#today’s good things

[edandstede]

today’s good things #5: picked up my fully grown 20+kg staffy so she could look out of the kitchen window at the rain and hail, and she softly wagged her tail with her paws hooked over my shoulder. she asks for uppies now and again and it always surprises me because i never thought she would! i also dragged her bed to the kitchen so she could snooze there in a sun puddle while i got to work painting our kitchen doors (we’re decorating) and i text a photo to my boyfriend because she was being so cute. now she’s asleep in bed next to me and her little snores are tickling my arms and she’s taking up so much room but i literally don’t care. she’s an angel. ❤️

#i love her to the ends of this earth i really really do #adopting her was the best thing we’ve ever done #poor baby spent 2+ years homeless in kennels. and was likely abused before that #now she sleeps in our bed and has so many walks and two families who love her #she has so many bones. umpteen blankets. her own coat rack #i swear she was a piece of my soul i didn’t know i was missing #getting misty eyed here i’m gonna go give her cuddles #quill to paper #personal #today’s good things

[theoldaeroplane]

worried that thing you put in your art or writing or game or music is too self-indulgent, too self-referential, too niche for anyone but yourself? fear not! you can do whatever you want forever. and you should.

#writing #art #music #games #things i have to remind myself of daily #anyway ive found those things you're worried about sharing are often the most powerful things you CAN share #i hope you write #<- i would like to replace that tag with something that is less conversational #it makes reblogs awkward #anyway good morning. i have so many things to do today but instead i am crafting a memorial to my partner's best friend in my fanfiction.

[iamanartichoke]

I don't know who needs to hear this, but as a creator -

I am fine with "the audience" -

downloading my fics

printing my fics

copy/pasting or screenshotting my fics

sharing your saved copy of my fics with anyone else who might want them in the unlikely but never impossible case that my fics are no longer available on ao3

making a book of my fic(s) and running your fingers across the pages while lovingly whispering my precioussss

doing these things with anything I create for fandom, such as meta, headcanons, au nonsense like 'texts from the brodinsons,' etc

I am not fine with "the audience"

doing any of the above with the purpose/intent of plagiarizing my work or passing it off as their own in any capacity

feeding my work into ai for any reason whatsoever

Save the fandom things. Preserve the fandom things. Respect the fandom things.

Enjoy the fandom things.

#fanfic #ao3 #archive of our own #fandom things #tumblr things #i may have said this at some point #i'm sure i have #but whatever - just in case #i don't say this with the presumption that i'm so amazing and people are clamoring to save my fics #but just if anyone is so inclined that's all #ftr i don't intend on ever removing my fics from ao3 or deleting fandom things from this blog #i've always shared my fandom things with the intent of keeping them shared bc that's the whole point of posting #but the fandom atmosphere and ao3 constantly being under attack who knows what can happen #not that this applies to anyone but should all else fail you can also reach out to me and i will personally give you a copy #at least of fics bc i save everything #not so much the tumblr things but this is a good reminder to myself that i should do that for the things i care about #that i've made or done and only posted here #anyway sorry i have now used up my quota of the putting words into sentences doing for today #i have plans to stare into the void now

[giantkillerjack]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need. #the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist. #the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28! #a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents. #they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong. #and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives. #you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead? #or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of. #no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow. #i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong. #just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

[mobius-m-mobius]

A lot of people have talked about Benoit Blanc's accent. Was he always going to sound like that, was that in the original script?

#daniel craig #benoit blanc #for y'all who get the pleasure of watching glass onion today!! #i'm not gonna be able to gif the movie right away so left a couple things in drafts but hope you all LOVE it it's so good :') #everyone say thank you daniel craig for the correct interpretation of subtlety 🙏💖 #dcraigedit #dianagifs

[yanderespamton78]

Edit since a lot of people seem confused - your "real" name is the name that you want to be referred to in real life. It doesn't have to be your legal name. So if you're trans and you have a different name to whats on your birth certificate, even if not many people call you by the name, it still counts as your real name.

Edit 2 : Holy shit guys please stop reblogging this post my poor inbox im getting like 20 notifs an hour asjfhkajshdkh /lh /srs

#FUN FACT : charlie isnt my real name :] #i decided to go with the name charlie because i didnt wanna use my real name and i like the name charlie #my parents were gonna call me charlie when i was born but didnt in the end #i dont really know why i dont just tell you lot my real name because its a super common name #another thing that using a diff name online has caused is me seeing “charlie” almost as a different person #theres “[wearegonnapretendiputmyrealnamehere]” and then theres “Charlie” and they are two different people in my mind #idk aksjffhkajsshdka #anyways this is the second poll ive made today what is my deal with polls #i should make a seperate poll tag for all my fucking polls that i make #I MAKE A LOT #ill tag all my polls when i think of a good name lol #anyways woah i got a bit rambly there #did i make a whole ass poll just because i thought you might find it interesting that my real name wasnt charlie? #yes. yes i did. #(DO NOT take this as me not wanting you lot to call me charlie i would prefer you use that name over anything else lol) #polls #tumblr polls #random polls

