#oh man its kinda terrifying sharing this but also i miss creating things for the things i love and its so exciting that i'm feeling so

[hallowbees]

good evening rottmnt community. so i haven't written fanfic in almost a decade, but whilst taking a break from working on a rottmnt fanfic, i have written... another rottmnt fanfic. i wanted to play around with different povs and tenses than i usually use, and decided to use casey jr and the future timeline to try it out - it was super fun to write, so i thought why not share it!!

you're a lifesaver, casey jones

fives times casey jones junior saves the resistance, and the one time it doesn’t feel like a victory

five months old

You’re only five months old when you save the resistance for the first time. You’re so young.

The shattered remains of a home cradle you, muscle memory from the years of keeping a family long gone safe and warm, and even if you can feel the wind as it whistles through the cracks in the bricks and the sky looms red, enemy drones and rubble floating above you like a cot mobile, you don’t cry. Your little life has already taught you the harshest lesson of the apocalypse, and it’s not that crying won’t get you anywhere; crying will get you somewhere alright, six feet deep in a grave if the wrong ones hear you. Of course you don’t actually know that, not in that way at least, but you do know crying only ever wears you out. Tough lesson to learn, ain't it kid, but you learnt it well. You might just make it yet. 

There’s no telling how long you’ve been here- could have been five minutes, could have been forever, it's all the same to you. It’s unlikely that there are any coherent thoughts rattling around in that little brain of yours yet, but if so, they might sound something like this; I miss you, I miss you, where did you go? I’m hungry, it hurts, I miss you. Where did everyone go? I miss you. The same thoughts plague most brains these days, everyone’s got a ‘you’ to miss. We’ll all be ‘you’ someday, if we’re lucky. God, this is all quite morbid isn’t it, little one? It’s okay, though. Remember, this is a story about how you save them. It’s a happy story, you’ll get your happily ever after, even if they don’t all live.

She looks a lot like you, strangely. It’s something about the eyes, dark and strong, and the general aura of defiance. Maybe that’s why she finds you first, she feels a kinship in your ‘warrior spirit’, as she calls it, ‘a true fighter’, she calls you. ‘They are a baby, babies cannot fight. Primarily because they are still in the very early stages of fine motor skills development and cannot wield weapons yet, amongst other reasons.’ another voice says, but he doesn’t know just how hard you already have fought, will fight still. You’re there, and that is everything these days. She comes to your defence, proclaiming you ‘the strongest fighter of the resistance’, and ‘silence, purple one!’. You can’t tell that the second shout isn’t aimed at you, but what you can tell is that it's warm in her arms and now you only see her and not the broken sky above you. It’s not ‘you’, and you’re still not sure where everyone went, but this still feels comfortable. This feels like home, you think.

That’s the moment you break, and the tears start. You cry, and you cry, and you are surrounded by her. Her voice is low now, a tone rusty in use but so sure of itself as she tells you that you’re okay, you’re safe, she’s got you. ‘Poor thing, they must be so scared.’ comes a new voice, and there's a blur of orange (once you figure out what orange is, it’ll become your favourite colour, one of four favourites) over her shoulder. ‘Ain’t we all.’ comes a low rumble from behind. ‘They won’t be anymore. We’ve got them now.’ she says, and that’s how you meet your strange little family. Some of it, that is - there are more, an aunt and a grandfather or two, so many people ready to love you. 

She doesn’t just give you a name, she gives you hers. You’re Casey Jones Junior, a reminder that something always comes after. You don’t know yet how badly Casey Jones Senior had needed that reminder - she’s spent her whole life in pursuit of what’s next, in hopes that its greater than what’s now (a promotion, a resurrection, a fabled leader) and despair that it never is (better luck next time recruit, they could do it all without her, she breaks the chains that spell his downfall herself). When she finds the apocalypse next, she starts to think that maybe nothing next would be quite alright, but then there’s you and for the first time she truly feels like she’s on the right track. 

She carries you home, her family around her and in her arms, and Casey Jones Senior resolves to keep fighting another day. 

four years old

In your defence, such a sharp weapon should have never been left in your curious reach. In his, there's so much to keep on top of when you’re spearheading a resistance that if a sai or two get misplaced in the process, can anyone really blame him? Your hand is being patched up as he is berated once again, because ‘you know that weapons stay on you at all times, Raph’, and ‘why are they even sharp? Aren’t sai meant to be blunt?’. He groans out something about being a stupid teenager once upon a time, wondering what would happen if he sharpened his weapon the same way his brother did his swords, much out of the same curiosity that got you into this very predicament. He sounds like he might cry, but you can’t work out why. It’s your palm that's bleeding, and you didn’t even make a peep. That might have been the problem, though - no one noticed until your blood was smeared across the floor and that’s a sight no one can stomach. You were scooped up quickly, and he looks haunted. ‘He’ could have been anyone in the room.

“Raph’s sorry, lil’ guy.”. He’s gentle, so gentle, as he kneels before you and takes your bandaged hand. “I promise I won’t leave ‘em out again like that.”. There’s no promise that you won’t get hurt again, because no one likes to break a promise, but the way he smiles at you, still so gentle, makes all the pain go away.

“Can I hold ‘em again when I’m bigger please?” you ask, and of course you can’t see it but there’s a little sparkle in your eyes as you look up at him, glimmering like the stars that are still above you even if you can’t see them anymore, in the sky that no longer belongs to Earth. Let's look on the bright side though; it could still be ours again someday.

“Um… if your Mom says you can, then sure thing, buddy. But only when you’re older.”. Your mom will say yes, she always says yes because there is nothing that a Jones cannot do, so you cheer and throw your tiny little arms around his far bigger neck. You can’t hold all of him, so you just squeeze extra tight so he still feels the love all over. A hand comes to pat you on the back, and you certainly feel loved in his hold. 

“Why’d you want to hold ‘em so bad anyways, bud?” he asks, and you grin. It’s big and toothy, with a little gap right at the front where you lost your first tooth, and thank god that you lost it in the natural way, and not the way most people lose teeth these days.

“I wanna be just like Uncle Raphie!”. He melts, and the tears are back. Rather than wipe them away though, he just squeezes you closer. 

It’s one of the last memories you’ll get of Raphael, so please hold onto it. Hold onto it just as tight as you held onto his neck that day, held him long enough for the blood to seep through your bandages and make its mark on his skin. 

…

Well, anyways - there’s a conversation later that night that you’re not privy to. You’re probably fast asleep by your mother’s side when the clock strikes this antisocial hour. 

“He’s so little. Too little. Casey shouldn’t be even thinking about holding weapons yet.”.

Yet, yet, yet, it’s always yet. Weaponry is waiting for you in the future, and no one can lie, there are keen eyes on you as you play around the resistance base, to spot any signs of affinity for particular weapon types and fighting styles (you’re fast, get up close and personal, and there will be a brute force behind your hits if you really want there to be - someone offhandedly mentions hockey and the blueprints are already being drawn up). 

“Maybe it would be better to start him young. It is inevitable, after all.”. That’s probably the toughest pill for them to swallow, that when you grow up (if, if you grow up - that would be even harder to choke down if they would let themselves even consider it) you’ll be thrown to the front lines. 

But hey - we’re looking on the bright side, remember?

“C’mon guys, enough with the doom and gloom! Think of it this way - at least there will be someone to keep on fighting after us. And he’s going to be far more prepared than we ever could have been. Seriously, he’s like, the apocalypse nepo baby.”. You’d be shocked by how funny the apocalypse could be sometimes. It has to be, because if you don’t laugh you’ll cry, and you already know where crying gets you. It’s not the best joke, but it gets a snort from someone. “He’s got no choice but to succeed. I’m calling it now, Casey’s gonna be the one to end this someday. ”

“S’not much of a bright side. He’ll still have to fight.”. 

“Chin up, big guy. Look at what we’ve achieved already. The kind of things Casey’s going to do with all of us behind him? It’s looking pretty bright to me.”. It goes unsaid that most of them probably won’t be there to see it, but it’s enough for now. The thought of you seeing the other side of this war, even if you have to fight for it tooth and nail, it’s enough to let Raph truly think about what the end of the apocalypse could look like for the very first time since Hell arrived on earth. He thinks of the stars, how they’re still shining brightly and how we will see them again. He can even see a small smattering of them in the bleeding sky when he lays dying a few days later, and his final thought is that maybe we’re already starting to turn the tides. 

seven years old

Most people will probably tell you that celebrating a birthday is a waste of time, resources, and energy. The most cynical of the bunch would probably tell you that we don’t actually know when your birthday is, so why are you so confident that it’s today? But, and please don’t repeat this language, fuck them -  you’re seven years old, and isn’t that just incredible? You feel like the luckiest seven year old in the entire resistance (you’re only one of three in this branch, and Laura’s leg got broken yesterday, so your competition isn’t exactly tough) when your culinary wizard of an uncle manages to scrape together some sort of cake. The adults around you grimace a little when they bite into it (culinary wizard he may be, but there’s only so much magic can do), but you think it’s the best thing you’ve ever tasted. It’s dry, and sticks to the roof of your mouth, and you’d hesitate to call it chocolate, but you go in for a second helping, and no one stops you because it’s your birthday! There’s more than enough to go around; your family has gotten a little bit smaller, after all. They’re never truly gone though, because you can always see his red bandana, and you’ll always share your name with her. You don’t really remember anything more than a grey blur, but your grandfather’s famous battle cry continues to echo across the frontlines. You make sure to enjoy your second helping even more than the first, just for them. 

There is one slice of cake left, and it has no business sitting on the plate looking all lonely like that. You’re not sure exactly why he didn’t show up this time, but you’re not going to let your special day pass by without seeing him. It may be your day, but the things that make you happy are so much sweeter when you share them; you think it might be because you love your family’s smiles more than anything else in the whole entire world. Pushing yourself up from the comfortable pile of mostly everyone you love on the floor (if some missions had been shifted around to make sure everyone could be here for you today, then no one was going to complain), you pick up the plate and go to find the missing piece of your family’s jigsaw puzzle.

“Where are you taking that, Case? Trying to sneak a third helping?”. Voices are light, and maybe it’s the most at ease you’ve ever seen your family. Today really is special.

“Nope, it’s Uncle Donnie’s and he’s gotta eat it today because tomorrow it’s just cake and that's much less exciting than birthday cake.”. You’re on a mission, just like the ones your uncles and aunt go on, ones you can’t wait to join them on someday, because you don’t want to be anything other than just like them when you finally grow up. Your aunt has even begun teaching you how to fight, and she always tells you what a natural you are (she feels so guilty about it, because it would be so much easier if you weren’t going to be such a powerhouse on the battlefield; there would maybe be cause to clutch you close to her chest and never let you go otherwise).

You might hear what’s said as you leave. “Casey, buddy, maybe you shouldn’t…”. You don’t let it deter you, even if you do.

“Nah, I say let him try. Maybe he’ll finally get through to that brilliantly dumb brain of his.”.

You guard the cake with your life as you run to the lab, because you can’t possibly wait a second longer to see him. This is the one thing that could make your day go from amazing to perfect. Call it your birthday wish, even if you didn’t have a candle to blow out.

You’re not actually sure when you last saw your uncle beyond a fleeting flash of purple at breakfast time, and that one night last week you had a standoff in the corridor at 3am, because you had a nightmare and wanted your Uncle Mikey, and he needed more coffee (if it was just a bit lighter, you’d have seen his damp eyes, and maybe would have figured out that he needed to seek out his brothers just as much as you). You know when you’re going to see him next, though - in about 30 seconds, because you’re standing in front of his door.

Knock, knock, knock. There isn’t a pattern, you just bang on the door with one hand, careful to balance the plate on your other. Bang, bang, bang. You’re greeted with the rhythmic bang of a hammer in response - or at least you think at first, it doesn’t take much waiting to realise that he probably hasn’t heard you. 

Knock, knock, knock. “Uncle Donnie! I have something for you!” you shout, right at the top of your lungs. Bang, bang - “Just leave it outside the door, I’ll get it later.” - bang.

Well, in that case - you sit down, cross legged and leaning against the door. Because sure, you’re bringing him the cake, but you’re really here because you miss him, and just want a little bit of his time. You think that sounds like a fair exchange; he gets a slice of your best birthday cake ever, and you get five minutes with your beloved uncle. Neither of those come around that often, so you should both make the most of it.

He must have underestimated your attention span, because he has the audacity to look shocked that you’re still there when he opens the door and you fall backwards into the lab with a shout of surprise. It’s only been 20 minutes; you’d wait so much longer than that for him. Miraculously, even in your speedy venture to the floor, the cake is still sitting neatly on its plate, and you hold it up with a wide grin. “I got you cake!”.

A million miles an hour is probably a gross underestimation of how fast your uncle’s brain goes at any given moment, for better or worse. The look on his face suggests that for a moment, his thoughts are speeding even by his standards, and then they promptly smash into a brick wall. You can tell by the way his eyes get a little bit too wide, and his mouth falls open a little - it’s an expression you only see in the rare moments he feels like he’s failed, although all you can see is a success - because there he is! You’re still grinning up at him from the floor, even if your arms are starting to shake from holding the plate up. He shakes away the expression, and quickly takes the plate from you. Only to swiftly discard it on a nearby workbench though, in favour of kneeling down and leaning over to look at your blinding grin. 

“Casey… is it today?” he asks, still a little too wide eyed. You giggle a little, because what else would it be, tomorrow? He does genuinely look lost though, so you nod. It’s rare that you know something that he doesn’t, but even if it might feel cool to outsmart the smartest person you know, you fill him in. “Yeah, it’s today! And it’s also my birthday.”. He’s quiet for a moment, teeth worrying his lips as his eyes flick away from your face. “And I’m seven.”.

“Not until 6:47pm.” he says, almost automatically. Once he realises what he’s said, his panicked eyes flick to the screen on his wrist, and you think he’s checking the time.

“You haven’t missed it! I made sure to keep looking at the hands on the clock so I could come and see you before you miss it.”. It’s the time that the scouting-turned-rescue mission seven years ago got back to the base, and an official mission report was made. ‘Baby boy, approximately 5 months old, found in rubble. No others found in immediate vicinity.’, submitted at 6:47pm. It’s never bothered you that it’s not the exact day or moment you were born, it’s the exact day and time your family became just that, and that's what really matters to you. None of your uncles know the exact time and day they were born either (the debate of who’s older still rages on till this day, not even the end of the world can put that argument to rest), so it means you’re just like them. You still can’t imagine wanting to be anything else. 

“Okay.”. He stands up, and offers you a hand. You take it, giggling as he pulls you up a little bit too far and your legs dangle. You kick them for a second, before he notices and puts you back firmly on solid ground. “I have two forks.”. 

You sit in the bean bags he has stashed in the corner of the lab, and the two of you share the last slice of birthday cake. He struggles more than the others to hide his distaste for it, but you think it tastes the best it has yet. The lab door has been left open, and you know that it’s not by mistake, because it could have been shut with a quick tap of a screen, but it stays wide open as the rest of your family files in. You’re all slotted together perfectly when the clock strikes 6:47pm, and you hear your Uncle Donnie sing the loudest as your family wishes you a happy birthday. You think it’s because you’re sitting closest to him, but everyone else can see the way his chest expands as he takes deep breaths, putting his all into his well wishes.

It was easy for him to forget that life isn’t over yet, even if what he’s been burdened with is creating and creating until he has something that will prolong it just that little bit longer. Amidst the cheers of ‘hip hip hooray’, he remembers that moments like this are exactly what he’s toiling away in the lab for. They haven’t gone anywhere yet though, and he doesn’t want to let even a single second of it pass him by again. Donnie actually smiles for once, because you are seven years old now and that really is something incredible. You see him everyday at breakfast after that, with actual food rather than just a mug, and he always has a fork for you. 

eleven years old

You’re just about in the double digits the first time you actually realise that you’ve saved the resistance. It happens so quickly - you’re still not old enough to be out on the field, but it’s all hands on deck when the krang brings the fight to your front door. Maybe don’t say this to anyone else, but you sort of think that it makes your age a moot point - if you can fight like hell when the hallways are caving in and there's pink, pink, pink everywhere, then surely you can join simple scouting missions? No one quite understands why you’re so eager to be out there on the field, and maybe you don’t fully understand either (you definitely don't understand just how dire it is out there, they’ve done a good job of keeping that from you so far), but you know that it’s what you want. It’s what all of your heroes do, after all. You know for a fact that your uncles wanted to be just like their own heroes when they grew up, and now that you’re finally getting taller and your arms are starting to gain a little muscle, why can’t you follow in their footsteps? The only difference is that their heroes were on the TV screen. You’re lucky enough to see yours in the flesh every single day. Two of them, at least. Purple now flutters alongside the fraying red. 

At first, it’s no different from all of the other hounds. It’s gross and dripping, what you think must be teeth gnashing and shockingly red. You’re not stupid, you know that it can’t be krang blood, you don’t think they even have it, but nothing can deter you from swinging your hockey stick right into its side (and you know you could do so much more than just crack it’s bones into tiny little pieces if someone finally listened to you and removed the child lock that Donnie was forced to add), sending it flying sideways. A little blood never bothered you, and it’s a good job, because you’re covered in it. Some of it might be your own, but there’s so much adrenaline pumping through your veins right now that pain doesn’t even stand a chance at stopping you. You feel so alive as you wipe some of that blood from your face (definitely not your own, you’d know if you had a head wound), but your heart stops as you see what was laid beneath the hound. 

It’s your aunt, or what might be left of her - you can’t tell if her chest is still rising and falling or not. She’s teetering on the edge of just being another body in the makeshift morgue, which you know is nearing full already. Your body wants to freeze, your tears want to fall, your voice wants to scream, but listen, here’s what you do instead: drop to your knees, bring your ear right up to her mouth to here those wheezing, determined breaths, then immediately pull the hoodie over your head to first clear enough blood to find the wound, and second put pressure on it as you scream out for help. You’ve got this. You’re doing so well, kid. Just remember to take a few breaths of your own in the middle of all of this chaos. 

Help doesn’t come, but another hound does. You don’t let it get close, as you put those little muscles to use and scoop her up. This one won’t get to her. It snarls at you, and you snarl back, flashing your matching bloody teeth. You turn and run before it can even think about pouncing, and even though she’s heavy, you’re still fast as you jump over rubble and dodge bodies you don’t have time to think about trying to save.

The medbay is still standing, proving that the decision to make it the most out of the way and difficult to reach location in the base was at least somewhat strategic. The krang hasn’t reached it, and based on the mutters of ‘code green’ and ‘it’s over’, they won’t this time. It’s still yet, yet, yet, as you know, but it’s not now so you shove your aunt onto a bed and don’t even wait for an adult to start grabbing bandages and needles. They do still take over eventually, because it doesn’t matter that you just saved Commander O’Neil’s life - you are still just a child. Just barely in the double digits. Hopefully one day you’ll realise this was never an insult, instead it was maybe the greatest display of love they could give you. No one escapes the apocalypse, but they still tried to give you routes out of it. The corridors are all collapsed now though, and you grip your hockey stick tight in your blood-slicked grasp as you watch your aunt be pulled back together into one piece. 

April’s probably the one person in the resistance whose resolve has never shaken, but that’s not to say it can’t still be strengthened. When she wakes to see your bloodstained hoodie discarded by the cot she’s found herself on, she’ll of course panic for a second. Thankfully, someone will quickly fill her in, tell her that the blood is her own, and the unbelievable story of the little child who dragged her from the jaws of the hounds. She’ll believe it though, because for starters, you're a Jones, and a Jones can do anything, of course. You’re also a Hamato, and if there’s one thing Hamato can’t do, it’s leave family behind. This spells the start of your official tenure as a resistance fighter, because your age is something you’ll outgrow, but your fighting spirit is something you will not.

It might also have something to do with the fact that much of the resistance lay dead all around you, their blood still clinging to your skin, but what do we always say? Look on the bright side. Stars are still shining, buddy. Time to join your heroes in taking them back.

fourteen years old

You don’t even have to do anything this time. You’re off somewhere with your aunt, maybe training, maybe laughing, ideally both. 

The way you save the resistance this time looks something like this: sparks of molten magic, and a pull he’s never felt before. He can’t deny it, it does feel like hope, but hurts like hell as it starts to crackle up his arms. He’s swiftly stopped, not by his own will, but he’s grateful when the fire splitting him apart fizzles out. It’s very quiet in the aftermath, because they know what this means. It means it’s possible. It means it's going to cost everything. 

They decide that it would be worth it though, if it gave you a chance. There’s no one else they believe in more than you. It’s been said for years, as far back as the days where the only time you shed blood was when you mishandled sai that now just sit and collect dust; you’re gonna be the one to end this someday.

That day should be far off in the future though, when they’ve had time to give you the mission brief, hand over the supplies, and give you a tight hug, not goodbye but good luck. There isn’t really a point dwelling on it now. Mikey just smiles as he tugs the bandages tighter around his arms, and relishes in the fact that they finally have a plan B that might just work out this time. It helps to reignite the optimistic fire he was reluctant to tell anyone was starting to burn out. 

+1. sixteen years old

You’re only sixteen years old when you save the resistance for the last time. You’re so young. I think it might really be the end this time, kiddo. 

You don’t even flinch when I bleed on you, you just tell me that you’ve got me, just as I had you all those time you scraped your knee or bruised your elbow. Not to be arrogant, but you said it yourself - you learned from the best. Sorry. I know it’s not about me, but there’s very little left these days to focus on. Let’s keep the attention on you though, because you’re about to finally save the resistance once and for all. 

All that needs to be said is ‘hope’, and Mikey knows it’s time for plan B. There’s no time for anything we’d planned, no explanation, no hugs goodbye or good luck, but the belief in you never wavers. Not for a second. You’re Casey Jones-Hamato Junior, remember? There’s nothing you can’t do, except leave your family behind. I won’t say that out loud, because you’ll argue that you are in fact leaving me and Mikey behind. Technically, I’d argue you’re leaving us ahead, because soon we’ll be the future. Again, I won’t say that, because if my last words are going to be a joke, I at least want it to be a good one. What you’re doing, in actual fact, is giving us a second chance. I don’t doubt for a second that you’ll find us back there. Our sky may now be lost, but they’ll take you to the highest rooftop and show you every single shimmering constellation and you’ll finally know an Earth that firmly belongs to us. Oh buddy, you’re going to love it.

The last I see of you, you’re crying. It’s one of the first things I saw you do, and now it’s the last. That first time all those sixteen years ago, I think you only started crying because you knew it was finally safe to call attention to yourself as Casey held you in surprisingly gentle but strong arms. Now, I can’t kid myself, I know it’s because you’re scared, and I’m sorry. But hey, you know how I like to look on the bright side - at least the last you see of me, I’m smiling. 

I hope that’s the last you see, at least, I know it won’t be long as a hound throws itself at me. There’s only one thing on my mind now, and it’s that you really are gonna do it. You’re gonna be the one to end this today. 

I’m real proud of-

#oh man its kinda terrifying sharing this but also i miss creating things for the things i love and its so exciting that i'm feeling so #inspired rn!!!! #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #casey jones jr #rise leo #rottmnt fanfiction #ellie makes post #i've posted on ao3 too which again terrifying but i'm determined to share this big one i'm working on too #this is me working up to sharing that one ig

[mybiasisexo]

Reverent

Genre: Angst | Fallen Angel!au

Pairing: Suho x Reader

Length: 1.8k

Warning: Religion (?) | Blasphamy (?)

