wanted to hear his answer to the question and you turned, about to leave when Bruce’s next words froze your feet to the floor.

“Come on,” he laughed, overly loud. “Taehyung isn’t impartial. Everyone knows he’s so far up Y/N’s butt, he can’t see straight.”

The moment he said this, the other guys laughed. Bristling, you whirled around because even angry, even embarrassed – they couldn’t talk to Taehyung like that.

Taehyung’s shoulders stiffened and he shoved himself off the wall. “I am not,” he muttered. “I don’t give a fuck about her like that. We’re not dating, Y/N doesn’t like me that way. And I don’t like her, she’s not my type. Allison,” he nodded, turning around.

Taehyung’s eyes widened when he saw you.

The second your eyes met, yours filled with tears – and you just turned around and ran. From behind you came several oooo’s and Taehyung, you’re in trouble, but you just kept running in the opposite direction. Taehyung’s face was plastered across your corneas, that mental image of him, frozen in shock and horror.

You didn’t care about that. It meant nothing compared to what you felt.

Your books were tossed somewhere along the way. In order to lose him, you hid in one of the unused choir rooms until your mom came to get you from school. The entire way to your house, you refused to explain to her what was wrong. You just said Taehyung had to leave, and you didn’t want to ride the subway alone. Your mother eventually decided it was easier to accept this as the reason.

The next day at school, you avoided him like the plague. You also did this the day following, and the next. This kept going until Taehyung eventually stopped trying. Until the two of you became strangers, ones who barely nodded at each other when they passed in the halls. You forgot what it meant to know him. To understand him. This way was better though, because without Taehyung around, the sting of rejection was only a memory. An unpleasant memory, a hurtful one – but just a memory, nonetheless.

Until your parents brought you both together and you were forced into marrying him.

Glancing at him in the car, you see Taehyung’s lips are held tight in his anger. The streetlights flicker over him every few seconds, casting orange stripes upon the skin of his face. Taehyung has grown up well, it can’t be denied. He’s an adult now, as are you. The growth happened separately though, both of you becoming people no longer capable of recognizing the other.

If any feelings remain between the two of you, they’re bitter. Splintered friendship and hurtful words; youthful, unrequited feelings of love.

Exhaling softly, you return to your window. It’s the reason you often behave like enemies; speaking to each other in snipped words, masked emotion, sidelong glances. To act like you hate another is better than admitting the real reason – that you once meant the world, and now you do not.

Ironically enough, the outside world thinks it’s opposite.

Taehyung doesn’t bother to say goodnight. He sweeps up the stairs ahead of you, tie already off in one hand. You follow behind him, already mentally pouring yourself a cup of tea. It’s hard for you to sleep without it.

Once in your room, you slowly remove your jewelry. Unfastening earrings one by one to lay them out on the table. You stare at these for a moment, realizing they’re the ones you wore at your wedding. For most, you suppose this would be a happy memory. For you, it only brings to mind recollections of concealer and red-reducing eye drops. Makeup tricks by professionals, to hide how you cried the night before.

When you were younger, you imagined yourself getting married; imagined yourself as a bride, as a wife. The idea wasn’t always appealing to you, but sometimes it was. Even when you were younger, you imagined yourself to be in love. The concept of crying on your wedding day was limited to seeing your husband at the end of the aisle. You thought you might cry happy tears, excited tears.

Not tears of knowing you’d given everything up.

You wore a long veil that day. A veil which entirely covered your face, one Taehyung only removed to kiss you once at the altar. His expression was as tortured as yours, face just as ashy and when you kissed, it was just a swift peck of the lips. This, before he brought the veil down, shroud-like, over your eyes.

That was the first and only time you kissed. Well, that’s not true. You’ve kissed before in public, when the occasion demands it. Like tonight, when Taehyung brushed his lips to your shoulder; or on holidays, when mistletoe tends to appear and kissing is expected. Never in private, though. Never alone.

Exhaling loudly, you cross into your bathroom and wash first your face, then your teeth and body. Readying yourself for bed, your eyes are already fluttering with exhaustion. It’s been a long day, a tiresome day because it’s draining, to pretend to be happy. As you curl into your large, King-sized bed and stare out of your window – you try your best not to cry.

It’s early the next morning, when your alarm goes off. Rolling half-asleep from bed, you pad into the bathroom to pull on the first sweatpants you can find. The walk to the gym is cool, silent, only the streetlights breaking through the mist at your ankles.

Hiking your bag higher, you exhale out at the fog. Working out in the morning helps you to think, clears your thoughts and lets you start anew. You begin at the treadmill, running until you start to sweat. Until your breath labors and then you stop, moving on to the weights. Today is arms and abs, concentrating on these and ignoring the presence of everyone around you. You turn up the volume of your headphones, blast your eardrums into a dull sense of obscurity.

The movements sooth you, therapeutic and by the time you’re done, last night is nothing more than a dull, nagging ache. It still exists, still is hurtful – but not so much as before. Filling your thermos with hot water, you stick your capsule of tea inside and when you leave the gym, the sun is just starting to rise. It’s beautiful, peachy hues melting into the blue – and your phone goes off at your side, buzzing hard in your pocket.

Taehyung: Hello, Y/N. Just reminding you of our semi-weekly lunch. I’ll swing by your office around noon to pick you up, okay? [7:04 AM]

You exhale, walking fast towards your building. Every other week, you and Taehyung go out for lunch. It keeps up appearances – real life husbands and wives do things like that. Dates. Fingers flying over your keyboard, you send Taehyung a text back.

Y/N: That still works. I have a quarterly update meeting until noon. I can meet you in the lobby after that. [7:06 AM]

Taehyung: Sounds good. See you then. [7:07 AM]

Throwing your phone in your pocket, you push open your building’s front door. Lately, work has been the one place which feels like home. Your childhood home stopped feeling that way the moment your father demanded you marry. Nor does your current apartment feel homey; it’s still just a place you share with a stranger. No, work is the only place left which has even the tiniest semblance of yourself.

Walking through the lobby, you fish in your bag for your badge. This morning is your quarterly update meeting. A checkpoint where you review the numbers of last quarter’s G&A (General and Administrative) expenses, then forecast them out for the remainder of the year. It should be easy, considering you’re predicting the company will come in several million dollars under budget. This, due to excellent business controls on your end and above-average sales from the business side.

The first half of the morning is spent preparing, going over your notes with team members, since this will be your first time presenting to the executives alone. You’re nervous about this, which irks you. There’s nothing to be nervous about, and yet – sometimes nerves defy logic, sometimes things are scary enough simply due to their enormity.

As you’re entering the meeting your co-worker, Tim, catches you by the elbow. “You’ll be great,” he stage-whispers, smiling widely. “I know you know this, just thought you might want to hear it from someone else.”