[fence-time]

Enamoured by Skizz’s enderman <3

#fence posts #skizzleman #technically…. #from todays guess the build episode thing :D #my god he’s so good at everything /reg #/ref*

[those-rainbow-ninjas]

hello ninjago community 🧍

#hi its been a while since i posted ninjago art ehe. #idk i watched the latest season of demon slayer today and was like “ninjago playlist might have some good insp for drawing them!” #drew ninjago instead. ofc. #might draw a crossover thing #prob not tho #ninjago #jay walker #lloyd garmadon #lego ninjago #jay ninjago #lloyd ninjago

[twyllodrus]

bright young things (2003) / good omens parallels

#good omens #bright young things #aziraphale #miles maitland #crowley #michael sheen #david tennant #goodomensedit #my gifs #rewatched byt at 4 am today #had to do smth so #it's mostly miles. just like the reviews on letterboxd skjsdks #some of these r randomly b&w bc i'm garbage at coloring :// #also the one w/ miles & crowley putting their sunglasses on #it's here specifically to cause psychic damage that's it :^)))) #anyhways luv clowning around 🤡

[edandstede]

today’s good things #3: it really feels like spring right now and it’s wonderful! walked my dog under a blue sky with the accompanying sound of great tits singing as well as people’s garden tools for the first time this season. i saw that the lovely little mining bees have returned for another year and i was SO happy to see them! we stood and watched one happily digging a hole in the soil for a bit, they never fail to fascinate. the local church’s tree is in full bloom, the daffodils and crocuses are all out, i have washing outside on the line, and everything just feels a bit warmer and more lively :•)

#today’s good things #quill to paper #personal

[dizzybizz]

"this is regrettably the best kiss of your life, you understand?"

#that “you understand?” kills me everytime... #i love how high condis voice got during this bit its so fkn funny DHASHGFSFGHASFhg #hi yes have the inevitable ep21 crit kiss piece except i watched ep53 today and am so 😀 im so 😀 damn i m so 😀 #i love eps where they just go through so many different gimmick rooms its so fun its so fun when its not so painful 😀 #happy valentines too ig #just roll with it #jrwi riptide #gillion tidestrider #jrwi chip #jay ferin #jrwi fish and chips #my art #i had a bit of a meltdown over gill through uhm... 1-3am today and i just hm #sorry to everyone in the mayors QAC uhm im not really sorry but like sorry if you could hear every msg ping uhm yeah #it was like hours of me sobbing to myself in the interests channel and it was really good for my mental health ngl like its really therapeu #-tic to just scream abt a blorbo all night #and i ended up dreaming abt infodumping to one of my brothers friends of all ppl n i got so intense abt how much i love marshall john n my #brother came into the room and dragged his friend out 😭😭😭 i just wanted to ramble abt the himbo pls..... #my walls of tags are so consistent... only consistent thing abt this fkn blog smh.

[pcktknife]

drawings i did on the train :]

#it was HARD. that thing was schmoving today very bumpy ride #ib #danganronpa #junko enoshima #aoi asahina #mary guertena #myart #there was also mini junkos + kotoko but the pics werent good so they got scrapped

[romansmartini]

“doctor who is well written” if you say so i guess “doctor who proved trans girl magic is real and features the penultimate bestie relationship and david tennant is openly having the time of his life” now this we can’t possibly refute

#doctor who #i’m sure i could find things to criticize about it. in fact there are many. and those who are critiquing it keep up the good work #i just know i looked at david tennant for an hour today and i liked it #and when i read posts that mention pacing my eyes glaze over. what is this pacing you’re talking about

[mobius-m-mobius]

#no one's getting the memo 😅

#crowley #david tennant #nina sosanya #good omens #good omens 2 #so much content today but i've only got two free seconds and this popped into my mind first 😅 #love that of all things *this* is what he chooses to get hung up on lmao #and even then you know he'd run the boookshop in a second if aziraphale gave him those eyes aslksjgdk #goodomensedit #dtennantedit #good omens spoilers #dianagifs

[obikinetic]

Star Wars: The Sub Awakens

Aka, Anakin has a very ill-timed ~realization~

This is my contribution for Sub Anakin Fest [@anakinfest], which I actually didn’t sign up for but decided to butt in on anyway! As such, this doesn’t correspond to any prompts :)

#subanakinfest #star wars #obikin #anakin skywalker #obi wan kenobi #sw fanart #fanart #art #please please tell me if I went about this the wrong way because I have no idea what I’m doing #it’s a very good thing the deadline kept being pushed back because I literally just finished this today 💀 #I am HORRIBLE #anyway I’m glad I got it done because I really wanted to participate #ik this is barely subby but it was fun to me at least!

[biggirldreaming]

that low ‘oh fuck’ with their head thrown back

#it does things to me ngtl #so so good 😮‍💨 #voice kink through the roof lately #personal #mine #rambles #needy baby today #voice kink