Summary: Suho’s dull life takes quite the turn when he stumbles across a beautiful demon

Author’s Note: @byunfirstlady here is the roughest of rough drafts of the angel!suho fic I promised like 2 years ago smh. I really need to give it the attention it deserves bc it could really, truly, be something great. Until then, here is what I have for now. Mind you it is not edited and I plan on changing a lot of things about it, but I really like the narration, idk, its kinda beautiful???  Title is also a WIP

MASTERLIST

credit

What do you miss?

That was the question Suho thought constantly. It repeatedly flowed through his brain. Oh, so many answers to the question! But, undeniably, being in good grace was the most regretful.

He made his choices, fair enough. Some would say he shouldn’t had been able to do that much, he knew all too well, free will wasn’t of his domain. Yet, look where it got him.

Trapped. Stranded on an insignificant sphere that twirled around mockingly as a cruel reminder of all that he had lost.

Time to him meant absolutely nothing. It was yet another thing out of his domain, but some years such as this, he dreaded the slowness of it. Dreaded the reminder that he was stuck in this vacuum they called Earth, waiting for a day that will never come.

For him to finally be forgiven.

His eyes squinted as he took in the corn yellow sun. It was almost blindingly white, as if life itself had sucked away all of the vibrant hue. This part of the world was like that: dreary. Filled with washed out blues and browns, dusty and dry. It wasn’t a place he preferred, he found himself more at home in large metropolises, surrounded by people too busy to recognize such a raw entity, although they could still tell when around his presence that something was…off.

It was a blessing and a curse, Suho supposed, his soul. If he even had one. If he could even call it that. That was the one thing that reminded him of who he truly was. After being stripped of everything, that was all He left him with. Naked, shaking in humility, bleeding for the first time, and radiant.

He could leave the holy place, but it would always reside within him.

Lately, he felt lonely.

That’s what had brought him here—the loneliness. Being imprisoned upon the Earth for as long as he had, you grew to become lonesome. There were many ways to try to compete with it, but as long as he was an outcast, he would forever be lost in his isolation.

His closest friend throughout it all was the sun. The bright mass of energy that warmed his hard skin always reminded him of the love he once had—that he still had. The sun kept his faith alive. And as it rose in the morning, it brought with it the start of a new beginning.

He could never turn back time.

That was probably why he disdained the word so much.

His attention was pulled away from the hovering orb, brought to the young man of which he came for. The boy with the brazen skin.

He was beautiful, this could not be denied. As he rushed out of his house, keys clanking in his awkwardly large hand. He was late again. Suho tisked, but his eyes widened with what followed after the boy.

An unfamiliar woman trailed behind him, not nearly in as much a hurry as the one before her. Her face was otherworldly beautiful, built to invite, built to seduce.

The boy was in the car in no time, speeding away in a hurry, leaving dust in his wake.

The woman stopped, not taking after him. Instead, she lifted her head and locked eyes solidly with Suho.

He gasped as she smiled angelically and then the dust lifted, barricading her from view.

Once it settled again, she was gone.

~*~

Suho could barely recall the last time he saw another one of the Fallen. About fifty years, give or take. A demon? It had been a bit longer. There were fewer of them, although some of the fallen seek refuge under the dark wings of the under lord. It was why they were created after all, to follow, to serve. If not to Him than to his enemy. The two of them were more similar than they thought, although Suho would never dream of telling either one—not like he would ever get the chance to. Lucifer terrified him and God… well, they weren’t exactly on speaking terms.

Even though it had been a while, he recognized a demon when he saw one. What did she want with the boy? Puzzled, Suho pondered what drew the creature to him in the first place.

Speaking of places, this wasn’t Suho’s at all. He never considered himself a vigilante, as many other Fallen do. Their sense of purpose and protection overwhelming them to do right. That was mostly those who were guardians in the past. Suho was not in that field. No. This foreign sense of concern drew from something else entirely. He bit his lip, curling the warm mug in his hands closer to himself as he fought off the strange feeling fogging his mind.

The demon, right.

Demons were sent to Earth from the Under Lord to do his biddings. Simply, to coerce as many humans as they could. Drag them back to hell so that He could mourn the loss of yet another of his fragile creatures. Suho understood enough to know Lucifer took great pride in hurting Him however he could. Another lost soul was a victory to him.

She must have saw something within that boy to make her decide to latch. Suho had been watching him for a while now, and this was the first he had seen of the dark entity. Maybe she felt it…. No, there was no way. Suho was being careful, meticulously so. There was no room for error as far as his involvement and he meant to keep it that way.

He was that boy’s protector, now more than ever, he had a duty to him.

It felt good, having a purpose again. He had lost it centuries ago—a real duty, a call to be good.

Maybe after all of this was done, he would again be in His good grace. But it was still a wistful wish, one he refused to humor until it happened.

“Would you like another one, Sir?”

Suho lifted his head to the waitress and despite being a regular at this point, she still stuttered at his beauty.

He smiled, white teeth on display and her breath caught in her throat. “Please.”

~*~

A week had gone by without any sight of the demon. Suho tried to mask his disappointment with relief. It wasn’t as though he wanted anything to come to the boy, but it had been so long since he had been in contact with one of his own, demon or not. She had to have some sort of connection to their shared past.

He knew how demons worked.

Once they found a person to leech off of, they attached until their job was done, or the person fought them off. Suho watched an exorcism once. It was one of the hardest things he ever had to witness. That was a long time ago, using different methods, different practices. All the same, it was a memory that, to this day, gave him chills.

The boy was a religious man, oddly enough. Suho didn’t understand how, but every Sunday, he found himself at the local church, sitting in the back, listening to the spoken word.

He used to pray, but hadn’t in years. He wondered if it were his place too, if God ever listened to him or others like him. Or, like everything else, if it were only for them.

He was running late this Sunday. It was well into mass when he rushed towards the small, yet still elegant tan bricked church.

His quick steps came to a stop when he saw someone leaning against the wall, cigarette in hand. She wore torn leather pants that hung dangerously low on her wide hips, an equally as torn black wife beater that appeared more of a well-used rag than anything else as it barely covered the swell of her breasts, though her toned stomach was exposed. Her belly botton was pierced and a faded tattoo splayed over her abdomen. He couldn’t make out the word from this distance and the ink blended into her skin. A small black denim vest sat on her shoulders, leaving her arms exposed, tattoos dotted the limbs as well. Her jet black straight hair hung loosly. It was time for her to wash it. Her face, again, was angelic, despite her best efforts to be anything but. Big stunning round eyes surrounded by long eyelashes that brushed her chiseled cheeks whenever she blinked. Nose a button on the center of her face, lips full and pink, cheeks rosy, and skin flawless, not a blemish in sight.

He had her full attention as well. She took him in with a pleased smile, holding the cigarette up. “You think this will kill me?”

Her voice was just as attractive as her face, and the way she tilted her head left Suho breathless. He couldn’t seem to find his voice, struck dumb by her large presence. It had been a moment since he saw one of his kind, but he never felt a presence as strong as hers.

She noticed.

Never breaking eye contact, she dropped the small stick, putting it out with the heel of her boot. Than she motioned her thumb towards the building she currently leaned against where he could faintly make out singing.

“They won’t let me in. I thought this place welcomed all.”

“Why are you here?” He worked up the courage to ask. He knew why, but wanted her to say it.

She shrugged. “Thought our old man would be happy to see me.” She shoved her hands into the pocket of her jeans. “Guess not.”

“Do… Do I know you?” Suho pressed. There were hundreds of angels, all with a specific role/job. It was impossible to know them all, especially if this were someone who fell after him, but her energy was strong—too strong to be newer than him.

She shrugged again. “Maybe. When did you fall?”

“When did you?”

“Oh, so you’re the one in charge here I see.” She laughed, pushing herself off the building to come closer. “What’s your name, tough guy?”

Her breath smelled sweet. He hadn’t been this close to a demon before, refusing to have anything to do with them. They were everything He hated, everything He feared. He wanted nothing against those who had turned their backs completely from Him.

All the same, he felt complied to answer. “This land refers to me as Suho.”

“Suho,” she repeated, letting the word swirl around her wet tongue. “Korean, correct? Makes sense, that’s where we are.”

“It means—”

“Guardian.” She interrupted. “Fitting. You must’ve been one in your past life.”

His jaw clenched and she noticed.

“I’m sorry,” she said, not sounding apologetic in the slightest.

#Suho scenarios #exo scenarios #suho #suho scenario #exo scenario #suho drabbles #suho drabble #exo drabbles #exo drabble #suho oneshots #suho oneshot #exo oneshot #exo oneshots

[hakurines]

"Its not gay if he's also you"

Owo (from spookyscaryslasers)

The King dragged his past self through the sewers, taking a tight hold on his arm and constantly looking behind them.

  “Did we lose them?” The pre entity self said, looking worriedly over his shoulder. His encounter with those two women left him… shaken, to say at the least. Thankfully another one of his selves was there to save him, who now currently was guiding him through the dark stinky sewers not so nicely.

  “Come on now! We are almost there!” The king insisted, never ceasing his iron grip on the poor man’s arm. “W-wait up! you’re hurting meeee” The pre entity Herman said, trying to catch up to the other him, one that was touched by the entity. He couldn’t help but still feel afraid, yes, he saved him but… he looked like a monster, the way all that gold covered his face didn’t make him look fancy or elegant, it made him terrifying, was he really going to become like him? Abruptly, the king stopped, making the other bump his head and nose against his back. Rubbing his nose, and slight tears on his eyes, he simply followed the other up a ladder, possibly leading to the surface. The King helped him to his feet, only to realise they were sill at some endless white void, filled with nothing, nothing but the whole leading to those strange sewers and the two Hermans.

“Where are we?” Asked Herman, tidying up his coat and glasses, he came out remarkably clean for being in a sewer. “Don’t worry, follow me, I know a place” the other Herman said as he walked with purpose towards something the other couldn’t seem to see. As they walked, pieces of something started to form, making Herman clean his glasses to make sure he was looking at things right. “Hah, you are really new, aren’t you? You’ve never explored the white void I bet, i mean, that’s why you are reacting like this, correct?” The herman simply swallowed and nodded, feeling nervous.

  “Don’t ask me how any of this works, alright? I don’t know, and honestly? I don’t care.” The pieces came together forming some sort of house, a big one, and rather fancy. The king pulled out from his vest a key, and opened the main door, holding open the door for his more human self. 

  “Welcome” The king simply stated, as he removed his cape and jacket and hanged it on a perch, the other Herman followed, taking off his lab coat. The house was… Nice, really nice, very modern looking, tho a bit too fancy for his likes, it was obvious the king himself adorned this place, filling it with antiques and gold rimmed objects that definitely didn’t need to be. The King guided him to the living room, where with a strong electric shock, the king lit up the chimney, giving everything around it a cozy warm glow. “Come on now, take a seat! I don’t have servants yet but i’m working on it. Meanwhile let me bring you something to drink.” With that, the king left, leaving Herman confused and very lost. Why did the king bring him here? Was this his home? Why was he being so nice to him?? Soon, the king came back, holding a silver tray with two fancy china cups, both steaming with what smelled like coffee. “Don’t get used to this, out of the two, I am the king…. But, you’ve had a rough day, so, i’ll give you a break.” accepting the cup, Herman took a careful sip, only to find out the coffee was absolutely delicious, the king must have notices, because he laughed. “You like it I see! Good, you are a man of taste then, this blend is supposedly brought straight from Mexico! Oh of course, here everything seems to be some sort of… copy, but I can assure you, these taste exactly like the real thing!” Herman simply smiled, and enjoyed the drink as he looked over the flames. Well, as scary as he looked, his other self wasn’t so bad it seemed.

  “Listen Herman,” the king said suddenly, breaking the peaceful silence they had “There is… something, creating us, experimenting on us, using us.” The king looked serious for a moment, looking directly to the other herman, seeing how his glasses reflected the flames in front of them, “That’s why we need to help each other, this thing is obsessed with us, they already have one of us in captivity….” Herman simply listened, surprised by what the king was saying, putting down his finished coffee cup to pay better attention. “We cannot let that happen again, who knows what they want? And judging by those two women i saved you from… It seems they particularly like you. You need to be careful.” A sudden blush came to Herman´s face, fogging up his glasses, those two were rather aggressive on their… interest on himself, and he felt so unbelievably embarrassed by it. Cleaning his throat, he addressed the king trying to appear unfaces “Y-yes I- Uh, I mean, thank you, Herman, I’m glad you were there to help me. I’m still very confused by all of this, but i’m glad to know we can help each other…” With a smile The other Herman waved his hand “Ha, dont worry about it, and hey, i’d rather be called King, that way it will be easier for us to refer to each other, eh? I’m the King, you are Herman. Easy.” 

  “Now then, tomorrow we should see how we shall go on from here, but now? We should rest. Here, follow me.” With that, the King stood up and walked toward the main hall’s stairs, Herman close behind. “Wait! What if they find us here? Don’t misunderstand me, this place is lovely but… It looks so easy to break in to! Shouldn’t we block the doors and windows?” “Oh no, don’t you worry,  my house may not look like a fortress, but trust me, i’ve already got security measures around here, the fanciest, priciest and most useful of all, after all, I don’t waste time with cheap useless things!” The king looked way too proud of himself by saying this, “My home wouldn’t look pretty with guards, cameras and obviously locked doors, wouldn’t it? Trust me, this place is rigged with alarms and other useful measures in case of a break in, if something happens, we will know.” Herman didn’t feel exactly calmer knowing this, but he had no time to argue as they entered one of the many rooms in the house.

  The room was beautiful, a gorgeous king sized bed was in the middle, adorned with pillows and blankets that looked oh so soft and inviting, herman couldn’t help but approach it and rub his face over it, enjoying greatly their silky texture. On the other end of the room, the king opened another door, one that seemed to take you to a walk in closet and a bathroom. He took two items from it, and closed the door. “In here is my closet and bathroom. I made this place only thinking I would live in it with some servants, so, a room dignified of another Herman is not available right now, so, in the meantime, this will be our room. Here, you can wear this.” The king handed Herman a folded piece of fabric, wich, upon unfolding, revealed to be a long silk robe, adorned with an intricate pattern of flowers leaves and swirls. With it, an equally fancy pair tighty whities fell to the floor. A bit escandaliced, Herman yelled “Y-You expect m-mE TO WEAR THESE?” Unimpressed, the king stepped behind his dressing screen, allowing the other to see only his silhouette as hge undressed himself. “What, where you planning on sleeping on those filthy close of yours, right? Besides, we will be sharing a bed, and i don’t want you accidentally brushing against me with those sandpapers” The king stepped out of the screen, wearing a similar robe. Herman was still holding the robe, undies on the floor, red faced from the situation. “Well? What are you waiting for? You may use the screen or change in the bathroom, just hurry up so we can turn off the lights.” Swallowing hard, Herman complied, walking into the bathroom to have more privacy, the screen had allowed him to see a lot more than he hoped, adding to his embarrassment. 

  He usually prefered a tshirt and some long pants for pajamas, and these were simply a bit too revealing to him, another blush came to his face as he undressed and allowed the undies and silk robe to slide in his body. Dang, they felt nice, he couldn’t help but hug himself, enjoying their softness, but a call from the king snapped hi out of it, and as he tightly wrapped the robes around him, he stepped out, and went to the unused side of the bed. “Ah, good, we are the same size I see, i’m glad to know my good looks prevail even when you aren’t as rich as me.” If it was possible, Herman´s blush became even deeper, not used to such comments. The bed was even better than he expected it, the soft sheets, the soft yet firm mattress, and the pillows where so soft and fluffy, he couldn’t help to let out a happy sigh of relief upon laying on them. With a click, the king turned off the lights, and with that Herman took off his glasses, leaving them on the side table. 

  Each one rolled on his side’s, giving eachother their backs, both wanting some space in the bed. It didn’t take long for herman to notice that, even with the bed’s softness and comfiness, it was missing something, he remembered there were blankets when he first saw the bed, where where they now? feeling around with his feet, he had to dive into the covers to realize they were all neatly folded at the very end of the huge bed. The king must have folded them while he was changing… And he didn’t even seem bothered by coldness of the room, so he tried to generate his own body heat, rubbing his feet against the sheets and his hands over his arms as quietly as possible. But of course, the King noticed.

  “Why are you wiggling around so much?!” The room was dark so he couldn’t see him, but he could tell he was annoyed. “S-sorry! It’s just that uhhh, you took all the blankets, and im kinda cold…” he looked where the king was supposed to be, and felt how he turned around to face him, and only his eyes, his red and golden eyes where visible through the darkness, having a glow of their own. They stared at each other for a second before the king interrupted “Oh! hahaha, silly me, i’m so sorry, I totally forgot, you haven’t been touched by the entity… You don’t have mechanical insides that generate heat like me… This might be a problem…” Surprised by that, Herman simply made a questioning sound, “You see, the bed gets unbearably warm when they are over me, so if we pull them over again, i might not be able to sleep from the heat… Hmmm” Both thought for a second, and Herman was the first one to talk. “Oh, well, maybe i should take some blankets and sleep on the couch? You left the chimney lit so-” “What?” the King interrupted, “No, no version of mine will be sleeping on a couch like a commoner… I have a better idea, come here.” Herman seated up, worried, “What? what do you mean come here? besides, it is no trouble i can just-” but the king fed up with him, simply dragged himself over his side, coaxing herman to lay down and get under coves again, after what seemed like a short fight, since herman wasn’t sure what his other self was trying to do, he ended up laying his head on the kings chest, with his arms wrapped around him. “See? Problem solved, I produce enough body heat for the both of us. come on now, you are me and im you, you should not be prude with yourself.” He simply stated, and closed his eyes to sleep again.

  Meanwhile, Herman could not believe this, cuddling with his other self for heat? It was kinda humiliating and kinda inappropriate and kinda… nice. He was so worm, and he could hear the motor of his insides working as his ear was flush against his chest. He wasn’t sure if he could hear more than one motor of if he was hearing his uneven heartbeat too, but he had to admit, it was so soothing and relaxing. And honestly? he hated to admit it but, he felt so safe in the arms of his other, he couldn’t help but sadly smile and hug back. Was this super weird? Yes, and who knows, maybe he was the prude of his selves but right now, he was definitely enjoying himself. With a sigh, both quickly fell asleep, enjoying eachothers company. 

-----   -please---please could you forgive me? :”V -  (( omg i lof this fic AAAHHHH 

#hakurines #herman carter #fan fic writing #fan fic fan art #dbd #w-what can i say? #i don't know what to write in the hashtag #selfcest #submission

[eldonash]

Love to an Immortal || Harsh&Orobas

Location: Harsh’s Place Featuring: Harsh and Orobas, and mentions of Carrington @notsoharsh​ Timeline: Beginning of August Triggers: None, its pretty soft Summary: Harsh invites Orobas over to enjoy some wine and blood, and they snuggle on the couch and talk about what love is for an immortal. 

Orobas has been passing his days in a cloud of confusion. It was worn with a blank face, his attitude and temper short, and most of the people he worked with kept an even wider distance. Harsh had suggested they share a couple blood bags, which was frankly so disgusting. Orobas brought instead, two bottles of blood and wine from his favorite dolls. He already had a lot of strings pulling in the right direction involving Lydia. She may have him bonded into a failed situation, but it didn’t mean he wasn’t sitting idly by as it devoured him. No, he was working on gaining access to her house, and he was setting her up for something heinous. 

“Harsh,” he poured the wine in one glass, wanting to smell it and savor the bite of tang and dryness that most food carried. He sniffed it, fingers long and cradling the liquid, his eyes have been blood red since his injury and even now, they were eerie in the comfortable environment. His complexion was grayed, like he was starving himself, but it wasn’t anything to do with that. The scars on his face would always be there from the holy water, small pockets just along his jawline, only caught when the lighting in a room struck his profile. “Before you decided to get rid of your soul, did you ever love someone?” 

Honestly, the stuff Orobas had brought over was better than what Harsh had tucked away in the fridge. He always forgot how much better it was when it was fresh. Maybe he should go for a hunt. Orobas would probably be up for it. It wasn’t like there was much point in playing the good little vampire now. No one was watching. No one cared. It didn’t matter. As days had gone by since that call, it was starting to seem like nothing did. Breaking things, getting into trouble, it wasn’t the same as it had been before the deal. It was all just hollow. 

The question caught him by surprise, but he nodded as he considered his own glass. “Yeah, I did. I think I’ve told you about her… well, a little anyway. Eleanor. She was the one who turned me. But that was a loooong time ago,” he said, pausing to take a sip. Spiked blood at least never lost its appeal. A rueful smile snuck onto his face. “Back then, I thought she and I were going to be together forever, like you and Haxian. But… even before it all went to shit, that might’ve been wishful thinking. I don’t think I really knew what I was asking for. All I knew was that I wanted to be with her as long as possible.” He paused, shooting Orobas a curious look. “Why do you ask?”

Orobas unbuttoned his deep blue suit jacket, exposing a crisp white shirt underneath, and leaned back on the couch, lounged out over sitting stiffly like he typically did. Likely wrinkling his nice clothes, but Orobas didn’t seem to care right now. He sipped the drink slowly, crimson gaze on his friend. “Hm, I hadn’t entirely put that together. I assumed we all have a bit of a relationship with our masters, not always with our consent.” Orobas absolutely hated that Eleanor died, it was a moment he dwelled on for his friend often. “But love isn’t something I’d define it as. It’s, something else-- I don’t know what.” Orobas didn’t think he loved Haxian. He wanted to please him, keep him impossibly close, and it felt more like they were one of the same person versus a partner. A lot of people said often that any definition of relationship with Orobas was also one with Haxian. 

It made more sense at Harsh’s pain, and though Orobas’ face usually lacked much emotion to it, a soft snarl curled his lips as anger coiled easily. “Mhm,” he took another drink, wanting to relax and not fall into the pit of anger again, and the numbness of wine and blood was welcomed. “I’m in a binding with a Fae at the moment. I have to find true love, or I will keep feeling as bad as I have been. Not sure on the time table, but it’s getting a little unbearable and such things will dissolve for me. Last time I felt this ache, I might have picked a fight with a brood in Berlin. Results, more enemies to say the least. I left that Elder with no one.” He glanced over, Harsh with his suave energy and easy smiles, even when he was brooding. 

“Carrington seems certain I already love someone. I just don’t know who. I’m that ignorant over it.”

“Yeah, I guess that’s true.” Harsh nodded, even as he scrunched up his nose at the word ‘master’. Eleanor had never been that for him. She taught him and guided him, but she was a partner, not a master. And he definitely wasn’t that for any of the vampires he had turned. Most of them had gotten what they wanted and left, or he had. Maybe some of them had wanted that. Harsh never bothered asking. He could tell them how to avoid slayers or the best places to go looking for people to eat, but beyond that, he didn’t really have much in the way of sage wisdom to offer. “Really? Huh. With how long you guys have been together, I guess I kinda figured you guys would have it all worked out by now.”