You freeze, until he withdraws. Tim is good-looking, in that all-American kind of way, with dark brown hair and grey eyes. He can be overly flirty, but right now all you feel towards him is gratitude. As illogical as it sounds, it is nice to be appreciated. In an ideal world, your opinion would be enough. Your success would be enough, your self-worth would be enough.

This is the real world though, and humans crave the attention and approval of others. It’s nice to feel someone notices – even if it’s not the person whose approval you crave. Thinking this, you hesitate. It’s not that you crave Taehyung’s approval. He’s not even the person you’re thinking of – you don’t know where his name, his face came from when you thought that.

Brushing this aside, you smile at Tim. “Thanks,” you respond, walking into the meeting. “Hope this goes well,” you nod, taking a seat.

Still, you can’t force Taehyung’s face from your mind. It meant nothing, just a remnant of a memory since you recently thought about high school. That memory dredged up feelings, that’s all. The memory of Taehyung as a friend, a crush – the thought makes your heart twist, but it’s been a long time since then. Swallowing, you look down at your computer screen.

Tim nudges your side. “I think your phone just buzzed,” he whispers. The last people are now entering, chatting eagerly about next quarter’s promotions. “You might want to turn it off before the meeting.”

“Thanks,” you nod, reaching for your phone and checking its settings. You freeze at the sight, reading the name that’s displayed.

Taehyung: Good luck this morning. I know you’ll kill it. [10:29 AM]

You don’t have time to digest the message before your CEO walks in. Hastily clicking the power button, you slide your phone back in your pocket.

The meeting is long. Staring at the clock on your laptop, you tap your foot impatiently against the ground. Your portion of the meeting went well – great, even. Your CEO only had a few follow-up questions, all of which were easily answered. She even went so far as to smile – a practically unheard-of affirmation. Tim squeezed your knee, at that.

HR is presenting right now and the company isn’t as far along with training as it should be, meaning some people are now struggling to come up with answers. The argument drags on, currently five after noon. If you know Taehyung – and you do know Taehyung – he’s probably shifting impatiently in the lobby.

Taehyung is many things, but patient is not one of them. You likely have one more minute before he decides to come upstairs himself. Taehyung knows everyone in this city, it wouldn’t be hard for him to get a visitor’s badge but it’s just as you think this, the CEO stands. Shaking her head, she suggests a follow-up meeting to solve the unresolved issue. Everyone agrees, and they begin to file out.

You’re one of the last to go, since Tim keeps you behind with his questions. Mostly on the presentation, but he keeps leaning in awfully close to you while he talks. One of his hands keeps on touching your elbow – you glance down at this while you speak, barely containing your surprise. Staring for a moment, you glance back at his face but Tim appears earnest, eyes wide with sincerity and you wonder briefly if you’re just making too big a deal.

It’s nice to feel appreciated, but as far as Tim knows, you’re married. He’s standing very close to you right now, given that fact. Close enough for him to see the vintage gold band sitting tight on your finger and despite knowing you’re a married woman, he’s acting awfully, well –

“Baby!” Taehyung calls, sauntering into the room.

You look up, startled by his presence and Tim springs away, cheeks flushed with embarrassment. When he meets the gaze of your husband, a knot loosens in your stomach, eased by Taehyung’s arrival.

This is strange, since usually it’s the sight of your husband which curls your stomach in knots. Rushing to greet him, you meet Taehyung in the center of the room.

“Hi, sweetie,” you smile and for the first time you can remember, the gesture is genuine.

Taehyung smiles back but when he looks over your shoulder, his gaze hardens.

“Kim Taehyung,” he says, reaching out a hand. He and Tim greet each other like this, their gesture brisk. “So, you’re the man keeping my wife from our lunch.”

Tim blinks, his face gone suddenly slack. You really can’t blame Tim for his reaction; Taehyung tends to have that effect on people. In addition to his father being the chief of police, Taehyung owns the same company he works for. Software engineering, some tool he developed while serving in the military which tracks foreign fluctuations of currency. Nearly every business in the world uses it, now.

Taehyung continues to smile, though the gesture doesn’t quite meet his gaze.

“Mr. Kim.” Tim nods. “Tim Carmichael. I was just debriefing with Y/N after our meeting. She led a very successful presentation, you should be proud of her,” he adds, a slight edge to his voice.

Your eyebrows shoot up. It’s bold of Tim to issue a challenge to Taehyung. Because that’s what he just did – issue a challenge. From the way Tim stares at Taehyung, from the way the latter stares back – well, you’re just surprised nobody has whipped out their dick yet.

Taehyung arches a brow. “I am proud,” he nods, keeping his tone light. “I sent Y/N a text saying as much. Did you get my message, darling?” he asks, glancing sideways.

Stifling a smile, you nod. “I did indeed, buttercup.”

The corner of Taehyung’s lip twitches at the nickname. “Excellent. Well.” Returning to Tim, he nods. “It was great to meet you, Jim.”

Without waiting to be corrected, Taehyung tugs you out of the conference room. You let him do so, laptop held tight to your chest as you mouth goodbye in the direction of Tim.

“Let me just put this in my office,” you say, and Taehyung nods.

“I’ll come with.”

You’re surprised by this, but you agree. It’s the first time Taehyung has asked about anything to do with your job, barring the random text he sent you this morning. As you walk down the hall, you’re acutely aware of his presence. His hand swings too close to yours, close enough that you could wrap your fingers around his, if you wanted. Not that you want that.

“Well,” you say, turning the corner. “This is it. My cubicle. It’s not that big, but I have a corner and a window – coveted real estate, in terms of the office.”

Taehyung doesn’t speak, wandering in. He looks around your cubicle, spotting the personal touches you’ve added. A hockey calendar, a vase full of (fake) flowers, a few brightly colored post-it notes and stamps. There’s a message written in blue sharpie, scribbled to read, “Y/N once ate twelve goldfish. No more, no less.”

Taehyung turns around. Plugging your laptop into its docking station, you watch him turn towards your bulletin board. Here, you’ve hung more messages, alongside the photos – two of them are of Taehyung; one is your official wedding photo, the one displayed in the lobby of your home. You both stand stiff and awkward, posed with forced smiles upon your faces.

The other though, was an impulse add. You aren’t entirely sure what made you do it, just that when you did, it felt wrong to remove it. The photographer took a lot candid shots that day, but only a few of them turned out well. This is one of those and it’s of Taehyung, though you’re unsure when during the night it was taken.

He looks off in the distance, staring at someone or something out on the dance floor. It’s funny, because all that night, you can barely remember your husband. All you remember is you, your own feelings; the pain that you felt, the fear that you had – all of your anger, your resentment. You always thought Taehyung felt the same but then there’s this photo, which seems to disprove that. He looks happy. More than that, he seems euphoric. Taehyung smiles at something, eyes and fingers gentle holding a glass of champagne.

His eyes are misty, that look you always dreamt your husband would have when you came down the aisle. It’s impossible to see what he’s looking at, though – you’ve tried often enough.

Taehyung lifts a hand to touch the edge of the photo.