Brow furrowing, Harsh leaned forward, eyes flicking over Orobas’s face. He hadn’t missed the way he seemed subdued and the almost sickly color of his face. Fae bindings, he had heard of them, but… honestly, he didn’t know much. Someone had told him ages ago to watch what promises he made to certain people, but Harsh hadn’t given that much thought. “True love, huh? I’m guess the fae didn’t give you any instructions on how to do that. That’s… kind of a fairy tale thing though, isn’t it? I mean, how is your fae promise supposed to know it’s true love?”

That last bit did catch his curiosity. “Oh yeah? Did he say who he thought it was or just that you act like you’re in love or something?”

The two definitely didn’t have anything worked out. They existed, like twin shadows that slid into countries, cities, and homes and tormented the world. There weren’t many relationships formed in their long life. A few at most, and the rest of the world simply passed by. Perhaps that was a problem, but to Haxian and Orobas, existence was enough for them. At least until recently, when Orobas wanted more of something he didn’t know how to define. He was the one straying from the norm, the one causing ripples in their relationship. Four hundred years later, and Orobas still might not have felt every emotion. 

“I barely know love, to add the word true as a defining factor means little more to me. This Fae enjoys power, I understand them profoundly in that way, this was a guaranteed way to keep me from killing them. Something impossible, hm? Not a bad play.” 

Orobas drew his hand up into his hair, and combed it back in a sweep to brush it from his eyes. It was rare for him to ever let himself appear this disheveled, but in the back of his mind there was the second piece to that promise that he knew very well. To be vulnerable in front of them. Orobas glanced over to meet Harsh’s gaze. “Hm, Carrington is a romantic. Someone who sees the world differently even while carrying the same immortality burden. He would be the only one who would think I could feel such a thing, or already have..” Orobas chuckled. “Carrington would believe evil could somehow feel such an emotion. I wanted to cut him up for suggesting it, and he still hugged me.”

Orobas still intently looked at Harsh, “I don’t know what sort of love would fulfill the promise. I was hoping it was you to make my life easier. I do care about you more than others.” 

“It seems pretty unfair if they made an impossible promise. Is that allowed?” Harsh sipped at his drink. That didn’t seem right. But he knew next to nothing about fae. He had met a few in his time, maybe more than he knew, but as far as he was aware, he had never made a promise to one. “Even if they like power that much, swearing you to something you can’t do seems like it should backfire on them. But, I don’t think it’s impossible. It’s just… worded weird, like a fairytale. I think true love is out there for you, man. You’ve just gotta find it.”

He couldn’t remember ever seeing Orobas so messy looking before. It wasn’t a bad look on him. Then again, he wasn’t sure anything would be. Orobas had that natural sort of prettiness to him that even four hundred years had not managed to dull. Harsh had noticed before. He wasn’t blind. “Carrington’s sweet, a little soft though. But I mean, he might have a point. I wouldn’t say I’m romantic, but I figure that love looks different to different people. Yours might just look, y’know, different.”

A slow grin spread over Harsh’s face. “Oh yeah? Well, I am pretty loveable. You do give me a lot of leeway on… well, everything. I know I’m your favorite. I… don’t know if I’m a great pick for your ‘true love’ though. The whole, y’know, soul thing… but I’m working on it. Maybe after, I don’t know, we could see what happens.”

“Who knows, I don’t know enough about the Fae,” Orobas laughed gently, greatly amused at how Harsh worded it. He wasn’t one to read like Haxian did, and the word fairytale always sounded so funny to him. Humans write stories about the supernatural, creating warnings for the future generations, or their children. It almost made what he was so much worse-- their glamoured ideas to what was terrifying a little off from the true monster. 

“Carrington had said that exactly as well afterward, so that makes two of my friends believing in me. How cute.” A deep throb of pain made his eyes close, the longer he allowed this promise to feel unobtainable, the worse it was getting. “You are my favorite. Emotions will probably feel overwhelming and beautiful. I can’t wait to see you kill someone with it-- the rush, the entire moment, the feed. Mmm.” His voice tapered off, the thrum of pain wearing on him even with the blood. Maybe he should have brought one of his dolls over the bottles. Blood wasn’t enough to curb this feeling though. 

“Friendship was omitted with that one little word. True--,” Orobas set his glass down and settled more on the couch, clearly in mild distress, but keeping most of it from showing. “Hm, there is someone that might fall into that, but it’s not something I ever cared to admit. Nor she.”

“Me either,” Harsh said, with a little frown. “Maybe I should work on that. I, uh… sort of still have people thinking I’m a slayer. It would be way more convincing if I actually sounded like I know what I’m talking about.” The fact that it hadn’t actually been an issue so far was probably more just dumb luck than anything else. And given the warnings he had gotten since arriving in town and some of the strangeness he had seen and heard, it would probably be a smart move in any case. 

“Aw c’mon, that’s what friends are for, old man.” He gave Orobas a teasing grin as he shifted, lightly nudging at him with his knee. Preening, he pressed a hand to his chest. “Go on, tell me how much you like me. I could listen all night, baby.” 

Smile fading, Harsh sat up, shifting closer to Orobas. His hand was careful as it landed on his back, moving in gentle circles. “Yeah? Who’s that? If you need help tracking her down, I can do that. You seem… rough, man. And I mean that as nicely as possible. Is there anything else we can do to make this easier on you? You wanna go kill something? That always cheers you up.”

Orobas let himself plop, only five people in existence could see him this way, vulnerable and trusting, and Harsh was near the top. He shifted until his head was in his friend’s lap, tossing his legs over the edge of the couch and closed his eyes. With a gentle shift, he encouraged Harsh’s hand into his hair and simply stilled to enjoy the closeness. “I don’t want to do anything right now, just being with you is nice. You have more friends then I don’t you, slayer?” Orobas asked playfully. “I’m jealous, I want all your attention. Playing with hunters, too. How fun. Have you killed any vampires to prove your role?” 

There would be a time that Harsh might want to not do that. But Orobas understood the thrill if could bring, or the necessity.  “No, I see her often. I don’t even know if I feel that exact thing for her, but of anyone-- less Haxian, I have no idea. There isn’t much I can do though. This is what happens when you break promises on this scale apparently. To be honest, this isn’t nearly as bad as gargling holy water. I’m not sure I will ever fully heal from that ordeal.”

Harsh didn’t need much prompting, threading his fingers through Orobas’s hair without hesitation. The closeness was nice, comfortable. Having someone so ruthless, so powerful curling up with him like a kitten was surreal, but in a good way. “I am pretty popular,” he said, teasing right back. “Hey, you get plenty of my time, babe. You know you’re my number one. Not yet. I’m… kinda hoping it doesn’t come to that. If I do, I’ll make sure it’s not anyone you know. There’s this asshole I turned a while ago--Caleb, he could use a good staking if I need to prove myself. But I’m mostly just trying to lay low.”

Grimacing, he gently stroked Orobas’s hair. No wonder he looked so off. Gargling holy water sounded like a nightmare and a half, Harsh would sooner stake himself than try that. “Well, you might as well keep trying with her, see if the feelings start to click. So uh, why were you gargling holy water? I don’t think you told me about that one.”

“I can get you whomever when you need it. There are always vampires coming here that don’t need to be here,” Orobas said easily. Better Harsh uses their death to his advantage, though Orobas wasn’t very shy about dealing with younger vampires. It was an interesting problem to have, being that Harsh could sever a bond with his own blood, but Orobas didn’t judge him for it at all. It was what it was, if Harsh figured that was worth it to keep up appearances. 

Orobas tilted his chin, exposing the underside of his jawline where pocketed scars now resided in blemish. “It burned through the side of my mouth, and jaw. My gums are scarred over as well, enough that it's always aching to even eat. Hm, she requested it, so I really had no choice in the matter. That is the entire thing, my debt to her must be seen as significant if the magic is so binding. I did weirdly enjoy it though, but I have quite the relationship with pain and torture. It will be fine-- in the end, I will have my way with her.” He seemed to ponder a moment. “Do you think love comes from a place of good, Harsh? Or that it’s designed for mortals? What I feel for you and a few others, never felt like any word was enough to describe it.” 

“Oh yeah? If you’ve got some suckers who need to go, I can take them out. That might be easier. If anyone’s giving you trouble, just let me know.” Maybe it was callous, but Harsh had never felt much connection to anyone he had sired. There had been one or two before he had thrown his soul away, though he had lost track of them more than a century ago. And any that came after… they had their uses, he had taught them the ropes and then moved on. It was better that way. 

Harsh’s fingers were careful as they brushed gently over the scars. “Shit,” he muttered. “How long ago was that? You think there’s, I don’t know, some kind of magic that could fix it? I know a couple people, maybe one of them could make some kind of potion.” That was probably a pretty big if. Still, it couldn’t be that hard to fix, right? His fingers moved back to Orobas’s hair almost idly as he considered the question. “I mean, I don’t really know. I feel like it’s a pretty abstract thing. I think… good and bad don’t have much to do with it. It’s just what you feel, right? I don’t think there’s any kind of checklist to fill out on how love works. But if someone’s important to you and they make you happy, I don’t know, maybe that’s love.”

“There is no need,” Orobas grinned, “though magic is fascinating, my body is covered in such things. It’s just another mark, maybe this time, a small reminder of my slip up. I was due one, you can’t go through time like we do and not make mistakes.” Though what wasn’t said was the obsessive factor in all this, that Lydia could keep hurting him if she desired, it would eventually flip, and his turn would be something incredibly worth the pain and frustration. Orobas listened to Harsh explain further on the topic that drew him here. He could listen to him speak for hours, could maybe even humor falling asleep even if it was dreamless meditation. 

Carrington had been intense and direct with his expressions on love, and Harsh seemed to be easily satisfied with the simplest words; happiness, importance. To a mortal who had circles of friends, and family, Orobas only had a handful. Immortality for him wasn’t lonely, he was satisfied with who he had, but it did make his view on this difficult because of it. “Abstract is a good word to describe it, it almost seems impossible to define. Maybe that will be how I get around it. What it means to me, believing my version of it could fulfill the promise. She doesn’t even need to love me.” He said, but the softest furrows met his brow. 

“Tell me, if love is abstract in how you see it, then how do you see vulnerability?” 

“Yeah, I guess your scars are pretty sexy. I’m more talking about the whole… part where it still hurts to eat and stuff. Cause that seems like it would be rough.” Harsh didn’t think about it naturally. Empathy was one of the many things lost to that hollow inside. But… if he forced it, he could at least say that if he was in pain every time he ate, he would start ripping heads off to try to fix it. Then again, Harsh had never been the type to be patient about that. If there was a problem, he was going to fix it as soon as possible, no matter what it took or how many spellcasters he had to go through to get it. 

“That could work. Loopholes are always good. Unrequited love is still love.” That sounded right at least. It probably wasn’t healthy, but whatever. If this fae was going to jerk Orobas around, making him chase after some fairytale dream, why couldn’t he sneak around to get it? “Vulnerability? I don’t know. I guess… it seems a little like a weakness. But I don’t know if it’s always a bad thing. I think I used to like it, kind of. At least with some people. When I was with Eleanor, I could let her see everything, and it was kind of scary, but it also made me feel… safe. Or like she understood me. So… I guess I see it as being kind of risky, but it can be worth it sometimes.”

“I see,” Orobas could picture Harsh enjoying that time. It was a nice visual in his mind, and compared to others, he’d likely not think about it in such a way. Trust and feeling safe were too rare things in his existence. Even if right now he felt both, along with content, and calm. “I think, I don’t stop to think about any emotions-- now that I have been asking about them. For existing as I have, it wasn’t something that required it. It’s funny-- people make the assumption that I don’t have a soul, and I always had wondered why. Maybe not acknowledging the smallest of emotions has given that impression.” 

He didn’t aim to poke that sore spot for Harsh, but Orobas, even in such a good mood, could be cruel. “I wonder if Haxian can feel love, now transforming-- going beyond what we are. I have never had the desire to mutter such things to him. Through so many centuries. I should do it shouldn’t I? I might get thrown out a window though, and I live in a high building.” Orobas laughed genuninely amused by the visual, there was a lightness in him that he rarely felt. Like the pain from the promise was unraveling slowly without his awareness. “Hm, it’s probably saying too much. But I’m not opposed to learning new things. Come on, read to me. Anything, I don’t care what. Let me rest a little.”

“Yeah? I mean, I don’t think most people think about those things too much. People just kinda feel their feelings.” Harsh laughed softly as he brushed Orobas’s hair back from his forehead then smoothed it down again. Honestly, he had thought the same at first. Orobas did sort of fit the bill, he was similar to other soulless vampires Harsh had crossed paths with. But… not completely. Despite the blood dolls and the casual way he dealt with killing, Orobas could understand other people in a way Harsh had left behind two centuries ago. “I think most people just don’t really get how the whole ‘lack of soul’ thing works.”

Harsh cocked an eyebrow before shrugging as he dug his phone out of his pocket. “I’ve got a couple ebooks on here, some news stuff--oh yeah, I took a bunch of pictures of these books from the old Scribe HQ. It’s a lot of informational stuff, but some of it’s actually pretty interesting.” He flicked through his pictures for a minute before settling on a nice long passage. “This one’s actually about soul stuff. Let me see, ‘the soul is less of a spirit and more a manifestation of the self’...” 

Harsh didn’t even delay. Not a millisecond pause to give him grief over his small request. The undercurrent of exhaustion from not fulling this promise, and even pushing back against it had made him tired. “Thank you,” Orobas hummed lightly, and listened to Harsh read until it seemed like he fell asleep. 

#x: what is love to an immortal #x: harsh

[wolfie-posts]

Kiss and Run Ch.2

Bakugou Katsuki x Female!Reader

Read Chapter 1 here

Author: @wolfie-posts

Warning: language

Chapter length: 7,920 words

Story Summary:

You did it! You were given the opportunity to study at U.A. alongside class 1A to become a pro-hero. Within the next three years, you were gonna learn more about yourself and your special quirk, about friendship, about fighting, winning and losing. The road to your goal is bumpy and steep with a lot of obstacles like villains and an explosive blond boy, who decided to make your life a little harder. Will you finally be able to control your quirk? Will you overcome the problems together with your classmates along the way?

A/N: Hello lovelies, I hope you enjoy the new chapter, it’s way longer than the first one and I hope to keep the chapter-length up like that. Also a special thanks to @plus-ultra-me for helping me, without you this wouldn’t have been possible!

AO3

Quotev

Wattpad

________________________________________

"This is it" you muttered looking down at the letter from U.A. You were holding the letter very carefully in your hands as if it would break if you held it too tight. You weren’t the only one looking anxiously at the letter, your parents were nervous wrecks with identical tense grimaces plastered over their faces, not able to peel their eyes off the letter in front of them.

"What are you waiting for? Open it!" they spoke at the same time, simultaneously breaking the silence. Their voices were a little bit louder than normal and you could clearly hear the excitement and worry in them.

"If you ehm.. don't mind, I would.. rather open it in private," you exclaimed quietly, gulping down the lump in your throat. You couldn't bring yourself to meet your parent's eyes while saying that, knowing they shared the thrill of anticipation with you.

The importance of this letter made your chest heavy and clouded your head, sending your thoughts running wild.

'What if I didn't make it?

How will I be able to control my power then?

What if.. what if I’m too weak...

What if all my effort was for  nothing?'

Frozen into place, the color drained from your parents’ faces when you told them you wanted to be left alone. A pale and empathic look now replacing the grimaces.

"O-Of course sweetie! I’m sorry.. w-we got kinda carried away there." your mother said with a soft and kind voice, giving you a reassuring smile.

"Take your time kiddo. You can tell us when you are ready. Just know that we love you and we are really proud of you, no matter what that letter says!" your dad added and patted your head affectionately.

Entering your room, you closed the door quietly behind you and took a seat at your desk, the letter still in hand. 

For about five minutes you just stared at it, anticipation and fear gnawing at your insides. You were scared, even though you had a good feeling about how the entrance exam went. Not knowing what the letter said just seemed a lot better at the moment because right now it could be a yes or no, the second you open the letter your future would be decided. With shaking hands, you were mentally preparing for the worst-case scenario.

"Here goes nothing" you whispered, ripping open the letter and revealing a small technical device that dropped onto your desk and lit up the whole room.

"Hello Y/N L/N, I am here as a projection. I came back to town to teach at U.A. So now I have the honor of telling you that you passed the written and practical exam to get into U.A. You got 40 villain points but it wasn't only graded on those. How can a hero course not include the fact that some people saved others and risked their lives to do the right thing? That is why you also gained rescue points." All Might explained to you with his signature smile.

Jaw drop.

The projection showed the examination results of all the contestants that made it into U.A. You couldn't believe your eyes when you saw your name at the ranking list. You were actually shared first place with somebody else, having both gained 77 points in total.

"Congratulations on making it into U.A. I can't wait to teach you!"  Just like that, the projection ended with All Might giving you a brilliant and shining smile with a thumbs up.

"W-Wait... WHAT?!" you stuttered while yelling, not believing what had just happened. Tears started to well up in the corner of your eyes.

"I-I did it.." you mumbled, realization slowly kicking in.

"HOLY SHIT! MOM, DAD, I DID IT! I GOT IN!" you yelled, a wave of emotions crashing over you.

It didn't even take three seconds before your parents kicked in the door and tackled you with a hug. You knew they were impatiently waiting in front of your door but who could blame them. Having them nearly suffocate you with their love just made this situation all the more real. You didn't know if you were laughing or crying anymore. A muffled sound from above made you look up to see their faces.

After that amazing news they just couldn't hold back anymore, happy tears were streaming down their faces. For strangers, this surely would have been a rare and weird sight, three people hugging each other while bawling their eyes out but even so, you wouldn't have it any other way.

'I will finally be able to be a hero and learn how to make good use of my powers!'

----First day at U.A.----

You were late. Not only late but like really fucking late for your first day at U.A. 'How could this happen?!' you thought while running down the sidewalk.

"Ugh, why did this have to happen to me on such an important day?!" you whined, underneath your breath, picking up your speed when the school entrance came into sight.

Your eyes were all over the place searching for room 1-A when you finally arrived at your new school.

"Found it!" Without hesitation, you slammed open the door and rushed in. There was no time for worrying about having everybody's eyes on you the moment you set foot into the classroom. Your breathing was heavy, cheeks pink from sprinting all this way to school. Small drops of sweat were forming on your forehead.

"SORRY I AM LATE THERE WAS A STRAY CAT AND A HOMELESS GUY TRIED TO TAKE-" you bowed deeply but before you could even finish your rambling, you could hear a chair squeak followed by a terrifying voice.

"YOU!" a familiar blond boy yelled, although it was more like a terrifying roar, making you tense up immediately.

'Oh fuck' was all you could think, stammering out a trembling and intimidated "Me", knowing damn well you were screwed.

"I AM GOING TO KILL Y-"

"Sit down Bakugou, class has already started." the teacher interrupted the boy nonchalantly, who was about to blow up the whole classroom.

Bakugou obediently sat back down but not without glowering at you. You never would have thought that he was the kind of guy to listen to what the teacher had to say. His crimson eyes shone with murderous intent and send a shiver down your spine. Mumbling something inaudible, the teacher's attention turned back to you and he gave you an unimpressed look.

"You must be Y/N L/N then. It's fine just sit down," he said with a blank stare.

"Yes Sir," you said, bowing apologetically once more but when you stood up straight again your head was hanging a little lower.

'What a great start' you thought sarcastically to yourself and went to sit down at the only unoccupied seat, clutching your bag protectively to your chest.

"Time is precious, rational students would understand that. Anyways, I am Shota Aizawa your homeroom teacher. Let's get right to it, we have wasted enough time already." he said pulling something out of his sleeping bag.

'Why the hell does he have a sleeping bag with him? I mean he does kinda look worn out but he is a pro-hero, right? I probably shouldn't judge a book by its cover'

Your train of thought got interrupted by the thing Aizawa pulled out from his yellow bag.

"Put these on and head outside," he said with a kind of fed up and bored voice. In his hand was a typical U.A. sports uniform in blue with red and white detailing, you had seen those before on television at the annual sports tournament.

After changing, you and your classmates all meet outside on the training ground.

"Everyone here? Great, let's get started with the quirk assessment test." Aizawa announced, leaving you all in shock.

"What? A quirk assessment test?" you all blurt out in sync. The first one to really speak up was a cute girl with brown hair and pink cheeks.

"But orientation! We're gonna miss it." she said with a sad undertone to her voice, expressing what you all felt and thought.

"If you want to make it in the big leagues you can't waste time on pointless ceremonies." your teacher silenced the girl and anyone else who thought about speaking up.

You all gasped, taken aback from the harsh but true words your homeroom teacher was saying.

"Here at U.A., we are not tethered to traditions. That means that I get to run my class however I see fit. You have been taking standardized tests for most of your life but you never got to use your quirks in physical exams before. The country is still trying to pretend we are all created equal by not letting those with the most power excel. It’s not rational. One day the Ministry of Education will learn. Bakugou, you and a... classmate... managed to get the most points on the entrance exam. Please step forward." A familiar ash blond boy stepped to the front, fists, and jaw clenched with a dark vibe spreading around him as he waited for the teacher to move on.

"In junior high, what was your best result for the softball throw?" Aizawa asked looking straight at him.

"67 meters I think," Bakugou replied, his eyes still fierce and brows knitted.

"Right, try doing it with your quirk. Anything goes, just stay in the circle. Go on." Aizawa said impatiently.

"Alright man, you asked for it!" Bakugou said cockily while stretching his throw-arm. He picked up one of the balls that were laying to the side. As he took in his stance, you could see the determination in his crimson eyes, which sent a weird jolt through your body.

The moment Bakugou let go of the ball a terrifying "DIE" escaped his lips, sending the ball flying off with an explosion, where the eye couldn't follow anymore.

"D-Did he just yell 'die'?" you stuttered looking at the green-haired boy next to you, who looked as frightened as you did.

"I-I think so,” he said with a pale face.

'Oh god... what have I gotten myself into?' you thought, facepalming yourself internally.

"All of you need to know your maximum capabilities. It's the most rational way of figuring out your potential as a pro-hero." your teacher said, holding up a device that measured the distance from the throw.

You gulped down hard when you saw the numbers on the screen. 'Fucking 705.2 meters' A boy behind you was just as impressed as you, although probably everybody was impressed by that quirk.

"Wow, 705.2 meters? Are you kidding me?" the guy said, disturbed but still fascinated.

Everybody started to get hyped up. You could hear them excitedly talk about how they were gonna kill it in the test but you weren't so happy. Sure your physical abilities were outstanding, better than average kids but how were you gonna keep up with quirks like firecrackers over there?

"So this looks fun, huh?" Aizawa broke up the happy chattering. "You have three years here to become a hero. Do you think it's all gonna be games and playtime? Idiots. Today you will compete in 8 physical tests to see how much potential you have. Whoever comes in last has none and will be expelled immediately."

Nearly everyone's jaw dropped. All around you, you could see the shock and worry written over their faces. Scanning the crowd you caught a glimpse of the guy Bakugou and your stomach dropped, even more, seeing him grinning evilly.

"I should have figured you would like this" you mumbled to yourself, rolling your eyes and clenching your jaw, feeling your palms getting sweaty. Why were you even scared? You had great chances of doing well on this test. You maybe wouldn't come out on top again like in the entrance exam but you surely wouldn't get cut.

"As I said, I get to decide how this class runs, understand? If that's a problem you can head home right now." This sure was a weird way of pep-talking you into doing your best. Pink-cheeks was the first one to speak up again. 'Damn this girl has balls' you thought, while mentally making a note to befriend her. It wouldn't be bad to have someone like her on your good side.

"You can't send one of us home. I mean, we just got here. Even if it wasn't our first day, it still wouldn’t be fair! " Pink-cheeks was just again stating what you were all feeling but you realized it was useless. Aizawa just said that he makes the rules so you weren't gonna give him a reason to kick you out right on the sport for speaking up. You glanced over to Pink-cheeks who was pouting and puffing her cheeks in frustration.

'Being so adorable is gonna be her downfall. Honestly, if she didn’t look so innocent, I'd probably be scared of her' you thought, staring at the short girl. Aizawa's voice snapped you out of your thoughts as he started to speak again.

"Oh, and you think natural disasters are? Or power-hungry villains hmm? Or catastrophic accidents that wipe out whole cities? No! The world is full of unfairness. It's a hero's job to try to reduce that unfairness. If you wanna be a pro you have to push yourself to the brink. For the next three years, U.A. will throw one terrible hardship after another at you. So go beyond, plus ultra style! Show me it's no mistake that you are here!" That intimidation and scary pep-talk created a change in atmosphere. Everybody was getting hyped again and their faces had a look of determination on them as if they were ready to take on the world.

"Now then, we are just wasting time by talking. Let the games begin."

The first test was a 50-meter dash. Engine-calves and frog-girl had the honor of starting you off into the test. It was the first time seeing everybody's quirk in action. There wasn't much time for you to notice them during the entrance exam, so this was actually pretty interesting for you. You saw the next group getting ready for the dash and recognized the adorable pink-cheeked girl. Eyeing her closely you could see her touch her clothes while getting ready to run. She finished at 7.15 seconds, which was pretty good. You wanted to tell her that yet your words got caught in your throat, and a small voice inside your head reminded you that this was a competition.

They all had amazing test results but one obviously stood out: Bakugou straight-up fired himself over the finish line within 4.13 seconds.

"Damn, guess those explosions really work for him" you laughed to yourself, getting the attention of the girl next to you.

"Somebody has already an eye on someone, I see," she giggled. "It seems like we’re up next, the name is Mina Ashido." the pink alien girl said with a bright smile holding out her hand.

You gladly took it and returned the smile. "Don't mistake my disliking for a crush." you laughed, "Blasty and I became sworn enemies before I even knew his name but nevertheless, nice to meet you too. My name is Y/N L/N but you can just call me by my first name." the pink girl had such a bubbly personality, it brought up your mood right away, replacing your frown with a bright smile.

"Haha, I know who you are. It's hard not to since you were like totally late today and got the highest score on the entrance exam. Just don't get too confident, I am still gonna kick your ass." she winked and got ready at the start line.

"You better keep your word then," you said with a grin getting down into position. The robot on the finish line started to countdown and as the start signal rang through your ears you started off into a mad dash but only after three seconds you could see Ashido skating ahead of you in the corner of your eyes. She crossed the finish line at 5.35 and you followed close by 6.61.

"Told you I'd beat ya" she smiled confidently and struck a pose, you couldn't help but laugh at that sight, that girl just made you drop your guard without even trying. "Atta girl" you high fived her and went to the others who had already finished the first test.

"I really thought you would be more arrogant and bitchy. I totally misjudged you. I’m sorry." Ashido said while standing next to you, scratching the back of her head.

"Well, I just got lucky on the entrance exam. My quirk isn't that—" but you cut yourself off, not wanting to reveal too much about your quirk. "I mean, my dad can manipulate anything that has a technical circuit so you know, I manage." you smiled awkwardly back at her.

"You didn't have to justify it but I appreciate it. Let's just hope we both get through today because you and I are gonna be besties from now on!" she giggled and threw her arm around your shoulder.

The next test was grip strength and due to your enhanced physical abilities, you did pretty good in comparison to the kids who didn't have a mutation or physical enhancement as an advantage. One guy even got 540 kilograms which send your thoughts running off again, imagining being crushed in a six-armed hug by that guy. Although maybe that actually made his hugging skills superb.

Test number three was the standing long jump, which was a little harder with no special quirk. You were talking with Ashido and some of your other classmates waiting for your turn when Bakugou rammed his shoulder into you, causing you to lose your balance and land on your ass. "What the—" Before you could even finish your surprised and pained shriek, a growl cut you off.

"YOU’RE IN MY WAY, SHITFACE!" your mouth was ajar, you couldn’t get to terms with how rude that guy was.

"You know, you could’ve just gone the other way..." you quietly mumbled back at him, brushing the dirt from your sports uniform. Bakugou simply didn't care about what you had to say but he surely didn't expect you to go all quiet on him, which made him even more furious. He walked off, infuriated by your presence alone not giving you a second glance.

"What an ass!" you heard the group in unison say but you waved them off. There was no need for them to get involved even though you appreciated regardless..

"It's fine guys, I can handle him. I mean it's my fault, to begin with," you said, mumbling the last part a bit. You scratched the back of your head trying to hide your discomfort about this situation. 

"I kinda got in his way during the entrance exam and well, I guess he blames me for not getting more points. I just really wish we could leave that behind us it's kinda exhausting and it's only been a day. Maybe I should just apologize..." a laugh escaped your mouth, it sounded weird but you just wanted to cover up the sadness you were feeling. You really didn't want to be anyone's enemy. You never intended to do anything bad. Trying to push away the sickening feeling in your stomach, you gave the others a forced smile.

There wasn't really any time for the others to question you about it because you were the next one up. Training your legs has always been one of your favorite things to do, so when you pushed off the ground with all your strength, you actually got a pretty acceptable result, nothing compared to Laser-Belly-Button or Bakugou who once more catapulted themselves to the other side with their quirks but still, you were pleased with your score.

You quickly got out of the way for the next person, it was a guy with red spikey hair. He was kinda cute so you figured you could stay to watch his jump along the sidelines. Up until now, you haven't really paid much attention to the red-haired boy but that was about to change.

His jump was great. 'He clearly trains a lot' you observed but you also noticed that he didn't use his quirk just like you. His score came pretty close to yours too and as his ass landed into the sand, you decided to start a conversation with him. After the robot announced his score and Aizawa made notes of it, you walked up to the boy in the sand and held out your hand.

"Not using your quirk either I see. By the way, I like your hair", you smiled at him. He looked a bit dumbfounded for a second staring up at your hand. He gathered himself quickly, giving you a big smile in return as he let you pull him up.

"Haha, thanks," he said attempting to hide his light blush by dusting off his pants. "Yeah my quirk doesn't really help me when it comes to most of the exercises," he explained while walking to the sidelines with you.

"Oh, by the way, I am Kirishima Eijiro." Today just wasn't your day, you were about to answer Kirishima, but someone just had to bump into you again, sending you tumbling forward and hitting a way too hard chest in front of you, before your ass hit the ground a second time today.

"Oopsie, that's on me I misjudged my speed a bit there." you could hear the familiar giggle from Ahido behind you. She was so excited to see you talk to one of her best friends Kirishima, that she just had to jump into the conversation. No way in hell was she gonna let this opportunity slip to lay the groundwork for a squad.

As you were laying on the ground a hand suddenly came into your vision. It was Kirishima who was holding his hand out towards you with a guilty smile plastered on his face.

"Sorry, I kinda used my quirk on accident. Hope I didn't hurt ya" you could feel the heat rising in your cheeks, taking Kirishima's rough hand for support, you hid your face behind some strands of hair.

"Well, I have to say your muscles are rock solid, it was like hitting a wall, that actually hurt a little." you laughed, trying to hide your embarrassment.

"So.." the pink girl interrupted the two of you throwing an arm over Kirishima's and your shoulder. "Y/N, this is Kirishima, Kirishima this is Y/N," Ashido said with a big stupid grin on her face, pushing herself off of your shoulders and jumping in front of you. She turned around to the two of you again, her eyes glowing with excitement, while she leaned forward and clapped in her hands. "Now that you have met, we can totally start hanging out together! I mean assuming that we all pass this test." she rambled on while jumping around like a hyperactive bouncy ball full of happiness.

"Ehmm sure?" you said but it sounded more like a question, scratching your head, you tried to understand what had just happened. Ashido's words and energy were a little bit overwhelming, so you didn't know how to react right away, but deep down you knew that this was the beginning of a great friendship.

"Looks like the two of you know each other pretty good already, huh?" you asked, looking between the two of them.

"Oh yeah, pinky and I are horn-buddies," Kirishima laughed taking Ashido's head underneath his arm in a headlock and ruffled her hair. She was squirming underneath Kirishima's grip trying to free herself but he wasn't even bothered by her attempts to escape, he just kept on messing up her hair. You couldn't hold back your laughter it was such an amusing scene to watch, Kirishima and Ashido soon after joined in with your contagious laugh.

"Damn right!" Ashido giggled "I know this one from middle school," she said while elbowing Kirishima into his side, making him lose his grip on her and giving her a chance to jump away to freedom.

"Anyways," Ashido smiled while fixing her hair "What were you two talking about?" she asked curiously.

"Oh yeah! I was about to explain my quirk to Y/N," Kirishima said facing you. "So.. my quirk is hardening, I can literally turn myself rock-solid" he grinned and stuck his tongue out teasingly, using your words to describe his quirk.

"Just show her already!" Ashido said with an overdramatic annoyed expression while making some big hand gestures. She got a bit carried away in the act and accidentally letting loose some of her acids. A sudden gasp from behind her, made her abruptly stop waving her arms around. The gasp came from a boy who just barely dodged her acid as he was walking over to your group. 

"Hey, watch the acid!" he laughed at the hyperactive alien girl. "Sorry about that," she said shyly, holding her hands behind her back as a precaution.

"What's going on over here?" the boy asked looking at you and Kirishima in confusion.

"Hey Kaminari, I was about to show Y/N here my quirk," Kirishima said with a proud grin flexing his biceps.

"You are such a show-off, Kirishima," the guy who apparently was called Kaminari said while playfully shoving his elbow into Spiky-hair’s side.

Kirishima just shrugged his shoulders in response and grinned. He looked back at you and took in his own special kiai stance, smashing his fists together in a satisfying thud. As his fists collided, his skin instantly changed, it looked like the surface and texture of actual rocks and it wasn't just his arms, the rock-like texture spread out over his whole body, even his hair turned solid and sharp.

"Damn Kirishima, your quirk is amazing! You will make such a good hero with that quirk.. Damn, I wish I had a quirk like that. No wonder it hurt when I hit your chest, you must be super strong! Do you train a lot? Pff obviously, look at those arms! Wait, can you like... cut through stuff with your hands like that? OHH.. can you smash a wall?? Oh my god, that would be so crazy! Can I touch it?"

You rambled in admiration and curiosity, gaining the weird and bewildered looks of the three in front of you. You didn't quite realize what you had just babbled but it made Ashido and Kaminari break into a fit of laughter, the confused look you gave them just made it worse. They were laughing even louder, tears in their eyes and faces bright red from the lack of oxygen. It was the moment your eyes meet Kirishima's and he rapidly looked away, that you realized what you had said. You covered your mouth in shock, feeling the heat rush into your face, even your ears were heating up from the embarrassment. Kirishima was looking away desperately trying to hide the rose color in his cheeks but you could still see it, which made the situation even more embarrassing.

"I-I didn't mean it like t-that!" you stammered out, wishing the ground would swallow you whole right then and there.

"Yeees Kirishima! Let her touch it!" Kaminari snorted, he and Ashido were now on the ground, rolling around in laughter. 

"Jeeez, I didn't know you were that bold" Ashido said. It was like pouring gasoline into the fire. You felt awkward hiding your face behind your fingers but the embarrassment was just too much. It felt like your face was on fire and an itchy feeling spread out through your legs, making you want to run away.

"What’s happening over here?" you heard an unknown voice from behind you. 'Oh god... noo! Please don't!' you thought suddenly wishing you had invisible girl's quirk, so you could disappear.

"Hahahaha, Sero you won't believe what Y/N just said!" Kaminari snorted facing the guy who was now standing next to you.

"She asked Kirishima if she could-" but he got interrupted by your panicked scream "AHH!" and before you even knew it, you were on the ground with Ashido and Kaminari, holding a hand in front of his mouth to shut him up.

"Lets just all.. forget about this okay?" you asked in a stressed-out voice, giving Ashido and Kaminari your most terrifying death glare ever. They both nodded their heads in agreement, making you sigh in relief.

"Great!" you said in a happy voice, trying to overplay the death of embarrassment you nearly had one minute ago.

"We should probably head to the next exercise. Don't you think? Yeah! I thought so. Kaminari, Ashido lets go!" Holding onto their arms, you started to speed-walk to the next test, where some of the others were already waiting, dragging the two with you so they couldn't embarrass you even further in front of Kirishima and that new guy.

Stifled laughter made your head snap back to the two figures you were dragging along, their faces weren't as red as before but you could still see their devious grins and watery eyes from laughing too hard. This made you even more irritated, you were gritting your teeth, forcing the blush, which was creeping up your face again, away. 

"I swear if you tell anyone about this, you won't live to see another day!" you growled at them, getting them to defensively raise their hands in return while yelling "Yes, ma'am!"

The next and fourth test was repeated side steps, which was the best exercise for the purple-ball-hair child. It was kinda impressive to watch him bounce against his hair? It was just your gut, but you had something against that child. You haven't even talked to him but your stomach was already telling you that you shouldn't even try to talk to him at all. Everybody was chatting and having fun using their quirks, you observed all but one person, no actually two people stood out. The green-haired guy who you had already exchanged a sentence or two with and Bakugou. Both of them were standing a little bit on the outside not engaging with the other classmates with the only difference between the two of them being, that Bakugou had a pissed facial expression and the green-haired boy looked like he just pissed himself. Seriously though, that kid looked like he was about to pass out, his face was all scrunched up and tense and he was trembling with a look of plain terror in his eyes.

'I really don't wanna know what that kid is thinking right now, his face is giving me nightmares already!' you thought shaking your head and walking over to Ashido, Kirishima, Kaminari and some other classmates you didn't know yet.

The softball throw was test number five and you were watching alongside all your classmates how everyone was doing. It wasn't really that interesting because most of the quirks weren't as explosive as Bakugou's, for example. It started to get interesting when the name "Uraraka" got called by Aizawa, making you elbow Ashido next to you. "Do you know her?" you asked mesmerized by the fearless, adorable girl from the beginning.

"Noo, not really," you heard Ashido next to you think out loud.

"Her name is Ochako Uraraka," the boy next to you said, it was the green-haired guy from before. "WOW, where did you come from?" you asked taken aback from his sudden appearance.

"S-Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you..uhh-" he began, noticing your flinch but you didn't give him the time to think your reaction over, you just smiled at him tilting your head a bit "My name is Y/N!"

The boy returned your smile shyly while scratching the back of his head "Oh, I knew that already but I thought it would be rude to call you by your name because we actually haven't introduced ourselves yet and-" but you cut him off, to stop him from starting an audible inner monologue, scared you would see his scared and terrified look from before again. 

You were waving your hands in front of you while shaking your head with a confused smile "Hey, it's fine just... tell me your name," you said snapping the boy back into your conversation.

"Oh right, sorry... my name is Midoriya Izuku," he answered shyly and you could see a very light shade of pink slowly covering his cheeks.

"So, do you know Uraraka? Or do you like... keep tabs on everybody in a notebook or something?" you joked, but your smile fell when you saw his face become bright red with an alarming look in his eyes.

"Oh god... you do?!" every part of you went on pause while your thoughts caught up to you, your mouth hung with lips slightly parted and your eyes were as wide as they could stretch. You slowly turned away from Midoriya, facing the exercise that was going on in front of you once more.

'Don't overthink this! Don't do it!' you scolded yourself but it didn't help.

'I have to stay away from that kid.. does he already know about my quirk? Did he like snoop through all of our U.A. files? He looks so innocent, there is no way in hell he could have gotten that information. I better keep my distance... I don't want him to catch up on my quirk and how I activate it.' an elbow to your ribs, snapped you out of your thoughts.

"Dude, what's with that look on your face?" Ashido asked, quirking an eyebrow and gaining your full attention at once.

"Uhhhh... I was just lost in thought..." you said, that answer didn't really satisfy Ashido. She shrugged and pointed forward "Your girl-crush is about to throw, better snap out of it," she chuckled, getting the exact reaction she wanted from you.

"W-What?!? Hold your fucking horses, I never said she was my girl-crush!" you said defensively, trying to stay calm but you could already feel your ears starting to heat up again.

"Calm down!" Ashido laughed, "I was just teasing." and without another word, you looked back towards Uraraka.

Pink-cheeks threw the ball and it rose up to the sky with a constant speed, there wasn't even a waver in the motion of the ball, it rose higher and higher without any signs of stopping soon. Your gaze fell towards Aizawa, who was staring down at the device, he turned towards the group of you and you could see the infinity symbol on the screen.

"Infinity?" everybody asked in unison, some in shock, others in admiration and the green-haired boy again totally terrified.

You heard Kaminari mutter a "That's insane! How is that possible?" Your classmates mumbling quieted down when Aizawa called Midoriya's name.

"Dude, he looks like he's about to shit his pants" the pink girl chuckled next to you, making you feel kinda bad for the boy but he really did look like he had a bad stomach ache.

"That kid has had this look on his face since Aizawa told us about the test. I’m guessing he thinks he is gonna get cut," you said, crossing your arms in front of you. "Why the hell is he so damn terrified? I mean he got past the entrance exam. Unless his quirk is useless for all of those exercises..." you thought out loud, getting the attention of Engine-calves who was standing in hearing distance from you.

"If Midoriya doesn't shape up soon, he will be the one going home," the boy with glasses said with a serious expression.

"HUUH? Of course, he is, he’s a quirkless loser!" Bakugou interrupted the guy in annoyance, but glasses-guy wasn't having his bullshit.

"He has a quirk! Did you not hear about what he did in the entrance exam?" Engine-calves asked confused, giving Bakugou a judging look like a nerd looking at someone who didn't do their homework.

You were all staring at Midoriya as he was about to throw when you suddenly noticed Aizawa's scarf and hair going all crazy. "What the fuck..." you mumbled as the ball from Midoriya's hand landed 46 meters in front of him.

"I erased your quirk" Aizawa spoke in a dangerous and dark tone and when you got a glimpse of his profile, glowing red eyes were replacing his tired black ones. "The judges for the entrance exam were not rational enough. Someone like you should’ve never been allowed to enroll at this school." he continued while staring down at the boy. 'Ouch,' you thought to yourself 'poor kid'.

"Wait you did what to my..." Midoriya started but he cut himself off with an unmanly gasp "Those goggles! I know you! You can look at someone and cancel out their powers... the eraser hero 'Eraserhead'!" the green-haired boy yelled out of surprise.

'Damn, that kid really keeps tabs on all of us... what a stalker!'

Everybody around you started to discuss this newfound information. 

"Eraserhead? Who is that?" you heard most of them ask, some of them even said they had heard of him before but that wasn't really the thing on your mind right now. As much as it scared and pained you, you turned towards Bakugou.

"Ey Bakug-" you tried to get his attention, which worked pretty well because he fired an insult right back at you before you could even finish saying his name.

"Who the fuck told you that you could just talk to me, shitface?" he growled at you, crimson eyes glaring into your soul but you weren't having his bullshit either. You had a question and you needed an answer for the sake of your mind's peace. But first, you had to bite down on your lip to force down the anger that was boiling up inside you.

"You said Midoriya is quirkless? How come Eraserhead is canceling out his quirk then?" you asked curiously because you knew for a fact that Bakugou was everything but a liar. He also wasn't stupid enough to throw accusations around without reason, ignoring the fact that he throws out insulting nicknames.

"We went to the same fucking middle school and he didn't have a quirk back then!" he hissed looking back at the green-haired boy who was wrapped in Aizawa's scarf. 

‘Probably getting probably a scary pep talk’ you figured, remembering the speeches the teacher gave you guys at the beginning of testing. You watched how he let go of the boy and the crazy hair and scarf of your teacher returned to normal, eyes going back to black. He was walking away from Midoriya and you could hear Engine-calves speak up again. 

"I wonder if our teacher gave him some advice..." he mumbled while rubbing his chin, he sounded a bit worried although you didn't know if it was on behalf of Midoriya or out of selfish reasons.

"Probably told him to start packing!" Bakugou interrupted the boy clearly pissed at this whole situation or maybe because you had talked to him minutes ago.

With a sudden newfound determination, you watched how Midoriya threw, more like catapulted the ball straight into the sky with such power it reminded you of Bakugou's explosive throw. Everybody gasped in shock, not expecting this at all. While everyone was looking at Midoriya, your eyes automatically fell upon Bakugou, you couldn't help it. 

He was frozen into place, crimson eyes wide open with his jaw on the ground, you could even see a vein popping in his temple. You could feel the air around you getting slightly hotter and a whiff of caramel reached your nose. "Oh no..." you mumbled, knowing exactly what was about to happen. The ash-blond boy set off into a mad dash, screaming in rage: "HEY DEKU, YOU BASTARD, TELL ME HOW YOU DID THAT OR YOU’RE DEAD!" You were sure that if Midoriya hadn't shit his pants before this point, he definitely had now. Everything happened pretty fast which was kinda refreshing, Aizawa had Bakugou pinned into place by his scarf, meters away from a trembling Midoriya.

"What? Why the hell is your damn scarf so strong?" Bakugou struggled, turning his head slightly to give Aizawa his signature death glare.

"Because it's a capture-weapon made out of carbon fiber and a special metal alloy. Stand down. It would be wise to avoid making me use my quirk so much. It gives me serious dry eye." your teacher said in an annoyed tone, making your class yell in sync: "Too bad... that power is amazing!"

'Like seriously? Is this some sort of choir or does everybody happen to know how to use telekinesis?' you rolled your eyes at the comment from your classmates.

"You’re wasting my time now. Whoever is next can step up." your homeroom teacher scoffed while retreating his scarf and walking off.

"Is your finger okay?" the adorable Pink-cheeks girl asked Midoriya worried, which made your eyes shift to his hand. His finger was purple, bruised and totally crooked, you could even see the misplacement of the bones although it wasn't even an open fracture. 

"Sure, I’m fine!" the boy said giving Uraraka a forced smile but you could clearly see him wince in pain when he moved his hand. Your brain was going into overdrive again, not able to comprehend what was happening. How can this 'quirkless boy' out of nowhere have a quirk which apparently isn't even accustomed to his body?

Bakugou, who was still standing in the same spot was trembling in anger, his thoughts were colored in red, the fury inside of him was making him numb to the pain he was conflicting to himself by clenching his fists so tightly that his knuckles were white and his nails dug into his skin.

A frown was plastered on your face as you watched the ash-blond boy intensely. He was like a fixed point in your brain because your eyes were constantly drawn to him and you couldn't do anything about it. You should’ve been glad that he had Midoriya to hate, bully and harass now but seeing Bakugou in that state made you kinda sad.