“I,” you hesitate, looking over his shoulder. “I thought it might be good for appearances.”

When you speak, Taehyung stiffens and he looks back over his shoulder. “Sure. Makes sense.” He says nothing more, just sticks his hands back in his pockets. “Ready for lunch?”

Nodding, you pull your purse higher. “Lead the way.”

When Taehyung leaves, you follow, wondering what – if anything – just happened,

Lunch is odd.

Taehyung isn’t rude to you, nor is he cold. He seems distracted though, which is the strange part. He even leaves the table at some point, claiming a work call – something he almost never does and when he returns, Taehyung is almost pleasant to converse with.

“You got my text, right?” he asks, around a mouthful of chicken.

You nod, cutting into your plate. “Yes. Thank you. That was,” you quirk a brow. “Unexpected.”

“Yeah,” Taehyung looks down. “What was that you said in your office? About appearances? Got to keep them up.”

“Right,” you nod and you would let it go – but, “keep up appearances by sending a text to my cell phone?” you respond, arching a brow.

Taehyung blushes, shrugging it off. “There’s a function this weekend our parents want us to attend.”

He’s changing the subject, but you let him. “Perfect,” you nod, setting down your fork. “What disease or third-world country will be helped by our raffle tickets now?”

“Ah, no,” Taehyung wags a finger, fighting back a smile. “By silent auction, this time. Much more helpful.”

He rolls his eyes, and you know he agrees. Taehyung has traveled the world, served in those very troops the auctions try to help – you know privately, he holds a much different opinion than his parents. Even when you were friends, he was like that. Taehyung was a part of every club, forum and relief effort. That’s just who Taehyung is, what he’s like – loud, opinionated and overall, a good person.

At least, you used to think that was so. Staring down at your drink, you gently stir the ice cubes and Taehyung’s gaze follows the motion. “What are you thinking?” he asks.

You look up, startled. “I,” you start to say – then stop, when the waiter approaches your table.

“Mr. Kim,” he bows. “I have a man on line one for you. Would you like to take the call here, or on your cell?”

Taehyung frowns, placing his napkin on the table. “About what we spoke on earlier?” The man nods, and Taehyung stands. “I’ll be just a minute,” he explains, before leaving.

He’s gone for longer than a minute. You think he’s forgotten about you, gone for so long you finish your food and finally, you signal the waiter for the check. “Could you place this on my card,” you ask sweetly, handing over the object. “My husband was pulled away on urgent business, and I need to return to the office.”

“Of course,” the other water nods, taking the object. “Right away, Mrs. Kim.”

You sigh, watching him go and Taehyung returns just as you’re signing the check. His gaze darkens at the sight. “What are you doing?” he demands.

“Paying,” you mutter, adding a flourish. “There. All set,” you stand, smiling back at him. “Ready to go?”

Taehyung glances, dumbfounded, from his empty plate to yours. “I – no? Where’s my lunch?”

“Here,” you grin, handing over the white paper bag you’re holding. “I had them wrap it up. Now let’s go, I can’t be late for my 1:30.”

“You,” Taehyung starts to say but when you walk past the table, he follows. “Fuck, Y/N. You could have at least put it on my tab. You didn’t have to pay.”

“I’m perfectly capable of paying,” you respond stiffly, shoving open the door. “I’m not destitute, thank god.”

Taehyung places a hand on your back, putting on his public-facing smile. “That’s not what I meant,” he hisses, eyes flashing. “I know you do well for yourself. I’m your husband, though. It’s my duty to provide for –"

“Duty?” you snort, whirling around to face him. Taehyung’s eyes widen, nose only inches way. “It’s also your duty, to consummate our marriage. Do you want to do that too, husband?”

Taehyung raises a brow, as though fighting back laughter. “Yes. I do.”

Rolling your eyes, you push past. “Oh, fuck off,” you mutter, walking away.

Taehyung follows, catching up to you easily. “If you’d like, we can fuck off together,” he suggests cheerfully.

Your cheeks color, though you try and hide it. “Like you’d even be able to get up.”

From the corner of your eye, Taehyung freezes. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Look,” you sigh, turning around. You’re standing in front of your building, steps away from the entrance and Taehyung looks at you, genuinely baffled. This is dangerous territory; too close to high school, your friendship and the day things went wrong. “Just forget what I said,” you exhale, shaking your head. “See you tonight.”

You don’t wait for his response before entering security. Taehyung doesn’t follow, but you didn’t expect him to and your stomach sinks, while the elevator climbs. Entering your cubicle, you throw your bag onto your chair, staring up at the board and that picture of Taehyung.

You don’t know why you feel embarrassed, it’s just a photo, but when you reach up to yank it down, you find your hand hesitating. You can’t do it and very slowly, you turn back around. Rubbing your temples, you stare blankly at your computer and try not to think about why.

When your screen turns on, you see you have several missed emails, requests which eat up the majority your afternoon. Between one task and the next, all thoughts of Taehyung fall from your mind and it’s much later that day, when you get a ping from a friend, your co-worker, Mo.

Clicking the open button, you quickly scan her message – eyes widening, as you scan it again.

Mo: Did you hear Tim is switching departments?? He’s starting in HR, effective immediately. [4:10 PM]

Y/N: what??? Are you sure? [4:12 PM]

Mo: Yep. His desk is already moved and everything. I think it’s to help with that training project? Idk for sure, though. [4:14 PM]

Y/N: whoa. Crazy. Gahhh, this is going to suck. Without Tim our team will have to pick up so much slack. [4:15 PM]

Mo: lol “our team” – meaning, you. [4:17 PM]

Y/N: yep [4:18 PM]

When your boss enters the cubicle, you shut the chat. He exhales. “So. You’ve heard about Tim, huh?”

You nod, and the two of you proceed to talk for the next hour. What holes Tim will leave, how to best cover the work until you find a replacement. By the time your boss leaves, it’s nearly time to go home and you rub at your eyes, shaking your head side to side. It’s too much to think about for tonight, so you pack up. Throwing both laptop and charger into your bag, slinging this and your gym bag over your shoulder.

Taehyung works late, so you don’t see him it all.

This weekend’s function is even dressier than the last; full-length gowns and tuxedos only. When you walk into the foyer, moving slow due to your heels, Taehyung is already waiting for you at the bottom.

He glances up, hearing movement – then stills, one hand slow on his cuff links.

“Wow,” he murmurs when your right heel touches wood.

You falter, uncertain what to do with the compliment. You’re aware you look good, or at least you think that you do. You’ve always thought you were fairly attractive; it’s Taehyung who never has. He’s looking at you now though with an expression that’s hard to decipher.

When you walk closer, he holds out a hand. “A beautiful dress,” he states, forcing your heart to sink.

A beautiful dress, not that you’re beautiful. Nodding, you accept his hand. “Let’s go,” you mutter.

Tonight’s function is much like the others. Another beautiful ballroom full of bored inhabitants. Taehyung is correct – this time it’s an auction, one you listlessly bid at. You stare at the numbers on the page, then set the pen down to the side and turning into the crowd, you scan the room. Taehyung is here, somewhere but after the requisite couple introductions, the two of you broke apart. He went to socialize with the businessmen and left you to socialize with the wives. Gritting your teeth, you accept a passing glass of champagne.

Tonight there’s a band instead of the usual quartet. The music is livelier and shockingly enough, there are actual people dancing, which is rare, at events like these. When you finish your first glass of champagne, you grab another, wandering to the edge o the dance floor to sip quietly and watch the colors whirl by.

Bitterness tinges your glass; something you swirl and swallow along with your pride. You want that, too – you want a partner, someone to dance with. Someone who cares for you, who you care for back. Someone who – cutting off that though, you look down at your drink.

Once upon a time, you thought Taehyung could be that person. When you were still young, still naïve and hopeful. Back before you’d kissed anyone, dated anyone, had sex, or fucked or made love to anyone. Before all that, there was Taehyung.

Maybe that’s why you’re bitter. Maybe that’s why you can’t look him in the face, can’t touch his hand without anger tightening your chest. Maybe it’s not anger at all but the fact that you once thought Taehyung would be yours, and he is – but not entirely. Having him as a husband is like a pill, one which both of you hate to swallow. Seeing him in your home is a constant reminder that he’s only there because he was forced.

You’re reaching for your third glass of champagne when a hand closes over your wrist.

“I think that’s enough,” Taehyung interrupts, gently pulling your body to his.

Blinking upwards, you suck in your breath. He’s beautiful – you hate that.

“You don’t own me, Kim Taehyung,” you mutter, throwing his hand from your wrist to push past. “It’s not like my father gave you seven herds of cattle in exchange for my hand.”

Taehyung lets you walk away, then waits a moment before following. “11 million dollars? I think not,” he says, grabbing the next glass you try to consume. He tips this backwards, draining it all in one gulp. “He did give me your hand, though. And I gave you mine.”

This makes you pause, turning to look at him. Maybe it’s the champagne, or maybe you’re just fed up but for some reason, you take a step closer.

“You gave me your hand?” You tilt your head. “Gave implies consent, desire. From what I remember, I’m not your type of girl.”

There’s a bite to your words, years of repressed anger and hurt layered between them. Confusion flashes across Taehyung’s features and he frowns, stepping forward. It’s strange, you think, tilting your head back to see him. You’re not sure when he got to be so tall.

“Are you fucking Tim,” Taehyung says, voice low.

“What?” The thought is so absurd, you can’t help but laugh. “Why would you even ask me that?”

Taehyung tilts his head to one side. “Answer the question. Are you sleeping with Tim?”

“No,” you sputter – then freeze, realization dawning. “Are you – are you saying you fuck other people?”

Taehyung’s eyes widen. “Other,” he repeats, looking away. His expression is bitter. “Kind of hard to fuck others, Y/N, when we’re not having sex in the first place.”

His words are like a slap and you visibly recoil.

“Shit,” you exhale. The word is cold, hard – entirely unlike yourself. “Fine,” you demand, scanning the dance floor. “I should’ve assumed. We’re married, but only in public – right? In private, we can do what we want. I guess I should catch up. Hm,” you muse, thoughtful. “Who should I ask, I wonder? Maybe Yoongi, he’s hot. Imagine what his face would look like, between my thighs. Or maybe Jimin. He looks like he knows how to fu–"

Taehyung growls, pulling you sideways. Ducking into an alcove, you find your back pressed to the wall while his hands find your hips. “Don’t,” he gasps, squeezing his eyes shut. “Don’t say things like that.”

“Taehyung,” you stare at him in concern. “What are you –"

He cuts you off when he kisses you.

Whatever protest you had dies on your lips as your mouth parts beneath his. Kissing Taehyung is like kissing fire; wild, unbridled and entirely out of control. His hands roam everywhere, his lips molten and needy. He presses you backwards and, not caring about lipstick, drags your lower lip between his teeth.

Your knee is yanked roughly upwards, your chest flush to his. Taehyung rolls his hips against you, letting you know exactly what he’s thinking while his mouth drops to your neck. He sucks, pulling skin between his teeth as you gasp out his name. He seems frustrated, agitated – and you’re equally pissed.

“Goddamn Yoongi,” Taehyung growls, hips thrusting. “Or Jimin. You think either of them can fuck you better than I can?” His lips slide down the curve of your throat. “You think either of them can make you come like I could?”

“I wouldn’t know,” you groan, head hitting the wall. “We’ve never even kissed before tonight.”

“And whose fault,” Taehyung exhales, kissing up your neck, “is that?”

Before you can ask what he means by this, he returns to your lips. His next kiss is harsh, unyielding while his hands slide down your body. Taehyung groans, cupping your ass and pressing himself to you, hard and wanting between your legs.

“Home,” he mutters, pulling away. “I hate that dress.”

You don’t disagree, following him on the dance floor.

Taehyung pulls you before him, speaking low in your ear. “You’re my wife,” he mutters, erection digging into your hip. “If you need to be fucked, I’ll do it.”

“I swear to god,” you hiss back, voice rising. “If you say that I belong to you – one more time.”

“You belong to me,” Taehyung says softly, before shoving open the doors to the night.

He tugs you with him, barely pausing before he’s clicking the keys in one hand. Taehyung scans the parking lot, tugging hard on your grip.

“What, no smart remark,” he murmurs, nibbling on your ear. His hand splays flat on your stomach, inching it’s way lower.

You spin around, pushing him until his back hits the wall. As you slide your hands into his hair, you kiss him fiercely; body arching to make him feel the full extent of your need. Taehyung moans, the noise harsh while you tug at his hair. Sliding your tongue into his mouth, you open him further – and then pull back abruptly, walking away down the steps.

Taehyung chuckles from behind, the noise dark and doesn’t follow at first – before cursing softly and pushing off of the wall. At the side of the car, Taehyung waits until you’re inside, like always. Then he enters on the driver’s side, getting in to lock the doors.

“Listen,” he growls, placing the car in reverse.

You press your legs together. “Yes?”

“I’m going to get us home,” he explains, arching a brow. “Fast. While I do that, I want you to suck me off. Can you do that for me, baby?”

Though your eyes widen, you shift in your seat. “You… what?”

Taehyung looks over at you, smirks. “I want my cock down your throat. Does that sound good, darling?”

Maintaining eye contact, you slide one hand up your body. Undoing your up-do, you let your hair fall to your shoulders and upon seeing Taehyung’s eyes darken, you bend your head forward. Without saying a word, you undo the zipper of his pants and find Taehyung already hard, straining against the confines of his navy boxer-briefs. You inhale at the sight, sliding a hand up his shaft before pulling down his boxers entirely.

Leaning down, you gently take the tip of his cock in your mouth. Just the head, nothing more. You suck on this gently, teasing his slit while Taehyung groans, his head hitting the seat.