'Get it together!' you thought to yourself, shaking your head aggressively to force those thoughts out of your head. Why do you even care about how Bakugou might be feeling right now? Why did you want to know the reason for his never stopping anger so badly?

You had to clear your head and what could be a better way to do that than doing some sit-ups? Without hesitation, you pulled Mina and the rest with you to the sixth exercise, where you had to do sit-ups in pairs.

"Hey Kirishima, you wanna pair up with me for this exercise?" you asked the red-haired boy after Mina had already paired up with Kaminari, giving you a devilish wink while suggesting you should ask Kirishima.

"Yeah! Let's do this!" Kirishima cheered, pumping one of his fists into the air. 'That boy really loves his workouts' you chuckled to yourself.

You were able to do quite a lot of sit-ups, which was part of your daily training from a young age on after your mom decided to put good use to your enhanced abilities and making you learn mixed martial arts. Kirishima was also smashing it, he didn't even break a sweat when most of the people were already giving up. It was a really amusing workout for you, having Kirishima hype you up and cheer you on, providing you with a mental boost, making you obviously return the favor, which turned into you yelling at him to "Man up!" and "Keep going if you want to be a hero!".

The seated toe-touch was the seventh and easiest exercise. You could easily put your head onto your knees and reach for your toes, which gained curious glances from some of the boys. You thought you even heard the weird purple child say something along the lines of "flexible chicks are the best!" but you decided that your subconscious made you imagine that thirsty comment just so you wouldn't have to deal with the pervert.

The last exercise of the day was the long-distance run, which you absolutely hated. Cardio is fine but you had more fun training with weights. You are a good runner but the fact that you weren’t allowed to listen to any music was straight-up torture, so you decided to just get this over with as fast as possible. After crossing the finish line you didn't fall to the ground as most of the others did. Your blood was pumping rapidly through your veins and laying down sure sounded heavenly but you had to stretch your muscles and calm them down slowly to avoid injuring them, so you just started to walk around to cool down. You could feel your body dripping in sweat. "Ugh, disgusting" you mumbled pulling on your training uniform, which was sticking to you like a second skin.

After everybody had finished their run, you all gathered around your teacher. You could see the exhaustion in some of your classmate's faces, some of them looked really tense and scared and some of the others were smiling proudly, a few people had an unreadable expression plastered over their faces, which you just wrote off as an unimpressed look.

"Alright, time to give you your results. I have ranked you from best to worst. You should probably have a good idea of your standing already. I will just pull up the whole list, it’s not worth it going over each individual score." and with the press of a button, a ranking list appeared out of thin air. 

You noticed that Bakugou wasn't first place like he was in the entrance exam but you also didn’t hold up to your title. Still, you were pretty proud of ranking on place number 11, right after Pink-cheeks. You immediately looked for the name at the bottom of the score, for the one who had to go home and it hurt you to see that it was indeed Midoriya, one of the people you actually got to know a little.

"And I was lying. No one is going home." Aizawa offhandedly commented, making nearly everyone's eyes pop out of their sockets.

"That was just a rational deception to make sure you give your all during the tests," he added with a mischievous smile, gaining screams from the people he had fooled.

"I am surprised the rest of you didn't figure that out. I guess I probably should have said something" a girl mumbled thoughtfully, gaining the annoyed and pissed off stares of all the people who feared get cut today.

"That was pretty nerve-wracking huh?" the boy from before, Sero; you thought was his name, said to Kirishima.

"Naah, I am always down for a challenge!" Kirishima said confidently clenching his fist, he actually made it pretty high on the ranking, he was placed 8th on the list right before your friend Ashido who ranked 9th.

"That's it, we’re done for today. Pick up a syllabus in the classroom, read it over before tomorrow morning." Aizawa said, waving you off and ending your very first day at U.A.

<-- previous Chapter | next Chapter -->

#bakugou #bakugou katsuki #katsuki #bakugou x reader #bakugou katsuki x reader #katsuki x reader #bakugou imagine #katsuki imagine #bnha #bnha imagines #bnha bakugou #bnha fanfiction #bnha fanfic #boko no hero academia #my hero academia #mha bakugou #mha #mha fanfiction #mha imagine #female reader #bakugou fanfic #bakugou fanfiction #kiss and run #bnha x reader #mha x reader #katsuki bakugou x reader #boku no hero academia #boku no hero #boku no hero fanfic #boku no hero academia x reader

[doseofheroes]

Stalling

Summary: When Bucky is injured in the woods, he comes across a small cabin.

Words: 4072 (wtf)

Pair: bucky x reader

Warnings: violence, swearing

A/n: it is literally my first time writing anything besides a paper for school so sorry for how terrible it is but I had the idea and wanted to try! Also learnt the hard way about formatting so hopefully its somewhat coherent. Also also I wrote it in a night on my phone... Idk if literally anyone will read this but im kinda happy with how it turned out so enjoy!

When you moved out to the middle of nowhere a couple of months ago you knew you were just stalling. After graduating university four quick years later you were no more sure of what you wanted to do now then when you started. So yes, time off to be alone and think for yourself was a stall tactic, but doesn’t mean it was the wrong move right?

The first couple of weeks were peaceful. You were in a small cabin you rented off airbnb located somewhere on the outer edge of the ** forest. Snow fell as slowly creating a fresh layer as you sat inside cozied up with a blanket and some tea reading by the fire. A clichè but still nice.

You made yourself some pasta for dinner and listened to some old Amy Whinehouse tunes. Cleaning up the dishes you decided to call it an early night and went to bed. Little did you know what or rather who would show up at your door that night.

==============================

Bucky and Natasha had set out on mission to the depths of the ** forest where a known hydra base was located. Their job was to only collect intel for now so they could make a proper plan and bring back the group for execution. The base had turned out to be much larger than they had anticipated counting over 250 hydra agents working on the base so far.

“How the hell are we just getting wind of this now?” Bucky stared at the base in confusion.

“Somethings not right. We should’ve heard about this one when we took out the others.” Nat said sharing a concerned look with Bucky.

“We shouldn’t go any further until we get the others” Nat said as she started to pack up.

“We need to figure out what the deal is here” Bucky started “we can’t leave yet.”

“Bucky, there are 250 of them and 2 of us. I know we’re a little above average but thats a bit overkill. No pun intended.”

Bucky smirked at her attempt at humour but there was no way he was leaving just yet. He felt something was off and he wanted to know what. “I’ll do a quick look around. In and out. No contact”

“Bucky, no. Dont be stupid. I get it, but lets not do something we’ll regret. I’m calling this in, i’ll let them know were heading back.”

Bucky sits silently for a second and notices she’s looking for his agreement. He nods.

As Nat trails back to get a signal Bucky turns back to look at the base. “What are you up to...” he says to himself as he looks around. Thats when he sees it. The ever so familiar blue liquid. Fuck he thinks to himself. Theyre trying again...more super soldiers...more....me. His mind flashes back to his hydra days and all the stuff they made him do. This can’t happen.

Against all better judgement he looks back at Nat who is still facing away and starts to descend down the rocks towards the base. He just needs to get the suitcase filled with the serum and get out.

Reaching the outer gates he looks around to make his plan. Thats when all hell brakes loose. A guard patrolling the fence line spots him and starts to yell. Bucky runs over to take him out before anyone notices but it’s too late. Next thing he knows hes taking on an army of hydra agents, shots flying. Nat hears the commotion and turns around. “I don’t believe this.” She says into her comms. She’s about to start the descent when she realizes its too late. Bucky’s down. They’ve got him. This just became a rescue mission.

==============================

Bucky slowly comes to and tries to rub his face but soon realizes he is restrained. Taking in his surroundings he tries not to let panic set in as he looks around the room of the hydra base. Everyone is silently staring at him now that he’s awake. One of the men mutters something to a nurse and she leaves the room. The door bursts open a minute later and in comes a tall thin man with a lab coat. “Hello Mr Barnes. This is a pleasant surprise.” Bucky says nothing but gives the man a blank stare. “I see, the strong but silent type. Well your timing is opportune for us Mr Barnes. you see, we are finally creating our own little army of, well, you to be blunt, and I think you can give me the answers to the questions that remain.” Bucky stays silent not letting his panic show. The doctor doesn’t say much more telling the nurses to start the work up. They start collecting blood samples.

Bucky knows he doesn’t have long before this gets real bad so he starts to form his escape plan in his head. The restraints do not feel like they will be too difficult to break out of, its the building he is unsure of, having been unconscious when they brought him in. I guess we’re gonna wing it he thinks to himself.

Once the nurses clear and all the guards leave except the two at the door, Bucky knows its time. He breaks out of the restraints easily, as he suspected. He knocks on the door and the two guards turn around, eyes widening with realization. They start yelling as he bursts through the door knocking them both out.

As he makes his way through the building things are getting worse and worse. Thats when he sees the doctor, face not of fear, but perhaps interest? Bucky keeps making his way out when he sees a guy blocking the door. He takes a good look at him and he realizes. Shit. This is no regular soldier.

He starts swinging and while he is holding his own, he is still taking quite the beating. I just have to get out he thinks. The soldier now has a rifle. great. Using his arm to deflect the shots he runs full force to take him down but takes a hit in his side. Bucky grunts as the shot stings but the soldier pulls out a knife and Bucky rolls in a near miss.

Ducking and dodging Bucky reminds himself he’s not here to fight, he just needs to get out. He turns and makes a run for it, and is almost home free when he feels a sharp pain in his shoulder and is knocked down. He turns his head to see the knife sticking out of his back. Pulling it out slowly Bucky cringes at the pain but the soldier is already walking back to him.

A knife fight ensues as Bucky desperately tries to stave him off. A realization comes to Bucky. I gotta take the hit to leave. Bucky slows his movements and he feels the knife go straight into his chest. Screaming in pain bucky pulls out the knife almost regretting that, but now, with both knives in his hand he is able to make a run for it throwing the final two knives hitting the soldier twice as he makes his escape.

==============================

Bucky is out of breath and losing feeling as his body tries to recover from the two stab wounds and the shot. He needs to find a safe place to get the bullet out.

After wandering for a few miles Bucky smells smoke. That’s when he sees it. A house...out here? He checks the perimeter for any signs of hyrda or that someone is living there. There is a car in the driveway but no signs point to hydra. He takes the risk and starts to bang on the door.

What the fuck? You think to yourself as you slowly wake up to a loud noise. Fear sets in when you realize someone is banging on your door. You sit in bed waiting for a few minutes hoping they will go away. When the knocking doesn’t subside you decide to go down and check out who it is. God this is stupid, you’ve seen horror movies y/n!!

You look through the doors peephole and thats when you see him. Its dark out so you can’t make out much but you can tell he is handsome. Really y/n? A stranger is knocking on your door in the middle of nowhere at 2 am and you think ‘ooh he’s handsome’?! You mentally scold yourself. Thats when you notice he is clutching his chest.

“Please. I know you’re there. I can hear you. I just need some help and I will leave. I mean you no harm” please for the love of god let me in Bucky thinks to himself.

You are terrified but he looks really hurt. This is a bad idea...you think to yourself but unlock the door anyway.

Bucky perks up at the noise and the door opens slowly. Buckys eyes look up to you and he stares for a second. “Can I come in, please?” He says softly.

“Oh yes sorry!” You say as you let him in, adrenaline rushing. He walks inside slowly looking around before heading to the kitchen. You go to turn on the lights and flick them on before he has time to yell “Dont!” But its too late. You gasp as you take in his injuries and blood soaked clothes.

You look up to his face. “Please, turn them off” he says firmly but quietly. You do as he says. He has the most beautiful blue eyes you think before being kicked back to reality.

“Are you- are you o-okay?” You ask voice shaky. He stays silent. “Well you’re obviously not okay...but do you need...how can I help you? Should I call the police? You should really-“

“Im fine, no need to call anyone” he says cutting you off. “Do you have a towel or something?” You sit there frozen for a few seconds before you spring into action. You disappear upstairs for a few minutes. Bucky takes a deep breath after you leave trying to reorganize his thoughts. The moment he saw your face he forgot, even just for a moment, why he was there in the first place. You had such a calming presence even though you were clearly panicked. You came back arms full with anything you thought could be remotely useful. First aid kit, towels, and a sewing kit you didn’t know you had until now among other things. As you head back to the kitchen you almost drop everything as the man stands shirtless in front of you. You regain composure placing everything on the counter pretending not to see the man smirk.

“I’m going to need you to take the bullet out.” He deadpans. “What?!” You choke out almost laughing at the thought. “I can’t reach it with my other injuries....” he trails off seeing the panicked look on your face “you know what don’t worry about it I think I can manage” A wave of relief floods over you at his words but as he goes to sit you see him wince and you know he was lying for your benefit. Be strong y/n you can do this, you are a strong independent woman “ I can do it. I can take it out. You’re clearly not okay.” Bucky is about to protest but stops when he feels another wave of pain. He nods at you and sterilizes the tweezers before handing them to you. You grab them reluctantly but give him a small smile. He doesn’t know why but that small action gives him enough comfort he thinks he might just be ok. “Okay here goes nothing” you say as he exhale deeply and stick the tweezers in. Bucky grips the counter top and groans. “Im so sorry!” You quickly retreat from your real life game of operation. “No I’m fine keep going” he says and gives you a reassuring smile. “So..” you try to think of some conversation to keep his mind elsewhere. “Do you like cats?” Oh my god bitch are you for real, you are gonna die alone. You clear your throat awkwardly, too late to back out of this conversation. He cracks a smile at your clear embarrassment but answers your question. “Um Ive never had one but I dont mind them I guess. More of a dog person I think” she nods. “Are you...a cat person?” Yikes this is awkward Bucky thinks to himself. But he kind of likes awkward with you. “ Im in animal person in general. Love them all.” You say half focused on the conversation half focused on his side. You try not to let your eyes wander to his abs...and that chest.. ugh is this a man or a god and thats when you realized you had stopped moving and he was staring at you....staring at him. Your eyes quickly dart away and your face heats up at being so blatantly caught enjoying the view. He chuckles and you quickly change the subject. “So care to explain any of this or are you just going to bleed all over my kitchen?” You say almost defensively trying to hide your embarrassment. Bucky stiffens a little. “Are you going to find the bullet or just stare at me all night?” He says half joking, avoiding the question. “I think” you say before grabbing onto the bullet finally and pulling it out quickly. Bucky winces. “that you are avoiding the question” you finish. “You know me so well already!” He states pouring some alcohol over the wound, wincing again. “Here. Stay still.” You say ready to stitch it up. “You’ve really accepted the nurse role” he says smirking “I appreciate it.” He finished more seriously. You smile back. God he loved that smile. Get yourself together barnes, it’s just a pretty girl. “Wait you’re not actually a nurse are you?” He asks suspiciously.You laugh at the accusation. “No. I’m nothing.” Wow way to spill all you life problems in one depressing sentence y/n!! Ughhh why can’t I talk to men. Well when they look this good...”What do you mean?” He asks ignoring the pain of your amateur stitches. Definitely not a nurse...“I just meant I haven’t decided what I am going to do, or be yet...thats all” you give him a weak smile and he nods in understanding. “You want me to do the others?” You point to his stab wounds. casual. “Uh sure, if you dont mind. Thanks” You nod again and begin working. You sit in silence for a bit before something occurs to Bucky. He didn’t kill that solider...they’ll be looking for him...and he may have led them right here to you. You feel Bucky tense and he begins to look around. “Whats wrong?” You ask suddenly nervous again. Wait when did you stop being nervous? “Nothing” he said quickly. “Well sit still im almost done” you say and he nods. You finish the last stitch and sit up.

“There all done! I cannot believe I just did that” You begin to smile but it quickly fades as Bucky immediately stands up and puts his shirt back on. A confused look grows on your face which quickly turns to fear as Bucky starts pulling out your kitchen knives and shoving them in his belt. He grabs your hand and starts to drag you upstairs “come with me”. You follow.

Once upstairs he looks around before opening the closet door. “Uhhh what are you doing” you say ignoring the feeling you get when he grabs your hips and moves you into the closet. “They must have followed me. Stay in here and don’t make a noise. Dont leave until I come get you.” You stare at him waiting for your brain to catch up. “Do you understand? Not a word.” You nod slowly. “You will be okay. I won’t let anyone hurt you I promise.” He turns to leave then pauses. “Im Bucky by the way.” “Y/n” you reply weakly. With that he smiles then closes the door and you hear his footsteps walk back downstairs. You sit in silence the only noise being your heavy breaths for a few minutes before you hear glass smash. Bucky takes in his surroundings, five agents, all heavily armed but no super solider. That can’t be good. He takes them down one by one with ease mentally apologizing for everything he’s breaking in your home. Once the last agent is down he steps outside and listens for more. He can hear them every so slightly which means they can’t be more than a mile away. He needs to get you out of there, you’re sitting ducks.

He runs back inside and grabs your car keys before heading upstairs to retrieve you. He swings open the closet door and you let out a scream and start kicking. “Hey hey its me!” You look up and realize your safe. “Sorry...wh-what happened?” “We need to leave. I got your keys, leave everything here, stay behind me” You get up slowly and nod sticking closely behind him. He walks slowly and quietly down the stairs then pauses. Oh fu- Buckys thoughts get cut off as he ducks to avoid the super soldiers hand swinging at his head. Ho. Ly. Shit. You think watching Bucky expertly fight what looks like a man but appears to have the strength of an elephant. You hide behind a wall peering around to watch when it hits you. Super strong men...bullets...bucky...im in an airbnb with the winter soldier. The realization hits you like a truck and you turn around stunned. You catch your breath and begin to watch again. Fear settles in all over when you see the soldier choking the life out of Bucky. Without thinking you grab a knife from the floor run over and stab him in the back. The soldier loosens his grip just enough for Bucky to break free and snaps the guys neck before he has a chance to grab you. “Thanks...” he huffs out holding his neck “we have to move” He grabs your arm and takes you out to the car. You both get inside and Bucky just starts driving.

==============================

The drive is mostly silence as you try and process what is happening and Bucky tries to figure out what to say. “You don’t have a phone on you do you?” He asks. “No..uh you told me not to grab anything” “Right” More silence. I have to say something Bucky decides. “I’m sorry for dragging you into this. I wasn’t thinking straight and I-“ “You’re the winter soldier aren’t you?” You cut him off. Oh god. Bucky thought this couldn’t get worse, she called me the winter soldier, shes afraid. “I am- or was” He doesn’t know how else to say it without going off. You sit there for a minute in silence. “Ok” is all you say. Bucky looks at you in surprise. “Ok?” “Yeah, ok” you repeat. With that you shift in your seat and nod off. Ok...Bucky repeats this over and over in his head as he drives back to the compound.

==============================

“So..they’re going to be angry with me...just as a heads up.” Bucky says to you as you arrive at the compound. “What? Aren’t you the one who is injured and missing?” “Well, yes, but it’s my fault. I was reckless and I put everyone in danger. Including you. Im sorry.” Bucky suddenly felt even more guilty in remembering that you were now dragged into this too. “It’s okay, honestly, I’m just glad your okay” you said with a smile. It was true. Yes, you were scared shitless at the time but you’re not going to pretend you weren’t psyched to have met Bucky and soon the avengers! Plus..you were going stir crazy in that cabin... oh the cabin...there goes my deposit. Bucky smiled back and got out of the car. You followed him all the way through the front doors to the elevator and down the hall admiring the building around you. This is a Stark building all right...

Bucky slowed and you could hear the avengers in on the other side of the door discussing. He steps inside and stops. “Hey guys” they all whip their heads around to stare at Bucky. Smooth. “ARE YOU KIDDING ME? YOU IDIOT!” You hear a female voice. They all proceed to start yelling at him over one another. “Guys....guys...GUYS” Bucky yells finally prompting them to stop. He steps aside and you figure thats your cue so you enter the room. “Hello” you say awkwardly waving to everyone. They all stare at you then back at him. “Who is this?” Tony friggen stark asks Bucky. “When I escaped i was injured and I came across her house. She stitched me up but they followed me so we took her car and well... here we are!” “Buck, we went in to get you and you weren’t there. What happened?” Oh my goddddd captain america!!!! Neutral face y/n, neutral face, be cool. “I broke out about 30 minutes after I was...taken in... but they had a super soldier of their own. Barely got out of there with a bullet hole and two stab wounds.” Bucky says nonchalantly. Your eyes widen at the implications of his story. For some reason your brain forgot something happened before he showed up at your door. Dude was shot and stabbed twice! What the fuck! “And you coincidentally live up in a cabin in the woods alone near a hydra base?” Tony says to you receiving a glare from Bucky. “Wha- hydra base?- no, I rented that cabin, its an airbnb, I was just staying there for a few months” you say, looking around for confirmation that they believe you. They look at each other skeptically. “She stabbed the super soldier to save me- do I really have to say this?” Bucky tries to defend you. “Hey, look, I should just go home, I don’t mean to cause any trouble” you say suddenly feeling how tired you were. “I’m sorry, but they might have seen you, I can’t let you go home until this is cleared up.” Bucky says sympathetically. Your eyes widen at this statement. You look around at the other faces and your fears are confirmed. “He’s right. We need to figure out what their plan is...and no offence..but who you are.” Steve says earning another glare from bucky. You think about this for a moment. I guess I would be skeptical too... plus staying here wouldn’t be so bad...“Alright. Fair enough.” You say shrugging. Buckys face looks surprised but then relieved. In fact they all look relieved.“Well all right sergeant, show the lady to her room” Tony says grinning at Bucky. With that you follow Bucky through the building.

==============================

When you and Bucky finally reach your new room you can tell he wants to say something. “Im so so-“ “thanks f-“ You both speak at the same time. “You first” you say, giggling.Buckys heart clenches at the sound. ”Look, im just really sorry about all of this, I don’t know how to make it up to you.” You can see the guilt on his face. You want to wipe it away with your hands..mouth... god y/n, you sad little daydreamer. “Really truly, its okay. If it were to be anyone I’m glad its me, I was literally in the middle of doing nothing” you say laughing. “But I know how you can make it up to me” you say smiling. “How, anything” he says, face lighting up, not letting his mind go to the places her statement suggested. My first choice would be to for you to push me up against this door and make out with me buuuut... “give me a tour of this place tomorrow?” You say, the confidence of your subconscious not quite reaching your mouth. “Deal” he says nodding. His eyes linger over you for too long before he notices you stifling a yawn. “Sorry, youve had a long night, I’ll let you sleep. See you tomorrow.” “Tomorrow” you say smiling as he leaves the room. Left alone in this strange place, your thoughts swirl on only one thing, or should you say only one man.

=================================

To be continued?

Comments appreciated :)

#bucky x reader #bucky barnes #mcu #bucky barnes x reader #bucky fic #fanfic #i dont know #fanfiction #winter soldier x reader #marvel

[rejectedusername-trashfics]

Madness is Contagious: Chapter 3- My Talk With Hilda

Summary: After the Mad King is put back in jail, one of two his nieces is appointed CEO of Monarch Labs. The niece seems disinterested in the company, but in keen on figuring out how to cure her uncle’s madness. His other niece wants to keep the madness alive. After an attempt at a cure goes aerie, the madness is transferred to Vav. X-Ray ends up getting captured along with the new CEO niece. Will Hilda, Rusty, and the sane King be able to make things go back to normal? 