“Fuck,” he hisses as you move lower.

When you let him in deeper, you relax your jaw just enough that his cock finds the back of your throat.

“God, yes,” he mumbles, hands clenched on the steering wheel. Taehyung’s eyes narrow in concentration. “Fuck, your mouth is so amazing. You’re so good at sucking cock.”

At this, you pull back. Sliding off with a pop, you settle back to your side of the car and Taehyung looks up, alarmed. Then down, at his rock hard cock. “What the –"

“I’ll finish you when we get home,” you smirk, batting your eyelashes. “That’s what you get, for saying I belong to you.”

Taehyung’s hands tighten, accidentally jerking the wheel. He straightens the car out, glaring in your direction.

“When we get home,” he says to you quietly. “I’m going to fuck you so hard, you won’t be able to walk in the morning. I’m going to eat you out until you can’t remember your own name. I won’t let you come, though,” he announces, switching gears. “No. You won’t come until your tight, little pussy is wrapped around my cock. Until I’m fucking you into your headboard and you’re begging for release.”

Arching a brow, you meet his gaze. “I’ll never beg, Kim Taehyung.”

A wicked smile crosses his lips. “We’ll see.”

Taehyung parks in the garage. Sliding into the last spot and unbuckling his seat belt. “Outside,” he demands, and you obey – but only because you want to.

Leisurely stepping from the car, you saunter towards the elevators and Taehyung catches you halfway, pulling you against his chest. He slides both hands down your body and you bite your lip in response. He’s hard enough that you groan, swatting his arm.

“Taehyung,” you scold, pushing past.

He lets you, following close behind and the second the elevator doors close, you’re the one attacking him. You shove him backwards, kissing him hungrily, hurriedly. One of your hands slides to his balls, your lips moving in tandem as Taehyung shoves his hips forward, grabbing hold of your hand when the elevator dings.

He walks you both backwards, continuing to kiss as you enter the foyer. Taehyung isn’t gentle, isn’t soft – but neither are you. You’re pushing the jacket from his shoulders, tugging at his cummerbund and throwing this on the ground. Taehyung is just as needy, insistently pushing you up towards the stairs.

“Turn around,” he demands, waiting until you obey. When you grab the banister, bending over, he groans out loud. Taehyung steps forward to press his cock to your ass. “Do you feel how hard I am,” he murmurs, lips moving from neck to nape. “Do you see,” he breathes, fingers tugging at your hidden zipper, “how fucking crazy you make me?”

He flips you over, sliding the straps down your shoulders until silken material pools on the floor. Your dress is floor-length and beneath it, you’re wearing the requisite lingerie. Lace; skimpy enough that Taehyung’s pupils to dilate, hands shaking while they slide down your body.

“Fuck,” he mutters, lip held between his teeth.

His own shirt is forgotten, but no longer. Your fingers make quick work of the buttons, tugging this back – and you pause. It’s been a long time since you’ve seen him like this. Of course you’ve seen Taehyung at pool parties and the gym, but this is different.

One other time comes to mind, back when the two of you were still sixteen. A time you barged into his house without asking, yelled hello to his mother and ran up the steps of his house to visit his room. You pulled open his door, not bothering to knock – and saw Taehyung, one hand down his pants, eyes scrunched up with pleasure as a soft groan fell from his lips.

You froze.

You weren’t supposed to be there, you knew that – but fuck, if you weren’t amazed by the sight. Seeing Taehyung like that sparked something within you, something dark, exciting and hot in your veins. You were embarrassed, yes, but it was more than all that. You felt warm, foreign, heavy with want, hazy with desire – until he opened his eyes.

They locked with yours for a second. Just one before you yelped and turned quickly away. Covering your face with both hands, you shook with laughter and nervousness while Taehyung nearly fell off his bed. The two of you decided it was best never to speak of it again. Best to ignore it entirely – but from that day forward, it was impossible. You kept on seeing him like that. His expression ecstatic, hands shifting, lips open.

Taehyung drops his shirt to the ground and then bends, picking you up by your thighs. He wraps your legs tightly around him as he walks up the stairs. His lips find your neck, sucking a hickey that has you grinding your hips. You enter the first bedroom on the landing – his bedroom – only to be deposited on top of his dresser. Taehyung takes a step closer, stopping between your legs to drag his thumb over your breast.

“What now,” he murmurs, not looking for an answer. His other hand yanks you closer, cupping your sex. “You’ve been naughty, Y/N,” he teases, finger slipping past your panties to push it’s way inside. “You were such a tease to me in the car – do you know what I do with teases?”

Shaking your head no, your fingers grip the edge of the dresser. Taehyung’s finger slides in and out, even while you grind yourself messily into the palm of his hand. Taehyung withdraws as you whimper, but then he drops to the ground; kneeling gently, to slide both hands up your legs.

He finds your panties, hooking both fingers to pull them lazily down and once they’re discarded on the floor, he spreads your legs. “What a pretty cunt,” he murmurs, kissing up your thigh. Taehyung bites, then kisses and then bites again. “I bet you’d like me to eat you out, yes?”

You glare at his head, refusing to give in. “If you like.”

Taehyung chuckles, pushing your knees apart. He doesn’t say anything, just kisses until – ah. You stifle your gasp, shifting your weight onto your hands. Taehyung begins gently, trailing soft circles around your sex. Easing you to him, warming you with his mouth before yanking you forward. His arms pin your legs to the dresser, forcing you still while his head buries between your thighs.

“Taehyung,” you gasp, as he eats you out. He flicks his tongue down, flattening and dragging. Interrupted only by the sucking and teasing, as his finger slides back to where you’re wet.

When he pushes this finger inside, you can’t help your noise. It feels too good, him brushing against your already-sensitized walls. It’s been so long since you’ve had sex and it’s just different with someone else. Different with the heat of his mouth, the roughness of tongue, the feel of his hands. Different with Taehyung grunting and groaning at every inch, glancing up occasionally with a smirk on his face.

He continues like this, finger fucking you, driving you crazy until you’re clenching around him. Until you’re whining, pressing your hips messily upwards and that’s when Taehyung pulls out to stand quick from the ground.

You freeze, body tight and trembling. The sudden loss of him is painful, dangerously close to your edge – and you let out a swear, followed by a string of vibrant curse words. “Kim Taehyung,” you hiss, pushing yourself up. “You better fucking get back down there. Or I swear to god.”

“Not so fun?” he smirks, unzipping his pants. You stare, when he drops these to the floor. Taehyung is hard, straining against his underwear while your mouth starts to water. “Suck my dick, and I’ll make you come.”

“No,” you say stubbornly, though you want to.

“Come on,” he whines, coming closer. His cock rubs your pussy through the fabric, making you groan. “Just a little, and then I’ll fuck you into oblivion. What way do you want it?” he murmurs, nose tracing your collarbone. He nips gently. “From behind, against the wall? Or on my bed, legs thrown over my shoulders?”

You stiffen, wanting all of this. Wanting all of that, all of him – and for a brief, fleeting moment, you wonder what you’re doing. Yes, you’re horny. Yes, you’re needy and really want to be fucked. But by Taehyung? By Kim Taehyung, your husband. It’s a horrible idea, awful – but somehow, you can’t find it within yourself to care.

You want this. Want him, have ever since you can remember. Perhaps, you realize, you’ve wanted him all along. Maybe another part of the reason you’re angry is because you like Taehyung. Still like him. Still want him, need him – and he doesn’t want or need you in return.

Tonight, he does though. Steeling yourself, you slide down from his dresser. “Stand,” you say softly, dropping to your knees. “I want you to stand, and if you can’t take it – too bad.”

Yanking his boxers lower, you watch his dick spring up. Taehyung stares, gaze lidded as you take him in your mouth. Lips wrapping around his cock, you ease your head back and he groans, fingers winding their way to your head.

“That’s it,” he murmurs, watching you suck him. “Just like that. God, you’re gorgeous, with your mouth full of cock. You know that, right?”

You know it’s just because you’re sucking his dick, because he likes dirty talk – but still, you let out a hum of pleasure. Taking him further, letting him deep throat – because the way Taehyung moans is too fucking hot.

“Shit,” Taehyung hisses, stomach taut with pleasure. “Yes – yes.”

You continue, twisting your lips as you suck, one hand coming up to cup his balls and after barely a few seconds, Taehyung is opening his eyes.

“Enough,” he growls, bending to lift you. “No more,” he mutters, unhooking your bra from your back. “No more clothes.”

Taehyung pulls you close, cupping your ass while his head drops to your breast. He teases your nipple with his tongue, rolling this with his teeth when his other hand slides between your legs. He forgoes one finger, sliding two inside while you press against him.

“Tae,” you whimper, biting down on his shoulder. “Please, just fuck me.”

He stills – and you realize you called him by his nickname. The nickname you used to use in high school and you freeze, hoping he didn’t notice – but the moment disappears quickly, Taehyung nodding in approval. He moves, pulling you with him to his bed and flopping down on his mattress, pushing himself back to cock a brow. “I want you to ride me,” he announces, locking his hands behind his head.

Taehyung stands erect, hard between his thighs. “Oh?” you respond archly. “You’re going to have to beg for that.”

He just laughs, licking his lips. Reaching for the end table, Taehyung pulls out a condom to undo the wrapper and returning to you, rolls this down his shaft.

“Or,” he murmurs, stroking himself. “You could just be a good girl, and come sit on my dick.”

Slowly, you walk closer; swaying your hips on purpose, watching Taehyung’s eyes follow.

“What will you give me,” you murmur, lowering yourself to his bed. You move until your hips hover over him, placing both hands on his shoulders to look him straight in the eyes. “Husband?”

His eyes darken, hand sliding in between your thighs. His thumb presses to your clit, watching you grind against him.

“I’ll make you come,” he says simply, capturing your lips. “All night,” he mutters, kissing down your neck. His hands find your hips, sliding back to your ass. “Just – please, Y/N. Please,” he whimpers.

A smile lifts your lips. “Since you asked so nicely.”

You sit. Taking him all in one motion, only to groan at the stretch. Taehyung hisses, his arms wrapping hastily around you and he shifts his hips, trying to move – but you shake your head no.

“Wait,” you gasp, swallowing hard. “I just – I just need a moment.”

He’s big. A fact which you knew, but this is different. His cock is hot, throbbing and you feel completely full. “Fuck,” you mutter, burying your head in his neck.

Taehyung’s arms hold you gently, fingers trailing the base of your neck. His lips touch skin, refusing to move until you look up.

“Okay?” he asks softly, concern evident.

You nod, lifting yourself higher – and then slowly, sink back down on his cock. “Oh,” you whimper, and Taehyung smiles.

He grabs hold of your hips, lifting you off him to slowly thrust up. It’s so full, so tight that you clutch him, Taehyung continuing to fuck you with slow, shallow thrusts. He moves until you’re pushing against him, dropping your body to his; moaning with need, with want, with him.

“Like that,” you whisper, dropping one hand between your legs. Helping yourself along, biting at your lip.

Taehyung hisses, flipping you over. “I can do that,” he murmurs, kissing roughly to thrust back in. It’s deep like this, his cock hitting your walls in a way he couldn’t before. You moan out his name, clutching him tighter, nails digging into his back while he fucks you.

Taehyung’s cock moves in and out, his hips rubbing your clit. He slides one hand beneath your knee, opening you further. Fucking you harder, sweat gathering on his brow as he continues to move. The headboard keeps hitting the wall, and you’re searching for something – anything – to brace yourself. Hands fisting in sheets, his hair, finally just him, Taehyung. You wrap yourself tightly around him, deciding you don’t care if he sees.

You don’t care about the consequences. Don’t care if he hates you afterwards. Don’t care that this is just sex, purely physical, because to you – nothing has ever felt this right. When Taehyung comes, his hand between your legs to get you off, you can’t help but moan his name. He chokes on something as well – it’s hard to hear, since his face is buried in your shoulders. His body shudders, shaking above as he empties himself entirely.

When he’s done, when it’s just the sounds of your breathing and bodies in the room – the two of you look at one another. Taehyung exhales, rolling from his bed to go into his bathroom. He cleans himself up, brings out a towel for you and you clean yourself as well, turning to look at him – only to find him fast asleep.

You stare at him for a moment, his head soft on the pillow. He’s snoring, so you lower yourself down in his sheets; sliding closer, you watch his chest rise and fall with his breath. He looks so gentle, so beautiful. You can’t help but want to stay beside him.

It’s while you’re debating whether or not you should, you fall asleep.

You wake up in the middle of the night, or perhaps it’s near morning. It’s hard to tell, since Taehyung sleeps with his blinds closed. You wake up so suddenly, one moment you’re dreaming and the next – well, it still feels like you’re dreaming. Taehyung’s head lies on the pillow, eyelids fluttering with whatever dream he’s having.

You lift a finger and, before you can think twice, move to touch him – only to freeze, within an inch of his cheekbone. You want to kiss him, but can’t. Taehyung doesn’t belong to you.

People should only touch that which belongs to them. And Taehyung, despite the paperwork which says otherwise, is not yours. Stomach sinking, you bring your hand back to your chest.

You’re his, though.

As you stare at him, tears blur your vision. You’ve never stopped belonging to him, even when he didn’t want you to. You never stopped wanting him, not in the deepest parts of yourself. You want the boy he once was, the man he is now. It’s all one and the same to you, it’s all Taehyung and – realizing this, you slip quietly from bed.

Feet padding across the floor, you wish you had more of your clothing. As it is, you walk naked. It’s a good representation of your feelings, you realize, tiptoeing into the hall in nothing but your undergarments pressed to your chest.