Chapter:3/10

Word Count: 1,319

First / Previous / Next / AO3

About a week had passed since Poppy had stepped up as CEO of Monarch Labs, but not much had changed within that week. X-Ray and Vav still fought crime in the city just as they normally would. Hilda also worked on her inventions just as she normally would. The only difference at all was that Poppy requested that one of her special potted plants be placed in every room off the building.

Hilda didn’t trust the plants and Vav encouraged her to investigate. After tests were run on the plant, it was shown that there was nothing inherently dangerous about the plants; no poison, no thorns, nothing. Afterwards, Hilda begrudgingly allowed the plant to stay in her lab because it was the boss’s order.

After a while, Hilda started to attempt to work on upgrades for the two heroes. One afternoon, she was working when Poppy came into her lab. ORF zoomed over to greet her. “Greetings. How are you functioning, today?” ORF asked.

Poppy patted ORF, “I’m doing well.” Hilda looked up from her work to see Poppy was dressed more casually today, wearing jeans, a t-shirt, and a hoodie tied around her waist. “Hilda,” she called out to greet as she began to walk over to Hilda’s station. “I was wondering what you were working on.”

Hilda quickly shuffled to cover up her work. “Like hell I’m telling you.”

Poppy tilted her head to the side. “Why not? I gave you creative freedom so I could see your work flourish. So, I kinda want to know what I’m letting you create.”

“Psh. You’re just gonna find a way to use it against X-Ray and Vav.”

“Why would I do that?”

“Because you’re mad. Just like your uncle.”

Poppy sighed. “I already told you, I don’t like the madness. I would say X-Ray and Vav could use a few upgrades, but that has nothing to do with me.”

As if on cue, X-Ray entered Hilda’s lab. “Yo, you finally working on those upgrades?” he asked.

“Maybe.” Hilda growled, annoyed.

“And Helllllllloooo, Miss Flower,” he greeted Poppy.

Poppy rolled her eyes and gave X-Ray a short wave. “What are you doing here?” she asked.

“I wanted to check on upgrades. I also admit I wanted to see something pretty hot.”

“Why aren’t you here with Vav?”

“I told Vav he had something more important to do. Why? Would you really rather see him more than me?”

Poppy shrugged. “Not really. I just thought you two did things together.”

“Nah, baby. My mission here needed to be a solo one,” he flirted.

Poppy face palmed and sighed. Then turned her attention back too Hilda. “Look, if you have any questions of me, I’ll answer them honestly.” Poppy added.

“Alright fine. These plants tested to be relatively harmless. What are they and why did you put one in EVERY room in the building?” Hilda asked, first.

“Oh,” Poppy clapped, happily. “I bred them. I mixed oak for strength, hyacinth for vines, and well poppies, for flare” she gestured to the red flowers then herself, “and, well, namesake.”

“I thought that were roses,” X-Ray pointed out and Poppy shivered in disgust.

“And why do you have them everywhere?” Hilda asked again.

“It’s a, well, precautionary protection measure.”

“How can harmless plants like that protect us?”

“I’m pretty sure us heroes can be all the protection you need,” X-Ray added.

Poppy sighed. “Look, when I was young I was given a gift. I decided to study botany to I could learn how to use my gift to its full potential so I would never have to be a damsel in distress. And hopefully you never have to see me use that gift.”

“You are very weird,”

“A hot weird,” X-Ray interrupted to flirt.

“But we will not let you conquer us with whatever that gift is.” Hilda finished.

“I know you keep thinking I have the same madness as my uncle. But the one with the madness is my twin sister,” Poppy tried to reason.

“You’re twin sister?” Hilda asked in disbelief.

“Yeah.” Poppy started. “Ever since we were kids, she always wanted to grow up and be just like our uncle, wanting to be like his assistant or protégé or something. And when the madness was created, she and my uncle were both struck with it,” she explained.

“Struck with it? Do you really expect me to believe you have an ‘evil twin’ and it’s not multiple personality disorder?”

Poppy answered by pulling up a photo on her phone. X-Ray came over to look as well. the photo was of three little kids, two identical looking girls, one with a side ponytail and on her side and one with a braid, linked shoulders with a little boy in the middle. “I’m the one with the side pony tail,” she explained.

“Okay, so you do have a sister then.” Poppy nodded. “’Who’s the boy?”

“Childhood friend.”

“Turned boyfriend?” X-Ray asked sadly.

Poppy made a face in disgust. “Ew, no!”

“So, you ARE single?” he asked hopefully. Poppy rolled her eyes in response.

Hilda sighed. “So, I guess this all DOES sound pretty real.”

“I guess this means hot evil female villain this time,” X-Ray stated, glumly.

“And I know I said I didn’t have a plan or anything, but actually I do. It’s not evil, so I’ll be completely upfront about it.” Hilda motioned for her to continue, “so, I know I said my field of expertise was botany, but I want to create a ray gun that can restore sanity. I’d test it on my uncle then cure my sister. Then the only conflict that the two of us will have to deal with is sibling rivalry,” she finished.

Hilda shook her head. “Okay, so you are crazy. Just not the crazy I was anticipating.”

Poppy smiled and shrugged. “I can’t help that part.”

X-Ray thought of something else and lifted his head up. “Hey, Poppy,” Poppy turned to face X-Ray. “You got all uncomfortable when I said something about roses.” Poppy shuttered slightly when roses were mentioned. “Do you not like those? Cause they’re like, my favorite flower.”

“I don’t hate them, but I’m not their biggest fan right now. It’s a long story that I’m not ready to share quite yet.”

Outside of Monarch Labs, day became night. Everything was almost normal but after the sun set, there was a familiar occurrence at the City Mental Institution. Break in alarms started blaring across the sound system. A familiar prisoner sat up on his cot. “Well, that is a familiar tone,” he noted.

He got up off of his cot and calmly walked over to the glass wall dividing him and the rest of the world, patiently waiting for whomever was breaking him out. After a minute, the door to his cell sung open. A girl who looked exactly like Poppy was standing there, only difference being that she had long dark blonde hair, wearing a tight jump suit and her hair was pulled back into a bun. “Subtlety and covertness do not seem to be your forte,” he told the girl.

“Getting you out of here was vastly more important that subtlety and covertness,” the girl responded.

The prisoner sighed and smiled. “It’s good to see you again, Pop,” the man cut himself off when he saw the girl narrowing her eyes. “I mean, Rose.”

Rose smiled. “Good to see you again too, Uncle,” she replied as took out her own ray gun. She shot at the glass, destroying it.

The prisoner stepped out of what used to be his cell and stretched his arms. “God, that this was just as cramped as last time.

Then Rose offered her hand out to the prisoner. “Come on. The city needs its Mad King back. And he will have his terrifying help alongside him, this time. His terrifyingly evil assistant, the Mad Princess.”

#madness is contagious #xray and vav #fanfic #rt fanfic

[tumblunni]

For no reason out of nowhere, I’m gonna ramble headcanons/how to combine the dub and sub into a better dub ideas for the second digimon movie, Hurricane Touchdown! Aka the one that was awkwardly stitched on as part of the first movie in english, aka ‘that one where lopmon is fuckin terrifying and also american’ (oh and I know its a nitpick, but to me it makes sense to call it the second movie instead of the third?? the greymon/parrotmon fight bit wasnt a ‘movie’, it was the pilot episode for Adventure in japan. its more like an ova I think, but i dunno if the company ever gave it an official status in the movie listings...)

ANYWAY WHATEVER WHERE WAS I oh yeah Bunni Really Liked This Dumb Movie And Wished It Was Its Own Season And Kinda Wants To Make A Dumb Rpgmaker Game Of It So, ideas!

* Well... couldnt it have worked as its own season...? One of the only flaws I can agree was a significant problem was that ‘willis steals the spotlight’, tho i dont really think thats totally bad since I liked him a lot more than the 02 protagonists. But yeah, honestly you could kinda have the same movie if all the 02 characters were written out, or if Willis met with literally any group of digidestined from any series, or even completely new ones. The dub made it worse by writing out all of the scenes with the Adventure digidestined, thus writing out the 02 kids’s entire motivation for the whole plot :P And i think honestly this plot could have been a whole season if it was stretched out, and if it had original characters replacing the 02 ones. It would be unique and odd to have our protagonist be a super loner sassy asshole tamer who outright refuses to team up with anyone, fearing they’d just get vanished away by this giant terrifying digimon that’s stalking him. If the backstory was revealed slowly throughout the season it could be a very good mystery to keep us all hooked! And if there were more scenes about the other kids breaking past willis’s shell and becoming a team, rather than just ‘davis cries a joke, suddenly everything is over’. plus there’d naturally be stuff to pad out the season length if we had to be introduced to these characters and give them all their own amount of screentime and development. Or, seriously, if this was just like... a longer movie, or a mini season like Tri... Maybe we could have had the 02 kids in it and not had them feel overshadowed and useless? Maybe everyone aside from Davis could get some screentime too :P

* Maybe it could be an excuse to show off all the armor and jogress digivolutions that this series canonically has yet never used? I think it was budget constraints or not enough time in the season or something, but there was a HUGE amount of unused designs for every potential combination of crests! And all they ever got was to be trading cards and occasionally enemies in miscellanous videogames. (Oh and Lynxmon got to be an enemy in Tamers and Frontier, probably cos its the one that looks coolest animated lol!) Oh and it was odd how Cyber Sleuth seemed to retcon some previously-unrelated digimon into the Imperialdramon of Silphymon. Now Valkyrmon is something Silphymon can digivolve into, and shares the same character model even. Odd! But man it would be cool if it did get officially added to the 02 version of the evo line!

* Potential for giving Yolei and Cody a bigger plot role in the whole thing, maybe Yolei is trying to research into the mystery digimon cos she’s the computer expert? they almost never let her actually do computer stuff compared to how much izzy got to do in the first season :P It could also help thread the plot together a bit! Like, have various scenes of the different kids finding out that the Adventure kids have gone missing in different ways- Yolei could be freaking out cos she cant contact izzy, maybe Cody had a study session with joe and arrived to find his entire house empty.  And maybe have a lil plot of Yolei being like ‘oh god how can we do this without izzy’ and being able to prove herself and gain confidence instead of just living in his shadow. Also she’d just be useful in finding out stuff about mysterious dissappearances that happened in the past, via the internet, and maybe the gang could encounter willis in less of an accidental way and more like they were actively trying to track down wendigomon and THEN bump into him by accident? I dunno, just make them actually DO more. Do more to save their own damn friends. Not just the willis and davis road trip show where davis only exists to tell willis how to do various digivolution stuff :P

* I feel bad that my brain kinda defaults to calling him Willis, even though I still have no clue why they changed it from Wallace. ‘Hey this american name could be a different american name!’ I think its just stuck in my head cos i watched the dub version so much... So lol I dunno, smash them both into canon! Make him wallace but kokomon calls him willis since they’re this child-minded monster thing. (Could also keep calling terriermon gummymon and maybe even mistake the 02 kids for various people wallace used to know as a kid?)

* Dub-added stuff to keep and to toss out! I like the idea of Willis being the person izzy talked to on the internet in the previous movie. I dont like the idea that he somehow created diaboromon! You could write that out and still keep the scene, maybe even still have willis saying ‘its all my fault’ because he’s just recently lost his digimon partner to a mysterious virus and he thinks maybe the same thing is happening here/that kokomon is causing the chaos rather than diaboromon. Oh, and I like the idea of it being stated to be a virus corrupting a digimon, rather than just being... never explained wtf happened. A virus that’s the remnants of diaboromon would even make sense, though the continuity order in the dub kinda makes it impossible. (SO MANY PLOT HOLES lol)

* PLAYABLE FLASHBACKS YO and/or maybe an omake type epilogue thing after the ending like srsly give us a chance to play as willis with both his digimon and how not dead and not evil they are An epilogue would be good as a way to add some more fanon-y headcanons and ideas for what happened after kokomon came back. (or if he even did) I feel like a lot of people complain that the dub ‘changed too much’ by confirming that kokomon came back, and that somehow a happy ending is worse than an ambiguous bittersweet one. Which we didnt even have in the first place cos we saw kokomon’s digiegg in the sub anyway, even if we didnt see it hatching. BUT ANYWAY My idea for keeping that bittersweet element even if we have Happy Kokomon Is Alive Time! Its.... the dub! Or rather taking literally something that was actually just a shameless footage-chopping lazyness XD Cos the dub just showed kokomon in endigomon form in the added scene where he totally came back. Making it rather obvious even to kid-bunni that it was a dub edit, lol! BUT WHAT IF THAT! What if the bittersweet aspect is that kokomon is forever changed by the whole experience? Still having aftereffects of being corrupted, even though he isnt evil anymore. So his evolution line is still a super scary virusized one and he’s stuck unable to de-digivolve from champion level. So we could have funny/cute/sad scenes of Willis trying to live with this very large very destructive digimon, kinda like that one episode of tamers. How do I hide a seven foot tall cyborg rabbit man from my mom?? And it could also be bittersweet because kokomon’s spent so long frozen at the time when he was taken away, and now he has to cope with his two best friends having grown up without him. He’s still this childlike personality stuck in a scary body, even if he’s not dangerous anymore. And it could be very stressful for everyone involved, but also heartwarming! I mean imagine giant scary kokomon being all shy and holding his tiny big brother’s hand while crossing the street! Imagine him hugging willis and squishing him! XD So it could just be a short epilogue episode of willis and partners fighting some sort of villain of the week, and showing slice-of-life antics with them. Just establishing that their problems arent all over yet, but also that they’ll probably be strong enough to deal with it, after all they’ve managed to survive so far. And maybe some cute mini scenes of them still keeping in touch with the 02 kids as pen pals! And maybe even something like an emotional scene of willis finally introducing his digimon partners to his parents, after failing at keeping them secret? Itd be nice to see his parents tbh, i always wondered what they were like! (or does he have a single mother? since he was only talking about her during the movie)

* Random but: personality headcanons for terriermon and lopmon/kokomon! We honestly dont really get much of a personality for terriermon in this movie, he just seems like a sort of generic nice cute partner compared to the Tamers terriermon’s snarky personality. And, naturally, we dont really learn anything about kokomon’s real personality, considering the circumstances :P So! Headcanons! I always headcanoned kokomon as being a really sweet, kind and shy lil babbu before all this tragedy happened. Someone who always relied on his brother and his human friend, so being separated from them hit him extra hard. I feel like if terriermon was the one who was infected he would have had his eldritch horror take a very different form, whatever the virus is its something that feeds on the personal anxieties of the digimon it infected. Also, yeah, it’d just be cuter this way in my hypothetical epilogue fanfic ideas! Scaredy-cat wendigomon!! :3 And I kinda feel that maybe terriermon could stand out more from tamers-terriermon if he wasnt just the more level-headed equivelant, but if he was MORE OF THAT! Like... a more grumpy loner matt-type personality. After all the tragedy that happened to him ans willis he’s become quite toughened and determined to protect his tamer even though he’s too small to make an impact against his giant infected brother. And maybe like how willis has stopped having human friends, terriermon has become more cold too, and they could perhaps have more conflicts together because of it? And like.. the reason terriermon never digivolved to champion could be because of this rift between them, rather than just ‘literally the only reason the 02 kids are here is so that they can tell willis how to use his digivice’. Like seriously HOW DID GUMMYMON DIGIVOLVE TO TERRIERMON THEN?? Plus it’d just have more dynamic to their friendship and flesh the story out more. It could prove how absolutely fire-forged their friendship is, that these two grumpy sassmasters that even sass at each other still care so deeply even if they suck at showing it. Also the idea of a badass tiny terriermon is just aweome to me. Imagine him with a cape flowing in the wind, and sunglasses at night, and then imagine someone who feels like that even when theyre not wearing them. Thats how movie-terriermon always felt to me during the scenes of him fighting wendigomon! And I cheered a whole load at him digivolving and being able to fight toe-to-toe with wendigomon in the BEST FIGHT SCENE IN THE SERIES with the running up walls and GUN PUNCH TO THE FACE and just EVERYTHINGGGG the animation in this movie was too strong

* have i mentioned that i love this movie

* a lot

#i dunno what to tag this as so i can find it later #dumb digimon thing #there you go

[movietvtechgeeks]

Latest story from https://movietvtechgeeks.com/battlestar-galactica-supernaturals-tahmoh-penikett-innovative-new-series-deep-six/

'Battlestar Galactica,' 'Supernatural's' Tahmoh Penikett talks up innovative new series 'Deep Six'

It’s been a while since I had the pleasure of chatting with Tahmoh Penikett, who memorably played Ezekiel/Gadreel on Supernatural a few seasons ago. Tahmoh just finished shooting on a new digital sci-fi adventure series called Deep Six, which caught my attention as a unique and exciting project. Deep Six is a digital sci-fi adventure series that follows a group of astronauts and their military escort on the first deep space mission. They find themselves stranded after an unanticipated accident, and – wouldn’t you know it – also confronted with a first encounter that may not be very friendly. What makes the series unusual is its focus on realism – the creator is a scientist, and the show has two real life experts as consultants, including a professor of astrophysics and a space historian. With their help, Deep Six aims to portray space in all its beauty and majesty as well as its terrifying silence and endless expanse. Much as sci-fi classics like 2001 and Alien anchored their stories in realism and thus amped up the terror, Deep Six aims to be both accurate and scary. Sign me up! I caught up with Tahmoh today after a week of our schedules absolutely refusing to mesh and me coming down with a truly horrifying cold. But we persevered! You can read our other interview with Tahmoh Penikett here. [caption id="attachment_42462" align="aligncenter" width="620"] Photos: Fangasm[/caption] Lynn: It’s so nice to talk to you again! We miss you at the Supernatural conventions, by the way. Tahmoh: Yeah it’s been a while, thank you. I miss being there; those things are fun. Lynn: Well Supernatural is going into its 13th season, so who knows, you may be back. Tahmoh: (laughing) With Supernatural, you never know! So true. So what if Gadreel sacrificed himself in a moment of heroism? Death is an impediment to returning to Supernatural. Lynn: I was fascinated by what I’ve heard about Deep Six. Is that one of the things that drew you to this project, the focus on realism? Do you think that will make the series scarier? Tahmoh: I think any time that you have a creator and showrunner who is determined to make something as realistic as possible -- being honest about the risks involved with space travel, where we might be in the future, what limitations we might have, whatever exceptional technologies we may have advanced in – but being real about the dangers of space and how hard space is. And that makes it more plausible for the viewer and the audience. In general, to me, as humans, we’re moving ahead at such an incredible rate in terms of technology, and specifically rocket propulsion and traveling to other planets, and eventually getting to Mars has become a priority again. It wasn’t for about 30 years in terms of the major space agencies in the world, and for NASA, it just was not a priority. Now it’s become a priority again, and we’re seeing the possibilities, and you hear we may be getting there in ten to fifteen years. So it’s really fascinating, but there are inherent risks. And here you have a creator like the ones who created Deep Six, and they’re trying to stay true to that. They’re having scientific advisors, and as a result, they have a show that is much more realistic and much more plausible.  Audiences, in general, are educated about it because we’re watching all the programs, we’re following Elon Musk on twitter, we’re following NASA, we’re seeing all the updates, and we’re seeing what the limitations are. So in general, we’re quite educated about what is really happening. Lynn: That’s sort of what I was thinking. It seems to me the more realism, the more there’s the potential for really being scared, simply because it seems more plausible. I remember seeing 2001 A Space Odyssey – I was a kid and probably too young to actually be watching it, but that’s part of what made it so scary. Tahmoh: Yeah, Battlestar Galactica is a perfect example of a show I was on that had that – there was, of course, some technology we had, we’re doing space travel – but the Battlestar itself, it was classic, it really looked like a military vessel.  It was like a warship. We had the old school phones to communicate. It wasn’t really fancy but a lot of it was science based, we had actual rocket scientists who were consultants on the show, so a lot of the technology had science behind it.  And I think that’s what these guys are trying to do, so that’s good, man. [I’ve said this before, but I love the way Tahmoh talks – he’s clearly so knowledgeable and then he just casually tosses in a ‘man’ or a ‘love, , ’ and it’s just like, OH.] Lynn: Yeah, I totally agree. Did you get to interact with the scientist consultants as a guest act or you were just aware of their influence in the conceptualization of the show? Tahmoh: Yeah, I was just aware of their influence. I got the call, and the timing wasn’t ideal, but my agent said, just look at the script, I’ve heard good things, people have been talking about it, and it’s apparently a really good script. So I read the scene they wanted me to do, and it was literally one full day of work they wanted me to do. And once I read the script, I was like you know, this would be great to do, this is really well written. Better than most web series that I’ve seen done. And it just worked out time-wise, but mostly I wanted to do it because the script was so well done but also the consultants on it. So I went out there, and they were selling me on it as we were trying to make it happen, they were selling me on the project with all the information about how they had consulting scientists, how one of the creators is actually a physicist himself. You know, it definitely leant it some real credibility when you know that people like that are involved, and they’re trying to make something as real as that. Lynn: I’m not surprised at the quality of the script just because they seem to be putting so much heart and so much motivation into the entire project. That probably translates. Did it translate also to the day of filming? It sounds like it was a long day, but was it a set where people were motivated? Like the Supernatural set where every time I’ve been there, everyone seems to work so smoothly and even when things go wrong, everyone seems to go with the flow because they all seem to love what they’re doing? Was this a similar set? Tahmoh: Similar. You know, obviously, it’s hard to compare it with some other aspects, these guys were working with a very limited budget, but it definitely didn’t look like it. They were very efficient, everyone I saw on the crew was very good at their job, and on board and invested. So yeah, I guess they did share those qualities like on Supernatural, and that’s always a good thing. You know a project is good when everyone is really pulling their own because they believe in it, they believe in the story. If you believe in the story, you want to be a part of it and bring your best work, because the end product should be great. And I’m excited to be a part of that. Lynn: Can you tell me anything about your character? Tahmoh: I can’t speak a lot on him, I don’t know how much they’ve released. All I can say is he’s one of the astronauts’ commanding officers, so he’s kind of the veteran. He’s been around the block, and he’s someone who a lot of the other astronauts look up to. And you get a sense of his character right away, who he is, how much experience he has. Then the situation takes a turn for the worst, and that’s the surprising hook of my episode is what they encounter, what sort of problems he faces and how he deals with it.  And he’s obviously a veteran and very capable and smart and a leader and the others respect him. He’s serious, and he’s also got a joking and playful attitude at times, but it’s also, they’re astronauts and there’s no messing around, so when it comes down to business, and the situation gets serious, he’s by the book. Lynn: I’m glad to hear that he gets at least a little opportunity to do a little bit of comedy because I know from your other projects how good you are at that subtle comedy. Tahmoh: Yeah, I don’t, unfortunately, get the opportunity a lot to do it, but whenever I can squeeze it in there, it’s kinda who I am, and I think most of us have that in us, right? Lynn: Right, I totally agree. I know from talking to you at length in the past about your portrayal of Gadreel how thoughtful you are about the characters you’re portraying and creating a backstory so you can find what their motivation is and so you can understand them from a psychological viewpoint. [See my earlier interview with Tahmoh for that discussion here}  When you go in to do something like this, where you have to create a character and their arc in literally one day, is that challenging for someone who likes to really get a handle on the person you’re portraying? Tahmoh: That’s a really good point you just made because it is. Normally if I have two days of preparation, that’s still a very short amount of time. It’s kind of an essential part of my process to write the backstory. This was very very last minute, and I was travelling and there were things going on, so this was so last minute that I literally jumped on a plane after an afternoon of negotiating, flew, time difference, lost three hours, Toronto, out the next morning, shot all day. So I didn’t have the opportunity, I simply couldn’t do the work that I normally would, so I have to trust the script. I communicated to the writers before I arrived and I had a conversation with them where I said, you’re really going to have to lay out for me who this guy is, beyond what’s in the given circumstances and what’s in the script, I need you to tell me who he is and then I’ll work with that as best I can in this short amount of time we have. Lynn: That makes sense. I remember that in our last chat, in the green room at some Supernatural convention, we spent a lot of time talking about your process because as a psychologist, that’s what fascinates me. How actors make sense of their characters and how you bring that through, especially a very complicated character like Gadreel. So that was my first thought, I wonder how he’s doing that because this is a different set of circumstances. Tahmoh: Yeah, that’s very observant of you. Sometimes you just don’t have the opportunity. And I’ve said this before, sometimes you – and it’s rare, unfortunately – but sometimes the script is so good and the character is so good that you connect with the character on such a cerebral and such an instinctual level that you don’t have to make those choices. You CAN and you may, but sometimes you just completely understand that character. Sometimes you understand them so well that you trust in the script 100%, but because I like to do my due diligence, I’ll still –  it just makes it that much easier to color his backstory if I do have the opportunity to write some of it, you know? Lynn: Yeah. Tahmoh: It always helps, because it layers the work and it makes it more real, and you don’t just forget about it. Helo (on Battlestar Galactica) I definitely ended up writing a lot of backstory, but also when I had the audition, I just understood him 100%. I got him. I was like, just let me in the room. I didn’t have to use those techniques that you use to get you in an emotional place, whether it be substitution or sense memory or things like that, it was just there for me. Every once in a while in your career you’re blessed with things like that. Lynn: That must feel really good when it happens. Did you have to do more work with the Gadreel character on Supernatural because it was such an unusual character and had such an unusual evolution? Tahmoh: I had to do some work, but for that – and I’ve told this story before – it threw me off at first when I found out that Jared [Padalecki] was already playing the character. Because he’s one of the leads of the show! So Jared and I were playing the same character, and me not knowing that – I thought that I would be playing Ezekiel or Gadreel first, and then when I found out he had already played him – on the day that I was playing him – that threw me off. Lynn: I guess so! Tahmoh: But I got to see, and like I said before, he was doing very specific stuff, so I was able to incorporate it. But it was also not far off from what I was going to do, so that made it easier. And then, getting a sense of where they were thinking of taking the character, that’s when I started changing some of – not changing, but I started adding to who I thought Gadreel was. And I started making some different specific choices. Because the unfortunate thing is when they don’t really give you a sense of where your character is going to go and their arc, but only a loose idea, you also have to remain open to changing some of your choices. You might be making some strong choices, but they just might not work. Lynn: [nodding] Tahmoh: And so you have to be open to that as an actor. And I’ve done it before, I’ve put in a ton of work and made some strong choices, and then you come in, and the producer or director is like, actually no, we need you to do more of this, and you’re like welp okay! Lynn: (laughing) You don’t really think about the amazing flexibility that acting requires. Especially when you’re a guest actor I think, you’re always going in and creating characters who aren’t the leads and so there hasn’t been the amount of backstory given to you. I remember talking with Curtis Armstrong about how he struggled sometimes with Metatron on Supernatural because he was never given the whole story and didn’t know where the character was going. So like you he kept making choices and sometimes they worked and sometimes… Tahmoh: (laughing) Yeah! I totally can relate to that, and Curtis is so fantastic and did such a fantastic job. I could definitely see that was the case with him too, you know?  I felt that the writers were taking Gadreel in a very sort of evil nemesis sort of way and I just felt like I wanted to play against that a little bit.  And when Jared was playing him, he was doing it too – I could see it clearly in his performance, so he kind of set that up for me also, which was great. Lynn: And I think it really worked out in the end because Gadreel did get to be heroic. I think that all of us who were feeling a fondness for the character – much like Metatron –  were second guessing ourselves going hmm why am I feeling this way? We were probably picking up on those subtle things that you and Curtis and Jared were doing, but it made sense eventually because both of them got to be heroes ultimately. Tahmoh: That’s awesome, yeah. Lynn: It was, it was cool.  I won’t keep you too long – and I’m astounded that I’ve managed not to have a coughing fit for 20 minutes – but is there anything else you’re excited about or going up for that you want to talk about? Tahmoh: I’ve done three episodes of Incorporated, a new sci-fi series which is really well done. I got to work with an actor I’ve long admired, Dennis Haysbert, and with Allison Miller. I’m having a blast doing that right now! Lynn: It was so great to talk to you again – we really do miss you on the convention circuit, and I hope our paths cross soon. I’m really looking forward to seeing you on Deep Six. Tahmoh: Great talking to you soon – be well, love. ETA: Imdb tells me that Tahmoh is also part of the new series that’s generating a lot of buzz, Netflix’s Altered Carbon, a futuristic show in which your consciousness can be saved when your body dies and then implanted into another. Some big names are attached, with a very diverse and international cast, so stay tuned for that one also! In the meantime, you can come along for the ride with Deep Six.  Check out some behind the scenes videos on their IndieGoGo page, follow them on @DeepSixSeries, and stay tuned for more! https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/deep-six-a-hard-scifi-with-practical-fx-series-space#/ Behind the scenes stills courtesy of Deep Six.