Your room is only a few steps away. A few steps, though it may as well be an eternity because inside of your room, you lean your head to the door. Taking a deep breath in, you let yourself cry. Nodding at yourself in the mirror, you throw your clothes down on the floor. Tonight, you’ll let yourself break apart.

And tomorrow, you’ll build yourself anew.

Taehyung is already at the kitchen table when you go down for breakfast. He’s sitting aimlessly, looking up when you enter to pour yourself a cup of coffee, legs crossed beneath the chair while reading the newspaper. Taehyung is one of the few people left in this world who still enjoys the feel of actual ink and paper. Who still likes to hold one in the morning, creasing the pages and smoothing the words.

When you say nothing, he looks down at the page.

“Morning,” you venture, busying yourself with the coffee maker.

“Morning.”

That’s it. When you turn around to look at him, he’s not looking at you. Taehyung stares at his paper, expression carefully cultivated and everything you wanted to say to him dies in your throat. After crying yourself to sleep last night, you wondered if maybe you were just being stupid. If maybe he felt the same, if Taehyung’s feelings for you have changed since high school.

Now you realize how foolish this was. Taehyung has never been interested and the way he’s acting now just confirms this. Likely, he feels embarrassed, regretful and when you recognize those signs, you slam the coffee pot down on the counter.

“Have a good day,” you choke, before leaving.

Taehyung clicks on his jazz music when you go.

Monday, at work, you’re in a foul mood. Not just because of the events of this weekend, though that contributes to it a good deal. Mostly, you’ve managed to compartmentalize, though. Mostly, you’ve managed to shove this horrid, gaping hole of yours aside.

You’ve done this for god knows how many years and, sighing deeply, you slide your face into your hands. A soft knock on your cubicle forces you to look up.

“Yes?” you blink, jerking upwards.

Mo peers back. When she sees you sitting, shoulders slumped and expression tortured, she arches a brow. “Bad timing?”

Shaking your head, you lean back in your chair. “Not at all. Sorry, I was just taking a break.”

Mo grins, entering quickly to collapse into your second chair. “Ugh,” she groans, sticking out her feet. “Why are Monday’s so fucking awful?”

“Mhm,” you nod, scanning your desk. “I know. Ever since Tim switched, it’s been chaotic.”

Mo leans forward and nods. “Totally. About that,” she whispers, voice dropping.

You look up, surprised by her tone. “Yeah?”

She arches a brow. “You can tell me, you know.”

This gives you pause, struggling to think of something you know. “I can… tell you, what?”

“Yeah,” Mo nods, as though you understand. “You can say it! I won’t tell, I was just curious, when I heard. I know how much of a dick Tim can be sometimes.”

“I,” you hesitate, brow furrowed. “Yeah, Tim can be a bit much. I – wait, what are you talking about?”

Mo freezes, her eyes wide. “You mean… you don’t know?”

“Know what?” you exclaim, then lower your voice. “Know what?”

Mo grimaces, sliding her tongue over the back of her teeth. “Well, this is awkward,” she winces. “I just – well, heard a rumor. I don’t know if it’s true, but since I heard Taehyung was the reason, I figured you would know.”

“I swear to god, if you don’t – ”

“I heard Taehyung is the reason Tim got transferred.”

Your hands freeze on your paper. The entire room swirls, Mo’s face fading in and out of view. “M-my Taehyung?” you stammer.

“Yeah,” Mo nods, eyebrows raised. “I figured, well – Tim is such a skeeze. I thought maybe he’d hit on you, and your husband went all White Knight on his ass. Maybe I’m wrong,” Mo adds, falsely bright. “Ah, sorry Y/N! I thought that you knew.”

“No,” you murmur, lost in thought. “I didn’t.”

Mo stays in your cubicle only a few minutes before leaving, probably sensing you’re distracted by this new piece of information. Once she’s gone, you sit, staring blankly at your computer. Taehyung had Tim switched to another department. Taehyung called in a favor, spoke to someone, did something – which resulted in Tim being transferred away.

But why? The only thing you can think of is that meeting before lunch. The one where Taehyung walked and saw Tim being too touchy. If that was it though, it doesn’t make sense. Your husband has never once cared about who you talked to before. Never cared who you saw, who you hung out with. It makes no sense for him to suddenly up and move Tim because he hit on you.

Then a light dawns, remembering the phone calls. It was unusual for Taehyung to speak on the phone at all, let alone twice in one meal. He values his personal time too highly, refuses to work when he’s with you. To do so twice, in one lunch. You frown.

Before you can stop yourself, you’re standing up from your chair. Tossing your laptop into your bag to text your boss that you’re sick and need to work from home but the moment you exit the building, you turn right instead of left. You exit the subway in the financial district, walking the one block north until you reach Taehyung’s building.

“Mrs. Kim,” the receptionist smiles, recognizing you. He looks down at his computer, then frowns. “I’m sorry – did you have lunch with your husband? I just pulled up his schedule and I don’t see it. I could be wrong, though.”

“Ah, no,” you hesitate, shifting your weight. Smoothing a crease in your outfit, you realizing how crazy this is. “I just need to drop something off in his office.”

When the receptionist arches a brow, you wince, realizing how it sounds.

He just nods though, bending to search for a visitor’s badge. “Here you go,” he smiles, handing it over. “You remember Mr. Kim’s office location, yes? Floor eighty; end of the hall and to the right.”

You nod, accepting the badge to hurry sideways. No, you don’t remember Taehyung’s office because you’ve never been here before. On the inside of the elevator, you start to second guess yourself. You’re reading too much into things. Taehyung might have done this as a misguided favor, saw you looking uncomfortable and... you steel yourself, straightening your spine. You’ll never know, if you don’t ask him.

The floors tick by while you stare at nothing and try to convince yourself this is still a good idea. The eightieth floor, when it opens, is quiet, elevator doors sliding shut to leave you alone in the hallway. Standing there for a moment, it takes a while to gather your courage before continuing to walk.

You see Taehyung’s office almost immediately, since it takes up nearly the entire length of the hall. The walls are solid, doors made of glass in large, imposing panels you stop at the entrance of. Taehyung sits at his desk on a phone call, his back to the doors facing over the city. You see his feet kicked up on a filing cabinet and can tell from his expression he’s agitated.

You can see this plainly when he runs a hand through his hair. Taehyung only does this when he’s nervous or lying and, heart sinking, you remember how easily you used to read him. How deeply you knew him and taking a deep breath, you knock once on his door.

Taehyung swivels and places his feet on the floor. He’s frowning, already holding up a finger – the universal sign for just a minute – but when sees that it’s you, he freezes. Speaking quickly, you’re not sure what he says before hanging up the phone.

Taehyung stands from his desk, still staring. He watches you, waiting – until you arch a brow and glance down at the handle. “Oh, fuck,” he groans – you read this clearly on his lips – as he presses the buzzer.

The moment the door is unlocked, you step in. “Hi.”