Movie TV Tech Geeks News

#Battlestar Galactica #Deep Six #Featured #Interviews #Supernatural #Tahmoh Penikett

[ecofinisher]

The Adventures of Super Nathan 3 - Chap 2

Chapter 2

https://archiveofourown.org/works/23301076/chapters/56062444

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13531960/2/The-Adventures-of-Super-Nathan-3

https://www.wattpad.com/857516885-the-adventures-of-super-nathan-3-chapter-2-back-to

Nathaniel and Lila sat in the living room watching TV together both eating a sandwich they had bought before on their way back home.

"You have to try this out next time. It tastes way better than nachos" Nathaniel told Lila, watching her bite on her sandwich. Lila's kwami flew up at Nathaniel's sandwich to check his sandwich and sank her head from seeing the melted cheese on his sandwich.

"It contains milk, right?" Trixx asked seeing Nathaniel swallow down, then he wrapped up the paper of his sandwich to see the ingredients. "Lactose intolerant people can eat this type of cheese" Nathaniel explained as he found out, the cheese it had didn't have a lot of milk. Trixx smiled and removed a piece of meat covered with cheese and took a bite of it. "Mmh"

Nathaniel raised his eyebrows at the TV show and glanced at his wife, which passed with a napkin over her lips, cleaning a bit of sauce away. "This scene makes me think of the times, where you weren't in Paris. After your very first akumatization. Marinette thought I was gay because I didn't show any girl interest."

"Well, it's also hard to judge someone, when you don't see or notice any crush on someone. But how did she come to that thought?"

"I think it's because almost every other guy at the school either was obvious with their crushes or they had at least one or two crushes. I had Marinette, then I had on Ladybug, which ended up being her again. Then it was Miss Vixen, which in the end was you"

"Okay.....well I gotta admit there was a time I thought Sabrina had a thing for Chloé but was wrong too,"

"Well this is why we shouldn't judge people before we get to know them," Nathaniel said. "What my mother used to say a lot" Nathaniel mentioned making Lila chuckle.

"She's a great mother, Nathy" Lila complimented earning a nod from Nathaniel.

"Sometimes she embarrasses me in to the most unwanted times, but what do you want. She's my mother. She's one of the most important persons of my life"

"Just like me" Lila added with a wink earning a nod from the redhead.

"In making me feel embarrassed in the most inappropriate moments, you're the queen," The German descendant man said making Lila laugh.

"You know how much joy I have seen you that way. That's what Schadenfreude means, right?"

"Uh not really. Schadenfreude means you have joy seeing someone fail or getting humiliated"

"Alright......uh mai.....Mein Schatz?"

"Yeah, I'm your tesoro?" Nathaniel asked earning a nod from the brunette.

"Come let's keep watching the episode, now it's going to be interesting" Lila mentioned earning a nod from the boyfriend and the two looked at the TV to see a robot appear and behind their TV screen a white hole appear and a blue and white dressed superhero showed up with large fake bunny ears and wielding a white umbrella on the back.

"Super Nathan, Miss Vixen. Quick I need your help, the future is in danger"

"What happened?" Nathaniel asked while Lila gazed a little suspicious at the woman in a tight suit.

"Who are you?" Lila asked and Trixx approached Lila as she recognized the miraculous of the person.

"She's using the bunny miraculous. It allows the user to create portals and traverse through time" The fox kwami explained. "Listen to her, it's important"

"Something happened today, that affected the future. You two need to come"

"Okay, what did we do wrong?" Lila asked watching the bunny-themed heroine shrug her shoulders.

"Did you two do anything unusual today?" The heroine of the future asked and Nathaniel exchanged looks with the brunette.

"I had a normal day at work, I met Luka at the coffee and we drank a coffee. Luka talked something about apparently seeing pregnant women everywhere he looks at. I've texted Kagami, Adrien, Marinette, Rose, Alix, Juleka, my mom, her mother, the Agreste's.....ugh everyone I could to not forget to pass tonight by the Pont des Arts, where I planned along with Rose a surprise for Lila. We two were there as superheroes and got married as superheroes in front of our superhero team and some of the parents, that knew about our secret. Then we did all a picnic and now we're here....well me and Lila,"

"Hmm is it possible, that someone told you or took pictures of the wedding and spread it around or something?"

"No, no one did any pictures. Our family would never reveal the secret to anyone, not even closer people inside our family"

"Okay, then come you two. I need you two to fix the future for me" The heroine explained. "In case you don't know my name. I'm Bunnyx"

"As a superhero, I'm Super Nathan," Nathaniel told opening his jacket for his kwami to fly out.

"Great, look you two really need to hurry. We don't have much time" Bunnyx warned watching the two civilians turn into Super Nathan and Miss Vixen. "Great, now I need you two draw two bowls to put them over your head"

"Uh.....why?" Super Nathan asked placing his pen on the tablet.

"Look the more you know and see, the more it affects the future, just do what I say" Bunnyx ordered earning a nod from Super Nathan, which drew a bowl, which appeared over Bunnyx's hands, afterward a second bowl appeared over the first bowl landing in it and the heroine of the future covered Miss Vixen and Super Nathan's head with it. "Now give me your hands and I'll bring you to the future," Bunnyx explained grabbing both their hands to walk into the portal landing in a white dimension filled with various blurred circles all over the place.

"It's kinda cold here" Super Nathan mentioned then Bunnyx let him and Miss Vixen go, then checked her portals looking for the portal, she needed to use.

Miss Vixen lifted up the bowl of her head and widened her eyes at seeing the giant space she was in it.

"It's just as big as the Terd" Miss Vixen mentioned, then got hit with Bunnyx's umbrella on the bowl to cover her eyes.

"I beg you," The pink-haired heroine asked making Miss Vixen sigh.

"Don't worry Miss Fox, you'll be out of here ASAP" The bunny-themed heroine assured passing her hand over another portal, then smiled as she spots the one she was looking for. "Give me your hands" Bunnyx ordered receiving the hands of the heroes and the heroine jumped with the couple behind her through the portal landing in a devastated alley of Paris. Bunnyx took the bowls of the two heroes' heads watching them stare in shock seeing, what happened to their city.

"Oh my gosh," The vixen-themed heroine gasped seeing the city all damaged. "Where are the people?"

"You two need to find out, where your future you's went. I stay in here as plan B, in case you two don't succeed"

"Is it possible, that you can call Cat Noir and the others from our timeline to help us?"

"I see how you two handle this and if I see you need help, I'll send them in"

"Okay" Super Nathan answered watching the heroine disappear along with the portal. "Now we're all by ourselves"

"Yeah, just where the heck should we go in all this mess?" Miss Vixen asked watching Super Nathan take his tablet to restore his jet pack from his savings in its memory.

"We should look from above the sky" Super Nathan suggested, then he took off in the air along with his fiancé flying over the empty roads, passing by abandoned vehicles left on the streets.

"I have never seen the streets as empty as now" Miss Vixen mentioned earning a nod from the purple-skinned superhero.

"It's terrifying"

"I really wonder, what happened, that caused this here" Miss Vixen mentioned passing over the arc de Triomph, which had the edge broken.

Inside the sphere Bunnyx swiped her hand over a blurred image seeing the superheroes around Super Nathan and Miss Vixen as they were getting married. Bunnyx fast-forwarded the time showing the heroes sitting together on a two picnic tables sharing various drinks with each other and celebrating the reunion of the newlywed couple.

"Fu said it is okay for us to keep the miraculouses as long as we don't misuse it," Ladybug told it to Ryuko and Cat Noir, who sat in front of her. "Otherwise I could store them back in the miraculous box"

"What about the other ones?" The blonde hero asked. "You have kept them save, right?"

"Sure" Ladybug answered. "Well after that incident with Volpina I made with Luka together a cosmetic box to hide them all in there,"

"Nice"

Bunnyx fast-forwarded the time again passing by the house of Marinette's family, then noticed a person on the lot, where the Françoise Dupont school was, which had witnessed Ladybug landing on top of the roof with a surprised face. Bunnyx went further with the time watching Marinette's house there people entering and leaving the bakery, passing by and crossing the road in time-lapse and Bunnyx noticed the same person from the first scene appear several times checking the building out and the people, that visited the bakery beside that person itself. One the owners of the bakery left, moments later followed by Ladybug, which left from the rooftop and the person sneaked over the road at the bakery and tried to open the door with the help of a screwdriver and managed to get in. Soon Ladybug appeared entering from above the balcony, moments later a person now dressed in a dark purple suit carried Marinette away in the arms, making Bunnyx shriek.

"This is not good"

Super Nathan and Miss Vixen passed over the seine near the Notre dame spotting a single boat in the middle of the river. Super Nathan stopped in midair looking down at the boat, which he recognized as the houseboat of the Couffaine family. Miss Vixen turned around to see Super Nathan look down and turn down, heading down at the ship, followed by the brunette, then they landed on the ship encountering nothing but chaos, which was usual to be seen in the Liberty.

"You've got something?" Questioned the brunette looking at Super Nathan, which gazed at the entrance down to the boat and he walked towards the entrance, followed by Miss Vixen, which took her flute at her hand to be prepared in case of an emergency.

"Hello?" Super Nathan spoke stepping slowly into the living room of the Couffaine's moving to the right to spot the counter to the small kitchen and he found on the top a printed out screenshot of a news site with an image of Marinette Dupain-Cheng. Super Nathan picked the page up to see, what it said.

"Marinette Dupain-Cheng, age 24, missing since September 12th" Super Nathan read and Miss Vixen glanced at the newspaper to see the news.

"Luka Couffaine is in pre-trial detention until more clues were gathered about Dupain-Cheng's disappearance......I don't think Luka could have anything to do with it,"

"Yeah, something else must have happened to her. How many days is she missing?"

"I think only two days. What day do he have?" Super Nathan asked making the woman shrug her shoulders. "Good question"

Miss Vixen entered into the kitchen passing by the fridge noticing a couple of post-it notes stuck on the door. Miss Vixen took a better look at them finding a non-regular notice on the fridge.

"Nath, come check out the notes here" The Italian heroine called the partner, which approached her to check the notes on the door.

"There just to remember things, here an appointment at the optician, here about unclogging the toilet and that one here in the middle......uh.....that really sounds suspicious......J, open the drawer from my bed and look for a silver-colored bracelet, which looks like a snake biting its tail. Put it on and you'll figure out, what to do"

"I think Luka left his miraculous in his bedroom for Juleka to use it" Miss Vixen noticed earning a nod from the partner. "Is it possible, that she had seen it yet?" The brunette asked, then Super Nathan ran into the bedroom of Luka and spots on the bed a note in a sketchbook and the man glanced into it.

"It's Juleka's handwriting" The redhead discovered from recognizing the little untidy writing.

"Whoever reads this I went together with Honey Bee to save Marinette. If we don't show up the next 24 hours, send help to the abandoned area service at the A22, where the entrance is blocked from the streets."

"Okay, I think it's near to the entrance of where the arc de Triomph is" The purple-skinned guy mentioned earning a nod from the heroine. "We should check it out right now" The fox miraculous told the fiancé which nodded.

"Sure, but do we need a plan?"

"We see about that later"

Later Bunnyx saw the two heroes had arrived at the blocked road entrance of the, then the two heroes chatted with each other and noticed Super Nathan draw something on the tablet, which appeared on Miss Vixen's hands and she used it to draw on the ground.

"I think I better go and get Ladybug here, just in case," Bunnyx said running across her portal, then moved on a portal above the city landing on the boat of the Couffaine's to see all dinning together with the Dupain-Cheng's. Bunnys fast-forwarded the scene, watching Luka and Marinette disappear along with Juleka in the bedroom of the Frenchman, making Bunnyx smile as she spotted the trio alone and entered through the portal to get into their room.

"Whoa, who's that?" Luka asked surprised at seeing the bunny-themed superheroine.

"That's.....she's the bunny miraculous holder from the future" Marinette recognized the hero. "And.....I think it's Alix"

"No time for explanations, Ladybug I need you to assist Super Nathan and Miss Vixen to save your future you from whoever kidnapped you and the moth miraculous"

"What?" The trio spoke at the same time at the revelation of the hero from the future.

"You have to come"

"Is it urgent?" Marinette asked. "I'm pregnant and Tikki says I should not go in fights with the others, cause the miraculous cannot save me from a miscarriage"

"Oh," Bunnyx said. "Could you use the miraculous?" Bunnyx asked the boyfriend of Marinette.

"Just the snake one, but Kagami and Adrien have used it. Mostly Kagami"

"Great" Bunnyx answered grabbing the guitarist by the hand pulling him into the burrow.

"Whoa!"

"We'll be back as soon as we took care of the problem, don't worry about us" Bunnyx assured Marinette and closed the portal for the girl.

On the other side inside the mansion of the Agreste's Adrien sat on the couch along with Kagami and his younger sister Hope watching a movie together. Hope noticed Kagami had a tear running down her face, then hugged the woman looking up with her eyes worried about the woman.

"Are you okay?" Hope questioned watching Kagami pass her thumb under her eye to clear her tear away.

"I'm fine. Just a little emotional with the scene," Kagami answered, then Adrien gazed at his girlfriend also noticing her.

"Shall we pause?" Adrien asked making Kagami shake her head.

"No it's alright" Kagami answered. "The scene is really touching for me"

"Yeah. Honestly, the addition of a Coldgame music just turns the scene greater, than it is" Adrien confessed. "You know some of the songs I play on the piano are from that band"

"Bro, bro, look at the big statue in TV" Hope shouted pulling Adrien's arm and aiming at a giant statue covered with blue petunias on the TV screen. "Ming did that"

"Really?" Adrien asked earning a nod from the blonde girl. "Wow"

"I can feel, that you're not really enthusiastic about the flowers, right?" Kagami asked making Adrien grin a little embarrassed.

"I didn't know, what to answer her" Adrien explained seeing Kagami smirk. Behind the three a portal opened and Bunnyx jumped out landing in the bedroom of Adrien Agreste.

"Adrien, Kagami, I need you two, now" Bunnyx ordered earning a nod from the blonde man, while Kagami was a little confused.

"Is she a miraculous holder?" Kagami asked earning a nod from the boyfriend.

"Look, look, he gave her a flower. He loves her! He loves her! He loves her!" Hope chanted making Kagami giggle.

"If they end up together, it's the 16th cliché movie I watched this month" Kagami mentioned seeing Bunnyx shake her head.

"The two actually don't get together in this movie, but that's not what we're talking about, Kagami can you take the miraculous of Ladybug and assist Super Nathan, Viperion and Miss Vixen their fight?"

"Sure, but what about Longg?" Kagami asked watching her kwami get up from the coffee table along Plagg, which as usual was nibbling on one bit of Camembert.

"You can use both miraculouses together. So You'll be able to use Ryuko's powers and the ones from Ladybug" Longg explained watching the Japanese woman nod in understanding.

"Here place them, where they belong and follow me" Bunnyx ordered earning a nod from Kagami, which had put the earrings on her ears summoning Tikki, the kwami of luck.

"Hi Kagami" Tikki greeted the former owner she had belonged before, which smiled at her.

"Now to be able to use both of us, you have to say, Tikki, Longg, Unify" Longg taught the owner, which nodded again at the kwami.

"Tikki, Longg, Unify!"

#miraculous #miraculousladybug #tomatofox #adrigami #Kagami Tsurugi #adrien agreste #nathanielkurtzberg #nathanael kurtzberg #lila rossi #bunnyx #alix kubdel #fanfic #fanfiction #fic update #fanfic update #ao3 #Wattpad #archieve of our own #ecofinisher #ecofinisherfanfics

[homalfaut]

Dream recount 8/20/18

I was walking down a street after hanging with Marc.

It’s a main street,

very similar to Broad Street…

But not Broad Street.

Judging by the height of the sun

I wanna say it’s about 3 o’clock,

prime busy time.

A dark skin man whose health is seeming to come closer to it’s expiration date with each rotation of the sun approaches us.

The wrinkles on his skin read about a mid 40 with his height being barely over 5 ft.

His smile is very warm and welcoming,

in an off-putting way due to his sun orange teeth (which he seems to be missing 5 of).

We had a short ,dry conversation that seemed to blend in with the rest of the noises in the background.

Roaring car engines,

Unruly teenagers,

entitled college students,

this conversation blends in with it all,

but feels different.

Only when you’re part of it. At least.

I don’t remember what was discussed or any details of the conversation.

Just that he approached me the way you’d expect a homeless person to approach you before telling their rehearsed sob story.

But upon opening his mouth I realized he knew something about the universe that I didn’t.

A secret.

And that the person he was looking around for… Was me.

There is one part of the conversation that never escaped my memory though.

He told me, “I’ll be seeing you again”, through very promising eyes.

And that’s where it began.

Time-lapse

I’m at the restaurant I work at.

The place looks somewhat similar to my actual job but it’s more fancy and polished.

Bundles of people with a gay air about them are steadily streaming in and out of the restaurant.

It wasn’t overflowing but it wasn’t empty.

My coworkers seem to be very fond of me, managers included.

This day at work feels very bright and upbeat.

Maybe my mood has too turned merry, possibly in correlation with the incoming customers.

My coworkers are around discussing what they are going to be doing once work has ended.

Drinking,

Smoking,

Hanging out at a bar, conventional late night past times.

But what do they accomplish through this other than temporary happiness?

The high goes away,

The drunk goes away and 95% of the conversations won’t even be remembered.

They all involve hours of small talk, just to have an animated conversation that won’t make it

past the setting of the moon.