Taehyung stares back at you, wide-eyed. “Hey.” He looks around. “What are you doing here?”

Remaining silent, you glance around the space of his office. It’s strange, since this is the first time you’ve ever been here. Normally, you just meet Taehyung in the lobby but his office is clean, organized in a way that’s reminiscent of himself. Everything is in straight lines, no nonsense – but here and there, there are glimpses. You see the same wedding photo that exists in your cubicle, framed square on his desk.

It’s facing outwards, so that whoever sits in the meeting chair can see and, taking a step closer, you let your fingers trail over the frame.

“Conversational piece,” Taehyung admits, clearing his throat. “For when people visit.”

“Ah,” you nod, turning away.

The skyline before you is enormous, stretching from one end of the room to the other. Taehyung’s desk sits at one end, a conference room at the other. Table, chairs, a projector and monitors set up.

You’re about to walk over – when you spot the wall behind his desk.

“What?” Taehyung turns – then flushes, seeing where you look. “Ah, that’s – nothing,” he hastens, lifting a hand before dropping it. “It’s just… silly.”

“It’s us,” you whisper, stepping past.

It is you, but not a photo you remember. You can’t be older than sixteen. You’re grinning, laughing with Taehyung’s arm stretched around you. He still has his baby fat, something which will disappear as he grows. You still have your braces, although you must be close to getting rid of them, since your teeth are near straight and even.

It’s fall, the leaves are orange behind you and Taehyung doesn’t look at the camera, but instead stares at you. He’s looking at you with that look in his eyes, the look you recognize because it’s the same one he wears in the photo you have in your office.

Slowly, you turn to face him. “Why do you have this?” you ask.

“I...” Taehyung hesitates, rubbing the back of his neck. “I like the picture.”

You stare at him for a moment. Then you say, “Kim Taehyung. Did you transfer Tim to a different department?”

Taehyung’s eyes widen. “Wh – what? Who told you that?”

“Taehyung,” you laugh, although there’s no humor in it. “What in the hell were you thinking? That’s my workplace! I’m a professional, you can’t just run around acting like a – god, I don’t even know what you acted like. Some jealous, idiotic moron.”

“I know,” Taehyung exhales, oddly nevous. “I shouldn’t have done it. You just looked so uncomfortable,” he blurts, pushing a hand through his hair – a nervous habit. “I’ve never seen you look that way and I wanted to protect you, wanted you happy and I – may not have handled it very well,” he admits, hands falling to his sides.

“Handled it well?” you scoff, expression hard. “This is so embarrassing!”

Immediately, you wish you could take that back because Taehyung stares at you, looking tortured and pained – and you can’t explain why, but you take a step closer.

“Taehyung.”

You wait until he looks at you.

He swallows. “Yes?”

“Why?” you ask, uncertain what you’re searching for. “Why did you switch Tim from my team?”

The longer Taehyung stares, the more his expression darkens. “I didn’t want him making you uncomfortable. Why did you leave?” he asks, challenging you with his own question.

You blink at him, thrown. “Leave… when?”

Taehyung takes a step closer. “After,” his blurts, voice catching. “Why didn’t you stay with me, that night?”

“Stay... with you?” you repeat, startled when his hand finds yours.

Taehyung looks down at your fingers in his. Your hands just touch, nothing more – but somehow, it’s the most romantic gesture he’s ever done.

“I wanted you there,” he admits, helpless. “I wanted you to stay with me, to fall asleep with me, to hold you in my bed. I didn’t know how to ask.” Taehyung stammers a bit, falling over the words. “I… know, you’ve never considered me in that way.”

“What?” Your mouth drops and you’re aware this must be highly unattractive, but you can’t find it within yourself to care. “I’ve never looked at you? What the hell do you mean by that, Kim Taehyung?”

He looks taken aback by your tone. “In the cafeteria,” he responds simply. “I asked Kelsey to see if you liked me – I was standing behind you and I overhead everything when you said that you didn’t.”

Sharp horror jabs at your thoughts. The realization is painful; the fact that he heard, the fact that Taehyung has lived with this knowledge as long as you have. He thought you didn’t like him, thought you didn’t care. Your eyes drift shut, the memories reshuffling in the chaos. Taehyung thought you didn’t like him. He heard you say all those awful things when you wanted Kelsey off your back – and he thought you meant them.

You’re barely aware when you step forward. Your hands find his chest, sliding up his body and into his hair.

“No, no, no,” you say, opening your eyes. “I just said those things to shut Kelsey up. She said you couldn’t like me, that you’d never want me – she was teasing me, saying I liked you. I... just snapped,” you admit, voice soft. “I said those things to get her to stop talking. But you,” you say, lower lip trembling. “You thought I didn’t like you?”

Taehyung nods as your hands wind into his hair. “I...” He sounds dazed by this realization. “Fuck.”

“So. That’s why you said what you did? With those boys, in the hallway.”

The room is quiet and you don’t have to look to know that he’s nodding. Just the sounds of breath and memory lie between you, fading to nothing when Taehyung grasps your hands with his.

You look up.

“Yeah,” he admits. “I was angry, upset. I thought you didn’t care about me, so when they teased me, I pushed them away. I’m so sorry, darling,” he whispers, the endearment taking on whole different tone. “I didn’t mean for – I didn’t know you were there. When you kept ignoring me and refused to talk, I figured...” He swallows. “I figured I should take the hint.”

“All this time,” you manage, your laughter turning to hiccups. “All this time, I’ve liked you and you’ve liked me.”

Taehyung nods, the corner of his mouth lifting. “We’ve been pretty fucking stupid, haven’t we?”

“The stupidest.”

“No more,” he murmurs, bending his head. Taehyung’s lips stop just over yours. “The day my father asked me to marry you, I swear I stopped breathing. To have everything I ever wanted, everything I ever dreamed of, but,” he stops, mouth twisting. “To have you not want me. I didn’t know what to do, how to make you fall in love with me when I felt so much.”

“You… love me?” you ask, hands clutching his like a lifeline.

Taehyung’s gaze lightens. “Of course, I love you. I’ve loved you since we were twelve, and you kept kicking my ass at call of duty.”

Laughing gently, you touch his cheek. “I thought you hated me for that.”

“That, too.”

You shake your head, memorizing the way he looks, the way he feels, the very touch of him. No longer are you just his, you realize; this time he’s yours. You belong to one another, have belonged long before the words appeared on paper. When Taehyung kisses you now, the gesture is soft and sweet. You feel it in your bones and inhale him with sudden certainty.

“But you were such an ass to me,” you grumble, grinning when Taehyung starts to laugh.

“Of course.” He pulls back to bop you on the nose. “You wouldn’t look at me, otherwise.”

“You could have, I don’t know, said you liked me.”

“So much more than like, though.”

“Mhm, well just to be –"

“Shut up,” Taehyung groans, before kissing you again.

[Bound Series Master List]

drabble from my 30K followers game with Taehyung + Y/N in a super fluffy fight

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