Not that I don’t enjoy these pleasures as well… I just get very reclusive sometimes so I tend to avoid them.

I don’t contribute much to the conversation, I never do, but I know that there’s a lovely lady I am to be expecting after.

That’s my pleasurable vice,

women that look like they could kill me.

I catch myself daydreaming about her.

She’s the sister of a friend.

I can’t seem to recall if he’s a close friend…

Or any other details about him.

But the thoughts were never about him anyway, they were about her.

She was very attractive,very unorthodox features.

Naturally silver, almost crystal, sparkling hair

Eyes a shade of blue that seemed to not exist before she did.

Skin almost pale enough for her to be translucent,

She just seemed to be unre-

“Everything okay Bernard? You’ve been just standing there for a couple minutes now.” my manager chimes

“Yeah, I’m fine, just had something on my mind.”

“Oh, well the night’s dying down, so you’re good to go for the night.”

“Gotcha, thank you!”

I had never been more elated upon clocking out in my entire experience working here.

Usually it’s kinda bittersweet, my coworkers are very wholesome people and every second around them just feels refreshing.

But today I had a more uplifting experience ahead of me. Or so I thought.

Time-lapse

I’m hanging out with the girl and her brother at… I actually don’t know where we are.

Me and her are laying down with each other on the dark-beige carpet with a blanket over top of us.

Our bodies in some oddly perfect unison with each other, like the sun and the moon in constant orbit.

She devours my attention making me void of the world around me.

Nobody but us exists in this moment…and her brother who could intervene at any second.

I have this recurring problem of never letting myself fall into any moment when there’s any possibility of an external force breaching it.

But I told myself I should feel more free than that, that nobody can take you out of your moments except yourself.

I don’t know how much time we’ve already spent together by this point in time or how long we’ve even known each other for

But I can tell the answer to both of those questions isn’t as long as it should be before you get as intimate as we were without one force being scared of the other.

But the moment was perfect, it felt like we’d already known each other for a lifetime,

Like we’ve had conversations that had preceded the existence of any living creature,

Almost as if our sole existence in this fabricated universe was for each other.

Something like… Destiny.

As perfect as it was though i can’t seem to remember a single word shared between us.

I just remember at some point our conversation was replace with a fragile embrace from her lips to mine.

Make note it was her lips to mine.

More fragile kisses were shared between our glass lips knowing very well one of us could break in this moment.

Soon her fingers begin to cascade down my chest to my stomach

they reach my waist and suddenly i hear her brothers footsteps.

She remains unflinching and the only response i can manage is “Are you okay with this?”

Referring not to me being with his sister but to me having this moment almost in front of his very eyes.

He gives permission and expresses no discontent with the affair happening before his eyes then proceeds back up an adjacent staircase.

Yet another thing that struck me as weird during this whole experience.

Everything happened between us seemed to be a blur except one part

We never reached the point of having sex, but some form of pleasure happened that night.

I’ve always been more in love with the girls I never ended up having sex with than the ones I did.

Maybe because I felt more obliged to chase them,

Maybe because the lack of sexual intimacy was filled up with other forms of intimacy that couldn’t be replicated,

Maybe because we were more compatible romantically than we were sexually,

I’ll never know so I don’t ponder on it.

We went back to kisses that were less fragile this time for we have long lost the fear of breaking.

She invited me to her house in hopes of us seeing each other again.

I was more than reluctant to meet her again, but I couldn’t shake the ominous feeling that grew within in me as soon as I agreed.

Time-lapse

I’m at my house

It’s the type of place you’d see in the Jetsons

The building itself is beyond the height of a skyscraper,but my room is a very big bubble room

It’s doesn’t have any futuristic characteristics like the Jetsons but has a metallic baby blue color to it.

Kinda like the one you’d see in a sci-fi film.

There’s a huge window opposite of my bed,

It’s wide enough to look like a movie projector screen you’d see in a movie theater.

Another weird factor to mention is that I don’t remember the view from the window, if it was the sky or if it was a cityscape, or even worse,

If it was nothing.

Some subtle aspects of feng-shui are present.

Usually hang outs are held at my place, but you can tell why.

I’m with another girl.

Her features are more normal and demonstrate that she’s made from the earth in its purest form.

Her skin a dark shade of brown that is also reflected in her eyes as if both were summoned from the very core of the earth herself.

Soft dark curly hair gently caresses her face,

She exists as if every beautiful part of nature came together to create one person.

I can’t remember any dialogue shared between me and her but knew we were both there for an affair.

I had felt a safer and realer feeling with this girl than the other one but couldn’t bring myself to get into her

It’s that feeling of being attracted to something that you know isn’t good for you.

You feel like it would make your life more interesting as opposed to something that will probably help you out more in the long run.

I don’t remember what occurred between me and her during our time together other than an obscure conversation that consisted of me dodging our true purpose for being there.

But nothing pertaining to a sexual experience happened here.

Time-lapse

I arrive at her place

Correction: I’m in her place

I have no recollection of how I got there or even entering i just know I’m in there.

The only people that reside here are her, her Dad and her brother.

The house itself produces a very strange aura.

The best way to describe how i felt here was like how Alice felt when she fell down the rabbit-hole into Wonderland

Very lost, confused, slightly terrified…

and surreal.

For some reason the house felt small and continuously shrinking yet i seem to fit perfectly within the house at all times.

We started talking, but it felt as if she were trying to lure me into her.

As if her sole existence in my life was to be some kind of lure into an ingenious trap of the universe.

The unison wasn’t  there any more. it was more like i was the ocean

Flowing, naturally

And she’s the moon

Pulling me to flow harder but almost towards her in a way that I couldn’t resist.

Then she started changing.

And i don’t mean the type of changing like when you’re dating someone for a long time and over time they start becoming comfortable and changing,

I mean her entire physical appearance was morphing before my very eyes in a matter of seconds.

her eyes started becoming black lines spiraling around their sockets,

Wrinkles cascaded the surface of her face on all ends,

Her almost transparent skin glowed and became suddenly translucent,

her jaw dropped long enough that you could fit a soccer ball in her mouth,

And there were no teeth or tongue that belonged to her mouth either but now it was an endless black abyss.

You could easily sink in there and not come back. Ever.

I’m pretty sure that’s exactly what was happening to me too.

As this transformation is happening she is saying something… Something that no matter how hard i try to recall my brain just refuses to do it.

As if i’m better off just never truly remembering what she said.

Maybe I am.

Suddenly two guys in beige suits with white button up shirts underneath and black ties come in and pull me out of the room.

They’re faces were ridden with distress and urgency, as if they had feared for my life more than i had.

I was still in shock and my face could only manage a blank facial expression

Time-lapse

I’m in the office with the guys.

A couple days have passed since the incident but I still haven’t fully let it sink in.

My eyes are weary and droopy, you can tell i haven’t had any proper sleep (if any at all) since the incident.

Me and the men are discussing the scenario from start to finish, and every detail of every second from top to bottom.

I remembered what she said at that moment and told them what she said.

We were able to decipher that she wasn’t a creature of our society, we didn’t know what she was or what she would’ve done with me but we all knew it wouldn’t have been good for me to stay in that situation.

I was easily able to decipher what she was saying and the meaning behind it but i told the men that i had to withdraw from the investigation.

I already felt as if I was a huge target and that wouldn’t be my last encounter with her or her species.

Continuing in this investigation would only increase my name being in some type of spotlight and their chances of coming into contact with me again.

Time-lapse

Me and Marc are at the nearby mall.

Marc has yet another “fool-proof” plan about how we can shoplift a couple of things we don’t really need without the mall security guard noticing.

Malls in this world aren’t like malls in the real world.

They’re in the similar shape as my room which makes them feel slightly futuristic in a sense.

Stores are spread out side by side in one giant culdesac formation.

Also, You kinda just get your stuff from the individual stores but it’s not like the individual stores have security or anything at the front.

There’s only one entrance to the whole mall so you can only walk in that way and walk out that way.

We gathered up the stuff from the stores we wanted and then we’re heading out hoping the security guard doesn’t investigate us, because ya know, sometimes they don’t apparently.

Our hopes were wrong.

He questions us about the things we have but in this society you don’t necessarily get arrested for attempting to shoplift, you just kinda look like an idiot.

As he’s rummaging through the stuff he also tells us to beware of this guy.

He fits the description of the exact man from the beginning of the dream.

Suddenly i turn around and the man says “Glad to see you again.”

Then I woke up.

[theramblingonesie]

Sweet Tooth Sal: Criminal Intent

It started off as just any other Tuesday at the theater. My staff was working hard selling tickets and restocking the merch, the event organizers were running around town dropping off paperwork and making sure our special guests stayed special, and the volunteers were taking the time and care to explain to me that they knew how to do my job. I was busy running my tiny world in stilettos, saving customers’ lives one light switch and one lost pair of glasses at a time.  Our shows were running on time, the theater was clean, and audience members were engaged in lively, thought-provoking discussions.

And then, it happened.  For what some might argue was only a trivial $3.79, my world went black.

*************************************************************************

Being the venue manager at a film festival is pretty cool.  On one hand, it’s very long hours and you basically miss everything. On the other, you have the opportunity to meet some wonderful artists, and feel proud when your work helps to create a safe container to transport audiences into other worlds—worlds of deeper feeling and meaning, worlds of pleasure and escapism, worlds of introspection, connectiveness, and healing.  I know that being middle management is kind of the butt of many elitist jokes, but in this particular position, I really enjoy it.  I have enough autonomy and control that I’m able to have fun with my staff and our environment, encouraging everyone to work hard but also explore their creativity and prioritize their individual needs. At the same time, I have the joy of getting out of customer complaint jail by saying “yeah, that’s a total bummer, but I don’t make the rules. Feel free to chat with my boss, but in the meantime let’s work to make you comfortable.” Or even, “yeah, I ALSO wish we sold beer and wine here. I know, we’re the worst. For what it’s worth, I’m also suffering by being sober.  Enjoy the show!”

*Goes into the back room and pours a glass of Prosecco that my amazing boss brought me*

Even with minor frustrations and moments of stress, the joy and love of the event wash over it all and return me to a space of inner peace and purpose.

Except for one time. That one fateful Tuesday.  Let’s return to our story.

**************************************************************************

As I return to the lobby from testing the microphones, the sea of a buzzing audience parts to show me a gentleman waiting, unattended, at the merch table. I come around the corner to discover that it’s not a customer, but a roaming staff member who has, to this point, caused me a lot of frustration.  Daily, this person has squeezed me out of my office space, and demanded extra tasks and favors that are not only a part of my job description, even though he is not someone who has any authority over me.  I frequently wonder, every time he comes by, why on earth he’s even in the building.  There is another man who carries the same job title, who is ever-lovely and a joy to be around.  But this man, this particular pain in my ass, is just oblivious, to say the least.

We’ll call him Sweet Tooth Sal.  

I come around to the back of the merch table and flatly ask, “Hey Sal. What do you need?”

“Hey Sam! Let me buy one of those chocolate bars!”

“We don’t sell chocolate bars here, Sal. Per usual, we only ever have water.”

“Oh, well shoot. I just ate the chocolate that was in the back room, so I figured I’d just give you a couple bucks to grab another one.”

 See: Flames.

Sentence example: Flames on the side of my face.

 For those of you who don’t know me, let me explain my relationship with chocolate.

Chocolate is sacred.

Chocolate is necessary.

Chocolate is life.

Reece’s is not chocolate.

Hershey’s is not chocolate.

Chocolate costs a minimum of $3.00 per bar.

Chocolate tells me I’m beautiful and holds me when I cry.

Chocolate tells me I’m a boss when I’m stressed at work.

Chocolate is the first to celebrate my successes with me.

Chocolate rescues me when my blood sugar drops from forgetting to eat.

Chocolate is a gift to my friends.

Chocolate is for sharing with people I love.

 CHOCOLATE NEEDS TO BE ASKED FIRST.

 I had purchased three very special chocolate bars to keep in the breakroom for the duration of the festival for all of the above reasons. Said chocolate is only sold at one specific store in the area, so they’re not easily replaced. And of all people, I was not interested in sharing with Sal.

My oscillation between rage and shock happened too quickly for my brain to fully connect with my mouth.

“No, Sal. That was my personal chocolate. It was very special chocolate that you can’t buy here. You can only buy it at (insert health food store name). It’s not cheap.”

“Oh, well, you left it out in the breakroom, so I figured it was for everyone.”

“It’s not for everyone. It’s mine. I had it tucked off to the side.”

“Yeah I was gonna replace it, but since you don’t sell it here, whoops! Sorry!”

What could I do? I was stunned! I know, most of you are reading this like, “I WOULDA PUNCHED HIM IN THA FACE!!!!!!!!!!! I WOULDA SCREAMED AT HIM! I WOULDA MADE HIM DROP TO HIS KNEES AND TURN OVER HIS WALLET!!!!!!!!!! I WOULDA CALLED THE COPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I WOULDA CUT HIS TONGUE OUT AND FRAMED IT ON THE WALL AS A WARNING TO ALL THOSE WHO DARE EVER CROSS ME AGAIN, AND THEN DOX HIM ON FACEBOOK!!!!!!!!!!!!”

I’m sure you would have.

I, on the other hand, hate confrontation, and offered a mousy, ‘splainy finger-wag as my whole body shook:

“Um…well, Sal…uh, that breakroom is, um, for like, festival theater staff, and it also belongs to the theater’s regular staff year-round, so y’know, we need to be mindful of sharing space, and it’s really…uh it’s nice…you…we all need to ask before we take other people’s food cuz maybe someone brought something that was very special to them or mmm maybe they can’t afford to replace it, but like, it’s just good to ask first cuz yeah…”

 I think I made it as far as “uh, that breakroom is, um” before he turned around and walked away.  The rest of my mumbling was done at his back, and probably continued after he had turned the corner and closed the theater door behind him.

YEAH, GO GET HIM, TIGER. YOU REALLY PUT HIM IN HIS PLACE.

So I did the only thing one in my position could reasonable do.

 I texted all of my friends about it.

 I felt better after speaking with them, as they totally confirmed the rudeness of the situation. I settled comfortably back into my chair and began slowly burning each letter of Sweet Tooth Sal’s name into my dead-to-me list.

The next day, as I was running around doing my usual duties, Sweet Tooth Sal pulled me aside and said, “hey. I’m sorry about yesterday. I got you this”, and he handed me a new chocolate bar. I inspected the bar. It was dark chocolate with espresso. It looked nice. The ingredient list checked out. Again, I was in shock, but I took a deep breath, looked up and said, “thank you, Sal. That’s very kind.”

A new anger bubbled up inside of me. It was strange.  I knew I should have felt relieved, that justice was served, and that it was time to shift into a space of forgiveness.  But for whatever reason, I was almost angrier. I was angry that I couldn’t be angry at STS anymore, and then angry at myself for not being a more enlightened human who could just accept and move on.

I paced. I paced for what seemed like eternity.  I texted my friends again, venting how angry I was about not being allowed to be angry anymore, because he technically did the right thing.  I was bitter. I was bitter that he finally gave me a solid reason to write him off, an obvious offense, and then took it back, putting me back into a place of dealing with the guilt over just generally disliking him.

I sat at my desk stewing and eating the chocolate.  I wondered what was happening inside of me that made me so attached to my anger, and then re-anger upon un-angering.  As I contemplated, STS came back out of the theater and slimed his way behind the merch table and right up next to me.

“Hey Sam. So, heh, a guy buys a girl a chocolate bar to say he’s sorry, and then comes out of a movie to ask if she’ll split it with him. Whaddaya say?”

“Yes.” I replied. “Absolutely; help yourself.”

“Thanks! Yeah I just kinda grabbed this from the other theater. Is it any good?”

“Oh, it’s delicious. Yes.”

My righteous anger returned. I was elated.

STS returned to the movie, and I completed his name on the dead-to-me list. Glowing.

And then I released it.

****************************************************************************

When I tell this story to other folks, I get a mixed reaction. Mainly, due to the purposely absurd delivery, most just get a laugh out of it.  Some see my behavior as cowardly, others understand the depth and layers of my reaction, many a combination of both.

Anger, in the kingdom of emotions, is one of my closest friends and dearest allies. Due to my specific cocktail of mental illness and trauma, I have horrible boundaries.

I am terrified of saying no. Even when I say no, I feel like a bad person and my abandonment fears kick in.

I don’t want to be the loser, the prude, the psycho, the dummy, the weakling, etc. 

I don’t want to hurt people’s feelings or be a disappointment.

I don’t want to be the cause of pain, and I don’t want people to dislike me.

I don’t want people to lash out at me, shame me, or attack my core in a defensive, hostile response to me saying no.

I don’t want to be left out in the future because of the one time I had to say no.

 Does this sound like most women you know?

Anger, in its healthy expression, is simply “no”.  It’s not throwing chairs. It’s not ripping out someone’s heart. Sure, those actions may follow the initial inner anger signal, but that’s not the essence of anger itself. I will repeat this over and over again—

Anger is the signal inside of you that says a violation has occurred and you need to set a boundary.

That could be anywhere from your favorite mug being left out dirty-- “Ugh, boo, no. Hey friend, do you mind just washing my mug after using it? Thank you!”

To finding out your partner has cheated on you-- “FUCK YOU NOOOO. We’re going to therapy.”

To hearing horrors in the news-- “NO, I will not stand for this. I’m registering to vote and donating to those who can help.”

The word “violation” feels big and extreme, yah? It doesn’t have to be that way. Whether it’s a little grr or a big grr, it’s important to know when our bodies are saying, “hm, this doesn’t feel good”, the same way we learn to understand our food cravings.  When we crave a certain food, that doesn’t mean we’re starving and have a nutritional deficiency so low that we need to go to the hospital. It just means, hey, this thing wants our attention so this beautiful machine can stay powered up and healthy. We don’t need to wait until we black out on the floor before changing our diets, just as we don’t need to wait for a heart-breaking tragedy for us to admit we feel hurt, unsafe, or disrespected.

I try to remind myself of this on the regular, because I still struggle with it.  I hold onto my anger for dear life, because it’s the only emotion that helps me to feel safe. As a person with very loose and questionable boundaries, I am very easily manipulated and taken advantage of. I have a talent for attracting people with hidden agendas, control issues, and narcissistic personality traits, as well as being the person that will bring out dirty behavior in people who are otherwise fine around others.  I used to view this from the lens of a person with a strong victim complex.  These days, as I no longer wish to have that be my identity, I recognize how deeply people’s energetic signatures affect us and influence certain behavior, and my role in how what I feel/present will elicit certain behaviors in others.  A frequent conversation I have with friends—

Friend: “Huh, that’s so weird. That person’s never done that to me.”

Me: “Of course they didn’t. Because you have self-esteem/social status.”

For people like me, as we’re navigating the path of being adults and figuring out how to heal ourselves, anger may be our saving grace. As the storyteller in me presents the bit about Sweet Tooth Sal through humor and drama, the human in me knows exactly what was going on in my head at the time.  This man had been behaving in an entitled, arrogant, rude manner for days.  Because I didn’t want to be seen as an oversensitive asshole, nor did I want to create a tense environment (which usually happens whenever I stand up for myself or my friends; also, people get really flipped out when tiny femme-presenting women are assertive) I just kept “letting it go”.  When he pulled this shit with my chocolate, it wasn’t about the chocolate at all. If it were anyone else there, I probably would have laughed and said, “you owe me a drink, you jerk!” Or, “oh please, I’m happy to share. Which one did you try? Isn’t it so good?”

But this man represented everything I hate about fragile masculinity and entitlement.  He was white, middle-aged, a social climber, a misogynist, and pushed my staff and I around as if we revolved around him.  As soon as he gave me a direct, personal reason to dislike him, I took it.  It felt good, because that part of me that was angry every time he was in the building was saying, “thank you for setting this boundary. Now we don’t need to engage with him.”  When he wanted my forgiveness, the part of my mental illness that leaves me easily taken advantage of became activated and scared. My anger jumped up and said, “but we felt safe when you were angry and had to tell him no. If you drop this, he will hurt us again. He’s manipulating you into not holding him accountable for him behavior; please don’t let this slide.”

But then my social conditioning kicked in and shamed me by saying, “y’know, people think you’re a terror and weak-minded for your anger. You’re a joke. Healthy people let things go.  Healthy people don’t cry about everything. If you don’t forgive him, it just means you’re a hateful person who likes discord. No one is going to believe your side, and he’s gonna tell the organizers that you’re a bitch and you’ll never get hired back.”

Conflicted, I just sat there and prayed, as I often do in situations where I feel stuck like this.  I kept saying, “I need to be angry, but I’m so scared to say so because he’ll just attack me and call me crazy. Everyone else will say he’s nice and I’m just creating problems. Please, please universe. I don’t trust that this person will miraculously wake up and stop being a pain in the ass. Please let him show his true colors again so I don’t have to go digging for them to prove a point. JUST GIVE ME A REASON.”

Moments later he did.  So when I laugh about being pleased about regaining permission to be angry, it’s not about being happy that this guy is a jerk.  In an ideal situation, it would have been great if he was never a jerk at all. It was the relief that he did the dirty work to prove my point, and I didn’t need to go through the painful emotional labor to call him out for it.  I was already exhausted from chasing after him all week for going into places that were off limits, throwing his equipment all over my paperwork and computer, tossing about my merch organization, and interrupting me in the middle of my job so I could serve him with something that was 100% his responsibility, only to have him unapologetically puff off and have mini-mantrums every time in response.

“But, but you told him it was fine! That’s a lie, and passive aggressive!”

Yep. You’re right. But with some people, you just have to smile while you hand them the shovel, tell them what a beautiful hole they’ve dug, and then walk away, because you’ll probably never get through to them with reason or vulnerability. And I found that, since I settled in my mind on him being total turd and no longer wrestling with whether or not I was supposed to like him, it was far easier for me to set boundaries for the rest of the week, because I had 0 investment in us getting along.  Whatever special treatment he wanted and wherever he wanted to go that was not accessible, I just smiled and said no.  I didn’t try to excessively explain myself or blame myself for his inconveniences. I just said no, gave him an option or two about how he could find an alternative, and then let him figure it out.

I think this story is important, because a lot of people assume that since I’m directing a project all about women’s anger, then I must be some kind of expert. Some people have called me the Queen of Anger.

I’m not.

More like, Queen of Self-Doubt Who Constantly Questions Her Reality And Just Wishes People Respected Her But Is Too Afraid To Ask For It And Why Can’t They Do It Without Being Told.

I really, really struggle with anger, which is why it’s so fascinating to me.  I’m often either trying to hide it, or exploding when it builds up too much.  By creating The Scarlet Tongue Project, part of my intention is to contribute to developing a world where women who struggle like me, and anyone else who struggles like them, don’t need to be afraid of this emotion anymore, and we can use it authentically to create the brightest, healthiest, loving lives we can.

If something hurts you today, I hope you are able to give yourself permission to be angry and say no.  If you don’t feel ready for that yet, but want to learn more about women who do, you can help out by supporting the Patreon for my film project at https://www.patreon.com/thescarlettongueproject

Thank you for reading!

 https://www.patreon.com/thescarlettongueproject

#rage #anger #boundaries #red #women #intersectional feminism #chocolate #fire